Tumgik
#and i was just like 'yeah i know all this shit went down but it's the only ending that makes sense bc they're miserable either way'
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A Surprise^**
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Hello friends, thank you so much for your patience. I ended up having quite a disastrous day and it took longer to finish editing! But here is the one shot based off of this request. Hope you like it!
Warnings: TW! abusive partner: mentions of love-bombing, gaslighting/accusations of infidelity, verbal arguments, intimidation tactics (psychological and physical), physical altercation between M/F ( described, but more intimidating than violent or aimed to hurt), physical altercation between M/M (not described but the aftermath is mentioned, bloody nosy type of thing), mentions of law enforcement and law enforcement processes. Mentions of sex, unprotected sex, oral (M/F receiving), fingering, unplanned pregnancy, ultrasound procedure.
WC: 18.2K
You were nervous as you rode up in the elevator. You weren’t claustrophobic or anything, so the feeling of it closing in on you was one you had no idea how to deal with. You were trying to keep your breathing as calm as possible and clearing your head of any irrational or negative thoughts, but it was truly a challenge. It had been a nearly a year since you and Harry had been in any space together and it was nerve-racking. What was originally supposed to be a month or two-long break, turned into all this time and distance. He said he wanted to talk and get some closure, which you thought was bull shit, and that’s why you were so nervous.
Before “the break” you and Harry had been dating for four years. Things had been going really well up until he started getting antsy to work again. You’d moved to London for him and now that he was finally “off” you saw that he was jumping into the next thing he could. You understood that he felt like he needed to do something with his time but soon enough he was back in the studio for hours at a time while you just hung out at his house. You lasted a year like that before you told him that you couldn’t do it anymore. You felt lonely in your relationship with him and you saw that he wasn’t ready to slow down and settle a bit like he said he was before. That was the whole reason why you’d even moved to London for him. So when you suggested a little time apart to have him sort through his priorities he freaked out on you. But the following morning the tune was different, he was more open to this idea of taking some time apart.
You had assured him over and over again that you loved him but that you were ready for the next step and he clearly wasn’t. He then assured you that you were the love of his life and that he’d take a month or two to just tie up all the loose strings with his current project and then focus back on your relationship. You even went back home to LA to give him all the space he needed. You checked in with each other a lot but when the two months were up you reached out and didn’t get a response back until two weeks later. Much to your dismay it was just an “I’m sorry.” And with tears in your eyes you just deleted the entire messaging feed you had with him.
A few months later you were back on the dating scene. One of your co-workers set you up with her cousin, Steven. He came off as sweet, smart, and mature. He mostly had his shit together from what she’d said and you had seen, so you gave him a real chance. Yeah, he was no Harry, but no one would ever equate to Harry, so you stopped comparing and got to know him for who he was. Soon enough you’d started to develop more feelings for Steven, he showered you in attention and time and affection, it was almost too much, you thought. But then you recalled that things had been so cold with Harry towards the end that maybe you just weren’t used it anymore. It wasn’t love-bombing, it was just a man who is interested in showing you what you meant to him. After two months of seeing him casually you started talking about the future, about starting a real, committed relationship. You talked about properly meeting each other’s families and taking serious steps forward, you were gearing up to properly move on with someone who clearly prioritized you! And then Harry called. 
He was jealous, you heard it in his voice when he called, but the fact that he was jealous pleased you in a way. Honestly, you thought you’d be so well off that when you spoke to him you’d feel above him somehow, but when you heard his voice your heart ached with longing and your small victory suddenly made you feel a bit sadistic. He then asked to see you to get some closure and you quickly agreed because you needed it too. But that’s how you ended up at his hotel just an hour later. So far you were just standing there at his hotel door just taking each other in. Quite frankly, you were just pleased you had made it out of the elevator alive. But it felt like it’d been ages and no time at all at the same time, your heart was racing in the confines of your chest, making it hard to breathe once again. It made you so happy, but hurt your heart at the same time to see him. It was so confusing, feeling relief and joy and disappointment all at the same time. 
“You look great.” He complimented you after a few moments of staring.
“Oh! Thanks.” You smiled timidly, “H-how are you?”
“I’m alright. Come on in.” He said moving aside and you wandered in. You sat at the couch in his suite as he headed to the kitchenette.
“Can I offer you some water or tea?” He asked.
“No, I’m alright.” You assured and he nodded before coming over to sit near you on the couch. You sat in silence for a few moments again before he chuckled in slight disbelief and shook his head.
“I can’t believe you’re actually here.” He confessed with a shake of his head.
“Me either.” You chuckled a bit humorlessly. He had wronged you…the only thing that you knew about him right now was that he did not love you as much as he said he did. If he did he wouldn’t have left you hanging like he had. “I guess I just…needed to see you one more time. I don’t think that we left off on a good note so-”
“Exactly. That’s why I wanted to see you.” He said leaning forward and taking your hand and your facade of stoicism and ease melted away immediately. The hurt from his actions just came to the surface and made a pang of pain ripple from your chest all the way out to your fingertips, you swore even your scalp hurt as his eyes met yours apologetically.
“Harry, it’s almost been a year.” You pointed out and he frowned.
“I know, love.” He confirmed, “And I haven’t even tried t-to apologize since that text I sent you.” He said and your eyes started welling up. “I’m so sorry, Y/N. I just…I got scared that if I took that step forward with you it meant that my work was gone.” He explained and you scoffed.
“Harry, no! When I asked you to slow down that’s all I meant. Slow down, not stop! I’d never tell you to stop.” You sighed, exasperated and upset that he even thought that you’d ever make him stop doing what he loved most, “I just wanted you to slow down a little and enjoy your life for yourself. Spend time with your mom and your sister and your cousins and nieces and nephews!” You vented, “W-with me.” You added towards the end and he nodded in understanding. “What you do with your work matters to me. I see how happy it makes you. And I don’t think I’ve ever done anything to make you feel like you couldn’t be honest with me about your priorities.” You said and he shook his head.
“You didn’t. I should’ve talked to you about it all, Y/N. I know I fucked up, big time, but I love you and-”
“No you don’t…” you interrupted with a scoff as you pulled your hand away from his, “You’re just jealous because I’m ready to move on with someone else now.” You said to him and he glanced up at the ceiling and smiled sadly.
“Yeah, of course I’m fucking jealous!” he confessed through a pained, breathy laugh, “And I still love you and whether you believe it or not because of my previous actions, I respect you and you deserve an apology. That’s why I wanted to see you.” He explained as his eyes met yours again, “I know that I’ve lost you, Y/N.” He said sadly, “Believe me, I didn’t come to try and talk you out of that decision. I just wanted to tell you, in person, that I love you with my whole heart. I should’ve fought for you. You showed me so much love and gave me all of your care and support all the time! I shouldn’t have been scared t-to talk about it. I shouldn’t have let you go.” He explained, “I’m going to have to live with that for the rest of my life, Y/N. I know that.” He sniffled and you wiped your tears carefully. “I just needed you to know that it’s not anything you did. I love you, even still, I think I’ll die loving you.” He said.
“Jesus, Harry…” you inhaled sharply before standing up quickly. You grabbed your purse from the coffee table and started rushing back to the door.
“Baby! Baby, baby, baby-” he rushed in front of you blocking the door, “J-just wait.” He sniffled, he looked panicked.
“Why should I?” You questioned him, “Why now?” You asked for clarity and he swallowed thickly, “You had this whole fucking time and now that I’m just about t-to forget about you, y-you show up and…” you trailed off as your anger boiled over and your tears started to trickle down your face more heavily.
“Y/N, I’m sorry-” He started.
“Y-you better not be trying to manipulate me!” You warned, your voice raised in accusation and he shook his head.
“I know it might seem that way b-but I’m not, love. I’m not looking for anything from you, I know I don’t deserve it. I just needed t-to see you and apologize to you and tell you how I feel before you wouldn’t entertain the idea of me in your presence ever again. And I know you probably hate me so much right now-” He explained and you inhaled sharply with a disappointed shake of your head.
“That’s the stupidest fucking part of this whole thing! I-” you stopped and shook your head, “I felt so happy when I heard from you.” You confessed, “And I still have so much love for you.” You sniffled and felt sick to your stomach just admitting it. You felt like an idiot for it.
You had gone over a very similar scenario in your head if not millions of times before while daydreaming or lying in bed. You dreamed of him coming back and apologizing and you having the strength to not come crawling back to him after whatever excuse he gave. Except you’d gotten it wrong. Harry wasn’t standing before you asking you to come back to him with an underlying arrogance that came with knowing that your love was enough to have you come back to him. He was actually just coming to be accountable for his mistakes and to apologize to you for hurting you. He came with humility and sincere repentance for his errors, no ulterior motives. And well, you weren’t nearly as strong as you thought you’d be by now.
“Oh, baby…” he sighed, “I don’t deserve it.” He recognized, “And I know that you’re happy.”
“I am.” You sniffled.
“I’m sorry if I made you feel confused, I really didn’t want that. I really just wanted to make things as right as I could after all this time.”
“Thank you.” You responded and he gave you one firm nod. “I think I should go.” You said and he glanced into your eyes and just waited for a moment and when you didn’t waiver he exhaled and moved out of your way to let you leave.
You reached for the door and opened it up before stepping out into the hall, pulling it shut behind you as you cried quietly as you walked back to the elevator, what seemed like a trap before now felt like your much needed escape. You were just about to step inside when you glanced back down the hallway at his door, questioning if you’d been too harsh. After all, you did miss him and you still loved him…you’d definitely regret not giving him a hug goodbye or even just confirming to him that you forgave him. So with all the strength you had, you ignored that pull to return to him and got inside and left. It was time to move on.
****************
You’d been quiet and in your head all afternoon. Internalizing everything you were feeling was weird because you were never one to just let things brew in silence. You had to talk about it and your best friend was back in the UK and she had an important work thing in the morning so you couldn’t interrupt and you just wanted to talk to someone who would be 100% real with you. You decided to just distract yourself until stopped by for dinner, surely his company would provide an adequate distraction.
But even when Steven arrived you found yourself ruminating on how awkwardly you’d left Harry. You certainly got what you needed but you were out of there so fast that you had no idea if he got the closure he needed from you and now you felt bad! That’s what you were thinking about, but your silent and pensive demeanor had Steven feeling iced out which he did not like. So after sitting in your little living room on his phone for half an hour in complete silence as his football game droned on, on the TV he figured he’d just ask you.
“Babe, are you upset at me?” He finally asked as he came into the kitchen. You were just grating some carrots into the salad you were making for dinner.
“No.” You assured him with a small smile as you glanced up at him briefly.
“Well, you’ve been oddly quiet since I got here. More than half the time I’m wishing you’d just shut up for five minutes but I don’t know anymore…it’s weird.” He joked, trying to make light of the situation. But upon hearing that your brows pinched in confusion and offense at his “joke”.
“That’s quite rude and not funny at all. I heard you turn on the game and you don’t like it when I talk to you when you’r watching so I just stayed quiet.” You mumbled a bit spitefully before going back to grating and he came closer and placed a hand on your hip.
“Damn, you’re so sensitive, it was a joke.” He said mawkishly and your irritation continued blooming so you refused to look at him, “Y/N, you’re clearly in your head about something and now you’re taking it out on me.” He said and you sighed.
“I’m not taking anything out on you, Steven. I’m just thinking some stuff through.” You shared with him.
“Stuff like…?” He pressed.
“Like…my ex, Harry.” You said and he straightened up at the mention of Harry’s name.
“Are you fucking kidding me?” He asked with a sardonic smile and you put down the carrot and glanced up at him.
“You asked.” You emphasized and he huffed out a sarcastic laugh, “I’m not done, so listen up because it’s good news for you.” You said and he clenched his jaw and nodded, “Well he’s in town and he asked to see me so we could talk,” You explained and Steven’s expression twisted into a disconcerting look, “so earlier I met up with him and we talked-”
“Wait.” He cut you off, “Why the hell would you think to go see your ex?” He asked you, fully offended over what you’d done this afternoon.
“I went to get closure! And well, considering we’ve been talking about starting a relationship in the near future it’s good for us that I just close that door for good.” You explained and he shook his head.
“And you didn’t think to tell me about this before you went there?”
“It happened so fast and I know you were meeting clients all day so I-”
“You should have at least asked if I was fine with you doing that!” He groaned with frustration and you frowned.
“Like…ask you for permission?” You asked and he shook his head.
“Don’t put words in my mouth, Y/N.” He snapped quickly.
“I’m not, I was asking for clarification. You said I should’ve asked if it was alright with you before going. Is that not asking for permission?” You asked and he sighed.
“Look, not permission but like…at least consider me! Like, have me be there so he doesn’t get any ideas.” He said and you looked at him like he was completely delusional.
“W-what?!” You asked in disbelief, “Why would I invite you into a conversation with me and my ex about our old relationship?” You questioned.
“Because, I need to make sure nothing weird is going on! And if you didn’t want me there, which you clearly didn’t, then you should’ve asked if I was cool with you going to meet him all alone! It makes me uncomfortable to think of you two alone.” He said and you were complete confused at his logic.
“And what if you said that no, I couldn’t go?” You asked.
“I would’ve said no and you would’ve not gone.” He rebutted confidently and you were in total shock, “You have no business talking to him again, Y/N.” He added and you sighed and shook your head in exasperation.
“I wanted answers and an apology, Steven. I am owed at least that! And he took responsibility. He was able to give that to me.” You said and he scoffed.
“You’re…you’re so fucking naive.” He said and you looked at him in confusion, “It’s a test. He was testing you! Testing you to see if you’re still loyal to him. Testing to see if he still has power over you! And guess what? By going there all alone the moment he called you up, you confirmed that for him. You confirmed that he still owns you!” He was speaking to you in the most belittling way. You felt your rage flaring up inside of you.
“What are you even saying?!” You scoffed in disbelief, “It was just a conversation! I was in and out of there in less than 10 minutes!” You laughed incredulously.
“10 minutes? Really? That alone fucked you up so much you couldn’t talk to me?” He asked with a sardonic look on his face and you rolled your eyes, “See now, I’m not so sure that something else didn’t happen between you two.” He soft-launched his accusation and you scoffed.
“Nothing happened! I’m telling you that he said what he needed to say and I just left!” You explained, “I’m just thinking on it because I don’t feel right about just having left like that.” You explained, “It was awkward, the way I handled it. I didn’t even ask him if he had any questions for me or anything else to say, I was selfish. I just got the apology I needed and that was that.” You said a bit sadly and his jaw clenched for a second before biting down on the inside of his cheek.
“You promise that was it?” He asked you after a few moments of silence.
“I promise! Literally we just talked.” You reiterated and he nodded.
“Fine. I’m sorry.” He said grumpily, like a child who is dying inside because they had to apologize. You imagined he was feeling a bit ashamed or even embarrassed for jumping to conclusions like that and being so off the mark. So you walked up to him and hugged him tight as you rested your head against his chest. You relaxed in his arms and smiled when you felt his hand grab your jaw and angle up your face. Your eyes met for a few tense seconds, you were preparing for him to ardently kiss you but suddenly his hand fell from your jaw and grabbed around your throat, right beneath your jaw. Your eyes widened in fear as his grip got a bit tighter by the second. His eyes were dark as he stared into yours.
“S-steven.” You gasped in concern as you started to run out of oxygen. You tried to wiggle out of his grip, eyes watery and full of fear as your nails dug into his wrist hoping to startle him out of whatever possessed him to do this.
“I don’t want you talking to or seeing him again. Never again. Do you understand me?” He demanded and you felt your entire body just turn cold. You had no idea how to even react to this change in Steven’s demeanor so you just nodded. “You’re going to be mine soon and I need to know that I can trust you fully.” He said “I want to trust you. But can I? Can I trust you to stay away from him?” he asked and you nodded again, you’d do anything to get out of this situation, “Then say it. Swear to me.” He insisted darkly as he loosened his grip around you.
“I-I’ll never talk to him or see him again.” You whispered, “I swear.” You insisted with tearful eyes and he let you go before walking out of the kitchen silently. 
You grabbed onto the counter because your legs unexpectedly lost their strength. You were panting, struggling so hard to breathe as this entire interaction processed in your brain. You suddenly felt extremely nauseated as a wave of fear overcame you. You trembled wordlessly for a bit, feeling so devastatingly mortal. You’d never had such little power. You’d never felt so small. After a short, uncomfortable, and contemplative moment you grabbed the carrot you had been working on and got back to grating. You just had to take deep breaths and grate.
You were walking on egg shells for the remainder of the night, doing anything and everything to act as normal as possible and not bait him into another aggression. Meanwhile, he was genuinely chatting with you so casually, as if he hadn’t just grabbed you by the throat like that. It terrified you that he wasn’t acting, he was genuinely fine. You were questioning yourself now, wondering if there were signs you missed? Granted, you were now getting into more serious turf, but there was nothing that you’d seen before that indicated towards him ever behaving this way. Even as you lay in bed attempting to get some rest you just stared at your ceiling thinking about that moment. How dark his eyes looked…did you need to tell someone? It’s not like he’d actually hurt you…or threatened you…he just made you promise to stay away from Harry. There wasn’t even a mark on you. Who would believe you or what could you even do about it?
He sweetened up intensely after that though and it had your mind reeling. Even when you’d had sex earlier he had been so possessive. Normally, any type of sensual talk got you going but when he told you he was “going to make you his” as he finished it didn’t have the usual or intended effect, it made you feel uneasy and made you regret having slept with him after what had happened earlier on. You immediately hopped into the shower because you just needed to wash off the memory of him of on you. You held in your tears because you thought he would join you but he just called out a goodbye after some minutes. But even in your solitude you were practically frozen and emotionless. You’d never experienced him like that and it worried you, so you decided to talk to your friend about it.
*****************
You were nervous to talk to Marie about this because she was also his cousin, but you just needed to know if there was a history to Steven that you didn’t know yet. Maybe he’d done something like this before, just got aggressive and overly possessive with another partner? Or perhaps he’d been cheated on and severely overreacted because of his past hurt? But Marie’s sort of distant demeanor should’ve tipped you off that things were not going to be good with this conversation.
“Thanks for meeting me. I actually wanted t-to talk to you about something important.” You said as soon as the waiter left after bringing your drinks. “Something that happened w-with Steven.” You said and she pulled away from her straw.
“Look, you don’t need to tell me what happened, Y/N.” She interjected, “Steven already told me.” She said flatly and for a second her anger seemed just. You were glad she was angry at him for you. “And look I love you and you’re my friend, but quite frankly, I can’t believe you’d go and hook up with Harry after how good Steven has been to you.” She said and your jaw dropped in shock.
“W-wait what?” You asked incredulously.
“Don’t do that with me, Y/N. I know how weak you are for Harry.” She said and you shook your head, “I mean…I did warn Steven early on t-to be careful and take his time with you because you’d probably cave and run back to Harry.” She said and you frowned, “But after all this time? I mean Jesus, Y/N! The man pretended like you didn’t exist for almost a year! How little self respect do you have t-to allow him back in after everything?!” She questioned you with disappointment and a harsh judgement.
“Is that really what you think of me?” You asked her and she sighed.
“Look, I’m sorry for being so harsh but I love you and I’m angry at you for cheating on my cousin. He’s a good guy!” She defended her stance and you shook your head.
“I didn’t cheat on your cousin. We’re not even in an official or exclusive relationship so even if I had fooled around with Harry he has nothing to be upset over! He’s the one who hasn’t wanted to be exclusive yet!” You corrected and Marie smiled incredulously down at her drink, “You don’t have to believe me about Harry if you don’t want but believe this, Steven? He’s not a good guy.” You said and she looked up at you again fully offended.
“Y/N, look-”
“No, listen to me. I just need you t-to hear me out. Last night he…h-he grabbed me really hard by the throat and made me swear I would never talk to or see Harry again. He terrified me.” You confessed and her eyes didn’t even soften up, “I came t-to ask if maybe I’d struck a nerve by mistake, looking to justify how he behaved towards me but the fact that he got to you first and lied about what happened…that just confirmed to me that I want nothing to do with him. He’s a ticking time bomb and I refuse to be collateral damage.” You said as you stood from your seat.
“How dare you.” She said and stood as well and you shook your head. “You can’t just go around throwing accusations about someone like that! Especially about this sort of thing! It could ruin him, Y/N!” She said with a quiet and calculated rage.
“Believe what you want, but I want nothing to do with either of you ever again.” You said to her and walked off. When you sat in your car you were trembling with rage, you could not believe the last 24 hours of your life. You were just collecting yourself before taking off, you didn’t want to get on the road with that much anger flowing through your veins. You jumped in surprise when your phone started ringing loudly from your purse and you groaned and reached for it and when you saw Harry’s name on the screen you just felt a wave of comfort and then it turned into fear. You knew Steven wasn’t here but you couldn’t help but glance around your immediate surroundings before answering the call.
“Hello?” You spoke into the receiver tentatively.
“Y/N, I ummm, I need you to come down to my hotel right away if you can.” He said to you and you felt your stomach drop.
“W-why?” You asked him nervously.
“Your boyfriend broke into my suite and tried to attack me.” He said and you gasped. “Are you alright?” You asked instantly.
“Yeah, thankfully. But now h-he’s telling the officers that you put him up to this.” He said lowly, “Just come and we’ll sort this out.” He assured.
“Okay, I’ll be there soon.” You said and took off despite your heightened emotions.
Just before you arrived to Harry’s suite you saw a pair of officers guide Steven away down the hall in hand cuffs. He had a bandage over his nose and a busted lip. He barely held eye contact with you as they pulled him along. You rushed down the hall and hurried into the open suite more than relieved to see a paramedic only icing Harry’s hand while he talked to one of the officers looming over him.
“Oh my god, I’m glad you’re okay!” You exclaimed in relief and he stood right away and hugged you tight as you leaned into him and that’s when all of your emotions from even the night before caught up with you and you started to cry. 
“Hey, hey, hey, it’s alright. I’m alright.” He assured you lowly.
“Yeah, but sometimes you minimize things to not worry anyone so…” you reminded and he chuckled a little as you pulled back, “I’m so sorry about this, H. Sincerely. Genuinely! I-I can’t believe he went as far as pulling something like this.” You expressed, still quite flabbergasted at what had gone down. Harry rubbed over your back in comforting circles.
“It’s alright. I’m alright.” He assured you, “He’s worse off than I am.” He smirked a bit as he delivered this news.
“Oh, I saw.” You chuckled through your tears and he hummed. “You’re not gonna get into any trouble, are you?” You asked.
“No, love.” He assured you, “I acted in self-defense so we’re all clear there. He did give me a good scare though.” He said more seriously and you sighed. 
“This never should have happened…I just don’t get it where this came from? I swear, this is not at all like him! I’ve never seen him behave this way in the couple months we’ve been seeing each other. Even last night was just so out of character for how he’s always been towards me! And I’m not trying to make excuses for him. Clearly this is fucked-”
“Wait. What happened last night?” Harry asked you more seriously and you sighed and shook your head.
“Nothing, really.” You said to him and he gave you a look, not a scary one, just an insistent one. You sighed and shrugged, “Last night when I…when I told him we met up to talk and get closure he got really angry at me. Like, he was livid. It was truly an overreaction to me mentioning that I was really happy over having received that apology from you but that I felt like I had been awkward about it and left it weird with us.” You explained, “Then, he asked why I didn’t ask for permission t-to talk to you or see you or why I didn’t ask him to come with me? And I explained that I agreed to meet with you so that we could clear the air so that I could move on with him in peace and he accused me of fooling around with you.” You explained monotonously as you felt like you were there all over again, “I assured him we just talked and he then pretended like it was fine and apologized half-heartedly… and I went in to hug him but then it’s like a switch flipped.” You recounted what had happened, “I thought he was going t-to kiss me but he…” your voice faded out into an exhale, “H-he grabbed me so hard by the throat and made me swear that I wouldn’t see o-or talk to you ever again-”
“Miss?” One of the officers interrupted and you turned towards the officer as Harry released you just a bit. 
“Yes?” You asked softly.
“Can you elaborate more on this altercation?” He asked and you swallowed thickly.
“I don’t want to get anyone in trouble.” You said softly, eyes now laser focused on Harry’s dangling pendant as your vision started to blur with more building tears. You were scared more than worried about getting Steven into any more trouble and Harry could see that. “Love, look at me.” Harry insisted and you blinked rapidly as one of your tears trickled down your cheek before you looked up at him, “If he did anything to scare you, you need to report it.” He said, “He’s fucked as it is for this, he can’t do anything to you ever again. He won’t.” Harry assured you and you nodded.
You proceeded to explain what had happened and how he had grabbed you. You explained that you felt intimidated and frozen and unsure of what to do next after the altercation. You were asked why you didn’t call the police or make a report and you explained that you didn’t think there was anything to report. He hadn’t technically hit you or injured you. You had no visible marks on you or anything to prove this apart from the fear you’d been harboring ever since. But the officer informed you that even a forceful grab is considered assault in the sate of California. And that speaking to you that way, exerting any tactics to make you feel subdued or intimidated were also considered acts of aggression and intimidation that were reportable offenses. And after a few more questions and you assuring them that he had never done anything like this to you before they moved back to the situation with Harry. With police reports filed they went on their way and you offered to get Harry a new place to spend the rest of his trip.
**************
It was just a few hours later and you were sitting in your living room waiting for Harry to come out of the shower and for his lawyer to arrive. You felt awful for this whole thing with Steven, you really had no idea he was a psycho like this. Marie had actually tried calling you almost 20 times and had sent you about 15 texts asking you to call back and that she was sorry for not believing you earlier. You were still too angry at her to respond so you put your phone on “Do Not Disturb” and just focused on the TV and wondered if it was a good idea to have brought Harry to your home. You had found another place for him to stay but before you booked it he asked if it would be alright to use your guest room because he was concerned for your safety since Steven knew where you lived. 
His concerns were valid. And you knew that Steven was well connected and had several lawyer friends who you were sure could get him out on bail by the morning, so you agreed to let him stay. You just didn’t want to also put Harry in harm’s way again. You would never forgive yourself if Steven did anything to hurt him. All in all, none of this felt real, you felt like you were in an unhinged daytime soap episode just waiting for another tragedy to befall you and those in your life. You were so on edge that you flinched in fright when the doorbell rang. Once the shiver passed through your body you hurried over to see through the peephole and saw Harry’s lawyer waiting there.
“Hi Darius.” You greeted him with a smile and he smiled back upon seeing you as well. It’d been quite a while.
“Y/N! Wow!” He chuckled, “It’s so great to see you!” He greeted you happily as you led him inside.
“Likewise! I think Harry’s just finishing up his shower, he had quite the day.” You said as you locked up behind him and he sighed.
“Yeah. I’m so sorry to hear about that. But I’m glad he’s safe and that you’re also safe.” He assured you and you thanked him before guiding him over to the kitchen and allowing him to get set up while you went to grab the Coca-cola he’d requested. 
It was just a couple of minutes before Harry joined you two and caught up a bit with Darius before he got into the story of what happened. Harry was going to follow through on pressing charges and he was even more motivated to get it all done ASAP when he heard what Steven had done to you the night before. He wanted to give Darius his statement as well while it was fresh in his memory so that it matched up perfectly to what he’d told the police and so he started answering the questions while Darius recorded and took notes as well. But hearing it in detail for yourself made it all the more sinister for you. You weren’t even thinking about it all that deeply when you reached for Harry’s hand under the table and he paused and briefly looked at you.
“Sorry.” You mouthed and started to pull it away from him but he instead tangled your fingers together and kept talking.
You stayed at his side for the rest of the time until Darius left, assuring you both that he’d let you know as soon as any headway was made in this case. With a final farewell you were locking up behind him as Harry waited for you just a small distance away. You sighed and turned to him.
“I’m so, so sorry about this, Harry. If I had know that he would do something like this… I mean, I just shouldn’t have said anything to him about you or-”
“Hey, it’s not your fault. How were you supposed to know, love?” He asked as he grabbed your face gently, right under your jaw and you swallowed thickly and he quickly slid his hands down to your shoulders. “Shit, I’m sorry. I forgot.” He said and you shook your head.
“It’s alright. It’s still fresh.” You reminded and he sighed and shook his head.
“I’m sorry…if I had just come back to you when I was supposed to we wouldn’t be in this mess.” He said and you sighed.
“You weren’t happy though, I mean…you preferred to be alone all this time instead of back with me so…it was the right thing for you at the time.” You said to him.
“You forgive me though, right? For not…” he trailed off and you nodded.
“Yeah, H.” You assured him and he pecked your lips quickly.
“Thank you.” He said quietly.
“Of course.” You whispered back. Your lips still tingling from his quick kiss. 
“Sorry, I just needed to kiss you.” He said and you smiled slightly.
“I get it.” You assured him. “D-do you want to…sleep with me?” You asked with a little bit of hesitation.
“Yeah, love.” He said without a hint of a doubt, “Of course. I’m a bit shaken up myself.” He said and you nodded.
“C’mon then.” You said and grabbed his hand and guided him to your bedroom. You guys washed up and then cuddled into your bed. 
You faced each other silently, just looking at each other, taking each other in. You were telling each other you had missed each other with your shared, longing gaze, but you refused to touch. You both loved the static and electric feeling buzzing between your bodies far too much. It was masochism in its purest form. It hurt to be apart, you missed his vibe. His energy. His presence…Harry was a warm, little ball of light, even on his dark days. He was the kindest, most thoughtful person you’d been is fortunate to encounter. He was so hard on himself also, and you knew he was angry at himself right now. You didn’t want him to be though, you wanted him to be here with you and enjoying this reunion, however unfortunate the situation was that led to it. 
The amount of love you felt for him was impossible. As you laid in silence you smiled because you had truly missed the sound of his breathing. You inhaled his exhales, feeling more than grateful to be within his reach. You wanted to feel him on you, skin to skin. You shivered as you felt this intense love just surge through you.
“Harry?”
“Yeah?”
“I love you.” You said softly and sincerely. His eyes glanced down, averting from your gaze as he smiled in disbelief. “I mean it.” 
“Even after all this time?” He asked, “After everything I’ve done?”
“I didn’t say I wasn’t hurt by you.” You smiled and he chuckled, “But yeah, I still love you despite those things.”
“Enough to give me another chance?” He asked.
“I…I mean, yeah.” You chuckled nervously. “And I don’t know i-if I’m a complete fool for that?! But I’ve missed you.”
“I’ve missed you too, baby. More so lately…” he said and you hummed.
“Why’s that?” You asked.
“Umm…I was cleaning out your side of things. Like to send ‘em back to you and I just…I found this little box in the corner on your side of the closet-”
“The memory box!” You exclaimed, remembering its existence.
“Yeah…I just got to see all of the wonderful things we’ve shared together. How you’ve been there for absolutely everything. You’ve never let me down.” He said softly, “And I just…felt like a total fool for dismissing that. Nothing feels the same without you, you’re the thing that just…tied everything together, you know? You made my heart feel…whole.” He explained, “When I say that I miss you that’s what I mean. I’ve been incomplete without you around, Y/N. I’ve been missing you from everything. I’m so sorry that I waited until I almost lost you to reach out to you…” he whispered with shame. You frowned and reached for his cheek
“Everything happens for a reason, honey.” You whispered, “I mean, I’m glad you came along at this time because you saved me from a potentially dangerous situation.” You said more solemnly.
“I’m glad I was here for this. May-maybe this is a…sign of sorts for you to come back home with me.” He said a bit carefully. 
Harry was nervous to bring this up to you but he really just didn’t want you staying anywhere near this man. He wanted to be certain that he could keep you safe, that he could protect you and ensure that you were never so easily in harm’s way again.  And on top of that, his love for you continued simmering lowly in the background, it had never gone out. He just fled out of fear and he regretted it so much. He had been selfish and didn’t realize it until far too late. It filled him with gratitude that you’d even hear him out for an apology, let alone give him another chance. A chance that he may have blown with this suggestion he’d just put out there.
“Ummm…I…I’m not sure w-what to say to that.” You responded honestly, “Like, my first instinct is to say yes.” You chuckled nervously and while he was relieved to hear that, he held off his excitement to hear what would come next, “But like you’ve acknowledged a couple times already, we’ve been apart for a while and I think we both hurt each other to some extent and I worry that…in jumping right back into where we left things off that we’ll forget about all of the issues that led to us breaking down instead of working through them.” You said and he hummed.
“Yeah, that’s extremely valid.” He responded, “And I guess I want this right now mainly because I don’t want you here all alone.” He explained, “I realize we have things to work through before we can get to where we were before all this. And I’m so willing to put in the work with you to get to that stage again. But right now I just want to ensure that you’re safe and far away from that prick, Steven. That’s my main concern as of now, baby.”
“Well thank you for worrying about me. I would love to leave with you but I don’t think it’d be a smart move.” You sighed.
“Even just for a few weeks until things cool off a bit? I can set you up somewhere else even.” He said and you bit your lip pensively.
“I’ll think about it.” You responded.
“Okay, that’s…that’s enough for me.” He whispered back.
***********************
It  was a couple weeks later when Steven finally showed up at your place. Obviously you had the locks changed, so his key didn’t work, which really angered him. And when you heard him shouting at you and pounding on the door, threatening to break in if you didn’t allow him in, you immediately called the cops as you had a restraining order filed against him. You also recorded everything this time as you tried to calmly coax him into leaving before they showed up. He was angry that Harry was pressing charges against him and he wanted you to talk him out of it. You knew better than to say anything about Harry’s case, so instead you asked Steven how he even got access to Harry’s location. Up until this point it was all speculation, you just assumed he grabbed the information off of your phone, that really was the only way. But there was no proof yet that this was a premeditated aggression on Steven’s end. So when he confessed to you that he searched for the information on your phone you were relieved and would submit that as further evidence to get a more strict order against him.
He refused to leave and the longer you didn’t let him in the angrier he got and even broke a window. Thankfully, the police were just arriving when this happened and they submitted an Emergency Protective Order, this was far more strict than the restraining order but that was really all they could do. You really didn’t feel safe anymore so the next morning you contacted your landlord and explained to her what had happened and let her know that you’d have to terminate your lease early for your safety. She was kind and didn’t make you pay the extra fee or even make you finish out a whole month, she just hoped you’d fine somewhere else soon. 
You contacted Harry and of course, he said you could stay with him for a little bit. You felt stupid for not just doing that to begin with like he had suggested. But the reality was that he had also hurt you and let you down and you were worried about what moving in together again so soon would do to impact your future. But for the time being this felt like the safest choice. Steven knew your friends and co-workers in the area thanks to Marie, so there was no one you could go to in LA that you felt he wouldn’t think of. It pained you to quit your job and pack up your life and go, but you needed to. Of course, Harry welcomed you with open arms and you were grateful to know that you were a whole continent and ocean away from LA right now. 
*****************
It had been three weeks of you living with Harry and things had been going well so far. You felt drained though, like completely fatigued from everything, you often felt this way when you were anxious or depressed so you prioritized reconnecting with your therapist from before right away. You were seeing her every week so far and were eager to see and feel the results of doing this deep and healing work after what had happened to you and Harry in LA. You also reconnected with a few friends and they were helping you network a bit to find a job. Harry assured you that he was more than capable to take care of you but you didn’t feel comfortable with that, especially since your romantic future together was still a bit up in the air.
You two were doing well, you were reconnecting as friends more than anything right now. Living with him was comfortable though, you had lived together before though, so you knew how to exist in the same space together. You soon noticed that just being in a situation that was familiar to you both was making you both more affectionate towards each other though, which you both had been working hard to keep at bay. Of course, the feelings were there, but having those little things that reminded you, you weren’t alone made you smile, like now…
“Baby, I’m home! Are you here?” Harry called as he came into the house.
“Yeah, I’m in the laundry room!” You called back over the rumble of the washing machine as you folded your laundry. Moments later he was coming into the small, warm room with a smile on his face.
“Hi, love! How was it today?” He asked as he came up to you and hugged you.
“It was good. I met with Poppy and her friend, Sheila, she’s the one who just started up her own tanner line or something and needs an accountant? She’s interested, so I’m meeting with her and her partner again her next week when she’s back from her vacation to see about the position.” You shared.
“That’s really good. Hopefully it pans out.”
“I hope so too.” You said as you dropped the t-shirt you were working on in the basket with folded laundry so that you could interlace your fingers as you clung to him.
“And like I said before though, no rush, okay? You’re doing plenty to help out here. And after everything else you’ve been through, taking it slow can’t hurt.” He added.
“Thank you. I really do appreciate that, H.” You smiled.
“Of course, love.” He hummed. You pulled back slowly and looked into each other’s eyes. “I’m really happy you’re here.” He reassured you.
“Thank you, baby.” You whispered.
“Baby?” He asked with a grin and you rolled your eyes and sighed.
“Well, I mean…you call me that, so…”
“It feels right, doesn’t it?”
“Yeah.” You agreed with a smile.
“I love you.”
“I love you too.” You whispered with a smile. He tucked your hair behind your ear and kissed your cheek.
“Can I kiss your for real?” He asked you quietly and you just nodded. Moments later your lips met in a tentative kiss. There was a little bit of hesitation at first but seconds later you were kissing with more depth. Your hands held his as he cupped your face tenderly as you continued to kiss. You’d kissed very quickly a handful of times since your arrival but nothing like this where you could feel yourself getting all hot and bothered by it.
“Baby…” you mumbled into the kiss.
“Right…sorry.” He hummed and let you go breaking the kiss abruptly and you chuckled as you blindly reached down your leg and finally grabbed the dryer sheet that was half hanging out of the dryer and tickling your leg. You crumbled it up and tossed it in the garbage bin just a few feel away from you before turning back and looking up to him.
“You can continue now.” You said with a small smile and he grinned before picking you up and setting you on the dryer as your mouths met with more urgency. Your kiss and need started to grow and grow and boil over very quickly.
It really wasn’t planned when he carried you to his room and got you undressed. Even though you’d yet to resolve everything from before, you didn’t feel worried or wrong about this. You felt comfortable and beautiful as you felt his bare skin against your own. You were eagerly awaiting it as he kissed down your body and made you feel so good along the way. He wasted no time in getting down and going down on you, showing you just how much he had missed you. He savored you and gave you his best until you were starting to lose your grip on reality.
“Oh fuck, I missed you…” you giggled through a moan as his tongue did it’s wonderful work between your legs. You were tingling all over as he flicked over your clit until you were trembling and then he started to suck, “Oh my god!” You gasped as your eyes started to roll back. “I’m getting so close!” You warned. 
Your lips parted and you started to pant when he started to work two fingers into you. Your breath hitched when he curved them up into your g-spot. You felt your body melt into the bed for a second before he started to fuck into you harden until you were so tense your legs trembled as you started to come. The soft moans flowing from your lips were egging Harry on, making him even more hungry for you. You pulled him back up to you and your lips met eagerly as you reached for the button of his jeans.
“Want ‘em off?” He asked and you nodded, “Sure, baby?” He asked and you nodded.
“Yeah, baby. I want you. I need you.” You whispered and he smiled before kissing your lips quickly before pulling back a bit.
“I just…I need you to know that if we do this I want us t-to be the thing that means we’re going to try again.” He said and your gaze softened, “Obviously, I’ve missed your body and having you like this, but this is more than that to me. I want it to  be more than that.” He said and you nodded.
“I do too, baby. I want to try again. I really do.” You said to him with welled up eyes and he smiled and kissed you slowly again.
“You are everything to me.” He mumbled as you helped get his pants off blindly as he tugged the material down, “I’m never going to forget that again. I swear it, baby. You make me so fucking happy.” He panted as he toed off the pants before he climbed over you and pulled you up with him towards the the top of the bed. You climbed over his lap and kissed his passionately. Harry’s hands roamed your naked body with expertise. He knew the spots to touch and to pay mind to as you guys worked up to the love-making bit. You too appreciated his body. You touched and kissed over his body and took his length into your mouth, working him up just a bit more before you two had sex. 
“Shit, baby…fuck that’s so good!” He groaned as you sunk down on him until you gagged around his tip. You weren’t as used to his size as you once were. 
“Careful, baby. Go easy.” He reminded as he stroked over your cheek lovingly before running his thumb along your stretched out bottom lip. He loved seeing how you fit him in your hot little mouth. It had his abs clenching hard as you rolled and fondled his heavy balls in your hands until he was fighting the urge to start thrusting in your mouth. “Baby, please…please, I need you.” He panted and you popped off of him and glanced up at him.
“Can I get on?” You asked and he swallowed thickly.
“A-are you sure you want this?” He asked and you nodded.
“I do, H. I want this with you. I want everything with you. Everything that we had, I want it all back. I love you more than anything in the wor-” he cut you off with his kiss and laid you down. You were dying of impatience as hi heavy erection glided against your slicked up and swollen folds, you were so ready to have him back.
“I love you. I love you so much.” He whispered as he lined up to your entrance.
“I love you too. Please just…I need you.” You begged and so he pushed forward until he was sinking deep in your hot, wet little hole until he bottomed out. 
You hissed as you adjusted back to his size, he was great about it, so patient and eager to get you going by rubbing over your clit until you were so wet you were sliding up and down his shaft. He watched you hungrily as you lifted your hips up and down to feel him moving inside of you. But it got to the point where he needed to take over and just get you both to come. His thrusts were deep and slow, he was bottoming out with each one, it was making your brain blank each and every time he sunk into the deepest part of you. Your body was tingling and your walls fluttering and pulsing around him with every movement. Everything felt so good with him. He was looking down at you with so much adoration it was making you even more emotional.
“Baby, baby don’t cry.” He chuckled as he kissed your forehead as a few tears streamed down your cheek.
“It just feels so…good.” You sniffled and he kissed you quickly, “It feels so good to be with you.” You hummed as you rolled your hips up against his and he moaned lowly and kissed you again.
“Yeah? Are you gonna come for me?” He asked and you nodded. “Good girl, let me know when you’re getting close.”
“I will.” You whined out as he delved deep and ground against you until your eyes squeezed shut, “Shit!” You gasped as he started thrusting a bit faster into that spot until you just felt yourself leaking around.
“Fuck…” he laughed, “Fuck, you’re so wet f’me, I-I’m getting close.” He panted and you whined and started to rub your clit to catch up to him.
In a few moments you were right there on the edge with him. Your back was arching as you moaned his name as your orgasm nearly took you out. Your ears were ringing and your vision was blurring as you started to come around him. He started to thrust faster to get off, but he was drawing out your orgasm until you were trembling.
“Fuck…fuck, I’m coming!” He warned as he started to press himself up to pull out. “Oh fuuuuck…” he moaned as he started to stroke himself as he came all over your mound. He thrusted his sensitive cock through your folds, making a little mess of you before kissing you ardently. “I love you. Love you so fucking much.” He whispered, his voice cracked as he started to cry and you pulled him into your chest and held him tight as you both just let your raw emotions out in this moment. 
You both needed it desperately. After he settled down he hurried to get something to clean you off and then you started to talk about you two. What you wanted, what you hoped to see in the future. You’d had these conversations before but even now the things that Harry was saying to you were complete different than before. Losing you seemed to be the thing that woke him up to how much he’d been taking you for granted. He’d gotten used to it, he’d gotten complacent at your expense.
“It’s going to be so different this time.” He said softly as he looked deep in your eyes, “I will be different this time.” He assured and you sighed.
“I believe you…there’s just a little part of me that is still not ready to let you back in.” You explained after he had explained how he was going to show up for you from now on, “I want to just trust you fully, but I’m afraid that you’ll make a fool of me again. That you’ll hurt me again.” You explained, “And I know y-you won’t but I just need to let you know that I’m still learning to trust you fully again.” You explained. “So please just…be a little patient with me.” You requested and he smiled.
“I know, baby. I will be patient with you and I will do everything I can to prove to you that I will never do anything to make you doubt choosing me again.” He said and kissed you slowly. You smiled into the kiss and let him pull you closer to him again and that’s how you fell asleep, nestled close together.
….. ONE MONTH LATER ….
In this short amount of time things had drastically shifted between you and Harry. You’d started to go on a date a week, doing thoughtful things for each other, sharing your feelings as they arose, communicated openly…he’d matured a lot in your time apart and helped you overcome your fears faster than you anticipated. You were so proud of him and it was spilling over into every moment. Like now, you were filled with a surge of love as you wandered into the kitchen to see him pulling out your favorite salad dressing from the fridge.
“Hiya, baby. What’re you up to?” You asked.
“Just making us your favorite salad for a light lunch.” He said.
“Wow, lunch already?” you asked and he smiled as you went over to him and hugged him from the back as you peeked over to his hands, eager to direct him on how much dressing he needed to add.
“Yeah, love!” He chuckled, “We had breakfast at 8! It’s already past 2pm.” He informed you and that surprised you. But you’d been so sucked into your work that it was very possible that you forgot to even feel hungry.
“Oh, I didn’t realize.” You explained and he frowned a bit.
“Baby, have you been feeling alright? It’s not just today, I’ve noticed that you haven’t had much of an appetite at all lately.” He pointed out and you frowned as you gave it some thought and realized that yeah, this was something you’d been feeling for at least two weeks. Maybe it was intense PMS? You hadn’t gotten your period since moving here, so you hoped it was just your body finally catching up with itself.
“You’re right…I mean, I have very visceral reactions to stress and big changes…I mean, my whole body and system have just been out of whack for a little but they’ll balance out again.” You assured him and he hummed.
“That’s true, it’s been hectic for you.” He said as he opened up the dressing bottle, “Honestly, I was thinking that-” he stopped as you gagged as the scent of the dressing wafting up towards you. You had to let him go and go hunch yourself over the sink as you felt the scent of the dressing just linger in your nose and mouth. “Baby…?” Harry came over and rubbed your back slowly, “Are you alright?”
“Yeah…” you grimaced, “But I think the dressing is bad. Didn’t you smell that? It was rank!” You turned to him with a disgusted look on your face and he frowned.
“I didn’t smell anything. You look a bit awful now though. You’re all pale.” He said feeling your forehead and you exhaled slowly to ward off the nausea that you suddenly felt making your head spin.
“I might throw up, the dressing smells so bad.” You explained and he frowned and turned to the counter and brought it up to his nose and it smelled just fine to him. He even checked the bottle for the usage date and it was still good. 
“This is fine…should I mix your salad with something else then?” He asked and you shook your head.
“I think I’m fine. I’ll just have some toast.” You said and he nodded. Eventually, you had to go back to your “office” and leave him hanging for lunch because you could not handle the look and scent of the salad, especially that dressing. By the time dinner rolled around you were still feeling a little off so you just had some veggies in a chicken broth and that was that.
*******************
You’d truly forgotten about your sensitive sense of smell until once again, you were assailed by an unbearable scent. Except this time it had happened at your friend, Poppy’s house. And this time you did actually get sick.
“God, I’m so sorry, P.” You apologized as you returned to her kitchen with embarrassment, “I swear its not your cooking, my nose has just been so sensitive lately and I get to grossed out by certain scents. I’m not sure what exactly yet though.” You explained to her.
“God, you sound like my sister when she got pregnant.” Poppy chuckled and you froze. That hadn’t even crossed your mind. Yeah, you’d missed your period for the last two months but literally everything impacted your period, your cycle was fickle, especially when you were under as much stress as you’d been. You weren’t surprised that it hadn’t come at all. Truly, this wasn’t new to you, especially when you were stressed out, regardless of whether or not you were on the pill (which you weren’t after moving back here, you’d run out the week before you came out). Then, you recalled that when you and Harry had sex the first time he hadn’t used a condom. Yeah, he’d pulled out but that was never a guarantee.
“Hey, what’s wrong?” Poppy asked you with concern.
“I think I should probably take a test just to rule that out. I mean, it’s…very unlikely but I was a bit irresponsible a bit ago and just need some peace of mind.” You said.
“Okay, I have some in my bathroom, let me get you one.” She offered and you nodded so she hurried off to get it for you.
You were sure you were good, but you just needed to see it for yourself. There was absolutely no way you could be pregnant, you weren’t ready for that. Harry wasn’t ready for that. Like emotionally you guys were, but you had just rekindled your relationship, the last thing you needed was something this crazy to throw a wrench in things so quickly after you’d gotten back together.
“Alright, here you are, babe.” She said handing over the box as she came up to you again.
“Thanks.” You smiled nervously.
“W-would you mind if I did it here?” You asked her and she smiled and shook her head.
“Of course not.” She assured you and with that you were off to the bathroom again, sitting there, willing yourself to pee enough to saturate the stick and finally it came and you put the cap back on it and washed your hands before coming out. “I hate to be that person but what if you are pregnant?” She asked and you sighed.
“I have no idea…” you confessed through a nervous chuckle while you stared at the wall blankly, “I mean, H and I just…God, we’re just getting back into the groove of things. Throwing a baby into the mix at this time isn’t going to make anything easier. It’s just not what we need right now.” You explained to her.
“Yeah, I get that.” She chuckled, “Cam and I try and then we stop because of the same thing and like…ugh, it’s just a vicious cycle! And genuinely, if you have that many doubts it’s just that you’re not prepared for it, you know? That’s what I had to tell Cam after a few months.” She explained and you nodded in understanding. “I-if you are…what do you think Harry’d say?” She asked and you sighed.
“I have no fucking clue…” you admitted, “Obviously, before, we had said we wanted to have a family together. But again, that was before everything went to shit with us.” You sighed, “And like, we’re in such a good place right now…” you sighed, “Like I know he wouldn’t be a prick about it but we’re not quite ready for that yet.” You chuckled nervously and Poppy nodded in understanding.
“Well, don’t worry, you’ll see in a few minutes that everything is fine.” She smiled with encouragement. 
You decided to believe her that everything was going to be fine. You were already booked for a full body, deep tissue massage next week with Poppy when your timer went off. You turned off the timer and then brought the test up closer and your heart stopped beating and you stopped breathing for what felt like an eternity. Staring right back at you, clear as day, were two little pink lines.
“Th-that means I’m…right?” You asked showing Poppy and she bit her lip nervously and nodded.
“Are you okay?” She asked you with concern and you just exhaled slowly. You were completely taken by surprise. Then you started to get worried.
“I ummm…I think I need to get home.” You said to her, still in shock. You swallowed thickly as you tried to imagine how Harry would react to the news that he would be a father.
“Do you want me to drive you over?” She offered, since you had walked from Harry’s to hers. It was just a 20 minute walk, you guys lived quite close.
“No, no, P, it’s alright. I think walking will be good for me, I need to…I need…” you trailed off as your eyes started to well up with tears as you started to imagine the worst case scenario.
“Hey…Hey, hey, hey, c’mere.” She said pulling you into her arms as you started to cry, “It’s going to be alright, babe. H is not gonna be angry, you know that.” She assured you as she rubbed comforting circles into your back as you held her tight. “You have options, yeah? You know that he’ll have your back no matter what.” She said and you nodded, “Let me get you home, yeah?”
“Okay.” You whispered to your best friend and she gave you one more squeeze before letting you go.
  Once you got to your place she encouraged you to have a shower and that she’d get some tea going for you. You texted Harry that you needed him to come home as soon as possible, you didn’t want this solely on your chest for another minute. You took your time and when Harry started pulling into your driveway Poppy popped in and let you know before shouting a goodbye to you. You sighed and relished in the warm water for just another moment before turning off the water. You were soon reaching for your robe and slipping into it. You padded over to the mirror to wash your face and you bit your lip before untying the robe and looking over your body. You looked the same, you saw no evidence of a baby.
“Baby?” You heard Harry calling from downstairs. Soon, his footsteps were heard coming up the stairs and you quickly tied your robe up and got to lathering your face wash in your hands.
“In the bathroom!” You called back before rubbing it into your skin. He rushed into the bathroom and looked more than relieved to see you intact.
“Are you alright?” He asked and you sighed and quickly bent over to rinse your face. You then dabbed it dry as you reached for your toner.
“I think so…” you responded after a little bit, “I don’t know.” You sighed as you grabbed your moisturizer.
“Well what’s going on? Hmmm?” He asked you as he came over and kissed your shoulder, his arms wrapped around your middled and pulled you in closer and suddenly you had to throw up again. You gasped and wriggled out of his hold and turned around to face him. Your eyes started welling up with tears again and you were just building up the courage to say it. “Baby, you’re worrying me.” He said softly and you swallowed thickly.
“Ummm…I…I’m pregnant.” You said and his jaw slightly dropped. He let out a small and nervous laugh before he just pulled you back into his arms without a single word. You hugged him back and just held each other for a little bit.
“What do you want to do?” He finally asked you and you shook your head.
“I have no fucking clue…” you said and he let you go and hoisted you up onto the counter. You draped your arms over his shoulders as he held your thighs, “I mean, what do you think?” You asked and he sighed.
“I don’t fucking know…I mean, that’s gonna be our baby so I…like I’m inclined t-to give it a try. But at the same time I don’t know that our relationship is ready for something like this. I mean, I want this with you in a few years but we’re just getting started again.”
“I know…I don’t even know how this…like you pulled out.”
“I know, but it’s not always a guaranteed thing.” He said and you sighed.
“I should’ve said something then…” you shook your head as you rubbed your forehead with one of your hands.
“Hey, there’s no point for any would’ve-should’ve-s,” he said, “It’s gonna be alright. We’ll figure it out soon, okay?” You nodded, “Just take your time, baby. Whatever you decide, I have your back.” He assured you and you nodded. He grabbed your face and kissed your lips until you were smiling.
“Stoooop.” You giggled, “M’not in the mood.” You pouted through your smile and he smiled.
“I think you’re lying.” He hummed and you rolled your eyes. “Look, how about we get an appointment with the doctor and see how far along you are and maybe that’ll help us decide what we might want to do.” He said and you nodded.
“Yes, good thinking.” You smiled, “God, I was so scared to tell you.” You sighed and he tutted.
“What made you think to take a test?”
“I smelled something P was cooking and got sick.” You said, you felt tour cheeks growing hot in embarrassment. Harry chuckled and then furrowed his brows pensively. 
“Didn’t you almost get sick at the salad dressing a bit ago?” He recalled and you chuckled.
“Yeah, that’s true…” you remembered, “I mean, I know I haven’t gotten my period but-”
“How was that not a sign?!” He chuckled in disbelief and you proceeded to explain how your period often skipped when you were under a lot of stress so this wasn’t an odd thing for you. But he was sweet, he was calm, but you could see the cogs just turning at full speed in his mind. You hoped he wasn’t angry at you, but you couldn’t help but think that he was and that he would run again. “I’m not angry, you know?” He mumbled softly and you glanced into his eyes and smiled a bit, “I can see it in your eyes, you know?” He whispered.
“You sure?”
“I am, baby. But I am…excited too…I mean, I don’t want to dwell on it too much incase we decide not to proceed with this but…I am. I mean, you’re the only person I want to have a life with. No matter how it happens, it’s you that I want to have babies with and raise them with and just share that experience with. So if you did want to continue with the pregnancy that would be good with me too.” He hummed.
“Okay. Thank you for your opinion.” You whispered before kissing his lips and hugging him tight against. You kissed at his neck as you just nestled yourself in the crook of it. “I love you.”
“I love you.” He smiled.
…. TWO DAYS LATER ….
You currently found your self peeing into a cup at the doctor’s office. You knew you were pregnant, but the doctor wanted to verify before they did an ultrasound to see where you were at. Once you finished you closed up the little jar and left it not he shelf as instructed. You washed your hands and then scurried across the hall and back into your room to see Harry intently reading the poster on the wall abut pregnancy.
“You know you get super horny during the second trimester.” He said in amusement, “As if you needed any more of that while pregnant…greedy.” He mumbled with a grin and you chuckled.
“You’re dumb.” You said as you went back over to the bench and sat again. You dangled your feet back and forth for a bit before Harry came over.
“What’re you thinking?”
“I’m thinking that…this is fucking insane.” You chuckled.
“In a good way?”
“Yeah…bad too.” You hummed and he nodded and leaned in to kiss your cheek.
“It’s going to be just fine, baby.” He assured you right as the doctor knocked at the door. “Come in!” Harry called and soon the woman was coming in.
“Hello, Y/N!” Dr. Sallow greeted you sweetly, “Glad you’re back!” She said with glee and you smiled.
“Thank you.” You replied, “And ummm, this is Harry, my…partner.” You said and she turned to him and smiled.
“Harry, wonderful to meet you.” She smiled and extended her hand and they shook them quickly before she walked over to the screen. “So, you’re here because you are pregnant.” She said and you nodded, “I can confirm that.” She smiled and Harry squeezed your knee when you inhaled sharply. It sort of felt official now. “So we can definitely do an ultrasound if you’d like, the room is available. Or did you have other questions?” she asked.
“Definitely an ultrasound. Want to know how far along I am and that sort of thing.”
“I’d assume fairly early if you’re just noticing any symptoms, so don’t be too disappointed if we don’t see much of anything just yet.” She forewarned and you both nodded. “Alright, I’m gonna have nurse Debbie set up the room and then she’ll escort you over and we’ll get a look at you.”
“Thank you.” You smiled and soon she excused herself before fluttering off to her next patient. You only waited a couple of minutes before nurse Debbie came to escort you to the ultrasound room and got you all set up. Harry was practically bouncing beside you with anxiety as he waited. 
“Let me get the doctor.” Debbie said and hurried out. You glanced over to Harry.
“Hey, hold my hand.” You said and he dragged a chair over and interlocked your fingers. “I’m so excited to see.” You whispered and he grinned wide.
“Me too.” He confessed and you chuckled. “Maybe we…think a bit more about keeping it…” he suggested and you smiled a bit.
“Yeah? You mean it?” You asked softly and he nodded.
“I do, baby.” He smiled. 
A few moments later Dr. Sallow was announcing herself again before coming in. She explained the procedure and then got the gel on you before grabbing the camera and gliding it over your tummy, looking for the best spot.
“Oh…there we are.” she hummed and Harry immediately shot upon seeing the image projected on the screen.
“Oh my god…” he whispered as he squeezed your hand tight and you smiled up at him quickly before you both glanced back over to the screen.
“So that there is the head and the arms and legs…” she pointed out and shifted the angle, “Do you want to know the sex?” She asked as she turned to you and you chuckled.
“That’s…ummm, isn’t it a bit early to know that?” You asked her and she shook her head.
“Not at all, we can tell as early as 10 week if the position is right.” She explained and you’re heart stopped.
“And I’m already 10 weeks along?” You asked shakily as the realization of what this meant started to settle in. You felt Harry starting to pull his hand away from yours.
“Oh no, you’re more like 14 weeks, dear.” She said and that’s when Harry completely pulled away from you and you felt the air completely leave your lungs. You turned to him and he just clenched his jaw as he ran his fingers through the top of his hair. “So do you want to know?” She asked and you were so frozen that you nodded quickly as your eyes teared up. “It’s a girl.” She said with a smiled and you just nodded.
“That’s…that’s so great.” You whispered and then brought a hand up over your mouth in an attempt to muffle the sound as started to cry. Dr. Sallow turned to you quickly with concern and then you felt Harry’s hand grab yours again. You turned towards him and saw he was crying too. “I’m sorry.” You whispered and he shook his head.
“We’ll talk about it.” He said to you softly and you nodded.
“Is everything alright?” Dr. Sallow asked and you sniffled.
“Sorry, yes. I just didn’t mean to say that.” You explained and she apologized but you assured her it was fine. 
You just wanted to get out of there… you were mortified. This wasn’t Harry’s baby and now you really had no idea what to do. You always used condoms with Steven, but now that you knew he was psycho, you had no doubt that he was capable of sabotaging you like this. More than anything you were so hurt and angry that he had taken this from you and Harry. For a second you almost turned and asked for an appointment for an abortion but you glanced at the screen and you were flooded with guilt for even thinking that.
“Ummm, I’d like to leave.” You said as you started to sit up and Dr. Sallow was quick to clean you off. Harry helped you off of the reclining seat and you were back on the road not even ten minutes later. 
You were just silent the whole way home, you felt like shit. You felt awful for getting Harry all excited only to know that this was not his child you were carrying. You were so confused right now, you almost wanted to pinch yourself and hope you woke up. You could feel Harry continuously glancing over at you but you couldn’t look at him. There was no way you could look at him after this. It was over between you two…there was no way you could ask him to stay with you after this. It wouldn’t be fair to him. When you got to the house you made it to the stairwell and plopped down as you started to sob violently.
You moved to the side when you saw Harry coming over, assuming he was just going to go up to the bedroom. But then he crouched down and sat a step above you and pulled you into him by the shoulders.
“It’s o-”
“Don’t say it’s okay.” You cut him off, “This is not okay.” You whispered sadly. “I hate Steven.” You seethed and he swallowed thickly as you started to sob and he pulled you closer and kissed the side of your head.
“I love you, okay? This doesn’t change that for me.” He said to you and you shook your head.
“I would never ask you or expect to stay. It’s not fair to you, Harry…” you said sadly, “I was about to tell Dr. Sallow that I wanted to abort but then I saw the screen again and I just…I don’t think I can do it. That’s like…a part of me too and I just…I don’t think I can go through with it.” You said again, sputtering on your tears. “If that means that we’re over, I get it. I totally understand it.” You sniffled.
Harry frowned deeply as he heard you say this. His heart was completely torn right now. He thought you were reacting this way because you were going to terminate the pregnancy upon finding out that it wasn’t your baby together. But hearing you say that you wouldn’t be able to do that, it made him so angry and so hurt. Despite his own feelings about this, he fully understood why changed your mind. After seeing the tiny little thing tucked inside of you his heart was in shambles too. He was fully ready to advocate for you guys keeping it, but hearing how far along you were, it completely shattered his heart. He felt physically ill as the moment replayed in his brain. You’d both slept with other people during your time apart, so he wasn’t angry at that, it was more that it was Steven’s. A man who had hurt you and disrespected you and that scared you. It made the hate he felt for him grow even more intense than it already was. He was livid, he could kill him for taking this from you two. Harry had to decide how he would proceed from here. You were fully prepared to leave him again in order to keep this baby and the thought of it put so much sorrow in his heart. He didn’t want to lose you.
The idea of leaving you and letting you do this all on your own made his sad. You didn’t deserve that. You deserved to have a good pregnancy, one that came with a supportive partner, someone to share the experience with. He wanted to be the person to be there for you but right now the thought of that little thing growing inside of you made his blood boil with hatred. He couldn’t think clearly in the slightest. 
“I ummm…I love you so much, baby. I just, I think I need some time t-to process this and just think about it all.” He said to you and you nodded. “I love you though. You know that right?” He asked and you nodded again as he kissed the side of your head.
“Love you too.” You whispered and he hummed. “Should I go for a couple of days?” You asked quietly.
“No, baby.” He said quietly, “You stay here and rest up.” He hummed lowly, “I think I’m gonna go up north and just spend a few days with my mum, clear my head, if that’s alright?” He asked. You wanted to say no, the last thing you wanted right now was to be all alone with this information. But you had no choice but to agree, you had just put him in the most impossible position and he deserved to have the space to think about it as calmly and comfortably as possible.
“Yeah, sure.” You whispered.
“Can I tell my mum?” He asked and you sighed.
“Why the fuck not…” You chuckled through your tears and he pouted.
“Hey, look at me.” He insisted, “I won’t if you don’t want me to, baby. This is about you, about your body. If you want me to keep it to myself I will.” He assured.
“Sorry. I’m just afraid that it’ll change how she feels about me.” You explained nervously. You’d had a wonderful relationship with Anne. You missed her wisdom and kindness and friendship during your time apart from Harry and hearing that another man had impregnated you, her son’s girlfriend, well you’d understand if it upset her. 
“No…I mean, things happen. Accidents happen.” He said and you shook your head.
“Baby, I-I don’t think this was accidental because we used a condom every single time. I’m certain of it!” You wept, “Like I’m not stupid, or careless like that.” You assured.
“You think he ruined the condoms?” He asked and you sighed as you recalled all of the overtly possessive things Steven had been saying to you during sex the last month or so that you had been together. Things about making you his forever, about giving him babies one day, making you a mom…you thought he was just introducing some of his preferences in bed with that kind of talk, but maybe it was more than that. 
“It’s very possible.” You said softly.
“Jesus…” he shook his head, “How fucked up was this guy?” He asked you and you shrugged.
“I never saw that side of him before all of this.” You said and Harry sighed and nodded. After a moment of silence he cleared his throat.
“Ummm…I’m just gonna pack and head out soon, want to avoid that rush hour traffic near Birmingham.” He said and you nodded. 
He stood up and then offered to help you stand as well before you guys went up to the room. You sat on the bed as you watched him pack a couple days worth of clothes. You wanted to ask him to stay, but you couldn’t be that selfish. This was the least you could do for him after that a-bomb was just dropped on him. Not to mention the a-bomb you’d just dumped on him too. When he finished packing up his bag he went over and kissed you quickly.
“I’m not running away from you, okay? I just need to clear my head.” He reassured you, his words were mumbled against your forehead before he kissed you there, “I love you so much.” He whispered before kissing your lips.
“Love you.” You mumbled, “Text when you get there, yeah?”
“I will, baby.” He assured.
“Be safe.”
“Always.” He hummed before he bid you farewell once more before he left. 
Once you heard him pull out of the driveway you just curled up on your side and started to cry. This couldn’t be real…there was no way this could be real. You felt completely defeated. The only thing you could think that made you happy was that you never wanted Steven to know about this, you didn’t want to give him the satisfaction. You had no idea how that would go down with your child in the future, but right now you wanted him not to know a single thing about you ever again. After coming to that conclusion you ended up calling your mom and telling her everything that happened. You talked and cried for nearly an hour before she had to go, but not without promising she’d call again and chat the next day in order to keep you some company, even from afar. 
After that you decided to draw yourself a warm and relaxing bath, that always made you feel so calm. So you started out on that, letting your bath bomb melt in the warm water as you made yourself a nice cup of tea, your last caffeinated one for the foreseeable future, and then got inside.
*****************
Harry had been driving up the M1 motorway for a bit before he quickly texted his mum his ETA. This caused her to call him right away and ask what this surprise visit was about, but he couldn’t speak when he answered her call. He just sobbed, he sobbed for nearly 15 minutes before he shared what had happened that morning at the doctor’s office. He explained everything he was feeling, even the bad things he was thinking, but the one thing that kept coming up was how much he loved you.
“I love her so much but I just don’t think I could get past the fact that, that prick is the baby’s dad…I cannot for the life of me sit with that information and not become enraged by it.” He said, it pained him to spare Steven a thought.
“D-do you feel angry at Y/N for being with him?” She asked and he frowned.
“No/ It’s not like I didn’t see other people but I hate that she thinks that I couldn’t be with her after this. Like, I think about letting her go, like she’s saying, and it absolutely guts me.” He explained. “And like…I feel bad that it crossed my mind at some point, but not for the reasons you might think, it’s just that I don’t know i-if I am even prepared to take that role on.” He sniffled.
“No one ever is, even when it’s meticulously planned, H.” She reasoned and he sighed,
“Are you concerned about him wanting to come back into her life?” She asked and he nodded.
“Yeah…a bit.” He admitted, “I mean, I don’t think he’s the type to take any accountability for his actions but if he finds out about it he’s so arrogant that he might want to just to make her uncomfortable. I mean, Y/N thinks it may have been deliberate because she said she always made sure t-to use protection. I mean, I wouldn’t put it past him to do something like that, the man was completely mad.” He shared and his mum hummed in understanding.
“Well sweetheart, it doesn’t sound to me like you’re all that conflicted. It sounds to me like you don’t want to end things with her.”
“Of course not! But what if I…what I can’t love that baby as much since I now know this?” He asked.
“I-is that what’s holding you back?” She asked and he hummed on confirmation. He felt like a complete prick saying that but he was legitimately concerned about this. What if you went on to have your own kids together and it just changed something in him? What if he was open to being with you now but then changed his mind? What if he saw Steven every time he saw that baby and only felt anger instead of love? The chances of something like this happening were extremely low, practically non-existent, but not 0%. And in the end he would hurt you and that baby even more if he walked out because one of these things happened.
“You know what I think?”
“What?”
“I think you will love her just fine, H. You know why?” She asked and he hummed, “Because out of everyone in the world you know the impact that one incredible and dedicated man can have on a child.” She said and he sniffled, “You’ve seen for yourself that a biological connection is not needed to give someone unconditional love and support. You’re lucky, you got that from two fathers.” She said and he smiled.
“Yeah.” He whispered.
“I’m not saying that it won’t be scary and difficult at times t-to do this, but it can also be extremely beautiful and rewarding. You’re both such wonderful people that if you decided to stay and do this together you could impact that child’s life for the better, just like yours was.” 
“Right…” he said softly
“And well, honestly sweetheart, these concerns you have, they’re things you need to figure out with Y/N. She will listen to you, H. I mean, if you’re feeling this conflicted about things I can’t image how she must be feeling now.” she said with sympathy and when he saw himself nearing Birmingham he felt awful. It got as bad as him feeling sick to his stomach as he pictured your fearful and distraught face back in the bedroom. He’d done it again, he’d left you hanging at a time when you needed his love and support the most. He loved you so much, he could not believe he’d left you alone in that state. And in two seconds he started to signal to get off of the motorway.
“Mum, I ummm…I need to go back and be with, Y/N.” He decided, “I shouldn’t have left here there by herself after everything she had to hear today…I’d be surprised if she was still there after I just walked out…fuck!” He groaned in frustration.
“H, she loves you so much.”
“I love her too…why do I keep doing the wrong thing and hurting her?” He cried now as he got off at the next exit. He was waiting for the traffic to clear before he could make his turn to turn around.
“I think it kind of scares you, how much you love her. And I think in a way you might feel like you could lose her, so you pull back regardless of how that might make her feel. It’s self preservation.” She explained and he swallowed thickly. Hearing this helped him mentally decide that he wasn’t going to run any more, after everything he’d done you’d given him another chance regardless of the possibility of him hurting you again. This was his chance to show you that his love for you was bigger than everything else. “Don’t be afraid to open your heart, sweetheart.” She added and he hummed.
“Alright, thank you for listening. I’m just gonna call Dr. A and ummm…hopefully sort some mental things out before I get back to Y/N.” He said.
“Okay, bub. Be safe, please let me know when you’re home safe. I love you.”
“Love you.” He mumbled before he hung up and got back onto the motorway but heading back towards the South. He wasn’t going to do the same thing again and leave all alone to guess just how much he loved you, not this time. He was going to be there for you and support you and love you both.
*****************
It was a bit odd to you when you heard the large gate to Harry’s house opening up. But then you recalled that sometimes his PA would do errands that required him to come to the house. So you just got out of the tub quickly and rinsed your body off in the shower before getting into your robe in case he came upstairs for any reason. You were just getting one of Harry’s hoodies when you heard his voice.
“Baby? Are you still here?” He called out as you heard the front door shut heavily against the frame. You hurried into the yoga pants you’d grabbed and rushed out to see him coming up the stairs. 
“You came back.” You sighed in relief as he hurried up and he just pulled you right into his arms and you started to cry.
“I’m so sorry. I should never have left you like this, baby.” He sniffled as he kissed your head over and over again. “I love you so much. I love you so fucking much.” He assured you. “I’m not leaving you alone with this, baby.” He said to you and you pulled back a bit to look at him.
“What do you…mean by that?”
“It means that we’re doing this together.” He said to you and you shook your head.
“I can’t…I couldn’t do that to you.” You said to him and he shook his head.
“You’re not doing anything to me, baby. If you’re keeping this baby I am choosing to do this with you. I know it’s going to be hard but I will be there for you every step of the way and love our little babygirl with everything I am. I love you far too much to not see this through with you.” He said and you just broke down and hugged him tight.
You had no words, there was just joy. You knew this would be hard and challenging and even sad at times, but he’d come back to you and he wanted you to stay with him.
“I love you so much, H.” You finally whispered before kissing his lips.
“You’re everything to me, baby. We’re gonna get through this.” He smiled and you smiled.
“Promise?”
“I promise.” He smiled, “It was actually my mum who reminded me that biology had nothing to do with being a great father, so…she doesn’t hate you.” He said and you chuckled through your tears.
“Good, that would’ve definitely been the worst outcome.” You said jokingly and he smiled. “And look, I know that there are a lot of logistics and other things to discuss and I’m still sorting through that mentally, s-so if you can just be a little patient with me while I…get that together in my head I would really appreciate that. I’m still processing that there’s a little person forming in there and it’s kind of…freaky.” You said as you looked up into his eyes and he sputtered on a laugh. You frowned at his reaction, “What?”
“I thought you were going to say it was magical or amazing, not freaky.” He giggled and you did as well. 
“Oh…well, I…I don’t feel…happy about it yet.” You confessed to him and this brought on a fresh wave of tears, “I feel like shit about that. Like I’m gonna be a mom, I should be happy, not freaked out, shouldn’t I?” You asked him.
“Not necessarily. You can feel however you want about it, baby.” He assured you, “Especially in this situation, it’s come as a surprise to you. I don’t judge you at all for not feeling happy about this yet, baby.”
“Promise?”
“I swear it.” He promised before pecking your lips again quickly.
“Thank you.” You whispered and he nodded and smile at you.
“Wanna do something to take your mind off of things for a bit?” He asked.
“Like what?”
“We can…sort through the pantry and fridge and see what foods you’ll have an aversion to?” He offered and you smiled and shook your head at his bizarre, yet completely productive suggestion. “I see you trying to hold back your smile.” He teased and you finally gave in.
“That’s the wildest but most genius thing you’ve ever suggested.” You giggled.
“I know. Imagine how smart our kid’s gonna be?! We’ve got this in the bag.” He said confidently.
“You think so?” You asked and he nodded.
“With you as her mum, I know so.” He smiled.
…. 1 YEAR LATER ….
You woke up feeling completely refreshed and renewed. It was absolutely quiet in the house and it was strange to wake up in silence. When you rolled over and looked at your phone you saw it was nearly 10am and shot out of bed. You had no idea how you’d slept in that much! The baby needed to be fed and changed! You hurried over to the nursery already thinking up an apology in your head for Ellie. But when you made it into the nursery it was empty. Harry had some work to do for Pleasing today so you knew he’d be out. Maybe he called someone to come look after the baby? When you passed by his home studio on the way to the kitchen you heard his voice along with others, so you knocked on the door.
“Come in!” He called quickly and you peeked inside and immediately smiled when you saw Harry spin around in the chair with Elara sitting on his lap, she was literally just chilling there while she drooled all over one of the newer nail polishes Pleasing would release soon. He smiled at you over the sounds of whoever was speaking right now. “Hey guys, are we good for today or is there anything else we needed to go over?” He asked with a smile as you waved from the background.
“We’re all good!” You heard and then heard the multiple voices bidding farewell to you and baby Elara before he hung up.
“You didn’t have to do that.” You said to him as you walked into the room to grab her from him.
“It’s alright, baby, we were just chatting a bit.” He assured you, “Weren’t we?” He asked the baby who just ignored him to keep attempting to bite the bottle in her hands before he started to rub at her back.
“I know you had work, you should’ve woken me up.” You said as you kissed his head.
“No way.” He chuckled, “You know, you slept through two whole alarms, you clearly needed the rest. I thought you were dead for second there.” He said with grin and you tutted.
“Don’t even say that.” You scolded.
“You’re right, sorry. Bad joke.” He corrected himself, “But really, my love, I don’t mind doing these launch plan meetings online, it’s none of the fun stuff so.” He shrugged and you smiled, “Besides when I have Ellie on camera everyone is so obsessed with her little smile that they’re so agreeable, so it’s a win-win.” He chuckled and you smirked.
“God forbid the paps see her and exploit her for money, but her own father is exploiting her cuteness for sway in the board room.” You said with a grin and he chuckled.
“Hey, she likes hearing all the commotion too.” He added and you smiled before kissing the top of her head and she sighed and laid over his chest making you both coo. “She finally slept through the night. Sorry you missed it.” He said softly and you chuckled.
“I’m sorry you’re so used to waking up to her crying that you noticed!” You giggled as you raked your fingers through his curls easily and he hummed.
“I don’t mind it. Reminds me that this little cutie is finally here.” He said and you smiled at how sweet he was with her.
“I can’t believe she’ll be six whole months tomorrow.” You said in disbelief.
“I know…S’your half birthday, bub.” He said to her and she just blinked tiredly, "She’s perfect though, isn’t she? Your little twin.” He hummed with pride as he looked down at her and then at you again. You nodded and watched him with her for a few moments.
Harry had nothing but love for baby Elara. He adored her completely. He almost felt silly for being so worried that he wouldn’t bond with her as genuinely as if she were his biological daughter. Once he saw you starting to show and you guys started shopping for the nursery, and picking out baby names, every ounce of doubt he had melted away. That was his daughter in every sense of the word. He had so much love for the both of you that he felt like his heart would burst sometimes.
“I love you so much.” You said to him and he glanced up at you.
“More than Ellie?” He smirked and you chuckled.
“The same, I think.” You hummed and he looked surprised.
“Oh wow, I was expecting a firm no.” He laughed.
“Oh my god…I love you both. It’s a bit different for sure but I somehow get it all to fit in my heart.” You said and he smiled as he stood up.
“Look at her, she’s about to pass out again.” He said as he looked down at the baby.
“I think we should get her back in the crib and have a cuddle. We can watch that show you’ve been pestering me about.” He suggested
“Love is Blind?” You gasped and he nodded. 
Soon enough you had washed your face and brushed your teeth, as you did every morning, all while Harry got Ellie down. But he soon joined you in bed as you waited for him to return. He climbed into the bed beside you and like a magnet, you immediately scooted right up against him and kissed him gently, it caught him by surprise.
“Thank you for letting me sleep in, baby. That was exquisite.” You confessed and he smiled and pecked your lips again.
“Of course, baby. Anytime.” He smiled. “I do have a question for you though…when are we going to have another baby?” He asked you and you giggled.
“Ummm, ask me in a year!” You laughed.
“A year?” He scoffed.
“Hey, it’s hard work!” You added and he smiled.
“Yeah, but it’s so worth it, isn’t it?” He asked with a smile and you sighed happily at his response.
“Yeah…” you hummed, “It’s all worth it.” You smiled.
“Our little family makes me so happy, I just want one more.” He said and you glanced into his eyes.
“Just one more.” You agreed and he chuckled.
“Yeah, just one.” He assured you, “So in a year I’ll ask again, okay?”
“Okay.” You sniggered and kissed him quickly again before you got the show going.
You were explaining a little bit about why you were suddenly so interested in this show without trying to give away too much of what you knew had gone down, thanks to your friends and social media. He easily got sucked into the narrative and when you both started commenting as you watched on you just got so happy that you could share something so simple together and then also something as huge and serious as a baby. It made your tummy flutter and swirl with love for him and you then realized that maybe it would be less than a year before you’d be trying for another baby and you were perfectly alright with that.
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rafesslxt · 15 hours
Text
neglected | mattheo riddle
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summary: Theodore completly ignores you and doesnt take it serious that you miss him while he flirts with another girl at a party.. so his best friend has to help you filling up that hole inside your … chest.
warning: cheating? but is it if he does it first?, mattheo eating out the reader, fingering, nipple play, teasing, dirty talk, getting caught, he‘s a munch don‘t fight with me over this -
note: i do not support cheating, this is just for the story
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— monday —
I don‘t know how many times I already begged but from time to time.. i felt more and more neglected.
"Theo, please just this one weekend! You had been busy with your friends and studying the last 3 weeks!" Yeah, 3 weeks since my boyfriend went on a date with me, had some quality time or touched me.
"Y/n I told you I don‘t have time. I already promised the boys I‘d come to the party. We‘ll see us there, I have to go study now, with Lydia." Before I could even say a word he left his dorm. I hear a chuckle coming from the other side of the room, making me turn my head in it’s direction.
"Told you you deserve better baby." Mattheo, Theodore‘s best friend said, sitting on his bed. They share a dorm and every now and then he would see Theo and me arguing.
I huff and leave the room, a aching feeling in my body.
— the next day —
"Theo please, I need you. You didn‘t touch me once the last few weeks." I whine into his ear, sitting next to him. He just groans, but not the way I want him to and gets up with his book in his hands. "Don‘t you see that you‘re distracting me?" Irritated he leaves the room, probably walking off to the library again.
Ugh.. i let myself fall back down onto the mattress and cross my arms over my face. Is it my fault? Did my body change somehow? Why the hell won‘t he touch me? But before I could continue my thoughts, I hear the door again, my head shooting up, hoping it is Theo who changed his mind but no, it‘s Mattheo. I groan frustrated and let my head fall back.
"Wow nice to see you too baby, but I think you‘re laying on the wrong bed." he says, teasing me.
"Sometimes I think like that too." I mumble into my arms and more to myself.
"What was that?" he asks. "Nothing."
— two days later —
Patiently I wait on Theo‘s bed, dressed all up.. or down, in his favorite lingerie set and a pair of black knee socks. When we got together half a year ago he told me he loved them on me, made my legs look even longer.
As the door opens my heart starts beating faster and I look up, shrieking and pulling the blanket over my body as I see who it is. "Damn mami is that for me?" Mattheo asks as he stand in front of Theo‘s bed with a smirk on his face, his mouth wide open.
"What the fuck are you doing here?" I asked furious, not wanting him to see me like that. What If Theo comes in and would see us, what would he think?
"Last time I checked this is my room, sweetcheeks." "But you‘re supposed to have quidditch practice!" I whine and look for my clothes.
He chuckles and steps a bit closer as I stand up from the bed. "Could you turn around? I wanna get dressed." "No." "You are such a pain in the ass!" I roll my eyes at him and take my wand, mumbling "Colloportus“. and holding it towards the door so no one can come inside.
I let go of the blanket, thinking fuck it, and grab my skirt, pulling it over my legs and then my hips. "Did your cute little boyfriend leave you unsatisfied again?" he grins and takes a step closer. "You know.. I could help you with that." he says in a suggestive tone. "He’s your best friend Mattheo, stop this shit." "I can’t princess. Hurts me to see that pretty little body of yours, knowing how desperate it must be after all these weeks." he whispers the last part as he lets his fingers slowly brush over my arm, sending shivers down my spine. "See? It’s so hot for just a little attention." "No, it is cold, thats why." I say, swallowing down the clump in my throat as i nod towards the opened window.
Just as I wanted to reach down for my top, I see Mattheo getting down on his knees in front of me. He looks up and licks his lips. Damn.. something about a men on his knees for me made me feel slme type of way.
"Please let me touch your legs, please. Need to know how soft these pretty thighs feel." I could feel his warm breath against my skin, again, sending shivers down my… spine. wet pussy
"Mattheo get the fuck up I swear to god!" i hiss at him. Yes I closed the door with a spell but it wasn‘t really hard for everyone above first years to open it with a spell.
"Please, I swear If you let me just touch it I‘m gonna leave you alone for the rest of the week!" he pleads, looking at my face and then my legs. I sigh as I think about letting him. Damn was I really thinking about it? Am I really going to let my boyfriends best friend touch my thighs?
But I mean.. nothing’s wrong If I don‘t feel anything for it, right? Plus he would just leave me alone for a bit. "Fine." I press out.
As soon as the words leave my mouth, I feel his big warm hands on my thighs. "Shit.." he mumbles as he lets them wander up and down my legs. He slighty squeezes them, making me sigh in relief.
I feel his curls against my skin before I can look down and see him kissing my flesh, grabbing it with a bit more strengh now. I had to bite my bottom lip as he starts massaging them. Completly lost in thoughts, I realize too late what he was doing.
Suddenly he stands up and kisses my cheek "Thank you, doll.", before leaving the dorm and leaving me breathless in the middle of the room. As I slowly come back from the dizzy feeling inside my head I again, stretch over to get my top but gasp with shaky breathing as I see what Mattheo left on my skin.
A hickey. And a bite mark. I didn‘t even notice him biting my leg. Shit.
— Saturday —
To say i was pissed, while sitting on a chair in some corner of the common room, was a big understatement. Theodore and I arrived at the party he talked about a few days ago.. 2hours ago. I saw him drinking with his friends and playing truth or dare in a little group, always walking away from me as soon as I approached him. So I decided to stop chasing him.
"What are you doing here all alone sweetcheeks?" I look to my right and see Mattheo. Of course it was him. "Leave me alone." I say, rolling my eyes and looking back to my boyfriend, sitting beside this girl named Lydia. She was a year under us I think.
Mattheo followed my gaze and shakes his head. "Well , the deal was I would leave you alone till end of the week. The week is over." I don‘t even answer him, not in the mood to argue.
"Yeah thanks for the hickey and the mark between." i say sarcastically. "Yeah it‘s not like your boyfriend would see, right?"
I roll my eyes again and look back at Theodore, to see him standing up. What was he going to do? Suddenly I see him taking Lydia‘s hand, pulling her up with him and kissing her. In shock I opened my mouth, but instead of crying like i normally would, my face got red in anger.
I tried everything and here he stands sucking of the face of that stupid thot. In the middle of the common room? With the girl he "studys" all the time? I bet that’s not the first time they kiss. Mattheo seems to see it too and looks at me more serious now. "Hey.. are you okay? I mean he‘s not worth it If you - " but before he can continue I grab him at the collor of his shirt and drag him with me to his dorm.
— 30 minutes later —
"Oh fuck yes, Mattheo!" I moan into the air, pushing his head against me while his lips suck on my clit, his fingers pumping inside me. "Shit who would have known that you go this feral for my tounge huh?" he smiles and mumbles against my skin.
"Stop talking and continue!" I whine and push his head back. I hear him chuckle before he laps at my throbbing clit again. God If I would have known how good this feels I would have had ended things with Theo way sooner.
His free hand slides across my body up to my left boob where he started to tease my nipple. I gasp and push my hips up, arching my back. My body was so sensitive I wanted to cry out of pleasure everytime he touched me somewhere.
It didn‘t took me long before my body starts trembling and shaking, Mattheo licking everything up as I come on his tounge.
"I could get drunk on your pussy." he groans before kissing me, making me taste myself on his lips.
"I hope you‘re ready cause that pussy screams for me." he whispers against my lips before going down on me again.
A few minutes in I hear someone yell. "WHAT THE FUCK?"
My head shot up and I looked to the door where Theo stood, looking ag us with an angry face.
I saw Mattheo looking at him over his shoulder, smiling at him with glistening lips. "Hey men, hope you don‘t mind? We got the impression you were busy.. never mind – bro how could you not eat that pussy like.. all day?"
"I‘m gonna kill you, Riddle!"
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shorter than usual but I liked it 🌼
thanks for reading and supporting 🫶🏻
xoxo sarah <3
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kedsandtubesocks · 2 days
Text
seasons of you (year 1 - spring)
Farmer!Joel Miller x F!Reader
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summary: it’s your very first spring living in the valley & you’re very sure Joel Miller already wants you leave
warnings/tags: 18+ ONLY MDNI, stardew valley AU, reader is a new farmer & has a family but no physical description, mentions of unspecified age gap (reader’s age is not mentioned but Joel is older & in his 50’s) very light use of gendered language, handyman & farmer!Joel, grumpy!Joel, wound tending & blood imagery, discussion of family loss with light navigation of grief, Ellie being Joel’s daughter, secret softie!Joel, alcohol consumption mention, use of nickname, budding romance
word count: 5.4k
a/n: our first ‘Joel’ fic for our stardew AU series! Here’s to starting this new aventure with y’all! I couldn’t have the strength to post this without @swiftispunk @lowlights @ahauntedcowboy @burntheedges @perotovar you angels don’t know how much I appreciate y’all and am so grateful for you babes…and to you, if you read this - I’m so thankful for you too ♡
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No one in Pelican Town hates you more than Joel Miller does. George, the crabby older elderly man in town, might be a close second, but Joel has him beat by miles.
For someone so incredibly handsome, almost beautiful in a rugged wilderness way with his misty mountain gray hair and sharp lovely nose, his glare could wither your entire family farm’s field.
“He’s just an ass sometimes.” Your Dad had told you with a sigh over the phone. “Been that way even when your gramps was around.”
At first you didn’t want to fully admit it but yeah, Joel is a prickly cactus of a man.
He owns a farm further down the path from yours. You love walking by it when you take the long way home and getting to spot all the sheep roaming around his fields. He’s also the town’s handyman.
“A jack of all trades, more like it.” Pierre, the main store owner, snickered that to you while Joel was in the store fixing a light fixture.
After that Joel helped you set up your first fencing gate. Then he fixed your sink. And then your water heater.
It’s been a lot and you know it. You feel guilty at how bad you can’t seem to get a hang of this new life yet. Your grandpa did it, thrived even. You can too, or you hope you can.
Until Joel glares at you like you’re a bug ready to squash, then you feel incredibly small.
Once you physically and accidentally ran into him walking out of the blacksmith’s shop when he was heading in. You sputtered out an apology, but without a single word Joel walked past you as if you weren’t even worth his time.
One night you went to the town’s saloon hoping to maybe mingle and get to know everyone better. But simply seeing him sitting inside made you turn on your heels and scramble out.
From that point on you’ve been avoiding him.
But now unfortunately, a few paces away from Joel Miller’s farm, your hand bleeds out a bit aggressively.
“Shit.” You hiss, slipping off your backpack to search for your mini first aid kit.
Yesterday you stubbornly tried fixing your fence and accidentally scrapped your hand pretty bad against the wood. Earlier you believed you wrapped it good enough but now the blood soaking through the bandaid mocks you.
“You alright?!”
The sharp accented drawl rings out loud in the early morning and fear collides into you.
Of course Joel hadn’t left for the morning.
You yell back that you’re fine but scramble frantic now trying to find the damn first aid kit.
“Is that blood?” Joel snaps, sounding closer, as his boots rush against the dirt.
“No, I spilled paint.” You grumble to yourself annoyed.
“M’old but I fuckin’ heard that.” Damn.
He’s much closer now, so close his shadow falls over you but you refuse to look at him.
“What happened!?” He barks confused.
Sighing, you give up hope on finding the poor elusive first aid kit.
“Just cut my hand, that's all. It isn’t deep. I’m fine.” You reassure him.
Joel sighs angrily.
“Come on.”
Now you turn and discover his soil eyes stare at you with such a steeled intensity you almost want to scurry away.
“Fixin’ this up inside.” He doesn’t even ask or let you leave. With one yank Joel Miller pulls you towards his farmhouse.
“I’m fine.” You snap back.
“What? Just wanna let it bleed ‘n get everywhere?” An edge in Joel’s voice silences you.
Any argument you wanted to hiss out immediately floats away the moment you cross the threshold into his house. Your eyes go wide. You never once thought you’d ever see the inside of Joel Miller’s place.
It’s larger than your grandpa's.
Joel deposits you into his kitchen. The lingering smell of breakfast, possibly oatmeal with its warm cinnamon notes, hangs in the air. Yet you feel like a caught feral cat that doesn’t know how to react being inside a house for the first time.
So you let your eyes wander.
Beautiful wood cupboards line the walls. A fridge is covered with various papers held up by sweet colorful cartoonish magnets you never would’ve expected from him. A worn cozy, well loved, couch peeks out from the slight view of the living room you spot being inside the kitchen.
Joel’s house seems knitted together by a rustic weathered comfort. Yet, there’s a hollowness to the house, like it’s waiting for more spirit to fill the halls. You can’t pinpoint or describe the stillness here in this place, but you sense it.
After rustling around a drawer, Joel yanks out a rather impressive medical kit. Largely bulky and intimidating, like him, it’s no surprise a handyman and farmer has such a first aid kit.
“How’d it happen?” Joel asks gruff and quiet as he rummages around the bag.
You tell him and his seasoned face scrunches up frustrated.
“Why didn’t ya call and have me go fix it?”
You thought about that. But you couldn’t handle the thought of asking him to help again, to deal with his frustrated sighs and gruff annoyance. He barely said a word to you last weekend when he went to check your sink again.
“Don’t need you to fix everything.” You tell him composed while Joel pulls out various things to wrap your wound.
“Besides, I can fix things on my own.” You add firm.
“Not all the time.” He replies.
You stay quiet and watch his hands, large and callous, gingerly dab away all the crimson from your cut.
He’s never been this close to you. You catch the faintest smell of wood and of something clean crisp, his laundry detergent maybe. It threatens to fog your senses knowing he smells this lovely.
“Y’dont ask for help and shit like this happens.”
Your face hardens at Joel’s words. You even childishly want to yank away your hand and storm off.
“Look I get it, you barely tolerate me and think I can’t do shit. I know I’m still new, but this was an accident. It happens.” Your words come out harsher than you intended, sharpened scythes that cut through the room, and Joel freezes.
“I don’t think that.” He replies clear as a spring blue sky.
You want to bark a laugh of disbelief, but instead you simply stay silent.
Joel sighs, keeping his eyes on the medic tape he readies.
“And I… tolerate you.” He sputters like he’s trying to muster the words out.
A moment passes. Then Joel sighs, ancient and heavy.
“Don’t mind me. M’just some grumpy old fuck-”
“Hey you’re not old. You’re just grumpy.” You interrupt trying to ease the mood and your heart jumps hearing him snort.
“M’old.” He clarifies. He is older, older than you, and that fact creates a strange flutter in your chest you don’t want to explore just yet.
“And…don’t want ya feelin’ like shit.” He continues with a curt softness.
You never knew his voice could sound this layered, so tough but tender.
“Just tryin’ to look out for ya like your gramps asked me too.”
There’s a strange apology shaded in his words but you manage to catch it. A rush of emotions drown you in their current.
“You were close with my grandpa.” You comment with a curious question lingering below the surface.
“Yeah,” Joel answers low now tenderly moving to wrap your hand. “His ol’ ass used to keep me in place.”
You smirk fondly. That sounds like your gramps.
“Miss seein’ him walk by this place and hearin’ him complain that he likes the sheep more than me.”
Joel’s fond and aching voice digs its hooks into your soul. You miss gramps too, so much.
“Used to fish a lot together out by the lake.” He adds.
This is the most Joel Miller has ever spoken to you and you worry the sun might fall out of the sky soon.
“I bet he out fished you.” You tease soft.
Joel snorts. “Damn right he did.”
You can almost picture it clearly, your gramps and Joel laughing together, having a friendship.
“He’d be proud of ya.” Joel mutters but his words chime clear.
Your attention flickers to Joel. He keeps his focus steady on your hand. However his words crystallize deep in your heart and you blink away tears. You ever expected Joel Miller to almost make you cry like this.
“Thanks…means a lot.” You truthfully tell him while you swallow back the heartache and love threatening to spill over.
“He’d also say you’re a fuckin’ stubborn thing for not askin’ for help.”
You snort at that.
“Well you knew the old guy, it runs in the family.” You reply.
Joel chuckles.
It’s small - like the faint flash of seeing a cardinal in the trees. But you heard it, his amusement, and it’s lovely for a man quietly layered as him.
“Alright, all fixed up.”
The wrap is tight, secure, and speaks of his many times previously doing this before.
“Thank you Joel, appreciate it.” You do.
“Can't be a handyman if I can’t fix up people sometimes.” He shrugs but there’s a deadpan charm to his words you’re slowly catching now.
“Doctor and a handyman, no wonder the town keeps you around.” So you dryly joke back.
This moment isn’t much. Yet it feels like gaining a good step in the direction of something right and solid.
Gathering your things, you decide to head out. Even though curiosity claws at you to take in a few more moments being inside Joel Miller’s home, you have seeds to buy.
“Where ya headin’’ to?” Joel asks.
“Pierre’s.” You huff. “Need more parsnips.”
He hums a noise of acknowledgment.
Back outside the mid morning sun’s warmth soaks you in its gaze. Maybe you could fish for a bit before you head to the store. After all, the weather is so nice.
“Hey.” Joel barks out and before heading back on the road, you turn to him.
He’s a sight on his porch. You think of the typical romance movies of the handsome farmer trying to woo the newcomer in town and how right now he puts them all to shame.
Hands crossed over his chest, his broad shoulders seem like mountains against the doorway, so striking and large taking up the entire focus.
“Don’t hesitate to call y’hear? Don’t fuckin’ care what it is or what it’s for, call me.” Joel’s face is hardened and serious, reflecting the unwavering tone in his voice.
Something heated crawls up your throat and makes you dizzy. You blame it on the blood loss.
“Besides, s’what neighbors are for, right?” He adds a bit awkwardly.
It hits you. He’s the closest homestead to you. You are neighbors with him.
“Alright will do, promise.” You nod and mean your words.
“Thanks again neighbor.” Those words tingle on your lips.
Joel nods and with that you head out.
You’re on such a strange high you simply float straight to the pier and fish. It’s comforting being among the crashing waves, the sea breeze, and the wonderful weather. You also think of your gramps and Joel here.
But by the time the sky starts to turn into a ripe tangerine you realize in horror you forget to buy more seeds.
You almost scream in anguish when you find Pierre’s doors locked. Accepting momentary defeat, you head home.
When you reach your porch, there against the steps a bundle of parsnip seeds and a small pack of bandaids sit waiting for you.
- ☼ -
Your hope to quietly enjoy the egg festival, your true first event here in the valley, is diminished when Mayor Lewis practically drags you into the egg hunt saying it’s a rite of passage.
His deadly polite politician smile said there was no way you could worm your way out of participating. So you simply start the hunt thinking of the strawberry seeds you can’t wait to plant once this is over.
You’re not overly competitive, but these eggs are getting harder to find. You want to finish at least with some dignity.
Besides the area around Stardrop Saloon you scan every inch like a hawk. Someone coughs, clearing their throat, and it catches your attention.
Under the shade of the building, nursing a cold drink, Joel slightly turns towards you.
Now instead of a hawk you feel like a surprised field mouse caught in his gaze.
Without saying anything Joel flickers his eyes a couple of times towards the corner of the building. Is he giving you a hint?
Heading to the spot his eyes vaguely guided you to, you discover a colorful egg.
You almost want to keep it as proof this happened. Joel helped you.
By the time the egg hunt ends everyone already seems to be packing up and the mysterious Mr. Miller has vanished from the commotion.
Abigail wins the egg hunt and you aren’t even upset. In fact you walk home feeling like a champion.
The next morning on the help wanted and errands bulletin board in town you spot Joel’s name. Below it is a request asking for a small pack of wood.
You readily answer it and drop off the bundle eagerly, a way to help pay him back for everything.
The pretty decent payment he gives you is nice but the crooked soft hint of a grin on his face when you arrive to deliver the request is worth iridium.
A few days after that he mails you a recipe. The letter is so simply Joel - a straightforward recipe then a scribbled JM below it. You hang the letter up proudly on your fridge.
Spring blooms more and more before your eyes.
You decide to take advantage of it by foraging for the day.
“Where y’heading?”
You’ve been taking the long way to the forest these past few weeks in hopes of seeing him again. Now that you’re not actively avoiding him, you discover, small town or not, Joel is a surprisingly busy man.
When you catch glimpses of him, instead of glares being thrown your way, Joel Miller simply nods acknowledging you. Comforting as it is to know he doesn’t outright detest, you don’t like how much you hope to run into him more.
Now he’s here sliding on his backpack while moving to lock his gate.
“Just heading to the forest, gonna forage and walk around for the day.” You answer him.
“Works out, hafta head that way myself.” Joel explains falling into step besides you.
Alone with Joel Miller once again.
The small talk comes - asking each other how your days have been, anything new or interesting happening. The heat is starting to pick up announcing summer’s close arrival. Thankfully it’s still not unbearably hot as you and him fully enter the woods.
Cindersap forest is tranquil. A beautiful glimmering evergreen haven you enjoy simply strolling through. You never thought you’d ever be here with Joel.
“No new crops coming in?”
“Nothing exciting.” You shrug. “I’m more upset that I didn't plant any tulips this season.”
“Those your favorite?” Joel asks, surprisingly curious.
“Not mine, my gramps.” Your memories of the farm might be hazy, but you always remembered fresh tulips in the kitchen.
“They’re for the fairies.” Gramps would tell you with a wink.
You were bummed after realizing Pierre had flower seeds and it was too late to see them bloom in your kitchen.
“Damn,” Joel sighs. “Ain't your fault. Pierre’s an ass and hides all the good shit, flower seeds included.”
You’re almost positive Pierre doesn’t do that, but you burst out laughing.
A giddy twinkling glee consumes you and fills you buoyant. He’s trying to comfort you in his own Joel way. And it’s dangerous how fast you’re growing to enjoy the company of this grumpy cactus of a man.
You move to snag a few dandelions and wild horseradishes. You make a face at one that smells a bit ripe and decide to leave it for the forest.
“You can eat those y’know.” Joel comments.
“Yeah so I’ve heard.” You tried your first ever daffodil this month. “A wild horseradish might be a bit too much right now though, but who knows. Maybe one day I’ll try ‘em.”
“My kid used to eat these all the damn time. Never took a likin’ to ‘em myself.” Joel grumbles kicking the disposed horseradish.
Kid.
“You have a kid?” You ask curiously.
Joel blinks to you and there’s a gleam in his earth eyes of something reserved slowly revealing itself.
“Uh… yeah. A daughter. Ellie.”
A daughter. He’s a dad.
It fits him in a way that you never would have expected.
“She doesn’t live here?” You ask but then quickly apologize for pressing the subject. Joel waves you off, casual and unbothered.
“She did, just graduated highschool this year. Wanted to do the whole college deal. She lives out west now.”
So he’s an empty nester.
Delicately, wanting to know more about him and his daughter, you ask about her.
Joel inhales deep then exhales slowly, as if an immovable weight on his shoulders rattles deep to his bones.
“She’s a headache, my Ellie.” Fondness trickles out of Joel a steady stream.
“Stubborn, damn near impossible to argue with cause she’s so fuckin’ smart. Got a good heart. Good head on her shoulders too, wants to be an astronaut.”
“An astronaut?! That’s incredible!” You exclaim in brilliant excitement.
Like the proud dad he is, adoration tugs at Joel’s lips.
“Yeah, been wantin’ to be one for years. That’s why she’s going to school.”
“She sounds incredible, Joel. You must be proud.” You earnestly tell him.
“I am…” His voice is thick, and you don’t miss the way his eyes gloss over distant and misty.
You decide not to press the subject any further. He instead does it for you.
“She loved livin’ here until the damn flower festival rolled around. Then she’d swear up ‘n down about how much she hated this town and was gonna leave the second she could.”
The flower festival is just days away. The town swirls in a controlled chaos for its arrival.
You laugh warm. “I’m guessing she’s not a fan of dancing.”
“Takes after me.” Joel nods.
“Ahh…so guess that means you’re not asking anyone to dance this year.” You comment lightly and Joel snorts.
“Ain’t danced with anyone in a very long time.”
A wistful ace now twists your heart thinking of Joel alone in his home, alone watching the others in town pair off.
“You gonna ask anyone?” Joel turns the question around to you and you almost choke on an inhale.
Not wanting to get flustered or react wildly you focus on the wild springs among the lush forest.
“Uh no. Don’t think anyone wants to dance with the newbie in town. Which is fine.” You answer.
There are lovely and gorgeous people in town. Some have caught your eye. However, you didn’t feel brave or interested enough to ask anyone to dance. And no one seemed intended to ask for your hand in the dance, and you find you’re not too upset about that.
Joel hums low, a sign you’re catching on means he’s listening without having to reply much.
“Hopin’ someone will ask ya to dance?” That question takes you by surprise.
You shrug not wanting to fully answer the question either.
Someone suddenly calls out to Joel from behind. At the edge of the forest leading back into town stands Maria, the town’s legal counsel and assistant mayor.
“Caught playing hooky, busted.” You snicker and Joel scoffs.
Maria yells out Joel’s name again.
“Can you come back to town and help us with something? Thought you’d be at home seeing how it’s your day off today. I’ve been trying to call ya but nothing went through.” She yells.
The service here in the forest was awful compared to the town, a hard lesson you’ve learned quickly.
But you also don’t miss Maria’s comment.
Joel had today off. Yet he decided to stay a bit with you. That thought has teeth and you can’t stop their bite from sinking into your heart.
Joel groans but doesn't hesitate to head towards where the assistant mayor stands. Maria of course spots you and a wonderful grin lights up lovely her face.
“It’s good to see you.” She calls out.
“You too!” You reply back thankful your voice is level.
Joel glances over his shoulder to catch your eye.
“Good luck foragin’. Don’t eat any weird shit.”
You sputter out a squawk at his casual comment.
“Next time I see you, I’m giving you a wild horseradish!” You playfully snap the ridiculous reply before you can even stop yourself, but Joel thankfully rolls his eyes unbothered.
Maria’s eyes however flicker curiously between you and Joel. Too many emotions heat up your skin now. So bidding Joel and Maria a quick goodbye you stomp back into the forest to continue foraging.
Now along in the woods, your thoughts still think of Joel. The bag of parsnip seeds, the bandages, and the recipe, come to mind. You never once discussed any of it with him or him with you. It’s something you keep locked in your heart, just like today will be.
Soon the day melts into early twilight. You snag a couple of dandelions and a few other forageables before deciding to head home.
Joel’s farm house looms quietly still with no lights. You can’t bring yourself to open the gate to his farm and walk up to the house.
So instead you place a few dandelions along with a nice fresh large wild horseradish on top of the mailbox by his gate then head home.
Even when you unwind for the night, you mind still feels like it’s snagged on Joel Miller, still there with him foraging in the forest.
- ☼ -
The flower dance, as strange of a custom as it is, is rather ethereal. So many vivid floral arrangements decorate the space with dynamic colors and the air even smells fresh.
The flower dance honors the legacy of celebrating the final days of spring. But it also is a celebration of love blooming.
“It has roots dating back to fertility rituals.” Demetrius, ever the town scientist, told you while you were chatting with him and his wife.
He was right of course. The flower dance is the opportunity for someone to extend a hand of romantic feelings towards another. Those who hope to participate in the couples dance, or possibly win the crown of Flower Queen, are dressed in glorious attire. Soft light fabrics and flowers woven into crowns create a scene conjured out of a fairy’s kingdom.
Compared to the others in lovely attire with flowers in their hair, you didn’t even dress up or change out of your messy dirt covered jeans. And the only flowers in your hair are actually twigs and leaves from cleaning up more of your property.
With no need to worry about someone asking you to dance, you instead simply enjoy the various foods prepared for the occasion.
“Be careful, the salsa actually has a pretty good kick.” You’re about to go in for a second helping when a gentle accented voice floats out to you.
Besides you is a man with the kindest eyes you’ve seen. Faintly you recognize his face and can recall seeing him around town.
“Tommy Miller.” He reintroduces himself seeing your slight hesitation and your eyes go big.
“Oh, Maria’s husband!” You fully remember her introducing him to you. But now something else clicks.
He’s Joel’s brother.
“Yup.” He grins proud at his wife’s mention.
You apologize profusely for not remembering him sooner and with a kind understanding smile Tommy reassures you it’s fine.
“Been a busy first month for ya, I get it. You’re a tough cookie handlin’ it all.”
Even though his twang mirrors his brother’s, Tommy already radiates a much different energy than Joel. He’s warm in a way that reminds you of a soft summer day welcoming everyone with his vibrant energy.
You thank him earnestly. “The town’s been good to me.”
A part of you wants to add Joel has been good to you. Weeks ago, you would’ve laughed at just the idea of Joel Miller showing you an emotion other than annoyance. But now you and him seem to slowly be warming up to each other.
“Don’t go stealin’ all the good stuff, y’little shit.” Joel arrives with a gruff grumble of a voice and quickly nudges Tommy.
Yet his eyes remained glued on you.
You also seem to notice how striking Joel looks in the crisp light jean button up shirt he wears.
“Speak of the devil… was just about to ask our new farmer here if ya haven’t scared her away yet.” Tommy jokes.
Joel’s face flickers with a scowl fighting to form but he keeps himself surprisingly composed.
Guilt sinks in your gut. You know he’s hard to read and you even feel bad for thinking he’s mean. Because you’re learning fast Joel is earnest in his own way.
“Nah,” you tell Tommy, answering for yourself and Joel almost. “His sheep are actually scarier than he is.”
Tommy busts out laughing and you grin. Your eyes flicker to Joel but see he isn’t grinning. Instead Joel’s handsome aged face stares at you guarded and you can’t read the emotions shimmering in his eyes.
Shit.
You might have overstepped and upset him. So to physically stop yourself from saying anything else you take a bite out of the delicious cornbread on your plate, wave a weak goodbye to the Miller brothers, and scurry away.
Now alone under the shadow of one of the lovely cherry trees, you’re aware of how new you still are, a fresh bud still trying to foster roots in this new ground. You wonder how your gramps dealt with this every year.
Soon enough, the music starts and Mayor Lewis claps excited ready to begin the dance.
At least this will be over soon.
The couples slowly sway to the soft melody then rustling arrives at your side. Gently your eyes turn to the source and you almost collapse seeing Joel move in besides you.
His eyes though stay on the couples dancing among the blooms.
“Could’ve at least picked better music to dance to.” He mumbles bored.
Your lips press hard trying not to smile ridiculous and wide.
“Could you imagine if someone played the wrong song?” You whisper back. “Like, some heavy metal rock song suddenly started screaming out?”
Joel snorts, masks it with a few coughs, but you did it. You made him laugh.
Golden soaked triumph fills you and it feels like the first morning you woke up and found a sprout peeking up from the dark tilled soil.
He’s a complex man and you’re barely even scratching the surface of him. But it’s a tender start you want to continue kindling.
For all the commotion and production given to the festival, the dance only lasts a few moments. It’s over thankfully fast.
“Bit anticlimactic.” You mutter under your breath.
“Yeah it’s dumb.” Joel deadpans.
Your lips fight from letting out a laugh.
Everyone claps joyously at the couples concluding their dance. You wonder, even as silly as this is, if one day maybe you’ll dance with flowers in your hair. But you don’t give that thought too much attention. Just imaging yourself next spring already seems so far away.
“Headin’ home?” Joel asks, pulling you out of your thoughts.
You hum, narrowing your eyes at the gorgeous meadow.
“I’m kind of tempted to maybe see if I can steal some of the leftovers but yeah, I’m heading back.” You reply.
“Tell me which food you’re eyein’ and I’ll grab it. No one will tell me no.” He offers and you laugh.
“Tempting as that is, I’m just gonna go home.” You wish Joel a warm good night.
He continues walking alongside you.
Your heart jumps until you realize he lives in the same direction. The chatter from the festival still lingers in the air even while you walk further away from the meadow.
“How do you deal with that every year?” You ask with a sigh.
“Alcohol.” Joel dully answers and you snicker at his reply.
“Maybe one day you’ll be dancin’ out there.” Joel comments like he’s trying to continue the small talk. But the suggestion makes you skin itch for a reason you can’t pinpoint.
You only reply with a simple ‘maybe’ and a shrug.
“I’d pay a hundred bucks to see you dance though.” You joke, but also quickly imagine Joel a picture of softness with a flower behind his ear resting beautifully among his silver curls and it makes your knees weak.
Joel however rolls his eyes.
“Next year we’ll just sneak in and take over the music. See what happens.” You offer.
“Now that sounds like a plan.” Joel agrees gruffly.
It sounds like a promise.
You bid him good night until his eyebrows crinkle so classily grumpy Joel.
“Whadya doin’? Ain’t lettin’ ya walk home alone, sprout. Now come on.”
He continues walking as if nothing while your mind tries to recover being tilted on its axis for a bit.
Joel is walking you home.
And he called you sprout.
You want to cradle this new nickname so tenderly in your hands.
Joel quietly asks about your plans for the upcoming season, almost as if he’s trying to keep you focused.
To settle your flutter heart, you manage to ramble about the new incoming seeds you’ve heard about. You talk about your hopes of going to the beach more, not just to fish but to simply enjoy the ocean.
Among all that discussion, in a blink you’re back at your farm.
Instead of Joel rushing home, he lingers.
He checks your porch almost like he’s making sure the thing still stands.
“Hope one day to see that dang greenhouse up ‘n runnin.” He points to the broken greenhouse and you can’t help but sigh at the sight. You hope so too.
Then Joel moves to stand next to you on the land.
It feels different seeing him here.
Just a few weeks ago he was shouting every profanity known to man trying to fix your ancient water heater. He also glared at you the entire time.
Now he stands next to you suggesting on what to grow for the upcoming season.
“You could plant the tomatoes over on this side, give ‘em more shade to grow.”
Joel already reminds you of a back alley cat, one that hisses and refuses to let others near until he decides when to warm up to others. And, like a fresh new sprout, you want to soak up this warmth of him up.
“Also… Don’t forget to plant flowers.” He adds with a soft grumble.
“I won’t.” You grin impressed he remembered.
When you bid him goodnight and thank him again, you almost want to promise you’ll stop by with coffee tomorrow morning.
However that feels too much, like you might make the wrong move and spook him. But you do want to know if he makes it home okay. You can’t even bring yourself to ask him for his phone number.
So you watch Joel leave until your thoughts move fast and you blurt them out.
“Wait how will I know you made it back?”
Joel suddenly stops then glances back to you.
A very soft twinkle comes over his face and he gives you a crooked grin. It colors him with such a boyish expression. This new face of Joel feels sacred, special, and it steals your breath away.
“Hang outside for a bit. I’ll give ya sign, don’t worry.” He nods then melts into the darkness.
You stay frozen on the spot, not wanting to miss whatever it is. You wait, hoping he makes it back safe. Then out from the darkness, far down the path, you see it.
A light from Joel’s house blazes alive.
Then it flickers on and off, like someone flipping the switch a few times. The movement of it against the darkness even feels like a wave of some sorts.
You wish so badly to wave back.
Reassured that he’s home, you head back feeling as light as a feather.
Stepping onto your porch, something catches your eye.
Resting on the main railing barrier are a batch of tulips that were not there when you left.
Your heart jumps into your throat. You didn’t even see Joel place them there.
Delicately placed, the tulips so brilliantly colored sit warm and bright for you - the most beautiful end to your spring.
Though, in your heart, these blooms feel like something closer to a beginning.
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mrrharper · 2 days
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Waiting For The Roommate
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Max sat in the passenger seat of his roommate's truck, waiting for Buck, who needed to quickly come back to their dorm room. As he waited he took off his tank top, it was fuckin' hot inside. He rolled down the window to get some fresh inside the car.
As he stuck his head out the window to breathe in some fresh air he saw some nerd approach him. He was wearing a dark brown button-down shirt and had a stack of papers in his hand.
"Max, is that you?" The nerd asked, looking at him. A smile appeared on his face.
"uhhhhhhhh... dude, do i know ya?" He asked, convincing himself not to call the guy a loser or a nerd. Coach said he had to get better at dealing with strangers.
"Max, it's me - Michael. We went to high school together!" The other guy replied, clearly convinced that they knew each other. High school? Max's head was covered with a fog, he couldn't conjure up any specific memories from high school.
"you sure bro?"
"Damn, Max, we had like half our classes together!" The nerd was getting a bit frustrated for some reason. "We talked about going to the same uni, and so much more! And now you say you don't know me?"
Max tried to focus. High school, friends, classes, college. It felt like his brain was fighting against him, a thick fog covering everything. His thoughts began turning towards his next workout. Damn, he'll be doing arms and chest. Yea-- Holy shit, he knew that guy!
"oh fuck, mike, yeah, of course, how are you brah?" Max extended his hand for Mike to bump, but he just awkwardly looked at it. Max ignored it.
"Oh my god, for a moment I thought you weren't joking" A half-hearted laugh escaped Mike's mouth. Max just grinned. "I'm fine, settled into college life. Found a study group--" Mike continued talking but Max didn't register another word. He was this guy's good bro - apparently - but that didn't mean he would be able to tolerate that nerd bullshit. He was made for different things than studying - like workin' out with his best bro Buck.
"Anyway" Mike looked straight at Max, whose attention came back. "How was your first year. You look... like a different person!"
"what you mean bruh?" Max asked. What did that ner-- what did Mike mean? Different? He was always a badass jock.
"I mean, you're jacked! In high school you hated gym class, and here you are, buff and all."
"dude, am like, ya know, a real bro, dude. gotta be jacked as hell" He responded and flexed his right arm, his biceps moving and bulging under his skin.
"I mean, that's quite the change. Like, we kinda lost contact after the summer, and you didn't give any sign of life, and I thought... but you're here!" Mike was clearly excited and Max smiled. Wait, what was this dude's deal? He was textin' and talkin' with a nerd like that? Nah, this didn't make sense... where the fuck was Buck where he needed him!
"huhuhuhuhuhuh, yeah bruh" Max just chuckled like the dumb jock he was, he didn't know what to say. He shifted in his seat and scratched his armpit.
"Anyway" Mike went on "how was your first year in college? Were you able to get into that engineering program you've talked about?"
Engineeri-- what? "huhuhuh bro, are you high dude, i ain't here for some weird soundin' shit like that bro. am here to get drunk, work out and crush State, fuck yeah duhuhuhuh." Oh yeah, Max remembered the last game they played, State's lame ass defence couldn't stop the brute force of their offensive line. And the look on their faces when their WR1 tore a muscle in his leg... fuckin' priceless dude!
Mike was clearly not prepared for that answer, which Max found weird, cause he thought his jacked bod was proof enough that he wasn't a stupid nerd.
"Wait, so..." He was clearly confused "if you're not doing engineering then what is your major?"
"major?" Max had no idea what that guy meant... Major... what was a major... Coach talked to him about something like that... It was something along the lines of... "uhhhhh, general ed? dunno bro, never really been a guy to focus on shit."
"What, general education?" Mike seemed shocked. "But, like... I don't understand, Max, you... You said you wanted that, so that you could do a PhD... Why did you change your mind... Like, really, why did you change so much?!"
All that talk 'bout changes made Max's head spin a little bit. Like, what changes? He's been a fuckin' bro since he came here, got a room with Buck, cause before that-- his brain again began filling with fog, his thoughts slowing down to a halt, but not before he blurted out a response.
"duuuuude, like, bro, ive been a real bruh, like, forever dude, duuuuuuuh, like i got my bro Buck, and he got me to Coach, and uhhhhhhhhh, ya know, he worked on me and huhuhuh--" and his mind went blank, a dumb grin stuck on his face.
"What do you mean? A coach 'worked on' you? That sounds... concerning, you know that, right?" Mike adjusted his glasses and looked at Max, clearly concerned.
But Max... Max's brain had shut off. He was sitting in the passenger seat of his best bro Buck's truck, chuckling like a dumb idiot and drooling slightly.
"duhuhuhuhuhuh, duuuude... fuckin' hot today brah, gotta get that pump huhuhuhuh" He flexed his arm and touched his bulging biceps.
"Jesus, did they do something to you? Did you have some traumatic head injury?" Mike leaned on the car, looking inside the vehicle to see what was happening with Max. "God, did they brainwash you? You're a completely different person... and a dumb jock!"
It took a while for Max's fog-covered brain to register what the nerd said. And before he even began formulating a response Buck approached the car.
Buck was wearing a loose tank top that revealed his broad shoulders and giant guns, while also showing off his chest. His shorts, like second skin on his thick thighs, left nothing to imagination with his bulge clearly visible. He was a jock. An alpha. Max's best bro.
"duuude, ya won't believe the chick i saw while gettin' out of the dorm--" He started speaking as he opened the door on the driver's side, but then he noticed Mike standing by Max's window. "ey bruh, who's that loser?"
"huh?" Max turned to Buck, his grin disappearing and his his brow now furrowed. "i... dunno, bro..."
Buck and Mike looked at each other for a moment, the first one annoyed, the second slightly terrified.
"get away from the car" Buck barked as he sad down in front of the steering wheel.
"Wait, please, just a moment, you know what happened to Max? Pleas i just want to--"
"Go away, you fuckin' nerd" was the response Mike got. He took a step away from the car but didn't go away. Meanwhile Max realized what was happening. Some nerd was disturbing them and not listening to Buck's commands. And that wasn't the right thing to do. He turned his head to face the nerd.
"why you starin' at me, nerd" Max growled. His mind, completely covered by the fog, was now following Buck's lead. And Buck didn't like the nerd. So Max didn't like the nerd.
"Max, what... what happened?" Terror shifted into confusion as Mike tried to comprehend Max's sudden change in mood.
"oh, just fuck off, loser" Max responded and Buck took that as a sign. He turned the engine on and drove away, leaving Michael alone in the parking lot.
"uhhhhhh, do we know this guy?" Max asked a few minutes later. "that nerd form before?"
"nah, bro, of course not. we're real jocks, we're not gonna fraternize with fuckin' losers." Buck let our a low and dumb laugh. "by the way, tomorrow we're gonna get ya to Coach for a check up, just in case"
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cosmiiwrites · 1 day
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·˚ ༘₊· ͟͟͞͞꒰➳ lovebirds
·:¨༺ clingy!sinner! adam x clingy!sinner!fem!reader ༻¨:·
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⋆.ೃ࿔*:・ req/summary: PLS clingy!sinner!adam and clingy!fem!sinner!reader where Adam reincarnated in Hell and went to the Hotel for help and ended up falling in love with Reader and they just CAN’T STAY AWAY FROM EACH OTHER. Like, a concerning amount of PDA. Completely smitten, love-braindead, absolute lovebirds 😩. To the point where the other guests can’t stand them. If you don’t want to it’s okay! love your content 🥹 cw: fem!reader, cussing, fluff, partially suggestive a/n: accidently posted this in the middle of writing so i had to restart :') sorry this is also kind of late 😞 @callmerainman ty for the request <33 adam was fuming, he'd spawned in the place he swore he hated! he was stuck with all the filthy demons and sinners whom he'd used to slaughter. now he was one of them. disgusting, he thought. adam was left with one choice: the hazbin hotel. "fucking damn it." when he appeared outside the hotel’s doors, everyone (mostly vaggie) was urging charlie to turn him away. however, charlie being charlie, gave him a chance. why wouldnt she? this hotel was all about second chances!
adam definitely flipped vaggie off behind charlie’s back
at first, adam thought the hotel was boring; they had strict rules, most of which applied to him.
that is, until he set eyes on you. suddenly, he found himself actually wanting to participate in charlie’s “stupid therapy group shit” as adam would call it, because it meant that he’d be near you.
luckily for adam, you felt the same way. it wasn’t long before the both of you started dating.
and, oh boy, did you two make it clear.
you and adam were on each other 25/8, doesnt matter where or when.
wherever you were, adam was never far behind. (yes, that includes the bathroom. what did you expect?)
adam once tried convincing charlie to let you two just share a room, but she had to reject the idea. in the nicest way possible, of course.
“listen, adam, i LOVE how you and (name) are so close! but, um, i’d prefer if you two stayed in your separate rooms. everyone knows how… passionate you are together.”
poor charlie.
husk has had to kick you two out of the bar from time to time, after catching you with adam’s tongue down your throat in front of him. even angel dust, whose whole personality is being horny, gets grossed out by the both of you sometimes.
not to mention the PDA. adam had his hands on you. all. the. time. most of the time, he’d have his hand snaked around your waist while walking. or when sitting down, adam would have you on his lap.
if he feels like someone is talking to you for too long, he’d start making out with you on the spot to get them to walk away, partially traumatized.
you and adam are also embarrassingly cheesy. this includes nicknames.
charlie’s tried to sit you both down to talk about your behavior, but it was awkward when adam had you sat down on his lap, rubbing teasing circles on your thigh. she’d tried talking but her words were cut off by the sounds of your giggles. with a sigh, she gave up and let you two be.
———————————————————————
“i love you more!” you giggled, sitting on adam’s lap as you playfully pinched his cheek.
“no, i love YOU more,”
“nuh uh, i love—“
“OH MY FUCKING GOD. SHUT THE FUCK UP,” yeah, vaggie’s so done with you guys.
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jujutsubaby · 2 days
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🫧 skin care daddy 🫧
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☆ pairing: satoru gojo x afab!reader ☆ summary: your skin's been breaking out recently and you're stressed at work and you have your sister's wedding to attend in a week. according to the internet, this is the best spa in town, and you're lowkey desperate at this point...it can't be that bad right? ☆ tags: modern au ☆ warnings: penetrative sex, unprotected sex, oral sex (f!recieving), facial, dirty talk, fingering, flicking the bean?? idk ☆ a/n: guys i swear i am cooking in the kitchen with the asks from my follower event AND other shit OK!! sorry for the wait on everything but here is a little crumb bc i love u all!! i was feeling unhinged bc i saw two things: 1) a spa called skin care daddy and 2) a post or one shot where the reader got a facial from gojo and it cleared her skin. idk i just felt inspired to make this bc it felt the universe was asking me to. not proofread some plot with corn u know the vibes babes xx ☆ word count: 7k+
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"sorry, we're all booked for this weekend and the next. we usually recommend that our customers book 3 weeks in advance for our services at the ritz carlton luxury spa." the lady on the other end of the line was objectively speaking very politely, but you were far too frustrated with your situation to notice.
"great, yeah, no, thanks." you say quickly, hanging up the phone and groaning into your pillow.
"no luck at the ritz?" you turn to face your best friend, nobara.
"they're all booked, what a surprise!" you say sarcastically, your voice still slightly muffled by the pillow.
"i mean, c'mon, y/n. your face is not that bad..." nobara tries and deeply fails to comfort you, making you chuckle half heartedly.
you get up from your bed and walk over to the full body mirror of your closet in order to get up close and personal with your face. your fingers stretch on the skin around your breakouts as you study them with determination, as if just willing them to be gone will do the trick. it doesn't.
"it's bad enough that all the aunties will say something snarky to me all day."
you're usually one to always follow through on your skincare routine, am and pm, and watch what you eat carefully so that you don't get breakouts. but you recently went through a rough patch (read: a hellish period) and your face took the brunt of the damage. it wasn't your fault you were having massive cramps and craved hot cheetos the entire week (it was so worth it) but now, a week before your sister's wedding, you're facing the consequences.
you sigh. the ritz was the fifth place you guys called that didn't have any space for an all day facial, but you couldn't run out of hope. back to the drawing board.
you open up your laptop and get back to searching on google maps, as nobara does the same thing. you're grateful she's helping you out during your, albeit, dumb crisis, but what are girl friendships for? a spa you've never heard of before suddenly catches your eye and you zoom in. skin care daddy? you read the finer print underneath it. best day spa in tokyo.
you snort. best day spa in tokyo my ass. if it really was the best day spa in tokyo, why have you never heard of it?
nobara laughs, almost on cue. "wait, dude, are you seeing this spa?" she turns her phone around and you see she's also looking at skin care daddy. "this has to be a joke, right? no way would they be allowed to open up a spa named that, right?"
"ohmygod, i was just looking at that!" you say excitedly. "it literally sounds like a sex bot made it for unsuspecting horny losers to click on and get like, a crazy virus." you both laugh at how ridiculous this place sounds.
nobara's laugh almost abruptly stops as she scrolls down the place. "wait, stop. this place has like...over ten thousand reviews and a 4.9 star rating..."
you immediately click on the place and take a closer look at the reviews and ratings and see she's right. "i don't think i've ever seen a place have this many reviews with consistent ratings?" your brows scrunch as you read aloud some of the top reviews.
"this spa has given me the some of the best facials of my life. i always come to this spa whenever i'm in the area, and the people working there are obsessed with taking care of their customers. 10/10" you're baffled by the review sounding so...weird but you think nothing of it. you make a mental note that you are kinda desperately looking for a miracle facial to help with your breakouts, so maybe you shouldn't count this place out just yet.
nobara half heartedly scoffs as she reads the next one. "i've had chronic acne and back pain for years until i saw someone from here who made me feel soo good. you'll be coming here all the time once you go. maybe even multiple times a day."
"how good can this place be if you have to go multiple times to make sure your spa treatment worked?" you say, rolling your eyes at these reviews. "these can't be real right?"
"they sound incentivized or like someone paid them to write it or somethin'" nobara surmises.
"maybe it's a cult or something," you say, causing both of you to double over in laughter.
"a cult disguised as a spa is a bit too insane, even for tokyo." nobara says as she scrolls through and skims more reviews. "aren't you looking for a facial anyway? everyone's saying they're really good here...you know...despite the..." she gestures with her hands the reviews on her phone.
"ugh, am i for real that desperate for clear skin that i'm willing to go to a shady ass day spa?" you roll on to your back on your bed and stare at the ceiling, contemplating.
"can't be that shady if it's ten thousand reviews. say what you want but that's a lot of reviews to pay money for."
nobara has a point. you grab your laptop and try to look for a link to their website and see they don't have a website. interesting. not a red flag but just interesting. maybe i have to call for bookings? you search for a phone number, but fail to find one.
"wait, are you able to find any contact for this spa?" you ask noabra and you see her squinting her eyes at the phone.
"no i wasn't but i saw a review that basically said this spa is a walk-in type of deal?"
"it's a walk-in but has thousands of reviews? how does that even work? people are probably waiting years in line to get in?"
"dunno," nobara shrugs, and puts her phone back in her pocket. "maybe it's like a 'if-you-know-you-know' type of thing so it's like popular through word of mouth of somethin'"
damn. even more shady, then. you chew on your lip and stare at the ceiling again, trying to imagine all the things your aunties will say to you at the wedding.
"27 and still unmarried? shame."
"oh, you really need to watch your diet, the breakouts will never go away otherwise."
"clear skin is the first step to find a man who will desire you, y/n."
you feel like your skin is burning thinking about the so-called "advice" you're likely to receive at the wedding. normally you wouldn't care, but your hormones have been kind of out of wack with the new birth control you started recently, and you're not sure if you can really take any form of bullshit other than your sister's this weekend.
your thoughts are interrupted by nobara getting up from your chair. "alright, i'm off to work. need a ride to skin care daddy?"
"yeah, actually," you say as you slowly get out of your bed and change our of your pajamas.
"wait, what?!" nobara says with wide eyes. "i was actually joking when i said that. are you seriously gonna go? y/n, i dunno about this one..."
"c'mon! it's like you said, it's weird but it's not necessarily shady..." you say, mostly trying to convince yourself as you put on a pair of your favorite lazy girl black flared yoga pants.
nobara seems to consider it for a moment before responding. "kay, fine. but if i take you there and it's some abandoned warehouse-"
"then we'll drive away. no way in hell i'm about to die for this place." you assure nobara, putting her at ease.
you quickly don a thrifted gray hoodie and put your hair up in a messy bun. you don't care to put on any makeup, since you're probably gonna have to take it off anyway. if the day spa isn't shady and in an abandoned warehouse.
you quickly grab your keys and wallet before gesturing to nobara to leave. she sighs, looking at her phone one more time.
"fuck it, let's go before i change my mind."
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"okay it says it's just right around the corn-"
"OH MY GOD?!" you're unable to hold back your disbelief as nobara took the corner to, what you think, might the chicest and prettiest boutique you've ever laid eyes on. the front was adorned with a gorgeous light blue awning with european style bell-shaped pendant lights making it almost glow during the day time.
"what the hell...ain't no way..." noabra is at a loss for words for how fancy it looks. "they have the money to rent out a place like this but no website?"
"or have a phone number." you mumble as you open nobara's car door. you turn around and give her a quick wave. she tells you to give her a call and tell her how it is after and you promise to do so. as nobara drives off, all the skepticism evaporates from your body looking at the dainty and cute decor all over the place.
you walk in to a fairly large lobby, with a desk in the middle and waiting chairs surrounding it. the calming scent of lavender, green tea, and patchouli hits your nose, and your guard immediately drops; the aroma relaxes you almost instantly.
you look around and are surprised to see only two other women in the waiting chairs on their phone. one of them seemed older, kind of like a mother, and the other seemed to be your age, but far more demure.
"hey, there! welcome to skin care daddy! we're determined to take care of you all your needs, no matter what! how can i help you today?" your head whips around to the guy sitting at the reception desk, and you feel a bit embarrassed; he must've noticed how lost you looked here, and you force yourself to straighten up and regain your composure as you slowly walk to the front desk. you take a closer at the guy with shaggy black hair sitting in the chair in front of you.
"hi..." you squint to see the faint print on his name badge. "yuta".
"yup! that's me!" he chirps. you know he probably has to exaggerate his good mood for the sake of the job but it kind of irks you. "what can i do for you today, miss?"
"yeah, uhh...what services do you guys offer? i tried looking online but you guys didn't have a website and..." your wandering eyes can't help but look around skeptically around the front desk and the doors on either side of the lobby.
"well, we offer whatever you need, miss. just tell us what you're looking for and we'll have it. i guarantee it."
"okay, well. my sister's getting married next weekend and..." you gesture to your face. "my life has been all sorts of stressful and hormonal so honestly, i'm just looking for something that can help me feel refreshed-"
you're interrupted by someone entering in from the right side of the lobby door. it's a woman who, you must say, looks glowing. her skin is bright and she quite looks like she's almost levitating. guiding her out of the spa is a young man, around your age, with blond hair and round glasses. he's unbelievably built, with strong hands rubbing her back softly and a chiseled jaw. he's wearing what you think is the uniform of this place: white dress shirt with the top two buttons undone and black slacks.
your breath gets caught in your throat momentarily. no fucking way. this guy works here? he's so fucking...hot. you have to force your eyes to tear away from him as you try your hardest to focus back on your conversation with yuta.
yuta chuckles as he follows your gaze. "ah, yes, mr. nanami is a customer favorite esthetician here. anyway, seems like you're going through a rough time and you came to the perfect place! normally, i would recommend the oxygen facial, but since you said you have a wedding..." yuta types something on the computer for a bit. "personally, i would recommend the full body tokyo special."
you're not entirely what an oxygen facial is, nor what the tokyo special is, and you feel even more stupid asking this guy who seems to be in college for more information.
"um, sorry, what's a full body tokyo special? i think i just need a really good facial."
"oh no worries, miss. i apologize. the full body tokyo special consists of a hands-on full body aromatherapy massage and our famous milkbomb facial, which'll do wonders for your skin." he winks at you. why did he wink at you?
you're unable to think about whether or not you even wanna do anything here when a group of men barge in through the left door of the lobby, laughing loudly, before lowering their voices.
one of the men is a dark haired man, seemingly a little older than the other two and yourself, but also very much ripped just like mr. nanami. you tried not to stare at the skin tight black shirt he wore that attenuated his pecs but miserably failed. he took the quickest glance at you and gave the faintest smile, revealing a slight scar on the left side of his lip. a scar that makes him sexier? you've gotta be kidding me. you follow his gaze to the older woman you saw sitting here when you came in, who know looks completely enamored by the man.
"there's my favorite mama," the man coos, holding an arm out for her as she skipped to him. he leads her to the other door, and you could hear them giggling and talking, as if this wasn't the first time they've seen each other.
"aight, see ya later, man." the other dark haired man said to his friend, before making eye contact with you, and then giving a slight smirk to yuta. he heads straight to the demure girl you saw when you walked in, and holds his hand out to her and she blushes and grabs it.
"th-thanks for seeing me again, geto-san." the girl says so softly that you have to strain your ears to listen.
"i told you to call me suguru..." you hear him joke as they disappear behind the door.
"like what you see?" you turn your head to the last guy, who now is far too close for your liking. you take a small step back, which makes him chuckle.
"yuta-kun! who do we have here?" the man asks boisterously. despite being indoors, he's wearing dark circled sunglasses. what a douche.
"oh, hey gojo-sensei. this is..." yuta looks at you, waiting for you to say your name.
"y/n." you say a bit too late, still trying to process the barrage of attractive men that just showed up all at once and what they had to do with the spa.
yuta starts filling in the man about what you were looking for, as you take in the man who's intently listening to him. he has white hair, and is wearing the same uniform as mr. nanami was, with three buttons undone and his hair slightly disheveled. he's also really tall. like really tall. like he towers over you easily tall. but also, just as well built like everyone else.
what is this place? you knew men could work in salons and parlors and spas, but this place seemed to be exclusively run by them. and not just any men, really attractive men. and what's worse is that you were not complaining. sure, it's a bit weird but there's really no other choice for you at this point.
"ahh, the tokyo special, huh?" he says, turning at you and giving you a bright smile which you suspect he gives to everyone who comes in here. "nice choice."
"he's the one who chose it, and i'm not even sure if i want it." you say, pointing to yuta, and trying your hardest to stand your ground. you have to really make sure this spa treatment is actually gonna help and not just a scam for your money.
"well, he chose right. i've never seen you here before, so you must be new here, right?" you nod, suddenly feeling really small and embarrassed about your attitude before. god, you're never one to behave badly in front of service workers. the hormones are really doing a number on your mood. maybe you could benefit from this "tokyo special".
he leans down to meet your eyes and takes off his sunglasses, and you’re face to face with the most gorgeous ocean blue eyes you've ever seen. through an almost hypnotic effect, you feel much calmer than you did before, and more trusting of him. "well, lucky for you, i've got an opening right now. i'll help you feel right at home." he gives you a wink, and you can't help but feel there's some other hidden meaning behind what he says.
"umm...well..." you say, holding on to the thin strings of your resolve.
"gojo-sensei is the best masseuse and esthetician here, especially for first timers like yourself, miss y/n. i guarantee you'll leave the establishment more than satisfied with his work." yuta assures you with a smile.
and with that, your resolve completely dissolves and you nod and hand him your credit card and he takes the information. gojo touches the small of your back ever so slightly, and you hope he doesn't feel you shiver at his touch.
"he just loves kissing up to me so he can get a full time job here after college. i'm his favorite cousin, after all." he says, making you giggle as you walk through the two panel doors into the spa.
"thanks for taking me in during your opening, mr. gojo." you say politely, feeling grateful as he leads you down the corridor of the neat, clean, and minimally decorated hallway.
"i think you're gonna be the one taking me in," gojo mumbles under his breath while opening the door to a room that looked like a doctor's office. a single lavender massage table greets you with small cabinets on either side.
you're unable to catch what he said. "what? did you say something?"
"i said call me satoru. no need to get so formal with me, i'm just some dude who works here." he chuckles. he locks the door as you sit up on the massage table awkwardly, unsure of how you should be positioning yourself or what exactly he was planning.
gojo goes to the corner and pulls out a fluffy white bathrobe and hands it to you. you're blown away by how soft it feels in your hands -- luxury at it's finest, you guess.
"okay, i just have a quick questionnaire i need you to fill out, probably will take around a minute," he says, as he grabs a clipboard with a pen attached to it from another drawer and takes a seat on a padded lab stool. he rolls closer to you until his long slender legs are almost touching your calves.
"alrighty here...okay, first question…” the questions gojo reads off are normal enough, with various clauses consenting to the spa treatment, confirming your age, and so forth. they don’t start getting weird until later. “ok last three, we’re almost done.” you notice a shit-eating grin on his face as he scribbles your answer to the previous question. “okay, are you a virgin?”
“what?!” 
“are you a virg-”
“i heard you the first time. what kinda question is that? that’s so invasive, what the hell are you play-” you’re ready to give an entire speech to this guy about how inappropriate and irrelevant the question is. 
“it’s fine if you don’t wanna answer it, i just can’t continue the treatment if you don’t.” gojo says this so simply and nonchalantly, as if the question was about your favorite color, and not an intimate detail about your sexuality. 
“okay, fine. not a virgin.” you cross your hands in irritation. 
“not…a...virgin…” you hear him say under his breath as he scribbles something you cannot see on his clipboard. you try leaning forward to see what he’s writing (and if there really was a question like that on the questionnaire but he quickly pulls it closer to his chest, giving you a teasing smirk. “are you on birth control?”
“y-yes?” 
“good to know. last question: got any STDs i need to know about?”
oh, for fuck’s sake. this is ridiculous. does he think you’ve never been to a spa before? the usual thai place you go to never asks this many questions. “do you have any STDs i need to worry about? what is this? 20 questions?”
“you can ask them to me back, i’d be happy to answer them.” he says calmly with a coy smile. “in fact, i’ll answer them right now. no, no, and no.”
you sign in defeat. “no for me too.” maybe this is what happens when a place has like, ten thousand 5 star reviews on google maps. they just ask the weirdest questions. there’s a small voice berating yourself for folding so easily regarding his questions, but whatever. you’re ready to get this treatment over with. 
“okay, take off all your clothes and wear the bathrobe. do you want me to step outside?”
what the hell kinda question is that? of course, he’s supposed to step outside? “um, yeah?” you say it almost obviously, not feeling bad about the attitude that’s coming out of you. 
gojo raises his hand in surrender. “sorry, just askin’...” he grabs his clipboard and steps out of the room, saying he’ll be back in five minutes for the warm up massage. you quickly undress yourself. you have a feeling he’s the type to come in within seconds of knocking on the door without checking to see if you’re decent. you’re unsure where to place your clothes other than the table next to the cabinet so you neatly fold them, hiding your underwear and bra within the folds of your yoga pants and sweatshirt. 
just as promised, gojo shows up five minutes later with one knock before welcoming himself in. he’s holding a dark colored glass bottle filled with a calming essential oil for massaging, and turns on the diffuser in the room. 
“thanks for undressing,” he says, looking at the neatly folded pile of clothes on the counter. “alright, here’s how this is gonna go. i’m gonna give you a nice full body massage to loosen your muscles up, and then we do the facial last, sound good, princess?” 
your skin tingles at him calling you that nickname, but you ignore it. there’s no way i can let my mind wander like that when he’s giving me a massage. you nod your head in agreement, and lay on your back slowly, fidgeting with the ends of  your bathrobe so that you’re not totally exposed to him. gojo slowly hovers his hands over you and lightly touches your stomach, patting it to get your attention, but it causes you suck in a breath a bit too loudly. 
“gotta go on your stomach for me for this one,” he says, urging you to flip around. “gonna undo this, okay?” he tugs at the knot you made on your bathrobe and you nod. he slowly undoes it, and you feel exposed as your breasts peek out through the sides. you cross your legs almost immediately, feeling incredibly exposed in front of a fully clothed gojo. 
you quickly turn on your stomach before he has a chance to take in your body. you feel his cold fingers slowly expose your back, as he stops right before the hump of your ass. you hear him squeezing out some of the oil and warming it up in his hands as he gets to work on your back. 
you suck in a sharp breath between your teeth as his cold fingers explore the knots on your back. 
“cold isn’t it? you’ll get used to my fingers, promise,” he says sweetly, as he hits a spot on your back that’s been particularly bothering you as of late. it’s too late when you let out a moan, and you hear him chuckle. “hit the right spot, didn’t i?”
he continues to undo the knot on your back, and moan back a breathy affirmation as you continue to try (and fail) to hold back your noises. “f-fuck, gojo, that feels s-so good…” you say in between his movements. 
you feel his hot breath in your ear. “told ya to call me satoru, don’t forget it next time, princess.” this time, the nickname goes straight to your pussy. it’s hard to cross your legs when you’re on your stomach and feeling delirious with the pleasure that came from the pressure of his slender fingers. 
unbeknownst you, your soft moans are slowly making their way down to gojo’s member, as he gets harder by the second. he doesn’t want to make it so obvious just yet – he’s just getting start after all. he can’t just blow his load this close into the session, but you’re sure as hell giving him a run for his money. 
“feel good?” you moan in response. gojo slowly inches his fingers down closer and closer to your ass, until it reaches the hem of your bathrobe covering it. “gonna move this down so i can do your legs, yeah?”
gojo will admit, he was a bit too excited to see your ass as he removed your bathrobe down before you could give a proper “yes” but it didn’t matter when you’re soft breaths were giving him the answer he needed. it takes everything in him to not knead the rounds of your perfect ass (he swears your cheeks were made for his hands) and move straight to your calves. 
he slowly massages the soles of your feet and calves with the oil as he moves closer to your thighs, all while relishing in your sweet moans. once he’s at your thighs, the real fun begins. gojo knows this routine like the back of his hands. 
you hear him sigh in confusion. “is everything okay?” you turn your head slightly to see him. 
“sorry about this princess, but you’re gonna have to spread your legs a little bit for me. it’s hard to get every inch of you warmed up, otherwise.”
you obey him almost too easily, and shift your thighs so that there’s more room for him to touch with his fingers. gojo’s hands reach up to slightly cup your ass, before his thumbs slowly slide into your inner thigh, lightly massaging you.
your breaths are getting shallower and louder, and you pray he doesn't go any closer to your pussy so he doesn’t see how soaked you are. you’ve never had a massage like this before, but you also don’t want him to stop. 
gojo’s fingers play with the space of your inner thigh before he spreads you apart, exposing you. you breath catches in your throat, and he performs the next part of his act. 
“we’ve got a pretty unconventional way of massaging our clients, princess.” you hear his voice straining. “gotta make sure you’re relaxed everywhere, but you gotta let me take care of you. think you can do that? all you have to do is relax, and let daddy do everything for you.” you can hear the lust dripping from his voice, but to be honest, you couldn’t give a shit at this point. 
“y-yeah, please, satoru, whatever you want. please, i just…i just feel so good right now,” you say, your eyes shut tight, and your hips practically squirming under his touch. you think you might go insane if he doesn’t touch you there in the next second. 
hook, line, and sinker. who’s gojo to deny your request? he graduated top of his class at his cosmetology and esthetician university, after all. his fingers glide almost too easily between your folds as he starts playing with your throbbing core. he can feel how needy your pussy is for his hands as he spreads your slick all over your core. 
the pleasure immediately gets caught in the pillow that muffles your moans. fuck, so this is what all the reviews were talking about. you feel his fingertips dancing around your clit and you want to shout at him to pay attention to it. 
“s-satoru~ p-please…i need you right there…” you say in between your moans. 
“where? here?” gojo’s finger taps your clit lightly, and it makes your entire body twitch with pleasure. he has to press down on the small of your back to keep you place as his fingers rub circles around your bundle of nerves, making you whimper. you unconsciously grind your hips against his fingers, trying to get close to your release. 
“need a better angle. face down, ass up.” gojo commands, and your body conforms to his words. you prop your lower body up with your knees while your face is sideways against the head of the massage table. he uses this now better angle to really rub his fingers into your folds and bundle of nerves, sending electricity throughout your body. you feel the dam building up inside you and threatening to break. 
“satoru~ i’m-i’m getting c-close…ah~” you hands grip on to the sides of the massage table as you brace for the earth shattering orgasm to rip through you, and with gojo’s deft fingers, you’re on cloud nine in no time. 
your body slumps back down and your eyes roll back as the vibrations of your release still radiate through your body. you hear  your pulse pumping through your head as you try to catch you breath, but you feel gojo’s now warm hands flip you on your back, and his face inches from yours. 
“you took that so well, princess. we’re not done, yet. there’s still another part of your body that needs to warm up.” you don’t have time to process what he means as he inserts two fingers into his mouth and then deep inside your entrance. your gasp is muffled by his mouth connecting to yours, hard, teeth and all. his fingers are long, and they easily find your sensitive g-spot as they curl upwards and bully your internal bundle of nerves. it’s quite embarrassing how quickly you’re ready for another release, and how hungry your entrance was for his finger, practically sucking them in and clenching around them immediately. 
“f-fuck~ i’m about to-” you don’t get to finish your sentence, as another orgasm rips through your body. gojo kisses you again to block your moans, and your hands wrap around his neck to pull him even closer to you. he playfully bites on your lower lip as you ride out your release on his fingers. 
gojo’s kisses turn into soft quick pecks as your breathing steadies and your eyes can focus again. “we’re not done yet,” he teases, slowly taking his slick coated fingers out of you. 
you don’t even have the energy to respond back as he flips you on you back. through heavy eyes, you look back up at him, biting back a moan as he restarts rubbing circles on your extremely sensitive clit. he needs to take off his shirt and fuck you already. 
“need something?” gojo teases, sensing your neediness from just your eyes. 
“take off your shirt, dumbass.” you say through gritted teeth. 
“try again.” he presses harder on your clit, and you let out an unsanctioned yelp through your teeth. 
“f-fuck~ please take off your shirt, dumbass.”
he smiles. “well, if you insist…” he rolls his eyes, feigning inconvenience, but the slowly growing tent in his pants says otherwise. gojo unbuttons his shirt, revealing a perfectly sculpted torso. now this is just unfair. 
“geez, my eyes are up here.” he teases, smirking at you as you quickly meet his eyes and feel your face flush. he unbuckles his belt and you slowly sit up from the massage table. you’re overcome with the urge to touch him, everywhere. you hook your finger to the belt loop of his pants and pull him closer to you. 
gojo smirks as he wraps his arms around hips and leans down to kiss you deeply. you feel your core ache for his touch again as his tongue explores your mouth again. you trace his perfectly sculpted torso, the indents of his abs slightly sweaty to your touch. your hands slowly make their way to the zipper of his slacks, but gojo immediately grabs your wrist to stop you from taking them fully off. 
“not just yet…” he murmurs in between kisses. while his lips are still locked on you, he slowly pushes your body back on the massage table and starts kissing down your bare stomach, the measly bathrobe long since discarded somewhere on the floor. gojo leaves small wet kisses along your body until he reaches your inner thighs. 
you suck in a breath as you involuntarily spread your legs for him, earning an enthusiastic hum from gojo, who’s still continuing to leave a trail of kisses that are inching closer and closer to where you need his mouth to be the most. “p-please~” you moan, your eyes closed in bliss. 
“please what, princess? use your words,” gojo coos, coming face to face with your soaking wet core. he blows on the sensitive bundle of nerves, causing your legs to twitch.
you can’t stand his fucking teasing but you need to be eaten out, so bad. “f-fuck y-you, gojo~” you say, pushing your core up to his face, trying to aim for his mouth before he easily pushes your hips back on the table. you hear him tsk in disapproval, and tears welling up in your eyes in desperation. “please, your tongue…inside me…please~” you whimper weakly. 
“since you begged so nicely…” gojo says before he immediately plunges his tongue inside you, almost making you scream. his tongue expertly explores your folds and sucks on your clit, making you inadvertently grind on his face. “y’taste so delicious, princess,” he says between licks as he eats you out like it’s the last pussy on earth. 
his ministrations with his tongue has you teetering on the edge in record time, and you’re threatening to spill within minutes of him eating you out. as the third wave of pleasure washes over you, you don’t have the energy in you to ask for permission as you feel your body tingle in the aftermath of it. you think you made a mess all over the massage table and gojo’s face, but you don’t have it in you to care as your eyes roll back. 
you feel gojo unbuckle his belt and take off his slack and underwear, exposing his hard member in his hands. you can see the precum leaking out the tip as you weakly lean on your elbows to prop yourself up. 
“see, princess, all those questions did have a reason after all…” he says in between breaths as he strokes himself, looking at your naked glistening body. you spread your legs further in anticipation of feeling him. “but there you were, being such a fuckin’ brat about answering them…” gojo says, eyebrows furrowing as he brings his tip closer to your core and you bite your lip in anticipation. 
“guess you better fuck the attitude outta me, then?” you say, looking up at him through heavy lidded eyes filled with mindless lust. you don’t even care about the consequences or who hears or even if you get your facial – you just need him. every part of your body craved him. 
gojo wastes no time at your suggestion, his tip entering you as you let out a lecherous moan. you feel the initial pain of his larger than average member tearing your tight entrance apart, and bite back a moan. gojo grits his teeth as he lets out a steady throaty groan. 
“fuck, princess. so fuckin’ tight. sure you’re not a virgin?” 
“s’too much satoru, y-you’re huge…ahh~” 
“too bad, princess.” he says, surprising you as he starts thrusting agonizingly slowly into you, bottoming out and effectively reaching the sensitive spot inside you. pain slowly turns into pleasure as you indulge in the feeling of your g-spot getting kissed by his member – the spot that you can never reach by yourself using your own fingers.  
“f-faster, please~” you urge gojo, and he obliges almost immediately, quickening his pace. he bullies your sloppy and wet core, as he watches your titties bounce with every thrust. unlike most people his age, it’s times like this where gojo realizes he really fucking loves his job. 
he reaches out and gives your titties a rough squeeze while he remains unrelenting in his pace. he feels your pussy clench around him, and he knows you’re close, and if he’s being honest, so is he. but he cannot cum just yet, and definitely not before you do. gojo abandons your titties and slides down his fingers to your clit as he starts rubbing inelegant circles around it, getting you closer and closer to the edge. 
you feel the dam breaking once again as the combination of him rubbing and fucking you comes to a climax. the orgasm travels to every corner of your body, as you see stars in your vision while gojo fucks your brains out. you hold on to his shoulders to steady yourself. based on how sloppily gojo is getting, you can tell he’s about to get close, too. you’re about to brace for him to finish inside you, when he abruptly pulls out, earning him a confused look from you. 
“lay down,” he commands more than asks, as he hastily pushes your chest down on the massage table. your sweaty skin sticks to the faux leather, but you don’t pay attention as he moves to the side of your face, holding his soaked member near it. 
gojo starts stroking his throbbing leaking member sensually, and you innately open your mouth and stick your tongue out. so this is the facial? the dots connected in your head at the same time gojo’s ropes of warm cum decorated your face – chin, cheeks, mouth, and all. you hear gojo’s throaty groans as he finishes on you and make sure not a single drop that gets on or near mouth gets wasted, swallowing pridefully. 
gojo leans closer to your ear as he catches his breath from his climax. “that’s the milkbomb facial,” he says cheekily, and you can’t help but giggle. you both take a couple more seconds to catch your breath. you watch gojo as he puts on his pants and tucks in his shirt, looking like he didn’t just fuck the shit out of you. he runs his fingers through his hair quickly as he goes to the counter and pulls out a warm eucalyptus towel as he takes his time to gently wipe your face and body. 
“that was fun,” you murmur, looking at the ceiling, finally understanding what the reviews you read about this earlier place meant. you definitely came here, multiple times in one day for sure. 
gojo chuckles as he goes over to wash his hands and you notice his forearms are glistening with your release. “that’s why we’re the best spa out here, princess.”
you notice your legs shaking slightly, but you manage to hop off the massage table, slightly dazed. gojo notices and helps you get on your feet and put on your clothes. the entire activity is soft and gentle compared to how he was just a couple minutes before. 
everything that you both have done in the past hour finally dawns on you, and you suddenly feel very shy despite whatever the contrary happened on the massage table. it’s so awkward now, like, what do you guys even talk about now? does he do this to everyone? is this their entire schtick?
“do you…do this with all your clients?” you whisper to him as you follow him out into the hallway to the exit. you cross your hands tightly to your chest, as if it’s shrouding you from other people finding out what happened in the room behind you. 
“ah, i’m not one to kiss and tell.” gojo puts his hands in his pockets and glances back at you, giving you a quick wink as you follow behind him, trying to keep up with him as he turns corners.s
“oh, so you do do this everyone, huh?” you challenge, your shyness slowly melting away with gojo’s playful tone.. 
“did you enjoy it?”
a pause from you.. “yes.”
“then don’t worry about it, kitten.” gojo pauses before he opens the door and turns to you. “listen, i wouldn’t mind if you came here again for the tokyo special, you know. i’ll even give you a discount, too.” he says earnestly. 
you let out a giggle. “oh? a discount?”
“yeah, the tight pussy discount.”
“shut up!” you say, and you playfully smack his shoulder, and you both laugh. 
“so… is that a yes? i’ll see you next week?” 
you bite your lip. “maybe, i dunno.” you give him a wink before opening the door, and you both know fully well that you’ll be back on the massage table again in no time with gojo pounding into you. 
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needless to say, gojo wasn’t lying when he said they were the best spa in town because by the time your sister’s wedding came around, your face was quite literally glowing. 
“wow! y/n – you’re just looking so radiant today! what’s your secret?” an auntie who’s name you cannot remember gleams, looking at you. 
you smirk, and try to hold back the heat from flushing your cheeks. “oh, just a really good facial,” you say. technically, you’re being honest, right?
“jesus, dude. is this all from skin care daddy?” nobara says, as the tenth person from the wedding compliments your skin. 
“you have no idea. they really know what they’re doing.” you say nonchalantly. you pull out your phone and text a recently saved number. 
you: got any slots for a tokyo special tomorrow?
within minutes you get a response: 
gojo: u know i do babygirl. btw a new guy just joined our spa. hope it’s cool sukuna joins to observe  😈
310 notes · View notes
ajortga · 1 day
Text
for i can't help falling in love with you
pairing: vada cavell x fem reader
summary: not only are you new and in almost all of vada's classes, but the more you get to know each other, the more you hang out. she starts to think maybe your friendship is more than what she thought it was, she's feeling something she knows that you shouldn't feel for a friend.
word count: 10.1k+
a/n: this is the longest fic i've ever written, this is fluffy and sweet, spent way too long on it but nonetheless, not regretful!
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based off a request! this is for my vada <3ers
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R transfers, V sees her almost all the time and eventually starts falling for R, V then embarrassingly asks R out for dinner! Just plainly puppy love, literally not much but I find these types of tropes sooo comforting, u can change some up a bit!!
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It’s loud, bustling, chaotic every single day in the cafeteria.
As soon as the bell rings around the hallways and into the classrooms for lunch break, everyone slams into each other and sprints to the front of the lunch line. Vada even remembers while she walked with Nick some boy tripped in thin air and fell to the floor. She couldn’t help but laugh a little. That was until Nick and her found out he had to get stitches to repair his nose. 
She laughed even harder, she couldn’t help it.
Vada slurped her slushy as she kicked her feet, talking with Nick who was drinking an iced latte.
“In a sense, slurpees are better than coffee. You don’t have to immediately shit diarrhea as soon as you plop on the toilet.”
He agrees, rolling his eyes, “Yeah but who would want slushies every day? They stain your mouth.”
“Well would you rather have a temporary colorful tongue that can be seen as cool, or stay in the bathroom while crying for help?”
It seems like as soon as she said it, Nick gagged as he held his stomach.
“You have 30 seconds before you're going to shit your pants,” she states, looking at him up and down. He wasn’t moving.
“Nick, go!” Vada yelled as she choked on a small giggle, watching Nick run to the bathroom holding his pants up to his sides.
As the baggy clothed brunette watched her best friend race to the bathroom, she clicked her tongue and shook her head. Vada slurped on her red slushy. 
She was waiting for Nick until she noticed someone with a jacket wrapped around a tank top with her headphones on and book in one hand. You. She’s never seen you before and it was almost certain she’s seen everyone at least once before to know their name. She was bored, so she just watched.
You were folding a gum wrapper into a heart while you followed Mia into the girls restroom. Mia was always the one to give student tours when she could. You must’ve been new. But then you came back out without your jacket, holding it in the other hand as she saw Mia’s slushie spilled all over your jacket. She could almost hear how she was apologizing over and over again and you smiled it off, showing her how it was okay and you could clean up when you got home. 
Then she took you back to her friend group, seeing the way your hair went side to side as you walked. Before she could watch you even more, Nick called out her name.
“I just took the biggest shit of my li- what are you looking at?”
She hears him but doesn’t turn his way,still looking a little, “Just someone who I think is new. Mia is giving her a tour.”
Nick said a small “ohhh..” in response, “Well what’s so exciting about that?”
“Mia accidentally spilled the slushie we bought this morning on her jacket by accident.”
“That’s so not cool, she must be cold having to take that off, was she mad?”
“No, she just brushed it off, smiled in a somewhat assuring way, and gave Mia the gum wrapper she folded before Mia took her back to her friend group.”
“Ooh. She’s patient then.”
“Yeah.”
-
After lunch passed, Vada realized you were in almost all her periods, well only the ones she attended. Sometimes she was late from Amelia hogging the bus. You kept to yourself, gave shy smiles as the teachers introduced you.
But as the next day rose she was back at school again.
Her favorite class was her film class, it was like a free period and she got to touch cameras and watch movies at least twice a week.
She sits in the corner of the room, she likes the way she can look out the window and see the sight of the sky while also seeing her own reflection.
FIlm class is oddly comforting, music always plays before the period begins. She places her phone on top of her desk.
So for the third time that day, she sees you walk through, with your backpack hung over one shoulder and the other with a book. She wants to feel surprised, almost strange how you end up in her class, but instead she almost feels a sense of gratefulness. 
She doesn’t want to stare. But her eyes betray her, because in one second her eyes are on you. New students weren’t regular, well in her core classes, sure. But film? Almost never. She watches the way you wait by the teacher’s desk, waiting, unsure, not knowing if you should tap her shoulder or just wait until she notices you. Usually, Vada and Mia would sit together, but sometimes on bad days, they would have to move from talking and laughing too much. So they stuck to sitting diagonally and passing notes in the back of the classroom. Finally, the teacher notices you and the smile she gives you is almost too happy as she rubs your shoulder and stands up.
“Alright everyone,” she quiets down her music, “..usually during film I’d let the music keep rolling, but just for today I’d like you to greet our new student who just transferred here. Her name is Y/N.”
People around the class say awkward hi’s, random waves, some of the girls stare at you and awe, and even some of the well-known guys look at you, eyebrows raised and Vada can almost feel their want for you. 
It makes her roll her eyes in disgust.
You do an awkward wave, wanting to shrink into the floor, a smile tugged at your lips.
“Okay sweetheart, there aren’t many options for seating since this class is more compacted than my others. But you can sit next to Vada.” Ms. Valentina points at Vada, “She’s the one in the very back, the open seat behind Mia.” 
Your eyes almost light up when you notice Mia’s in your class, giving a small nod and trying to squish into the back. 
Mia waves at you, shaking your shoulders to show her excitement as you sit down. Vada can almost smell the sweetness of your shampoo when you sit. It smells like ripe strawberries with the fulfilling scent of roasted marshmallows. She wants to sniff your hair, but you’re already pulling out your notebook from your backpack.
“Hey girl!” Mia whispers, turning around to face you as you smile.
“Hey slurpee stainer,” you joke, your voice is soft, airy, melodic. Not like anything Vada’s ever heard. Sure she’s heard many voices, but yours sounded like a lullaby to shush a baby to sleep if you wanted to.
Mia giggles, slapping your arm, “I said I’m sorryyyy. I’d say I’d take you shopping on the weekends! Don’t use that against me,” she scolds, and that makes you laugh, you cup your mouth to contain the giggles and Vada can hear an adorable squeak come out from it.
“I know, don’t be sorry, I was just joking, I’ll just wash it when I get home,” you whisper.
Before you two could talk again the teacher spoke, “Okay guys, it was a long day yesterday and I was planning on printing out some papers for assignments two days prior, but our school printer broke and the ink on mine is hanging on for dear life.” She pauses, everyone didn’t know where she was going with this, “So I’m just going to roll a movie, you guys can choose but I really don’t have much. You can talk, keep it low and hey, if you’re sitting around Y/N, lighten up the mood and get to know her.”
There were random okays and suggestions. As Ms. Valentina kept reading aloud the names, it was almost certain that Shrek was going to be chosen. For the third time this month. Until she spoke out a new suggestion, and everyone chose La La Land instead.
As she played the movie off the projector, Mia scooted to you.
“Okay, so no pressure, buttt my dad's gone today and I know you said you didn’t have homework. If you don’t want to, it's completely understandable, but me and Vada,” she gestures to the brunette sitting next to you, with her hands clasped together and looking at you with interest, “We sometimes go on pool runs or just drive to the nearest seven eleven. Honestly, it’s whatever. But if you wanna hang, I can give you a ride back home, let you drop off your stuff, and we can get to know each other more at mine. What are you thinking?”
Your lips tug into a thoughtful grin, telling Mia she doesn’t have to because she accidentally spilled her drink on you. But Vada kept staring at you. The blonde glanced at her, she saw her basically staring at your side profile, then back at you before giving her a light leg nudge that you didn’t notice. 
“No no! Don’t feel pressured, just know that” Mia breathes and pats your forearm reassuringly, “..that I think we should hang out more, kay? You don’t know how many people don’t get mad when someone spills something on them. At least you’re someone who's patient as hell.” She makes you laugh as you think again.
“Okay, I’d love that,” you respond, simply. 
“Then it’s set! Just meet us at that broccoli lookin’ tree, kay?”
-
As soon as the bell roars and everyone starts opening the gates like it’s the ones they’ll see in heaven, you squish into the crowd of people and look for this broccoli looking tree Mia was referring to. It didn’t take you long.
The only broccoli looking tree was the only tree that was stranded from all the poofy and leafy looking trees, and you could see her with the other brunette that you sat next to in class. You think her name was Vada. You didn’t want to ask, if you did and Vada wasn’t her name, you might as well crawl into a hole. 
Mia immediately greets you.
Vada kicks at dirt beneath her, smiling a little foolishly, she realizes when she thinks how silly she might look to you. Her silly smile slightly fades to a more soft one to try and not seem weird. Instead you feel like she might feel uncomfortable with you, maybe she’s closed to people she meets at first. You hope that it doesn’t stay that way
“Get in!” The blonde smiles, and you swerve into the backseat as you drive off to the nearest seven eleven.
Mia’s car smells like flowers, you almost feel a little carsick from the leather and floral scent mixed together. You smell something else though, sweet plum and fluffy musk. You think it’s Vada, you can almost smell her shampoo from here.
It’s a little quiet, Mia talks to Vada, you try not to disrupt so you pretend you're looking at the window staring at literally nothing. It’s like the blue-eyed girl can see the way you try to keep to yourself and don’t want to be involved when you don’t think you should. So she bumps the music up.
Vada wants to talk to you. She can feel this urge for her heart to make her mouth open and speak. But for some reason she feels nervous. It’s weird, she’s usually open and starts off with teasing. Why can’t she speak now? Maybe it’s because.. Vada doesn’t even have a reason to know, she just doesn’t know.
“Dude, how is there traffic already to go to a fucking seven-eleven? We literally just left school.” Mia murmurs, tapping her shoes to the music.
Vada turns around, to look at the cars behind her, maybe to check how many are behind her.
That’s what Mia thought, but Vada wondered what you were doing. She's never met someone that tries to be considerate, to be polite and not wanting to interrupt anyone at any time
She notices the way you take the opportunity of the slightly opened window to take a breath of fresh air and let that small crack to let the small breeze blow through your hair. She sees the way you twirl your necklace up and down, side to side, then spin it around your fingers. She notices how you don’t notice her, so you don’t look at her, you look at the sky, the small baby cows, the cars. 
It’s like a pencil is engraving into her mind to write all the details she sees. But she doesn’t know why. 
Your figure slightly leans into the window, closing your eyes to rest. Maybe you’re thinking about Mia and what a good friend she is. Maybe you’re thinking about wanting to get to know her, Vada. Maybe you’re thinking of how long it’ll take for you to blend in into this place. Maybe you’re thinking how your place didn’t have many cows everywhere. Maybe you lived in the snowy mountains, or the coastal shorelines where you could take a dip in cool water every summer morning.
She sees your eyes flutter as the car slowly stops. Her body tenses and turns back to the front, you’re already at seven-eleven. 
“It’s honestly kind of warm outside, I can turn on the AC on this thing if you don’t wanna go,” Mia says, finally turning around to look at you rubbing your eyes.
“No, no, it’s ‘kay, I’ll come, gotta exercise these legs anyway.” You say, opening her door and following suite with Mia and Vada. The small concreted rocks crunching beneath your shoes. 
Mia obviously wants to check out the candy section, but Vada wants another slushy. 
“Hold up, I think they have the candy they didn’t have when I checked the other time. Vadaaa you can just roam with Y/N. I’m not sure if you guys had seven-eleven where you lived.” She peeks into the candy section and with a spin of a corner she’s gone.
Vada stands there, awkwardly. She feels like if anything, you should be the one standing there like that. You stand there, looking at the slushies. Cola, blue raspberry, cherry, mountain dew, honestly you didn’t know if you should get one.
“Do you want to get one?” Vada asks, the first time you really heard her speak.
Your ears perk, turning to face her, “I’m not really a slushy person,” you speak softly, “I’m a little thirsty though.”
Vada smiles at that, “I like the cherry flavor and blue raspberry, but you gotta swirl it a certain way for it to taste the way I really like it, y’know?” She speaks, you nod, noticing her baggy basketball shorts and oversized shirt.
She walks closer, she can smell the same sweetness of your scent. Strawberries and roasted marshmallows. Your scent is oddly comforting, a scent where anyone would hug you longer and never let you go to smell it forever.
She stops before you can process anything, slightly backing away and focusing on the slushy dispenser.
“Okay. So like, I know you’re probably not supposed to do this but I just put my index and middle finger under the dispenser and,” she stops, looking at you, “make sure you wash your hands though,” she laughs. “But if you don’t know what flavor, just lick it off your fingers.”
Vada can almost sense you suppressing your laughter, “Seriously! I don’t give two shits about those security cameras. Honestly we go here so often we could get a free slushy and not pay.” She places her fingers under the dispenser of the cherry blast and presses the button, stopping it and licking it off her fingers.
It’s like she’s teaching you. She likes the way you’re interested and really looks like you want to learn.
“Do you want to try?” The slightly shorter brunette asks, her voice trying not to seem pressuring at all.
You think, looking at her fingers as she wipes it with a random brown napkin and throwing it away in the trash, “Okay,” your smooth voice responds before approaching beside her.
You use your index finger and place it under the blue raspberry one.
“This one?” Vada questions, when you nod she presses softly on the dispense button.
Your giggle from the icy cold makes her feel like the happiness she feels when she makes a small child laugh.
Vada turns to look at you and smiles, taking off her hand off the dispense button and watching you lick your fingers. (they were clean I promise)
“I like this one,” you say, making a small eye contact glance with her.
“Do you want it? I can pay.”
“It’s okay, I’ll see what’s at Mia’s home, I seriously don’t think I can finish the small one alone!”
-
Vada gets to know you more the more Mia invites you. She notices the way you open up, instead of trying to politely look out the window so you don’t disrupt conversations that you aren’t sure what their about, the car is lively,
Loud.
The music is always turned down now, giggles are filled, sometimes there are jokes about classes, teachers, people, the past.
Sometimes there are questions, family, hobbies.
Vada learns you have two siblings, a much younger and much older one, older brother, younger sister.
You like to read and write, play the guitar, bake, you love going on sunsetty and late night drives, it makes her interested in that part.
When you told her, a part of her wanted to tell you, ‘I like late night drives too.’ Maybe she’ll drive you around the freeway on a summer weekend in the future.
She likes the way you include her, how you always include people to make sure they never feel lonely.
She begins to notice the way your smiles aren’t shy anymore, they’re genuine. She can feel the way you’re opening up to her, from the way you look at her in a way she doesn’t remember. You look at her like she feels like she’s the only girl you’re looking at. She sees how your eyes soften in your irises the more you listen to her speak.
-
Vada never thought she’d experience jealousy for the first time in her life.
Sure she’s felt it before, when her fists clench when she had gotten second place when she was younger. It was like an ember. But this time, it was much stronger.
It was during some school event her high school came up with, couples day or what not.
You sat next to Vada and Nick during lunch, Mia with her friend group usually at this time. You were huddled up to Vada, munching on some chips with your hair up. 
“Omph, I think jazz is better than rock honestly,” you say, muffled with chips in your mouth.
“Mmm, reasonable.”
After taking a long refreshing sip of water, you and Vada stand up.
“Nick, me and Y/N are gonna meet up Mia in the hallway, ‘kay? See you weirdo,” Vada walks along with you as you two laugh with each other over random gossip.
As you see Mia in the distance, wanting to wave her over, your friend Liam grabs you by the waist, his hands gentle, flowers in his hand.
You almost jump. You met Liam around the first week of school, he was sweet, gentle-man like. He offered to study with you in the library after school. 
“Y/N, hey,” he says, his voice like syrup. Too sweet for your liking, “Sorry for pulling you away. I just wanted to tell you something.”
You saw how Vada stood on the side, awkwardly, not to mention how she was glaring at Liam.
You turn back to the curled hair blonde in front of you, “That’s ‘kay, what is it?”
Liam hands you the flowers he was holding, leaving you, almost confused, your face heating up.
“Look, I know I didn’t know you for long, but you’re sweet, you know? No one ever has to talk bad about you and to be in this school as a person like that is rare. I kind of, you know, like you. You’re pretty, really smart, and have a personality of gold. I know you don’t really like me, but I’d like to know what you think.”
You stare at the flowers held in your hands, your hands feel clammy. 
“Liam.. This is really sweet. I appreciate.. You know, you thinking of me in that silver lighting. It honestly, in a sense, makes me feel proud. Thanks. I, I think I need some time, I never thought of you as the kind of person I’d be in a relationship with. But maybe with time if we get to know each other.. You know.. Gosh I’m sorry.” Your voice trails off, a tight smile on your lips, seeing the way Liam nodded immediately in understanding. You felt bad. Rejecting the sweetest boy you ever knew in this school, you just never saw him as something more than a brother.
“Don’t be sorry Y/N, that’s okay, I know what you mean, I just wanted to tell you before it got out of hand, but hey, now that I told you, as long as we stay friends that’s okay. That won’t change any friendship right?”
“I promise,” you assure, smiling a little.
Liam nods again, flowers in your hand as he gives your shoulder a gentle squeeze and leans in to kiss your forehead.
He then walks away and you look down at the flowers in hand.
“Okay, that was cheesy as hell,” Vada says, her voice almost annoyed, maybe from waiting to see Liam’s monologue.
“I didn’t even know he felt that way about me.”
Vada rolls her eyes, “Of course you don’t,” you can’t help but feel almost hurt from her words. It’s like she was calling you oblivious, ignorant.
“Why would he even give you flowers? Gosh, he’s going wild for you, you barely even know him. He’s doing too much for someone like you right now,” she scoffed, slightly, not knowing why someone that you haven’t known for a while would give you flowers so early when you didn’t know him that well. But she worded it so wrongly.
Offended, almost wounded, insulted. Did Vada really think you were the kind of person no one would like? Did one of your closest friends find you in a sense, unlovable?
Vada saw the way your figure tensed, your eyes narrowing, before looking like they were about to cry.
Shit. 
God she’s never seen you cry before. Vada felt her heart almost shatter, seeing the way your eyes were beginning to fill with tears. She didn’t mean it in a rude way, god now that she thinks about it, that’s one of the rudest things she could say. 
She didn’t mean it, Vada doesn’t even know why she said it, maybe she just didn’t think Liam was right for you. 
She felt jealousy, and she could feel it herself. Maybe she wanted a sweet guy too.
Or maybe she just wanted you.
“God Y/N, I didn’t mean-” Vada reaches her hand to your shoulder and immediately you shrug it off. 
“You don’t think that I’m lovable enough to truly be loved, is that what it is Vada?” You say, your eyes sharp, “You don’t think I’m capable of deserve someone like Liam? How do you even see me?” You murmur, looking obviously, something Vada never wanted in the first place, in disbelief to even feel a tear slip down to your cheek.
“No, I swear I just-”
The bell had rang, and before she could try to apologize, and run after you, you squeezed into the crowd of people, heading for the class Vada knew was the only one you didn’t have with her.
Mia watched from a distance, seeing how tears poured from your eyes as you pushed through the crowds of people.
-
It’s tense, sort of, when Mia drives to her house.
You’re not talking to Vada, headphones are in, basically screaming that you’re closed off right now. Vada wants to talk to you, but she doesn’t know how to apologize for something she didn’t mean.
You look at the window outside and she feels like this might’ve gone back to stage one, it might take weeks for you to open up again.
But yet again, you’re Y/N, she knows you too well to know that you would never try to ignore her for that long.
Mia has to turn up the music again, something that hasn’t really happened for almost a few months, making small talk with Vada.
When you get to her house, Vada holds the door for you, you don’t look at her, just mumble a small, “thanks.”
“Shoot, sorry guys, if you guys are okay with staying here for half an hour or so, that’d be great. I completely forgot I had to stay after school and drop off one of my friends,” Mia immediately slaps her face, grabbing her bag for dance as she looks back, “Fridge is open if you guys want snacks, remote is in the cabinet under the couch, and all those joints ‘n stuff are in the back. K, love you, see ya,” Mia says, blowing a funny air kiss before shutting the door.
Now it’s awkward, out of all days of course Mia has a practice.
It’s quiet, your headphones are hung around your neck, kicking your feet against the carpet uncomfortably, you don’t know if you want to speak.
“Please, can you talk to me?” Vada pleads, making you almost flinch.
“I’m sorry for what I said today, I swear I didn’t mean it in a mean way towards you. I hope you know me well enough to know I would never mean it, okay? I was just getting a little upset over the fact guys would try asking girls out when they don’t know them that much, you know?.. Um.. Yeah. I guess I got a little overprotective. So I’m sorry. I hate when we don’t talk, it makes me feel like you hate me and stuff.”
You look at her, tugging your bottom lip between your lips, then you breathe, “I don’t hate you Vads. I promise. I just got a little taken aback and I honestly felt a little hurt from your words, especially since I knew you weren’t the kind of person to say those things in a mean manner. I forgive you. I really care about you, it was just weird today. I already felt bad rejecting a sweet boy I met and I wasn’t expecting to have my feelings hurt about it, I know you didn’t mean it.”
“I swear I didn’t, I just didn’t think Liam should’ve asked you so early, I didn’t even think you gave any signs.”
You giggle, making Vada’s shoulders relax from your icy facade beginning to melt, “You sound jealous.”
“Oh, nuh-uh.”
“Mm..” You mutter, not believing her, and making her groan. 
Vada quickly changes the topic, realizing how red her face was. 
“Do you wanna.. Um, go outside? Take a breather for a bit.”
“Okay.”
As you two close the sliding door, Vada sits down next to you, the silence is now comfortable. Her eyes begin to linger on the pack of cigars in front of her.
“I know you’re not the kind to smoke, but do you wanna share a blunt with me?” Vada asks, softly, it’s a question that you know if you say no, she’ll completely get it.
You hesitate, you never smoked before, let alone want to. But you look at Vada’s eyes and your head nods yes.
“Okay.”
You can see the excitement on her face, she makes a small squeal as she begins to roll the blunt, lighting it up with a lighter, you see her brush off some of the dust. 
She places her lips on the cigarette, inhaling softly, before exhaling the smoke and a plethora of smoky fog wafts around you.
Her soft eyebrows raise, her eyes flicking to the blunt and your eyes, offering it to you.
Vada hears you breathe, she can almost feel your breath on her face as you look at the cigarette.
“A little help here?” You ask, voice tiny, shy. 
“Okay baby,” Vada jokes, seeing the way your lips try not to smile, but fail miserably.
Vada scoots closer to you, so you two are huddled up and she takes your hand, “Okay, you always spin your led pencil in class, just hold the blunt similarly.” She feels the warmth of your hand and it makes her breath hitch. She puts the blunt between your index and middle finger, in which you make sure to hold with grip. Vada taps on your thumb, “Up,” her voice instructs, in which you support your thumb to hold it.
“Hey, now you got it!” she pats your shoulder, like a ‘yay’
She leans closer to you, your face is mere inches apart as she gently places the end of the cigarette in your mouth. Immediately the smoke fills your senses and you look at Vada, she coaxes you, “Inhale, not too much.” You inhale, wait for a moment, then exhale. 
“There you go, you’re making me feel like a teacher Y/N,” she clicks her tongue.
She sees the way you exhale through your mouth, and the smoke fades in front of her face, you take another hit, this time you’re full on staring at Vada, with your doe eyes deep into hers. 
The smoke wafts around her again, and when you pass it to her, you lean into her. Hearing how her breath hitches, your body pressed against her.
It goes like that for a while, puff, puff, pass. Where Vada offers the blunt to you, but instead of taking it with your finger, your lips part and your teeth nibble on the cigarette for a moment. 
It’s like a game. She doesn’t know if it’s the humor you’ve grown, or the teasing. The teasing. But the way you make eye contact with her while your lips capture the blunt you two have shared makes her stomach stir.
While you smoke and you feel the ease of tranquility wash over your senses, Vada grabs some munchies, cookies, some donuts Mia bought the other day, and some potato chips.
She can’t see you. But she knows you’re staring at her, she can feel the way she senses she’s being watched. 
You’re there, staring at her, looking down at her baggy clothing, then looking back up while she puts down the snacks. Your cheeks are flushed, you hear the way the music on your phone is beginning to fade, because you’re here, staring at her. 
You think you may have taken too many hits, it’s a different kind of high. You just want to take the potato chips and grow wings. Fly away from this place and go to Italy.
Vada notices, you look spaced out, but you’re staring at her. Not as captivated as you were once before, so she nudges you and you immediately look back up at her. She’s high, she sees a glint in your mesmerizing eyes. A glint that makes her want to pull you closer.
“I feel high,” you state, you don’t notice how you sound till your speech is slurred.
“I think we’ve caught on to that,” Vada laughs, with a roll of her eyes as you snack on potato chips.
“I feel like you're prettyyy Vadss.. Pretty dope and badass,” you say, your fingers showing a peace sign and Vada busts out laughing.
“You have some nasty high that makes you use my kind of slang huh Y/N?”
You’re staring again, except the only difference now is she can tell what kind of stare it is. And this time it makes her feel weird, she can’t put her finger on it.
“Oh yeah, uh huh, yeppers,” you murmur, munching on potato chips and throwing it across the outside couch you sat on, “Can we have a cheese pizza instead with tickling my pickling pickle?..”
Flying. You feel like you’re flying, breathing out and in that smoke. Vada feels like she should be laughing but by the time she feels that she already is.
The cigarette in your hand gets twisted and her footsteps on it, cracking it.
“Think that’s enough for today Y/N, you’re not speaking from the heart.”
“Pickles?”
“No.”
“Dill.”
“No pickles!”
“Yes pickl-No!!!-okay..”
Finally, Vada drags you inside Mia’s house, carrying you to the couch and tossing you on it.
“WeeeEeeEEeEEE,” you’re acting silly. Vada has never seen this care-free, childish side in you. 
“I think you’re gonna need to sleep this high off sleeping beauty.”
“I can’t sleeeeeep.”
“Well you need to sleep,” Vada forces, authority lacing her voice. You make a grumble. 
“Okay fine,” the small cushion on the couch shifts from you moving around so much. Vada watches you in the corner of your eye, finding it a little cute the way you are right now.
She was going to buy some dill pickles while you closed your eyes, but you seemed like you couldn’t, making Vada sigh and approach you.
“Scooch,” her voice rings in your ears, rubbing your hair softly as you make a tired, grumpy sound and scoot a little, your body wrapped into a marshmallowy blanket.
She doesn’t think she would do this, but if she can make you shut up a little bit, and feel your warmth, maybe it’ll be okay. The shorter brunette feels the way you curl into her body and melt like putty. She doesn’t think much of it, what you two are sharing right now.
Vada feels fond, to let you feel safe in her arms, is something she will always cherish.
Her voice hushes you, pressing her lips to your forehead, while you murmur about pickles. The whispers begin to die down, like the ending of a symphony. She cuddles you, you nudge your nose into her chest, “Don’t go Vads..” your voice is barely heard, but she can hear it, “Stay.”
“It’s okay Y/N, I’ll be here when you wake up.”
“Promise?”
“Pinky,” her pinky raises up and interlocks with yours.
“Okay.”
“Okay.”
“Now sleep angel,” her voice is teasing, but part of it she feels like you’ve grown on her, this childish side that she finds sweet.
You don’t respond, of course you don’t, because as soon as she looks down at you asleep on her chest. And by the time she can even process, Vada is asleep with you.
Mia comes home seeing you two sleep together, taking 5 photos and even having the time to take 2 polaroid pictures of you two wrapped into each other.
“Those two are going to be together soon.”
-
It’s the fourth time you’ve watched Shrek in film class. 4 damn times for 2 months.
Vada is starting to tick, you giggle at it. But she finds Shrek so iconic, she can’t bring herself to hate it. Well for now.
“I fucking feel like I can actually memorize each line by now,” she mutters, it makes you and Mia laugh even harder. 
“Why doesn’t Ms. Valentina choose the movies after that? It’s always just Shrek 1.” 
Vada doesn’t even know by now. 
The lights turn off, the only sunshine you can see is from the warmth of the sun that creeps into the blinds. The best part of having film in this period is that she always has it first on Fridays. Which means when the light switches turn off, it’s the queue where everyone pushes the desks and gets comfy, the desks stay on the side for the rest of the day.
After grunts and small clatter of water bottles falling down from people pushing the desks, everyone crawls to their spot in their own little friend group they have. 
Vada already has the couch in the back of the classroom reserved, she doesn’t give no shits, if she’ll fight for it she will. 
You find it a little funny, since you remember how people stopped trying to fight, she’s persistent. 
She pats the seat next to her and you sit next to her. Mia sits next to you. 
And for the rest of the period you three gossip, curl into each other, and chatter.
-
Once again, at the end of the school day, you, Vada, and Mia are laying together on the couch with several blankets and stuffed animals stacked on top of each other.
“Pass the popcorn please,” you nudge Mia, who’s holding the large popcorn box filled with buttery popcorn (that she kept when she ordered a jumbo sized popcorn box from the movies, that cost 10 damn dollars.) Mia passes it to Vada, which munches on a handful, then hands it to you. Of course with you ending up with some popcorn thrown into your hair.
You happy snack on the popcorn, munching and crunching. Vada and your hands dig into the bottom with the richer buttered popcorn. The brunette’s cheeks feel warm from feeling your hand. Maybe from the blanket. Maybe from the heat of the popcorn. Or maybe something else. 
Mia regrets asking Vada for a movie recommendation. As soon as she sees Vada search up ‘Sh’ on the search bar, she groans, seeing how Vada clicked Shrek. 
For the second, fucking, time, today.
As the movie begins to roll, the blonde whispers, “If I have children, I’m never gonna let them watch this. It’s been playing way more than enough and I am not risking having to play it every morning when I’m older.”
Vada snorts, “I’m going to tell your children that it’s a great movie, so great that they’ll play it morning and night.”
It goes like that for the next 30 minutes, you two are snug, with a fluffy weighted blanket draped over the three of you as the movie continues.
As the forty five minute mark surpasses, Vada is distracted in the movie. She’s seen it 4 times, yet she’s still watching it. She feels a faint pressure press against her shoulder, she brushes it off, she knows that it’s her brain signaling her to stop watching the movie.
She doesn’t.
But as the minutes pass, the pressure stays, if not stronger.
She feels curious, turning her head away from the projector to find you asleep peacefully on her shoulder. Vada’s eyes soften at the sight of your lips parted, gentle breaths blowing on her neck from your lips and the white of the blanket covering your chin. You’re asleep, and it brings her back to you two asleep on each other the other day. But this time it feels different. You two aren’t high.
You were curled up to her, with your legs tucked and faced to the edge of the couch. She’s seen you asleep before, when you were so tired one hung out that Mia lent you your room. Vada only peeked inside to see you asleep and still like a rock. You aren’t the kind to fall asleep easily, let alone snore. But Vada could hear a soft snore fall from your lips.
Vada can’t help it, but she feels a grin trying to form on her face, as you curl up to her, she tucks a hand around your waist to pull you closer. Now your hair is draped all over her shoulders, she sniffs it, nudging her nose to your hair. Your shampoo smells again like strawberries. 
Except this time it smells more intoxicating.
It smells so lightly sweet. But it makes her feel dizzy, her nose to the top of your head, relying on your scent to comfort her. 
You shift lightly, a soft murmur being made as your eyes slightly twitch, but fall asleep just as fast when she takes a strand of hair in her fingertips and curls it. 
As you're asleep and Vada is focused on you, Mia mumbles against her, quiet enough to not wake you. The TV was already loud enough, plus you were all the way in the corner.
“You like Y/N,” she says, and it wasn’t an opinion, it was a rhetorical statement.
Vada slows down with her fingers curling in your hair, turning to face Mia.
She feels a stutter get caught into her throat, “Uh, w-wait what?”
“You like Y/N,” she says again, her blue eyes looking at Vada, searching for an answer. An answer she already knew, she just needed to hear it from her.
“N-no, what? Mia, what makes you think that?”
It sounds stupid to the blonde, a small laugh coming from her, she speaks quieter so you can’t hear her, although you’re knocked off asleep.
“Well, to start off, since she stepped into our film class for the first day, you couldn’t stop staring at her Vads. And when I invited her so we could get to know her better, I’ve never seen you so quiet with someone until you met her. You’re always so open to meeting new people. At first, I thought you were nervous,” Mia laughs, finding it almost unbelievable when she says it out loud, “and never thought the Vada Cavell would be nervous to meet new people. But you look at her like the missing puzzle piece you’ve taken years to find. You look at her like she’s given you the light to your universe.”
Vada wants to roll her eyes, tell Mia how insane she is, she wants to throw her hands in the air. But she doesn’t want to, she doesn’t want to wake you up, she just wants to press her lips to your forehead and tell you that everything is okay when you wake up. 
But it all comes down at her at once. She can’t believe it herself. Well she knew she felt something. The the way she sees things now. Where she’d walk into a library filled with books and think, “Y/N would love it here.” Or when she’d smell the aroma in the air when Amelia and her mother would bake cookies together, and can’t help, but think about you. 
Mia herself has a guitar, and when there are days when you can’t make it, Vada spends two hours as her best friend talks to her to practice. So maybe one day, when she sees you pull out her guitar, she’ll say, “I can play it too.”
And when your pretty eyes already reveal the yearn you feel to hear her play, she’ll play all the songs that she’s practiced while she eagers you to cuddle up to her. Then you’ll realize they are all your favorite songs. Because Vada spent every two hours when you’re not there to practice for you. 
She hears Mia keep speaking, “You bring her up every time you can, okay? You’re reminded of her everywhere you go, and I’ve never seen you or her look at someone the way you do with each other. Remember that day you two first met? The whole car rode to seven eleven, you were staring at her staring at the window.”
“You’re falling for her day by day Vada,” Mia says, and the brunette can see the way Mia begins to smile, “You just don’t notice it until you realize how much she means to you. You used to refuse to take the extra guitar I had, but when you saw the way she played riffs, you took it and played songs that you knew one day you would want to play for her.”
Mia pauses, then speaks again, “You should’ve seen how shattered she was when you grew over protective of her and said some things that came out wrong. You didn’t see the way as soon as she left for 5th period she was going to cry. Come on, and you two fucking fell asleep with each other. It’s like I’m reading the slowest burn wattpad book in reality.”
The shorter girl is still stroking through your hair, as you’re asleep with soft snores coming out of your mouth every once in a while, still trying to process something she knew was true for a long time.
Vada doesn’t want to admit it, but she exhales a breath she didn’t know she was holding, “I don’t know. I just feel really fond of her I guess. She’s grown really special to me and I think she’s someone I never knew I needed in my life. She’s there to you know, listen. Or be open to whatever..” Vada plays with the string of her oversized shorts while letting you nuzzle to her neck. “I guess she’s more important to me than I thought.”
Mia silently squeals, nudging Vada’s shoulder, “You can’t not convince me she likes you too, okay? Now you better fucking confess or I’m going to do a backflip and crack your neck open.”
-
Vada hasn’t felt nervous since she met you, but today she was nervous nervous. She bought sky blue, pink, ivory, and sweet apple tulips. 
It feels so cheesy, but she’s fucking here for it.
She prepares a basket with everything she knows about you, lego flowers, a cow stuffy with some random coquette bow attached to it, (that she may have not asked your older brother what animal you liked.) As soon as she shopped, the cute little cow with the laced bow wrapped around it was calling for her.
She fills the basket with kisses, tears off the most beautiful, raw pieces of poetry, she read and thought of you. She tears the extra copies of the songs she played on the guitar because of you, and adds it as scraps. 
And of course, she adds small fairy lights, then attaches all the photos she has with you. She has never been more thankful for Mia always taking 2 polaroids whenever you take one together, so she can keep one and add it to her memory book.
She’s anxious, picking at her fingers, it’s like when she first experienced the shooting. Except this is a hundred times worse.
Mia drops her off Saturday morning, giving her shoulder a reassuring squeeze, “The worst she can say is no,” and by the way Vada clenches the basket she has for you, Mia quickly adds, “Which is a .00001% chance. Trust me, I’m sure she’ll say yes.”
Vada rolls her eyes, clearly not helping easing her anxiety as she closes the door and approaches your door, knocking softly.
When it’s open, she’s greeted with the sight of a newly awoken you, looking sleepy, but she thinks it makes you even cuter.
You’re wearing the plaid pants she lent you, she remembers you couldn’t stop wearing it because it was so comfy. She let you have her extra fourth pair. She found it funny whenever she saw you waddling around in her oversized clothes.
“Mhh..” You keep rubbing your eyes, a yawn escaping out of you, “Vads it’s 8AM on a Saturday morning, what’s going o-” you finally open your eyes to have a nervous fidgety Vada with tulips, some Valentine's day throwup basket and a heart shaped balloon.
Vada takes a deep breath before pushing the tulips towards your way, “Okay, Y/N, I don’t know what to say. But I wanted to tell you for a while now. I notice the way I bring you up everyday, or how long my gaze lingers when you’re in the same room as me. Or how I find a way to bring our friendship up every second I can. I’ve grown the motivation to do the hobbies I’ve seen you once do. And.. I’m not the person to.. Get nervous when I meet people for the first time. But, you’ve been someone who I feel protective over, and you’re special to me in a way where you’re someone I didn’t ever think I needed in my life. But meeting you has really made you be the highlight of my day. I didn’t think it was possible to feel butterflies, let alone these fluttering sparks when you’re near. Or to realize the feelings I felt when Liam gave you flowers and wanted to ask you out was jealousy. It just feels right to have you with me, here. You’ve really distracted me from all the things I’ve found stressful, and no one has ever been able to do that. I didn’t even think it was possible. I-I don’t even know how, but it was like some invisible string tied us when I met you, but I’m so thankful you’re in my life. And it’s so weird to say this now..” 
Vada pauses, catching her breath and trying not to make eye contact with you, but she can see your cheeks getting rosy. Your hands are full with her flowers. You certainly don’t look awkward like you once did with Liam. More like, overly shy now. You’re blushing. And this time your hands don’t feel clammy. This time, you’re so desperate to feel her hands on your waist and have your hands tucked around her to hug her.
Vada gulps and blurts out almost too quickly to comprehend, “But I like you. Will you go out for dinner with me this Friday night? I get if you don’t feel the same, and I just want you to know I don’t want our friendship to be ruined at all but-”
“Vada, I’d love to go out with you.” You interrupt, wanting her to shut up and kiss you. To do all the sweet things you thought of when you smoked with her, to fly with her and carry her home.
“R-really? You’re not just saying that?”
“No. I think.. I don’t know, I think we’ve grown really really close, in a way where I never had someone that I could rely on so much. I really didn’t think meeting you could, you know, make my day a hundred times better, and I always felt confused with my feelings, you know? In a way where I feel like friends shouldn’t feel the sweet way I think about you?”
“Yeah..” Vada murmurs, “Yeah,” she says, more understanding.
She turns to you, you look like spring. The season, with your hands filled with flowers, your hair perfectly ruffled and your hair curling in your ends. Vada speaks again, “Do you want to give us a try? You know, I just don’t ever want us to not be friends one day because we didn’t work out.”
“Please,” you whisper, and when you say that she immediately pulls you in for a hug. 
This hug is just as comforting as all the other ones she’s given you in the past. But now, the thought of this hug being something more isn’t there anymore. Because it is something more. It makes you bury your nose into her chest.
Mia smiles in the distance, snapping a photo of you two hugging, “Those two love birds, I called it.”
-
Friday night
Here you are, in a black dress you remember you fell in love with when you went shopping. It was a simple dress where your shoulders were exposed, a laced neck and you put on some hoops. 
The dress was not too short, but it stopped a little before your knees. 
And of course, a string tying the prettiest bow on the back of your waist, you didn’t want to admit it, but you felt pretty when you looked at the mirror. 
Your mother dropped you off outside of the restaurant Vada reserved. 
She kisses your cheek goodbye, winking for good luck as you wave and watch her go. Now you kind of regret not bringing a jacket. You should’ve brought the leather one you were thinking about at the last minute, and decided not to.
Your headphones are plugged in, you’re 15 minutes early, and as the minutes tick, you feel colder from the sun beginning to set.
Cologne by beabadoobee is playing, you ruffle your curled hair, till you feel the music abruptly stop and your headphones being wrapped around your neck.
You can hear Vada’s voice, ruffling your hair, “Hi,” she says, not more awkward than you feel right now. You feel her gaze linger on your figure, and suddenly you feel hot, the cold you felt 5 minutes ago was completely gone. 
She rubs your shoulders, and you can tell what you’re wearing just made her fall much more for you.
What she’s wearing is not Vada. Not her basketball shorts and oversized tees. This is Vada, in all black with the lightest makeup, you can still see the freckles you love. Her hair is half up half down, and you brush her bangs to the side.
“Vads,” you breathe, and the way you call her that makes her heart pound ferociously, “You look pretty.”
“I tried my best, how do I look, silly pretty girl?” Vada twirls her dress, making you laugh.
“Like something Vada would never wear, but I love it.”
“You’re the one to talk, all soft and shy girl wearing something that I would definitely not stop staring at this whole evening. It’s perfect. You’re perfect, come on Y/N,” she tugs your wrist slightly, noticing how your wrists are decorated with the bracelets you two made together in the past. It makes her smile while she points at it, “Good decoration choice.”
“Only for the best.”
As you two enter the restaurant, you reach for Vada’s hand, she can see the way you’re searching for her. Like a puppy whining for its mother. She drifts her hand towards you and interlaces it with yours.
The place is dimly lit. The only light is from the sunsetty view and the fairy lights that are hung. 
It’s romantic.
And you feel all blushy, like some teenage girl in a friends to lovers book.
Vada feels the way you grasp onto her hands, your fingertips squeezing, she can already tell you’re nervous, she calms you down with a circle with her thumb on the back of your palm. 
You two sit next to each other, looking at the menu.
It’s getting a little cold, and you shift, “Okay, not to ruin the mood, but I have no clue what in the hell I should get,” Vada laughs, the Y/N humor she knew was clearly showing.
“What about we share some alfredo and their bread? Their bread is so filling and to die for.”
You nod, to go with the flow, “Okay Vads, whatever you think is good must be yummy.”
You two order and spend the time talking, by the next 15 minutes of waiting, you’re cuddled into her, playing with her hair.
“Hey, you’re messing my hair up silly.”
“I like playing with it. It’s very smooth!”
Vada presses her lips to your temple, rubbing your cheeks to make your blush more apparent.
“Stop that.”
“Well I think it’s cute when your face is all pink.”
You make a quiet whine, Vada still smells your toasted marshmallow and strawberry scent. The scent she could never get tired of. The intoxicating sweetness.
A few moments later with cuddles and talks, your food arrives and you share the noodles, digging in. Vada drapes your hair back so it won't fall into the sauce. As you eat and munch, Vada twirls the noodles on her fork and brings it to your lips, looking into your eyes. You look back up at her, feeling tiny as you open your mouth and she feeds you. You feed her back, letting her rub the small speck of sauce on your cheek with her thumb.
“Stop being so shy,” Vada whispers, nudging your nose to hers.
“I’m just nervous, I’ve never done this before,” you whisper back.
“Well, it’s just me, nothings gonna change, I swear, maybe I’ll throw more pillows during pillow fights though,” she jokes, and that makes you nuzzle your nose more to hers.
You press your lips to her cheek and continue snacking on bread rolls and dessert.
-
“The stars are really bright today,” you say, your hand in Vadas as you two are staring at the scene above you, the sunset long gone and replaced with the light from the moon.
“Wellll, I think that just means that we’re amazing for each other, huh?”
“Maybe.”
“Nope, it’s a yes.”
“Yep.”
The heat you felt when you first saw Vada when your date began was gone, you were cold. No doubt did the girl not notice, seeing your slightly trembling figure. She drapes her leather jacket over you as you make a small noise of appreciation, sniffling your nose. The jacket immediately warms you up, you pull it to your shoulders more.
Her soft eyes look down at you, and she sees the way the stars reflect off your eyes, those eyes. She feels lucky to be able to be greeted by them every single day you’re around.
“Thank you for today,” you finally breathe, and Vada boops your nose.
“Well thank you for always being sweet and silly. I wouldn’t trade this moment for anyone else.”
You boop her nose back, sharing a slurpee that of course you got from seven eleven. It brings her deja vu. To remember how you first politely refused on buying a slurpee when you first met Vada. Then beginning to use the trick she taught you to poke your finger under the dispenser and lick your finger. Then buying your own small slurpee. Then to share it with one straw. 
As you two reach her house, she twirls you on the porch and lifts you up, making you squeal and giggle. It’s quiet, comfortable silence as she looks down at your lips. And she knows you want her too. Your legs wrap around her, and you lean and press your lips to hers. 
She feels sparks and a flock of butterflies stirring in your stomach when you’re around, but as she feels your soft, warmth of your lips on hers, she feels fireworks. Electricity shocking her whole body. She hears you make a soft moan of longing, something you wanted for so long. She wanted you for so long too. Her lips press against yours more, feeling your desperateness as she leans more pressure onto you. You taste like sweet strawberries, indulging on the way you make a noise of wanting more more more of her lips as her tongue runs over your bottom lip.
You both pull away, panting, cheeks flushed, your body feels like it’s flaming into oblivion, she grabs your waist tightly, then a small smile forms on both of your faces.
“I’m pretty sure you kiss during like.. Your fourth date.”
“Oh,” Vada says, faking to look sad before cracking up a grin, “Oh well, we’re too in love with each other and we broke that! Too bad, so sad.”
You giggle as she twirls you around and brings you into her room, kissing your neck along the way, she tosses you into the bed and you squeal, kicking your legs as she crawls next to you.
“Come here,” she whispers, you scoot closer to embrace and she wraps her arms around you, switching the fireplace on and playing some music in the background.
She spoons you, but you turn your front to be pressed to her chest, feeling her kisses on your neck and her fingers ghosting along your jawline.
“Pretty girl,” she coos, seeing the way you were a little tired, “Sleepy?”
“Yes.”
You bury your nose into her, her sweet, musky, coconut scent comforts you. The way your scent mixes and it just smells so… Your eyes are fluttering before you can come up with a thought. You stir in Vada’s arms, feeling her arms wrapped around your waist and your limbs tangled together.
“Don’t let go, stay,” you whisper, like you once did before in the past.
“I won’t, pinky promise, I’ll be here baby. Go to sleep, okay?”
You both begin to fall asleep, with polaroids hanging off you wrapped around vines around Vada’s bed. There was one with you two holding slushies and showing off your purple tongues, another one with you two in a group photo, one that Vada loved the most, where you two were cuddling. 
miaa: you owee meee omg u guys r adorable, update me tmmrw vads
Your pinkies interlock and your cuddle up to her. She can see the way your eyes twitch from closing. She knows you’re asleep when she hears your breathing begin to even out. And she definitely knows she’s your comfort, because a soft snore slips out of you no longer than 5 minutes later.
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bangchansgirlsblog · 2 days
Note
HELLO🤩
i am in a randomly good mood
and i need angst to ruin it
so
i present to you
HYUNJIN X READER- they get into a fight and he raises his hand as if he’s gonna hit her and she flinches and he’s like…. “i can’t deal with your shit rn” and LEAVES *a collective gasp rises from the audience* and she’s all like “well i can’t deal with your shit either” and ALSO LEAVES (like the apartment they share or smth lol) and goes to stay at another members house (but like she’s being reasonable because it was a REALLY bad fight😓) and it ends in him apologizing after realizing he was a total dick teehee🤭
sorry if that’s too much lol keep up the great work!!🩵
Protective services
Warning: Angry Hyunjin, violence (not really), angst/comfort
Pairing: hyunjin x reader
It’s 4 am and it’s so fucking hot omg. Shoot me 😔
**
“Hyunjin,” Y/n softly called for her boyfriend from the kitchen. He was sat in their living room finishing off a song on his laptop so he was quite concentrated but still he made sure to reply.
“Hm?”
“Baby, what do you think we should take to your mums house for dinner tomorrow?” She walked over to their dining room to sit and jot down the shopping list of things she needed for the huge family dinner at his family’s home.
“I don’t know, you figure it out,” he waved her off and quickly looked back at his computer. His eyebrows were furrowed and he had his glasses on.
She let out a frustrated sigh and continued to write down the list desiding she would make some kimchi and fried rice. Perfect.
Satisfied with her list she went to change into some grocery shopping clothes and turned it the lights. “Hyunjin, I’m going grocery shopping,” she informed the older man who was pulling at his hair.
“Yeah, hm? Okay, okay,” he dismissed her again not even listening to what she had to say this cause her blood to boil. Atleast he could offer to come spend time with her but ofcourse work took all his time. It was always work, work, work.
She grabbed her wallet and closed the door behind her before quickly making her way to the convince store. It was a little chilly but nothing she couldn’t handle.
South Korea was safe after all so her being late out at night wasn’t a problem…well she thought.
It was when she was walking back to their apartments when she heard it. Footsteps. Footsteps that were following her and getting closer.
She had grocery bags in her hands that were extremely heavy and the fact that Hyunjin wasn’t there was worrying her a little bit.
She quickly turned and saw no one. Weird. Was she dreaming? She quickly started walking again but this time her footsteps got faster and so did the ones behind her.
“Excuse me miss?” She heard a rough voice calling for her. Her heart was beating at a terrible pace. Her hands were shaking.
She quickly looked behind before seeing who it was. It was a man, a scrubby looking man. He had a dirty smirk on his face and his hands were in his pocket.
“Can I help you?” She quietly said before taking a few steps back.
“Yes actually, I saw you shopping and I thought you were really-“
“Really what?” A voice growled from behind Y/n. She quickly jumped and looked up to see her pissed off boyfriend standing behind her. Towering both her and the man.
His hands automatically wrapped around her and that’s when she realized her surroundings. She was 2 blocks away from her and Hyunjin’s apartment. So this man really was following her.
“Is he your boyfriend?” The man asked in disbelief. His eyes grew wider, “Isn’t he famous?”
“I’d advise you leave before this gets ugly for you. I saw you following her and if I see you next to her ever again. I’ll make sure to break your hands off and beat you with them. Don’t think just because I sing and dance I can’t beat the shit out of you,”
Hyunjin stood infront of Y/n and pushed the man, he didn’t even try to fight Hyunjin but instead started to scurry off while cursing.
“Baby how-“
“Why the fuck are you out here in the night time without me?” He said sternly. His voice getting louder the more he talked.
He harshly grabbed the grocery bags from her hands.
“But I told you I was going grocery shopping Hyunjin plus-“
“You don’t leave the house without me at this time. You forget that you’re everyone’s target. Are you stupid?” He growled as he gently pushed her so they could start making their way to the apartments. He wanted to make sure he still had an eye on her even if he was extremely mad.
“I don’t know why you’re mad at me. I told you I was going to-“ she was hurt by his harsh words. She just wanted to explain herself.
“Then why the fuck were you not picking up my calls? Do you know how worried I got?” He was yelling now. “I told you to text me whenever your out so I know your safe, why don’t you listen Y/n,”
“Hyunjin I don’t know why your making this such a big deal but your scaring me,” she frowned as they made it inside their apartment. He slammed the door shut before throwing the bags of stuff on the dining table.
“Be careful there are eggs!” She yelped before running to check if they’re okay.
“Is that all you care about now?! You could have gotten hurt outside there. Raped! Robbed! Beaten!”
“Hyunjin stop yelling! It’s not a big deal! I always go shopping without you. Maybe your overreacting a little,” she begged for him to stop as she paced back out to the living room where he was now.
“I need to go think-“
“Think about what babe? I’m sorry okay. Just don’t leave. I- I promise I didn’t mean to. I thought you heard me when I told you I was leaving the house!”
“We need to find a way for you to be safe out there Y/n. Just let me think,”
He grabbed his jacket yet again and she chased after him clinging on his hand.
“God dammit Y/n!” He roared and raised his hand before punching the wall. She quickly flintched and fell on the floor thinking it would land on her.
She lets out a tiny squeal before shielding her head with her hands.
Hyunjin’s face quickly softens. His heart was in his throat. He couldn’t believe it. “Shit,” he softly said. His anger now slowly disappearing as guilt and worry filled his body.
“I’m so sorry baby,” he kept mumbling. He dropped his jacket and tried to grab her but she quickly scrambled away.
She was genuinely scared. She knew Hyunjin wouldn’t hit her but with the way he was reacting before she didn’t know what he was capable of at the moment.
“I- why?” She sniffled. Her eyes now streaming with tears and she quickly got off the floor and rushed to the bedroom.
Her sobs filled the room as she quickly dialed the only person she could think of.
“Channie?” She cried into the phone.
“Hm? What is it?” He frantically said as he heard her tit sniffles. “What’s wrong Y/nnie? You okay? Where are you?”
“Channie…Hyunjin he- he got angry and-“
“I’m coming over right now, stay there and stay away from him,” she could hear him shuffling around probably getting dressed. All she could do is cry.
On the other side of the door, Hyunjin was a crying mess. He didn’t expect the fight to turn left. He was going to hit her. He just blacked out for a second and her tiny screams woke him up he then realized what he had done.
“What is it Hyung?” He groaned as he sat by their bedroom door.
“Come over. Chan just called me fuming and I’m worried he’ll kill you if he finds you there,”
“But Binnie- I didn’t mean to I swear,”
“I just said come over. You need to calm down and we can talk about it okay?” He knew Changbin was right.
The comfort of knowing that Chan was on his way over was what made him leave the house not without knocking on their door first.
No answer.
He then slowly opened it to find the love of his life in a little ball. Tiny cries left her small frame but all he could do was walk over and kiss her forehead. She didn’t flinch but she didn’t react even and with that he left their shared apartment to head off to his friend’s house.
**
The frantic knocks on the door was what got her up. She knew it was Chan instantly and she honestly couldn’t wait for his cuddles.
“Where is he?” He marched into the house fuming.
“He- he left,” she said. Chan’s posture melted when he saw the state she was in. He felt so sorry and so bad but he knew apologizing wouldn’t do anything.
“Movie while you tell me what happened?” He pulled her into a hug as she broke down even more.
“Yes please,” she mumbled into his hoodie.
By the time the movie had ended, she was fast asleep by his side. It was a long 2 hours of him trying to calm her down and assuring her that Hyunjin didn’t mean what he did. It was probably a big misunderstanding. It took hours of convincing but he was finally able to get her to sleep and calm down.
When he heard the knock on the door he knew who it was and wasn’t shocked when the devil himself walked through the door.
“I won’t kill you,” was all Chan said before getting up and signaling for him to come hold her instead.
“Thank you Hyung, I owe you one,”
“I know you two are a young couple and it gets hard but you slowly learn how to be patient with her. I hope Binnie and leeknow told you that,”
“Trust me they gave me the longest lecture of my life and on top of that they took away all my pc privileges,” he huffed and slowly played with your hair.
“How is she?” He asked while admiring her face. It was still a little puffy and the guilt started to eat him again.
“Okay, she cried and cried but I finally got her to calm down. Just talk to her and apologize. She loved you at the end of the day,” and with that. They said their goodbyes and Hyunjin carried Y/n to their shared room. He slowly put her in bed before rushing to finish up putting the groceries away and cleaning up.
He made his way back to your room and got into bed to cuddle you but what made him smile was the way you wrapped your arms around him before whispering a tiny “I love you.”
Damn he was such a dickhead.
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lowkeyrobin · 2 days
Note
HII so I was reading your who you write for and saw you write for Charlie Bushnell, so I was wondering if I could get like reader and Charlie at like the an interview???
Thank you -🍄
hell yeah of course 🙏🙏 ; thank you 🍄anon, hope you enjoy 🫶🫶 ; i dunno how but this got a little off topic?? I apologize
CHARLIE BUSHNELL ; the interview
summary ; youre a journalist, he's an actor
warnings ; language, little cringe kissing scene (totally sfw dw)
disclaimers ; I said "scandalous ankles" because back in the olden days ankles and showing any skin was considered scandalous, for anyone who didn't know. reader is described to be not into fitness stuff, also don't mind me not knowing shit about fitness/weightlifting
word count ; 883
masterlist
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"Hi, welc-hum inside." You smile, waving to Charlie as he enters the room. You then cringe at yourself in embarrassment. "Sorry, hi, welcome." You awkwardly chuckle, "I apologize, my words are all tangled today"
"You're good" He waves, a comforting smile on his face. He wears a black t-shirt with a logo in the corner and design on the back, paired with some jorts and sneakers like he just came from the gym. You didn't mind though, you urged your guests to come comfortable over casual.
Video interviews that weren't in front of a live crowd were the best for both of you, thank God. Meeting this Godsend of a man nearly gave you a heart attack. Just looking at his gorgeous eyes and his perfect features, nothing was wrong with him whatsoever. He was genuinely a 10/10.
He sits down in the guest chair across from yours, watching you sift through a desk a few feet away, looking for something. Your dress pants rise at the ankles every time you make a step, revealing more of your scandalous ankles, covered by socks.
You finally sit down, apologizing for taking so long to find your notebook where you held a few questions and conversation starters. The cameras begin rolling, and you introduce yourself and Charlie as per usual.
"So, what's it like being on set, with all the cameras, lights, props, and green screens? What are the action scenes like?"
Charlie lightly smiles as he gives you an answer, using his hands to talk a little bit. He seemed a little tense and nervous, but you didn't point it out or blame him, it took you years to be fully comfortable where you sat.
"What even are you? Cause like, you're an interviewer but also a journalist, what do you prefer being called?" The curly haired boy asks you.
You shrug, "Journalist, I guess. Interviewer could be put like, inside the circle of journalism, I'd say. I'm a journalist before I'm an interviewer"
He nods, giving you a gorgeous smile that you had to quickly look away for. You discreetly hide your flushed face, looking down at your notebook.
You write down some memorable quotes as you sit and chat with him, bringing up some interesting conversation and learning more about being on set and the production behind media.
After the cameras are off, you thank him and invite him to stay for some aftertalk and lunch. You came in with a large bowl of taco salad you needed to finish before it went bad and were offering it to anyone who wanted it. He accepts the offer, staying back in the break room with you to eat some of that salad you'd brought in. In his words, it was very much better than whatever fast food he was going to go get before returning home.
Your conversation quickly turns into one regarding music and working out, although you weren't too into fitness, the occasional jog here and there keeping you healthy, apparently.
You both stand up, setting your bowls and forks in the dishwasher to get them cleaned. You stand against the counter as he leans his hand against it a couple feet away.
He pulls up his t-shirt sleeve, flexing his arm to show off his muscles. He's trying to impress you, mostly, but you had asked how frequently he worked out. Not his fault.
"Usually lift about 145"
You nod, paying more attention to his face than his muscles. Not exactly your question, but you'd take it.
"You okay?" He asks, seeing you zoned out staring at him.
"Yeah, sorry-"
"Am I that handsome to you?" He asks, lightly teasing you.
"Wh- I mean, hey now-"
He lightly giggles, stepping forward a bit.
You stare into his brown eyes, colored like a dark chocolate mocha. A smile tugs at the corners of his lips, seeing your eyes almost glimmer as they stare into his.
He's just a guy, you're an interviewer, a journalist. This is weird, isn't it? Is it not?
"May I?..." He whispers, looking down at your lips, then up at your eyes.
Triangle Theory.
You nod, a soft smile painting your face.
He quickly embraces your lips with his, hands resting on your waist. You melt into his kiss, your bodies tied together. He picks you up, hands resting behind your thighs, placing you on the counter.
You quickly pull away, hands on his shoulders as he stands between your legs. "Okay, what the fuck? Do that again"
He smiles, looking up at you. His arms are now loosely wrapped around your hips and waist area, his curls falling into place like dominoes.
"You're an interesting one"
"Says you, actor guy"
"Don't try and play me at my own game"
You open your mouth to speak, but shut yourself up, seeing the smug look on his face.
He holds your left hand in his right, a slight panic running through both of your heads as he rubs your knuckles with his thumb.
You speak up now, finding your stomach filled with butterflies.
"You make me want to grab a dictionary and manually find the words I'm looking for to describe you and how attractive that was."
He lightly laughs, kissing your hand.
"Whatever you say, journalist"
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bethelighthalazia · 3 days
Text
Ruined everything!
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Summary:  Jealousy takes the better of your boyfriend and the stress of the last days just makes him say things he regrets.
Genre: angst (?), fluff (?)
Pairing: bf!Hongjoong X fem!reader
Word Count:  604
Warnings: none
[note: It's just a little drabble, but i saw this gif and it just gave me this tiny bit idea which i just had to write down ^^’]
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© by bethelighthalazia. Do not repost, copy or translate. Unless stated otherwise, those works are mine and born from my own ideas. I don't have any claim on the mentioned real existing Idols whatsoever.
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Laughing, you stood aside with Seonghwa, who was taking his break from shooting. You had brought coffee for everyone and waited with him for all the others to take their break too, although when Hongjoong comes up to you, he already looks a bit moody. It doesn't stop you from holding his coffee towards him with a smile.
“Hey Joong, here's your coffee. Seonghwa said you didn't have one y-” Before you could finish your sentence though, one of the members accidentally bumps against you while talking to the others and causes you to drop Hongjoong's coffee. Unfortunately, it spills onto his outfit. You tried to catch the cup and when you look up into his face, you actually wince, his expression more than angry.
“Great, y/n! Now I have to get changed and the staff has even more work!” Hongjoong huffs out, grabbing the tissues from your hand harshly before you hurry to get more tissues. “Hongjoong, it's fine, the stain is not as big, we can fix it.” Seonghwa tries to calm the captain, but for some reason, this seems to anger him just even more. “Yeah, of course you stand up for her, huh? How about you take her then? Don't need a stupid girlfriend who ruins everything all the time!”
These words feel like a slap in your face and the moment Hongjoong turns and sees you standing there, he feels horrible for saying it. Of course he loves you, but the day had stressed him so much, he lost his patience and let it out on you. “Y/n, I-” He started, but cut himself off, noticing the tears that had appeared in your eyes. 
You didn't want to hear it, your week already had been shit and now your boyfriend says this? Before anyone could react, you throw the tissues at him and turn around, leaving the set, running. It just had to happen someday, Hongjoong is an idol and you are just a normal girl, so why should one like him love you?
It didn't take long for your phone to blow up, the boys asking you to come back and that your boyfriend didn't mean it. When Hongjoong called, you declined the call and turned off your phone for now. If he truly wanted to find you,he knew where you would go. The only place, you always felt safe and comfortable, even though without him, it felt cold.
Hours went by, you had curled up on the chair in his studio, and when Hongjoong entered it, you had fallen asleep from crying. When he saw you there, his heart stopped for a moment, thankful that you didn't leave completely. Carefully, he laid a blanket over you before sending the boys a text, letting them know that he found you. 
“Y/n…I'm so sorry for what I said. I never meant it…” He whispered, his fingers gently caressing your temple, then he carefully lifted you out of the chair to settle down on the little sofa with you in his arms. “D- don't leave me, joongie…” Your voice was quiet and sleepy as you shuffled in his arms without waking up, bringing a sad smile to Hongjoong's lips. 
“I would never leave you, y/nnie…I love you too much for that. You are my best friend, my muse, my treasure. And I'm so sorry for hurting you with my words. I swear, this will never happen again.” He whispered, followed by endless quiet apologies until the captain also fell asleep, his arms wrapped around you in fear of losing you because of his stupid words.
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taglist: @mingis-mizu, @tinyelfperson
(if you want to be added to a taglist, follow the taglist-link in my pinned post)
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bepp-ers · 2 days
Text
sorry for vanishing on yall i went to take a nap (for like 9 months)
headcanons about the obey me! brothers and the devildom that no-one asked for, in no particular order. because why not :)
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> asmodeus is kind of against piercings that aren't in the ear because they're 'tacky' and unsavoury.
> mammon had an aeroplane phase. he eventually settled on cars, but there are still a few plane magazines stashed in his wardrobe.
> lucifer has grey hair but like. way more than you'd think. he's just really good at hiding it. he may or may not have used some sort of magic to hide it, until eventually he gives up and starts to let it show. that's why in some artwork/pictures he has grey streaks, and in some he has none.
> beelzebub has tried to eat so many of the paintings in the HoL that they have to be sealed with magic, lest he devour another family portrait.
> barbatos' tail is "slimy" or "slick" because it's actually poisonous, like those frogs. that's why he doesn't like people touching it, except for that one picture where Solomon tries to touch it (i reckon he got tired of him trying to touch it so he just allows him to be poisoned lmao)
> demons will eat humans. this is a known fact, although it's usually only very low-level demons who are starving, or have succumbed to their sins completely who eat humans. beelzebub has thought about it a few times but he likes MC far too much to truly consider eating them.
> expanding on the last point, the Devildom is overpopulated. im calling it. i headcanon that demons (particularly glutton demons) casually partake in cannibalism. there are too many demons/other species and as such, the laws basically don't exist. the answer to overpopulation is basically murder, or cannibalism.
> the brothers don't try and tone down the more "demon" elements of themselves around MC until someone mentions that humans don't really like that kind of thing. MC has seen some SHIT man.
> leviathan refuses to eat fish or seafood because of Henry 2.0. mammon has 100% tricked him into eating like a fishcake or something. he definitely cried a lot that day.
> i think all of the brothers snore, except for belphegor (ironic huh). asmodeus adamantly denies snoring, but he does. mammon snores the loudest obviously. everyone else just snores a normal amount, and lucifer falls asleep in his chair/on the sofa a lot so his snoring is heard the most. he's a dad at heart.
> satan hates that people mistake him for lucifer. that's obvious. he hates it so much that he once wrote a book on the subject, under a pen name, and it was surprisingly popular. he doesn't think anyone knows he wrote it, but lucifer knows. he simply never said anything because he was secretly proud of satan for how well he could write.
hopefully these make sense. god i forgot just how much this game actually made me think. i love world building yarhhhhggh
> asmodeus is deathly afraid of head lice. that's it that's the headcanon.
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oh yeah the ole ask box is open. send me asks im so desperate ill take anything
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thenewausten · 1 day
Note
PART 2 OF GHOST PLACE PLEASE 🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻
Thanks for the request!
Ghostface!Quackity [Part 2]
Part 1: here!
TW: smut 🔞
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You were at the University with some of your friends and they were talking about the Ghostface and his last attack on Sunday after he left your house. "I bet he's a 'fuckin weirdo, like, a nerd or 'somethin." One of your friends would say and laugh. "Probably a freaky, man." Your best friend would say. "Or a virgin."
"Yeah!" She answers and laughs. "What do you think, Y/N?" She asks to you and you shrug. "I don't know, uh..."
"Oh, c'mon! He's a sociopath, you have to say 'somethin mean about him." Your friend says and you laugh. "Fine, he's an asshole." You say, feeling a little guilty. The boy treated you so good in the two times you saw each other, you didn't want to say anything mean about him. Your friends celebrate and laugh when you say it. "Yeah, Ghostface is an asshole!" They say it out loud and laugh, you smile to them, a little bit uncomfortable.
The day went well at University and as soon as you got home, you decided to take a bath. You took advantage of your parents not being on the house to put some music on Alexa and decided to watch a horror movie after.
You watch the popcorn pop in the pan as the phone rings, you grab it. "Hello?" You ask. "Hello, princesa." You hear his voice from the phone and smile. "Hi." You whisper. "What are you doing, Y/N?" He knows what you're doing because he's watching you. "Uh, popcorn?!" You answer, with a smile on your face. "Uhm, why?" He asks you. "Gonna watch a movie." You say, turning off the fire and grabbing a bowl to put the popcorn. "How was your day at the University, love?"
"It was good, I guess. I mean, normal, you know?!" You answer, the boy stays in silence for a while. "Hello???" You ask, putting the pan at the sink so you can deal with it later. "So, I heard you say that I'm an asshole, mi vida." You shiver with his voice on your ear and turn around to see that 'fuckin mask. "How did you get in?!" You ask, so confused, more than scared of him. "Well, I'm a murderer, princesa, I have my tricks." He grabs the knife, he's not longer with the phone on his hand, the knife on your thigh, roaming through your body. "I didn't mean to say it. My friends made me do it, Alex." The boy told you his name yesterday after you beg for it, and, of course, because he wanted to hear you moaning it. "Oh, yeah?! They made you do it, uh?" He approaches you and you nod, the knife on your neck. "Please, Alex."
"It's okay, hermosa." The boy pins you against the counter with his own body, the knife passing slowly against your throat. "I won't kill you." He takes off the knife of your throat and puts it aside, holding your chin so strongly that you whine. "But I'm watching you, princesa. Say that I'm an asshole again and I'll kill all of your 'fuckin friends in front of you. I don't want to make you suffer, corazón, so don't you 'fuckin ask for it, okay?" The authoritarianism in his voice makes you shiver and clench your thighs together. "I'm sorry, 'Lex." You whisper. "I didn't mean to..." He ignores you and slides three of his gloved fingers inside of your mouth, just like he did at the first night. "I said it's okay, amor. Don't need to talk too much." You nod, the boy pushes his fingers against your mouth. "Suck it just like you did with my cock yesterday." He says and you obey. Alex pulls down your pajama shorts with your soaked panties, taking his fingers out of your mouth and sticking them in your entrance. You moan with the feeling of the texture of the glove against your walls. "Shit." You whimper as soon as Alex starts to move his fingers on your pussy. "It's so good, uh?!" You grab his clothes. "Please, more!" You beg and he smiles behind the mask. "Whatever you want, amor." He whispers and pushes his fingers against your core harder than before, you throw your head on his shoulder. "Fuck, Alex!" You moan, biting his flesh as he thrusts his fingers into you. "I'm so close! Please, don't stop!" You ask him, the boy holds you against the counter and kneel in front of you. He lifts the mask just to suck on your clit, his lips so softly against your pussy as his fingers fuck you 'till you can't take it anymore, coming and moaning his name as you do it. You look at Alex as he takes his gloved fingers inside of you, his mouth on your entrance right after that, making you moan and squirm. "You have such a delightful cunt, Y/N." He whispers as his tongue enters your hole, making you whine and grab the edge of the counter. Alex grabs your right leg and puts it on his shoulder, having a better vision of your core. "So beautiful." He whispers, his tongue on your clit again, sucking it harshly, making you moan and whimper. "Slow down, Alex, it's too sensitive!" You ask him and the boy doesn't seem to care. "You can take it, mi vida. Accept what I give to you." He says and you whine, closing your eyes as you moan his name. "Want you to cum on my mouth, amor." He says and you nod, getting closer as Alex devours your pussy, your legs start to shake and involuntarily close as you cum again, the masked boy licking all of your wetness and 'givin little kisses all over your pussy. "Let's go upstairs, I'm not done with you yet." He says as he gets up and you obey, following the Ghostface upstairs.
He opens the first door. "Here." He says. "That's not my bedroom, Alex, it's my paren..." You start and he pushes you to get into the bedroom. "Alex! I won't fuck on my parent's bedroom." You protest and he laughs. "Jesus, how much moral you have, Y/N." He mocks you. "It's not my fault if you don't have any!" You say, Alex smirks and closes the door behind him, he locks it and grabs the key. "Don't be a 'fuckin hypocritical, corazón. You're 'fuckin me, uh? Or you forgot who am I?" He approaches you as he hides the key on his clothes, the boy grabs his knife and points it to you. "Fuck you, Alex. Open the door." He approaches you even more, his knife on your waist as he pushes you to the bed. "Alex..." You start. "Shh, obey me, take your little shirt, baby." You do what he says. "That's it, amor. Don't disobey me, uh?" Alex positions the handle of his knife in your entrance. "Alex, what are yo..." He pushes it onto your hole, watching your reaction. "I won't hurt you, mi vida. Don't worry about it." He whispers and you nod, he thrusts the handle of his knife deep in your cunt and you moan. "Fuck." You whisper and Alex smiles. "Look at you, baby..." He starts. "Getting this little pussy of yours fucked by my knife." You moan his name, making him laugh. "Such a good girl, uh?" He asks. "C'mon, princess." He makes you lay down on the bed, climbing onto you. "You're soaking my knife, amor. Are you that wet?!" He mocks as he watches the knife fucks your cunt. "Does it feels good?!" He asks and you nod desperately. "Yeah?! Does it?!" He asks again. "Yes, Alex, please!" You moan and his lips touches your nipple. "Fuck!" You hold the boy's hair. "Don't stop, Alex!"
"Gonna cum in my knife, Y/N?! That's how much you care about who I'm, baby?" The boy holds your chin and makes you look at his mask. "That's how much you're a 'fuckin hypocritical, right?!" You whine, grabbing his wrist. "Alex!" You moan his name and he groans, disappointed. "That's not the answer, hermosa. Want me to stop?"
"No, please. You're right, Alex! Don't stop!" You say, tears on your eyes as you moan loudly. The boy makes you cum for the third time tonight. "So pretty." He whispers as he takes the knife out of your entrance and cleans it on the sheets of your parent's bed. You smile at him and sit on the bed, leaning on your elbows. "Can I ask you 'somethin?" You ask him and he nods, climbing onto you, his mask millimeters from your face. "Can you kiss me?!" You ask, his mouth is the only part of his face you see, you notice a little scar on his upper lip. "I can't kiss you with my mask on." He whispers. "Take it off." You say and he laughs. "I can't."
"Why not?! You don't trust me, 'Lex?!" You ask him. "It's not that, amor." He says and you sit properly. "You don't want to kiss me, then?!" Alex gives to your naked body a good look, looking at your eyes again. "Really?!" He asks. "Of course I want, princess." You smile and approach his mask. "Please, Alex. I want to see your face." You try to reach his mouth, but the stupid mask stops you. "Argh." You groan in frustration and he laughs. "Please, 'Lex. I want to kiss you."
"I don't want to kill you if you accidentally tell to your friends my identity, corazón." He whispers. "I won't do it." You protest. "I don't want you to get hurt, don't you see that I 'fuckin like you?!" Tears scape from your eyes and Alex pulls you closer. "You like me, uh?" He asks, a smirk on his lips. "So much." You whisper. "Gonna show you my face, baby. Promise me you won't tell anyone?!" He says and you nod. "I promise, Alex."
The boy gets up and starts with his gloves, then, his black cape. You see his normal clothes: black button-up shirt, black pants and black combat boots. God, he's hot. You watch him take a lot of small knife's from the pockets of his pants. "Jesus, Alex." You whisper. "I'm a murderer, hermosa. Don't forget that." He answers and takes the Ghostface mask. Fuck. "You're so handsome." You whisper and the boy approaches you with a smile on his face. "Thanks." You grab his shirt, 'makin him almost fall on top of you. "Careful, hermosa." He whispers. "Sorry, 'Lex." You kiss his lips and smile to him. "I already saw you at University." You whisper, one of the boy's hand grabbing your waist, the other roams freely through your body. "Yeah, I know it." He whispers. "I always thought you were hot." You confess to him and he laughs. "I noticed all the looks, you know?!" He says, a smirk on his lips. "I always wanted you to be my girl, Y/N." He whispers. "I'm yours, Alex."
"Are you?!" He asks. "I am." You whisper and connect your lips with his in a very intense kiss, your hands work on Alex's shirt to unbutton it as his own hands works on his pants. "C'mon, princess. Get on all fours for me, uh?" He gives you a order and you obey. "You're mine." He whispers as he slaps your ass. "Fu- Fuck." You whine and the boy smiles, his hardened cock already on your entrance. "Gonna fuck the shit out of you at your parents bedroom, corazón." He mocks. "Or you still don't want that, baby?" Alex provokes you. "I... I want it, 'Lex" You whisper, desperate for him to thrust into your cunt. "Yeah?! Of course you want it, amor." He says as he pushes onto you, making the both of you moan from the pleasure. "Always so good to be fucked, baby." He says as he starts to thrust his hips against your ass, the feeling's so good that you grab the sheets of the bed with your hands, squeezing it.
One more time, Alex's making the headboard hits the wall as he fucks your pussy, his hands on your hips, holding you strongly and marking your skin with his digits. Your moans fill the room with his groans and whines, the boy slaps your ass for the second time as his dick goes deeply on your soaked cunt. "Alex, please!" You beg him. "Hold on a little, hermosa." He says as a command, his thrusts becoming slouchier. "I can't!" You whine and cum, your whole body tingles as your orgasm reaches yourself, Alex holds you in place as your legs shake. "Jesus, Y/N! Gonna cum inside of you, amor." He moans, the feeling of your walls so tightly and wet around his cock makes him lose himself. "Fuck." He moans and thrusts his hips 'till he fills your pussy up with his cum. "You're such a good girl for me, baby." He whispers as he approaches your face. "Say again that you're mine, princess." He orders. "I'm yours, Alex." You whispers, the boy gives you a peck on the lips. "That's it, mi vida." The boy fixes his clothes. "Can you stay?!" You ask. "Of course, amor. Let me take care of you, uh?!" You nod as his arms grabs your waist and hold you in bridal style.
After Alex makes you a bath, he cleans the mess you both made on your parents bedroom and wait for you downstairs. "Let's watch a horror movie, pleasee?!" You approach him as he nods. "Sure, amor."
You sit on the sofa together, all the lights are turned off and you both eat the popcorn you made earlier, watching a movie about a masked guy that kills people at his University.
Thank you for reading, I hope you enjoy the writing! :)
Requests are open!
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jealousjersey · 3 days
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₊࿔*:・୧”too sweet”₊˚࿔*:・୧
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pairing // mike schmidt x gn!reader fluff
mentions // purely fluff just some nice and sweet content, pet names, reader is overwhelmed and stressed with everything and mike uplifts you, y/n isn’t mentioned, reader in college, reader and mike are in a situationship, mentions of being cheated on by past shitty gender unspecified partner
1.4k wc
tags // mike schmidt x reader fluff, purely fluff fic, pet names, slight angst
authors note // yes this is inspired by too sweet by hozier i’ve played it 18 times today (still listening to it) also per request (ty anon) fluff
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school is kicking your ass. the lectures are too long and not informative at all, although you’ve had exams all week, they never seem to contain the information you’re supposedly learning.
you don’t even live on campus so you constantly feel like you’re missing out on important events and information. it’s truly exhausting.
that is until you get home, you’ve been in a situationship with this security guard worker, mike. you’ve talked and had dates, even had sex a few times but it doesn’t suffice you. you were made to be a lover, but right now you’re just a piece of ass. you want mike to love you, well, right now it feels more than a need. you want to finally receive the love that you give.
once your classes are done, you leave campus. taking the subway back to your apartment, luckily you don’t live too far, but not close enough to walk. and instead of wasting gas on driving to and from school, so why not take the safer option and just take the train?
as you arrive at your apartment, you finally get to lay down on your bed. you feel a tear fall from your eyes but you’re not sure why. today wasn’t too bad…but your body’s reaction is telling you different. you check the time and wait-
it’s the 2 year anniversary of your ex cheating on you, well atleast it’s the anniversary of the day you found out. you check the date and you get flashbacks, flashbacks to you coming to surprise them at their house for your 1 year together.
you arrive with tickets to some indie concert in hand. but instead you were practically hit in the face with realization as you saw her. she looked…perfect. you still wonder how they ended up with her. but let’s face it, you knew there was signs. but you chose to ignore them.
as of now, you’re laying face down on your bed, basically crying at this point. your breath hitches as you just lay there, helpless. until suddenly
knock knock
“hey? anyone here?” you hear a familiar voice enter your house. it’s mike schmidt, the man you’ve been talking to for a few months. wait a second-
“how did you get in?” you question. you thought you locked the door but apparently not.
“oh, the door was halfway open. wanted to check to see if you were being robbed” he says as he gets a good look at you “shit are you okay?” he asks worried, staring at your puffy face, your swollen eyes as tears leak from them.
his worry makes you feel better. you’ve waited on somebody to actually care about how you were, not just ask without remorse in their eyes. but mike actually cares, and it feels good. it feels like he gives you a little sliver of comfort.
“yeah, i’m fine…schools kicking my ass and-” you cut yourself off, he’s just a fling, why does he get to know your personal problems? but something inside you just tells you to come clean. “2 years ago today i went through hell with my ex. he cheated and things went…down from there you could say.” you open up, not wanting to share anything that could bring back more deep memories- maybe mentioning the abuse would be too far.
“oh baby, i’m sorry. you need me here with you? i can get take out and we can watch one of your weird cartoons” he says. you chuckle. does he mean anime? you don’t even watch it that much, maybe he’s basing his suspicions on the death slayer poster in your room that you got because it looked cool. i mean, you only watched a episode or two. it might make you a poser but it looks good in your room so what’s the harm?
“yeah, take out sounds great. and we can just watch a movie or something.” you smile at his request, your eyes still puffy. mike notices this and sits next to you on your bed, bringing a hand to your cheek as he gently brushes a thumb over your eye bags, taking in the darkness.
“i’m gonna be right back, you want take out chinese food?” he asks with a smile as he presses a kiss onto your cheek. you slightly nod.
“gotta use your words baby” he teases you. “yes, chinese food is perfect” you smile “amazing, i’ll be back in 30. don’t fall asleep” he says as he points a finger in your direction and smiles softly
30 minutes pass, you just stay in your bed until he arrives, he walks in without knocking. “baby, i’m here” he yells, arms full with bags of chinese food. god, how much did he get?
you silently laugh to yourself at the site: mike with both hands carrying giant take out bags that say “thank you” with a smile face, his keys on his mouth and his pinky closing the door. it’s…really funny to be honest.
you snap out of your daze and run to help him, taking the bags out his hands and placing them on your kitchen island. you see him huff out a short breath, taking the keys out of his mouth and hanging them on the key holder.
you place a short kiss on his lips “thank you love” you say. a blush creeps onto his face. he wonders why he’s feeling so intense at your small gesture, i mean it’s not like you two are official….
you two get cuddled up on the couch together. he always said your couch is weird, two seats with a middle compartment in the center, dividing the chairs. he says it’s not ideal for cuddling but you make it work, the chairs aren’t small per say, but you can both fit on k it with ease, kicking up the leg so you can both lay comfortably.
you put on some movie that was recommended through the roku app. it doesn’t matter what movie it was, it just matters that you had mike with you.
soon enough he’s yawning, the mint aroma coming from his mouth isn’t bad. it’s kinda nice. before he could close his mouth fully you kiss him gently, wanting more of that mint taste. he returns the kiss, using the same pace you started.
as you let go, you ask the dreaded question. “do you want to be with me? romantically?” he stops and freezes before speaking. “honey, you’re too good for me- i..i’m not the best person. you’re full of love, i don’t want you to waste it on me, you’re too sweet for me.” he says. you look confused, you know you want to love him. why isn’t he accepting?
“but i want to be with you. i want to love you, and if im being honest i think i kind of already do.” you say after a moment.
“you…really?” he looks confused, almost baffled by your statement. do you really want to love him? like fully and truly?
“god yes mike, I try not to call but there��s some days that i really, really want to. i want to hear your voice, i want to hear you laugh. hell, i even want to smell your cologne. but i stop myself because i know you want something casual.” you blurt out.
“who said i wanted casual? baby i was waiting for you to say that. i think ive been in love with you since we first started talking. it sounds cheesy i know, but i really do.” he responds, making your heart flutter for a moment as you blink, suddenly feeling his breath against your ear.
“i only want you” he whispers, putting emphasis on only. immediately you blush more than ever in his presence. “really?” you can’t help but whisper back. is this really happening? are you about to have a boyfriend?
“really. you are the only person i ever want to be with. promise” he says as he puts his pinky out, asking for yours. sealing it with a pinky promise. he knows you’re serious about those so him doing this for you means a lot.
“you’re the only person i want to be with mike, has been that way since i think i first spoke to you. were so dumb” you laugh.
“yeah but we’re dumb together” he chuckles back as he holds you closer to him.
“so….are we dating or what?” you ask, popping your lips after “so”.
“let me ask you” he fixes his messy hair and uses a takeout napkin as a tie around his neck. “would you like to date me” he says sincerely, still a hint of laughing under his voice.
“fuck it, sure” you laugh as you bury yourself into his neck.
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sotibas · 1 day
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your first time hooking up w q? maybe you were friends before or something
i don't think alex is the type to have sex with random people, so you two must definitely be really close to each other first!
as usual, you two went out together, but this time a few bottles of beer were involved,,
it was already late at night, he was walking on the sidewalk next to you. alex nudged your arm with his elbow, his voice was a bit slurred “m’ gonna sleep at your house tonight.”
“huh? who invited you in the first place?” you chuckled, “you know you don't have a choice” he smirked, then wrapped one arm around your shoulders, you proceeded to wrap one around his waist, “yeah... i know.”
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alex makes himself at home as he jumps on your bed, burying his face into your pillows. “alex!! for god sake, take off your shoes at least!”, you tug his shoes until you manage to take them off, he rolls his eyes, but you can't see it.
“i like you better when you shut up” he mumbles against the mattress, “oh, fuck you” you say before walking out of the room “huh? wait, where are you going?” he follows you to the kitchen, rubbing his eyes.
“m’ thirsty” as you opened the fridge, his eyes perked up and he was quick to grab a bottle of wine from it “wait, alex, no!” you tried to push the bottle back.
“oh c’mon, lemme drink a little bit!” he pouts at you, “you already drank a lot today, lex...” he whines softly, burying his face into your neck “please?”
you can feel him breathing in your scent, a hand holding your waist. he knows how to get what he wants. “well... yeah, i guess...”
your heart almost skips a beat when he pulls his face away to look at you. you never saw him this beautiful before, it was like you were mesmerized by him.
he couldn't look away from you either, his eyes glancing towards your lips, he didn't even realize that he was leaning closer to you so naturally.
a wave of shock went through your body as his lips locked on yours. alex felt like his heart would come out of his mouth, he couldn't believe what just happened.
after a few seconds staring at each other, you couldn't help but giggle shyly, making him grin in relief. you proceeded to kiss him again, and he didn't think twice before leaving the stupid bottle aside to wrap his arms around you.
he tasted like the beer you two just drank an hour ago, but you didn't care about it. his tongue slipping into your mouth just made you want more and more from him.
“y’know, i don't think i really want that wine anymore” alex says when he pulls away, feeling his face getting warmer.
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alex gets on top of you in bed, your lips locked on each other while his hands roam over your body. it feels good when thick fingers slip under your shirt to feel your skin.
“you feel good” he mumbles, and you bite your lip when he kisses your jaw, “mmh, can we..?”
you nod, fingers grabbing his dark hair. “yeah, want you, lex...” your words sent a wave of pleasure through his body and he almost moans, “want you too, princesa, so bad.”
a moan escapes from your lips when his pink tongue meets your nipple, he grabs and squeezes your pretty tits while pressing kisses all over them, you can tell he's loving every second of it, so are you.
you help him to undo his pants and underwear, taking a look at his cock for the first time, it's thick, tanned, with a sensitive tip, it twitches when you grasp it. “can i suck you off?” he almost cums when you ask him this. “ohmygod, yes, yes..!”
you take him down your throat, his fingers gripping your hair as he whimpers and leans his head back “mmh..! fuck, your mouth feels so- oh shit!” he whines, panting slightly when you pull out, “so good, baby” he manages to speak.
you're both naked when he gets on top of you again, your legs spreading immediately for him, he couldn't help but grin at you, squeezing your thigh, “do you have a condom here?” you nod, pointing to the side table.
he places the condom around his cock, before getting between your legs, his tone is gentle when he asks “gonna fuck you now, ‘kay?”
“yeah, ‘kay... oh!” your mouth hangs open when his tip teases your entrance, and you gasp when his cock sinks down into your pussy.
alex feels like he's in heaven; you realize that your pussy was made to take his cock. he thinks the same way.
whimpers and moans fill up the room as skins hits each other. alex buries his face between your tits as he savours every second of fucking you.
“so tight, oh my fuck-” he thrusts into your cunt, whimpering against your skin, “mygod, you feel so, so good, lex..!”
he leans close to kiss your lips again and he keeps fucking you, while you suck on his lower lip. it brings him to the edge and he moans against your mouth “mierda, i'm so close, baby.”
soft lips remain locked on yours as you feel yourself getting closer to your release as well, “oh-! fuckk, alex!”
you let out a gasp, trembling under him as you cum. his mouth opens and he grunt, thrusting into you a few more times before filling up the condom with his warm cum.
alex falls over you, burying his face into your neck as he pants. his arms are wrapped around you when he looks up at your face “was it good for you?” his tone is soft and his messy hair makes him even more beautiful.
you can't help but grin “it sure was, i loved it” your fingers brush his hair out of his face and he smiles back, almost melting into your touch “i'm glad, because i loved it too,”
he keeps looking at you as you caress him, “i love you.” he completes the sentence, making your heart flutter, “i love you too, alex.” and you really do.
he kisses your forehead before pulling out to get rid of the condom. when he comes back you get into his arms, and you both snuggle up with each other the whole night.
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privitivium · 2 days
Note
reader pinning motherly and fatherly!yan against each other to have some alone time/go out with friends
imagine their reactions when they realize they got bamboozled‼️
reader just like 🗣"fatherly!yan tried some of your food when I went to the bathroom and he said you can't cook for shit"
🗣"motherly!yan said that they're going to find me a new job because you're so smothering"
loved this idea and now i can finally share my own thoughts... motherly/fatherly shenanigans. hoorayy!!
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ㅡeating dinner. it wasn't tense, but it was quiet... mither across from you, staring at you as though to gauge your emotions,,, "... dad tried your food." you mention casually, at lunch you explained - and immediately he was boiling!!! but you wanted to share... but he also had to explain that he made that specifically for you- "he says it... needs a little seasoning." you continue, swallowing. nonchalantly... WHAT? that fucking guy saying that HE needs to add m-more spice-? more flavor??!?!?!!! "... finish up, honey." he hums delicately.,,,
ㅡbecoming sick of his smothering is all... shaking your arm to get your attention, and mumbling without failㅡ"ugh... mother said that hes gonna find me a new job because youre so damn clingy." its not like mother was any better - but he didnt need to know that. and... it was your own words. but he didnt need to know that. "what-? he said that?!" he yelps, standing - he couldnt believe the lies being fed to his darling little angel busy bee ??-?+!!!! "... yes." you narrow your eyes, raising your eyebrows unsurelyㅡ"t-that... bastard." his voice growing quieter as he leaves the room abruptly - snickering to yourself. all brawn, huh?! sneaking off - following after father before making a turn down the hallway. it'll give you some time to yourself for a few... hopefully, hours.
with the yanduo... "my baby spreading lies? how could he ,,," in disarray after they nearly tried to maul each other. after making sure the other never really said anything about food - or applying to different jobs, and with mothers brains... it was rather easy to tell that you pit them against each other for alone time seeing as you were no where to be seen. they'll give you just that, but they won't be treating you too kindly when you come out of your hiding place..,,,, yeah.
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miley1442111 · 19 hours
Text
back to chicago-c.berzatto
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a/n: i'm probably going to make this two parts (or more) because I really like this idea so this is part 1. i imagined a fem reader and it's mentioned quite a few times but as usual, imagine what you like. SET AFTER SEASON 2
summary: a double date with your boyfriend at the Bear can only go well, right?
pairings: carmenberzatto x femreader (complicated relationship), platonicthe bear x reader, romantic oc x reader
warnings: general angst, mentions of mikeys death
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You and Carmen had grown up together, living across the street from one another. Your childhoods were wildly different, his filled with family drama and personal independence. Yours filled with absent parents and the necessity of independence. You went to school together, went to prom together (as ‘friends’), and you were each other's first kiss. Then, you went off to college for law and business and he went off to cook. You vowed to never go back to Chicago, but stayed in contact with Mikey until he died. Then you came back. You felt a debilitating need to see Mikey off. Watch him be put into the ground. You had hoped Carmen would show up. He didn’t. 
You had stayed in Chicago, you had the time and money. Being a successful lawyer in New York was a great gig. Straight out of college you’d gotten a job at a top law firm, and just last year you were made partner. Taking time off for personal reasons wasn’t questioned. Even if it had happened a year ago. Even though you were in Chicago purely for the reason of nostalgia. You’d gone last year for the funeral and this time it was just because something in you missed it. 
It felt good to breathe in the Chicago air again as you walked down the darkened streets, ready for a date at a new Chicago restaurant, The Bear. It was where The Beef had been. Devastating how someone just came in and wrecked all of Mikey’s work. You thought to yourself as you opened the door and searched for the man you were meeting. Adrian, an accountant you’d met at a jazz club, was a nice man. He was sweet and reliable, funny and kind and you both got along well. He was never too handsy and always on time… but you still feared full commitment. He waved you over and you sat beside him as he pressed a kiss to your lips, you smiled, greeting his friends. This ‘double date’ thing had been his idea. This restaurant had been his idea, and as you stared Richie Jerimovich in the face, a shocked dumb-founded look on his face, you remembered why you left Chicago in the first place You remembered Carmen always wanted to call his restaurant ‘The Bear’ and you remembered that there was no getting out of this. 
Shit. 
“Do you two know each other?” Adrian asked, a hand on your shoulder, pulling you back to reality. 
“Fuck yeah we do! Cousin, how are you?” Richie smiled, forgoing the formalities and pulling you out of your seat and into a hug. 
“Richie, how are you?” You mustered up your best fake smile, trying to keep the gaze of Adrian’s friends unsuspicious. 
“I’m great Bug, how are you?” he asked, using the wretched nickname you endured for all those years. 
“Bug?” Adrian smiled. 
“Childhood nickname,” you explained quickly. “I’m good, Rich, real good.”
“You're a fancy lawyer now huh? What was it, New York right?” 
“That’s right,” you smiled. You couldn’t ruin this dinner. Adrian had flown all the way from New York to see you. This was the first time in a month that he’d seen you. Adrian’s friends had to like you. You had to make them like you.
“Sugar’s going to freak out when she sees you,” Richie smiled. You followed Nat on instagram, but refused to like any of her pictures, not wanting her to reach out. You knew she was pregnant. “You won’t believe it, she’s pregnant!”
“Oh my god! I must congratulate her,” you smiled, not realising what that tiny statement would bring.
“I’ll take you to the back now! I’ll give the rest of you guys the tour after,” he smiled at the rest of the table and they seemed to be excited by the prospect of seeing the kitchen so you plastered on a smile, kissed Adrian’s cheek, and let Richie lead the way. 
As you edged closer to the kitchen, you could hear voices, but thankfully not Carmen’s. You turned a corner, pushed through the door behind Richie, and you were led to a small office. Inside sat Natalie ‘Sugar’ Berzatto, ‘Uncle Jimmy’, and Carmen fucking Berzatto. You let out a breath.
“Look who came in to say hi,” Richie announced, stepping to the side to stop covering you. Sugar and Jimmy’s eyes lit up and they immediately started to hug you, yet Carmen stayed frozen to his spot against the wall.
“My love, how’s New York?” Jimmy asked, his arms around you. 
“It’s great, everything I wanted,” you smiled. Your life was something you felt you could be proud of. You loved New York and you loved your job. You had great friends, friends that were practically family. You had Adrian, he was great and he loved you. Yet you still thought about the Berzattos daily. “Congratulations Natalie!” You turned to her, hugging her side due to her large bump. 
You exchanged small talk back and forth with Jimmy and Sugar as Richie and Carmen whispered in the corner. You couldn’t make out what they were saying but it worried you. 
—----------------------------------------------------------------------------
carmen
There you were. Standing there, fucking glowing. And here I was, a stained white t-shirt on and a pair of fucking jeans on. You looked beautiful, the type of beautiful that would make me jealous of the guy you were going home to if I saw you walking down the street. What were you doing here? Why the fuck were you standing in my office, looking so damn beautiful, yet so unattainable?
“She’s here with a guy,” Richie whispered into my ear. 
“What?” I scoffed. 
“She’s here with a guy!” He whispered louder. I felt my blood boil. So you’re here, in my fucking restaurant, with some other fucking guy. Awesome. I searched your hands for an engagement ring, or worse, a wedding ring. I saw none and my ears refocused into the room. 
“So?” I sighed, feigning disinterest.
“ ‘So’? Your fucking girl is with another guy. In your restaurant!” Richie snapped. 
“She’s not my fucking girl anymore, stop talking outta your ass,” I shoved him, making him leave me alone. My words were deflections. Of course you were my fucking girl, you always would be. You were perfection personified in my eyes, even with any of your flaws. And I wanted you to be my girl, but I got so fucking in my head about it I couldn‘t ask, and then we left and went our separate ways. 
—----------------------------------------------------------------------------
You
“Look, I’d better get back to my table, my boyfriend’s waiting-”
“Boyfriend?” Jimmy cut you off. “I thought you and Carmy were dating?” 
“Yeah, when we were like 17-” You started but Carmen cut you off. 
“We never dated.”
There was an uncomfortable silence. Your smile faltered, then faded entirely and it was all Carmen’s fault. 
“Look, I’m sure my table is waiting on me to order, it was great to see you guys,” you smiled and left the room, walking back to your table, a sigh leaving your lips. 
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Carmen 
“You are such a fuckin’ asshole!” Richie shouted as Sugar and Jimmy sighed. “What the fuck are you talkin’ about ‘we never dated’? You’re still fuckin’ in love with her!” 
“Richie just fuck off ok! I don’t have to explain shit to you-” I started but I was cut off by Sugar. 
“That was such a shitty thing to say Bear! We haven’t seen that girl in fucking years and of course you had to fucking ruin it. We’ll probably never fucking see her again!” 
“I know that was shitty Sugar, I’mf fucking aware!” I started as I walked out of the office and into the kitchen. I wanted to make your food amazing. That was the only way you’d ever forgive me, right?
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You
You walked back to your table and answered any and all questions pertaining to your relationships with the Berzattos, leaving out that you had a crush on Carmen. You allowed yourself to peek into the kitchen window and you saw him furiously moving. He was mixing something? You couldn’t see. Adrian’s kissing your shoulder pulled you back to reality. Adrian was great. He knew how hard tonight was for you. He knew about what happened in your childhood. He knew about what happened with Carmen. Adrian’s friends, Emilia and John both got up to take a smoke break and he turned to you. 
“Are you alright?” He asked, squeezing your hand.
“Fine, it’s just… messy, I guess.”
“Well you’re doing great. John and Emilia love you,” he smiled and kissed your cheek. “I wouldn’t have picked this place if I knew, I just wanted to see you-”
“I know,” you smiled at him. “I wanted to see you too,” You pressed a soft kiss to his lips and he grinned. 
“You look so beautiful tonight,” he flirted. 
“So do you,” you simply said and he chuckled. 
“Such a flirt,” he joked and you laughed, a real laugh. He kissed you again, quick and sweet. “I love you.”
“I love you too,” you said matter-of-factly and his face lit up. You truly had no idea if you actually loved him. Your commitment issues were constantly getting in the way of your relationships, so you had to do something, telling him you love him, I admit, might’ve been a crazy thing to start with but, you were running out of options.
He kissed you again, less quickly but still polite enough to not be seen as improper. John and Emilia started walking back in, so you pulled away to see him with a boyish grin on his face. 
That felt… good? Like it was right?
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Carmen
I walked out into my own restaurant, nervous as I was when I was 17, asking you to the prom. All you have to do is explain the dishes. I thought to myself. I know my dishes. Richie walked behind me with the other two dishes in his hands, and I took a deep breath. There you were, radiant as ever, laughing along with what someone said. I would do fucking anything to just have your number so I could just text you sometimes. 
I walked up, standing beside you and your smile flattened, looking fake. 
“Hey Carmen,” you greeted. 
“And how do you know the owner?” John asked, excited about all of the attention your table was getting.
“We were-”
“We dated in highschool,”  I said before you could finish and John chuckled as your boyfriend put a protective arm around your shoulder. I explained all the dishes and placed them in front of each of your table. 
“Thanks Bear,” you mumbled and my heart practically stopped. 
“Well, thanks,” your boyfriend gritted out. I smirked. 
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