#and that whole thing about how journeys dont really end | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

cupoftaae · 1 year

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Hello! your writing is such a comfort to me, and Im a sucker for domestic, fluffy type shit to be honest. could you do something cute like reader is pregnant and tae like journals and vlogs all the time because hes so excited? Was gonna write something like this but I dont think I could do it justice.

uhg this is so cute omg. Thank you for reading my work and im so glad it can offer some comfort, thats such a sweet thing to say :(

I hope you enjoy! <3

warnings- swearing, mentions of pregnancy

ladybug - KTH (drabble)

Saturday, june 11th, 2022

Taehyung set his phone down on the desk as it recorded him, he smiled and jokingly waved. "hello, today is.." he leans to check the date, "June 11th, its Saturday and the time is 4:54pm. Y/N is in the bathroom taking another pregnancy test because she is now a week late" he laughed and spun side to side in his chair. "I dont know why, but...I have a really weird feeling about this one, a weird but good feeling" he smiled and looked down. The past year has been very exhausting mentally for the both of you. After getting married, you both knew you wanted to have children right away, but your body didn't get the memo.

It was purely negative after negative, to the point where you refused to even take any tests for 3 months...up until now. Taehyung knew he wanted to journal your journey so that years from now you both could look back on the firsts of parenthood. He wrote down everything, from the good days to even the ugly ones, every appointment, every test, everything was in his notebook, and he was hoping that today would be *the* entry, he had a feeling it would be, so he decided on filming it just in case.

"ok, we have to wait 5 minuets" your voice is heard off camera as Taehyung looks up and across the room at you, "Ok" he smiles, waving you over. "cmere"

you nervously walk over as he places you onto his lap, long arms draping around your waist as you exhale. "filming?" you asked, watching him nod. "Do you want me not to?" he asked, "no, its fine, but what if its negative again?" you sigh and turn your body so your back is to the phone.

"then i can just delete it like the other ones" he ran his hand up and down your back, attempting to soothe you best he could. He was in his whole little nervous energy world right now and couldn't imagine how you were feeling, it had been months since the last test, and you werent sure you could take another hit with the reminder that your body isnt working.

It seemed like you had been waiting forever, tae had paused the camera 3 minuets after you came out, playing with your hair as you remained silent, hand in his. Your phone alarm could be heard from the bathroom once the long wait had ended. You, in that moment, wish you had another 5 minuets, because the second the alarm filled the air, your heart has stopped. "Im nervous" you whisper, standing up slowly as taehyung followed. "I know sweetheart, but we won't know unless we look, yeah?" he cupped your face gently, thumbs caressing your cheeks as he pressed a soft kiss to your lips.

You led him into the bathroom with you, "Wait dont turn it yet" he giggled and ran back to his phone he had left in the bedroom. You stared down at the upside-down test which sat on the edge of the sink, feeling your pulse in your ears. Once your husband returned, he closed the door and set up the filming, setting it a bit against the mirror as it faced you both. "dont be nervous, whatever it is, we will get through it ok?" he soothed, hugging you tightly and swaying a bit. It had been a few moments of preparation and deep breathing before finally feeling confident. "Ok ...im ready" you nodded, making him smile, "yeah?", he lifted the test, not flipping it yet. "yeah, but....you need to read it because I think I'll throw up if I do" you laughed, hiding your face in his chest as he breathed out, counting down in his head before finally flipping it.

"what does it say?" you whispered, fingers lightly gripping his t-shirt. Taehyung giggled nervously, "angel, Im not too good at reading these types of test....I-..I dont know if you are pregnant or not"

You let yourself smile at your husbands antics, pulling away to face the test, eyes widening. "baby..."

"what? is it negative?"

"Baby...two lines means pregnant, im pregnant." you turned to him, "Im pregnant" you whisper, taehyung not fully registering it until a few seconds after, head looking back down at the test.

"youre pregnant....." he looked back to you before a smile creeped onto his face, pulling you over and gently lifting you into his arms as tears escaped both of your eyes. there was no talking, just quiet (happy) crying, and touches and squeezes of love and emotion.

He finally set you back down and held your face. "Finally, damnit" you joke, making him laugh as he leans down to kiss you. "we are gonna be parents, baby. It is happening" he cooed sincerely, your hand wiping at his tears. you nodded, "its happening"

He kneeled down and lifted your shirt, his cold hands against your still flat stomach. "hi there" he whispered, making you cry even more as your hand ran through his hair. "we just found out about you, but mommy and daddy already love you so much" he kissed above your navel and held you close.

"Im so glad we got that on camera, fuck" you laughed as he stood up, wiping a tissue under your eyes. "I know!!" he sniffled and kissed you again. "god, I fucking love you"

"I love you too"

Tae picked the camera up and held it to both of your faces, making you giggle a bit. "welcome to the adventures of two 20 something year olds figuring out how to be parents, tune in next week for 'realizing we are too poor for this'" tae finished, shutting the camera off as you laughed and gently slapped his chest.

You sighed contently as he walked back into the bedroom with you, already becoming clingy with just the way he holds you. "this explains so much" you sit in thought, "I thought my period was coming because I was crying so much last week over everything but I guess not"

Taehyung smiled and crawled onto the bed next to you, hand rubbing your stomach. "oh my god, Taehyung, I had wine 2 days ago" you frown, grasping his hand. "im sure its okay, my mom used to have some wine when she was pregnant with me, and I think im okay" he smiled at you, his eyes scanning over your features lovingly. "dont stress, sweet girl, you are gonna be a mommy. We will plan an appointment this week and Ill be there for you ok? I promise" he kissed your hand as you looked up. "I love you so much"

"I love you more"

Thursday, November 20th, 2022

You had taken back everything you said about first trimester being the worst. Second trimester had absolutely everything to despise, and you realized it more each time you began to outgrow an article of clothing.

"theres mama" taehyung smiled brightly as he walked out of his office and into the living room with his camera, filming you on the couch. "shes wearing my sweatpants" he whispered and sat down, flipping the camera to the both of you. You pouted and looked at him, "baby I dont wanna be filmed, i look really gross" you sigh, "No you dont, you look sexy" he teased before shutting the phone off.

"are you still dizzy?" he asked, hand gently rubbing your thigh. "a little...but not as much"

the dizziness you've experienced since the second trimester has been the cause of worry for the past few weeks, despite your doctor telling you its normal.

"Just stay here, chill out and drink water" he smiled and got up to refill your water.

"I hate sitting down all day, its annoying" you huff, laying against the pillow. "I know baby, I know, but its not like your being lazy, you are creating a whole human, its a lot of work mama." he spoke, shutting the fridge to see the ultrasound photo hanging on the door.

You smile at him as he walks over, thanking him for the water. "Do you need anything else?" he asks, hand rubbing your slightly bigger stomach. You wouldn't have guessed you were almost 6 months pregnant, your bump has remained relatively small throughout the entire pregnancy, which you were thankful for, however it seemed like the weight just travelled to other parts of your body, like your feet.

"can you just lay with me?"

"of course baby" he moved to lay behind you, pulling you against him as you both watched tv, his hand finding its familiar place against your stomach, feeling soft flutters, something thats been occurring more recently.

"little ladybug is awake" he whispered and kissed your shoulder. You laugh and place your hand atop of his. You two had never figured out the gender, wanting to be surprised until they made their arrival, but Taehyung had a habit of calling the baby by "ladybug" ever since last month when you two laid outside and a small ladybug found its way to rest on top of your bump. He, of course, wrote the whole thing down in his journal as it happened.

Taehyung deep down didnt care the gender of his child, but he really wanted a little girl. A mini you. He wanted to take care of and protect his princesses all the time, and he so desperately wanted to make you both happy.

2 months later

You had woken tae up around 4am with severe cramping and back pain, he joined you on the floor in the bathroom as he placed a cold cloth on your neck. "just breathe, sweetheart." he sighed, trying to calm you down.

"What if they are coming early? Its too soon tae, and I-"

"shh, everything will be ok. You and ladybug are ok" he kissed your head. "Do you want to go to the ER?" he whispers, watching you nod as he helps you up carefully.

he helped you slip on your sneakers before getting into the car as he began driving to the hospital. "It doesnt feel like, I dont know how to explain.." you mumble, taking deep breathes

"What do you mean, love?"

"It doesnt feel normal and Im afraid something is wrong. Ive never felt this befor- ah!" you whine and hunch in pain as tae holds onto your hand and whispers soft words, promising he is driving as quick as he can.

Once he had helped you into the hospital, the doctor made him wait in the waiting room until they figured out what was the issue. Half an hour of leg bouncing, lip picking, and deep breathing later, a nurse finally stepped into the room to alert him of the situation. "Mr.Kim?" she asks, walking over as he sat up and nodded.

"ah, ok, So y/n is perfectly healthy and ok" she smiles and sits, "what she was feeling, is what the medical industry call 'braxton hicks', they are completely normal, its basically the body preparing itself for when the labor does in fact come." she adds, watching tae instantly relax upon hearing this. "I know its scary for a lot of first time parents but she and baby are in good health"

"thank god" he exhales and follows her back into the hall as he meets up with you again.

"Baby already causing problems for mommy huh?" he jokes and kisses your head, making you giggle and reach for his hand. "Did she tell you?" you ask

"mhm, nothing to worry about."

"kinda scary, if pre-labor feels that bad....then how is real labor gonna feel" you sigh, trying to avoid the thought despite the fact the baby needs to get out one way or another in just a few months.

"hey, look at me" he smiled, "everything will be ok, im right here" he squeezed your hand and leaned to kiss you softly, making you feel better already.

"I know, thank you"

Once you had fallen asleep, taehyung sat at the tiny desk across the room and began to film himself. "Hi ladybug, we are at the hospital because we thought you were making your grand entrance a month and a half early" he laughs quietly "but no, thank god. just stay in there and keep growing, you will meet us eventually" he smiled, "we love you"

march 3rd, 2022.

2:23 pm

You and taehyung had been adding the finishing touches onto the nursery, placing soft little blankets and bedding into the crib taehyung put together. "I like the colors, I think baby will like it" he spoke, adjusting the drawer and adding some more things into the hospital bag.

You were 9 months pregnant at this point, and there was nothing you hated more than moving. you sat in the rocking chair and nodded, watching your husband clean and organize. "hm what about this?" he asks, holding up a onesie that had pink ruffles. "are we bringing this"

"yeah" you smiled and ran your hand over your stomach

"ok" he put it into the bag and zipped it up, placing it by the door.

"Ok, I say we go get some lunch now. Let me help you get downstairs" taehyung smiled and reached out to hold your hands. You groaned and stood to your feet, wanting to just put all your weight against him. "you ok my love?" he coos

"mhm"

He began bringing you down the stairs and into the kitchen when you suddenly gasped, leaning against the back of the couch. "what??" he turned, watching your face turn to horror as you looked down. "I think....my water broke" you yelp in pain as a sudden sharp cramp covers your abdomen. "fuck, ok it hurts" you grasp onto his arms.

"ok, ok, uhm, well, well we need to go to the hospital now" Tae rambled, looking down at the small puddle, unsure where to go as he didnt want to leave you. "Go get the bags please, hurry up" you whisper as you rely on the support of the couch to keep you up.

Taehyung had ran quickly upstairs, nerves fueling his body but yet a smile creeped onto his face. His baby was finally coming, after all of these months, all of these moments, from when you told both of your families, to your baby shower, ultrasounds, shopping...its all coming together right now.

On his way back to you, he grabbed his phone and mindlessly began to film. "no time to talk, apparently you chose lunchtime to come greet us" he laughed and held the phone into his pocket as he came into the living room.

"tae it really fucking hurts" you cry, reaching for him again as he puts a coat over you. "I know sweetheart, its gonna be okay. We are gonna meet our little ladybug soon" he whispers, helping you stand on your own. "we are, huh" you breathe out, sudden excitement filling you.

"we are, time to officially be parents" he smiled and brought the bags into the car before helping you into the passenger seat. "I called Jin, hes coming to watch yeontan" he mumbled as he tried not to speed down the street as your groans became louder.

"hmmph, shit" you gripped the headrest of your seat as you tried not to cry, squeezing taes hand. "sorry if im hurting you"

Taehyung laughed, "its okay sweetheart, just breathe and focus on baby." he assured.

And thats what you did for the next 7 hours

"Hello my little ladybug" taehyung held his camera up to his newborn daughter as she laid against your bare chest. You were sweaty, tired, sore and ready to sleep for months, but you couldn't help but want to capture every moment with your new little family. "We waited so long for you, our sweet girl" he spoke, voice cracking as his hand reached out to hold hers, tiny fingers wrapping around just his one. Your eyes grew wet as you looked at him. "We are parents" you whispered, kissing your daughters head.

"you did such a good job, you are so fucking strong" he kissed you softly before turning his camera off, focusing all on you both.

"I cant wait to show her off to everyone, and spoil her" he added, watching her wide eyes look over at him.

"shes gonna be a very happy little girl" you smiled, watching the sweet interaction. between the two of them. "here, hold her again" you insisted as tae helped you sit up, taking the small newborn out of your arms gently.

"hi" he whispered, listening to her little coo's. He looked at her like she was his whole world. He never knew he needed anything more in his life after he married you, but now he can say with honesty and pride, he feels even more complete.

His wife, daughter, tannie and him.

His little place in the universe.

#taehyung smut #taehyung #kim taehyung fanfic #kim taehyung #taehyung fluff #taehyung fanfic #tae x reader #taehyung drabble #tae fic #tae smut #tae drabble #tae fluff #bts fluff #bts x reader #bts smut #bts fanfic #bts #bts taehyung

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bobacupcake · 10 months

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Oooh, what about Journey? I think the sand probably took a lot to pull off

it did!! i watched a video about it, god, like 6 years ago or something and it was a very very important thing for them to get just right. this is goimg to be a longer one because i know this one pretty extensively

here's the steps they took to reach it!!

and heres it all broken down:

so first off comes the base lighting!! when it comes to lighting things in videogames, a pretty common model is the lambert model. essentially you get how bright things are just by comparing the normal (the direction your pixel is facing in 3d space) with the light direction (so if your pixel is facing the light, it returns 1, full brightness. if the light is 90 degrees perpendicular to the pixel, it returns 0, completely dark. and pointing even further away you start to go negative. facing a full 180 gives you -1. thats dot product baybe!!!)

but they didnt like it. so. they just tried adding and multiplying random things!!! literally. until they got the thing on the right which they were like yeah this is better :)

you will also notice the little waves in the sand. all the sand dunes were built out of a heightmap (where things lower to the ground are closer to black and things higher off the ground are closer to white). so they used a really upscaled version of it to map a tiling normal map on top. they picked the map automatically based on how steep the sand was, and which direction it was facing (east/west got one texture, north/south got the other texture)

then its time for sparkles!!!! they do something very similar to what i do for sparkles, which is essentially, they take a very noisy normal map like this and if you are looking directly at a pixels direction, it sparkles!!

this did create an issue, where the tops of sand dunes look uh, not what they were going for! (also before i transition to the next topic i should also mention the "ocean specular" where they basically just took the lighting equation you usually use for reflecting the sun/moon off of water, and uh, set it up on the sand instead with the above normal map. and it worked!!! ok back to the tops of the sand dunes issue)

so certain parts just didnt look as they intended and this was a result of the anisotropic filtering failing. what is anisotropic filtering you ask ?? well i will do my best to explain it because i didnt actually understand it until 5 minutes ago!!!! this is going to be the longest part of this whole explanation!!!

so any time you are looking at a videogame with textures, those textures are generally coming from squares (or other Normal Shapes like a healthy rectangle). but ! lets say you are viewing something from a steep angle

it gets all messed up!!! so howww do we fix this. well first we have to look at something called mip mapping. this is Another thing that is needded because video game textures are generally squares. because if you look at them from far away, the way each pixel gets sampled, you end up with some artifacting!!

so mip maps essentially just are the original texture, but a bunch of times scaled down Properly. and now when you sample that texture from far away (so see something off in the distance that has that texture), instead of sampling from the original which might not look good from that distance, you sample from the scaled down one, which does look good from that distance

ok. do you understand mip mapping now. ok. great. now imagine you are a GPU and you know exactly. which parts of each different mip map to sample from. to make the texture look the Absolute Best from the angle you are looking at it from. how do you decide which mip map to sample, and how to sample it? i dont know. i dont know. i dont know how it works. but thats anisotropic filtering. without it looking at things from a steep angle will look blurry, but with it, your GPU knows how to make it look Crisp by using all the different mip maps and sampling them multiple times. yay! the more you let it sample, the crisper it can get. without is on the left, with is on the right!!

ok. now. generally this is just a nice little thing to have because its kind of expensive. BUT. when you are using a normal map that is very very grainy like the journey people are, for all the sparkles. having texture fidelity hold up at all angles is very very important. because without it, your textures can get a bit muddied when viewing it from any angle that isnt Straight On, and this will happen

cool? sure. but not what they were going for!! (16 means that the aniso is allowed to sample the mip maps sixteen times!! thats a lot)

but luckily aniso 16 allows for that pixel perfect normal map look they are going for. EXCEPT. when viewed from the steepest of angles. bringing us back here

so how did they fix this ? its really really clever. yo uguys rmemeber mip maps right. so if you have a texture. and have its mip maps look like this

that means that anything closer to you will look darker, because its sampling from the biggest mip map, and the further away you get, the lighter the texture is going to end up. EXCEPT !!!! because of aisononotropic filtering. it will do the whole sample other mip maps too. and the places where the anisotropic filtering fail just so happen to be the places where it starts sampling the furthest texture. making the parts that fail that are close to the camera end up as white!!!

you can see that little ridge that was causing problems is a solid white at the tip, when it should still be grey. so they used this and essentially just told it not to render sparkles on the white parts. problem solved

we arent done yet though because you guys remember the mip maps? well. they are causing their own problems. because when you shrink down the sparkly normal map, it got Less Sparkly, and a bit smooth. soooo . they just made the normal map mip maps sharper (they just multipled them by 2. this just Worked)

the Sharp mip maps are on the left here!!

and uh... thats it!!!! phew. hope at least some of this made sense

#trappedinavelociraptor #ask #potion of answers your question #gamedev stuff

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goatedgreen · 1 month

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Okay lets analyse this one for realsies. Im gonna go through each character in this tweet and go through reasons why i think they either would or would not be crying first, then im gonna put them in order of who survives the roast sesh.... join me on this wonderous journey.

Let's start with Atsumu.... where to even fucking begin. sorry to the Atsumu haters but i truly believe he would not be crying first. First of all he has known Osamu since he was born and while Osamu is the "nice twin" the bar is truly in hell and that motherfucker is mean to one person and one person only and that person is his twin brother Atsumu. This mfer has been conditioned since birth to roast and be roasted. Not only that but this guy was CANONICALLY hated by everyone in his middle school, and his only reaction to that information was "So?" HE DOES NOT CARREEEE. And, I will say, while the other characters shown here are bitchy, they usually target people in petty ways that make fun of their skills (with the exception of Daisho who would probs call Atsumu a single loser but he'd likely just get annoyed by that not cry) and Atsumu knows that his skills are too good for anything they say to hold weight., He has the ego the size of the fucking gym. he's fine.

TSUKISHIMA on the other hand.... dare i say it not the strongest contender ... I dont think FIRST. but this guy is wayyyy more sensitive to criticism than people generally give him credit for. LIKE YES BEFORE YOU JUMP DOWN MY THROAT, he absolutely has the whole "keep booing me it only makes me stronger" thing going on in the Inarizaki game BUT YOU FORGET SO QUICKLY how absolutely insecure this guy is. until yamaguchi kicked his ass into gear in the training camp, he was of the impression that trying to get better at something he enjoyed was fruitless because there was always going to be someone better than him. Someone insightful like Oikawa or Atsumu would def be able to pick up on that insecurity and target him for it. I think his strongest talent is of course provoking people so much that they cant see how much they're affecting him, so he gets a lot of points for pettiness that would keep him from crying first because theres no way he's gonna LOSEEEE to someone like Daisho or Oikawa. BONUS POINTS on his behalf though is he was the only one on the team at the end of season one who WASNT CRYING about their loss. And i think the only one on karasuno who we havent seen cry (as far as i can remember).

Now listen.... fanon Oikawa is for sure crying first because for some bizzare reason people characterise him as a pushover twink. Canon Oikawa told USHIJIMA to remember his worthless pride so he could crush him in the future. like... he's kind of taking names a little. i'll allow him a small slay for his efforts of being a bitch to Ushijima. Oikawa is SMARTTTT and has a lot of emotional intelligence, so can for sure target people's insecurities with pinpoint accuracy. He doesnt get SUPER easily riled up when he's "in the zone" and only lashes out when he's backed into a corner. he hangs out with what is probably a team of people scientifically designed in a lab to HUMBLE HIM DAILY, so he has built up somewhat immunity to being insulted and targeted for bully behaviour. LOSES TREMENDOUS AMOUNTS OF POINTS for being kind of a sore loser and someone who FOR SURE cries when angry or frustrated.

Daisho.... why is he even here (sorry to those who love him). Listen... this guy is petty, and he lowkey cheats, and he takes immense joy in riling people up for shits and gigs... BUT WHYYY IS HE HERE LMAOOOO. to be honest, i dont think he would cry first purely for the fact that he doesnt know these other guys well enough to really gaf about what theyre saying to him. on the other hand, that makes him kind of an easy target because he's so irrelevant to these other guys lives that they could probably make him feel like shit for that reason only. he gets bonus points for being the only one in a canonical relationship (oikawas girlfriend we never meet that he broke up with doesnt count, in fact it loses him points).

WITH ALL THAT BEING SAID. the final order i think is, Oikawa goes out crying first, not because he's upset but because he got sooo fucking mad at Atsumu's unbothered behaviour he had to leave and he was angry crying while doing it. Daisho is next because Tsukishima said some shit like "bro who even are you lmaooo irrelevant ass" and he remembered he sucks at volleyball and got upset, he's okay tho bc his gf is there to comfort him. Atsumu cries next but not because of anything Tsukishima says, he just gets so fucking bored of Tsukishima not giving him interesting reactions to his jabs that he starts doing weird shit like standing on his head and he ends up hurting himself and crying because he is a big baby. Tsukishima is the last one standing .

...

That is of course assuming that Oikawa doesnt kill them all first with his Super Triple Homo Spin Serve that killed all of Karasuno. People forget so quickly that he is the most diabolical anime villain of all time...

#haikyuu #suguru daishou #tsukishima kei #miya atsumu #oikawa tooru #SORRY SORRY I JUST WANTED TO DO THIS BC I FOUND IT FUNNY

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princesssmars · 6 months

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a royal affair

after their trumph against the crone and a long journey home, jade and kit return to a bustling kingdom and a tense relationship. little do they know the answer to their problems lies in a foreign princess.

wc : 6.096

contains : sfw and nsfw content. takes place after the season ends. dont ask me how they got back idfk. fxfxf poly relationship. kit and jade mutually start to like reader so no cheating. slight jealousy later but all resolved. reader is a fem!princess. skin color not described. reader is described as having hair. reader wears dresses and pants. arranged marriage but it ends well promise. nsfw includes kissing, oral, and penetrative sex. a strap on because i like em. switch reader, switch jade, dom kit bc i think its be cool if she was a freak idfk.

a/n : i need to be neutered. disney bring willow back or i send b0mb. kingdom name generator sucks so yes ur kingdom is one from skyrim. enjoy.

it was over. it was finally over.

after a few months on the road fighting for their lives, discovering lost and painful secrets, and facing an ancient evil and actually surviving, the group from tir asleen were so glad to return home.

and none of the group were as thankful to return home as kit. sure when she got back she'd have to explain to the king of a neighboring country that his son, her fiancée, had died suddenly at the hands of the crone, and she'd have to deal with her best friend who was now more than that who was a member by birth of a clan she and her people previously thought were barbarians, and don't get her started on the whole thing with her dad actually still being alive.

but on that first night back as she takes a two hour long bath and flops onto her bed, she realized it was all so worth it.

when they returned it was nothing short of chaos. at that point a good portion of the people had thought the group had perished on the road, either due to the harsh climates, thieves, or probably just their own poor judgements and inexperience. but the kingdom had collectively lifted in spirits when the new heroes of tir asleen returned, victorious against a great evil and bringing back their beloved prince.

(the news about the whole giant evil wyrm thing was kept under wraps as to "not disturb this long needed sense of peace", as said by queen sorsha herself, who was surprised but not rejecting when as soon as they returned both of her twins slumped into her arms and gave her a giant warm hug.)

this so called sense of peace brought more changes than they expected. it was almost like the realm was revitalized, the daikinis expanding their reach and the nelwyns trusting willow enough when he suggested that they stop living in darkness and start rebuilding their community.

it was really nice, for most people to not be so afraid all of the time. but kit couldn’t truly revel in the shared joy of the people. not when she knew what she had learned out there.

that jade was a bone-reaver. that she had a sister and a whole community waiting back for her in the wilderness, and soon she would have to make a decision if she would stay here, with kit and the people who technically had stolen her from her family but she had nevertheless grown to love, or back with the reavers to build a connection with people who would welcome her with open arms.

every day between the two was tense. those romantic feelings were still there, obvious between the gazes in hallways and the frantic make outs in the dead of night in each others beds. but there was a weight, a sinking feeling in the both of their stomachs after each shared moment. the knowledge that one day this might end.

a few weeks into their return they don’t get much time to feel on it, as queen sorsha is alerted that two kingdoms from the north and the east have heard of the kingdoms triumphs and would like to visit to form alliances. kits a bit shocked that her mother seems so open to the idea, but figured anything would be better than her focusing on the threat of the wyrm and what will come of the shaken galladoorn king.

the preparation is a whirlwind, workers of the castle working day and night to get ready for the stay of distant royalty. whenever she’d stop by the kitchens to sneak away a snack it was as busy as she’d ever seen it, her favorite cook margaret always rushing her out before she could get a pastry.

kit had to admit she was wary about visitors. it’s not like a journey akin to the one she went on made for a perfect tale of random hospitality when it came to new people.

nevertheless, the time for the royals banquet came in the blink of an eye. she had spent a great deal of the day letting her lady’s maids get her read, taking a bath after an early morning air with jade, fixing her tousled hair and putting her in a classy yet breathable dress.

when she finally does get to the feast, she’s surprised by how much fun she actually has. a few lower ranking royals and warrior had coke from each kingdom, and spent the night telling stories from their pasts and some even reenacting them for the queen. kit swore she even saw her mother laugh at one of the stories, something about a stupid man falling head over heels for a woman who hated his guts.

kit was nothing but enthralled by the important guest of the evening. the royal family of the eastern kingdom, maelstrom, were a collection of tough looking people hardened by battles and a love for fighting. despite thinking they would be a family of scary hard asses, they had come bearing a multitude of gifts, the king constantly wearing a smile on his face as he was ecstatic to meet the legendary warrior turned queen sorsha.

and then there were the others. the royal family of winterhold, were a small family but carried a regal and powerful air about them. before eating the first course a noble guard had told her and jade some things about them, like how the family were known for being gracious but ruling with an iron fist. they had trampled many threats, people regularly mistaking their beautiful appearances for weakness.

and the princess of tir asleen had to admit she was guilty of the same thing. for the first hour she frequently catches the eye of a girl she’s never seen before from across the room. she can tell she’s an important person from the north, seen by her intricate hairstyle and the furs of her dress. every time you lock eyes you send her a little smile and she quickly turns her head away to avoid you.

she would feel guilty if a little while later when looking for jade who had wandered off she didn’t catch the both of you in the midst of conversation, jades sword in your hands as you admire the craftsmanship.

“it really is a beautiful weapon, jade. i’d love to see you use it in action, i’m sure you’re more than proficient with it.” kit listens to your conversation as she walks up behind the two of you, noticing how close you stand next to her knight.

“i don’t know how appropriate it would be for me to train in front of a visiting royal, but i’m sure i could pull some strings.“ jades head bows and tilts to yours, a sign kit recognizes as the red head being bashful. she doesn’t like how it makes her feel.

almost like you have a sixth sense you turn towards the princess, the quickness of it and your face being so close to hers throwing her off a bit.

“your highness, we finally meet. your companion here was just regaling me with the tale of your adventure and defeat of the crone. i have to admit im more than impressed.”

“it’s nice to meet you princess. i’m glad you’re warming up to us here. if you don’t mind, i’d like to talk to my close friend here. alone.”

“kit!” jade hissed, hoping you don’t take her partners words in the wrong way. but all you did was smile, bidding the two girls a good night and that you looked forward to seeing them later.

(jade wouldn’t admit that she thought jealousy was a rather cute look on the girl, especially later that night when the princess was moving like a woman starved to remove her clothing, staring at her body like she was going to tear her apart. she would let a little jealousy slide then.)

before the pair went to sleep jade decided to bring it up, not wanting the two them to go to sleep with any grudges or things left unsaid. it didn’t take much for kit to admit her feelings at the encounter she had with the foreign princess, but it did shock her when jade thought it was alright since she caught kit staring at you. a lot.

the next few days are now tense for a completely different reason. there is a mutual understanding between kit and jade that they both find you attractive, but they agree not to do anything about it in fear of freaking you out and jeopardizing the alliance. they swore to both be on their best behaviors'

but it was pretty damn hard to do so when it seemed like you were flirting with them often. the best example would be on the days that they sparred, you would frequently not be too far away as you watched the both of them with great interest. sometimes it would make one of them fumble, leading to the other to gain an advantage and win the round which always made you laugh before you left.

when it was clear that the two of them were going to keep dancing around whatever this was, you decided to take matters into your own hands. after careful observations you could tell what would attract each of the girls to you.

jade was more open to you after that first meeting. she was dedicated to the crown, although not as much as you would expect, but you could save that question for another day, and if you asked her for help with anything she would dutifully do as you requested. your favorite was asking her to show you some of her moves and attacks, praising her for her skills and what a talented warrior she was.

the warrior had a thing for praise - you realized when you complimented her for her strength after a simple self defense lesson ended up with you on the floor - could this get any better?

kit was a bit harder to crack for you. even with some careful questions and answers from jade, the brunette was still a bit standoffish when it came to you, most likely because you were flirting with her lover in front of her face and then flirted with her back after. but the clear internal battle in her was so intriguing to watch you couldn’t help but feed the flames.

since both of you were the heirs to your kingdoms and your mothers were still negotiating, the two of you spent quite a bit of time together inside the palace. granted most of it was spent in formal settings like meetings, dinners, et cetera. you could tell kit was constantly trying her hardest to be polite, but would sometimes let a sly remark slip through. you’re just glad they were directed at you under her breath; if you’re mother heard any disrespect targeted at you she’d most likely command her soldiers to attack at once.

but you were nothing if not persistent and determined. you would sometimes catch the way kit looked at jade, her pupils dilated and her lips bitten when the knight would stretch or show a sliver of the skin in her stomach. it was almost too easy to grab her attention when you started dressing in more traditional tir asleenian attire, swapping between tight pants to show off your figure or airy dresses with drooping necklines. they were drastically different from the garments from home, most of your clothes having fur and heavy fabrics.

you can still vividly picture the look on kit's face when you passed each other in the halls one morning, her eyes drawn like a magnet to the skin of your neck and the top of your cleavage in your pretty blouse. for added effect, you had worn one of those semi-corsets you'd seen the princess occasionally wearing. partly because you wanted her attention and partly because you thought they were cute.

besides trying to seduce the pair, they eventually became two people who you truly enjoyed being in your company. you were surprised at the leniency queen sorsha gave her children, the twins given free reign over the castle and the villages nearby. kit herself invited you once to join them in, lightly teasing you as for the first time she saw you nervous, scared of getting caught and having to face the wrath of your mother.

but one night it all became so, so worth it. a dark tavern, too much ale, and an off handed comment about how cute you found their not-so-secret relationship led to you three in a cramped rented room in a mix of kisses and tongues and limbs.

you had to admit you were thoroughly surprised by their dynamics in bed. when it came to training you noticed that whatever jade said to kit goes, the princess clearly having a deep affection and respect for the older girl. you would have thought that it would carry over into the bedroom and jade would be pinning kit to the bed, but when the three of you rush into the rented bedroom and kit pins jade's hands above her head you are exceptionally excited.

you sit yourself down on the bed, facing the tangled lovers while you slowly start to undress yourself. when you take off your top and your cloth bra, jade can't help but let out a moan at the feeling of one princess sucking and biting a mark into her neck and one exposing her breasts and smiling at her like a siren. she gets so overwhelmed when she feels kit's eager hand grasp her breath she has to push the girl by the shoulders, tilting her head to bring her attention to you.

now, you had had your fair share of trysts back home, easily able to find girls who had either wanted to experiment or just have one shot with the princess of winterhold. most of the time you had intercourse with girls you'd take on the more dominant role, be it because of the way some girls were inexperienced, some were just submissive at heart, and how you didnt think you enjoyed anything more than seeing pretty girls fall apart under you.

but as you and kit are almost violently fighting for dominance while she kissed you like she was almost insane, you're starting to think that duke's daughter you slept with a year ago who said "you're a control freak in court and it travels down into your sexual life." really was onto something.

you swore the brunette was about to give in, little moans escaping from her lips and her eyes rolling back into her head when you tug her hair to get access to her neck, but you suddenly get the wind knocked out of you when she's flipping you over and pressing you into the bed, your arms suddenly held above your head by jade as kit looks at you with a wild grin.

maybe you can be on the bottom, just this once.

except 'just that once' turned into a whole lot more than once. after that first night of passion and lust it seemed like the three of you couldnt keep your hands off of each other, taking any chance possible to sneak into a room or hidden broom closet to induldge in each other.

while you were able to change thins uo when you were with jade, a simple praise and brush across her neck turning the girl to putty in your arms. you had to be careful, though. once after another unneeded self defense lesson where she had beaten and pinned you in under a minute, one little "god, im so proud of you." led to her nearly humping you like a dog outside on the rocks.

but no matter what you did you still couldnt manage to dominate kit. youd be damning her to the high heavens if it didnt turn you on immensely on she could so quickly reduce you to a whimpering and begging mess.

it got to the point where you were daydreaming about her constantly. when you passed each other in the halls you shivered when her hand brushed against yours and it gave you the muscle memory of her lithe fingers curling and thrusting inside of you, when you were eating together your eyes focused on the movement of her mouth and how you could picture her mouthing at your cunt, or even how when you got the princess and jade tangled up after a spar you got so many ideas how badly you wanted your legs tangled with theirs as you felt your pleasure together.

they were actually driving you crazy. you, the heir of winterhold, fawning over a princess and her ptoector. if those girls back home could see you now they'd cackle.

the three of you werent as sneaky as you would have hoped though.

one night, kit had come to the two of you with a proposition and a package she had acquired, asking if you would like to try it out. jade had opened the package and the way her breathing stopped and eyes enlarged made you think there was actually a rabid wolf inside of the box, but instead she pulls out an object that is long and black and phallic. you’re a little embarrassed to even think of the flutter it starts in your chest.

"i think ill opt out, this once," you nervously squirm in your place. "gods, kit. where did you even get that? ive heard about these but ive never actually seen one."

"aw, are you scared?" kit pinches your shoulder and slightly winces when you do it to her wrist.

jade scoffs at the two of you before telling kit to stop teasing you, assuring you that you didnt have to do anything you didnt want to. gods, she was so sweet to you, always making sure you were comfortable with whatever was happening between the three of you. you just couldn't help yourself when kit was pounding the toy into her, her soft red curls resting on your lap as her big green eyes stared up at you. you could tell that your unmoving gaze on her face and the touch of your hands moving across her face, neck, and chest was not helping in her struggle to keep her noises at bay.

so when your fingers traveled to her breasts and squeezed her nipples, could you really blame yourself for the loud moan that came from her throat? it wasn't exactly your fault she was sensitive. although if it was up to her she would say you definitely knew what you were doing, especially when your fingers trailed down her torso and lightly grazed her clit just at the same moment kit roughly trusted her hips and hit the gooey spot deep inside of her.

looking back, it was only a matter of time until the three of you got caught.

only three days later both of your mothers asked you and kit to join them to a private tea. it wasn't odd for your mother to ask you to tea with her at home, but she hadn't called for you since you arrived in tir asleen. on the way kit had even told you her mother hated tea, and she couldn't recall a time in recent years when the two of them just sat in a room talking to each other without an argument starting.

when you entered the room you could immediately tell something was wrong. first, jade and erik were there; jade was supposed to have a rare day of rest today, and erik was...well, he wasn't often present at important conversations you had come to learn. second, your mother looked on edge. in all your years on earth, you had never seen her show any sign of weakness, the woman learning from a young age that being a ruler of an entire nation meant constantly being guarded. the sight of her being nervous put a sick feeling in your stomach.

"uh, mom? is something going on?" kit took a blunt approach before sitting down on the armchair across from her mother as you did the same. sorsha face looked tense but also a little judgy if you were reading her right.

sorsha raised her hand in a simple gesture and a timid-looking girl wearing a maid uniform came rushing from the corner of the room until she stood behind the sitting queen. you stared at her for a second until the realization hit you like a brick in the face. you never caught her name, but you knew she worked in the hallways surrounding kits room.

"this is moira, one of the new maids who works in the west wing," sorsha begins to explain as the maid in question can't meet your eyes, her eyes staring at her feet. "a few days ago she took the night shift for cleaning some of the floors and heard something quite peculiar coming from your room, kit."

"mom, i can explain-"

"no, kit, we would really like you to not explain." the queen's voiced raised as she quickly cut kit off, the girl's body going rigid beside yours. at this point you were the same, your mom's cold glare making you uncomfortable in your seat.

"although i'm slightly embarrassed at this situation, both because of the nature of it and how fast it seems to be spreading among the staff, queen morwine and i have come up with a proposed solution to this."

as soon as you heard this proposed (more like already decided) idea, for the two of you to get married in the following weeks, you think you blacked out for a few hours. and in hindsight that was horrifying. if there was anything your parents taught you it was to be composed, to be ready for anything at a moment's notice. but to be fair you'd never had to deal with an arranged marriage proposal before.

everything you could remember after it was said was a blur. you could remember kit yelling, obviously opposed to the idea of yet another arranged marriage, at the fact that she thought she had finally managed to finally convince her mother that she deserved the right to choose who she wanted to spend the rest of her life with and had proven she wasn't just a political pawn. even though you agreed with what she was saying, the malice in her voice from even just the idea of marrying you hurt.

jade was in an equal state of shock and only moved from her spot when you stumbled out of the room to the audible disapproval from your mother and rushed down the halls.

before you knew it you had run out of breath and settled on a log by a lake not far from the castle grounds. the sun was setting and there were fireflies out over the water. you could hear frogs croaking. it was nice. peaceful.

the knight gently rested a hand on your shoulder. "are you alright?"

you really didnt know how to answer the question.

"up north all of our lakes are frozen solid. the only time you see the water is when the ice is broken for ice sellers or a fool falls through on a dare that they can walk all the way across. i'd never even seen a fully melted one until we started to journey here," you breathe slowly and rub your hands up your arms, the night chill starting to take an effect. jade sits beside you and her natural warmth makes you feel a little better. "i care about you both, really, i do. but whatever this is has only just started and i...i don't know if I'm ready to give my whole life up for it."

the air goes quiet and the sun sets before she walks you back to your room, pausing outside of the door and taking your hand in hers and pressing a soft kiss to the back of your hand.

"i know this will be difficult but just...don't shut us out, please."

you could only give her a smile before you shut the door.

the next two weeks were tense.

sometimes when you were little you'd dream about your wedding, picturing a gorgeous girl waiting for you at the end of a beautiful altar and everything would be big and grand and snowy and perfect.

but now you're in a nation that's hot and filled with people you don't know but you're apparently about to rule over, and your gorgeous girl has been giving you the cold treatment ever since the news broke. you had tried cornering her in the halls, after sparring, even after dinner, but she always found a way to get around you and continue doing whatever the hell she was doing.

she wasn't talking to jade either, which slightly made you feel better because if she was you'd be feeling jealous, left a sour taste in your mouth at how she was shutting both of you out for no reason. one night jade had snuck extremely carefully into your room to bring you some snacks you'd been craving and had told you that the princess was just feeling a mix of betrayal, hurt, and worry all at the same time and wasn't the best at handling her emotions when she was upset.

if there was anything keeping you grounded at that time it was jade. she had to tread carefully so it didn't look like she was choosing sides between the two of you, but she always made sure to be there when you were slipping. one of the royal wedding planners was pressuring you to pick a flower to add to the bouquets that would be used to decorate the ceremony and the one you'd hold as you walked down the aisle, and just when you were on the brink on breaking down and just retreating to you room altogether jade stepped in for you and recommended a mix of your favorite flowers from your homeland and kits, signifying the union of your nations in a small but beautiful way.

and maybe having so much of her attention and still having to see kits stupid but cute upset face whenever she saw the two of you got to your head, because later that night you're sitting with jade by that same lake from a while ago and kissing her like your starving, pulling her closer by the back of her neck while your hips grind into hers like you'll die if you don't get closer to her. a few weeks ago you had all agreed to not leave too visible marks, but when you bite roughly on her collarbone and she pulls you closer by your hips, you don't really think she cares.

which is great for you, because when you walk with jade to drop her off at her training session and kit sees the mark on her skin her reaction is worth every bit of sadness you felt.

the night before your wedding was nice you would admit. there was a banquet with both families and a few dozen others, which gave you a crazy sense of deja vu, and you were able to somewhat enjoy yourself. your younger siblings were teasing you nonstop and some of the more vulgar court members were doing the same in a way that made you slightly uncomfortable, but nothing you hadn't heard before. it'd be made better if your bride-to-be wasn't glaring holes into the side of your head every so often, but you would take what you could get.

once the party has ended and an uncountable amount of people had wished you 'good luck's and 'congratulations'' for the following day, you trek back to your bedroom and decide to wind how with a nice warm bath and some scents a courier had brought from your home. just as you had poured the liquid into the water and sunk into the water, the gentle whoosh of the bathroom door opening and closing has your eyes widening and reaching for the closest thing you could as a weapon when your gaze lands on kit, standing at the door with her arms crossed and staring you down.

"if you don't mind, i'd like to spend my night alone and not with you leering at me while i do it."

"to be fair, its nothing i haven't seen before," she smirks and starts to walk closer to your bath, not being able to avoid you flicking water on her clothes. "this is serious, i want...i need to talk to you."

you can't help but scoff at her words. "oh, you need to talk to me? i wasn't really getting that from the past two weeks of silence and ignoring."

"i know, i get it, and im sorry-"

"that's not enough."

you close your eyes and focus on your breathing, not wanting a fight to start lest anyone hear it through the walls. you can hear the sound of kit's boots moving until they stop at the side of your tub, seeing the girl get on her knees before softly taking your hand and holding it over her heart.

"you're right, its not enough. i acted like a complete and utter dick to you and you didn't deserve it. i was so in my head about the wedding, and my mom and graydon and jade and you, that i shut both of you out when we all should have been with each other. and i swear I'm gonna spend the rest of our dumb married lives making it up to you."

you couldn't help but snort at her while she apologized, able to tell that she truly meant it. it was all just hitting you how much you missed her these past few weeks, how she was always trying to say something humourous to break your 'cold exterior'.

(she thought that joke was hilarious and neither you nor jade had the heart to tell her it was lame.)

"i forgive you, kit. and dont think for a second that im not going to hold you to that promise." you brought a hand up to sweep some hair away from her face, chuckling when she lightly tries to shake off the water your fingers left.

she looks at you so fondly before giving you a light kiss on your lips. but blame it one the faint traces of alcohol still in your system, or the low lighting of the bathroom, or just the sensitivity from opening up to each other, but the kiss quickly turns heated before you're both hurriedly rushing to remove her clothing before she's joining you in the bath, the both of you giggling as water sloshes on the ground and you nearly cackle when you see kits giant little toy below her hips.

"were you planning this? you expected me to forgive you as easily as i did?"

"no, but. a princess is always prepared."

luckily no loud noises were heard in the hallway (where jade happened to be standing outside of your bedroom door for both protection and assurance for kit), even though it took biting your lip until you thought it would bleed before kit took some pity on you before she manuevered your body to take you from behind, covering your mouth with her hand as your eyes roll to the back of your head.

once your high hits you with what feels like the power of a hundred stars, the girl carefully lifts you from the cold water and helps you dry off before leading you to lie down on your bed, where jade waits in the middle after assuring you all helpers on the night shift didn't come near your room out of respect or privacy.

you laid in between the two girls, jade in front of you and kit behind you as they snuggled into you and held hands across your waist. they whispered sweet words in the darkness of the room, promising each other that they wouldn't let this get in the way of their previous relationship, that they hoped to build a great life with you by their side, and that they couldn't wait to spend the rest of their lives with you.

you fell asleep dreaming of a white wedding in spring. you really enjoyed it.

when you woke up the two of them had already left to get ready for the wedding, as a handful of lady's maids came in to prepare you for the day. you were thankful they ignored how worn out you looked as they helped you to take another bath and do up your hair.

if there was one thing you loved most it was your dress. it was a traditional but gorgeous dress from your homeland, and you were glad your mother insisted on it being made exactly the way you had envisioned. she might have forced you into a marriage but she'd be damned if you didn't look exactly how you had always dreamed.

the preparation was over in what felt like a second, and before you knew it you were walking down the aisle. the renovated dining hall was ethereal, decorated in a combination of white and purples and blues and pinks and greens. winter meets spring.

regret was seeping into you for picking jade to be your maid of honor because seeing her stand across from kit makes you feel so nervous and sick and in love that you want to just turn around and take a breather for a few hours.

the vows arent long and once you give her a quick kiss it doesn't fully register in your mind that the two of you are actually married now. but it does feel different. like there's a new gravity to your relationship that wasn't there before that both terrifies and excites you.

the reception is lovely as well. compared to last night there are less inappropriate jokes and more genuine well-wishes for the two of you and what this marriage will do for both kingdoms.

the mention of your home would make your mouth twitch. you were starting to become truly happy here, but you would always miss winterhold.

after the food was served and some forms of entertainment were performing for the crown, your mother pulled you aside to talk. at this point, you hadn't talked to her in a few weeks, safe for required details about the wedding or basic pleasantries.

"i understand you're upset with me, and i know that i will have to earn your trust again. and i will do so no matter how long it takes. sorsha and i have been discussing establishing a safer and faster trade route between here and winterhold, maybe start establishing some new towns to people displaced by this crone madness. once its finished you can come back whenever you'd like. it will always be your home, no matter what."

you hugged her tighter than you ever had before.

after the toasts are made and the festivities of the night (which were very fun, you had to admit. you asked kit what gave some of the people such a love for fun and partying and she said it was something her dad brought out in people) are over you make your way to kits room and plop yourself down on the bed, kit and jade in tow and plopping down themselves. its quiet for a while. as they help you out of your wedding dress no words are said. nothing about how two of you are going to be queens once sorsha steps down, nothing about how jade has agreed to go visit her sister for a while to bond with her family and her people before coming back and seeing if there was any way to help them more, or how kit would most likely go on another adventure with boorman and the elora danan to help her father escape from wherever he was.

all you could focus on was the two girls who you cared about more than anything and being surrounded by them as you fell asleep, knowing that whatever new surprises that came in the future you would face.

together.

i love them a lot is it obvious. the bath scene was inspired by a p0rn video i saw on twitter but then i remembered they didn't have showers in that time period :( i didn't realize until the end that i barely talked about boorman elora and willow... ok bye bye

#willow #willow series #kit #jade #kit tanthalos #jade claymore #tanthamore #tanthamore x reader #kit tanthalos x reader #jade claymore x reader #poly #poly fic

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headcanons-n-shit · 5 months

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Hello

Your newest post reminded me i had an idea. The bois comforting wol who is having a nervous brakedown from all the stress. Bonus Ardbert.

I really like your stories. Especially the angsty ones.

(TAZ The Breakdown plays in the background)

(Mild shadowbringers spoilers)

Thancred literally (accidentally but still) disassociated so hard from the stress that he gave up his body to the bad guy for a bit. If anyone gets what youre going through, its probably going to be him. Hes not going to waste his time on empty platitudes: hes going to get you a glass of water, a warm blanket, and a hot meal, and let you cry it out on his shoulder for as long as you need to.

(And if that still doesnt help, well. Sex is still on the table. Its rarely a good idea, but hes all out of those.)

Urianger is probably breaking down with you lets be real. Every future my mans has ever read has included world-ending catastrophe, and, sure, youve thwarted it every time (usually with his help) but. What if this time you dont? What if this time you fail???? Its an unreasonable amount of stress for one man to be carrying. He probably does a fantastic amount of fantasy weed to cope and still all it takes is seeing you break down for him to also start blubber-crying.

Graha seems kind of detached and distant at first. "Shower water food" he commands you, in the voice of Lynas grandfather the Crystal Exarch, firm and uncompromising and impossible to disobey, and you might miss the way his voice and smile are strained. The way his hands clench and unclench at his sides. Hes never regretted turning back time to help you save two worlds, but. Its times like this that he wonders if he shouldnt try again to give you a happier ending.

Estinien is a firm hand on your shoulder, a steady shoulder to lean on, because he gets it. The feeling of being trapped in your own body, puppetted by powers so much greater than you can imagine, almost greater than you can comprehend... Youre breaking down for the both of you, honestly, because hes spent so long training the iron discipline to resist nidhoggs influence that he doesnt know how to anymore. This is. Cathartic. For the both of you tbh.

Aymeric wishes in this moment, more than anything, that he could just. Just be with you. Out on your journeys, giving you support by your side instead of from a distance. And he knows, he knows, that the support he gives you is important, that his ability to move nations in your favor has helped far more than any single sword at your side ever would. But he bears the weight of a nation while you bear the weight of a star, and that just. Doesnt seem fair to him.

Haurchefant knows that theres some things that hot chocolate cant fix but. Its a good starting place if nothing else. Something warm and sweet right now couldnt hurt, neither would a soft blanket and a roaring fire. He'll sit with you, bundled up together, and just listen if thats what you need. Or he can talk-- he has plenty of embarrassing stories about Artoirel that he hasnt shared yet. Either way, he'll happily help you wipe your tears away when youre done, and then drop a delicate kiss on your forehead.

Stand tall, he says. A smile better suits a hero.

Sidurgu is surprisingly good at this. Or, maybe not so surprising? Rielle is very mature for her age, but shes still a child. He probably does this whole song and dance every other week. And you feel a little bit like a child, the way he bullies you into the shower and then bundles you up in blankets and pushes food at you, but. Beneath the gruff words and scowl you can tell hes worried. Frustrated. This is exactly the kind of injustice that as a dark knight he swore he would fight, but hes just one man, there isnt much he can do about the desolation of the star. But he also needs you to know that he'll always be in your corner. Whether in this little way or if you need him to help you kill a god, he'll always come when you call.

BONUS

Ardbert has never felt so helpless in his life. He cant touch you, cant be a shoulder you can cry on. He cant even fetch you a glass of water. All he can do is stand there and watch as you break apart in your bed in the Pendants, and its. Its torture, worse than anything any ascian could ever conceive.

Still. He does what he can. And if all he can do is sit at your bedside, his hand hovering half-through yours in a mockery of touch while he tells you stories of his adventures, or friendship and triumph and happier times, well. Its the least he can do.

#ff14 #ff14 headcanons #thancred waters #wolcred #urianger augurelt #wolianger #graha tia #grahawol #estinien varlineau #estinien wyrmblood #wolstinien #aymeric de borel #wolmeric #haurchefant greystone #haurchewol #sidurgu orl #sidwol #ff14 ardbert #wolbert

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eirian · 2 months

Text

got into a convo in a server abt how one negative comment on an artist's work (especially a young/beginner one) can completely change the trajectory of their artistic journey which may even mean ending it, and i remembered something that happened to me as a young artist

back in my deviantart days (like around 2009/2010 i believe this happened), i had a set of ocs that were edgy sheep and they were part of a story called "dark brotherhood". i was really excited about them and wanted to make them into a comic series, so i whipped out ms paint and made some pages and shared them on my page

unfortunately someone didnt like my comic to the point of where they openly called it stupid and silly because they were sheep and the art wasnt amazing. and that really discouraged me a lot. so i ended up taking down the pages and completely abandoning the project. on top of that, i changed the characters from sheep to wolves bc i thought wolves were more appealing to people and theyd think they were cooler than sheep.

since then ive lost those old pages due to a computer crash (i lost a whole lot of stuff i wish i could get back but thats impossible at this point..) and ive reverted the characters back to sheep to honor my young self's vision, but i'll never forget what one comment did to my creative vision and self esteem, and it makes me so very conscious of how i treat other artists' work, and it makes me feel for young/beginner artists or artists who arent that far along in their journey compared to others, who all get negative feedback on their work to the point of changing how they do things for the sake of being liked

anyway. be nice to young/beginner artists, or even just artists whose styles u dont personally find appealing. if you say something negative without them asking for it at the very least, you could be the reason an artist stops following their passion.

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islandofsages · 3 months

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darling heart.

summary: in which you are someone who participates in/identifies with jirai kei culture.

characters: heartslabyul boys x gn reader

tags: relationship not specified, fluff, imagines format

warnings: mentions of mental health, mentions of self-destructive tendencies

author's notes: hiiii this is very self-indulgent bc i am a jirai kei babe,, im specifically a jirai danshi <3 i might do for other dorms too, depending on my motivation lol you can find out more by searching up jirai kei tho dont just read the jfashion wiki for it, it's more than just a fashion style. also beware of potentially triggering stuff since it deals with mental health and all

Riddle Rosehearts

He’s intrigued by this subculture that you participate in and he’d ask you more about it, if you don't mind telling him - he’ll do his own research too anyway

When he finds out it's basically a subculture consisting of people with emotion dysregulation issues and is generally controversial, he checks up on you and asks you if you're okay or not

You laugh then – you’ve had your ups and downs but really, so has everyone. You hope reading about it hasn't scared him off

He’d feel like calling you a “landmine type” is too insensitive but you assure him that there's nothing to worry about and that people who participate in the subculture has reclaimed such stereotypes and fully embrace it

He’d really enjoy seeing you decked out in jirai kei fashion; he may want to try it himself but he’d insist that it's not in his place to participate, only support from the sidelines

You do get him to try out clothes that are similar to or inspired by the culture though – he seems to be comfortable in the style and you're happy that something that you enjoy can also bring the same joy to him

You’ll also recommend some songs to him, especially ones that you think would help him in studying despite the sometimes concerning lyrical content

If someone tries to bully you for identifying with the subculture, he’d step in immediately and defend your honor

“What right do you have in deciding what (Y/N) identifies with? That's what I thought. I’m always in the right.”

Through your downs and ups, Riddle will always be there for you.

Ace Trappola

He has heard of it before but he thought it was only a type of fashion, not a whole subculture with more substance to it than clothes

You’d infodump to him all about it and your journey with it, whether you just discovered it or have been identifying with it for a long time – he listens to you curiously all the while

He’s caught off guard for a moment by the more controversial and depressing part of it but he quickly recovers

He’s happy for you and glad that you’re comfortable having such a culture define a part of you

Though he implores not to do all the self-destructive stuff if you could and he’ll look out for you more just in case

He definitely thinks you rock while wearing your jirai kei outfits; it’s not his style but he wouldn’t mind trying it once, just to get a feel for the style

“Yeah, this is definitely not my thing… you, on the other hand, look pretty awesome.”

You’d give him a link for your playlist (or a playlist you’ve saved) and he’d listen to it when he’s bored – ends up adding a few songs to his personal playlist

If he finds anyone stereotyping you unnecessarily, he’ll call them out, saying as if they’re any better

Despite everything, you are still uniquely you in his eyes.

Deuce Spade

He apologizes for not knowing too much about it when you bring it up and you tell him it’s okay because it gives you an excuse to ramble about it

You tell him what it entails and how you’ve come to find out about it, sifting through your past experiences both good and bad

He tries very hard to be understanding, even if he doesn’t really get it. You’re just grateful to have his support

“I don’t really get it but it gives you a sense of community, right? I think that’s pretty cool!”

He’s also a little concerned about the mental illness part so he’d regularly check up on you to make sure you’re doing okay

He’d ask you to tell him more about your experiences with the subculture if you have any more and if anything exciting happens, you go to him first

Such as acquiring a brand new article of jirai kei clothing for example! He thinks the style is super pretty and fits you really, really well

He’d listen to the music together with you, sharing earphones and all – maybe he would even listen to them while he tries to do anything

He’ll be your guard dog and bite back whoever dares to make fun of you for being part of the subculture’s community you’ll have to calm him down sometimes

You couldn’t ask for a better cheerleader than him.

Cater Diamond

He’s always known about the subculture and although he doesn't participate in it, he thinks it's really neat

You tell him more about it and about the misconceptions people have about it so that he doesn't misunderstand

He’s super stoked that he knows someone in real life who actually participates in the subculture since he gets to see how it actually is in reality

He mostly knows about the fashion and when you come rocking up to him wearing the classic jirai kei look, he tries his best not to fanboy

He compliments you then proceeds to ask you where you got it – though cute styles like it aren’t his thing, he feels like he can give this style a try

He’d match with you on days he doesn’t feel too uncomfortable with more cutesy styles and snap pictures of you two to post on Magicam

He’d also go scouring for the music online to add more songs to his already rapidly growing playlist. He’d share some recommendations with you too!

Unintentionally got you more jirai kei friends since some people saw his posts about matching with you on Magicam; even people you already know commented on his post

“Look at us, (Y/N)! We’re totally Magicam-famous now~”

You laugh with him, head thrown back while the seeds of your relationship bloom behind where the two of you sit.

Trey Clover

He doesn’t know too much about it so he’ll ask you to explain to him what it is – to which you excitedly agree to

You tell him everything from the origins to how you’ve come to participate in the subculture – he nods patiently all the while

The mental health part of it has him questioning you a bit but he has no ill intention, he’s simply looking out for you and is worried about you

He’s supportive all the way and thinks it’s nice that you have something you’re passionate about. He’d even do his own research when he has the time

He’s pleasantly surprised when you show up wearing jirai kei fashion one day; he definitely thinks you look striking in the get-up

He wouldn’t mind going with you if you were to shop for more jirai kei-related things – he would joke you’ll have to repay by helping him out another time though

He’ll listen to your song recommendations and if he likes them enough, he’d listen to them while he’s in the kitchen. He likes that they remind him of you

“Oh, this one’s pretty catchy. …These lyrics though…”

Going places with you certainly catches attention sometimes but he doesn’t mind, as long as you’re happy and comfortable in your own skin

His name truly defines him – you sure feel lucky to have him in your life.

#twst #twisted wonderland #twst x reader #twisted wonderland x reader #platonic twst x reader #platonic twisted wonderland x reader #riddle rosehearts #riddle rosehearts x reader #ace trappola #ace trappola x reader #deuce spade #deuce spade x reader #cater diamond #cater diamond x reader #trey clover #trey clover x reader

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effieandtim · 4 months

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I loved every single one of the Lucy/Tim's scenes in this show, but particularly that last one. Because for Lucy this has always been a competition with Tim, like how couldn't it not? But for Tim...it hasn't been in a very long time. For him it was over when he realized it was going to be a competition with a kid, and unless you are an asshole, you let it go after that. Which is something Tim did. Kids should always come first, and Tim realized that, and kept reminding Hawk even when he forgot. But also this is the tragedy of this story. Because Tim in letting Hawk go, was able to form a life of his own where Hawk wasn't in it. He found passion in other things, he found a balance in his life. He still loved him, but it was different. He was able to kind of move on, in a way that Hawk wasn't. Hawk instead was never able to move on. Like what he did should have been enough, but it wasn't. He kept wanting Tim back, kept dreaming of something that wasn't possible anymore. He never had that true moment of letting Tim go. And when he finally was able to accept himself and be with Tim...it was too late, not only because of AIDS, but because Tim himself wasn't that boy who lived for love anymore. He had a purpose now, that didn't include Hawk, and doing that was more important than dying in his lover's arms.

i had typed a whole long response to this and then this fucking app updated and i lost the draft😭😭

anyway I LOVE THIS OMG

i agree with everything you said and i love how beautifully you have put this across

that scene with baby jackson and tim i feel was the turning point in tim’s journey - and i dont know if you have watched the new interview with jonathan and matt, but jonny spoke about this scene in there and yeah, i think that tim saw the innocent life in front of him and realised that he had to let hawk go bc this wasnt something he could ever be a part of, and he understood why and for whom hawk did what he did.

he may not have forgiven hawk but he understood

from that point onwards tim only grew and moved on in his journey - he stopped occasionally for hawk but he never actually stopped growing or moving ahead in his growth

on the other hand hawk never really changed from the 50s did he. he ofc matured with age and everything bc hes human after all but he still was at the same or not far off from the point we find him in 50s in terms of thinking and personality etc

what triggers hawk to change is tims illness i think and ofc that beautiful love confession - but ofc it was too late. it’s bittersweet that hawk did change and accepted himsef but it took tim’s death for it to happen

but i agree that even if hawk had changed without that trigger and tim wasnt ill, its possible that they wouldnt have ended up together - thats the tragedy of their story i agree. they grew as two people who loved each other immensely but more importantly they grew as individuals

again, not to say that tim ever stopped loving hawk but as is the theme of the show, sometimes love is just not enough.

#anons #fellow travelers #jonathan bailey #tim laughlin #hawkins fuller #matt bomer

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batw1nggg · 22 days

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hi!! odd request could you explain why komahina isnt toxic

IVE BEEN MEANING TO MAKE A POST ABOUT THIS ANON !!!! u read my mind ….. so the reason why i dont consider komahina to be true and real toxic yaoi is because theyre intended to be mutually healing for each other.

their main, striking similarity is their upholding of danganronpa’s harmful societal values on talent. a theme throughout their interactions is komaeda explicitly stating a subconscious belief hajime has and then hajime denying that there’s any similarities in their belief system — everything komaeda says about the inferiority of the talentless is something hajime has always believed, just in a less self aware way. they both end up essentially killing themselves (komaeda in a more literal manner, hajime with the kamukura project) to become something bigger, something worth being called the ultimate hope, because they believe their talent status gives their life no meaning and they feel they have to “make up” for it. theyve always been similar; one sees the other in the things he hates about himself.

this is why, when they fall in love, it’s so groundbreaking for their respective arcs. in realizing the similarities in their belief system, hajime becomes more self aware about how stupid his insecurities are. hajime is able to break komaedas worldview by being talentless and inspiring hope/being an equal to his talented peers from 77b, and this makes komaeda realize that, because they are so similar, HE can do that too (side note makoto does this first when he kills junko, but komaeda knows hajime personally/saw hajimes development play out firsthand so its more effective). they feed into each other’s development and are able to grow from it.

they’re not really framed with much toxicity, and you can especially see this with allllll the visual parallels theyre given by the end of the anime. the juxtaposition of hajime grabbing komaedas junko arm to help him out of the pod and hajime grabbing komaedas prosthetic arm to help him onto the boat (paired with the line “let’s set off, in the name of hope”) symbolizes how interconnected hajime is to komaeda’s arc — his journey from old arm to new arm, from despair to hope to future. (and then theres the scene where hajime ditches ghost chiaki for komaeda too. and u see them eating with each other in the credits.) if they were intended to be toxic, they wouldnt have ended on that note.

and THENNNN theres also the fact that hajime’s really the only person capable of loving komaeda, in the beginning. hajime cant get struck down by komaedas luck, because hajimes the only one with ult luck powerful enough to counter komaedas. their lucks cancelling each other out is a concept stressed by the anime with the kamukoma gun scene. he’s also the only person with the guts to put in the effort to UNDERSTAND komaeda, a concept stressed in komaedas FTEs. hes the first person that physically can, and the first person thats made the effort. this is groundbreaking for komaeda.

theyre not toxic, they just go through a little angst period that ends up being resolved in the end. hajimes confusion towards komaeda and komaedas confusion towards hajime was necessary, they HAD to figure each other out because in doing that they learn something about THEMSELVES. that process comes with some angsting that is often mistaken for toxicity. of course they cant start dating mid killing game, THAT would have be pretty toxic, because a killing game is not a breeding ground for romance. this is why komahina never canonically starts dating - the time frame doesnt cover enough time for that. but they get two love confessions and the whole first fte is explicitly romantic.

#komahina #long post #i hope i collected my thoughts coherently. if i missed anything feel free 2 add on komahina nation

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gizkasparadise · 4 months

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final leg of a journey to love thoughts!! (eps 35-40). this got so gd long so under a cut it goes. spoilers, of course:

PLOT STUFF/PACING

pacing for the plot definitely got shredded in the last chunk, which is a damn shame because otherwise i've been finding the pacing pretty much perfect. eps 35-37 in particular felt like they could have been like a 10 episode arc. ep 38, which mostly dealt with wu palace politics, should have been cut or streamlined imo and more time given to the characters we've actually been riding along with the whole story. by the time we get back to the pregnant empress, prince danyang, the first prince whose name i dont even remember, and the prime minister, i do not care about any of them and i think this subplot was simply just trying to fit too much shit into one bag

that said, this show still let the emotional moments hit and breathe and linger. i love the grief for the fallen liudao comrades as we go, as well as the less heavy but still emotionally important moments like yang ying and tongguan bonding over their upbringing. and we got a wedding /;3;/!!! for this show, the relationships and characters matter more than the storyline so im not mad about anything at all

side note: it's so gd millennial to have a story about a bunch of 30 something year olds who want to fake their deaths and retire into obscurity but instead they go and die for a boss they hate

CHARACTER STUFF

this show consistently brought a lot of depth to its side characters (and side side characters!!). i said it in an earlier post, but it bears repeating that even someone like deng hui i didnt expect anything from, but he got such good development and writing that he became a stealth fave. his dying words essentially being "dude, quit fucking around" ? iconic.

i didnt like tongguan as much as everyone else, so im pretty meh about everything regarding him. the attempt to force-wed ruyi was tonally really weird and didnt make sense (i assume there was some cuts made surrounding it). but LOL at him reusing all the outfits and decor immediately for his wedding to yang ying. baby duke, you tacky motherfucker. i ultimately think yang ying deserves better than him, but the good thing is that she knows this, so she'll be able to hold her own and then some entering into this partnership

shisan really was the heart in a lot of ways--the mom to yuanzhou's dad for the liudao. i was not expecting him to break my heart the way he did, but the fact that he held both qian zhao and sun lang as they died and then tried his best to remove yuan lu from harm and saved chu yue and was just very much a nurturer all the way through got me. his character couldve been cheap comic relief but the writing + performance really elevated him into one of the (imo) most memorable wuxia characters. his line wondering who would get to behead his beautiful skull!!! and how his mantra was always that he was going to drink the best wine, see the most beautiful women, and make the best of friends and he dies having lost the ability to see and having just had wine in memory of qian zhao, yuan lu, and sun lang. like. shut up!!

ruyi and yuanzhou were both so great and they're gonna be the drama OTP to beat forever. i loved the gender reversals, that they both were so respectful of each other, and that they also felt very mature in how they handled things and communicated. they were really interesting characters both together and apart and that's always a win-win. they had a schroedinger's ending where it's not super clear if they're alive or dead (i interpreted it as the latter), but what's kind of beautiful is that either option is satisfying to me. if they both died, they're reunited and with their comrades and the story is truly about the journey and the meaningful short connections we have. if they both survived, it's a bookend with the beginning where they each faked their deaths to escape. A+

COSTUMING

i gotta just separately mention the costuming for this show because it was 15/10. the textures, shisan's accessories, the way red became integrated with yuanzhou's wardrobe and blue with ruyi's. the details on the liudao name amulets!! SO GOOD. i love when characters' clothes tell a story on their own

overall i just really loved this drama it is probably my favorite wuxia ive seen so far! it's gonna be in my brain for awhile lol feel free to send fic prompts if you've made it this far :'D

#a journey to love #cdrama

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glux2 · 5 months

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Musing: Emotional connection

Recently a very close person to me suggested i binge watch "Angel Hare", before that day my only exposure to that project was a fan game that had a very funny punchline in lampooning the "cursed videogame" genre.

So i watched the whole thing and it was great.

This scene right here made me feel more feelings than most of the media i have watched/played/read in like the last 5 years or so.

So it made my mind wonder, like, "hold on, when was the last time i felt this strongly about a piece of entertainment?"

Sure, if you know me, i felt strongly about the ongoing plotline for Noelle on Deltarune, so one would think "2021 when chapter two came out", right? but no, i got very invested but it wasn't it.

The last time i felt so strongly about a piece of media was actually Deltarune's predecesor, Undertale in 2015.

I finished Undertale in tears, i got in a very bad funk when i found out about the genocide ending, it truly made me feel emotions.

So i began to ponder, just what really moves me?

Full disclosure: I don't cry at movies. This is not a "look at me i am a badass who is not beheld by feelings" statement, no, i kinda just dont connect emotionally with movies as easily as other people.

I have talked about this, many times actually, Toy Story 3 did not make me cry, it always bothers me how people at the time were like "if TS3 didn't make you cry, you have no soul" and shit like that, so let me repeat something i have said many times before:

Toy Story 3 was a movie i went to see the day doctors had informed me my mother had entered terminal phase of cancer.

My friends took me to see TS3 when i felt the greatest sadness i have ever felt in my entire life. And im glad TS3 was a pretty funny movie that managed to distract me from what i was going through. TS3 uplifted me when i had a very real reason to cry.

So what im getting at is, i rarely connect emotionally with what conventionally makes people emotionally connected, not that i havent felt strong emotions from movies, but as we'll get to later, it's just not the stuff you would expect, when we get back to movies you'll be thinking, "what the fuck, Toy story 3 did not make you emotional but THIS THING DID?!"

So, if traditional "emotional things" rarely have moved me i began to think to myself, "what are things that have made me feel this strongly?"

I realized it's the damn weirdest things.

I'll try to list things that i can remember making me feel this emotional.

Now i'll be upfront, im not a very cultured person, so you'll notice most of this is...not very high brow.

Also, obviously spoilers for all this stuff im about to talk about.

Before we begin: Honorable mention goes to me finding out i had repressed memories of being traumatized as a kid by being show an animated adaptation of "Pilgrim's progress" by an aunt, which disturbed me greatly towards the end as the main character dies and before it the souls of two people he met are condemned to eternal damnation from making MISTAKES, not sins, not evil, but THE FUCKING MISTAKE of exploring alternate routes before them.

-Yoshi's Island, 1994 When i was a wee one Yoshi was one of my fave videogame characters, so of course i was beyond hype when a game where you play as yoshi came out, the ending is one of the greatest moments in videogame history, the beautiful music, the journey of the stork, and finally the classic Mario fan fare playing as baby mario and baby luigi being held by their parents with the words "Heroes are born", it's such a powerful moment. To this day i still cannot listen to that credits music without tearing up.

Sequel? Retcon?! I DON'T KNOW WHAT YOU ARE TALKING ABOUT, SHUT UP, THIS IS THE PERFECT ENDING AND NOTHING ELSE HAPPENED AFTER IT!

-The bicentennial man, 1999 The bicentennial man is one of the biggest examples of a movie being fucking mischaracterized in the marketing, this movie is based on Isaac Asimov's short story and later novel, it stars Robin Williams, so all marketing was presenting the movie as Robin Williams comedy movie, IT. IS. NOT. The bicentennial man is a scifi drama about the existential search for meaning and the nature of what truly is to be alive. You get invested on the quest of this robot trying to find humanity for 200 years, and the punchline to this movie is, in his quest for humanity he forgoes the immortality being a machine provides him as he had developed the way to turn himself biological, still artificial but biological, and he dies peacefully on his sleep before he can be told that humanity had declared him, legally, a human being. To me it was such a powerful moment, he found true meaning to his life, became human, yet died before knowing so.

-Courage the cowardly dog, "The Mask", 2002 This is a legendary episode of an already great show that has a lot of very good emotional moments, some may cite episodes like "the giving tree" or "the last star maker", but for me it's this one. For those who have never experienced this episode, it revolves around a cat girl named Kitty who one day shows up at Courage's farm and she's wearing an upsetting mask, she abuses courage because she believes all dogs are bad. The mask serves 2 purposes, one is metaphorical, "her inability to face reality", the second is to hide her identity as she believes she is in danger. The thing is, she is on the run because her lover best friend Bunny is trapped in an abusive relationship with a gangster dog who threatened to kill her if she was seen near Bunny ever again, the episode coats the whole situation with a ton of goofiness, but it's actually very fucking dark: A young lesbian is trapped against her will on an abusive relationship with a toxic, violent man who threatened to kill her girlfriend if she refused to date him. Courage, being a good little dog ventures to save Bunny and have her reunite with Kitty because, despite how bad Kitty was to him, he recognizes that Kitty is a victim and she and Bunny deserve better, leading to Courage letting them escape away together, to live happy and free. I don't think it's just me, but the final image of Kitty and Bunny hugging as the train takes them to freedom felt so powerful to me.

-Twisted Metal Head-on, 2002 This is one of the weirdest things i have ever gotten emotionally invested, but honestly? i love when some shitposting franchise suddenly manages to pull this off, specially given the set up for this whole thing im going to describe starts in an early game as a fucking joke. So to contextualize this, the first two Twisted metal games were helmed by the og creators of the franchise, TM 3, 4 and small brawl were made by different developers when the creators lost the rights, but during the PS2 era when the og developers came back and created TM: Black, and TM: Head-on, Black was a reboot, Head-on was a retcon sequel to TM 2 that eliminated TM3 from the timeline, but not TM 4. Still with me? Okay so TM2 had this character, Krista Sparks, who was the revealed to be the daughter of the main antagonist of the game, Calypso, but hold on? wasn't Calypso's backstory that his family died in a tragic accident which lead him to become evil? So turns out, the FBI retrieved his daughter's corpse, turned it into a robot with a bomb with the intend to make her get close to Calypso and blow him up. The ending ends comically with a message reading "The FBI wishes to thank you for putting an end to Twisted metal". Stil Still with me?!?!?! ok! so Head on! In this game Krista is back, as a ghost, her ending consists on her confronting her dad, who has now brought up so much pain, misery and death to the world, Calypso tries to explain that the nature of his powers mean he has to do this otherwise he cannot use his powers, and his plan was for Krista to win so he could bring her back and her mom to life, but Krista is so horrified with what has happened that she refuses and blurts "I wish the accident that killed me and mom never happened" the intention being impeding Calypso from becoming this evil super natural villian, but as per all endings, it's always a monkey paw affair and Calypso knows it, looking saddened he grants the wish because he has no option, his powers force him to. Briefly Krista has a vision of her childhood with her dad before he became evil as they share a sweet moment playing on a swing set. HARD CUT TO A HOSPITAL, Krista is on a bed in coma, Calypso is there and whispers to her something along the lines of "Sleep tight my dear, may you finally find peace", as Calypso is leaving the hospital you can hear 2 doctors talking, mentioning that Krista had been in coma for more than a decade and apparently Calypso just had found out. Excuse me Twisted Metal, but WHAT THE FUCK? You are a dumb fucking edgy car combat game, how dare you make me feel these things?

-Mother 3, 2006 (translation on 2008) Mother 3 hopefully needs no introduction, or maybe it does, because many people have reduced it to a joke due to how nintendo stubbornly refuses to give us an official release, but also many of you must know this franchise is the spark that ignited the flame of the absolute Juggernaut Undertale would become, as well as many other games influenced by it. The Mother/Earthbound games were known for being quirky and deviating from the standard conventions of the game, notably for the modern day setting and unorthodox choices of how you deal with the villians, they were always billed as emotional, but i feel they did not live up to that...until 3. The general narrative to Mother 3 is about how greed is destroying the world, the main villian corrupting what we see of the world (a paradise little town where everybody is nice) by introducing luxury, money and status....and also stomping everything with his fascist army and cyborg mutants. Mother 3 is a game about how the worst traits of humanity are destroying the world and upsetting nature. Mother 3 is also the story of 2 twin brothers who suffer tragedy after tragedy after tragedy that ultimately pits them one against the other with the fate of the world at stake. Mother 3 punches you almost immediately by killing the mother character (which i might mention you're encouraged to name after your own mother) at the end of the first chapter and how this affects her surviving family. one of the Twins, Claus, is so disturbed that he decides to on on his own to try to kill the monster that took his mom, while the other, Lucas, was too afraid and weak to stop his brother, resulting on Claus dying as well...but the badguys take his corpse and reanimate it into a cold, emotionless cyborg who follow's the big bad's order and is using him to try to cause the end of the world. In the climax of the story Lucas is force to confront Claus, clause is a brain washed cyborg, his master is out of the picture and all he can do is fight, you can't reason with him...and then.... Lucas and Claus begin to hear a voice, a familiar voice, it's their mother, reaching for them from beyond the grave, pleading for them to stop fighting, suddenly Lucas and Claus both have a flash back to when they were babies, overhearing their parents talk about the hopes they have for them, the many things they will be able to achieve together, this makes Clause snap out of his brain washing, removing the helmet that had been hiding his face since he was resurrected, Lucas and him have a moment as they are finally reunited, Claus realizes all the bad things he has done while under control of the bad guy and realizes he must atone for his crimes, he prepares a lightning attack he knows cannot hurt Lucas and cause HIM to die. "Im sorry for all the problems i caused" he says as he is dying on his dad's arm, "I must go to where mom is now", as he passes away he can hear his mother calling for him, "You just be so tired" she says. Now i know it will sound insane for people to hear a videogame of all things can make one so emotional, but damn, just recollecting these scenes for this dumb post has made me start to cry, the emotional punch of this scene is very strong, it demolished me when i played the game back in the day, but now? After my own mother passed away? I have been scared of playing this game again. I mot sure if im emotionally prepare to go though that again, even 10+ years later. That's how powerful this scene was to me.

-Elite Beat Agents, 2007 If you have played this game, you know were im going, for those who dont, EBA is a silly rhythm game about secret agent cheer leaders that are dispatched around the world to help people in need by raising their spirit and allow them to overcome adversity, the game is insanely wacky and have scenarios like helping a ninja car salesman prevent a company from stealing his company's secrets, helping a washed up baseball star fight a lava spitting golem rampaging on an amusement park and traveling back in time to help davinci paint the mona lisa. EBA is also the second game in the Ouendan series, and there is something you need to know about this series: They all include tearjerker levels to contrast with all the goofiness. "A christmas Wish" is a christmas themed level set to Chicago's "You are the inspiration" and the story to this level is positively DEVASTATING: A few months before christmas a business man tells his daughter and wife he has to go on a business trip but he promises he'll be back just in time for christmas, the girl asks him to bring back a "girlfriend" for her teddy bear. The father dies on a plane crash. When the mother breaks the news to the little girl she gets angry, crying to the skies that her dad promised he would be back for christmas. The backdrop of the stage is set the girl and the mom doing things to remember the dad, like looking through a photo album and baking a cake for his birthday, it's very sweet, but...this is EBA, if you're doing poorly you see the "bad" versions of these scenes, and in this one, one is very devastating, the little girl is having a dream where she's chasing the spirit of her dad, if you're doing well she calls for him and for a brief moment the dad stops and starts turning towards her, if you're doing bad the spirit fades away and the girl wakes up in tears. Dear goodness. But of course, if you beat the level you get this sequence of the ghost of the dad showing up on chrismas morning to fullfil his promise, giving the little girl the teddy bear he promised and having the chance to say good bye to his family.

This punches you really fucking hard in the gut. I am incapable of doing this level without ending in tears. For a time i could not even listen to this song without tearing up until, i shit you now, the deadpool movie used it on a comedy scene.

-Punch out!!, 2009 This one is one i know got me because of personal nostalgia, when i was a wee one the og NES punch out was a big part of my childhood, Punch Out!! on the wii was a masterfully crafted tribute to the franchise. To not dwell too much time on this, this game has an interesting quirk, the ending is a downer ending and it's the only ending you can get. After you beat the last opponent there is a sequence where Mac and Doc seemingly are having a disagreement, where Mac seemingly has decided that if he loses 3 times, he'll retire from boxing completely. After this you face randomly opponents from the game, the first time you lose in this mode you lose your champion title, after three loses, it's game over and the story mode becomes locked for that save file. The final cutscene is Doc walking through what seems to be a gallery with boxing memorabilia, and untold number of years later, he is alone, he spots his old bike on this gallery and rings the bell, he looks up and speak to an absent Mac, "Good job son, good job", as he leaves the camera pans to reveal he was looking at a framed photo of him and Mac on one of their training sessions. The music on this sequence is so perfect, and it was aimed at people like me, people who grew up with the franchise, the idea was making it feel like Doc was reminiscing of YOUR time with punch out when you were a kid, and to make you think about how far YOU have come since the first time you played the games in an arcade, or your nes, or snes. It's actually pretty effective and it got me.

-Regular Show, "Trucker Hall of Fame", 2012 What makes this one different from others instances of me making me emotional, it's, much like the "Angel Hare" example at the top, this one is all about WARM HAPPY FEELINGS, so for those who did not watch this episode, let me summarize it for you: One day Muscleman gets word that his dad, who was his personal hero, has passed away, and he's tasked with carrying his final wish, spread his [hat's] ashes in a place called "Trucker hall of fame", you see, Muscleman was lead to believe his dad was a legendary trucker and that earned him his admiration, but during the episode Muscleman finds out he was lied to, his dad was a forklift driver that the truckers belittled, altho feeling cheated for having been lied to he carries on with his father's wishes. Now because this is regular show, when they arrive at the trucker's hall of fame they are immediately attacked by ghost trucker for "desecrating the hall of fame" as they spread the ashes something happens: The ghost of Muscleman's dad manifests himself and saves his son, taking the chance to apologize to his son and having the chance to say his final good bye personally. Despite the inherent silliness of the show's premise, i think this episode really did a good job on expressing that sense of catharsis of making peace with the passing of a love one.

-The Final Girls, 2015 A friend suggested we watched this movie, and much like Twisted metal up there, i absolutely did not expect for this incredibly stupid comedy horror movie to hit me with any sort of emotional connection, and yet... The Final Girls opens with the main character in a car with her mom, who is an struggling C-tier actress whose biggest achievement ever was appearing on a Friday the 13th knock off movie, during this sequence they get in an accident where the mom dies and even after it's been some time since the accident the main character has not properly moved on from the passing of her mom. Her friends and some people at the college she attends are preparing this horror movie festival where the main event is they are going to play the movies from the franchise her mom was on, and they suggest she should come. Then some bullshit happens and they all end up somehow trapped in the world of the movie. A quick rundown of the rules of horror movies is explained to them, the monster cannot be defeated by fighting it, it's only the final girl who can defeat the killer, and unfortunately for them they accidentally killed the character that, in the canon of the movie, is the final girl, so they believe one of them has to become the final girl and end the movie to hopefully get out of it. The problem is, the main character is experimenting shock from interacting with her mom's character, she is not taking well to seeing her mom on the flesh and she dedicates the entire movie to "save her mom", in the climax of the movie the mom character begins to understand that she is a fictional character and the nature of her attachment to the main character, understanding that they cannot be both the final girl and if then main character wants to make it back to the real world she has to learn "To let go", choosing to sacrifice herself so there is only one final girl. It's kinda weird, that of all possible premises, this managed to make a "You need to move on" message that somehow managed to resonate with me, you might have figured out by now a running theme here, but, i was really hard for me to deal with my mother's passing even if it's been years since it happened, so it's kinda funny for me to think these are the places i have found comfort from.

-Undertale, 2015 Okay this is tumblr, i already talked about Undertale on the prologue to, whatever the fuck im doing here, you know what undertale is, you know how effective it is, Undertale is really well designed for you to grow emotionally attached to these characters, so being able to see all these characters you know have grown attached to have their happy ending on the pacifist ending does fill one with a very satisfactory warm happy feeling that can move you to tears. ...Or you can be bummed out by being a little greedy gaming bitch and taking a look at the bad ending. Because you just couldn't help yourself, could you?

-Onward, 2020 This movie did not hit me as hard as the most emotional entries on this, but it still got me, because in the end of the day the main motivation of the characters on this movie is experiencing closure, catharsis over the death of their father, for Ian it's the fact that he died before he was born so he never met him and is driven by this desire to finally see the father who he shares such a connection with on the stories everybody who knew him in life have told him, and then there is Barley, the elder brother, who did know his dad in life, but is tortured by how, as a kid, he did not properly say good bye to him because he was terrified of death and avoided being there for him in his final days. The ending for this movie is very powerful, Ian choosing to sacrifice being able to meet his dad in the flesh, even for a few minutes, in order to give Barley the chance to being able to properly make peace with his dad and properly say good bye to him. Ian doesn't even get to SEE this, he does not get to see his dad even tho it was what he wanted most of all, but he understood bringing closure to Barley was more important than his selfish desire to see his dad, someone he never knew in life.

So what have i learned from whatever the hell this trainwreck of a post is...i guess that what really gets to me, what really moves me, is when a character, maybe not even someone i can realistically relate to, gets to experience closure, catharsis and be in peace with the people who are missing on their life. The majority of these things in here, even the Angel Hare example, relate to a character being able to experience catharsis by being able to properly make pace or otherwise contact someone they lost, or their ability to move on from this world, so to speak, knowing that their affairs and in order and that their loved ones will be okay.

Things can always look dark, the world may be trying to keep you down, maybe losing someone has been specially hard for you, but it's not the end of the world, you are loved and things can get better, it always hurts and we'll never stop missing what we have lost, but the memories of happier times are there to remind us, we can be happy again, and we can move on, use those memories as your motivation, you can lead yourself to a future filled with light.

#rambling #onward #mother 3 #angel hare #twisted metal #punch out #yoshi's island #undertale #deltarune #regular show #courage the cowardly dog #EBA

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brainrotgobrr · 7 months

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finished the teal mask and oh boy do i have thoughts…

(SPOILERS FOR THE NEW DLC IF YOU DONT WANT SPOILERS PLS DO NOT READ)

god. kieran. kieran is so refreshing from a character perspective. kieran is like the anti-hop. it kind of feels like he’s the protagonist and we’re the classic jerk rival, doesn’t it? this guy clearly has Issues and i really like that, im enjoying this sort of “why can’t i beat you” rival trope that gamefreak’s been doing lately. they nearly did it with hop but with kieran they’re really going full in. the character arc that kieran went through in this dlc was actually difficult for me to watch, seeing this poor boy destroy himself mentally. the first time i battled him for the final time i actually lost, and i was hoping that he would get to keep ogerpon because altho shes cute and i adore her, i felt so bad. but ofc thats not the way the cookie crumbles. kieran is socially awkward, he doesn’t know how to communicate, and he’s never had a true friend. then florian/juliana comes along and suddenly there’s someone who seems to genuinely enjoy hanging out with him that isn’t, yknow, related to him. but then that person that he was so eager to trust goes along and begins befriending and helping a pokemon that hes adored all your life behind his back. i relate to kieran a lot and ofc yknow the absolute maniac arc hes about to go through is probably not healthy but i rlly hope this ends up being good for him. he idolized ogerpon because of how he related to her story, not because of the actual living creature she is. i wouldnt be surprised if it turns out he doesnt value his pokemon as actual living creatures either. i could see him being like a reverse silver, as he grows colder growing to not even care about his pokemon.

on the other hand, carmine! carmine was such a delight, i was genuinely not expecting to enjoy her as much as i did. sure, she also has Issues and has probably been a negative effect on her brother, but at the end of the day she is also just a kid. she probably has no idea what shes doing, and i dont think shed ever hurt kieran. she went through a lot of growth in the dlc and i can see her trying to become a better person with the help of florian/juliana and repairing her odd relationship with kieran.

also, it seems like she kind of has to play a parental role for kieran, as its implied that their parents arent around. thats another thing that separates kieran and carmine from siblings like hop and leon (and oh my god im just realizing all the parallels between hop and leon and kieran and carmine). its implied that the galar bros had a good childhood, and hops Issues dont start until hes set off on his journey and leon is a full adult with an actual life. with the kitakami siblings, if you read between the lines you can tell that theyve had a harder time growing up. with carmines comments on tourism and how it’s negatively effected their town and give her Trust Issues, that obviously fucked them both up a little, seeing that people only valued their hometown as an attraction, and that they themselves were a part of that attraction. and of course we dont know what the issue was with their parents. also, why are they going to school in unova? (side not oh my god it is so obvious that we’re going to get bw remakes in gen 9 or a legends unova game)

kitakami is such an interesting region. obviously its tiny, it has one town and then everything else is just untamed land. i feel like something Else is going on here. or maybe its just small idk

i love ogerpon a lot i think shes adorable and i love that we got to run around with her before she joined our team and it makes the whole “ten year old catches legendary thing” feel more realistic

also why are ogerpon and the loyal three legendaries i feel like they should be mythicals them being legendary feels Wrong

anyways these were my silly thoughts on the dlc and i hope kieran turns out to be the bb leagues champion (pulling a blue) and also i dont trust briar now time to finish my pokedex and talk to legends arceus pandering i mean perrin and if i see anyone call carmine a terrible person i will trade away your ev trained competitive team ok bye

(also this scene made me emotional)

#pokemon #pokemon scarlet and violet #jocey plays games #pokemon scarlet and violet dlc #the teal mask #trainer florian #trainer juliana #trainer kieran #trainer carmine #MASKSHIPPING GANG WHERE ARE U AT #spoilers

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omartinyosef · 4 days

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THE THREE WATERFALLS ULTIMATE THEORY

So. Okay. Let's get this shit done.

The waterfall as a symbol can be interpreted in many different ways, depending on cultural, historical, and personal context. Here are a few common interpretations:

Nature: Waterfalls are often seen as symbols of nature's raw power and beauty, representing the majesty and grandeur of the natural world.

Change: A waterfall symbolizes change, as it is a constantly moving, evolving entity. The flowing water can represent the passage of time, or the journey of life.

Cleanliness: The waterfall's cleansing properties can symbolize purification and renewal, often used in religious or spiritual contexts.

Abundance: Waterfalls are often associated with abundance, fertility, and prosperity, representing a source of sustenance and life.

Adventure: Waterfalls can symbolize adventure and excitement, representing a journey into the unknown and a quest for discovery.

Continuity: The waterfall also represents continuity and the flow of life – how life flows, including its highs and lows.

So. Mike said ''three waterfalls''. Giving the word waterfall the last meaning, it symbolizs that life keeps going. But using the meaning of change, the thing changes (haha humor de cuñado).

Three waterfalls. Three ''changes''. Okay. What could this mean? Of course something that changes the whole series. Something that screams revolution 'cuz it's the end of the season and all that stuff.

Also: ''Waterfall change management is a sequential and linear approach to managing changes in a project or system.''

This could mean that, through the whole season, we are gonna see three important changes/plot twists, but happening slowly? And the three waterfalls Mike said could be the final product of those changes. Of course Mike and Will are gonna have romantic interaction in season 5. And shut up you milkvans 'cause it's undeniable. Like, really. It's confirmed Will's in love with Mike, so it's gonna be a important part of the season. And if we think about byler happening, we have one change.

Another change that could happen is El and Mike's relationship. 'Cause if they break up we will have a change that affects the whole series. And with that we have two changes. Now third, which i dont have any idea of what it could be. Let me know in your comments. And if we think about the video games, surprise!! Often a video game has a secret hiding within a waterfal. So, this is gonna be like 3 secrets developing on season 5.

Like, could this be a pararell with 'Fantastic beasts: The secrets of Dumbledore?'', cause there's 3 secrets along the film. And the first revealed secret (that we all knew about) Is that dumbledore and Grindelwald we in love. AND we know that will's in love with Mike. So DING DING DING!!! First secret. Also, it's clear that One/Henry/ Vecna is hidding something about Will. Cause like, really, look at this

This is NOT a demogorgon and It used telekinesis to open the shed's door will locked. And manipulated the lightning. Bro. Fr. So we will find out why Vecna took Will and not anyone else. And DING DING DING!!! Second secret revealed. The third secret could be that this little guy:

LITERALLY SCREAMS:

(I use this flag cuz idk if you think mike's bi or gay)

So this three waterfalls have 3 secrets behind them and through the season we will see our dear characters face it and solving their messed up shit?

Maybe.

Good Lord i dont even know how i did this

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mazzystar24 · 20 days

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Hello, I hope you are having a good day. I was wondering if I could ask your thought and possible speculation for next episode. I've read what you've answered so I hope this is not a redundant ask.

I know and we all know that this is gonna hurt Buck to feel left behind to be replaced even maybe not feel good enough to be Eddie's friend (or more but my shipper heart need to calm down) and most of us realise that this is most likely, hopefully the time where buck is gonna realise that he feels more towards eddie. But my question is more regarding Eddie, what do you think happens in his pov? Like eddie doesn't have the same problems as buck regarding abandonment issues but he knows buck has them. You think he gonna realise them like during their basketball fight or after (that is gonna hurt to watch) or maybe someone will point it out? And if he realises it would he also go on a journey to realise his feelings or at least have him question why buck feel that and him wanting buck to realise that he should never think eddie will leave him?

And last then I'm stopping cause I don't want to be a bother, but what about Christopher? You think he's gonna be mentioned? Maybe Tommy mentioning him or something switch the flip for buck to start a fight (I know it's mostly and accident but I dont know how else to put it) or eddie uses christopher to anchor him (more episode 7x05 I guess then)? But that feels like the first one hurts way too much and the second like eddie would mask his feelings by using Christopher as a sort os middle ground/shield.

Sorry for the long ask is just that I ve always been the person whose friends preferred other friends and never picked for teams that sort of thing so just the sneak peak hurts to see and I wanted some insight and I've really liked your take on the whole thing. Also, fun fact the only person that did pick me I ended up marrying so eddie please take note lol

Hey anon thanks and you too! <3

I think Eddie’s perspective is super interesting to get into this episode because I genuinely think that he genuinely doesn’t realise that buck could be jealous because in his head he’s reassured Buck so many times and he himself is so self assured in their friendship and their places in eachothers lives that I think it genuinely doesn’t cross his mind at first to even think buck may be jealous. Like you saw him in that sneak peak like he saw buck and started bouncing on his heels like OMG BUCK IS COMING? YOU SHOULD HAVE MENTIONED THATS SO GREAT!!!!!🥰😍👏🏽👏🏽

I think like when he sees the jealousy that seems to be apparently directed toward him over tommy(??) and also towards him having other friends that he’ll be a little pissed and hurt and confused inside but nothing like deep or angsty I think he knows buck enough to like understand how deep his insecurities lie and will very easily overcome this little conflict

I don’t think from his perspective he’d question buddie things based off of this because their relationship has always been different than other friendships and buck has always been very insecure in general so he may hash it up to that, but if buck were to point out that not only is he feeling replaced on a friendship level by Tommy and maybe mention something about Marisol it could cause a little 🤨👀👀👀 moment but I think that’s the secret optimist in me

Ah stop don’t worry about being a bother I legit love these asks, on the Christopher front I think that’d be hard to fit in but would be cool to see, like I think that based off interviews it’s supposed to be a very lighthearted episode so I’m not expecting an overt amount of angst. But Chris is such a huge part of Eddie’s life and this is a character driven episode so I can see them mentioning him. Also I sorta made a joke about this but I can see them not so subtly comparing player Chris at the start of the season to this funny little jealousy thing going on between buck and Eddie.

Again DONT APOLOGISE FOR THE LONG ASKS AND I WONT APOLOGISE FOR THE LONGASS RAMBLING ANSWERS (that’s a lie I will continue to do that but I’m a hypocrite) I totally get what you mean like that is such a shitty feeling but I don’t think that this episode seems to be that angsty so hope it’s lighthearted for you too when it airs. That last part was so adorable btw yes Eddie should take notes from you and your spouse 😌

#911 #buddie #evan buckley #eddie diaz #911 fox #evan buck buckley #911 abc #911onfox #buckley diaz family #911 spoilers #911 spec #911 speculation #asks #asks open #send asks #answered asks

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jemmo · 7 months

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to say im in love with the most recent ep of my personal weatherman would be a gross understatement bc my god, i dont think a show has ever pulled off two idiots that are in love and don’t know how to express it so perfectly.

(put in a read more bc wow that got long)

and this ep is perfect for that bc it explains so well segasaki’s behaviors and attitudes up to this point, where we previously hadn’t got to see that much behind his curtain. we’ve seen yoh, we’re privy to his inner thoughts a lot, and we know why he’s in a difficult place with his feelings at the moment, and we know the way he perceives segasaki, which was complicated to begin with and has only gotten more so. but in this ep, we get to see this whole journey of where segasaki has come from, why he is the way he is, and how he found some kind of solace with yoh, and why he’s panicking at the idea of that solace crumbling.

and it’s genius bc it’s a backstory i never really saw coming, it’s one of the few times i could predict something in a bl. this idea of him not being an outright people pleaser, more so just a good observer of the status quo and acting accordingly to get by with as few problems as possible. and with his looks, his general demeanor and such, it means he can easily integrate with these ‘popular’ people who aren’t actually popular, they just act the way that they think gains them popularity, namely acting superior. it’s never that segasaki was like that, they were just his social security blanket.

(and no, it does not escape me that this set up is very much like utsukushii kare and I’d very much like to dive into how those shows take this same basis to establish in some ways very different and in other ways very similar relationships, and why so often with these dynamics we see these recurring themes of like… extreme obsession and dependency and a fear of being left, but another day)

I think what was a real breakthrough for segasaki wasn’t just first glance, but seeing those drawings of himself yoh did, seeing himself being that removed and void and emotionless and realizing that this random kid he didn’t even know and who’d only seen him for a moment could see that in him. and it’s this simultaneously realization in himself and these burgeoning feelings for yoh that lead to this change. he’s not dropping the mask, it’s more so that he feels this comfort around yoh that he’s never felt before and so he’s suddenly realizing how exhausting it is to put on the act. and he’s both treacherous and unsure and unwilling to expose himself in that way, but also feels this need to reject it now that he knows the weight of it.

and just like that, as soon as it slips, as soon as he lets yoh in, my god he just becomes fixed. he just like yes, this one, he’s mine, end of story. but it’s insane to me that, despite all the undertones, none of it is romantic at this point, and even to where we are in the present, none of it is ever presented or established as a romantic relationship between them. it’s sexual and dependent, bc they both know they need each other, segasaki especially, but they just aren’t able to recognize that it is romantic. and it keeps coming back to this thing about smiling, that the other never smiles for them, or segasaki saying i can smile better than that, they just want to see each other happy, and they want that happiness to be because of them. but bc of the mental places they come from, my good they just cannot do that. it’s such a mental block for them both. yoh is coming from this place of having complicated feelings but all the way back in those early eps, he did all this stuff for segasaki and just got indifference in return and he just wants to feel like those efforts are appreciated, that he is appreciated, and when segesaki said what he did about his manga, that’s the clearest way yoh has got the message that segasaki doesn’t appreciate him as a person. meanwhile segasaki is just so dependent on yoh at this point but still has this lingering tendency not to show his true emotions and remain stoic and removed bc that’s just what he’s used to, and while he does try to communicate his feelings for yoh in some ways, they’re just not the best and yoh doesn’t register, hence the way he behaves, so uptight and on edge around segasaki, that when he sees yoh smiling or having fun or at ease around other people, he just panics and goes to extremes and you know… ties yoh up. he just can’t handle the idea of yoh finding happiness elsewhere bc then he’ll leave and segasaki will suffocate. literally, going back having that front on all the time, like when he’s at work, with no escape, it’ll stifle him so much he can’t breathe. but this is where segasaki needs to start unlearning what he’s used to and being honest and open, and equally yoh needs to speak up for himself if he wants something to change.

but also with yoh, and i wrote about this before when i said this show was like watching two people trying to reconcile with and navigate wanting a dom/sub relationship, or at least something with those undertones, and not just sexually (or even sexually at all), but in their dynamic. bc in these flashbacks we see the essences of that kind of relationship that they have shown up to now, and this is their first prolonged interaction, which shows this isn’t just something that’s been put on them or evolved into per say, it’s a way they naturally behave, their tendencies, that manage to sync up. yoh is instantly willing and eager to serve, to tend to segasaki, not just feed him but cook for him where he isn’t a proficient cook just bc segasaki said he doesn’t like convenience food as an offhand comment. like not many people would go and make a full curry in a guy’s house you’ve talked to maybe 4 times just for that reason, but he does. equally, he goes out and buys a whole range of drinks and puts them out for segasaki to pick bc he hopes that in those choices he picked the one that was right, and in that small interaction of segasaki saying he didn’t mind then picking one, the way yoh goes from disheartened to happy with himself. he wants to look after segasaki, to serve him, and his feelings get complicated when, as we saw with those drinks, he doesn’t get appreciated for it. so when he does the cooking and cleaning and laundry and segasaki doesn’t seem happy about it, that’s when he gets annoyed and angry.

and on the other side, you see segasaki immediately unleash this need to be the only person in yoh’s life, this obsession, to know him the most, and for him to be the only person yoh does these things for. he eats a curry and asks for the rest to be saved in tupperware for him to eat later solely bc he wants to be the only one that knows the exact way in which yoh’s cooking is bad. he wants the joy of someone asking yoh if he can cook, and yoh saying he can make curry, for only him to know he actually can’t, it’s awful. and it’s the way the underlying thing of it is seeing these bad points, these weaknesses of yoh, is what he enjoys as well as the want to see him happy only for him and only because of him. it’s wanting to be able to hold those extremes over yoh, make him overjoyed bc he appreciates him and praises him so much, but also squirm and feel bad bc he knows the ways in which he is imperfect, bc he doesn’t see them as flaws, he sees them as the intricate ways he knows all of yoh there is to know. if that does not scream dom, idk what does.

and what i hope for in this final ep is some kind of exploration in finding happiness in the exact kinda fucked up way their relationship works. i want segasaki to tie yoh up and say these things about him not being allowed to see other people, and for yoh to both stand up for himself but also kind of… like it. it’s such a hard line to tread bc you don’t want to present some of these things as ok, but I think it’s important to show that before you can behave these ways knowing it’s ok, and esp if you don’t have good communication, you have to kind of just… do it. and i think these people care enough about each other that it would never cross the line, but at least in this fictional space it feels like it needs to be there for them to explore it and find the ways they both enjoy it (and im saying this fully only commenting on this in fiction and the way the story is, not a real life situation) anyway, I just think it would be great to show how, in a roundabout, messy way, these two people manage to get on the same page and communicate better and enjoy the ways they are dependent on and obsessed with each other bc at the end of the day they are just so fucking in love with each other, and this is just the way that’s expressed. it’s not gonna be a case of oh I see I was too much I was wrong I love you let’s me a nice happy lovey dovey couple, it’s very much i love you I’m obsessed with you our dynamic is still our dynamic but now we just smile a lot more bc we know we are both happy with the way we love each other. it’s about removing that grey area of doubt for both of them, knowing yes I am appreciated and yes I won’t be left, bc they learn the ways to show their feelings to each other that removes those doubts.

and finally, both bc i forgot earlier and bc i loved it so much and it made me cry a lot (it’s been a long week, spare me), I wanna talk about that prolonged head pat. the way segasaki does it, not just a pat but playing with the hair and down to his ear, more like the actions of an inquisitive baby than anything else, bc that’s what he is in that moment, inquisitive as to why this boy makes him feel this type of way, and the way yoh keeps glancing to it and doing that small laugh that you do when something seems awkward and you wanna draw attention to it hoping someone will see it’s awkward and stop, or at least acknowledge it, bc he’s uncomfortable, but segasaki doesn’t do anything, doesn’t stop or acknowledge what he’s doing, he just carries on, and it’s almost like he looks at yoh as to say no I’m not stopping I’m gonna do this yes it might be weird and kinda awkward but I want to do it so I will and i won’t be the one to stop myself just bc you’re signaling that you’re a little uncomfortable. and ultimately yoh does nothing, doesn’t move the hand, doesn’t even move away from the touch, he just lets it happen, let’s the moment be weird and uncomfortable but also feels that weird joy from it. and like… at least for me, that’s the spark of someone finding out they like that weird idea of being praised and appreciated, and it’s magical that segasaki ignites that in him bc of the specific way he is at his core, not the mask but instead letting feeling out and acting on impulse, being brazen and forward and not backing down when he does something. I just thing it’s beautiful that you see in these flashbacks all these small ways in which they discover the dynamic of their relationship and how it proves that there can be a future where they’re both happy in it after they get over their own doubts and learn to communicate better. honestly this show is just such a treat to pick apart and explore lenses to read it from and god i don’t want it to end

#my personal weatherman #mpw #taikan yoho #I crawled out of the floorboards to rant once again #I think this is how my tumblr is gonna be from now on bc I don’t have a lot of time to be active but when I have feelings I still need an #outlet so here I am #rants never die!!!

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