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nerdygaymormon · 3 years

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uhhhh david have you gotten the liahona yet bc idk how to feel about an article i found in there yesterday. it was pretty comforting and basic, but did use ssa the whole time. BUT the youth one was pretty crappy, it used ssa to the max and gave no real hope, was pretty bland and annoying about oh itll be find just believe and jesus and get hatecrimed <3 i would like to hear your thoughts on it, its the first time ive seen any queer topics in church magazines

Thanks for bringing these to my attention.

"Same-sex attraction" (SSA) is the preferred term of Church leaders. They say it's a way of not making it your identity, that this isn't part of who I am but rather is something I'm dealing with. In other words, people "have" same-sex attraction, not that they "are" gay or lesbian or bi.

There have been a few leaks from behind-the-scenes where the apostles say they use "same-sex attraction" because it's the term that people like least. People like it less that same-gender attraction or gay/lesbian. SSA includes the word "sex" and I guess the idea is it gets people to think of sexual acts and feel queasy.

SSA is the term normally used in Church magazines because they follow the lead of the First Presidency and apostles.

There's 3 items in the Church magazines this month about queer people! That's a lot for one month.

————————————————————

The first is a bishop talking about how to understand and include LGBT people at church. After becoming bishop, 3 sets of parents contacted him distressed that their child is gay or transgender (I note that the parents used "gay." He also mentions contacting someone who 'identifies as gay").

His first recommendation is to follow the living apostles. (which explains why the bishop uses "SSA" even though everyone else around him used "gay"). It's a good idea for a local leader to find what the current leaders are saying because it's changed. He also says to read the Church's websites titled “Same-Sex Attraction” and “Transgender.” He provides two lovely quotes from those pages about diversity at church and being loving to people who are different.

His second recommendation is to not be afraid to talk to people who identify as gay, but instead try to have love for them and then let the Spirit guide you in what to say. We're just people, it shouldn't be scary to talk to us, that shows how different he thinks we are from the other people he interacts with in his ward.

The bishop's third suggestion is to speak to people who are familiar with LGBT "issues," share your testimony, and apologize for hurtful things you say. His list of people to contact for help understanding was a little disheartening because he starts with his stake leaders, ward leaders, other bishops, and so on, actual queer people were the last people on his list.

He continues by saying to pull aside members who are saying homophobic or transphobic things and give them some personal guidance, don't share private information that a member shares with the bishop, and just because someone has these "attractions" doesn't mean they're acting on them, and if they aren't "acting" on them then you can let them have a calling.

I have a few comments about the last few things. If no one corrects the homophobic/transphobic comments in public but instead privately suggests the person do better, every one who heard those comments thinks they stand unchallenged. The atmosphere created by the comments is unchanged. Especially if the bishop was present to hear those words, if they go uncontested then people think this is what is acceptable.

You'd think bishops know not to share private information a member shares with them. I've been around long enough to know that when a bishop is unsure what to do, he starts contacting his network (stake presidency, other bishops) asking for advice. Some bishops are discreet when doing this and others name the individuals.

While it seems basic, I recently had a counselor in a bishopric who didn't think gay people could get a temple recommend, that there's a zero-tolerance policy. That is an attitude that is outdated by a couple of decades, but it shows that people need to learn that simply existing as a gay or trans person doesn't automatically mean we are committing great sins.

I do find it interesting there appears to have been quite a few queer individuals in his ward, at least 4 or 5, and reading between the lines it seems they all stopped attending.

The bishop's heart is in the right place. I get he's following the Church leaders and that limits some of what he can do for queer people in his ward. I think his perspective primarily is of making the parents feel more welcome in the ward and not ostracized for having queer kids.

————————————————————

The second article in the Liahona is written by a person with same-sex attraction and his work to overcome the shame he felt.

It's a much better article than the one written by the bishop. This person shares about the shame they felt at having gay feelings and working with a therapist to overcome that shame. He shares 3 lessons that helped him with this process.

1) God and Jesus love and accept him as he is. This is a message that doesn't often get conveyed to queer members and it's important they know this.

2) The Atonement of Jesus Christ offers healing. At first he was wanting the Atonement to cure him of being gay, but instead it helped him be healed of the shame he felt. I hear so many members who think the Atonement can change us from gay to straight, and that's not true. I'm glad he made this distinction. Our Heavenly Parents don't view being gay or trans as something that needs to be cured. I wish that message was taught more openly in the Church.

3) Build deeper connections and show compassion. Loneliness and feeling like you don't belong at church are two of the most troubling aspects an LGBTQ+ person has to deal with if they are active in the LDS Church. Developing close friendships will help with that. Also, queer people tend to be more compassionate than the average person and I believe it's because of the experiences we had to deal with of living in a heteronormative world that isn't made for us.

He includes a few useful tips at the end on how to engage with queer people.

All in all, a much better story than the one written by the bishop. He shared part of how it feels to be a gay member of this church, the idea that he should be ashamed for who he is, that being gay isn’t a burden, that he doesn't fit in.

I appreciated he said this is part of his layers of identity and at the core of his identity is that we're children of heavenly parents. That's more nuanced than the apostles who reject being gay has anything to do with identity and our only identity should be a child of God.

————————————————————

The final story is from For the Strength of Youth. This piece seems like it's written by a queer person, but it's anonymous and given as general advice to show that people with same-sex attraction belong at church.

This article makes 3 main points. The first is that God loves you. That's true, although accompanying quotes to back up this principle aren't specifically about queer people.

The second point is "you belong." All sorts of people attend church, and God is no respecter of persons. Then they have a quote from Elder L. Whitney Clayton that people with same-sex attraction are welcome to come to church. To me, he's an odd choice to give this message as he led the Church's fight in California on Prop 8 to make gay marriage illegal again. Words aren't enough. Saying I'm welcome is not the same as making a welcoming climate.

The third point is that God will help you. They include a quote from Laura F. who experiences same-sex attraction. She writes about prayer, scripture study, temple and church attendance. However, she also says she doesn't know what her life will look like in 20 years, she seems to be leaving open the possibility her journey with God will lead her to romance and out of the church. I thought that was very honest and important.

————————————————————

I found it noteworthy that nowhere in these 3 articles does it say being alone and celibate is good and what God wants.

I appreciate the idea that we can make our local congregations less homophobic/transphobic. The suggestions from the bishops shows that the bar is pretty low and it doesn't take much to make an improvement from how things are now.

The voices of the two gay members was important, what they shared was useful but nuanced, didn't make commitments to staying in the church long-term or testify that what the church requires is what God wants for them.

Even so, it's clear the publisher is very careful. They use "same-sex attraction" so often, I think readers would be surprised the preferred term of most same-sex attracted people would be gay, bi or lesbian. While they addressed some things, like homophobic/transphobic comments, feeling shame & not fitting in, I think they largely skated past the things that make queer people decide that this church isn't for them.

There's a part of me that says I'm glad we're having this conversation in the Church magazines, but another part that says this is too sanitized and doesn't get at the heart of things. These are very hopeful messages that make it seem that queer people could easily choose to stay in church if a few adjustments were made and if they only understood God loves them, which avoids the "doctrine" that excludes queer people from the highest blessings and joys and makes us essentially second-class citizens in the kingdom of God, at least according to our church.

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michibikionmain · 3 years

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This isn’t THE tommyinnit villain essay but it sure is one of them

Ok ok so 4 those of u who aren't on discord with me: i have two main essays that have been in the works for MONTHS, these being my Complete Dream character analysis essay going in-depth for nearly all of his canon interactions and finding his character traits and motivations through the story, and my Tommyinnit (and Wilbur Soot) were Always The Villains on the server essay talking about how the only reason so many people view them as the good guys or heroes is because we see the story from their perspective mainly. This essay? Is not either of those. BUT, it does go through a lot of my thoughts on Tommy and Dream’s characters so I figured I’d post it. maybe itll help me organize my thoughts 4 my Mega Projects lol

@ranboocore bc u helped me pop off on this so hard LMAO

Warning, it’s VERY Tommy Critical, what a suprise. I do not like Tommy as a character lol. idk what triggers yall might need me to tag but if u need one in particular pls lmn!

My biggest issue with tommy's character is that he SAYS hes learned but he never does he is exactly the same person he was at the start of the server just More Sad and with Trauma, when out of all the characters he's had the most push to change. c!Tommy is a very tell-don't-show character which can make it hard for some people to connect to him, especially those who don’t directly share his trauma or see themselves in his character. Of course, there is still a MASSIVE amount of people who relate to his struggles and thus love him regardless of his writing, but those who can't relate to him will always feel some kind of barrier until the things they've talked about are actually shown to the viewer instead of being spoon-fed to them.

It is a very beginner writing thing, and I'm hoping that Tommy is figuring out how to fix this, maybe with support from the many other writers on the server. There's the 3 you mentioned, plus fundy, niki, and maybe tubbo who also play dnd, plus Dream who said he would've been an English major and does a lot of personal writing for fun. I think the biggest issue in the writing lies in the individual ccs being inexperienced in the medium, particularly with planning out their own character growth.

Another glaring issue I have with c!Tommy is how he's framed to be sympathetic and he goes through all these horrible things without acknowledging his role in any of them. The things that have happened to him are a direct result of his actions, but the thing is HE won't acknowledge and so it falls flat. This isn’t to say that being abused is his fault, because it’s NEVER the vicitm’s fault, but being exiled? His multiple fights with c!Dream? His friendships falling apart? Losing the disks in the first place? They’re the direct consequences of HIS OWN actions, but he never acknowledges this and constantly just... brushes off any accountability by either saying that it’s Dream fault or simply SAYING he feels bad without properly showing it through redemption and GROWTH.

Denial is useful in storytelling sometimes, but Tommy's character has been in denial since the very beginning of the server and at this point it's just exhausting. He only ever switches between denial and depression, not really going through all 5 stages of grief properly. His violent/upset reactions would be more powerful if they were any different from how tommy usually acts, but this is always how he is. When he “lashes out” because he’s reached the end of his patience, it doesn’t SEEM like the snap it is because that’s just... it’s seriously just his standard reaction to everything. It hold no WEIGHT to see c!Tommy yell at someone violently or threaten to fight them because he does that anyways!

Static characters can be a good thing, and can be interesting if done correctly, but not every character SHOULD or CAN be static in a story.

Static characters need to have their position or behavior challenged and question, where they look into if the way they see and interact with the world is really the 'correct' one or just evaluated to see if they truly believe in them. This questioning period is CRUCIAL! and NEEDS to be well done in a way that ACTIVELY SHOWS the conflict between the two ideals. If they decide to hold onto their beliefs/continue their behavior then, it feels deserved, because rather than just being a flat "they do thing its who they are" they have defined WHY. WHY is a very important question to think of when telling the difference between dynamic and static characters. The why of a character is ESSENTIAL to developing them as a relatable, sympathetic person rather than a flat story telling device. It makes them a human rather than a puppet. When a character's motives aren't well defined or discussed, they're doomed to fall flat in everything else, because the WHY is the foundation of what makes them who they are.

c!Tommy has an underdeveloped "why", his motivations are weak, rarely properly discussed and when they are it doesn't particularly stick with him. His motivations change without showing us the internal struggle that should come from literally shifting your driving principles. There are some good MOMENTS of him reevaluating the importance of certain things, but they're so spread out and contradictory and immediately spat one that they're hard to piece together. He TELLS us what his motivations are as well, which is another big flaw when it comes to all that but we don't have time to unpack all THAT Anyways, the key to static story telling is reaffirmation. The character goes through a complete journey and ends with the same beliefs because they've looked into why they have them and determined that they still matter to them. A great example of static writing in my eyes is c!Techno, who since the beginning has believed that governments are bad. c!Techno enters the server to destroy a government, and still ends up doing that because he sees and we see him experience that the reasons he didn't like government before still hold true and he has no reason to support them any more than before, and so his anarchist beliefs are REAFFIRMED, proving to him that they way he handles things is the right one for him.

c!Tommy’s attachments are all just... they're all so weird. like he LITERALLY SACRIFICES HIS LIFE MULTIPLE TIMES for L'manburg. By action of sacrifice it seems like it should be the most important thing to him, but then he throws it away for some disks that mattered less to him just a minute ago. But then it's all about how c!Tubbo is worth more than Anything and maybe he's found something more important! but then he shoves THAT out the window for the discs again ig!!! but then it's about l’manburg again? Make it make sense.... pls....

Here's smth that really irks me about Tommy's character, and is kind of weird but give me a second to explain: Tommy has never actually permanently lost much of anything on the server. Every punishment he's ever received he's tried to find some way around. And like... I'm not expecting him to be HAPPY to face the consequences of his actions but seeing him constantly have his cake and eat it too is very irritating, especially when there are characters who DO have to deal with actual permanent sacrifices. The whole thing with the disks. where he WILLINGLY OFFERED THEM UP AND GAVE THEM AWAY THEN SPENT FOREVER TRYING TO STEAL THEM BACK WHILE CLAIMING DREAM STOLE THEM FROM HIM, is the biggest example of this, but it's generally his characters way of dealing with things. He's very backhanded and conniving, constantly calling himself "big man" except for when he wants things from people and he plays up the "iM a MiNoR" card to try and get them to give him things or feel bad. He's not just some sweet innocent kid like people paint him, he knows damn well he's messed up and while he SAYS he feels bad about it, he has never once really shown, with his ACTIONS, regret for what he's done except for the stuff with c!Sapnap, which could it could be argued he did because he thought it would help get c!Sapnap on his side to fight Dream and he knew c!Sapnap was a skilled warrior and could possibly be persuaded to fight with dream.

c!Tommy is in NO way some sweet innocent child, he knows what he's doing. He KNEW l'manburg was a drug empire, and wanted to turn his hotel into the same He was FULLY prepared to just murder c!Schlatt for legally winning an election that he KNEW was rigged AND INTENDED TO HELP RIG HE LITERALLY TEAMED UP WITH c!TECHNOBLADE KNOWING THAT HE INTENDED TO BLOW UP L'MANBURG AND ONLY LEFT WHEN HE REALIZED IT WASN'T GOING TO ACTUALLY HELP HIM--

The line of c!Wilbur saying "Tommy, are we the bad guys?" wasn't him mentally going batshit it was him realizing that the entire time they've been doing terrible things. c!Wilbur was literally ALWAYS Vilbur but the time people CALL Vilbur is when c!Will himself realized he was a villain.

#like. VERY critical #i do not like the child can you tell?#im sorry tommy fans but i am not one of you #and before you ask: Yes I have and do watch his perspective of the SMP just so i can try to understand his thought process #dream smp #dsmp #dream smp analysis #dsmp analysis #critical analysis #prince/pea and i pop off about this so much LOL #this is the first of MANY essays/collective analysis bits ive written about Tommy #lets see how many ill have by the time i finish going through the discord #tommyinnitcritical #discourse #ig. i saw a lot of ppl asking 4 this tag on similar posts so i thought id add it?

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if-the-crown-fits-translate-it · 3 years

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Discord pt 86

[Date: 16/03, 10:14 PM GMT - 16/03, 10:45 PM GMT]

[Direct continuation of pt 85]

[Maxwell: "youre not looking out for me"]

Baroness: "Oh, but i am! i just want to make sure that things are blooming nicely. :)"

Maxwell: "quit it with the flower jokes bitch"

Baroness: "Mona, i'm sure you can find some more medicine for max in one of those first aid kits you have. How about you go check? :)"

Little-K1ng: "i c-...one. .. of those..? wait i.."

donti(e): "whats wrong mona”

Little-K1ng: "how does she know i have more than one first aid kit

they're under the sinks"

Baroness: ":)"

Renboo: "i thought it was very abvious she's watching you guys constantly"

donti: "she watches you.."

Little-K1ng: "yeah but... i dont go under the sink?"

Jack: "pfft. haha"

Little-K1ng: "the first aid kits dont get cracked into unless i like, need something out ofthem"

Jack: "that is funny, actually"

Little-K1ng: "i keep bandaids and other stuff out"

Jack: "no offense"

Renboo: "ok were else would you keep 1st aid kits- and whos to say she hasnt been in your house-"

Maxwell: "how the fuck is this funny jack"

Little-K1ng: "no fair its a little funny in retrospect that ive been keeping them stocked like that but like... unless she, personally, has been in here theres no way for her to know they're there

or whats in them"

Jack: "i don't know. "its fucking creepy to watch people" this and “Jack, my friend, my pal, i know you're concerned!” that. it's a little funny."

Maxwell: "god this is so much happening at once"

[Jack: "i don't know. "its fucking creepy to watch people" this and “Jack, my friend, my pal, i know you're concerned!” that. it's a little funny."]

Renboo: "wel you're not wrong-"

[Little-K1ng: “or whats in them”]

Baroness: “It's important to know what your family has stocked. You never know when you may need something!”

Little-K1ng: "dont take shit out of my kits what the fuck

hang on i uh i have to go and check them"

Maxwell: "....."

Little-K1ng: "itll be the one thing i need thats missing

oh ow fuck my head

got really bad vertigo when i stood up fmdghdf"

Jack: "uh huh. is there anything blooming behind your ears, by chance."

Little-K1ng: "feeling around, im coming up empty handed

no weird little metal buds from me

ive just been on/off sick the last few weeks"

Little-K1ng: "im normally really healthy, but the florescent lights at work have been killing my head

ill keep an eye out and keep you guys updated, at least my eyes work somewhat now

for now ive gotta go check some kits <:)"

Baroness: "Well, i must be off now. Before i make my leave, i shall leave you with a poem. :)

fair flower, that dost so comely grow,

hid in this silent, dull retreat,

untouch'd thy honey'd blossoms blow,

unseen thy little branches greet."

Baroness: "I will see you all soon. :)"

fetch: “...

what the fuck is she doing here.”

Renboo: “hey fetch”

Little-K1ng: “FETCH?”

Maxwell: “fetch?”

Baroness: "...hmm?

fetch: “get back here gets back here GET BACK HERE GET THE FUCK BACK HERE”

Maxwell: “FETCH”

fetch: “YOU ARENT FUCKING LEAVING. NOT IN ONE PIECE YOU GOD DAMN”

Little-K1ng: “WHAT

FETCH”

Maxwell: “HE JUST--”

Little-K1ng: “FETCH GET OUT OF THE WOODS YOU F

okay”

Little-K1ng: “okay i”

Maxwell: “He almost fucking tackled her holy shit”

fetch: “QUIT RUNNING AND MAKE THIS EASIER.”

Little-K1ng: “im gonna go get the kits just to patch up the hilarious injuries hes gonna come back with”

Renboo: “if he comes back”

Maxwell: “hes going to come back”

donti (e): “FETCH DON t”

Renboo: “fetch is running after baroness, into the woods, where the court's mansion probably is, now where do you think baroness is trying to run to”

Zo: “good luck fetch!”

Maxwell: “he wouldnt go that far its fine”

fetch: “NO NO NO YOU DONT GET TO RUN AWAY FROM ME”

Renboo: “ehh its always a possibility”

Little-K1ng: “........okay, the kits are there, just very obviously moved and sifted through. nothings taken

which SUCKS because the bandaids are ORGANIZED BY SIZE”

Baronness: “Fetch...! you should really... Take it easy on yourself! even dogs... Need their rest!”

Little-K1ng: “fetch go fuckin bite her she fucked with my bandaids”

Maxwell: “HA”

Renboo: “listen baroness i can forgive the stalking- but un-organizing the band-aids? are you serious?”

Little-K1ng: “my BANDAIDS”

fetch: “STOP RUNNING.”

Maxwell: “GET HER MAN WOOOOO aw shit ow yelling just hurt my head fucks....”

Baroness: “ow that hurt!”

Little-K1ng: “yes migraine is still here please dont yell”

fetch: “YEAH THATS RIGHT. IT BETTER HURT.”

Maxwell: “Go fetch go!”

fetch: “i need to keep up. i can't let her get away. I need t. to.”

Jack the Observer: “don't hurt her. she looks a lot like an old friend”

Little-K1ng: “fetch okay chill”

Renboo: “listen as much as most people want you to, i dont think beating up a court member will end well”

Maxwell: “fetch its alright now”

Little-K1ng: “if i have to go out into the woods and drag you home im going to walk very slowly just to spite you”

donti (e): “fetch you shouldnt hurt her too much :(”

Maxwell: “ha....yeah and i uh still need to talk to you about something fetch”

fetch: “...”

[fetch: “i need to keep up. i can't let her get away. I need t. to.”]

Baroness: “I'll see... You soon...! :)”

Jack: “do not hurt her”

Little-K1ng: “max,, if its about what i think it is ill handle it later, okay?”

[Baroness: “I'll see... You soon...! :)”]

fetch: “you better stay the fuck away.

i'm coming back home.”

Maxwell: “are you sure? he was in deep denial earlier”

[fetch: “you better stay the fuck away.]

Baroness: “:)”

Maxwell: “its why he left”

Little-K1ng: “yeah no ill handle it max"

fetch: “i nicked her a little. not enough.”

Jack: “enough.”

Jack the Observer: “that was enough.”

Little-K1ng: “fetch come home we need to have a chat about what happened earlier

and i do not want to have to go get you”

fetch: “i said I'm coming home. jesus fucking christ jack quit breathing down my neck.”

Renboo: “oh my god if you two start fighting-”

Jack the Observer: “you don't fucking hurt her, and we're good.”

Maxwell: “.....”

fetch: “god whats your deal. she isn't syd.

just because she looks like her doesn't mean anything.”

Jack the Observer: “she doesn't just look like her

and besides.”

Maxwell: “theres a difference between her and syd like there is between me and page and fetch and knight”

donti (e): “yea but its still her body”

fetch: “i'm not having this conversation. mona needs to talk to me. later.”

Jack: “fuck you guys, by the way.”

Renboo: “fuck you too!<3″

Little-K1ng: “no thats fair”

Jack the Observer: “i almost prefer Baroness.”

Little-K1ng: “well you would

in a light hearted sense, its hard to separate the court member from the friend you know”

Maxwell: “....”

[Jack the Observer: “i almost prefer Baroness.”]

Renboo: “that's a bit harsh innit-”

Jack the Observer: “no, not really.

i said "nearly". im already being generous.”

Renboo: “i dont see why you care for syd so much, it's rather silly in my opinion”

Jack the Observer: “...

okay.”

Renboo: “its not even syd at this point”

Jack the Observer: “...

...

alright.

im leaving.”

Renboo: “like sure they share a body but they arent the same person”

Little-K1ng: “jesus jack you scared me for a second there”

Renboo: “oh- ok bye!”

Maxwell: “.....

fuckin' 'ell”

Jack the Observer: “don't act like I'm your friend just becuase we're on the "same side"

[i leave]”

#on:discord #by:maxwell #by:fetch #if the crown fits #by:baroness

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laiqart · 4 years

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The Untamed vs MDZS Anime: Which is better?

Going to japan now. Currently in the plane. The in flight tv is broken. So... ive been watching mdzs on youtube!

Hot damn the animation is beautiful. Every frame is a work of art. How the hell. Its so beautiful. I mean they use 3D a lot for the backgrounds and boats but its still gorgeous and not too jarring. The lighting is so realistic, scenery too. All the fighting choreography is beautiful. The way the swords swing in the air looks so fluid, and when swords clash its in flashes of light the color of their sword. Such a tasteful yet stylistic choice. Everyone's, esp wwx, hair is so flowy, so detailed every strand sways in the wind. The waves reflect light and move smoothly. How the hell did they do that. How. I was thinking of doing those screencap redraw thingy with the scene when wwx whacks lwj's boat. (they also emphasised how far lwj's boat was sinking into the water, which makes it more convincing how wwx can deduce that theres something underneath vs the live action where lwj's boat looked normal..) it was damn beautiful. The thing is, the point of these redraws is that the animation looks simple, so the redraw would enhance the scene. But for mdzs, everything is already in peak quality, redrawing it will only look worse. Its like writing fanfiction of books. The original writing is so damn beautiful, fan fiction ends up being such a stark difference that the reader cant help but compare the 2.

Drama, as everyone says, shows better facial expressions due to the live actors, so emotions hit harder. But anime def LOOKs way better in all action scenes. Angles that follow the characters are used to emphasise scale between enemy and chracters, and all the movements feel so dynamic, and i love how when they use talisman spell thingies they got a circle of light in an intricate pattern thats super beautiful. In the drama, its just a piece of paper.

However, i prefer drama's lwj. Maybe cos wyb looks so young, its more believable when he freaks out over the adult book that wwx gives him in the library scene. In the anime, he looks 20+-30+. Its a bit hard to believe that he'd be worried over that. Idk theres a kind of innocence and naivety that leads to the stubborn refusal to express emotion that young lwj is plagued with that we have in the untamed (was this intentional on wyb's part or is it because the teenage lwj wig made his eyes look floaty, so he seems more like a teenager and naive, less experienced as a cultivator vs lwj 13 years later? Dk but it works!). In the anime, he looks like an adult thats calm and level headed already from the get-go. Idk maybe i just havent watched enough (only seen up til the water demons in caiyi town). In both anime and drama, everyone and i mean EVERYONE besides the fricking babies looks the same 13/16 years later. It doesn't feel like time has passed at all. I wish they would have maybe a change in costume, or hairstyle in the anime. The drama at least changes their costumes a little and neatens the hairstyle of jiang cheng and lwj to indicate maturity.

Btw i love that in the anime for the water demons section they had wwx and jc casually chatting (though its a blatant cornetto ad which is fricking weird. How can there be frozen treats back in those days), then wwx beautifully catapulting himself onto a boat and rowing away showing the unique and romantic af mode of transport in caiyi town, then smoothly transitioning to the lan bros on the bridge right above them with lwj asking why lxc decided to bring them along. Its just tying together so many scenes, quickening the plot along and yet doing it so naturally and seamlessly compared with the novel and drama.

Though i like that the drama involved wn and wq and have wwx save wn, and makes way more sense why wn would want to risk his life to help wwx recover his parents fricking corpse illegally right under the nose of wen chao and wen zhuliu.

The anime removed the entire mystery plot of a yan and the fairy goddess statue and thats honestly the best best best choice to make. In the drama, it was one of the worse sections ever cos i didnt understand who all these random ass characters were (it was one of the first mysteries in the drama) and yet it didnt go into detail like they did in the novel, so not only did i not know what was going on, i also didnt give a single shit about the characters. When i saw that they completely did away with the random passer bys who screwed around with the fairy statue, i was thoroughly impressed.

I liked that the drama let nhs have his own trouble making moments tho, like having him sneak a live bird into class. It makes it more convincing that wwx would be friends with him because they both have a mischievous side that they can both appreciate in each other. In the anime, nhs just looks like a loser nerd thats weak in swordplay and does wwx's homework for him, without a will of his own. It doesnt make sense why wwx would keep him around. Then again, maybe itll make the reveal that nhs is a conniving mastermind more impactful for the anime, oh well only time will tell.

I liked that lxc and lwj look similar in the anime. Its more convincing when people call them the twin jades of the lan clan. In the drama, they hardly looked like brothers. Lxc looks more like lwj's mentor or teacher rather than an older brother. In the anime, they look more siblingy.

I miss drama wen ning. I rmb when he looked so fierce and terrifying in his first appearance. I was legit intimidated. Oh how hes changed! Hes so fluffy now. In the anime hes equally menacing. His fight scene with the statue goddess was so beautiful. Doesnt it take a long time to animate the chains moving so fluidly yet dynamically yet somehow looks like it can disintegrate rock in an instant? The lighting on it too, how it reflected the fire of the forest around them. Have i mentioned how beautiful having that fight scene at night was? It was dark and ominous looking, yet the fire cast an epic looking light over the scene with warm orange glows. And the animators had that fiery light reflected in anything they could find: eyes, chains, swords.

Ooh but jiang cheng's whip looked prettier in the drama than in the anime, which is kind of weird given they were both cgi-ed. Somehow the lighting of the whip in the drama was brighter, looked more like real lightning vs the whip in the anime looking a little dull, like they colored it then added a gray filter. This is kinda bizarre given the laughably bad effects of the effects for everything else in the drama. Visuals for non human things is not the drama's strong suit, so it makes u wonder what happened for the anime whip. Maybe in the dark, the lightning would have to look hella bright and reflect on the surroundings (tedious to color) more so than in the day, hence why it looked worse in anime vs drama. Oh well.

As for lan sizhui, its weird that his voice is so deep in the anime (and audio drama!). Ive always seen him as a kiddo thanks to the live action, so hearing him sound mature is kinda off-putting. He sounds like a leader, and gives off lwj vibes vs in the live action where he gives a goody two shoes studious nerd vibe, whos just trying his best. Maybe this is better, he feels way more like a lwj-raised child(serious and business-like) which makes more sense. Live action lsz feels like a wwx(optimistic and intelligent) AND lwj(well-behaved and sensible)-raised child. Anime lsz looks like hes got his shit together. Jinling is fairly similar in both, maybe less prideful in the anime (in live action theres the scene where im pretty sure he indirectly kills one of his men by wishing for the fairy goddess statue to come to life. That was a hella asshole move. This was omitted in the anime.) Jingyi in the anime somehow looks snarkier. Maybe cos he straight up duels with jinling and kicks him down a dark cave. Ive been wondering why all the tumblr posts depict ljy as this sassy ass short tempered kid when he was quite tame (though sassy by lan standards) in the live action. Now i know.

The costumes for the drama is better, more detailed though thats expected i guess. I just love that they have little white gusu lan clan uniforms that wwx jc and friendos are required to wear. Its so cute and such a cool detail. In anime, theyre all in their usual garb, and they just look like random people who decided to turn up at lan qirens class. In the drama, it looks more like a school that they have to attend for half a year and it feels characteristic that gusu lan clan would require their students to have a uniform, given their incredibly strict regime type. It also serves to separate the happy carefree school days from all the other tragic af events in wwx's life. His costume starts out white showing innocence and purity of his naiive teenage years who had yet to experience hardship and still feels invincible as a youth. After school, he wears dark blue, as he goes on an adventure with lanzhan and experience how important the yin iron is (gives up the joking light hearted nature as a teenager by realizing the gravity of situation if the wen clan gets their hands on it) and maybe that hes not truly part of the jiang clan who wears purple. Then his costume eventually becomes black as he experiences his first life and death situation that he isnt sure he can handle. That child like assurance that "oh the seniors will let me off" or "im sure jiang fengmian will come to my rescue" gets demolished when he undergoes cruel indoctrination at the wen clans. This visual development may be a bit on the nose, but personally i love subtle representations.

Overall, the anime does do a better of job of explaining the world's mechanics, which is quite important. The drama is quite faithful to the book, at times even more so than the anime, so it irks me that this is the one thing they decide to skim on. The god damn premise, the first thing the audience needs: why the hell is wwx alive again and what is mo xuanyu doing?? I guess the drama thought that it explains itself but it doesnt really. It was really confusing. The anime, though somehow faster than the drama, still has the time to properly explain mxy. A technique ive noticed is that they do exposition during the fight scenes, which is so ingenius. Its visually appealing, as always, so its not boring, the viewers gets to understand whats going on AND it gives the sense that the characters are so skilled that they carry causal conversations while fighting supposedly weak enemies like zombies and water ghosts, which is accurate seeing how wwx and lwj and friends are supposed to be one of the most powerful cultivators.

TL;DR both are good lol

#the untamed #mo dao zu shi #wei wuxian #lan zhan #lan jingyi #lan xichen #lan wangji #jiang cheng #nie huaisang #lan sizhui #wei ying #jin ling #analysis #rant #thoughts #grandmaster of demonic cultivation #mo xuanyu

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dbzebra · 4 years

Note

☕️ OH YKNOW WHAT AT THAT NOTE? Talk about that dbs broly movie cuz yknow. That’s a hot topic of the ages that folk feel particularly really strongly about

ooooh ive been waiting for this one. We watched this together on discord so you know my general feelings but Im happy i got this ask lol.

putting this under read more cause it gets long

The new movie that everyone seems to love and adore.... that I dont. It was a pretty middle of the ground, meh overrated af movie. Not bad, just nothing special. I enjoyed watching it sure, but not something I have an inkling to return to anytime soon if ever. It was just ‘there’ for me.

First, I’ll say the good stuff. The visuals looked really pretty. Nobody was THAT out of character of the existing cast (save for the ending), which i feel weird to have to even mention it as a positive, but nothing really stood out to me as a defining moment for the little cast we had besides Goku’s “youre not a bad guy, i can tell” or w/e. SUPER SAIYAN 1 IS STILL GOAT. It looked soooo good in this movie i wish we couldve kept it the whole time instead of Blue. But i will say, Blue looked much better in this movie than the series. The darker-blue with the lighter blue eyes was a nice change from instead of the ugly bluish-green the series did. Also the aura looked better. Backgrounds like the ice area and even Planet Vegeta were amazing. Action was great too. little Bulla was cute. The OST i liked (the chanting really grew on me) and Blizzard is a banger i love that song. Oh and the aritisic license they took for the fusion scene with the reds and blues spiraling together was great

Anyway thats all the positives I have lmaoo

This film includes Minus and I already went in depth on why I hate Minus with a passion and why it’s the worst thing to come out of modern Dragon so yeah moving on. But the fact that they devoted screentime to Gokus backstory which ultimately served no purpose to the story of the film and couldve been used more valuably elsewhere.

I said the action was good, and it was, but it almost too good. At times it was so fast to tell that was going on and really lessened the impact for me. Like when they went into the other dimension or whatever, Gogeta went blue and Broly went LSSJ (idc if the name is different name, itll always be legendary SSJ to me lmao) so ast it was a blink and you miss it moment. like what? those moments shouldve been given even a little bit of focus.

Next the cast. Goku and Vegeta. AGAIN. snorefest. no Gohan, Piccolo is just there to show them the fusion, Goten and Trunks are still kids and look like babies (and Pilaf gang is with them which is another can of worms), no Android 17, who the series established as one of the top 4 fighters on Earth.

Do we get any of that? Nope. Just the two Blue and Bluer fucking again and again I. dont. care. anymore. Their dynamic is so boring and played out id rather watch paint dry. It was fun in Buu Saga, hell it was even fun in GT, but DBS constantly forcing this dynamic and Vegeta as the second Main Character needs to fucking STOOOP. Toei and Toriyama has no idea how to further Vegeta’s character because theyre stuck in this infinite loop.

Vegeta doesnt want to help Goku, he mentions Bulma and/or Trunks, Vegeta blushes, and then he decides to help. THAT HAPPENED LIKE SIX TIMES IN DBS ALONE. It happened in Buu saga as well, but it organically worked cause it was the first time but Bulma and Trunks were ALREADY DEAD/ABSORBED. The look on his face wasnt blushy or pouting for a gag, dude was legit shocked. I rag on Vegeta but he had some legit great moments in the early arcs and later parts of Buu Saga. Anyway im off track. They repeat that same exact character moment OVER AND OVER. cant tell you how many times we had “my Bulma, my bulla, my Trunks, my cabba” in the Tournament of Power alone, and this movie is no different.

DO SOMETHING ELSE FFS

Then we have Broly. ohhhhhh boooy Broly. if you can even call this version of him Broly. His backstory is kinda the same as original movie 8/Broly LSSJ, but its more tragic becuase according to most fans, if youre background is a sobstory, that equals better character. NO. sure it could, but that trope was so worn out so long ago I hate it. “waaa his life was bad, hes not a bad guy” bruh i dont care thats not Broly. just make an OC if you wanna do that. but nope. gotta use the marketing! (More on that later)

People like to criticize Z Broly as “he hates Goku cause he cried” or “all he says is Kakarot” which both are false. On the first point, Broly is a psychopath. He was stabbed as an infant and left to die along with Paragus cause he was too powerful. Then that same day Planet Vegeta explodes practically on top of them. The rest of his life hes basically either being controlled or on a rampage. So that one moment of peace is “ruined” by Goku in a sense cause he subconsciously associates that with Goku. On the second point, Broly was already mentally unstable and then nearly dying, getting caught in the explosion of a SECOND PLANET and then being frozen for seven years will fuck anyone up in the head. Z Broly in the original movie was sadistic af and he had a lot of memorable moments and lines that werent just screaming Kakarot, that Second Coming made him infamous for.

New Broly is legit a man-baby. People talk about old Broly having no personality and this new version having a deep character, but I dont see it. He acts like a child when hes with Cheelai and Lemo and then once the fighting starts he doesnt say a single word but yell. SOUND FAMILIAR?? But he gets a pass because the canon police says so right??? fuck off. New Broly is boring. Im tired of trying to make the Saiyans into ThEyRe noT aLl BaD sEe The SaIyAns ArE AcTuAlLy GoOd!!!11111 ugh i hate it. keep Broly a psycho and keep Bardock a prick. even that guy that went with Buzz Lightyear I mean Paragus was a sweet guy who couldnt fight because of course he was. At least they kept Paragus being a prick when he killed him. Tho his death was lame.

Cheelai’s overrated af. Shes just green bulma lmao. and the fact that they included the “big soft-spoken man gets mad and saves girl from drunk lowkey-rapey pervert” trope just had me roll my eyes like dude stop. Lemo was fine? Nothing against him but didnt do much for me either.

FUCK. FREEZA. i went over this one before too so ill be quick with this as well. I hate hate hate the fact that they brought him back not once but twice in DBS, but even worse that they left him alive to do whatever tf he wants including going back to mass murdering people and expanding his army again. Goku and Vegeta just LET HIM LIVE. Why tf did they go all out and attack Broly, but not Freeza? when one of them was fighting Broly th other easily could have taken out freeza but nope we need a token villain like Joker or Skeletor cause unoriginality. Even at the end, Gogeta does a full power blast to wipe Broly tf out, but when Freeza tries to kill Cheelai and Lemo (two innocent people, feelings on them aside) Gogeta basically just shakes his finger like nuh-uh! dont do that! and then he flies off. Just let this mfer die already im sick of seeing his ass. FUCK I HATE IT SO MUCH GFGFFGFGFGF

Lastly this movie is legitimately Dragon Ball Fanservice The Movie.

Gogeta vs Broly, which the games have been doing since fucking 2003, is the main point of this film. Theres no originality whatsoever. Minus is discount Father of Goku special, and then its a mashup of Broly LSSJ and Fusion Reborn (both of which are superior movies imo). This creatively banrkupt shell of a franchise cant think of anything new, so they legit remake an old movie, through in fusions because that sells like hotcakes, and make the animation pretty because thats all that matters.

Imo, this movie, like 99% of Super, is all flash and flair but no substance at all. At least this movie looked nice. unlike the show.

ok thats all i got lmao

#this got really long lol #longer than i intended #but thought of more stuff as i went #asks #cozymochi

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potuzzz · 4 years

Text

I can’t fucking do this.

I can’t play this game.

I’m so tired.

I can’t do anything I want. I don’t even know what I want.

All I know is that anyone who’s ever given me a reason to smile feels infinitely far away right now, and I’m left with a cold, unforgiving world that values things that I simply cannot give.

I don’t even want to leave the cesspool, because of knowing there are people like me I’d leave behind. Fuck I think I just want to die. I think everybody just has to die. Thank God I believe in the immortal soul and a relatively good afterlife because if I didn’t I don’t know what the despair would do to me.

It’s so ugly. I cannot even look at it.

I was a knight, and I was stripped, and now, I do all the things I scoffed at. All the things I promised myself I would never do.

I’m just sitting here mindlessly fucking around on the same 3 websites, nothing is changing, I’m just melting my brain in hopes that it will dull some of this horrible feeling.

But this visceral feeling is deeper than that. It’s deeper than surface emotions. It’s in my fucking soul. my soul is on fire and thers nothing left on this world to put it out. theres nothing that brings mejoy. i dont care. even if something pops up right now that would make me feel better, it will be fucked. it will all exist for the wrong reasons. i cannot even, for example, hope to meet a random new friend, because i cannot make new friends. it has, tried-and-tested proved to be impossible. im too broken. my mind just doesnt function the same way. if they dont hate and reject me, i will hate and reject them. i will pour everything into a rose colored illusion i project, and be viscerally, cripplingly disappointed when i finally dare to remove the veil.

im slowly accepting the veil. i was told by so many powerful entities that i must not submit to apathy. but im sorry. im too high maintenance. i just cant do it. i cant do anything i promised of me. at least, i sincerely doubt it. i just cant. i cant change the world for better. i can even be nice anymore. i forgot how to be nice, “stop being nice” they said, “ you need ot take care of yourself. you need to fight back against this ugly world.” well now im ugly and i cant go back. i used to be naive and unjustifiably forgiving and cringey and annoying and unhealthily passive and pathetically submissive and i fought those things just to become the thing i hated. and now im turning into a young adult and my formative window is over. i cant change myself. i can only hope to get a fucking aneurysm from the stress of just being sober or of not actively participating in self destructive behavior. im so tired. let me destruct. let me go out in a blaze of glory, an explosion, dont let me die softly with a pathetic whimper before fading nonchalantly into the background, to be easily forgotten. what a curse.

just let me stop working, fuck. either let me be a sheep, a slave, a workhorse, trained to rationalize on my own accord how everythings okay and im the main character and its all gonna be good and cool, but dont fucking put me in this middle ground. dont leave me alone with the darkness and then make me hop back and forth back. this is dehumanizing. this is...this isn’t fair. if they came to hear me beg, they’ll be satisfied. allow me the small dignity. allow me this one fucking thing.

take it out of my hands. put me in a war. a big one. one where i can pretend that im doing something good, fighting for something bigger than myself. one where i have comraderie with people who i would easily hate in an other siutuiaton. youb know, bdy conditioning class in ghigh school was fucking great for this reason. all these shitty peole who would bully me, who would hold me in the loewst, cruelest form of contept, who would even continue this view of me at the beginning,w e all became equals through the trials of fire. imagine what bonding could be had over death and squallor and rage and intense, immeasurable, uunignorable suffering.

that’s the fuckign problem with the is world . all the suffering is way too damn weasy to ignore. death by a billion paper fcuts. slice me asuner with a fork of lightning, dont give me this undignified death. its cruel, pointlessly cruel. you lose nothing buy giving me somthoing dignified.

i cant even fucking sleep. i cant even have my own self for comfort, me versus the world baby. noep. its dead. i cant even talk to ymself. i cant even look at myself, as if ive done something wrong, when ive literally not done antyhting wrong, buefcause i havent done a fucking thing. i dont areif this is hyperbolic.

im so tired of saying the same words over and over

im so tired of seeing the same 5 different types of peopl,e

im so tired of being disappointed. show me something whimsical. something truly magical. something awe inspiring. terrigying. attack me in my dreams. rip my soul out its soft, comgfy shell, and thrust it into the sky, that visceral discomfort. am ai really a coward beause i didnt go sky diving or something? i dont know. am i ca cowrard because i stopped allowing myself...WHATEVERT THE FUCK WOULD HAPPEN IN MY DREAMS???? I DONT NOW!

blah blah blah wow noah this is going to be so useful in your brand building campaign wow hahaha youre so cool oure going to be famous boy! FAMOUS BOY! youre gong to be big and famous and universally olloved! everyone will be yor friend! eveerything woikll work out in the end. nbody you love will ever die or ever hate you. it all works onut in the end. it all works out in the end.your going to be GFAMOUS DUDE LAOL HAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHH HAHAHAHAHAHAHA THIS IS ACTUALLY MAKING ME SMILE!

DUDE, FUCK YOU!

FUCK OFF!

FUCK OFF! FUCKI OFF!

WOW THIS IS GOING TO BE GREAT FOR THE ALGORITHYM THIS IS GOING TO LOOK SO GOOD ON THE RATIOS AND THE METRICS AND THE RED LINE GO WEEEEEEEEEEEE EAYAYAYAYAYAYAYAYAYAYAYAYAY THIS IS GOING TO LOOK SOOOOO GOOOOD ON YOIR PORTFOLIO WHERES YOUR PORTFOLIO CAN YOU LINK EM TO THE SONG DUDE YOU JUST GOT TO LNK ME TO YOUG MUSIC MAN!!!! IM SURE ITLL BE GREAT ILL LOVE IT :) :) :) O))IK

fuck YOU

WHY DO I HAVE TO GO TO WORK TOMORROW LE ME STYA UP ALLLLLL NIGHT

ALLLLL NIGHT BABY THIS PATTY GOES ON ALLLLLLLL NIGHT

CAN I GET AN AMENE LOUDER FOR THE KIDS IN THE BACK

KIDS I N YOUR BACK ITS JUST THE KIDS IN YOUR BACK

YOU LL FEEL HOLY JUST HOLD STILL FOR THE

ahahhaahhaahahahahahahahahahahhahah

if you’ve killed yourself Your’e a Damn Hero a(TM) and im not nmade at you. not anymore. i used to be, sre, but now i get it. i fuckin get it my guy. how fucking 1st world of me to think you wouldn’t. honestly. its amazing uyou put up with what you did. you’re souch a good musiciain dude. HAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAH an ARTISSSSTTTTEEEEEEE I GOT THE BIG BRAIN BIG THINK TIME MY FEELINGS ARE IMPORTANT IM AN ARTISSSSSTTTTE

dont show your ASS FOR A SECOND OR THEYLL RIP YOU TO SHRED SBOY

just osme advice before the planks fdrtop

yeah just make sure you never do any of tis

dont hsow weakness for even a second

dont beg

dont you pathetic loser

just be happy

just make your life happyier

you know

they always this new bullshit ass looking way of things, the whole, “they killed themselves it woas outside of your control there is nothing theyhat you could have done it was doomed from the start they made the decision THEY made the decision

like literally fuck you dude. whatever you tell yourself to sleep at night.

you might just be a grain of sand, but a grain of sand is a lot more than 0/. i get to live every single day with my sin,s, they are variou s and many and oh boy they are GREAT. , if i may do say so myself. but i dont.

pause

more dirnk

*jeopardy song(

All i have is imagined scenarios. All i have is parasocial relationshiops. All i have is people im supposedly super close with that i feel a constant need to hide gfrom.

you don’t know me. and when i let the mask slip for a seocnd you are repulsed. fuck you.

i’d like...i liked to think it was because i was special. because i did omthing outside of the norm, that brought this...new thing that had to be contended with...HAD to be contended with...for the human speices to evolve. i was just a small LEOG brick in the gram dn sceneme of things, sure, but i was an actaual...i was a VESSEL. I was a VEHICLE>. now what am i. nothing. a waste of tiem.e a waste of love and anergy and resources. of hope. how dare you hope for me. you have no idea. luck is in not many people’s favor but i dont even have the money for the lottery tickets. i wouldnt even know how to read the numbers if i wanted to. i’d be too much of a prudish, self-centered, egotistical, unbearably annoying hipster to use the numbers even if i could read them, and i know this to my fucking core. it’s like i’d rather ...

FUCK THIS HALFWAY POINT

THE HALFWAY POINT BETWEEN SLEEPING AND AWAKENING IS HELL

AND I HAVE SETTLED PERMANENTLY ON IT

for why?

SPITE

I SWEAR TO GOD BECAUASE I CAN THINK OF NO OTHER RESOASN.

it doens’t matter.

i have to stop typing and go to bed.

and shut my eyes.

and sit in silence.

alone.

so alone.

and wait for sleep to take me.

and then wake up and flip burgers.

it has to happen. i cant stay up all night. i’ll fucking die tomorrw. i wish i could just stay uo all night.

amyabe i should? like i mean seriously, accelerationist based shit but like, maybe i just need to lose my job just to...rip the bandaid off.

everyone, im sorry if youre reaing this, i;m okay. im just in a rough spot. im sorry, please ignore this. im sorry.

#doubleups

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thefeckisthis · 4 years

Text

hello darkness my old friend.

well im not quite sure why this title nor what exactly am i going to write about, i just had the need to write. ever had that feeling? no? oh. ok.

its been a while since last post, many things had happened, fun, annoying,stressful, interesting and so on and some may expect sassy posts like first two and thats not going to happen with in this one, sorry not sorry. ive been feeling the need to write about anxiety, not entirely sure why, just a feeling in me telling me to do so so lets see where it goes.

apologies for spelling mistakes because in these last couple of sentences ive had so many red lines that makes me think can i even spell -_- (hello brain, you there?) confidence is a tricky things. you are not born with it, you have to build it up. god knows i had no confidence before and i still struggle with it sometimes, especially with my anxiety - sometimes it can affect it really bad. when anxiety, i want to talk about because i think these kind of things should be talked about.

my anxiety levels are still not alarming but they are at that level when it can definitely affect my daily life, especially on bad days. ive definitely learned how to cope with it, sometimes it cant be helped. i definitely suffer from GAD (general anxiety disorder https://adaa.org/understanding-anxiety/generalized-anxiety-disorder-gad) with medium to high social anxiety - https://adaa.org/understanding-anxiety/social-anxiety-disorder (which many people don’t believe heh) and ive discovered some unusual phobias that I have also count as anxiety issues (trypophobia, Emetophobia, fear of knives are some of mine examples) so it can vary from person to person.

(imagine having all those on almost daily basis, yaaay)

i know, lots of people will say ah everyone is tense and stressed, we all must have anxiety. no, just dont. its not the same. occasional stress is normal, anxiety is completely different. its not easy to be in constant worry phase, being triggered by small things (coffee can easily trigger mini panic attacks, been there done that), small inconveniences, theres so much to it.

another awful part of it is overthinking. that is what used to kill me and mess up relationships i had with people. one small thing can set you back so much. as ive mentioned, some people learn how to deal with it and some people seek for help, and both of those things are amazing. letting it affect you is not amazing.

talk to someone, youre not alone.

i always tell people to not be afraid to talk to me about their problems, because i do know how it is, i do understand. i had some people who dont understand as much as they think they do and when id open up to them they would say just stop worrying, its ok.

uuuhm like no. thats the whole point. my brain cant stop worrying. thanks for letting me on deepest secrets of the world, appreciated. high chances are that we do actually know that but its sometimes impossible to stop worrying. if i could do that so easily i wouldnt be suffering from anxiety, right?

do i have panic attack? yes i do. had more before, now it got down to 2-3 in 6 months, so thats around 6 a year. last year i had full blown panic attack, worst that i ever had, my whole body just shut down and i was crying for full on 45mins, not being able to breathe, talk or move. sounds fun, eh? and lets go back to social anxiety, as ive said people say that i dont seem like an introvert or that i have any struggles with that.

i do tho. i just dont let it be stronger than me. my head and my body in social situations can be in full panic mode but ill be there sitting with smile on my face. there were social gatherings or parties where i would end up sitting on my own, trying to fight tears and the emotions in me would be bubbling and getting worse and my common sense would be trying to fight them, thats why i end up sitting in corner like a weirdo. meting new people? socializing? that doesnt sound fun for me at all, i usually just avoid situations like that. i will talk most of the time and joke and its just because my common sense is trying to fight anxiety while at the same time my anxiety is trying to take over. i wish i can explain what is going on in my head.

if you invite me to go somewhere with you, dont leave me. please. thank you.

it has also affected my job, if i get a task im not sure what to do, or im told to just amend something, i just wish to get up and leave until my head gets clear. ive noticed small things i tend to do when i feel that anxiety is getting higher than i want it to be, eg ill start picking at my nails, ill bite my lip till it hurts, just shut down and stare blankly, taking deep breaths, shaking my hands to stop them from shaking (weirdly i think itll shake off my stress), do weird stuff with my hands, or all combined. rare people noticed all the things and actually knew when i was starting to get my anxiety attacks and they were really helpful.

how to help someone if you see them starting to have anxiety attack?

people deal with anxiety different ways, dont just assume one thing will help everyone. - for example hug wont make me calm, im not a fan of human touch in general and hugging me when im having an attack will only make me more stressed and more triggered and itll make everything worse. - dont force the person to talk about it, rather just ask them if they want to talk about it, if they dont, please dont leave them, just sit there in silence that means a world. -if they do want to talk about it, never, and i repeat never say dont worry its nothing or just stop worrying and think happy thoughts.

- talk with them about it, or let them talk. ask what is the issue, why does it make them feel that way, just try to find solution slowly. - if a person starts crying, let them cry. crying is amazing way to release the tension and it will help the person to feel more at ease - if you do notice early signs of anxiety attack, change the environment, divert the person, make them think of something different

- dont make the person walk or do something they dont want to, it will cause things to go worse, personally ill probably just sit and curl up and cry my eyes out but for the love of god dont touch me or make me walk, my body is just not able and its causing more stress

- after the attack calms down, let person go on with their life, dont talk about it straight after. let them fully calm down. some people (most cases me) will be ‘normal’ after the episode (after my big one i straight away started joking how disgustingly runny my nose was from crying) and some people will take a bit longer

We are all different in handling the situations. Anxiety like every other disorder is not easy and it has to be taken seriously. If you have it, if you know someone who has it, please talk to those people. Be supportive. Dont make them feel like there is something wrong with them. Small conversation and an ear to listen can go a long way.

be a friend and be a human.

#new post #new blog #anxiety #panic attack #mental heath support #mental health #support #be human #friends #talk to someone #talk to me #Followme

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spearxwind · 5 years

Text

>:)ccc exactly as intended

jdkfdhjkk ok but. this is a REALLY big compliment,, its literally my whole intent w him just.. he’s rly scary and there’s no getting around that, no matter how many shitposts i do or how much he pretends

im so glad i can actually make him FEEL scary though gosh

thank you so much!!! i just love my friends a lot i would Die For Them but that would make them unhappy so i can Live For Them

that being said, if anyone wants to fuck up my face hmu but u gotta be willing to go out in an epic fight, just saying

cries thank u sm im so grateful for them,, and im grateful for everyone who’s happy for me it really really means a lot. i want to be able to express my love for my friends without people guilting me about it. i want it to be something people can relate to, or look forward to rather than something to be jealous about

i was in such a place as well!! and i had been for so many years, to a ridiculous point

for a multitude of reasons i lost or cut contact with all my friends and i was just. really not where i was supposed to be, quite literally. that was my big problem but then ive switched majors, to someplace i AM supposed to be; and got out of a bunch of different shitty situations and fought to be in better ones until i managed

and here i am!! things always get better dude. you’re always going to find people to love and care for, and who love you and care back. it might take a long time, but itll happen. sometimes ir requires more things to change but itll happen. you absolutely will find good friends dude, i believe in you

sobs its quite honestly all i wanted and all i could hope for

also! we just all met through this site, either through art or mutual friends/follows or just... some sort of contact. we all kinda knew of and followed each other for a good while though but not much else (id been in a few mutual public servers w others but ultimately left). i made a server a lil while ago and just invited them all there, bc i liked them a lot and wanted to get to know them better.

i was terrified that they might not want to join but they all did and .. it was just uphill from there honestly

you didnt make me mad, i know what you meant, but in doing that you ARE quite literally invalidating me.

im expressing that im upset at something shitty that happened to me, and you go “okay but... what about the shitty things that happen to other people huh???” its a topic horribly out of place to say the least, and even if you did not mean to white knight my post but it very much came across as that, or alternatively, you trying to pull an “all lives matter” on me ((for lack of a better term, sorry))

you said “im not talking about where people obviously copy your designs ... etc“ and thats absolutely right. its what, again, I was talking about, and you came out of left field with something else. if you wanted to talk about this other topic itd have been fine, but preceding your previous ask topic with “not to say people dont do this to you but....” ties it to MY post, so either way, you threw a completely out of place message at me

and literally all the things you mention here i addressed in my last response as well. i know what your intentions were but this has been an all around bad way to go about it man.

oh i meant i need a name for the whole story itself!! been toying with a few titles but nothing quite fits yet

oh!!! i followed them on here, but they apparently have an instagram account and a youtube channel? i havent checked those out, are they like,, the same kind of content? or does it vary with pics/audio/etc

oh!! man that sounds really really cool im def gonna look into it :O

#ask #anon #ask dump

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thekaijudude · 5 years

Note

Okay that matchup with Ultraman Taro vs Monster X was pretty dumb all things considered with how powerful Taro is. So here’s a better matchup (at least I hope so anyway) Ultraman vs Monster X

Nah it wasn’t dumb at all

Its ok to ask such questions as not everyone knows how strong Taro truly is (surprisingly), so asking these sorts of questions helps to inform more people and/or clear up any misunderstandings some may have with regards to any of the characters.

Ultraman is indeed a better match for X than Taro

But very few people know that Ultraman himself has rather unique abilities even amongst Ultras, one of which might very well dictate the course of this matchup.

That ability would be Ultraman’s immunity to electricity.

Assuming Destroyed Thunder are just bolts of electricity (going by its namesake) and not anti-gravity beams, X would have to entirely rely on his physical prowess to take Ultraman on.

However, if they aren’t, it wouldn’t actually matter as you’ll see later.

Clarification:

At this point, I would like to bring in a very common misconception that Ultraman seems to not be as physically strong as he is (judging from his stats).

But if one analyses his stats and the fights properly, you’d realize that most of the time, Ultraman always holds back and he always seems to struggle against most of his opponents which are physically much weaker than him.

Firstly, people always like to say that his brute strength is only about 100 000t but if you look closely, its stated to be at least 100 000t. In addition, the stats were for the 1966 incarnation of Ultraman, which is not updated.

Secondly, expanding on the point of him holding back, if you analyze his fights more carefully, when Ultraman gets serious, the tides of the battle goes south extremely quickly if the kaiju was originally winning (which is apparent in virtually every single battle where the kaiju seems to hold the upper hand initially)

Another instance was when Ultraman had enough force to literally slice solid chunks of bone like what we see with Gomora.

Also, remember when Ultraman managed to generate enough energy to cause dimensional tears to overload Bullton’s (a 4D being) antenna? That’s essentially Dark Zagi level stuff which most people seems to be unable to relate as the original Ultraman series seems to just be some ancient piece of literature, but his feats are still definitely undeniable and he’s only much stronger now.

And let's not forget that Ultraman is likely to be the 'tank' of the Ultra Brothers as his durability is said to be 100x tougher than Diamond

Ultraman vs Monster X:

Now more into Ultraman’s abilties, the main thing about him is that his defensive capabilities are actually scaled higher than his offensive abilities. In particular, is that he’s totally immune to any damage he takes that is less than the force of an atomic bomb.

With Ultraman’s physical prowess being more or less covered, lets compare them to X’s.

Monster X clearly took damage from Gigan’s buzzsaw which is definitely nowhere on the level of an atomic bomb.

X’s power output was more or less on the level of FW Godzilla’s which personally I would say is comparable to Ultraman (1966 version at least)

However, I would estimate X’s Destroyed Thunder would have a power output close to an atomic bomb as it was on the same level as FW Godzilla’s atomic breath which obliterated the meteor X was in.

But Ultraman can also teleport (short distance usage drains less of his power) and create duplicates of himself (said duplicates are as powerful and have the same abilities as the original)

Furthermore, Ultraman has those OP attacks whereby we see his Ultra Psychokinesis (which is more or less the ultimate plot device for the Showa Ultras tbh) which can literally immobilize kaiju, move them, and literally make them explode.

So although Ultraman and Monster X, in a pure hand to hand combat would definitely be something worth seeing, Ultraman’s OP abilities would make him abit too much to deal with for X.

However, if X evolves into Kaizer Ghidorah (KG), things would be different.

Ultraman vs Kaizer Ghidorah:

Although KG’s defensive capabilities are reduced to massively amp his power output, KG becomes ridiculously more capable in brute strength as compared to X. Like just a simple kick from KG could send a 55 000t FW Godzilla flying.

In addition, KG is stated to be the strongest ghidorah up till the point of FW, which would put him above the likes of Grand King Ghidorah and Thousand Year Old Dragon King Ghidorah (aka Mothra-Baragon amped GMK Ghidorah)

Considering that we only know Ultraman 1966′s brute strength was only stated to be at least 100 000t, I think its safe to say that he would surely be at a losing end against KG in a physical fight.

As KG now also has some form of psychic abilities with his now evolved ‘Destroyed Kaiser’ which although not as precise as Ultraman’s psychokinetic abilities, Destroyed Kaiser acts as a ranged attack as well as a psychokinetic attack.

Also, KG can also drain the energy of whoever he managed to sink his teeth in which is of course very, VERY bad news for any Ultra on Earth as Ultraman already has a time limit of 3 mins which is short enough already.

So I guess its safe to say that once KG manages to get hold of Ultraman either by his Destroyed Kaiser or his teeth, its essentially game over at that point.

The only few factors I can think of that would work into Ultraman’s favour is that if he managed to decapitate one of KG’s heads using his Ultra Slash which would disorient KG is his middle head was decapitated, and Ultraman could leverage on that moment of disorientation to freeze KG’s movements and launch a barrage of ranged attacks on him to take advantage of KG’s reduced defense or take the opportunity to escape into space to recharge his energy and repeat the process to slowly decapitate all of his heads.

Or if the battle occurs in space, Ultraman would not have to be affected by the time limit and he could also move much faster in space but itll still be a very, very tough fight for Ultraman 1966.

Conclusion:

In conclusion, X vs Ultraman 1966 would be a close fight with the latter likely emerging victorious, KG vs Ultraman 1966 would all depend on whether Ultraman can utilize his experience to outsmart KG as he’s up against KG’s massive power output.

(Note that im not talking about the current Ultraman as unlike Taro, its much more difficult to estimate how much more powerful he got since 1966, but tbh, I would say that modern Ultraman would manhandle X but KG would still pose a significant challenge to him)

Thanks for the question!

#ultraman #godzilla #asks

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littlemisssquiggles · 6 years

Text

RWBY Remarks: Debunking Some of the Negativity Surrounding the CRWBY Writers and RWBY V6

keyenuta asked “ Based on the crews recent track record what do you expect the next volume will be like? Do you think itll disappoint people like the previous volume or will it exceed our expectations. Or is it gonna be mediocre. Also I am curious, why is it that there are so many, I wouldn't say rwby bashing videos. But rwby videos that seem to just say that the characters are bland or they already ruined a character etc etc. I was curious if I could get your opinion on the subject because I've enjoyed rwby “

@keyenuta

Hello Keyenuta. I’m sorry I took so long with this response. I had planned on answering you since last weekend however between finishing my second semester of school and being down with the flu last week; I didn’t get the chance. But I’m doing better now so without further ado, let’s get into this =D

“…Based on the crews recent track record what do you expect the next volume will be like? Do you think itll disappoint people like the previous volume or will it exceed our expectations…?”

Well…contrary to what other fans might think, personally I don’t believe the CRWBY Writers did as poor of job as others have expressed. While I admit that the Mistral Arc wasn’t as well put together as its predecessor in the Vale Trilogy, I will also admit that the Mistral Arc wasn’t entirely a train wreck. I have been recapping all five seasons of RWBY in preparation for my own full review of V5 which will also discuss my thoughts on the Mistral Arc as a whole. And in doing so, I recognized that where the writers truly fell short wasn’t really in their ideas but mostly in the execution of those ideas.

I have no doubt that Miles and Kerry have zero problem in coming up with good ideas for stories to be added to the full narrative for RWBY. My concern is how they chose to go about portraying those ideas especially if they are meant to be continuous plot points to be progressed or delved further on in other consecutive seasons. Not to mention their ability to tie into plot points that date back to the Fall of Beacon storyline where Monty was a still a part of the writing team.

In my recap, I noticed that there were certain ongoing stories, particularly for certain main characters that have been ongoing since the Beacon Days that were completely, for lack of a better term, retconned or worse, completely forgotten/erased for the sake of progressing the Mistral Arc.

It is because of this why I was left concerned for the writing for RWBY. Not for the writers’ ability to write a good story but how they are able to tie everything together.

To me, a good story, specifically a good long story, is like a jigsaw puzzle. No matter how many plot points are created to expand the story, you have to make sure that everything is lined up properly and fits together in a way that not only makes sense according to the established lore of the story but additionally answers any and all questions that the audience might have regarding that particular plot point. You understand?

Because just like a puzzle, if you have one too many faulty plot point out of the place, then you really can’t complete the story you were trying to tell and instead you’re just left with a whole bunch of unfinished parts that mostly leaves the audience confused and dissatisfied.

That was the defining difference between the Beacon Arc and the first 2/3 of the incomplete Haven Arc for me. Though you can say it’s more or less almost finished since the major part, which was the Battle of Haven, has been concluded as of last season. Anyways, the Vale Trilogy was a textbook jigsaw puzzle where all the plot points that represents its pieces that were set up during the course of the first two volumes leading into the third lined up and fit together flawlessly to create the perfect masterpiece of a storyline.

The Mistral Arc, so far, on the other hand has been the opposite. Though the writers did a decent job of setting up its plot points in V4, where it failed was in the season after. As much as I hate to admit; though I initially enjoyed V5, it is the season that was responsible for the most of the complaints from the fandom and in my recap of the seasons, I can understand why.

I haven’t finished recapping V5 as yet. However, my memory of the events of the season is still fresh enough in my mind to comment that V5 did not do a good job in expanding on the plot points introduced in V4.

On the contrary, I could say it pretty much forgot, rewrote or worst killed---like legitimately killed off any and all chances for stories from V4 and in some cases, V3, to be progressed further.

One of example I can give off the top of my head is what they did for Yang’s story with Raven. I did not particularly enjoy how within the span of one season, the writer’s completely ‘changed’ Yang’s motives. Part of Yang’s story as established from previous seasons has surrounded her learning truths and answering questions about her mother she wanted to ask. Throughout V1-V3, you felt Yang’s desperation and need to understand why her mother chose to leave her and her father behind.

Not to mention that you felt a sense of appreciation and respect from Yang for wanting to hear her mother’s rationale for leaving from her mouth rather than getting upset and angry at the thought of her mother leaving before hearing her out. It was a different perspective that I quite liked from Yang. I always got the impression that Yang was never resentful of her mother. She was confused, maybe even a little angry at her mother leaving but never to extreme levels. She always expressed more of curiosity and honest understanding at wanting to hear her mother out first before judging her actions entirely which is something I really liked.

Which is why I was so pissed when the writer’s decided to change this in V5. So, it honestly felt like a slap to the face when the writers decided to throw that aspect of Yang’s character out of the window to give us an alternative that just felt rather…uncharacteristic of Yang; despite the scars left on her personality by the events of V3. I’ll elaborate more on this in my view but you get what I’m saying here, right?

In the end, instead of feeling like a good story, the Haven Arc left us with a story that felt lacklustre especially when compared to its predecessor. Then again, it isn’t fair for me to judge the Mistral story as yet because, in hindsight, we still have one more chapter in Mistral Arc to complete.

If there is one thing I’m hoping for in V6 is that it provides a proper conclusion that ties in everything introduced for the Mistral story between both volumes 4 and 5. So I’m anticipating V6 to be the official end to the Mistral Trilogy/ Haven Arc while simultaneously commencing the Atlas Arc/Trilogy.

That’s why I have been advocating passionately that the writers take time to properly wrap up the story in Mistral before heading towards Atlas. To me, V6 is the Writers’ chance to renew the fandom’s faith in them by giving us a story that’s, not perfect, but at least feels complete y’know what I mean. There are still storylines to be wrapped up in the Mistral side of the story and I really hope that V6 focusses on them above anything else.

I’m not looking forward to V6 because I want it to be a masterpiece of animation with better fight scenes or what not. I mean if we get improved fight animation that that’s a nice plus, yes. However what I truly want for the new season is a better written story that in hindsight not only set things up for what’s to come for the Atlas Arc but most importantly, gives a proper conclusion that at least tries to fix the mess that was created from the two earlier seasons.

I want a better written story that gives us more focus on character who haven’t been properly fleshed out while finally tying back into plot points left forgotten from past volumes. Pineheads like me have been aching for more, better, Oscar development. Give us that. The reason why I keep bringing up Oscar is because of all the characters in the hero group, he has the most tied to Mistral.

Sure Lie Ren also has ties to the kingdom. But Ren’s story was given a good conclusion back in V4. Now it’s Oscar’s turn. Oscar’s story began in Mistral and of all the characters; his part of the story deserves a proper conclusion. We need to learn more about him while simultaneously learning more about Ozpin so it doesn’t feel like Ozpin’s story is constantly eclipsing Oscar’s.

I hated how that was handled in V5 so I hope the writers find a better way to balance that out for V6.

My fault with V5 was that there were plot points introduced in V4 that was supposed to be progressed in V5 but just wasn’t. The pressure that V6 has is that not only does it have to continue the plot from V5 but it also has to tie up areas that were introduced in V4 that was supposed to be done in V5 but never happened. I’ll give you an example of one: Oscar’s individual character development!

Sorry if I keep bringing this up. It’s just that…after V4, I was really expecting V5 to out Oscar’s character a bit more but instead he ended up taking a backseat to Ozpin for most of the season.

Disagree with me if you will but I do not think it will be a wise idea for the writers to leave the story the way it is. They need to fix the puzzle.

As for any concerns or opinions I might have for V6. Wellll….

Listen, I’d be lying if I said I didn’t have my own fair share of worries for V6 coming out of V5. My worry is that the writers will make the same mistakes they made V5. V4 wasn’t a problem. The zinger was in the last volume, sadly to say. That being said, I do want to stay positive and hope that V6 will be the season to give the Mistral Arc a fitting conclusion while moreover giving us a really great season.

At RTX 2018 back in August, Miles and Kerry promised the audience that they had acknowledged their mistakes from the last two seasons and are working on correcting them for V6. To me, I saw that as a positive sign. It tells me that not only did they acknowledge their shortcomings but they also started trying to fix them. This led to them getting feedback and input from trusted CRWBY members outside of the writers’ room. Not to mention that Kerry said that he’s also getting assistance with the directing of RWBY because he now has a co-director. Again, as a fan, I took that as positive note. At least, I want to look at these changes as positive and no words can describe, how much I really want V6 to be a good season.

Not just for my enjoyment but purely because, I sincerely want the FNDM’s faith in the CRWBY Writers to be restored. I want to return to a more peaceful time where the FNDM praised RWBY for its writing and colourful cast of character rather than picking it a part like corbeaus to a carcass.

Talking about Miles and Kerry specifically, I understand that the writing for the last two seasons was not their best. Nonetheless, this doesn’t mean that the writers aren’t doing they’re doing their best. From what I’ve seen between V4 and V5, the CRWBY Writers are trying. I get it. Things aren’t the same without Monty, yada, yada, blah, blah, blah…

But y’know what? Miles and Kerry, a.k.a Monty’s friends and co-writers, are trying. They are still trying to keep the story that they made TOGETHER with their old friend alive. It pains me when I can acknowledge that they’re trying and see the good in what they’re producing but there is that one special fraction of the FNDM family that just focuses primarily on all the bad and therefore, continues to beat these two guys’ names into the dirt for it. I guess you could say it comes with the industry but that’s not gonna stop me from saying it’s messed up.

Not only did I see the good in the story but also the greatness in the group of creative minds that season after season, pour their heart and soul into making this series a reality. I guess my next point ties into my answer for the second half of your question.

“…Also I am curious, why is it that there are so many, I wouldn't say rwby bashing videos. But rwby videos that seem to just say that the characters are bland or they already ruined a character etc etc. I was curious if I could get your opinion on the subject because I've enjoyed rwby…”

If I had to guess then it’s probably because, hating on RWBY is surprisingly more popular than liking RWBY over on Youtube, believe it or not.

I don’t fully understand it myself but I guess that’s how it is on the internet, I’m afraid fam. I honestly don’t have an opinion of why there are so many ‘RWBY Bashing videos’ because that would be like justifying why these fans have that kind of opinion of RWBY which I can’t do because I can’t speak for these fans.

A fan’s opinion is their own. I can only speak for myself and justify my own rationale for things while respecting the opinions of other fans whether I agree with them or not.

I’m just like you Key. I’m a fan of RWBY. I’ve been watching the series since its very first season and I still continue to watch it til this day. To be honest, I first started watching RWBY because like many, I was a big fan of Monty Oum. I’ve been a fan since I was first introduced to his crossover fan-animation series: Dead Fantasy and I absolutely loved how he was able to sell a story purely on amazingly choreographed and animated fight scenes alone. So when I later discovered that Monty had his own original series with RoosterTeeth, I definitely jumped onto the RWBY bandwagon.

But I’ll let you in on something. Something that I didn’t even realize until now. When I first started watching RWBY, I mainly watched it for the fight animations because I knew that was Monty’s speciality and that’s what I mostly came to RWBY for. Back then, my mind-set was, it didn’t matter what the story of RWBY was, I just wanted to see the fights. I mean yes, I did like some aspects of the story like the characters and the soundtrack. The OG V1 theme will always be my favourite (but I think it might’ve been dethroned by V5’s theme). I remember liking Team JNPR more than I did Team RWBY actually. I was just always more interested in them because I liked their personalities over the main four girls. You can almost say that back then, I didn’t care much for the story of RWBY. Not like I’m saying it was bad. I just didn’t focus too much on the story and just enjoyed RWBY for what I liked seeing most from it, which were the awesome fights.

It just dawned on me that I never truly focused on RWBY for its story or its characters. Admittedly, V5 was the first time in my entirety of watching RWBY where I actually paid the most attention to the story and the characters. I guess that’s one positive I have for V5. In a add way, it revived my interest in the lore of RWBY and its world building in respect to the stories and characters.

That’s why I had to go back and rewatch the entire series---something I’ve never done before. Before, I always just watched the newest season and didn’t return to RWBY again until the new volume premiered. I’m not really one to go back and rewatch episodes of shows I’ve watched, not unless I really enjoyed it.

The first time I watched RWBY, I fell in love with it mainly for the fights. However in my second viewing of the series, I realized that there is a truly amazing story with a cast of great characters to be loved from this show.

And this isn’t something that only happened in the early seasons of RWBY. It’s something that’s been on-going for years and still continues to progress even in its later seasons.

I guess what I’m trying to say overall is that I’m still here for RWBY. Again, I can’t speak for the haters or the disappointed fans who talk ill of the show. The people who shit on RWBY and I’m not talking about the people who constructively critique RWBY, I mostly referring to the ones who literally pick it apart and burn everything there is to do with the show---I cannot speak for these people, at all. I can’t even speak for the peeps who share in my enjoyment of RWBY. This squiggle meister can only speak for herself. And as I’ll repeat again, I’m still with Team RWBY. I’m still very much interested in following the adventures of Team RWBY and Team JNPR as they travel Remnant combating the Grimm and Salem with her forces of evil.

Yes; I acknowledge that the show has changed since the days of Monty, both for the good and the not-so-good.

Yes; I acknowledge that the writing for the last two seasons was not the best. Yes; I acknowledge that the two most disliked seasons of RWBY by the FNDM just so happens to also be the two seasons that Miles and Kerry primarily worked on without Monty. Yes! I see all of these things.

But y’know what? …I’m not even mad.

That’s right. I’m not mad. I am not mad at the CRWBY Writers. I don’t hate the CRWBY Writers for the direction they took the show after V3. SHIT, I DON’T EVEN THINK THE CRWBY WRITERS DID AS A BAD OF A JOB AS OTHER FANS MAKE THEM OUT TO HAVE DONE.

This is only my opinion but even though I have my issues with V4 and V5′s story, that doesn’t mean I resent the CRWBY Writers. I may have my concerns for the story going forward based on the execution of the last season. However, that doesn’t mean that I’ve lost fate in the CRWBY Writers.

As a matter of fact, I have more reason to believe that they’ll do a much better job since they said they are working on things. Whether they’re telling the truth or blowing smoke up my ass, I can’t tell that for now. Not until V6 comes out. The age ole saying is that proof is in the pudding and I can’t judge the pudding if the pudding is still being cooked. I can’t even eat the pudding right now and thus give my honest opinion of how the pudding tastes if it’s still on the stove, y’know what I’m saying.

It’s for this reason also why I can’t give my opinion of how I think V6 is going to be. I can’t be one of those fans who are already starting to bash the CRWBY’s efforts for V6 before the season is even out. How am I supposed to judge something I haven’t seen as yet---again going back to the pudding analogy.

All I have for now are the promises from the CRWBY that they are going to do better job and to put it bluntly, I’d have to be a complete asshole to bash someone or a group of people who realize that they didn’t put their best work into something beloved by others before and rather than acting arrogant and deflecting blame, these people chose to do the just thing: keep moving forward using their mistakes as a learning opportunity to improve and work towards those improvements.

I don’t know about ya’ll but I can’t bash that. I can’t hate on that. All I can do is hope that the CRWBY live up to the promises made and wish for the best.

Saying something is going to disappoint me before I get a chance to see it, that’s not fair now is it? Never mind that previous outcome of the thing wasn’t the best. I get it. RWBY V4 or V5 or whoever was not the best. The writing has not been the best for the past two seasons---yada, yada! Whatever negative remarks has been said about RWBY within its past two volumes, I’ve heard it before. But you know what? That’s in the past. A wise animated character once said ‘You gotta put your past behind you’. Or as I’ll put it ‘Put your past in your behind and then shit it out therefore relieving thyself of the constipation of the past’.

In spite of the mess, RWBY is still going. Ya’ll realize that even though the Mistral Arc didn’t give us the best story, that even though Monty isn’t around in the flesh to oversee the progress of his creation, the series is still moving onward.

Why? Because there is still more to be told about from RWBY. A lot more and I don’t know about you, but I actually want to see how this continues.

To the people still singing that song about the story not being good without Monty and all that jazz, ya’ll need to be like Elsa in Frozen and please, PLEASE, let it go.

I get that folks were disappointed. However, like I said, the story is still going. The saga still continues which means that there will be more opportunities for the story to get better. And y’know what? I want to stay positive and believe that the story is going to recover going forward.

There is still a lot more to come from the main RWBY-verse and I’d actually like to watch and hopefully enjoy what the story has next in store for me going forward.

Do you know what’s even more disappointing? Regardless of whether V6 is genuinely good or not, thereos going to be that percentile who will be there to rip it apart and spew the same nonsense we’ve been hearing all along. Not to give bad press to the FNDM community but I wouldn’t mention these fans if I’ve never heard them myself. The ironic part is that these types of fans are the most vocal, not only in the FNDM fam but in others fandoms as well.

At the end of the day, despite the faults in the past two seasons, the CRWBY Writers still managed to achieve the penultimate objective that every ongoing story is supposed to do. Keep me as the audience member tuning in invested in the story.

Through all the mess, I admittedly am still interested in RWBY. I still want to know more about story. I still love the characters and most importantly of all, I am still very much on board with the plot that Miles and Kerry continue to create together.

Miles and Kerry have always been an intricate part of crafting the plot for RWBY. That’s sometime that some of the more negative FNDM fam seemed to have forgotten. Miles and Kerry are as much the writing gods of the RWBY-verse as Monty, the show’s creator, was. And since Monty’s unfortunate passing, they are the two flames that continue to keep this story alive and burning bright.

And for what it’s worth, I’m still invested in the story that they have built thus far and continue to build. I want to know how this story ends and so long as I still have that curiosity, I will remain on the RWBY train.

I will continue to support the show because I honestly think it’s still great and hasn’t lost its spark. Y’see what I did there.

But it’s hard to feel hyped for what’s next to come in RWBY when there is negativity coming from the FNDM. The hate I’ve noticed within the FNDM is literally like being at an amusement park, excited to get on a fun new ride but also feeling uneasy about it too because there are some people in line already complaining about the ride before they even get on it.

And at this point, it has nothing to do with the ride itself. It’s on the people thinking those thoughts. Yeah sure you may have had a horrible experience the first time on the ride which left you feeling those thoughts. But this brings up another curious question. If you’ve been on a ride before and you realized that you didn’t like it because you didn’t enjoy it , then why return to get on it again?

It’s an honest innocent question I would like to toss out to the same FNDM fam I’ve seen shitting on the show and its writers. If you’re upset with the way RWBY has been these past two seasons then…why are you still talking about it? Nothing offensive just curious to understand why.

Why continue to follow the show if you’re constantly expressing your disappointment in it?

Because that’s another odd thing I’ve noticed about the so-called ‘haters’ in the FNDM. Despite voicing how much the show has disappointed them in the recent seasons, they STILL continue to follow the show as loyally as they ever did before, returning to rip apart some of the newer content the show puts out.

…That’s some weird love-hate vibes, for lack of better words. I don’t get it but like I said, I don’t speak for the haters.

All I know is that there are fans who have been so distraught with the treatment of the last two volumes that right now, they’re already starting to bash the upcoming season before it’s even out yet. This to me, is not a fair way to go.

To the fans who are like this, again I hear ya’ll. I understand that you guys are concerned for how the writers will handle V6 coming off of V5. I get that you’re worried. But in light of that, please be fair.

Don’t start spreading negativity for the new season before it’s even premiered. That’s not right.

Let V6 come out. Watch V6 and then give the final verdict. If the season turns out to be good, then awesome. Rejoice and give it the praise it deserves as your faith in the CRWBY Writers is restored.

However, if the season turns out to be a mess then…ok. Feel free to give your critiques and voice all the areas where the new season and the writers went wrong til your hearts’ content.

But for now, keep the negative vibes to a minimum please because for now, we really don’t know what’s to come of the new season until it premieres next month.

So for now, this squiggle meister would love to stay positive. I want to remain on the side that hopes the writers learnt from their mistakes and that they are indeed prepared to give us a season that is either really good or at least better than the season before. I want V6 to do well.

But until such a time comes, give the writers a chance guys. If you love RWBY and want the series to get better then believe in the people who are working to keep it alive. Give the CRWBY; ESPECIALLY THE CRWBY WRITERS; a chance and let’s hope for awesomeness.

And for what it’s worth, please for the love of all that is good and decent, STOP BLAMING Miles and Kerry for everything that went wrong with the past two seasons of the show.

I’ve seen a lot of that circling around too and it’s…not nice.

To get mad at Miles and Kerry is the same as getting mad at the entire CRWBY because at the end of the day, a lot of work goes into making an animated series. Take it from someone who has a little bit of experience working in the production of an animated web-series, the whole process is a team effort and to insult one aspect of the pipeline is to discriminate and neglect all the hard work put in by every member of the production team which is…a lot…definitely a lot more than people even realize especially if you haven’t worked in the industry before.

I’m just saying…it’s a lot easier for someone to single out one person or a pair of people, pointing fingers and blaming them for everything that went wrong than it is to understand and acknowledge that the thing they’re fighting for is a collaboration made by a team of people who utilize their talents and pour their heart and souls into the project at hand. So when you critique, criticize and to some worse extent, insult one part, you’re also collectively insulting the other parts too.

So what I’m saying here is, if you’re a disappointed fan who insists on blaming the writers for everything wrong with RWBY, the next time you decide the voice your disdain for the writers, please also take into consideration that by bashing the men who wrote the story, then by extension you are also bashing the folk who design the characters for the story that the writers wrote, the people who use animation to bring to life the world and characters for the story that the writers wrote and anyone else who works on RWBY. Because like I said, Miles and Kerry may write the story for RWBY but they don’t make RWBY by themselves.

RWBY isn’t just a by-product of Miles Luna and Kerry Shawcross alone. It’s not even just Monty Oum’s brainchild anymore.

Don’t get me wrong. Monty will always be known as the artist who created RWBY and no one can ever take that title away from him as he continues to rest peacefully. But what’s hurtful is that there are people, claiming themselves to be fans, who have come to downright disrespect the two gentlemen who were originally his brothers in bringing his story to life. Like I mentioned just now, Miles and Kerry or even Monty for that matter, did not make RWBY alone.

The series is a collaborative effort made by its creator, all three original writers and the talented people who make up the CRWBY within RoosterTeeth.

It’s alright to judge and be disappointed with RWBY as a series. As viewers we’re all entitled to give our opinions on the content we consume as entertainment. No fault in that. However when the disappointment goes so far and becomes so heinous that you literally start to attack two of the people who are helping to keep the series you claim to be a ‘diehard fan for’ alive, you’re not just insulting them and their efforts.

You’re also insulting the whole team and the work they contribute to RWBY which…in itself, is quite bad since you’re pretty much taking a dump over several months of hard work put together by a group of very passionate people who love and continue to do what they can for this series even with the recent hate it’s received.

Just saying.

Anyways, that’s pretty much my full $10 bucks on that topic.

I hope this answers your questions Key. Sorry it took so long and thanks for asking.

More Squiggles’ RWBY Content

~LittleMissSquiggles (2018)

#keyenuta #rwby #oscar pine #rwby volume 6 #roosterteeth #rwby remarks #squiggles answers: rwby

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perfectionistincrisis · 7 years

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Life these days!

Hmph :) So i have never..no let me write that in caps! So i have NEEEEVEEERRRRRRR (aha👌) felt this before. Like no, no its not cause i dont have a good vocabulary or something or like im not good with words or something, i mean those are not the reasons. But but i REALLY REALLY find it impossible to describe -IN WORDS- how much I feel for him. Like you know how somethings bugging you..Oh well everything bugs me.. And i DIEEE to tell him..But i cant🙃 So idk I just talk to myself maybe or like atleasr i have words i can use. But like those stuff are wordless. He means so much to mee.. And God!!!!!!! You have no idea how restless you feel when you have to keep such strong feelings suppressed within you! So normally I had some stuff to do. Like arranging my room, my clothes, my shoes, my stuff n all and i thought ill do them towards the end of vacation or in other words after my bro leaves which is like in 10 days but then i already feel like vacations ending. Now i dont mean that in a 'dramatic' way like you know, how your whole life every vaaction when its ending theres this sadness or happiness, well that depends. But like i mean there is some emotion you have towarss it and its like a "thing" like OH noo or oh yaaaayyy *dramatic* vacs almost over!!!!! Bleh -- yeah that ^ isnt there anymore. Cause like now im more of living life one day at a time. Like sure as hell i have plans/ dreams for future but when im 'living' a day at a time and you know that saying about how lifes a 'journey not a destination' - well ive been hearing it SO much since i was a kid. As in its such a mainstream quote that i just took it as something cheap and tacky w/o ever even realizing what it wants to say. I mean ok i do understand ehat it means but only now i can realize the 'depth' of it after experiencing life a bit. I think it means to say that life is ongoing, it will forever be until ofcourse we pass away. But like, then 'passing away' is the end point aka destination BUT nothing else before that is. So since passing away is certain we can ignore it and say that theres no 'destinatiom' in life. What we usually mistaken as destination are our 'dreams/ goals’ in life. But no, they are not destinations or end points. They are your targets. You want them, and yes you will adjust your life in order to focus and head towards your targets and youll be fighting for it and eventually you will reach it one day but. Your life will not end there. It does not end there. You keep living. New problems may come up. New targets will arise. So you see? Life is ongoing. May be these days youre living life but its not anywhere close to your dreams/ goals but BUTTTTT your life right now is also AS REAL as the life youre always picturing in your head. IT. IS. AS. REAL! so yeah life is ongoing. Its vacation now but yeah it wont be anymore and its not just the fact that it wont be vacation anymore but to add to that itll be SUPER hectic but yeah thats life and then before you know it therell be a vacation and then itll end and blaablaa. Life goes on!!!!! And you need to be okay with it and face anything that comes in your way with an open heart! I said face it. Means sometimes you need to accept, sometimes fight, sometimes struggle, sometimes cherish. Aha soooo ok lets get back to what i was sayin :3 Yeah so i mean its almost a month left, and for me i kind of feel like vac almost ending and i just dont really want to keep sruffs like cleaning and organisjng for the week before uni will start. So i did it this week. Also i kind of eat now. Like 'listen to my heartc typa eat. Like not apples and almonds and tea all day! So i also need to work out and so i decided this week i was going to focus on arranging my room, washing my scarves and all and my shoes and stuff and working out and eating and chilling. So well im not really done with it but its going ok. Also the reason i feel like vacation's almost over is because i finally came to know which 'rotation' i am going to start with in 4th year! So its like normally in 4th year there are 4 rotations. Surgery, Pediatrics, Internal Medicine and OB Gyne. So the females get the first 2 rotations that i mentioned above in semester 1 and the males get the last two. And in semester 2 females get last two and vice versa! Now within females/ males - you divide into 2 large groups. So 2 female groups - one starts semester 1 with surgery the other starts with peds. And similarly for males. So the whole batch is divided into 4 larges groups and at any time of the year all the 4 rotations are going on with different groups. Now lets talk about any ¼ group. So in that one group, theres roughly around 50 girls for example & they will start with lets say ‘surgery’. So now among those 50 girls, theyll need to make smaller groups of 5 members each so like 10 small groups of surgery. And now this 5 girls will be together for the whole rotation in the hospital. They go to see patients together. They meet the doctor together and everything. Only once a week there is ‘academic day’ on any specific day depending on your rotation and on that day all the 50 girls will have class at uni and like its a long day usually till 5 with many lectures by doctors. Aha so to summarize, that's how it all works! Now the thing is. People have preference. Like which rotation do you want to start with? Surgery or Peds? Haha Also, the thing is you dont get to decide! You just randomly form two big groups of equal number of girls and then they will assign a rotation randomly! But then people have preferences! Like some wants to start with surgery & some with peds. Now both has advantages & disadvantages! Surgery - ok this is hard! Its a fact, not my opinion! And it doesnt just end there! The doctors who teach surgery well let me rephrase..The “surgeons”! Well they're “surgeons” so they kind of expect you to know how everything works in the hospital right from Day 1 & they are less friendly, they teach less and expect you to know more! But if surgery is your 1st block how will you possibly know how things go in the hospital! So yeah you need to be alert always! Ok but the good side to starting with surgery is that since youre starting with it right after vacation youre all energetic and motivated and all and you can give it the attention and energy it really demands! But with time you seriously feel less motivated and its harder to study for uni! Well that is no excuse to slack off but then yeah in order to not slack off you need to work harder and harder! So thats the thing! Surgery is just easier to handle if started first but then the surgeons are the problem! Now peds. So yeah the things goods & bads of peds is the opposite of surgery! The doctors are extremely friendly and they teach but but peds is boring. Infact i personally hate peds and obgyne! So yeah! Now at first i wished i start with surgery but then with time I wanted peds. Cause like I really want to work hard for each and every block and so the timing of the rotation shouldnt matter! Whenever whatever comes, i have to face it and ace it! Simple as that. So if i start with peds I will also be able to start with friendly doctors and will have enough time to get to know how things work in the hospital rather than having surgeons who expect you to know everything on day 1! BUT BUT thats just my preference which switch from surgery to peds and anyways final say is not in my hands AND TO ADD TO THAT, more than what i preferred, i honestly left it more to Allah to give me whatever He thought was best for me. So like id say peds sounds good, but then I wouldnt like baaaaaadly want it and all like id be fine with either because im praying to Him to take care of it and help me through the entire path! Aha. So I got surgery! And i didnt feel bad even for a second. I mean. Oh surgery? Ok yeah cmon show me what you got!!!!!! :3 haha So yeah cause like now ik ill be starting eith surgery and then later peds. And like i mean just imagine like vacation started end of May and since then until beginning of this week youre completely clueless wth youll start the next year with and all is kinda confusing and then you finally know youll start with surgery. OHHHH! HOW COULD I MISSS THIS OUT. Like SURGERY!!! You GET IT????? Surgerys the REAL DEAL. i mean surgery is my thing. I never joined med school thinking ill be a ‘doctor’! I entered med school thinking ill be a ‘surgeon’ inshaAllah. AND it has never changed! So yeah! Now i never said it i think, but, i chose medicine because IN MY OPINION this is the most realistic way in which you are doing something for humanity which ultimately contributes to your religion i.e. to Allah and therefore for your own self for the Hereafter. I am aware that there are a zillion other ways to do so but i think this is number one on the list. Or if not 1 at least in the top 10! Now it doesnt end there. So first, i chose “medicine” for this reason. Now, yeah it doesnt end there. I want to be ‘involved enough’ in doing the job that i need to use to -use my own hands- to do so!!!! And thats nothing but surgery! Yeah! Thats basically what im about :):):) Aha okay so i started typing and then i keep talking talking talking and now idk what i wna say. Im all over the place looool Okayyy i need to go now! Just one thing i missed oh! Him. There's SO much of emotions stuck in me. SO Strong.. I dont think I have ever felt for him, or can ever feel for him AS MUCH AS I feel for him right now.. ❤

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wantweightloss · 5 years

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Why havent I lost weight after exercising? You asked Google heres the answer | Kate Carter

New Post has been published on https://weightlossguideto.com/must-see/why-havent-i-lost-weight-after-exercising-you-asked-google-heres-the-answer-kate-carter/

Why havent I lost weight after exercising? You asked Google heres the answer | Kate Carter

Every day millions of internet users ask Google lifes most difficult questions, big and small. Our writers answer some of the commonest queries

Honestly? The short answer is more than likely that you are consuming more calories than you are expending.

Of course there is a little more to it than that. It helps to know what type of exercise you are doing, how long you are doing it for, and at what intensity. But, for the vast majority of people, it is not the exercise part that matters most. Its what you eat. When it comes to weight loss, a good diet trumps exercise every time.

How much are you eating?

It might not be an easy truth, but study after study shows that people consistently underestimate the amount of calories that they consume. They forget the handful of nuts, or the cans of soft drink, or even just the fruit to tide them over to tea. Research from Harvard Medical School published in the BMJ found that, of more than 3,400 customers polled at fast food chains, more than a quarter underestimated calorie content by at least 500 calories. And over time that adds up along with the pounds.

Another thing worth considering: as well as underestimating calories consumed, most people tend to overestimate how much they burn through exercise. In a Canadian study, a group of recruits were told to eat the number of calories they thought they had just burned by working out. They ate two to three times as much.

Exercise is not a magic bullet. You cant and I speak, with regret, as someone who runs about 60 miles a week use it as carte blanche to scoff whatever you want. A 2011 study in the American Journal of Medicine put it starkly, isolated aerobic exercise is not an effective weight loss therapy. If you want to lose weight, you must first and foremost examine your diet.

But Ive worked up quite an appetite!

Our relationship with food is complex. Many of us again, myself included use treats as a reward. We think a long session in the gym, or a long run or bike ride, deserves a large plate of food as a reward. Yet much of this is in our heads, rather than our growling stomachs, and indeed exercise can actually be an appetite suppressant.

This is illustrated by another Canadian study dating from 1997. Three groups were chosen. One did high-intensity cardio, one low-intensity cardio, and a control group no exercise at all. The researchers asked all participants to then rate how hungry they were, before taking them to an all-you-can-eat buffet. There was no statistical difference either between how people in the various groups rated their hunger, nor how much they ate. In other words: no one actually worked up an appetite.

(An aside: swimming always strikes me as the worst culprit for this. Wonderful though swimming is, it almost always seems to make you starving afterwards, even if youve done very little other than sedately paddle around. Swimming in cold water, rather than an overheated pool, does burn more calories because your body is working harder to keep warm. However, it also stimulates your appetite more by up to 44%. So its pretty easy to consume more than youve burned after a swimming session. I love swimming and it has many other benefits, but as a fat or weight loss tool it is less effective than other forms of exercise.)

So what are you eating?

Another answer to the question is to look not so much at the amount you eat as what it consists of. Not least because some foods have a higher satiety index than others, and will therefore leave you feeling fuller for longer. A protein-rich diet with about 35% of your calories coming from a protein source seems to be the best way to combat hunger, fight muscle loss and generally feel smug and healthy.

This is not to buy into the carbs are evil myth. Carbs are an important part of a balanced diet, particularly if your chosen form of exercise is endurance-based. On the flip side, however, people who think they need to carb-load before endurance efforts should be aware that the body has more than enough stored in it for a good 90 minutes of exercise before you need to start thinking about topping up with gels or similar.

One in, one out?

Your heart rate monitor informs you youve burned 500 calories. A large bar of chocolate is roughly 500 calories. Ergo, you can eat that (in addition to everything else youre having) and not gain a pound, right? In truth, the trade-off is a more complicated than that.

In a study published in 2010 in Medicine and Science in Sports and Exercise, researchers at Louisiana State University recruited three groups of moderately overweight volunteers. One group as control, the second group cutting calories by 25%, and a third by 12.5% but increasingly their calories burned through physical activity to the same level: so the two latter groups had the same overall calorie deficit. What happened? Well, both group lost the same amount of weight. But the group who followed the 12.5% less calories/more physical exercise improved other health markers like cholesterol, blood pressure and insulin sensitivity. So, essentially, while a calorie is a calorie, and while diet is far more important for weight loss, you should exercise too because itll improve your overall health.

The myth of the fat burning zone

Anyone who has ever been on a cardio machine in a gym will have seen those heart rate graphs. You know, the bit with the weight management or fat-burning zone. Those who believe fervently in those graphs seem to worry that pushing themselves higher than that zone could have positively deleterious effects on their fat burning.

Sorry, but it doesnt work like that. The fat-burning zone is based on a misunderstanding of how our bodies work. When we exercise, we use both fat and carbohydrates stored in our cells. At a low level of intensity a walk or gentle cycle ride we burn more fat than carbohydrate. If we push harder, and longer, the proportion changes, switching over (dependent on fitness and age and so on) at about 60% of your max heart rate. This does not, however, mean we stop burning fat or even burn less fat when we go at it harder than that.

Yes, the ratio shifts, but at a higher intensity/duration you are burning more of both anyway.

And theres more bad news for those who believe in the fat-burning zone.

If you burn mostly carbohydrate during exercise, then when you eat afterwards, your body will convert those calories into carbohydrate to replenish what youve used. If you burn mostly fat, your carbohydrates stores will still be full. So, with no need to top them up, your body will store those calories as fat rendering your fat-burning efforts pretty redundant.

Just look at sprinters. They do much of their training at a very high intensities with long rest periods. Im pretty sure they are almost never in that fat burning zone, either on the track or in the gym. They generally look like they are coping OK with keeping the fat at bay

But muscle weighs more than fat!

No, it really doesnt. A pound of muscle weighs who would have thought it? a pound. The same as a pound of fat. Or a pound of lemon jelly. Or a pound of sweets. A pound is a pound. The muscle just takes up a bit less space (dont click on this visual representation if you are squeamish).If the scales are unfavourable to you, its unlikely to be because the 20-minute run you did yesterday suddenly added 3lb of muscle to your frame. Sorry.

Keeping it off

The trouble with losing weight is that the less you weigh, the fewer calories you need to sustain you, on a day-to-day basis. This is one of the (many) reasons that people might find initial weight loss quite easy but then hit a plateau. Equally, its why many people finish a diet, then immediately find they are putting weight back on: they are eating what they used to be able to consume while maintaining the same weight, but now they actually need less. It doesnt seem fair, does it?

OK, so what exercise should I do?

Which is best for weight loss? The honest answer is probably the one you enjoy and will stick to. Cardio burns more calories at the time you are doing it, but weight training encourages your body to burn more calories through the rest of the day. Most studies that have examined the issue tend to conclude that, if weight loss is the goal, the best approach is to do both.

Finally, for far more authoritative, in-depth analysis of fitness myths and weight loss confusion, I cannot recommend highly enough this book by Alex Hutchinson. In an industry (or industries both the diet and fitness ones in this case) that seem to thrive on fads, misinformation and peddling the latest must have regimes or gadgets, its a clear, science-based look at what really works.

Read more: http://www.theguardian.com/us

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idontwannabeyouanymorw · 6 years

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I feel as if life is in fast forward and it doesn’t care that im falling behind. With everything that’s happened this past year, well this past 8 years, specifically this past year tho I finally feel like Im struggling to stand up. Although I may not be completely up, ive been sitting for so long and all I can do now is acknowledge the fact that im trying to stand up and im taking steps to better myself. Im so much better and stronger than I was almost exactly a year ago. I refuse to ever go back to that person I was a year ago. I refuse to spend another birthday in the hospital. I refuse to let myself ever feel like death was the only option for me. Although its hard for me to see most of the time there is more to live for. Im a dweller and I cant do anything other than try to change my thinking patterns. It comes in waves sometimes I can control my negative disortions but most of the time i have what It seems like little to no control. I catastrophize, that’s all ive ever known and it’s a hard habit it break. Lately ive been feeling very defeated. Ive never don’t this bad in school, its very overwhelming. I bit off way more than I can chew and im suffering all around because of it. I wish I did the two semester option. Im unsure if I want to continue with my education but I know if I don’t use this gi bill I will regret it for the rest of my life. Its just that I feel like I don’t have much left in me anymore. Ive been at war with myself for so long I don’t have much fight left and im barely managing to stay above water as it is.

Lately Ive been realizing that my parents, especially my mom, want me to stay dependent on them. They tell me that I need to grow up when they haven’t taught me to be an adult. I don’t know what they’ve taught me honestly. What type of parent I don’t want to be, what not to do, who not to marry, toxic relationships, addicition. Yes they’ve done a lot for me but I feel like they compensate for their short comings by taking care of me financially. Im trying to save and im trying to start over but my mom is making it impossible and making so that I have to be dependent on them. She wants me to grow up but yet ive come to realize that shes the reason im stagnant financially, emotionally and mentally. I felt so stuck for such a long time until I got in this relationship. Ive learned more about life and how to approach situations in a healthy way in the last month and a half than my parents or my ex ever taught me. Im very happy but I don’t want to let myself become dependent on anyone for anything so I know a part of me will always have some sort of wall up and honestly I don’t know if that’s okay. I’m finding that as an adult im learning and trying to teach myself what a healthy relationship is romantically and familial. Im barely learning boundaries and self worth and self respect and all of that. It’s a hard concept to grasp when you’ve just been introduced to it. I stopped going to therapy because I have 0 time in school but I think that in the time I did go I made a lot of progress.

One thing that ive come to learn is that you really have to put yourself, your emotions, and your boundaries first. For so long I let brandon be the end all be all, wouldn’t live without him sort of thing. Idk how I came to finally realize that I needed to put myself first but im glad I burned him out, poor girl is still with him after he almost choked her to death but that’s not my problem anymore. I never thought id live through that and now I will never go back. I will never let myself get treated that way nor will I ever allow someone to disrespect me in the ways Ive come to think was a normal part of a relationship.

Being with the man im with now is a whole new world. I honestly didn’t think that being treated with respect and compassion and admiration was a thing anymore, and that’s 100% truth. It makes me feel validated about myself when everyone around me always pointed out the negative characteristics about myself. Somehow I feel as if im going to ruin it eventually but that may be just me catastrophizing. For the first few weeks we started talking I was extremely depressed and often would cry in my room and almost broke it off with him because when I get in those mindsets I believe what everyone has told me, even lexi told me im negative and no one wants to be around me (we haven’t hung out since). I truly thought I was doing him more harm than good and that theres no way I can help him grow as a person. It took me a while to get out of those thoughts. I straight up thought he’d run when I told him about my depression, he doesn’t know the severity, I don’t think ill ever express to anyone how severe it is at times except to dina who knows how it is. But im glad that people don’t understand how severe it is and how everything could be going right and you can still feel like dying. Idk I guess I’m just learning how to look at things more positively. He knows a glimpse of how fucked up I am and how damaged I am and still supports me. Idk just shocking to me that youd want to stick around someone who has all these problems. Maybe im being too hard on myself but whatever. Lately ive been focusing on positive emotions rather than ruminating on the negative feelings which has made a difference.

I stopped taking ambien. I crashed my car while I was really fucked up off ambien and well that was a wake up call. Don’t remember anything that happened after the crash. I don’t want to be dependent on drugs to do a simple task like sleep. I think ill be on medication for the rest of my life, I might with this cyst, idk what it is and I skipped my appointment. Partly because I don’t want to know whats wrong, and partly because If I need surgery my mom would make me go in right away and I cant afford to go with school. Hopefully its just a pill to shrink it.

Im stressing about these finals coming up, I haven’t even faced all the stress im supposed to be feeling head on because honestly I don’t care anymore. Theres not much fight left in me. Like I said ive been at war with myself for so long it gets exhausting. I don’t think itll ever get easier you just learn how to cope more efficiently.

Growing up, having the problems that ive had, struggling mentally the way I know, ive honestly never believed I would have a family or get a career or get married. Partly because I was in a toxic relationship and knew he could never offer those things to me and he made me anti everything and partly because I saw how fucked up my parents relationship is and how badd they fucked up me and my sibilings. I never thought id live past 25. For the first time in my life I can see myself getting married and having kids and living a normal life. I have dreams about it all the time. It’s the strangest sensation . maybe because im in a better place, the best place ive ever been, or maybe because someone has actually showed me that im loveable and to believe that im an okay person. Maybe it’s a combination of all of the above. All I know is whatever im doing is working and its not smooth sailings from here, not even close, and the work will never stop that itll all come together one day and work out for the better. Some days I want to quit but idk I just feel like its time I stop giving up and strive to do something better, make someones life better, or even day better.

Haven’t written in like a month and this is the longest post ive ever written. So grammatically incorrect and painful but oh whale.

Will try to write again soooon.

Doing a walk to promote suicide awareness with my sister. It means a lot that she is doing this, shes the one who brought it to my attention actually. Im glad that shes walking with me and not for me.

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apsbicepstraining · 6 years

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What 8 successful ADHDers crave you to know about how they get stuff done.

Whenever I’m working with my family, acquaintances, or peers, they ever ask me how I’m able to get so much better done.

My answer: “I have ADHD.”

That might resonate confusing, but realistically, parties with ADHD don’t always have problems with attention at least , not when we’re is currently working on something that excites us. In reality, ADHD often means that we can hyperfocus on awesome things for hours on end, although sometimes that comes at the expense of all the less-thrilling acts were supposed to be doing.( Why soak the recipes when you can build a rocket ship out of a cardboard casket and a disassembled vacuum cleaner ?)

Most beings with ADHD have to work 10 epoches harder to achieve seemingly basic organizational and era administration abilities skills that other people develop naturally over occasion. While drug can certainly help, it doesn’t do all the work by itself. As a result, we offer more self-conscious attention to life hacks, remembrance maneuvers, productivity shortcuts and other mental managerial arrangements … because we have to .

GIF via Checkoofilm/ YouTube.

Some say that people with ADHD are much more likely to start their own professions, perhaps because were built to tackle imaginative and entrepreneurial challenges.

While other people dont necessary to discover the same ploys that we do, they can benefit from them. In information, Id “re saying that” ADHDers have some of best available advisory opinions and rehearses for get stuff done even if we dont ever listen to that admonition ourselves .

GIF from “Bruce Almighty.”

Here are 21 productivity gratuities from beings with ADHD that even non-ADHDers can learn from TAGEND

1. Habits are concepts you get free of charge. So get into ’em .

Even though Im not a natural creature of habit, I ever start my period with meds, then a shower, then breathes, then breakfast otherwise I know that Im going to forget one of those steps. Habits are virtually self-automation, which represents less brainpower spent on the interesting thing.

2. Always have a backup( or two, or three) and know where to find it .

I deter additional cables, chargers, adapters, medicine, and other things in my luggage at all periods. That way, whether Im going to the grocery store or on vacation, I dont have to worry about maintaining my phone charged.

3. Remember and alertings: love them and use them .

I even have a repetition 2 p.m. notification on my phone that says EAT SOME LUNCH, YOU IDIOT because, erm, I involve the reminder more than Id like to admit.( Also: IFTTT initiations to automate activities and sync between apps and accounts draw life behavior easier .)

GIF from “Despicable Me 2. “

4. Keep a calendar, and planned in the time it takes for “youve got to” do events .

If it takes you additional time to keep a calendar or get into the headspace for a meeting? Factor that in when youre projecting your daytime too.

5. Pay attention to the your day’s ups and downs, and use them to your advantage .

Do you get sleepy claim after lunch? Then perhaps dont dive into that intense assignment at 1 p.m. Are you better when you answer emails in the morning and get active tasks done subsequently? Then do that. Anatomy out what works for you, and follow that planned .

6. Find your tempo and stick with it .

Even if youre not the slow and steady category, a regular blueprint of sprint and remain can still help you reach the finish line. “Sometimes I’ll start counting trounces in my manager to create a lilt, ” says Tv columnist/ director Hadley Klein. “It sounds crazy but for whatever rationale, it helps me think through occasions in a different way.”

GIF via HIKAKIN/ YouTube.

7. Stir a schedule. Check it twice. Then make another list. And another .

Graphic novelist Tyler Page says, I keep one main to-do index on my computer in a Sticky or TextEdit file. Bigger activities get their own rolls where they get broken down into smaller and smaller factors. The rolls also help with prioritizing something that needs to be done right away goes on the daily to-do list.”

GIF from “Monsters University.”

8. Prioritize action over attainment. Doing the thing.

This one comes from Patty Carnevale, head of revenue at Man Repeller. Weighing your progress in a tangible road can assist you seem more successful, which will then give you the drive to keep going.

9. Reward yourself for your accomplishments no matter how small-time .

If you’re someone who needs frequent feedback to get the necessary dopamine lift, then they are able to fake it by lodging a carrot in front of yourself to keep you going. Alysa Auriemma, an English teach, provides an example: I can speak that breathtaking online fanfic IF I get three articles graded!

GIF from “Parks and Recreation.”

10. Turn the boring characters into a game .

I use a fitness watch which checks how many steps I take in a daylight and how many flights of stairs I clamber. Its fun to prepare the numbers go up , says Nalo Hopkinson, an award-winning scribe. She also reports her daily term count on Twitter, so that people are able to cheerlead her along.

11. Don’t dread the boring material. Just get it done. It’s faster that room .

Focus on the satisfaction that youre going to feel once youve finished the assignment, instead of on the time itll go for get onto done which, tells be honest, is perhaps less era than you think.( Of direction, although there are I know this works for me, it’s still easier said than done .)

12. The more you give occasions pile up, the easier it gets to ignore them . Find a route to keep it fresh . Im a addictive inbox zeroer because the longer that little red-faced notification bubble sits there on my phone, the more inclined I am to ignore it. So I differentiate all my emails as “read, ” then use an IFTTT trigger to prompt me later of things that is really require a follow-up or my attention.

GIF from “Community.”

13. If occasions decline your knowledge, visual clues can help .

You are well aware that mantra, “Out of view, out of mind? ” For parties with ADHD, that’s reasonably literal to a fault. So it makes it possible to stick events right in our own faces so that we can’t miss them . When I was in college, I videotapeed a postcard to my accommodation door with the times I needed to leave by to make it to morning castes on time, says Rebecca Eisenberg, Upworthys senior editor.

14. Work with your brain , not against it . Do you tend to lose your keys in the shower? Then make a new residence for them in the bathroom, where youre already inclined to leave them. That way, theyre always there. Don’t fight your impulses. Use their impetu to your advantage . And on that note

15. Embrace your peculiarities and find a way to draw them work for you.

Everyones brain is different. A mint of ADHDers need to figure out on our own what works for us, rather than having person tell us whats the right way to do stuffs. For illustration: If someone else leaves me a directory of instructions or things to do that’s organized by their thought, it exclusively reaches me disappointed and confused. I have to create my own to-do inventories in my own method even if it does take more time.

GIF from “Adventure Time.”

16. Take a end. Move around. Do a bit dance . Movement helps your intelligence get better. As alluring as it is to made the emphasis on discernible actions, its just as important to not do occasions and give yourself a chance to breathe. Sometimes a little interval can give you a lot of new view .

I use a portable movable stand table and a duet of bluetooth headphones so that I can mostly dance in place and write at the same duration. My partner reputes I’m weird, but it works.

17. Know when to call it a era . Its important to abide when youve reached the object of diminishing returns. Don’t be afraid to give your brain a respite, and come back to it fresh the next day . This’ll save you time in the long run too because the more you ability through your exhaustion, the longer it’ll take to recover.

GIF via ilvbunnies/ YouTube.

18. Identity your flaws and strengths, and be transmitted to others .

“My peers are well aware that in exchange for abiding all the things I do that reach me little dependable, they get a guy who are in a position think outside the box, that can create on the operate, that can wear numerous hats at once, ” says Upworthy’s fearless editor-at-large, Adam Mordecai.

“They also know that if they want something from me, I’m far likelier to get it done if they ping me immediately following chat rather than on email. Give your peeps know how to get the most out of you.”

19. Retain your seeing on the reward, but f orgive yourself and others . Everyones fighting their own uphill battles, and you’re not going to get anything done if you’re too busy hitting yourself up .( Youre not going to help anybody else be more productive if you externalize it and pick on them either .)

GIF from the SAG Awards.

20. Set your goals, but remain flexible.

Maybe you didnt get as much done today as you had hoped, but thats OK. Regroup, “re coming” with a new programme, and try to figure out what went wrong so you can do it better next time. Which fetches me to the last, and perhaps most important, lesson TAGEND

21. Try again. Fail again. Fail better.

This is actually a quote from Samuel Beckett, but it also makes for the purposes of an good productivity mantra. The bad parts and failures are inescapable, and youll never overcome them all. But thats OK. Accept it, learn from it, and keep going anyway.

But you do have a mentality. So use it. GIF from “The Wizard of Oz.”

ADHDers understand one thing better than most people: Success is not a stationary target.

There’s no “one weird trick” that will actually bring you any closer to success.

Instead, the best we can hope for is to embrace ourselves for all our strengths and weaknesses, and continue feeling things to work toward. Perhaps that’s a new business seek, 15 simultaneous hobbies, or plainly recollecting to put your underwear on before your pants.

If that last part is a measurable clue, then for me, today was an extraordinary success.

The post What 8 successful ADHDers crave you to know about how they get stuff done. appeared first on apsbicepstraining.com.

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