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#and sometimes i feel like its not my place to speak on this
rumisgf · 2 days
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“MY GIRL” SATORU GOJO X BLACK!READER
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summary: gojo is known for having talking stages with lots of people, which leads you to doubt that you’re not just another talking stage. but, after talking for a while, he finally wants you to be his. he’s willing to do whatever it is to prove you’re his and show you how he really feels.
includes: implied “situationship”, fem terms and pronouns used, player!gojo, lover girl!reader, confession, eventual smut, fluff, lots of praise, oral f! receiving, penetration, possessiveness, corruption kink if you squint
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it’s no secret that saturo gets around. he’s had his fair share of entanglements, flings, and hookups. but, you were different.
when he had a crush on you, he found himself more nervous than usual. his brain couldn’t function properly- even worse than its natural state of aloofness. he’d blabber about you to everyone. namami, geto, kiyotaka, shoko, hell even his own student itadori— he’d talk about you to megumi nonstop for gods sake, and i promise you that boy was tired of hearing about you.
then, he finally got you. he finally got the courage to make advances on you. to his surprise, they were reciprocated. you two would flirt, stay in each other’s dorms, go on “links”, you both even get to the point of falling asleep on the phone and good morning texts.
and he actually treated you very well. he was sweet, showered you with compliments, and he didn’t even hide you from others. but, a part of you still had doubt. you were aware of his past and didn’t wanna look dumb. your friends would make little jokes about you being “delulu” and always pointing out how whipped you were, so you’d be more than embarrassed if he ended up playing with your feelings.
these were all the thoughts going through you head before you knocked on the man’s apartment door, coming to hang with him after he texted you and asked you to come chill with him.
you always said yes, of course. but then again, you always said yes. it’s almost pathetic how weak you are for him.
“hey gorgeous~” the door opens almost instantly and you’re greeted by a blue eyes with a bright smile. his hair is down and he’s in a tank top, exposing his surprisingly muscular arms. his sleeper build is one of the things that has you so whipped. you smile back at him and hug him, his arms going to squeeze your waist. after a few seconds you release yourself from his hold and make your way to his bed as if his place is practically yours.
he finds his way next to you and watches as you immediately go to scroll on your phone. however, he seems…off. usually, he’d be more touchy. or, he’d also be on his phone or be on the game. he’s just watching you this time, as if he’s contemplating something. you finally look at him, cocking your eyebrow.
“may i help you, sir?”
he laughs, almost as if he was embarrassed (which he kinda was— he didn’t notice he was staring). “nothing, just thinkin’.” you softly laugh in return, going back to your phone. “about what?” you mindlessly asks. he takes a second to pause, then you hear him take a deep breath.
“i want you to be my girlfriend.”
now, it’s your turn to pause. you’re stuck in place as your brain tries to process what he just said. gojo, “mr. bitches”, satoru just asked to cuff you. you have to be dreaming.
“what?” is all you can say. he sits up, and looks directly at you. “y/n, i wanna make you mine.” you struggle to make eye contact with him, at a loss for words. “i know we’ve been talking for some months and i just…i really really like you— a lot. i can’t stop thinking about you and i can’t see myself with anybody but you. i want you- fuck it, i need you in my life so bad. you’re everything i look for.”
your face heats up as he’s sitting there, confessing his feelings for you. you finally get the courage to speak. “i really like you too, satoru. and honestly, i been waiting for you to ask this for so long. i know it seems stupid, but i just… i don’t wanna see you with anybody else. and sometimes i just-” you cut yourself off, not wanting to ruin the moment. his face softens and he grabs your hands. “what? you can tell me anything, gorgeous, i swear.”
“…do you really mean this? i don’t wanna just be…i don’t how to say this… another one.” you finally let it out your chest, and he looks down at your hands. then, he lifts you up and has you straddling him on his lap as he makes direct eye contact with you. “baby, i swear there is nobody else i could want but you. i don’t care about those other hoes or anybody else, they got nothing on you..”
his eyes fall to your lips, and he takes another breath. “i love you, y/n, and i just wanna be able to call you my girl.” your heart is beating rapidly by now, and you wrap your arms around his neck. “i love you too, i’m yours.”
you both lean in and close the space between you two. your lips collide with his, slowly moving in rhythm with each other. his hands squeeze your thighs, then he holds your waist and begins to take control. he flips you over, and his lips quickly find their way to your neck. you let out a small whine as he sucks on the skin, eagerly making his mark on you. he kisses and bites all over “mine…all mine…” he breathes into your neck.
instinctively, your legs spread and he subconsciously grinds against you. this earns a moan escaping your lips, and he pulls away. “you want to?” he asks. you frantically nod, but this time he really wants to keep things romantic. you’re his girlfriend now, he wants to prioritize making you feel loved over wanting to get off. “you sure? i wanna hear you say it, love.” you look at him with needy eyes, ones that cause an erection to start to grow in his pants. “please.”
“say no more, baby.” he dives back into your lips, hands tugging at your bottoms. he pulls them down and plays with the hem of your underwear, still keeping a steady rhythm as he kisses you.
your hand goes to unzip his pants. as you try to pull them down, he stops you. usually, you’re first to go down on him, but he wants this time to be different. “let me take care of you, i got it.” he says with a sweet, loving smile on his face as he pulls away. then he slides his finger through your clothed slit, already feeling how wet you are. you hum as he teases you, getting you all worked up for him. his thumb slowly finds your clit. “that’s it baby, relax…” he rubs you through your underwear and you moan again, squirming under his touch. another reason you’re so whipped for him: he always knows how to make you feel good.
“toru..please…” you whine, looking down at his hands. “well can you look at me first, baby?” he teases, and you can hear the smirk on his face before you even look up at him. then, he slides his hand in your underwear and toys with your clit, sticky with your arousal. “mhm…good girl~” he cooes as you moan out for him. your eyes threaten to close as pleasure swirls all through your stomach, still aching for more. just as that feeling arises, he dips his ring finger into your pulsing hole and your eyes roll back.
satoru watches your every move as you writhe under him, adding another finger as your slicks begins to spill out and making you squirm even more. then, he pulls them out and brings them to his mouth. he licks them clean, watching in satisfaction as you look to him for more. without a word, he leans down to your soaking heat. all while keeping eye contact, he kisses your clit.
you gasp, and he takes no time sucking on the sensitive bud. “f-fuck~” you moan, gripping onto his hair with your hand. he hums as your freshly manicured nails dig into his scalp while he works you with his mouth. you sing out for him as he laps your pussy with his tongue, running it through your folds and dipping into your hole. “baby, i’m c-close…” you cry. he only moves his tongue faster, drawing harsh circles on your clit. finally, you let you on his tongue with a long, strung out moan. your legs shake and your grips tightens on your hair as you cum, him slowly sucking on your clit through your orgasm.
he lifts off with a pop! then kicks off his pants and boxers, his fully erect dick springing out as he climbs on top of you. he strokes himself, kissing your lips and giving you a taste of your own arousal. “you ready, princess?” he breathes out, and you hum in response, lifting up your legs.
he lines himself up with your entrance, and easily slides in due to your previous orgasm. you both moan in sync, him burying his face in your neck. he pumps into you at a slow pace, each thrust deeper than the one before. he finally bottoms out and your eyes roll back in ecstasy as you moan out in pure bliss.
“fuck baby, you tight as fuck…” he rasps as your walls clench him as he moves in and out of you. he kisses you, then looks into your eyes as he makes love to you. “my pretty baby, always so good for me.” his thrusts slowly begin to quicken and your mouth falls open. “yeah, you like that?”
you hum in response, turning your head and burying it into the pillow as your hand grips his arm. “fuck s- mmm- s’ good…” he smirks as he rolls his hips, fucking into you even deeper and reaching for the spot that’ll have you melting. you whine as he fucks you, sending pleasure all through your warmth to your legs and stomach. “i know baby, ah shit- you love this dick don’t you?” he says as he leans down to your ear. “mhm~” you respond instantly, slick dripping out of your cunt. “mhm…so fucking wet for me.”
“yeah.. who’s pussy is this? huh?” your walls clench from the question and you’re barely able to answer” “y- fuck! yours…it’s all yours~”
“yeah this my pussy, all mine.” his words send chills down your spine, putting you in a trance as your orgasm builds up in your stomach. then, he pulls out, immediately picking you up and placing you on his lap. he finds your entrance, and positions you above his dick. you slowly slide down all the way on him.
“fuuuuck, just like that…” he moans, feeling your soaked walls tightening around him again. you eagerly bounce on his dick, moaning loudly from how you can feel every inch of him. he then places his hands on your ass, setting a pace for you and guiding you. “cmon ride me baby, just like that..such a good girl for me, yeah?” you can only moan in response, drowning in pleasure as a familiar knot builds up inside you. “‘m gonna cum…” you cry out.
he snaps his hips up inside you, causing you to nearly scream as he repeatedly slams his dick info your g-spot. you moan out his name and a smile is plastered across this face. “go ahead, cum for me baby. cum all over this dick.” and you do just that, creaming all on him as you bury your head into his neck, moaning his name and several curses.
he turns you back over, still buried inside you as he begins plunging into you. his hand presses one of your legs against your chest as you cry and moan from the overstimulation. “fuck baby i love you…love you so much~” he moans as he chases his own high. finally, he lets out a loud moan as he pulls out, cumming all over your stomach.
you both catch your breath, and he manages to lift himself off you. after finding a towel and cleaning himself off, he crashes onto his bed and pulls you on top of him.
“i’m yours.” he says, sweetly kisses your forehead. he squeezes you tight as if you were gonna fly out of him arms, and you smile into his chest. “i love you, baby.”
“i love you too, toru.” and just like that, you were finally his.
@ rumisgf
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hiaon · 1 day
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hello mister!
would you ever be up to writing a story Mulan-like style, in which a country is at war and young adults who are alphas go to fight, and for some reason omega!male!reader decides to pass as an alpha (or even a beta who volunteered instead of getting drafted) and goes to war. Perhaps even before a battle, maybe when the troops are still training, his commander (an alpha dilf who is like 35 while reader is like 20) finds out that the reader is an omega while he’s in heat and he just goes on to breed the reader, maybe even get his poor subordinate knocked up?
Dubcon if you want, but if you’re not comfortable with it, do whatever you want!!
Sorry for this :p and thanks for reading!
'Helping'
Commander x Male! Bottom! Reader
Also this was a very great idea. I had to write it as fast as possible.. But I took forever so 🤡🤡
Disclaimer: Dubcon, fingering, Corruption kink.
Should I write more in 1st person POV? It's been a while... I should have made this 1st person POV.. Nvm.. Next suggestion or my own story. I'll make it 1st person POV.
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It was hard enough to be accepted to go out to war. But somehow your secondary gender made it worst, you we're in heat and don't know what to do.
Secondary genders are the once that makes sure either your going to be in a comfortable position or you suffer. Beta makes up 60% of the world. Alphas are the most respected secondary gender, either a man or a woman, you are still guaranteed to have a happy life.
While.. Omegas are that everybody finds charming when the omega is a women. But not a man, imagine when a man giving birth.. It's just ruin the reputation and image of a man. So when they figure out when a boy is an omega.. They usually just forcefully take them. But your a lucky one.
Your father had this magical pill that you still don't know where the origins of, make you take them everyday so you'll seem more like an beta.
So some people seemed confused that you look so feminine. But they eventually brushed it off.
Thanks to the pills that your father gave to you every day your scent just seems like any other beta. Until, your father was being forced to serve the kingdom and fight for war. You wasn't an option because betas are only 21 and above only, you we're only 20 at that time, and most importantly the standard recruitment is that you have to be an alpha. Your father was an alpha.
Your father had 2 days until he goes to the troops camp. But you we're stubborn, you wanted your father to have happy days, and have peace. So you took your father's place. Also took all the pills that you had which was 3 months worth of the pills, but also you knew it wasn't going to last long.
But you kept your Identity safe. But they we're confused on why you had such an feminine body. It eventually toned down with that.
But you eventually befriend 3 humble looking fellows and, you manage to get close with the commander not because of great communication.. Its because on how much you get hurt when practicing.. Which was a lot of times.
You noticed that you he was in the infirmary tent a lot. You sometimes start small-talks, he speaks so little so you eventually just stopped.
You and your teammates we're preparing to attack tomorrow, so you guys we're prepping the swords, armor, shield and ect... Meanwhile you we're done with preparing with the things needed, you decided to take a bath since you always talk the bath last. It's just more comfortable that way.
While you we're bathing you felt something weird. In your stomach area. It started to burn you never experienced this your whole life, is it because you stopped taking the pills? More likely ran out of it.
You never forgot to take the pills, because your father say so, so this what happens when you skip..?
You started to feel cold on how hot you we're getting, the new sensations makes you less aware that somebody was entering the water with you.
"[Y/N]" that voice startled you.
"O-oh!." You really needed something. You just didn't know why.
"[Y/N] I have been wanting to ask you something for quite some time." Your Comander said after briefly saying— "Are you truly a beta?"
The commander looked like he wants answers.
You couldn't contain it anymore and to had no shame in asking it was too cold for and hot at the same time—
"Command.. Commander.. Can you please hu.. hug me.!" The commander was stunned for a moment, and hugged him all of the sudden.
"I know now, I know what you are." The commander picked you up in a bride style and put on a towel on to your body and coving you face along with it.. Yes, he was walking naked towards his tent. No one was allowed in there. But it seems like you was going to be in that tent for a while.
You just feel that some people saw but the commander did not give two shits about them.
He just kept on walking to the tent, as if he wasn't at all naked at all..
He placed you into— you assumed his bed.
"Do you even know how to take care of your heat?" The Commander asked you. But to be honest, you don't know even what a heat is.
"Uhm." As you we're trying to answer, the commander was still standing up while getting in between your legs.
"You don't have to answer that, besides, I like it that way." The commander said while spreading his way to you hole, and your slick made it less painful. So that's why it's there.
"W-what are you doing Ack!" The commander's fingers keeps on going deeper than it should. When he hit the spot you made a lot of noise, so he kept hitting it.
"Ahh.! Commande-er.! Please stop!" You said that but you really didn't want him to stop. This was the thing you didn't know you needed the most.
"Mhm.." The commander took out his two fingers and licked it. It was kind of embarrassing for him to do that, and you don't even know the reason.
"Try telling me if it hurt or not okay?" The commander told you as he aligned his member to your hole.
"Wha-" You stopped mid sentence when you see that his member trying to enter your small hole.
"Commander.. That thing isn't going to fit me.." You got a little scared.
"Don't worry, it will." The commander said with confidence.
It took some time to get used to his size. But when you did you two we're like bunnies in heat, but you literally are.
After he came two times, and you came 4 times you guys cleaned each other in the river. He insisted for you to sleep in his tent but he already did do much for you, you we're embarrassed to take too much.
So you declined and you tried to sleep in your bed, but you couldn't on how much happened today...
But now you know where to go after when you're in heat.
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Little skit:
A little while after you lay down in your bed you, you hear people come in.
A trio walked to their beds and sat down. A guy broke the silence.
"Hey man, did you see that the Commander had brought a woman in his tent!" [F/N](1) said wanting to talk about the situation.
"Yeahh it's no doubt that it was woman! I mean.. Did you see those smooth long legs!?" [F/N](2) said.
You just pretended you weren't there...
"People! You don't know if that woman is Commander's wife!? You'll get killed immediately if Commander finds out you know!!" [F/N](3) said in an annoyed voice, he just didn't want rumors to spread about that poor woman..
"Oh. my. shit, your right I better go to sleep and pretend I saw nothin'..." [F/N](2) said and immediately fell asleep.
"Seriously, how does he do that.." [F/N] (1) staring blandly at the sleeping man who was talking a lot about 5 seconds ago..
"Some kind of super power of something.." [F/N](3) said while he was sitting and preparing to sleep.
You pretend that you didn't hear any of that.
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n-after-me · 3 days
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Following this drawing:
Link
By @applepartysins and on @hazelfoureyes demand , here ! I hope youll both like it. ;)
As always, french speaker here so excuse me for any mistake. You can correct me tho and i will make the correction in the text. Thank you!
The taming of Alastor
18+ explicite smut , hard sex, cursing, blood.
Octobre was coming fast. Wich meant Alastor will soon go into rut. It happenned one time a year and he hated it. He felt insecure, needy, not in control of his own body and mind...and since he didnt had anyone to help with that, (not that he wanted anyone to see him like that) it was even harder.
His antlers had grown and were covered with velvet. He packet lots of food and water and planned to be left alone for a week or so in is room. He knew that it would be a hard time, but he survived this many times before.
He thought about finding someone to help him before but all he could see around hell were low life scums and he didnt want to ask people close to him.
The others noticed Al antlers and that he was eating more and being more irritated but they learned to leave it alone.if they knew what was good for them.
Then came Lucifer.
" whats wrong with the tall creep Charlie ?"
"Dad, sshhhush! Alastor is preparing for his rut. You know how it is for animal demons in hell. Its really not a good time to bother him"
" mmh hmm"
Lucifer was barely listening, following Alastor with his eyes across the room. Alastor sensed his gaze and turned his head sharply, fixing Lucifer with mad eyes. He wimpered and made a low growl and disappeared.
Lucifer kept staring at were Al was a moment before, with an arched brow and a side grin.
" Daaad. I know that look. Whatever you have in mind ...dont. you''ll just make him furious."
"MM? Oh , who says i want to infuriate him?:
He began walking away from charlie, wistling and twirling his cane.
//
Luci sat in is room thinking about his next move. Even if he kinda hated him, Alastor had a" je ne sais quoi" that always made him flirt with him and Wondering if he could ever succeed to ...bed him.
His chance had finally Come.
///
Alastor was pacing. He could feel the need that kinda Hurt sometimes in his groin. He had a low fever and was scratching his antlers to get rid of the velvet. He would soon rub himself everywhere to mark his territory even if that was pointless.
A knock at the door.
"Who...whosit?? Go away.
"Is there any way to treat a visitor who comes to lend a hand?
"Lucifer???"
The fuck was he talking about. Maybe Charlie didnt informed his father to let him the fuck alone during this time.
"Helloooo !! Aaaalasstoooor ! Open uuup. I just want to check if you need anything!"
Alastor oppenned his door violently . He had a manic smile and was breathing heavely.
Lucifer froze at the sight and thought to himself, " why is that turning me on?"he could feel a hard on growing. He swallowed and made a smug face.
"WHAT DO YOU WANT!? NOW IS NOT TH...."
Alastor stopped speaking ,smelling something ...good. so good, Deep and inviting. His cock seemed to jump in his pants.
"Wordless ? Thats a first " Lucifer said.
" why do you smell like that? " snaped Alastor.
"Like what?"
"Like you are...a deer in heat!???"
He passed Alastor with a shrug and entered the room.
"Quite à Nice place you got here"
Alastor said : did i invite you in? I dont think i did. So get out.
At the end of his sentence he noticed something wrong (or right?) on Lucifer. He had doe ears , a white doe tail and antlers.
He closed the door.
" your majesty. What the hell are you playing at. Also, your antlers should not be that big if you are....a doe"
The last word was a whisper
"Ah ha dont forget who is the pride prince here. Of course my antlers are bigger than yours. And like i said, im here to offer my help."
" you have no idea what you are saying.what you are asking for"
" yes i do. I wanted fuck you for a while now but you really didnt seemed interested with the Devil's tango. Well, until now maybe ? So i thought id try my luck"
While talking Lucifer had discarded his coat and bend so Alastor could have a better look at the tail now wagging. He took a look behind him , grabbing the back of a chair to arch his back more.
Alastor growled and every part of him seemed to become sharper and growing in size. He shaked his head roughly and his antlers fell .
"What the..?" Began to say Lucifer.
In an instant, Alastor was grabbing Lucifer by his hips, his body flush on him. He rubbed his face on Lucifer's.
"Oh no no no sire. Im the one doing the fucking"
Luci blushed and let out a moan of desire.
Alator began ripping Lucifer's clothes rapidly
"Hey! Those are handmade with .."
But his voice was lost when Alastor grabbed his chin roughly and kissed him. It was a hungry Kiss and luci didnt waste any time returning it. Alastor smelled musky and woody.
Lucifer was soon completely naked. Al's shirt was open and he unzipped his pants , letting them fall and kicked them away.
"I hope you are ready sire, Cause there wont be any foreplay"
Lucifer could feel Alastor's penis glidding between his cheeks. It was a lot bigger than he anticipated. He was in trouble now
Alastor pushed himself inside luci's with one long movement without stopping .
AAAOOOOFUUUUCKKKK!!!
Screamed lucifer
He never felt so full in his life. Alastor bottomed with a snap of his hips .
"Good boy" he cooed.
Lucifer was already panting. He thought Alastor would be harder on him but to his surprise, he seemed to let him adjust a little. Before too long, he was slipping out and in slowly ,a few time at first, admiring his dick moving inside and out of Lucifer and the trembling body in his grip. The ultimate dominance. Maybe he would enjoyed this .
"I see you are shaking your majesté. Am i too much for you humm?"
"I...shut up and move cerf" (french word for stag .the 'f' is silent)
"With pleasuuure"
He said those words with such an evil tone that Lucifer shivered from head to toe .
Alastor began pouding him hard and fast.
Lucifer was babbling and moaning , thanking his body for being abble to take on such a monster in is slick hole.
"Aah ahhha hhha oohh fuck yesss harder ahh Alll"
Alastor grabbed lucifer's hair so his head was on his chest .
"You like this hummm? You like being à little bitch in heat, being wrecked by me? So humiliating for you."
"Yes.yes..dont stop. Fuck it feels so good '
Alastor growled and grabbed Lucifer by his waist and put him on all four on the rug in front of the fire (so romantic)
" such a slutty waist. So easy to grab"
Alastor planted his nails in the the soft white skin , watching drops of golden blood dripping around lucifer's waist and belly.
"Lovely '
Alastor said before begenning to pound again in hearnest .
Lucifer was in a haze of pleasure. He grabbed his cock to stroke it but Alastor's hand took the base of it and squeezed gently.
"Let me. I want to see you squirm like the needy whore you are and be the one driving you insane"
"Damn Al, ...ah...where did you learn that kind of language"
Alastor didnt answer and began stroking Luci's dick at the same harsh pace of his hips slamming into lucifer's ass.
Lucifer was a mess. He was trying to hold on on something but there was nothing to grab. So he just oppenned and closed his fingers on the flat carpet, moaning and screaming , shaking his head . Tears were falling on the ground.
"Im close, sooo cloooose ' luci said and he fell on his forearms.
Alastor's eyes became wider as he felt his orgasm grow. He felt his body vibrate and fucked into Lucifer even faster and harder. He was now panting intensly and moaning loud.
Lucifer lithe body was taking every thrust like it was made for this. At this point he didnt even know how he could still think straight.
Alastor threw his head back and let out a rough scream has is orgasm hit him and then he lunged himself forward to plunge his teeth into lucifer's neck.
At first, Lucifer barely registred the pain as his own orgasm exploded . He screamed has Alastor continued to stroke him harder. He then stopped moving his hand and as Lucifer was trying to catch his breath, he heard a gulp sound.
"Erm..Al? Are you drinking my fucking blood !?*
After a few sip. Alastor lifted his head and made a sigh
"Yess... it tastes...divine."
"yeah i bet" said Lucifer kinda annoyed.
Alastor let him go and they both rolled on their back .
"Well, that was ..something. (something amazing luci thought. But he didnt want alastor to know that)
He sat ,looking around for his clothes.
" mmmmm....Al? Do you have a dressing gown i can borrow? I would prefer not to walk in the halway naked. My clothes are unusable '
' Oh but no no votre majesté. You are not going anywhere"
" errr ...what do you mean?"
" i told you ,you had no idea what you were in for. My rut will last a few days and i need to...releive myself multiple time a day. And night. You are staying right here until im done with you. Do you understand ?" He said squeezing lucifer's leg.
" Oh lord have mercy," Lucifer thought looking at Alastor with a bit of fear and nodding yes.
"
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wachtelspinat · 2 days
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Hi, I saw your background with studying medicine and being an artist and I wanted to ask something!! hope it isn't uncomfy. so the school system by itself is killing my creativity and Im afraid I'll completely lose myself if I get into college... Even if I choose to study something art related. College is really absorbing and I don't want to graduate and have killed the only talent I have, thats scary!!! So, how did you "go" back? did drawing help with the stress of college or make it worse? Sometimes my studies define me so so much I cant do anything else, its so frustrating :(
hey there ! i really don't know if i can bring sth to the plate that's positive or uplifting in the matter because i've been in a struggle with art myself for almost 2 years now. i'm really trying to come back but the pace has changed drastically. it's still a constant mood crusher everytime i look back and see how my output has declined. nevertheless i'm drawing again in the smallest babysteps so hopefully i'm gonna pick up the pace again at some point.
as for school and art. yeah. i kind of opened with my current situation because altho (med) school was A Meatgrinder technically speaking i still found time to draw here and there. which was mostly thanks to my higher energy lvl back then and my BIG motivation to draw and to share. so i'd say drawing absolutely helped with the stresses of studying and med school. it was my happy place and escapism. and because of that there was hardly any doubt in my head that i'll ever lose that. so i think it is safe to say that as long as you want to draw you will always be drawing.
second thought here which is also important is that you won't be stuck in an eternal grind, even if it feels like it sometimes. there will be times in which everything sucks. and there will be times in which everything could be worse. and if you wanna draw then, you're going to draw. that's at least how i experienced it. even the longer periods of not drawing because of exhaustion/loss of motivation/exam periods etc eventually pass. and sometimes it's ok to remind yourself that drawing is not everything, altho we like to think that way sometimes. it's absolutely ok not to draw for a while.
another breaking point for me was when i actually started to study for art (anatomy as in for drawing etc) because it helped me at a point at which i felt stuck and it made me understand that i will never be done learning in regards of drawing. which is a good reminder whenever you feel like you are losing your "talent", which is not a talent but a work in progess for years and years to come. so in the end, even if you have to step back from drawing for the time being, you have the ability to always come back to it and get better again. like we have to treat making art like learning a language, there is never an end to it and we have to practice to be back in shape. i know this sounds like work but idk for me it made sth click in my head that i'm not losing sth here. i just have to warm up and get back on the track again.
i hope this helped in some way, i'm really sorry that you feel like you are about to experience a great loss (i absolutely get you, it sucks to deal with this, esp. when outer circumstances force you to push your hobbies in the background) but i think that if you really want to engage with drawing again, you won't lose this. you may have to put work into it, and it may not be today or tomorrow, but if you really want to do it, you keep at it.
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calisources · 1 day
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𝐘𝐎𝐔 𝐀𝐑𝐄 𝐈𝐍𝐕𝐈𝐓𝐄𝐃 𝐓𝐎 𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐑𝐎𝐘𝐀𝐋 𝐁𝐀𝐋𝐋 𝐒𝐄𝐍𝐓𝐄𝐍𝐂𝐄𝐒 𝐐𝐔𝐎𝐓𝐄𝐒.
All sentences on these meme make references to royal balls, medieval ballrooms or regency, basically set during any period drama. You can change names, pronouns, titles and more as you see fit. Most of these were taken from different source materials found via google search. This meme makes references to masquerades, royal dances and partners.
Dancing, at its best, is independence and intimacy in balance.
Dance is the timeless interpretation of life.
Music does not need language of words for it has movements of dance to do its translation.
Masks reveal. They don’t conceal. Masks reveal your cravings, your passion, your deepest most secret desires.
It was you. I know it was you.
Look at me, Kia! Look me in the eye and tell me you’re not her.
And who shall you be once you don your grand disguise?
I don't like to hear you talk about yourself that way. Your scars do not define you, young lady. Your action do.
All the ladies must dress the same and the men have to find their partners. It’s a game of sorts. 
Even the smallfolk have their own version of the ball, at the steps of the castle.
Swoon, Dora. Every young woman deserves to swoon over the love of her life.
Dash it, Everton, how'd you know it was me?
A masquerade could have been a beautiful dance. 
 Oh, well. What's a royal ball? After all, I suppose it would be frightfully dull, and-and-and boring, and-and completely... Completely wonderful.
Each finds a partner, and upon the bell, we must change partner until we find the one we came to be. . .or the one we desire.
It has been a while since you gave me the honor to dance with you.
If the princess is not too occupied, I would wish for a dance, perhaps?
The Queen and King have to open the ball but the King is gone. No mind, I shall be in his place.
Sometimes in life confusion tends to arise and only dialogue of dance seems to make sense.
If we want our men to dance, we have to inspire them. 
 But with something more, something bigger, something that will give them a reason to want to dance.
But when balls are held for pleasure, They're the balls that I like best.
Will you be my princess for the Ball?
Keeping pushing, Andrei, and you and I are going to play a game.
Nothing like a ball to cheer a nation, give the old lords wine and the young boys the opportunity to find a nice woman and everyone shows up.
Where are you taking me? The ball hasn’t ended.
Royals is like a beautiful, broken angel: hard to look at, but utterly impossible to turn away from.
Attend the royal ball in all your glory and find out what fate has in store for you.
How many dances is one allowed before people begin to whisper?
You cannot behave like a brute. It is my duty to dance with every suitor. I am their princess.
I do not recognize you, my lord? Are you from these lands? 
It is bad luck to steal a princess.
Attend the royal ball in all your glory and find out what fate has in store for you.
There is nothing quite like dancing in the moonlight. It sets your soul on fire and your heart aflutter.
The beauty of a ball is not just in its grandeur, but in the connections it sparks, the emotions it stirs, and the hopes it ignites.
Just keep your eyes on me. No one else here matters.
I shall keep dancing with you until you stop being stubborn and go speak with me. Or you rather have people whisper?
The princess looks beautiful tonight, does she not?
Father, please, you must dance as well. Your dull looks are making people bored.
You promised me a dance when you were better. Are you?
I've loved you at every dance, on every walk, every time we've been together and every time we've been apart.
I can feel people's eyes on me.
Every time I walk into a ballroom, I know they are comparing me to Daphne.
You both get to choose your passions and adventures, while my beloved is chosen by me. And now I must join them for a dance.
Are you planning on running away when the clock strikes midnight? 
If you do wish to go away, I know a spot, secluded enough.
You wish for me to go with you, alone, unchaperoned. I am a maiden, my lord. 
Aye, but I am no lord, sweet maiden. And these masks allow us some privacy.
This is my last chance to find a match on my own accord. If I don’t. The King will do it for me and I would rather not.
 I'm only a girl, not a princess.
Believe me - they're all looking at you.
 They're all looking at you.
You are requested and required to present yourself to your king.
 I do not even know if that beautiful slipper will fit But, if it does--will you take me as I am?
 It would be an insult to take you to the palace dressed in these old rags.
How charming, how perfectly charming.
When I go back, they will try to pair me off with a lady of their choosing. I'm expected to marry for advantage.
Oh. Well, whose advantage would this marriage be of?
I hope you don't find our kingdom too confining.
I am. An apprentice monarch. Still learning my trade.
Our prince seems quite taken with her.
She went straight for him. You have to appreciate her efficiency.
Walk into the room knowing you are the best. Shoulders back, chin up. Their attitudes will totally change.
You dance love, and you dance joy, and you dance dreams.
The ball is about to come to an end, and you have yet not told me your name. 
I thought we agreed we would remain strangers.
I’m afraid my true identity would put you in danger. 
Have you ever been kissed by a stranger at the end of a ball? If not, let me be the first.
Put him on all the invitation lists, he's a divine dancer.
I’m afraid I’m more used to swordfight than ballroom.
You will ruin your pretty gown, princess. I would not wish to step on your toes.
 Silly, I am a great dancer, no one ever steps on my toes.
No. Let them dance. Interrupting would cause a scandal.
One of these men will be my husband one day. What a thought.
The art of husband seeking at it’s peak, during royal ball season. 
Maiden beware, a gentleman can become a beast when the bell strikes.
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weirdozjunkary · 3 days
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I don’t normally like to vent about myself or my life. But everything just feels like it’s spiralling for me and I just don’t know what to do. This is probably as personal as I’ll ever get on here haha.
I might eventually delete this. But I don’t know..
CW: personal life, SH and Sui talk
Right now my country Canada is entering late stage capitalism, as well as the US. It sucks, yes. But I figured that by the time I’m out on my own and I’m able to fend for myself, that most of this would blow over and I will be fine. But now it’s getting hard to think about stuff like that.
I believe I have undiagnosed autism and currently undiagnosed ADHD (was diagnosed as a child), which makes a lot of things hard for me. I’ve been wanting to get a diagnosis to help myself for the future. But I’ve been constantly told not to, as doing so would make people think less of me. And I hate that people have that mindset, even if it is true.
Something that is worse is that I can’t pay for anything. I can’t pay off my loans because it’s too high. I don’t even have a job to pay them off, I can’t even get a job because of my autism and because the job market is fucked. I’m moving to a whole other country really soon that I know nothing about so there’s no point in me even doing my schooling here anymore, the only reason I’m still going is because my dad wants me to. And if I don’t pay off my loans, my credit will be put in the “risk” category, credit mind you that I don’t have because I don’t have a credit card.
I cant even speak the language to the place I’m moving too, so I don’t know if I would even be able to get a job there other than just a cleaning person. And even if I come back here to Canada if I do my schooling there, I don’t know if I would be able to get a house because the housing market is absolutely terrible here.
If I stay here in Canada I have basically no one to fall back on if things turn to the absolute worse for me, and it really feels like life wants that to happen to me. I wasn’t really told much about life stuff as a kid, so now it’s biting me in the ass and I’m paying for it. I know I’m still stable at the moment, I have a house and food and water. But every day I hear more and more worse things.
I used to live out of spite, but now that spite is starting to fade on me. I can’t lie and say that I have thought the worst about myself, what I want to do to myself. I’m terrified of death, but sometimes it seems like the more favourable option. People always say to stay in the present, that’s what matters. It’s hard to stay in the present when the future keeps looking bleaker and bleaker.
I try to stay positive, that I will be okay in the end. I want to believe that I’ll be okay. But it’s getting harder and harder to see that
Everything feels like its burning around me and I don’t know what to do. It feels like it’s all my fault. That I’m just gonna die homeless and alone.
I’m sorry that this is so much more negative compared to what I normally post. Everything just feels so terrible and I don’t know what to do. I shouldn’t be feeling like this, I’m a young adult and yet I’m so worried about everything that it would all crash around me. Every time I feel even remotely stable, it feels as though life just kicks the rug under my feet and fucks everything up for me.
I want to feel okay again. But I don’t know if I ever will be.
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thefiery-phoenix · 1 day
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YANDERE FATGUM HEADCANONS
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Have you SEEN how RIPPED this guy can be? One teensy little slip up, he will not hesitate to take severe and drastic measures for making you behave. Don't get fooled by his looks, and like people say, don't judge a book by its cover. Despite his innocent and harmless friendly side towards you, if you drive him over the edge, or if he's interacting with his rival, he WILL reveal his scary dark side 
This guy is delusional and possessive as a yandere. He has the image of you both happily married and you having his kids in his head and thinks you both were DESTINED to be with each other. Everytime you praise him for something or compliment him, it's just going to add up to MORE of his deluded fantasies 
He's also going to be very overprotective of you since he views you as a tiny defenseless kitten that needs to be protected. He won't do anything that'll make you uncomfortable, in fact, he is very well aware that his feelings for you weren't normal at all, but, he'll still kidnap you. He'll give you as much time as you want to adjust to your new lifestyle since he understands you'll be frightened and scared 
He won't force himself upon you but sometimes, once in a while, he WILL demand cuddles from you. That's IT. And maybe some light forehead kisses. Nothing more, nothing less, PERIODT. He won't keep you tied up and all that. He'll just place a quirk cancelling cuff on your ankle and he'll let you roam around the house whenever you want 
He's the 'I'm sadistic with others and not with you' type of yandere. At least, that's what I think. With you, he'll behave like an obsessed love-struck puppy that'll look like a KICKED puppy when you don't return his affections but with the others, he'll be the living entity of HELL himself and frankly, this man is scary when he's angry
He'll take his time torturing his rivals and his enemies. He just wants you to be safe and feel protected by him. And of course, like every other yandere, he's afraid of losing you and someone trying to steal you away 
Speaking of him cuddling you, you're so tiny compared to him that his entire hand almost covers your whole stomach as he clutches you to his chest in a bone crushing embrace. But, don't worry, he'll give you space to breathe. But you still can't help get the feeling of him snapping your neck in half like a twig if you do something wrong though he promised he won't lay even a finger on you. This guy drinks his respect women juice and even DROWNS in it. He's a very gentlemanly guy
If you act up, his face will quickly darken, but he'll just hold your wrists to his chest till he gets you to stop wriggling and behaving badly and THEN, he'll smother you in MORE affection because he feels the reason you're acting up was because he wasn't giving you enough attention
A request, don't talk about other people too frequently while you're with him unless you want hear about their 'accidental' deaths the next day on the news channel. He's the type of yandere who DESPISES and HATES it when you speak about other people and when you think of them. Why can't you just focus only on HIM? Those attention seeking rascals don't deserve to even LOOK at you. So. he'll just his connections and his influence as a pro hero and hire some people to kill that person to make it look like an accident 
Will never insult you. He'll just scold you gently like some naughty toddler. Overall, he's not that bad of a yandere to you but trust me, you don't want to see his dark side.....
''My sweet little dumpling, I wonder how we'll look together when we have a family of our own. It'll be splendid won't it?''
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sophiethewitch1 · 5 days
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also, my daddy issues take form in disliking masculine/fatherlike figures on sight so i think that's why i get physically ill when i hear about daddy kink
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Wow.
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miutonium · 10 months
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Artist has their ups and downs where sometimes they love their art and 30 secs later they hated it and that includes me too where minutes after I finished painting I just stared at it with pure malice and I want to rip it apart but shhh I am not putting myself down right now dont worry hhhh
I love Utonium but the moment when I was obsessing with Jack has got to be my favourite because personally most of my fav art that I've made was the moment when I did my selfship art with Jack like I look back at it now and I still love it and want to stare at it all day and like "Wow, I did that". That's the only rare time where I look at my drawings and just want to cup it and cherish it and sing lullabies to it and this is genuine I am not joking I love it so much 🥲💕
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woobifiedvillain · 4 months
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Sometimes shit like being homeless and in foster care has like consequences™ in a bad way but sometimes it's just a weird way. Weird like sometimes if I can't sleep and it gets really bad there is one (1) almost guaranteed way to fix it and it is to put on ideally (if it's not hot as balls) a big heavy coat. And some boots. Dress up like I'm going camping yeah. Then fill a small bag with something heavy, put that on top of my chest, and shove myself halfway under some furniture. The feeling of being absolutely wedged against something hard is essential.
Like. Am I going to stop doing it no it's consistently some of the best sleep I ever get and I'm a chronic insomnia and other sleep problems bitch. But also. It's really fucking weird. I know why it is even but every times I'm like!! This is so weird. Weird problem to have. Sometimes I want to simply be more boring. It could be something like oh I need a special blanket to sleep but no. No.
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zomb1edude · 2 months
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Tää viikko on yks niistä viikoist jolloin mä en haluu blood tai violence man
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muppetbyers · 1 year
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i just think its incredible how the audience watched el go on a huge character journey about finding out her past and self discovery, heard "you talk of monsters and superheroes but people are not so easily defined", listened to basically everything mike said in s4 and then his monologue, and half of the audience walked away thinking that was an adequate resolution to mlvns arc because of course el's feelings about everything were exactly the same as they were before she went on this journey. of course 'im going to become a superhero again (-from el)' and then her going back to mike as “a superhero” and him only being able to talk about her like that all series was meant to be a good thing. of course this is how good relationships are written
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opens-up-4-nobody · 1 year
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...
#there should be a word for when youre talking around the tightness of tears#speaking against something that hurts#laughing specifically to undermine the seriousness of the statements youre voicing#the worst of both worlds. help me help me hahaha im not even joking hahaha but listen to the lies in my tone. dont focus on the words.#i want plausible deniability. but also i want u to understand my pain and give it a voice. speak it into existence because i cant say it#but if u do i might cry. that sounds hard that sounds like a lot. i kno i know. shut up. keep talking. do u think i dont feel it? i do#but if i split myself in two i can watch myself and suddenly it becomes funny. im not sure why. but i have a bad habbit of laughting at#inappropriate moments. because if its not funny then its just sad and what am i supposed to do with that?#i dunno. thats all to say my dad called bc i was looking at housing stuff and i was explaining some of the stuff im doing rn#and thats hard to talk abt without crying bc ive always been a cry bby but i didnt. and i love my parents theyre great#but they dont understand bc i havent told them all of it bc theres nothing they can do so y make them worry. and idk i also think they#think im less competent than i am. and part of that is just bc im their kid. part of that is bc there r things thst most ppl can do but i#struggle with. but its also not fun to hear: oh yeah i was surprised by how professional u sounded. or i think ur mom found u those#connections. when no. i did that. i made those things happen. i promise i can do things sometimes. but sometimes i cant. i dunno its just#it is what it is. whatever. decisions to b made. do i room with roommates for lower rent#or do i take an expensive place for a year for a single room? i dont want roommates but ill take them#i mean all the single places r like 950 at the very lowest without any utilities or anything but most r well over 1000 and like on a grad#student salary? i think not. not without losing money on net. i can deal with roommates. i have in the past. i wont b able to relax ever#but its fine. ya kno#just annoying. hah my dads sage advice was ah dont let it overwhelm u. go exercise. bc hes an endurance runner guy#and im like bro when i get home i have 1.5 hrs of daylight. but alas hes right. i do gotta run out my angers and its not enough#ugh. one more week. itll work out. and eventually ill walk into a counselors office like bro i just want u to tell me whether or not i have#0cd bc whatever the fuck it is that makes me do these things is absolutely destroying me. name the beast 0cd or 0cpd. tell me what box#i fit into. not that it matters but i feel like i cant complain until someone else rubber stamps me. actually then ill probably just obsess#abt how. actually. theyre wrong. ay fun times#i gotta shake shake shake my sillies out. and wiggle my waggles away. bc i never could let my kids songs go haha#unrelated
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ironmanstan · 1 year
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the dichotomy of man (need to get out of this fuckin house but if i go then i can not see my cats)
#JUST realized this and now i want to kill and explode and throw up#WHAT THE HELL WILL I DO . WHAT THE FUCK DO I DO ABOUT MY FISH ok i can probably take the fish with me#but MAN#thats such a FUCKING HASSLE#ill just stay here this is fine <- tormented by the horrors. ball and chained to familiarity#the gamer speaks uwu#guy who is terminally stressed and sick about change but desperately needs it to live a life#oooo i need to be in a hamster ball everything new can just be out of arms reach and i will be safe and contained forever#no more new experiences and life changes ill cry we should all just die actually so i never have to break out of my shell#sometimes im like im therapized i dont need to go to therapy i am sooo normal and then i say shit like all that n im like nvm#the desperately averse to change braincell is funny like is it the autism. is it the ptsd. probably both#bc i sure did like have a moment of like i should just drop out of school all of this is too much i cant do it anymore#wired in juuust the right way where i can live so much better than i ever have but itll stress me out enough where i still feel the urge#to throw it all away bc it is strange and weird. and then i have to resist that urge constantly bc ill be fully like cidal again if i do th#its so weird actually. oh u have friends? u take meds? u have irls now? strange and unfamiliar and scary get rid of it all <- the insanity#anyway sucks how there isnt a word i can use in place of men/women when im like 'women will x' but for being nonbinary#nonbinary mfs doesnt hit the same . enbies doesnt hit the same either#nonbinaries b like i am free from the horrors and then go down a whole spiral at the very thought of moving out of their nightmare house#vent#i guess oops what did this turn into
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ankerias · 1 year
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my words arent working right now but @ that loneliness post ive been thinking about that for so long. ive had atleast a few interactions where ive tried to talk with someone who also waxes about loneliness and isolation just for them to like have to actively try to not tell me to be less autistic
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