#and my mom was like 'why dont you eat every friday when your brother gets food' | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

book-of-ryker · 4 years

Text

When the Navy found out I smoked marijuana, I was at a firing range. I had an M-4 and an M-9, one being an automatic rifle, the other a pistol.

They disarmed me immediately, and I remember knowing why they did.

In the twenty seconds it took me to walk over to the disarming barrel, my thoughts were, “Pull the pistol out, put the barrel in your mouth and pull the trigger” for as many times I could mentally repeat before I lost the opportunity. I called my dad while a Chief was on his way to pick me up.

After the phone call, I deleted all of my Facebook messages at the recommendation of my father.

All of my text messages. too. My dad swore the Chief wasn’t my friend, and would screw me over at his first chance and not to tell him anything, at all.

The deleted threads of conversations with people who either didn’t exist anymore, or we had stopped talking.

I must have chain smoked about fifteen cigarettes in the hour and a half it took for this Chief to arrive.

All the while, I had been wishing that I had the courage to just pull that fucking trigger.

That anxiety was unbearable.

I went to a DRB, which is where I stand in front of a bunch of senior enlisted military.

At first, I came in with my shoulders back , military discipline and all. At the end, I was escorted out by a compassionate Master Chief, and I was bawling.

I have wanted to kill myself for as far back as I can remember. I smoked weed because all of my pain in life is unbearable and my mind never shuts the fuck up.

I don’t understand reality the way everyone seems to and it’s isolating, like being in the dimension next door.

"Most everyone who doesn’t know me resents me. Most everyone who knows me tolerates me," I tell myself.

I sat outside and cried, blubbering to these senior enlisted folks.

As a Second Class Petty Officer with all of the skills that I had possessed. I was in the United States Navy for five long years, and nine excruciating months and two awkward days.

I had been to mental health multiple times in my Naval career. The first psychiatrist that I ever spoke to was at NATTC Pensacola.

It’s not even six months of me getting out of the Navy now...

My present life finds me in this bed at some house in South Carolina, Like a muscle, those words stream across my mind like a teleprompter, “You should have died on that day. You should have fucking killed yourself.”

And for myself, I finally gave myself the courage to tell myself, “No.” "I love you for just who you are. I love the way you think, I love the way you handle thing[s] (most of the time ^.^), I love what you do. You have a very solid and strong mind, you think things through very thoroughly, and you have a very good outward perspective. I don't know if that helps, but that's the best I can come up with while working." Let me tell you what I think happened before I tell you why I think we should reconnect. I'm 26 years old and the one and only thing in my life that I regret, to this day, is what I once said simply to hurt you. I was an awful boyfriend for you. Not all of the time, obviously. But my only regret comes from when I said out of annoyance and irresponsibility, 'I guess you're going to have to celebrate Thanksgiving without your boyfriend or your mom.." You eyes glazed over me. You slumped over. And you sobbed. I walked towards you and hugged you because that sort of rage-to-regret is exactly the kind of Bipolar Disorder that I am used to. It's been my entire life, Nicole. It's all I have ever known. Albeit, the worst of it all is over and I'm just waiting for all of my hopes and dreams to bloom into the flowers I have been cultivating. The night we went to Twin Peaks was the night you said goodbye, even though you never did. You and I both are aware that we would come across each other someday, I think. I don't have any proof for that delusion/hope, but hey, I don't know everything which means I have unfettered access to being totally wrong and totally right, until one of us is deceased. I do remember being in absolute bliss that night we met up and you were drunk with me in the Whataburger drive through and that's about all I have for that. Mike and I moved out of the house because we wouldn't be able to renew the lease before I had to get my new job in the Navy. I moved into an apartment on the second floor and I got a dog named Itachi. I did loads of LSD that I'd gotten and I had a REALLY FUCKING AWFUL TRIP with Hailey Campbell (also tripping) and Rian Nobles (not tripping). I went to my grandmother's funeral in New York with my Dad and Alex. I found out that my photographic memory is real because I reminded my Uncle about the fit my brother went into at the LAST funeral we gathered. Which was Renee's. I lived with Lauren Teston for a long time after that. I started smoking weed because, Nicole, I didn't know what to do.. Everyone has always left me, and I only NOW understand why: me. But I didnt see it like that. It didn't feel like that.. It didn't feel like I had an emotional problem. I didn't know. But in retrospect, Nicole, my emotions felt like a chainsaw to my insides. Our breakup was the healthiest breakup for me, and it was also the worst. (2020 readers, it got way worse) I didn't leave for California until right before October 10, 2016. I was trained to be an Engine Mechanic by the Seabees and I learned a fuck ton about cars. I did more PT than anywhere else in my military career. Every Friday was a 4:30 A.M., seven mile run with the whole school. Really, it was a fourteen mile run, but it makes me sound less of a douche if I say seven, maybe. I came home on leave for Christmas and I smoked even more weed. I came back to California to finish my school. Byy the way, there were two onomatopoeia's in a barracks room together: Petty Officer Quackenbush and Petty officer Miao (this or 'mao' is also the Chinese word for cat") I left Port Hueneme after meeting Johnny Depp in L.A. I drove, for the third time, across the country. I was at Gulfport, Mississippi for a few months, learning combat procedures with the Seabees. I pissed hot in Gulfport. I wrote a poem that I'll attach later about what that was like. I went to some military proceedings, reduced in rank, lost a lot of money, had to go to two different hospitals for one month. I first went to Garden Park Hospital for a suicide watch that I had been placed under after the military proceedings had broken me down to where I couldn't take it anymore. I bawled my eyes out to men I'd never met because I could no longer believe that people didn't care about me. I was suicidal given the circumstances, but I was suicidal before I ever got caught smoking. The only reason I smoked was because I didn't want to be suicidal. A 51 year old woman tells me at this place that she, "Would be surprised if I never heard of you again. I stayed at Emerald Coast Behavioral Health (This is when I called you in 2017) and I learned an entirely different way of living. I was told that I have Bipolar Disorder I, Major Depressive Disorder, Anxiety, Osteochrondroma in the left knee. I was told a handful of tools to help myself become a better person. I then went to restriction, which is where a person is constantly monitoring me while I do nothing but work and survive. I did that for forty five days which dragged forever. I left. I stayed with my dad and I had a good first month out of the Navy. I was happy. I was excited and nervous and terrified. I smoked SO much more weed. I drank SO much more booze. And cigarettes. I was helping my dad build a deck in the backyard. My car was repossessed about one and one half months after getting out. I had nothing. I started working under the table as a contractor for a few months, but my mom and I got into a fight and I was kicked out of the house for the second and last time of my life. I moved in and slept on a friends floor. He had a bum knee from a recent surgery and so I quasi-morphed into his at-home nurse. Started doing dabs and malt liquor with friends. Eating popcorn for food, drawing outside for five hours, drinking coffee and smoking cigarettes. I did this for a month until my depression (booze) had become evil. I tried hanging myself on a dog line and I had to leave their house.. I stayed with my dude Sam for a few days and then moved in with my brother for a day. I feel nothing for him anymore, and so I really dont want to elaborate about this because he will always be a peace of shit. I went to a music festival that got shutdown by a hurricane. I got to do LSD/blow/weed for free because I was working security and I have worked with the team before. Hell, the guy in charge personally handed me $275 because of how badass of a watchstander I am. I then migrated to Asheville, North Carolina where my eyes were opened to the world we live in. And how great a thing love is, Nicole Renee Gable. But after this, I really had nowhere to go. That is until I remembered that I knew a guy from when I was in Japan.. We only ever really interacted in the smokepits. After he found out I had been sleeping on the floor of my friends house, he told me that if I was ever in South Carolina that he had a guest bedroom waiting for me. I lived with him and his wife and their son while I got a job as a forklift driver at BMW. I got another car (since been repossessed, not as debilitating for me now). I moved out and lived with a dude that I thought was a friend. He ended up being a real twat of a motherfucker. Before I knew he was a real dullard, I left BMW about two weeks of me living with him. It was too military.A HUGE millitary-industrial complex. He fucked me over so that I had nowhere to go and I didnt have a job. He left. I had the apartment by myself. It was a blur of events past that. Between the weed, the booze and the mental health issues, I am grateful to be writing this. This guy's stripper girlfriend (Her name is Sam and she's nice as well as bananas) came to find me in a fucked up mess of my own doing at the apartment. After I came to, she and I decided that I needed to check myself into a mental health center. With no insurance. I had only a few boxes of stuff (I drove down to Florida at one point to get my shit). After I was in for a week (I know what I'm about and the solutions I need), I got a job working as a cook in a strip club. The BEST job I ever had because I actually made some good money. (30 girls dancing in one night with $5 tips to me is a lot of moolah) However, I didnt make enough money to stay. I only made enough money to leave. I bought two edibles and had a nice relaxing eight hour drive to a friend's house in Pennsacola We had a personal falling out/disagreement. I worked as a line cook at Slimz at the Al Fresco in Pensacola. I saved up money to come out to California. I'm with one of my few best friends, Tymothy. Upon my arrival here, my car was repossessed (I bought in South Carolina, which is fucking crazy that they found me). My life is coming together though, Nicole. I am generally happy in my day to day lifestyle. I'm hoping to be officially retired from working for the rest of my life within this next year. It turns out that there was A HUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUGE scandal in the Navy and I'm going to use my genius mind to collect the disability that I deserve. Monthly, that payment could land anywhere between $800-2900.. For the rest of my life. I have an amazing home loan that I will get to use once the ball has begun rolling. Nicole, I really dont think I love you as much as I should have and that bothers me. Not in a negative way, at all. It makes me feel like I need to write this email to you. Like I owe you more for what you gave me, Nicole Gable. You might not see it, Nicole. The only reason I ever went along with the mental health is so that we could have a healthy relationship together. Whatever that even fucking means as far as the definition goes. Hell, for all I know, you could be seriously dead or worse. You could be dating somebody.. 😝 I havent dated anyone quite seriously. I've been on a couple of dates here and there, but I just didn't/don't care. I hope that all of these women find someone that loves them as much as I know I can love you someday, if you could ever trust me... If you're with someone, I seriously hope they love you as much as space-time can hold matter and energy and light and dark matter. The greatest lesson I have learned since we spoke last is that we will live our lives from the shades of fear and the radiations of love. I love and accept myself now. I love myself exactly how you once loved me. I don't know where on this rock you are, but if you'd like to never have to work again, please reach out to me. I would be honored, if you would ever be willing. It's still going to be a few months, so you can think about this for awhile..? If you ever wanted to live in California with me someday, I mean. Hell, we could be roomates. You could wear chastity belts and Amish outfits all year round . I don't know anything.. I hope that this email finds you well. I hope it has given you smiles. I hope you have a blessed day. [Update] It is now the year 2020. I am. The world is the world. Hell is hell. We’re all stuck on a rock in the middle of nowhere. If there’s someone reading this, be aware: you do not exist. This is my spaceship.

2 notes · View notes

heyitslapis · 6 years

Text

Ok let's see... its been about 3 weeks since i posted last, give or take a few days. And I'll just say its been an interesting and exhausting few weeks.

Still trying to completely get over my dumbf*ck feelings for Alex. I'm not really doing a super great job at that, and still get random depressive moments that last a varying amount of time, but usually i just push my pity party to the side after about 2 minutes.

On the 3rd of June, Alex went up to see part of her family and join them on a cruise to Columbia. She said wont be back until maybe the 3rd or 4th of July at the earliest. I kinda miss her, but I feel like spending a month physically apart from her will do me some good. Her and i still snap back and fourth to save our streak and to day good morning. Whenever she cant find wifi, she turns on her dad's personal hotspot so she can send me at least one snap to keep our streak rolling (we are the longest streak we have with anyone on our snapchats, and it stands currently at 261 days.) The day after she left the streak sorta died for the day, but she was able to save it cause she was in a different time zone.

Since she's been gone, we've hired several new people at work, many if which being new hosts (thank God tbh, cause this means after theyre all done training and get a couple weeks to get used to everything i can train as a server and hopefully make a little more money). One of them is Giovanni's sister (Gio is a guy that works there. Mostly does dish, sometimes hosts.) And apparently she likes me? About a week before she started they came in to eat with their mom and after they left Gio was like "Dude, i think my sister likes you."

Hey, some random girl actually has a crush on me for the first time in my life? That's cool! Right? It would be, if she weren't 17. If i were still 18 or 19, i wouldnt really care. But now that im 20, even though we only have a 2 year and almost 6 month age difference, i still feel like its weird. I feel like im in a whole new age threshold now that ive hit that 2 decade mark, and she just seems to me like a kid. Anyway, Sammy (thats her) is bi with a preference for girls. She's very forward about asking the girls at work about their sexuality (she'll be mid convo and just be like "wait; you straight?") She makes a hobby of flirting with the straight girls, because as she says it, she can easily flirt with straight girls bc she knows she wont have a chance. As soon as she knows theyre bi or gay, she cant even really talk to them. Sammy flirts with me in excess, has asked me 3 times if im straight, or if im sure that i am (homegirl has only been here like two weeks), and the reason why is because she would happily let me break her heart, and has said thats its too bad im not gay bc if i was she would let me crush her. Also has told me that i remind her of her ex girlfriend, and when i said idk if thats supposed to be a compliment or not, she said "well i really liked her, so..." Oh and btw all 3 times shes asked, I've told her im straight (yknow, bc im not out to the irl general public) and I'll just say that having to lie outloud about my sexuality does not feel that great. Thats not something ive ever had to verbally do before, and now i understand. Tbh i dont really lie, or at least i very rarely do, bc i dont like it, and i want to be seen as trustworthy. i have told my share of lies in my day, but i feel like that was in the top 3 worst lies ive ever told. Simply because i know thats not who i am, yet im saying it anyway.

Besides that, in these last couple weeks ive:

Gotten my computer hacked and almost got scamed out of the piddly $120 dollars total that is in my bank account for me to try to live off of until next Fridays paycheck, and almost got my brother's bank account hacked (looong f*ckin story. Short version, im a gotdang fool, and people are absolute bastards), so now i cant use my computer until i get it looked at, which means no art (sucks bc i wanted to draw myself a bi pride icon)

Put in 103 hours at work in the last 2 weeks

Had our only available car break down twice

Got about half of our kitchen painted. Still need to find time to finish it

Purchased tickets for a convention, and bought almost everything i need to finish my cosplay.

Have a sore in the back of my mouth thats been plaguing me for over a week (finally starting to heal. Its been hurting to do so much as talk, much less eat or drink)

Had to deal with everyone's attitudes at work (some sh*ts going on with the moon and everyones been a pissy ass lately, and im so over it)

The pain in the ass girl at work that we've been trying to get rid of for over a year called in and quit 15 minutes before her literal last shift (Father's day) and our proprietary manager told her "its bullshit that you just found out that your other job scheduled you to work today 15 minutes before you had to come here" and "dont try to come back to this store again". Im ecstatic about it tbqh and feel a small sense of victory about the whole thing.

One of my favorite gays from work had his last shift Saturday night and im still sad about it.

It may not seem like much but its just all around every other day something else small happened to add to the weird and crazy smorgasbord that is my life.

Also bless Sammy bc yesterday was Father's Day, and because of that, i was in the building of my work at 9:45am, started working to get set up at 10, opened around 10:50, and didnt stop until about 8:50pm, 10 minutes before we closed. Our proprietary manager bought us tons of pizza and snacks in the middle of our shift so that we could all take turns having a 10 minute breather, but other than that it was non-stop work and dedication to the customer. At 9:50am my brother went to the Duncan Donuts down the road from us to get the handful of morning people either coffee or bagels or whatever they asked for. I told my brother to get me the english muffin with egg and cheese, and if they had the option, to add sausage to it. Also to tell Sammy i said hi (because she works at that Duncan also, and was there yesterday morning). My brother comes back with breakfast, hands me my food and said that Sammy made it especially for me. (At that time i was also in a bad mood bc i was tired from working four open doubles in a row, and was stressed, so that really lifted my spirits a bit. The food, and the thought that someone made it especially for me.) And i'll just say she just earned my love for the next week at least.

Anyway i think thats all for now loves. I dont have a very eventful life, but i sure do have a busy one.

#my life #avatarkorvira speaks #poor sammy thinks im quote ''really cute'' and ''f*cking adorable'' and im kinda glad she thinks im straight #like her second night training with me she asked how old i was and when i said 20 she said ''damn''#then later when i asked her age (even though i alreadu knew she was 17) she refused to tell me specifically #like shed tell anyone else (including my sister) but not me #and you see at work with certain people ill be like playfully flirty with them just as one of the many ways i show friendliness #like i do it to alex and heather and marissa and molly and several others. but theyre all adults #i know for a fact sammy is a minor. so i told her im not gonna make crude or flirty jokes with her and she doesnt like that #also i just realized that i only joke flirt with girls at work #mostly thats just because im more comfortable with the gals. that and every guy there is either annoying or nasty #and i wouldnt be able to interact with them that way without them making it really gross or thinking im actually hitting on them #and if i ever truely hitting on any of the guys at work someone smack me in the back of the head bc ew #alex #sammy

4 notes · View notes

unavenged-robin · 7 years

Text

(something for your way to work? Have a good day!)

So I kinda want Jons first date to be with someone who ISNT Damian. Like he has the biggest crush on Damian in the world, but he thinks its not reciprocated (cause you know damian and feelings). So this cute boy from his high school asks Jon out and Jon agrees. Jon tells Damian and Damian is just SO JEALOUS. Just grinding his teeth to dust jealous. But he can’t complain, or do anything about it. Some other guy just had the guts to tell Jon, “Hey, you’re cute. Wanna get dinner and watch a movie with me?” While Damian can barely manage a nice thing to say to Jon. (even though the thought of Jon laughing or smiling at a dumb joke keeps him up all night). So what does he do? He tells Jon to enjoy his date and that he’ll see him on patrol the night after his date; calling himself a coward the whole time he writes out the message and sends it.

The next day is just a moping Damian. After training and a shower, its just moping all around the manor. Eating breakfast? Full of sighs. In the library? Titus is sitting in his lap and hes curled around his dog, looking out of the window. Listening to music? Sad songs.

“Damian?” Dick asked, carefully removing one of Damians earbuds. Damian grunted. “Everything okay, bud?”

“Peachy, why do you ask?”

“You seem…off.” Dick said careful of his words.

“’M fine.” Damian grumbled, taking his earbud back.

Tim comes strolling in with some tea for Damian, and ruffles his hair. “Jon’s going on a date because poor Damian here can’t sort out his feelings like the rest of us.“

“How do you know?” Dick asked

“Kon told me.” Tim answered, typing something on his phone. “I told him that i’m gonna sabotage his little brothers date.”

Dick perked up and was about to open his mouth until he heard a gun getting loaded. “WE’RE NOT GONNA KILL HIM, JASON.”

“Damnit.”

Stephanie comes skipping in with some pictures, “his name is Clay. What an unattractive name, CLAY. Like Ew. Put a face after that and you have a villain name. ANYWAYS. Cute kid. Gray eyes, blonde hair. He’s on the basketball team. So if Mad Dog Jason gets out, make sure he doesnt break his wrist.” Stephanie relays all of this information while stroking Damians hair. Damian would normally hiss and growl and promise her demise, but today he just lets his head rest on her hip. (Damian ofc cant hear anything. He just thinks his siblings + steph are just keeping him company)

“Fuck you, Steph.”

“Don’t you wish, honey.”

So it’s friday night. Jon and Clay are at a diner. (Damian is patrolling with batman. B notices that Robin is a little more aggressive tonight than normal)

Jay steals Clays wallet making Jon pay for everything.Jon doesnt mind. Hes just a little annoyed cause Clay said it was his treat.

Since Jay still has Clays wallet, Jon also has to pay for the movie tickets.

Anytime the other boy wants to touch Jon, hand over shoulder holding his hand Dick shocks him.

Jon is miserable. This was a shit date. Why did he even come? Even during dinner he realized they had nothing in common besides sports, and the fact they’re in AP Calculus. And they’re not even on the same sports team! (Jons in baseball) Every conversation he had with him was an absolute bore, He seemed so charming in school! Jon sighed as they finally pulled into the driveway to his house in metropolis.

“Sorry about tonight! I guess, I just wasn’t on my game.” Clay laughs. Jon tried not to cringe at yet another sports reference.

“We all have our off days.” Jon smiles, ready to put this dumb date behind him.

Clay holds his hand, and Jon finds himself desperately wishing that it was someone else holding his hand. Someone hes trying to get over. Someone whos too tied down to crime fighting. Someone whos passionate about animals and art and literature and his city.

“Thanks for being so understanding.” Clay says leaning forward. Jon found himself leaning forward too. The hell with it, maybe at least the kissing will make up for this lousy excuse of a date.

Tim hacks the boys car before his and Jons lips touched, making the car alarm go off in the dead of night. The batboys tried not to snicker, that would tip off a certain someones super hearing.

Jon grits his teeth and get out of the car. “Thanks for the ride.” He calls over his shoulder and retreats into his house.

Jon sees his mom waiting up for him in the living room. “Hey, honey.” Jon super speed runs to her and plops himself on her lap.

“Im taking your date went bad?”

“Oh you have no idea.” he mumbled into her lap, holding her closer.

“Think of it this way, this just sets the bar for all of your other dates!” Lois said, carding her fingers through her sons thick black hair.

“Mom, anything lower than this would be my date not showing up. And honestly, that’s still probably better than tonight."

Lois had to laugh at that.

"I dated the captain of the basketball team when I was your age too.”

“Howd it go?”

“God awful. He ran off with god knows who in the middle of our date. I had to walk home myself.”

“What happened after that?”

“I started dating your father.”

“Think he asked batman to scare the other guy off?”

Lois laughed at that. “Somehow, I dont doubt it."

Lois pressed a kiss to Jons cheek and went off to bed. He could hear his Dads thunderous snores as she opened the door to their bedroom.

Jon pulled out his phone and sent a quick text to Damian.

Worst date ever, and it was my first one. Tell you about it on patrol tomorrow. Night!

Damian opened the message as he waited for the GCPD to pick up the would be bank robbers he just busted. A big smile spread across his cheeks. Looks like Damian will get his second chance soon.

BONUS: when Batman and robin strolled into the cave, Tim, Jason, and Dick were all napping in random spots with their suits on.

"They didn’t tell me they went on patrol.” Batman frowned. The pieces clicked into place for Damian rather quickly. He had to hide a smile from his father. He also made a mental note of finding out ways to thank his brothers.

@desolationofzara OMG I LOVE THIS SO MUCH! And i legit laughed out loud, thank you so much darling!

#damijon #these boys are killing me #desolationofzara #submission #damian wayne #dick grayson #tim drake #jason todd #jon kent #supersons

1K notes · View notes

lesbianstarlightglimmer · 6 years

Text

hey hi guess who wants to die?

my asshole of a father is wearing me thin. i came home at dinner and we always talk about how school went that day and i had my day interrupted countless times by either 1.) my mom getting upset my youngest brother for messing w the cat at the dinner table 2.) my dad yelling at him for same reason 3.) one or both of my brothers ‘jokingly’ complaining about how long me talking about my day is and so on. my youngest brother decided the entire meal he was just gonna ignore what he was told to do and thus got his phone taken away.

all the yelling and fighting made my other brother stressed so he took a drive through the neighborhood. before we got ready for bed my dad asked him why he was feeling stressed and he said the fighting was stressing him and i chipped in (because it happens every fucking time im home) saying it stressed me out too and how its chaos every time i come home.

my dad informed all three of us we had no reason to be stressed bc we’re not parents and how its ‘optional’ i come home on weekends bc i COULD be forced to pay rent AND THEN he said that the ‘so called chaos you feel when you get home is caused by you’

fuck. you. you worthless abusive piece of shit. ive wanted to die like 7 times this week alone and fridays not even over and this bullshit aint helping. im not the one shrieking at the youngest brother every other second bc hes doing whatever bc he never went through the bullshit i did that made me the timid soldier fucked up ass i am today

you know what? i dont come home for my fucked up family. i come home to get away from school, eat food thats different from the same 5 fucking things they have to eat there that doesnt make me sick, and to see my cats. i cant spend more than maybe 30 mins before i wall myself up in my room until i leave because they stress me out so badly

AND THEN THIS ABSOLUTE BASTARD had the nerve to say how i never thank my mom for doing laundry/cooking/cleaning/etc. OH HO DO NOT GO THERE! whos the one complaining about how the foods not the right temperature or that its not what he wanted to eat or wasnt at the time he wanted? whos the one who gets mad when she gets home from work bc something didnt get done that HE could have done?

Now whos the one who went 18 years of her entire life not complaining about how much the taste and texture of sausage makes her gag because she was being grateful her mom cooks? You wonder why i only tell my day to mom? its bc u dont give a fuck. i can hear it in the disinterest or how it becomes a life lesson. i say thank you like 4 times throughout a meal and every load she brings in (oh and btw most of the time im doing my own laundry and i would do it at school except i dont have the soap and stuff) i say thank you. they beat it enough into me and yet im still punished because NOTHING i do is enough for them. but yes I’m the selfish prick

and then they had to bring in how im always alone (wow idk my 2 friends from hs were dead ps im not counting skye bc they dont know about her/tumblr for my safety and hers and my hs friends’) and he used the fucking b*st fr**nd bullshit fuck you fuck you fuck you. and then the ‘i want you to get married and have kids’ FUCK YOU!!!!! you wont want me to if i decide to marry a woman!!!!! i dont wanna have kids bc ill fuck them up like YOU DID ME AND MY BROTHERS.

and then he guilt tripped us by saying how ‘we work our jobs bc we’re paying for what? (directed at me).’ “college” i hiss. “dont you spit it through your clenched jaw” Youre fucking lucky you were on the other side of the room motherfucker ooooooooohmygod. Ohoho and when he ‘opened the floor’ once he was done telling us how shitty we are and how hardworking him and my mom are, he asked if i had anything to say. i wanted to spill all of the above but i cant. i dont have a job bc i can barely get out of bed in the morning for school let alone more of a job than i have now

you know at one point i was grateful for them helping pay for college. now its just a burden bc they hang it over my head whenever i show the slightest (and fair) complaint i have like how i come home and everyone just complains about me, makes me do their jobs for them, the youngest hits me (but oh no thats how boys show love right ‘hE sItS iN uR rOoM wHeN yOuRe GoNe’) or otherwise physically or verbally/mentally abuses me.

i need therapy. i have no time no money and my parents obviously dont give a shit about my mental health period. he even had the audacity to ask if it was ‘something they did’ parenting wise. uh you want the list in fucking alphabetical order or by year or...?

anyways this is long and its passed midnight and they placed a baby monitor outside my door to hear one brother for night terrors so ik they can maybe hear me typing so yeah

#don////t re///blog//////#im not actually gonna do anything dont worry too much #im not exaggerating when i say that when fireball and cinder are gone im not coming back #if i could bring them w me id definitly never come bavk #i literally was about to vomit on the carpet bc he was making me sob and god i wanted to punch ihm in his weasel face #im still crying an hour later lmao #im high key tempted to get some tide or something and keep it up at school and not come back next weekend #i dont have to take this lmao #luckily he has work all this weekend bc i cant stand to look at him rn #growls

3 notes · View notes

katrinawritesthings · 7 years

Text

Taemin-Centric; Fry Guy; PG

just like... high school au where the kid always has fries

where does he get them

how does he hide them from his teachers

will he give u one??? maybe

ao3

Monday Taemin brings a sleeve-covered hand up to muffle his yawn into, and then kind of just leaves his sleeve over half of his face. The morning air is so cold and his sleeve is so warm. He’ll go through the whole day like this. One hand over his mouth. He doesn’t give a shit.

He shuffles up to the low wall that separates the gas station from the corner of the sidewalk and sits, blearily watching cars drive passed to the school down the block. The usual few kids are walking their sleepy butts down the street and Taemin sighs because he’s going to be joining them soon as soon as Jinki meets back up with him. He glances around the parking lot of the shopping center behind him with a grimace. As soon as Jinki decides to show the fuck up, more like. Sticking his hand into his hoodie pocket, he first pulls out a fry, lovely and crispy and warm, and pops it into his mouth. Then he pulls out his phone and opens up a game to pass the time while he waits.

Eventually, there’s a tap on his shoulder and he looks up to see his big bro standing there with his morning coffee. Finally.

“Sip?” he asks, standing up and leaning on Jinki’s shoulder.

“Mmhmm,” Jinki replies, handing over his warm cup. Taemin takes it as Jinki reaches out and presses the crosswalk button to the school side of the street. There’s too much milk, as usual, but Taemin takes his free sips of coffee where he can get them. He takes three little swallows and then hands it back to Jinki with a tired smack of his lips. “Fry?” Jinki asks as he holds his cup in both hands.

“Mmhmm,” Taemin hums, pulling one from his hoodie and handing it over. Jinki reaches for it, but then hesitates with a little frown.

“Is that a Burger King fry?” he asks, pointing at it. Taemin nods, wiggling it at Jinki. Thick and crisp and fluffy on the inside. A little bland, but still good. A wholesome fry. Jinki scrunches his nose, though, and returns his hand back to his coffee. “Ew,” he mumbles. Taemin scoffs, offended down to his very core.

“I’m sorry?” he says, curling the fry to his chest protectively. “Do I know you?” he asks. No brother of his would say something so disgusting.

“Oh my god,” Jinki says, rolling his eyes. “Don’t be so dramatic.” Taemin shakes his head in disbelief. Out of the corner of his eye, he notices that the crosswalk is open so he starts walking without reply, stuffing his lovely fry into his own mouth. Jinki steps a little quickly to catch up to him and nudges his shoulder. “I’m still driving you and your friends to the mall this weekend, right?” he asks.

“Sorry?” Taemin says again, frowning at him with confusion. “I don’t talk to strangers,” he says, and pulls his hood up.

“Taemin,” Jinki says flatly, but Taemin just hops up onto the curb and walks purposefully down the sidewalk to the school without looking back.

Tuesday Taemin props his chin up on his bag, hugging it close while he waits for the rest of third period biology to fill in. They’re supposed to take notes today and he doesn’t know how he’s going to get his notebook from his bag when he’s using it as a pillow, but he’ll cross that bridge when he gets there. Maybe they’ll watch a movie and he’ll just get a worksheet to fill out instead. That would be nice.

With a glance at the teacher, he slips his hand into his hoodie pocket and pulls out a fry. McDonald’s today; a classic, long and crisp and extra salty. A blessing. He loves that the good Mcdonald’s is by the school instead of that garbage one with the soft, mushy fries by the movies. As he chews slowly and reaches in for another, a head of black hair with red streaked bangs comes through the door. Oh. There they are.

Key drops their bag on their desk next to him and then sits in it with a little hum like they always do. Taemin watches tiredly as they pull out their notes and pencil box, and then raises his eyebrow when they turn expectantly to him.

“Hey,” they say, barely waving for a second before holding their hand out, palm up. “Let me get a fry,” they say. Taemin snorts, looking away.

“Get a better attitude first,” he mumbles. Immediately Key gasps and huffs and acts all indignant, but Taemin doesn’t really care. He hates when people demand shit from him and Key knows that. He blandly ignores Key’s whines and insistences until class starts, and only tries to keep his smirk down a little bit when he eats another fry right in front of their eyes.

At some point Key gets up to throw something away and Taemin leans over and places three whole fries on top of their notebook. When they get back they take one look at them and huff, throwing Taemin an annoyed little glare.

They also eat the fries.

Wednesday Minho only just barely makes it through the door of sixth period world history before the bell rings. Taemin breathes out a slow, relieved, impressed breath. That was close. Closer than usual. Before Minho has even collapsed into the desk in front of him, Taemin is holding his whole container of fries out. There’s only about a fourth of a large left this time, but they’re Carl’s Jr fries. Thick fries. Seasoned fries. Skin still on. Hearty fries.

“Thanks,” Minho breathes, taking them and pulling two out at once. Taemin nods with a little shrug. He always saves his mid week fries for Minho. It’s Wonderful Wednesday in the gym classes, which means that Minho just ran all period long and then had to hightail it all the way across the school and up the stairs to make it in time for this class.

He’s never even asked for any fries, to be honest. Not once. Taemin just gives him whatever leftovers he has every Wednesday. Taemin has never known a human to be more deserving of fries than Minho. He’s a good egg.

The teacher starts them off by going over the homework from last night; Taemin listens tiredly and checks his answers while Minho slowly makes his way through his fries. When he gets up to turn it in, Minho holds out his paper with a pleading little smile and Taemin smiles back, nodding easily as he takes it. He doesn’t know why he has such a soft spot for his tall classmate. It’s probably the big eyes and the ease with which he shares his notes.

He sits back down and tugs his textbook close to turn to the new chapter, rubbing his palms into his eyes before getting into a comfortable learning slouch. Forty-something minutes to go until he’s free but until then, he feels like he can learn some things.

As he’s tapping his pencil over his bottom lip and trying not to zone out of the powerpoint, Minho taps softly on his desk. Taemin glances at the teacher, then at him, and blinks when Minho hands him back his container of fries. Oh. Nice. He’s saved Taemin all of the thin, little, crispy ones. What a good and pure human.

Thursday From: Jinki 4:53pm taemin i swear to fucking god do not make me tell mom that youre ignoring me because i dont like bk fries

Taemin glances at the text that pops up in the corner of his phone and snorts. He swipes it away without opening the app and technically looking at it, slipping his phone back into his pocket. He doesn’t even care about the fries anymore; now he’s just ignoring Jinki because it’s amusing.

His phone vibrates more, probably with texts from his friends telling him to hurry up because the trailers are starting. He ignores them as well but continues his walking through the movie theatre a little faster. He knows that he’s late. He had important fry business to take care of first. As he approaches the right ticket checker he smiles, recognizing him easily.

“Hey, Jong,” he says, holding out his ticket. He loves running into his computer class buddy here. He’s always so cute, all snazzed up in his uniform and everything.

“Hey,” Jonghyun says back, smiling a smile that’s part customer service and part genuine. He takes his ticket and rips it with a quick glance. “You’re number seven, the third on your right,” he says as he hands it back.

“Mmhmm,” Taemin hums, stuffing it into his pocket. “Thank--”

“Hey, wait,” Jonghyun says quickly. He holds a hand out in front of Taemin’s chest, and when Taemin turns to him with a confused look, he’s glancing around the rest of the lobby. He looks Taemin up and down and cocks a brow. “What kind of fries you got?” he asks lowly. He glances at Taemin’s hoodie pocket meaningfully as well and Taemin frowns.

“Jonghyun,” he says, voice carrying a whine. He doesn’t wanna give up his fries. They’re Five Guys fries. Gorgeous. Salty. Deep. Flavorful. Fried to perfection. Expensive.

“Taemin,” Jonghyun hisses back. “It’s against the rules to bring your own food in,” he says, nodding around the rest of the movie theatre. “I could get in trouble by letting you. What fries are you bribing me with?”

“Oh my god,” Taemin huffs. He shoves his hand into his pocket and pulls out four wonderful, perfect, lovely fries. “Here,” he mutters, pushing them into Jonghyun’s eager hands.

“Oh my god, are these Five Guys?” Jonghyun asks. “Fucking bless. Enjoy your movie.” He’s smiling wide as he pops one into his mouth and Taemin grumbles, shuffling passed him and into the theatre.

Friday Taemin bites his lips as he watches his hash browns frying in the pan. This is just. So good. So nice. He has no idea why today is a Friday off but he doesn’t mind in the slightest, not when he’s cooking himself up a late breakfast right now instead of falling asleep in second period algebra. He should probably pay more attention to holidays and whatnot so he could be more prepared, but whatever.

He gets on his tiptoes to pull down the bottles of seasoning salt from the cabinet over the stove, uncapping one and sprinkling it over his potatoes. With the second bottle, more comes out that he was expecting and he pauses, frowning at the very obvious dusting of salt in the pan. Hmm. Whoops. And the salt from the bacon fat he’s frying this up in will be added to that as well. Shit.

Taemin stares at his mistake for another few moments before he shrugs and shuffles back to the freezer. He’ll just add more shredded potatoes. No big deal. He takes the bag out, pulls off the rubber band, and pours some more out on top of the ones already in pan. Sure, he’s not supposed to have too much in a pan at once, but whatever. He’s in charge of his own destiny. No little instructions box on the back of a freezer bag of potatoes is going to tell him how to live his life. He kind of likes when these potatoes aren’t as crispy anyway.

When he puts the bag back into the freezer he also glances at the clock on the wall. Hmm. It’s been about ten minutes so far. He’d be the few blocks down the street and at the shopping center by now. Maybe it would have been faster to just walk down there and buy some breakfast fries for himself. Maybe some of those crispy Jack in the Box ones.

It wouldn’t be as warm and cozy and relaxing, though, Taemin tells himself, and he shrugs as he moves back to stand over the stove again. It would also be largely more expensive than free, which is what these hash browns are. And he wouldn’t have bacon or a blankie to go with them. Yeah. He smiles softly as he pokes his potatoes around the pan. This was definitely a better idea.

18 notes · View notes

ninarequests · 7 years

Text

Addiction

Hey guys so this is part 1! I promise ill update more. I’m leaving for Korea in the morning so bare with me. Thanks so much for the support but once i come back i’ll update again

Pairing:Kihyun/Reader

Genre: Slight angst, Dom!Kihyun Sub!Kihyun, Smut (a good amount of it), romance.

Kihyun laid on his bed thinking about what had just happened in his kitchen. This always happened to him, everytime you would come over or when he was at your apartment it always ended with him having the most amazing sex with you. He would lay in his bed and think about you, about how your hands felt as they left scratch marks on his back or how they felt wrapped around his throbbing cock. To say he loved it was an understatment to say the least. He was despreate for your touch but he was also desperate for your presence. Kihyun thought about how you both met and couldn't help but smile.

-10 years ago-

“y/n! Come say hello to my friends.” Rolling your eyes you rolled off the bed. You hated when your mom made you go and say hello to her friends. They always said the same thing “Aw your so cute!” “You look just like your mother.” Or your favorite “You must have all the boys in your class head over heels for you.” It was annoying and a little off putting. You really could care less about the boys in your class or even in your school. They were all gross to you.

Walking downstairs you saw your mom talking to a woman that looked around her age. “Oh y/n, good you're here this is my old roommate from college.” You looked at her friend and smiled, she smiled back at you and shook your hand.

“It's nice to meet you.” she pulled her hand back and looked back at your mother. “Glad she didn't get your looks that would have been a shame.” You couldn't help but chuckle when she said that. Your mom had a shocked expression on her face.

“Wow I see your sarcasim hasn't changed.” You liked this woman she wasn't like your moms other friends.

“Mom the movers want you to sign the papers.” You heard someone say from the door. Peeking around your moms friend you saw a boy who was a little on the short side standing at the door. He was cute sort of that typical boy next door kind of cute. He wore a plain black t-shirt and some jeans that had paint all over them with black and white chucks on. 'Yup typical boy next door look.' you thought to yourself.

“Okay I'll be there in a second. This is my son Kihyun, Kihyun come say hello.” Stepping in the house Kihyun walked up to you and your mom.

“Hello.” He greeted with a wave.

“This is y/n, she goes to the same school your going to be going to.” His mom said and you just nodded. He smiled at you and you were surprised at how nice his smile was.

“I can show you around on monday if you would like.”

“I'd like that.” he said then both him and his mother left your house to go finish doing what they had to do.

“He's cute right?” Your mom nudged your arm.

“Don't get any ideas mom.” You said as you walked away from her and back into your room.

You found out on monday that you were a year older than him so you didn't have any classes with him but that was alright with you. He had made friends immidetly, so the walk to school and back was really the only time you hung out with him. The years passed by and you and Kihyun became close like brother and sister. You never saw him in that light and he never saw you as anything other then your sister.

Before you knew it you were a senior and it was graduation day. Your parents threw you a graduation party inviting everyone. Your friends were there having a good time and so were you but you just weren't that into it. You noticed Kihyun walking up to where you were hiding yourself from the rest of the party.

“Is cinderella running out of her own party?” He asked leaning against the chair infront of you. He looked amazing that night, a pair of nice dress pants and a pale blue button up that fit his lean frame.

“Haha you're so funny Kiki.” you smiled at the nickname you gave him, he on the other hand didn't really care for it.

“So what's eating you? Why are we keeping ourselves hidden in the corner of your own party?” He sat down in the chair opposite of you. As sharp as his mouth is he still was one of the most caring people you ever met.

Sighing you leaned your back on the chair letting your hrad fall back, “I don't know like this is just weird for me.” Lifting your head so you could look at him. “You know I don't do well with change Kihyun.”

“Is that what you're worried about?” He scooted closer to you and grabbed your hands. “Nothing will change. In a year I'll come meet up with you at the same college and save you from that sad life you will live okay?”

That made you smile, he always made you smile. You were going to miss your best friend. “I know but I dont know it just feels weird you know?” He could still sense your uncertency about everything and made you stand up.

“Don't think about and come dance with us okay?” He pulled you to the dance floor where you greeted by friends and family alike.

Soon the summer passed and it was time for you to go move into the dorms at your out of state college. Putting the last box in the truck you looked back at your house and shoved your hands in the pockted of the jeans you were wearing.

“It's gonna be weird not walking to school with you any more.” You heard a voice say behind you, Looking over your shoulder you saw Kihyun standing there holding a small present. “Here a little going away gift for you.” He handed you the small wrapped box. Looking at him then looking at the box you slowly opened it and say it was a necklace with a small crystal attached to it.

“It's a healing crystal, I know you like that kind of stuff.” he smiled when he saw your eyes widen.

“Kihyun, thank you so much I love it!” Pulling him into a hug. You felt his arms wrap around you giving a litte squeeze. He buried his face in your shoulder and whispered something into that you held onto for a long time.

“I'll miss you.”

“I'll miss you too.”

Those were the last words you both said to each other in person. You went off to college, at first you texted each other every day. But slowly the texts went from every day to a few times a week to once a week, then to once a month then only on your birthdays then nothing at all. Life had caught up with you and it did the same for him. He never went to the same college as you and you were busy with classes and papers you forgot about it too.

At 22 you graduated with a degree in history and were working on getting your teaching liscence. You always wanted to teach high school students and history was a passion of yours. And three years later here you were teaching a class all your own. You loved every minute of it, and your kids loved you too.

“Hey y/n!” Looking up from your desk you saw your friend Gina at the doorway of your classroom.

“Hey Gi what's up?” Looking at her you put the papers you were marking away giving Gina your attention.

“It's friday and I wanted to know if you were up to go to this party with me?” She asked as she sat herself in one of the student's desks'. You loved Gina she was the best friend anyone could ask for, but she was a party animal. She still kept in touch with people on her old schools campus and knew when the frat's were having parties.

“Sure I havent been out in a while.”

“Oh good. I'll pick you at 9 okay.” getting up to leave you just nodded your head and told her to text you when she was outside.

Before you knew it, you were walking up the stairs to a frat house. People were haning put on the porch, the party seemed to have spilt out of the house.

“This is a pretty big party Gina.” You said as you followed her through the crowd of people.

“Well this is there biggest party of the year. Plus finals just finished this week.” She shrugged pulling you to the kitchen. “You never partied in college?” She pulled one of those red solo cups from the pile and poured you a drink.

“I did when I was dating this one asshole but not since then.” Taking a sip of your drink you looked around the crowd of people. Some were playing beer pong, dancing or just talking to friends.

“Oh that guy. I remember you telling me about him.” shacking her head she too took a sip of her drink as well. Just the thought of your ex made you want to throw up. He was a class A assshole. He liked to show you off to his friends as if you were a trophy. At fisrt it was cute but then it became a little bit too much for you. His ideal of a woman was she needs to be dumb, serve him like he is a king and speak only when spoken too. After that you told yourself you were done with the men. Being alone was fine with, you still had your ocassional one night stands cause at the end of the day you still had neededs. You were fine with being friends with benefits, but they always wanted more.

“Gina!” Looking you saw a guy push past people and grab Gina in a hug.

“Oh my goodness! Changkyun!!” She looked at you with a smile from ear to ear. “y/n! This is Changkyun, he was my best friend when we went to school.”

“Hello Changkyun I'm y/n.” You shook his hand.

“Nice to meet you.” He smiled showing off his dimples. 'He's cute.' You thought as you pulled your hand away.

“Come me and my friends are in the back.”

You and gina followed him through the house and out the backdoor. “Guys this is Gina the one I told you about and her friend y/n” Before you could even say hello someone interrupted you.

“Y/N?!”

#Kihyun #kihyun smut #Monsta x #wonho #changkyun #hyungwon #minhyuk #shownu #jooheon #mx #kihyun scenarios

95 notes · View notes

aliensnthoughts · 5 years

Text

Alone.

I came home this weekend. But maybe it wasn’t such a good idea. Although I have the company of my mom and her husband, I’m feeling more alone than ever. I feel this weird pain inside of me as I realize how truly alone I am. And without thinking about it, I think its one of my greatest fears. I’m fine wih being alone but I know how truly painful and terrifying it is. I feel like no one actually cares about me. And I know I should reach out to people but I feel like I have no motivation to. I spend most of my days just thinking about school, doing homework, and crying.

I was looking forward to coming home this weekend. I guess I was feeling a little homesick. My mom picked me up from the train station thursday night. Thursday was fine because we all talked. Friday was okay because my mom and her husband worked mostly all day and I stayed in my room doing homework. Today, Saturday, is when I really felt it. My mom and I went grocery shopping for maybe 2 hours while her husband was at work. Mom said we can watch a movie while dinner is cooking. Her husband came home and I was doing some homework. They were going to eat lunch and I wasnt hungry so I went to my room because I knew they wanted to watch their own show while eating. But I ended up staying here the whole day. Throughout the day my mom and her husband watched their show. My mom was like we can watch the movie in a bit. Then nothing...then she kept calling my name from the living room but...i dont know I didn’t want to come out. Why am I always the one who has to seek out to people? Does no one really care enough about me to put effort into doing something with me? And everytime I try to start talking or making plans with someone else I end up feeling like a burden. Most of my life I struggled with myself and the position I have with others. Ever since my mom brought her husband into our lives i ALWAYS thought she cared more about him. Ever since she brought him into our lives, she NEVER valued my thoughts or opinions. She heard them. But she didn’t do anything. It’s as if I was talking to a brick wall. She knew I was in pain but it’s like she wanted me to get over it. And thats why I stopped telling her how I feel. Because it didn’t fucking matter how I felt. Everything I thought or felt was invalid to her. Things were gonna go her way and i had to fucking suck it up. Lets just throw my emotions out of the way because its so easy to do. I came home this weekend thinking that i’ll be able to spend time with my mom more especially since I don’t see her often anymore after I moved out. I’ts completely the same as if I never even left. She spent the whole fucking day with her husband again. Watching their show. Something they can do any other day. Meanwhile I’m here, someone you rarely see now, and it’s like it doesn’t matter to her? This may not be something I’ll ever be able to grasp. And it’s not like I’m saying she has to pick me or her husband. But why can’t you put more attention to me? Just a little bit? It breaks my heart a bit. You see and talk to your husband every single day. You give him all your attention...but what about me?

One thing I’ve noticed lately. Everyone I know has someone. Whether it be siblings living with them, a partner, or friends they see and talk to everyday. I have absolutely no one. My mom has her husband. My dad and brother are both in texas with their girlfriends. ALL my friends have siblings with them or at least at least a significant other. I dont have anoyone. And I know i cant count on them but god do I feel so fucking annoying if I keep talking to them.

I dont know what to do anymore. This feeling is no stranger to me. Not once have I ever told anyone about my recurring depression. And I know its here. It’s taking me over now. I know I would never kill myself because I’m to scared to. It’s ironic in a way, I’m not afraid to die but I’m terrified to kill myself. It’s not something I will ever do. I do value life, just wondering what the point of mine is. God, I’m feeling so fucking lonely. And theres absolutely no one I can talk to about this. I’ve talked to a therapist twice in my life but I hated. I hated the whole setting. And I wish i can just scream out to the whole world that I feel so dark inside. But I cant. I’m so desperate to talk to someone though. Someone who genuinely can and wants to listen to me. Because they care not because they have to. I know that won’t happen though. So time to suck it up, like i have been the past few years, and go on with my day. Brush my feelings away until I’m alone again where uncover who I really am.

#lifenstuff

0 notes

yourrainycollectorhologram-blog · 6 years

Text

Is it normal for a dealer to ask me to put car on my insurance before i purchase it?

"Is it normal for a dealer to ask me to put car on my insurance before i purchase it?

I am trying to finance a car... the dealer said i can take it home today before I get approved for credit, I just have to put the car on my insurance. I have never heard of that. Is this some type of scam thing? Like what if the interest rate is outrageously high... am I stuck with the car or something? I live in Texas

BEST ANSWER: Try this site where you can compare quotes: : http://insureinfo.xyz/index.html?src=tumblr

RELATED QUESTIONS:

""If I start working, will my insurance get taken away?""

I'm currently a junior in high school and recently got hired for a opening job position. I receive free health care and my mom is unemployed and is receiving disability benefits. If I take this job, will my health care and my mom's benefits get taken away? Will it affect me or just my mom or both of us? My parents said that if I make money, it will have to be included in the family income and if we exceed a certain amount, then all of our benefits will be taken away. Does anyone have any insight on this? I'm not sure how many hours I will be assigned to work if i take this job, but it is minimum wage and they do limit high school students to work a limited number of hours.""

Can i get cheap insurance on vw scirocco for first car?

im going to be getting my full license soon and im thinking to buy the scirocco for my first car but have been put of by the insurance that i will need to pay as im gonna be a new driver, the price id need to pay yearly is 4500 which is a lot and pretty much the same as owning a jeep GCsrt8 for your first car. i was wondering is there cheaper option?""

UK ONLY: Cheap car insurance for 17 years old male?

I passed my 1 and half months ago, and insurance seems to be no less than 3000 on every sites i look. I havent bought a car but the car im looking to insure is 00-02reg VW Polo 1.0ltr or 00-06reg Vauxhall Corsa 1.0-1.2ltr Both of them are manufacture standards without any modification or accidental repaired. I dont think i will be buying a car before i find a cheap and affordable insurace, happy to pay under 2000 Cannot have an additional driver as my parents do not drive. So can anybody please help me out or recommend me a company? Thank you in advance.""

How much is insurance for a street Motorcycle ?

How much would it cost me monthly for insurance on a street motorcycle. Original cost of motorcycle 4,500. I'm under 18 and have a GED hope that helps. Thanks""

No minnesota auto insurance?

if i dont have auto insurance will i loose my drivers license and for how long i live in mn.if im caught

Which would be less insurance wise?

I'm trying to figure out what car i want for my 16th birthday.. I've absolutely fell in love with the subaru wrx hatchback. the only thing im worried about is the fact that the insurance rates Might be high. i also like the Genesis Coupe 2.0t and i was wondering which would be more expensive insurance wise. Also what you think about them being first vehicles. and please no<, you should get a POS for a first vehicle... Thanks in advance!! The insurance company is usaa and nothing on the record""

Is unemployment insurance really an insurance?

1. What other insurance allows people who are guaranteed to be unemployed to be on it (such as actors, waiters, other short term employed workers)? 2. What other insurance is mandatory? Or, specifically, unlike car insurance, who is actually affected by being uninsured if one is unemployed?""

What are the pros and cons of cancer insurance?

Please help I'm am writting a research paper nd I need help for cancer insurance ..

""Poverty level, affordable health insurance plan for a family of 5?

i want to help my parents find health insurance that they can afford

Why does health insurance pay for doctor visits and teeth cleaning?

My car insurance doesn't pay for oil changes. Basic maintenance is up to me. As near as I can tell insurance is like an expensive savings account that you can take more money than you put in if needed.

Why is the tripling of insurance premiums called Affordable Health Care ?

I got a letter from my health insurance company that my current policy (which I was just fine with) would be cancelled in 2014 and if I did nothing I would automatically be changed ...show more

UK. Do you need insurance to learn to drive with your parents car?

i have my provisional Is the insurance expensive?

I need help with car insurance?

My parents are divorced and i live with them each 50% of the time. I just turned 16 and was put under my dads insurance. When im at my moms house am i allowed to drive her cars even though i am not listed under her insurance and live in her house part time???

I'm paying $3000 a year for car insurance..HELP?

Okay so I got into some accidents messing around along with some tickets a few years ago and about 2 in a half years ago a DUI. The car insurance should get lowered a little I think by next July 2014 because of good record for almost 3 years knock on wood so my question is should I attempt to find a different insurance by now or what? Or should I just sell car and find a ride with friends to work somehow? This is really taking every penny I have. I pay what I can while my family pays the rest. I've had plans to move to NC in Oct of this year in a apartment with my friend so I'm currently saving up around $3000 for expenses on bills, food, and whatever else which should last me until I find new job out there. Everything with us is getting split 50/50 but with me the car insurance is so high its going to be impossible to do. Help on what to do?? I'm not looking to stay at my parents house for very much longer so saving up isn't a option past oct.""

Do i need to have a insurance to get my car inspection?

do i need to have a insurance to get my car inspection?

Insurance on 2011 subaru STI?

I'm 19 sold my truck that had become a money pit and saved about 5 grand to put down on a new car. I make about $1950 a month at my job and have been there for a year. I came across a subaru Impreza STI for the price of $29000 only has 400 miles on the car and I can afford the payments per month (around $400) I'm just curious about insurance costs. I'm 19 been driving for 3 years no accidents and no tickets... What should I expect for insurance per month??(ballpark estimate) my insurance guy is not in til tomorrow just asking to see what you guys think

Corvette insurance. i need full coverage for a 1977. not collectors.where is the cheapest???????????????????

i will get collectors insurance in 2 months. right now i need full coverage to get the loan, transfer to me, and get it done friday. please help.""

What is an insurance quote?

I just want to know what it is because I always here it on car insurance commercials

Do your insurance rates go up when you file for bankruptcy?

What happens to your insurance rates if your car is stolen?

What does it take to commit a minor and how do you afford it if you don't have health insurance?

My uncle and aunt are struggling with my 16 year old cousin who suffers from anorexia and she will go up to 3 weeks without eating anything. I am not kidding she only drinks water and then she will slowly puree some fruit into her water again for about a week or two before she binges for a few days and then goes back to this cycle of starvation. She looks pale and has no energy. Her eyes are sunken in and she hides in her room unless shes on a binge and she cries and says shes ok when they tell her lets go see a doctor. My aunt and uncle are immigrants and they don't speak english that well. They don't have a lot of money or health insurance and I have no idea what to do but they are asking me to help! I've never dealt with this type of situation before and I'm just thinking they should call an ambulance and maybe they'll commit her to some state institution? I've been googling this and I come across all kinds of conflicting information. How can she get help in the state of California and is there any way if they are not insured to pay for her treatment? Is there any state aid related to extreme cases of anorexia?

What is the definite BEST car insurance company?

My boyfriend and I are both 20 years old and we own a 2001 honda civic dx hatchback. Right now were on a plan with my brother so it's cheaper on us(Farmers insurance) but we are going to be moving out and getting our place and start paying for our own stuff. I'm confused as to which car insurance company is really the best because they all they they're the best. So really... tell me which car insurance company is the best and why. Allstate, The general, 21st century, geico, progressive, farmers, esurance or nationwide? Also note we live in california.""

First Time Cars With Low Insurance?

I'm going to be starting Driving lessons soon and want to start thinking on what car to get as my first one so I can save up, though I don't know much about cars at all. So I'm looking for some advice on a good, but cheap, car (Either New or Used, if used I would like to know the general life expectancy from new in order to work out how long it will resonantly last) that will last me for at least 4 years and get me through my first Degree, I also would like it to have a fairly low insurance for a beginner driver as I am a college student, currently, and plan on doing my Masters (Starting next year) then my PHD, so I won't have a massive pot of funds. If anyone can help me I will be very grateful as I know nothing about cars, all my vehicle knowledge is of Motorbikes.""

What online auto insurance gives you multiple quotes and is free?

?????????? free quotes????????????????

Question about buying a car without insurance?

Hey everyone, I need answers without criticism as Im new to this and know as much as you did when you bought your first car. I live in Texas and I have my learners permit but will get my license in around a month or so. We found a great deal on a car I love, and my parents want to buy it. However, as I said, I dont have my license yet, therfore, I dont have insurance. I was wondering, if my parents want to buy the car and keep it at home in the garage until i get my license and can get insurance, how would it work from the moment I buy the car until I drive it home. My parents have full-cover insurance with State Farm in both their cars, each pays their own insurance, would their insurance cover a second (technically third) car? What would be the step to take? How can I drive the car in peace without being nervous about getting pulled over or something? Please no rude answers, im trying to do things right, thus im here asking, Thanks""

Is it normal for a dealer to ask me to put car on my insurance before i purchase it?

Car Insurance and Registration?

I am a Kansas Resident and have a Kansas Drivers License; however, I am studying in California for the next four years. I am receiving a car from my friend as a gift, but it's already registers at California. What do I do to make it legal for me to drive it?""

How long can you go without car insurance in Michigan before becoming high risk?

I just got screwed by my insurance place, and i want to cancel my policy immediately, but i won't be able to get car insurance again for at least a week. How long until i would become high risk in Michigan?""

""When you have a car accident and you are at fault and pay through your insurance, by how much will your All?

By how much will you All State insurance premium raise.

I am 16 almost 17 and am looking for a car and am wondering what the insurance rats would be on a porsche 944

this would be my second car and its a really nice 1985 Porsche 944 (non-turbo) it has only 67K miles on it and is in excellent shape I am just wondering if my insurance would go up i pay about 130 $ a month on a Pontiac grand am ... would it go up? if so do you know how much?

""How is mortgage hazard insurance calculated? Rate in Houston, TX?""

How is mortgage hazard insurance (I don't mean PMI.) calculated? Does the rate depend on what insurance company I go with? I am buying a house in Houston, Texas.""

What car insurance companies are in Washington? Can I get a list to look up?

I need to find the cheapest for myself. I am getting my license this Friday and I will be going to a car insurance company on my way home so that I can drive my car. Can I get a list of all the auto insurance companies in Washington?

Range Rover Sport Car Insurcnce... Is 6k too much?

My mum and dad's combined cost of car insurance on their Range rover sport HSE TDV6 (2.7litre) is around 1200. My dad rang up his insurance broker to get a quote on putting me as a named driver, and we got a quote of a total of about 6,000 per year. I know this is a lot of money, however the insurance company says this is because the car is in bracket 19. I was led to believe by my Land Rover dealer that the TDV6 model was in group 14/15, where it was the Supercharged 4.4litre model which was in group 18/19. Is this quote too much for the model car specified? Given i am 20 years old, having held my lisence for around 3 years with no motoring convictions against my name, and having also been a named driver for the best part of 3 years on a Ford Focus. Is it about right? Or is it slightly higher than one would expect for the car. Many Thanks""

""Insurance whilst working In italy for 7 months for an aussie company, anyone got any good recommendations?

My job is travelling around I already have basic Travel Insurance

Can i get insurance now?

I recently had my wisdom teeth taken out, and they said i needed to come back and get my teeth cleaned, and they said I'm gonna need some fillings or something, but there wasn't another appointment until June.. well i don't have dental insurance, so i had to pay for this all on credit cards, which is do-able i guess, since we dint use those cards for anything else, but i was wondering could i get dental insurance between now and then? or would it not cover the appointment thats already scheduled? where can i find affordable isurance?""

Where can i find affordable life insurance for my 81 yr old granmother?

I live in Illinois, and I work for the UI, but im not sure if I can add my grandmother on my insurance...So Im trying to find somewhere that will take senior citizens, but something i ...show more""

Life and income insurance?

If I started income and life insurance when i started property investment for investment purpose only to cover investment,are the monthly premiums tax deductible""

Insurance rate?

Hi, in the summer i'll be driving soon. Can anybody tell me how much I would have to pay to be insured for 6 months by Farmers? I'm 17, and I'm not eligible for the Good Student discount. I heard that my insurance rate would be cheaper if my parents add me to their policy. I'll probably be driving a 1990-1997 Mazda Miata MX-5. Also, what's a good, cheap auto insurance company do you guys recommend for teenagers?""

""What is the most reliable, low insurance, cheap small car-max budget 1200?""

I have an 'N' reg Nissan Micra, had it for around 4 years now, it's costing me more than it's worth in repairs and I need to get rid of it! It has been incredible reliable though, engine wise, just other stupid things (no doubt, age related) clutch has just gone and I could have done without that this side of xmas :( but at the moment, not in the position to replace it til next year. Trying to do my homework on cars til then, I have narrowed it down in this order: Volkswagen Polo Suzuki Swift Nissan Micra (obviously, a few years newer) Seat Ibiza (I know, budget pushing it on that one!) and finally, Ford Fiesta (don't know why, i find them so boring to look at, hence last on my list) Any view on above cars would be much appreciated, or other suggestions also. I need the car to be very low on insurance and economical to run as well.""

""Question for the car dealer...getting used cars for resale rock bottom..Manheim, Insurance Auto or co-part?""

ok.. I want to try my hand ( and if it works .. I will apply to be a dealer or some sorts myself ) at getting cars low price and selling them quick of like 10-20% profit. I 'd like to know what's the best place to buy cars CHEAP ( even if they are sightly damaged ) .....and resell them....Manheim ( I know thats a dealer-to-dealer auction . So I'd expect stuff to be very well marked on the price tag)... copart or Insurance Auto ( iaai as its called ) which one sells cars that are otherwise roadworthy , but very well discounted ( though some might need a cosmetic facelift )""

Can I own a car without insurance in NY?

I recently moved to New York from Illinois due to family issue. I am overwhelmed by the heavy traffic and how difficult it is to drive in NY. Fortunately the public transportation is convenient enough so I don't bother driving my car at all and about to sell it. However, my insurance is about to expire in days and I won't be driving this car until someone buys it. The car is registered in Illinois. Can I still keep my car in NY without insurance? What do I have to do with my license plate? What procedures do I have to follow if I sells my car in NY? I've been working very hard try to earn enough money to put my family together, any pennies less to spend is very helpful to my current situtation. Please if anyone can answer it! Much appreciated.""

What is the best insurance for a 16 year old?

Got limited money

Cheaper car insurance ?

Which insurance companies out of the major ones have you found that are the cheapest for a 19 year old on their own policy?

Will this car have high insurance for a 16yr old?

I want a 2000 honda civic si and ill be 16 in 3yrs but i was wondering about how much a used one would be and about how much the insurance is??

Forced placed auto insurance?

I'd been trying to have forced place insurance removed for quite a few months now, and after reading some stories here, see I'm not alone. I've always had full coverage insurance but since I switched carriers it was one thing after another ... Add them as lien holder -done, didn't receive notice from insurance company, didn't receive fax with notification, etc. .... Now, some months later, I'm in an accident and car may be totaled (not good news since the loan balance exceeds the cars worth). Am I correct in understanding that the lien holders forced insurance policy will relieve me of any difference in the balance, similar to if I had gap insurance?""

How much should a Insurance CSR make?

I live in a little town in California, I have been working for well established Insurance agency since May 2012. I just recently got licensed so now I carry my P and C license. I am getting 12 an hour plus health insurance, am I being under paid? Im not getting commission even though I have brought new business in and have written policies. Your answers are very much appreciated. Thank you.""

Car Insurance Cheap!!!?

Where to find really cheap car insurance?

""How much will i get from insurance if my car is totaled?Also, I am NOT at fault.?""

I just got into a car accident with my Toyota 4-runner ('97) and it looks to be totaled. Some guy just turned onto to the street and stopped, taking up the whole two lanes which left me no choice but to hit him head on. What I want to know is: 1. If my car is not repairable, how will I be covered? 2. Will I get the cost of the car? 3. If not, if anyone knows, please do tell me. Seriously, I really think my car is totaled. The car has been paid off years ago and I really don't want to deal with buying a new car and doing the whole car payment thing over. Thank you.""

California New Driver Law penalty?

My son just got his drivers license in California. I'm trying to get him to understand the penalty of driving with other kids in the car, when he's not allowed to. Does anyone know the penalty for doing so? How much is the ticket, what it could do to his insurance, etc.? Thanks everyone""

How much would my insurance cost? (volkswagon knowledge needed)?

Hi so i am in the process of looking for my first car....now i am not spoiled i promise i earned all my own money...My friends father buys cars, fixes them up, and resells them. It so happens to be that he has a very good condition 2001 Volkswagon Passat W8 with basically everything you can get in a car. Sunroof, heated seats, memory seats, cd and cassette player, nice stereo system, auto matic seats, steering radio controls, and a few other simple things... The color is black. Now he is asking about 9000 give or take for the car.. I need help with how much my insurance could cost as a 17 year old. If it helps i'm not in it for the car as much as just something that looks nice and goes that i know wont break down....everything is new, the brakes, oil, everything all checks out....I know that the color and the model will have a big effect with what the cost is... I am pretty much an A to a B+ average student so thats good... I just want a general idea of what it would cost for insurance a month. Like i said the car is black and has stock rims, and has a W8 engine. Please and thank you...If you need information just say so""

Where can I find affordable life insurance for sr citizen in-laws?

I read a previous thread suggesting MediCare, but I am not talking about HEALTH insurance. They only have term life insurance tied to current job, and they need to retire. They have ...show more""

Is it normal for a dealer to ask me to put car on my insurance before i purchase it?

How much will the insurance company offer for my car?

a couple questions and description..... my car was involved in an accident and deemed a total loss. I was curious on how much the insurance company may offer? the accident was not my fault. i would like to buy it back though and fix it. how much do they usually offer a totaled car back for? its a 1994 honda accord lx with 128500 on her. shes in good condition with a small 1/4 size spot of rust on the left rear fender. everything else is in working condition. its a dark blue/green color. A/C, cruise, good tires, new cd player/ am/ fm, new speakers, new timing belt, distributor and ignition switch. it has a 2.2 4cylinder, automatic. any help is appreciated. interior is very clean, and paint was good condition. thank you!""

I think this is how much $ i will need for everything to move out..can you review it & tell me anything wrong?

please tell me if im forgeting anything or if i am expecting to pay too much or too little for something CAR down payment - 5,000 insurance-300 gas-300 monthly payment-500 maintenance-100 HOUSING security deposit- 2400 rent-800 electric-150 furniture-2000 OTHER THINGS food- 300 linens-150 kitchen appliences-350 cleaning supplies-30 shampoo, soap, toothpaste (things like that)-70 tv-300 computer-600 cable- 100 phone- 75 cell phone- 160 internet- 100""

""How much is car insurance for a 25 yr,female primary driver-Owning and being insured for the first time-Canada""

This will be the first time, I own and insure a car. It will be a new model, either 2006 or 2007 sedan or SUV. I am 25 years old. I am a female. I have had my DL for 3-4 years now. I've only been insured under my mother's insurance (for short times, while visiting her in the States!) Upon, buying my own new vechile, in Canada, I was wondering, what the range would be for: A.) Myself being primary driver B.) Additional, second driver, boyfriend 24, new first time driver! C.) A + B If someone could help me out, I would be greatful on any information or links pertaining to Canadian information. Cheers, Jennifer""

How much would it cost to get insurance for this type of business?

Let's say I want to start a small small business where I essentially find companies who are looking for window cleaning and then I find sub contractors to do the work and I get paid the difference between the amount I get from the company and the amount I pay to the sub for doing the work. How much would it cost to get insurance on this type of business in California? Also what type of insurance would I need? Also I wouldn't have any employees. Just a one man operation.

Why would young people refuse to sign up for inexpensive health insurance?

Don't they know they will soon be older people in need of affordable health care? Or that community rated affordable insurance depends on a high rate of participation? Why would they want to subvert a system they will soon depend on?

How much health insurance coverage do I get as a military spouse?

I am a newly married Air Force wife. I am currently enrolled for TriCare North Standard coverage for health insurance. Does anybody out there have TriCare North Standard coverage and ...show more

Whats the cheapest place to get insurance?

I got a 01 kia optima im 23 years old, male, and paying about 100 dollars a month for full coverage. Company: American Family. Any better deals""

Does getting a Health Insurance quote run your credit?

I wanted to know if getting a quote from a health insurance provider (not through a job) runs a credit check? I never actually filled out the application, but I answered some questions to get quotes.""

Car insurance question?

I just turned 16 and got my driving permit. I would be using my grandmothers car and she has erie insurance. My question is.. Am I allowed to practice driving on the car even without getting insurance? She insists that I'm not allowed to unless I get insurance but everyone else I know does it without. She thinks that I am going to get in a crash because I can't keep my room clean. (wtf?)

How do i get insurance for a party?

having a party and venue request a certificate of insurance..i have no other insurance other than auto..how can i get a coi cheap and fast

Geico car insurance?

I'm interested in transferring my car insurance to Geico. I went to their website and filled out the electronic form, and the amount came out quite expensive. I thought it was going to be cheaper. Should I call them and speak with a rep for more accurate info?""

I am trying to get health insurance however I do not have a home base with my job?

I contantly move from one place to another after only a month or a few. Does anyone know if there is any company that can cover someone like me who moves from state to state? The company I have spoke to said they only cover someone in one state and when you leave the state you only would get covered for emergency situations.

Does anybody know of a company that will insure me daily on hire and reward insurance?

I want to run a one vehicle WAV (wheel chair accessible vehicle for disabled people) car hire/rental business serving Hertfordshire the customer would hire the car and arrange for a person to drive it for them. On the odd occasion the hirer does not have anybody to drive the car for them they might want me to drive for them I have been told to do this I would need a private vehicle hire licence (mini cab drivers licence) also hire and reward insurance along with a mini cab office operators licence and the vehicle would need to be plated (tested) This is not a problem except for the hire and reward insurance which would be about 3000 per year and would not be cost effective for the amount of driving I would be doing (I would probably only be driving a customer 1 day per week). Does anybody know of a company that will insure me daily on hire and reward insurance?

Going on parents car insurance!?

Hi i am enquiring here, I have my driving test in 2 weeks 7th July, and i am looking around for cars and while i am getting quotes for car insurance they are quite dear at 19 even with a small engined car, i was wondering can i go on my parents insurance which i know can cut the cost quite a lot, but can i use my own car and add the car and me as the main driver of that car and it still stay relatively cheap? i have read up on the illegal action know as ''fronting'' and i want to avoid that happening but don't want to be forced onto my own insurance and be spending hundreds of pounds a month? any help or advice would be appreciated""

Mexican auto insurance for Americans?

Anyone have any idea what is the best Company out there which gives the cheapest auto insurance rate for Americans in Mexico. Also if their service is good or bad compared to the other insurance companys when claims are made ?.

I got pulled over in someone else's car that doesn't have insurance but I have my own?

Ok so I'm driving one of my friends car and I got pulled over for making an illegal u-turn. The car had no insurance and the cop told me to just show up to court and show them that I have proof of insurance on my own car and the ticket will be dropped? Is this true? Please help me, I don't really wanna pay an $800 for driving without insurance""

""Best car insurance, in your opinion?

I'm getting my car insured by myself for the first time and would appreciate any advice!!

Why car insurance quote from tesco is 550 whereas competitors quote over 1000 ?

i went through swinton, axa ,norwich union, high performance, churchil, and a couple others. they did not even come close...is this possible? i am a bit suspicious, if that tesco quote is reliable, but they say when i call that i can complete the whole process online and i do enter the same detail as on other websites.""

Insurance for teenager?

I just need an in general Really what I need is a website where I might be able to fill out some information to get an average of what my insurance might be. I will get my license soon. I have a high GPA around 3.5 and will be driving a dodge spirit in ohio. Anyone have any idea around what my insurance would be?

Do you need car insurance to rent a car in Massachusetts?

I have insurance for my own car but will Hertz rental make me pay for their auto insurance? Can i just say I already have insurance even though I don't know if mine will cover me in case something happens? I have the least amount of coverage you can get in Mass and I use Commerce Insurance.

Affordable insurance?

I want to start a new job They will offer me and my family a great insurance plan expense free The only catch is that it will not take affect for 6 months The present plan paid for by my employer will only last for 30 days once I leave this job Does anyone know of a basic affordable health insurance plan that i can purchase for 5 months Thank You

Average amount of settle payouts from substandard insurance companies?

How does car insurance work?

My boyfriend and i were talking after we saw an accident on the highway it was clearly the older mans fault. My boyfriend was saying how it sucked that even though he hit the lady she still had to pay her deductible (usually around $500) to get her car fixed. I was always under the impression that the reason we had insurance was to insure that we didnt get stuck paying for someone elses dumb *** mistake. anyone know how this actually works?

Classic car insurance companies?

anyone know any classic car insurance companies that will have 17yr olds??

Would my insurance go up?

I got into an accident because it was raining and the floor was slippery I was going max25 and the car slipped to the side and fliped over. Im planing to get an infinity g37 2 door car. Would my insurance go up? I had an 2006 nissan fronteir.

Is it normal for a dealer to ask me to put car on my insurance before i purchase it?

Can someone please explain the diff. between term life insurance and regular life?

Also is it better to just by a plot burial and lock in the rates today, my job does not offer life insurance and i would like some type of reassurance for my family if i were to die. I'm in the 25-35 yr range group, can anyone suggest polices or explain them altogether!""

How to get low mileage discount from Progressive auto insurance?

I know that many companies will give a huge discount on your automotive insurance premiums if you supply them with proof that you drive far fewer miles than average. I understand that the best way to do this would be to mail a copy of recent vehicle inspections so that they can officially see the low mileage driven over time. However, Progressive does not mention anything, anywhere about low mileage discounts. I have been told you have to ask for this, or else you would never know it is possible. Does anyone have any knowledge, advice, tips, etc regarding this? Furthermore, does anyone know how you would go about this specifically with Progressive?""

Can I have a car title in my name & insurance in my dads?

Right now I am listed as a Second Driver under his insurance, and he is on the title of my car. Makes it so I don't have to pay an arm and a leg for insurance as a college student. 270 every 3 months for full coverage is great. I'm getting a new (used) car. I am putting down 3/4 in cash and the rest in a small loan. He is an extremely busy person so I was wondering if I could purchase the car with the title in my name and still be listed as a 2nd driver under his insurance, but the car be under his name/insurance, even though the car is in my name?""

""Is it true that the older the car, the lower the insurance cost?""

My dad has a car that is 4 years old, it is a subaru outback, with 200,000+miles on it (not a typo, he drives it all over the eastern coast). Now would the subarus insurance cost(total) be lower than if i bought my own used car?""

Car vs Motorcycle?

I have a Chevy Cobalt that get around 35mpg but I drive over 150 miles a day should I get a motorcycle to save money? if so what kind I was think about a Ninja 250 i weigh 165 pounds and am 5'10

Car insurance...?

I am thinking about buying a 1999 ford fiesta sometime. I have opted for a 5 door car rather than a 3 door car. I have heard of some people paying up to 3k per year for insurance. How much difference roughly in terms of would having 5 doors make in stead of 3? And what would be the difference rouughly between insuring a car with a 1.8 diesel engine than something like a 1.4 diesel engine? I want to get a car when I have passed my driving test.

Does anyone know of anykind of affordable health insurance for my mother?

She is age 62, never worked outside the home, and presently does not have health insurance...""

When was car insurance for teens increased?

I was wondering how long and in what year was car insurance for teens increased? links would be very helpful... Thanks All!

Why has my car insurance quote shot up overnight?

My renewal is on the 3rd October, so I've been already looking around for the cheapest deal. It was up until today 852.09 for 3rd party, Fire and Theft. However, today it has gone up to 1433.07...which is almost as much as last year. I've also noticed that the cheapest insurance provider (the one that provided me with the 852.09 quote) is no longer providing me with a quote, and that it's forcing me to have to go with the second lowest price...but all the other companies quotes have gone up as well... My birthday is next week as well, so I'm wondering if it has gone up to take advantage of the possibility of me having to buy new insurance cover or something? Really finding it hard to find the reason how the quotes can have gone up by so much over-night with no change in my quote information at all :/ My details: 19 Years old Male 1 Years NCB Punto Sporting Thanks in advance!""

AAA insurance question! I just got my license!?

I just got my license today! I'm 18 and live in California. 1. Can I drive with people under 18? 2. My mom has AAA auto insurance for her car, and that's what I was driving when I had my permit. Is it still ok to drive the car now that I have my license? 3. I didn't understand the scoring system. I got 5 wrong, and obviously passed what is that in a letter grade or percent? Thanks. God Bless.""

Car Insurance for Tourists?

I bought a new car in Germany. It is insured through its manufacturer. I then left Germany and went to another country to work and live. Since I wanted to keep the car, I drove it to my new home! For the first 3 months (I am told) I am still insured as a Tourist. But I wonder... Say I have an accident in this new country, we exchange insurance details, etc... Where should the other driver go to get his compensation and file his claim? Has anyone ever had an accident with, say even, a rental car from another country and found out that they live elsewhere and . . . How should one deal with this situation where there might even be language barriers between the two drivers and the forms they have to fill in? Thanks in advance

Car insurance cancelled on financed car..?

So I've been looking for a way out of my car loan lately because the payments are really too much for me right now...I know I shouldn't have got into it but I was young and VERY gullible. I just got a letter in the mail from my insurance company asking for me to verify the address I have on file with them ( where I park my car at night) or else they will cancel my coverage. So if they cancel my coverage, will I still be held accountable for the car loan? Or will I have to pay the balance off? Any advice would be greatly appreciated. :-)""

How much is car insurance for teenagers or New drivers ?

Hello, My father is planning on buying me a a car when I get job to pay for my own insurance. I was wondering how much car insurance would be for me. I am 16. How much would it be if I'm also on my parents plan ? You don't have to give the exact price, just a price range. . . And the car would be a regular nissan or economy car.""

Would you switch car insurance companies after 10 years to save money?

Since 1997 I've been with the same car insurance company. Have had FANTASTIC service and support with claims and general questions. I use the same company for car insurance, home owner's insurance, life insurance, and to manage my IRA. When pricing out alternatives I realize that I could save about $50 a month by switching my car insurance to esurance. I attempted to get my current insurance to match their price without success. I'm very leery about possibly loosing my excellent service and support from my current company. Would you switch to a new company, and possibly a worse company, to save money?? I can easily afford my current company, but I'd obviously love having an extra $50 a month to plan with.""

New driver needs car insurance - NOT a teen!?

I'm a 23-year old woman living in North Carolina. I'm getting my license for the first time and desperately need *affordable* car insurance. Problems? I am an orphan, so I can't be added to my parents' policy. I don't live alone, but cannot be added to my roommate's policy. Most insurance companies have told me that b/c I don't live alone, I can't get a nonowner's policy, which is fine, but the prospect of paying $5,000 for a 6-month policy is unimaginable. Does anyone know where I can start? I will get my restricted license (restricted due to NC's financial liability requirement) next week and need to get insurance and a car ASAP. HELP!""

Can parents get sued if I drive a car without insurance?

My mom tried to tell me that if I drive without insurance they would be sued because I live with them. I am 19 so I am a legal adult. The car is also in my name only. I think she was just talking out her *** personally, but now I am curious if that is even possible. Whatsoever.""

Car insurance Questions!! HELP!!!?

My wife and I bought a used car the other day. The car dealership didnt require us to have insurance on it before we left because we paid cash for it. Well on the way home she got into a wreck. It was her fault. Someone said that the dealership covers the car up to 30 days from the time you bought it?? Does anyone know abt this? Or know how I can have it covered? Thanks

Good grades for car insurance?

I was wondering what type of grade avarage that you need to have to get the good grade discount. and how much of a discount does it give you 100$ 50$ 20$???

What will happen if i dont pay my car insurance this month?

I am a student and find it financially. I recently had to get my car repaired so I now do not have enough money to pay my insurance this month (192.10) I was thinking of asking if I can skip this month and request double payment this month? What are the consquences of not paying the insurance for a month. My friend believes it can damage the policy and they may ask for the full ammount? Im with quinn direct

Can insurance find out you have a license if you don't tell them about it?

hey guys, i'm about to get my license but before i do i was wondering:can the insurance company find out if you get your license without you telling them and jack up your rates? the reason i ask is because i'm not interested in getting insurance for myself at the moment i just wanted to get the test out of the way.""

Insuring a VW Beetle?

i really want a red VW Beetle, the newer version, but not really new so it costs tons. I would be a 1st time buyer at 17/18 years old. what is the average price for that car and what does the insurance cost nowadays?""

Can i use my car insurance to pay for damage to my car?

Some idiot decided not to own up to denting my car at the weekend, so now i am left to foot the bill which judging by the damage is not going ot be cheap. The moron whoever he/she is has dented both passenger side doors. As i have never been in this situation i am not sure if i can use my car insurance to pay for the damage, especially as i dont know who damaged my car in tyhe first place. I am fully comp with Tesco.""

Car Insurance?

Ok, first does anyone know which states do not require car insurance? Second question is do you have to have full coverage on a financed car? No silliness here real answers.""

Up to how much can health insurance cost?

I'm doing a speech about why I think health care should be free, so I'm wondering whats the range of cost on health insurance?""

What happens if you lye to you car insurance company?

When I was 18 and I first got my car insurance policy my mom convinced me to set my adress to my uncle's house because it was cheaper. It is but, now that I'm 20 I'm starting to have second thoughts about it. What can possibly go wrong with this?""

Is it normal for a dealer to ask me to put car on my insurance before i purchase it?

https://www.linkedin.com/pulse/what-car-can-i-get-cheapest-insurance-month-daniel-ruiz/"

0 notes

foursprout-blog · 6 years

Text

You Saved My Life And I Don’t Even Know Your Name

New Post has been published on http://foursprout.com/happiness/you-saved-my-life-and-i-dont-even-know-your-name-2/

You Saved My Life And I Don’t Even Know Your Name

Nicholas Kwok / Unsplash

I see you sometimes. You’re the kid the same age as my little sister who’s crossing the street as I sit in traffic at a red light. You’re the guy whose laugh everyone noticed in the busy restaurant last night. You’re the barista who gives me a large instead of a small. I want to know you. I want to know your family. I want to know what your dreams are. Where do you see yourself in ten years? Do you want a family? Do you like dogs or cats more? Are you a cheese person? Because I can eat a wedge of sharp cheddar at an alarming rate. Can you belt out disco music at the top of your lungs in the shower like me? Do you have brothers or sisters? Are you happy? Are you in love? Then the car behind me honks and shouts because the green light is close to fading to yellow and I realize I’ve been daydreaming about you again. I don’t know anything about you. Not your favorite color. Not the band you listen to on repeat. Not your birthday. Nothing, not even your name. I think about you more than I care to admit. I have all of these questions I would give anything to have answered. But then I remember the question I’ve been asking since you saved my life.

How did you die?

As I write this, there’s a prescription bottle to the right of me. This one pill that I now take will be a part of me until the day I die, just as what you gave to me will be with me until that same day. This little white capsule keeps the organ you gave to me without fear of rejection. I don’t know why I’m telling you this. Perhaps it’s to distract myself from the fact that I have no idea what to say to you. How do I thank you? How do I honor your death? My God, I wish that I could tell you that I will find the cure for cancer, write something that helps bring world peace, or do something spectacular with this second chance. But I’d be lying if I didn’t tell you that all I want is to be healthy. And thanks to you, I’ve become pretty good at that.

69 days was all it took. Day one, I walked in with what I thought was a nasty cold paired with a possible urinary tract infection. Less than 10 weeks later at the ripe age of 25, I was waiting to die in a hospital bed in the ICU. But then, my dream team came in and told me about a young man whose liver would fit me perfectly. Yours. Eight hours of surgery later, you had saved my life. I went in for surgery on Wednesday night, and I came through the other side on Friday morning. After tubes and bandages were pulled and ripped from my body, they walked in, my mom and my kid sister. That feeling of them being allowed to hug and hold my face is something I will never forget. The tears and the happy sobs of gratitude. To look into their bloodshot eyes. The smell of coffee and relief on their breath. The warm sun was coming through the windows on that cloudy January morning. I have never felt such love for life. When I think about that moment, I often think of your family and what may have been the worst moment of their lives.

I was never told your name. Everything has been kept confidential. I’ve tried writing your family, but I thought that writing you may come easier. “Male, age 21” was all that they would tell me. The first thing I thought of was my sister. You came into this world the same year that she had. And naturally, my next thought was of your siblings and what you must mean to them. The very idea of losing my little sister makes even inhaling hurt. If roles were reversed, I would have given my life up for hers in the blink of an eye. You see, my little sister is my favorite person on this big ball of blue. She’s funny, and she ’s strong, and she’s just the best person despite everything that she’s had to endure. And now, she was going to have to face my death. Before you came to save the day, no one could sit with me and act as if things were normal, until she came. My sister was the only one who could still put a genuine smile on my face. Even on what we thought could be the last days of my life, she made me laugh. She crawled into my hospital bed, held my hand, and we took selfies. Silly, I know. I think of her and how my life would never be the same without her. She was my very first best friend. I can’t help but think of what your brothers and sisters must feel. So I promise you that I will be the best big brother in the entire world to her. I will love her when she comes home with a new tattoo or falls in love with some idiot who isn’t worth her time. I promise you that I will hug her tight every time that I see her.

We were left with the question of “how?” How did you pass? Was it sudden? Was it an accident? Did a stranger not call an Uber after too many drinks? Was it the rain we had been having? Were you out with friends? Celebrating a belated new year? I guess it doesn’t matter. I wish I knew your name though. So much so, that I’ve given you one despite never knowing a thing about you. I call you Sam. No particular reason to be honest. I was at a concert and the artist’s last song she sang was by the same name. I fell in love with the song and what it meant, and you came to mind. It was meant to be. Sam. I say your name a lot these days. Often times, when I’m doing something that I don’t want to do or a task which is proving to be difficult. Getting out of bed on a workday. Making it the last five minutes on the treadmill. Or even something as simple as taking the garbage bins out the night before. I think of you and say your name because you will never have the chance to do such things again. These “burdens” are a blessing to me now. I remember being in the hospital post-transplant and my discharge date kept being pushed back further. And further. And further. I could not wait to get out of that sterile hospital room with its fluorescent lighting and not just be alive, but honestly living. Eat real food. Hug my family. Order a cup of coffee. Pay a utility bill. Take my dog for a walk. Deal with these everyday burdens. And then I would think of the good parts. Like being stupid with my two best friends.

It took 11 days for them to come and see me after the transplant. They kept me sane, loved me back to life a time or two, and got me out of my head long before being locked in an ICU and being told that I was going to die. In reality, these two people who I’ve shared my life with know me differently than anyone else on this planet. They can take one glance at me and know something’s off. They each can call me on my shit when no one else can just as they can make me laugh so hard that tears flow freely down my face. We have walked beside one another during the very worst moments of our lives. Have no fear; they have also been within an arm’s reach during my most cherished memories. When my body was healing with seventy-seven staples keeping you inside of me, they would send or say things that nearly split the stitches from too much laughing. Thank you for that. There would be no laughter with my two best friends if it weren’t for you. I promise to keep laughing and to hold them close. I promise to never keep things from them. I promise you that I will love them until the three of us are old, wrinkled grumps on some porch together talking about the days of our youth.

Of all of the people who have felt your loss, your mother comes to mind most often. Likely because of what mine means to me. Before I was diagnosed, the thought of death did not terrify me. I’ve lost people and the tears would always come, but somehow, a thought of knowing that they were going to be okay would find me. Their spirit is only shedding its body. When I was told that I was going to die without an organ such as yours, a fear I had never known grasped me hard and would not let go. It was not a fear of dying, but a fear of the life that I had yet to live. I had so many things that I wanted to do, so many things that I wanted to see, and to hear, and to experience. I was not ready to die. My mother was holding my hand when the doctor gave me a death sentence. And all I could think of was not being there for her. To dance with her at my wedding. To introduce her to her grandchildren for the first time. To tell her that everything was going to be okay. To never come home again. She was the first one I thought of when I came out of surgery and was conscious. Before they had removed the breathing tube or had taken the tape off of my eyes, they put a pen into my hand to write questions. All I could write was, “Where’s Mom?” Where is she? Why isn’t she here? And before I knew it, she was. I think of your mother and I cannot fathom the loss she has in the center of her being. I want to thank her, but at the same time I want to apologize. I want to tell her that I’m sorry. I may never find the cure or the reason as to why you were taken from her and why I was given a second shot. I’d hug her and I’d probably cry because this whole dying thing has made me an emotional fucking wreck. I promise that I’ll thank her and the rest of your family. I promise to tell her that her baby’s life will not have been lost on me. I’d ask her about you and I’d soak it all in. All of it.

At the very least, I promise to ask her your name.

But until then, I will call you Sam. And I will live for you, Sam. When fear grabs hold of me and keeps me from doing something, I’m going to do it regardless. I’m going to do it for you. As my fingers type these words, I glance at the calendar next to me and see the date. In two days, it will be one year since you saved my life. To say this past year has been an adventure would be putting it lightly. I fought hard. I cried more than I would care to tell you, but most of these tears were happy tears. I am still lost and pondering why this happened. I still think about you, about your family, about life before that dreadful diagnosis day in November. Up until recently, I wasn’t big on making plans for tomorrow. Or the next day. The thought of making plans and thinking of the future had become something only others got to do. I couldn’t think of that when I must be grateful for merely this very moment. How could I want for something years down the line when it was a miracle to be here right now? And then one night after hearing of a friend gone too soon, in walked my old friend Fear. Fear of getting sick again. And as I sat there crying with hands shaking, someone very close to my heart told me that I could no longer be afraid to plan for tomorrow. Is there a chance that I will get sick again? You betcha. But I’ve decided to pull out my planner despite that truth. So this is my promise to you. I promise to get stronger than before. I promise to fall in love again. I promise to get married, and have babies, and travel this world, and dance to Donna Summer with a block of Tillamook in hand, and hug my people a tad too long. I promise to meet your family one day. I promise never to take my loved ones for granted or forget the beautiful burdens for what they are, a gift. I may not save the world, but you saved mine, and I will always remember that.

Promise.

#Happiness

0 notes

amayapapayaaa · 6 years

Text

It finally happened!!! I’ll start from the very beginning. Freshman year (2013), I saw this fineeeee ass nigga walking through campus. He was a Que and much older so of course I never thought he’d be interested in little ole me. S/n: Thank Jesus I’m not as insecure as I used to be. Anywaysss, so like every time I saw him we would always stare at each other. Hmm or maybe he was always wondering why I was staring at him lmao. Whatevs. I never actually spoke or had a conversation with him though....until last year. I followed him on ig and always liked his pictures and everything lmao. All my friends knew that he was my man lmao. Last year my suite mate and him were cool so one day she made me come over and speak to him. I was smiling and grinning so damn hard lmaooo. I’m pretty sure he knew I wanted him though. He’s not stupid. I was always staring, liking pics, and smiling when he came around. Anywaysss, so back to spring semester. It was SH birthday. Sis was drunk af and went over there to tell him I wanted to say hi lol. So he came over and introduced himself. This man said “yo friend said you got a little crush on me...i got a crush on you too” LMAO I’m sure he was drunk and that was not the case but whatever. Even though I was so fake in love, I honestly knew I just wanted to fuck. So he gave me his number, I think. Or maybe I gave him mine 🤔 Whatever lol. Either way we were texting or whatever and he kept saying he wanted to take me on a date but he was always working late. So he ended up just inviting me over. S/N: my sis RJ already fucked him like years ago. She told me that his penis was small and that she knew for sure if I went to his house he was going to try to fuck me. Okay back to the story lol. So I get there and we’re chilling in the living room, talking. He told me to relax, take my jacket off, and that I didn’t have to look so scared lol. Then he gave me a tour of his house lmao. Which was just the living room/kitchen, his sons room (YES he has an almost 7 year old. Don’t think I mentioned that), the bathroom, his room, and then the basement. We went to the basement and I instantly notice alllll of this omega stuff lol. And I notice a picture. It’s of him and his line brothers....T (I’ll just say T because you never know who can find this lmao). Fall of my sophomore year I was fucking T for like a good month lol. Don’t ask why. He turned out to be a complete asshole. At first he was nice to me and always telling me I’m pretty, chilling with me blahblahblah then after, he came out to be the dog that omega makes them. Anywayssss that’s another story for another day. However, I don’t think it ever dawned on me that they were linebrothers. But okay. So we’re chilling in the basement, he orders us food and we’re looking for something to watch on netflix. We’re talking about how I have never seen some “black people” movies lol. So we pick a movie, smoke, and wait for our food. We were occasionally talking and ya know getting to know each other. Food comes, we eat, then he kept going outside to make sales lol. Cool, I’m chilling texting my friends like girlll he got money. Almost 2 hours in, this nigga comes downstairs with a bottle of Henny and starts drowning it lol. Like he just knew he was going to fuck lol. But nahhhhh sir not happening. At least not that day lmaooo. That was spring semester. So over the summer he’s watching my snaps and sending me heart eyes to pictures, whatever, whatever. He one time messaged me saying we should go out for drinks but that never happened lol. So of course now, fall 17, we’re back staring at each other but speaking, hugging, and that’s it lol. Almost every Thursday at Friday’s we’re eyeing each other but doing nothing about it. Except the second week of the semester I was super lit at Friday’s and I sent him the 👀 after lol. And he sent them back but I didn’t reply lol. Cause RJ told me he has a girlfriend 🙄. Fast forward to the end of the semester, this past Thursday. I was DRUNK as fuck lmaooo. And I kept telling my friends I was going home with him. When I was in the bathroom they even text me saying “your man here” lmao. This time he was right next to our booth and kept watching me the whole timeeee 😋 After we left I sent the eyes and he said what you bouta do. I was shocked lmao. Told him I was taking my friends home and then I was coming through. So he sent the address, I came back, showered and was on my way. I got there and we were both LIT as fuck lmao. So we were sitting in the living room chatting for a few then we went to his bedroom. We found something to watch and were making jokes. Then next thing you know his head is between my legs lmaooo. Like he started caressing me and then boom 💥 He started slurping up Nicki like a slurpee lmaooo. He was so into it 😍 I was riding his face. He kept slapping and biting my ass. After like 20 minutes of him gulping me (lmao) I exchanged the favor. Now when he pulled off his pants I was looking for the zick. Like looking SO hard because it was almost nonexistent 💀 It was so smalllll omg I wanted to cry because I was so disappointed in the cutie with the lil dootie. Like he’s so fine, tatted, muscles mixed w/ a lil chubby, nice teeth, seemingly very intelligent, a lil coin, but a very very very small package. I’m so sad because I’ve been plotting on him since 2013 😭 😭 😭. Like y’all dont understanddddd man. I just knew I was gonna be a step mom to his kid and everything. But only God can help with his small package lmao. Back to the story so he flipped me so we could 69 and I’m really just like licking out my tongue, and sucking his small package while simultaneously sobbing on the inside. So then he flips me back over onto my back. And I THOUGHT he was about to try to stick it in without a condom. Almost had a mini heart attack lmao. But he was just trying to taste 😋 me again. Then after forcing me to cum with his tongue. He grabbed the condom. Alright...cool...I guess 😐 So he grabs it, puts it on. Starts stroking me and I feel absolutely NOTHING. Like nothing at all. NOTHINGGG. But whatever, I guess. So then after a few strokes he’s like turn over. For a second I thought he was going to ram my shit from behind....idk why I thought that would happen. He puts it in but nothing lmaoo. Like it went limp. I seriously was tearing the fuck up. This nigga gets up, pees, and then comes back. So he starts slurping me again trying to get it back hard. Then I get up to pee. Meanwhile this nigga gets up and gets water like he’s putting in serious work 💀. Comes back I sucked it again, then he puts another condom on and we try again. This time it work but I didn’t feel a thing omg 😢 I even text my friends in the middle of it because I was so sad. Then after like maybe 10 strokes he came and thought he was gonna take that condom off and put his nut on me 😒 Yeah, no. Hell naw. He was tripping lol. I mean honestly, between us. I did like swallow but that was me being nice. 🤫 Don’t tell anyone because my friends don’t even know. But then I got dressed and went to sleep. He woke up, showered. Then I got up and dressed. Left and came back to get ready for work. Oh while I was getting dressed there’s a framed photo of him and some girl from vacation 2017 lol. Anywayssss not my business because that’s never happening again. Like unless he just wants to taste me and not fuck. That’s never happening again. Never. Ever. Ever. He kept telling me I was cakey lmaooo 💅🏾 I was pressed lmfao. Like he kept saying “damn you low key cakey as fuck. Anywayssss moral of this story is becareful what you ask for because it may come in a small package.

0 notes

lolipopncookies · 7 years

Text

Here a story 6 years ago. I don’t know should I call love or true friends, a man or and angel. Should I begin with introduce myself first or introduce him. Hmm.. Ok let begin with me, biar u all questioning.. hahaha..

Hi my name is Christie Christ Chin. I’m Living in kota kinabalu, a state that full of culture and race. I’m 17 years old now. Living with my mom. I don’t have any brother and sister. I love candy especially lollipop. Here is my first feeling stories about a guy i named him cookies.

(Hmmmm??????? Bluring.. where to start ah???… But I clearly remember all start in a morning..

Christie.. Christieee wake up.. time go to school.. Hmm.. Good Morning mommy..(In yawing) Huhhhh.. Another boring days I need go through.. Ahhh…boring.. then i hold my two hand and i pray.. “Good morning Jesus, today Christie pray again… As Jesus know, Christie feel empty.. Please granted Christie a friend a true friend k.. where Christie can share,can count on just like u Jesus. I love u Jesus..ops..oh-ya.. A friend that not like i meet at school k.. I love u Jesus and mmm Amen”.

Hmm…ok..be strong go through another day..

I prepared my self like usually and my mom sent me to school.

(Like usually in school,, Boring.. Yaww..fast…fast..fast.. I look at my watch.. Ringgg… yes time to go home.. i quickly close my book stuff in my bag and go home.. The end of crazy Friday.. yay..

Moment i walk to the school gate.. like usually their always somebody greeting.. Bye Christie.. by liang moi.. No please.. and i also heard someone said… so egoist.. scum..

I dint reply any of them i just want to quickly go home.. after the school gate.. i saw mom car.. i ran to it and enter the car.. “just like a little girl ran to grab a lollipop”.

Christie : Hi mommy.. can mommy let me play lappy today.. only a while.. plss…

Mom : Hmm.. yes..but after u have your lunch and bath.. don forget doing your homework first… only a while..

Yesss. Thanks. I love you mommy..

Arrived home.. i quickly finished my lunch and take a bath.. done all my homework.. really cant wait to play lappy.. I really seldom play my lappy.. mommy only let me play it sometime.. i thinks mommy in good mood today.. hmm but why? Whatever..as long as i can play lappy. Quickly i enter mommy room and grabs my pinky sony lappy.. I place it on my table.. switch it on.. and i open my Facebook.

Hmm.. only a few notifications i saw.. I click on it and open one by one.. Happy birthday god bless u Christie.. The rest also same.. till I saw a unique greeting from a person..

“From a billion star in the sky.. from a million user in the Facebook.. knowing u at here i called it friendship.. Happy birthday Christie.. Cheers Up Always”.

I got a weird feeling reading this message.. feeling like he knowing me.. cheering me up..

I click on the profile.. huh.. Name cookies monster.. profile picture is a cookies monster.. what? Who this nerd? A blue monster..

I saw cookies monster online.. i click on it and start a conversations.. i feel weird.. i wanna know him.. wanna talk with him.. more..

Me : Hi. R u like cookies so much? CM : hahaha…Yup.. Cookies are nice.. Don you? ME : Ya.. but Christie more love lollipop then cookies.. why u dint put your own picture and name? CM : It is matter.. Should we judge a friend by their picture and name.. If yes..it mean friendship got term and conditions rite..

Such a weird person.. hmm.. i feel warm from every word i read from this person..

Me : What r u doing right now? CM : Nothing.Playing mafia-war.. Doing a trade. and u? Me : Nothing.. Just chat with u.

There is in silent.. i waiting a reply from him..

Me : Cookies Monster… I’m so boring.. CM : Today your birthday.. Din u go out with friend to celebrate.. ME : No.. celebrate with mommy only. Christie don’t have any friend.. CM : Hm.. ok.. No worry.. im your friend at here now.. If u don’t mind friend with cookies monster? U know, I will steal all your cookies.. better u hide it… ME : Hahaha.. Christie don’t mind.. And u can have all the cookies in my home if u know where Christie live. CM : I can smell cookies.. Why u always mention your name in chat instead of using i or me.. ME : It like icon.. So everyone will remember me.. It is rhythm… same like u using the cookies monster name and picture… CM : Great.. I see few pictures of you.. U really enjoying your life.

CM : But…

(CM typing….)

ME : But what?

CM : Hmmm….. All picture got a very nice warm smile..

But.. I see something not rite.. R u really happy?

ME : Huh.. If smiley said Happy.. Do u believe it?

CM : No.. I don’t..

ME : How u know im not in happy lea?

CM : Hmm.. Secret.. Maybe..

ME : Ehh.. Secret and maybe? Mean not a secret la.. Tell smiley how u know?

CM : Hmm.. One day will let u know.. haha

ME : ish.. haha but u don’t know what the thing that smiley sad lea kan?

CM : If I figure it out.. Got reward?

ME : yup.. lollipop..

CM : Ok.. Keep it for me…

ME : Y keep it.. U dint tell me the answer yet…

CM : Oneday..

ME : Hmm..When?

CM : Coming soon…

ME : ok.. smiley will wait..

Who this person.. Seem knowing me a lot.. I slowly open my room door a bit.. Sneak peak my mom.. Nope not mommy.. I thought i was my mom pretending as a cookies monster. OVER THINKING.

CM : U like smiley icon so much ya…

ME : hahaha…. rite.. I like the smiley icon too.. ME : Can SMILEY be Cookies Monster friends? CM : That no need to ask.. We are friends.. There is no term or condition in. Me : Really…? CM : Cross My Heart.. ME : t.. ok already mark a cross. One day i will make a cookies for you.. CM : I will appreciate every single cookies u make for me..

Hmm.. This r monster.. Not like others.. How to say.. Other guy like to say something sweet2. Such like “u so pretty” u so nice” I wanna be ur BF” wanna be my GF” can have ur no’’.. HMMM>.. maybe this blue monster also same,,, maybe this blue monster waiting for a right moment.. err.. scary blue monster.. why u not a doraemon.. also blue but nice…

ME : Can i ask u something? CM : Yes.. Sure u can? ME : How old r u? Where u school? How many brother and sister u have? CM : Wow.. suddenly so many questions.. Im 25years.. I m working at Chemical Laboratory.. I dint have any brother and sister.(Bit complicated to tell u). Anywhere i’m living with my father now and my mom pass-away when im 6 years old.

So pity guy..

ME : :( Sorry.. Feeling sorry for your mommy.. What your activity in kid? Smiley also dont have any brother and sister.. We are same.. CM : Haha.. when i small ah.. I normally destroy a thing.. All electronic stuff i dissemble it and do research.. I destroy, create even play with fire.. shocked by electric.. But most of the time i read comic..Doraemon.. My favorite comics.

ME : Doraemon? I heard it before but never read it.. I thought u like sesame street.. hahaha.. but anyway.. doraemon and cookies monster also in blue.. CM : hm.. yes.. but im not in blue.. hahaha…

I open another browser and click in to youtube and search doraemon.. I saw a title.. Doraemon nobita’s a night before wedding. I click on it.. It a short story.. Around 15 to 20minute story.. I cried watching the stories.. It regarding nobita and doraemon so curious on the nobita wedding days.. Their travel back to future on the of nobita wedding.. But Doraemon and nobita make a mistake and entered a days before his wedding.. Anyhow, their go to see nobita how prepared his wedding.. On the night, shizuka wanna make a decision to cancel the wedding due she feel that her parent will lonely after she married.. But her parents told shizuka.. You already left we a very splendid gift. Priceless. The first gift is your birth. It was early in the morning. When i first time saw you, you was weeping like and angel. I’ve never hear such a wonderful music. When i go out the hospital, sky on the east just begins to became whiter but above the head sky was full of stars. under this wonderful amount of universe dust. I’ve been able to inherit my life in treasure that just are born. It was such wonderful that i couldn’t keep my tears and everyday afterward it was wonderful that you have give me. Some people have ability make you happy with some others u can feel uncomfortable. It is the most important thing in people relationship. I believe nobita certainly can make you happy. Here my eye start tearing.. Suddenly my room door been knocked.. Knock…knock.. Christie…

Huh.. papa voice.. it is pappa.. I ran to the door, open it.. I saw papa in front the door.. Papa..

Papa: Why u crying.. Such silly.. And papa weep my tears by her finger.. Papa : Prepare your self, we going having a dinner together to celebrate your birthday.. Thank papa.. Ops.. Cookies monster are still online.. i click on my facebook and saw the blue dot.. Yeas he are online now.. ME : Can smiley have ur no? i need off now. My pappa bring us to dinner.. CM : 013 8878xxx don’t hesitate to call me when u got a trouble. Enjoy your meal.. Gr8 day to you. ME : Thank you..

What im doing.. I ask a no.. what??? After write down the no.. smiley off the lappy.. Preparing my self to go out.. Oh.. pappa coming back today that why mom so happy.. Im happy too.. Smiley only can with papa few time a years.. Tonight go out to eat.. Normally we eat at home.. Maybe because christie allergic with some of the food..

There around 7pm, Christie, papa and mommy going to the restaurant at sutera Habour. We having a western food.. Im enjoying the meal.. I saw mommy happy face and smile.. Just like smiley smile.. Today is my most happiest day.. Mommy,papa and me.. and my only monster blue friends… Christie hope one days we all four can having a dinner together.. Thanks jesus.. I love u jesus…

I heard papa said to mommy. That after i get my SPM result.. Papa will migrate us to taiwan.. I’m happy, My wish come true. I hate people at here. I hate the way their think, The way their judge, The way their act, The way their….. But…. Suddenly my heart feel weak.. feel sad… feel a piece of my heart left over here.. ( There a pianist at the stage played a song Love not easy from huang xiao hu ).

My blue monster.. if i go.. i won’t able to find him.. I not even know his name.. his person.. suddenly i wanna call him.. to tell him that i not longer at here..

After finish our dinner we get a desert.. But my heart still feel sad.. I mean in moody..

At the night, Laying in my bed.. Hugging my smiley doll.. My heart still feel moody.. feel weak.. My mind lingered all cookies word.. lingered cookies blue monster face with a greedy cookies in a mouth.. Till i fallen in sleep.. On that night smiley have a dream, smiley dream making a cookies for the blue monster..

Hm.. a sunrise shine over my room windows.. Haizz.. i forget to close the curtain.. The sky look so blue today.. Blue monster.. smiley wondering cookie monster already wake up or still in sleep.. Hmm… haizz.. lazy saturday.. I look at the clock and showed 9.30am.. I wake up and wear my bunny slippers.. having a bath.. i saw mommy and papa at kitchen preparing something.. So sweet.. just like lollipop…yum yum….

Smiley switched on lappy.. but smiley dint saw the blue monster online..

Haizzz.. ni zai na ni ah wo de blue monster.. I switched off and having a breakfast with papa and mommy.. My papa play role in praying.. But my heart prayed.. ‘’Good Morning cookies monster.. Hope u enjoyed ur breakfast today and have a nice day”.

Papa.. can i join our school intellect camping on next weeken? Pls daddy.. i really wanna join them.. After a few dicussion with mommy.. My parent let me join the camping.. Yes… i can stay a night out site.. i never been alone outsite.. wanna feel what it could be… After breakfast… we go out having a trip to few places.. But my heart still wondering what the blue monster doing now.. maybe he eating cookies right now.. huh..

10 days passed.. It a day me at school interact camping.. Here is the night, a nite I saw a real monster…

A night where a heavy raining and thunder storm. I starving, cold and scare. Mommy I regard. Im so regard came to this camping. I should listen to you mommy. Should I call mommy. No mommy will nag me. Huh what kind of camping is this. All canned food. Im allergic with it. SOMEONE help me.. No I don’t any friend. Im so alone, I hatted in my class.. nope in school.. I only got mommy at here.. Then I realize that 1 weeks ago, I knew someone.. someone quit different or can called it weird maybe. He not like other person I speak with. Should I call him. I looked at my watch, yay it already eleven eleven. I looked at my contact list in my phone. Well, so poor. Mommy, daddy and Cookies monster. Only three contact list showed. Yes. My heart signal my brain “go..go..go.. call him’’.

Sitting alone in the camp and I decided to call..

CM : Tuttt…Tutt… Hello… (In sleepy sound)

ME : Heloo.. are u cookies monster? (Sound so low and shy)

CM : Yea..Who are u calling me in the midnight here? (With curious tone and a

heavy raining background sound)

ME : Hi.. I’m Christie.. I know you from FB and we chat few week ago. Do u

remember me?

CM : Huh.. Yea.. christie.. Why are u calling me in the middle of night? Are u

alright?

ME : Nope.Im hungry.. can u buy me some food?

CM : Yea..sure.. But where r u now? R u alone? ( with yawning )

ME : I at Sabah XXX and XXXXXX side. We having school camping at here and I

Didn’t take any meal just some junk food. Im hungry and having a gastric now.

CM : Wait me at there. Coming right now.

He mean it or just fallen back in to a sleep. Huh.. well, who got to believe. He may think this is a prank call. He not even know me and we just chat a few time in FB. OH.. my stomach so hurt. Please.. God please save me.. The gastric getting worst.. (With a some drop tear in my eye company with a sound of rain and thunder. My heart feel so alone.. Why God? Why God? Why? Why so many people hate me? Why I don’t have a friends? What purpose u doing me like this? The thunder sound heaver and heaver. Sound like God speak to me. Sound like God answered me in angry mode.. Suddenly… My phone ringtone kill my complaint..

CM : Im nearby.. Ni zhai lai ik bian?

(im stunned, it’s true or im dreaming.)

ME : Christie don’t know where.. Can’t remember how to here..

CM : Wait me… Call u back k..

Few minute after my phone ring again..

CM : I saw a lot of camp just not far from my car.. But I cant drive to there.. Do saw my car lamp?

Me : Wait.. Hm.. ya.. wo kan tau lek…

I hang up the phone.. Then I ran to there.. Oh gosh.. On that time, what im thinking.. I not even think about danger.. I may rape or killed that night.

The rain get heavy and heavy.. Followed with a thunder and strong wind.. I really din feel cold.. I just want to fast go away.. Near the car, The car was red and I cant clearly see inside the car… I ran to the passenger side open the door and jump inside.. I weep my hair and face.. covered with rain.. Im not even looked at CM,, then I hear a voice..

CM : Wo weiyi ni you yi san. (I thought u gat umbrella)

Wei se me nibu jiang? (Why u dint tell me?)

Im stunned a while.. I slowly get up my head and turn to him.. and I saw.. a towel. He put at my head a wipe a bit.. and I wipe my hair.. I still donno how he look like… My heart pounding.. pounding and pounding… and now I slowly have a sneak peak.. Huh.. Not in blue color.. He sure not an alien… He just an ordinary person…. I stunned look at her.. Not a blink of eye..

CM : Sory.. did I bit look like monster?

Then he hand me a tapau.. I open the tapau,hm.. smell good.. Fried rice.. But I dint saw a spoon..

ME : You mei you chi keeng? ( Do u have a spoon?)

CM : Ops.. Wang zin na.. (Forget to request/take)

Then he took the tapau, tear a side of the tapau and hand it to me…

ME : haha.. ziang tu kei yi (Like this also can a)

He just give me a little smile. He take another tapau.. it’s a drinks.. I open it a pt the straw and gave it to me.. He tapau me a milo PING.. PING in the cold night.. hmm.. But I drink it also..

ME : Hau reng oh… Ni yau chek ma.. (Im so cold, do u wanna to eat to)

CM : Ni chek la.. (U eat la)

Then he grab something behind the sit.. Take my tapau put at the dashboard.. And cover me with his sweater.. So sweet.. This monster are sweet.. So I just wear it and continue to eat.. It so silent between us two.. and a song played in his car player.. (mei na me zian dan)After I finish eating.. I request he to sent me back home.. But he denied.. and give me a motivation word.. Ohya and a motivational story I think.. I remember the story in doraemon regarding nobita and dinosaur, Nobita dint give up to pet the dinosaur..

I looked at the monster without a blink, listen all the story.. Sound he like a uncle rite.. sepanjang dia ceritiakan, he dint look at me… He look at the front.. Hmm.. I look at his left face… a face look like a angry face.. like cookies monster.. Ok keep it short.. After ll. He grab a umbrella from behind and hand it to me.. He said take care always.. Our friendship more than tonight.. Im bit blur all the word he said.. I went back to the camp, all nite I sleep covered with cookies monster sweater.. Warm nite.. 2moro morning I get fever, when to the klinik and I stopped the interact camping.. Having a rest at home.. Im dreaming the night in the car.. Such a nice person..

0 notes