#and in that case would what i feel be distinguishable from romance at all | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

citnamora · 5 months

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pls tell me more abt ur arospec ace attorney headcanons. my personal fav is lovequeer aro phoenix wright 4 loveless aro miles edgeworth.

Lovequeer Phoenix makes me SO happy!!! AND YESSSS LOVELESS ARO EDGEWORTH!!!!!! Aro4aro Narumitsu is hands down my absolute favorite flavor of the ship!! Oh my goodness!!! ARO4ARO SO TRUE!!!! Two aros absolutely demolishing amatonormativity with their level of trust and devotion to one another <33

Seeing this ask got me so excited to indulge because I'm aro so obviously I love projecting my community's, and my own, labels onto my favorite characters! But AA is something really special because there's very little canon romance which means lots of room for interpretation!!

(So a lot of my headcanons are a result of them just looking like the flags because the arospec community is full of beautifully colored flags I can't help but see everywhere)

Phoenix is recipro to me because any time he's shown romantic interest in someone it's pretty much always been when they hit on him first. Like the idea doesn't even cross his mind until then!! From what I've seen from recipro individuals this is a really common experience which is why it Makes Sense to me! I'm generally open to any and all arospec Phoenix headcanons because they just click with me (for obvious reasons, LOL)

For me, Iris is demiro because her whole story with Phoenix just screams it to me. She probably went in only hoping to get the necklace back from her sister's next victim and then she gets to know him as this kindhearted guy who would do anything for the people he loves and she falls HARD. I don't think they were "dating" the whole time which I'm pretty sure was confirmed by Iris herself but I honest to goodness believe they were lovey dovey in those last weeks or months leading up to Dahlia stepping in! I should also confess I'm a Feenris shipper, haha, so I'm biased on that front. Demiro Iris just means A Lot to me

Maya is aroace lesbian in that she thinks girls are really pretty!! And also in how she kept moving between the aroace and lesbian labels to the point she decided she'd label herself both. This one was mostly inspired by her going "omg that girl was so pretty" to just about every girl she meets which feels very, very sapphic LOL. I hc she's romance indifferent in the sense she doesn't mind dating but it's not something she actively seeks out! Though I think she'd love the meals that come with dinner dates- she's got food on the brain 24/7 after all (just like me for real)

Mia is pan angled aroace, more specifically greypansexual aro! Because she gives me romance repulsed aro vibes at first but her relationship with Diego (and possibly with Lana) would point to her being more romance ambivalent. Pansexual Mia is a headcanon I've had for a looooong time as far back as my first AA hc document while greysexual is a recent development. She's always been aro to me! Aro plant mom <3

Franziska is quiromantic to me. I mean, she's the palette of the platoniromantic flag! This headcanon only came about because of that 4koma comic where Phoenix makes Franziska flustered by telling her Maya's being strong for her because she sees Franziska as a dear friend. I just got the vibes. Also, the colors! I honestly don't think she'd see the appeal of romance with or without the feelings she can't distinguish. She enjoys her independence and I can't see her "settling down" in the slightest

Now, I've bounced around with where I think Edgeworth is on the aromantic spectrum. But I know damn well he belongs there! Lately I've considered Edgeworth being lithro gay, whether he loses feelings upon entering a relationship or doesn't want to act on them in the first place I'm honestly not sure. (Edgeworth is an interesting case for me because I flip flop between him having feelings or being omniaromantic lol) Probably never getting married regardless. Even before the lines about it I had my doubts! I like the idea of him marrying for tax benefits but outside of that.. I can't see him ever entering a traditional marriage let alone traditional romance. It feels out of character for him

There are others but these are by far the most developed ones! Recipro Phoenix and aroace lesbian Maya are my favorites because they feel the most accurate in regards to canon but pan angled aroace Mia is also up there. I'm probably going to post more arospec headcanons as I come up with them because y'all seem to really like them and I like talking about em!!

Thank you so much for asking!

#asks #gyakuten saiban #ace attorney #aa3 spoilers #naruhodo ryuichi #ayame #ayasato mayoi #ayasato chihiro #karuma mei #mitsurugi reiji #phoenix wright #maya fey #sister iris #mia fey #franziska von karma #miles edgeworth #anon I wish I knew who you were!! your headcanon is top tier!!! I really enjoy seeing aro spec headcanons!#this is pretty much it for ones I've thought out to some degree. but I will inevitably think of more the longer I play these games #this ask is pretty old btw it's been in my drafts for about a month or so I think. but I've thought about it a lot!

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tamsong · 8 months

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the homestuck quadrant system & relationships in KotLC

i am fully aware no one asked for this. WAIT that’s a lie three of you asked for this. @orionhong @the-way-astray @soryasongsaa this post is for you <3 it’s been simmering in my drafts since november and i finally had an excuse to finish, and i hope u guys find it interesting!

so. what exactly is the quadrant system, you may ask? and why is it relevant to kotlc? well, we’ll start with the webcomic homestuck. (oh boy) this comic features an alien species called trolls (based off internet trolls) that have some very fun cultural distinctions, such as a caste system based on blood color and the quadrant system, which is a fun variation of romance that i think could be very fun if we applied it to elves, which don’t have enough cultural differences in my opinion.

homestuck trolls have four type of romance as opposed to one and each has its own specific purpose. 2 of them are necessary for reproduction, and 2 of them are necessary for peace and harmony in society. it’s considered desirable to partake in all four kinds of romance, and there are certain rules around this that i’ll get to later. while KOTLC elves only use the one traditional form of romance, it’s considered desirable to be in a socially-acceptable relationship, an approved match, to help grow the elven species, and have a similar sense of Regulation around romance. telepaths also have cognatedom, a special kind of relationship that adds potential for romantic drama into the mix.

i thought it would be interesting if in an alternate universe, the elves recognized more than one form of romance to distinguish their society even more from that of humans. it’s also just fun to ship characters but with extra nuance and spice. so without further ado, let me explain the four quadrants and speculate which relationships in KOTLC, both canon and otherwise, would be in which quadrant! enjoy this silly little time with me

so!! there are two categories: red romance and black romance. red is associated with positive feelings and black with negative, although it’s a bit more nuanced than that. they’re also divided into Concupiscent (associated but not exclusively linked with sexual attraction and reproduction) and Conciliatory (not associated with reproduction). each of the quadrants is assigned one of the four suits in a deck of cards, hence red and black. here's a convenient chart:

a relationship might not just fall into one quadrant, too. relationships are only meant to use one label at a time (more on this later) but often shift across quadrants or be called one quadrant but have some traits of another.

below, i’ve written descriptions of each romance type and also given suggestions for KOTLC ships that would fall into these categories. feel free to fight with me on my choices if you like.

FLUSHED QUADRANT: MATESPRITSHIP/HEARTS <3 (red, concupiscent)

this quadrant is most similar to regular human romance, and already features in kotlc. there's not a whole lot much more to say here, so let's get into examples.

a good canonical example of this in KOTLC is edaline and grady ruewen being matesprits (the name for this kind of partner). an example of flushed feelings that were mutual but never became a relationship is kenric and oralie. sophie and fitz also had flushed feelings for each other canonically, as do sophie and keefe right now, but i would say in both cases the feelings aren't purely <3. i'll talk more about that soon, though.

other noncanon relationships i would describe as matesprits/flushed crushes are tiergan/prentice and marella/linh.

PALE QUADRANT: MOIRALLEGIANCE/DIAMONDS <> (red, concilliatory)

moirails could be best described in our terms as platonic soulmates/queerplatonic partners. that being said, while it doesn't involve kissing or sexual attraction, it IS a type of romance and is distinct from an average friendship. moirallegiance is actually WILDLY similar to the concept of Cognatedom in KOTLC, which is what inspired this behemoth of a post in the first place.

(furthermore, this is why posts implying that cognates are always romantic rub me the wrong way. there are plenty of forms of closeness that aren't traditional romance/flushed).

like cognates, moirails aren't just soul besties, but they're balancing forces that complement each other and keep each other grounded. these relationships hinge on sharing feelings, mutual acceptance, giving advice, and bringing the other person down to earth.

this makes alden and quinlin a good canonical example of ex-moirails. a non-cognate relationship in KOTLC that resembles moirallegiance is that between keefe and dex: they have similar personalities, share secrets, and are able to help each other even when their other relationships are on the rocks.

while sophie and fitz obviously had flushed feelings for each other, their cognate relationship most closely resembles a moirallegiance. they're a pretty good representation of quadrant vacillation, going from close friends and cognates to dating to back to close friends (although their friendship is still recovering from that).

also, while sophie and keefe have flushed feelings for each other, they would actually make really good moirails. they repeatedly have "feelings jams" where they share their worries and trauma with each other (not to say that matesprits can't do this, it's just specifically associated with moirallegiance) like the sleepover scene in neverseen. they're able to see who each other are under their own individual masks, and have well-complementing personalities that bring each other back down to earth. sophie is impulsive but good at connecting with others while keefe thinks things through but makes decisions without consulting other people.

PITCH QUADRANT: KISMESISSITUDE/SPADES <3< (black, concupiscent)

this is where we start to get a bit confusing. pitch relationships are based on hatred, frustration, and annoyance, but just like moirallegiance isn't just an average friendship, kismesissitude isn't your average hatred. there is also an element of attraction and in homestuck is one of the two reproduction-based quadrants.

a kismesis, one's pitch partner, must be someone that not only annoys and angers you but also indirectly challenges you to grow and recognize your own flaws. a kismesis is someone you hate, but grudgingly respect, but also find attractive. basically, it's a very strong arch-rivalry. and while a kismesis is intrinsically hate-based, they’re supposed to cause more or less equal trouble for each other and not actually wish to kill or permanently disable the other. if one or both wants this, or there is a power dynamic where one is harming the other much more, then it’s not a healthy kismesis.

obviously, these feelings aren't really recognized in human or canonical elf society, but if they were i think keefe and tam would make a good kismesis pair. they have outwardly clashing personalities and abilities, but are actually very similar people with a lot of chemistry who just present in different ways. they are at odds for most of their interactions but do show trust and care.

some even better kismesis pairs could be sophie/stina, marella/stina, or even dex/stina. tbh this is just telling me that stina is really good as kismesissitude. home girl just loves hatred i guess. maruca/biana is also a plausible one. you could even do vespera/fintan. go crazy lol

a good example of unrequited pitch feelings is dex’s hate obsession with fitz in the first couple books. in recent material, keefe/fitz could be on their way to a pitch relationship after spending most of their lives in an either pale or platonic situation, but i digress.

ASHEN QUADRANT: AUSPITICISM/CLUBS c3< (black, conciliatory)

this is definitely the weirdest one and is the least defined within the text of homestuck itself, but it means we can also have some fun with it. in homestuck, the ashen quadrant is mostly used for the purpose of mediating two opposing people so they don’t fall into the pitch quadrant. it’s a weird three-way situation involving the conflicting pair and the auspistice, who would be the one having ashen feelings. these feelings might be expressed through an attitude of “god these two are idiots but they’re My idiots damn it and i need to make sure they don’t cause problems.”

two important things to note here: 1) you are only meant to have one person in each of your four quadrants at any given time. 2) while you can shift quadrants, your relationship with someone is only meant to have one of these labels at a time. homestuck trolls are very aggressive and develop feelings of dislike quite easily, so auspistices are needed to prevent people from cheating / getting into romantic fights with people who aren’t their kismesis. while elves aren’t as aggressive, this still could be a problem. for example, if tam and keefe were an established kismesis pair, but keefe and fitz started fighting in a way that could turn into hatred, sophie might be called to be an auspistice for them and make sure their fighting doesn’t turn pitch (in which case keefe would be cheating).

assuming keefe and sophie are matesprits, this also poses a problem for their relationship since sophie is acting as keefe’s auspistice and not his matesprit. It’s a lot.

auspisticism can also be a generalized way of describing relationship mediation. sophie, fitz, and keefe probably need some auspisticizing for all the quadrant shifting they’re doing.

this kind of feeling may be hard to recognize as romantic because of all the utilitarianism surrounding it. think of it as being a very dedicated therapist friend, or part of a very stressful polycule. it requires a Hell of a lot of devotion for two people for their friend to get involved in all that conflict, a devotion which can very much be romantic. I imagine sophie having a high capacity/desire to be an auspistice, as would biana.

that’s the main chunk of the explanation, and there’s a lot to play with here. beyond what i described, you can also get things like two people rapid-firing between flushed and pitch and back to flushed, to people who have feelings for each other but not the same kind, to messy groups of 3, 4, or even more people where relationship types are constantly shifting. conflict in one quadrant can also impact your relationships with all other partners. for example, when alden and quinlin’s cognatedom/moirallegiance fell apart, it could have put stress on quinlin’s matespritship with livvy to the point where the flushed feelings between them are either gone or turned into unhealthy kismesissitude depending on how you look at it.

still confused? that’s okay, you’re kind of meant to be. andrew hussie is a fucking mad lad who doesn’t even take their own story seriously. that being said he did give us the bare ideas for some cool and complex relationship dynamics and a new way of seeing romance, so i’ll give them that.

but anyways, have fun with this!! i would LOVE to see your homestuck-based HCs if you happen to come up with any. a couple more kotlc/homestuck related notes before you go:

- sophie foster is a valid troll name (6 letter first and last name) as is gisela sencen. i couldn’t find any others, which is weird considering the amount of characters.

- trolls have varying powers depending on their blood color, not unlike special abilities.

that’s all folks! have a spectacular day and i hope you learned something cool!

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recentadultburnout · 9 months

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Info for writer in Thai series fandom: some music genres and foreign media in Thai

*Due to Tumblr's limit, this repost has fewer examples than on AO3*

Notes:

This chapter is partially because we have so many main characters who love music—an entire group of music lovers in some cases—so I feel like it would be a good topic, and partially because I wanted to introduce you to some of the songs I like. Did you know that at one point GMM was kind of a monopoly in the Thai (pop?) music industry? Not that they are small now by any means. They own so many copyrights, and they kept remixing and using them in the series. I do enjoy those songs, so I'm not complaining lol.

Let's start with some genres that are probably not known internationally.

เพลงลูกทุ่ง -phleng luk thung-country music

Phleng = music, song, melody, composition

Luk = child

Thung = field

Originated in 2480 B.E./1937 A.D.

Luk Thung is a modernized version of Thai country music. It has quite a distinguishing feature, both in the way people sing it and the instrument itself. It has a sibling called Luk Krung, which, unlike Luk Thung, is not a popular genre any more. Luk thung is a popular genre. There is a time when BlackPink is trending worldwide and at number one on many charts but still loses to a Luk Thung singer, Monkaen Kaenkoon, in terms of view count in Thailand. So, yeah, Luk Thung is popular. It’s not considered trendy, tho. Probably because we have a pretty classist society and Luk Thung's target group isn't, like, the elite or the wealthiest.

What the song's lyrics usually are about -Life, specifically the life of the poor. And love—I'm pretty sure love is the most popular topic in everything, whether it's tragic, funny, or touching.

Dancers - The dancers, specifically their outfits, are one of the highlights of the Lukthung show. It needs to be showy and eye-catching. Glitter and feathers are frequently featured. Even if you don't recognize the music as Lukthung, you would probably recognize an army of dancers clad in a very striking outfit as a part of a Lukthung show.

Example

From series

This one is a cover of Got Jakrapun’s, aka King of Luk Thung's, song.

youtube

เพลงลูกกรุง - phleng luk krung

Phleng = music, song, melody, composition

Luk = child

Krung = city, capital, metropolis

Originated in 2474 B.E./1931 A.D.

As previously mention, Luk krung and Luk thung are kind of sibling terms. But unlike Luk Thung, Luk Krung is not a popular genre any more. Every once in a while, someone will pick an old song to cover, but there isn't much of a new one, if at all.

Well, actually, since the definition of this genre is so vague, a lot of songs would technically count, but when the word Luk Krung is mentioned, people do have a certain expectation in mind, and it's pretty much "when grandma is still young". I doubt this term would ever be used to describe any new song that does not actively go for a retro vibe.

The Suntaraporn Band - Suntaraporn Band is a very old band and has produced many Lukkrung songs. They were the first ones to start producing what is considered Lukkrung music, actually. It was born in 1939 and is still active to this day.

Example

From series "I Will Knock You" - The song in the background is an original version, and this series also uses a rearranged version as an OST.

youtube

This playlist is not from a series but from the novel "I Will Knock You". They are songs that were mentioned in the novel.

youtube

Some singers

Gun Napat

-He also sings many other genres. To be honest, he actually didn’t sing Lukkrung song that much. But he’s great at doing it. You may recognize him as the one who sings A Tale of Thousand Stars OST.

Charin Nuntanakorn

-He has done a lot of things and has a lot of songs, including the one he begged a song writer to write so he could sing it to his now-wife. That song and its background story sounded like peak romance when my mom told them to middle school me.

The song -> https://www.youtube.com/embed/U7XubPfCXtY

เพลงเพื่อชีวิต - phleng phuea chiwit

phleng = music, song, melody, composition

phuea = for

Chiwit = life

Songs in this genre are about the lives of people, especially those of the lower class, and talk about the difficulties of being taken advantage of, as do songs calling for democracy and political satire. Songs are considered to be in this genre based on their lyrics content, not their music style. Many songs in this genre are also Lukthung genre.

Example

Commoner Band

- This band is formed purely to express political opinion, which is mainly disapproval for coups and people who gain from them.

TaitosmitH

-I see some people ask about songs that were played in LOL2023. One of them is Taitosmith's song. It's the one that's played by Ohm, Nanon, Sea, Gemini, Pond, Phuwin, Khaotung, and Joong. It's called ยุติ-ธรรม.

youtube

Caravan Band

- one of the first phuea chiwit band

youtube

This one isn't the band’s original song, but it's quite a symbol. Its lyrics are from Chit Phumisak’s, an activist’s, poem.

Singers who are also actors and have acted in a BL series

Kob Songsit

-Theerapanyakul dad from KinnPorsche

-Botkawee's dad from Be My Favorite

-Older Songpol from 55:15 Never Too Late

-He's done some musicals too, and they're great.

-The song Phupha plays in A Tale of Thousand Stars is his song from a musical he stars in, Thawi Phop(ทวิภพ) The Musical.

Here a full song with English sub

youtube

Nok Sinjai

-Older Jaya Janiya from 55:15 Never Too Late

- She has been in many dramas and musicals. She and Kob Songsit have done some musicals together before.

Nat Sakdatorn

-Kit(Chopper’s dad) from Never Let Me Go

-Sam from Friend Zone 2: Dangerous Area (2020)

-He is not really known as a professional singer, but he stars in the same musical with Kob Songsit and Nok Sinjai, and I love that musical’s songs.

So, here is the musical I mentioned.

youtube

It's called บัลลังก์เมฆ (banlang mek- cloud throne) the musical. This version is kind of the cut version, so the story line is quite rushed, but the songs are all there.

Nok Sinjai as Panrung, the protagonist Kob Songsit as Kuea, Panrung’s second husband Nat Sakdatorn as Pakon, Panrung’s youngest son

The story is about Panrung, who should have a smooth sailing life, but due to her horrible decision-making and being an asshole and dictator-mom, she ruins her own life and also makes her children's lives a disaster.

The characters consist of Panrung, her two ex-husbands, her current husband, her four children, her ex-friend, who is also her current husband's ex-wife, and their son.

The songs are good. The theme song is iconic. The plot is....

Jeep Wasu

-Older Seksan from 55:15 Never Too Late

-His other nickname is Jeep Ror Dor(จิ๊บ ร.ด.) from his famous song with the same name. Ror Dor-ร.ด.-รักษาดินแดน-Territorial Defense If Thai men do not want to be conscripted, they can choose to apply to be trained while they are still students. Those trainees are called ร.ด.

Lookwa Pijika

-Gun's mom from My School President

Mos Patiparn

-Kiao's friend from Past-Senger

-He also plays a musical

Intira Jaroenpura

-Our favorite BL mom

-She is more actor than singer, but she does sing a bit

-Thun's mother from He's Coming to Me

-Vanika, Thana's Wife, from 3 Will Be Free

-Her movie, Nang Nak(นางนาก 1999), made me relocate a Buddha image to under my pillow to maximize protection.

-Her half sister, Mai, is a big-name singer.

Some more Thai singers and bands

Bird Thongchai

If you watch anything from GMM regularly, then you've heard his song before.

For example, The Gifted 2 uses his song as background music, and the Never Let Me Go pilot trailer uses one of his songs and Our Skyy series name and the theme song are from the song, which was originally his too. Many of the songs that randomly came up in variety shows are his, both the songs the staff edited in and the songs people sing or make jokes with.

He started his career as a singer in 1983 and is still active to this day. He has been a household name since I can remember. His voice is very unique, and he is always open to new things.

youtube

Palmy

-Palmy's songs are never boring, and Palmy herself is also an interesting person.

-Friend Zone movie OST is originally her song.

youtube

-This song plays with the concept of losing Khwan and even has an explanation about a ceremony to call it back at the end of the MV. There is no English subtitle for that, tho.

Tattoo Colour

-This band’s name is a pun! Tattoo in Thai is Sak(สัก) and colour is Si(สี). Together, สักสี sound like ศักดิ์ศรี which means prestige, honor, fame, or honour.

Foreign media in Thai

Music

Thais have a large K-Pop fan base. My best friend has been a fan for more than a decade now, and the fan base seems to have only grown bigger since. J-Pop and C-Pop are not as popular, but I have personally known a few fans, and there is one in my timeline every once in a while, so I assume their popularity is steady.

And there are, of course, those big names: Taylor Swift, Harry Styles, Rihanna, Ed Sheeran, etc.

Animation

There is Japanese anime, of course. Japan is pretty popular in Thailand in general, whether in culture, products, or media. Anime, manga, novels, or even nonfiction books are getting translated all the time and are very easy to find.

China’s animation has started to gain popularity these past few years.

And there are American animation like Cartoon Network and Disney.

Books

Chinese books are always around, I think? In my understanding, (modern?) Wuxia genre market has its peek in Thai around 2500 B.E. or 1957 A.D., not that I would say it not popular anymore, but like, around that time there are some big translator that to this day people will still adopt their translation of idiom from them, so like, they are BIG. In present, Chinese books often has its own section in book store. If you are a Danmei fan like me you might notice before that there are a lot of official translation in Thai, it is a bless really. I would be reading a random unofficial translation on the internet, the translation not even half way, I was dying to know how it gonna be next, and before I know there is an official, complete translation I can get.

Japanese book also often has its own section in book store too. I would say that in a main stream book store the amount of Japanese book are less than Chinese but there are niche book store that sell Japanese books exclusively, and that is something. Those type of store will mostly cater to anime fans, so the book I talk about are usually something that has an anime adaptation or was adapt from anime, it will also have other merch.

Korean books are getting translate to Thai quite often but less than Chinese and Japanese for sure.

Books in English also get translate often too and books in English as it is are usually the biggest section in the books in foreign language(non-translation) category.

Usually if it is a classic or famous enough it likely to be translate at some point, no matter what language its original from.

Tv show- series/verities

US, UK, Korea, Japan, China, and India drama are what I know for the fact that there are a certain amount of avid fans out there. For verities, for Korea and China, I saw fans make a fan sub for their favorite group, but for Japan, there is an official sub and dub for quite a few programs, last I checked. Does that mean Japan verities are more or less popular in Thai?

In conclusion, it's usually the US, UK, Korea, Japan, and China.

Index

#Youtube #thai culture

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viscountessevie · 7 months

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Hunt On Dark Waters [ARC Review]

Release Date: 7th November 2023

Overall Rating: ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐

Spice Level: 🌶️🌶️🌶️

My Review:

Hunt on Dark Waters by Katee Robert is a contemporary romance set in a fantasy world of various realms. Our witchy heroine, Evelyn has a bad habit of swiping valuables with her sticky fingers. After stealing from her ex Lizzie, a powerful vampire, she escapes through a portal. Evie finds herself floundering in the magical sea between realms called Threshold. She is then rescued onto the Crimson Hag, home to our telekentic hero.

With no tangible childhood he could remember, Captain Bowen's unflinching loyalty to his ship under the Cŵn Annwn has been his life's duty. The Cŵn Annwn is a network of ships like the Crimson Hag operate under. He has always enforced their rules and vows with no questions asked. Evelyn is no exception to the rule and he gives her the ultimatum to join their ranks or die.

As Evelyn tries to evade honouring her vow, their two personalities clash. Tensions turn into something more. Through their journey together, secrets begin to surface and they both start questioning everything they have stood for.

~~~

This was one of my most anticipated books of the year and really took my time with this as I did not want it to end. I adored the book and am really loving Katee in this point of her writing career -consisting of epic sagas with political themes and great messaging. Just like I have been enjoying the ride through Dark Olympus, she is now taking us to the sea across the magical Threshold.

The world building was done extremely well. It was an immersive experience. From the physical space of Evelyn's world to the Threshold sea and the various islands surrounding it. Then we were introduced how the Crimson Hag is run and what exactly the Cŵn Annwn are.

On to the characters, I loved how fleshed out Evelyn and Bowen are as individuals before they get together. They are both very different people and feel so distinct in their point of views. I usually find that multiple point of views can get muddled with an author's narrative voice if there isn't a unique tone for the different characters.

However, Katee did excellent in distinguishing between Evelyn and Bowen's chapters. The differences were stark and it was a good contrast between the two. Evie initially starts out as a witty, sarcastic fun loving witch with a sentimental streak and some familial grief for baggage. While Bowen is a straight-laced Eldest Child coded man who is always following the rules of the Cŵn Annwn and would never think twice about going against them. He is very much of the mindset not to bite the hand that fed him. Or in his case, the people who saved and took him in as their own.

These two really go through a brilliant development over the course of the book. Flighty Evie finally finds herself a cause and someone to anchor herself to. On the other hand, Bowen starts to question the cracks within the corrupt system that is the Cŵn Annwn.

The main allegory within the book I really enjoyed was The Cŵn Annwn. They were meant to parallel the militarised police in our world. Katee does a great job of showing something isn't quite right with their organisation from the very start. Then slowly peels back the layers of Cŵn Annwn with each act to reveal their true colours. It is mostly through Bowen's point of view, whose gratitude comes from being taken in years ago. When Evie starts to question their modus operandi, we realise it's terrible system. It hits harder when Bowen has to confront the fact that he and his crew weren't really 'one of the good ones' and were just upholding a corrupt system.

In line with this, the plot was detailed, very thought out and well-paced. While there are loose ends regarding Bowen's past and a big event that happened to close off Act 2, I'm confident it will all be tied up in due time. The Act 2 Event is going to come back full circle in the next book as hinted in it's summary. As for the overarching plot of the series, it's been well set up. The direction the bigger story is taking is very clear. I am very excited for my favourite non-binary characters, Kit and Nox to hopefully show up! The way those two were being written, I'm hoping for either recurring roles or respective books for them.

As for the romance, it was solid. I liked their chemistry and banter in their scenes together. However, I felt that the development from lust to love could have been drawn out. Maybe by a chapter or two. They needed a bit more time to bridge the gap between being rivals who had an attraction to falling in love. It just felt like sex was substituted in when we could have gotten one or two more scenes to give their connection more depth. This was slightly remedied during their love declarations which pinpointed the moments they started to fall for the other.

Overall, I loved this book! Katee definitely delivered on all fronts. She has done it once again with her intricate way she built this universe - with Threshold and its interesting characters. This was a great first book with a sweet romance while wondefully setting up the upcoming series. I'm certain we will be seeing some recurring characters as they all come together to work towards their common goal. I definitely would recommend this for anyone looking for a pirate fantasy romance, vibrant settings and for those wanting to invest in an epic saga!

Thank you to Random House UK, Cornerstone, Del Rey for an advanced copy of this book in exchange for my honest review.

#NetGalley #ARC Review #Hunt On Dark Waters #Katee Robert #Romance #Fantasy #Hunt on Dark Waters by Katee Robert #Romance Novel Blogging

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thedeal-if · 1 year

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What are the tropes for the romance? (Friends to lovers and etc….)

Hey!

As I was planning the story I barely distinguished between tropes and routes so I'll just mention both. I hope it's not too confusing (TD has a shit ton of content but it'll all be much clearer once the demo is out in a couple months).

All 8 RO's have:

a shy romance and a flirty romance route (in which MC actively acknowledge that they have feelings/are attracted to a RO).

A friendmance (in which MC doesn't acknowledge that they have feelings, they realise later on about their crush/friends to lovers).

A rivalmance (in which they don't like a RO but they like that RO/attraction despite disliking a RO's personality).

A special route which only unlocks if you meet certain criteria. An example would be Lilith's route if you play a character who is a virgin.

A rival route in which MC and a character just hate each other period.

And a friendship route which is platonic.

Tropes-wise I'd say that so far I've covered/will cover:

Best friends to lovers/Childhood friends to lovers (Josh)

Friends to lovers (Villanelle, as you can be friends with her prior to the events of the first game)

Enemies to lovers (this is specially the case with Aliyah. No matter what you do, she will actively hate your guts from the get go).

Love triangle (very angsty, Victor and Josh).

Poly (Nathan/Dante, Lilith/Dante, Lilith/Aliyah).

Opposites attract (possible with every RO based on MC's personality, and it will be acknowledged in-game)

Friends with benefits (possible with Nathan but it can be skipped)

Victor also covers another trope which is kinda spoilery to share

Immortal X Mortal (Aliyah, Dante, Lilith, Nathan)

I've checked a list of tropes and added all of those which I recognised ^^ but I might miss a few. As I said, TD has a lot of content.

#ask #the deal #if game #interactive fiction #aliyah #mc #dot #lilith #dante #Josh #victor #nathan #inferno #the deal if #ros #gameplay

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revlyncox · 2 months

Text

Love, Liberation, and New Visions: Wisdom from bell hooks

Love is more of a practice than a sentiment. This sermon was offered to The Unitarian Society in East Brunswick on February 11, 2024.

Love is an important practice for Unitarian Universalists. Indeed, love is at the center of the way UU values are described in the proposed revision to Article II of the UUA bylaws. As Valentine’s Day approaches, and we are bombarded with images of romantic love that may or may not be healthy, this is a good time to re-orient ourselves to our deepest values; we remind ourselves about what love means in concrete terms.

A few years ago, the world lost one of its great sages who wrote about love. The author, feminist, poet, professor, and social activist known to her readers as bell hooks died in December of 2021 at the age of 69. She used her great-grandmother’s name as a pen name. She would write it in all lower case, and said that was so readers would focus on (quote) the “substance of books, not who I am.”

As an author and an academic, bell hooks was successful and influential. She taught at various universities such as Stanford, Yale, and City College of New York before returning home to Kentucky to join the faculty of Berea College in 2004, where she was a Distinguished Professor in Residence in Appalachian Studies.

With over 30 published books on topics ranging from racism to pedagogy to a culture of place, there is a lot we can learn from bell hooks, yet in honor of the upcoming holiday and our exploration of love in the proposed Article II, concentrating on her book All About Love: New Visions seems the logical place to begin. Written in 1999 and published in 2000, this was her first in a series about love that also included “Communion,” “The Will to Change,” and “Salvation.” While the book All About Love does address romantic love, hooks makes the specific point that romance isn’t the only or the most important kind of love, and that all love is better understood as a practice rather than a sentiment.

In practicing a love ethic, hooks said that love is best understood as a verb. Inspired by M. Scott Peck and The Road Less Traveled, hooks advocated for clear, operational definitions of love. She wrote, “To truly love, we must learn to mix various ingredients–care, affection, recognition, respect, commitment, and trust, as well as honest and open communication” (From “Chapter One: Clarity: Give Love Words”). We might be surprised that, as a poet, hooks was less caught up in creating metaphors and images that described the inner experience of feeling affection than she was fierce in insisting that we can all learn how to love well. Yet, as a poet, she knew that words need to have meaning in the living world.

Dr. Takiyah Nur Amin made the point in this week’s Braver/Wiser devotional newsletter that Unitarian Universalism is a lived faith. Our actions matter. She also talked about the theological importance of Black Unitarian Universalist history, because much of what our Black UU ancestors have to teach is written in their lives rather than in essays. She writes:

If you’re seeking sacred Black “text” in our tradition, you have to examine the way our Black ancestors lived. You have to seek out the Black folks who were in Unitarian and Universalist or UU congregations, and the work that they were doing in community—whether it was suffrage, or trying to educate Black children, or their working towards social action or civil access. Our “text” is embodied in the lives of people like Frances Ellen Watkins Harper, Joseph Jordan, David Eaton, and countless others.

(Dr. Amin continues)

One of the things I love about this tradition is that our faith is covenantal and not confessional—meaning that to some degree, our tradition cares little about what you stand up and say you believe. The evidence of your Unitarian Universalism is embodied in the depth of your relationships: how do you live in relationship to self and other? (I don't just mean human other: to the plants, to the animals, to the stars…) The proof is in the pudding, for UUs. It’s not about what you have to say. How are you living?

I encourage you to read Dr. Amin’s whole reflection. How we live means how we show up for our values in the public square, and how we treat the people around us, and how we steward the resources with which we have been entrusted, and how we commit to growing as people. It’s all love.

Here at TUS, one of the ways we practice love is by adhering to the right relations covenant. This document is on display in the hall, and I’ll read it to you:

Right Relations Covenant

As members and friends of this Unitarian Universalist congregation, we affirm that our community is founded on openness, trust, respect, and love. In our time together–in meetings and conversations and worship and work–we covenant with one another to freely explore our values and honor our diversity as a source of communal strength. Therefore, I will:

accept responsibility for my individual acts and interactions;

in all encounters, speak for myself, from my own experience;

allow others to speak for themselves;

listen with respect and resilience;

not criticize the views of others or attempt to pressure or coerce others;

not interrupt–except to indicate that I cannot hear;

participate within the time frames suggested by the facilitator;

communicate with kindness and clarity in service of justice and peace in our community

Love is one of the values named right in the first sentence of the Right Relations Covenant. Love is operationalized, it’s about the ways we behave, and the ways we demonstrate respect. One of the things I notice about this covenant is that it requires us to slow down. We allow others to speak for themselves; that takes time. We listen with respect and resilience; that takes time. Deep and healthy relationships require an investment of the gift of time.

Love, in a community setting, asks us to communicate about our perspectives, needs and wants; and also asks us to recognize the perspectives, needs, and wants of others. With kindness and consideration, we understand that our own perspective does not equal a demand that all operations be geared toward making us comfortable at the expense of others’ ability to participate. Love calls us to show up in service to others, to express appreciation, to look carefully for the pieces that are missing that would help us create a place where all can, as bell hooks says, “live fully and well.”

Love makes room for repair. One of the things that sets a covenant apart from a list of rules is that it stretches to accommodate our human-ness. People make mistakes. A covenant should be constructed to take this into account, and to invite people back into relationship as we acknowledge our mistakes and work toward making amends. In this morning’s story, bell hooks (in the voice of Girlpie) reminds us that “there is no all the time right. But all the time any hurt can be healed. All wrongs forgiven. And all the world made peace again.”

We come together in community from a variety of backgrounds, bringing all kinds of experiences and heavy emotions from other parts of our lives; of course we will sometimes make mistakes and have conflicts. Our brushes with misunderstanding, when we navigate them skillfully, can be the sandpaper that softens our sharp corners and helps us to smooth out the pathways for forward movement.

This is sharply different from how many of us were raised. There are plenty of settings without room for forgiveness or repair. We might say that these are places without grace, though I know that can be a tricky word. There are families where perfection, or at least a convincing illusion of perfection, is expected at all times, and failure to produce that perfection results in isolation and rejection. There are cultural expectations on some of us to be right, and where being right is more important than being collaborative.

Switching gears to a practice of love in which we can discuss our differences honestly is a profound paradigm shift for many people. It is disconcerting to be asked to acknowledge conflict or hurts if our experience is that these conversations lead only to punishment and rejection rather than to a deeper relationship that comes from mutual understanding. If our previous experience is that discomfort is a one-way ticket to exclusion, the discomfort necessary in hearing other perspectives, in admitting that we don’t know everything, in accepting responsibility–all of that discomfort is hard to tolerate if we have been taught that discomfort and danger are the same thing. The active, flexible, living practice of love is necessary to create the spaces where we can be bold, authentic, and caring.

This brings me to another point raised in All About Love, which is that the authentic practice of love is congruent with liberation. The true practice of love cannot coexist with abuse or with systems of domination. In the contrast I made just now between the loving community and the settings where no mistakes are tolerated, one of the ingredients that gets in the way of love is fear. As hooks writes in Chapter Six:

“Fear is the primary force upholding structures of domination. It promotes the desire for separation, the desire not to be known. When we are taught that safety lies always with sameness, then difference, of any kind, will appear as a threat. When we choose to love we choose to move against fear–against alienation and separation. The choice to love is a choice to connect–to find ourselves in the other.”

As an antidote to fear, hooks calls us to choose to be known, to choose to be our whole selves and to embrace the practice of other people being their whole selves, different from us. This is what we need to cultivate hope and to overcome the nihilism of isolation, despair, and fear. She quotes Cornel West, who says:

“Nihilism is not overcome by arguments or analyses, it is tamed by love and care. Any disease of the soul must be conquered by a turning of one’s soul. This turning is done through one’s own affirmation of one’s worth–an affirmation fueled by the concern of others.” (Quoted in All About Love, Chapter Six)

Cornel West is also known for reminding us that “justice is what love looks like in public.” For both West and hooks, love is a practice in our personal relationships and in our societal structures. Listen to West here, talking about “affirmation of one’s worth.” This is Humanist language, ready to unleash the potential of the inherent worth and dignity of every person, which necessarily includes dismantling the structures that dehumanize. West and hooks agree that making that turn is fueled by active care and concern, by practices of nurture and affirmation and support. The project of caring for one another and the project of humanizing the spaces we inhabit and the project of cultivating justice and mercy in the public sphere are all the same project. They are all aspects of love.

I want to back up a little bit and talk about liberation, because it’s not a framework that everyone is used to. Liberation is not single-issue based, and it is not about more powerful people making good things happen on behalf of less powerful people. Liberation is a vision for a different way of being. Putting this in love terms, bell hooks says, “A love ethic presupposes that everyone has the right to be free, to live fully and well.”

Liberation requires an assumption of agency, particularly the agency of people who are most impacted by oppression. Black liberation theologians like James Cone and Latin American liberation theologians like Gustavo Gutiérrez are also illuminating here. In liberation theology movements, our deepest sources of hope and inspiration are not separate from the world, but are present with us in the struggle for liberation. Liberation means freedom from oppression, living into a world that practices the inherent worth and dignity of every person, moving toward economic justice and collective concern for collective well-being.

Liberation is a vision in which all of us need all of us. Our thriving is connected. Liberation is not about benefactors or saviors, but about people acting together for the collective good, because none of us are truly self-sufficient. Put another way, liberation is about right relationship, at every scale of relationship. And so, full circle, liberation is about love. When we behave in our relationships in a way that brings about mutual care and shared thriving, that is the love in operational terms that bell hooks spoke of.

Liberation is a vision, it is a practice we can create on a small scale, even as we acknowledge that the larger society is not yet free. According to bell hooks, systemic oppression, accepted in the larger culture, is a major obstacle to our practice of true love. In All About Love, she explores the obstacles of patriarchy; gender roles and expectations that prevent people from being honest with others and themselves; norms of systemic oppression that turn what could be mutually caring relationships into power struggles. In other writing, she explores how racism gets in the way of relationships and in the way of the feminist movement. Systems of oppression overlap and interlock. Every aspect of a worldview that diminishes the agency, dignity, and worth of some for the benefit of others gets in the way of the practice of love. And practicing love in defiance of those systems–being authentic and demonstrating care and cultivating courage in relationships–the practice of love helps dismantle oppression.

We cannot practice a love ethic without letting go of racism, patriarchy, classism, wealth inequality, xenophobia, and other oppressions. “Awakening to love can happen only as we let go of our obsession with power and domination,” writes bell hooks. She goes on to say, “To bring a love ethic to every dimension of our lives, our society would need to embrace change.”

Embracing change is, of course, difficult. The pandemic has invited us into a period of profound change, and it’s hard. Our society has the opportunity to improve building requirements for clean air, to normalize masking, to increase access to paid sick leave and to quality health care. We know that no one person’s health is an isolated phenomenon; what happens to one of us affects all of us. Pretending that everything is back to normal is more tempting than making the societal changes we need to take care of each other.

Out of love, we advocate as best we can in the public square, and we remain true to our capacity to change in the service of love in our own environments. As we as a congregation live into being a hybrid community–a place where people can remain connected even if their disabilities or their caregiving responsibilities make it hard to travel on Sundays–we are going to remember again that change is hard. Practicing welcome and inclusion is hard. Demonstrating our values in the way we do things, even if it’s not familiar or comfortable, is hard. Again, if you are used to comfort being the same as safety, it may not feel like love to do the things that are unfamiliar so that we can be inclusive and flexible. Love asks us to change so that all of us can live fully and well.

Fear gets in the way of love, and practicing love gives us the courage to overcome fear. Choosing love means choosing authenticity, choosing the possibility of accountability and forgiveness, choosing collective wellbeing instead of power and domination, choosing mutual thriving instead of an ethic of control. Choosing love means choosing connection. It is not easy, and we are capable of doing hard things. Choosing love means we will not be doing hard things alone.

May it be so.

#unitarian universalism

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topoillogical · 10 months

Text

I've been mentally trying to somewhat classify the loves and love-like types of feelings I experience.

One split that's "easy" to make is romantic/platonic; I say easy since it has clear language and is a strongly demarcated split in our culture, but the quotes are there for the fact that once you really get down to it.... it's hard to define the difference explicitly.

My naive answer would be that romantic = platonic + sexual, but this is clearly not the case: many asexual alloromantics testify that their romantic feelings are different from their platonic ones, yet they don't experience sexual attraction. I believe this.

In my own experience, there are numerous people I've felt platonic and sexual towards, but not romantic towards. I'm also somewhat capable of experiencing asexual romanticism, but not completely -- I cannot remember experiencing anything consistently like this since at the latest middle school, and my asexual romantic feelings today tend to be fleeting (I.e. I'm with my partner and not thinking of sex stuff, so I'm feeling just romance. However this is generally easy to shift into hornytimes with changes in activity or atmosphere, or, like, some good kissing)

Additionally, platonic feelings clearly have a bunch of different manifestations. Familial love feels different from friend love to me, though I wonder if this is simply some factor of *disgust* within familial love? What I mean by this is, with my friends, my affection looks much more fluid between things like romance. With my family members things are highly important and somewhat committed, but very demarcated from romantic.

Anyway, then you have queerplatonic love: this is something I am definitely capable of experiencing to some extent, but find difficult to describe. I read a comic once where romance was distinguished from friendship by the number of "faces" your partner gets to see: if you have like numerous facets of yourself and your life, you dont generally share all of this with your friends, they just know some of your faces. But your partner is obligated to know and love all your faces.

I don't necessarily uncritically agree with this, but I think its representing something important: global integration. A long-term romantic relationship generally has your partner integrate into all aspects of your life (your "faces", but also things like caring for your kids and family, often living together, sharing finances, confiding everything to each other). Friendships tend to feature what I'd call local integration: someone may be your roommate (very integrated into your domestic life) but not someone you confide in or who has met your parents (not integrated into most of your inner life, not into your family). I think the scale of local to global integration is HIGHLY variable and definitely not binary/dichotomous, but that romantic and queerplatonic friendships tend towards global integration while regular friendships tend towards local integration. In my opinion, though, family relationships in western culture actually tend more towards local integration: it's not expected or generally desired for your adult family to live together, and many things might not be shared... but you are still loving each other, and committed to your familial bond.

Under this interpretation, we have:

Platonic bond + local integration + low commitment = REGULAR FRIENDSHIP

Platonic bond + local integration + high commitment = COMMITED FRIENDSHIP, and FAMILIAL BONDS generally slot in here in the culture I grew up in

Platonic bond + global integration + low commitment = SOMETHING KIND OF RARE. I think that global integration tends to imply commitment, in my culture. However this is definitely possible; an example might be a temporary but deep natural connection, like travellers who share communal living spaces with different people at different times, and make deep but temporary connections within these spaces

Platonic bond + global integration + high commitment = YAAAYYY QUEERPLATONIC. I think many familial relationships fall here too, though, which makes the distinction between them and queerplatonicism even more difficult to disentangle -- for example, many sets of twins are SQUARELY in this category, as they share many aspects of their life with each other (global integration). In non-western cultures where the children are expected to stay with their parents and such into adulthood, this kind of relationship is also probably more common... I think people tend to often label this as "emotional incest" in some cases as well, when parents are too globally involved in their adult children's lives (the classic example being mothers doting and fixating on their sons). The fact that people want to classify such a bond as some type of incest is actually very encouraging news for my classification system: I've hit on something we feel viscerally about; global integration.

Anyway, we could also do this for....

Romantic bond + local integration + low commitment = A FLING

Romantic bond + local integration + high commitment = NONTRADITIONAL RELATIONSHIP, something often seen in the poly community, and which I think often maps onto relationships that the aforementioned community describes as "not taking the relationship escalator". The relationship escalator basically describes the increased levels of commitment and integration one sees as a romantic relationship progresses, and many poly people reject this escalator and choose not to integrate certain life aspects with their partner(s), choosing not to live together being a classic example

Romantic bond + global integration + low commitment = AGAIN THIS ONE IS RARE as global integration oft implies commitment, but as in the platonic nomad example, some free love hippie-type groups are often all about this type of love. Personally I find it pretty cool myself. The transience but deepness

Romantic bond + global integration + high commitment = TRU WUV. Basically this is the top of the relationship escalator, this is you and your spouse.

Okay, so, this has not solved the original question of how to differentiate romantic and platonic, but I'd argue it has greatly progressed towards an understanding of it through the power of the process of elimination: whatever "je ne sais quoi" differentiates romance from platonic love, it isnt global integration or commitment.

Honestly, I think leaving it as that certain "je ne sais quoi" is fine, though. Romantic love is a very basic feeling, it might be prime-number like in that we can't describe it as a combination of other more fundamental types of love and emotion. This might not be the case -- you're more than welcome to propose a competing theory that *does* break down what romance is, and I'll excitedly consider it -- but it does feel like the case to me, after some thought. Sexual attraction is also probably a "prime" feeling. It's of course notable that romance tends to imply sexual attraction, and to a lesser extent sexual attraction is highly associated with and can imply romance, but this is like how global integration tends to imply commitment, but isn't the same thing at all.

This gives eight types of love with considering platonic and romantic plus the various integration and commitment types, as listed above, and if I added sexual it would be independent of platonic/romantic and lead to their being 16 types of love.

Fortunately, I don't actually think sexual attraction is super entangled with the type of love being experienced, so for specifically *love* classification it can mostly be ignored. However if you want to be less psychological and more sociological its absolutely an important distinction: the relationship types "friends" and "friends with benefits" may feel similar internally in terms of your friendly love, but have vastly different social aspects.

It may be clearer what I mean by this when I say that sexual relations are almost completely irrelevant when discussing romantic relationships: sociologically, a married couple who has sex and are in love, and a married couple who doesnt have sex but are in love, fill pretty much identical relationship slots. This is because our society thinks friendship + sex is a whole unique thing but that relationship + sex is not only normal but automatically expected (and, admittedly, because the overlap of romantic interactions and sexual interactions is much larger.)

Anyway, this lil essay doesn't actually have a conclusion. It's more of a collection of thoughts. Weigh in if you want.

#my thoughts

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splendidissimus · 6 months

Text

2005ish - Excising Voldemort

((Content warning: Draco is trying to remove the Dark Mark from his arm. With a knife. For five pages.))

((Promptspiration: @whumptober 2023: day 22: Alternate prompt: Body modification ))

Genre: whump

Romance level: none

Angst level: 3/5

Draco's headspace: fixated / seemingly fine

((words: 2800))

------------------------------------

Knives reminded Draco of Death Eaters. He had never, as far as he knew, met a wizard who carried one who didn't have the Dark Mark. Bellatrix, Rodolphus, Rowle… real sadists who wanted to be able to hurt people without a wand. It seemed fitting, then.

"Master Draco." Tolly slid the knife onto the desk and looked up at him with her ears drooped almost completely flat against her back. "Please, please choose something else…"

"It's all right, Tolly," he assured the house elf firmly. "I'll be okay. I forbid you from telling anyone what I'm doing." She wrung her hands together anxiously. "Unless I pass out," he added thoughtfully. "Or die. Then I would like to be found."

She pulled on her ears with a squeal so alarmed it didn't even make words.

"Merlin, you're going to make me nervous." He patted her head. "I don't think you should stay. You can come check on me in an hour."

She resisted the order, just a little bit. "Please, Master Draco," she squeaked, and then vanished, hitting herself on the head as she did to punish herself for that resistance. Draco did feel a bit bad for her stress, but she was worrying unnecessarily.

Draco rested his palms on the edge of the desk and looked over his preparations, taking a final inventory. Knife, belt, wand, bowl of water and cloth, towel, blood clotting potion, blood thinning potion, blood replenishing potion, plate. He'd already taken the Wit Sharpening potion to make sure his mind was clear and focused.

He began rolling up his left sleeve, stoically. He hated the Dark Mark. He had set eyes on it probably only a dozen times in the years since Voldemort's death, and in the years of his reign, looking at it had been more like picking at a wound. He kept his arm covered at all times if he could help it. Any time it was exposed, he was acutely aware of it, and if it happened to brush against any other part of his skin he swore he could feel it, like something contagious, contaminating anything it touched.

He could also withstand a great deal of pain. He didn't like to, obviously — he was a coward, and pain hurt. But he'd had a lot more practice at it than anyone should.

The Dark Mark was completely indelible; it had faded, but it would never disappear, and no potion, spell, or artefact would ever lift it. However, Voldemort had completely despised all things nonmagical, and thoroughly undervalued and overlooked the potential power in anything not a wizard of pure blood.

Those three facts seemed to naturally go together, and culminate in the form of the knife he had asked Tolly to bring him. Would the great Lord Voldemort ever consider that someone would dare take something as banal as a kitchen knife to his distinguished mark?

The tattoo on his forearm leered at him as he folded the sleeve up one last turn above his knobby elbow. It was a trick of his eyes and his hatred for it, of course, but it gave the unsettling impression of moving under his skin as he moved his arm. The black of the skull and snake was faint; it would have taken a real effort to actually see, on a more normal skin colour, and even against his paleness it was only a grey blemish. But to him, it may as well have been glowing.

He wrapped the belt around his arm, between the sleeve and his elbow, and yanked it tight, then a little tighter once it began to hurt. He knew he couldn't allow himself to bleed any more than necessary; his blood didn't clot, it just flowed unabated, and it could be dangerous. He had a potion standing by in case he absolutely had to, but the blood thickeners came with their own dangers: at least once they had cause a clot in his brain that affected his mind, a stroke, and that was one of the most terrifying things he had ever experienced. Which was why he had in turn a blood thinning potion, in case he needed to treat that. Ideally, he would use neither of them.

He flexed his left hand to experiment with the way it was starting to go numb, then pulled the towel over to rest his arm upon, and picked up the knife, testing it in his hand. It was heavier than he expected, not balanced like a wand; he swished it around a little to get accustomed to it. The dexterity of practised wand skills translated over well, and once he was used to the balance, he could control the tip of it with confidence.

All right, now…

He clenched his fist to tauten the skin, set the tip of the knife against his skin at the top of the skull, and pressed it in. The skin dimpled for a second, forced him to press harder than he'd thought he would have to, and then it suddenly went in. He hissed in pain and yanked the knife back out on reflex. A drop of blood welled up in the puncture, swelled and balanced on top of his arm, and when its weight became too much finally rolled over the edge of his arm and slid down to the towel, leaving a trail of red over the bare skin.

All right, that was all right. He just hadn't been prepared. But it proved he could do it. Now he just had to.

He put the knife point back to his skin near the first mark before he could think about it too much and pressed it in, drawing blood a second time. He hissed in a pained breath again, but it didn't stop him this time. The blade ploughed its way through the skin, digging a furrow across the top of the skull.

In a few seconds, that became too much, and he yanked the knife away and pressed it flat against the table, head bowed, shakily trying to catch his breath. His arm seared. But he was making progress.

When he opened his eyes and forced himself to look at Voldemort's mark, he was dismayed to realise the cut was maybe two inches long, weeping blood over the side of his arm but otherwise to very little effect. It had felt so much bigger than that. It wasn't even properly connected to the first puncture he had made. If that was all he could do at a time, he was going to chew his arm into dogmeat before he accomplished anything…

He wet the cloth and wiped away the blood with a hiss, and then pressed it firmly over the area. The cold felt good; it had a side effect of also covering the Dark Mark from view, which made him feel like he could think more clearly because it wasn't watching him. Feeling the throbbing of his arm under his hand gave him a moment to breathe.

He set aside the cloth, flexing his left hand again — with some difficulty, as the numbness now had it feeling distant and clumsy — and watching the cuts move. The second one opened a tiny amount and let another line of blood escape, but the tourniquet was doing its job and he wasn't bleeding all that much. He traced the jagged line of the cuts with his eyes.

He was trying to be too gentle. Or too careful. There was nothing he was going to do that would mitigate the pain, so he shouldn't be trying to. He needed to be more decisive. Just do it.

With an absent nod, he picked up the knife, then changed his mind and instead untucked the end of the belt that was wrapped around his upper arm, pulled it taut, and held it between his teeth. Then he set the blade against the long side of the skull, pressed until he felt it and saw blood, and then yanked it toward his wrist in one sharp motion. His cry of pain was muffled in the belt, and he slammed the knife back onto the desk, fumbling around for his wand. When his fingers found it, he Silenced himself and released the belt from his teeth, panting for breath.

The cut was better this time. Much longer and neater. And bleeding more. There was blood flowing from it in several distinct rivulets, soaking into the towel under his arm. The cut wasn't at the perfect angle, but it was most of the length of the mark.

Just do that again, a few more times…

He pulled the belt tighter, trying to cut off the blood, held it in his teeth again, and picked up the knife. He told himself he wasn't going to put it down again until he was done.

Starting at the upper long side of the mark, he made another long slice, and then a series of a few short ones around the bottom of the snake, carving straight lines in an approximation of a curve. The skin moved around, making it hard to pull a smooth line, leaving jagged starts and stops in the cuts; he needed another hand to hold himself down. He had to scream once, but he was Silenced so it didn't matter.

When he had done as much as he could like that, he stopped for a moment, resting the edge of the knife on the desk, panting raggedly around the leather in his teeth. His right hand was shaking around the knife. He didn't let it go, though. He wasn't done.

The Dark Mark was roughly outlined in straightish lines, not neat, but amateurish, overlapping where they should have started, sticking out unnecessarily far into the skin or leaving gaps of unbroken skin where they didn't meet, some at awkward angles where the skin had shifted or the curve of his arm sent the knife awry. Blood was running from the cuts, squeezed out and smeared onto the Dark Mark, running tickling down the sides of his arm to soak into the towel. There was blood not only on the knife, but the desk where it had touched, and soaked into the edge of his other sleeve where he had brushed it unknowingly.

He lifted the blade again, and noticed how unsteadily it was shaking in his hand, so closed his eyes and took a deep, steadying breath. Opening his eyes, he breathed deeply and stared at the tip of the knife until it quavered under his will and behaved, going still.

Carefully, he slid the point of the blade into the edge of one of the cuts, hissing a small breath through his nose, and then laid it almost flat, so that it wasn't going down into his arm but over it, under the edge of the skin by a few fractions of an inch. He made sharp, short slices at the corner of the cut that way, lengthening it step by step toward the next cut, and when they nearly joined he had to shift the knife so that he was digging the point into the thin wall of flesh between them and yank it up to break that last thread of skin.

It hurt. It hurt like hell. But there was a kind of clarity and focus that went along with it, a satisfaction in seeing progress on his goal. He gritted his teeth on the belt, panted through his nose, and focused on joining the next pair of cuts. And the next. He could feel in his throat that he would be making noises, but he couldn't hear them and it was fine. He didn't pretend he was brave about pain. Just that it wouldn't stop him.

The first cuts, at the top of the skull, were the most problematic. The angle was awkward and the skin was torn up in small sections. He finally gave up on the careful approach, there, and instead laid the length of the blade half an inch below the original abortive cuts, took a breath, and sawed it forward in a swift slice. The skin shifted and dimpled instead of parting, needed more pressure, and then when it gave the knife bit deeply into the wasted muscle and scraped bone, and he screamed, ripping the knife out and shaking.

It took a very long moment before he got a grip on that screeching pulse of pain, and in that time, blood was running freely from that deep cut and into the towel, slowly spreading the red. But it was done. The entire Dark Mark was encircled in cuts, moats of blood, quarantined, separated from the rest of his skin. It was no longer part of him. Now it was just stuck to him.

His breath was ragged, but he lifted the trembling blade again. Nearly finished. Just to get it off, now.

He took up the wet cloth to wipe the blood from one section of the mark, squeezing the cut closed for a second to interrupt the flow so that he'd be able to see what he was doing. Then he carefully inserted the knife into the cut again and once again angled it so that he could slide it under the skin. Much further this time, not just the edges as before, but full inches, slowly working it back and forth, forward, between the skin and the muscle, biting back whimpers of pain with every stroke as the blade scraped under his skin. The snake seemed to writhe as it bulged with the knife under it, like it was trying to escape from his skin.

It wasn't neat work, at first. He got the angle wrong and shaved too close to the surface, and the tip of the knife came up through the skin, poking through the snake's mouth in a way that made him weirdly ill. Then, trying to adjust for the curve of his arm, he overcorrected and bit too deep, cutting into the muscle, and that made him cry out silently and stop for a long moment.

Maybe it would have hurt less if he were quicker, but for this it only seemed right to be methodical and careful.

It was quickly pointless to try to sop up the blood, and he let it flow. It got on his fingers and made the knife slick in his hand, and obscured what he was doing so he was operating almost entirely on feel. The towel was sodden and it was getting on the desk.

He found the rhythm, though, the right angle and depth that let the skin part almost easily from the muscle beneath. He scraped through the connective tissues and worked his way up toward the elbow, and then it happened. The tip of the blade came out the top. With a few more quick, careful, painful slices of the knife, it was finished. The entire Dark Mark peeled up, on a single solid flap of skin wider than his hand and longer than the blade of the knife. He balanced it carefully on the blade and transferred it whole to the plate, adjusting the ragged edges just so to spread it out. A pathetic grey, faded testament to Voldemort's will and control, and it was gone.

He was drunk on success. He didn't even care about the pain or the slightly woozy feeling of blood loss, it was done. He had done it. He was free.

He hadn't meant to end the silencing spell on himself, but he must have because he heard himself laugh, and he didn't want to stop. He grabbed the cloth and pressed it over the skinned muscle, hissing in pain but still laughing as he slid down a bit in his chair, looking toward the ceiling. It was finally done. It was finally over.

"Fuck you, Tom Riddle," he laugh-sobbed in a surprisingly hoarse voice. Maybe he'd been screaming more than he realised.

Okay, his arm was really hurting. He made himself sit up and, with a wince, peeled the cloth from his arm, wiping away as much blood as possible from the exposed muscle. It was a weird sight, disturbing, glistening wet and red—

And black. As he wiped the space clean, the black loomed out of the blood, skull and snake as vibrantly dark as it had ever been on his skin, engrained in the twitching fibres of the working muscle.

He shrieked and staggered out of the chair like he could get away from his own arm, stumbling a step further and then falling to his knees, retching. His head was swimming, either from the blood loss or the cold laughter pounding through it…

"Tolly," he croaked faintly, hand over his mouth, and heard her Apparate beside him. Her hand on his elbow was searing pain. "I think you should get some help now…"

#whumptober2023 #no.22 #alternate prompt #body modification #fic #harry potter #self harm tw #self mutilation tw #gore tw #blood cw #draco malfoy #tolly the house elf #self whump #draco whumpee #house elf caretaker #draco in his 20s #draco is injured #splendidissimus writing #whumptober 2023

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kyanitesaphire · 1 year

Text

Lightning In A Bottle chapter 3

Spencer could feel all eyes on him as he settled in at his desk the next day. His team wasn’t even subtle about it. He did his best to ignore them and not give in to their wordless curiosity. If they wanted to know something, they would have to ask for it themselves. Nearly twenty minutes of solid focused work had passed before Derek finally gave in to his burning curiosity and spoke up.

“Ok kid, spill it. How did it go last night with you and your mistress of the hunt.” Spencer furrowed his brows at Derek’s choice of nickname.

“It went well…Mistress of the hunt? Really?”

“Yeah. Her and her hounds. Were they as big as they sounded?”

“Bigger believe it or not.” Spencer boasted as he pulled out the photo printouts and held them up. Derek got up from his desk to inspect the images.

“Woah! Damn, you ain’t kidding. The one on your lap looks as big as a horse.” Derek exclaimed. “So which ones which?”

“That one’s Zeus and that’s Raijin.” Spencer distinguished while pointing them out in the photo. He drew Derek’s attention to the second photo. “And that is Éclair.”

“Alright, I see how it is. You like a foxy lady with a little spunk.” Derek teased gesturing to the blue streaks and trimming in her hair. Spencer tried and failed horribly to conceal his amusement with his comrades speculation. The other hyper vigilant members of the team who had been listening in all sprung from their desks upon hearing that there was a picture of this mysterious new woman in Spencer’s life, eager to get a glimpse for themselves. They all gushed over the pictures although Penelope’s focus was more on the dogs. “So tell me, when you say ‘it went well' how well are we talking?”

“Oh! Yes! Do tell, I want all of the details! Was it like a 90’s rom-com? Was there intense passion and romance?” Penelope inquired hastily.

“I’m not sure what kind of dog walks you go on that would include ‘intense passion and romance’ Garcia, but I can tell you this was not one of them.” Spencer said in a calm but concerned tone. “As to how well it went exactly, well, I’m supposed to go to her place for a movie night so long as we don’t get a case today.”

“Oh yeah? And how does this Lurch fella feel about that? And who is he by the way?” Derek asked.

“He's her guardian apparently. His job is to basically keep her in line and take care of her until she’s deemed fit to be on her own.” Spencer explained pulling out Éclair’s file from his bag and setting it on his desk. “And as to how he feels about my spending time with her, I believe his words were ‘you could bend her over the kitchen table and pound her ass like mochi for all I care.’” He added with slight disgust. Derek winced and chuckled at the unsolicited mental picture of Spencer doing exactly that. JJ and Penelope also seemed uncomfortable with the raunchy comment, mostly due to the jarring juxtaposition of such a statement being reiterated by the naïve and gentle doctor.

“Charming.” Derek retorted sarcastically as he made his way back to his own desk. To avoid Spencer going on one of his more than informative tangents, JJ quickly googled what mochi was on her phone and instantly regretted it as the already unsettling mental image she had became violently more so .

Between tasks, Spencer took it upon himself to do a bit of research into this Dr.Jericho person. Although this doctor did indeed have his own small clinic, his reputation still remained shrouded in obscurity. All he could ascertain from the limited publicly accessible resources , was the location of said clinic, and where Dr.Jericho’s expertise lie. There were no pages dedicated to any of his dissertations, the site for his clinic was bare bones at best, and he couldn’t find a single picture of the doc in question. This seemed suspicious to Spencer considering even hospitals plastered their walls and media with images of their medical and administrative staff in an attempt to put a human face to the corporate machine that is American healthcare. If Spencer wanted any concrete information on Jericho, he’d need a Garcia level search. At this point that seemed like a gross misuse of government resources.

Thinking back on the scans of Éclair’s brain reminded him of a case from about two years prior. Anton Harris had abducted a pair of students, one of which was his sister, and preformed lobotomies on them, rendering them incapable of speech and had implanted tiny cameras into their eyes. The memory of Dana Harris being lobotomized via live stream for the world to see still haunted him from time to time. There were certain uncomfortable similarities between the Harris case and Éclair’s. The vicious yet skillfully executed lobotomy, the targeting of an individual who wouldn’t be missed, the apparent escape/possible release. Unfortunately Éclair’s case lacked an obvious motive. What was to be gained from doing this to her, or anyone for that matter? There was one more alarming oversight from the Harris case that Spencer wasn’t going to make again; previous attempts, failed or otherwise. He compiled a series of notes and comparisons on how to proceed with an investigation should another victim be found and the case be appointed to them. Until then, this was as far as he dared to delve, not wanting to get Garcia in trouble. He slipped his notes into the folder with Éclair’s information and tucked it safely away into his drawer.

The day had passed uneventfully, with no cases coming up requiring their immediate attention. As Spencer packed up his things to leave, he whipped out his cell and called Éclair just as promised. The line trilled repeatedly and he waited patiently for someone to pick up.

“Hey doc. Éclair told me you’d call.” Lurch’s gruff voice came through. “Am I telling her you’re on your way?”

“Umm, yeah….” Spencer confirmed “why do you have her phone again?”

“I just hadn’t given it back yet after her appointment. Which, speaking of, must have been a rough one for her this time.” Lurch informed. “She’s still pretty out of it. Maybe you should do us all a favour and bring her some comfort food or something on your way over.”

“Ok, what exactly should I bring?” Spencer asked.

“Fuck if I know.” Lurch grumbled.

“What’s that supposed to mean? You’re her caretaker, you should know!” Spencer scolded.

“Look, all I know is when women get moody, they eat junk food and cry about their problems to their best friends.” Lurch explained. Spencer rolled his eyes at the rather sexist generalization. “So since she’s not talking yet, I figured we could ply her with whatever girls eat when they’re sad.”

“Oh yes, let’s just default to the more toxic coping methods, because nothing could possibly go wrong there.” Spencer groaned sarcastically. He pressed the elevator button firmly and stood back, waiting for the doors to open. “I’ll figure something out, but I need to head home and change first. I don’t feel like having my good clothes covered in fur again.” He let out an exasperated sigh and vigorously rubbed at his eye with his fingertips.

“Ha, I thought it was an improvement.” Lurch joked, to which Spencer replied with a mock laugh. ”Alright Dr.Loverboy, we’ll see you in a bit.” With that the call was disconnected.

“Dr.Loverboy?” Spencer muttered under his breath with a confused grimace as he boarded the elevator and pocketed his phone.

Spencer rang the doorbell while precariously balancing a hot chocolate on a box of Éclair's favoured namesake pastry. Unlike his previous visit, there was no barrage of barking from inside. He also didn’t hear the heavy footfalls of Lurch approaching the door. Instead the door swung open and an elegant raven haired woman with piercing violet eyes greeted him.

“Hey! You’re Éclair's friend, right? Spencer was it?” She asked as she stepped aside to allow him in.

“Yeah, hi!” He spat out, startled “Sorry, I was expecting Lurch to answer the door.” He stepped in and immediately kicked his shoes off.

“Herald is in the living room, I’m Yen by the way, Herald’s girlfriend.” Yen explained as she scooped up Spencer’s shoes and placed them on the rack for him. Lurch came around the corner and eyed the footwear his girlfriend was putting away.

“Good grief, please tell me you’re going shoe shopping tomorrow. Those things are an embarrassment.” Lurch mocked.

“Oh please babe, you’re one to talk. At least his shoes are clean, which is more than I can say you and your nasty Kodiaks .” Yen scolded.

“ You’re kidding right? They look like burgundy suede bowling shoes. Hardly appropriate for a man of his profession.” Lurch rebutted, cocky as usual.

“And those monstrosities are appropriate for a man of yours?” Yen said. “Honestly he’s better dressed than you, that’s for sure.” Lurch rolled his eyes and shook his head at the comment.

“Éclair’s upstairs in her room with the boys. The doors open.” Lurch gestured up the stairs before turning away and ushering Yen with him back into the living room.

“It was nice seeing you.” Yen called out over her shoulder before disappearing into the living room. Spencer nodded quietly in affirmation before ascending to the second floor.

He peered into Éclair’s room and tapped lightly on her open door, gaining the immediate attention of Zeus and Raijin. Both behemoths clamored off the enormous bed and rushed toward him, herding him toward Éclair who was still reclined on the bed. She laid there prone, exposed and she had an air of defeat about her. Garbed in only a black band tank top and black boyshort panties, her hair loose and splayed out over her pillow as she stared blankly up at the ceiling. He did his best not to stare too long at her strong bare legs as he was pushed closer and closer until his knees bumped the mattress. The jostling of the bed stirred her from her trance and she sat up, pulling out her ear buds.

“Hey, h-how are you?” Spencer stammered, clearing his throat. “I uh, I brought you a hot chocolate and some eclairs.” He held them out to her for her to accept. She gave the hot chocolate a vacant glance and slowly dragged her eyes up to meet Spencer’s. Once their eyes locked, a faint smile slowly spread across her lips and she reached up to take the cup from him.

“You remembered what I like? That’s so sweet.” She uttered softly, a hint of joy weaving through her voice. She brought the cup to her lips and imbibed a hefty swig of the warm beverage, letting out a relieved sigh afterwards.

“Um… I have to ask…but… why aren’t you wearing pants?” He asked nervously still trying to keep his gaze respectively off her exposed lower half. “Did…did Lurch not tell you I was coming?” Éclair cocked her head in confusion, then looked down at her half naked state.

“I’m sure I had pants… I know I did. Lurch told me you were coming over, Yen helped me draw a bath, and I set clothes aside for after…” She walked herself through the events before Spencer’s arrival, her eyes scanned the room as she did. Then she saw it. She did indeed set pajama pants aside to wear, but in her dissociative state she forgot to put them on, only getting half dressed. “…oops! There they are.” She got up from the bed, brushing up against Spencer as she passed. Although the notion of privacy had become a moot point, Spencer kept his back to her while she donned her bottoms. Zeus nudged Spencer’s arm with his nose, Éclair’s ribbon and bells hanging from his mouth, offering them up to him. He set the pastries down on the bed as he received the accessory from the canine comrade. He turned to offer it back to Éclair and found her all ready munching away on the sweet snacks, her fingers covered in the chocolatey confection. She patted the top of her head with her free hand when she caught a glimpse of the adornment in Spencer’s grasp.

“Would you like me to put this in for you?” Spencer offered and Éclair nodded her approval as she sucked the sugary residue off her fingers. He sat on the edge of her bed with his legs set apart for her to seat herself between them. Once she was situated, he went to work combing the top portion of her hair together with his fingers gently raking his nails along her scalp before wrapping the silky ribbon around the partitioned cluster of strands. “So, what movie did you want to watch tonight?”

“I have a few picked out. I don’t know what one to start with though.” She explained. She wrapped her arms around Spencer’s legs, hugging them closer to her as she relaxed under his touch. After he tied the bow, he gave the bells a light shake letting her know he was done and could stand up. When she rose to her feet she turned to face Spencer, placing her hands where his neck and shoulders met. As he gazed up into her eyes he could see a significant improvement in her mood but she still wasn’t her usual self.

“Well, why don’t we start with one that seems the most lighthearted. Something feel-good.” He suggested. She thought for a moment before making her decision and stepping away from Spencer to set up her selection. The Princess Bride.

“Ok, scoot over closer to the middle of the bed.” Éclair ordered as she grabbed the remote and climbed back into the bed next to Spencer. She leaned over him to turn of the bedside lamp, eliminating the glare on the television screen and hit the play button. Once the movie began both Zeus and Raijin jumped up into the bed on either side and laid out next to them facing the tv.

“And this is why I changed out of my nice clothes before coming here.” Spencer commented as he rested his arm on Zeus’s back like a sofa.

“ You’re telling me that sweater is part of your not nice clothing?” Éclair asked as she inspected the garment.

“More like it’s one I’m not particularly attached to. I haven’t worn it in nearly 9 years and I rarely wore it then. Plus most of the fur wont be noticeable against the white anyway.” He explained. Éclair reached over and ran her fingers over the ornate embroidered dragon.

“That’s a shame. I like it, and it looks good on you.” She confessed as she hunkered down to watch the film. The two of them discussed and commented on the various scenes rather than observe in silence.

“I can’t get over the eerie similarity between the Spaniard and my old mentor at the BAU.” Spencer said uncomfortably.

“ Like a doppelganger? They say everyone has one out there somewhere. I’m sure you have one too.” Éclair postulated.

“Oh yes, and then we come to find out my cinematic doppelganger appears in a film as an unfortunate and foulmouthed tradesman who gets swept up in a burglary and whirlwind killing spree by his psychotic and promiscuous girlfriend.” Spencer joked.

“Sounds like a good movie. I’d watch it. Especially with a lead actor that sexy.” She added, elbowing him playfully. Spencer tried to laugh off the compliment feeling his cheeks tingle with embarrassment. When the movie ended, Éclair rolled half onto Spencer to look up at him. “How bout we watch one more?”

“As you wish.” He responded trying to remain serious as he quoted the movie they just watched, but as they maintained eye contact both of them devolved into a fit of giggles. Éclair shuffled down to swap out the movies putting in Who Framed Roger Rabbit and crawling back into bed.

Neither one of them stayed awake till the end of the movie.

When Spencer awoke, there was a hefty weight bearing down on his chest and both his arms were immobilized by a chilling numbness. He looked down at his body to see that during the night Zeus had situated his front half over Spencer’s leg and Éclair had rolled over on top of his chest. This pinned one arm down and elevated the other greatly inhibiting blood flow to both extremities, painfully numbing them. His shifting roused his bedmates from their slumber. Both of the dogs jumped out of bed, leaving the room and Éclair sat up just enough to look at Spencer who winced as his incapacitate arm fell hard onto the bed.

“Morning, you alright?” Éclair asked, noticing his pained expression.

“Yeah, I can’t move though.” He groaned quietly as he tried to improve the circulation in his limbs. She watched him writhe helplessly, unable to gain control of his arms and a mischievous smirk crept across her lips.

“So are you telling me your essentially helpless and at my mercy?” she teased.

“ Uh oh…should I be worried?” he asked, his voice cracking nervously.

“I don’t know. That depends on how much you like me I guess.” She replied coyly, climbing over to straddle his waist.

“What if I said I like you a fair bit?” Spencer mused as he picked up on her implication. Éclair leaned forward, holding onto his biceps and massaging them with her fingertips.

“Well then, I think you’ll be quite excited.” With that she closed the gap between them, locking their lips in a sensuous kiss. At first, the taste and feel of her lips on his caused everything inside of him to freeze up as though an electrical current were coursing through him. Then the proverbial flood gates opened. His heart pounded in his chest and his lips lunged into action, reciprocating the kiss. Éclair ran her hand up and down Spencer’s arms sending a tide of pins and needles to ebb and flow through this fingers as he began to regain feeling in them. He willed his arms to move, bending his stiff elbows to reach up and haphazardly cup her jaw in his tingling hands while hers found purchase in his messy locks. It was in this moment that he realized exactly how intimately touch starved he really was. Like the first rain on the Mesa plains after a grueling drought, he drank in the heated passion and relished in the petrichor of this moment.

Unfortunately the moment was cut short by an unapologetic intrusion.

“You know, you’d think I never feed you with how voraciously you’re eating his face.” Lurch said as he leaned against the doorframe.

“Mnnn, just taking advantage of the moment.” Éclair purred more to Spencer than to Lurch.

“Yeah, well if you and the moment want to come down for breakfast, it’s time for you to take your meds.” Lurch retorted, pushing himself off the doorframe and down the hall. Spencer and Éclair both rolled their eyes as they looked back to each other.

“If I had full control of my fingers, I’d show him how many moments he could wait.” Spencer quipped

“Oh, dose it happen to be this many?” Éclair asked as she held his hand up and folded down his thumb, index, ring and pinky fingers.

“Yeah, pretty much.” He agreed with a laugh.

“ I was thinking the same thing.” She kissed him again before dismounting him and pulling him up to his feet. She quickly noticed the swell in his pants and pursed her lips before speaking again. “Now as much as I’d like the ego boost, I’m aware that that is not all me. Bathroom is just down the hall.” She pointed in the opposite direction Lurch went. Spencer cleared his throat and looked down at himself sheepishly, trying to decide if he should make the comment that was on his mind.

“I’d say it’s a bit more than 50/50 in your favour.” He clarified playfully before heading toward the lavatory.

By the time he had finished with the facilities, Éclair had gotten dressed for the day and fixed her hair. As she emerged from her room, her steps rang with the pleasant jingling he had quickly grown fond of.

“Ah! Perfect timing! Let’s get some breakfast before we get any more lip from snoopy downstairs.” She chirped, holding her hand out for Spencer to take. When they set foot into the kitchen/dining room, Yen greeted them with a warm smile as she set out a large bowl of scrambled eggs on the table.

“Morning you two. Did you have a nice evening last night?” Yen sang with a wink. “I saw you guys cuddled up together. You were so cute I couldn’t bring myself to wake you.” Spencer’s cheeks flushed at the remark but Éclair was unbothered by it.

“We watched Princess Bride and started watching Roger Rabbit when we passed out.” Éclair answered as she poured herself a drink.

“In flight peanuts, coming through.” Lurch called out, tossing a small pre sealed packet of pills to Éclair.

“Pharmaceutic-o's, an important part of this mentally balanced breakfast.” Éclair mimicked being on a cereal commercial, eliciting a laugh from Spencer and Yen. She downed the meds and grabbed a plate for her and Spencer to serve themselves up some food, discarding the now empty packaging from her pills onto the table. As she shoveled up a heaping scoop of eggs and dumped them on her plate, Lurch came up behind her and dispensed a generous helping of bacon next to them.

“Eat up. I’m not going easy on you today. I don’t want to hear the excuse ‘but I’m too hungry!’” He said whining the last part.

“yeah, yeah. I’m going for a run later though.” Éclair said waving him off as she split a piece of bacon, eating one half and feeding the other to Raijin.

“If you want, I can take you to the rink tonight. That is if you and Spencer here don’t already have plans.” Yen suggested with a sly wink.

“What do you say, Spencer? Wanna tag along?” Éclair exclaimed excitedly.

“I appreciate the invitation, but I’m not really one for athletics. I’ve never gone skating before either.” Spencer chuckled nervously as he shuffled the small mound of eggs around on his plate. “Besides, I should probably get home soon and catch up on some tidying. I don’t know when I’ll get another chance with how busy I get with work.”

“ Well there’s a first time for everything!” Éclair said nudging Spencer with her shoulder .

“Maybe you can join us another time.”

“Where do you live? We can drop you off on our way.” Lurch asked Spencer as he sat down to his own breakfast.

“Hoover street.” Spencer answered. “What are you two up to anyway?”

“Hand to hand combat training. I hope to teach her restraint when defending herself.” Lurch explained. Once Éclair finished her meal, she got up from the table and jogged up the stairs, her bells jingling behind her. Once she was out of ear shot he continued. “Its about the only thing I can teach her restraint in. Some girls will say ‘Let’s take things slow.’ I don’t think that’s something she has any concept of, so have fun on the Autobahn.” Spencer leaned away from Lurch and toward Yen, feigning discretion before speaking to her.

“If he’s always this much of a jerk, what do you see in him?”

“It’s all a façade, I assure you. He’s really just a big old papa bear"

#criminal minds #spencer reid #spencer x oc #spencer reid x oc #fanfic

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emcads · 1 year

Note

So if you’re in the mood to talk about tpof (again!), I was thinking it’s a real crime that we didn’t get to know how Esme felt about anything since the battle with Borya to meeting Amenirdis. Like what was she thinking specially about the magical princess aboard Jack’s ship who definitely had something for him? Was she jealous like she’d been with Tia Dalma (although I still think it might’ve been just Jack thinking that)? Curious?

oh, you know me, anon. i’m always in the mood to talk about tpof.

this got unexpectedly long so i’m popping it below a cut <3

i think this is an interesting one bc esme’s jealousy itself is not very straightforward. she tries very very dearly not to be jealous, and not to let jack’s other relationships bother her: she wouldn’t be with the man if she remotely thought to expect fidelity, and deciding to continue to be with him is just the choice that she makes. but at the end of the day esmeralda is only human: of course it’s going to bother her to some extent / make her jealous, even if she’s deciding to deal with that herself rather than take that jealousy out on him. for the most part, it’s fine, jack is off gallivanting with sex workers, that’s how he is, and that’s how she’s always known pirates to be –– whether or not they’re in a committed relationship. what distinguishes tia dalma / amendiris as meriting legitimate jealousy in her eyes is the fact that she knows that there’s more to it than just a casual sex / purchased sex kind of thing. they’re both powerful, competent women who command not only jack’s affection but his respect ( much like herself ), possibly even his love in the case of amenirdis, though esmeralda can only make guesses on that count. probably her most immature line in the whole book is her little “is she pretty?” about tia dalma, but to me ... idk, that’s also one of her most honest moments, where’s she’s just genuine about the jealousy she’s feeling, about wanting to impress jack and wanting him, period.

and knowing, too, that she’s getting older, she’s not in her 20′s anymore as jack is. far be it from me to say she’s lost any amount of beauty, but she worries about it. physical appearance has been one of her practical tools in her field as well as access to romance.

anyway, i wouldn’t really call it a matter of competition, and honestly, she’s so frank and open and giving towards amenirdis that i just don’t see her as the type of girl that would ever let a man cause infighting and discord between herself and another woman. part of the reason she knows jack’s attachment so well is because she respects the hell out of these women too –– of course he’d fall for them, who wouldn’t ? but at the same time, she knows that she won’t ever really “measure up” to these women, in terms of power, or ability to captivate jack’s attention, or even to help him when he needs it, and I think that’s what really bothers her more so than the actual sex ( though on that count, she is human, so she’s thinking about that too even if she isn’t saying it ). esmeralda is already fighting a losing battle with his love for the pearl / captaincy with the eitc, so it’s ... a little distressing to know that he’s already very much being captivated by someone else. she doesn’t really stop to consider that he might not actually be romantically / sexually engaged with amenirdis the very moment she finds out she’s actually super hot, it’s practically a given knowing jack. but it’s also one more thing –– a very visibly, beautiful reminder –– that the man she’s in love with doesn’t think about her all that much, so that does hurt. ( especially when you consider she’s just dropped everything to save his entire ship and crew post-battle, not something he has done or would ever do for her ) and she handles it with grace, i think, especially meeting amenirdis where she’s at and treating her as an individual rather than in connection to jack.

i think ... her desire to meet ayisha/amenirdis is somewhat honest, and somewhat not. there’s definitely a petty part of her that wants to meet jack’s new love interest for herself and size her up, because of fucking course jack sparrow can’t leave port with an ugly woman without her being smoking hot by midvoyage. but what she says about wanting to meet her out of genuine admiration, and wanting to help her, is also true. she highly, highly respects women in positions of power, even those who were born into it, because she’s lived that life herself and knows how it can be, and tbh the opportunity to meet an actual royal isn’t one she’s about to pass up. her place of generosity also sort of ... comes from a place of knowing jack and his sartorial habits, and how content he is with the grime and ... other things, and making an educated guess that he hasn’t made her comfort a priority in that regard. so she’s able to relate to her, distantly, in the idea of being a well-born woman among pirates, who also desperately wants to bone jack.

edit: just to add that she’s certain they’re involved once she realizes amenirdis wants to be involved with him. jack will pretty much sleep with anyone willing, but that’s a non-negotiable point.

#i love these questions they always just draw out so many thoughts lol #meta tag tba #✘; THE WORLD IS GNAWED BY NAMELESS THINGS ( anonymous )#✘; I HAVE SEVENTY TWO EXAMS AND I HAVE NOT STUDIED FOR ONE ( ooc )#✘; LETTERS ( answered )

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thetrashywritingwitch · 2 years

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💮💮Heyyy, I have a really annoying pet peeve in romance fanfiction and wanted to know your opinion.

So I really hate it when the author goes like "x characher was in love with y character" despite them not even being friends?!?

And then they continue on to say that how x character was jealous and insecure about z character (who is presumably a hot person).

Although I don't see it as impossible, I dislike it when the pacing is too fast like, how can you be in love with someone who your not even friends with. You don't even know the person on a surface level basis, like how???

And from my understanding of love, it stems from feelings of trust, deep understanding and such, it seems like the author is describing a crush but framing it as love just cause they were too lazy to go in depth about how they were strangers to friend to pining idiots to lovers u know?

And I'm not saying all fics should go into every little detail about x and ys relationship, but at least make them friend (so the reader does the imagining) or just take the easy route and go x just had a crush. Idk am I just too sensitive abt these thing?

Alo remember to drink water and eat, our favourite author needs to stay healthy

_ stay safe, flower anon💮💮

YOOOO WE ARE ON THE SAME BIG BRAIN WAVELENGTH WHEN IT COMES TO PET PEEVES

i think this, in part, stems from romanticizing... romance, if that makes sense. as in, being enamored with the tropes of love/romance/falling in love/heavily cliched "love at first sight" premises, etc. when most of what we see in popular media just... isn't realistic or even relatable to the average person who has been in love

you can have a CRUSH on someone if you don't know them well. you can have immediate sexual or physical attraction to a complete stranger (i mean, that's what porn is, right?), you might even feel jealousy over this person being around others (this one is a toxic trait linked heavily with insecurity and immaturity, in general), etc.

but no, i don't believe in any kind of "love at first sight" mantra that many fics and headcanons unfortunately fall into because it's bullshit and not real lol. it's one thing i guess to... write about 😍😍😍 this fairytale-esque idea of just KNOWING you're in love with this person you barely know. maybe the "mysterious stranger" appeal is in there somewhere, or the "they're so cool/unapproachable/popular that i'd never have a chance, so i'll just fantasize an imaginary version of them in my head that seems like my perfect match in every way and then project that onto the REAL character/person who might not really act like that at all, destroying the fantasy"

y'know, like that!

the horrible pacing is also annoying. i mean... there's a reason my fic is fucking 500k words at this point and uhhh for 3/4 of that, "love" was not in the mix. this is kiiiiinda why scenarios where they start off as just barely knowing each other or friends-of-friends or polite coworkers or something tosses me for a loop when all of a sudden things go from 3 to 99 really fucking quickly with like, zero buildup or anticipation.

but its also people writing what they want for free on the internet that's, in most cases, completely self indulgent and less for us as content consumers and more as "i wanna write this thing" where real scenarios have little say (i have a *thing* against yandere/abuse/really imbalanced power dynamics/age gaps being romanticized and easily publicly accessible because it can and does give the wrong impression about certain situations that put irl people in danger. there's def those ppl out there who will see a stalking/obsession/controlling dynamic in a fic and think it would be awesome to have someone obsessed with them, some kind of dream come true... and like yes! those types of kinks do exist! and can happen SAFELY with CONSENTING ADULTS who are into that! but not everyone (esp minors, no offense, sorry) who stumble on this kind of thing might be able to distinguish between consenting kink and romanticizing abuse)

.... that got OFF TOPIC but its still important lkajsl;kfjaf ANYWAY-

yeah. basically, i agree and it's annoying lol but it's best to just don't read/block if you run into it and move onto things you DO enjoy reading

i did drink a lot of wooder today and i made a yummy creamy tuscan chicken recipe for dinner 😤

thanks flower anon 💮

#abuse tw #manipulation tw #yandere tw

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mostrandomgallery · 2 years

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Introducing...the Lotus Maid Squad!

The Lotus Maid Squad is a team of five professional housemaids. Hailing from Italy, they actually have an impressive resumé. They have worked as not only maids, but also royal bodyguards for an Italian queen back in the year 2044. Since they feel extremely loyal to their liege, the have gone on to serve the former queen as she moved up in her career to represent Italy in the Global Republic. Now, they reside in New York City as they maintain the upkeep of the penthouse apartment residence of Senator Patrice Amaretti. Surprisingly, four of these five maids have known Patrice since childhood (they were all classmates at an all-girls school in Rome). They are called the "Lotus Maid Squad" because Patrice's favorite flower is the Indian Lotus, so their name signifies their allegiance to the senator. Alternatively, they also go by the "Lily Pads", since lily pads surround lotuses in ponds. You could think of it this way: the Amaretti residence would be a pond ecosystem where Patrice=Lotus, Maids=Lily Pads.

I'm just gonna cut to the chase. If anyone of you are following me for J.E.D.I., and you have a good grasp on who Patrice is, then you'll probably get that these maids are supposed to be based off of Padmé's handmaidens. Unlike the rest of the characters in this story, I chose to approach them a different way. While most of the characters are straightforward parodies (Alexis=Ahsoka, Obadiah=Obi-Wan, Anatole=Anakin, etc.), I decided to create these girls based on combining traits of several handmaidens into particular roles (the decoy, the stylist, etc.) instead of a specific handmaiden for each one, because I did some research and found that there are over 18 handmaidens in canon (and Legends) that are little more than just a background extra and a name that rhymes with Padmé (with a few exceptions such as Teckla and Duja). In some cases, I even added traits not seen in the movies. Before you say anything, I'm aware that there is a novel series about Padmé and her handmaidens, but I heard some things and read some reviews about it that made me not want to read it (and Padmé is my favorite character, but I'll sacrifice); I'll just stick to this one Queen Amidala Journal I have to reread anytime I want. Plus, I wanted to have fun assigning super-tropey anime personalities to the handmaidens in my AU.

And now, here's a summary on each of Patty's maids.

Caprice Zeppole: Hailing from Florence, Caprice is Patrice's childhood friend, having known her the longest (since preschool!), and is in charge of apartment security alongside Captain Guido Togni (Patrice's security guard and chauffeur). Despite lacking a blood relation, the two look nearly identical, but there is one feature to distinguish them: Patrice has a beauty mark on her left cheek, while Caprice doesn't. Personality wise, the two could not be anymore different. While Patrice is calm and confident, Caprice is a ball of never-ending hyperactive energy who idolizes the senator and is her biggest fangirl; she admires the senator for being everything this maid isn't: classy, stylish, sociable, determined, and just overall a role model for aspiring young senators. Caprice can also be a bit clingy, often surprise-hugging Patrice at inopportune times (think Himeko Katagiri from Pani Poni Dash!). Due to their looks, Patrice and Caprice can actually switch places with each other's clothes (Anatole can tell who's who with his ESP, however). At one point Caprice was jealous of Patrice for marrying Anatole (What girl wouldn't be? He's so handsome with his pretty face, soft blue eyes, and honey-hued mane.), but she got over it and supports the happy couple wholeheartedly. In fact, she likes to use the couple as inspiration for writing fantasy romance stories, though she changes their names to "Caelius" and "Flora" (those are actually pseudonyms that Anatole and Patrice got married under). Once, Caprice (in disguise) survived a plane bombing on a day known as "That Foggy Morning in NYC". Also, she often prances around singing "Yo-ho, yo-ho, a housemaid's life for me!", and has never been to Boston in the fall.

Clarice Sfogliatelle: A Venetian native, Clarice is the maid in charge of cleaning and tidiness at the Amaretti residence. She is shy and soft-spoken, often twiddles her fingers when talking (think Hinata from Naruto), and is slightly clumsy; sometimes tripping over stuff. Despite her clumsiness, she is great at making the apartment appear spick-and-span spotless. When getting ready to clean, she pretends to be a magical girl with her cleaning equipment, chanting, "Every speck of dust—all grime, rust, and leftover pizza crust...meets their doom fair and just; their cleansing away is a must! And my word, you can trust, ‘cause around Clarice, it’s clean or bust!”. She is a contrast to Caprice's hyperactivity. Fun fact: I almost considered changing Clarice's name due to discovering a character in an anime game called "The Idolmaster: Cinderella Girls" who had the same name and was in a maid costume, but after some research, learned she's just an earnable character in the game and only had a maid cosplay card, alongside other cards with different-themed outfits. So my character is distinct enough. Besides, there's a number of pink-haired Sakuras in anime; all of which are different from one another.

Denise Torrone: Born in Milan, Denise is a maid with a rather haughty personality. She is Patrice's personal stylist; designing and coordinating all her outfits and hairstyles. Whenever possible, she will boast about how she is the true mind behind the senator's flawless looks. In fact, she will often proclaim that it's thanks to her that Patrice is always so fashionable, announcing "The Senator's Wardrobe was provided by Yours Truly!" and apparently, according to the other maids, laughing like a rich noblewoman with her annoying "Ohohohohoho!!!" laugh (think Constance from Fire Emblem: Three Houses). She originally wanted to be a fashion designer with her own brand and everything, but enjoys being in service to a prominent senator.

Elise Pizzelle: Born in Naples, Elise appears emotionless and speaks in a monotone voice. Of all the maids, she doesn't really have a special field such as security, cleaning, or fashion design. She's just...there. For this reason, she refers to herself as an NPC. She is surprisingly humble in contrast to Denise's arrogant personality. Her personality is somewhat influenced by characters like Marianne from Fire Emblem: Three Houses and Yuki from Haruhi Suzumiya (though she apparently shares a name with a FE: Fates character). However, Patrice appreciates her and finds her useful. Elise is said to be exactly 1cm shorter than the rest of the maids (her home country uses metric system). Okay, slight spoiler territory: Elise takes an interest in medicine and becomes Patrice's personal physician, and towards the end of the story, researches how to be a midwife and perform an at-home delivery.

Tessa Minetti: Of the five maids, Palermo-born Tessa is the only maid that 1) did not know Patrice since childhood, and 2) her name does not rhyme with Patrice. She is the head chef of the residence; Patrice met her during a witness protection stay in Lake Como, where she worked as a chef at Villa del Balbianello. The senator loved her cooking so much, she employed the young chef in her household service. Of all the maids, Tessa is the most level-headed and a bit bookish (think Rei Tachibana from Pani Poni Dash!). She is not hyperactive, haughty, shy, or apathetic like the other four maids she works hard to keep in line. While her specialty is cooking, she can and will use utensils as weapons: her main preference being mezzaluna knives. If a bad guy were to break into the Amaretti residence, Tessa will arm herself with a pair of the curved knives and shout "It's mezzaluna time, mezza-loonies!". For some reason, I imagine her to speak like Freddi Fish.

I should also inform you that all the maids have call signs. Caprice is "Mirror" (her resemblance to Patrice), Clarice is "Sparkle" (making things clean and sparkly), Denise is "En Vogue" (personal stylist/fashion designer), Elise is "NPC" (she feels she's useless), and Tessa is "Oddball" (lack of rhyming name).

If it wasn't obvious already, I drew heavy anime inspiration for the maid squad. From wearing typical anime maid uniforms, to the hairstyles, the personalities (which occur pretty often in anime), and also incorporating one of my fave tropes...color-coded team members! Originally, I was going to put them wearing black boots for action, but since they're usually seen inside Patty's apartment, I drew them to have stockings and color-coded slippers (along with their color-coded accessories). Maybe they'll have the boots in another drawing where they're outdoors. They also have tracksuits and activewear, since they do exercise often. Also, points to anyone who caught the VeggieTales reference!

TL;DR: Caprice is Genki, Clarice is Dandere, Denise is Ojou-sama, Elise is Kuudere, and Tessa is Meganekko.

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#star wars #fanart #my art #padme amidala #handmaidens #naboo #padme's handmaidens #justice excellence defense intelligence #star wars au #clone wars au #real world au #modern au #futuristic au #maids #maid uniform #i just love how trope-y i wrote them #art #artists on tumblr #museum of stephanie

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