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#and it's not just because you sent this or the other thing i just think you're pretty neat šŸ˜©
norrizzandpia Ā· 1 day
Note
this might have to be more than one part, but can you please write a wrong number lando fic? like lando texts the wrong number somehow and they end up becoming good friends, they start falling for each other but lando lies about his identity the whole time until they meet or he tells the reader. and sheā€™s pissed and she doesnā€™t know anything about f1 anyways so she doesnā€™t understand why he lied. with angst and stuff? idk if this is too specific or too much to ask!
Wrong Number, Right Person (LN4)
Summary: A wrong number leads Lando right to Y/n, but even the beautiful love they find together struggles to stand a chance against Landoā€™s lie of identity.
Warnings: none, BUT A HAPPY ENDING!!! Y/nā€™s bsf threatens to kill lando lol
Note: she is LONG! The word count is almost 9k oml but i have to say that @piastrification was a major help in making this because she read it for me and made it read less stupid! She also gave me some ideas so credit to her for that xx
If there was any moment where Y/n was beyond confused with absolutely no inkling of an answer, it was now. She stared down at her phone, clutching the device as she read over the message sitting on her Lock Screen over and over.
ā€œWhatā€™s wrong?ā€ Her best friend, Annie, asked. Her eyebrows were scrunched together in a way she had always done since they were kids, Y/n loved the way that had never changed. The two women had experienced so much growth over the years, but it was heartwarming to see some things hadnā€™t.
Her eyes flickered to Annie before turning her phone around, ā€œWhy does this person think Iā€™m supposed to be meeting them in half an hour?ā€
Annie laughed out loud, taking the phone from the other girlā€™s hands and typing out a reply, ā€œSeems like this poor person has the wrong number.ā€
When Y/nā€™s phone is returned to her grasp, she giggles at what Annie had done.
Unknown Number
Hey! Just letting you know Iā€™ll be there in thirty minutes. Hope you arenā€™t running late like last timeā€¦
Y/n
Uh, Iā€™m actually running really behind schedule. I wonā€™t be able to get there until around three hours from now. Sorry.
The two girls continued their lunch, feeling a bit bad about messing with a strangerā€™s plans but laughing nonetheless. It wasn't until Y/nā€™s phone started blowing up that the color began to drain from their faces.
Unknown Number
WHAT? THREE HOURS????? WHAT?
Unknown Number
YOUā€™RE MESSING WITH ME RN
Unknown Number
If you donā€™t answer me in .5 seconds, I WILL show up to your house and wreck your shit
Unknown Number
LIKE WHAT? THREE HOURS? WEā€™VE HAD THESE PLANS FOR WEEKS MATE
Unknown Number
Literally answer me rn or Iā€™m telling Oscar to help me plan your murder
Y/nā€™s hand clasped over her mouth as she frantically began to type out a reply, guilt settling over the amusement.
Y/n
You most definitely have the wrong number. Sorry, me and my friend thought it would be funny to tell you that your plans were basically ruined. Our bad. But, I have no idea who Oscar is and I pray for the person you are meaning to text rn. Plz donā€™t wreck their shit!
His response was immediate.
Unknown Number
Ohā€¦ sorry for my small outburst then. But, how am I meant to know this isnā€™t actually the person Iā€™m trying to get a hold of?
Y/n laughed before Annie suggested taking a picture and sending it to the mysterious number. Probably stupid considering they had no idea who was on the other side of the phone, but an image was sent regardless.
Y/n
*Image Attached*
Y/n
I am most definitely not whoever you are trying to get a hold of.
The number doesnā€™t respond for a few minutes, busy for all they know or getting bored of texting a supposed stranger. However, her phone dings on the table and the two girls peek to see the response.
Unknown Number
Woah, you are for sure not who I am meant to be texting right now.
Unknown Number
You are very pretty tho
Y/n giggled,
Y/n
Thank you, but not thank you if you are an old man or serial killer. I donā€™t take compliments from psychos.
Unknown Number
Haha no I am not an old man or serial killer. Iā€™m a child in a 24 year old manā€™s body.
Y/n
How do I know this for sure?
Unknown Number
Trust me?
Y/n
Okay, ig. Whatā€™s your name?
The food comes to the table and Annie begins to dig in, watching her best friend closely before the girl puts her phone down.
ā€œHe stopped responding. I asked for his name. Probably got scared or something.ā€ She murmurs before cutting into her chicken. Annie nods her head side to side before they take up another topic of conversation, seemingly moving on from the previous random male who had interrupted their lunch.
However, thereā€™s another vibration on the table ten minutes later. Y/n picks up her phone.
Unknown Number
Robert :) But, people call me Bob. Whatā€™s yours?
Y/n
I am going against everything my parents ever taught me by telling a stranger my name and what I look likeā€¦ but Iā€™m Y/n :)
Y/n
Btw bob sounds like a fake name thatā€™s so funny
šŸŽļø
The next day, Y/n wakes up to yet another message from Bob- who had begun to take up the majority of her text notificationsā€™ real estate. She didnā€™t mind in the slightest, though. They got on like a house on fire, banter, jokes and conversation free-flowing at any given time.
Bob!
Good morning :)
Bob!
Wait, is it morning for you? Where do you even live?
Y/n
Okay, stalker. Itā€™s literally 9 am, why am I already having to deal with a man trying to get my address.
Bob!
GIRL WHAT? That isnā€™t what i meant and you know it, Y/n
Y/n
Yes, i know what you meant, bob. Iā€™m just joking lol
Y/n
I live in London! What about you?
Bob!
Monaco
Y/n
Shit, girl. Youā€™re rich asf?
Bob!
NO nah nah nah. Y/n, I literally work as a server here. I enjoy the glamor tho
Y/n
Ohā€¦ so no diamond necklaces :( You couldā€™ve been my sugar daddy, bob.
Bob!
šŸ˜­
Y/n
No i joke I JOKE i can buy my own damn diamond necklaces
Bob!
Of course you can, Y/n. Iā€™m not surprised.
Her heart warms at his portrayed support, and even though her bank account is in the negative, she likes to think Bob believes in her just as Annie does. Maybe he actually did.
She shakes her head at her thoughts. Iā€™ve known him for a day, she thinks. He shouldnā€™t already mean this much to her. She doesnā€™t even know him.
Y/n
Ty, bob :) I have to go though. I have so much to get done today.
Bob!
Ok! text me when youā€™re free?
Y/n
yesss
ā€”
There is a small void in Y/nā€™s body as she unlocks the front door of her apartment. A day of being broken down has taken its toll on her. Usually, it doesnā€™t get to her, the stress and pressure of it all, but today, as she flops down onto her ratty couch, part of her wants to give up.
Her phone buzzes underneath her leg.
Bob!
Are you free yet?? Itā€™s been all day, y/n!!!
Y/n
sry, i just got home.
Bob!
Just now? Didnā€™t you leave at like 9:30 this morn??
Y/n
yeah
Bob!
Y/n, its 10:45 at night for you
Y/n
that would be correctā€¦ how did you know that?? Tracking my time zone, Robert?
Bob!
you might be scared to hear I have London saved on my world clock so I can see it at all times
Y/n
thats love fr
Y/n
but yeah its been a long day
Bob!
oh, well, im sorry :( how are you? Tired?
Y/n
Yeah, definitely. Just a hard day in general.
Bob!
Talk to me about it then <3
Her face blushes before the color is being forced back beneath her face. She doesnā€™t know this man enough to tell him all her sorrows. Heā€™s just being nice.
Y/n
itā€™s ok. Thank you tho bob
Bob!
Who else are you planning to talk to abt it then?
Y/n
no one?
Bob!
you need to talk about it y/n to let it go. Talk to me.
Y/n
We barely know each other.
Bob!
Do i look like i care?
She laughs and types,
Y/n
Bob, I donā€™t even know what you look like
Bob!
Weā€™ll fix that someday :) Now talk to me about everything
Y/n takes a breath before her fingers begin flying across the keyboard.
Y/n
People are just mean. I try so hard everyday to give my all and my best effort, to not let people down, but I seem to still do it. I canā€™t quite get things right and my boss is suffocating me with the way he looms over me like I can't hold my own. It makes me think I can't. Thereā€™s no room for mistakes or excuses, you have to be perfect in the office i work and i will never be that. Thereā€™s this other girl who holds my same position yet she does it so much better. I will never hold a candle to her and I know that. Sheā€™s everything I want to be because she accomplishes everything I can't. My boss knows it, everyone knows it, and it makes me feel like an outsider. I canā€™t share certain memories with these people or fit in quite right because I haven't been able to achieve the same success as they have. I know Iā€™m just starting out and I have the rest of my life to surpass them, but what if I can't? What if I am never able to gain a good understanding and I am constantly behind?
There are tears pooling in her eyes as she relives the moments of her day when certain tasks were given to this girl she envies, Sam, while her boss gave her a look that had her close to quitting on the spot. Sam gets to revel in the future while Y/n stays in terror of it. A career path she has wanted all her life taunting her.
Bob!
I can relate to that. I can understand the feeling of seeing everyone around you get something you want so dearly while you share the same tools they do and yet you still come up empty. But Iā€™ve also learned that good things come with time and we canā€™t always be yearning for something that isnā€™t meant to happen right now. Whatā€™s meant to happen will happen for you, Iā€™m sure of it, Y/n. I know itā€™s hard to not be jealous or feel inadequate, but you just have to make peace with the fact that you try your best and thatā€™s enough. Youā€™re a good person, Y/n. All the good will come to you.
Thereā€™s something in his words that makes her feel heard and for once, Y/n finds peace in anotherā€™s reassurance. She doesnā€™t want to think about what that means toward who Bob is to her.
Y/n
Thank you. That means a lot.
Bob!
Of course. I wish I wouldā€™ve had someone telling me that when I was experiencing it.
Y/n
When were you experiencing it?
Bob!
A few years ago. But, that doesnā€™t matter.
Y/n
Youā€™re always vague, bob. Give me something please? Iā€™ve told you so much.
Bob!
Thereā€™s not much to tell, Y/n.
Y/n
Youā€™re a server. Is that something you want to do for the rest of your life?
Bob!
I donā€™t know. Iā€™m still figuring it out.
Y/n
VAGUE
Bob!
Ok, okkk!! I donā€™t want to be a server for the rest of my life. I think Iā€™d like to work in Formula One. Iā€™ve always loved racing and cars, the thrill of speed and all that. Trying to be Max Verstappen fs
Her eyes twinkle,
Y/n
Haha yeah right brotha
Y/n
Thatā€™s great tho! I think youā€™d be great in Formula One, Bob. Iā€™ve heard of it but not a huge fan. It seems boring.
Bob!
Damn, shitting on my favorite thingā€¦ but thank you, Y/n. I think Iā€™d be great too.
Y/n
You know i didnā€™t mean it that way!! What about your family?
Bob!
If youā€™re gonna ask me all these questions, should we just call?? Might be easier haha
She stares at his text for a moment, only a few seconds, before his contact name is large on her screen as his call awaits her answer. She clicks the green button and puts the phone to her ear, suddenly nervous to hear his voice for the first time.
ā€œY/n?ā€ His deep, husky tone fills her ears and the truth of his identity begins to genuinely reign true. His voice is none of some old, slimy man. She could see it fitting someone younger, handsome even. Part of her even wants to say he sounds familiar.
She breathes, ā€œBob?ā€
Thereā€™s a silence that passes between them, a line crossed in the random relationship theyā€™d surprisingly developed. Rustling sounds from Bobā€™s end, sheets moving before Y/n adds to the commotion, her heels falling to the floor once she pushes them off.
ā€œAre you going to ask me about my family?ā€ He asks, a hint of laughter in his voice.
Y/n giggles, ā€œTell me about your family, Bob.ā€
He lets out a small noise of confirmation, ā€œWell, I have two sisters and a brother. A mom and dad. Still married. I donā€™t know, what do you want to know?ā€
The two laugh together at his sudden loss of words before Y/n speaks, ā€œUh, tell me about your parents. Any crazy love stories in the family?ā€
ā€œNo, they got together relatively normal. Theyā€™ve been together since they were younger and theyā€™re still in love to this day. They set up a great example for me.ā€
Y/n rises from her couch, putting Bob on speaker, and moving into her bedroom to get ready for the end of the night. His voice echoes off the walls of the glistening white walls of her bathroom as she asks him more questions about his siblings and relatives. The way he speaks so highly of them makes the pull to him she feels stronger. Something about him seems too good to be true, but she wouldnā€™t say that out loud. She believes too much in the power of a jinx.
Bob somehow changes the conversation to her, asking her further about her job and her worries. Itā€™s scary how easy it feels to open up to him, things she had a hard time even telling Annie. Maybe itā€™s the anonymity of him, the elusiveness of the man she truly doesnā€™t know. However, none of that matters wholly as she lays in bed, eyes trained on the fan above going in circles as she talks about insecurities sheā€™s had since she was a kid.
ā€œItā€™s hard to know what traits you truly hold, you know? I can be the sweetest to one person, but horribly mean to another. I donā€™t want people to think Iā€™m armed with ill intent. Sometimes things just donā€™t come out the way I want.ā€ She whispers, arms sitting heavy over her stomach.
Bob sighs, ā€œItā€™s scary how much we share in common. Iā€™ve felt that way too many times before. You can never be too careful with your words and it just hits so hard when people donā€™t understand who you truly are at your core. If they did, they wouldnā€™t think I was saying something with malice.ā€
She smiles to herself. Itā€™s as if he lives in her head. ā€œI donā€™t think youā€™d mean anything malicious, Bob.ā€
He chuckles, ā€œI donā€™t think youā€™d mean anything malicious either, Y/n.ā€
The quietness of her name on his lips brings her closer to sleep and itā€™s the way he begins to ramble about how much he loves to talk to her that sends her over the edge, a warmness accompanying her body to sleep.
Bob keeps talking for a few minutes before her silence is deafening and he realizes whatā€™s happened. Still, he talks, traumas and all, because something about knowing sheā€™s there makes him not want to hang up.
šŸŽļø
ā€œSo, youā€™ve been talking to this guy for how long?ā€ Annie questions, her eyebrows pulled together just as they always have while she stares bewilderedly at Y/n.
ā€œThree weeks,ā€ She replies, a message from Bob appearing on her screen just as they utter his name.
Annie stares at her, ā€œAnd you donā€™t know what he looks like?ā€
Y/n shakes her head lightly, ā€œNoā€¦ā€
Annie scoffs, ā€œY/n! Thatā€™s so stupid! He could be stalking you for all we know!ā€
ā€œNo! Heā€™s not stalking me, Annie. I think I know him now, really. In the beginning, no, but we call all the time and we talk about anything and everything. Heā€™s sweet and heā€™s everything Iā€™ve ever been looking for in a guy.ā€ Y/n is quick to defend, her phone in her hands as Bob calls her.
Annie glances down to the ringing phone, ā€œIs that him?ā€
Her challenging look makes Y/n nod slowly. Annie lurches forward and Y/n yelps just as her best friend yanks the phone out of her hands and answers the call.
ā€œANNIE!ā€ Y/n yells, grasping for the phone while Annie just moves away.
Bobā€™s voice meets Annieā€™s ears, ā€œY/n?ā€
ā€œThis is Annie, Y/nā€™s best friend. Iā€™d like to know your address and full name, seeing as my beloved friend has not gotten that information yet.ā€ She demands, eyes glancing toward Y/n as she awaits the manā€™s answer.
Bob stutters, ā€œUh, my name is Robert Dancing. I live in Monaco.ā€
Annie shakes her head, ā€œNo, Iā€™m talking address. Like, 12345 Hemingway Street.ā€
Bob laughs, ā€œCan I just talk to Y/n?ā€ Thereā€™s a hint of anxiousness in his voice that sends Annie into a manic spiral.
ā€œNo, tell me where you live.ā€ She fires back.
ā€œAnnie!ā€ Y/n tries again, grabbing onto Annieā€™s sweatshirt to pull her closer. When sheā€™s within reach, Y/n reaches for the phone and snatches it back, much to Annieā€™s dismay.
Y/n apologizes, ā€œBob, Iā€™m so sorry. Annieā€™s a little insane.ā€
He laughs and it lingers around her heart, ā€œItā€™s okay. Just call me later, yeah?ā€
She nods and murmurs confirmation before hanging up. She turns to look at her best friend, a rare moment of betrayal. ā€œWhy would you do that?ā€ She asks, annoyance radiating off of her.
Annie crosses her arms, ā€œBecause, Y/n! You donā€™t know this man.ā€
Y/n groans, ā€œYes, I do! Also, getting to know him by demanding his address seems satisfactory to you?ā€
ā€œYouā€™re being stupid, Y/n! Iā€™m just looking out for you!ā€ She raises her voice, anger getting in the way of truly getting her point across.
Y/n shakes her head, ā€œLooking out for me would be trusting me when I ask that of you! You just completely went against everything I asked of you! I asked for support, not outraged behavior!ā€
Annieā€™s face drops, ā€œYou donā€™t get it! Y/n, you do not know this man! You didnā€™t even know his last name until I asked for you yet youā€™ve apparently told him all of your secrets?!ā€
Y/n begins to pack her purse in a moment of fury, ā€œNo, Annie, you donā€™t get it!ā€
As she stands at the cusp of the front door, Annie yells back at her, ā€œStop falling in love with someone you canā€™t trust!ā€
Y/n closes the door shut, a huff coming from her lips as she storms down the stairs, tears down her face. To have her best friend question her judgment regarding someone who means so much to her hurts immensely. Though, what hurts worse is knowing she might be right.
ā€”
Max almost looks perplexed when Lando hangs up the phone.
ā€œRobert Dancing? What the hell kind of name is that?ā€ He teases, a patronizing tone.
Lando shakes his head, ā€œI didnā€™t know what else to say! Dancing was the first thing that came to my head!ā€
Max crosses his arms over his chest, ā€œAre you ever planning on telling this woman who you really are?ā€
Landoā€™s mouth opens and falls closed, at a loss for words, ā€œI donā€™t know. I want to, but I know sheā€™ll run. I donā€™t blame her. Iā€™ve lied about fundamental things.ā€ Thereā€™s a crease in his forehead as he continues, ā€œI canā€™t lose her. Iā€™m too addicted to the way she makes me feel.ā€
Max sighs, ā€œI hate to say it, but you might, Lan. You told her you were a completely different person, betrayed her trust in an insane way. Youā€™ve got something special, that counts for something, but you need to be prepared for the possibility of her never being able to find it in herself to forgive you. I donā€™t want you to get your hopes up and get hurt.ā€
ā€œI wonā€™t. I know the risks of what Iā€™ve done, but I canā€™t take it back now. I just need to find the time to tell her. I will tell her and Iā€™ll do it in a coherent, calm way.ā€ He tries, but the two of them know heā€™s already gotten his hopes up. Max looks at him with faux confidence, knowing Landoā€™s found himself with someone itā€™ll cut deep to let go of.
Lando knows it too, knows the kind of pain thatā€™ll shred through him if she leaves because of his mistake. Itā€™s ironic in the way that a lie, one so unnecessary, is the thing that plagues his mind at night even as Y/nā€™s voice puts him to sleep.
šŸŽļø
Thereā€™s a nagging in Y/nā€™s brain that pushes her to get out from under the covers of her bed and find her desk in the dark of the night. She sits in the chair with a creak before opening her laptop and the random browser sheā€™s had tabs open in for days on end.
Her fingers however over the keys before typing in a dreaded question of truth.
ā€œRobert Dancing.ā€ She whispers as she presses enter and the screen begins to load. Her stomach churns and her eyes whip away, too scared to look. What would she do if nothing came up? What if Annie was right? What if Bob wasnā€™t who she thought he was after all?
But, then, his voice calls her back to the safety of her blind trust as it rings throughout her brain. He seems too nice to be what Annie had thought him to be. Bob is who she thinks he is, he has to be.
Her gaze takes one more look at the picture of her and Annie on her nightstand before she turns her head fully to find out her fate.
A blank screen with the haunting words, ā€œSorry, we couldnā€™t find what you were looking for.ā€ stares back at her. For a moment, she thinks she mustā€™ve spelled his name wrong and she tries multiple, very clearly wrong, versions of what his name could be in an attempt to console the last of hope dwindling out of her body.
Bob. A name in her mouth that now means nothing takes on what she had originally thought it had been. A fake name.
This canā€™t be, she thinks. There has to be some logical explanation. But, then again, Robert Dancing is not a typical name, something should come up for a server who lives in Monaco. A link to his social media wouldā€™ve shown. Heā€™s young and living in Europe, there would be a trace of him.
Robert Dancing does not exist.
šŸŽļø
Unknown
Y/n, you never called me back. Is everything okay?
Y/n
Everything is fine.
Unknown
Can I call you now?
Y/n
Iā€™m busy.
Unknown
Itā€™s been three days and I havenā€™t heard from you at all. Seriously, are you okay?
Unknown
Y/n, answer me. Whatā€™s going on?
Y/n
Stop messaging me.
Her body jolts in surprise when her phone rings aggressively against the desk at her work. She looks around sheepishly at her staring coworkers before grabbing the loud device and walking outside. The moment the door shuts behind her, she answers.
Bob speaks so quickly, ā€œY/n, whatā€™s going on?ā€
She stares at the skyline, trying to find peace in the view, ā€œWhatā€™s your name?ā€
Bob is quiet, ā€œRobert Dancing. You know this.ā€
ā€œNo, I donā€™t. Whatā€™s your name?ā€ She tries again, anger in her voice and sadness deep in her soul.
ā€œBob.ā€ He states, breaking her heart once more.
Y/n scoffs, ā€œI know thatā€™s not your name. If you donā€™t start telling me the truth right now, I will hang up and block you.ā€
A door closes on his side and she hears him take a breath, ā€œOkay, okay. Donā€™t do that. Howā€™d you find out?ā€
A dry laugh leaves her mouth, mixed with astonishment, ā€œDo you think Iā€™m stupid?! You gave me what was supposed to be your full name, so I searched you up. Choose a name that actually comes up next time, yeah?ā€
ā€œY/n, Iā€™m so sorry. You told me you would never think I meant malice by my actions. That should apply here.ā€ He tries, but she just shakes her head.
ā€œThat was back when I thought I knew at least your name. Who ever are you? Do you even live in Monaco? Was any of it true?ā€ She cries, somewhat surprised at the tears that have appeared.
He sounds disappointed, ā€œYes, it all was. I do live in Monaco and I have three other siblings. My parents are still married. All the things I told you were true, my doubts and insecurities. That wasnā€™t fake, Y/n.ā€
She pulls herself together, not ready to break down for a man so cruel, and wipes her tears, ā€œWhatā€™s your name?ā€
ā€œY/n, I-ā€
She interrupts, determined, ā€œWhatā€™s your name?ā€
A build up manifests from the silence he lets go on before he answers her dying question, ā€œLando Norris.ā€
Part of her was expecting him to say a name she wouldā€™ve recognized, but no part of her has any reaction to him. His name is just another one she wished to have been able to connect to another human being.
He takes her silence for realization and his body slumps against the wall behind him. Part of him knows she wonā€™t, but another part worries sheā€™ll take their situation and everything heā€™s told her to the press.
What she says next completely contradicts everything he built up in his head, ā€œYou act like thatā€™s supposed to mean anything to me.ā€
With that, she hangs up the phone.
ā€”
Annie and Y/n havenā€™t spoken since their fight a week ago, but the betrayal of it is pushed aside when Annie opens the door to find Y/n crying at her door.
No words are shared, Annie understands, and Y/n is ushered into the home, coaxed by her best friend to sit on the couch.
ā€œWhat happened?ā€ She whispers, her hand rubbing over Y/nā€™s back. Annie hates to see her best friend in such brokenness, even in a moment where she could tell her I told you so. That would do no one good, Annie knows that. Y/n doesnā€™t need to be proven wrong right now, she needs someone to sit with her when no one else seemingly wonā€™t.
A sharp intake of breath and Y/n speaks, ā€œHe wasnā€™t who he said he was. Robert Dancing doesnā€™t exist. His actual name is Lando Norris. As if that means anything. Why would he lie?ā€
Annie cocks her head because it doesnā€™t make sense. Why would he lie? Lying about your life to make it seem more interesting than it was would make sense, but to blatantly lie completely about your identity? That didnā€™t make sense.
ā€œHave you searched him up? Maybe itā€™s supposed to mean something?ā€ She tries, genuinely lost at the situation.
Y/n shakes her head, tears falling to her lap as she hangs her head, ā€œIf I do and I see him, I donā€™t want to know. I already like him too much and that makes this hurt more than it should. If I see him, learn who he truly is, Iā€™m scared Iā€™ll never be able to let him go.ā€
Annie frowns, part of her wants to know about the man that put her friend in such a state. But, itā€™s not what Y/n needs as she cries on the beige couch. Her head fits in the crook of Annieā€™s shoulder as the girl turns on mindless TV for her friend.
Still, though, Annie knew she would find herself investigating Lando Norris later when Y/n fell asleep.
ā€”
Itā€™s ironic how similar Y/n and Annie look when they scour the internet for information about a specific man. Annie has a bit of blanket pulled over her lap as Y/n hogs the majority of it, the rise and fall of her chest a telltale sign of needed slumber.
The face of Lando Norris stares back at her as she tries to think of this man calling her best friend at night, asking questions no one has before. He seemed bubbly in the few moments she spoke to him and when she clicks on a video of him in an interview, she knows immediately it's him. His voice is distinct as it speaks through a clear microphone. There were no lies in his second confession to Y/n.
From what she can tell, heā€™s a beloved member of the Formula One community, a sport she had never truly looked into because she assumed it was overrated. So, did Y/n. The off chance that Lando texted a random person and found something more with them, he lucked out that that someone was clueless when it came to the sport that made him famous.
Her breathing stops when she finds a video that titles Landoā€™s supposed telling of a woman heā€™s taken a liking to. The date of the video tells her itā€™s within the time frame of him and Y/n.
She glances at her sleeping best friend before clicking the link, his smiling face large on her screen.
Landoā€™s giggle is sweet, ā€œYeah, I guess you could say Iā€™ve found someone. Or, at least, have a crush. This girl and I are definitely not official, but thereā€™s something there, I think we can both feel it. Iā€™ve never felt so free with someone.ā€
The reporter, out of view from the watcher, coos, ā€œThatā€™s great, Lando! Whatā€™s her name?ā€
Lando gives the man a warning glance as he states authoritatively, ā€œI wonā€™t be handing that information right now.ā€
He clutches the microphone and Annie can see the way his body shifts with protectiveness. If anything, this is exactly the kind of way she had always wanted Y/n to be treated. Protected and cherished. From what she could gather, from the deepdive of articles and the stories Y/n had told, Lando did just that.
Her heart aches. A stupid man tried to protect himself whilst falling in love with a woman that never even knew who he was. They were never even given a chance.
Somehow, in a black out of pure sadness for Y/n who had always yearned to be adored in this way, Annie found herself buying a ticket to the next Grand Prix, Silverstone of all places.
With a crappy seat and no plan or guarantee of finding him, Annie knew she had to find Lando. She had to fight for something that wasnā€™t even hers.
šŸŽļø
The commotion of fans surrounding the entrance to the paddock puts Annie on edge, not to mention the size of the crowd. She thought she got here early, wanting to be at the front so she could try and talk to him, but as she sees the large amount of people between her and the path where the drivers walk, hope diminishes. Still, she pushes through everyone, apologizing when she gets dirty looks. She knows how bad this looks, how much this most likely goes against common courtesy at races such as these. The face of Y/n with bloodshot eyes and a puffy face forces her to persevere, her best friend deserves someone like Lando.
Sheā€™s halfway through the crowd when it roars to life, screams emitting as people begin to stick McLaren hats and posters in the air. From the sliver of light she can see through some bodies, Annie watches Lando begin to walk through. He stops to sign for some fans and she pushes more forcefully, knowing this is her only chance.
He moves through it all with grace, but a certain speed that makes her heart pick up. Heā€™s at the front of the crowd, about to step into the paddock and be lost completely to her when she yells, ā€œLando! Itā€™s Annie!ā€
Itā€™s the first thing that she can think of, hoping heā€™ll be reminded of Y/nā€™s voice when she tried to cover for her best friendā€™s moment of protection. Annie watches him pause, turn around slowly, as his eyes roam over the sea of people. He locks eyes with her as she waves her arms in the air, something passes between them and he begins running toward her. A connection to the woman he let down, one he hadnā€™t stopped thinking of in the weeks she had left him.
When he reaches her, Lando is stunned by her presence. ā€œYouā€™re Annie? Like Y/nā€™s Annie?ā€ He whispers, the people around her screaming for his signature as she nods her head.
ā€œY/nā€™s Annie.ā€ He looks to be fighting tears as he ushers a security guard over. ā€œI need you to escort her into the paddock, to my driverā€™s room.ā€
The large man nods and Lando walks off, nodding at Annie gratefully. Once heā€™s gone from the premises, the guard moves the rope keeping people from bombarding the drivers up and lets her through.
The walk to wherever Lando had ordered is quiet as Annie takes in the money that surrounds her. People with Cartier jewelry and Birkens waltz around with an air to them that allows Annie to suddenly understand Lando. This is what he was afraid of. A greedy woman who would take advantage of the status he had and lie to him to get to his money and the money around him. While she understood, however, she still felt angry at his deceiving. Y/n was never given the benefit of the doubt.
The guard knocks on Landoā€™s door and it swings open, his sunken face coming into view and in the new light, Annie can see the love that Lando had found in her best friend. The effect of her leaving him is seen all over his body and from what she could gather during her time looking into him, he wasnā€™t doing as well as he usually had during races.
He motions for her to come in and when she does, the door closed, he begins talking, ā€œDid Y/n send you here? Is she here? Can I talk to her? Does she want to see me? Is she forgiving me? Are you-ā€
Her heart breaks as she interrupts him and his quick anticipation of a reconciliation is crushed, ā€œNone of that is true. Iā€™m here on my own terms. Y/n doesnā€™t know Iā€™m here. At this point in time, she doesnā€™t want to see you, but I think thatā€™s the shock of finding out about you.. That will wear off eventually. Sheā€™s hurt, Lando, but I also know she hates not talking to you. She hasnā€™t stopped talking about you. And I canā€™t stand to know that you two found something sheā€™s always deserved, but let it slip away because of fears and betrayals.ā€
He sits opposite of her, staring at her and trying to find the answers he wants to hear in her eyes. He never does.
Lando rubs his palms over his eyes, ā€œI never even got her last name. There was no way for me to find her.ā€
ā€œY/n Y/l/n.ā€
He lifts his head slowly, ā€œWhat?ā€
At the look in his eyes, Annie smiles, ā€œY/n Y/l/n. Thatā€™s her last name. Actually, her full name, I guess.ā€
A small grin finds its way to Landoā€™s face and the way he touches his mouth lightly makes her think he hasnā€™t smiled in a while. ā€œY/n Y/l/n,ā€ He whispers, smile widening as it all falls from his lips.
Heā€™s even in love with her name, Annie thinks.
ā€œCan you take me to her? I would like to be given the opportunity to fight for her.ā€ He asks hesitantly, as if Annie hasnā€™t made it abundantly clear that she is here to help.
She nods, ā€œI will tell you where to meet her, but first, I need you to tell me everything from the beginning, from your perspective.ā€
Landoā€™s head hangs and he begins, hands wringing together in his lap, ā€œWhen I first texted her, I thought she was my friend, Daniel.ā€
ā€œDaniel Ricciardo?ā€ She asks, clarification needed for this story.
Landoā€™s eyebrows rise, ā€œYou know the sport?ā€
She shakes her head, ā€œNo, both Y/n and I never got into it because we didnā€™t think it was that exciting - sorry - but, I basically learned everything about your life and Formula One when Y/n told me your name.ā€
He nods and continues, ā€œWell, yes, I thought she was Daniel Ricciardo, we were supposed to be meeting for lunch that day to just catch up before starting the new season. Well, as it turns out, he had changed his phone number over break because it leaked and never told anyone that he wasnā€™t needing to contact immediately during that time. I assume Y/n mustā€™ve gotten a new number around the time because she got his.ā€
Annie thinks back before realizing Y/n had shattered her phone in the weeks before and ended up getting an entire new cell phone profile. New number, email, everything. She had said she liked the clean slate.
At her nodding, Lando talks once more, ā€œWhen she sent me the picture of her, I immediately thought she was one of the most beautiful people I had ever seen in my entire life. Thatā€™s cliche, but itā€™s true. Sheā€™s still so beautiful to me. Um,ā€ He shakes his head, tears having pooled in his eyes at the mention of her beauty, ā€œI knew I wanted to keep talking to her, see where it went because I couldnā€™t just stop talking to her and never knew what couldā€™ve been. So, I made a quick, impulsive decision. I lied about who I was because I just wanted her to treat me normally. I had no idea who she was or her morals, I couldnā€™t guarantee that she would treat me like everyone else. Obviously, when I learned of who she was and the deep parts of her that no one else got to see, I wanted to change it all. I wanted to tell her so many times who I was and what I wanted with her, what I saw with her, but I knew if I did, I would just lose her. So, I tried to find ways to keep talking to her, but also slowly introduce the truth. Clearly, I never found a way. When you called me, demanding my address and full name I panicked and didnā€™t think about what would happen if I said what was supposed to be my full name. Youā€™re very scary, you know.ā€ He chuckles, Annie does with him, ā€œSo, it all fell from there. She found out Robert Dancing was something entirely fabricated and she called me, telling me to tell her the truth. I was backed into a corner and everything I wanted, I needed, left me. That moment is ingrained in my brain.ā€
He breathes slowly, his eyes still on his hands, before whispering, ā€œI miss her.ā€
Annie nods, ā€œI know. So does she. Thatā€™s why you need to go to this address,ā€ She hands him a small paper, ā€œMeet her there on Monday at 7 PM, come prepared to tell her all of that and more.ā€
He clutches the paper like itā€™s his last lifeline and Annie smiles at how important Y/n is to him.
Lando glances up at her, ā€œWhat do you mean by more?ā€
Annie continues to smile lightly, ā€œThat you love her. That you need her. That youā€™re sorry. Lando, remind her of what you two had.ā€
šŸŽļø
The small apartment complex is daunting to Lando as he stands in front of it. Annie never told him where he was going or what he would be met with, but considering heā€™s here to see Y/n, he can only assume the building he stares at is her home. His anxiety only spikes. He does not want to mess up again. He doesnā€™t want to taint her home with even more pain, he thinks to himself, images of himself groveling and begging for her forgiveness flashing in his mindā€™s eye.
Nonetheless, he knows if he backs out, Annie would find his address this time and physically harm him.
So, the boy walks to the gate and rings her neighbor, following Annieā€™s instructions closely. He remembered how she told him if he rang Y/n, she wouldnā€™t let him in, being stubborn and all. Though, if he rang the neighbor, an older woman Annie called Lo, he had a chance.
ā€œHello? Iā€™m here to see Y/n.ā€ He said into the rusty speaker, a questionable smell infiltrating his nose.
A crackling sound emits from it before Lo is speaking back to him, ā€œAre you Robert Dancing? Annie told me you would be coming.ā€
Lando laughs at the name, his random ideas being the reason for it, and murmurs a yes to her. She doesnā€™t say anything back, just a loud buzzing noise that tells him the door is unlocked.
When he walks through, part of him groans at the lack of an elevator. For an athlete, the man is lazy.
Thus, he begins his scale to the top floor, cursing himself for falling in love with someone who lives so high up.
Heā€™s almost completely lost to his thoughts that he doesnā€™t realize Y/nā€™s door stands in his way once his feet hit the doormat. It dawns on him the time has come to meet her in person, having never before. It should be studied, he thinks, how heā€™s fallen in love with her without ever truly seeing her.
He knocks on the door, not wasting time before he truly aborts whatever mission heā€™s found himself on. And his heart soars when he hears her yell, ā€œComing!ā€
Heā€™s only ever heard it over the phone. To hear it feet away from him is almost as exciting as the idea of her forgiving him.
The door unlocks and pulls open, revealing Y/n in a matching set of pajamas that he remembers her texting him about, asking if they were a stupid purchase or not. He told her to get them, she told him probably not, that she was poor, but she still had.
Her eyes land on him and heā€™s ready for whatever screaming heā€™s about to endure, but she just smiles at him.
ā€œHi! Can I help you with anything?ā€ She acts as if she doesnā€™t recognize him and Lando realizes she doesnā€™t. Annie had mentioned something about Y/n becoming disinterested in seeing who he truly was, out of fear of becoming too attached. His mind mustā€™ve not genuinely absorbed that information because he only understands it now.
She doesnā€™t know who he is.
He could do the same thing he had before, lie and tell her heā€™s someone else. Take the safer option and secure her love, but he takes a breath instead and remembers all Annie had told him. Heā€™d already put her through so much, to do it again would be cruel.
ā€œY/n, Iā€™m Lando.ā€ He says while he watches her face fall.
Her hands fly to the door, about to slam it on his face, but he sticks his foot in right before she can. The impact hurts, but he continues with what he had practiced so many times on the way here.
ā€œPlease, Y/n, just hear me out.ā€ He pleads as her cheeks fill with red. Heā€™s almost sure it isnā€™t a blush.
ā€œHowā€™d you even get my address?ā€ She says, astonished at who stands before her. Her eyes fall over his body, trying to understand the information. Who he is, what he wants.
ā€œAnnie.ā€ He whispers, knowing her confusion will only heighten more.
Her mouth falls open and she yells, ā€œANNIE?!ā€
What he believes to be Lo, pops out from her behind her door at the yelling and Lando lowers his head.
ā€œCan I come in? We shouldnā€™t have this conversation in the hallway of your complex.ā€ He rubs a hand over the back of his neck, hoping sheā€™ll agree. When she does, opening the door for him slowly, he flies forward. While he was ecstatic to be given another chance, he still fears for his image and what would be speculated about a seemingly heated conversation between him and another woman.
She guides him to the couch and they sit down. A familiar creak sounds that reminds him of the ones he would hear when they got into deep conversation during their nighttime calls. The image of her on the phone with him, concentration on her face as she listened to whatever he was revealing and getting comfortable on her sofa, makes him smile softly.
ā€œBo- I mean, Lando, you need to start talking. I donā€™t have all the time in the world to listen.ā€ She gives, her tone ice cold. However, the break in it when she realizes sheā€™s said his former, fake name makes the anger he felt over his lies further. He wants her to say his name, the real one. He wants her to say it with love and excitement, not distance. He wants her and his name on her lips.
ā€œI never meant to hurt you. Actually, what I did was in an attempt to shield myself from any kind of bad faith. I didnā€™t expect to develop what he did. I didnā€™t even expect to open up to you in the way I did. I thought I could make a friend, one who didnā€™t know who I was and didnā€™t have any kind of bias toward me. Iā€™ve always wanted that with someone, especially a partner. I saw an opportunity and I took it, not thinking through it all and I hurt you in the process. Iā€™m so sorry, Y/n. From the moment we started truly talking, calling and all, I knew I had messed up, but I never found a way to tell you. Well, a way to tell you that wouldnā€™t result in you getting rid of me. I wish I could take it all back, but not you. Not what I got to experience with you, what I felt with you. Youā€™re my favorite memory and youā€™ll never understand how grateful I am for you. You helped me through bad races even when you didnā€™t know, helped me through weird press interactions when you didnā€™t know. I loved that. I loved how at peace you made me feel. I canā€™t let this go without knowing I gave it everything I have and when Annie showed up at Silverstone, telling me I had to fight for you, I took whatever she had to give.ā€
Y/n stares at him, trying to digest it all, and murmurs, ā€œAnnie went to Silverstone?ā€
He chuckles lightly, ā€œYes, she came and she told me who she was, what she was doing there. She told me she knew what we had and she didnā€™t want you to lose something youā€™ve always deserved. She gave me this address and told me to come here at this time, told me to buzz Lo instead of you so I could come in. She told me I needed to remind you of what we had.ā€
Y/n goes red again, blushing this time. She smiles at the idea of Annie going to great lengths just to make her happy, ā€œAnnie sounds determined.ā€
Lando smiles along with her, ā€œShe was. She told me if I didnā€™t fight for you, sheā€™d find me and kill me. Sheā€™s really scary, Y/n.ā€
Their eyes meet and Y/n is reminded of what once was, the way he made her feel. She misses him and knowing the intricate shade of brown in his eyes doesnā€™t help how much she wants to shut him out.
ā€œI understand why you did what you did, but that doesnā€™t make it any better. You couldā€™ve given up everything you were saying at any point in time and you didnā€™t. You only told me when I confronted you with it.ā€ She whispers, disappointment evident in her voice. She plays with her fingers and Lando is close to taking them in his hand.
He nods, ā€œI get that. But, I was scared to tell you because I was just so in love with you. I still am.ā€
Her eyes snap to his and a moment passes before she asks, ā€œStill am? You love me?ā€
His cheeks turn cherry tomato, ā€œYes, of course, I am. The moment I realized you were safe enough to open up to, knowing my identity or not, I was in love with you.ā€
She groans and lets her face fall to her palms, ā€œBut, Iā€™m in love with you too.ā€
He laughs and shakes his head, ā€œWhy is that a bad thing?ā€
Her eyes peek from over her hands, ā€œBecause I want to hate you.ā€
Finally, his fingers lace with hers as he brings them away from her face, ā€œBut, you love me. Isnā€™t that enough?ā€
She knows it is. He knows it is. Annie knows it is, even if she isnā€™t there. Itā€™s a matter of if Y/n can put aside the grand web of lies he put together to let them have their shot at something that could be wonderful. In the warmth of his presence, she thinks she can.
šŸŽļø
Y/n
Can you stop blowing up my phone
Bob <3
Why????? Iā€™m bored baby
Y/n
im at work girly
Bob <3
girly šŸ¤­šŸ«¶šŸ»šŸ¤— plz go out to the balcony and answer me
Y/n
I think you might be obsessed with me
Bob <3
i made an alter ego so i could talk to you didnā€™t i?
Y/n
girl
She picks up his call as she closes the door behind her, the new office building sheā€™s in allowing for a wider view of London. The new team she works with is less competitive than the last and their support is proving beneficial with the news she got today.
ā€œMy beloved girlfriend, are you free for lunch today?ā€ Lando giggles into the speaker like the lovesick man he is. Y/n can hear Oscar make fun of him in the background.
She smiles, ā€œI thought you were bored?ā€
ā€œYes, so now Iā€™m asking if you want to have lunch with meā€ He answers as if itā€™s obvious. In the months after the soft moment shared between Lando and Y/n on her old couch, theyā€™ve found something more than love between them. Lando says itā€™s destiny and Y/n says itā€™s a soulmate tie, but they agree that the love they once shared over the phone only grew once in person.
Y/n chuckles at his antics, ā€œSure, I will have lunch with you, Lan. Can you come pick me up though? I donā€™t want to drive.ā€
Lando makes a noise, ā€œWhat did you think I was going to do? Make you drive yourself? No way. Thereā€™s one person in this relationship that drives cars professionally and itā€™s not you, sweetheart. Sorry to break it to you.ā€
Oliver, her coworker, comes to the door, asking for her assistance on something with a smile. She tells him sheā€™ll be a minute and he nods, retreating back into the office quietly, ā€œSorry, my love. I need to go. But, youā€™ll be here when?ā€
Lando hums, ā€œAn hour?ā€
ā€œPerfect! Oh, and, Lando?ā€ She asks, her voice filled with joy as he responds, ā€œYouā€™ll have to come to the Junior VPā€™s office to pick me up.ā€
Silence is met with her sentence before Lando whispers, ā€œEither Iā€™m stupid and you have some big project I forgot about or youā€™re trying to tell me something that will actually make me lose my mind and sanity right now.ā€
She laughs loudly, ā€œI got Junior VP, Lan. Youngest one yet.ā€
He shrieks, momentarily making Y/n go deaf, before screaming to everyone around him about his girlfriendā€™s achievement, ā€œIā€™m so proud of you, baby! Oh my god! Iā€™m so happy! We need to buy champagne! You can have your own podium moment! Holy shit, Iā€™m so proud!ā€
ā€œI would love that, Lan. Thank you. I love you.ā€ She whispers the last part softly, three words that mean so much.
Heā€™ll never get tired of hearing her speak of her love for him, ā€œI love you too, Y/n.ā€
Sheā€™d never get tired of saying it.
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girlokwhatever Ā· 3 days
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can we get a Paige x reader where Paige is like coming to terms with being gay or like coming out pleasee šŸ™Œ
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āœ® ā‹† Ėšļ½”š–¦¹ ā‹†ļ½”awakening,,
paige bueckers x fem!reader
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paige vividly remembers the day she realized you were her gay awakening.
the two of you met in a human development class. you came in late on the first day and sat down right next to her, some of your hair sprawled right onto her computer. you immediately apologized, pulling your hair into a bun and sending her a soft smile. obviously it wasnā€™t a big deal and she told you that, helping to ease your nerves.
you thought she was pretty, hair also pulled back in a bun and sat comfortably in a sweatsuit. she smiled at you with such reassurance it melted you, maybe she knew how nervous you were.
you and paige quickly became close. you worked on assignments together, went out to lunch after class, and she even introduced you to all her basketball friends. you also introduced her to yours, hiding your blush when your friends sent you suggestive glances. but it wasnā€™t like that, paige was just your friend. you didnā€™t even think she was gay. whenever the two of you talked about your past relationships, she only ever talked about guys.
it was your first year at uconn, so you were definitely trying to just navigate your way around your first year. you also really missed your parents. when paige got her injury during a game and couldnā€™t play anymore, you saw how much it affected her. you remembered telling her all about your family and she said they sound super fun to be around, so you asked her if she wanted to go back home with you.
she said yes.
everyone loved her, to say the least. she felt so welcomed in your home. your mom even made her a ā€˜get well soonā€™ cake. your younger siblings clung to her, asking to play basketball and video games.
paige really loved your family.
you carried her bag to your room and told her that youā€™ll have to share a room since thereā€™s no other space. you even offered to pile up blankets on the floor and sleep on that, but she refused to let you do that. i mean, it wasnā€™t really a big deal. youā€™ve shared a bed before.
you both took your respective sides of the bed, but paigeā€™s heart was pounding for some reason and she couldnā€™t stop thinking about you. your scent was everywhere, permeating her senses and making her mind all fuzzy.
thatā€™s when it happened. thatā€™s when she realized she was so in love with you. so enamored by you that she hadnā€™t thought about anyone else since she met you. but she quickly pushed those thoughts back down. she knew you didnā€™t like her. there was this guy back at school that youā€™d been talking about and things seemed to be going pretty well. so instead of talking you to sleep and leaning into your warmth, paige turned her back to you and faced the cold-front.
after you guys got back to school things felt different.
you were going to one of the teamā€™s games wearing a nika mĆ¼hl shirt since paige couldnā€™t really play at the moment. when she saw, she insisted you change to her jersey. you said no because nika was also your friend, but she really kept pushing it.
ā€œthis is stupid.ā€ she heard you mutter it under your breath, probably hoping she wouldnā€™t hear. you ended up not changing, and paige gave you the silent treatment. she started to regret introducing you to her friends, she only wanted to you care about her.
another incident happened when paige met the guy youā€™d been talking to, jeremy.
he was hanging out at your dorm with you watching a movie. Godzilla or something. it was alright, but you couldnā€™t really say you were having fun. he was really nice and funny, but he wasnā€™t really what you were looking for. maybe heā€™d be more fitting as a friend.
paige, not knowing you were hanging out with him, walked straight into your dorm blabbing about how she bought you snacks for your movie night. the same movie night she said to cancel because she couldnā€™t make it.
ā€œthese were the last two bags they had and i got so freaking excited-ā€œ sheā€™s looking up at you, letting her jaw fall before she quickly catches it. she didnā€™t know heā€™d be here with his arm draped around you. she didnā€™t even know you two were still talking.
paige had been telling herself that she didnā€™t like you ever since that night at your house. sheā€™s not into you and definitely not gay. but now, in this moment, she feels that mask slipping away and being taken over by hurt and anger. you mustā€™ve been glad she canceled plans so that you could hang out with your boy toy.
ā€œpaige.. this is, um. this is jeremy. jere, this is paige.ā€
jere. sheā€™s mentally rolling her eyes but putting a smile on her face. youā€™re walking towards her in the kitchen but when she notices him following behind you all she can think about is stepping back and far away from this situation.
ā€œhey, nice to meet you.ā€ heā€™s holding his hand out for paige to shake, and she does. all while feigning her perfect smile. you see right past her though.
ā€œnice to meet you too jimmy.ā€
ā€œjeremy.ā€
ā€œoh, yeah, my bad, jeremy.ā€
she catches you glaring at her and begins to feel a little bad, but this guy doesnā€™t deserve your attention and your time. she knows youā€™re too good for him. sheā€™s really just looking out for you, being your best friend. because thatā€™s what you two are. best friends.
ā€œwell jeremy-ā€œ
ā€œis it ok if i just, steal her away for awhile? really important stuff i gotta tell her.ā€
a flood of relief washes over you because heā€™s nodding and kissing your cheek as he walks out the door. you wipe his kiss away and take a seat on one of the stools against the counter. you canā€™t believe the audacity on paige, but youā€™re silently thanking her for getting rid of him.
ā€œwhatā€™s going on? whatā€™s so important that you have to tell me right now?ā€
ā€œoh, that was just an excuse to get him out.ā€
ā€œwhat?!ā€
ā€œwell i could tell you didnā€™t want him here so..ā€ she didnā€™t actually know if that was true, but she wanted him gone. and now he is. the grin on her face angers you, even though sheā€™s right. how smug shes being about it rubs you the wrong way and youā€™re almost embarrassed because sheā€™s rightā€”you didnā€™t want him here.
ā€œaw thanks paigey. i really wanted you to kick out my date.ā€
paige wants to scream in your face about how much she likesā€”no, loves you. she refrains though. she knows you donā€™t feel the same and doesnā€™t want to lose your friendship. the friendship that has held her together when all she felt like doing was falling apart.
she goes on the defensive because she doesnā€™t like your tone or the fake smile youā€™re giving her. she just wants to lay down with you and catch up on life, maybe ask why you didnā€™t tell her about him. but as soon as she starts talking, she regrets it.
ā€œsorry i was trying to be a good friend. sorry as soon as i said i couldnā€™t make it you decided to have your fuck buddy over to take my place.ā€
ā€œare you being serious? you canceled on me! and by the way, heā€™s not my fuck buddy.ā€
ā€œthen what is he? your boyfriend?ā€
you donā€™t really know what to say because she has a point, heā€™s not your boyfriend. in your heart, heā€™s nothing to you romantically, but you donā€™t want to give her a satisfaction of being right.
ā€œi donā€™t know, maybe! he fucks me like he loves me.ā€
youā€™re walking away from her and into your room, searching for your pajamas. you switch your clothes out and you hear her footsteps tracing yours.
she stands there watching you change, feeling her whole body light up. what does that even mean, he fucks you like he loves you?
itā€™s when her stomach sinks that she knows youā€™re all she cares about, and sheā€™s not afraid to admit it anymore. sheā€™s never felt this type of jealously before. sheā€™s never been in love like this before either. with a girl. is this what itā€™s like?
ā€œwhat does that mean?ā€
you grow hot under her gaze, wondering why itā€™s bothering you now that youā€™re half naked in front of her when itā€™s never bothered you before. sheā€™s got this solemn expression on her face and it feels like she trying to look into your brain.
ā€œwhat does it matter to you?ā€
you realize you didnā€™t like jeremy because you really just wanted paige. it hurts that youā€™ll never have her and youā€™ll just have to find someone else, hoping they can make you feel a fraction of the way she makes you feel. you realize with paige that even if youā€™re arguing, youā€™ll always be happy to see her. to feel her presence in any room. sheā€™s always saying the stupidest things and making you smile.
paige fears the same thing. is she going to have to settle for someone else that isnā€™t you? all because it took her so long to be ok with who she is and how you make her feel. even now, your anger all directed towards her, she admires and loves you. youā€™re so beautiful and genuine. she remembers when you two went out last month, probably the last time you hung out without arguing, and you had the biggest smile on your face. she realizes now all this is because of her. she argues with you and pushes you away because sheā€™s too drawn to you. if she keeps you close, she canā€™t stay away.
ā€œbecause.ā€
ā€œbecause? because what, paige?ā€
ā€œbecause i really love you.ā€ she pauses, trying to find the wording so she doesnā€™t fuck this up. youā€™re staring at her, wide eyes, and you think deep down maybe itā€™s as more than friends.
ā€œi really love you. more than anyone else i think. more than iā€™ve ever loved a girl, or a guy. i love you in the type of way where i canā€™t stay away from you and i have this weird feeling whenever i see you. like butterflies. i love you in the typa way where i want to hold you and kiss you, and spend all of my time with you cause when youā€™re not around all i do is think about you. even when youā€™re around, i canā€™t think about anything else. i.. yeah. i know that i love you.ā€
ā€œpaige..ā€
ā€œand i hate that you like that guy. jimmy or whatever. i hate him because you like him. i wish i could be him, i wish you felt that way about me and not him. iā€™ve never liked a girl before, especially not fallen in love with one, but you changed that for me. when you flung your hair all over my damn computer the first time we met, even then i had it out for you, just didnā€™t know it yet.ā€
her word vomit concludes and youā€™re both shocked. sheā€™s shocked she admitted it and youā€™re shocked she feels that way. about you, of all people. you wish you had recorded it so you can listen to it on repeat forever.
as soon as you open your mouth to speak, she closing her eyes and leaning her head back against the door frame. she didnā€™t really think about the repercussions too hard and now she has to prepare herself for the rejection.
ā€œpaige, i love you too. as more than a friend. i never actually slept with jeremy because i just wanted you. i never said anything about it because i thought you werenā€™t into girls and-ā€œ
sheā€™s got you wrapped around her, clinging to you and sheā€™s kissing you with so much need it might consume her. your lips are soft and moving against hers so perfectly she thinks it might be a dream. sheā€™ll wake up and realize none of it was real. because thatā€™s what you are to her, a dream.
you pull away and look at her, foreheads pressed together. sheā€™s looking at you too, a stupid smile on her face like sheā€™s just won the lottery. in her own special way, she has.
ā€œlove you so much, you have no idea.ā€
sheā€™s pulling you back into a kiss, cupping your face with gentle hands and pulling you impossibly closer. in this moment, you feel heavenā€™s eternal sun shine on you and paige, melting your souls together and making you feel all warm and bubbly.
ā€œso, iā€™m gonna do this better later i promise, but will you be my girlfriend?ā€
ā€œyeah, yes, i will.ā€
sheā€™s kissing you again and now sheā€™s certain itā€™s real. she feels you holding her and knows itā€™s real. she curses herself for not just admitting how she felt sooner, but it ended up with her here in your embrace, so how bad could it really be?
āœ® ā‹† Ėšļ½”š–¦¹ ā‹†ļ½”Ā°āœ©ą­§ā‹†ļ½”šŸ•Æ. -ŹšÉžā€§ā‚ŠĖš ā‹…* ā€§ā‚Š
HOPE YOU GUYS ENJOYED THIS!!
living for these requests atm
also i hope you guys listened to the song, itā€™s so gay awakening core
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nicosraf Ā· 2 days
Note
Wait what did Freydis Moon do? :( I've read their books and really liked them, but I don't follow them anywhere online, so that last ask you got worried me
Freydis Moon has been exposed to be Taylor Barton, a white person from the state of Oregon, someone who had a history of faking their race, being racist, and general abusive behavior. You can read more here about this Taylor person here, and you can find an incredibly long thread here.
Freydis was a colleague of mine, and they took me under their wing when I entered the indie book scene. They presented themselves as a Latine, mystic, queer trans author ā€” who was older than me, I should add ā€” so I deeply admired them and confided in them. I don't think ABM would have ever gotten much attention if I hadn't received their guidance.
There had been some whispers that Freydis was really Taylor, but I'd seen Frey's seemingly darker-skinned hands and heard their real name, which was supposedly Daniela.
Two things I should say before the big reveal: Freydis briefly hired a publicist named Cordi, who was also an agent with their own agency, named The Lynne Agency. Cordi, very randomly, decided to leave the industry and left their clients, and Freydis, hanging. Someone else to mention is Saint Harlow, an author of gay, cannibal erotica. On twitter, Saint was known for peddling a lot of drama ā€” sometimes, he was on the good side of things and sometimes the bad, but he tended to be a massive bully. Freydis allegedly comforted some of Saint's victims.
And the reveal:
Freydis is the race faker Taylor Barton. The evidence is substantial, but most notably, some of the files they shared with other authors, including me, had metadata with the names of Taylor Barton's other identities. I was able to check the files myself to confirm.
They were also Saint Harlow. Meaning Freydis was bullying people secretly on one account and comforting them on another. And the bullying was a lot more disgusting than you might think, but for the sake of the victim, I won't share details.
They were also the publicist/agent Cordi. Why did they pretend to be an agent at all? I'm not sure but they wasted a lot of authors' times, that's for sure. Were they just looking to plagiarize off manuscripts sent to them? Who knows. (A friend of mine who sent their manuscript to them fears so).
There were a lot of interactions between Taylor and I that are much much weirder in retrospect. They critiqued the industry use of #ownvoices, which I agreed about, but blew the issue out of proportion, like thinking #ownvoices gay-trans author book lists shouldn't exist because of potential outing, mlm books by mlm authors lists shouldn't exist because of potential outing, and that lists of books by people of color about people of color also shouldn't exist because... potential outing? Taylor was, to me, oddly sympathetic toward certain authors accused of racism and shot down my concerns of a certain book with what I felt to be pro-colonizer themes inconsistently ā€” their response to racism seemed to depend on whether they already disliked a person or not.
I could say a lot more but as someone who spoke to Taylor in private at times, there were a lot of things I was unsure about even when I was on their side of things. To some people, apparently, Freydis had said they were part Mexican, but only ever told me they were Peruvian (they might've known I'd clock them as a faker). Regardless, when this all came to light, their response was shockingly dismissive.
This may be more info than you asked for but TLDR:
Freydis Moon faked their race and ethnicity, bullied and manipulated many readers and authors using various fake identities, took advantage of latine author resources, and so on.
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russellsppttemplates Ā· 2 days
Text
Christmas in Spain (Carlos Sainz)
First term is over so you go back home to spend Christmas with your family
Note: english is not my first language. Dad!driver always gets me fluffy (and let's pretend it's Christmas season for a bit - it was a bit tricky considering it's sunny and warm outside šŸ˜…)
Thank you so much to everyone who likes and reblogs, your feedback is appreciated šŸ¤ and I'm taking requests so if you have any ideas or concepts you want to share, feel free to do so as I'll try to get to them the best I can!
my masterlist
Tag list: @myloverjk-blog @hiireadstuff @c-losur3
"I hope you have fun holidays!", you waved to the kids as they got their backpacks and ran out the door, excited for the Christmas break.
Grades would be sent over e-mail and on the school platform and a parent-teacher meeting would happen in January, so for now all you had to do was tidy the classroom a bit so you wouldn't come back to a big mess.
"Do you need help?", one of the cleaning staff asked you as they pushed the cart along the corridor.
"No, I'm fine, thank you though! The classroom is not looking so bad - Mark thought it was funny to do the drawings I asked them to on the table, but I had him clean all of that out and I think we've finally won over that bug that was going around because the bin barely has any tissues!", you cheered like you had just won a championship.
"Just in time for them to go home and spend time with all the extended family and friends and catch some other bug, right?", the older lady joked and you laughed along.
"I tidied this the best I could so this one is hopefully quick for you to clean - thank you", you smiled as you grabbed your bags, making sure nothing important was left behind before leaving the room, "I hope your holidays are nice too, I'll see you in January!".
You got in the car and drove home, hoping to find a small chaos since Carlos said he would get everything ready for you to fly out to spend the holiday time with his family in Spain, volunteering to pick up the kids from school so he could get them ready to travel too.
"Mis amores, I'm home!", you gave them a quick shout before putting your things away in the office, having already packed them in separate bags so you could leave the backpack with the things you didn't need in the office and take only the things you needed already in the backpack you would fly with.
"Mama!", Clara was the first to greet you at the door, letting you pull her up so you could hug her, "I'm all dressed for the flight!", she smiled, twirling around in the tracksuit. Since the flight would arrive late, it would be best to have the kids dressed in comfortable clothes given that they would probably fall asleep and in the event that they would arrive at Carlos' parents already asleep, it wouldn't be too bad if they slept in them.
"I can see that, is papa getting the boys ready?", you kissed her cheek and walked up with her to the boys' bedroom.
Mateo was sitting in the play area, his fingers holding finger puppets while Carlos put BenjamĆ­n's sweater on, making you sit down with him.
"Why don't we show mama just how handsome you two look?", your husband said as he allowed him to go to the floor and join his brother in the cuddle you had him on.
"Mama! We're matching!", BenjamĆ­n said, leaving a splotchy kiss on your cheek and showing you the sweatshirt and sweatpants set all three kids had. When you spotted the Christmas themed Disney sets, you had to get them. While the boys had the dark blue version, Clara had the pine green one.
"You look really cute, guys! Are they comfy?", you wondered.
"Yes, feels nice, it's not itchy", Mateo offered and his siblings nodded before you pulled yourself up to your feet, Carlos helping you and landing you on his chest.
"Hello, beautiful", he greeted, kissing your lips after what felt like an eternity as he watched you and your kids. He would happily stare at the four of you forever, but a kiss was needed.
"Hey, amor", you spoke, "seems like you did just fine getting these three monkeys ready to go", you smiled.
"Don't be fooled by it - the boys were not happy they had to have a bath since they weren't going to bed yet, so there were some negotiations and some tantrums", Carlos chuckled.
"Mama, did you know we're flying tonight?", Clara asked, big brown eyes looking up at you as she pulled on your pants' leg.
"Yes, I did! We're going to see abuela and abuelo for Christmas!", you agreed, "which means I also have to go and put something comfortable on, pack what's left and then we can head out!", you clapped your hands.
Changing into an appropriate outfit, you put the last minute things in your luggage before heading down, Carlos already buckling the kids in their car seats while you fit the test of the carry-ons on the car boot.
Driving to the airport was a nice challenge since you wanted to keep the kids awake until you boarded the plane to make things easier and not change their sleep routine too much, meaning that you blasted every Bluey album you had, singing along loudly with the three children.
"Why can't I push the trolley?", Mateo asked as Carlos pushed the trolley with all the bags.
"Because it's to heavy for you, buddy - papa will do it and you hold my hands", you assured, stretching them out once your backpack was secured on, "Clara, stay close to papa, okay?", you warned.
It certainly wasn't the first time you were travelling all together - even though you didn't travel to races as much as you did when it was just you, the kids would often be in most of the European races and a few other ones outside of the continent too -, but your stress levels were still the usual.
"Relax, amor, I packed everything we needed, and if by chance something is missing, either my parents or my sisters will have it or we can go to the store and get it", Carlos tranquilized as you sat in the lounge, the kids happily eating some dry cereal from the bowl.
"I know, I think the school stress is still here somehow even though I've left everything ready and done with - I only have those reports to finish on monday", you sighed as your husband rubbed your shoulders.
"You don't have to worry, okay?", he assured, pulling you to rest on his chest until you got the flight call to board.
The flight itself was fine, the kids staying awake without making too much of a mess and entertaining themselves with their sticker books. As soon as you got to the car, though, everyone was out like a light before you left the airport parking zone.
"Welcome back!", Reyes was the first to greet you as Carlos' stopped the car
Putting his finger in front of lips so they wouldn't be too loud, Carlos spoke softly, "they fell asleep right away, if one of you could help us with them, please", he said as his father took Clara in his arms while you and your husband took each of the boys.
"I'll bring your luggage inside, dears", your moment in-law assured as you walked upstairs to the bedroom where the kids would sleep in.
Tucking the kids with some coos and shushes, you were able to come back to the kitchen and be met with some snacky bits Reyes prepared, "have something to eat and drink, I'm sure it will do you good", she smiled as you sat around the table, catching up for a bit before you retired to your respective bedrooms for the night.
.
"This year I decided I wanted to bake our own roscĆ³n", Reyes announced as she got the ingredients out of the cupboard, not missing the wide-eyed looks and scoff from her children and her husband, "why is it no one has faith in me to pull it off?", she reasoned.
"Mama - it's just, you've never done it", Ana reasoned as her siblings nodded.
"For you to be able to say you can do something, you have to do something you've never done before", the matriarch offered.
"I believe you can do it, abuela", Clara added, "mama always says that when we want to do something, we have to put our minds to it and work as much as we can for it!".
"See? At least someone thinks I can do it - you can be my sous-chef, cariƱo", she smiled at her granddaughter, "do you boys want to join us?".
"Abuelo said he has a new toy car that we can play with him and papa outside", BenjamĆ­n hugged her legs and Mateo followed and replied with "I know you'll do well, abuela".
"Off you go then - means I also get your mama all to myself because not only does she have a magic finger for baking - and I do need all the help I can get - and I won't have all of you stealing her from me", she giggled, tapping their noses and letting them go outside.
Reyes loved all her children the same, and her daughters were no exception to her love. When she found out her only son was enamoured by someone, she wanted to meet the young woman who had taken her boy's heart. Since then, you always felt included in their family activities and like you were her third daughter.
"How has school been?", she asked as you followed the recipe on the propped up iPad, measuring the ingredients and setting them apart.
"My little ones are finally able to do some independent work, they're confident enough to do it and that gives me more time to prepare different things to do with them - I've been really enjoying teaching this class", you smiled, helping Clara with the eggs to make sure no shells fell in the bowl.
"That's nice to hear - you know, Carlos used to worry a lot about you running yourself too much and overworking, especially now with three kids, so I can't hide the fact that I'm happy that it's becoming easier on you", Reyes stated.
"There are hard days - they will always be even if I work all day or no time at all -, but we've got a routine down with them, Carlos is spending as much time home as he can and so far, there hasn't so been much to worry about", you offered.
After kneading everyhting and waiting for the three hours the recipe recalled, you began decorating it.
"Abuela, does this one look good next to this one?", Clara wondered as she displayed the candied fruits on the dough.
"Yes, amor, it looks very delicious - we can only hope it will taste delicious as well!", Reyes kissed her cheek and mixed the sugar with water before sprinkling the mixture.
.
"Are we ready to start writing our letters?", Carlos Sr clapped his hands before joining the kids at the table, Mateo already holding the glue.
"Yes, we're ready, abuelo! Can you help me with my spelling, please?", Clara asked.
The boys were too young to write, so they chose to draw instead and your daughter still required some help.
"Tres Reyes Magos, my name is Clara Sainz, and this year I have been a good girl. I always did as I was told and I did really well in school too - Do you think that's good, abuelo?", your daughter wondered, wanting to know her grandfather's opinion on the start of her letter.
"That's good, cariƱo - now, you have to write to them what you'd like to get for a present", your father in-law praised, turning his attention back to the boys' letters, "have you two decided what you're going to ask for?".
"Yes! I want this game here", Mateo said as he showed his drawing.
"I really hope they'll bring me this book", BenjamĆ­n showed his best attempt of the cover his grandfather had seen you wrap the night before, smiling at the prospect.
"Let's hope they'll bring you those, then", the oldest Sainz in the room said.
"Are we going to watch the Cabalgata tomorrow?", Mateo asked, "I saw some photos from last year but I don't remember much from them", he admitted.
"Yes, if all goes well - we usually go every year, I don't see why we can't go and watch it again", Carlos Sr smiled.
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ellecdc Ā· 9 hours
Text
James and Sirius and Remus and Lily and *takes a dramatic breath* you?
this one's for you @enamoredwithbella, thanks for sorting this idea out with me @unstablereader
poly!Marauders + Lily x shy!reader who is so smitten with them
CW: fem!reader, reader has hair long enough to be played with, reader is in Hufflepuff, swearing, consent because it's sexy AF
This was obviously a bad idea.
Youā€™re not even sure how your friends managed to convince you to attend the Gryffindor party, but you swore to every deity it would never happen again.
There were too many people (most of whom youā€™d never spoken to before), it was too loud (songs you didnā€™t particularly care for), and the fifteenth time someone bumped into you nearly sent you over the edge.
ā€œWhoa there, sweetheart.ā€ A low voice commented as an arm quickly righted you from your nearly horizontal position. ā€œYā€™alright?ā€
You looked up to see the face of none other than Gryffindor quidditch captain James Potter beaming down at you.
You were ashamed of yourself for the way that smile made you feel.
ā€œErm, yup! Thanks.ā€ You squeaked, quickly freeing yourself from Jamesā€™ grasp so fast that you nearly knocked someone else over in your attempt at creating distance between you and the Headboy.
It wasnā€™t that you didnā€™t like James. On the contrary; you were rather smitten with him.
Him and his partners - which was nothing short of dense in simple terms.
But you couldnā€™t help the way you blushed when he held the doors open for you as you walked into classes, or the friendly smile and wave heā€™d shoot at you when he saw you on Prefect rounds.Ā 
You sort of wished heā€™d stop being so bloody nice to you; maybe then youā€™d be able to get over this crush that was never going to amount to anything.
But James was taken; three times over.Ā 
And what a sodding group they were.
Heart Throb of Hogwartsā„¢ Sirius Black in his effortless style, his devil may care attitude, and his insatiable flirting. Being noticed by Sirius felt like your favourite rockstar singing a song written just for you.Ā 
And donā€™t even get you started on the enigma that is Remus Lupin; the Cassanova of Gryffindor tower. Everyone in your year (and likely the years below you) had at some point or another crushed hard on the quiet Marauder; but it really couldnā€™t be helped. He was tall, he was handsome, he was kind, and though he was far more quiet than his counterparts, the quips he shared with you never ceased to reduce you to a fit of laughter.
And gods, was Lily Evans ever beautiful. She was the total package; she was funny, outgoing, smart, and stunning. Looking at her even now with her long auburn hair as she threw her head back in laughter; so open and care free in her actions. You werenā€™t sure if you wanted to be her or being underneath-
No.
No. That was not a nice thing to think about someone who was in a committed relationship.
You let out a sigh as you zoned back into the fact that James still had one of his hands on your elbow and was smiling curiously at you.Ā 
ā€œThanks for the save! I really owe you one.ā€ You chuckled awkwardly and nearly took out one of the Prewett twins in your haste to leave Potterā€™s vicinity.Ā 
Unfortunately, trouble seemed to be following you.
And by trouble, you meant Sirius Black.
ā€œDamn, Hufflepuff!ā€ He cheered as he moved a sultry gaze up and down your body appreciatively. ā€œGive us a spin, dollface.ā€
You felt all the blood in your body migrate to your cheeks as you fought to keep your mouth from falling open.
Lily, the beautiful angel (or the evil temptress, depending on how you looked at it), swatted at Sirius from her perch on the arm of the chair her boyfriend was currently occupying.
ā€œDown boy; youā€™re going to scare her away.ā€ She teased with a smirk as she winked at you.Ā 
You felt momentarily grateful for her.
And then she spoke again.
ā€œThen none of us will get to look at her.ā€
Fucking Helga, was it hot in here? They needed to open more windows; preferably one you could launch yourself out of right now, thank you very much.Ā 
ā€œThatā€™d be such a shame, really. Sorry doll, you donā€™t gotta spin - no one else here deserves to appreciate such a view.ā€
ā€œOkay.ā€ You squeaked and turned in search of your friends.
You know what? Fuck your friends; you were leaving with or without them.Ā 
They werenā€™tā€¦.flirting with you, were they?
Surely not.
Of course not.
What a ridiculous thing to think.
Butā€¦it certainly felt like they were flirting with you.
Maybe one more glance?
Just as you were about to approach the portrait hole, you turned for one more look at the objects of your affection and your current tormentors and - yup, sure enough - Sirius, Lily, and now James were all standing there smiling at you.
They were watching you leave?!
Okay time to go, that is enough nonsense for one day.Ā 
You spun and collided with something tall and solid which thankfully caught your arms as you all but ricocheted off of them.
ā€œHey there, dove. Whereā€™re you headed in such a hurry?ā€
Please for the love of gods, donā€™t tell meā€¦
But of course, you looked up to see the face of one Remus Fucking Lupin smirking down at you.Ā 
ā€œYou lot are everywhere.ā€ You whispered in awe. The bastard only chuckled in response.
ā€œCome on you guys! Weā€™re going to start a game of truth or dare!ā€ Lily called over toā€¦you (?) and Remus.
ā€œWell, we wouldnā€™t want to miss that, would we?ā€ Remus murmured lowly into your ear as he steered you towards the growing circle congregating around the various chairs and sofas littering the common room.
And listen, youā€™re not particularly proud that you were so placid in Remusā€™ man handling you.
But in your defenceā€¦
In your defence, Remus was man handling you.Ā 
And to your absolute horror, he plopped you down beside Lily on a large chair that was not quite large enough for two people.Ā 
You tried to swallow your heart back down which was attempting to escape via your mouth as you became hyper focused on the fact that Lily sodding Evans was pushed up against you none too casually and- Merlinā€™s tits, was she playing with your hair!?Ā 
You pretended to pay attention as a few rounds passed by; your friend being dared to give you a lap dance being the most brazen thing to have taken place.
Until it got to the Marauders.
Marlene dared Sirius to strip down to his boxers for a whole round which he was all but too eager to do, apparently. Meaning he got to ask the next person.
ā€œMoony!ā€Ā 
Remus smiled down at his lap before he looked over at one of his boyfriendā€™s mischievously.Ā 
ā€œI dare you to kiss the prettiest girl here.ā€
Youā€™re not necessarily proud of the way your heart plummeted at that; this is what you had been telling yourself all night. They were taken.
No matter if they complimented you.
No matter if they caught you as you fell.Ā 
No matter if they snuggled up to you on a chair designed for one.
No matter if one of them made you feel like you leaving the party early would have been truly devastating.
No matter.
ā€œThatā€™s impossible; thereā€™s two of them.ā€ Remus said quickly, causing your heart to ache for Lily.
Who even says that when their girlfriend is sitting right here!?
You kept your head down as the party all oooohā€™ed and aawwwweeeā€™d.
James let out a funny high pitched laugh as if he were an over excited kid on Christmas morning. ā€œGuess youā€™ll have to kiss them both then.ā€Ā 
You really should have left when you had the chance; you werenā€™t sure you could watch.
It was their business if they wanted to include another, but that didnā€™t mean you had to like it.
ā€œOr they can kiss each other; I think Iā€™d enjoy that just as much.ā€Ā 
ā€œSounds good to me.ā€ Lily said as she stood; the space she once inhabited felt cold and vacant without her.
ā€œWell? Come on then?ā€ She said as she grabbed your arm.
ā€œWhat?ā€
ā€œCome with me.ā€ She said again, wiggling your arm within your grasp, and who were you to deny her, really?
Like a well trained dog you followed her obediently over to where Remus sat before she all but shoved you into his lap.
ā€œYou seem like the fidgety type; maybe Rem can help with that, hm?ā€ She said as she shot a wink at Remus over your shoulder.
His arms wrapped possessively around your waist as he rested his chin on the junction between your neck and shoulder.
ā€œIs it okay if she kisses you, pretty girl?ā€
You had no time to be absolutely horrified at the pathetic little keening sound that escaped your lips as you looked up at the red-head now towering over you.
ā€œWhat do you say, gorgeous?ā€ And though her emerald eyes did shine with some mischief, you could see she was earnest; this was your choice.
ā€œOkay.ā€ You whispered barely loud enough for you to hear yourself over the hammering of your heart.
ā€œYeah?ā€ She whispered as she knelt in front of you.
ā€œYeah.ā€ You agreed.
And you only got to see the soft, hopeful smile that adorned her lips for but a moment before her hands were on either side of your face and she was pressing her soft lips to yours.Ā 
It could have been hours or centuries but it was also all too soon before she was pulling away from you; a proud smile on her lips though her cheeks were a similar colour to her hair.
You became aware of the hooting and hollering going on around you as Remusā€™ chest began to vibrate in laughter.
ā€œBeautiful.ā€ He murmured - likely more to himself than to you, but you heard it all the same.
ā€œDo I get a turn?!ā€ James shouted before Sirius roughly grabbed him by the waist and planted him down on his lap.
ā€œNot before me, Jamie.ā€ He snickered as he shot you a wink.Ā 
The audacity of a man to still be so confident sitting in nothing but his boxers.Ā 
You tried to hide behind your hands though it was all for naught as Remus made a theatrical cooing sound and pulled you further into his lap until you were all but cradled in his arms.
ā€œMaybe without an audience next time, hm?ā€ He asked you as he brushed some hairs away from your forehead.
Not trusting yourself to speak (or to even make direct eye contact with the bloke currently cuddling you in your lap), you nodded with your face still hidden.
ā€œWay to go babe.ā€ James said as Lily went to join the two boys on their loveseat. ā€œYou were so good, weā€™ll even get a next time!ā€
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adventuringblind Ā· 2 days
Text
AUS24 (3k words)
Oscar Piastri x Liam Lawson x Reader x Logan Sargeant
Genre: Angst, fluff, spice, A/B/O AU
Summary: James Vowels takes things a step further when covering his ass in the media. Logan and his mate pay the price but Oscar and Liam are there to help.
Warnings: A/B/O dynamics, heat/rut cycles, James Vowels is the bad guy in this one, Alex being a king, Thigh riding, other alluded to sexual things but not specific so IDK what else to put
Notes: This one was a lot and I hope I filled the request okay! I struggled... Therefore y'all should feed my praise kink in order to motivate me. Jk...... unless?
Side Note: My ABO dynamics and how I write it is different so be forewarned ig. Also, NSFW under the cut. MINORS AVERT YOUR EYES!
Masterlist // Request Form // My Website // buy me a Ko-Fi
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Oscar didnā€™t think much of it when he jumped out of the car and didn't see Logan. He figured heā€™d rushed off to make sure Alex was okay after that nasty crash and see if the team was going to be able to fix the betaā€™s car.Ā 
Practice had gone pretty decent. He should probably meet up with Lando to talk about how heā€™d felt in the car. All things considered, heā€™s mildly optimistic.Ā 
The itch in his neck leaves him wondering which of his three mates could possibly be annoyed. Oscar usually assumes Liam, given the nature of the omega. Oscar had to learn to pick his battles early on. He understands that in entirely alpha or omega families, dynamics have to be flexible. Liam is more alpha coded then he is omega. Unfortunately for the mess of things that is the paddock, people give him shit for it and Oscar has had to haul the kiwi away before he killed somebody.Ā 
Oscar, because heā€™d prefer not to spend his home race weekend bailing Liam out of jail, speeds off towards the RB garage. He doesnā€™t have to go far since Liam is also sprinting in his direction. ā€œOscar! Are you alright? I thought maybe something happened when you got out of the car since I feel all prickly.ā€ The blonde smells both annoyed and concerned.Ā 
Oscar shakes his head. ā€œI thought you might be trying to take the head off Helmut againā€¦ā€ He shakes his head and continues his walk down to the Williams garage with Liam on his heels. ā€œHave you seen the other two at all?ā€Ā 
ā€œHer and Logan walked down to the William's garage together. That was about twenty minutes ago.ā€Ā 
On their trek to the end of the paddock, They end up running into George. The second British Omega on the grid. Heā€™s pacing outside of the garage and Oscar has to bite back a gag at how distressed he smells. ā€œGeorge?ā€
ā€œOscar! They wonā€™t let me in.ā€ Heā€™s raking fingers through his and getting increasingly more distressed the longer they are stuck outside. ā€œHe sent me a text saying something happened, but didnā€™t elaborate. I can feel his anger.ā€Ā 
Oscar, because he has no idea what to do in this scenario, sends Liam with George to find Lewis, or Carlos, or Max, or Lando, or anyone else who might know what to do right now because he has no idea. He just needs to see the other half of his mates or heā€™s going to lose it.Ā 
He tries to flag down anyone in the vicinity, only to be ignored. Heā€™s about ready to come unhinged until he gets the attention of James. The alpha team principal keeps his distance - the invisible boundary line the only thing keeping Oscar from shaking the information out of him. Only, James doesnā€™t just smell like James. No - he smells like Oscarā€™s other two omegas. Both of which must be in heat.Ā 
He tries to breathe; reign himself in so he doesnā€™t lose it and end his entire career (though he will if it comes down to it). ā€œWhere are they?ā€ If there is a growl laced within the question, he canā€™t be bothered to care.ā€
James looks like he might jump into an explanation of some kind, but gets foiled by Alex. The beta looks pissed. The kind of anger that shows in every movement.Ā 
ā€œJAMES!ā€ While Oscar flinches at the olders tone, James remains calm. It's aggravating in a way. ā€œTell Oscar what you did or I will.ā€
James sighs and motions for the Australian to follow him. Alex can't growl, but the way he's seething tells Oscar that he would if he could. It's ironic to think that between the three of them, Alex is the most angry compared to the two alphas trudging through the garage.Ā Ā 
James gestures for him to go inside. The scent leaking through the cracks in the door is terribly seductive and Oscar has to dig his nails into the palm of his hands to ground himself. ā€œNeither of them were supposed to be in heat this early. All four of us are synced and just went through this a month ago.ā€ he stares down the older alpha for an explanation.Ā 
He takes an inventory of his own body. His own reaction to his mates in heat is moreā€¦ intense. Like he can't keep himself off them. Currently he feels more protective than anything.Ā 
ā€œsince James won't tell you, I will-ā€
ā€œIt's team business!ā€Ā 
ā€œNot when the safety of others is concerned!ā€Ā 
James makes a lunge for Logan but Oscar matches his speed and steps in front of him. He wants to retch at how awful James smells at the moment.Ā 
Four pairs of footsteps from the direction they had come from. Liam and George have managed to find them and dragged Carlos and Lando as well. It's terribly comforting to have more people around.Ā 
ā€œwhat's going on?ā€ Lando whines at the door the closer he gets. ā€œIs Logan in heat? But didn't he just have one?ā€Ā 
Alex is much taller than Oscar, but the beta appreciates the gesture given the nature of how betas usually are towards anyone else. ā€œOscar, why don't you, me, George and James speak about this in his office. Carlos can come too, if you'd like.ā€Ā 
ā€œyeah - yeah okay. I need to know what happened.ā€ He looks around for Liam and pulls him away from James. ā€œSorry - I don't know what's happening. I didn't mean too-ā€Ā 
Liam attaches himself to the alpha and noses at his neck. ā€œI'll take care of them while you're gone. Lando is going to stay also.ā€Ā 
Oscar nods, kisses his head, and drags himself away. He doesn't want to go anywhere but inside that room. Be it biology or his own mind, clearly something is wrong and he would desperately like to be there for the people he loves. Still, Liam is here and that makes things better. They aren't alone.Ā 
They settle into chairs in Jamesā€™ office. Carlos opts to stay by the door watching everything going on outside. ā€œWhy are they taking apart Logan's car?ā€Ā 
Oscar blinks at him. They're what?ā€Ā 
ā€œI crashed the car and broke the chassis. James decided to punish Logan for it. But that's not even the worst part!ā€ Alex looks expectantly to his team principal. A silent urge for him to tell his own story. He gestures for Alex to come continue on and the beta rolls his eyes. ā€œLogan and y/n walked here together. James summoned them into the office together. He told Logan he was going to give me his car. Obviously, I said no andā€¦ā€Ā 
George shuffles his way over to Alex. The physical contact between the two seems to lessen Alex's rising emotions. ā€œIt was probably my fault, since I kept saying no.ā€ Alex throws a packet of heat inducers on the table. ā€œI was restrained. James didn't show he had a whole package - just dissolved way over the recommended amount into a cup and commanded Logan to drink it. She got to it first so he didn't have to drink it, and downed the entire thing in seconds.ā€Ā 
ā€œThat doesn't explain Loganā€™s-ā€
ā€œHe had more and just repeated it. Then he used that fucking voice to get them to not tell anybody and lock themselves away.ā€ Alex looks like he's on the brink of tears. ā€œI'm sorry, Oscar.ā€Ā 
Oh - the rage that's building beneath his skin. He moves to throw himself at James, but is foiled by Carlos. ā€œYou can't help from jail.ā€Ā 
Which, the Spaniard isn't wrong, so Oscar goes limp in his hold. He takes a few ragged breaths to force himself to calm down. ā€œIt's not your fault Alex, at all. Sounds to me like it's a move to cover his own ass.ā€Ā 
ā€œAlex is out best chance-ā€Ā 
ā€œBullshit! I just murdered my car!ā€Ā 
The door to the office is thrown open and Oscar has no time to react to the fact Max and Daniel, his pack alpha and omega - respectively, got word of this.Ā 
ā€œDid we need to alert the entire grid, Alex?ā€Ā 
Max openly, and without hesitation, growls at the team principal in question. Daniel hits him upside the head to get him to stop. ā€œWhereā€™s Logan at?ā€
ā€œMy driver doesnā€™t need anymore assistance, Daniel-ā€Ā 
All of them (aside from Alex) Descend into a fit of threatening noises. ā€œReally? Because heat inducers can fuck up anyoneā€™s body on a normal dose. Trust me James, Iā€™ve been in this scenario with my own team.ā€
Briefly, Oscar recalls Lando talking about McLaren trying to induce Danielā€™s heat without his knowledge. Andrea is a much better team principal and He can vividly recall Lando near sobbing when they were assured that would never happen.Ā 
ā€œIn Loganā€™s room.ā€Ā 
ā€œGreat! Hereā€™s what weā€™re going to do then.ā€Ā 
George has to drag Alex away from the Office and back up to his room. The British Omega throws a middle finger at James before heā€™s out of sight completely. Max is staying with James until things get sorted out. Which - unfortunately since the laws are so unfair - will mean James gets away scot free. Daniel says heā€™s going to be subjected to a lecture first. The rest of them head back to Loganā€™s room with the intent on getting out of the building.Ā 
ā€œShould I call Andrea and Zak?ā€ Oscar looks desperately at Daniel for instructions. Heā€™s never had to leave so suddenly and has no clue if there is a protocol for these things or not.Ā 
ā€œNo worries, I took care of it. We just need to get them out of the paddock.ā€ the older Aussie pats his shoulder reassuringly. ā€œIā€™m assuming the four of you arenā€™t prepared at all?ā€Ā 
Oscar shakes his head. ā€œWe all synched just last month.ā€Ā 
ā€œAnything you need then? I can send George and Alex on errands. Actually, Iā€™m hoping for that seeing as Alex is desperate to help.ā€Ā 
ā€œI hope he sees that this isnā€™t his fault.ā€
ā€œHeā€™ll come around, I hope you know itā€™s not your fault either.ā€Ā 
And here Oscar thought he was hiding it so well. He tries to shake it off, play his own insecurities down. ā€œIā€™m-ā€
ā€œRelax mate, Max felt guilty for weeks.ā€
ā€œBut itā€™s my job to protect them-ā€ The voice crack was unnecessary and completely screwed him over in terms of hiding whatever feeling he had buried.
Daniel turns to face him right outside the door. ā€œYou canā€™t change the past, Oscar. You were never going to be able to stop this from happening. What you can do is help them now because they need you.ā€Ā 
Oscar nods with newfound determination, and opens the door.
She certainly wouldnā€™t say it was her greatest decision, definitely one of the easier ones in the moment. Sheā€™d downed the drink without a hesitation.Ā 
Theyā€™d attempted a nest. Tried to make the room comfortable. The amount of drugs in their systems was not making it easy. Instead opting to throw everything on the floor and try to sleep before they canā€™t.Ā 
Theyā€™d stripped down to undergarments within the last few minutes. The heat steadily building and becoming too much. Still, she lays plastered against Logans body; his scent intoxicating.Ā 
ā€œYou didnā€™t have to do that for me.ā€ He noses at her neck, teeth nipping at the three scars lining her collar bone.Ā 
ā€œWanted to help, Lo.ā€ She feels like crying. The odd lack of connection bombarded her after James used his stupid voice. ā€œWanted you to race.ā€Ā 
The door squeaks open sometime later. After a nap and the first round of what will probably be many. She peaks her head out from around Logan whoā€™s gone defensive from the new intrusion. Only - Liam peaks his head inside and Lando follows before shutting the door again. She whimpers and tries to claw her way to Liam, but is pushed back gently by Lando.Ā 
ā€œHeā€™s grabbing a few things.ā€ She can see him trying to smile gently at her.Ā 
Liam ends up between them, his own shirt off and one of Oscarā€™s sweatshirts in hand. She makes herself as small as possible to curl up into his side. ā€œDo you two need anything specific right now.ā€Ā 
ā€œWhereā€™s Osc?ā€ Logan beats her to the question.Ā 
ā€œTalking with James, I believe.ā€Ā 
The whines are involuntary. That part of her brain still fighting for its life wants to know why heā€™s not here right now. The overthinking side is claiming itā€™s because sheā€™s undesirable now. ā€œDoes he still want us?ā€Ā 
Liam coos at her, as does Logan and Lando. ā€œYou'll never not be undesirable.ā€Ā 
ā€œBut what about James?ā€
ā€œWhat do you mean?ā€ She can feel Liams muscles tense underneath her. She shrinks in an attempt to hide from the new angry scent permeating the room.Ā 
Thankfully, Logan takes over for her. ā€œHe used his voice on us. He wanted to give me inducersā€¦ā€Ā 
She, despite the struggle, rolls herself over Liam and into Logan's lap. ā€œNot your fault.ā€
ā€œI know-ā€ his desperate whine nearly kills her. And Liam - by the looks of it. He's restraining himself if the way his jaw is tensing is any indicator.Ā 
ā€œLando, would you mind possibly grabbing mine and Oscar's stuff so we don't have to leave here again if possible?ā€ It's not fair really, that Liam can be bossy and she finds it attractive.Ā  Oscar is also bossy, but heā€™s the gentle bossy and Logan isnā€™t bossy at all. Wow - her stupid hormones have her drooling over this and she doesnā€™t even know what this is.Ā 
Liam makes up a list for Lando and the Brit runs off to collect the items. She wonders how long Oscar is going to be and if the ache in between her legs will let up until they can leave.Ā 
Itā€™s the only thing on her mind. Itā€™s also now all over her thighs. An unfortunate circumstance where there are no towels on the ground. At this rate she might die if she canā€™t do something about these feelings and the longer she waits the more desperate she becomes.Ā 
ā€œDo you need something, darling?ā€ Her hazy mind decides that now is a great time to register that sheā€™s grinding into Liam's leg. She doesnā€™t stop though. If anything - she canā€™t, because he has a hand on her hip urging her to continue. ā€œOnly one of me at the moment, is this okay for now?ā€ She makes a weak sound and makes a mess of herself and Liamā€™s poor thigh. Not like Logan is doing any better. They both smell good like this.Ā 
She has no idea how much time passes, the endless amount of work sheā€™s having to do finally wears her out enough to relax for the time being.Ā 
ā€œI guess I shouldā€™ve stripped all the way, huh?ā€ Sheā€™s too tired to be embarrassed about Liamā€™s teasing comments. She barely even notices Liam attempting to clean her up. Her mind is too far gone. Enough that her and Logan are both ready to go again after a few measly minutes.
They don't get very far, instead scrambling under whatever is available as the door swings open. Liam is hissing at the intruder, only to see Oscar and Lando poke their heads inside.Ā 
ā€œHey Daniel, I think maybe weā€™ll stay here for the time being and then when the traffic of the paddock dies down we can try and leave.ā€Ā 
Daniel also slips into their space. She makes a lunge for either of the two Australians. Oscar is quick to react to her movements and get her to stay put underneath the little amount of covering she has.Ā 
Lando drops the bags of stuff he was holding and tries to smile at them before he leaves. Unfortunately, his sad scent gives away his true feelings. She wonders if he knows the full story now since Oscar definitely does.Ā 
Itā€™s just her, her mates, and Daniel now. The pack Omega is hovering by the door and is clearly ready to leave them to their own devices. ā€œKeep in mind that reactions to heat inducers are unpredictable but fast. Youā€™ll only be in ā€œheatā€ for about a day. Then youā€™ll just be sick, but weā€™ll take it as it comes.ā€Ā 
Daniel reminds Oscar to text him if they need anything and then leaves them alone. Which - she likes Daniel, but being able to jump the bones of her mates sounds all too appealing.Ā 
ā€œJames?ā€ Logan looks pleadingly at Oscars for some kind of reassurance.Ā 
ā€œIs going to get an earful from Max and Daniel. Aside from that, he will probably get a slap on the wrist. Alex is ready to kill him though, if thatā€™s what you wanted.ā€
The three of them find humor despite the nature of the situation. Itā€™s why she loves them so much. The way she can feel safe and taken care of, but still be herself and laugh and give into her own desires.Ā 
Oscar loses his own clothes. The fireproofs he was wearing around his waist come off in record time.Ā 
ā€œYou're still going to race, right Osc?ā€
ā€œWeā€™ll see-ā€ Oscar nearly jumps when the three of them whine and pout in unison. ā€œI take it that you want me to race?ā€Ā 
ā€œWeā€™ll make do without you.ā€Ā 
ā€œHey!-ā€
ā€œLiam is good for something after all!ā€ Logan wheezes in laughter. Only for Liam to grumble and decide enough is enough. He takes Logan by the hips and slams right into him.Ā 
She looks between the two of them and Oscar. She leans up to his ear, fully intent on whispering to him but gets a little distracted by his scent while shifting around.
ā€œNeed something?ā€Ā 
Finally, she surrenders herself to the haze knowing she has all her mates with her. ā€œJust you three.ā€Ā 
190 notes Ā· View notes
bombuni Ā· 1 day
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contains: poly!ateez x gn!reader, soft ateez taking care of u, non-verbal and self-isolating reader, implied depressed/chronically ill reader
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you: babies i think itā€™s better if you donā€™t come over tonight
joong: Everything ok?
minmin: but im hungry and u said uā€™d make dinner :(
woo: WEā€™RE HUNGRY!!! OM NOM NOM
you: just not feeling it tonight. sorry
You shut your phone off with guilt weighing in your heart. You had promised your boys a nice home-made dinner after a hard week full of non-stop practicing. You knew theyā€™d been looking forward to it the entire week, the stress-free time theyā€™d get to spend with you, but, thereā€™s a pit in your stomach thatā€™s been growing the past week and now itā€™s big enough to stop you from doing anything else but wallow in your thoughts. Now the guilt just adds to it.
Thereā€™s times when you donā€™t have energy for anything. Not even for your favorite people on Earth and itā€™s simply your bodyā€™s fault. At least you try to tell yourself that.
Thereā€™s no response to your last message and you sent it an hour ago. Usually youā€™d be suspicious about the lack of whining and bickering, but youā€™re just too tired to worry as fatigue fogs your senses. Youā€™re set for a night of self-pity when your front door unlocks, myriads of voices barging in and breaking the calm of your apartment. You already feel a headache coming on as Wooyoung, like usual, argues about whatever hill heā€™s chosen to die on.
You want to get up to greet them, but somethings stopping you. The pit in your stomach almost weighs you down, your limbs too heavy to move now. You sigh and surrender to your bodyā€™s fatigue.
Seonghwa watches you with a sad look on his face. He knows all the tell-tale signs of your sad ruts by now, the most obvious of all being when you go out of your way to isolate yourself. It hurts him because he wants to help you, but heā€˜s not quite sure how to do it right with you.
ā€œSweet thing,ā€ he coos quietly and lays a gentle hand atop yours, ā€œhow do you feel?ā€
His attention turns a switch on in you, feeling yourself melt against his soft touch and caring voice. You shrug, feeling a loss of words. You donā€™t really have any to describe how you feel. Or rather, thereā€™s a boulder in your throat stopping you from even attempting to say anything.
Hongjoong and San walk over, the latter immediately scooping you up into his arms despite Seonghwaā€™s protests. Hongjoong leans over the back of the couch, carding his fingers through your hair and tutting at the state youā€™re in.
ā€œYouā€™re not getting rid of us that easy, you know,ā€ he mumbles.
San looks right at you even if you wonā€™t meet his eyes, trying his best to communicate the worry he has because he knows words donā€™t work with you when youā€™re like this. Seonghwa flicks Sanā€™s forehead, pulling a loud noise of protest out of him, ā€œArenā€™t you supposed to be helping in the kitchen?ā€
San responds by pulling you tightly against him and closing his eyes in bliss. Seonghwa grumbles something about disrespect, but walks away to help in the kitchen himself. Itā€™s starting to feel a little warm with Sanā€™s irresistible need to touch you and Hongjoongā€™s eyes not once leaving your form. It gets unbearably hot when you feel Mingiā€™s lips against the crown of your head, Wooyoung doing the same and immediately jumping into gently scolding you for pushing them away.
Hongjoong wants to agree but he knows itā€™s not what you need right now. He shushes Wooyoung, ā€œDid you take your meds yet?ā€
You shake your head. Yunho walks up to you, bending down to hand you your medicine with a kind smile on his face. He takes your hand in his when you swallow your pills, kissing each of your knuckles gently, as if he fears scaring you away.
ā€œHere.ā€ Yeosang passes you a glass of water. Thereā€™s eight pairs of eyes on you and you can feel each one. Itā€™s like theyā€™re watching a zoo animal on display and youā€™d laugh at the thought in any other circumstance.
Jongho stands across you, intently staring you down, ā€œYou know you canā€™t just expect us to leave you alone, right?ā€
San pulls your head into his chest and throws protective arms over you as if youā€™re a kid getting a scolding, ā€œDonā€™t be mean.ā€
Jongho is about to retort before Seonghwa stops him, ā€œOk! Ok, what Jongho means,ā€ he kneels down next to Yunho with a gentle expression aimed at you, ā€œIs that we want to help you, sweetheart. And itā€™s hard to do that when you donā€™t allow us to,ā€
Yeosang scratches at his neck as he finds the words, ā€œWe know itā€™s hard for you to do that, butā€¦ā€
Hongjoong continues for him, ā€œWeā€™re just asking that you try at least. Okay?ā€
You hesitantly nod into Sanā€™s chest and you feel him let out a sigh of relief. Wooyoung speaks up from behind you, ā€œYouā€™re hogging ā€˜em, Sannie,ā€
He shakes his head violently and hugs you tighter, ā€œNo ā€˜m not.ā€
Mingi grimaces, ā€œYou totally are.ā€
Itā€™s all-out war again and your body shakes between theirs as each one tries to take you for themselves. Sanā€™s still got a good grip on you as Yunho, Seonghwa, and Jongho fight to pull him off of you. Wooyoung and Mingi stand back and argue with San, really the only thing theyā€™re good for. Hongjoong and Yeosang grimace and watch the events unfold, only waiting to step in if they notice you get overwhelmed.
But you donā€™t. You feel warm and loved and happy, and thereā€™s a bubble of laughter forming in your throat and surpassing the boulder that was stuck in you before. Youā€™ll take it one step at a time, and theyā€™ll take that step with you.
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bom note: this is for the gays with chronic fear of being emotionally vulnerable. i tried to make readers issues as vague as possible for u. Also realistically i would not want 8 men all up in my space when im in one of these moods but itā€™s fantasy ok shhh
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ikeuverse Ā· 2 days
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BIRTHDAY SURPRISEĀ ā€”Ā p.jongseong
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PAIRING: jay x fem!readerĀ GENRES: fluff WC:Ā 2.3k+
WARNINGS:Ā maybe two swear words. just something simple for our jay's birthday.
NOTES:Ā happy birthday to our black kitty and guitarist jay! i'm not 100% happy with this, but i wanted something quick just so i wouldn't spend his birthday doing nothing (and because i'm sick today), but all for our jay. i hope you like it!
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Jay was thrilled to be returning two days before his business trip. He wished he'd had time to tell his family and friends so they could organize a party to celebrate his birthday, but he only managed to call Heeseung and Sunghoon so they could pick him up at the airport.
Seeing his two best friends after passing through the arrivals gate, Jay breathed a sigh of relief because he could finally take his mind off work and go home. To his family.
"Hey, buddy" Sunghoon waved to him when he was close enough, welcoming him with a hug that Jay didn't even bother to reciprocate.
"Hey man, I missed you," Jay mumbled after letting go of Sunghoon and going to hug Heeseung.
"Awn, did he come back more sentimental?" Heeseung squeezed him in his embrace, hearing his friend laugh after releasing him.
"Italy does that to people," Jay said.
"So," the three of them started walking through the airport, Sunghoon making a point of carrying Jay's suitcase, assuming the boy was tired from his trip, "how did you find inspiration in another country?"
"Italy surprised me, I'll be honest" Jay walked between the other two "I think I'll be able to bring a lot of ideas to the restaurant."
Being a chef had its advantages, such as traveling to a country in search of something new for the menu, which Jay always made sure was sophisticated. He knew that after graduating in gastronomy he would never stop studying, because that was the fun of it, learning all the time in a vast culinary world. Where he knew he could get to know even more, learn even more, and make his restaurant the most talked about and visited in the country.
"Where are we going?" As soon as the three of them reached the car, Sunghoon put Jay's suitcase away and pulled up next to his friend, smiling.
"Oh, we managed to warn your mother and she wants to have a little get-together for your birthday," he shrugged as if it were a completely casual conversation.
Jay looked surprised, raising his eyebrows and even smiling a little more than usual.
"Really?" Jay's smile widened even more when his two friends agreed.
In his mind, it would be something very small indeed, as many friends as he could gather and a few relatives who lived close enough to give them time to get to Jay's parent's house for the reunion.
But little did he know about the plan hatched by Sunghoon, Heeseung, and you. Jay had no idea of the surprise that awaited him at his parents' house and perhaps that was the fun of it all because everyone wanted to see how he would react when he arrived.
"What's up Jay, did you tell Y/n you were back early?" Heeseung was in the passenger seat, Sunghoon driving and Jay was comfortably in the back. The two in the front didn't want to show too much to their new friend.
"I sent her a message, but she won't be able to make it," he sighed tiredly, running one hand through his dark hair "Since I traveled to Italy, she went to her grandmother's house on the other side of the country. We were going to celebrate my birthday by Facetime, soā€¦"
"Oh, I'm sorry" he tried to send a sad smile ā€“ which he had rehearsed in the mirror with you and Sunghoon ā€“ because you had already told him that this would be Jay's answer when asked about you. Little did he know that his trip back had been part of the plan between Heeseung and Sunghoon, who wanted to do everything they could to get their friend back ahead of time.
Jay also had no idea that the trip to Italy had ended early thanks to the two friends in the car. They had expedited everything so that Jay would think he had finished things ahead of time and could return.
It had never been so easy to fool Park Jongseong, Sunghoon laughed the night before when he saw Jay's message telling him that he would probably make it back in time to spend his birthday with his friends.
The car journey continued with them catching up, Jay telling them about the things he'd done and hadn't managed to send a photo to his friends. Sunghoon wanted to scream when he talked about the sights he'd visited, making Jay promise to go back with the two of them so that he could show them everything he had to.
"And here we go" Sunghoon announced as soon as he stopped the car.
Jay's parents' house had always been very cozy, large, and bright. Jay remembered every moment he spent there with his two friends since high school. When they rang the doorbell to ask Jay to play video games, or when the three of them stayed out late at night on the front porch drinking beer and idealizing life after university.
That house had so many memories that Jay hadn't been able to stop smiling since he got back and was getting out of Sunghoon's car.
"We'll get your suitcase later, come on" he locked the car with the alarm after the three of them had left, letting Jay go ahead and walking very slowly so as not to spoil the surprise.
The plan was for him to get in first while Heeseung pretended to tie his sneakers in case Jay asked what was taking them so long, and Sunghoon would help him when Heeseung pretended to trip. Lucky for both of them, Jay just followed. Too eager to open the door to his parents' house.
"Wait for us, Jay!" Heeseung made sure to shout as loudly as he could to let Jay know he was near the door. The people inside the house were as quiet as possible so as not to spoil anything prematurely.
"You two are too slow, what's going on?" Jay turned quickly, seeing Sunghoon and Heeseung laughing as they slowly approached. Without missing a beat, Jay turned the handle and the door opened.
The cry of surprise caught in his throat as the house seemed much fuller than he would normally have thought. The balloons in the corners and his family and the rest of his friends were well positioned in the living room for the arrival of the ā€“ almost ā€“ birthday boy.
"Whatā€¦" he turned to the two behind him.
"Surprise, man" Sunghoon held Jay by the shoulders while Heeseung ruffled his hair, excited that it was finally over.
"Hi, my son" Jay's mother was the first to approach, hugging him as tightly as she could. Jay hugged her back lovingly, conveying in that gesture how much he missed his mother.
The moment was spent with Jay greeting his family, and hearing congratulations on his birthday, even if it was only a few hours away. But he would accept because, from the amount of booze he heard Heeseung say, no one would be sober until midnight to remember to congratulate him.
Jay finished hugging his friends and inevitably looked for you among all those people, even though he knew it would be impossible for you to be there. Not because of the way Heeseung had apologized for mentioning you in the car.
He quickly took his cell phone out of his pocket to text you and was surprised when he picked it up and your name flashed on the screen. You were finally calling him.
"Hey, my love" Jay didn't even wait to answer, immediately hearing your voice.
"Hey, almost birthday boy" he could have sworn his heart was floating just from hearing your voice and your laugh, two sounds he missed very much "How was the trip back?"
"Great, I'm finally home" he said, looking around as he saw his friends interacting with his family "Hee and Hoonie threw a surprise party for me."
"Oh, really?" you tried to hold back the urge to murmur cute things because he was telling you that, hardly knowing that things were still over "And how did it feel?"
"It would be better if you were here, to be honest" Jay found a secluded corner in the living room where no one would mind if he stayed while talking to you on the phone.
"I wanted to be there too, love" your voice was sad now, thanks to your role-playing with Jay's two best friends. Everything had to be perfect for him to believe it "But I can't miss your birthday, can I?"
"What do you mean?" Jay asked. Eyebrows knitted together in curiosity, he looked up when he heard Sunghoon shouting excitedly to Sunoo and Jake about something they could do later as a group.
"Let's go, shall we, Jay?" he heard Sunoo ask from afar, nodding in agreement even though he didn't know what it was about.
"I sent you a present, I hope Heeseung and Sunghoon took good care of it."
"Babe? Whatā€¦" Jay got up from the sofa to look for his friends, spotting Heeseung near one of his uncles and beckoning him over "What have you prepared for me, huh?"
"I can't tell you or it'll spoil the surprise."
"What?" Heeseung mumbled as he approached.
"Y/n said he has a surprise for me and it has help from you and Hoonie" Jay hadn't hung up the phone yet, knowing that you could hear the two friends talking.
"Hi, Y/n" Heeseung shouted enthusiastically and laughed when he heard, even low, your greeting to him "Okay, your present is outside."
"Outside?" Jay asked, not knowing if it was meant for you or Heeseung, but you both agreed at the same moment "Babe, what are you up to?"
"Getting up to something? Babe, I swear I did it with all my heart" Jay heard a noise behind your voice, as if you were fiddling with something, but as soon as he went to answer, the call ended.
"Shit" he looked at Heeseung and then at the cell phone with the call ended.
He'd asked Jay to call after he'd picked up the present, perhaps to tell you his reaction once he'd gotten it. Jay had no idea.
Walking up to the front door, he put his cell phone back in his pocket and opened the front door a little dejectedly. His eyes drooped even though it was for his surprise, but he didn't want to show how sad he was to have missed his call.
Or not. Now Jay was in complete shock. It wasn't possible that you were standing there in front of his parents' house.
"What the fuck?" Jay almost shouted.
"Oh" you pouted your lips, "I told you he wouldn't like the present, Heeseung."
Heeseung would have answered if it hadn't been for hurricane Jay, who burst through the door to take you in his arms. Hugging you tightly and spinning you around in the air.
Your laughter close to his ear was even better than over the phone, your voice calling his name was even more comforting than listening to you on a cell phone. Jay was on cloud nine.
"Howā€¦" he caught his breath after hugging you for long minutes, pulling his face away from your neck to meet your eyes as he leaned his forehead against yours "How did you all manage it?"
"Surprise you?" you asked, your warm hands running down Jay's cheeks and holding his face between your hands "Maybe because you deserve it after a long and tiring trip."
"I didn't know you were coming, I didn't know anything about it" Jay felt like running down the street shouting that this had been the best birthday of his entire life.
"We did our best to make everything perfect" you said.
"And it's only because I have you all with me" Jay whispered, sliding one hand around your waist and the other up to your face.
Finally he was able to feel your lips against his in a kiss he'd been needing ever since he got back. The taste of your lips and the gloss you were wearing mingled with his tongue as he rubbed the tip to ask for passage, soon tangling it against your tongue and pulling you even closer to him.
Jay wanted to eternalize this moment. Eternalize the vanilla-flavored kiss with a taste of longing that only you could provide.
"I love you so much" Jay whispered against your lips after he needed some air, but he didn't want to part with you so soon.
"I love you even more" you whispered back, kissing him again just in time to hear someone call his name from inside the house.
Now it was time to part, in fact, and intertwine our fingers in yours to enter the house.
"How about we start the party now before happy birthday?" Sunghoon stirred up the crowd, lifting a bottle of booze and filling a glass to hand out to anyone who felt like starting to drink.
Everyone celebrated together, wanting to start Jay's little surprise birthday party.
"I bet everyone's drunk by midnight" Jay leaned towards you to whisper, drawing a laugh from you.
In return, you leaned towards him to kiss him once more, accepting the glass Sunghoon had offered you when he passed you and Jay.
"Well, I bet they will be before then" you drank a little, handing the glass to Jay who also drank, choosing to share the alcohol with you so that neither of you would get drunk so quickly.
Looking around, Jay felt complete and fulfilled. He was lucky, and he wasn't even talking about having traveled out of the country a few days ago, but rather because he had something more valuable than any tourist spot: and that was all the people who were inhabiting his parents' house for his birthday at that moment.
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Ā©Ā ikeuverse,Ā 2024.Ā do not copy, translate or steal my stories.
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manestjerne Ā· 2 days
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I'll do that again for you
Pairing: Bucky Barnes x female reader
Summary: Bucky pushes you away again and you let him this time.
Word count: 3k
Warnings: angst, swearing, comfort, a little fluff, doubts, angry behavior, mentions of physical abuse and injuries, crying. Let me know if I forgot something.
A/N: I'm not sure about this one, but it's been on my mind for so long I had to finally sit down and write it all down. Hope you enjoy it guys <3
I walked into Buckyā€™s apartment and tossed my keys on the dining table before opening the fridge and getting myself a bottle of water. I looked around slowly and walked to the pile of bedsheets on the floor. I picked them up before sitting down on the couch. The quiet sound of shower in the other room seemed to wash all my worries away, but I knew they will come back the moment I see him. His deep blue, tired eyes full of regret and and guilt, his usually steady hands shaking whenever we were alone. All the things no one else besides me was allowed to see. Things that only I could perceive in a conference room full of people. Things I couldnā€™t do anything about. He was more devastated than ever when Steve started talking about leaving him. Leaving us, but Bucky couldnā€™t wrap his head around that, believing I have already found my peace in other people. As compassionate as he was, he never saw how lonely I was since I was trying to get him his life back. But I never blamed him.Ā 
The peaceful sound of water flowing got quiet unexpectedly, making me snap back to reality. I heard quiet footsteps getting closer and my heart started pounding in my chest.Ā 
ā€žHey sweets, youā€™re here early.ā€Ā 
He said calmly, sitting on the couch next to me. I only replied with a smile, realizing he looks worse than usually. He wasnā€™t surprised I was here, I always were on friday mornings. We talked about his last therapy session before going to the compound together, it was our routine. The thing that kept us both on tracks, helping to get a steady rhythm in our messed up lives, something to stick with for once. But today my thoughts were focused on something else, I didnā€™t care about the therapy, knowing he might finally found something better to help him get his life together.Ā 
ā€žHow was your date yesterday?ā€
ā€žIt was awful and I donā€™t want to talk about itā€Ā 
His reply was dry and harsh. He didnā€™t to that often while talking to me. He had a soft spot there, always treating me gently and respectful, but I knew this moment would come, sooner or later. I knew the perfect bubble of our strange relationship would finally burst, because he couldnā€™t handle it. I knew it would change for him, but never for me, I felt the same way since I met him, when he squeezed my throat so hard that I passed out and had to look at the bruises covering my body for the next two weeks whenever I passed a mirror. But even as a Winter Soldier, his eyes were the same, thatā€™s why I chose to help Steve get him back. Thatā€™s why I had the worst possible fight with Tony, when he told me I canā€™t just pick up assassins from the streets and adopt them like stray cats. He never said that about Wanda, he never called Nat an assassin, but he never hesitated when it came to Bucky. Thinking about that sent shivers down my spine, remembering how much I had to give up to bring things back to normal, to help them understand that the Winter Soldier is not the person standing in front of them.
ā€žSo I chose a wrong person again?ā€Ā 
I asked with a weak smile. It wasnā€™t the first date he didnā€™t enjoy, but he never blamed me for that.
ā€žYou chose the wrong thing for me, I donā€™t get why do you want me to find a fucking love of my life by setting me up on hookups I donā€™t want to attend.ā€
His voice started to sound unsettling, I shifted in my seat and straightened my back, looking at him carefully. He tried to do that earlier, to push me away by scaring me, but I never let him. I knew he would never hurt me, too focused on protecting me at all costs, like his life depended on it.
ā€žDonā€™t be such a dick and stop blaming me for your poor love life, Iā€™m just trying to help you get back to reality.ā€
I was surprised by my own words, I never spoke to him that way, no matter how he treated me. I felt a wave of frustration flushing through my veins, making me feel like my blood is boiling. I looked at his hands, his metal fingers clenching in a fist, the flesh hand rubbing on the soft fabric of his jeans, but I knew how much they were trembling at this moment and how much he was fighting himself not to break the character he was trying to play.Ā 
ā€žI never asked for it.ā€
His jaw clenched and I felt a sting in my chest at his words. No matter how grateful he was for me being there, he would never admit it, he would never say how much he needed and appreciated all I ever did for him.Ā 
ā€žDo you want me to leave?ā€Ā 
I decided to make it easier for him, knowing he would struggle with saying it out loud. He never wanted me to leave his side, but he thought it was the right thing, and I couldnā€™t fight it anymore.
ā€žI donā€™t want you to play a babysitter anymore, seeing one shrink at a time is enough.ā€Ā 
He huffed and rolled his eyes, almost making me believe his words and for the first time I felt some kind of doubt. My safe place by his side was slowly fading away as he kept looking at me with something what felt like blame in his eyes. I shrinked into my seat trying to find any words, but every time I opened my mouth the room was filled with nothing but silence.Ā 
ā€žDo you want me to leave?ā€Ā 
I repeated myself quietly, not able to find any other words suitable for what I was feeling at the moment.
ā€žAre you even fucking listening?ā€
He wasnā€™t angry, but frustrated. I didnā€™t flinch at his voice, but I could feel the tears filling up my eyes slowly. I got up and picked my keys up from the table. After a few short breaths I found the courage to face him again.
ā€žThatā€™s what I do all the time, James. I listen. I wish you could do that for once.ā€
With my last word I turned away and walked to the door. He never tried to stop me, he didnā€™t say anything before I left. I held my tears back for as long as I could, letting go at the moment I sat in my car. I doubted all I did for him at the moment, knowing that one of us wasnā€™t ready for what we were doing, but I couldnā€™t realize who was the problem.
-----
ā€žItā€™s been a week since you stopped attending the meetings. If Tony was mad earlier, you donā€™t want to know what Steve said today.ā€
Nat entered my room without knocking as always. She brought me a piece of Wandaā€™s cake, but I pushed the plate away, still refusing to eat whenever I wasnā€™t starving.
ā€žI really just donā€™t want to see him, Iā€™m not ready for that.ā€
She sat on the bed next to me, looking at me closely and sinking every word I said. It was the first time I said anything about what happened that day and she was willing to listen carefully to every word I say, analyzing every sigh and deep breath between them. I felt bad about treating her this way, she deserved to know everything, but I was scared of what I was going to say, I tried not to think about it, knowing my pain is now fully replaced with anger and frustration.
ā€žI did everything I could, all this months I tried to help him and he acts like a fucking brat, trying to push me away. Iā€™m so done with him, Iā€™m not going back and begging him to let me do that all again. If heā€™s so devoted to Steve letā€™s just stick with that and let him live his pathetic little life without my interruptions.ā€Ā 
I said it all in one breath trying not to sound paranoid, but Nat only nodded slowly and laid on her back, staring at the perfectly white ceiling.Ā 
ā€žI respect your every decision, but heā€™s only doing that to help you, and you know that. Itā€™s you, who convinced me he means no harm and just canā€™t deal with his own mind, thatā€™s why heā€™s trying to push you away. But itā€™s okay youā€™re tired with that, you donā€™t deserve it.ā€
I rolled on my stomach laying next to her and picked up the plate she put on the bed earlier. I stared at all the layers of my favorite toppings and saw how uneven it was looking, realizing Natasha helped Wanda with cooking this time. I smiled to myself remembering how much she hates doing that.Ā 
"Just wait for him to come back, he'll do it eventually."
ā€žThanks Nat, Iā€™m glad youā€™re here.ā€Ā 
I said before dipping my fork in the cake.
---
Everyone got quiet when I entered the shared kitchen, it was the first time I was in the same room with Bucky since I left his apartment in tears. But I didnā€™t mind his presence, I knew heā€™s not going to bring it up when there were so many people around and I wasnā€™t planning on giving him a chance to speak to me in private. I walked up to the counter and poured myself a glass of water before heading to the coffee machine. I waited for my drink to brew when I turned away and rested my elbows on the counter behind me, almost tasting the tensed atmosphere I brought into the room.Ā 
ā€žAre you planning on attending any meetings this week or should I just send you a fax with our arrangements?ā€Ā 
Tony asked calmly. He was mad at me, but acting as a human as possible he wasnā€™t planning on letting me know.
ā€žYeah, Iā€™ll be there today.ā€
I shrugged my shoulders when Steve rolled his eyes, but I wasnā€™t looking at him. Buckyā€™s eyes were glued to the countertop in front of him, filled with guilt. He looked pathetic and I blamed myself for enjoying the view. After hearing a quiet beep my eyes left him to pick up the coffee.
ā€žSee you at 6.ā€
I said and started walking away lazily with mug in one hand and a glass of water in another. I was slowly getting used to this, feeling more comfortable leaving my room, not caring about the stares.
ā€žYou two should just fuck and let us get back to normal.ā€
I froze at Tonyā€™s words and turned back to face him unconsciously.
ā€žCome on, we can all see how youā€™re looking at each other, letā€™s finally get over this awkward phase.ā€
ā€žShut up.ā€Ā 
Bucky replied him firmly at his next words, but Tony just shrugged his shoulders and went back to eating his cereal. I tightened my grip on the glass in my hand and looked him in the eyes, shaking my head slowly. Little did he know, we did that once, a few weeks back and it never helped, it never changed our relationship. I couldnā€™t find proper words to respond so I just walked away and stopped after passing the first corner, when no one could see me. I let my head fall back and took a few deep breaths, feeling the almost healed wound open up again. I started walking away when I heard footsteps approaching me, but he was faster and caught up with me after only a few seconds. He blocked my way with his body, towering over me before I could reach the elevator and hide in my room.Ā 
ā€žHe shouldnā€™t have said that, Iā€™m sorry.ā€Ā 
Bucky was trying to look me in the eyes but I successfully avoided it.
ā€žDonā€™t act like you regret anything.ā€
I huffed and tried to pass him, but it was impossible. He raised his hand to tuck the strand of hair behind my ear but I flinched at his movement. He was visibly hurt by that, but not surprised, taking a step back his gaze never left me.Ā 
ā€žCan we just talk like adult people do?ā€
ā€žYouā€™re not so good at that.ā€
I replied coldly, matching his earlier energy, trying to push him away as he did so many times.
ā€žI am, you taught me that.ā€
ā€žNo, thatā€™s a job for a shrink, so Iā€™m not doing that again.ā€
ā€žI know how you fee-ā€ž
ā€žNo, you fucking donā€™t!ā€
I replied throwing a glass at him, my words louder than necessary. He didnā€™t flinch, knowing I wasnā€™t actually aiming at him. The glass flew next to his face and shattered at the wall behind him.Ā 
ā€žFuck.ā€Ā 
I mumbled and dropped on my knees to pick up the glass from the floor. He kneeled besides me and pulled me away gently, grabbing the shattered pieces with his metal hand.Ā 
ā€žYouā€™ll hurt yourself.ā€
He said gently and I almost fell in his arms after these words, knowing how much I miss him and how much I want to be allowed to do that again.Ā 
ā€žLike you care.ā€
I huffed in response and entered the elevator leaving him alone, kneeling in the puddle wetting his jeans, letting my frustration take over.
-----
I heard a soft knocking on my door. I raised myself on my elbows before realizing Nat and Wanda never knock, no matter what time they decide to come see me, so I rolled over with my back facing the door now. I didnā€™t want to talk to anybody else at the moment.
ā€žI know youā€™re not sleeping, I can hear your uneven breath.ā€
I heard the words clearly, even tho his whisper was muffled by the door separating us. I didnā€™t respond, knowing heā€™ll come in eventually. I heard a resigned sigh before the door opened. His quiet footsteps echoing in my head when he circled the room and kneeled besides my bed to face me.Ā 
ā€žIā€™m sorry for being such a dick.ā€
He said confidently waiting for my answer, but also knowing Iā€™m not going to speak. He gave me a few seconds to make sure I donā€™t have anything to say before he spoke up again.
ā€žI know how you feel, I can see how much you have to give up in order to help me. I know how alone you are, even with so many people supporting you. I know you did it all to make me feel better and I appreciate it more than anything, I need your help just as much as you think and more.ā€
I was a little confused at his words, actually admitting all the things he couldnā€™t say earlier.
ā€žThen why are you like that?ā€
I felt the tears filling up my eyes again, but I didnā€™t care, letting them fall on my cheeks as our murmurs were filling up the quiet room.Ā 
ā€žBecause I canā€™t stand watching you do this. You donā€™t deserve it, I donā€™t deserve you, but I canā€™t function without you. I need you back and Iā€™ll do everything for you to forgive me again.ā€
His hand slowly landed on my cheek, wiping the tears away as he looked me in the eyes.
ā€žSee, thatā€™s the problem. Again. How many times will you push me away before finally opening up and letting me really help you?ā€
My voice wasnā€™t shaking as much, feeling his touch calmed me down as always, no matter how I wanted to resist the feeling.
ā€žI wonā€™t do that ever again, I wonā€™t hurt you. I just need you back, as clingy as always, being a pain in my ass every Friday morning, asking about my therapy. Making me watch all the stupid romantic movies, cuddling on the couch when Iā€™m trying to move away. Dragging me back to bed when I lay on the floor and making me talk about my nightmares before we fall asleep again.ā€
"Who would think that Bucky Barns could ever kneel before a woman."
"And I'll do it again for you."
I couldnā€™t help but giggled at his words, knowing how much I miss that feeling too, no matter he was trying to act like he hates it, he loved it more than I did. He smiled softly at my reaction, and I knew it was sincere. He slowly stood up and took the covers off me. Picking me up gently he moved me to make space for himself and laid next to me, resting my head on his chest before pulling the covers over us once more.
ā€žJust come back for the last time and I promise I wonā€™t act like a brat and start treating you as you deserve. I would do anything for you and I canā€™t run from it anymore. Iā€™m ready to give you everything I can and finally take care of you, like you did this whole time.ā€
He brushed his fingers through my hair and I nodded slowly, knowing he finally understood that pushing me away is not an option. I took a deep breath smelling his cologne and my eyelids got heavy as my body started to relax. I closed my eyes sinking in the feeling of our bodies being so close again, our legs tangled under the duvet, his heart beating right where my head was resting.Ā 
ā€žJust close your eyes now, and weā€™ll start everything again tomorrow, okay?ā€
He asked quietly, his flesh hand not leaving my hair and the metal once still drawing circles on my back.
ā€žOkay.ā€
I said before falling asleep, knowing I wonā€™t wake up in the middle of the night as I did every time for the past week.Ā 
159 notes Ā· View notes
steddiecameraroll Ā· 2 days
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ā€œWhatever, now heā€™s just somebody that I used to know.ā€ Steve shakes his head in annoyance.
Dustin wonā€™t let it go. Heā€™s still trying to get Steve to go with him to visit Eddie. As if he wants to travel across state lines to visit his ex boyfriend. Ex being the keyword.
ā€œYeah but he used to be your boyfriend. Come on, Steve. Eddie would be so surprised.ā€
ā€œNo shit. Iā€™m sure heā€™d throw open the door and just be so elated to see me standing there. Toss his arms up and cheer with glee.ā€ Steve swears Dustin better hear the sarcasm dripping from his tone.
ā€œHe will! I swear.ā€
ā€œHave you absolutely lost it? Do you not remember how he broke up with me? He sent Jeff to my place to pick up his shit. Couldnā€™t even bother to do it himself. Then he changed his fucking number, Dustin. Does that sound like someone that would be happy to see me? He couldnā€™t risk the tiny chance that I would reach out to him. He went far enough to avoid me that he moved and didnā€™t say a fucking thing. So no, I wonā€™t be joining you on this lovely weekend trip to Chicago. And for the love of god, stop asking me.ā€ He punctuates his point by slamming the refrigerator door shut.
ā€œSorry, ok, Iā€™ll stop.ā€
Steve glares over his shoulder at the boy. He canā€™t believe Dustin could have forgotten how painful their break up had been for Steve. Eddie dumping him out of the blue and subsequently disappearing like none of it meant anything to him. As if their relationship was just a smudge to be wiped away with a damp cloth.
Steveā€™s just made it to the angry stage of it all and for Dustin to completely disregard his feelings is especially crushing. He knows their relationship veers closer to a sibling connection. Itā€™s why Dustinā€™s usual prodding doesnā€™t drive him as crazy as it does others but there is a time and place, and the subject matter of Eddie Munson is never an option. Not to Steve at least.
ā€œI just thought-ā€œ
ā€œDonā€™t,ā€ Steve cuts the boy off. ā€œItā€™s over. Iā€™ve accepted it, you should too.ā€
Dustin nods silently with a twist to his mouth.
ā€œI beg you, never speak to me about him ever again. If he wants to act like I donā€™t exist, then I get to do the same thing.ā€
ā€œNo, but Steve, thatā€™s not- he asks about you all the time!ā€ Dustin rushes out before Steve can strangle him.
Steve whips around scowling at the boy. ā€œThatā€™s not funny.ā€
ā€œIā€™m not, no, he does! I swear, Steve.ā€ Dustin rushes to keep up pace with Steve when he turns heel and rushes out of the kitchen.
ā€œStop it,ā€ Steve grits out.
ā€œI swear on my mother. Every time I call him he asks how youā€™re doing. Or what classes youā€™re taking. Or how your new job is.ā€
Steveā€™s fingers are digging into his palms as he fists his hands at his sides. Heā€™s trying so hard not to lose his shit right now. Heā€™s breathing heavy as Dustin stomps behind him down the hallway.
ā€œI swear, just come with me. He misses you.ā€
ā€œSHUT UP,ā€ Steve spins around and yells in Dustinā€™s face. ā€œNo he doesnā€™t! No he doesnā€™t! If he did then he wouldnā€™t have done it. He wouldnā€™t have left without saying a word. He wouldnā€™t have ripped my heart out and destroyed me.ā€ Steveā€™s anger is fizzing over into sorrow and he knows heā€™s failing at keeping the tears at bay.
ā€œSteve?ā€ Dustinā€™s voice cracks.
ā€œNO!ā€ Steve throws his finger in Dustinā€™s face. ā€œI donā€™t want to hear it. I loved him and he betrayed me. He means nothing to me now. Nothing. Do you understand?ā€ Dustin nods nervously. ā€œHeā€™s just some guy, now.ā€
Steve sighs with a heavy heart. Every muscle in his body is immediately exhausted. He thought he was done having to think about Eddie Munson. Thought he was past the point of letting the man get to him but here he is shaking profusely and on the verge of breaking down because Dustin is asking him to go on a road trip.
ā€œDustin, please.ā€ Steve asks shakily. Heā€™s so close to tears. ā€œIf you care about me even a little, you wonā€™t do this to me. You donā€™t understand. He was just your friend, brother in arms and all. He was my-,ā€ Steve chokes back the lump in his throat. ā€œHe was my everything. And if what youā€™re saying is true, then Eddie can try and fix this himself. He can get in his fucking piece of shit van and drive his goddamn ass back here and tell me himself. Iā€™m the victim here. He did this so he can fix it. Now get out.ā€
ā€œSteve,ā€ Dustin pleads.
ā€œNo. Get. Out.ā€
Dustin nods solemnly then shuffles around gathering his things, and leaving Steve alone a few minutes later. Once Steve hears the front door close with a soft click, he collapses onto his couch and cries into one of the throw pillows.
194 notes Ā· View notes
thewertsearch Ā· 13 hours
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GG: i think you are projecting your own attitude on to others [ā€¦] GG: rose just sent me a code for a crystal ball, shes my friend and is basically the best! [ā€¦] CA: its probably a trap i wwouldnt trust her CA: she is a cunnin and treacherous sort trust me i knoww her type GG: wait do you have a thing for her too??? GG: did she reject you or something?
Annihilate him, Jade. This would be a good time to unleash that rage you've been cultivating.
CA: all of her FRAUDULENT MAGICS cannot come close to posin threat to my mastery ovver the TRUEST SCIENCES CA: an wwith my empiricists wwand i servve as the righteous hope that wwill incinerate delusion and the deluded alike
This dude's on some Methods of Rationality type shit.
I'm not sure why Eridan is on a crusade against magic. He's been insisting it was fake since his original introduction page, and it's pretty clear he has some sort of complex about it. Is there some unseen history here that we're not yet privy to?
GG: wow what are you talking about CA: so really you should be honored to inherit my old callin CA: both my armaments and my feud
To be fair to Eridan, he is accomplishing something useful here, even if it's by accident. Jade needs to get that rifle in her pen-pal's hands in order to fulfil the Endgame Bunny's time loop.
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Recalling Eridanā€™s introduction reminds me that this is one of the most powerful riflekind weapons in existence. This should imply that top-tier weapons cost tens of millions of grist...
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...but we just saw a weapon that costs much, much more.
Maybe the Proton Cannon has the same damage as the Crosshairs, but it also has an incredibly broken non-combat use.
GG: i have seen this before [ā€¦] GG: i am very sure its the same rifle included with johns present [ā€¦] CA: probably a cheap imitation of the original [ā€¦] GG: i did not provide the weapons! GG: my penpal did [ā€¦] GG: we worked on it together but he supplied the bunnys weapons GG: im pretty sure hes from the future! CA: wwhy GG: because he said hes my grandson
Really?
I suppose being raised by a Sburb veteran would explain why he uses terms like 'boonbuck' in casual speech - but almost nothing else makes sense when viewed through this lens.
If Pen-Pal is Jade's grandson, then he should be from decades in the future - presumably long after the game has ended. This doesn't sound like a problem, until you remember some of the references he made.
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As much as it pains me to admit it, the Earth is probably gone for good - which means that any descendants of our Players will be raised somewhere else. Why would someone presumably raised in a completely different universe be so familiar with Earth's culture?
You could argue that he picked up his love of Earth movies from one of the surviving Earthlings, such as adult John - although that raises its own issues, because PP talks to John like he's never met him before. Maybe he died young, and passed his love of movies to PP posthumously - but as you can see, we're really having to stretch things to make this make sense.
Plus, there's an even bigger problem - namely, his 1920s 'accent'. None of the surviving Earthlings have it, and it's not like he just developed it spontaneously. If he was raised by Jade or her child, why does he talk like her grandfather would?
See, I'm still sure that PP is connected directly to Grandpa, and may well be the man himself - which means either PP is lying, or there's something more complicated going on here.
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We don't know anything about Grandpa's life after he fled the Crocker household. If he was somehow raised by an adult, post-Sburb Jade, then he could consider her his grandmother, while still talking and acting like the Grandpa Harley we know. Plus, it would explain why he acts like he's from the past, but knows about the future. He already has a history of time travelling - maybe he's been doing it since he was a kid.
Similar to my old theory about Spades Slick, this one is a little too convoluted to be 100% true - but still I think there's something to this idea. Being raised by Jade would neatly explain where he got the bunny's weapons...
Ugh, I don't know! This Pen-Pal really is the biggest curveball this comic has thrown at me. I need to think it over some more.
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dotthings Ā· 2 days
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Oh, this moment on the Jensen and Rob panel at Jib14 made me so happy.
Jensen: If every time they hurt Dean, they hit his heart, they hit his chest?ā€¦Oh like a heart attack? Gosh Iā€™ve never thought about that. Thatā€™s a really interesting likeā€¦pick up. Maybe. Thatā€™s a writer question, thatā€™s a good question. That was never something that was conveyed to me, that was never something that was told to me, that weā€™re going to attack Deanā€™s heart the most and itā€™s because heā€™s got the biggest heart. But itā€™s a really good kind of perception or perspective on the story and I think it might have been one of those happy accidents that it happened that way, maybe subconsciously to the writers and probably subconsciously to me, if you want to get Dean, thatā€™s where you get him. And it makes senseā€¦.thank youā€¦now Iā€™m going to think about that for the rest of the day! Thanks a lot! Rob: That was like poetry. Jensen: That was beautiful.
Although, I doubt it wasn't on purpose on the part of the writers--we've seen the symmetry on spn, we've seen how it rhymes. Although I'm sure there are a few things where they'd do it the first time, and then realize how that came across symbolically, and then keep leaning into it, because that's how creative process sometimes work. (Just saying, fandom leans way too hard into the assumption everything good on spn was accidental instead of understanding, no it wasn't, but accidents are part of the creative process, too). There's deliberate reasons Death went for Dean's heart in 15.18, for example.
Anyway I appreciate Jensen's comment here and the fan's analysis and Jensen's appreciation of their analysis and Jensen's idea that it was subconsciously in his own mind even if he didn't think about it that way himself before. Because Dean has a really big heart, and "if you want to get to Dean, that's where you get him." Bingo.
LOL poor Jensen caught Dean feelings. His faux grumpiness about it absolutely sent me. Yes, same Jensen. We do this to each other in fandom all the time. Now I've caught Dean feelings too, thanks a lot Jensen, now I'm going to think about this for the rest of the evening!!! And I'm going to spread the Dean feelings just by making this post!!! Jensen has to suffer Dean feelings, so do we!!!
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prongsiepotter Ā· 1 day
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sunbathing by the black lake | j. potter
summary: your childhood best friend james is being a little shit but in an endearing sort of way while showing his little acts of love
pairing: james potter x childhood bsf!reader
a/n: my first time writing on this blog!! i have a childhood friends to lovers playlist on spotify if anyone wants to listen to it bc i have a feeling itā€™s all iā€™ll write abt lol would really appreciate some feedback! enjoy x
ā”€ā”€ā”€ā”€ā”€ā”€ā”€ā”€ ā‚ ā€§ā‚ŠĀ°
There's no way to explain how the energy shifts when James is around. It simply does. Just like how you can feel the sun beating down on you right now. Hence, you can sense his approach without as much as a glance at him, your gaze continuing to drift across the notes Remus left for you in the margins of your essay.
James knows that, of course, as he strides across the grass towards you. You have never really talked about it, but seeing how he can also just tell when you're about to enter a room he's in, you both have made it a habit to not announce your presence. There's just no need.
So when he plops down next to you and rests his chin on your shoulder like it's his birthright, neither of you is surprised. In fact, itā€™s just right. Like puzzles slotting in perfectly.
For a few minutes, the world consists of birds chirping, a warm breeze, and the distant laughter of a group of Hufflepuff girls sitting a few paces away. You flip the page and let out a huff of laughter. James chuckles, his voice low and right next to your ear as he says, "Wouldn't be Moony if everything he touches didn't have a chocolate stain on it."
"It's like he's marking his territory." You try to rub it off with your sleeve, but the smudge only gets bigger. You squint and hold the paper in front of you, trying to discern if it's that noticeable (it is) but with a shrug you decide you couldn't care less. The movement makes James' glasses slide down to the tip of his nose, and he leans forward to make a dramatic face at you as if you had done him deeply wrong. With a playful eye-roll, you push them back for him and get a signature James Potter smile in return.
"Cheers, love." He beams at you and retrieves a balled-up napkin from the inside of his robe before taking it off. You watch him roll up the sleeves of his white Oxford shirt to his elbows, placing the mystery napkin on your lap. You glance at it curiously. "Unwrap it," he says. "It's for you."
Doing as you're told, you perk up with excitement when the content reveals itself. "Effie sent them?" You hold up the mangled piece of apple crumble like it's the most sacred thing you have ever gotten to hold, which it is. James nods, smiling at your happy dance. "I love her apple crumbles. Thank you!"
"You love everything my mum bakes," he says while lying down on his side, right in front of you with his head propped up on his palm. There's a glimmer in his amber eyes.
You give him a pointed look.
"Because everything that lovely woman bakes is the most scrumptious and amazing thing to exist." You take a big bite from the apple crumble to prove your point and your eyes flutter close as you hum. "This is why we're friends, Potter," you say with a mouthful. "No other reason. This is it."
"Oh yeah?" You hear the amusement in the drawl of his voice. Then he cups the side of your face and you look down at him as he distractedly brushes off some crumbs from the corner of your mouth. He looks up at the sky. "That's a shame because this is the last time you will get anything my mum has baked."
James' gaze is still turned upward, giving the sky his utmost interest as if to check if it's still blue. You stare at him in bewilderment. "Are you insane? Why would you deprive me of Effie's food?"
"I wonder how the weather will be tomorrow," he responds flippantly, and you swear your eye twitches.
"Oh, I'm sorry," you say, narrowing your eyes at him. "I forgot you were satan's spawn."
James does not react. You donā€™t think he will even reply with the way how heā€™s squinting and examining the very much non-existent clouds in the clear sky. But then he looks at you like you had asked him to solemnly share his meteorology findings with you, and with undeserved earnestness he tells you, "I think tomorrow will be just as sunny as today."
You blink at him. Then give a long-suffering sigh. "I thought you cared about me."
"I do," James says, rolling over to lay on his back with his eyes closed. "Which is why I can't have you lose your mind over some flour and sugar. I'm doing us a favour. Preserving our friendship." He cracks an eye open to look at you. "We've been friends since diapers, not because of my mumā€™s food, but because I'm brilliant and extremely lovable. Get your facts straight, woman."
You toss the napkin at his face.
He laughs.
Glancing at the last piece of the apple crumble in your hand, you ask, "Do you want it?"
James shakes his head, looking fond. "You assault me and then offer me the last bite?"
"Force of habit," you say flatly. "I can take it back."
He chuckles and takes off his glasses, resting his arm over his eyes. "You can have it, love. Cheers."
You don't have to be told twice and pop it happily in your mouth. With his other arm, he sweeps the scattered pages aside and pats the spot next to him. "Sleep with me?"
You quirk a brow. "Trying to get into my knickers, Potter?"
A breathy laughter escapes his lips. "Are you offering?"
"You wish."
"Merlin, yes." He sighs dramatically as if all James Potter has known in this lifetime was the pain of longing. He grabs blindly for you and pulls lightly at the hem of your skirt. "A man can dream. But for now just nap with me, yea?"
You bat at his wrist but let him pull you towards him nonetheless. There was never any other option, really.
In the blink of a moment, you're nestled into Jamesā€™ side. His arm is cushioning your head, fingers absentmindedly playing with your hair as he tells you his thoughts on a book he recently read because he knew you liked it. You listen intensely, enjoying the easy conversation and the sunlight warming your skin. The world feels peaceful, and it doesn't take long before sleep pulls you both into a cosy slumber.
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buckttommy Ā· 2 days
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When buck screams tommys name in distress, how would you like it to happen?
well. so. obviously tommy gets hurt on the job and obviously buck witnesses it. i don't know how it happens, necessarily. i know 911 said they didn't necessarily want to do big wildfires out of respect for the fact that they have big wildfires in california, but that's the only thing i can think of, like. i don't know if you've seen the og/ls crossover episode (i'm going to assume you have) but having all these firefighters together.. it's the most time buck and tommy have ever spent together while on the job. they do little check-ins with each other throughout the days as the week stretches on, just to make sure they're safe, just to make sure they're coping well. they never do anything more than kiss and hold each other for a couple minutes in a dark/quite corner of one of the sleep tents, both because they're exhausted and because it's definitely not the time or place, but. it's enough. you know?
and so. about eight days into the wildfire, a group of firefighters goes missing. they're completely unresponsive, and that's a bad sign, so tommy's unit has to fly in to go get them. when buck learns tommy's flying out for this specific rescue, he's anxious as hell. that area he's flying out to went bad days ago, visibility is shit, and the group of firefighters that stopped responding was the last group that was ever going to be sent out before the whole area was going to be considered too far gone to save. so he's nervous. scared shitless, actually. but tommy just pulls him aside and he smiles that warm, loving, reassuring smile of his. kisses him and says, "don't worry i'll be okay, everything is okay" and he's scared too, buck can see it in his eyes, but he kisses him back hard and long and just tells him, like, "come home safe to me, ok?" and it's a request but it's also a demand. tommy has to come home. there's no other option. not one that buck can survive, at least.
so tommy goes away and buck/the rest of the 118/some others are is deployed to an area that's pretty close to where tommy is supposed to be flying overhead. after a while, buck gets into a rhythm, so he doesn't think (much) about tommy and just focuses on the task at hand and what he has to do. and then at some point, he hears a chopper overhead and he's so relieved... up until the moment that he notices something is very fucking wrong. he doesn't know what, exactly, but the helicopter is going down and he can't fucking breathe and it is has nothing to do with the smoke. and buck, like.... it'd be one thing if he was hearing about it after the fact, you know? if he heard about it after, he'd be spared the sheer, lifechanging panic of what it looks like to see his world collapse in real time. but he's actually standing there, and he's witnessing the love of his fucking life go down in a wildfire and. so. yeah. he screams tommy's name at the top of his lungs. he's not even aware that he's doing it, tbh. it's completely involuntary, a byproduct of watching this person he loves so much literally die (so he thinks). and there are arms around his waist (he doesn't know whose, but they feel like eddie's) holding him back to keep from running, and someone's talking into a radio (bobby maybe?) but everything is just. it's chaos. his head his chaos, his heart stopped beating ages ago and now he's just. dead. just dead and waiting for, praying for a miracle he's not sure will ever comeā€”
(and. so. obviously tommy is fine. buck doesn't actually, like, learn this fact until several hours later when he is already so firmly entrenched in the deepest depression/state of grief he has ever been in in his life (and considering he watched eddie get shot in front of him, saw a bridge collapse on top of bobby, and his sister was kidnapped presumed dead, that's saying a LOT). but then tommy staggers into the tent and buck absolutely falls the fuck apart. like. tommy barely gets a step inside before buck is on himā€”before they're on each other, actuallyā€”and. like. he's not okay at all. like. he's injured and should definitely 100% be on his way to the hospital. but he knew, okay? tommy kinard knows his boy and he knew what kind of state he would be in. so yeah, stopping by to see him was a no brainer. their reunion only lasts a couple minutes before tommy's body starts to give out on him and, like, yeah, hospital now. but. buck goes with him, and he doesn't leave his side once except when tommy goes through surgery and... everything is not okay but neither of them had the worst day of their lives and that's all buck could ever ask for.)
(and if they finally tell each other they love each other when tommy gets out of surgery and comes out from under the haze of anesthesia. well. that's just between them)
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aristotlecoyote Ā· 1 day
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Nah but my guys.
This shit
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Is inexcusable. Any of you supporting them when those attached to them say *this* after gloating about a 115 dollar bag *for their honey moon*
And saying they are barely surviving and having trouble making content
Dont deserve your respect as a viewer.
This comment is a glimpse at their true natures whether you like it or not.
This isnt a hate attack. I have an inherent respect for life and the humans that live it. I respect that they are humans that do whatever they want of their own free will. Like yeah spend money. Do things. Live your life buy a house eat good healthy food.
But that is all a privilege. A privilege not many people have at the moment??
I am privileged. I work for my family as a caretaker(paid for by the state btw. My parents can not afford to pay me other wise). I cant buy my own food. I make "too much" to have food stamps. I live off of what my parents, who are also struggling, can provide. I live with my parents at 27 because working conditions and living conditions are so bad and i am so mentally ill i cant be on my own for my own *safety*. Just because i am able to live in relative comfort by the grace of my safety net doesnt mean ive always had that grace. And many *many* more people in the world dont even have the safety net that kept me off the street. I stole food from my old roommates because i was hungry and couldnt afford food. I was feeding my dog *my* food because i couldnt buy his food. I am 5,000 dollars in debt because i couldn't afford health insurance and went to the ER because i was going to end my life. I couldnt pay the 260 dollar bill i was sent so i just hoped and prayed it would go away and now its eating me.
I am also bad with money even when all my bills are paid.
I bought merch. I bought tickets to the live show. I did that because i paid my bills once and had enough to feed my addiction to solving my depression with buying tiny useless things. I know its not a good fucking idea. I know it is but im sure someone out there understands that you cant always control yourself when you arent fully present in your own life. I cant even leave the house because i *know* ill spend money and i *know* i cant.
And i thought i was supporting people who cared about their fans enough to atleast not say stuff like this.
I was staying subscribed to the youtube channel out of the hope that they would change their mind, see reason? Maybe?
But they wont.
This shows that they wont. That they refuse. That all good faith worries and criticisms mean nothing to them because We cant pay them to care.
So yeah. @wearewatcher @watcherfans these are the people you want to be and support, huh? Positivity is nice when you arent eating ramen. When you arent skipping meals to make yourself feel better for living off your equally struggling family. When you have enough around you to feel safe and secure enough to pay for something that isnt even worth the money you put in.
This isnt a post to get pity. This is a post to put in perspective the reality working class people face. What poor people face. What disabled people, who cant even marry or grow savings, face.
Please. Just think of humans as people and not just money and art.
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dyns33 Ā· 2 days
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Family respect
Alfie and his Shelby wife are back for more adventures.
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"He's back." was the first thing Ada said to her when she picked up the phone, and that was enough for Y/N to understand who she was talking about.
If she had hardly known her mother, who died when she was young, she had not really known her father well either, while he was still alive.
The relationship between Arthur Shelby Sr. and his family had always been complicated. Long before Y/N was found by Polly when she was still a child, abandoned in an orphanage.
It had been luck or fate that her father quickly spoke of her in a letter sent to his sister, writing that he had made a little mistake during a trip. That was what he named Y/N, his little mistake.
The rest of Shelby didn't see her that way. They had adored her from the moment they saw the girl, welcoming her as if she had always been there, as if they had the same mother, and protecting her against this drunken and tyrannical father.
There was still respect for the elders. This notion was important to the romani, and some therefore found it difficult to completely rebel against the man despite his many faults.
This was especially difficult for Arthur. He admired him when he was younger, and even though he often stood up for his brothers and sisters, he blindly followed him in all his dangerous plans.
He had often gotten into trouble because of their father. Tommy was very angry with him for that.
This naivety was undoubtedly one of the reasons why it was not Arthur who managed the family affairs even though he was the oldest.
He never complained about it. As he followed their father, he followed Thomas without question, recognizing that his little brother was smarter, more stubborn, better at business and discussion.
But the few times their father had passed through Birmingham again, he had criticized this absurd hierarchy, and even if Arthur eventually bowed his head to Tommy, there were always several days when he was at their father's side, ready to believe that he had changed.
ā€œWhere is Thomas ?ā€ Y/N asked her sister, because she didn't want to hear more about their father at the moment.
"Probably in one of the neighboring farms, with horses, to calm down and stop himself from shooting someone between the eyes."
"And the others ?"
"Polly is talking to them in the kitchen. She thinks dad wants something. Money probably. He'll leave quickly when he gets what he's looking for. But I'm afraid of what will happen in the meantime."
"I'll take care of it. I'll find Arthur." Y/N promised, because absolutely anything could happen to Arthur Senior, no one would be sad, but leaving her brother was out of the question.
Ollie asked nothing when she ordered him to send his best men to look for her older brother, and to watch what he was doing. He just nodded, calling her "Madam Solomons" with great respect.
According to Alfie, she had seduced the poor boy, as well as many of his employees, the residents of Candem, and even the dog.
"Before, Cyril sat with me by the fire. Now he moans by the door until you come home. Where have you been, love ?"
ā€œYou know very well where I was.ā€
"Damn right. With Tommy, dear Tommy. Tell me, treacle, why are my men outside a bar instead of working, uh ? Because when I asked Ollie, he just shrugged his shoulders, saying that those were the orders, but I didnā€™t give those orders. Remind me whoā€™s in charge here ?ā€
ā€œCyril.ā€
"Very funny, love. Hilarious. Why are my men following this crazy dog who serves as your brother ?"
Of course Y/N could have told him. It would have been simple, and Alfie would have sighed and muttered insults, because the whole thing was nonsense and he didn't really care because it wasn't his family.
Since it wasn't his family, she decided there was no need for him to know the details.
There was no need for him to hear about her father.
So she simply replied that Arthur was in trouble, which wasn't a lie, and that she was just checking to make sure he wasn't going to end up in prison, or worse.
If he noticed that she was hiding something, her husband accepted it, growling when he saw that she was petting the dog before giving him attention.
Several days passed, and Arthur Shelby Sr did not leave. The whole community was nervous, which made the London underground scene much more dangerous than usual.
So Y/N went by herself to look for her brother in the tenth pub he had visited this week, finding him alone at the counter while their father was talking with some men in another room.
"Little sis ! In my arms !" shouted the eldest cheerfully, hugging her tenderly.
ā€œCome home with me.ā€
"I can't. Dad needs me for a case. A big thing."
"You know very well how this is going to end. It always ends the same way."
"You sound like Tommyā€¦ He's changed this time. He wants to make amends, he has the right for a chance."
"He got more chances than Judas got silver coins, Arthur. Please."
"Y/N ? Is that you ? You grew up, I almost didn't recognize you ! Beautiful. When I think that I saw you as a mistake, I was wrong, right, son ? A charming girl, all men would want her."
In that moment, she saw in her brother's eyes that he knew he had a choice. He could defend her, saying that no one talked about his little sister like that, not even their father. He could also keep quiet, nodding his head and not talking about her marriage.
But he had drunk a lot, and despite all this time he still had resentment towards Alfie, so he opened his stupid mouth.
ā€œShe married a Jew.ā€
Their father turned to Arthur with a huge frozen smile, waiting for a follow-up to this joke, before looking at Y/N again with a darker look, understanding that he was serious.
"ā€¦ A Jew ? You married a pompous old cheapskate ?"
"Arthur, come home with me." Y/N insisted, trying to ignore everything around her brother.
"He's not just pompous, he's crazy. And a coward. And mean. He can't be trusted. I'm sure he's putting on an act to get to us, holding Y/N hostage."
"Well said, son. It's quite possible that's what happening. They know how to play, those dirty rats."
"Arthur, come home with me."
"I knew right away he was evil. Even before he killed Billy and betrayed us. I don't know why Tommy agreed to work with him again, or give him our sister's hand."
"Thomas has always been less clever than you. They're a bit sodomite, you know ? He was able to seduce several of us for sure."
"Noā€¦ No, that bastard son of a bitch, I'll kill him."
"Arthur, insult my husband once more and you will never see me again."
The threat caught her brother's attention for a second, like the tears in her eyes, but their father continued to criticize Alfie, and as always Arthur followed him blindly, considering that nothing could happen to him if he imitated his father.
A hand then rested on her shoulder, while she hesitated between crying and hitting him. Alfie's smile was quick, only for her, as he held her close, watching the two Arthurs who were surprised to see him.
Y/N thought he would say something, but he only placed a kiss on her forehead, leading her outside, to the car that took them home.
"ā€¦ I'm sorry."
"Why, treacle ? Because your father is an asshole and your brother is a moron ? I don't see how this is your fault."
ā€œIā€™m still sorry.ā€
"Nothing I haven't already heard. I promise I've never slept with Tommy."
"You are not funny." she whispered as she sobbed, letting the tension leave her body. He muttered that she was probably right as he took her in his arms, not knowing what to do to comfort her.
It was not easy to lose a family member. Y/N had been close to all of her siblings, but Arthur had always been there for her, like she had always been there for him, standing up for him, respecting his ideas, making sure he was okay.
She loved him, but she also loved her husband, and she could not tolerate him being insulted like this. If she said she wouldn't talk to him anymore, then she wouldn't talk to him anymore.
So it was a shock to find him in the middle of her living room the next day, holding his cap with two hands, looking miserable and embarrassed. Y/N almost told him to leave, before seeing Alfie standing in the corner, tapping the ground with his cane.
"Well, come on, mate. The lady is waiting."
"ā€¦ I'm sorry, lil sis."
ā€œWhere is father ?ā€
"In prison, I think. He organized bets, the coppers caught him. They would have had me ifā€¦ I mean ifā€¦"
"If I hadn't saved his sorry ass." Alfie translated, raising his eyebrows when Arthur growled at him. "Maybe I should have left him, he made you cry after all and I didn't like it."
"Y/Nā€¦ I'm sorry. Your husband is a cunt, butā€¦ But he's not that bad, I think. I see that you're happy and he treats you well. I want you happy. I'll tryā€¦ If he doesn't deserve it, I won't knock his teeth out."
"Mazel tov ! I'll buy you a drink, brother-in-law, but I don't drink and I want you to leave. Well, come one. Out."
Her husband still gave Arthur time to hug his sister, who accepted his apologies on the condition that he finally stopped following their father in his usual bullshit.
To avoid any problems, she only notice out loud after he had left that he had not winced when Alfie called him "brother-in-law".
ā€œHangover, probably.ā€
"Or he considers you part of the family now. Normally it's Polly, Tommy, John or me who keep him from completely tripping."
"If you hadn't cried, I would have let him drown in his beer and piss, treacle."
"I wonder how the cops knew, our father is often quite secretive. He moslty ruins everything by wanting more money or insulting someone."
"Oh. Someone who looks like Ollie may or may not have called the police on orders from their boss." Alfie muttered, pouting a little.
"ā€¦ Arthur will kill you if he finds out."
"He said you were a mistake. Nobody says my wife is a mistake. Would you rather he be in jail or at the bottom of the Thames ? Now I'm sleepy, love. I've been running all night to find your stupid brother, come to bed with me."
ā€œItā€™s nine in the morning.ā€
"So what ?"
The only true thing her brother had said was that Alfie was insane, but that wasn't a bad thing. His madness was charming, tender and funny, and if one day they had children, he would be the most protective and caring father in the world.
You only had to see him with Cyril to be sure, even if he slammed the door in the dog's face to be alone for a few hours, only letting him in because he couldn't concentrate anymore. cause of the squealing.
"There you go. Before, he stayed on the ground, now he jumps in my place to press against you, while it's me who opens the door for him despite the cold and my poor back."
ā€œShut up Alfie and go back to sleep.ā€
"It is noon."
"Come here."
"Very well, damn woman. You will explain to my men why I was not at work."
Since they had all heard about Y/N's family troubles, they adored her, and were quite happy that the boss wasn't there to yell at them, no one asked Y/N why Alfie had been absent. They even gave her flowers, which greatly annoyed the King of Camden.
They didn't ask if he wanted flowers too. The Shelby sent him some gifts, bottles, money and a horse, without having to say why, and Alfie was in a weird mood for the rest of the day.
Y/N only smiled, knowing that he was lost but proud to be accepted by her family.
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