#and it's so frustrating to me

[butchfalin]

the funniest meltdown ive ever had was in college when i got so overstimulated that i could Not speak, including over text. one of my friends was trying to talk me through it but i was solely using emojis because they were easier than trying to come up with words so he started using primarily emojis as well just to make things feel balanced. this was not the Most effective strategy... until. he tried to ask me "you okay?" but the way he chose to do that was by sending "👉🏼👌🏼❓" and i was so shocked by suddenly being asked if i was dtf that i was like WHAT???? WHAT DID YOU JUST SAY TO ME?????????? and thus was verbal again

#yeehaw #1k #5k #10k #posts that got cursed. blasted. im making these tag updates after... 19 hours? #also i have been told it should say speech loss bc nonverbal specifically refers to the permanent state. did not know that! #unfortunately i fear it is so far past containment that even if i edited it now it would do very little. but noted for future reference #edit 2: nvm enough ppl have come to rb it from me directly that i changed the wording a bit. hopefully this makes sense #also. in case anyone is curious. though i doubt anyone who is commenting these things will check the original tags #1) my friend did not do this on purpose in any way. it was not intended to distract me or to hit on me. im a lesbian hes a gay man. cmon now #he felt very bad about it afterwards. i thought it was hilarious but it was very embarrassed and apologetic #2) “why didn't he use 🫵🏼?” didn't exist yet. “why didn't he use 🆗?” dunno! we'd been using a lot of hand emojis. 👌🏼 is an ok sign #like it makes sense. it was just a silly mixup. also No i did not invent 👉🏼👌🏼 as a gesture meaning sex. do you live under a rock #3) nonspeaking episodes are a recurring thing in my life and have been since i was born. this is not a quirky one-time thing #it is a pervasive issue that is very frustrating to both myself and the people i am trying to communicate with. in which trying to speak is #extremely distressing and causes very genuine anguish. this post is not me making light of it it's just a funny thing that happened once #it's no different than if i post about a funny thing that happened in conjunction w a physical disability. it's just me talking abt my life #i don't mind character tags tho. those can be entertaining. i don't know what any of you are talking about #Except the ppl who have said this is pego/ryu or wang/xian. those people i understand and respect #if you use it as a writing prompt that's fine but send it to me. i want to see it #aaaand i think that's it. everyday im tempted to turn off rbs on it. it hasn't even been a week

[inkskinned]

at some point it's just like. do they even fucking like the thing they're asking AI to make? "oh we'll just use AI for all the scripts" "we'll just use AI for art" "no worries AI can write this book" "oh, AI could easily design this"

like... it's so clear they've never stood in the middle of an art museum and felt like crying, looking at a piece that somehow cuts into your marrow even though the artist and you are separated by space and time. they've never looked at a poem - once, twice, three times - just because the words feel like a fired gun, something too-close, clanging behind your eyes. they've never gotten to the end of the movie and had to arrive, blinking, back into their body, laughing a little because they were holding their breath without realizing.

"oh AI can mimic style" "AI can mimic emotion" "AI can mimic you and your job is almost gone, kid."

... how do i explain to you - you can make AI that does a perfect job of imitating me. you could disseminate it through the entire world and make so much money, using my works and my ideas and my everything.

and i'd still keep writing.

i don't know there's a word for it. in high school, we become aware that the way we feel about our artform is a cliche - it's like breathing. over and over, artists all feel the same thing. "i write because i need to" and "my music is how i speak" and "i make art because it's either that or i stop existing." it is such a common experience, the violence and immediacy we mean behind it is like breathing to me - comes out like a useless understatement. it's a cliche because we all feel it, not because the experience isn't actually persistent. so many of us have this ... fluttering urgency behind our ribs.

i'm not doing it for the money. for a star on the ground in some city i've never visited. i am doing it because when i was seven i started taking notebooks with me on walks. i am doing it because in second grade i wrote a poem and stood up in front of my whole class to read it out while i shook with nerves. i am doing it because i spent high school scribbling all my feelings down. i am doing it for the 16 year old me and the 18 year old me and the today-me, how we can never put the pen down. you can take me down to a subatomic layer, eviscerate me - and never find the source of it; it is of me. when i was 19 i named this blog inkskinned because i was dramatic and lonely and it felt like the only thing that was actually permanently-true about me was that this is what is inside of me, that the words come up over everything, coat everything, bloom their little twilight arias into every nook and corner and alley

"we're gonna replace you". that is okay. you think that i am writing to fill a space. that someone said JOB OPENING: Writer Needed, and i wrote to answer. you think one raindrop replaces another, and i think they're both just falling. you think art has a place, that is simply arrives on walls when it is needed, that is only ever on demand, perfect, easily requested. you see "audience spending" and "marketability" and "multi-line merch opportunity"

and i see a kid drowning. i am writing to make her a boat. i am writing because what used to be a river raft has long become a fully-rigged ship. i am writing because you can fucking rip this out of my cold dead clammy hands and i will still come back as a ghost and i will still be penning poems about it.

it isn't even love. the word we use the most i think is "passion". devotion, obsession, necessity. my favorite little fact about the magic of artists - "abracadabra" means i create as i speak. we make because it sluices out of us. because we look down and our hands are somehow already busy. because it was the first thing we knew and it is our backbone and heartbreak and everything. because we have given up well-paying jobs and a "real life" and the approval of our parents. we create because - the cliche again. it's like breathing. we create because we must.

you create because you're greedy.

#every time someones like ''AI will replace u" im like. u will have to fucking KILL ME #there is no replacement here bc i am not filling a position. i am just writing #and the writing is what i need to be doing #writeblr #this probably doesn't make sense bc its sooo frustrating i rarely speak it the way i want to #edited for the typo wrote it and then was late to a meeting lol #i love u people who mention my typos genuinely bc i don't always catch them!!!! :) it is doing me a genuine favor!!! #my friend says i should tell you ''thank you beta editors'' but i don't know what that means #i made her promise it isn't a wolf fanfiction thing. so if it IS a wolf thing she is DEAD to me (just kidding i love her) #hey PS PS PS ??? if ur reading this thinking what it's saying is ''i am financially capable of losing this'' ur reading it wrong #i write for free. i always have. i have worked 5-7 jobs at once to make ends meet. #i did not grow up with access or money. i did not grow up with connections or like some kind of excuse #i grew up and worked my fucking ASS OFF. and i STILL!!! wrote!!! on the side!!! because i didn't know how not to!!! #i do not write for money!!!! i write because i fuckken NEED TO #i could be in the fucking desert i could be in the fuckken tundra i could be in total darkness #and i would still be writing pretentious angsty poetry about it #im not in any way saying it's a good thing. i'm not in any way implying that they're NOT tryna kill us #i'm saying. you could take away our jobs and we could go hungry and we could suffer #and from that suffering (if i know us) we'd still fuckin make art. #i would LOVE to be able to make money doing this! i never have been able to. but i don't NEED to. i will find a way to make my life work #even if it means being miserable #but i will not give up this thing. for the whole world.

[dreamerdagn]

my tears of the kingdom experience so far

#catfishchat #totk #things really opened up for me when I realized that any time I was frustrated I could go somewhere else #edit: I do really wish I'd kept the essence of If It Sucks Hit Da Bricks #esp since my point wasn't about warping but the fact that you can leave almost any situation #you can warp you can jump you ascend you can hit da bricks #but I said warp and the pic is of him jumping so Hit Da Bricks didn't make sense #catfish post #loz

[loumands]

I feel like many people have a fundamental misconception of what unreliable narrator means. It's simply a narrative vehicle not a character flaw or a sign that the character is a bad person. There are also many different types of unreliable narrators in fiction. Being an unreliable narrator doesn't necessarily mean that the character is 'wrong', it definitely doesn't mean that they're wrong about everything even if some aspects in their story are inaccurate, and only some unreliable narrators actively and consciously lie. Stories that have unreliable narrators also tend to deal with perception and memory and they often don't even have one objective truth, just different versions. It reflects real life where we know human memory is highly unreliable and vague and people can interpret same events very differently

#the way some people (usually lestat fans lol) talk about louis being an unreliable narrator has frustrated me #i still insist louis' unreliableness is mostly subtle (passing quickly over things he doesn't want to think about #presenting things that factually happened in a way he can build a story that makes sense to him #not knowing what lestat is thinking and feeling so interpreting him differently than lestat himself probably would) #rather than he's telling something that didn't really happen or is under armand's mind control or something #like for example i think it's been made very clear all the abuse really happened they're not gonna suddenly pull the rug from under it #if anything i feel lestat is going to turn out to be even worse than louis perceived him when we hear people who are not in love w him lol #keanu.txt

[tending-the-hearth]

me: making a silly little video about annabeth's progression from making percy a blue birthday cupcake vs. her recognizing is as something sacred between percy and sally and not making blue food

tiktok commenters: um actually that's definitely a plot inconsistency and it shows how little rick pays attention because why would that even be a thing

SHUT UP I'M EXPLODING YOU WITH MY MIND IT'S ABOUT ANNABETH FIRST THINKING IT'S A NONSENSICAL LITTLE THING AND AFTER THEY GET TOGETHER OFFICIALLY PERCY OPENING UP ABOUT THE ABUSE HE AND HIS MOTHER FACED AND HOW THIS ONE SEEMINGLY SILLY THING BECAME THEIR WAY OF REBELLION AND COMMUNICATION DURING DIFFICULT TIMES AND ANNABETH RECOGNIZING THAT AND LOVING PERCY SO MUCH THAT SHE NEVER TOUCHES THE IDEA OF MAKING BLUE FOOD AGAIN BECAUSE SHE KNOWS AS MUCH AS SHE LOVES HIM THAT'S SOMETHING SO SPECIFIC AND IMPORTANT TO PERCY AND SALLY THAT IT WOULDN'T BE RIGHT FOR HER TO BE PART OF THAT

#tiktok fandoms frustrates me so much #like i quite honestly do NOT think it'd be a consistency issue #it's one of those things that shows the progression of percabeth's relationship #percy jackson and the olympians #percy jackson #annabeth chase #percabeth #chalice of the gods

[potassiumprincess]

i think marinette is worse at resting when she's sick but adrien is worse at sitting things out if he's injured. i have no explanation, these are just the vibes

#ml #marinette dupain cheng #adrien agreste #okay i lied i do have justifications #adrien probably just. would love being taken care of if he's sick #it's maybe something his mom used to do but not ENOUGH #and marinette would absolutely spoil him #but marinette is all I AM FINE IT IS JUST A COLD I AM FINE meanwhile she nearly falls off a rooftop in a dizzy spell #but adrien hate being kept away from ppl he loves. hates not being able to protect them. and an injury is more long-term and isolating #meanwhile...idk marinette feels to me like an injurt would leave her more defeated. she'd feel like she failed somehow #like she is SUPPOSED to be ladybug she is SUPPOSED to keep herself together to keep the city safe #so i think that would take a lot of her energy she'd be frustrated about it yes but also sort of...admit defeat #adrien would find ways to cheer her up though 🥺

[a-polite-melody]

Considering that there’s another post going around that lands on this conclusion, I think it deserves its own succinct post:

When transmascs share instances of positivity to remind each other that the way we are treated isn’t all bad, it’s then used as proof of the whole of transmasc experiences being this way, and that transmascs are not oppressed as a whole.

When transmascs share instances of harm done to transmascs to raise awareness that transmascs are harmed directly within our societies, it’s used as proof that we are taking up too much room in conversations because the harm we face “isn’t bad enough”.

When transmascs share instances of outright murder of members of our community to show that no, transmasc issues are not somehow “lesser” because “we aren’t dying” because we are dying, it’s used as proof that we are trauma dumping and trying to make other people feel sorry for us—look at these AFABs being whiny and hysterical and trying to portray themselves as victims. Or that it isn’t specific enough to us so we should shut up and let other people speak for us.

Transmascs cannot speak about our experiences without being touted as an example of why transmascs as a whole should shut up.

This is erasure.

#my post #noooo I didn’t just make this post because I don’t want to interact with that other post because of personal hangups that no one else #should have about the post. truly it’s entirely a Me and My Personal Situation thing #the post is fine #I just was a little frustrated about how much I wanted to reblog and also like #not interact with it at all at the same time #so I made this post #shhhhh #transandrophobia #transmisandry #anti-transmasculinity #erasure through silencing

[the-rainbow-of-doom]

(This post was sponsored by a 1+ hour commute)

#I'm so frustrated how little time and energy i have after a day is done #i didn't win the fight against depression to have lofe ruined by THAT now #lacking time and energy to go on job hunt.. it's all very small steps only #a part time job would be marvellous but what flat can be paid with that #maybe also my anxiety is stopping me from getting a new job. what if i get fired. what if it's horrible there. ahh.. i need more courage #mine capitalism #anti-capitalism #work

[andxisha]

#memedaddy #funny memes #memes #meirl #funny #relatable #best memes #relatable memes #annoying #so frustrating #meme #funny shit #me irl #me irl rn

[999999999inadream]

toby fox needs to add like a bit of narration in deltarune abt kris like "they themmed they/themily down the stheirs" cus i cant go on seeing them constantly get he/himmed in yt comment sections

#this is my punishment for actually looking at yt comments isnt it #deltarune #kris dreemurr #maybe im looking too much into things but... #it also feels sorta. misogynistic when ppl default to he/him for androgynous/non binary characters #like ive seen multiple ppl use “well its understandable that ppl assume kris is a he when they have such masculine behaviours/hobbies” #the masculine behaviours and hobbies in question are being a prankster #i shit you not #like they called pranking... masc?? huh #can girls and others not get their silly on anymore?? #also like i said before with the exception of like frisk and chara like almost every nb character is masculinised #like napstablook monster kid #god there has to be more but my memory is shit atm and i also have to go eat dinner #but i wanna talk more abt like why it feels so misogynistic to me #i thinnk it has to do with the fact that defaulting to he/him just makes women feel like an afterthought. ig like unless its confirmed then #they must be a guy to be relevant or smth #and also like how much they gender entirely non gender specific things (see: pranking) #ofc it wouldnt be BETTER per se if they imagined these characters as girls but its smth ive noticed and i just get frustrated cus #it feels sexist but i cant FULLY articulate why #i feel like i had the answer a lil while ago but i forgot #i might come back to this who knows #wow ok rant over #for now

[squuote]

this was meant for an ask my friend sent about what if stanley wasn't actually stanley's name but tumblr DELETED IT and now i am pissed take this comic from my hands NEOW

#the stanley parable #the stanley parable ultra deluxe #tspud #tsp #crows art #GUUUUUHHHHH #THE ASK WAS STILL THERE YESTERDAY WHAT THE FUCK!!!!!!!!!! #<- not actually super angry but!!!!!! frustrating!!!!!!! #anyway it was a silly fun ask and i loved it a lot >:-( so i drew a comic #just took me forever to actually get to #but here it is. in the flesh #now i am gonna go angrily drink ginger beer

[meru90]

𓍢ִ໋🧜‍♂️

#ignore the ugly bg and anatomy it got me so frustrated i started to use the liquify tool vhdsghjb #haikaveh #genshin impact #kaveh #al haitham #kaveh genshin #al haitham genshin #fanart #kavehtham

[becca-e-barnes]

all i can think about is bucky literally BEGGING to eat your pussy. just on his knees, calling himself a needy slut, just looking up at you with puppy dog eyes while he just begs for your pussy on his mouth. ugh.

Men who are this into eating pussy have a special place reserved for them in Heaven. Hearing someone beg to go down on you is life changing when they know what they're doing 🙈

But you're so right, Bucky would be so willing to degrade himself like that just to be allowed to go down on you. He'd be on his knees, trying to ignore how full his balls feel, begging for you.

"P-please." His voice is so quiet you almost start to question if he said it intentionally. "I need to taste you. I can't think about anything else."

His cock twitches despite how heavy it looks, flushed and angry against the pale skin of his thighs.

"Really?" You tease, tilting his chin up with two fingers so he's looking at your face, rather than your body. "Tell me exactly what you're thinking. Describe it to me"

He doesn't miss a beat. "I'm thinking about how soft you are, how warm and silky your cunt feels under my tongue. I'm thinking about burying my tongue as deep inside you as I can reach and still wishing I could get deeper. I want to feel how wet you are but more than anything, I want to taste how wet you are. I want to dream about it for the rest of the week. Every time I stroke my cock I want to be able to remember how you taste."

Precum drips from his tip and you're not sure you can deny him much longer. Not when he's making it sound so appealing.

"Do you even hear yourself?" You do your very best to act like you don't love the sound of every word that has just come out of his mouth.

"I do. I sound like a shameless, filthy, desperate slut. The type of slut who wants to kiss and lick and worship your sweet pussy until you're so sensitive you have to force me to stop." His hand wanders between his own legs, tugging his stiff length to the mere thought.

He's not above begging and you know that. He'll draw this out as long as he needs to until he gets his way but there's very little sense in that when you want this just as much as he does.

"Lie on the bed." You give him time to make his way over before following, lining yourself up just above his face.

You take a second to smooth his hair, enjoying the feeling of his freshly shaved face against the sensitive insides of your thighs.

He's looking up at you, your eyes meeting his. "Thank you." The relief in his voice is clear right before he grasps your hips and pulls you down onto his mouth.

Fuck, he's incredible. This is the mouth you dream about when you're alone. His tongue massages your clit, stroking back and forth before dipping into your fluttering entrance. You swear he must feel what he's doing to you. You feel your cunt clenching and rippling, your muscles contracting in response to the pleasure and for a second you wonder if he can tell.

He's hungry for this; he has been for hours. He's moaning and slurping obscenely, his tongue buried in your cunt. You don't even need to look over your shoulder to know that he's alternating between fucking his own fist and gripping the base of his shaft tight enough to stop him from spilling his release all over himself too soon.

It's very hard to tell which of you enjoys this more.

#asks answered <3 #becca writes spice #anon #needy!bucky #bucky barnes x reader smut #sub!bucky #bucky barnes smut #subby!bucky #this should technically belong to the shs series #but it fit this prompt too well so I'm using it here #I make the rules 😇 #but that 'thank you' nearly killed me #I've noticed this week that my beige flag is that I get so frustrated when people make assumptions about my capacity #I hate when people say stuff like 'how's the new job? you must be really stressed' #or worse 'things must be getting on top of you' #like ??? #why would you assume I can't handle what I put on my own plate? #I know people mean well but it really bothers me

[toomanywordsnllines]

Sometimes... the world can be a little too much.

#cod #call of duty #cod mw2 #call of duty modern warfare 2 #call of duty ghost #simon ghost riley #manysart #manyrambles #vent in the tags beware #drew a little ghost to see if it made me feel a little better and it did... maginarly... #I have been having the roughest month (roughest year reallly) of my life mental wise... #I feel so drained everything is too much everything is too little #it's like my brain is covered in static and not the good kind #I'm exausted mentally #my nerves feel rubbed raw #feels like I'm so close to snapping #I don't even know why I'm like this that's why it's so frustrating #now I'm gonna work on my assigment that does involve soap so that makes me a little happy #personal stuff yee haw

[phoenixyfriend]

Political ads: My opponent has jacked up taxes every year since he was elected!

Me: Which taxes? Income? Sales? Property? Business?

Political ads: I promise to hold the line on taxes!

Me: Which taxes? What government programs do those taxes contribute to? What gets cut if the lack of taxation causes a deficit?

Political ads: Think about the taxes!

Me: WHICH TAXES. WHICH TAXES ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT. TELL ME WHO'S ACTUALLY GETTING AFFECTED BY THESE TAXES YOU'RE SO CONCERNED WITH.

Reminder to always ask what it is that people aren't saying in these ads.

A lot of them want you to think that it is your personal taxes as a working-class person that they're talking about. But if it's taxes on the rich that they're "holding the line on," then they're using your desire to survive with a greater portion of your own income as fuel to keep the upper classes from paying their fair share.

I keep getting the same three or four political ads (half aren't even for the district I live in) and I'm frustrated that they use these transparent tactics and that there are probably people that don't have the time or background to take that moment to go 'what are they hoping I hear in this? What are they actually going to do?'

#Phoenix Talks #personal #vent post #feel free to reblog #politics #taxes #the last time I got one particular ad I started shouting at the TV while my sister was downstairs grabbing some food #she didn't even blink about it so I guess it's not out of character for me lol #We're alone (except for the dog) and I was hoping to share my frustration by shouting while she's in the next room #so at least one person would Know my feelings on this topic

[milksteakkk]

"noah and alejandro look like brothers"

#ive seen people say this alot #especially under alenoah posts which really irritates me #and it frustrates me so much so i made this lol #alejandro burromuerto #total drama #alejandro total drama #noah total drama #alenoah