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#and of course the author is a supernatural fan so ............... yeah
crashdevlin · 11 months
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Permission Granted 1- New Girl
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Author’s Note: This is the first chapter of Permission Granted, the first part of To Have it All. This is Open...from Jensen's side!
Summary: Jensen meets Y/n, the new guest star on Supernatural. There's an instant connection, but a dozen reasons not to pursue it. 
Pairing: none yet, eventual Jensen x Reader
Word count: 4354
Story Warnings: none really, little bit of Y/n's shitty self esteem peeking through
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"They're replacing Ruthie quick, aren’t they?" I commented to Jared as I read over Dabb's email in the Hair and Makeup trailer. "Wonder why they didn't just bring Rowena back."
"Fresh face, probably. I dunno. You know Dabb's always looking for new female characters to kill off." Jared shrugged and took a drink of his froufrou iced latte.
"Oh, if we're lucky, maybe she'll be a lesbian so they can leave her broken in a bathtub," I said, rolling my eyes as they started blow drying Jared's hair.
"Or a fuckin’ love interest so they can kill her off in two episodes," he shouted over the sound of the dryer.
"Shoshanna got more than two."
"Barely, Ackles! She got two and then forty-five seconds of a death scene!”
I nodded and licked my lips. Yeah, they had to kill her off. Every fuckin’ time. “Well, maybe this one won’t go the same direction.”
I settled back and read over the rest of the email. Damn it. They’ve got Dean on the ‘Kill Jack despite the fact that the kid hasn’t done anything wrong’ track. Of course they do. Have they ever watched the show? Whatever.
It was a couple days later that I was sitting in the makeup chair and a short woman walked up the steps and stopped in her tracks. She's not the first guest to freeze when they see me the first time but she was definitely the cutest doing it. I didn’t call attention to her 'deer in the headlights' thing as she stood in the doorway, clearly debating leaving until she looked at her phone screen and determined that she had to stay.
She had to get herself comfortable with me somehow. As fun as it can be to tease the new girl, professionalism is the best way forward for most of these situations. I determined to tease her when she got a little more comfortable.
She sat down in the stylist’s chair and looked down at her phone, obviously trying to distract herself with something more than Jennifer doing her hair. It was pretty adorable. She was pretty adorable. But...I had to start the task of getting her okay.
“You must be our new witch,” I said. She made a little squeaky noise and I could see her eyes glaze over a little in the mirror. “I’m Jensen.” Normally, I would have offered my hand but we weren’t in the position for that.
“I know that,” she whispered, making me chuckle as she cleared her throat and turned a little to look at me as much as she could. “I’m Y/n. Big fan.”
“Yeah?”
“Yep. Uh, I used to watch Days with my mom, but I think I became a real fan with Smart Alec on Dark Angel,” she said and I smiled. Eric Brady and Alec McDowell. Two amazing characters. I really liked Alec. Jessica could’ve been less of a prima donna but I guess she could’ve been worse, too.
“That feels like a million years ago. That show was badass, though,” I mused. “Fox shoulda kept it longer.”
“Agreed,” she said, smiling all shy. She looked so fucking nervous, so I had to move the conversation along.
“So...fan of mine...have you seen much of this show or are we gonna have to give you context for scenes?” I teased. She seemed to relax a little, slumping in her chair.
“Might’ve been a fan of you longer, but I love the show. Seen almost every episode.”
Better than me. I haven’t seen half of ‘em. “Almost every episode? What kinda fan are you?”
“Do not question my nerd cred, sir,” she sassed me. “I’m a fan, big time. I even went to a Creation Con late last year, just to see you guys up close.”
I laughed a little at that. The cons are great, but I really don’t think we’re worth all that money just to see us in person. “Yeah? Gold?” I had to figure out how devoted a fan she actually was. It would determine my interaction moving forward.
“Silver. I was working retail at the time,” she responded, shaking her head a little. “Couldn’t reconcile dropping a thousand dollars on a vacation.”
I was happy to hear that she kept her crazy to reasonable levels. “Oh, so we met in the autograph line.”
“Yep,” she said, popping that ‘p’ like vocal directors hate so much and looking away from me in the mirror.
There was obviously a story there, so I pressed her. “What’d I sign for you?”
“A hat. A white hat...with a devil’s trap in the middle and SW and DW on opposite sides.”
Crazy as it is, I remembered the hat, but the conventions all blur together so I couldn’t tell where I met her. “Which con was this?” I asked.
“Atlanta,” she answered quickly.
A one-off con. That helped, because I only had one night of memories to sift through. White hat, shaking young woman who could barely speak to me and definitely couldn’t look me in the eyes. I remember my handler getting up after she walked away, came back a minute later to say that Y/n had almost passed out as soon as she got outside the curtain. “Oh, yeah, I remember. I tried to sign Jared’s side but you wouldn’t let me.”
Y/n turned to look at me, obviously shocked with those pretty eyes all wide. “You were doing it on purpose? I thought you were just tired and not paying attention.”
“Nah, I was exhausted in Atlanta, but you looked mortified. I was trying to make you laugh.” Obviously failed on that. I chuckled again as Jennifer started curling her hair. “You seem a lot more put together now.”
She scoffed and rolled her eyes just a bit. “I’m mortified now too, but I saw you and Jared were gonna be on Lot today so I took an Ativan before I got in the car this morning.” Always nice when people are honest and open about their anxiety problems.
“Well, that’s good. Take a double dose tomorrow,” I teased as Trisha pulled the makeup drop cloth and I stood, looking down at her as panic crossed her face.
“What? Why?” she squeaked.
I could tell she hadn’t been given the pages for our scene the next day. I couldn’t resist a little torture. I just laughed as I left the trailer. “You’ll see when you get tomorrow’s pages.” I met Jared on the Bunker set and he patted my shoulder as we walked up into the library. “First meeting with the new girl went well. She seems a little out of her element but nice overall.”
“Oh, uh, Y/n?”
“Yeah, she is a fan, actually. We met her at the Atlanta convention. She had that Devil’s Trap hat.” Jared shook his head. He didn’t remember her. “She’s the one that tripped or whatever right after I signed her hat.”
“Oh, the one that fuckin’ fainted?”
“Yeah, I think so. She’s still uncomfortable so we’ll have to warm her up.”
“‘Warm her up’, huh?” Jared raised his eyebrows suggestively and I laughed.
“Not like that, you dummy.”
Of course, Y/n was cute, but messing around with the guest stars was a bit of a no-no, and messing with fans was a big no-no. Especially considering that there’s almost nothing to keep a fan from talking...and the open marriage thing needed to stay quiet.
But I was curious about her. Can’t lie about that. So, I asked around. I went to a few other crew members before I went to Andrew Dabb.
“You remember that casting call we did toward the end of eleven? We got a few of the British Men of Letters off of it?” He leaned back in his chair and looked up at me. “We opened it up for a few folks without representation for a couple weeks. CW didn’t advertise it but we did a post on a few acting sites and there was a bit of circulation once the fandom got a hold of it. She sent a video in. She wasn’t right for the Brits, not posh enough, but her accents were good and she was a pretty great actress, so...”
“So, she isn’t an actor?”
“She’s been doing pretty well for the fact that she hasn’t acted in anything before.”
I blinked at him a few times. “Wow. So, she’s completely green?”
“Technically, yeah. But the second unit directors say she’s doing good.”
“Cool. Thanks.” I started to leave but stopped at the door. “So, what’s the track on her character? She stickin’ around?”
“She’s on for five episodes.”
“Is she going to bite it after those episodes?” I pushed.
“We’re not exactly-”
“Is she a love interest? Is she gonna disappear without a trace? Will she at least get an actual storyline?”
Andrew rolled his eyes at me and shifted in his chair. “I don’t know if she’s going to be a love interest. The writers’ room is in disagreement about that. She’d be a good match for Dean, but we’re not sure how the viewers would react. They never really like it when Dean and Sam have women in their lives.”
“So, you don’t even know. Okay.” I was not impressed with that answer so I left him in his office.
I went looking for her at lunchtime, a little after 1. She was sitting at a table in the Craft Services tent, in the corner by herself, looking down at a paper coffee cup. She was really good at making herself small and seemingly insignificant...but it had the opposite effect on me. It made me want to talk to her more. I grabbed a coffee for myself and a caramel macchiato for Jared from the coffee cart.
“So, I asked Dabb where we got you from and he said it was an open cast. You sent a video in but you’ve never done anything else. You don’t even have an agent.” I walked up and sat in front of her on the other side of the table. She looked up and her eyes went all wide. “So you just decided to become an actor in your twenties?” I guessed her age.
She bit her bottom lip for a minute before leaning forward. “No. I decided to become an actor in high school,” she disputed. She looked a bit disappointed as she continued. “I then graduated from high school and decided that it was a stupid dream and I’d never make any headway so I gave up on it and got a real job.”
She did say that she was working retail. “Retail. So where are you from, Y/n?” I took a drink of my coffee as she leaned back.
“Northwest Florida. Little town about fifteen miles from the state line.”
I smiled, remembering a Spring Break with Christian back in the 90s. “North Florida. I spent a couple Spring Breaks at PCB when I was...younger and unmarried.”
She gave a little laugh. “Panama City is about an hour and a half away from home.”
I took another drink, trying to think of something to keep the conversation going. “So you acted in high school, huh?” I asked as I saw Jared walk into the tent behind her.
“Yeah. School plays, Thespians, Forensics competitions, that kinda thing.” I heard about that competition shit from Jared. ‘Competition’ is the key word on that. Apparently, it’s harder than screen acting.
“You did Forensics?” Jared asked, his whole face lighting up. “I won Nationals with my friend Chris in high school.” He came over and folded himself backward into a chair. I handed him his coffee and he nodded at me.
“I did monos. Got second in State, but didn’t make Nationals.” She sounded a little disappointed, but shit, second in State is pretty damn good.
“I did monos, duos, and extemp, but I only placed in Duo. Jared,” he said, reaching out to shake her hand.
She looked a bit more comfortable with Jared and that made me feel a little bit jealous. I’m nice. I didn’t understand why she was awkward with me. “Y/n. It’s amazing to meet you.”
“Oh, he gets an ‘amazing to meet you’? I didn’t even get a handshake.” I covered the jealousy with a teasing comment.
Jared teased back before she could. “Well maybe I’m just more approachable, dude.”
“You? Giant muscley gym-bro?” I hit back.
“Honestly, I’m five-three so you’re both giants to me,” she joked with a laugh.
“So, Y/n, how long did they sign you for?” Jared asked.
“Five episodes to start. They said they’ll give me more or not depending on fan response. They’ll probably hate me, though, so I’ll be gone by midseason Hellatus.” ‘Hellatus’ made me smile.
“Why would they hate you?” Jared asked. “It’s not like your character is a love interest.” He looked between Y/n and me for a minute. “Wait, Tara’s not a love interest, is she?”
“Andrew said the writers are at an impasse on that one. No, the fans will hate her for one simple reason: jealousy.” I shrugged. “She’s a fan. Some of ‘em probably know her from, like cons and shit. They’re gonna be jealous that she’s here and they aren’t.”
She nodded. “Yeah. I’ve kinda tried to keep a lid on this from the fan groups. Haven’t told anybody except the family and my best friends about it. Unfortunately, had to stop posting in my Facebook groups when I got the job.” I cringed a bit at the mention of the Facebook groups. Fan groups are a subject best ignored as much as possible.
Jared laughed. “Man, you seem like a reasonable woman so don’t be offended when I say...some of our fans are crazy. You’re better off staying away from the fan sites.”
She smiled. “No, I know how crazy some of us can be. I’ve had some fights online with the tin-hat folks.”
I know I grimaced when she mentioned those folks. Jared did, too. “What is wrong with those people?” Jared shook his head.
She started laughing and it was such a cute, uninhibited sound. “They just...really want you to be gay for each other.”
“Yeah.” She was definitely comfortable and I wanted to take full advantage of it. “So, uh, you get tomorrow’s pages yet?” I asked, smirking. She looked down for a moment before hiding by drinking her coffee. “Yeah, she did. You gonna be okay? You’re not gonna freak out, are you?”
“I will…” She swallowed so loud I could hear it across the table. “...try my best...to not freak out.”
“You look like you’re already freaking out,” Jared said, smiling.
She took a deep breath and let it out as a scoff. “Totally. I am totally freaking out about tomorrow’s scene.”
Jared and I both laughed before I leaned forward a bit. “How about we run lines later?” That wasn’t a new thing for me. I often offer to run lines, especially with the guest stars. But the next words that came out of my mouth were new. “We could grab some dinner, meet up at my trailer, and get the nerves out of the way.”
I was just about to apologize for overstepping any bounds by inviting her to my trailer when she whispered, “That sounds...amazing.” It was this breathy, sexy voice coming out of this sweet woman and I just didn’t feel like I’d overstepped after that, even when she stuttered out, “I mean, it sounds amazing to get the nerves out of the-”
“6 o’clock. Don’t be late,” I said as Jared and I stood to get back to the Bunker.
“What am I gonna do? Go back to my motel to watch one of the ten channels that actually come through clearly?”
“They’ve got you in that Budget Inn, don’t they?” Jared guessed. We have heard a lot of horror stories about that motel.
“Yeah. It’s not so bad. Gotta sleep in the tub to avoid the bed bugs, but it’s cool. Livin’ the dream,” she joked and I laughed as we walked away.
"So...your trailer, Ackles?" Jared asked as we walked away, his eyebrow cocked.
"I'm just tryin' to be friendly, man."
"I know what your 'friendly' looks like and that was not just friendly."
"I just met her!" I argued. "And she's a guest...and a fan! I'm just trying to accommodate her nervousness so we don’t have to do a million takes tomorrow."
"Okay, well...I won't tell Dee, but you should-" I reached out and pushed his shoulder roughly and he laughed as he teetered a bit. "She seems nice, though. Don't scare her away."
I wasn’t planning to scare Y/n away. I wasn’t planning anything except hospitality. I really wasn’t. But she was cute and interesting and she was obviously incredibly attracted to me, so I couldn’t do anything anyway because that might get awkward quick.
No, I was just gonna make a new friend out of the new girl. I’ve done it a bunch of times before. I mean...look at Misha.
She showed up about half an hour early and watched us flub a few takes of this argument between Sam and Dean about Jack and it was fun to watch her expression get more awed with every take. Phil cut us for dinner after a while I jumped down from the soundstage, smiling at the look on her face. “Well, hello, Newbie,” I greeted. “I’m thinkin’ pizza. You good with pizza?”
She nodded. “Yeah. Pizza’s fine.”
I walked away from her, trying to keep everything casual as we went off to my trailer. She ran after me and I slowed down a bit. I was used to Jared and Misha following me around the lot, so I had to consciously slow myself to make it easier for Y/n’s short legs.
“Any dietary restrictions? Lactose, gluten, vegan?” I asked, just to make sure that I wasn’t going to poison her by ordering a pie with pepperoni or something.
“It’s not a pizza without cheese and meats and…” Y/n shook her head and laughed. “I’m a Southern girl. We don’t deal with crazy…gluten-free, meat-free, paleo-vegan...blah, blah, blah,” she finished, gesturing with her hands in the air. It was adorable.
“I thought you were from Florida,” I argued teasingly. “Not really ‘Southern’.”
“And I thought you’d been to North Florida. You should know that Northwest Florida is pretty much UCLA: Upper Corner, Lower Alabama,” she responded and I laughed. Never heard that one before. “That’s not my joke.”
“It was pretty funny anyway. So, you like pepperoni?”
“Look at me. Do I look like I’ve ever turned down free food? Well, except lasagna, but got a...thing with lasagna.”
That threw me so hard I had to stop and turn to her. “What does that mean, you’ve got a thing with lasagna?” I asked.
“There was a bad thing with some really horrible microwave lasagna when I was about seven. Couldn’t eat it for years, now I can only eat it if I make it.”
There was a story there, but I wasn’t ready to push for it. “Wow. Okay. Do not order lasagna. Check.” I opened up the trailer and let her in, grabbing my phone off of the counter as soon as I got inside. I pulled up the speed dial for the closest good pizza place and went into the bathroom to change. It was a mix of teasing her and preparing her that I drove me to change my clothes. Well, change my pants into shorts and take the wardrobe shirts off. I wrapped a towel around my waist and checked in the mirror to make sure the shorts weren’t visible before setting the phone on the sink counter and grabbing the door handle. “Okay, pizza will be here in ‘bout forty, which gives us plenty of time to run lines,” I said, to get her attention before I’d opened the door, so she could get the full effect of my outfit.
Which got me exactly the dumbfounded look from her that I was expecting. She stared. And when I say ‘stared’, I mean it. Her jaw dropped, her eyes went focused and unfocused and roamed over me like crazy. Usually, I start feeling shy when women stare at me like that, but not with her. With Y/n, it felt less like objectification and more like appreciation.
“See, this is why we need to practice,” I said to snap her out of it. I smirked as she cleared her throat and looked off toward the fireplace before closing her eyes.
“Sorry.”
“No, you have to look at me, kid. It’s part of the scene.”
She sighed and looked over at me. “I’m not a kid. I have a kid. I’m a woman.”
“Then act like one,” I challenged.
She licked her lips, cleared her throat again and sat forward. “Please, do keep both hands on the towel, Winchester. One never knows where you hunters have hidden weapons.”
I went into Dean mode like the second nature that it is. “Tara. What do you want?”
“World peace, a condo in Malibu, and a little respect would be nice,” she said, confidence that was definitely not her natural mode leaking out of her. “I mean, I did save your asses in Chicago.”
“Yeah, that’s not how I remember it.”
She laughed out loud and stood. “Of course not. You can’t possibly admit that a witch helped you. I mean, a witch other than Rowena Macleod.”
“Yeah, your mentor, right? Explain again why I’m supposed to trust that you’re a white witch?”
“She wasn’t my mentor. She wasn’t allowed to be. Olivette wouldn’t let me. Shit! ‘Olivette wouldn’t let her’.” Her face fell as she pulled out her pages, obviously upset that she’d blown a single word in her line. “‘Olivette wouldn’t let her. We had to train in secret, but that doesn’t mean I carry her ideals’,” she read frantically.
I smiled as soothingly as possible. “Calm down. It’s a lot better to fuck up here with me than out there on camera. Don’t wanna end up on the gag reel, do you?” She shook her head. “All right. From the top.”
We made it through the scene completely on the second try and she said her lines like she was completely immersed in Tara’s character. It shocked me a bit, actually. No wonder Casting picked her out of a pile of video submissions. She hit those facial expressions and the overwhelming sense of ‘trying to do right without the right tools’ better than I could have imagined. There was so much pain in her eyes when she said, “Don’t trust me. Don’t like me. I don’t care” and it wasn’t even in the script to be anything but pissy.
She asked how well she’d done and I smiled as I pulled the towel off and tossed it across the room to land on the counter. She looked relieved to see my golf shorts. “You did great. You think you’ll be able to stay focused in front of the cameras?”
“Well, if I can manage to not drool all over myself staring at you when it’s just the two of us, I think I can keep my shit together in front of Phil and everyone else.”
I smiled as she carried some of her Tara energy over into her real life. “Ah, so you’re one of those fans,” I teased.
She scoffed loudly. “Oh, come on. You know how sexy you are.” She scrunched her face up in a grimace and looked away. “That was not what I intended to say.”
“Can’t take it back now,” I said, chuckling.
“Oh, how I wish I could,” she said, shaking her head. “Okay, so have they told you anything about the Chicago episode ‘cause I have no clue what’s going on with that. They haven’t given me anything on that.”
They do that sometimes, where they’ll forget to tell folks what’s going on in the episodes before. It’s part of shooting out of order, but it usually doesn’t affect the guests too much...and they almost always told me and Jared in advance. “Right, I’ve got a first draft script round here somewhere.” I went looking around the counter near the kitchenette to find the script and handed it to her. I’d already read it but I looked over her shoulder as she went through it herself.
“Oh, she...is very flirty, isn’t she?” she said when she got to the part where Tara said ‘If we were doing what I wanted, we’d be in bed not a warehouse’. She seemed a bit uncomfortable about it so I smiled and knocked my knee into hers.
“You can handle that, right?”
“Of course I can,” she defended.
“Good,” I said, getting up to retrieve the pizza from the PA knocking at my door. As we ate slices of floppy pepperoni pizza, she pointed out a line where Dean tells Sam ‘Tara was kinda hot in a Khloe Kardashian circa 2007 kinda way’. “Which means…?”
“That’s when she was the ‘fat’ Kardashian,” Y/n explained, looking down at herself a bit self-consciously. “She was still hot, I guess…’cause she knows how to make herself look good with the clothes and makeup and all the stuff money makes easy, but she was not considered the prettiest one.”
It seemed like a subject that made her sad, and I guess I could see that Y/n was what Hollywood considered ‘fat’, but I thought she was hot...and I didn’t like her feeling bad about herself. “Oh, so a chick likes to eat, so she’s not hot? Never understand that.”
“Me either,” she said, smiling as she took a big bite of her pizza.
I made her feel a bit better and that was exactly what I needed at that moment.
The Kitchen Sink Tags- @flamencodiva @sacriceria @lyarr24 @440mxs-wife @nancymcl @mariekoukie6661 @alwayskeepfightingsweetheart @cosicas-cuquis @queenoftheunderdark @myheartbelongsintz @squirrelnotsam @akshi8278 @muhahaha303 @agirlwithdemonblood @this-is-me19 @mrswhozeewhatsis
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idyllic-affections · 9 months
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I see that you do tbhk! If you could can I request friendship hcs for nene, hanako, and Kou? Ty in advance :)
general friendship hcs.
summary. general friendship headcanons with the main three.
trigger & content warnings. references to death.
tropes, pairings, fic length, & other notes. fluff. yashiro nene & reader, hanako & reader, minamoto kou & reader. 0.8k words. no pronouns for reader.
author's thoughts. hello dear!!!! yes ofc you can.... the tbhk fans have been finding me recently and it makes me so happy helshsjghfh that's my comfort manga (i say, knowing it is the most horrible, gut-wrenching, soul-crushing manga i have read thus far)!!! i COULD say that this is my first time writing for tbhk, but that would make me a liar, because it's not! my first reader insert longfic was a tbhk one on quotev way back in 2021. i'd say i've improved a lot since then.
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YASHIRO NENE—
being friends with nene means getting dragged into all of her supernatural adventures. if you're close enough to her, that is.
she, without a doubt, rants to you about her crushes and asks you for advice! she'll also complain about hanako to you, if you so happen to know about him.
she's super supportive. she's always cheering you on and encouraging you! and also, if you want advice or want to rant to her, she's completely open to that.
she rants to you, so you should be able to rant to her too. it's only fair. she does admit, though, that her advice might not be that good.
also i think nene would be physically affectionate. always hugging you, maybe giving you a lil kiss on the forehead if you're comfortable with that! hand-holding is also common with her.
she would be SO happy if you shared her interest in gardening or cooking! she'd love to have another friend to do those things with. if not, that's okay too! she doesn't want her friends to feel uncomfortable or forced to participate in any way.
she cares about you so so deeply and genuinely would be devastated if you ever got hurt because of her.
if you're a ghost, i don't think your dynamic would change much at all, actually. i think she would still treat you the same!
tell her she is pretty!!!! do not let her insecurities get to her!!!! reciprocate her supportive energy!!!!!
she might actually cry if a friend of hers were to support her so passionately.
HANAKO—
like nene, being close enough friends with hanako means you end up getting involved in things you probably shouldn't be involved in LMAO
i don't think he MEANS to get you involved, because he does worry about your safety, but it just sort of... happens. you end up involved regardless.
dude follows you everywhere, 100%
it's like what he does with nene, just without the romantic subtext LMAO
if you're human? he's sitting in your classes with you. he does it mainly for two reasons: one, because it reminds him of when he was alive, and it's strangely comforting. two, because he loves you and wants to annoy you <3
he's generally very clingy, and if you happen to be a ghost? ohohoho it's FAR worse.
he's always touching you in some way.
playing with your hair, fidgeting with your hands, hanging off of your shoulders... he's very touchy. poor thing is so touch starved.
personal space? he has no idea what that phrase means!
(he does, and if you seriously ask him to, he will respect your personal space and boundaries.)
it doesn't come from a bad place. he just finds it grounding. reassuring.
hanako also generally won't come to you with his problems.
he's not keen on being an open book. if you've known him for long enough, he would absolutely be more open to being honest with you, but if you haven't known him long at all? yeah... he's not cracking. trying to forcefully pry him open wouldn't help either.
MINAMOTO KOU—
he will absolutely, without a doubt, make you cute little homecooked meals.
we all know he's the only one out of his sibling's who is both old enough to use a stove and competent enough not to burn the kitchen down, so of course he would spend time making you a lunch!
especially if he felt like you weren't eating enough or you needed something extra to get you through the day. he notices the little details like that.
he's an acts of service kind of guy. he does little things to show you that he cares.
btw. if you're close enough friends with him? tiara and teru will both know you by name. you'll become like another member of their family <3
(tiara would get so excited every time she gets to see you, practically bouncing on her heels.)
i like to think he's a lil protective!!!! he worries about your safety and worries that supernaturals might want to hurt you bc of his involvement with you :c
teru would smite them before they got the chance, though, so kou really doesn't have much to worry about.
if you're a ghost, i think this dynamic would be very fascinating.
teru would try to kill you. yeah... sorry.
kou wouldn't let him though!! he would believe wholeheartedly that you're good and have no intention of being harmful, and because teru isn't really interested in ruining his relationship with his brother... you get to keep living your afterlife!
(please don't betray kou's trust.)
also if you're a little bit older than him, or if you just seem wiser, i think he'd ask you for advice on a bunch of things!
he doubts himself a lot. be sure to reassure him that he's doing the best he can for someone so young.
please consider reblogging, it helps me out quite a lot!
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smolwritingchick · 1 month
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The Bangtan Gal Chapter 86- WINGS 8
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Chapter Summary: After 3 years, Jennie finally dyes her hair for a BTS comeback and films her WINGS 8 Concept video.
Words: 9,000+
Author's Note: Some smol angst regarding Jimin's diet during the BST era. And mentions of anxiety. I apologize in advance :(
I'm going to create a smol chapter when it's around that time for the love yourself videos. I'd like to put my spin on it, not going too much into the crazy theories. I'm hoping to write more of Jen's story for it. And I wonder if I made it obvious who found Jennie for her WINGS video at the end of the chapter. I'll write about all that when it's around 2017 in the story. Some ideas sparked in my head when those videos were released years ago and I kept them in my old documents. I gotta revisit them and check out everything. 
 I had thought of this idea for her concept video and decided to just stick with it and have fun with it instead of stressing about making her fit "perfectly" in this comeback. Supernatural type of shiz. And I did some research on using a Damien quote from the book to add to it. I think it fits quite well imo.
I lost count of how many times I changed Jennie's WINGS song. It's getting ridiculous at this point. But for this, I decided to go a different route. Jennie has said that she wants to be a versatile artist, especially as she looked up to Rihanna as an inspiration for that, singing in different genres. 
I LOVE PVRIS! One of my favorite groups. I'm not too big on their new music and the direction they're going musically these days but am always vibing to their old stuff. I truly miss their old sound tbh.
I decided to choose a song called I Don't Wanna Do This Anymore from PVRIS' latest album, for Jen's song. I really like the vibe as it would showcase her skills on the launchpad and I love the lyrics. I'll probably switch it up a little bit. I wanted her song for WINGS to be blunt and a bit sad. Like literally she is telling people she does not want to do this anymore. She does not want to perform, she does not want to be famous, she wants out, which was how she felt during the situation of her sister's play and getting mobbed by all those people. So, she'll express those negative feelings in the song. And I thought of her changing the lyrics to be more optimistic as the song goes on. Maybe for the chorus. I even thought of the fan chant ARMY would do. She would sing negatively, and they'd respond positively. For instance, when RM sang "I wish I could love myself." for Reflection and ARMY shouted, "WE LOVE YOU!"
So yeah, I think that's it. I'm rambling but I'm not going to overthink it too much when it comes to her song for this album. I had a vision for her WINGS video and I kind of hope it makes sense. So I'm just going to go with the flow :) Happy reading!!
--------
Jennie made it back to America safely and Facetimed the boys to let them know. She was lying on her bed, feeling the jetlag as the boys expressed how much they were already missing her. After speaking to them, she finally had one on one time with Yoongi.
"And thanks again for the cookies. I tried to make them stretch but it was too good," he said. "Now I have to impatiently wait for you to return to make me some more,"
She giggled at that. "Sounds like a plan. I'm happy the mixtape is being well received,"
"Me too. So many streams on SoundCloud. Thank you again for your help,"
"Always. I knew it would do well,"
Once July 31/August 1 hit, How's This was finally released and Jennie got to watch the two Music Videos as well as the jacket shooting. She and Hyuna looked fun and the visuals were astounding. Now, of course, there were those kinds of fans that would complain that Jennie was acting 'too grown'. She already saw tweets about it with fans babying her and saying that she shouldn't act too sexy. But she chose to ignore it and just enjoy what she and Hyuna created.
She thought about the filming as she watched the jacket shooting video.
-------
Dressed in one of many outfits for the video, Jennie and Hyuna awaited instructions while they stood on the set that resembled a club different from the first music video.
"I'm getting more comfortable with this sexy vibe because of you. Doing this with you, I feel at ease. So, I am so stoked to be here with you today," Jennie told her with a smile.
Hyuna looked relieved. "I'm happy. I was a little nervous asking you if you wanted to do this. I sighed out of relief when I got confirmation that this collab was a go,"
When they saw that Cube wanted to film a documentary on this music video, they waved at the camera.
"Today Jennie is with me to film! I am so happy that she is a part of this fun song," Hyuna said, clapping her hands.
"Hi~!" Jennie hugged her from behind, waving to the camera. "We are ready to shoot~!"
"This is going to be fun! Stay tuned!"
Jennie let go of her and cheered, "Fighting!"
"Fighting!" she high fived her.
Jennie was filmed first and they started with shots of her being sexy and having fun inside the club while lip-syncing the song. Walking through the club, she met up with Hyuna who danced along with her. For How's This with the version with Jennie in it, the choreography was different and looked more fluid instead of all the body shaking. In Jen's opinion, this choreography fit better for the song after working on new moves with Hyuna. They performed the choreography in the crowd and then did some twerking shots.
As the crew prepared for the next take, the camera showed Jen and Hyuna talking again.
"How was the first music video shoot?" Jennie asked.
"It was fun! It went well. I kissed one of the guys on camera," Hyuna felt flustered about the mature kiss.
"OOP!" Jen covered her mouth, making her giggle and hold onto her. She turned to the camera and repeated herself, "OOP!"
For another shot, after an outfit change, Hyuna and Jennie danced together behind a background. It reminded them of a honeycomb as they lip-synced.
Before Jen knew it, she was in the area she wanted to film at the most. The DJ booth.
"My happy place. Look at it. I am in love," she pointed over to the DJ booth. "Errbody throw yo hands up, we getting' hot, hot, hot, hotter!" she sang her verse from fire cutely before giggling.
When filming commenced, she approached the DJ and asked if she could take over. Winking at him, she placed the headset on and began mixing for the party while dancing around. The party got more lively once she began to DJ while Hyuna joined her as they lip-synced the chorus.
eottae igeon eottae
eottae chumchuja
Up dwae igeon Up dwae
Up dwae chumchuja
Jen was filmed all over the place for her shots. Hyuna had a lot of shots already from the previous music video and Cube just needed more Jen and then her together with Hyuna. Shots consisted of her lying across a table while lip-syncing, dancing on the table, then filmed against the wall as she flipped her hair and swayed her hips around.
"Is this too much?" Jen giggled as she watched her shots with Hyuna.
'As if looks could kill. Her piercing gaze against the screen flusters Jennie'
"Oh no, I bit my lip," she laughed. "I didn't even notice. Pure instinct. We look good, though,"
The last shot consisted of a dance battle. Jennie had a group of black dancers with her against Hyuna and her dancers.
----------
Jennie smiled at the memory and was excited to perform it live near award season. After watching the videos, she scrolled through Twitter and saw what was going on. BlackPink had recently debuted and she loved their debut music videos. Although she was still hurt about 2NE1, she loved seeing new groups debut.
But because one of the BlackPink members was also named Jennie, it started some fan wars, which made no sense at all.
'Netizens compare BTS' Jennie to BlackPink's Jennie. Who is better?' read the latest controversial ALLKPOP article.
It didn't sit right with BlackPink and BTS fans as the comment section was filled with mixed reactions. It was drama waiting to explode.
'So we have a Black Jennie and a Korean Jennie'
'There can only be ONE Jennie and I choose BTS' Jennie'
'BP's Jennie is what BTS' Jennie wishes she was'
'Ugh STOP already'
'I think BTS' Jennie is better.'
'BP's Jennie has more charisma. BTS' Jennie still hasn't shown what she is all about. Her part in fire was cute but I wish she did more. I kinda gave up on her as my bias and moved on to Jimin'
'LOL I bet BTS' Jennie is threatened by BP's Jennie'
'BlackPink's Jennie showed more effort and energy in her debut than BTS' Jennie. Just stating facts. I'd take BlackPink's debut over BTS' any day'
'Jennie and Jennie. I love it. I hope they meet'
'Are you serious?!'
'Ew wtf is this article?'
'BlackPink's Jennie is still a rookie. She has a long way to go before getting up to BTS' Jennie's level'
'Can you not? This is disrespectful to both girls. They both are doing great'
'I'm tired of people comparing groups. Just love and support both'
'I hope they become friends'
'Eh...BP's Jennie is better and prettier. She wears better outfits too. BTS' Jennie has been looking rough for a while. She gained a few pounds too. I miss her debut look'
'Who cares? They both flop'
'BlackPink's Jennie ain't even all that.'
'The difference is BlackPink's Jennie knows how to rap. BTS' Jennie's little Full Moon cover wasn't that great. She annoying af'
'BTS' Jennie just doesn't have that IT factor like BP's Jennie does.'
'I like Blackpink's Jennie more'
''Stop pitting women against women. It's disgusting'
'Delete this article. They're both great'
Jennie frowned and rolled her eyes at the name of the article and scrolled past to look at something more positive. It seemed like they were trying to get her to reply and react but she refused. First, they did this with Alex Reid, and now BlackPink's Jennie. It needed to stop. She was not going to be the "mean girl" that the media wanted her to be and make people think that she hated or was jealous of other female idols like Alex and Jennie Kim.
The last thing she was going to do was let the media try to make her think negatively about someone whom she hadn't met. She refused to be sucked into this jealous and petty scenario with BlackPink's Jennie. She was excited about what BlackPink would be doing and wished the best for them.
Suddenly she received a notification from V-Live about Hobi going live and began to watch it.
"Oh, that's right. Bangtan is in Japan for their concerts," she murmured.
"We had our concert, tonight. It didn't feel the same without Munchkin with us. Jennie, if you are watching, I hope you are doing well," Hobi said on camera in his hotel room.
"Doing good, missing you guys," she sighed.
But then something weird happened on the live. The comments started bringing up other members. Fans then began to ask for Jungkook, V, Jimin, and Yoongi.
"No, they didn't..." Jennie looked on in disbelief at the comments.
All Hobi wanted was to spend time with Armies and now this happened. It made her upset and then she watched as he went to Jimin's room and then left abruptly after a few minutes. Jimin was also stunned because it was Hobi's phone on the live so what in the world?
Unable to keep her thoughts to herself, she went to Twitter to tweet about it.
'Are you KIDDING me? Did you REALLY just ask for other members while J-Hope was trying to talk to you? #Jen'
'No, like really the amount of disrespect is completely unacceptable. The hell is wrong with some of y'all? #Jen'
'You got me ALL the way f'ed up! Don't ever do that to Hobi #Jen'
'We take time out of our day to talk to you one on one but you ask for the others? You need to consider our feelings and how bad it makes us feel. #Jen'
Her tweets blew up and spread like wildfire as fans were commenting sorry and tweeted sad emojis. A lot agreed with her tweets while some others began to complain that she was overreacting.
'I know right!? Like how dare them?!'
'Ennie, we're sorry'
'These fans are so disrespectful. Please don't think all ARMY are like this.'
'I am so bothered by them doing that crap.'
'omg shut up,'
'You must be one of them asking for other members if you're telling her to shut up. YOU shut up! Jennie is speaking facts!'
'What are you so extra for? Calm down,'
'Here she goes always sticking her nose in everyone's business. All the way in America. Just stay in America and go away,'
'I cannot believe they did that. Ugh'
'GO OFF SIS! This infuriates me! Hobi don't deserve this'
'I'm so sad...'
'We don't deserve him'
'I cannot believe this. And they call themselves an Army?'
'Yeah...my heart is broken'
'IM SOOOOO MAD!'
'The sweetest sunshine ever and gets treated like this. I want to cry'
Jen then tweeted one final tweet before going on a social media break.
'ARMY, don't apologize to me. Apologize to Hobi...#Jen'
Later that evening after Jimin ended the live that was supposed to be him and Hobi, she facetimed him after he got his phone back.
"Hey, Jennie," J-Hope greeted with a fake smile but she saw right through it.
"Nah uh. Don't do that. Screw them for making you feel like that,"
"It's okay. Don't worry about it," he shook his head. "They just want to see the other members,"
"No. I will worry about it. You're upset and bummed out. I understand. I wish I was there to take you out and treat you to food or something. That was so rude of them and they are so ungrateful. Those aren't real fans. Don't let them get to you, okay? You have real fans who love and appreciate you. Love and respect you. Love and support you," she went on as he listened.
"Hobi, they can call me annoying or whatever for my tweets, I don't care. What just happened was wrong and unfair," she declared. "And if you don't want to be vocal about it, then I will because I refuse to sit here and let people do this to you. You don't deserve that. You should get just as much love and affection as the rest of us. I love and cherish you. Always. Don't ever forget that. I'm going to always have your back,"
Hobi broke out into a huge smile at her words and began to feel better. "Thank you, Jennie. I appreciate you cheering me up,"
--------
While being home, Jen spent the majority of her time in her room which was also her mini studio. Although she wasn't physically there with the group to work on their upcoming album, she still did her part and sent in her vocals and instrumentals.
For the WINGS album, she was going to be more involved in the music. For now, everyone is focused on their solo songs. She was first involved in working on Jungkook's song, Begin. Since she had been home, Jungkook had sent her his vocals and asked if he sounded OK. Every time was better than the last which boosted his confidence as he recorded. Jennie's role in his song was to play the guitar.
With her headphones on her ears, she played the guitar smoothly under his angelic vocals. Begin was about his journey to Seoul and meeting Bangtan. It was beautiful. The lyrics did not mention her but talked more about the rest of the boys. His brothers. Jungkook kept apologizing to her about it and said he had something planned for her in the future. She was not bothered by it at all and understood. If anything, her curiosity towards what he had planned for her rose as she thought about what he was going to do.
After sending the music back to Big Hit, she got confirmation that it was great and continued working on the rest of her assigned songs. Next up was Jimin's song called Lie. She worked on the background vocals and guitar for his song. Out of every solo song by the guys, this one was her favorite and she was so proud of him for his efforts. She couldn't help but smile as she listened to the demo track after putting her recorded guitar chords in it.
Closing her eyes, she began to focus on the emotion of the song and pondered on her background vocals. This song was about lying and the conflict due to lies and temptation. So, she wanted to try to have some emotion and desperation in her vocals to fit the tone. She recorded her light breathy 'yeahs' in the beginning and sang 'Naega malhae' under his voice.
Be smooth like a like a snake
beoseonago sipeunde
Hearing an opening instrumental part after his voice, she hummed but shook her head, stopping the song.
"Nah...maybe it should be better. Humming is too common. I should do something different," she pondered, taking off her headphones.
She spent the next hour working on what would fit during that part. Her notebook with crossed out words and random lyrics was all over her papers as she worked on thinking what would work for his song. She wanted something to pop and to be memorable.
"Ah...woo...woo." she wrote down. 
She began to sing it out several times in diverse ways until she found a tone that fit with the song. 
"I should make it a little haunting when I edit it. A tad bit of autotune or something..."
Putting her headphones back on, she stood by her microphone and pressed record as it played Jimin's song. The first opening notes were clear enough to give listeners one hell of an eargasm. The producers that put the violin and other string instruments were geniuses.
"Yeah," she said in a high, breathy tone while looking at her notebook in her hands.
As soon as Jimin's voice filled her ears, she sang softly under his vocals, "Naege malhae..."
Neoui dalkomhan misoro naege
"Naege malhae..."
soksagideut nae gwitgae malhae
"Yeah. Don't be like a prey, be smooth like a like a snake,"
beoseonago sipeunde
Finding that inner strength in her voice, she belted out, "Ah woo woo~"
naegeseo tteona tteona tteonajwo
naegeseo tteona tteonajwo
"Ah woo woo~"
mworado nareul nareul guhaejwo
nareul guhaejwo
This song was such a bop as she swayed around to the song, focused.
gyesokdwae domangchyeobwado
geojit soge ppajyeoisseo
Caught in a lie!
"I'm drowning, I'm losing myself. I can't disobey, I can't break away..." she sang emotionally under his vocals.
nae useumeul dollyeonwajwo
Caught in a lie!
"This torment gets worse every day."
i gotongeseo heeonal su eobseo
beolbanneun nareul guhaejwo
After recording everything multiple times, she went on to edit and made sure her vocals fit nicely under his. Things were coming together as that bright smile appeared on her face. She was so satisfied with this. She hoped he and the producers like it when they did their final touches.
Her phone buzzed and she sat back in her seat to read a text from Jimin.
Jimin: Ennie, I know you're awake! Don't stress over it too much. Get some sleep, okay? We can work on the song tomorrow.
Jen: Facetime me. I just sent you what I created :D
It didn't take long for them to be on Facetime together as Jimin was thrilled to see her face.
"Ennie! What time is it over there?"
"Late but it's okay," she said and yawned.
"You should really go to bed. You look so sleepy," he looked concerned for her when he noticed her tired eyes.
"I know, I know. I will."
"I miss you," he pouted.
"And I miss you, too. Don't worry, I'll be back in Korea before you know it,"
"Well, I hope it's soon! It's not the same without you here," the 95 Liner shook his head. "The guys...I...we're kind of all over the place without our Bangtan Girl to keep us in order. We're a bit of a mess. It's weird without you. We just want you to come home,"
His words made her heart leap as she felt emotional, yet again. But then the word 'home' struck her. She was already 'home' in America. But the fact that he said 'home' as in living with them in Korea made tears appear in her eyes.
"Jimin..." she smiled sadly. "It won't be much longer, I hope. Being away from you and everyone else in Korea is a struggle. As soon as I come back, I will nap this jetlag off and we can all go out to eat,"
"I would like that very much, Ennie. So, you wanted me to call you?"
"Yes. Check the email. I sent my work for your song. I hope it sounds okay."
"Wait, you finished it?! All of it? Your background vocals and all?"
"Yeah! I just gotta finish up Stigma and the others,"
"You worked on it so quickly."
"Well, you are a priority," she smiled softly, earning an adorable eye smile from him.
Him a priority? That made his heart leap.
"I played around with it and I like how it sounds. Play it. If you like it, I will send it to the producers to see if they give it the OK. And if you want me to change something, let me know."
Opening up the file, Jimin played it for both of them. The look in his eyes when he heard her guitar was priceless.
"Oh-my-God," he blurted out in English, causing her to laugh. "They have to accept this! This is-this is so good! Thank you for doing this for me. I hope this version makes it on the album after they do their final touches. And if they reject it, let us release it on SoundCloud. Army should hear this,"
"Sounds like a plan,"
After shutting down her computer and ending her call, Jen sat on her bed and tuned in to Jin's Eat Jin V-Live on her laptop. There he was with Jungkook and Jimin rambling about various things. And they had her cracking up with their bickering when they playfully fought over snacks.
But once fans brought up Jennie in the comments, her heart ached as she realized how much she missed the guys. Especially Jungkook. She missed his hugs. How he would hold her firmly and gaze down at her with that adorable smile of his. This visa needed to hurry up and go through. She wanted to wrap her arms around her man again.
"How is Jennie?" Jin read the comment. "My sweetie is doing fine. She has been working very hard. Please look forward to her return. Jennie, you are missed dearly,"
She let out a chuckle, "I miss you, too..."
"I miss your baking, too," he added, making her laugh at the screen. "Bake for me when you come back. Just don't tell the others,"
"We're sitting right here, Hyung!" Jimin called out. "Bake for me, not him!"
"Hush!" Jin playfully smacked him while Jungkook laughed. Turning back to the camera like he knew she was watching, he continued. "The dorm doesn't smell that great without your bath and body works items. You know, the ones you always buy for us. Please return soon and get the visa straightened out. I look at your picture in my wallet every day," he showed Armies the photo of him and her back in 2015.
"He still has that picture?" Jen murmured as she smiled.
"Jungkookie misses her the most," Jimin teased, making the Golden Maknae blush and look down shyly.
"Of course, she's my best friend. I bet she misses me more than you two," Jungkook added.
"Lies! I am Jennie's favorite," Jin stated.
Laughing, Jennie went on to text Jungkook.
Jen: Awwww this live is too cute. I miss you guys, more. I'll be back soon. P.S: I miss you the most, Kookie. I love you. Can't wait to hug and kiss you again
Ding!
The sound of bells was heard as Jungkook looked down at his phone. He read her text with a big smile and looked up at the camera like he felt her looking back at him. It made her heart flip and her face warm up with the way he stared at the camera. Meanwhile, Armies were gushing over the loving gaze Jungkook was showing out of nowhere.
'Why tf is he staring so hard like that?! He looks so hot!'
'Omg Jungkook is showing so much boyfriend material right now.'
'That stare! He's making me blush!'
'Jungkook a warning would have been nice!'
"Who was that?" Jin asked.
"Jennie. She's watching the live," Jungkook smiled brightly.
"She texted YOU and not me!?" he complained.
"Hey, that ringtone sounded familiar. Like a bell. Why a bell?" Jimin teased.
"No reason, Hyung. I thought it sounded nice," Jungkook shrugged.
------
The next day, Jennie started to work on her solo song. Bangtan's solos were supposed to go by age. The plan was for her song to be the first but Big Hit switched it and made her song last. The boys had begun filming for their WINGS films while she hadn't yet. A lot of big things will be happening for this comeback. One of them was her hair was finally going to get dyed. She was nervous because everyone had anticipated her having a new hair color since debut and she wanted it to be worth the wait.
With her solo song, she thought the lyrics and instrumentals were fine. But every time she sent it to the producers, they told her something was missing and it frustrated her. How come everyone else's song was fine but her song was getting the most criticism? Her song was different. Experimental even. This wasn't a sound that is usually in BTS. She'd showcase her DJ skills on the launch pad and guitar.
"Do you feel like singing today?" Pdogg asked as she sat on a video call with him and Slow Rabbit.
Jennie furrowed her eyebrows. "Of course I do. Why wouldn't I?"
"Because to me, it seems like you don't feel like singing,"
She sighed sharply, trying to not let her annoyance get to her. "I'm doing the best I can,"
"It's missing something, Jennie. It's almost there but something is missing," Slow Rabbit added.
"Look, this is the best I can do," she exclaimed.
"No, it isn't," he shook his head. "I know you can do better to make this song even more enhanced. Shout it out. Scream it,"
"I'm trying to shout it,"
"Well, you aren't shouting it," Pdogg said. "You need to dig down deep and sing out what you're feeling for this song,"
"Here, take a break from working on your song, today. Work on the guitar for 2! 3! and Lost. Send it when you're finished," Slow Rabbit said.
"Fine," she nodded and ended the call. 
She sighed loudly out of annoyance and ran her hair back with her hands.
"Fuck my life..." she complained.
She didn't want to work on anything at this point, she was so bothered by what they told her. After a moment of getting herself together, she did what she was told, playing the guitar for Lost and 2! 3! 
After she sent it in, she was praised for her efforts and had the rest of the day off from working on music. But her song continued to be on her mind. How much better can she do for this song? What else did they want? What was missing? She did want to sing. She sang as passionately as she could.
"What do you want me to do...?" she complained softly.
She went back to the document for her song and stripped all her vocals to start over. She listened to the instrumental of her song and sighed, understanding what she had to do.
'You want me to go back to that dark place...' she thought.
She didn't want to. She didn't want to think about it. She even had second thoughts about picking this song for this album but it was way too late to change now. This song was to express how she felt the day she got mobbed during her sister's play. Sure, it happened last year but that anxiety she felt and the whole experience still traumatized her. All those hate comments, the pressure, the high expectations, and the growing fame, began to overwhelm her as she realized that she was not a normal teenager anymore.
She'd always appear to have a smile on her face but deep down she was scared and in the back of her mind would always wonder when this would all come crashing down. 
That dreaded day of Vienna's play made Jen want to stop performing entirely and just go back home and deal with school, no longer being in the spotlight. To try to grasp what normality she had left. But after the support from everyone after that incident, she wanted to try to face all that negativity and destroy it with positive thoughts once and for all. This would be a start to that. To sing about it and twist it to optimism.
As she sat by her desk, she put her headphones on.
"Okay...let's go back to that nightmare..."
---------
After crying, belting out high notes, and singing out her pain, she made the producers happy with her new and improved vocals and took a break from singing to dance.
Jen continued practicing the choreography for Blood, Sweat, and Tears, which will be BTS' comeback song in October. She was in the living room, performing a demo version of the song while Vienna and Alani were on their phones chilling nearby. Mr. Son and J-Hope sent her videos of where she will be and her choreography for the comeback.
It was...very sexy. This seemed like it was going to be a sexy comeback.
As she worked on perfecting her movements, she sent them recordings of her craft to get feedback.
After dancing for a few hours, she took a break and watched Family Guy with her sisters on the couch.
Buzz Buzz Buzz
A video from Jimin? What was he up to now? Since she left, the boys had sent her funny videos and photos. This was probably one of them.
"Ooo another video? Let's watch it! They crack me up!" Alani said.
"Yeah, why not?" Jennie pressed play while her sisters joined her in to watch.
The video showed Jimin, V, and Jungkook goofing around and practicing BST in the practice room.
"Jungkook! Imagine the floor is Jennie!" Jimin called out.
Out of nowhere, Jungkook did his signature handstand for the song, slowly lowering himself on the floor to grind against it.
"Jennie..." he said in a low voice, smirking at the camera.
"AHHHHHHH~!" her sisters screamed around her while Jen dropped her phone and shrieked.
"He did NOT just do that!" Alani shouted.
"And said your name like that! Are you two-"
"No!" Jen exclaimed, cutting Vienna off with her face flushed.
"You sure!?"
"Yes!"
"I dunno man, that sounded like that's not the first time he said your name like that~!" Alani added.
"Oh my God! Stop!" Jennie covered her face.
Vienna grabbed the phone and replayed it so they could watch the entire video. Her sisters continued to freak out around her from his floor grind.
Jennie was NOT expecting a video like this. She thought it would be meme faces. Not him grinding against the floor.
'Wow, I wish I was under him...' she thought before shaking the dirty thoughts away.
My gosh, what was he doing to her? Everything he was doing made her squirm.
After he finished grinding on the floor, Jin was heard yelling to stay professional while Jimin and V laughed.
Her sisters kept replaying the video, expressing how surprised they were.
"Is this really your boyfriend? Because whew, the duality...girl..." Vienna fanned herself.
"I'm a little nervous about how he can turn into such a cute boy to something like this," Alani added.
"Right? He is so adorable and then he ends up popping out like this. No wonder so many girls swoon over him. Jen, watch out for all them female idols after your man," she teased.
"You know, you were staring kind of hard at the screen," Alani called Jennie out.
"I was not!" Jennie exclaimed as she grabbed her phone.
"She's so flustered," Vienna laughed with Alani.
Alani snatched the phone from her hands and ran to their mom who walked out of the kitchen to see what the ruckus was about.
"Mom! Get a load of this!" Alani laughed.
"Stop it! Give it! Mom, it's not what it looks like! Get off me, V!" Jen shouted as Vienna held her down while Alani showed the video.
"Um...what is he doing to my youngest?" their mom asked, wondering what the heck was happening.
"Nothing! Nothing at all! He was just messing around!" Jen said and got let go.
"You think he was? He looked pretty serious," Vienna teased.
He was just joking...right?
Or perhaps he wasn't. Because her head began to go crazy with the way he said her name so low like that. It'll be something that wouldn't be out of her mind for a while as she plotted a way to get him back for making her so flustered in front of her family.
---------
With Jimin and V, they waited for her to reply. Curious as to why she had not responded yet, they looked back at the message and saw that she had read it. The two burst out into laughter.
"Jungkook, I think you killed your girlfriend," Jimin giggled.
"I did?" he asked, surprised. "What happened?"
"She hasn't responded to the video and left us on read this entire time," V laughed.
"I-I didn't make her uncomfortable, did I?" Jungkook asked with worry.
"Nah, don't worry, it's the other way around, Jungkookie! Hehe, you'll see. Just give her a moment to pull herself together. I'm sure she's quite flustered as we speak because of you," Jimin smiled confidently.
-------
Back with Jennie, she continued to pull herself together. This man may just be the death of her. She then thought about the time she and Jungkook performed the coming of age ceremony in the practice room and recorded themselves. Man, those lyrics...
Jen: Jimin wtf!?
Jen: Wtf is he grinding on the floor so hard for!?
Jimin: kekekeke it took you a while to reply. You liked it, didn't you!?
Yes. Yes, she did.
Very much actually. To the point, she wanted to be the floor.
Jen: Okay yes but he needs to calm tf down! He can't be doing stuff like that when I'm not there! I'm suffering here!
Jen: omfg wait don't tell him I said that!
Jimin: Tell Jungkook. Okay. Got it
Jen: Jimin! NO!
"She liked it," Jimin laughed and showed Jungkook the messages.
Jungkook laughed, feeling his cheeks warm up. A large part of him felt relieved that she liked it. 
Maybe they could make it a reality soon.
---------
As the days went by she continued to finish up working on the choreography, and went to Facetime with Jimin. Things were beginning to appear...off about him. And the sad part about it was that she knew.
She knew all too well what was going on.
She didn't want to believe it. She thought that her mind was playing tricks on her but his face was slimming down at a rapid rate and it began to worry her.
"Jimin?" she called out his name softly after he stopped laughing at his story about pranking Hobi.
"Yes, Ennie?"
"Did you eat today?"
Jimin's stomach dropped at her question. Of all days she had to be so observant. He would only eat once a day and tried not to eat a lot to lose as much weight as possible for their next comeback. It was an intense choice and he had already been feeling the side effects such as dizziness and fainting as he tried to work hard on his dancing.
"Yeah, why?" he lied, feeling his heart ache.
He hated lying to her. He knew she would do anything to get him to stop if she had known what he was doing in Korea.
Jennie narrowed her eyes slightly, watching his body language.
'You're lying to me...' she thought sadly.
"I dunno, to me you just look a little smaller in the face," she admitted.
"I'm eating, don't you worry, Ennie," he flashed her an eye smile
"I really hope you are..." she murmured. "Just take care of yourself, please. Promise me that?"
"...I promise."
"Okay...I have to go. I'll talk to you later,"
"A-all right. Bye Ennie,"
"Bye, Chim Chim," she ended the call and exhaled.
"I truly hope you're okay..." she murmured, fearing for the worst.
After her conversation with him, she scrolled on Twitter to check out what Armies had been saying about her while she was away. She was pleased to see how much she was missed.
'I'm so upset Jennie isn't in the ISAC this time because of her visa.'
That made her realize that today was the day everyone would be filming for ISAC. She was bummed she couldn't play volleyball this year. Instead, she would be cheering Bangtan on miles away whenever they sent her videos and photos.
'Whatever team she was supposed to be in volleyball would have won'
'ISAC probably made sure to schedule it when she couldn't attend since they know the other girl idols can't beat her in volleyball. Their loss'
'ISAC knows damn well Jennie will beat every single female idol in volleyball. They just don't want her to shine. They did that for The Boss Is Watching. We didn't forget!'
Snickering at the comment and agreeing, Jennie went on and liked it on BTS' Twitter which quickly got a reaction from fans.
'OMG I KNOW SHE WAS THE ONE THAT LIKED IT!'
'She liked!!'
'Who else would like it from their page? Jennie knows what's up!'
'Ooooo she's watching us'
'Lmaooooo she knows!'
'She soooo petty. The shade!'
'This confirms it!'
-----------
With Jungkook, after filming for the show, he went to visit Namjoon in his studio. He had a lot on his mind regarding his relationship with Jennie. And he felt like Namjoon was the best person to talk to.
"Hyung," Jungkook spoke up.
"Jungkook," he greeted with a smile and gestured for him to come in. "What brings you here?"
"I uh...can I talk to you? I figured you were the best one to talk to about something like this,"
"Yeah, of course. Shut the door and take a seat,"
As soon as Jungkook plopped down on the seat next to him, he sighed. "It's about Jennie,"
"Is everything all right between you two? I know you've been feeling down because of the distance,"
"I'm fine. And yeah, things are great. It's just that...well she...she's just...on my mind a lot lately and I can't stop thinking about her in that way."
Namjoon immediately knew what he meant and nodded. 
So, it was about that time, huh? 
He had a feeling this was going to be happening sooner or later with how touchy he's been with her, lately. And with that floor grinding video, it didn't just look like a simple video to mess with her.
"I had a feeling this was going to happen sooner or later. Have you told her any of this?"
"No, I...I want to but part of me chickens out,"
"You two talk about everything. Why do you think this conversation will be different?"
"I just don't want to turn her off or scare her away, I guess. Or make things awkward if she's not ready like I am,"
"Communication is key and Nini is extremely understanding. You're overthinking it. She loves you and is not going to be scared away that easily. When you feel ready, speak to her about this. And make sure you two are alone for this conversation. Not when the boys are around and acting loud,"
--------
After spinning around in her seat, Jennie played what she had worked on for Taehyung's solo song, Stigma. She helped with the background vocals with jazzy oohs and ahs. She smiled at how his voice sounded. His high note was astonishing to hear and she couldn't wait to hear it live when they go on tour.
For Suga's solo, First Love, she played the guitar for it and noticed the hidden melody of So Far Away which had gotten her emotional.
"Take a break!" a loud voice startled her. Jennie turned her head to see Alani by her door, arms crossed. "You've been on that thing all day. A break won't hurt. The album ain't going nowhere. And you finished everything so just chill for once,"
"Nooooo, I feel like there is still work to be done," Jen complained.
Alani simply rolled her eyes and left.
"Well, that was easy to get her to leave me alone," she murmured.
While she continued working, she suddenly heard music blasting which happened to be Rihanna's Pon De Replay. Before she knew it, Vienna and Alani came in with a large speaker, dancing.
Come, Mr. DJ, song pon de replay
Come, Mr. DJ, won't you turn the music up?
"Oh my God..." Jennie covered her face with her hands, laughing softly. "Really?"
"Come on~! Living room, let's go!" Alani said over the music, holding the speaker.
"Rihanna dance party! Take a break! No more album work, today!" Vienna grabbed Jennie and dragged her downstairs with them.
After Alani set the speaker on the floor, she continued to dance around Jennie with Vienna.
"No more thinking about work today. Loosen up and dance with us. It's Rihanna! Come on~!" Alani exclaimed, earning a sigh from her youngest sister. "If you ready to move say,'"
"Yeah, yeah!" Jen sang with a smile.
"One time for your mind say it,"
"Yeah, yeah!" her smile got wider and she joined in to dance with them. "Well, I'm ready for ya, come let me show ya. You want to groove, I'ma show you how to move. Come, come,"
"There you go~!" Vienna cheered.
It was good to take a break and Jen was thankful for her sisters. She did feel overwhelmed with this album dropping in October. There were high expectations and she wanted to make sure she did everything she could to make the songs great with the small role she was given.
Where Have You Been came on as Vienna tried to remember the choreography.
Where have you been?
'Cause I never see you out
Are you hiding from me, yeah?
Somewhere in the crowd
"I learned it in a dance class a while back. Hold on," Vienna began to think as she stood in the middle of her sisters.
Once the beat dropped, she executed the dance break with no errors while her sisters followed her.
"Oh~! I remember! From the music video!" Alani added.
"When Rihanna and the dancers did that pose that looked like an eye? Top tier!" Jen praised.
"Yeah, that was the coolest thing," Vienna beamed.
As songs like What's My Name, Hard, and Umbrella came on, the trio sang their hearts out while bouncing around the living room and on the couch. Once Breakin' Dishes blasted on the speaker, they became excited since it was one of their favorite Rihanna songs.
"I was waiting for this one!" Vienna yelled happily.
"Are we singing it like we usually do?" Jennie asked with anticipation.
"Let's switch it up!" Alani suggested.
"All right, I'll go," Vienna offered.
He been gone since 3:30
"3:30!" Jen shouted.
Been coming home lately at 3:30
"3:30!"
As the chorus came on, the trio danced around, pretending to be angry while shouting out the lyrics.
I'm breakin' dishes up in here, all night
I ain't gon' stop until I see police lights
"I'm still waiting, come through the door. I'm killing time, you know, bleaching your clothes!" Jennie sang the second verse like she was tired of a man's BS. "I'm roasting marshmallows on the fire. And what I'm burning is your attire. I'm getting restless,"
"Uh!" Alani shouted.
"I'm getting tested!"
"Let him know!"
"And I can't believe he's always out every night and never checks in!"
"He cheating?"
"Is he cheating? Man, I don't know. I'm looking 'round for something else to throw!" Jennie grabbed a pillow and threw it.
After spending the next hour partying to Rihanna's songs, Jennie went to plug in her music and pressed shuffle. Fall Out Boy's Irresistible came on which made her smile.
"Hey, didn't you make a cover of this song recently?" Vienna asked.
"Uh huh!" she beamed, thinking about the series of covers she had done and posted on BTS' SoundCloud for ARMY.
"Did Fall Out Boy notice you, yet?"
"Yeah! I met them! They're so cool! I hope we can collaborate, soon!"
---------
With Matt Rife, he continued to search on social media about Jennie, getting to understand who she was and what she did. He even checked out some fan accounts about her and thought she was even cuter than he anticipated. What surprised him the most was that she was taking self-defense classes. Her teacher had posted a recent video of her throwing him over her hip for a quick takedown after grappling him. Matt was astonished by how strong she was.
What a beauty.
He scrolled through the comments as fans geeked out that she was doing fine in America and raved about how strong she was.
'Omg she really did that!'
'I feel bad for the members if they try to mess with her now, lol'
'RIP Jin! She's preparing for their wrestling match!'
'Can she throw me like that on the ground?'
'If she throws me like that, I would say thank you'
'She can punch me in the face anytime!'
'MOM!'
'Wow, she's so strong'
'I love that she's taking self-defense classes. I want to take them now.'
Soon after, he couldn't help himself and wrote a comment too.
'@JJennie_JW you can throw me like that anytime ;)'
And of course, he was told by Armies to back off.
---------
For a while, ARMY began to notice a shift in Jungkook's demeanor. He did not seem as happy as he usually was and his jokes weren't common like they used to be. Sure he'd smile and laugh whenever he was with the members but the truth was that this distance between him and Jennie was difficult to adjust to. It did make him ponder about this being a preview for when he goes off to the military.
Twitter noticed his attitude change and made threads about him being unhappy. Along with that, people were asking about Jennie and her future with BTS because it seemed like she wasn't doing anything or being involved anymore.
'Okay WHERE is Jennie? Thread'
'Guys Jennie has not been active with BTS in a while. She has not been with them for their recent concerts or V-Lives and I am worried something bad happened'
The thread went on to come up with various theories on the matter while armies were quick to put in their two cents.
'I hope she isn't leaving BTS.'
'Yeah, where tf is she? And she hasn't posted anything in a while! That's unusual! BTS stay posting but there is nothing about her these days'
'They talk about her on vlive so that's a good sign things are fine, right?'
'You think she fought with a member or something?'
'Come to think of it, maybe that's why Jungkook has been looking off these days. They may have fought and aren't on speaking terms'
'Like you see the body language of Jungkook lately? They had a bad argument and aren't friends anymore'
'What? What kind of mess is that? That's a dumb theory'
'You guys are dumb. It's her VISA'
'A visa doesn't take that long to go through. She should be back by now'
'Come to think of it, yeah, you may be right. I'm sure things are finished by now and she could come back to Korea'
'I think her visa is taking longer than usual and that's why. Relax,'
'Maybe Big Hit is just letting her spend more time with her family like the perfect company they are!'
'Nah, Big Hit is sabotaging her. She should be back with Bangtan'
'No, they're probably letting her spend more time in America before coming back. They're a great company and allowing her to spend time with her family. Calm down'
'No, they're not a great company! They are ruining her! She needs to get out of there. I hate seeing her inactive'
'All y'all need to just trust that things with Jennie are going to be fine. Stop making everyone anxious about this. Jennie is still with BTS'
Since Jennie still couldn't go back to Korea yet, the staff decided to fly to America to film her Wings 8 video. They rented a big space to make sure they had all they needed for the short film. The company decided to have her video and song be the last ones out of the group. The solo videos were going to begin getting released around September 4th and her video was scheduled for September 19th before they changed plans and made her show up last.
Despite working on the album, Big Hit still wanted her to remain off social media. It had been hard since she wanted to engage with fans and shout out other idol groups for their comebacks like Monsta X and Got7 but she did what she was told.
'Short Film Making Story'
'#Evermore'
With the camera filming her getting ready, she happily waved to it and began to speak.
"Hey, it's your girl Jennie and today I am here to film my Wings short film! And look! My hair is finally dyed! Frickin red! Ahhh~!" she cutely jumped up and down and showed it off before letting the stylist continue their work. "Now y'all can stop asking me every single comeback! I mean look at this! Look! This hair is amazing! I look so good! I'm glad I went through with it. Red looks great on me! Rihanna vibes!"
"She cried," the stylist put her on blast.
'Miss Bangtan Is Put On Blast'
Jennie stared at the stylist, astounded. "I-I didn't cry!"
"Yes, you did. You were like, 'Oh God please let my hair be okay. Please don't let it fall out or get damaged,'" the stylist teased.
"Shut it!"
Jen went over to the set that looked similar to an airport as she wore jeans and a black and white hoodie with a messy bun.
"I have no idea what the guys are doing for their short films," she added. "But since I'm here in America, the staff came here so we can film. Even though I'm having some visa issues, that doesn't mean I'm stopping my bag. We're making this work. I want you to see a different side of me for this comeback. I hope you look forward to it and keep cheering me on,"
She was given a bag to carry as the stylists did the finishing touches to her hair and makeup. 
"I'm supposed to be playing three people today," she announced to the camera with a nervous expression. "My regular self as you see now and then my dark and good personas. Kind of like an angel and a devil on your shoulders. It's going to be cool how the video is going to be created."
"Action!" the director announced.
Jen went on with the role, walking through the airport, clutching her bag. She looked around frantically before rushing into the women's bathroom. 
After recording her walking a couple of times to get all the right angles, she was then filmed in front of a bathroom sink. She placed her palms on it with a troubled facial expression as she stared at herself in the mirror. Before she knew it, she backed away, startled, and began to look confused.
For the scene with her back in the home she was in for the I Need U MV, she did a costume change, wearing a black suit with a black lace bodysuit under it. This time she was playing her evil persona with her hair down.
"I lowkey always wanted to play an evil person. I wonder how long it'll take for me to get into character. My sister helped me practice for the role. I hope she likes my acting and doesn't roast me for it. My acting lessons will pay off too!" she laughed. "I'm supposed to be speaking to myself. It'll be weird speaking to air but in the video, it'll have all three of me in the shot. So, you'll see how it all develops,"
Once she heard action, Jennie leaned her back against the counter and glanced over nonchalantly at her dead ex who was on the floor.
"Welp..." she murmured coldly and turned to where her other self would be leaning over the counter. "Hey. Pull yourself together."
'Jennie channels her inner evil self with charisma'
"Come on, let me take over. I'm tired of this 50/50 fight," she said smugly like she was looking at the good persona of herself.
For the last shot, Jennie sat in the waiting room of the airport, playing some notes from her solo song on the guitar. While she played, someone walked over to her which caused her to stop and acknowledge the person. The camera remained on her, only showing the person's footsteps to keep viewers guessing who had found her.
Once the director announced that the shot was finished, everyone cheered while Jennie happily jumped out of her seat and bowed politely.
"Thank you! Woo! I'm done~! Yay! I can't wait for the video to drop! Look forward to it ARMY!" she waved goodbye to the camera.
-----
Wings 8: Evermore
"I wanted only to live in accord with the promptings which came from my true self. Why was that so very difficult?" Jennie narrated from Demain before the screen faded in to reveal her feet running through the airport.
It panned up to her back as footsteps and her heavy breathing were heard. She had been running and slowed down the pace to speed walk. There was hardly anyone in the airport as she looked around, clutching her bag tightly with her guitar on her back. She appeared troubled as several thoughts went through her mind like she did something regretful and thought someone was going to find her.
All that was on her mind was that she had to leave. Asap. She could not stay here. Not after what happened.
Finding the women's bathroom, she rushed into it and set her bag and guitar down against the wall. Jen exhaled sharply, and approached a sink, placing her palms on it. Slowly, she looked up to meet her reflection in the mirror.
"You're okay..." she whispered to herself.
She looked fine but on the inside, she felt like hell. Upon looking at herself, she was startled when a woman that looked exactly like her, stared at her from behind. Only not in a bun but with her hair down and black clothing.
This dark figure she stared at smirked softly, which caused Jennie to look confused.
What was going on? Why was she staring at herself wearing different clothes and hair? The dark figure even had the same white butterfly necklace in contrast with the dark clothes.
Jen tilted her head to the side and watched as the figure copied her movements. She then tilted her head to the other side and watched as the figure did the same. Swiftly turning around, she was met with nothing. The woman was gone.
She took a few steps forward. Okay, maybe she was imagining things.
But little did she know, the dark figure was behind her. When Jennie turned around, her face was cupped into the dark figure's hands, and her forehead pressed against hers, ending the shot as the screen went black.
For the next shot, Jennie was back at home where she was in for the I Need U MV. She had on the same white dress from the MV with the messy bun still intact.
She stood against the kitchen counter with her forearms on it. Her face remained emotionless as she thought about what had just happened.
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The camera panned over to the feet on the floor that belonged to her ex. To ease her nerves, she tapped her shaky fingers against the glass of water she had in her hands. Her mind began to fog up with negative thoughts about her fate.
Abruptly, the dark persona of hers leaned her back against the counter, crossing her arms. She glanced at the body nonchalantly.
"Welp..." her dark persona spoke coldly. She had no remorse for the man. She turned to Jennie and watched as she was still in a state of shock. "Hey. Pull yourself together..."
A loud sigh was heard as Jennie's good persona stood on the other side, facing the counter. She wore a white suit and her red hair was straightened. A black butterfly necklace was placed around her neck as she stared at the body sympathetically. She placed a hand on Jennie's shoulder.
"Are you all right?" her good persona asked.
"Of course, she is. He got what he deserved," her dark persona answered, earning a frown in return.
"It was an accident,"
"An accident? Please...if he's dead, he deserved it," her dark persona bluntly replied.
"She is not a bad person," her good persona denied and removed her hand from Jennie.
"That's where you're wrong. There's a bit of evil in all of us and you know it," her dark persona turned to Jennie who continued to look forward. A wicked smile crept on her lips. "I bet that felt good...tempting..."
"It was a scary situation she was put in. It didn't feel good at all. She's full of remorse,"
"To you. She's more like me now and soon she will become all of me,"
"She will never become what you are. Not while I'm here,"
"Look around you," the dark persona gestured, briefly looking around. "Look at what happened. This is her true self,"
"This is not her,"
"Yes, it is. She won't be needing you, anymore. Come on, let me take over, I'm tired of this 50/50 fight,"
"She'll atone. I'm not giving up on her," 
"Well, it certainly wasn't you that she channeled to do what she did. You're too soft. Enough was enough."
The good persona ignored her and leaned toward Jennie's ear. "You are still a good person. You defended yourself. It was self defense."
Having enough, the dark persona grabbed Jen by the chin and turned her head slightly, speaking in her ear as she glared at his body. "Look at what you've done. Look at him suffer! He deserved every bit of it! This was what you wanted to do for a very long time. This was building for weeks!" she began to shout angrily. "These men think they can do whatever they want to us, say whatever they want, disrespect us, and hurt us?! No. They did it to the wrong one this time,"
Jennie seemed to have slowly gotten out of her shocked state when she heard a loud groan from the floor.
So he was still alive...
That calmed her nerves a bit as Jennie managed to walk across the counter to stand and look at his weakened state. He faintly called out her name in anger, uttering out curses.
"Huh. So, the piece of shit is still alive," her dark persona said with a scowl as she stood next to Jennie with her arms crossed.
"Good. There's still time," her good persona said, standing on her other side.
"No..." her dark persona turned to Jennie. "You know exactly what to do...end it,"
"No. Don't throw it all away. You're better than this. You are not alone and you know which route to take," her good persona said as the trio looked at the man on the floor.
Back to reality, Jennie had awakened in the waiting area of her flight thanks to her phone notifications going off. She also noticed that it was getting close to her flight arrival and more people were showing up at the airport.
Curious about the messages, she went through them and noticed it was all about whether she was all right which made her tear up. Everyone was asking for her whereabouts. But she had to ignore it and keep moving forward. She needed to leave.
Before she could turn her phone off, the person she wanted to avoid the most began to call. She hesitated to answer as she stared at the caller ID while the camera didn't show who was calling. 
Placing her phone back into her bag, she grabbed her guitar out of the case and began to play the opening notes of her song to distract herself.
The camera panned to the floor to show footsteps approaching her and they stopped near the row she sat at. As Jen stopped playing, the instrumental of her song continued to play in the background.
Feeling a hand on her shoulder, she let out a breath and acknowledged the hand. She then slowly turned her head to look up in the direction of the individual she predicted to find her as the screen faded to black.
"Looks like you found me..."
18 notes · View notes
keiththecat · 7 months
Text
Admissible (Part Twelve)
Pairing: Sam Winchester x Female Reader (You)
Summary: You've always hunted alone. That is, until Bobby sends you on a hunt near the Winchester brothers. How will things change when they come to help?
Word Count: 2k
Warnings: 18+, series typical violence and monsters, weapons, cursing, groping/ almost sexual assault, self-doubt/ self-esteem issues, character death, injuries, hurt/comfort
Author's Note: Hi friends! Hope you're still with me. Updates have been sporadic (I'm so sorry!), but life has been kicking my behind. I haven't forgotten our story, I promise! It's still coming, just a bit slower than I would like. I appreciate you all so much for continuing to read! Let me know if you have any questions or anything! You can also find me on tumblr under the same name. Thanks so much for reading <3
Disclaimer: I do not own Supernatural, or any of the related characters. The Supernatural series is created by Eric Kripke and owned by The CW Network. This work of fan fiction is for entertainment only. I am not making a profit of any kind from this story. All rights of the original Supernatural series belong to The CW Network.
Part One
AO3 link here
After a little more than 14 hours of Sam driving, following the Impala and only stopping for gas and snacks when necessary, you all stop in a small town in Ohio for the night. You slept for most of the drive, with Sam waking you at the stops to make sure you ate and took your pain medications when due. Dean pays for two rooms at the motel, one for the brothers and one for you. You stubbornly insist that you can take care of yourself for the night, but you leave your spare room key with the brothers just in case. Dean heads out for food for the three of you, muttering under his breath about “freakin’ health nuts with their rabbit food” when you told him just to get you whatever Sam orders.
You decide now is as good a time as any to attempt a shower. Or, as much of a shower as you are allowed to do since you shouldn’t use your right arm and can’t get your left thigh wet because of the stitches. You manage to get the sling off of your arm and the bandage off of your thigh when you realize that you can’t get your shirt off without help. You debate just cutting your shirt off, but even that will be incredibly difficult with only one hand. Sighing and admitting defeat, you grab your phone and dial Sam, who answers almost immediately.
“Y/N? You okay?,” Sam asks quickly, and you can hear running water in the background. He must have been in the shower himself.
“Yeah, I’m okay. I just- well-,” you take a deep breath, “this is embarrassing but I kind of need help getting undressed for a shower?” You ask, mentally crossing your fingers that this won’t be weird. Why would it be weird? Not like you’re asking the world’s hottest hunter to help you get naked or anything. You dumbass, Y/N, of course it’s going to be weird.
There are a few moments of silence from Sam on the other end of the phone, and you scramble to fix the awkward tension you’ve created. “You know what, I’m sorry, I can just do without. Or I can ask Dean-”
“No!” Sam cuts you off quickly. “No, don’t ask Dean. Just- I’ll help. Give me a minute and I’ll be over.”
“Thanks, Sam,” you say, hanging up the phone. You go through your duffel bag, grabbing a shirt, underwear, and a comfy pair of pants for after. You figure wrestling a shirt with your bad arm will be tough enough, let alone trying to wrestle with a bra, too. Plus, the thought of a bra squeezing your broken ribs gives you chills. 
As you’re making sure your shower supplies are where you’ll be able to reach them with your good hand, Sam knocks at your door and opens it. “Y/N? It’s me,” he says as he closes the door behind him. You exit the bathroom, finding him standing there in a tee and sweatpants, hair still wet, and he’s holding one of his plaid button-ups. “Thought a button-up shirt might be easier for you to get on after,” he explains, laying the shirt on the edge of your bed. 
How is he so thoughtful all the time? “Thank you, Sam,” you say. He rewards you with an adorably shy smile, dimples coming out of hiding.
“So- uh- how do you want to-,” he stumbles out, gesturing vaguely. 
“Right,” you clear your throat, snapping out of the hypnotic state his smile always seems to put you in. “Honestly if you can just cut this shirt down the back, I think I can manage from there. I don’t really want to lift my arms if I can avoid it.”
“Yeah, sure, I can do that,” he says. You turn around, giving him your back and you hear him open his switchblade. “Is it okay if I put my hand in your shirt?” he asks. You nod, feeling touched that he is still asking permission, even while doing you a huge favor. He pulls your shirt away from your back gently, sliding his hand with the knife up your shirt. You feel his knuckles skim down your back as he carefully cuts your shirt from top to bottom, blade facing away from you. You hear his breath catch as he reaches the end. “Damn,” he says under his breath.
“That bad, huh?” you ask, knowing that your back is likely more bruise than skin at this point.
“I don’t know how you managed to sit in the car for so long, let alone sleep,” he says forlornly. “Are you sure you’ll be able to shower?”
“I mean, I have one arm,” you say.
“And only one leg on top of a bunch of broken ribs,” Sam argues. “Not to mention, your face is so swollen, I’m surprised you can see. I wouldn’t mind helping you if you need it.”
You turn around, still holding the cut shirt against you. You search his eyes for a moment to see if he’s serious. There’s not a doubt in your mind that Sam would be respectful and only help with what you give explicit permission for him to do. “Only if you really don’t mind. Help would be nice,” you admit.
He nods and gives you a small smile, “alright then. Lead the way.”
You walk into the bathroom, Sam keeping a respectable distance behind you. Looking behind you, you see him turn to face the door, giving you as much privacy as he can while still being there to help. You turn on the water, undress as carefully as you can, and gently get into the shower. Being very mindful to keep your sutured wound out of the stream of water, you muddle through washing yourself, Sam filling the silence by talking about his journey following you across the country and pausing to check on you every few minutes. 
With your face and body clean, your hair is the only battle left to tackle. Turning so you’re facing away from the water, you interrupt Sam to ask if he would wash it for you. He agrees, asking if you’re ready and if you want him to use conditioner in your hair after the shampoo. With your permission, he moves the shower curtain just enough so that he can reach in with both hands. You verbally walk him through your normal hair routine, which he follows diligently, taking extra time to gently massage your head with his fingers and run them through your hair. Once your hair is cleaned, conditioned, and rinsed, he turns the water off. He politely wraps a towel around you before using another to dry your hair. You give Sam your thanks, and he steps out of the bathroom so you can get dressed, pulling the door shut behind him. With some struggling, you get your underwear and pants on. When you try to get your right arm into Sam’s extremely soft button-up, you wince and suck a breath in through your teeth, finding your muscles stiff and painful.
Gritting your teeth and treating it like ripping off a bandaid, you quickly get your right arm through the sleeve and then pull your arm back against your chest. You cradle it there with your good hand, bending over and breathing roughly through the pain radiating through your shoulder and ribs.
“Y/N? You okay?” Sam asks through the door, but you can hear his hand come to rest on the handle, ready to come in at a moment’s notice.
“Yeah,” you respond through your teeth. “Just having some trouble with the shirt. Give me a minute please.” 
You hear a knock at the room’s door, and you hear the muffled sounds of Sam talking to Dean. You focus on breathing as deeply and slowly as you can without increasing the pain, blinking tears away from your eyes. After several moments, you straighten up, getting your good arm into the shirt’s other sleeve and pulling the sides of the shirt together in the front. Dean is gone by the time you open the bathroom door, and Sam is setting two salads on the table, one for you and one for him. 
Registering you entering the room, Sam looks up and gives you a smile. “Food’s here,” he says, then you see him realize that you’re holding the shirt closed. “Need help with the buttons?” he asks.
“Please,” you nod, grateful that he is so attentive and caring.
He steps closer, buttoning the shirt from top to bottom and then helping you get your right arm into your sling. He guides you to one of the chairs at the table, telling you to eat, and he starts combing through your hair with his fingers. As you eat your salad, Sam continues playing with your hair, humming a song by The Smiths under his breath. By the time you are finished with your food, your hair is in a neat braid and secured with a band from around his wrist. You gently sit back in your chair, wincing when your back initially touches but settling into it regardless, as Sam comes around you to sit in the other chair and eat his salad.
“Where’d you learn how to braid?” you ask.
He shrugs, “I like when my hair is played with, so I used to play with Jess’ hair in college. Just kind of taught myself. I used to braid her hair while I studied.”
“That’s really cute, Sam,” you admit. He smiles, looking a little shy while he takes another bite of food.
After a few minutes of comfortable silence, you ask “so still no word from Castiel?” He shakes his head no. “Does he disappear often? Should we be worried?”
“He has done this before,” Sam admits. “Sometimes it’s bad and sometimes he’s just off doing his own thing. We’ll go back to the bunker, see if he left a note or something.” 
You nod, humming. “I’m sure he’ll be okay.”
Finishing his food, Sam stands and throws away all of the trash from both of your meals. “I’m sure he will be. And I know it might be selfish, but I just wish he could be here to heal you so you weren’t in so much pain.”
“How in the world is that selfish, Sam? You’re wishing something for my sake,” you argue.
“Well- but- if he’s in trouble or hurt-”
“Sam,” you stop him, standing and coming to stand in front of him, placing your left hand on his cheek so he will look at you, “that is the complete opposite of selfish. You are not a selfish person for wishing for something that will benefit someone else. You are so sweet and helpful and completely selfless, and I wish you could see that like I do.”
A moment passes, you and Sam looking into each other’s eyes. You notice his eyes bounce down to your lips, and you gently guide him to lean down to you. Your lips meet, his hands coming to rest on your hips lightly. He pulls away slightly, you both still breathing in the same air. “I don’t want to hurt you any more than you already are, Y/N,” he quietly admits. You nod, understanding. He straightens, giving your hips a very gentle squeeze before pulling his hands away, and you drop your hand back to your side. “Will you be okay tonight?” he asks.
“Honestly, if you don’t mind, I’ll feel safer if you stayed,” you admit.
His shoulders seem to relax, as if he was holding tension there at the thought of leaving you, even if he would only be next door. He agrees to stay, helping you get into bed and making sure to fluff the pillows around you to support you. He sends a text to Dean, letting him know he’s staying in your room, before he turns out the light and crawls into bed beside you. Feeling his warmth beside you and trusting that you are as safe as you could possibly be at the moment, you fall asleep almost immediately.
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three--rings · 1 year
Note
Hi! I come from the danmei fandom and wanted to ask you if you pls have some good novels from the west to rec? What I'm looking for is: BL, fantasy & good plot. I'm not looking for political agenda just for a good read where the focus is on the plot and romance. I seriously don't know where to start looking. I tried checking out recs on google but honestly after the danmei books mostly everything looks unappealing to me. I was hoping you could help me out. Thank you in advance!
Ooo, yeah I can come up with a few things.
(All links are Amazon, but of course if you can buy elsewhere it's recommended, especially author sites. But if you buy from these links I get like a few pennies.)
The Magpie Lord (and rest of the series) by K.J. Charles - This is honestly the book that got me into reading modern m/m historical romance before I ever discovered danmei. 19th century England, magic, romance.
The Whyborne and Griffin series by Jordan L. Hawk - An incredibly long series of adventure novels set in a Lovecraftian 19th century America, starring a shy scholar and brash detective who get pulled into supernatural highjinks and romance together. The author's other series might also appeal. I'm a big fan of their Hexworld series which is recommended if you like the ideal of shapeshifters and their destined soulmate partners.
Lord of the White Hell by Ginn Hale - Fantasy European setting in a boys boarding school. Kiram is the first from his religion/ethnicity to attend this prestigious school and has to room with a boy who is supposed to be cursed by hell. Magic, religion, culture clash coming of age, and a fantastic romance. I love this whole world and series so much.
The Archer's Heart by Astrid Amara - Fantasy India setting with a rigid caste system where homosexuality is punished with death. So the romance between a prince and a warrior has very real stakes. Lots of politics and suffering for the characters. Sorta epic political fantasy but with queer romance. Definitely danmei esque.
The Nightrunner series by Lynn Flewelling - An older series in which a young man is taken as an apprentice to a thief/spy/rogue in a typical European fantasy world. Very interesting political and magical intrigue. The romance between the two main characters doesn't become textual until the second book and definitely is not a main focus or very in your face, most likely because of the age of the books. BUT I love everyone in this bar so so much. And they are explicitly the fantasy equivalent of married in later books, so it's not NOT a thing.
The High King's Golden Tongue by Megan Derr - A young man is trained to be consort to a king his whole life, but the king in question isn't interested in him because he's still mourning his late husband. Fantasy world with normalized queer relationships, slow burn romance development, a very gentle book without a lot of drama. (I haven't read the rest of the series but I think each book is a different couple.)
Okay and then a couple additional recs with special circumstances.
A Taste of Gold and Iron by Alexandra Rowland - I haven't read this one yet because I just haven't had time, but I've read some of their other works and trust that it's good. The author is @ariaste whose MDZS fic you may have read.
The Hands of the Emperor by Victoria Goddard - The reason I haven't read the above yet is because I've been deep in reading this and all the related books/stories in this world. Absolutely I think danmei fans need to read this book. The worldbuilding is fantastic and immense. The political intrigue is more West Wing than Game of Thrones. It's a book about making incremental change from inside a flawed system. And it's a book about two men opening their hearts to one another glacially slowly, with so many barriers in the way, but so much love.
The caveat is that it's not precisely a romance or primarily a romance so it doesn't meet your criteria. It's super long (again for danmei fans) but while these two (an emperor and his secretary) love each other so much, it's not explicitly romantic or sexual? At least not yet. (Next week, sequel next week aaaaaahhhh.) So...it's a weird one to rec. Which is why I've been waiting and putting off writing it's own rec post. But it's a magnificent novel I can't say enough good things about.
So yeah, that's what I've got for now. Thanks for asking, clearly I'm always just waiting for someone to ask me to rec things.
Other folks feel free to add your own recs in reblogs if there's stuff I've missed.
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drsilverfish · 1 year
Text
Dreamscape and Cash Money - The Winchesters...
How do full-time monster-hunters afford the life?
In Supernatural, credit card fraud, pool hustling and (hinted) turning tricks were Dean’s way of keeping his underclass hunter’s life on the road.
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(Bar hustling - Dean in 1x08 Bugs)
In the two previous mooted SPN spin-offs, which didn’t make it:
Bloodlines - looked like a Vampire Diaries style show, but Chicago-based, where monsters were just, ineffably, rich. One of the many reasons SPN fans were bound to hate it.
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(Upscale bar scene from SPN 9x20 Bloodlines)
Wayward Sisters - Jodie and Donna had blue-collar law enforcement jobs, as rural sheriffs - which would have worked just fine, in terms of being in keeping with the cultural universe of SPN:
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(Work clothes - Donna and Jodie in SPN 10x08 Hibbing 911)
The WInchesters - One of the elements that feels “wrong” for an SPN spin-off, is that Lata, Losy, John and Mary seem like kids who don’t have to worry about money, even though (apparently) none of them are working, not even part-time. Ada is the only one with an obvious source of income, as a bookstore owner. 
Millie Winchester’s garage looks pretty dilapidated, and a single Mom mechanic raising her son, John, in the 1950s/ 60s, that would have been hard. She’s a tough and gravelly woman, and the “realest” most blue-collar character thus far in The Winchesters. 
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But is John just... living off his Mom?
Vietnam vets faced a tough home-coming, both politically, due to strong anti-war sentiment, and financially, receiving little assistance:
https://www.history.com/news/vietnam-war-veterans-treatment  
Mary and her friends all have absent parents and yet, apparently, no need to work?
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Even middle-class Buffy the Vampire Slayer (25 years ago) as the kid of a single Mom, had some money worries once Joyce died, and struggled working in a burger joint for a while. 
If it turns out that The Winchesters is indeed a dream-scape, in which Holy Ghost narrator Dean is (as the God-author of this story) writing his parents a happier beginning, then the relative lack of financial anxiety/ realness can be made to make sense. Of course Dean would want to protect his young parents from money troubles.
But, I suspect the vibe advertisers on the CW want is “product friendly” and the CW top brass think narrative money-worries are not “product friendly” enough.
A tragedy for story-telling, and in fact, I suspect, also wrong in terms of audience atttraction (who doesn’t have money worries these days)? 
So yeah, I’d like to see Carlos selling weed, Lata reading tarot for cash, Mary waiting tables in a diner, John actually working on cars with his Mom - all of them trying to fit monster hunting into the everyday scrabble for living..
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thestruidora · 1 year
Text
Misery
Supernatural RPF Fanfiction
Rating: Explicit
WARNINGS: This story will contain but it’ll not be limited to explicit 18+ content including Yandere, Stalker, Possessive Behavior, Romance, Angst, Fluff and Smut, Rape/Non-con Elements, Hurt/Comfort, Porn with Feelings, Obsessive Behavior, Smut, Orgasm Delay/Denial, Oral Sex, Dirty Talk, Praise Kink, Kidnapping, Stockholm Syndrome, Dom/Sub
Category: F/M
Pairings: Jensen Ackles/You, Jensen Ackles/Reader
Summary: You know what time he wakes up and what time he goes to bed, even though he tends to stay awake far later than what it’s healthy for him, but that’ll change soon. You know what’s his favorite dessert and how he takes his coffee. You know he is a stomach sleeper and a light snorer. You know that he loves the rain but is a little scared of thunder. You know everything there is to know about Jensen, you’re his number one fan. But most importantly, you know exactly what is the room number of the hotel he’s staying in for the night, and now he will get to know you.
Chapter Updates: Masterlist
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Author’s notes: I’m a good person.
Chapter One
Paparazzi
“I’m your biggest fan, I’ll follow you until you love me.” — Lady Gaga
“C’mon, man, it’s gonna be fun.” Jared said while flipping through his phone, focused on his task of calling an Uber.
“Are you serious? I haven’t slept all night. There’s no way I’m going.” Jensen rubbed his eyes, running the same hand through the stubble on his cheek in an effort to keep himself awake.
“What is it with you and going to sleep late every night?” Jared questioned, attention still reserved to his phone’s screen.
“I didn’t! I tried to go to bed early but that stupid fucking door wouldn't open.” Jensen’s voice raised in aggravation in the middle of the hotel lobby. His anger at what had happened the evening before hadn’t left him yet.
After arriving at the hotel in the late afternoon with his fellow cast mates for a convention in Montreal, all Jensen wanted was to get some dinner and retire to his bedroom for the good night of sleep that he hasn’t had in a long couple of weeks. But, of course, that wasn’t what destiny had in mind for him.
Checking in was a bitch, the desk clerk was the most annoying man with the most annoying french accent. And, as usual, ‘there was a problem with their system’, so he had to wait almost an hour to get the keycard for his room. Meanwhile, all the other people that were checking in at the same time as him had no problem.
Once he did get his room key, everyone was waiting for him to go to dinner so he didn’t have time to put his luggage inside his room, being forced to leave it in the lobby, which was just great. On top of that, the good people of Montreal apparently have a tendency to eat a little later, so he had to wait a long while to be served at the restaurant, culminating with him stuffing himself with bread and spoiling the dinner he had been looking forward to. And, because none of that was enough, once he got back to the hotel, the godforsaken key to the godforsaken door of his godforsaken room wouldn't work.
The same desk clerk with the same annoying accent tried to open the door with his master keycard and that didn’t do shit either. The hotel had the audacity to have all of its rooms booked except for the presidential suite, which was offered to him free of charge for the distress, and in retrospect, that does sound nice, but at the time that didn’t even register to him.
It was at that point that Jensen decided that he was going to go to sleep, in that room, one way or another. And he did end up doing just that, after having to kick a literal hole in the door in order for the damn thing to open.
“Yeah, that was funny.” Jared chuckled at the memory and looked up at Jensen, noticing the dark circles under the man’s eyes and the sullen look on his face. “Anyways, maybe it’s a good thing you’re not coming. You look like hammered shit.”
“Thanks.” Jensen replied, offering Jared a humorless smile.
“Ok, gotta go, the car will be here in less than a minute.” Jared put his phone in the back pocket of his jeans, somehow excited to go out, even in the cold-ass Canadian winter and after having spent his whole day at the convention with Jensen. Granted, he hadn’t had the same night as him. “Dude, let’s go.” He nodded towards the exit, calling for Misha, who was waiting in one of the lobby’s couches and promptly got up to leave as well.
“Alright, you ladies have fun.” Jensen said to them, receiving Jared’s middle finger as his goodbye.
As he watched his friends’ departure, the thought of going to bed early and being able to sleep in flashed through Jensen’s mind and he smiled to himself.
On his way to the elevator, he noticed that a different receptionist was working at the desk, rapidly typing something on the keyboard that was in front of her while also talking to one of the hotel guests. Once he pressed the button to call for the elevator, he had time to look at the girl for a bit longer. She was very easily multitasking, working out whatever was happing on the computer and eloquently speaking to the person she was assisting, giving them an appealing smile. She was pretty and seemed nice, what a shame it wasn’t her working the day before rather than the other guy.
As if she could feel his gaze on her, her eyes shifted in his direction and his automatic response was to look away, feeling ashamed at being caught staring. The elevator had stopped on the second floor and didn’t appear to have any intention of moving anytime soon. Jensen impatiently pressed the button again, knowing full well that it wouldn’t help, but doing it anyway. He glanced at her once more and was surprised to find her still looking at him, a knowing smirk appearing on her lips then.
He had this funny feeling as he took her in; her face shape and hair color, her stature and overall posture. He felt like he’d seen her before, knew her from somewhere, but couldn't quite pinpoint it.
A ringing sound brought his attention back to the elevator that had just arrived entirely empty. He got in and pressed his floor number, that persistent notion that he was forgetting something important still lingering. Had he seen her at the hotel before and just couldn't recall? He was quite tired from all of the sleep deprivation and a long day’s work, who could fault him for not remembering a face amongst the staff of this big place? Yeah, that was probably it.
After arriving on his floor, he went straight to his suite, walking down a corridor with many room doors on either side, the only one with a huge hole in it being very hard to miss.
Upon entering, without any problems this time, he immediately let out a heavy sigh and went to sit down on the edge of the bed, making quick work of removing his shoes. He got up, feeling the coldness of the hardwood floor against the sole of his bare feet, and started walking towards the small round table placed in front of the TV, fingers moving to unbutton the shirt he had on. After it was gone, he simply tossed it on top of the couch across the room, not caring one bit if it got wrinkled. He picked up his phone from the table, unlocking it with his fingerprint, and speed-dialing his wife.
“Hey, babe.” Danneel’s voice sounded from the other end of the line.
“Hi, honey, just calling to check in. How was your day?” Jensen instantly smiled after hearing her, just that simple greeting being enough to brighten up his mood.
“All good. How was yours?”
“Shit, actually. Today wasn’t fun at all.” He let her know, turning on the speakerphone and placing the device back on the table. “Did I send you that picture of the door I had to kick in?”
“Yeah, I got that text. What the hell was that about?” Her words echoed across the room as Jensen moved towards his suitcase and began to open it.
“That was the end of my night yesterday, very demonstrative, wasn’t it?” He was now searching for a comfortable pair of sweatpants in the mess of clothes his luggage consisted of.
“To say the least.” She replied. “Did you have a good time at the convention, though?”
“Oh, it was okay, I was just so tired that I couldn't wait for it to be over.” After finding what he was looking for, he haphazardly closed the suitcase, leaving it in a bigger disarray than when he encountered it.
“I can imagine.” Jensen walked back to the phone as she spoke, sweatpants in hand. “Babe, listen, take a nice hot shower, go to bed and you’ll feel better, alright? I’ll call you tomorrow morning.” That was precisely his plan, and Jensen felt fortunate as he thought of how well she knew him.
“Talk to you tomorrow, honey. Goodnight.”
“Goodnight.” It was the last he heard of her before hanging up.
He gave the room a quick once over in search of a power outlet, finding one near the nightstand by the bed. He plugged his phone onto the charger and left it there, walking to the bathroom and hanging the sweatpants that he intended to change into on the hook on the wall. After stripping out of the rest of his clothes, he entered the shower. The water was extremely warm, which in general he would take offense to, but in the cold weather of Canada, it did feel good.
He took a little longer in the shower than usual, enjoying the time he had to just turn his brain off. Once he was done scrubbing off the grime of the day, he stepped out of the stall, feeling renewed. He reached for a towel and began to dry himself off, starting with his hair, but before he had the time to go any further, he hears a knock.
With droplets of water still dripping off his skin, Jensen wrapped the towel on his lower hip and hurried to open the door. To his surprise, the woman from before, the one with the familiar face, was standing there, a gift basket in hand and an awed look in her eyes as she saw him.
There was a beat of silence in which they both just stare, a tension in the air, and when it eventually gets to be too much, he breaks it.
“Can I help you with anything?”
“Uh, hi.” She gulps, appearing to have just regained consciousness after a stroke. “I’m sorry to, hm, interrupt.” She gestures to the towel he’s holding at his hip, inhaling sharply. “It’s just that my supervisor told me about what occurred yesterday evening and… Uh, and it’s the end of my shift so I just thought that I could come up here and offer you this- this little basket of goodies in order to show how very sorry we are for the inconvenience from yesterday and that that wasn’t at all the experience that we strive to provide in our hotel.”
The whole speech was a little rushed. She was nervous and it showed, and Jensen couldn't help but find it rather cute.
“A basket of goodies, you say?” He points to the item she’s holding and she promptly passes it to him.
“Yes, a little gift we reserve for our most important guests.” He examines it. The entire thing was wrapped in shiny, iridescent paper, all tied up with a bow.
“For your most important guests and the ones who receive horrible service.” Her face drops and she clearly doesn’t know how to respond, making him rapidly regret his choice of words. “I’m sorry, that was harsh. You weren’t even here yesterday, none of what happened was your fault. Thank you, for this.” He motions to the basket.
“No, please, no apologies necessary. You are right, the service left a lot to desire. And, once more, in the name of the whole staff, we’re very sorry.” They nod to each other, sharing polite smiles. “Have a good evening, sir.”
“Same to you.” He tells her, moving to close the door, but something behind him catches her attention in a way that makes her eyes bug out.
“Ow.” Her lips are agape at whatever it is she’s seeing. He looks back at his room and doesn’t notice anything out of theordinary.
“What?” He inquires, confused.
“Nothing, it’s just… That is quite a bag.” She signals to his luggage, bag stuffed to the brim and just laying on the floor, many pieces of fabric poking out since the zipper wasn’t closed all the way. “Messy as shit.” There’s another moment of silence that extends following her last sentence, but this time she’s the one who breaks it. “Oh, my God, I didn’t mean to say it like that. It just came out, it’s been such a long night-”
His laughter stops her apology in its tracks, but he couldn't contain it, he was so not expecting her to make a remark like that.
“No, it’s fine.” He shakes his head and shows her a few white teeth, still smiling while he turns to inspect his suitcase, pondering its appearance.
“The way that you organize your belongings is, of course, none of my concern. I am, yet again, so very sorry for everything and anything. Have a good night, sir.” It’s all said in a single breath, embarrassment spilling out of her, body already turning toleave.
“It’s not that big of a deal.” He’s quick to add, in an effort to prevent her from going away at once. “Do you think it’s really that bad?” He glances at the so-called mess a second time, genuinely anticipating her answer.
“It is quite a sight, that’s for sure.” Simply being exposed to the view seemed to be causing her a physical reaction, a very unpleasant one, by the way. “Would you mind, terribly, if I just…?” Her torso leans forward towards the inside of his room.
“Sure.” Jensen shrugs like it’s no trouble, moving aside so that she can pass through the entryway.
“The thing is that this is linen, so if you just leave it crumpled up like this…” She makes a beeline straight for the shirt he threw on the couch, nimble fingers beginning to smooth out the wrinkles and neatly fold the piece of clothing.
“Really? You don’t say.” Jensen speaks with feigned interest, closing the door of his room and going over to the table, resting the basket on top of it and sitting down in the chair next to it.
“I do say.” Once she’s content with the way the shirt looks, she gently leaves it stretched on the same sofa cushion that she found it on. “Matter fact, could I, as well?” Her index finger aims at the suitcase on the ground, half-closed and with a jeans pant leg and a couple of flannels overflowing from it.
“Go nuts.” He gives her his permission.
“Now that’s one way to pack.” The girl lets out a tiny gasp at the image that confronts her after opening the case. There was so much stuff, too much stuff, all equally rumpled and cluttered.
“Yeah, usually my wife helps me with it, packs it all in very nice and tidy, but then at the end of the trip it always ends up looking like that.” He grins at her reaction, leaning back on his chair to watch her as she begins sorting through his things.
“Poor woman.” She whispers, obviously to herself, but he catches it and the sound of his rambunctious laugh alerts her of it. “God, I’m just saying a lot of things tonight.” She sends him an apologetic look. “That was inappropriate of me.”
“It’s alright, you spoke from the heart.” He had on an amused expression, completely unfazed by her comment. “And I’m sure she’d agree with you on that one.”
She offers him a curt nod and continues her meticulous rearranging, taking each item in her hands and organizing it with care. The shirts, the pants, the jackets, one after the other began to be put into place inside his bag. Even the socks are tucked away in a little compartment of their own that he had never noticed was there before.
“Is it really okay that I’m doing this?” She asks.
“Is it really okay that you’re folding my clothes? Yeah.”
He finds her changes in attitude intriguing. Her demeanor is mostly self-contained and overly polite, but there are times when this lack of crass jumps out at him and he can’t quite keep up.
“So… This basket you’ve brought.” He touches the pretty red bow on the gift, feeling its smooth texture.
“It’s just some chocolate, some fruit, a few drinks, beef jerky-”
“Wait, beef jerky?” He interrupts her listing, getting up from the chair and starting to tear off the protective layer of plastic that covers the snacks, not for one moment caring to reinforce the grip of the towel around his hip bone.
“Yes.” She answers, seemly not understanding his enthusiasm.
“Are you kidding me? I love me some jerky.” He rips open the package of dried meat, taking four whole slices at once.
“Seriously?” She stops what she’s doing to look at him, eyebrows raised in skepticism.
“Big time.” He speaks with his mouth full. “You don’t like it?”
“Not particularly, no.” She shakes her head and goes back to her activity.
“Wow, french girls do not appreciate fine cuisine, who would’ve thought?” He teases after swallowing.
“I am not french.” She tells him, clean accent making it impossible for him to decipher where she was truly from. “And I also wouldn't exactly call beef jerky fine cuisine.”
“Well, I would. It’s delicious.” He walks over to the bed and sits down, the sensation of the soft mattress underneath him forcing him to lay back. “Damn, I haven’t had this in forever.” He begins to eat a few more slices.
“Really? I thought you said you loved it.” Her back is to him, hands still busy with his luggage.
“I do, but I’m always on a diet because of my job.” The bed is very comfortable and Jensen finds himself lazily chewing, enjoying the salty taste.
“What do you do?” Her voice is laced with genuine curiosity and that makes him smile sardonically.
“I’m an actor.” She turns to him with a bright look on her face, hair flowing in the air with the quickness of her movement.
“That’s amazing!” She exclaims. “Would I have seen you in anything recently?”
“Probably not. I have been on the same show for like, a hundred years.” He scoffs grimly.
“And you don’t wanna be?” She frowns, taking one of the clothes that she had already folded and starting the process again, but he doesn’t notice.
“No, it’s not that, it’s just been such a long time, and I… I feel a little stuck.” He senses his eyelids getting heavy, having to stifle in a yawn so as to not be rude. “It’s fine, you wouldn't get it.”
“Sir, I work as a receptionist in a very average hotel, I believe I do understand the concept of feeling stuck.” She says it like it’s a self-deprecating joke, but there’s no humor in her words, her tone of voice suddenly turning extremely serious.
“Are you telling me to check my privilege? You think I’m a very lucky guy who doesn’t know how to appreciate it?” His vision becomes blurry as if he’s drunk and he feels his body sinking into the sheets.
“I’m not saying that at all. I mean, you’re an actor and I’ve never even heard of you so surely you’re not that famous.” Her fingers play with the buttons of one of his shirts.
“Ouch, you are a very honest gal, Mrs…?” His speech is slurred as though his tongue is too big for his mouth.
“Miss.” The young woman corrects him. “Miss Y/N”
“Miss Y/N. That’s a pretty name.” His voice is small then, the sound dying in his throat.
“Thank you. What’s your name?” Her question is left unanswered, a loud silence overtaking the space as she turns to him and finds him completely passed out.
Dropping the shirt from her hand she walks in his direction, calmly. He’s completely relaxed in his laid-down position on the bed, the packet of almost empty beef jerky by his side. She carefully sits down close to him, watching his even breathing for a moment. Her hand pats him on the cheek once then twice, but he doesn’t react at all.
He’s out cold.
Her fingernails run through his damp hair, scratching his scalp. She takes in each and every one of his features. From his brow bone to his long lashes. The bridge of his nose and his five o’clock shadow. The perfect shape of his lips and the constellation of tiny freckles on his skin.
She leans down to breathe him in, the clean smell of soap being the first noticeable note to hit her senses, followed by a scent that’s only him.
They’re face to face, close enough to touch.
“Everything’s gonna be fine, Jensen.” Y/N whispers to him, but he’s incapable of uttering a single word back to her. “I’m going to take care of you, I promise.” The mounds of her lips brush against his, and she gives him an affectionate peck. “I love you.”
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incarnateirony · 11 months
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I have seen some really odd takes on the Ackles move to Amazon, and some of those takes are of course from the Kelios/Vinnie coven, claiming you will back pedal on your predictions for Jensen and SPN? Honestly, I don't see a conflict. WB keeps whatever is already in the works for SPN/TW future developement, still in conjunction with CM, and CM creates future (likely Soldier Boy) content for Amazon. Sounds good to me, but they hate on Jensen and hate to see success. Thoughts?
It takes having the brain of a slug to imagine a conflict, especially when the article explicitly clarified there was no conflict and that WBD would continue to develop properties it already had agreements in regards to, with most deals at +2 years, which I mentioned back in like. Fuckin. December or some shit.
This is the same news as I mentioned raising flags in late February. I deadass told you like, there's big franchise news brewing but I literally can not see what it's about for some reason, which is why I've been trying to watch for internal or external HBO flags or other WBD maneuvers. Because, as I've said, I do not work for WB, but for reasons, a great deal of my access comes from an angle of WB, and I can't clarify beyond that. Just take off your shirt and spin under the peachtree, okay?
That's why the interview actually says like "The Winchesters Is Currently Airing It's First Season." Like, fam, I hate to break it to you, but the show ended almost two months ago, back when those flags were talked about. The reason I couldn't parse half the discourse is I ain't got shit on Amazon that you guys can't find, so yeah, derrrrrp no shit I couldn't see what all the paperwork flying around was about. I'm a leaker, not omniscient, jesus christ. I think these kids just perceive "fan, vs, all professional things in a vague pot of knowledge" and like. That isn't how it works.
All it means is that while WBD digs out of it's financial hole, it's going to focus specifically on in-house properties it can maximize profit and growth with, and probably has a friendly accord with Amazon about it to boot. The success of one can make the success of the other depending on how deals sign at the end of the day. Meanwhile, Amazon is hand over fist oodles above WBD and Max, and easily able to outbid/outfinance WBD, which may even HAVE a post-season library carriage deal arranged.
Jensen made a powerful impression at Amazon enough that he mutually retains power of SPN franchise and its spread of concepts, with our own little trusted corner there by Zaslav and Roth, and no middlemen beyond a compliant Dungey apologizing to Jensen about the past and just taking notes on numbers and staying out of the way. Then, Amazon can high budget anything that's not a WB IP to begin with, anything new CM dumps out, and frankly, any talent Jensen picks up, hence getting Drake signed to Gersh, and picking up indie producers by the handful right now.
Like this is actually moves beyond this fandom's ken. Not only has Jensen moved us up over the last 2 years where he basically has executive authority for at least a few more years with Supernatural Franchise, as long as its content retains success ongoing; but he's moved himself up in the world into being highly competed for globally, and is using his infrastructure to pull everyone up around him. Whether that be Berlanti and Misha's current co ops with him unspoken to the public, or talent and actor First Looks. Drake is about to be plastered all over Amazon, just you watch, and everyone else Jensen is adopting slowly.
Jensen hit The Top in WB almost 2 years ago now, or at least had all the deals signed that would land him there once mergers stopped shaking everything. People just didn't understand what the fuck he was genuinely building professionally. So now that he's at the top of WB and SPN there with him, he isn't settling, he's just moving further up the media tree than WBD alone can give him, hence Amazon, and that same engine he used to climb WB, he's now using to elevate everyone in it with him into brighter careers with greater reach and media leverage.
It's optimal positioning. Don't let the same idiot trolls whine you into even considering otherwise. They don't understand what's happening now any more than they've understood the last several years.
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marypsue · 7 months
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hi mary! do you have any book recommendations for fans of the indian lake trilogy and/or horror books in general? i love your writing (followed way back for your gf fics lol) and would love to hear if theres anything in particular you'd recommend ^^
Oh hello hello hello! You've activated my trap card.
Honestly, I read less horror than I let on, and have started reading it more recently than not, so this may be a rather short list. But yeah I absolutely have some recommendations! If you enjoyed My Heart Is A Chainsaw (I really have to read the sequel) and you like my writing, I think our aesthetic and narrative sensibilities should be pretty similar, so hopefully these will be books you'll also enjoy.
First on the list and most obvious is of course My Best Friend's Exorcism, by Grady Hendrix. It's perfect companion reading for My Heart Is A Chainsaw, also being about two teenage girls navigating a difficult period in their friendship, complicated by the fact that something supernatural may or may not be trying to kill them and everyone around them, and may or may not, in fact, exist. Abby and Gretchen and their friendship are so wonderfully drawn, the absurd humour only underlines the helpless horror of their situation, and the climax made me bawl like a fucking infant. 11/10 no notes.
I'd also recommend We Sold Our Souls, also by Grady Hendrix, for some of the same and some slightly different reasons. If you were drawn in by Jade's girl-alone-against-the-world situation and her punky, horror-movie-obsessed alternative vibe, you'll like Kris Pulaski and her heavy metal quest to get her life and her music back. Another one that made me cry, and it's only getting more timely and relevant with every passing year.
I really liked Nick Medina's Sisters of the Lost Nation, about an older sister looking for her younger sister after the latter disappears from their reservation after a secret rendezvous at the recently-constructed casino. Anna and Jade share a certain 'nobody else is going to fix this, so it's up to me' sensibility, the way the author pulls together ancient mythology and modern horrors is well-crafted and spooky, and there's a deeply intentional queer thread running through this one from start to finish. Warning, though, this is a deeply, deeply sad book.
In terms of meta horror about horror, Riley Sager's Final Girls surprised me with how good and gripping it was. I picked it up expecting easy-reading paperback fluff, and got sucked right in. If you crossed over Halloween: H20 with Twin Peaks, you might get something like this book. I never see anybody talking about it anywhere ever and I have to strongly recommend it. (Unfortunately, it didn't focus as closely on the relationships between the 'final girls' as I wanted it to, but I still wasn't disappointed.)
Joe Hill's N0S48U kicked my ass and made me say 'thank you'. This one's pretty tragic, so maybe give it a miss if you don't want to read about bad things happening to characters you like, but, well, this is horror. Notable because the antagonist is Christmas-themed, and honestly, I've never seen anyone else so effectively harness the crawling feeling of Wrongness that seeing Christmas shit in July gives me.
And, going wayyyy back, one of the first horror novels I actually read all the way through (on the advice of a friend), Stephen King's The Girl Who Loved Tom Gordon. If you were a My Side Of The Mountain / Hatchet kind of kid, this is the book for you. And if for some obscure reason you haven't read Carrie yet, what are you waiting for.
I also read Paul Tremblay's The Pallbearers' Club, which somehow didn't quite manage to deliver on what I was hoping for, but which you might enjoy if you liked some of the other books on this list. If you like punk music and/or characters who like punk music, meta conceits, and New England folklore, give it a shot. (I think I knew a little too much about the subject matter going in for some of the big ~surprises~ to actually surprise me.)
I've also got on my TBR list Edgar Cantero's Meddling Kids, Stephen Graham Jones' The Only Good Indians, Jessica Johns' Bad Cree, and Riley Sager's The House Across The Lake and Survive the Night. I can't speak for any of them yet, though.
(And tossing a movie onto this list, you might really enjoy Netflix's The Final Girls. It's a lot fluffier than My Heart Is A Chainsaw, but for a fun meta slasher horror-mostly-comedy, it was a solid good time. With an ambush sequence that was pretty clearly inspired by Joel Schumacher's The Lost Boys!)
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queen-of-deans-booty · 9 months
Text
I'm No Angel: Part One
Pairing: Dean Winchester x Female!Reader
Word Count: ~2.4k
Warnings: canon angst and violence
Summary: The hunt for Castiel is afoot. There are two groups looking for him: the angels and your family. Who will get to him first?
Author’s Note: I do not own anything from Supernatural. All credit goes to their respective owners. Any and all comments on these are appreciated.
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Your baby girl is growing up so fast. She's going to turn three soon, and you honestly don't know where the time went. It feels like just yesterday she was born, but so much has happened since she was.
Dean and Lisa broke things off, your dad died, the Leviathans were defeated, you went to purgatory, and now the angels are waging a civil war against each other. How much more can your shoulders take, and how much of it are you willing to carry for your daughters?
You want the world for Joanna, but it still has a long way to go to be perfect for her—for your whole family, in fact. These quiet little moments are heavenly, but you know they won't last.
Take now, for example.
You, Dean, and the girls are eating breakfast just trying to enjoy the morning before the shit hits the fan. Joanna is at that age where she will start to remember things, so you want her to have a party for her third birthday.
"Joanna, your third birthday is coming up soon. Do you want a party?" you ask and take a bite of food.
"I don't know anyone," she says innocently.
Suddenly, you don't feel so hungry anymore. Your shoulder sags slightly, and you feel the burden of being a mother at the same time as being a hunter. Sadness washes over you in waves, and you feel like a bad mother for keeping her away from other kids. She is almost three and she doesn't even have any friends.
"What do you want?" you finally ask.
"Princesses," she grins.
"I can make that happen," you chuckle. "What kind of presents do you want?"
"More dolls."
Her playroom is filled to the brim with dolls. It seems like no matter how many dolls you buy her, it's never enough.
"I'll get you whatever you want," Dean kisses her head when he passes by with coffee in hand. "You better make a big list for me."
"Okay Daddy," she giggles.
The metal front door opens, and Sam jogs in as if he's been up for hours. You look up and see him carrying some takeout containers in his hands. What time did he get up?
"Hey! Morning!" Sam greets and jogs down the stairs.
"How long have you been up?"
"For a few hours. I went for a run--beautiful sunrise--came back, took a shower, and got breakfast for you two--real bacon and eggs, extra grease. I'm not even going to argue," he chuckles and hands over the food to Dean.
"You went running?" Dean asks after smelling the food.
"Why do you look so worried?"
"Let's see. I told Cas to haul ass over here three days ago, and he's not here. Not to mention, there's you."
"Me? I feel great."
"I'm sure you do, Sam, but you went through the trials," you say. "That put a big strain on you. You should take it easy. We still don't know the full extent of the damage inside you."
Sam's demeanor changes and his eyes shine bright blue as the angel inside of him takes over.
"Sam is doing very well, and he does feel better," Ezekiel informs. "He's a work in progress, of course, but I am slowly healing him."
You're still not used to the way Ezekiel can go from himself to Sam in the blink of an eye, so it takes you and Dean some time to process what just happened.
"That's great, but Sam--"
"I have some news," the angel cuts him off. "I've picked up chatter among the angels. Not all are wandering around in confusion."
"Yeah, some of them are after Castiel."
"There is a faction that is rapidly organizing and finding human vessels to contain them. It's this faction's leadership who wants Castiel found. You see, Dean, I can be useful."
"So can my brother. Why don't you go check your email, and If I need your help, I'll let you know."
That's Dean's way of saying "sit down and shut the fuck up".
"Dean--"
"He said he'll let you know," you say with a glare.
Ezekiel knows when he isn't wanted, so he quickly slips back into Sam's mind.
"I mean, you know, Cas is human now. It's gonna take him a lot longer to travel," Sam says as if no time has passed.
Yeah, this isn't confusing at all.
"I'm going to get whiplash," Dean mutters to himself, but you hear him.
"What?"
"Nothing. Alright, so, I was thinking that if the angels are organizing, then that makes them a lot more dangerous than we thought."
"Why do you think they're organizing?" Sam asks, confused.
Dean knows he's slipped up, and you quickly cover his tracks so he doesn't give anything away.
"It makes sense, Sam," you stand. "If they organize and become a bigger group, then more of them can go after Castiel. We have to find him."
"Alright, I'll get started."
Sam grabs his laptop and leaves the room. Joanna finishes her food and runs after Sam to be with him. Maryann is in the baby rocker, sleeping since you woke her up pretty early. Without Joanna here, you lose the facade. You sigh deeply and put your head in your hands.
"What's wrong?"
"Not only do I feel like a bad mom, but this whole Sam/Ezekiel thing is going to turn on us sooner or later. He's going to keep questioning how we know things, and he'll figure it out. He'll hate us. He doesn't want this, and the longer it goes on, the more he'll hate us."
"You let me worry about that," Dean says and takes a seat next to you. "What's this about you being a bad mom? You're the best I know."
"Joanna should have friends," you sniffle. "She should be having playdates and going out to the park. She's almost three, and all she's done in her life is go on hunts with us. I wish we could have a nanny who knew about the supernatural and who could live here and take care of the kids while we're gone. That way, they'd actually get to have a normal life."
"If making sure they're fed, happy, and have a roof over their heads makes you a bad mom, then I'm a bad dad."
"Just one more year, and she can go to preschool and make friends."
"How is she going to go to school if we're hunting every day?"
"She will get an education, Dean. She will have a life outside of hunting even if it means I have to stop. I refuse to let her grow up in the way we did."
Dean knows there is no point in arguing with you, and he will cross this bridge when he comes to it. Joanna has another year until she is allowed into preschool. Well, the CDC says a child can enroll as early as three, but you're not even close to being prepared for that. You're going to wait until she is four, and then you'll start to look for schools around the Lebanon area.
Maryann wakes from her mini nap and begins crying, and even from where you're at, you can smell that she needs a change. You pick her up and soothe her while on the way to her nursery. Once you finish changing her and getting her dressed, you make sure Joanna is dressed and ready to go. After that, you get dressed, and you all meet in the library where Sam is still doing research.
"Did you find anything?" you ask and prop Maryann on your left hip.
Joanna is on the floor playing with Zeus, and she giggles when he licks her hands. Dean is sitting at the table with Sam, pouring over a map of Colorado and the surrounding states. There are radius circles drawn in intervals around the last location you knew Castiel was in: Colorado.
"Alright, so Cas called from Longmont, Colorado on Tuesday. Each circle is how far he might have gotten in one, two, and three days out," Dean says.
"The same day he called from Longmont, someone reported a weird murder in the same town. The cops said it was like the girl was blasted from the inside out."
"That's an angel kill. Let's hope they missed him," you say hopefully.
"Unless they got him," Dean sighs.
"Mama, where's Uncle Cassie?" Joanna asks.
"We're looking for him, sweetie. We'll bring him home."
"Do you have Emery Park in Iowa marked on your map?" Sam asks as he types.
"Yes. It's a couple of days outside Longmont."
"I only ask because two priests were murdered there on Thursday with eyes blown out and evidence of torture. They were impaled on posts," Sam whispers since Joanna is still here.
"They're looking for information," you sigh. "If they get to him before we do..."
"Yeah, we better go."
"Come on, baby. Let's go save Uncle Cassie," you say and grab Joanna's hand.
The first place you travel to is Emery Park in Iowa, which is about five hours from the Bunker. Castiel was in Colorado when you last heard from him, and in order to get to Emery Park, you'd have to pass Kansas. He was headed to the Bunker, realized he was being followed, and continued on to keep the Bunker's location a secret.
You have to find him quickly or else the other angels will kill him for doing what he thought was right.
Emery Park is a nice and quiet town, and if you had to guess where Castiel might have ended up, it would be at a church. Sam is with the kids in the car while you and Dean talk to the groundskeeper for St. Anne's Cathedral. You didn't even have to try hard. As soon as you described the man you're looking for, everything else fell into place.
"Yeah, I think I know this guy you're talking about. It sounds like Clarence."
"Clarence?" you ask.
"This church runs a shelter in town, and we work here to earn our keep. Clarence spent a couple of nights here before he had to move on."
"He left the day the bodies were found?"
"Yeah. Man, those poor guys were a mess. They must have suffered badly," he sighs. "At least they're with the angels."
"I sure as hell hope not," Dean mutters. "Did Clarence happen to mention where he was headed?"
"No. He just said he had to keep going."
"I appreciate you talking to us. Thank you," you smile tightly.
You and Dean leave his side and head back to the car where Sam is typing on his laptop. Joanna is playing with her dolls, and Maryann is sleeping in her car seat.
"Alright, he's definitely been here," Dean says when you two get in the car. "The good news is he's getting cagey. He's using a fake name--Clarence."
"That's what Meg used to call him. Of course, he doesn't get that that's the name of a pretty famous angel." You and Dean look at him with weird looks, and he gives you both the bitch face. "It's A Wonderful Life." Still, nothing. "Seriously?"
"What did you come up with?" you quickly change the topic.
"Another angel was killed outside a town called Lafayette which is about a day's travel east of here."
"Is that in Indiana?"
"Yeah. The body was found at a homeless camp. The weird thing about it is he was a pharmacist from Dayton. He wasn't homeless."
Lafayette is six hours from Emery Park, which makes the total amount of hours driven to find Castiel, eleven. That is half a day you've been searching for the former angel, and that doesn't include all the stops. You had to take a small break to eat and rest before continuing, and you reached Lafayette right before sundown.
Joanna and Maryann already had their naps, so they are both wide awake when you walk into the police station with the brothers. Maryann is in the stroller while Joanna walks beside it holding one of her dolls. Sam had called the police chief to let him know you'd be coming, so they jumped right into the situation at hand.
"It's the damnedest thing I've ever seen. The vic had a stab wound but it's not what killed him. It's like his insides were--I can't even find the word."
"Vaporized?" Dean asks. "It's been going around. So, this guy was a pharmacist?"
"Apparently. He was a total family man, and he was religious. One day, he just hops in the SUV, takes off, and dies under a bridge from God knows what." The police chief walks you over to the evidence locker where they have all of his belongings. He gives your children a side-eye, but he doesn't comment on why they are here. "This is his stuff. Help yourselves."
"Thank you."
He leaves, and you dig into the two plastic bags to see if anything will tell you where Castiel is. The things inside the bags are pretty standard such as a wallet, keys, a watch, a pen, etc. Sam picks up the man's miniature Bible while Dean goes through his cell phone.
"Did you find anything?" you ask and keep your kids close.
"Nothing weird. There's a ton of shitty music and a lot of video podcasts of the same person: Reverend Buddy Boyle's 'Goin' for Glory Hour'."
"The chief did say he was religious."
Dean plays one of Buddy's podcasts but keeps the volume low to not disturb anyone else. The video is of someone who looks like they dressed up as a priest instead of actually being one. His hair is too slicked back to be a real priest.
"Join me in a heapin' helpin' of glory, friends," he says with too wide of a smile on his face. "When you're in the presence of the divine, you'll know it. If you let yourself, you'll hear it." Dean skips most of the video. "So, remember, when angels come a-knocking, let 'em on in."
"Angels can't possess a human without permission, right?" Sam asks.
It's like the weight on your shoulders gets heavier because you hate lying to Sam about the angel inside of him, and you hate how you tricked him into doing it.
"Yep," Dean says curtly.
"So, what, they're using this guy to find vessels?"
"It's a willing audience. They're all religious types like our pharmacist here. Buddy Boyle was telling them to let the angels take them over. How big a reach does this Boyle guy have?"
Sam does a quick search on Google, and the first thing that pops up is "Global Influence" from Buddy's website. There are red dots in virtually every major city in the entire world.
"Pretty much the entire planet," Sam sighs.
"The only way we're going to get information about Castiel is if we ask the homeless shelters around town. We should start with the nearest one," you suggest.
You three finish up before leaving the police station with your kids.
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amphibifish · 1 month
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should I read maloki because even though it's not the best adaptation I'm kind of curious. Is it worth reading
hmm it's really dependent on how much weird ship bait fan service (i think that's the term?) and general bad plot bullshit you're willing to put up with lmao. i go on a very long rant abt everything that sucks so umm yeah. everything i say is abt the manga unless stated otherwise
i'd def skip the chapter in the first season of the manga where loki gets cursed w a rune that makes him switch personalities cause it's really weird and bad and just weird. i'm not getting into specifics cause it's weird for me to describe but just like. skip it.
another thing thats weird for u to look out for is freyr's infatuation w mayura (who's a teen girl). in the anime its not as bad cause he's explicitly a teenager (he gets enrolled in her school with the purpose of saving her mystery club) but it's never said so in the manga so it kind of just looks like a grown man doting after this teen. actually on that, most of the gods are shown in some sort of shippy way with her at least once in the manga. narugami (thor) is probably the most normal occurrence since he's explicitly a high schooler in both the anime and manga. there's a scene where heimdall (who's also like a middle schooler like loki is) kisses mayura to make loki jealous or whatever. just to piss him off.
loki also gets ship bait with a lot of the female chars too like w mayura freyja and skuld. it's. yeah you know how it is
less weird things but just kind annoying plot things that happen are loki getting out of heimdalls assignation attempts with weak explanations and also the author doing the thing where you're assumed to dislike heimdall so the sometimes the plot just shits on him for no reason (there's a chapter where loki and heim get magically transported to a magic school and he spawns in already copying lokis homework and everyone yells at him for it. bro did NOTHING !!!)
i will say that after you get past that first season of the manga it's so much better on the weird bullshit tho ! ragnarok is much better abt it and doesn't have any so bad i recall immediately and shinsekai no kamigami doesn't either. that isn't to say the plots for those aren't kinda sucky too but they're better than whatever the first season put out.
the anime gets rid of sooo much of this weird bullshit and i think does some characters better (heim and freyr get more of a proper emotional bond with each other. as sad as it is i really like what they did with hel and i personally like loki and mayura's dynamic more in the anime) but unfortunately it's majority filler so the manga has a better plot so u kinda just have to decide what you're willing to put up with fsfsfs
actually on that freyja is better written in the manga i think than the anime once again we cannot win both versions just suck. she's still kind of portrayed as loki obsessed in the manga but not to the awful degree that the anime does.
there's the occasional homophobic remarks in the manga but that's few and far between and so i choose to just ignore it.
not fault of the author but also some scanlations have really weird translators notes on some of the chapters too.
as for what's good about it. it's really heimdall and lokis conflict. it's interesting i think because of lokis feelings towards heimdall out of guilt and drives a lot in the first and third season of the manga (it's a little bit forgotten in the middle of the anime lol). i think freyr and heimdall are funny characters and i like every chapter with them in it as do i like every scene in the anime with them in it. they sort of have that odd couple dynamic and it's nice to see heimdall warm up to freyr over the course of the show and become better friends. mayura without the ship bait is also a fun character i think ! she's a mystery obsessed highschooler who loves the supernatural and so she sticks around loki who's a detective a child and an exorcist! thor is also a fun char and he's lokis best friend and mayura's classmate who has a shit ton of jobs. yamino is jormungandr and he's there but to me he's not the most interesting char. i can't say much about the plot without spoilers but it's okay and gets interesting in ragnarok. overall the characters are what makes it fun for me and thus i ignore much of canon and think about them in the vacuum chamber of my mind lol.
but yeah that's my review ig of maloki. it's Not Good but i think if you're looking for something fun ragnarok is an okay read cause the characters are silly in that one and it's not so weird and also has the best plot probably. shinsekai no kamigami is also fun and i think that plot is super interesting BUT like i said its half unscanlated. and then if you're gonna start from the very beginning i would just skip any chapter that has the weird bullshit it's probably not plot relevant anyway. the anime is more lighthearted i think and has more character bonding time but it's also a lot a lot a lot of filler. so yeah.
i'm so sorry this got so so long but i had a fun time complaining because i have a lot to complain about and i hope this helps lmao
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quickreaver · 2 years
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Happened upon a fun little naughty SPN event one day...
I’m always looking for an excuse to get iddy! And then this. “The moderators are fully supportive of kink and do not condone purity culture or censorship. However, we have enacted certain content restrictions for this bang. The following content will not be accepted for this bang: Explicit Underage Content, Incest, NSFL (necrophilia, snuff, extremely graphic nonconsensual torture). If you have any questions regarding the content restrictions, please contact a moderator.”
Hate to break it to you, mods, but what you’re doing is exactly condoning purity culture and censorship. So my question regarding the restrictions is: why even run a fandom kink event, in the Supernatural fandom in this, the year of our lord 2022, and disallow not only one of the major ships, but canoodling with unliving bodies (which likely includes just about every vessel and meatsuit an angel or demon has commandeered)? If a mod is squeamish, hey, I get it. I’ve run a ton of events and I don’t groove on everything that’s submitted. People are complicated and sometimes pretty damaged critters, and that’s a heart-breaker. Which is why we require tags for filtering, or get different mods to shepherd those fics that might be an issue for someone. There are plenty of solutions that don’t involve banning some pretty ridiculously common SPN fandom stuff. There seems to be ulterior motives at work here...  🤔 
Thank Astraea that I missed the deadline to sign up as an author, to save me from being a fly in their ointment. Sign-ups for artists are still open, but ha ha ha haaaaaa, NOPE With greater and greater frequency, new events are banning not only ships, but shippers. Not because an event is focused on a particular ship (therefore excluding others, which yeah of course) but because of some flavor of mandating what a good, virtuous fan looks like, and what they’re permitted to create. Despite all the excellent ways we’ve formulated to organize and search/filter our fandom experiences, we’ve still managed to become more judgmental and less inclusive in ways that earnestly make very little sense and don’t bode well for the future of fandom. Fandom is becoming more and more mainstream and toothless, to placate the masses. Seriously, make it make sense. Friendly reminder: if not for a Wincest shipper, there would be no AO3 right now. If not for a J2 shipper, there’d be no A/B/O. YKINMKATO is an awesome thing and paved the way for all kinds of safe, fun, experimental shit, not to mention the realization for a lot of us that we may not be as arrow straight as we thought we were. What’s current fandom so afraid of? Not being enough of an activist in their fictional adventures? CHARACTERS ARE NOT REAL HUMANS, Y’ALL. Fiction, in broad strokes, can influence the mainstream (for example: the popularity of slash fiction contributed to the realization that queer stories actually had an audience), but if fiction alone could make us better people, we wouldn’t need therapists. If it made bigger villains, more D&D players would be a serial killers. My level 16 half-orc cleric would be appalled, okay?  
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Heyyyyyyyy, how does an aspiring author, who has nothing better to do than browse ao3 get views on their fanfic? Thanks in advance for helping :)
Oki doki, so first of all, the most views I have on a fic is like... 4k something. But, i guess, here are the tips i've got.
Tag everything. I mean this. This is how most people go through ao3, and I definitely won't click on a fic that has like 4 tags. This is gonna help people stumble across your work at random. For instance, some days I'll just browse the "Hurt/Comfort" tag with a few more filters put on it to avoid the stuff I don't wanna read. So, just go to town on your tags. Especially bigger branches like "Angst" or "Hurt/Comfort" or "Found Family" or something. I usually tag a bunch of specifics too, because at least I like to know what I'm getting in to before I start reading a fic.
Good description that doesn't pull something out of the actual story. You can totally put a quote from your story as your description. That's not such a big deal. But the good description definitely is. Try and make the story set up as quickly and simply as possible. Make it open ended, so that people want to read more. Don't provide the solution to your one-shot in the description, that just makes people not want to read it. Keep things vague, if you're gonna talk about them. For instance, what I do with the little "AKA" descriptions at the end is kind of just point out reasons you'd want to read this, or what your take-aways will be at the end. I usually try to set up the main conflict without talking about the ending too much, so that the reader just wants to know where the conflict is going, and is curious to see how it ends. Of course, I'm not super great at this, either. Descriptions are REALLY. FREAKING. HARD. But they're a huge factor into whether or not someone will click on your fic.
Popular ship or fandom. This doesn't apply to me, because I write for the KOTLC fandom, mostly, and we're honestly a really small community, as far as fandoms online go. If you're writing for MHA, or the MCU, or Supernatural, or Harry Potter, or something like that, you instantly have access to a ton more readers, just because the scope of fans and readers on ao3 is just so much bigger. So, yeah. Instantly boost your view count by writing for a really popular fandom. Just be careful. The bigger the fandom, the larger the group of toxic people.
Good first line. Yeah, another hard one. But this is important too! Once you've got someone to click on your fic, you actually want them to read it. Here are my tips for good first lines.
Don't start with a character waking up. It's not a bad way to begin, but it doesn't hook the reader.
Don't start with a dream. This will throw the reader off as far as it comes to reality within your work of fiction. Plus it's really annoying. You can talk about dreams later.
Start in the middle of the action. Like, whatever set up you were thinking before the action starts? Cut that in half. Cut it in half again. Start it where the story starts, or maybe a tiny bit before that. At most. Don't be afraid to get the ball rolling immediately. It pulls the reader in with the promise of action, and keeps it going.
Make the character make some small decision very early on. If you're really stuck, make the character make a choice. Have them consider two options, or maybe more, if it's easy enough, and then have them make their choice and then do it, make them stick with it. Even if they have already made a choice and they have to keep on choosing it, this works. This will keep people reading. At least, I think it does.
and most importantly
3rd person pov
Proper grammar
And double spaced paragraphs.
These three things are so important, and everything else will get thrown out the window if a fanfic reader can't consume the fic like it's a milkshake they purchased at the nearby Chick Fil A.
Like, if I started The Princess and The Popstar like:
I wrote better lyrics when I was drunk. Well maybe not, like full on drunk but a little tipsy. I'd had about two shots of vodka, which wasnt like a lot as far as I can hold my liquor anyways but it makes everything sound better. Especially my crappy songs.
I feel like it would have been a lot less popular. Especially because on ao3, if you don't double space your paragraphs, it looks like a chunk of text and is really hard to read easily.
You can also definitely take grammatical liberties! I'm partial to run on sentences and sentence fragments in order to talk about things in specific ways! But! a lot of little errors(especially right in the beginning) is not going to make your work consumable like the ice cream cone McDonalds never makes you. Especially commas. Those things are so important. Like, I'm sure I don't know how to use them properly always, but they're really important to help the reader understand the flow of the sentence and stay with you til the end of the paragraph.
Anyways. These are my tips! Hope these helped!
Feel free to send me another ask!
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thebreakfastgenie · 1 year
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🔥🔥🔥 mash canon vs. mash fanon, if you may
okay am I supposed to give three separate opinions on this topic?
MASH canon is pretty much always better than mash fanon. I love that there is a fandom because I love participating in fandom activities, but there's a popular approach to fanon that only really works if your canon is a bit shit. Like, Supernatural and BBC Sherlock are the obvious examples, but also things like Star Wars (and arguably Star Trek with the exception of Deep Space Nine and I do tend to see a difference in how DS9 fandom operates). There's almost an arrogance to it, like "of course we can do it better." With something like Supernatural, that's true. With MASH it's not. MASH is already good and, frankly, was made by people more talented than most of us. I am including myself in this, a MASH fic writer who deeply and delusionally believes I could do The West Wing better. You know that "I'll show you 100 fic authors who can do it worse" post? Yeah.
I don't understand the fanon around BJ Hunnicutt at all, but I think the reason that character attracts so much wild rewriting by fans is that he's a comparatively weak character. Ken Levine said they struggled with writing him and tried different ways of making him stand out and I think a lot of the "layers" fans think they're picking up on are just those inconsistencies. And it's great that people love him anyway! It's not an insult to say your fave isn't super well-written, I promise. But instead of picking up what's given and smoothing out the rough edges of the writing, fanon just turns him into a completely different character who's... well, I don't find him likable, but I also just find him unsympathetic because he's kind of a caricature or stereotype. He's so wildly different to canon BJ I'm not really sure how he got there.
The "queer lens" (the way fanon uses it) makes MASH less interesting. The show is about war and specifically about a medical unit, which is a fairly different experience to being on the line, and a very interesting story. Sometimes other parts of life are more interesting than being gay. Characters can be gay without the story being about that, although canonically none of the MASH characters are and some of the headcanons are a stretch. I think the idea of the 4077th as some kind of queer safe haven totally undermines the themes of the show. There is a complicated history with gay people and the US military and you could get into that and characters' complicated feelings about it. But the idea that any of them are more free to be or find themselves really negates one of the core themes of the show, which is that the army is a constant threat to their individuality and identities. And this goes double if your lens centers on romance. MASH is a war story, not a love story. Also personally, as a gay person, I hate the "gay army doctor" show thing. There is one gay character in MASH and it's George in a single episode of season 2. Stop saying it's something it's not.
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soysaucecas · 2 years
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Chapter 1: Crystal’s Ex-Fiancee Will Be On Busty Asian Beauties
Today, Crystal & Danica discuss why Danica should(n't) be on Busty Asian Beauties. We talk about: misogyny, "Soldier, Poet, King," and "Twist and Shout."
(Inspired by The McElroy Brothers Will Be In Trolls World Tour. Not officially endorsed by @bustyasianbeautiespod.)
Full transcript under cut:
C: Hi, Crystal here. We realized a little too late that this episode doesn’t really make sense and is very unfunny without knowledge of the podcast The McElroy Brothers Will Be In Trolls World Tour, so give that a listen or a look first, I suppose. Also, this was originally going to be released on April Fool’s Day, but we decided not to because it would overshadow the BABPod Season 1 finale, so pretend that it is April 1st right now.
-
[jumbled piano music vaguely resembling the BABPod theme]
C: Hello, my name is Crystal.
D: I'm Danica.
C: And this is Crystal's Ex-Fiancee Will Be on Busty Asian Beauties, the Busty Asian Beauties fan podcast where I, one of the co-hosts of Busty Asian Beauties...
D: And I, someone who has never been on Busty Asian Beauties...
C: Discuss why my ex-fiancee should be the third co-host of the podcast.
D: Yeah. And of course, all of this is speculative fiction. I will never be on the podcast, and I don't wanna be on the podcast, but also, I will be on the podcast and these are all the reasons why.
-
C: So, Danica, tell me about your history with Supernatural and its fandom.
D: [laughs] I started watching it after you got really into it-
C: Mm-hm.
D: And I thought it would be really funny to watch the show for 7 seasons. So I've seen more of it than you have-
C: Yeah.
D: - and just not tell you, and then one day just say like, "I've seen all of Supernatural." But then I kept getting really mad at the show [C laughs] because it sucked so bad. So eventually, like, I felt like I was just making everyone else in my life hate me, so I thought like, okay, well, I have to tell Crystal now. And I got to halfway point in the show!
C: Yeah!
D: So it's perfect. It's like you've never seen it, Grey's seen all of it, and now I'm in the middle.
C: Reason number 1- Danica is a good midway point between me and Grey-
D: Exactly.
C: - in terms of watching Supernatural.
Now, how do you feel about Supernatural and the Supernatural fandom?
D: Um... poorly.
C: Yeah.
D: But if- If I was on BAB and someone gave me money on the Ko-Fi to not feel that way, I would love the Supernatural fandom so much. [C laughs] I could love Dean for $4. [C laughs more]
-
C: What are other reasons? That you just don't give a shit about Supernatural? That's a new perspective.
D: Yeah. I can just sit there, and you can all be like, you know, like, "I think Dean is, like, a total monster who's abusing his authority!" and Grey can be like, "I think Dean like, has reasons behind his actions!" and I can be like, "Who cares? Let's go watch freaking like, Bojack Horseman already!" [C laughs] Like-
C: Yeah. A podcast about -
D: Haven't you heard of Steven [in unison] Universe? Like, hello?
What qualities are people seeing in Supernatural that they're not seeing in Steven Universe?
C: Um... misogyny?
-
C: Okay, what are other reasons that Danica should be on BABPod?
D: ... Please? Is that- does that count as a reason?
C: I mean-
D: If I just said "Pretty- pretty please?"
C: Yeah, no, that's pretty good. I'll take it.
D: Yeah, okay! There's one.
Maybe we should just split it up.
C: Yeah.
D: So if there were three of us, it could be like, one person's Asian, one of us is busty, and like, one of us is the beauty-
C: [overlapping] Beautiful. Oh!
D: So it's like we all represent like, one.
C: Yeah!
D: Like "Soldier, Poet, King."
C: How would you split "Soldier, Poet, King" in Supernatural?
D: Oh, that's so easy!
C: Like Dean is obviously soldier -
D: Yeah! Literally. And then Sam is k- I would say Sam is king and Cas is- yeah.
C: Yeah! I would- I would also say that Sam is king and Cas is poet, but all the ones that I've watched have Sam as poet and Cas as king.
D: Really? Why?
C: Because-
D: Because Cas is the man who would be king?
C: Um, I think mostly it's just because they only view Sam as like, loreboy, so it's just like Sam is only associated with words and they forgot that he's literally like, the boyking of Hell.
D: That's so silly!
-
C: Well, now that the plane has passed, what were we talking about before? Oh, you've watched "Strawberry Blond" video.
D: Yes, I've watched the Destiel "Strawberry Blond" video, yes.
C: And she's read "Twist and Shout."
D: I have skimmed "Twist and Shout," [C laughs] yes.
C: So, really, Danica has learned more from social media about Supernatural than me. [D laughs]
D: I mean, I feel like my Supernatural social media, quote unquote -
C: Uh-huh.
D: - is just, like, talking to you, so...
C: God. Ouch.
D: Yeah. [laughs]
C: We're making a "Twist and Shout" podcast after this one, guys. [D laughs]
D: I will never finish, ever.
C: I am not reading "Twist and Shout."
D: Like I'm- I can't just like, say to myself that like, "I haven't done my readings for my English class, [C laughs] but let me set aside this, like, critical essay by Northrop Fry to like, consume 'Twist and Shout,'" like, honestly, you know?
C: Right.
D: For a gag. Like, not even enjoying it.
The people are gonna love-
C: They are.
D: How we just sit here talking about chapters.
C: They're titled "Chapter 1," "Chapter 2," "Chapter 3"...
D: Okay, let's just sit here and go through every single chapter silently, and then-
C: Okay.
D: Okay.
C: So, "Twist and Shout," we start with chapter 1.
D: Yes.
C: Next, we have chapter 2.
D: Good recap, yeah.
C: Chapter 3...
D: Uh-huh.
C: Chapter 4...
D: Sick.
C: Chapter 5...
D: Yeah.
C: Chapter 6?
D: Uh-huh.
C: Chapter... 7!
D: Okay!
C: Chapter 8.
D: Yeah.
C: Chapter... 9?
D: God, it keeps going!
C: Chapter 10.
D: Yeah.
C: Chapter 11-
D: Of course.
C: And ooh, you're gonna like this one. Epilogue!
D: Oh! That's like kinda a plot twist, though!
C: Yeah! It is!
D: 'Cause I really thought you were gonna say chapter 12!
C: Yeah, no!
D: So, there you go, yeah!
C: Yeah, there we go!
D: That was an emotional journey. I can see why this is the top fic on SPN AO3.
C: To be clear, we don't support "Twist and Shout."
D: Is there like a big anti-"Twist and Shout" movement, or do we just all, like, hate it and then move on, like, in our hearts?
C: I... there's not necessarily a movement, more like a general acknowledgement that it's like, very very embarrassing that someone wrote a Vietnam War fic-
D: It's very funny, yeah.
C: - where Cas also dies of AIDS. [D laughs]
[laughing] We're really off-topic. Why else should you be on -
D: [laughing] What is the topic here?
C: I don't know! Why you should be on BABPod?
D: I mean, there are no really good reasons for that, so I can see why we just went off topic.
C: I've been thinking about what it would be like if you were on the "Hammer of the Gods" episode.
[silence]
D: Oh, they- that can't be heard on the audio medium. I'm shaking my head to show that I disapprove of racism. [both laugh]
But you'll find that out. In episode 4.18 of BABPod.
C: Um, isn't "Hammer of the Gods" in season 5 or something?
D: Seriously?
C: Yeah.
D: Okay, that makes sense, I guess.
C: Yeah, 'cause Lucifer's in it, so he had to have been like, let out of the Cage.
D: Oh, god, yeah. This is something that we need to establish is that I forgot all of the Supernatural that I watched. Like, I don't remember any of it.
C: Right.
D: I watched it like, less than a year ago.
C: That's also another perspective.
-
D: Okay, we can all agree that nobody wants this to happen.
C: Yeah.
D: Like, literally none of us want me to be on the show.
C: Right, including you.
D: But... but. If this episode gets 10 million listens, [C laughs] then, you have to let me on, because it proves this is what the people need.
Let's go watching freaking Steven Universe already. Like- [laughs]
C: Yeah, let's do that. Okay.
This has been the first episode of Crystal's Ex-Fiancee Will Be on Busty Asian Beauties. And we're gonna go watch Steven Universe now.
D: This is a 10-part miniseries. Okay. [C laughs]
C: Bye guys!
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to-be-a-dreamer · 2 years
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This is me saying pls tell me what kinda fictional story I’d be in
This took me so long to write for absolutely no reason but here it is:
Eli, I think you would be a character in a YA book series that ends up getting turned into a television series. For some reason, I heavily associate you with Percy Jackson so I'm thinking of a fantasy/mythological/supernatural adventure type story with a group of young teenagers (14-15 at the beginning of the series, 17-18 at the end) who have to work together to save the world. Not 100% sure about the specifics of the plot, but I'm imagining it follows the kids, who find out about a secret world with magic and stuff and they have to go on a mission to stop something/someone from destroying the human world. Chosen One type stuff because I'm uncreative.
I think you'd be the slightly-older side character who shows up halfway through the first book to help the main characters on their mission. You would pop up fairly often in the book series, but you're super popular, so I think you would be a main character in the TV adaptation. I'm specifically imagining you being some kind of archer (gee I wonder why) or sharpshooter or something, I think that could be fun. Your original purpose was to provide exposition and make it realistic for this group of barely-trained children to be winning fights, so I think you would have been involved with whatever the main conflict is for a while. You grew up in that world and spent your whole life learning how to protect yourself and others.
You'd probably have an unnecessarily mysterious backstory in the book but the TV show would explore that more since you're a main character there. You're very much the tired parent of the group and it's kinda like "I hate all of these children but they will Actually Die if I leave them so I guess I'll stick around until they're ready to be on their own. It would be such a shame if I became emotionally attached to all of them... Oh no"
So yeah, you're probably the only mentor/authority figure that truly has their best interests at heart (I'm thinking that whoever sent them on this mission is using them for something nefarious, because why else would you send a group of random children to save the world?) And I'm so sorry but, as all mentor figures do, you would definitely get killed off in the last book/season of the series. I think the way you first met them was showing up out of nowhere to save them in a fight they weren't ready for, and that's how you would go out: saving them. Which of course sets the final arc of the story in motion and forces the main characters to fully develop their abilities and avenge you and all that good stuff. And by the end, everyone's super sad about it but it's done in a way that's super satisfying and feels right for your character. You get a full character arc and all of the loose ends of your story get tied up nicely.
Obviously, a lot of fan content made for you would be about you not dying and getting to continue to take care of the main characters. Very much "older brother" type stuff and there are a lot of fics like the early 2010s Avengers fandom era with all of you guys getting your happily ever after together. Everyone just wants your character to be happy with the main characters, the bar is so incredibly low. There are also a lot of fan edits of you (some of them nice, most of them angsty) as well as some pretty cool art.
I don't think you'd get shipped very often since you're about five years older than the characters you interact with most. You would probably have a romantic subplot somewhere in the middle of the series that some people like to write about. It's mostly just a lot of found-family dynamics, so any non-canon ships aren't talked about very much. There would probably be more fics about your backstory than any kind of romance stuff.
You're Denton, I've just made you Denton if he was younger and magic was involved. I can't believe I've done this.
Anywho, you're a pretty popular favorite character, not the most popular but if someone says you're their favorite, people would be like "yeah that's a solid choice". There might be some people who say they don't like you for whatever reason, but everyone pretty much ignores them. Very popular with the gays, I know that for sure.
I feel like all of us who have done this ask game has included "popular with the gays" as a default, but it feels pretty accurate if you ask me.
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