#and i literally almost lost a friendship too bc a friend of mine fell for that same girl and i tried to warn her that she wasn't looking for

[aajjks]

DEFINITELY getting deja vu lol 😂😂

BC!JK

you can’t believe your eyes, THE jeon jungkook, leader of the bangtan bully club, is on his knees begging for your forgiveness. it almost feels like a dream and sounds like one if you were to say it out loud but no. it’s real, he’s really on his knees begging for you to forgive him but unfortunately, this isn’t something a sorry will fix.

you roll your eyes and move around jungkook to get your next class. you’ve already told jungkook how you felt: you hate him, remember? he wasn’t sorry when he did those God-awful things to you with his friends and you’re sure the moment you forgive him he’ll do it all over again. you fell for it once but you’re not falling for it again and you learned your lesson: never trust a wolf in sheep’s clothing.

“you know she’s never going to like you right?” yoongi says as he helps jungkook off of the floor “and i think she made it pretty clear that she hates you and wants you to leave her alone” yoongi adds which only pisses jungkook off more but he just wishes he’d understand that his chance to ever be with you is long gone and that he’s better off with yerin, someone who actually likes him.

“you should learn how to take a hint” someone says to jungkook.

“i feel really bad for her. i heard the bully club poured milk on her two weeks ago”

“didn’t one of them shove her on the floor?”

“like, she walked past him like he wasn’t there! i mean, i don’t blame her. he treated her like shit”

“i thought they were dating?”

“he’s a horrible boyfriend if they were dating”

the rumors brew back up but this time, everyone seems to be on your side. everyone is sympathetic about how jungkook and his friends treated you those weeks prior to now.

*RIIIIIIING*

goes the bell as everyone scurries to their classes and while yoongi wishes he could comfort his friend, he’s more-so annoyed with jungkook’s obsession with you than empathetic. despite how horribly he treated you, jungkook still persists on trying to be with you even though you made it loud and clear that there was no way you’d give him another chance.

relationship? out the window.

friendship? no chance.

he ruined it all and as yoongi watches jungkook wallow in his regrets, he tells him one last thing before heading on his way.

“you aren’t the leader of the bully club anymore. you being a simp for y/n doesn’t look good on us so namjoon is the leader now. sorry man”

Jungkook glares at the older man, “fuck you and that club! I do not want to be a part of it anymore- SO COUNT ME OUT” and that is true because… the club has literally ruined everything for him, and he was so dumb to become a part of it in the first place..

Or maybe he was just dumb enough to catch feelings for you. Even begging on his knees and,.. publicly humiliating himself, didn’t really work- Jungkook groans before rolling his eyes at yoongi, he doesn’t care if they don’t want him to be the leader anymore but he does care about one thing.

“listen to me carefully.. if you guys hurt her or bully her- I’m gonna fuck you up.” Jungkook glares at Yoongi, “ I might’ve lost my chances with her, but I can protect her- from people like me.” He confesses.

Maybe it will be better for him to stay away from you for now… maybe he can work his way up to your heart one day if he decides to change himself for the better. “If I see you guys hurting her or even bothering her I will not hesitate to punch you in the face.” He points his finger at Yoongi.

Maybe this is karma for his bad deeds, he has to take the punishment, “yn will be mine, one day, hyung. You’ll see. I’ll change for her.”

And he is changing.

He will just have to give you some time. And show you that he can be a good man, worthy of your love. “She will love me too.”

You have to.

#ask: bc!jk #damn she’s firm on her ground- but maybe just a teeny tiny chance?

[irisesand]

for the last fifteen minutes of friendships day, i just want to talk about a few moments with my friends. these moments truly remind me of just how beautiful friendships are supposed to be.

1. recently, I've been trying to relearn my state's language and I was met in a situation where I had to use my limited knowledge of the language to try communicating with someone. when I got home, the first thing I did was send one of my friends who knows the language a long voice mail speaking IN the language but it was completely battered and bruised. and all she did was tell me how shocked she was about how 'good' I spoke and that's all the validation I needed, that's all the encouragement I needed. i now send that friend voicemails speaking in the language and I don't feel shame about how bad I speak.

2. yesterday, I sent my best friend a big voicemail about some emotional turmoil I was feeling. even though she told me that she's bad at providing people with comfort when they rant to her, she sat through the whole voicemail and tried comforting me. she kept being on my side while I let it all out when it was almost midnight and she had college the next day. she told me she had to go to bed, but would respond to me instantly. and the next day she sent me many words of encouragement before i even woke up.

3. I reconnected with one of my old friends from three years ago, and we instantly fell back into that pattern of talking. recently, I was taking a break from social media (you see i do this often, because I want some sanity in my brain in tact). and when I came back, the first thing I tweeted was "hey, do you have whatsapp?" because I wanted to talk to her more often but didn't want to be on social media much. and not even a second later, she sends me a dm with her number, and asks me if I'm okay and reassures me that things will be fine and that she's here for me.

4. a few months ago, I had been feeling an extreme amount of loneliness. I would often text this one friend of mine that i lost contact with and that once steady flow that ignited our friendship had seemingly disappeared. and it truly broke my heart, and I didn't want to let her know bc I didn't want to concern her. but one day, the sadness was too much to take and I was feeling this overwhelming grief over all the friendships that I lost over the years, and I just texted her a few messages about it. I didn't expect anything at all. but the next time I logged in I saw she sent me a few voicemail and in those she gently explained to me that it's okay and that sometimes friendships can't be the same, but it's no one's fault, and that people just tend to get busy. I will probably never forget that bc I cannot tell you how much I needed that.

5. I have these three friends that are my absolute constant for about three years. my ride or die, my pillars, they constitute so much of my life and my love. no matter how difficult life gets, I can always turn to them. I will always be there for them as they are for me. they mean more to me than the entire world. the gentleness of our friendship.

6. my other friend has had her exams for a whole month now, and I have been absolutely broken bc i missed her sm but i didn't want to disturb her. or give her anything else to worry about. so I would leave a message every now and then asking her to take care and if her exams are over yet. and yesterday, her exams were finally done. and as i was thinking of texting her, she sends me a message in all caps "hi bestie, I'm here" I love her so much.

7. just a few days ago, i was telling my friend recently about something stupid like how I asked my other friend who's studying medical to become a dentist bc of the absolute nightmarish fear of the dentist. and my med student friend literally said that she can't now but never said no. and i told my friend, who's also afraid of the dentist, this and she agreed to this insanity.

8. recently I became friends with the most beautiful and kind souls online. she's from my country, and from the first day I texted her, we never ran out of things to talk about (knock on wood). but I think she's the coolest person ever and I LOVE talking to her because she's able to say the most beautiful and kind things to me. just today, I was responding to her messages from days ago. and she told me that she would love if I had been in her college or atleast find someone like me in her college. she also asked for when my birthday is bc there are too many birthdays in august and she wanted to note mine down in her dairy.

#rooney ☆ #the human condition #essay rants #friendships #i love my friends #female friendships are beautiful #actually this took more than fifteen minutes #but doesnt matter #im so grateful #truly

[jawnjendes]

bonus: why is their luck in a deeply sad moment? | shawn mendes

some type of au idk man, shawn x goth ex gf

WARNING: there is talk of death and suicide in this chapter. read at your own risk.

AN: i cant squeeze this into the next big fic nor can i fit it into shawn meets bc everyone hated it so its a bonus in the gg story lmao also im starying the Next Big Fic in a few days :)

masterlist | annalise’s playlist

2026.

"Sometimes I think about the what ifs,"  Ann said, “but I like where I am. I like what I’ve made for myself.”

Shawn had to invite her over to his house a second time, because the first time left him with many questions unanswered. He couldn’t be mad at what she said, though. He was in the same boat; he liked the life he made. You know, without the crushing loss and run in with the supernatural.

“Well, I’m happy for you,” he told her, and he really meant it. “I’m glad we were able to successfully do our own things straight after breaking up.”

“Nothing like filling the void in your heart with work!” Ann replied with a giggle. She moved a strand of hair behind her ear, and that’s when Shawn noticed something.

He took her hand and noticed a tattoo on the side of her middle finger: The Triforce.

“You got inked?” he asked, impressed.

“Oh, that’s nothing,” she replied, grabbing her sleeve to roll it up.

There was a sword on her inner arm. It was varying in shades of blue, and it also had the Triforce on it. Shawn recognized it as the Master Sword from the Legend of Zelda games.

“All this is is proof that I’m a nerd,” Ann said as she rolled her sleeve back down. “I notice you have some more ink also… and that you still wear shirts half buttoned.” She pointed to his chest.

Her finger poked the exposed skin. It shouldn’t have been as tingly as it was. Shawn smiled and placed his hand over his chest.

“More than just that,” he told her. “But I can’t show you all of them.”

Maybe it was a little risky to say that. Shawn would have taken it back if Ann’s cheeks hadn’t gone a shade of pink.

“I could say the same thing…”

Shawn quickly came to learn just how many tattoos Ann had gotten over the years. A snake and tombstones on her other arm. Feather on her collarbone, roses on her shoulder. A quote reading, “...but I’m not anymore” with stars around it on her ribcage. Something on her wrist that Shawn didn’t catch because he was busy pressing his lips to her hips and taking off her pants, where he found another tattoo. “Lucky you.” He certainly felt it.

Everything about their time together was so familiar, so easy and almost home-like. Ann’s skin touching his. Her lips perfectly molding over his. The quiet, needy gasps they both released into the bedroom. It was like going back in time, and they were in Shawn’s Toronto apartment instead of his multimillion dollar condo in LA. It was soft and slow, despite Shawn pinning Ann’s arms above her head. He didn’t outgrow that particular move, and she still seemed to like it.

Shawn had never been happier to have been on a break more than now. Most one night stands in the past began and ended very quickly, because he was on tour or in between interviews or on a break for one day. This was one person that he didn’t want to leave behind. They lied down, sweaty and dazed, facing each other. It was silent, but not awkward. Everything had a nice haze around it.

That was also when Shawn finally made out what the tattoo on Ann’s wrist was. He picked his head up in confusion.

“Is… are those torches?” he asked. “Upside down? Just like mine… and are those my initials?”

It was simple line art, less intricate than his own. Torches in an X, with “SM” right below them. Shawn has been floored many times, and this was no exception.

Ann picked her head up as well. “It’s not what it looks like.”

Shawn looked down at his chest, his torches were exactly the same, sans the initials. He wanted to give Ann the benefit of the doubt, that this wasn’t some creepy fangirl thing. Some of his one night stands ended up like that, and it wasn’t exactly easy to forget.

“It’s for a friend of mine,” Ann explained, sitting up and covering her front with the blanket. She took note of the look on Shawn’s face. “Keeping someone’s light on beyond death, remember? I assume yours is for someone too.”

They were both sitting up now, and Shawn relaxed. However, he only relaxed a little bit because now it was time to get deep.

“Mine’s for Brian. He died last year.”

Ann’s face fell. “No. Brian, your best friend? Brian, the one who constantly took the piss outta me?”

He nodded. “He was… there was an accident. Flight of stairs. Instantly killed.” It was all lies, but no human would understand.

A hand went over his, squeezing. “I’m so sorry. He just, he just fell down some stairs?”

“A lot of stairs. I don’t know I guess he was running or something. There was no way to save him. People in the house heard the crash, but by the time they found him - when I found him - it was too late.” He had told this version many times, enough times to where he could almost believe it himself.

“Fuck, man. That’s… that’s fucking terrible,” Ann said sympathetically. “But I seriously can’t believe you just told me that.”

“Why?”

“Because now I have to tell you that mine is for Stella. Those are her initials.”

Stella Martinez. Now Shawn felt a little stupid… but surprised, and he was met with a sinking feeling in his stomach. He couldn’t believe it for a second, but it fully processed in his head, and his heart began to break.

“Stella from college? Stella, who was your literal opposite and also your best friend?”

Ann solemnly nodded. Then she looked down. “She… she killed herself.”

Shawn was stunned into silence, the tightness in his chest only intensifying. The entire time he knew Stella, she was always so positive and bubbly. She was the opposite of suicidal. That’s why it was such a shock… and so sad. Oh god, who was going to tell Camila?

“When did Brian go to the other side?” Ann asked after a moment.

“A year ago last month,” Shawn replied. “And Stella?”

Ann raised an eyebrow. “Two years ago last month...”

It was a strange coincidence, but still upsetting. Both Shawn and Ann lost their best friends at the same time of the year. The urge to spill everything was thick in the air. Still, neither of them said anything for a while.

Instead, Ann reached down to the floor to pick up her clothes. Shawn’s eyes were stuck on her and that was when he spotted another word on her back. Nightmare. Small font, right shoulder blade, surrounded by a cluster of skulls. Then, he realized what she was doing.

“Are you leaving?”

She looked up, bra in hand. She was quiet as she put it back on.

“No. No, I’m not going anywhere.”

And she crawled back into bed. She made the point to keep a distance from Shawn, who was still naked. He was on his side, looking at the woman before him. Only Ann could have sex with him and bring up the subject of death. That brought a new point to mind.

“How do you enjoy death?” he asked. “I think I’ve asked you this before, but after losing someone and attending their funeral, I’m having a hard time understanding your perspective.”

Ann took a deep breath, looking up at the ceiling. “I don’t enjoy the act of dying. People die every day in horrible ways. People mourn and fall into depression because of death. That’s not something to enjoy.”

“So what’s your deal with it?”

“I’m just embracing the face that it’s inevitable. I do that for myself. I will die eventually, or tomorrow-”

Shawn made a face; he didn’t like that thought.

“It doesn’t make it any easier when someone I know goes,” Ann continued. “You’d think with all the research I’ve done it would be. The ones we love leave this mortal plane, and all they leave is their absence. And that alone is a lot to process.”

“What’s the hardest part?”

“The what if’s.”

Shawn asked because he really wanted to know more about what happened to Stella. He had to know the things that led up to the tragedy, mostly because he knew Camila would ask for details, even if they were hard to hear.

He figured he should spill his side first.

“The last thing I said to Brian was to get the hell out of my room,” he began. “We were fighting, fighting over something so fucking stupid, and I was so pissed at him. That was our last interaction. He fell down the stairs because he was trying to find me in this big huge mansion…”

Ann sat up a little bit, hand over her chest. “Here?”

“Oh no, not here. I was staying at a friend’s house in London for a work thing. Place was huge, easy to get lost in,” Shawn clarified. “Brian, Andrew, all of them were leaving back to Toronto and I didn’t want to go just yet. Part of it was because I was still pissed. Maybe if I had run into him first before he fell… If I hadn’t kicked him out of my room a few nights prior… If I was less of an asshole…”

“Maybe you would have slipped on the stairs,” Ann told him. “Maybe you guys would have had an even bigger argument later that would have ended your friendship. There’s no way to tell, and sometimes that’s what sucks the most.”

Huh. Most people tell him not to dwell on it. No wonder Ann was a shrink now.

“Losing someone is one of the hardest things we, as humans, have to face,” she said. “It’s not easy in the slightest. Besides, the grieving period takes about three to five years, so you - we - are still in the beginning stages of it. Thinking about the what ifs, what you want to change, what you wish you could say to Brian - all of that is normal.”

The two of them let those words settle for a moment. Shawn’s eyes were a little misty, and redirecting the topic was probably not going to help. But he laid his stuff out on the table.

“What about you?” he asked.

“Me?”

“Your what ifs?”

Ann paused, looking around the room. “What if I had put my Master’s to use and noticed the goddamn signs?”

Shawn watched her, hoping she would at least return the eye contact.

“I’m an expert in this shit,” she said. “I have the years of school, the degrees, and the licenses for detecting things like this. I only figured it out the moment her dad called me.”

“How do you detect when someone is suicidal?”

“In her case, she was elated. When someone makes that decision, they reach a state of euphoria because they know their pain is about to end.”

“But Stella was always-”

“Believe me, I know. I hadn’t talked to her since graduating in Toronto, so I thought she hadn’t changed at all. But I would see on her social media, she just moved back to her parents’ house in Florida, and she hinted that she wasn’t happy about it.”

As if Shawn couldn’t take another blow. Come to think of it, he never heard much about Stella’s home life. He didn’t even think that it could be a negative place for her.

“I was in Jacksonville for work,” Ann continued, “so I hit her up, and we met up for lunch. We talked for about an hour, and she said that I was always a good friend and college wife and that she’ll always love me. And my stone hearted ass just said ‘cool, you don’t suck’ and that was that. A month later, she’s as blue as the pills she took.”

“Ooo…” Shawn sighed, cringing at that mental image. Sweet, warm hearted Stella cold and lifeless. Call it morbid, awful thinking, but Shawn wished Brian looked like that in death instead of the bloody mess he turned out to be.

“Yeah. And her parents had her embalmed and put in an airtight casket, but that’s a whole other rant.” Ann waved it off and lied back down.

Shawn didn’t know what else to do except lie down as well. While sharing the stories of how their friends died, he couldn’t help but feel just a little bit closer to Ann. The first time they met, it took fighting tooth and nail to get her to open up. Now, Shawn felt okay silently reached for her hand, and tenderly holding it in his.

Both of them winded up at the same awards show. Both lost their best friends. Both got the same type of tattoo to honor them. Neither of them anticipated meeting again. This couldn’t be a coincidence.

_______

goth gf taglist: @normalcyisoverrated-beyou @ilsolee @mendesromano @kitykatnumber @strangerliaa @iloveshawnieboi @someoneunimportantxx @goldenmndes @calyumthomas @shawnsunflower @shawnvvmendes @parkeraul @havethetimeeofyourlifee @chillingbythesea @wronglanemendes @softmendesss @peruvian-bae @theprivatewritings

#shawn mendes #shawn mendes fanfic #shawn mendes imagine #shawn mendes blurb #shawn mendes smut #shawn x oc #shawn x goth gf #if yall r pissedt abt brian #it had already been establishedt #i made my bed imma fukin lie in it

[positivelylinsey]

4 exes I’ll always care for

I won’t be displaying names for the safety of myself and the people mentioned.

1. My first real girlfriend: we dated several times for short amounts, such as a month here, then 2 months later we dated again for 3 months. Etc. it was like that for about 2 years. But she and I were close. We called everyday. She would mail me packages and I’d do the same. We were far apart but we cared for each other like we were next door neighbors. We broke up due to immaturity & we stayed friends for most of the time afterwards, if we stopped being friends it’s was due to someone either she was dating or someone I was dating, but we are currently good friends and talk almost daily.

2. The first person that “I love you” was meaningful to hear and say. We were very far apart, not as far as the last one mentioned, but still about 8 hours. I was his first love and he was mine. I remember cherishing every single call we had. I remember staying up until 4 AM playing video games with him. He was seriously my best friend. And we continue to keep the friendship 2 1/2-3 years later. We broke up because I chose lust over love. Idiot me.

3. This one. This one fucked me up to my core. I still care deeply about this person. He was literally my entire world. I saw everything with him. He was and continues to be my longest relationship. He was literally the reason I smiled. If we were fighting, I was unhappy. I would do ANYTHING to make him happy. I’d stay up late at night even when I had to work the next day or if we had school the next day(which usually would be around 6/7 AM for both). I would listen to him cry. We would FaceTime for DAYS in a single call if we weren’t able to see each other. We went to the same school but neither of us could drive at first & he lived about 25/30 minutes away. I remember when I did get to see him, I cherished every single fucking second with that man. Even if it was only for 10 minutes bc my parents drove me out there. His family was like my own, we were super close, he was the first person I let meet my family. He attended my brother’s funeral & held me close every time the tears started to worsen. I know this one is longer than the others, but we spent 2 years together and he was the first person who watched me be an adult. He was so special, he was my first & I still care deeply about his wellbeing. Although he and I aren’t speaking any longer, I wish him the absolute best. We broke up because I couldn’t trust someone who had cheated on me. I tried to look past the cheating but it was too hard.

4. My most recent ex. We only dated for 5 months, but we did everything together. We lived a road apart, he got me my first car, helped me get my license, took me everywhere, we were best friends. I’m not sure if I was in love with him because I was still damaged by the relationship before him (#3) but I cared about him & I still do. His family was like my own but better. His mom let me drive her charger all the time. Yes, like the expensive ass car. She would buy me anything I wanted, which is why I never mentioned things I wanted around her bc the first time I did I said I liked her Louis Vuitton bag and ended up with a Louis Vuitton wallet worth more than my car lol. But anyways, we were so close. If he was off work & I wasn’t, I would get off by noon and drive to his house just so I could take a nap with him. We would hang out just to nap together. I also lost a baby with him. It hits hard to mention it sometimes. But it’s reality. I’m not sure what he and I are, friends? Enemies? I’m not sure. We talked a few days ago and things were fine but awkward. His family and I are still super close and I got to take their dog home because I fell in love with her throughout mine and his relationship. We broke up because I wouldn’t let my past go and just continued to be toxic to him and argue over everything bc I was hung up over what my ex did to me. He was still toxic in ways but everyone carried toxicity in them.

This is something I’m posting in case I ever need reminded of why things ended the way they did. I’m sure I’ll add more & put more of the negative reasons in the next one but for now I’d like to reminisce on the good things rather the bad.

#goth #aesthetic #alternative #single #emo girl #bisexual #relationship #ex bf #ex boyfriend #ex gf #ex girlfriend #toxicity #closure