#and i made some writers so happy

[xx-thedarklord-xx]

I think I’m going to cry

#ao3 #ao3 writer #ao3 comments #no joke #I got teary eyed #it’s just so sweet #and it made my whole week #sometimes I feel like my end notes are a bit much #and I ramble #but I like taking y’all through my experience when writing #like my thoughts #or my original idea that might have changed #I love being able to share that #and I know some don’t read it #just keep scrolling #which is fine #and okay #no hard feelings #but to know that there are some that like my end notes #makes me happy

[good-beanswrites]

My english lyrics for Triage woo! (They're written out under the cut, I just wanted to share my lil chart lol)

Though I'm too indecisive to officially label this as my favorite song, it's had the strongest emotional impact on me by far. It holds a special place in my heart, I definitely wanted to write lyrics for it first! I'll leave all my rambling process commentary in the tags, but I was so happy with how it came out!!

All of those cards of promise thrown down carelessly,

This must be retribution for all I've taken endlessly.

If that were the case, it should have been fate for me to die.

That's the truth, given my crime, so why--?

No, I can't take it, to this cruel joke I'll submit. You

don't know, you can't know, but I'm ready to admit:

Killing for them, extracting for them, won't change the fact they're dead.

I need someone to tag me as RED.

It makes me sick (sick), it's too unpleasant. Sick (sick)

Is this punishment? What do you mean I'm INNOCENT?

I see, the world is cruel and leaves you on your own.

(I can't die) to atone. (I can't love) alone.

I can't be saved (saved), you've nothing to give. Saved (saved)

But what if I lived? Why else would you choose to forgive?

I see, there's lives to save so let's be sensible.

Right now, you need me, (I can be) indispensable.

Tilt to and fro, I know the scales should land on GUILTY for me.

Tilt fro and to, it's INNOCENT that they choose.

They cry (x4) out in pain, I can hear them. There's no one else, to guard their health,

My mission is offering help.

All of those cards of promise thrown down carelessly,

This must be retribution for all I've taken endlessly.

So if that's the case, then it must be fate to make amends,

Extract that fang before we meet the end.

It makes me sick (sick), it's too unpleasant. Sick (sick)

Is this punishment? What do you mean I'm INNOCENT?

I see, the world is cruel, but what I've realized is

(Now I want) to be INNOCENT. (Now I want) to live.

It makes me sick (sick), This wasn't my plan, hostages at my command.

Their future resting in my hands

I see, there's lives to save so let's be sensible.

Right now, please save me, (I will be) indispensable.

Maybe this was meant to be -- oh  -- or maybe neither of us can know

There's lives to save so let's be sensible.

Right now, please save me, (I will be) indispensable.

---

I mentioned earlier that I always get annoyed with myself when people post translyrics and I can't figure out the rhythm they were going for, so here's a recording of me singing, but I'm bad at it! It's just for fun! Like a rough draft for music! Because the only thing worse than people hearing my voice is people thinking I can't count syllables!

#milgram #shidou kirisaki #lyrics #im real happy with how they came out :)) #when i first got into milgram i started writing tear drop lyrics but got discouraged #(ill be revisiting them next but) it was so fun to work with this song! #i love the sound of it and had a great time creating my version #i wanted his repeated lines in the refrain to have a punch to them #and was SO satisfied giving the doctor 'sick' and 'saved' as his focus words #the mention of 'throw down' wasnt originally intended but it fit so well i just had to keep it asdfsd #i looked up an internet translation for 'Shinenai sentaku o ikenai ai o' because the official english line confused me #and it gave me 'i cant die. i cant go. i cant love.' and i loved that more than the official translation actually #really the only word that doesnt flow quite like id want is 'punishment' but the meaning/rhyme made me happy so i kept it haha #nothing can replace the sound satisfaction 'Yurayura tenbin yurusa naide hoshii noni/Yureteru yurushite hoshii to' gives me tho -_- #and i wanted a more open-mouth sound when he sings 'dattaka' the second time -- i absolutely love how he draws it out #but had to settle for what i could make work 🤷‍♀️ #we are spitting in the face of cringe culture and posting my voice!! #some writers are okay if their complete vision doesnt make it across to the audience but Not Me #i gotta show my whole vision and draft 😂 #oh and excuse his voicemail message LMAO #i love shidou with all my heart but i have to tease him about shoving his profession in our face every chance he gets #(did we ever get a translation for that btw?) #but yeah im always preaching to do arts and things youre bad at just because theyre fun so i figured id take my own advice #because it was a lot of fun to sing :3 #and i dont know how to word this in the fans-having-collaborative-fun way and not a pretentious way #but if any of the milgram pals who like singing want to cover it hmu :D

[ninjasmudge]

people really will say shit like 'the fic i found hasn't updated in a whole month so i think its been abandoned which is a shame, i wanted to read more' like where do you even get the nerve

#this definitely isnt abt my fic dw #this is me seeing other people start talking about fics in past tense if they havent updated in a little while #as if fic writers are your content creators that are writing for you and need to do it every day to keep the algorithm happy #ao3 doesnt have an algorithm and tiktok and other social media really really does rot your brain #like its a very specific level of anger that arises in me when i see people demanding shit for free constantly from random strangers #just because you liked something they made you think your entitled to tell thrm what to do? to demand more? #to tell them what to invest their time in when most of them have full jobs?? #theres not many things in life that get that deep anger from me but people like that really do #shark talks #l #for me its usually when i post a comic and some idiot is like 'part two?' in the replies immedietly its like. u didnt even reblog #or say you liked it. its a standalone comic what fuckin part 2 do you even want? #you dont even know youre just so used to demanding things like a child that you do it automatically

[bittersweetresilience]

something i haven't seen a lot of people talk about before is that commenting actually INCREASES my appreciation for a fic. i'm the kind of person who reads constantly and tag browses and is subscribed to a billion authors so i often find myself in a sort of consumption fugue state where i'm theoretically enjoying my time but really am just kind of scrolling transiently through walls of words. but commenting is taking a mental step back from that state to actually consider a fic and give myself space to feel things about it and appreciate what i love about it, picking up on small details i might have otherwise missed, sort of like a gratitude journal or mindfulness practice and we all know what the science says about that 💕

#i'm not interested in those posts that make out commenting to be some kind of moral requirement or necessary writer fuel or whatever because #in the end people should put out what they put out because they want to and work on having a healthy relationship #with whatever naturally comes out of that (this is a reminder to myself as well) #but i'm coming to realize commenting is a genuinely fun and rewarding practice for everyone involved #the reader first and foremost! it's like being back in book club #and bonus you might even get a really nice reply from the author hehe asukiess if you see this your replies made me very happy today 💘💘 #i would LOVE to hear your fic ideas or read more of your writing or send more love letters anytime!!! #ah these tags are so long. hit post #🌃

[timelessbibliophile]

if portwell had a possibility to get back together would you want that?

So this is a fascinating question because it depends on how they develop it. If they do the right steps, and take the right time to get them back together, I'd love that. If they were to do a cheap plot to get them back together, then I'd rather that they don't do it.

I've always thought that portwell was a couple worth respecting. If I didn't, I wouldn't have been so mad with the season 3 finale; I believe they deserve something better than what they got. So naturally, I'd want the same if they were to get back together.

We know EJ just tried to do what was best for the play, for the Disney+ show, for everyone involved, and especially for his friend. He tried to do everything right, and yes, he did fail in many aspects, and that led to a slippery slope of miscommunication and misunderstandings. Eventually, Gina and EJ broke up because he was (in Gina's eyes) neglecting her. However, I think most of us in the portwell community agree that it was a misunderstanding that could've been easily solved with a conversation on the pressure of directing a show, and taking care of a cast, while also trying to enjoy his last year at camp (and by extension, his last year being a kid). He neglected Gina a couple of times, but it was understandable given the amount of pressure he was under, so if portwell were to get back together, I would need Gina to acknowledge that. I'd love it if she admitted that she might've been projecting some of her insecurities onto him, which leads me to the next problem to be solved.

When Gina broke up with EJ, she said she "couldn't be a maybe anymore", but she was not a maybe. Sure, EJ might not have been there for her 24/7 (which we already established was not right), but that doesn't mean he doubted his feelings for her. She needed something stable, she explains that her whole life has been about change, but now needed something stable, which is completely understandable, but there wasn't much evidence for her to believe EJ couldn't be that. So far, what we had seen, and what Gina had seen, was EJ showing up for her every time, even when they were just friends. Instead of trying to talk to him on why this time he was failing in that area, she went straight to breaking up, accusing him of being unsure of their relationship. Why? My interpretation is that in some level she was projecting her own insecurity on their relationship. When they started dating, she's very clear about how nervous she is to be someone's girlfriend, how she wants to be the perfect girlfriend. She was putting this pressure on herself and the relationship to be perfect, and when it wasn't that, she started panicking. Along comes Ricky, who doesn't come with an insane amount of pressure. He's just... Ricky. Someone she has always been able to talk to, someone who was her first friend, someone who genuinely cared about her. Even though they agreed to start again, there was obviously still a lingering uncertain air of something that didn't get closure because she had moved on. While her relationship with EJ was going sideways because he was too busy, Ricky was right there, being present, making up for all the times that he wasn't. She started doubting her relationship with EJ, and when the climactic moment of their breakup came, she told him he thought she was a maybe, when it actually might've been the other way around. It becomes even clearer when she confesses to Ricky in the last scene and uses the same wording, even though Ricky doesn't know (like us) what it means. She says, "I don't have maybe feelings about you. You aren't a maybe, you're a yes." Unless that was the way SHE felt for EJ, the line is worded wrong. If the truth was that she felt like she was being neglected before, and now she isn't, she would have said "I don't feel like a maybe when I'm with you," or something along those lines. If they got back together in season 4, Gina would have to admit to EJ that she was insecure, and projected all of that onto him.

Part of the reason for their breakup was the pressure they both felt. EJ felt pressure from the outside, the world, his dad, his own expectations for himself, but not inside the relationship. Gina felt pressure coming from herself IN the relationship, if that makes sense. Gina's appeal to Ricky in season 3, like a mentioned, was partly because she didn't feel so much pressure with him. She didn't have to be "the girlfriend", she could just be herself. If Portwell were to get back together, I would love a friendship arc to be built again, based on a friendship without pressure. Season 2's development of them was great because of that. They didn't feel pressure from their relationship with each other, Gina was unsure of her future, but not her future with him, and EJ was the same. Their friendship would have to go back to that, and since now they know that that's what affected their relationship, be intentional to make it translate into a proper relationship.

However (and this is the last thing I want to talk about since this post is already long enough), for EJ and Gina to get back together, Gina and Ricky would have to break up. As much as I dislike Rina as a romantic couple, I still want their relationship to be respected since hundreds of people enjoy it, and also the characters themselves deserve to be respected. If they were to break up, I would like it to be because they realized they're better off as friends than lovers. Make it a them thing, and not get EJ involved until they're broken up, which is why getting portwell back together would only work until season 5. If they got together in season 4, after Rina JUST broke up, it would be disrespectful to the fans who love it and the ship itself. This is why portwell shippers were so mad with the ending of season 3. It was so rushed, so clearly fan service to keep the rina shippers happy, that it completely ruined portwell's chance to mourn their recently broken relationship (and the fans who also had to suffer through it). As a portwell shipper myself, I wouldn't want to wish that on anyone, not even rina shippers (even tho they've been mean to me before lol). Season 4 to build their relationship back up, and season 5 to get back together.

After all of this, my answer to your question anon, is no. I already went through everything that I think needs to be solved in order for it to be a clean make up, and knowing these writers, they won't do that. So if they won't do it, I won't like it.

Basing off of the way they've handled the other relationships on the show, if they wanted portwell back together it would probably go like: Ricky and Gina have a couple great episodes! They're laughing, they're kissing, they're loving each other... but, oh, no, Ricky screws up, and guess who's there? EJ. He apologizes for being a jerk to Gina in season 3, says that he really cares about her and only wants to be her friend. Gina accepts his apology, and tells him everything that has been going on with Ricky. They start getting closer and closer, and Gina and Ricky just keep going down. They eventually have this big, emotional, dramatic moment in which they break up and agree they just aren't meant to be. Gina has like a week to mourn until she realizes that her true love was EJ all along. Ricky also gets a new love interest, probably.

#however this is probably not gonna happen #bc the writers for some reason just hate ej so much #it would be a crime if they made him happy #portwell #hsmtmts #ask kitty #anti rina #i don't think i'm saying bad things about rina #but just in case anyone decides i said something offensive lol

[wayfinderships]

Man...I do not talk enough about my O.ne P.iece s/i...they really are so cool-

#pan rambles #They're my most developed s/i and I love and cherish them so deeply #as well as their complicated relationship with S.anji #it all just fits so nicely to me and I like them very much <3 #I should really talk more about my s/is but I don't really know where to begin with them sometimes-afksbfjsn #I'm not writer so I can't say they're the best written but they're made with a lot of love and care! #I'm always happy to answer questions about my silly little s/is <3 #Even about some I'm still developing like F.inal F.antasy 8 s/i or M.ass E.ffect s/i! #although I may not have an answer for everything with those since I'm still developing them #but yeah! gksbfjsjf s/is! #they're just as important as the f/o to me! #if I have an f/o and/or a crush then I certainly have an s/i made or in the process of being made <3

[andthebeanstalk]

To give credit to the last of us for its queer rep, it’s not just queer characters who have tragic/bittersweet endings. Literally everyone (siblings, parent and child, heterosexual) queer or not, has tragic endings. The older queer couple gets the best one out of all of them.

I guess? I mean, it is certainly much better than if they were the only characters to die in the storyline. But people were on tumblr talking about how theirs was a happy queer story. And I think it is the misleading discussion around these characters that bothers me even more than the writing. Like if I had watched that episode instead of looking up the plot summary, I would have had a meltdown at the end when they both died because I truly had gotten the impression that it was going to be a happy story.

But now that I've mentioned the writing:

It's nice that they live till their 70s. It's nice that they get 20 beautiful years together. And it's a bit fucked that the writers felt the need to end those 20 long years on-screen with a terminal illness and suicide in the same episode they are introduced. It would have been incredibly easy to just say that those men get to live on past the end of the episode. There are a million reasons those men could have continued living in the story.

But that's the thing about a show like this. I think there is a distinct possibility that this show is actually incapable of writing a satisfying happy ending.

Craig Maizin, the show's writer, gained acclaim recently with Chernobyl, proving that he is apparently excellent at writing a long, horrifying tragedy in which character struggle only to find there is no way out.

(His other main credits are The Hangover sequels and the Scary Movie sequels, most of which I haven't personally seen, so make of that what you will.)

But more than the writer's background, the show itself troubles me. It has this repeated mantra in it that goes, "when you're lost in the darkness, look for the light." Which is a cool phrase.

But I have reason to suspect that this writer genuinely doesn't know how to write the light. I have no reason to believe he does. I hope I am wrong.

But when you write episode after episode after episode that is an endless inescapable slog of tragedy and desperation - and then advertise it to me, a sick queer person actually living through a pandemic and trying to escape disease and poverty - well.

I think a better writer would include moments of light and hope beyond just trauma bonding. Moments that don't end in death.

When my wife writes about characters in awful situations, there are still these moments of genuine loveliness and fun and joy between the characters; these moments remind the reader what is worth actually fighting for, living for. Imagine! Entire chapters in a post-apocalyptic novel in which characters don't undergo a "hacking someone to death with a cleaver" level of trauma!

But the fact that Bill and Frank still had to die even after an earnest attempt to tell a beautiful love story....

I fear that the light the story ends with - if there is any - will be as dim and desaturated as the show itself. And personally, I am at a point in my life where I don't care to see a story like that.

It's fine if you do like it. It doesn't matter to me if you find beauty in a tragic queer love story. There are places for that in this world. But it is tragic. I am sure of that. And I wish I hadn't been seeing posts saying otherwise, ya know?

And I hope I am wrong about the writer. But I see cracks in the premise. Like in Stranger Things. There was always a promise of light that kept me watching, but it never seemed to come. Instead, the misery and trauma continued to stack and compound for the lead characters, like in TLOU. But... does the writer know how to make that worth it, for us, for the audience - for me? I don't think he does.

I think it very possible that the light isn't really coming for Ellie and Joel in a way that provides catharsis because I have noticed that on shows with no intermittent joy and hope, this is too often the case.

But I do hope I'm wrong. Because if I am right, then a lot of mentally ill fans will leave the experience more depressed than if they hadn't watched it at all.

But for my own part, I'll just continue to skim through the show for monster design ideas. And also I'll say that everyone should watch Infinity Train - ESPECIALLY season 2 of Infinity Train, if they'd like to see a story in which people actually DO find a light that makes the whole journey feel worth it.

#original #tlou #the last of us #bill and frank #writing #writing analysis #again i don't care if you like the show or not. you can like the show. it is well made. but that is NOT a happy queer ending. #it is not a happy story to me. i know it isn't AS BAD as it could've been but also.... i don't care #my money is on 'joel dies and ellie is so traumatized by the experience that she is basically non functional' #look for the fucking light i guess. wheeeeeeee #infinity train #mt infinity train #lake infinity train #seeing a story in which a character escapes a seemingly inescapable situation GENUINELY made me feel like there was hope for me #and i have personally found that the opposite has an opposite effect #tragedies have a purpose. but i fear sometimes the tragedy in some shows is just there bc the writer feels there must be 4 tragedies per ep #but like. trauma in a story - added just for the sake of extra trauma - it is a red flag for where this story is going #bly manor #FUCKING BLY MANOR MY ARCH FOE #i also see no need for a show of endless tragedy to be this long. like. they are experiencing the SAME trauma repeatedly. what does it add? #ellie loses ANOTHER friend horribly! like. okay. we've... already seen that? why is this one worthy of screen time other than you CAN?

[yuriyuruandyuraart]

HAPPY BIRTHDAY @jann-the-bean!!!!!

you know i had to draw this lil precious baby again because my GOSH-!!! too adorable<333 (i believe she is capable of murder with how full of rage she is tho- gremlin behavior<;3333)

there's only so many ways i can say how much i adore your art and writings before i become a broken record because SERIOUSLY!!!! you are my biggest inspiration when it comes to writing and i swear if i hear you saying ANYTHING otherwise i'm breaking into your house no matter how far away you are cause i'm not tolerating such lies!!!! you are an AMAZING bean and i would hug you to death if i could >:'Dc <333

mocha belongs to jann

mobster au is both by @help-im-a-gay-fish and jann

#art #my art #gift #mobster au #mocha #mob!mocha #human!mocha #because seriously how can a human be so HUGGABLE #i wanna be her friend but she would be too cool for that</3 #hhh xD okay okay but seriously if i catch you having a bad day- on your BDAY of all days!!- me and your brain's gonna have some problems- #my vocabulary is poor man idk how to tell you you're like. the most fantastic kind and supportive talented writer AND artist ever #without repeating myself!! you've heard all of these before but they're still TRUE!!! you're just!!! so COOL!!! #still remember the days before my blog and if i could describe what it felt like to be followed back by you it would be. insane #IT WAS CRAZY i was literally shaking!!! you absolute MASTERPIECE maker like name me ONE fic you made that you don't like- #and i'll cite all the things that make it a literal banger like don't try me!!!! i WILL bury you with love you menace to society!!! #i have so many fond memories of your past writings tho i think i'm just gonna re-read them once i finish my studying :') #just came back from school and i rushed to my computer to post this hhh >:'D please don't forget how much you mean to all of us!!! #amazing. you are AWESOME AND GREAT like always!!!! #happy bday mÖther- queen of angst and sweet precious boys >:'Dc <3333

[lienwyn]

WIP Tag

Rules: post the names of all the files in your WIP folder regardless of how non-descriptive or ridiculous.  Let people send you an ask with the title that most intrigues them and then post a little snippet of it or tell them something about it! And then tag as many people as you have wips.

So @clawbehavior tagged me for art (thank you! 💜), which has definitely never happened before, so sure! Here's a list of my current drawing WIPs. Limited to the ones I've either started or hope to start on within the near future.

Love

Art Nouveau Mitia

The Judges

Beach Hunt

Come Back

Dance

Silent Heart - Ji-Hun

Mutants

Starlight

Suspenders and Neck Kinks

Haze Redraw

Who Holds the Devil - Chapter 24

Out of those, five are fanarts and the other five are with my or my friends' OCs. Have fun guessing which is which xD

I tag (though obviously not limited to art): @miss-ingno, @a-very-fond-farewell, @sjazna, @shi-toyu, and whoever else wants to do it!

#Tags #WIPs #I say have fun guessing #But at least three fanarts are pretty easy if you know anything about the fandoms I write and draw for xD #Also #Not going to lie #Sometimes I'm a little bummed by how my writing overshadows my art x'D #Because in my mind I'm an artist first and writer second #But to most people it seems like it's the opposite #So thank you for highlighting my art #That actually made me really happy #That's not to say that I dislike my writing by the way #It's just nice with some variety

[semercury]

i miss things.

#stuff sarah says #i think i mostly miss the tight knit community with close friends #writing is a very lonely hobby and it was nice having a hype crew #i went back to look at memes i made for old longfics. i miss doing that. #i still share wips with some people and love adore and appreciate the feedback i get #but idk. the energy was different back then. but i think my energy in general is different now #everyone including myself is out here fighting for their lives #no time to make and laugh at memes about niche fics #idk. i feel like this makes me sound ungrateful. i'm not #i just miss the tiny writer club i had with a certain group of friends #feels bad bc i'm basically the one who set it on fire on account of me being insane #idk. i'm tired. i feel gross. i cried in my car bc my food was missing half the order or at least what i was used to #so if that tells you what kind of mental state i'm in rn... #and on top of it i'm trying to write a heavy scene #like hi you almost died but can we talk about the drunk phone calls? please stop telling me how much you want to die #i love you and i don't want you to die. i already had someone die in my arms a few years ago i can't handle that again thanks #cool. love you. no smooches yet. let's get our daughter and get the fuck out of here i'm tired #edit: and another thing. i miss just interacting with fics in general. mine and others #but alas i'm terrified #if i go on ao3 and am happy something is Going To Get Me #there's fucking ooze there and i'm tired of it! i want to use my fic site again!!!!!!! #i miss it!!!!!! i miss getting so hyped over other people's writing and feeling like i can say that!!!!!!!!! #i don't feel like i'm allowed to anymore and it sucks!!!!!!!!! #i don't want to read and not be hype. but just going on ao3 takes so much energy and effort and reading is so so hard these days #that i know i won't have enough energy for a proper comment so like. why should i enjoy what someone made if i can't even share that #joy with them? #and i know that's so so so stupid bc i think very few people would ever expect that of others? #like i know at least for me i'd rather have someone read and not interact than not read at all #not that it looks like i think like that bc i haven't replied to anyone in forever #but that's bc i go to and then i get the shakes bc i'm nuts and there's ooze!!!!! i'm tired of the ooze!

[twistedappletree]

Gonna post another zhuiling fic soon in-between the manor fic just because I tried to get some writing done on the manor fic while I was in burnout mode and ended up writing a bunch of useless crap LOL

needed to take a breather and work on another idea so I could recharge enough to go back and rewrite the parts I sabotaged 🫠

#writer life is so fun ayyyyyy lmaooo #BUT BUT BUT #this inbetween fic is almost 4k long so it should be a good intermission #I basically wrote that bookshop AU I was screaming about earlier but I made it work in the canon universe/ancient setting #and added some extra bits #there’s also highly implied SANGCHENG ✨👀✨ hehehehhehe love them #also Jingyi being…… well #jingyi lmaoooo #my favorite honestly #eeeeeee I’m just happy I’m gonna have a new fic to post at least bc I’ve been quiet on AO3 #I haven’t died I swear I’m just working every day of my life until further notice #bc nobody wants to take this sweet ass dog walking/shopping gig apparently 😭😭😭 #ANYWAY #I’m just ranting now so I’m gonna shut up and go write lmaooo byeeeee #apple babble 🍎 #fic musings

[angorwhosebabyisthis]

> posts a fic i'm proud of about dark subject matter to do with five and his abuse, which came from a very personal place, on AO3

> gets a comment

> it is, Course, a hate comment from an anti, demanding on anon to know why i would 'spend my value as a writer who's read Legacies' to write it

> roasts their ass like a thanksgiving turkey and immediately goes to write more of the thing

#LL tag #antis cw #the entitlement is unreal and it Will get you made fun of sorry #like for one thing first and foremost my art is for me; unless i am specifically writing something as a gift for someone else #which i do when i do it because it brings me joy #but also i do find happiness; joy; and fulfillment in posting art that i made for myself; and it being meaningful to other people #i've got LL fics that are ten years old that people still mention having loved now and then; and that i still get kudos on #and it is so humbling in the best way; i cannot express how much my opinion on it is not 'lol go fuck yourselves i don't care' #.......BUT. your 'value' as a writer/artist/etc in fandom is not something you '''spend''' #you are a *person* who shared your time and effort and a little part of your soul #that nourishes people it resonates with; until they have enough left over to maybe share some of theirs right back #a fandom that is good for you and treating you decently will leave you with more of yourself to share; not less #the value you are bringing to a fandom is *you* #what your value to the fandom is *not* is #'someone who's read the thing i like; puts words on paper; and is therefore categorically capable of making content for me to consume' #'and ONLY content for ME to consume' #'if you write anything i don't want to read you are personally taking food out of the mouths of me and my starving children' #writers and artists in fandom are not ATMs for the fandom to leave empty #and if anyone tries to treat you like one they're an entitled weirdo who's actively dehumanizing you & i advise you to drop their ass & run #anyway i just have a lot of thoughts about the subject and i am grateful to people in fandom who aren't Like This #whereas anon can use the block button or cry themself to sleep at night every time i post another fic about five being an abuse survivor #the salt files #abuse mention cw #grooming mention cw

[astro-b-o-y-d]

I think transmascs will truly have rights the day this website stops hailing Ozma as a trans woman icon and recognizes him for what he really was; a boy forced into detransitioning back into a girl because ‘it wasn’t honest for him to take the throne as a boy’ or whatever that bullshit was in the writing.

#Hayley Speaks #I saw that post on mobile a few days back and it made me mad #Yes he was changed into a boy at birth and raised as one but he was HAPPY with being one #He expressed UNHAPPINESS with being transformed back into a girl #And the one time he was like 'well if I don't like it; can I change back'; Glinda said 'No' #Listen I know there were a ton of issues within the stories themselves and with the writer himself #And I'd be a hypocrite to say 'Oh you can't just reinterpret the story how you want to make the characters trans' #(I do that with Chihiro so I get it) #But also maybe we should stop hailing characters who express discomfort with being seen as feminine as trans women icons #Especially if they express happiness with being male but are unfortunately not allowed to express themselves as male- #-due to certain circumstances in the writing/media #Sometimes.......people who don't want to be seen as girls and are uncomfortable with being seen as girls....aren't girls #Also there was some racist undertones about Tip having darker skin but then having lighter skin when he became Ozma #But that's another topic #I will acknowledge it though because what the fuck

[alchemiclee]

I didn't like blade at first for some reason. too edgy and emo and seemed generic like a sasuke (I never liked sasuke lmao) when I learned about yingxing, I really liked him but still didn't like blade. now I like both for some reason even if yinxing is a dumbass who did this to himself. but blade grew on me somwhow, and someone really needs to gently hold him or something. that poor man. he's so broken. give him a break 😭

#why do i often end up like the sad tragic characters #sometimes even ones that do evil shit because i feel bad for them or something lmao #words #hsr #if they really wanna make us sad they can end game give him a purpose and reason to live but then make him die permanently 😈 #because its what he askd for all this time ans its granted to him and he realizes in the end he made a mistake and isnt ready yet #(i doubt theyll do that but it would amuse me to see people's reactions fbfdhjsj) #i doubt blade will have a happy ending and it would be weird if they dont end him at the end #also dan heng needs a hug. hes also a mess and wont leave his room right now fhdjjdjjsjs #i hope he can open up to his friends more at some point and they become closer and rely on each other more????? #he has hope of moving on with them. but what if he also ends up tragically ending fhfdhjddj blade still wont let him go #tbh ive kinda lost faith in the writers writing a good story. they rush things and everything is disconnected and many holes #so idk if it'll end up being a good story at this point 😅 maybe my expectations are too high for this type of game idk #but they did show good potential and kinda threw it away imo fhbfdjjdjdkd #what am i rambling about

[hardly-an-escape]

gonna scream about something in the tags real quick

#I woke up this morning and saw that softest-punk had recommended a fic of mine in an ask they answered #like….. recommended a fic of MINE in the same post where they recced moorishflower and vergil #WHAT THE FUUUUUUCK #and to be honest I went on to have a pretty crappy day (fighting a sinus infection - husband dropped an entire bottle of soy sauce which #shattered on the kitchen floor - just feeling generally tired and overwhelmed after an intensely busy week) #but the fact that one of the writers I most admire in this fandom not only read one of my works #but liked it enough to tell other people to read it??? made me so happy that I genuinely teared up a little bit #and it was just a great reminder how impactful little things like fic recs and comments and such can be #anyway thank you Cecil you made my day <3 #and this was really lovely motivation to get some more writing done

[sapphic-woes]

When. When u get excited by a comment but see it's literally just asking for more.

#usually i just dont respond to those comments lmao #usually when i see those comments i have to tell myself not to abandon the fic out of pettiness tbh #yea when i say they rlly don't do what yall think they do...they RLLY don't #ur kinda. at least for me. giving me reasons to drop it lol #so uhhh maybe just say what u like or keyboard smash and move on? #my fav comments are just knowing the fic made u happy in some way. or a fave part #or just emotions expressed through big ass screaming tbh #i think for most writers thats what brightens theur day #straight up saying MORE OMG MORE!!! #will make me have the most strained smile. like i am forcing myself not to be annoyed tbh #asking me directly? lol #lol.