#and talking abt your problems to a talk show

[queenie-blackthorn]

sometimes i feel like i hate everyone

#if i ever say “i hate you” dont take it personally #everyone does stupid shit sometimes n thats fine but its happening sm and im sick of it n i need to speak up #chances are if u see this ur not part of the problem bc ur actually reading the shit i post #the fact that barely anyone realized that i relapsed into sh yesterday is crazy #im not doing this for attention its a fucking cry for help and most of yall are ignoring me #you ignore me when im fine and you ignore me when i need you #what am i supposed to do ffs #do i have to show you my bleeding thighs for you to ask how i am? #do you have to wait until i scream and cry and hurt myself for you to care abt me? #do i not matter unless im hurting? or do i not matter even when i am hurting? #do i have to fucking die for any of yall to realize theres something mentally wrong w me? #fuck you all youre just as bad as my parents #except for the four people who talked me out of spiralling last night #two of which were people i barely/dont know #so yeah maybe try harder n actually ask ur friends how they are #dont push them to the point where they need to be comforted by strangers

[k1rishiki]

oh yeah. the reason why i decided to reread tbhk (and thus it was able to hit me like a truck this time around) was actually not bc of mitsukou going canon but actually bc i maybe accidentally started a tbhk book club w my kids at work and wanted to check the contents of it justttt in case before i put the books in their hands

#tl;dr i have this one 4th grade boy who's a total weeb and knows that i'm the only one in this town who's more into japanese media than him #so he pesters me abt it every time he sees me. and the thing abt this kid is that he gets bored easily and if he does he turns into a #complete menace. now a couple weeks ago. he shows up at the program w one piece volume one and spends the entire time he's there peacefully #reading and not causing any problems on purpose. my coworker owen (the one who climbed onto the roof) and i were shocked and in awe of how #peaceful he was being and came to the conclusion that he NEEDS to have a manga volume in his hands at all times. few minutes later. #he finishes reading and isn't bored yet so he decides to go talk to me abt manga. specifically he starts pestering me abt what shonen i've #read despite the fact that i am a shoujo reader and told him that. but he knows i've read kuroshitsuji bc he previously asked me abt what #the worst anime i've ever watched is and i will never not take an excuse to drag the adaptation. and he figures that if i've read kuro i've #probably read more. and so i mention tbhk and he asks more abt it bc of the name involving toilets and him being a 4th grade boy so i give #brief overview and he wants to read it. and i come up with a scheme to make him peaceful AND to give him something to talk to me abt which #isn't 'i know you've read more shonen manga' 'let me gacha on your phone' or 'i saw an ad for rent a gf. thought it was lame. and now want #you to tell me how it sucks bc i assume you know everything abt every animanga ever' (<does unfortunately know too much abt rent a gf bc i' #a bit of a nosy bastard and watched the mother's basement video). so i offered to bring it in bc i own physicals of the whole series and of #as previously mentioned. gave it a quick reread in advance just in case. and got hit by it. hard. i love you tbhk almost as much as i love #when ppl get into things through me. honestly i think getting to live vicariously through him might be one of the main reasons it got me #this time around and not as much the first time (still loved it the first time though). flash forward a little while. one of the 3rd grade #girls is like. really into reading. and also macabre things. like ghosts. and she has two books from the school library. and has had the #same two books from the school library for over a week. she reads quickly and finished them both in under a day and is now bored out of her #mind rereading them. she asks to read the books i've been letting the other kid read. now there are two of them #romeo.txt

[opens-up-4-nobody]

...

#i spend so mad god damn time bitching on this website. its bc i dont talk to ppl. whens the last time i had a non functional conversation? #uuuuhhh last weekend or maybe the weekend before that? so like i gotta complain somewhere. so if i stop complaining u can assume i made #friends lmao. ugh. its just. im worried. im worried abt how this semester is gonna go. how this phd program is gonna go #bc i spent the last 2 years destroying myself. realized ive gotta stop doing that. haven't figured out how to stop and now im gonna triple #the amount of pressure im under while trying to do things in a more healthy way. its just like. it objectively doesnt seem like a formula #for good things to happen. im more worried for how catastrophic its gonna b on my brain than i am abt the things i think most ppl would b #concerned abt. like im not worried abt planning and executing a project or teaching beyond fear of the unknown #its like. ive done these things before. theyre difficult but u make due and tackle the problems. but when it comes to: how to maintain a #healthy school/life balance? i dont even kno where to start with that. i just dont bc when u have a learning disability things just take #more time but like how much time is too much? where does it end? i dont kno how to manage it and i dont wanna hate my project by the end #of this. i want to b excited and not paralyzed bc im afraid i cant change my behavior and its gonna kill me #and im worried bc im meeting with my advisor for the 1st time since march before i agreed to join thr lab and have i prepared for this #project which is almost complete unrelated to what i did in my last lab? no bc ive been managing data and im still not done managing data #bc i cant focus bc i collected that data in a way that was actively self destructive. and i mean i kno itll b fine. thr guy seems nice i #just hate that im showing up devoid of enthusiasm bc its all been drowned out by the fear. and thats also gonna make teaching a problem #bc its hard to b excited abt things when there's a hole in your chest and ur desperate for someone to tell u how to fix it. but idk helping #ppl does usually make me feel better so maybe itll b a good thing. forgot how much i feel like im dying when i sit in meetings and #classroom tho lol. god its been 2yrs since i was a student. classes feel like such bullshit now. and yet if i dont get all As i might die #my students better b good. i have the 1st lab section bc thr lead ta couldnt do that time. so im the trial lab and i start fucking Monday #who tf does labs the 1st week of class? ugh. also its an intro bio so like 2/3 of thr class r freshman. lil bby 18yos and some r non bio #majors. and ive been warned that sometimes there r problems with ppl who don't believe in evolution and cause problems. pls let my classes #b good. im not that worried. its just gonna b annoying as fuck. im not good at being authoritative #ugh. i should b reading papers so i dont look like too much of an idiot tomorrow. itll b fine im just an anxious freak. a lil over a week #until i can try to find a therapist. probably seek medication bc i dont kno how else to stop this bullshit. annoying. i grew up with a dad #who gets anxious abt the idea of taking too much medication when he tskes a single ibuprofen. in this household we feel pain and then we #die miserable. this is all his fault. we have the same brain.im just a lil more irradidic than him #its so funny i say that bc im like the least irradic person ever. i do the same things every god damn day. im just irradic in terms of #sometimes i feel like my brain is on fire and im a cry bby lol #whatever. enough bitching. ive got papers to read. or maybe ill just go to bed and read them tomorrow 🙄 #unrelated

[zoekrystall]

Saw certain tweets and here once again a reminder which a twt mutual luckily wrote shorter than I could (plus public so I can rb bc no way I do that myself on that site)

Also

And if you want smth I wrote myself which is longer and not just abt that here you go

#a wild lux appears #I think they're one mutual who is fine w being screenshotted ik some don't want that #I wrote that bsky thing while waiting for food. Reg the fellow person I talk abt don't bash ppl that already spoke up and stop for a bit #To rb more later. Or ppl that still go to work bc they can't afford not to bc the thing by these actions is community isn't there as net #Or like anyone that shows they care and didn't do anything harmful and just take recharge time or so #Educate willing(!) ppl nicely and don't bash them or send a internet mob to them etc #The ones posting they still go to/buy boycott stuff yeah they're awful but what does bashing them bring at the end of the day #Don't support those ppl yeah but them posting that shows how much they care for it. They prob just want cloud which you give them. #Pressure ppl in power in a way they can't ignore focus on that not no name individuals #If ppl you know talk in private and if they don't want to change literally just cut them out of your life if possible #Online just block. Don't argue w people that just want to stir smth up etc etc #Also I don't think it's too productive to be mad when a standard user anywhere doesn't share stuff. Like yeah give them info abt that but #some either just do smth offline (in that case maybe tell them in this case just sharing online is also helpful) or are mentally too done #and focus all energy to survive (which is intended by the ppl in power. make ppl so done they only have energy to survive themselves so they #don't have energy to speak up abt problems in the world). Bashing famous ppl is completely different bc backlash actually brings smth there. #More ppl could do more if strike organizations would include community care so more actually could not go to work/shopping #Also reg protests so they should know do you know how many don't watch news anymore (I don't watch tv since many years) #I'm sure some also just can't esp younger ppl if they're parents monitor their socials and are zionists #Ofc speak up. I'm just here to say there are explanations. If they read things and still don't care unfollow/block/mute/idc or if you know #Them talk and explain how if is important they speak up #This has been going on for a good while now idk how many still don't know I am mostly pointing that out for new or not as much shared things #Tho I'm sure many don't know bc the standard response is the gov knows what he does and they do propaganda #They think surely the gov takes care of that. If they shut down convos reg that then that is dangerous denialism and living in escapism n #All. Not if the ppl who follow this need a break w fiction or so. I am sure the ppl you try to reach w bashing already muted/blocked all #accs and words associated w that #Anyways I gotta shower now. Disclaimer my personal opinion be an asshole and it's block on sight yada yada. #I just woke up I'm hungry I need to shower but that is also when I decide to share my pieces so

[seal-berry]

listening to game grumps remixes and realizing it been 10 years since i was a sad 16 year old incredibly fucked up deeply closeted suicidal kid stuck at my parents house and being taken back to that particular headspace is insane. i feel like i havent changed much its more like ive just slowly stripped away all the religious trauma and poorly managed anxiety but its insane that 16 year old me was like. haha. everything is absolutely awful and i want to die but if i get my 20-40 minutes of internet funnyman time daily i will be ok. it was definitely just refreshing and nice to hear from adults out there living and not constantly talking about Our Lord Jesus Christ and why Everything you do is Wrong because that was basically the whole bubble i was stuck in. (holy shit i barely think about it now but before i truly had enough self confidence to deconvert it literally felt like i was living an awful double life between irl and online, which i think is probably a common sentiment but god i forgot what its like to be in that constant self-monitoring place.) i think a lot of it was just wishing i had anything deeper than surface level friendships at the time and ALSO a deeply entwined gender envy for both arin and dan getting to be career silly guys. truly the funnyman was in me all along i simply had to nurture his feral puppyboy spirit and also build the habit of beating the shit out of neurotic thoughts. which all does still go out the window if i have to do socialization in person but hey ill take being able to be an actual person in any capacity or medium ngl being locked up in your own head and having literally nobody take any interest in your real opinions or personality if it falls outside a very specific kind of wanted behavior is a slow and painful internal death. the way we raise kids in this country is deeply fucked ngl anyways thanks game grumps remixes for perfectly dropping me back into 2012 at like midnight on the computer in the living room constantly watching over my shoulder so nobody would see me watch a guy say fuck and then cut off my internet access and my ability to make art and all my social ties

#game grumps #autism #idgaf abt getting personal on here so ill mention #my mom got suuuper pissed when i tried to talk to her abt how this fucked me up #and shes been receptive to mending past hurts so i was hopeful but she was like i could not have known it would be devastating for you #and its like uhmmm you definitely couldve if you had fostered any open communication between us #or showed any interest in me aside from checking in just enough for me to show her i was ok enough for her to feel ok #to be fair our whole family was drowning i think she literally didnt have the capacity to deal with any of my problems #pray away the anxiety kid i know ur dads on wellbutrin and has had lifelong anxiety but i bet youre neurotypical #anyways dont have kids if youre gonna raise them in church #the web is fucked up but its also absolutely a spiders thread out of hell and can expose you to people who dont hate themselves wowie!!

[luminescentturtle]

actually still pissed abt ahsoka. my children what have they done to you.

#this post brought to you by THAT’S NOT MY CHILD #sabine is NOT a fucking jedi #AHSOKA IS NOT A GODDAMN JEDI DAVE FILONI DID YOU WATCH YOUR OWN FUCKING SHOW #HERA WOULD NEVER EVER JUST LEAVE THE EZRA MISSION LIKE THAT. AUTHORITY BE DAMNED SHE WAS LITERALLY A MAIN CHARACTER IN A SHOW CALLED REBELS #THRAWN IS NOT AN IDIOT AND AHSOKA IS NOT. A DAMN. JEDI #so angry forever and ever they should’ve just made a rebels 2 #should’ve animated it. #when i wanted to see ezra again I DIDN’T MEAN LIKE THIS #star wars negativity #ahsoka negativity #turtle talks #guys i’m so mad abt this show and i don’t know why it was doomed from the start #but… how could you sideline chopper like that #let’s talk abt the REAL problem here. that treatment of chopper was just irredeemable

[4giorno]

literally yohan having a mental crying screaming pissing fit bc he wishes it was gaon walking arm in arm with him

#HES SO ANNOYED AND PISSED OFF THE WHOLE TIME hjfjdjdjdkdkdd #theres no need to worry he will get to have his sugar d*ddy fantasy very soon 💖 #i just finished ep 2 and omg. despite all its problems. this show is so important to me #i missed this cringe old man and his bs <333333 #underrated moment aka no ones ever talked abt it that i just noticed was that during the explosion gaon put his hand #on the back of yohans head/neck #he was like hold up before i pass out let me tenderly cradle the back of your head real quick #anyway next is ep 3 aka our beloved daughter elijah is here 🥺🥺🥺💖

[tiredstressedemotionalmess]

earlier today my administrator pulled me out of class to talk abt how i can "improve my attendance" and i had to tell her. for the THIRD FUCKING TIME NOW that there is NOTHING ELSE I CAN DO TO BE IN SCHOOL MORE OFTEN!!! i already go in AS MUCH AS I FUCKING CAN. i am in there AT LEAST twice a week usually with some sort of headache and i am only missing the worst of the worst days where i am PHYSICALLY UNABLE TO GET OUT OF BED

#ugh watch me show up to school next time i wake up with a migraine #she wants me in school so bad? fine. #she can be the one to deal with it when i puke in the middle of class or collapse in the hallway or something idc anymore #sorry for the rant but like. three fucking times we have had this conversation 😭 #and she keeps saying the same thing 'what can i do to help you succeed' 'what can we do to prevent this' #FOR ONE THING YOU CAN STOP MAKING ME FEEL GUILTY ABOUT SOMETHING I ALREADY FEEL BAD ABT #AND WTF DOES SHE MEAN 'WE'??? WHAT'S SHE GONNA DO??? PAY FOR MY FUCKING NEUROLOGIST APPOINTMENTS? BE MY FUCKING GUEST LADY #the best part is two of the times weve had this conversation she has pulled me OUT OF CLASS TO DO SO #LIKE HELLO???? WHY ARE YOU PULLING ME FROM CLASS TO TELL ME I CANT MISS ANYMORE CLASS?? #I HAVE STUDY HALLS JUST FIND ME THEN?????? OR EMAIL ME?????? OR MAYBE DONT FUCKING TALK TO ME ABT IT AT ALL BC THIS IS NOT. YOUR. PROBLEM. #dear god. its been hours and i am STILL so fucking annoyed #someone remind me to delete this later lmao

[samuraisharkie]

So glad to unfollow and block someone who subscribes to such trash takes/opinions/ideologies. So annoying

ur on anon so like. idk who you are not have any reason to care. you don’t need to tell me you’re leaving you know, btw, you don’t have to announce it. it’s not hurting my feelings and it’s a waste of your time. I’m not even clear on why you were following me in the first place if you don’t agree with anything I post lol. glad I’m living in ur brain rent free though. I hope I can upgrade from annoying to an incessant pest

#this sounds like a you problem. everyone point and laugh at anon #they won’t see this unless they were bluffing abt blocking but it’s a great example of how pointless these ‘I’m unfollowing you’ anons are #also extremely funny I got this after reblogging Phineas and Ferb shit and talking about the one piece shit going on. #like I’m sorry this is so fundementally opposed to your lifestyle #I’ll try to avoid Disney tv shows and talking about show advertising in the future 🫡 #ngl I feel kind of honored to get one of these. does this mean I’m winning social media

[poobit]

i aggree with the post thats like "you cant revolve your whole life around kid´s shows you have to broaden your interests" but boy some of the takes ... some of the takes in the tags are ... woof ...like you ... shouldnt say that...

#if your takeaway from experiencing bad friendships due to ppl having abysmal takes abt kid shows is like #*you are alienating people around you because you wanna talk abt kids shows 24/7* ... oh boy youre ... taking the wrong message here... #theres literally nothing wrong with having a deep interest in kids shows and how they relate to you or the themes or whatever #that isnt the problem here the problem here is what you do with your own attitude and how you treat people BASED ON IT #and that you have to be able to hold a mature conversation with your fellow adults without basing your entire moral system on what #a cartoon does or doesnt do

[arataka-reigen]

Whenever some new media that should not be getting attention comes out i simply don't blog about it...

#one big problem i see with things like the velma show is how many people hate watch it just to talk about it #or dont even watch it but still talk abt it and give it clout #the best way to kill a media is to be silent about it and not put your money or attention on it #i dont even want to tag the thing that inspired me to make this post. apparently it is what everyone is talking about in this site. #and i do not want to give it any more attention #gi talks

[nomaishuttle]

girl im so sick of sarahs shit i font get what her fucking deal is

#she was like can i show you something ^_^didnt wait for an answer came over and started showing me some video that was like Dont talk abt #your problems live happy and its like girl i wouldnt ever be talking to you in the first places

[thelastharbinger]

TW// MENTIONS OF SEXUAL ASSAULT

How unsurprising that fans who defended their favorite diluted-porn boy's love series for rewarding a character who commits SA also did not bat an eye when a fan-favorite actor from said show is discovered to have been a real life misogynist and fucking r*pe apologist.

Just because you think he has a cute and innocent face, doesn't change the fact that Build, in his twenties, was slutshaming women for the way they dressed and actively contributed to r*pe culture by criticizing women who spoke out against SA basically saying, "What do women who dress like that expect to happen?" and outright says to a male victim of SA (my own rephrasing here but the message is the same) "Why don't you turn your experience into a positive? You might like it." The Fuck???

He may have very well changed (we can never be sure because we don't know these people personally), but that doesn't automatically earn him people's trust. Build fans right now are adamantly screaming, "Forgiveness! He was only 20-21 at the time, how could he know better?! Everyone make mistakes or else we're not human!"

No, a mistake is trying to draw a circle but the two ends don't meet. Replying to a victim of SA while also using homophobic language is, at that point, a bit of a fucking character trait don't you think? That cannot easily be undone.

Anyways, these are the translations of his old social media posts, along with the apology he just recently posted.

#SA👏Apologists👏don't 👏need👏your👏protection👏SA👏victims👏do👏 #like i can't imagine him being a safe space for women victims or queer identified individuals at that time #if you need to be taught that sa is wrong no matter the circumstances #then you are a symptom of various problems come together. namely you view sex as a right owed to you & dont care about bodily autonomy #anyways FUCK build #also this man is in one of the most successful programs in the world rn and they're all about to go on a world tour #he will continue to reap successes so this one angry post is not going to ruin his career before his kiss ass fans start #build will ultimately be fine as all men like this are but i remain confused as to how the vegaspete stans are most worried abt him rn #again but with feeling: FUCK BUILD AND THIS FUCKING SHOW #KP had problems since the get-go. i continue to watch this show trend bcos the fangirlies like to see grown men dry hump & grab ass #kinnporsche #biblebuild #vegaspete #fuuuuuuuuck this show #mileapo #tw r*pe #the first and last time ill talk about this show here

[eurydicees]

ok y'all i'm gonna be traveling a lot today (2 flights w/ a gross layover), so my goal is to try n get some writing done, but i would love to also talk to y'all (otherwise i'm gonna be sitting alone and in silence in an airport / on a plane for the entire day and that might drive me insane). pls talk to me abt anything at all (examples in the tags lol). ily friends <3

#dont rb #genuinely gonna be so bored and would LOVE to talk to ppl #tell me abt your day or your week or the upcoming while !! #infodump to me abt a special interest or hyperfixation u have rn ! i am SO willing to listen to anything at all #explain ur current creative projects or things you want to do in the future! what AUs live rent free in ur mind? #give me a fic rec or a music rec or a book rec or a show/movie rec or anything #probably gonna end up reading a lot of fics tbh so i would Welcome any recs #rant to me abt a problem or just rant about all the best characteristics of a blorbo from ur show #tell me a secret! ask for a compliment and i shall provide! self promo ur best shit ! #also rbed an ask game last night that was fun so feel free to send in numbers from that one !! #idk man i jsut don't want to be lonely all day while stressed and traveling

[koalas-koalas-everywhere]

“The Donna” is like the writers reached into my brain with their dirty little fingers and pulled out everything I hate about Donna’s character and made it into a plot point.

#Suits TV #Donna Paulsen #The Donna #season 6 #Teeth Nose Teeth #let us spend 2 of the 3 minutes of screen time Donna's allotted to talk abt how awesome she is without showing it #the remaining minute will be about her providing a sounding board to solve someone else's problems #or to use her hand-wavy telepathy to provide the audience with insight into the minds of men too closed up to talk about it themselves #because god knows she hasn't had a plot line of her own since freaking Huntley #now to be clear she was GREAT when she started out #she used to earn the shitload of praise she gets on the regular #the last time she did that was getting the Plaza for Rachel and Mike's wedding #the bit where she blackmailed/impressed Stu was also pretty great but in a way it was also telling us that she's awesome instead of showing #and now she's getting a freaking Alexa made after her because she's so awesome even someone who never gets out of his floor #and we've never seen interact with her can tell and thinks having a Donna-Jarvis would be a market success???? please #thank you for reminding me of all her great qualities! the fact that you needed to put that into dialogue definitely speaks well of your wri #writing and confidence in it!