#and her response was ~well I told you numerous times to clean it out~

[risingoftime]

𝖈𝖔𝖒𝖊 𝖆𝖓𝖉 𝖘𝖊𝖊 𝖒𝖊 | 𝖘𝖍𝖚𝖗𝖎 𝖔 𝖋𝖊𝖒!𝖗𝖊𝖆𝖉𝖊𝖗

a/n: thank you anon for the request! I appreciate ya'll for being patient with me cause I am inconsistent with this shit. I hope I made it worth your while babes xo! Click the title for a song rec.

synopsis: Shuri is frustrated from being unable to keep her mind off of you, and you don't make it any easier. Amidst being long-distance and the bickering, you're unsure how to fix things between you. Then, a surprise visit forces Shuri to choose between the lab and love.

word count: 2.6k

warnings: alternate universe, university student!shuri, model!reader, SMUT, smut with no plot, oral, finger sucking, tribbing/scissoring, masturbation, fingering, light dom!shuri, edging, sex toy (vibrator), overstimulation, makeup sex.

18+ | minors do not interact

➴ feel free to send me more thots

I adjusted my camera tripod so that it faced me. The natural sunlight lit up my hotel room as I fumbled with the toy vibrating in my hand. Laying back on the freshly cleaned white sheets, I placed them between my legs, already slick from my arousal. I couldn’t stop my wandering mind from imagining it was Shuri’s fingers stroking me instead. Foreheads pressed against each other, watching her move her hand to push two fingers in and out of my pussy. I let out a breathy moan as I felt my walls tighten around her. I didn’t want to let her go. I could practically feel her presence against me. The vibrator increased its speed, circling my clit. I envisioned Shuri watching me as I got close to cumming. Observing how my back arches, I angle my body to get better access to the pulsating device. I deeply yearned for her touch, feeling sensitive and in need. I’ve never been this wet before, and It’s been so long since Shuri and I were able to be intimate.

“Shuri,” I moaned. 

It became more difficult to hold back. Finally, I gave myself over to the overwhelming pleasure that had grown inside my abdomen and no longer silenced the sounds that escaped my mouth. I threw my head back and rolled my hips forward, urging and pleading for Shuri to touch me instead. A heavy wave of lust passed through me as I rode to orgasm. My limbs began to relax, and I felt like I could melt into the hotel bed. Except she wasn’t there with me, and I was alone. Unhinging the iPhone from the tripod, I scrolled through our messages and hit send. 

Come and see me. @ Sonder 907 Main room 303.

As soon as I saw the video delivered, I felt my anxiety rise, waiting for her response. Shuri would spend hours and hours away from her phone when she was in the lab. It’s one of the main reasons why we’ve been fighting. At times I felt like my attention wasn’t enough for her. Something was constantly popping up at her internship, and I’ve tried to be understanding, but I’m rarely a priority. Shuri has always been a big dreamer, convinced she would cure cancer and otherworldly diseases, and I believe her. She’s almost completed her joint major in computer science and molecular biology, but I don't know if we’d last to see her cross the stage with her degree.

I can't resist the desire during the hours I’m alone without her. Booking a hotel near Shuri's campus may have been impulsive, but long-distance has never done me well. Especially with the break between modelling jobs after New York fashion week, this is the only time I’d have to spend with Shuri. I set down my phone and cleaned myself up in the shower. Once I finished, I wasn’t sure how much time had passed as I got ready for her arrival, whenever that would be. Slipping on my black robe, I checked my phone to see numerous missed calls from Shuri. It had only been less than an hour, and she should’ve been in the laboratory now. I would've sent a video sooner if I knew it was this easy to get her attention. I jumped from the knock on my door and peeked through the peephole to see Shuri. I took a deep breath and opened the door. 

“What are you doing here? I told you that I needed space.” Shuri’s face was set in stone and unmoving, not giving away the dormant emotions. A coping mechanism. But her eyes softened when she saw the short silk robe that barely hid the lacy lingerie underneath. 

“And I came so we could work it out like we always do.” Her straight facial expression slipped away, and she laughed at my double innuendo before stepping closer in my direction and closed the hotel door behind her. “No, you came to frustrate and finish me off.”

“Hi to you too, by the way. It looks like the video did its job; I finally got you out of the lab.” I rolled my eyes and moved away from Shuri. Her footsteps followed me to the main bedroom until her chest was against my back. I could feel her heavy breathing as if she was trying to calm herself. “Be honest. You’re not mad at me for dropping out of MIT. You’re upset I left. But I saw an opportunity and took it! Just like you did with your internship. The difference is that I make time for you,” I struggled to get the words out without raising my voice. I tried not to sound accusatory, but each sentence had more conviction than the last. I was wrong if I thought that Shuri would react to my anger. Instead, she wrapped her arms around my waist, pulling me closer until nothing else mattered. 

“I never left, baby. You are the first and last person I speak to every day, I may not respond right away, and I’m sorry okay? I’m sorry.” Shuri’s lips hovered over my ear as her hands slowly unravelled the tie around my robe. I felt her long fingers trace over the hem of my lace panties, and my breath hitched at the possibility of her dipping further. 

“You think it’s just that easy? So that’ll forgive you just like that?” I sighed. She always left me in a trance just by her touch, and now, with her sucking on my neck, I felt my knees begin to give out. I’ve been craving this for so long, longing for us. But I wasn’t going to give in. My hand hovered over Shuri’s before I removed it and turned to face her. I had to go on my tippy toes to be face to face. It took all of my self-restraint not to act upon my lust. 

“What can I do to make it right? I’ll get on my knees for you. When you moaned my name on that tape, I practically fell to the ground.” Shuri’s voice had a certain raspiness when she got turned on. The way she looked at me, it was clear that her control was slowly slipping. 

“Tell me how bad you need me.”

“I need you like the air I breathe.”

Shuri responded without missing a beat, and the silence between us afterwards stretched out as we stood still, staring into each other's eyes and anticipating the other’s next act. It only took one move, and it was Shuri that took action. Her hands caressed and groped my ass before lowering her head to bring her lips to mine. The kiss was feverish and all-consuming. I hadn’t noticed that we reached the bed until the back of my legs hit the edge of the mattress, causing me to fall on top of the duvet. 

“I’m going to fuck you until you can’t walk properly,” Shuri purrs. Her hands rubbed down along my waist, unabashedly greedy, until she reached the delicate fabric that hardly covered my pussy. Wasting no time, she practically ripped the lace discarding it to the side of the room. This is a side of her that I had not experienced. There was something feral about how she looked at me, like I was her prey for the taking. Shuri’s fingers stroked me, teasing my entrance without entering further. Simultaneously leaving love marks across my neck and breasts, without care about who might see them the next day. 

“Stop playing with me,” I begged. 

“Always so needy. You interrupted my work, and now I’m taking my time with you.” 

I let out a shallow whimper while pushing myself desperately against Shuri’s hands, searching for an inch she hadn’t put inside me. Instead, she spent another few minutes slowly worshipping my body, making my bare skin undeniably hot and sensitive. 

“Fuck Shuri”  I already felt pent-up from how long it’s been since we’ve had sex. I couldn’t stop thinking how much I wanted Shuri. 

“Shut up” Not an ounce of patience in her voice. She swore under her breath as she inserted her two fingers inside of me harder than anticipated. “Shit, you’re so tight,” she sighed into the crook of my neck. Shuri moved in a steady, punishing rhythm. I gasped and trembled against her body. My nails dug into her skin underneath her t-shirt, clinging to her as she mercilessly drilled inside me. With each thrust, she got deeper and deeper until the pads of her fingers brushed against my G-spot. 

"Oh, God, yes, I’m gonna cum” I cried. 

“Shh… just a little more.” 

I was unsure how much further I could hold back the bliss threatening to spill onto the sheets. Shuri was now acutely aware of my throbbing center and quivering thighs, my skin on display below, consumed by pulsating pleasure. Her mouth was slightly agape between sloppy kisses, pausing when our lips barely touched and breathing each other's air. Her eyes shut as her eyebrow furrowed in concentration as if trying to envision what she felt, the sensations she caused to run through my body. All that could be heard in the room was our deep breathing and the bed rocking. 

“Shuri, please, don’t stop. I’m so close.” 

Suddenly, Shuri forcefully pinned my wrists above my head with one hand and watched as I struggled to keep my composure while her thumb massaged my slit. “You sound so good, begging for it.” I don’t know if I was easy to decipher or if Shuri knew my body well. Yet, as my begging got louder and staggered, her pace became faster and harder until my climax came over me with a rush that caused my eyes to roll back. “Shit, you have such a tight hold on me,” Shuri whispered. I felt the wet spot beneath form in response. The tension that had a hold on my muscles relaxed against her. Finally, she removed herself from inside of me agonizingly slow to suck on her fingers before putting her mouth over mine. I could taste myself on her while she swirled her tongue around mine. It was all-consuming and hard to decipher what was to come next. Shuri was everywhere. 

Shuri parted from me to remove her shirt and reveal her toned dark skin, alluding to the late-night gym sessions she snuck in when she had time away from work and school. Her arms flexed when she groped my thighs to slide my body down to get closer to her. She left wet kisses on my chest, licking my sternum to my abdomen. Shuri paused there momentarily, leaving me in anticipation for her to move lower. Instead, she made eye contact with me while her tongue parted my folds, gliding up the wetness dripping. My hands played with the tips of her curls, tugging slightly when the tip got close to my overly sensitive clit. I couldn’t resist pushing my waist upwards, urging her to lick harder and take all of me in her mouth. Her eyes never left mine, not for a second. The noise I let out would’ve made me ashamed if I had heard it back, but Shuri encapsulated me.

“You like messing with my head, don’t you?” I asked. She’s been edging me with each lick and stroke, and- “fuck I’m all yours.” I would be hers, Shuri’s one and only. All my brain could think about was inching myself near. My hands were tangled in her hair, keeping her head still while I rubbed my pussy against Shuri’s face. Her nose bumped against my clit as her tongue delved deeper inside. “you drive me insane, and you don’t even know.” She mumbled against my clit in between licks. With each second, the waves of sensation became impossible to stay in one place. Just when I thought it could get any worse, Shuri began sucking on my clit with sensuous desperation. I could hear myself panting, my pussy throbbing as she began ramping up the intensity. “Yes, give it to me, all of it.” As if on her command, my muscles began spasming and just when I had felt like I was on the verge of exploding, I had let it all out, soaking Shuri’s lips and chin. 

“I- I never knew I could do that,” I whispered. I never knew that my body could release that much all at once. 

“Shit, I didn’t either.” Shuri laughed to herself as she wiped her chin and bottom lip with the palm of her hand. She pushed herself off the bed to unzip her pants and discard the rest of her clothes. I analyzed her body as she stripped before pulling herself over me, aligning her core with mine until she settled on me. The feeling of her warm wetness gliding against mine made me moan. 

“Tell me how I feel.” 

“Feels so good.” Shuri mumbled, looking blissed-out and high as fuck, with her eyes barely open. 

I couldn’t get enough of the way Shuri rocked back down against me, making hot, needy noises as she felt her body’s movement sync with mine. She tried to take her time and move slowly, but she ran out of patience. Shuri groaned, “Don’t stop,” a raspy noise compared to mine. I lifted my hips slightly as Shuri thrust, making the bed creak and hit the wall. Our cries got louder and louder.

“Tell me you want more.” 

“Baby, you got me addicted- I don’t want to stop.” Her breasts bounced while she moaned and cursed under her breath. She held my thigh to get the right angle to increase the hot friction between our legs. Another hand slightly pressed down on my abdomen as she chanted “yes” repeatedly like a prayer. Shuri’s breath hitched, needy and fragile, but still ready for more. “Yeah,” she says, her voice hoarse. “I want to see you cum for me. Cum in me.” 

“Oh God, Shuri”

“Ride it,” Shuri demanded. It was all the consent needed to grip Shuri’s hips as she heavily descended on me. It felt like I’d been split open and filled full of her, and Shuri didn’t stop until she was fully seated on me without an escape option. “You look so beautiful underneath me like this.” I knew that my hair which was perfectly pressed was now dishevelled against the sheets. Yet, she didn’t stop. Her hands kept roaming my breast and torso. Shuri wanted to feel me lose it and come apart under her command while I rolled my hips roughly into her. “A-aah, I’m coming,” Shuri gasped when she felt the warm spill of her orgasm drip on my skin. I trembled in euphoric pleasure till I lost all rhythm and felt Shuri collapse onto me in exhaustion. Our chests heaved up and down while we tried to catch our breath. I felt slightly lightheaded as I searched for the words to speak after it all.

“I think the only way to get you out of my head is to have you like this instead.” The way that Shuri muttered the words seemed as if she was saying it more to herself than to me. 

“Then why don’t you do it more often?” I smiled when she brushed my hair to the side with her hands to get a better view of my face. Her gaze was trained on me with a look in her eye that I couldn’t quite decipher. 

“Because if I do, I’ll never want to leave.”

#time creation #shuri x black!reader #shuri x fem!reader #x black fem reader #x black reader #shuri udaku #shuri black panther #wakanda forever #black panther fic #shuri fanfiction #smut #shameless smut #shuri smut #mcu black panther #mcu #come and see me #marvel #lgbtq #lesfic #wlw #sapphic #modern au #mcu risingoftime #time request #mcu shuri #mcu fic #alternate universe #black panther #⟢CREATION OF TIME

[marvelousfangirl01]

ACKERMAN’S LAMENT (Chapter 7: Kill)

RATING: M for Graphic Depictions of Violence Also available at https://archiveofourown.org/works/39566685/chapters/101491461 :)

---

During any battle of any kind, Levi’s mind became intensely focused. It turned crystalline, allowing his body to do what it had been trained to do with no question. It was an automatic response.

And it was Berner’s unfortunate mistake to get in the way of that automatic response.

“Captain, we can’t see the titan yet. Is it really best to waste gas and fly toward it? Why don’t we wait until it gets closer?” Moblit chirped.

Levi stood up on his horse, preparing to switch to ODM gear. “That isn’t part of the plan. Shut up and do what you’ve been told to do numerous times.”

Moblit growled as he rose atop his horse as well. Fiddling with his ODM, Hange’s assistant was left in the dust as Levi vaulted into the skies. His anchors hooked onto a tall tree, allowing him to pivot and fly. Levi was something from a child’s adventure dream: soaring effortlessly through the air with smoke pursuing him. The wind rushing in his face made Levi’s eyes dry, so he blinked hard to clear them before he came too close to the titan. His ears permanently processed the whisk of an air current, so it was second nature for Levi to ignore that sound. His thoughts were lucid, distracted by nothing.

“Captain!” Moblit flew up next to him, attached to a tree adjacent to Levi’s. “I made it! Your orders?”

“Glad to see you,” Levi bit out, hardly looking at the boy except to give orders. “Move to the titan’s left side in case things go sideways. I’m taking the right side with Mike.”

He was off before he fully heard Moblit’s response—what was there to respond to? This had been the plan all along. Sometimes Moblit’s stupidity appalled Levi. He wondered how the astute Hange had selected the asinine Moblit as her lab partner.

Levi’s anchors frolicked from tree to tree until he hitched to the titan. The anchor planted itself into the titan’s firm muscle. Finally up close and personal with the monster, he was able to get a good look at it. This one seemed even larger than Levi’s original estimate of ten meters. He swung up the side of the titan, roughly measuring its length while he was at it. The thing had to be at least fifteen to twenty meters.

Mike was anchored next to Levi and rappelling down the chest of the titan. “Be careful! This one almost got me; it’s hungry.” Mike dug his gleaming blade into the titan’s chest and used it to slide down toward Levi. An L-shaped gash was left on the beast where Zacharius had traveled, oozing steam as it promptly sealed up.

“They’re all hungry...” Levi shot another anchor up to the titan’s cheek and took to the air. Mike nodded his head affirmatively at that. “I’ll be careful though,” Levi called down to Mike with a smirk as he rode the cable upward.

The titan opened its trap and roared upon seeing Levi. The putrid smell of bones and blood wafted into his face. It was enough to make the clean freak gag, but Levi choked back his disgust and instead vomited words.

“You idiots... you don’t know when to quit, do you?” Levi propelled his blade into the titan’s eye and dodged its eager hand, swiveling around on the single blade. “You missed me.”

Levi’s palms were on fire while using his free sword to gain leverage. He stabbed the spare weapon into the titan’s forehead and used it like a handle. The unabating pull at his waist reminded him that he was reaching the extent of his cable. “Fuck.” Levi released his anchor from far below and instead knotted the cord around the titan’s neck. He rolled onto the titan’s flat head and flexed his dry hands, relieving the muscles inside.

A tsunami of titan blood coated Levi just as he was about to stand up. “What the fuck, Berner?!”

Moblit detached his blade from the titan’s fore, leaving a canyon of blood in his wake. He slid onto his knees, crash-landing from the rather messy flight. “Mind if I join you for the scenic view? I need a break from this thing.” Moblit grinned and wiped his face. Levi could already feel the blood dissolving, but by god, he hated the way it crinkled and dried while it was still tangible.

Levi avoided the pudgy paw of the titan once again by anchoring and heading down to the nape. Moblit was too far away for the impact, but Levi wished he would get obliterated already. “Better watch out, or else this titan will give you one hell of a break,” Levi spat.

Levi drew his blade and prepared to attack. The titan swatted at him again, but was too slow for the expert fighter. With his calves and feet aflame from the weight of holding himself up in his gear, Levi gave a final clean slash in the nape and landed on the shoulder of the titan.

The behemoth hollered in agony as it lost its balance from the blow. “Gotcha.” Levi moved his hair from his face and tried not to breathe too much. More blood had covered him, especially taking an interest in his face. Levi groaned. As much as he wanted to wipe the blood away, he knew it would dissolve eventually and there was no use in spreading the liquid elsewhere on his body. Levi affixed himself to a tree down below and closed his eyes, hoping to avoid the drip of bodily cherry juice into his eyes. The liquid leisurely meandered over his eyelids.

“Let’s go, Berner!”

Moblit was pulling himself from the titan’s head and trying to find a spot to dock his anchor. He finally secured himself to the same tree as Levi. Even as the titan fell, Moblit somehow stayed upright and didn’t panic.

Moblit and Levi landed together, linking with the rest of the group to the far right of the now-dead titan.

“That was fucking awesome!” The manic voice of Hange approached Levi and Moblit. Her horse clip-clopped quickly, just as excited as she.

Moblit smiled at her. “Thank you, Section Commander,” he said proudly. Levi resisted the urge to plunge his blade into Moblit’s neck as he had done to the titan. What was he so proud about? If anything, Moblit had just gotten in the way. Levi could’ve taken that titan all on his own.

“…But it was really Captain Levi who earned the kill.” Moblit gently clapped Levi on the back. Levi looked up inquisitively at the boy.

“Thanks, Berner.”

Hange reached out and gave both of them a simultaneous hug. “But we really should’ve captured it, boys,” Hange added. “It would’ve made such a fine addition to my research subjects!” She patted their heads. Moblit blushed.

“You smell, Hange.” Levi realized he was subconsciously breathing the smell of Hange, taking it like a gift because he knew he wouldn’t be so close to her for a while. “When was the last time you bathed?”

Hange adjusted her head the subtlest bit so she was facing Levi. Their lips were nearly touching from this perspective.

Never did Levi think he’d be in a group hug with both Hange and Moblit, but to have Hange so close to him while Moblit was left alone? Well, Levi enjoyed it far more than he’d ever admit.

Hange beamed devilishly. “No clue.”

Levi shoved her away, a complete contradiction to how much he was enjoying this. He hadn’t expected to have a moment with Hange during the mission, but he figured he would make the most of it while here. “You’re disgusting. You could take a bath in a titan’s slobber and you’d still be cleaner than normal.”

He could see in Hange’s eyes how badly she wanted to kiss him. “Is that a challenge?” Hange wrinkled her nose with delight.

“All right!” Commander Erwin mounted his horse and signaled everyone else to do the same. The excitement in the ranks died down. “Resume your positions. We need to keep moving!”

Levi smiled smugly at Hange. I’d be happy to bathe you, four-eyes. And you won’t have to go anywhere near a titan.

Levi and Moblit diffused from Hange and headed back to their formation. Moblit was quiet, no words spoken. Something was wrong with him. But the kindhearted boy didn’t say what was on his mind, so Levi didn’t need to worry.

The soldiers split into a different formation as they entered the forest. Moblit and Levi went alone on the outskirts of the forest while the other teams split off in the interior. Hange’s team went deep into the thick trees, their horses and tan jackets immediately disappearing into the green.

As the clatter of horse hooves became faint, and Moblit gave his final directions to the other teams, Levi realized the true test to his character would begin now. He had Moblit alone. They made surface-level conversation as they scoured for a possible hideout. Trees were either too thin or too close to titan territory for a camping ground, so they had to continue searching for many meters. Meters upon meters of dreadful shallow chatter and “how has this war been treating you?” (Moblit) and “you’re growing out of your uniform” (Levi) and “where are you from?” (Moblit again; and Levi’s least favorite of the boy's conversation starters).

They found an adequate patch of land to set the pop-up base upon. The sky was visible through the canopy of emerald leaves, but there was a concurrent effect of protection and privacy from the outside world. There was even a small pond about eight-hundred meters away. Side-by-side with Berner, Levi could see the boy’s grin of approval.

“This’ll do,” Levi said. He signaled his horse to halt. Moblit did the same. He had harnessed the camp gear on the back of his horse with a knot—thankfully his ragtag knot had withstood the horse ride. Levi would’ve thought the puny boy’s apples and water flask, along with the military gear, would be strewn everywhere as a result of one Moblit Berner’s poor knot-tying skills.

Revisiting his thoughts from the titan encounter, Levi allowed himself to indulge and imagine his shining blade in Moblit’s tawny neck. This blood wouldn’t dissolve, though—Moblit and Levi would both be tainted in the ruby gems of Berner’s insides. For someone who was so tidy, Levi found he wouldn’t care if it was Moblit’s blood on his hands.

No. Levi would make this hurt. So he rewound his fantasy and played it from the very beginning.

He saw Moblit’s sad, slender face contort as the blade plunged first into his stomach and then traced slashes up his chest. Heard his cry as he doubled over weakly—not even willing to fight back against humanity’s strongest soldier. One foot in front of the other, Moblit was barely still standing. Then, teasing Moblit with little bursts of pain, Levi would cut accent marks into his shoulder blades. The blood might make stripes of all sizes and thicknesses, all the way down Moblit’s rawboned chest and back, until it trickled down his legs and landed in little pools at his feet. “And now, Berner…” Levi was close, so close. “You’re going to die.”

“Help!” Moblit bawled, but he gulped down his words as Levi’s sword made the final incision into his neck. Moblit hacked up his blood and knelt to the ground, violently sick. He moaned and screamed through his retching, so desperate for someone—anyone—to save him. Someone, take him far away from this cold-blooded killer he had unluckily been paired with!

“Help!”

How the hell is he still speaking? Levi trudged around the boy who was a corpse in front of him. Just to make sure the deed was done, Levi rammed his rapier down Moblit’s throat.

“Help me, Levi!”

A sack of tent flaps hit Levi square in the back. “Shit!” The bag tumbled down to his horse’s feet. Levi, regaining his bearings and coming back to the headache of greenery surrounding him, disembarked from his horse and picked up the bag.

#levihan #rivahan #levi ackerman #hange zoe #commander hange #angst #jealousy #implied smut #possessive #moblit berner #mobuhan #aot fanfiction #fanfiction

[jplupine]

In the Wolf's Den: Chapter 4

Pairing: The Weeping Monk x Devin [Nonbinary Fey OC] Word Count: ~5.6k WARNINGS: 18+ MDNI, Exophilia, Feral Behavior, Angst, Religious Trauma, Little Spot of Fluff

Summary: The monk and his confliction, Yeva and her prying.

You can also read it on AO3!

Masterlist | Chapter 4:

  Cleaning out Goliath's hooves, I learned the horse was rather well-behaved. He calmly stood there as I had his hoof held between my thighs to keep it steady while I scraped out the layers of mud and dead plant material. The horse was also clearly well taken care of- his coat was sleek, his shoes still fit, and his hooves were in good condition.

  My ears perked to attention when I heard movement, but I didn't look up since it came from the direction of the cave. The monk was up and walking again on his own already. However, it had only been three days since he and Squirrel had gotten here, and he still had a limp.

  "Where is Percival?" His voice was low with a worried edge.

  "At the river. I told him to get cleaned up before my nose fell off." Looking up at the monk, I raised my eyebrows. "You're going as soon as he comes back." The man didn't say anything in response and simply gave a small nod instead. "....You're a lot quieter than before, monk. Does it hurt to speak, or have you decided to just let Squirrel do all the talking?"

  The monk shifted on his feet while crossing his arms and dropping his gaze. I saw his jaw clench before he looked to the side.

  "I," He cleared his throat. "I wasn't myself last time. This is how I usually am."

  "How convenient." My tone was flat as I dropped Goliath's hoof now that it was clean. I moved to get the next hoof done, but the monk spoke up again.

  "If you want to say something to me, just say it." His words made me pause for a second before I stood up all of the way.

  "Alright, then. You're pissing me off. You wind up back here and act like a beat dog as if you didn't use me like some cheap whore the last time you were here." My words had a biting edge, and the monk's cheeks tinted pink.

  "Did you not use me the same?" He retorted in that quiet, husky voice of his. My ears flicked back as my hackles raised.

  "It is not the same."

  "How is it not?"

  "I was in heat!" I rose my voice as my grip tightened on the tool in my hand. "Do you even understand what that does to someone? The clouded mind? My body betraying what I want?" His cheeks flushed more as he looked ashamed.

  "I do understand. But you are ignoring what it did to me as well. I am the Weeping Monk, my deeds renowned, and I am a devout Christian. Your pheromones made me feel....things. Do things I never would have nor wanted."

  "If that is true, then you should know exactly how I feel, monk." I growled with disdain.

  "I deserve your hatred for numerous things, but you cannot blame me for what happened then."

  "Can't I?" He still wouldn't look at me and shifted on his feet again. The monk seemed to be thinking to pick his next words carefully before he sighed through his nose.

  "It was like I was drunk. I could not think straight. I was always....hot. Once your heat cleared, I finally realized what I had done. It horrified me." His jaw clenched as he kept his eyes on the ground. "It just further proved that I am devil born."

  My anger froze at his words since it took me a second to process what he meant. I finally noticed his expression and guarded body language and realized he wasn't lying. He didn't feel the exact same as I did about our previous encounter, but he was in a similar boat.

  And he had that damn Christian guilt to boot.

  "You are not devil born, you idiot." I snarled.

  "Then why did I enjoy it?!" He finally snapped, raising his voice as he looked at me. "I hate what I did. I hate how I liked it. What I did with you goes against everything I believe in. I was tested, and I was too weak, and now....now you haunt my dreams." The monk trailed off and averted his gaze again. "I am possessed by these vile thoughts of a Fey."

  "Gods, do you even hear yourself?"

  "Then explain it to me since you know better." He neared me while having a challenging tone. "Go on. Tell me how it is not the work of the devil that I am haunted by you." The monk grabbed my wrist and lifted my free hand as he looked down at me. "You may not have left any visible marks, but these damned hands have branded my flesh."

  I found myself without words as I looked into those blue eyes of his. I'd been in denial, but what he was saying was making me face how I truly felt. I was guilt-ridden because deep down I knew....I knew I liked it, too.

  I missed his touch and how good it felt....but I hated who was attached to those warm hands of his. I missed his lips on my skin but hated him. I missed the pleasure and was pissed by who caused it.

  And I knew exactly what he meant when he said he was haunted- I, too, would dream of him. If my mind wandered too far, I could practically feel him against me again. Gods, did I lust for this beautiful man, but I knew he was a monster, and I couldn't let myself indulge those desires.

  "Fine, I will explain it to you, monk. It's called being horny. Your repressed ass finally got a taste of sex, you enjoyed it, and now you want more. Simple as that." I lowly growled before snatching my wrist out of his hand. "And for the last fucking time, I am not a demon."

  "You have to be."

  "And why is that? Because you believe sex is sinful so you enjoying it must mean I am evil?" I wanted to roll my eyes but tensed at the look in his eyes.

  "Why else would I begin to doubt?" He muttered. "Why else would I have the urge to come back?"

  "I swear the Christians are fucking idiots. You wanted to come back because it felt good. I don't know why you insist on involving some damn devil with it." Turning away, I tried to go back to cleaning Goliath's hooves.

  "You respond like it doesn't matter, yet continue to hate me for it." The monk grabbed my upper arm to make me look at him again. "Why are you free to be disgusted, but I'm not?"

  "Let me go."

  "Answer me."

  "Because I'm not a monster!" I swung my arm to get him to back away and let me go. The monk looked shocked as if he'd been slapped in the face. "You are a genocidal hypocrite who would rather believe in the ideals of murderers and turn your back on your own kind! You are a sick bastard that has aided in burning villages to the ground. All of which I have not done. You are the monster, not me."

  I was shaking while baring my fangs at the monk. It took all of my self-control to not stab the man right at that moment.

  There was a brief stretch of silence that felt longer than it truly was. The monk's expression shifted as he slowly went down to his knees. Holding his hands out at his sides, he closed his eyes, and I was confused.

  What was he doing?

  It was almost as if he were putting himself at my mercy.

  "What are you doing?"

  "Kill me." He said with a serious tone. "Please." I was utterly shocked to the point my mouth hung partially open. The feeling only intensified when the monk opened his eyes, and they were watering, brimming with real tears. "Maybe in death, I can atone. Please, I cannot bear it any longer."

  Just who was this monk begging for death? That expression, those words- they could only come from someone who was very broken. But I wasn't about to coddle him.

  Leaning down with my arms crossed over my chest, my face hovered just a few inches from his. Tears streaked down his cheeks as he didn't move a muscle, waiting for what I'd do next. His eyes looked so blue as he cried.

  "Do you really think I would give you such a mercy? You want to atone, Christian?" I said the word as if it were dirty. "Then you make amends. You toil and struggle and suffer what you have done, and then you make it up to your brethren. You have many years of pain to make up for, monk. One death is not enough for the many you have caused. You need to help rebuild what you destroyed." My tone was cold as I looked down at the monk.

  I paused to let my words sink in before I continued.

  "You are beginning to realize just how lost you are, aren't you, Lancelot?" I questioned, and his eyes widened at my words. Tears were dripping from his jaw and soaking into his shirt as he finally lowered his arms.

  Staring at him, watching him, I think I was beginning to realize what Squirrel saw in him beyond a valuable asset. The monk had done many a terrible thing, but he'd been bent into such an unrecognizable state that he had no sense of himself. The Red Paladins had truly done their work on the man to make him this way.

  Standing up straight, I turned toward Goliath.

  "I'm glad we had this conversation. Now, get up before Squirrel returns and sees you acting like a fool." Picking up the horse's back hoof, I gently placed it between my thighs and set to work on scraping it clean.

  The monk sniffled and took a second to rise. He wiped his face while limping back toward the cave. Hesitating, I glanced up to watch him for a second.

  Did I just complicate things further for the better or worse? The monk was clearly conflicted with himself already, and I was rather harsh. However, I felt as if I was justified.

  Sitting at my table, I was trying to think of what to write in the letter I'd ask Yeva to deliver. How was I supposed to explain Squirrel was under my care and trying to find home with the Weeping Monk in tow? Any sane reaction to such news would be 'no, but fuck no'.

  Should I ask Squirrel for advice? He knew his friends and how they might react to such things.

  Resting my head in my palm, I stared down at the blank piece of parchment while thinking. The boy was just outside, whittling that stick that was beginning to look like a bow, so it wouldn't be a hassle to call him in for help. But I did want to try and think of something on my own first.

  Someone entered the cave, and a pleasant scent tickled my nose. The woods after a rain, a touch of florals, and a hint of something smokier. Gods, I forgot how nice the monk smelled since he'd been so dirty when he arrived.

  Then I felt heat rise in my cheeks because my tail had begun to wag at the scent. Had my subconscious so easily associated that scent with pleasure? My ears went back in embarrassment as I tried to ignore the monk's presence.

  He took a seat near the pit, and I could hear quiet rustling. There was still a tension in the air between us but of a different kind now. It was as if neither of us knew what to do now after what happened earlier.

  Discreetly peeking over my shoulder, I wanted to see what the monk was doing since he was still making noise.

  He was gathering up his still-damp hair to tie it back with a strip of leather, struggling a bit due to the wound on his shoulder. Chewing the inside of my cheek, I turned back to the parchment on the table. I wanted to say something but needed a way to say it without it coming off wrong.

  "You should try a braid." I spoke up, and the monk paused. "It would hide the cross....make it harder for you to be identified. It really is a dead giveaway." There was no response at first until the monk finally spoke up.

  "I don't know how to braid." His voice was barely over a whisper. Softly sighing through my nose, I hesitated before getting up from my stool. Standing behind the monk, I brushed my fingers through his hair to straighten it out as much as possible.

  Even wet, his dark waves still stood out. The monk sat with a straight spine while I gathered up 3 parts at the top of his head to keep his hair out of his face. I braided toward the back, gathering more hair as I went.

  My job was made easier by the fact that he didn't shave the entire crown of his head. The monk was quiet and still the whole time my fingers worked, and by the time I was tying the leather strip around the end of the braid, the cross had completely disappeared beneath his hair. However, when I glanced over his shoulder, I saw how tightly he was gripping his trousers in each fist.

  Was he scared or just really nervous? Gods, he was such a mystery.

  Not even bothering to question it, I returned to my seat. Looking at that blank parchment once more, I still had no clue what to write. I could feel eyes on me from behind from how intently the monk was staring.

  "....Thank you." He muttered.

  "You're welcome." I quietly responded before looking toward the entrance of my cave. "Squirrel? I could use your help in here."

  "With what?" The boy questioned as soon as he walked in with a knife and stick in hand.

  "What language would your friends find the least alarming? I'm not sure how I should mention your....travel companion."

  "What have you got so far?" Squirrel questioned while setting his things down on the table. As soon as he saw the parchment was completely blank, he gave me a look. I stared him dead in the eye with a straight face.

  "I'm not in the habit of writing to strangers."

  "I should only be gone a few days. Two weeks at most if I have to take the longer routes." I said while packing some supplies into my bag. "If I'm gone longer, it's best to assume I'm dead, so don't get any bright ideas of trying to find me." I pointedly looked at Squirrel as I closed my bag.

  "Can I have your stuff if you're dead? Not like you will be needing it if you are." Squirrel popped off, and I chuckled while ruffling his hair.

  "Sure. But at least wait to make sure before you start digging through my things." Tossing my bag over my shoulder, I exited the cave and stepped into the warm sun. Tying my cloak around my shoulders, I looked back at the other two. "Do try not to wander while I'm gone."

  "You should take Goliath." The monk spoke up while glancing at the horse. "It'll be faster."

  "Are you sure? You'll be without a horse if something happens."

  "Your cave is naturally hidden and away from any paths. We'll be fine." He replied, and I knew he had a point. If anyone did happen to travel by, the ivy made the cave hard to notice unless one knew what they were looking for.

  And, given its location, it was rather far out of anyone's way to be stumbled upon. The only reason the monk had found it was because of his hound-like nose- something humans didn't possess at all.

  "All right. How does he ride?"

  "That horse is bloody fearless." Squirrel answered, and I scoffed. It wasn't exactly what I was asking, but it answered me all the same.

  Getting the reins, I looked at Squirrel and the monk. I figured they'd be fine here on their own. The kid knew how to hunt and make his way to the river and back, and the monk himself was nearly fully healed now, so he, too, could fend for himself if need be. But concern ate at the back of my mind with the fear the Red Paladins just might find them regardless.

  Mounting the horse, I got my paws in the stirrups. Situating my cloak over the saddle, I hid my tail beneath the loose fabric. I then reached back to pull the hood over my head to hide the other dead-giveaway Fey features.

  "Travel safely, you hear?" Squirrel had his hands on his hips while looking up at me.

  "And here I thought you were eager for free stuff." I chuckled, then noticed the monk looking like he wanted to say something. I waited to leave to give him the chance to speak.

  "I....would like to see Goliath again." He said, and I studied his face before the corner of my mouth twitched up.

  "That is a strange way to tell me to be careful, monk." I replied before getting Goliath to trot away from the cave. Having the horse certainly would hasten my travel to Yeva's by quite a bit, so I was thankful the monk had lent me Goliath.

  It seemed he truly did want to make sure Squirrel was safe as soon as possible. Though, with the Red Paladins still on their crusade against the Fey, Squirrel would never truly be safe, only 'safer'. Surely he had to have realized that by now.

  Listening to Goliath's hoofbeats against the earth, I knew I should avoid any of the main roads. Thankfully, I knew of other ways that could get me to where I was going all the same.

  Dismounting, I tied Goliath's reins to a low tree branch just outside of Yeva's home. It looked just as described, a hollow in a pile of twisted roots that blocked out any light with birds scattered about the trees. I'd heard no man-bloods were allowed inside, but I didn't have to worry about that.

  Looking around my surroundings first, I made sure the coast was completely clear before I cautiously walked toward the gnarled roots. My eyes took a second to adjust to the darkness, and I could feel the dirt and dead leaves on the ground beneath my paws. The roots making up the walls twisted tightly together in such an unnatural way.

  Turning at a bend, inside opened up to a wider space where some birds were perched among the roots making up the walls and ceiling. In the center of the room was a hunched-over, old, Moon Wing. She seemed to be doing something with her back to me, and I glanced around.

  Some sunlight managed to come through in here at least.

  "Please, pardon my intrusion." I spoke up while lowering my hood. A hawk called from up above, but Yeva didn't even acknowledge me. "I could really use your help."

  "Deliver the message yourself." She finally spoke, her tone harsh. Her words also proved the rumors that she was able to look into the mind and that only made my nervousness worsen.

  Yeva seemed to immediately pick up on it as she perked up. I swallowed while watching her slowly turn her head to look back at me.

  "You think you can guard your mind from me?"

  "I simply wish to keep some things to myself." My tone was steady even as her piercing eyes were aimed right at me. "I can't deliver the message, I know not where the person I am sending it to is. I heard if anyone could find someone, it would be you."

  "It is not me who finds them." Her gaze lifted as she gestured with her chin toward one of the birds. Glancing in that direction, I saw a proud-looking hawk perched above. "Who is it you are looking for?"

  "Nimue. Someone close to her has come under my care and is trying to find his way back to his people."

  "The Wolf-Blood Witch? Have you not heard? She was lost to a river." Yeva stated, and my tail twitched. I already dreaded having to break such news to Squirrel when I returned.

  "Then Arthur? He was another mentioned."

  "The man-blood?" Her expression seemed to sour more.

  "Yes. I just need the letter sent to someone that knows the boy in my care. He is Sky Folk, and last I heard, they were among Nimue's group."

  "If he is under your care, where is he? Not doing a good job of caring for him if he is not even with you." Her words made the monk pop into my mind, and Yeva cocked her head to the side. "So it's not just the boy." She muttered as she rose to her feet, and my hackles began to rise.

  "The boy is the one that's important." I said rather quickly.

  "So is the man with how you are trying to keep him a secret." She stepped closer, not looking away from me or even blinking as she held me under such an intense gaze. "Who is he?"

  "I do not know." That wasn't technically a lie. I didn't really know who the monk was.

  "Who is he?" She suddenly grabbed my arm, and flashes of the monk began to cross my mind.

  He sat with his back to me as he was polishing his weapons, sword glinting in the sunlight. The monk and Squirrel, sitting across from me by the fire pit as we ate fish and potatoes, his eyes glittering in the fire's light. Then there was a flash of him on his knees, crying while looking up at me as his voice came clear as day.

  "Kill me. Please."

  My memories shifted again against my will as if Yeva were searching my mind for the answer herself. Now it was me looking up at the monk, his sword tilting up my chin, and his face half-covered by that distinct, grey hood.

  I managed to snatch my arm out of the old Fey's grasp while growling a warning. But it was too late, she had her answer. She knew who the other person was.

  "The Weeping Monk." Her tone was flat, her expression as if she wasn't sure what to make of what she saw. "You harbor the Weeping Monk?" Her lips twisted into a snarl, and an owl screeched overhead.

  "It's not that simple."

  "So I saw. But he is still the Weeping Monk. And you want me to send a letter that would lead him right to the Fey?"

  "No. I want you to send a letter to arrange a meeting to figure out what to do. The boy has grown fond of the monk and refuses to do anything without the assurance the monk will be safe."

  "Why does he deserve to be safe?" Yeva asked, and Squirrel's words came to mind about turning the monk against the Red Paladins. "You want me to trust a child's wish?"

  "I know you saw the monk begging for me to kill him. That should say something about his character."

  "If you want me to send your letter, you will show me more." Yeva's tone was serious, and I felt myself go tense. "I am not so easily swayed by weeping, wolf." Clenching my jaw, I glanced over my shoulder, considering just leaving.

  But I couldn't leave. Squirrel needed to get back to his people, and to do that, I needed to get this letter to Arthur. And Yeva was the only way I could do that.

  Shifting on my paws, I hesitated before looking the elder in the eye.

  "I want to believe in the boy, but I will admit I have my doubts. You are the wiser of us....see what you must and tell me if I am a fool for believing." I muttered. Yeva calmly took my hand in hers.

  "Think of the monk." She said, and I did as told. Memories came flooding into my mind. Me attacking the monk and tackling him from his horse, Squirrel intervening, me taking them back to my cave. There were memories of me tending to his wounds and redressing them as needed to prevent infection.

  The monk was peeling potatoes at Squirrel's behest while I showed the boy how to prepare a fish to cook. The memories weren't coming in order either, so the next one was of the monk resting outside the cave as Squirrel and I were brushing down Goliath.

  "He has a name, too. An actual one."

  "Really? I figured he was just always the Weeping Monk."

  "That would be stupid."

  "What is his name then?"

  "Lancelot." The scenery flashed again, changing to inside the cave as I was braiding the monk's hair. It played out until his quiet 'thank you' was uttered, then it was back outside as we were arguing.

  Yeva now got to see part of what led up to the monk on his knees crying and begging for death. She heard my harsh words and how I shouted that the man was a monster. Then the memory jumped in time again to when I was applying a poultice to the monk's wound as I saw the scars on his back.

  "What do you not want me to see?" Yeva's voice seemed to softly echo, and out of my control, the memory of his wounded back flashed to the time I saw those scars before. He was laying on his side in front of me, asleep, and I got up to fetch a drink. I looked back to see he was now awake with his arm under his head.

  That triggered another memory, one of us in bed as a tangle of limbs, desperately groping and kissing. We were panting and moaning, lost in one another in the haze of my heat. His blue eyes so dark from his wide pupils were the last thing I saw before I broke the trance when I pulled my hand away from Yeva.

  My face felt hot as my ears were turned back. I averted my gaze while taking a step back and crossing my arms. Yeva, on the other hand, didn't outwardly react to what she saw.

  I could feel her piercing eyes on me as the quiet stretched on. Thankfully, she broke the silence before I melted from embarrassment and shame. I had tried so desperately to keep those memories away from her, but controlling one's thoughts was an impossible task with how unpredictable the mind could be.

  "So that is what you were hiding."

  "Do not be mistaken- my decisions are not clouded by love."

  "I know. I can feel what you felt in those memories. You are not a complete idiot, wolf. You made your choices based on what you thought was best. You know what he meant by you making him doubt, do you not?" She turned away from me and slowly walked across the room.

  "I am....not sure."

  "The way he looks at you. There is no disdain. You challenge the words of the paladins." Yeva waved her finger over her shoulder. "He sees what you really are, wolf. Your true nature."

  "What is that supposed to mean?"

  "Your heat lowered his defenses, allowing you to worm your way into his head. His own turmoil let it fester, and now that he has returned, those seeds of doubt you sowed are growing."

  "It wasn't as if it was intentional."

  "It doesn't have to be." Yeva moved the proud hawk from its root perch to her covered arm before she looked at me again.

  "You will deliver my message?" My brows knit together as I looked at her.

  "Memories do not lie even if people do. The Weeping Monk is already turning against his precious church." Her expression shifted in the slightest, but I noticed it as she stepped closer. "You need to keep a closer eye on him. He may very well be the last of his kind."

  "You know what he is?"

  "Ash Folk. The eyes are what tells." She dragged a clawed finger across her cheek just beneath her eye. "Touch him with a leaf. You will see." Yeva then held out her hand for my letter.

  Pulling my bag forward, I dug into it for the rolled parchment sealed by a strip of leather. Handing it to the elder, she began to tie it to the hawk's leg.

  "So....you honestly believe me and the boy are doing the right thing?"

  "Taking a powerful weapon from the enemy? It is tricky. But you and the boy appear to easily dig your fingers into the most vulnerable parts of him." She paused as her gaze lifted to me. "That pleases you."

  "As you heard me say, I want him accountable for the suffering he has caused. His back is proof enough that no one could cause that man greater agony than himself."

  "Do you not find that sadistic?"

  "I'm angry. He is too useful alive, so justice cannot be served in blood, but justice is still deserved all the same." I stated, and Yeva seemed to study me for a moment.

  "A bird will come to you if I receive a response. But hear me, wolf. Do not dig your claws in too deep, or the broken man will be too broken to fight."

  Sitting by the fire as Goliath was grazing by a nearby tree, I couldn't help but linger on Yeva's words. At least the Moon Wing elder was able to justify my stance. Not only that, but confirm I indeed did not love the monk.

  Had I somehow fallen for him, my words in his defense to anyone would hold little to no weight. Squirrel's words wouldn't be enough because of him being a child, but mine? Mine would at least be heard.

  However, even though I didn't love the monk, I knew a fondness was growing. Having him away from the Red Paladins, he was showing to be rather docile and curious. He may not ask the questions himself, but he would listen so intently any time I told Squirrel about my people.

  He was quiet, observant, and learning. The church had taught him one thing, but he was seeing for himself the opposite to be true. It was conflicting with his ideals, yet one could not really argue with the truth, only be in denial of it.

  Yeva revealing the Weeping Monk as Ash Folk was also weighing on me. Those Fey had long been thought extinct from these lands. Yet here he was.

  Which only validated my fears that the Red Paladins had stolen him as a child. One could only assume the horrors he must have borne witness to and endured at such a young age. To be stripped of his culture, his people, his family....to turn his back on his own brethren.

  It also made sense why he spared the children and saved Squirrel in particular. He had seen himself in the boy.

  Riding up to my cave, I made Goliath slow down as I heard voices. Looking through the trees, I saw it was Squirrel and the monk in front of the cave. The boy was holding a straight stick the length of his own arm while in a fighting stance.

  I watched from the saddle as Squirrel stepped forward while swinging the stick in familiar movements. Getting the horse to fully stop, I wanted to see more to confirm what I thought was happening.

  "Your enemies are bigger than you. You must aim higher, Percival." The monk's low tone met my ears as he tilted up the stick with his finger. "And remember, you must keep your arms up and ready to switch to defense at any second." He tapped the boy's elbows to adjust his stance.

  I was right. The monk was teaching Squirrel to use a sword. How in gods' name had the boy convinced him to do it?

  "Again." The man ordered, and Squirrel took a few steps back to repeat the sequence. It was then that the monk realized he was being watched- his instincts so keen his eyes snapped right in my direction. The tension left his shoulders when he saw it was me and not anyone else.

  "Training now, are you?" I called out with a smile growing on my lips. Squirrel looked my way and grinned.

  "I told you I would learn. I am a knight, after all." He rested the stick on his shoulder while his other hand was on his hip. I dismounted and lead Goliath by the reins closer to the cave. "Did the Moon Wing agree to deliver the letter?"

  "She did. We will receive a bird if a response is given." Pulling my hood off, I then pat Goliath's neck. "I am exhausted and hungry. Who's making dinner?" Squirrel looked right at the monk with raised eyebrows, practically assigning the man the job.

  What had happened between those two while I was gone?

#In the Wolf's Den #cursed #cursed 2020 #the weeping monk #cursed weeping monk #lancelot #cursed lancelot #oc x canon #orange #minors dni #Wolf does fanfic

[journalofsorts2]

i was thinking about this just now, i think my communication issues stem from my dad (my mom too but i'm focusing on my dad rn cause it's more fresh in my brain). but every time i actually like open up about something that's bothering me it goes one of three ways with him. 1. is he turns it back on me with some backhanded comment about how the problem he's creating is actually caused by a problem i'm creating for him, this one's most common when i tell him about something that he did to upset me (which i rarely do nowadays). 2. is he goes on some long winded spiel about something that has nothing to do with my problem and ultimately makes me shut up because i just want the conversation to be over with and it makes me feel like opening up was pointless. and 3. is it turns into an argument and i feel worse than i did before. but i feel like the backhanded comment one happens the most because i'll try and tell him something that he's doing that's causing me stress in some way but i'll try to mention it subtly because if i tell him 'hey i want to talk about an issue i'm having with you' then it's guaranteed to turn into a fight with him yelling at me (despite the fact that i try my hardest to keep my voice level and i've told him numerous times about his yelling and my ptsd, but hey me crying because the overwhelming stress of trying to communicate with him wears me down makes him feel like i'm manipulating him so it's totally okay for him to yell, he's not in the wrong don't worry.) but like tonight he was like 'oh are you cleaning up your cat's trash?' (it was lighthearted and she likes to tear up cardboard) and i was like 'no actually i was plugging my ears cause the sound of *sister* taking out the trash is too loud for me and then you turn up your duolingo to out-do that sound and it's a little much' and then he was like 'well actually i turn it up because you two are right here fighting (he likes to say we're fighting a lot but we really don't and we've explained that to him numerous times) and i'm trying to actually listen to my lesson' and it's like jesus christ i'm sorry i brought it up at all, like sorry i tried opening up a little about my problems. when i broke down sobbing one time to him because the noises downstairs were too much he was like 'well why don't you just ask me to wear headphones? and i'm trying to fix my allergies sorry' (he has a really bad problem with heavy breathing and allergies and it really overwhelms me sometimes but like ik he can't help it, just like i can't either) but he basically came at me with a 'why didn't you tell me sooner' attitude when actually i did tell him like a year prior and his response was yelling at me to the point where i had a panic attack and then he continued yelling at me until he realized what was happening and provided as little support as possible. but like every time i've opened up to him about an issue i have with him lately that i discussed with him before he has a completely different attitude. and maybe it's because i've been better about keeping my cool, i've been better about not crying while trying to get my point across, maybe it's because pushing down my emotions has only gotten easier over the years, and so i don't start crying when i talk to him and so he doesn't see me as my mom, he doesn't see me using tears as a weapon of manipulation, cause she does that, and it's valid for him to have a bit of trauma with that because she's an abusive person. what's not valid is for him to take that anger he has with her out on me. that's not okay and i know that. and so just like he has to walk on eggshells to talk about serious stuff with her, i have to walk on eggshells to talk about serious stuff with him. idk to summarize this rant, he has problems communicating and that's made me more capable of withholding my true feelings about something when they aren't exclusively positive. okay rant over

#journalofsorts rants

[ikpopwriting]

What experiences have you had with spirits?

I saw glowing red eyes in my grandmother’s neighbor’s back yard the day she passed. They never were able to say what exactly she died from but she had left a few voicemails for her kids that were disturbing and didn’t make sense. I always thought maybe something scared her to death.

*blinks*

Well, I have had nothing close to that….and thank God above I haven’t—how are you okay?? Does your grandmother still live there?? Do you visit????

I really only have a few experiences that I remember enough to tell, really. Nothing that really scared me longer than a moment or made me feel unsafe.

The earliest one was from a long time ago—and also the first. My mom was in a flurry of anxious rage because my brother had an appointment and didn’t get off the bus when he was supposed to even though she had reminded him numerous times the night before and morning of. Anyway, I closed and locked the door behind them, took my shoes off right there, and went to my room. Like 2 minutes later I heard the door slam and thought maybe they had forgotten something so I called out. No response. Went to check and no one was in the house. The door was still locked, and no car was in the drive. They wouldn’t have been able to leave that quick but I chalked it up to my imagination. Then I noticed my shoes that I had taken off right at the door and planned to pick up later was moved—exactly like if someone had opened the door all the way. I asked mom later if she had come back after they first left and she said no. So yea.

I had one experience at a friend’s house. They lived up in the mountain forests, and we were in her room I think cleaning? Or looking for something? Anyway, she threw something over her shoulder and it ended up hitting the bedside table where she had a glass of water. We heard it clatter to the floor and she sighed and said she’d go get a mop or towels or something. She got up from where we were, turned, and walked towards the door. She stopped almost at it and said “what the hell?” And when I asked what, she told me to come look. The glass was sitting there on the floor straight up, not a drop spilled, like we had intentionally set it there. This was absolutely not possible, with how much clattering we heard when it fell and with how full the glass was. Nothing else was there that could have made the noises. I remember one of us saying “at least it’s a considerate ghost”. We never told anyone else about it back then.

The next one I remember was from high school I think. We had little things happen that we just shrugged off and jokingly said the ghost did, but nothing significant to remember. Anyway. It was the middle of the night, and I stumbled out of bed to the bathroom. When I went back to my room something was standing in the doorway; by which I mean a thick, vaguely humanoid shadow was in the threshold blocking out any light from inside my room. I stopped, blinked at it a couple times, and said something akin to “I’m too tired for this”. After a couple seconds it just faded away and I could see the light on the cable box across the room and the light peaking through the blinds from the neighbor’s nightlight again. I didn’t feel scared or threatened but honestly was so drop-dead tired it could have literally tried to stab me and I would have just sighed or blinked at it. I did remember it immediately when I woke up and said out loud “what the hell was that?”

A friend of my brother had a somewhat similar experience a few years earlier, but not in the pitch-dark middle of the night. It was back when we had a single desktop computer in the family room behind the couch, and we had two rolling office chairs there. My brother was playing something and his friend was waiting for his turn, when he turned to talk to mom and I. He had started to say something and froze, so I looked over and he was pale. He was looking down the hall on the other side of the family room. I said “what?” And he shook his head. He said “I just saw a fireman in that hall, in his fire suit.” I should note that my dad is a fireman and there was a recurring thing at one of the old stations where a fireman had died in his sleep there. They called him Boo, and no one knew where he came from. Story goes that he came in on a train, applied to be a fireman, and that was his life (this was back when the firefighters practically lived at the station all the time if they didn’t have families). Beds would shake like someone was pushing the foot, a bathroom light would come on randomly, and they heard footsteps. One time a guy was woke in the middle of the night by the foot of his bed being shook and said “alright Boo, cut it out!” and it stopped. My dad even had his own experiences and witnessed things. They ended up building a new station behind the old one and it’s now used for storage and as far as I know Boo hasn’t moved to the new one. So after this friend said it was a fireman in turnout gear I rolled my eyes and said “you told him about Boo, didn’t you?” But my brother hadn’t. We had never talked about it around him either. We told him the stories from the station and about the new station and he said “yeah, I think he followed your dad home instead of moving stations”. That was the only incident like that, so whether or not Boo had followed dad home, he’s not here anymore.

Another experience happened in a church late at night. Me and a couple friends were there, and as we passed a window on the second floor that looks down into the dinning hall/gym, me and one friend happened to glance down into the room and saw a figure. The thing is, we were supposed to be the only 3 people in the building. We both jumped at the same time and then stared at the room then each other before asking “you saw that right?” at the same time. The other friend said “I don’t wanna know” and we left after trying to figure out what had moved. It hadn’t been near any doors, and there was nothing to hide behind or anything, but we confirmed with each other that we thought we saw a man walking very fast for a brief moment before he disappeared.

Other small experiences is smelling men’s cologne randomly when my dad and brother don’t wear it, and no one else is around. My mom experiences this too. We don’t know who it could be, as it happed before the men in the family died since we moved to our current house, and they never wore it or stopped wearing it long before they died.

For years I have also heard a male voice call my name when I’m in my room, and the first few times I thought that my dad was home and go to see what he wants and there’s no grown male in the house at all. This has happened since we moved in, but I spend very little of my waking hours in my room anymore, what with having a dog and all.

I’ve also smelled my grandmother’s perfume in my grandfather’s house, but they separated long before I was born; back when mom was in her late teens so like the early 80s. She did live there, but I highly doubt that is where she would haunt or visit in the afterlife. He also had a business employing women in the house at one time, and he was quite the ladies man (and adulterer) back then. So who knows.

Also…and I’m not sure this counts…two years ago my grandfather died of COVID on Christmas. A couple days after the funeral, I had a dream. We (my family) were all hugging him one by one, saying goodbye. After he hugged me, my late great grandfather (my grandfather’s father-in-law) came up to me and said “don’t worry, I’ll take care of him”. I have pretty vivid dreams already, but this felt so different from normal dreams. I honestly believe it was a message from beyond this world; either from my late grandfather and great grandfather, or God. Maybe it was just something my mind created to comfort me, but it wouldn’t be the first time a dream wasn’t just a dream.

That’s all the “ghost” or whatever experiences I’ve had that I can think of at the moment.

#jess talks #jess answers #anon ask #anonymous #anonymous ask #anon #paranormal #ghost

[servin-up-surveys]

survey #058

Who’s the last person you were angry with? Myself, really. What was the last video game that you beat? Girt and I beat Stray the other day. Fantastic game, but I wish the ending was more... fulfilling and not as abrupt, too. When was the last time you ate Pop Tarts? It's been a long time; we try to not buy those because they're just empty calories. I'm never full after eating a pair. Have you ever hyperventilated? Yes. Do you like peaches? I like sliced/canned peaches, yeah.

Have you ever had lice? No. Colored or black-and-white photo? It very much depends on the composition of the photo. Do you believe in astrology? Not at all. Who did you last give a piggyback ride to? Oh jeez, I have absolutely no idea, at all. I avoid getting on the floor at like all costs, ha ha. Do you like Lady Gaga or does she try too hard? I actually think she's a very talented artist and an icon of individuality. Her music generally isn't for me, BUT that doesn't mean I can't acknowledge when someone has talent that can appeal to certain audiences. What’s the ugliest trend you’ve ever seen? Why are Crocs in????????? Would you ever keep your favorite animal as a pet? ABSOLUTELY not. Meerkats being legal pets in certain countries absolutely infuriates me because it is so, so unfair and unhealthy for them. What would you do if you were stuck on a boat in the middle of the ocean? To be totally honest, I think I'd drown myself to save myself all the panicking and starvation/dehydration. I mean I'm not going to be found and there is NO way I could survive, so. When was the last time you played Guitar Hero? It's been years; the last time I did was before we even moved here. One of these days that's something Girt and I should play, though. Where did you last wear a bathing suit? The local YMCA. Who did your last notification come from? Girt in Discord. Do you feel more comfortable with a male or female doctor/nurse? I am WAY more comfortable with female doctors. Ever cried so much you threw up? No, but I've gotten close; I've started gagging before. Are you completely over your last relationship? Very much so. Have you ever gone to a beach? Yeah, numerous times. Have you ever suspected anyone of cheating on you? No. What do you usually order on a pizza? Most of the time I just go with pepperoni. Have you ever done volunteer work just because you wanted to? Yes. The last time you washed your hair, did you use conditioner? I never do, no. Would you ever visit a psychic? No, because they're bullshit, and I don't support people who make a living off of manipulating others. Have you ever had a stick insect as a pet? No. Those are cool, though. Has anyone ever called you stuck-up? No; I'm like the very opposite so I can't imagine someone calling me that. Had sex at school? No, that's one thing I would never do. [TW: ABUSE] Abusive relationship: leave him/her or keep it a secret? I am gone SO fucking fast. What recently happened that made you proud of yourself? This is... extremely sad to the point I really don't even want to share, but I instead of Mom cleaned Roman's litterbox. It used to be my responsibility and it still is honestly, but Mom started to do it instead because of JUST how poorly my body handles bending like that. My body's just so fucking weak. Ma even told me she was proud of me for doing it, if that says anything. It should be something so fucking easy, but not for me. [TW: DRUG OD] Ever have a drug overdose? What did you OD on exactly? Yes; once accidentally on a prescription idr the name of, and then once deliberately on I want to say Alka-Seltzer Plus. Are both of your blood parents still in your life? I don't see my dad a lot, but yes. Have you ever made out on a couch? Yeah. Someone asked you what you wanted, what would you say? An income. To name just one thing. When’s the next time you’ll be drinking? No idea. I'm on some meds that don't mix well with alcohol in the system so I generally don't nowadays. What are you doing on Halloween? Girt and I are gonna play the Resident Evil 2 remake w/ the lights off and everything. :'') I'm gonna see if he wants to maybe make those adorable Pillsbury ghost and pumpkin cookies and paint a pumpkin too, maybe. Have you ever been drunk at school or work? No. Do you own any Sims games? Which ones? I have the original animals one as well as the African animals edition. What are you listening to at the moment? I'm checking out "Immortal" by Ozzy. His new album just came out and I'm going through it! :') First letter of the names of everyone you have kissed? J, T, S, G. If you could take back saying anything to anyone, what would it be? In a letter to Jason, I had the fucking audacity to write that no one could possibly love him like I did. If Hell was real, I deserve to go there solely for that. Absolutely fucking vile. I feel disgusting just talking about it now. I was so fucking deranged. Do you do anything regularly that could damage your body? I drink way too fucking much soda and I hate it. When were you the saddest in your life? After my breakup with Jason. I very much wanted to be dead but was just afraid to do it. If you have siblings, have they moved out or do they still live with you? I'm the only one still living with Mom. Have you been outside today? Nope. Did you know you wanted to be in a relationship with the person you are now when you first met him/her? Ngl I started crushing on Girt fast, ha ha. Then Jason swooped in and I moved on. Pretty fuckin funny though, now Girt's the one that saved me from thinking I could only properly love Jason. Would you rather live in Alaska or New Zealand? I would literally fucking LOVE to live in Alaska if it wasn't so far from my family. Is there anyone in your life that knows right away something’s wrong with you? My mom, usually. If someone said to you “nice ass,” you say? Honestly I'd probably just flip them off without even looking at them. What would you do if you walked into your house only to find your boyfriend and your mother making out? I'd literally vomit. And move the hell out. What if you found out your partner had a previous sex change? I'd be surprised, but with my sexuality, I wouldn't care. Have you ever dated someone in the military? No, I wouldn't be able to stomach that. When’s the next time you’ll have to buy a gift for someone? Girt's birthday is next month and I WANT to get him something, but I don't know if I'll be able to with the whole "no income" thing... and I have no gifted cash left. List the last ten people that texted you. Mom, Nicole, Ash, Dad, Miss Tobey, Mazzy, Katie, Tez, and Kenesa are the only ones in my inbox rn. Tell me a random fact about each person. Mom has been swimming with manatees, Nicole is a magician dealing with kids, Ashley was nearly an actress in a television show when she did some modeling stuff, Dad's favorite band is Van Halen, Miss Tobey is my former physical science teacher and now our landlord, Mazzy has worked with FUCKING WOLVES, Katie is a brilliant cake decorator, Tez is a SUCCESSFUL ARTIST, and Kenesa is my hairdresser. What colour is your favourite eye shadow? Black is the way to go. What’s your favourite hairstyle on a guy? ......................... the emo swoop FUCK Who was the last person to call you beautiful? Girt. <3 Who was the last person of the opposite sex to Facebook message you? Girt, before we swapped to chatting mostly on Discord. Do you know how to make origami? Nope. Who is your hero? My mom and Markiplier. Steve Irwin, too. How would you like to be proposed to one day? Bro, what's the fun in picking that out myself? I wanna be surprised. When was the last time you saw your brother? It's been a few years. :/ I really wanna see him again, especially with him having a new son. Do you like candy corn? No, imo it's disgusting. Favorite Halloween candy? Those Reese's pumpkins, probs. Do you usually eat breakfast? Pretty much always. Favorite dipping sauce for chicken strips? Ehhh ketchup or honey mustard, it depends on what I'm up for. Do you like chocolate and mint together? Omg yes, definitely. favorite flavor of gum? Watermelon, probably. what was your favorite food as a kid? Spaghetti. Least favorite soda? Is root beer considered a soda? If so, that. Not a fan. Do you like sweet or unsweet tea? Neither. Have you ever had chocolate-covered gummy bears? No, can't say I'm really interested. Pulp or no pulp orange juice? I absolutely WILL NOT drink orange juice that has pulp in it. Favorite burger condiments? All I'll ever really take is of course the usual ketchup and mustard, and a bit of mayonnaise is fine. Do you like peanut butter? I do, but I haven't been quite into it lately. Do you like cold pizza? Ye. Have you ever broken a bone? Yes, my wrist. Pretty sure my left one 'cuz I think I remember still being able to write? Are you interested in creative writing of any sort? My friend, I was writing stories as soon as I could write at all and have been regularly RPing since I was like 10. I LOVE creative writing. Would you introduce the last person you kissed to your parents? They already know each other. Is your ex a complete loser? I don't have the slightest idea where "the" ex is in his life, but I very much doubt he is. He was always ambitious and determined. I also have no ties with my most recent ex, but I don't consider her a "loser" at all, either. Regardless of the issues I hold with her, Sara is a very determined and resilient person that doesn't go down easy at all. Her persistence is pretty indisputably admirable, imo. What does the shirt you’re wearing look like? It's just a hot pink tank top. Do you like to cuddle? I love to cuddle with Girt. Is the last person of the opposite sex you texted single? No, he's married to my stepmother Kim. Would your parents disown you if you got pregnant? No; I'm an adult but even if I wasn't, my mother would fucking never do what her bitch of a mother did to her. Any baby names you think you might name your future kids? I have three already decided IF kids ever by some miracle happen: Alessandra Rose and/or Miquella Lynn and Damien Vance. Think back to your most important relationship, was it all your fault it’s over? Honestly? Yes, at least I think so. I can't exactly help that I was extremely mentally ill, but... still. Has anyone seen you naked in the last 6 months? Just my mom.

#survey #surveys #random questions #random surveys

[koitrash]

I like your voice p6

Sorry for how long it took to get out! I wanted Joel to be perfect bc i love him so much i rewrote this one so many times. There will probably b one more part after this maybe some smut idk tho. Also Ellie sings 'J's Lullaby' by Delaney Bailey bc i couldn't get it out of my head and i can totally hear her singing it to dina. I hope you guys enjoy <33

also whats up w the new moblie update this shit is so weird LMFAOO

Pairing: Ellie x fem reader

Warnings: The same as the game (??) cursing, mentions of minor character death, slight angst, Drinking, getting drunk, Fluff ;)

Word count: 3.6k

Your arms rested on the cold concrete ledge of the stone wall that spread miles around Jackson, peering down to the long drop below. Today you were finally back doing assignments again, starting with guard duty on the west gate, which was always really quiet. You saw Ellie for the first time in 2 weeks, leaving out with Dina for patrol this morning. That gash on your back handicapped you for a while, waiting for it to heal enough to do labor again. You chose to spend that time self loathing under your cozy blanket till Jesse came to yank you out of your funk. He knew the gist of what happened on that fateful patrol but not all the details. He invited you out tonight with Dina to try to get you out of the depression but wherever Dina goes Ellie follows and you couldn't stomach the thought of speaking to her again.

You were readjusting the snug fit of the rifle around your shoulder when you heard the guy next to you get relieved from duty, hoping your time to leave was also coming soon. The thing that caught your attention was the name muttered in the exchange. You glanced over to a larger man, replacing the former. He was older, had a clean cut beard and well kept hair, with eyes that sunk with age. His build gave off a strange overwhelming comfort. He nodded to you with a tight smile before settling into his spot, maybe a couple yards away.

"Hey uhh-" He started, obviously trying to grab your attention. "Did Ellie come through here earlier?" Your eyebrows furrowed at the question. Why was he asking about Ellie? Was she in trouble? What makes him think you even knew her?

"Yeah, this morning." You answered, deeming it none of your business. He only hummed in response before returning to look out at the landscape in front of you guys.

"She should be headed back soon." He said, seemingly to himself. Now curiosity scratched your brain more than you cared to admit.

"What's your name?" You spoke up, trying to sound as polite as possible.

"Joel."

Joel. That's right. Joel is- or was Ellie's guardian. She's talked about him a numerous amount of times to you, told you more stories than you could count about their adventures. The nostalgic gloss over her eyes and her soft smiles proved she cared about this man very much. She mentioned how they don't talk much anymore, signaling to you that something must have happened.

"Ellie has talked about you a lot." You smiled and he immediately perked up. "She showed me a couple of movies you liked."

"Yeah," He smiled to himself as he glanced down to a... broken watch? "You're Y/n right?" You nodded in confirmation.

"She's talked about you a couple of times too. Seems like she enjoys your company a lot." Joel continued and it was only then that you realized he had a thick country accent, his voice heavy as it was velvety. It suited him well honestly. Ellie said some words with a country accent, which you guessed she picked up from him since she said she was from Boston. You chewed on the inside of your lip thinking back to how long it's been since you heard her sweet, soothing voice. You missed it. It was like every word she spoke was dipped in delicious mellow honey that smoothed the ridges in your brain, leveling out your anxious thoughts. God- you missed her.

"Did she show you that song yet?"

"What song?" Your eyebrows pushed together, interest peaked.

He stared at you blankly, eyes screaming that he might have said something he shouldn't have. "She asked me about some cords to a new song she was learning... maybe I mixed it up." A short laugh escaping his lips before he rested against the railing. Mixed what up, you still didn't have a clue.

"I haven't talked to her in a couple of weeks. I got injured on our last patrol together."

"She hasn't come to see you?"

"Nah," You scoffed. "I don't think we were close like that."

"Doesn't sound like Ellie. That girl, you gotta watch out for her."

You forced out a tight laugh, extremely confused on what Joel was talking about.

"She's been hurt a lot in the past. I can tell she really likes you but patrols can be tricky. She can be overly protective and stubborn." Joel squinted at seemingly nothing, almost like he's speaking on a memory.

"That makes two of us." You scoffed choosing to dig your feet into the small patch of rocks pushed to the ledge, feeling miserable at the recollection from patrol. "I don't think we got along very well."

"Don't worry about it too much." He stood high, now moving close to you. A strong hand laid on your shoulder, bringing you instant comfort. Joel smelled like wood and leather and you’d be lying if you said it didn’t ooze of fatherliness. "The way she talked about you makes me think she sees you as something more than a stubborn patrol partner."

But you knew that already. You already knew the girl was in love with you, and you were falling hard for her. The real problem was how you were going to handle it.

"I don't think I can be anything more than a stubborn patrol partner to her." You held down the lump threatening to burst in your throat. You didn't know why being next to Joel was making you so vulnerable but a voice screamed in your head to trust him with your life.

"You keep thinking like that and you'll never see you the way she does." His voice was soft, gentle, and caring. Your hands trembled as you turned to him, feeling like you'd erupt into tears like a volcano, because he was right. This silly, fucked up rule system you had was only ruining your happiness. It was destroying your chance at loving the one thing you cared most about. He offered you a soft smile before removing his hand, pivoting to head back to his original spot.

"Heard there's a bonfire tonight," Joel started.

"Jesse invited me." You said softly, not really sure if you wanted him to hear you.

"Ellie talked about going. Try speaking to her." He finished, not acknowledging your past sentence. Before you could protest, a tall stuffy man was standing near you, hinting that your time was up. You nodded as you adjusted your rifle again, moving past the man swiftly. You slowed when you were passing Joel, not exactly sure what to say. He turned to look at you when your brain drew a blank, settling on giving him a soft smile with a nod, hoping he'd understand your thanks.

Jesse waved you down from across the lawn. The moon hung high in the sky as you gazed around the lot, scoping out the field filled with bodies. Some were sitting on logs, huddled around a large fire. Others were snuggled up in pairs, scattered around the yard, to which earned an eye roll from you. They all laughed and chatted idly with each other, all engaging in their own conversations. The bonfire was in the middle of the woods, surrounded by tall trees, wrapped in Christmas lights, that gave you some sense of comfort.

Jesse was sitting cradling a cup on a thick fallen tree , spread at least 20 feet long, sitting around 10 other people. You expected to see Dina accompanying him but she was nowhere in sight.

“How you feeling champ?’ Jesse smiled, standing to give you a hug.

“A little tired, Guard duty is so boring.” You answered, sighing into the taller man's shoulders.

“I missed you man! How's your back healing?’ He gave you one more soft squeeze before letting you go and seating himself back on the log. You guessed the ‘I missed you’ comment was about seeing you in society again since he did visit your messy shell of a house some days ago.

“ It’s alright. Doesn't hurt much anymore, sometimes if I sleep on it wrong.” you smiled, sitting next to him. It was nice being back out in the world around people your age again. “Wheres Dina?’

He answered only with a nod and a jerk of his thumb to somewhere behind you. Pausing, you already heard Dinas roaring laugh, sending an all knowing smile to Jesse before turning around. You couldn't help the smile that curled your face as you saw Dina throw her head back from laughing so hard. She was dancing with Ellie, and it made your heart tighten. She looked so beautiful under the soft, warm glow from the fire. It was like a picture painted in your head. Ellies head turned to the side, probably from embarrassment, exposing her slender neck. She smiled shyly and her face flushed. Now the only thing that filled your mind was placing a million soft kisses on it.

Dina turned back to you and Jesse's direction as her face lit up more than it already was, Ellie’s gaze also following. Dina’s hands fell from her shoulders as she pulled away now making her way to Jesse- or maybe you- oh god definitely you. Her arms swung open, gesturing you to stand for a hug, which you happily obliged to. She wrapped her arms around your shoulders, hair brushing your cheek as you leaned in.

“Y/n! I haven't seen you in forever! How are you? I heard you got hurt on the last patrol, are you okay?’ She shot out questions faster than you could answer as you pulled away.

“Yeah, I'm all good now! It wasn't that bad honestly.” You smiled at her, mind running wild thinking what all Ellie told her about the patrol. Speaking of Ellie, you glanced at her direction, seeing her looking back at you shy and awkward just like the first time you saw her. The smile slowly creeping onto your face was reflected by the girl in front of you. She moved quickly, wrapping her arms around you tightly. Your brain didn't even register the hug for a second, it was too busy trying to figure out if Ellie still liked you. Her familiar scent comforts your senses immediately.

“I'm glad you're okay, Y/n.” She breathed into the side of your head. Your mind all but screamed at you to tell her you never stopped thinking about her. Tell her you're sorry for the way you acted. Tell her you missed her so much. Tell her you wanted her to come see you.

“I am now.’ Was the only thing you could manage to say, melting in her hold. You could stay like this forever, forgetting the guilt that poked the back of your head as she held you like you were the only thing on earth, soft warm hands roaming your back. It was cut far too short as she pulled away to look at your face, like she hadn't seen it in years. Her beautiful green eyes flickered between yours, a soft smile playing on her lips. You couldn't help but to smile back, her face was so mesmerizing, you could literally stare at it all day.

“Ellie!” Dina called now sitting next to Jesse. “Where is your guitar? Jesse says he thinks I can't play.” She smirked.

“That's because I know you can't play.” He laughed next to her.

“It's over by the fire.” Ellie answered, stabbing her thumb back in that direction.

“You brought your guitar?” You asked, drawing her attention back to you.

“Yeah, I bring it to every bonfire.” Her hand rubbed at her neck.

“You gonna play something for me?” You teased, nudging her with your elbow.

“She's been learning a new song if I remember correctly.'' Dina brushed past, head turning to wiggle her brows at Ellie, whose face was flushed red.

“Oh! I met Joel!” You chirped, now remembering the conversation with him earlier.

“Really?”

“Yeah! He seems like a really sweet guy. First thing he said was ‘Ellie come through here?’” You faked a deep voice and country accent, trying to impersonate the man the best you could, earning yourself a laugh from Ellie.

“Yeah, he can be a bit… protective.” Her smile melted down to a mildly bothered look.

“He told me about a song you were learning.” You opted to change the subject as it creeped into territory you'd rather not cross.

“I guess I have to play it for you now, huh?’ Her smile returned as she joked, knowing your request before you said it. Your eyes widened, surprised she guessed your next words. A loud strum of strings grabbed your attention as Dina poorly tried to show her skills. You laughed at Jesse's pained face, downing whatever was in his cup. “Hey where are the drinks anyways?”

“Over here, come on.” Ellie answered brushing your wrist like she wanted to hold your hand before pushing forward. You followed her closely to a cooler filled with ice and beer. Your face twisted at the thought of drinking that disgusting alcohol.

Ellie chuckled. “ I'll take it you don't like beer.”

You shrugged, smirking at her. “Its my favorite”

“Sarcasm, we're getting somewhere.” She smiled at you before turning to a small white table with a half empty vodka on it. Shots were something you could get with. You grabbed the bottle as Ellie pushed two cups to you, pouring and taking one quickly. You coughed, throat burning in protest as Ellie downed the other cup. You eyed her, bottom lip catching slightly under your teeth, as you shot a finger up. “One more.” You laughed as she threw her head back, wanting to protest but you knew she would do it.

Three shots later and now she's chasing you around the fire as you waved one of her shoes above your head. How you got here was fuzzy. You just remembered trying to help her out and tie her shoe before the impulsive drunk thoughts won, telling you to snatch it right off her foot and run for your life. Your lungs crushed as your legs took you as fast as they could, laughing uncontrollably. Ellie yelled a string of curses chasing behind, laughing as hard as you were. You slowed to gasp for air when she crashed into you, sending you both tumbling to the soft grass below. Her hands were immediately on you as she apologized profusely asking you if you were okay. You sat up quickly, world spinning around you, eyes wide and senses numb, you turned to Ellie. She was crouched next to you, must have got up quickly from the fall but you couldn't tell because time wasn't a thing in your drunken state.

“Are you okay?” She looked deeply concerned as her eyes roamed you for any injuries, a hand steady on your knee. The fall happened so fast and you honestly couldn't feel anything except for how hot you were. You cracked out a laugh for no real reason.

“I can't feel shit Ellie!” Throwing your head back, you laughed until she slowly joined in. When you finally opened your eyes again she was damn near on top of you. Jerking back quickly, she lost her grip falling on top of your bent legs. It wasn't until you saw her arm stretched out in reach of your hand still holding her shoe that you were tossed into a laughing fit again.

“Did you think I let my guard down!?”

“Gimme the damn shoe!” She reached again, now sending you flying back as you held the shoe above your head. Her leg flew over yours quickly as she now straddled you, pinning you to the ground. You laughed till you couldn't breathe any more, arms flailing around desperately trying to keep the shoe away from her. You let out a high pitched squeal when her fingered grazed your stomach, wiggling wildly. There's no way she resorted to tickling. Your arms snapped to your sides as you tried to wiggle from under her. She snatched her shoe out of your hold as you screamed ‘Mercy’ but that didn't stop her. She continued to tickle you, now moving to your neck, under your arms, to your stomach, to even sticking a finger in your ear. You both laughed till your lungs gave out, gasping for air like there was no more left in the world.

She finally stopped, rolling off of you to lay by your side, chest rising and falling quickly as her mouth dropped and eyes closed, trying to collect as much air in her lungs as she could. All you could do was watch her like she was a piece in a museum. Her smile stayed as she turned to you, giving you that ‘you're the only person on the planet’ stare that made your heart flutter. Her eyes flickered to your smile, then back to your eyes, then your hair, then neck, hand moving to brush yours that laid beside hers. You pushed to your side, resting on your elbow as your other hand met her face. Her fingers immediately moved to rest on top of yours, now cupping her cheek. Then your lips met hers and the world around you stopped moving. Fireworks went off in your head, sparks flying in the background. The kiss was soft, gentle, reassuring.

You pulled away first, wanting to see her pretty face. Her brows pushed together slightly as she looked into your eyes for an answer. “But-” She stuttered out breathless and barely over a whisper.

“You wanna show me that song now?” You smiled down at her, and she slowly returned it, cheeks now turning a pretty shade of pink

Ellie sat with her guitar loosely on her lap, fingers grazing the strings. You knew she was somewhat drunk, you were even drunker. Your butt was cold as it sat on the hard ground, but she looked so beautiful as you gazed up at her. You guys were sat away from everyone else, in your own little world where everything was sparkling, Ellie was the light of your life, and nothing else mattered.

“I'm a bit drunk so I can't do much.” She smiled down lazily at you. Her fingers dragged down the strings and she cursed softly. “Wait, hang on.” She smiled and readjusted her fingers again, but you didn't hear anything wrong before, everything she did was music to your ears.

‘Darling, Id wait for you, even if you didn't ask me to.”

You'd be lying if you said her singing didn't snatch the air right out your lungs. She looked down at you so gently, with love in her eyes as she continued.

‘Tie a lasso around the moon, and bring it on down to you. Id bottle the feeling you give me. Shelve that stuff for years to come”

She coughed awkwardly and glanced at you, guitar relaxing in her hold.

“Thats all I’m doing since I’m drunk and I dont want to fuck it up anymore.” She laughed and her hand flew to the back of her neck. God this woman was so amazing it actually brought tears to your eyes. Her voice was so mesmerizing not to mention how beautiful the words were.

“Woah, are you crying? What's wrong!?” Ellie all but threw the guitar from her lap to move closer to you, hand moving to cup your face.

“I'm so sorry Ellie.” You cried, moving to wipe your tears, streaming down your cheeks. “Im sorry I was being so stupid on that patrol, you were just treating me like some child and I wanted to prove myself to you. I was being reckless and stupid and this is all so confusing because I like you so much but what if you die! I would give you the fucking world so please dont die- I cant handle it-” You exploded, words slurring together through the tears, shoulders sagging as she wrapped her arms around you. “You're like the most amazing human being I've ever met, Ellie, I like you so much- but you haven't talked to me since the patrol and I thought you hated me!”

“What? Y/n I could never hate you! Im like fucking in love with you- did you not listen to the song?”

“The song was so beautiful!” You threw your head back melodramatically as you continued to cry, which earned a chuckle from Ellie.

“Y/n look at me,” Her smile remained as she cupped your cheeks, forcing you to look at her sincere face. “I haven't stopped thinking about you since I’ve met you. You're like the most beautiful person I've ever met,” She paused and you mentally noted that she was definitely drunk.

“I just said that.” You teased.

“I-” She sighed. “Shut up and listen. I want you in my life. I'm sorry I got so protective on the patrol. I just didn't want you to get hurt and that's exactly what happened and it scared me. I didn't come see you because I blamed myself. I couldn't stomach the thought of seeing you injured because of me.” Some of her words slurred together.

“You didn't make the floor cave in you idiot.”

“No, but I made you feel like you needed to prove yourself. I’m sorry Y/n.” She looked like she was on the verge of tears at the confession and the world around you spun so violently, painfully reminding you that you were very drunk. The voice in the back of your head screamed to leave. Memory of Joel reminding you to put yourself first. Images of your brother covered in blood, lying dead in front of you. Ellie’s hand on your face reassuring you. This was all too much and your stomach screeched at you to get to a trash can immediately.

“I think I'm gonna throw up.” Was all you could manage to say before lifting yourself to puke behind the log.

Teehee a lil cliff hanger again hehhehehe anyways I really hope i wrote Joel good i was so nervous i didn't wanna fuck it up anyways thank you for making it this far! Hopefully i can get started on a new fic or start taking requests if you guys want them :) <333

#ellie tlou #ellie williams #ellie williams x reader #ellie tlou2 #the last of us #the last of us x reader #tlou #tlou2 #tlou fanfic

[proserpina-magnus]

Hiiiiii could I request a Marauders x reader… platonic. Where they are just coaxing her through a bad day/migraine?

Hii! there isn't that much comforting other then them being clingy and sorta protective, but I still hope you like!!

The Marauders When You Have A Migraine

Word count; 1.8k

[ Warning: fem reader, doodles, eating, migraines/description of headaches, swearing, Sirius refers to you as “their baby” ]

Quick note, there’s a scene where the boys draw on the reader with a marker. I didn’t specify what colour the marker was, so depending on your skin colour you can interrupt the colour as you wish.

You slumped at the Gryffindor dining table, hair matted in a low messy hairstyle. You didn't even try and brush it out, you woke up and left it how it was. You couldn't even bring yourself to dress in new fresh clothing, you wore what you slept in.

Eyeing the breakfast options, you felt a pain tingle through your head. The nerves bunching and squeezing together to make it unbearable to concentrate.

" [ name ]! We have class in 15 minutes and you're not even dressed!" James bellowed from across the table, you pushed your shoes against the floor and slumped. Remus gave a confused look, his eyes narrowing as he glanced between Peter and Sirius.

"Come on, we have time to get some food in 'ya," Sirius declared, pushing toast onto your plate. The curly raven haired male even buttered your toast just the way you liked, even filling your glass with fresh squeezed orange juice.

"How 'ya feel-in?" Peter pronounced through mouthfuls of food, James swatting the blonds head in retaliation. "Wormy, don't speak with your mouth full,"

Sirius cackled from beside you, Peter stomped his foot onto Sirius in response. Sirius made a dramatic scene, falling towards the cold stone floor as he held his foot with forced shaky breaths. "My foot! My foot! I've been assaulted!" He whined, rolling from side to side.

Remus lets out a loud sigh from beside you, your head buzzing from the noise of ongoing chatter. You could hear James laugh loudly, like he always does. Usually his laugh was contagious, but it was incredibly annoying at the moment. Along with snickers and loud whines, you gripped your cup and brought it to your lips. Peter swallowed, reaching for another pancake as he watched you take long sips.

" ya never answered my question," Peter rambled before taking a gracious bite. You shrugged, Sirius sliding back into his seat. The boys all looked towards you, your fork picking at the blueberries Sirius pushed onto your plate moments prior.

"Another headache?" James asked, cleaning his pants from crumbs as he pushed his finished plate aside. You nodded briefly, a plain expression adorned on your features. Another hot buzz dangled in your mind, your forehead throbbing along with it.

"Maybe we should take you to madam Pomfry, you shouldn't be getting them this often," Remus responded. Sirius made a pouting face, before he took you into his arms.

"Our baby is hurt!" Sirius exaggerated loudly, causing staring eyes to look towards the group of friends. You flushed a bit, embarrassed by Sirius nature. You pushed him away, going back to picking at your food.

"I ain't nobody's baby," you said while pushing Sirius further away, James and Peter sniggered as Sirius made puppy dog eyes. You rolled your eyes, a bit grumpy from the constant throbbing.

"Bloody hell, it fucking hurts. It's not even bad, it's just the constant throbbing is pissing me off," you complained, shoving the piece of toast in your mouth. You watched as students finished eating, occasionally leaving for their first class of the day.

The boys all exchanged looks, Remus placing a hand on your back to give it a gentle rub. You push your plate back, your arms coming on the table as you rest in them.

As more students leave, professor Mcgonagall makes her way over to your rambunctious group. She softens at the scene, seeing the four boys rub your shoulder or arms to try and give their sympathy.

You sigh as you hear her shoes click with the ground, professor Mcgonagall stands a few inches away from you all. She clears her throat, all eyes directing towards her except for you.

"Class is about to start... is there a problem with miss [ last name ]?" The older woman asked, trying to mask her worry. Remus had explained earlier to her that you had been having numerous migraines.

"She's having another headache Minnie, our baby is dying!" Sirius exclaimed, Remus reaching over to swat him away from you with an annoyed look plastered on his face. Even though you couldn't see Sirius, you laughed as you thought about his whining face.

Professor Mcgonagall clasped her tongue, about to tell off Sirius for the nickname he'd given her. But instead, she placed her attention on you.

"I'll take her to the infirmary, surely madam Pomfrey has a potion to help," she explained, the boys all standing together in the same motion. You still kept your head pressed into your forehead.

"Can we go with her?" James whispered, hoping that they could be with you. They all hated when you were in pain, it felt like they had to protect you. You were their bestfriend, they surely couldn't let a thing ever bug you unless it was them.

"I'm sorry Potter, but you have class," Professor McGonagall frowned, the boys were about to protest to stay with you. But Minnie quickly shut them down, her hand raising as all the boys shut their jaws closed.

"It's alright, I'll see you later," you told them, raising with a throb as you walked with them all towards the doors. You parted way painfully, Sirius almost crying as he clung onto your leg. The rest of the boys watched, even James tearing up. He took his round spectacles off, dabbing his eyes with a spare cloth he had in his pocket.

"You can't be serious," you retorted at them, an annoyed look on your face as Minnie checked her watch with frowned eyes.

"Well... technically," Sirius began, but he couldn't finish his sentence as you kicked him off of you. You were upset, tired, and in pain. As much as you loved them, they were too much sometimes.

"Just go, I'll see you later," you tried to cover up your annoyed state, but the boys picked up on it. Sirius straightened up, fixing his shirt as they left with their heads down casted towards the ground.

"Idiots they are," you told Professor McGonagall, she only laughed and led you towards the infirmary.

—-

After a few missed classes, it was finally lunch. All the boys scrambled to the dining hall, shoving foods on plates. They ignored the stares, jogging up to the infirmary where you slept.

With the creak of the door, Sirius and James peaked inside. They saw no one, only a lump on the farthest bed. They all skipped over to you with slow whispers, trying to make sure you won’t wake up. Sirius pushed the blanket of your face, all of them relieved to see you still asleep.

“Prongs, do you have a spare marker on you?” Sirius asked, a growing smirk on his face. James put down the plate on a nearby table, fishing through his pockets to try and find a marker.

“Pads, no,” Remus said sternly, knowing what the raven haired male would do. Peter looked between the three boys, a bit unsure of what Sirius was going to do. The blonde boy put his plate near James, picking up half a sandwich as he sat near your feet.

“Pads yes,” Sirius smiled widely, James passing him the thick inked marker. Remus rolled his eyes, not stopping Sirius from his antics. Sirius crawled on the bed, an evil smile on his features as he unclasped the marker. He wrote “baby” with big thick letters on your forehead, giggling when you twitched and tried to swat his hand away in your sleeping state.

“Give me the marker,” James whispers, not waiting for Sirius to pass him it as he snatched it for himself. The bispecticle male drew 4 happy stick figures and a rat on your cheek, his tongue poked out in concentration.

“Why am I the only one in my amingi form?” Peter asked, frowning as James passed him the marker. He began to draw a small smiley face in your open palm, writing a messy “Peter was here” on your arm.

“Because, there wasn’t enough room and plus, you’re cuter in rat form,” James teased, but his words sounded very sweet so Peter took it as a compliment. Sirius and Remus cackled loudly, making you stir awake. Your eyes fluttered open, looking around between the boys above you.

“Uh… hello?” You greeted, stretching slightly as you looked around the empty room. Sirius pushed Peter and James away from the bed, sprawling his limbs out to hog you from their affection.

“Hi!” They all chanted at once, Remus moving closer as he pushed at Sirius to make room. The tall male sat down, rummaging through his bag for a minute before pulling out a chocolate bar.

“Eat,” Remus said, even opening the wrapper for you. He broke off a piece, swatting Sirius's wandering hand when he tried to take a piece for himself. You sat up on the bed, unaware of the markings on your skin. You chewed the gooey chocolate, resting against the bed frame with a satisfied hum.

“Did you bring me food?” You asked, a smile on your face as you realized all the plates. The boys nodded, bringing the plates over for you all to feast upon.

“What’s so funny?” You asked when Sirius started to laugh, James also chuckling. You irked slightly, touching over your face to try and see if there were crumbs. This made the boys laugh harder, making you feel embarrassed as you choke out a “what? Is there something on my face?”

You notice the little doodle Peter left you, realizing what had happened. You pushed Sirius's head, making him bump into James. You laughed at the scene, both boys rubbing their forehead with a pouty face.

“Does it come off?” You asked Remus, a sigh on your lips as you ran off towards the bathroom.

“Nope,” he called out, a small smile on his face. You looked in the mirror, seeing the obvious doodles drawn by your boys. You knew exactly who the culprit was for the big letters written on your forehead.

“Sirius! What the hell is this?” You called, stomping back to the bed where they all sat. Sirius raises his hands, pointing to James and Peter. “It’s not just me! They did it as well!”

“You bitch,” James gasped, a hand on his heart as he held a dramatic glint in his eyes. Peter dropped his head, muttering his apologies. All the boys start to bicker at Sirius, calling him a tattletale. You smile and lean back against the bed, bringing a biscuit to your mouth as you watch the quarrel unfold, this was definitely the entertainment you needed on this shitty day.

#marauders fandom #marauder x you #marauders x reader #young marauders #marauders fluff #marauders fic #the marauders era #james potter blurb #marauders blurb #sirius black #remus lupin #peter pettigrew #young sirius black #young remus lupin #young peter pettigrew #sirius black x fem!reader #remus lupin x reader fluff #sirius black x reader #young peter pettigrew x you #james potter x you #young sirius black x reader #young remus lupin x reader #mama mcgonagall #madam pomfrey

[freddie-weaselbee]

Someone Blue//F.W.

Pairing: Fred Weasley x Fem!Reader 

Warnings: Slight language, angst, a lot of confusion, fluffy ending

Summary: Fred spots a familiar face at his brother’s wedding, and has a sinking suspicion about why she’s acting so upset during this time of celebration. 

Prompts: Enemies to Lovers (kind of) and Weddings with the dialogue prompts “you look like you need a hug” and “did you need something?”

Word Count: 3.2k

A/N: Day 1 of @theweasleyslut‘s 2k writing challenge 

Angelina looked absolutely ethereal, skin glowing in the shimmering lights as she glided across the grass as if it was a ballroom floor. Her white dress was slightly stained, mostly from when her now husband tackled her to the ground after their first kiss as a married couple, and yet it only made her seem all the more angelic. 

George’s feet seemed to never touch the ground. He was moving at record speeds, prancing and hopping and skipping around the dance floor, dragging his wife along with him. It was the most joyful Fred had ever seen him. 

Not when they left Hogwarts, not when they opened their shop, not even when Angelina said yes to the proposal could have compared to the happiness on George’s face. Nor Angelina’s. They were in a pure state of bliss. 

The rest of the wedding-goers seemed to match their energy. Fred couldn’t go anywhere without being bombarded with drunken laughs and horrid dancing, and the occasional congratulations or two from some tipsy guests who didn’t know that the man they were talking to wasn’t the groom. 

All in all, it was an amazing night. The field behind the burrow had become a traditional wedding venue for the growing Weasley children, so far hosting Bill, Percy, Ron, and now George’s days to remember. The tents and lights were all set up as they were with Bill and Fleur’s wedding, except this time there was no risk of Death Eaters ruining the event. Hopefully. 

However, while making his way around to talk to (and flirt with) the guests, Fred happened to notice one person who did not fit the overzealous tone. Well, he didn’t really happen to notice. Rather he’d been staring at her throughout the entire night, watching her somber mood break through her happy façade. Not that he’d ever admit that to anyone. 

You were standing by yourself, but you weren’t secluded from the action. Rather, you were right in the middle of things, on the very edge of the dance floor, staring out at the masses of bodies swinging their partners around. Your arms were crossed over your chest, a defensive position that Fred had seen so many times in you before. 

He turned away and tried to ignore it. It wasn’t any of his business if you were upset. The two of you were barely even friends anymore. You had cut him out of your life so many years ago and never looked back. To this day, Fred still didn’t know why, and it killed him. 

He wanted to walk away. To go the other direction toward a beautiful guest wearing a flowing red dress, hair done up perfectly. The stranger would be the smart choice. A fun way to spend the evening, dancing around and snogging under moonlit trees. But, against his better judgement, Fred’s heart wouldn't let him leave. 

Sighing, Fred lifted his feet and made his way in the other direction, to the girl who couldn’t care less about him. 

You stood unmoving, except for a subtle sway to the music. People brushed by you, but you paid them no mind. You were too focused on something else. As Fred drew nearer, he was able to follow your line of sight to the people in question. The newlyweds. 

Fred bristled before softening slightly. Of course. This must be about George. Back at Hogwarts, Fred was positive you had the biggest crush on his brother. You were always tagging along with their jokes, even when they got you into huge trouble. You definitely spent more time alone with George than Fred, sharing whispers and stares at the expense of the older twin. He could never get George to break and tell him what you two talked about. George even took you to the Yule Ball in your 6th year. You had never looked as radiant as you did that night, except for maybe this moment. Fred wished he had asked you to dance at the ball, but he never worked up the courage to. He didn’t want you to internally grimace at the thought of dancing with the “lesser” Weasley twin when George was right there. 

In his recollection of memories, Fred hadn’t noticed how close he had gotten to you, and how you were no longer gazing at the couple dancing. You were now staring at him. 

“Did you need something?”

Fred was shaken out of his imagination, met with an annoyed glare but soft smile coming from you. His surprise was immediately replaced with his signature cocky grin, leaning his hand onto one of the wedding tables while keeping his gaze on you. Unfortunately, his hand accidentally dipped into a wine glass, but he quickly pulled it out and hoped you didn’t notice. You did. 

“Well, that’s not a very nice way to greet one of your oldest friends, now is it?” Fred wiped his wine-covered hand on his suit pants and slipped it into his pocket, pretending to be unbothered by his previous mistake. 

You turned your eyes away from him, once again gluing them to the dance floor. “I think it’s fitting, seeing as how you were creepily staring at me for about 5 minutes before I said something.”

Fred’s ears grew pink at the accusation. “I, umm, I didn’t realize it was that long. Or that you noticed. Sorry.” He bashfully rubbed the back of his neck, pretending to glance around at other guests who might interest him more. 

“You still haven’t answered me.”

Fred cocked his head to the side in question. 

“Why’d you come over here? Was there something you needed?”

“Ah, yes well,” Fred began smoothly, “I saw this darling beauty from across the tent and I just could not take my eyes off of her--”

“Fred,” you interrupted. You were looking at him again, your gaze piercing through him, forcing him to tell you the truth, to tell you everything about him. His fears, his hopes and dreams, what he had for breakfast this morning. He wanted to tell you it all. 

“The truth, please.”

Clearing his throat, and his mind of whatever thoughts just plagued him, Fred decided to be honest. You deserved that much. 

“You look like you need a hug,” he said, shrugging nonchalantly. 

Evidently, those were not the words you were expecting to hear. You were prepared with about a dozen quips to say in response to whatever cocky joke Fred was about to make. But he didn’t, and nothing could have prepared you for what he did say. 

“I--I need a what?”

“Sorry, have you lost your hearing or was I not loud enough? It’s definitely not the second; you’ve told me on numerous occasions that I have the biggest mouth of anyone you know.”

There it was. But it still made you giggle, relaxing and gravitating closer to your companion. 

“I heard you,” you said, “just wasn’t expecting that from you, I guess.”

Fred took a half step closer, visibly glad when you didn’t move away. “Wasn’t expecting me to have noticed your behavior, or wasn’t expecting me to care if I did?”

It took you a few seconds to respond. “Both.”

He let out a sound of understanding before you both averted your eyes, looking straight ahead. Occasionally, Fred would try to look at you using his peripheral vision, and you would do the same. It became a kind of game--just an awkward back and forth between two people who used to be so close, and were now so far apart.

You game ended when one of the wedding guests decided to clink their glass, beginning a chorus of high pitched chimes to echo throughout the room. You watched as George turned to find Angelina, running to her to give her a kiss so full of love and passion that it took everything Fred had not to shout out a joke and ruin the moment. He could do that next time. 

He noticed you stiffen at the kiss, presumably because it was just another reminder of what you couldn’t have. George. 

“You know, I always wanted to be a Weasley.”

Fred was surprised that you had spoken to him, and even more surprised about the turn the conversation had taken. 

“I grew up with you guys,” you continued, not waiting for Fred to respond. “Molly was like my second mother, even though she always liked Hermione and Harry a bit more than me.”

“Join the club,” said Fred, causing you to laugh loudly, a sound he hadn’t heard from you in ages. Godric, how he had missed it.

“It’s just…” you trailed off, not knowing if you wanted to be open with Fred, someone you hadn’t spoken to in years. Chances were, you wouldn’t keep in touch much after the wedding, so you might as well. What was there to lose? “It’s just...seeing Angelina, one of my best friends, dance around, wearing that ring, getting to be an actual Weasley. It’s...it’s making me a wee bit jealous.”

Fred watched you fidget with a bracelet on your wrist and decided to push his luck just a bit more. “And you’re wishing that it could be you wearing the ring, married to a certain Weasley gentleman?”

The shock was evident in your expression. “No, no, it’s not--I mean I never…” Sighing, you decided to come clean. “Yeah, I’ve maybe been harboring feelings for a certain twin for, oh I don’t know, my entire life. No biggie though, it’s totally fine that he never asked me out.”

The ginger beside you threw an arm around your shoulder, handing you a glass of wine in the process. “Drink. It makes everything better.”

You glared at him, but took the glass anyways, chugging it down in a few large gulps. “Another, please,” you demanded, and Fred obliged. 

You started to ease into Fred’s side, as soft and comforting as you remembered it to be, before realizing exactly what it was you were doing. “Fred, can I ask you something?”

“‘Course. You can ask me anything.” The absolute last thing Fred wanted to be doing at the moment was talking about your undying love for his twin brother, at his wedding no less, but he didn’t want to leave you alone. Not seeing you for so long had had a harsher effect on him than he thought, and he didn’t want to leave your side. 

Taking a deep breath and gathering your courage, you asked him the question that had been plaguing your mind for years. The one that ate you from the inside out and kept you tossing and turning at night. The reason you had to separate yourself from your love in the first place. “Why am I not good enough?”

Your voice broke a tiny bit, but a lot less than you had been expecting. A tear did happen to slip out, and Fred quickly wiped it away, his fingertip resting on your cheek for a moment too long. 

“Y/N, love, come here.” Fred pulled you into that hug he had talked about earlier, holding you closely to his chest. If he thought you were going to appreciate the gesture, he was wrong. You pushed him away softly, refusing to let any more tears fall. 

“I’m serious, Fred. W-Why am I not good enough? I’ve made it clear for years and yet...nothing. And not even a simple rejection. I could’ve handled that, y’know. If I got a simple no, I could’ve handled it and moved on. But I never did, and it’s killing me. Why am I not good enough?”

It killed Fred to see you this upset, and it hurt him even more to see that the anger was directed at him and not at George. It was his brother that broke your heart after all, not him. “You are good enough!” Fred said, with enough truth and force that a little part of you believed it. “You’re, you’re too good! You’ve been by our side from the beginning and haven’t left it since. Well, we haven’t seen you in years, but that’s probably because of--”

You nodded, confirming what he thought. Your heartbreak had driven you away. 

“But other than that,” he continued, “you’ve been like my third arm. Any guy would be crazy to give you up, you know that?”

 A tiny smile grew on your face, but was gone as soon as it had arrived. “The timing...the timing was just all wrong, wasn’t it?” you asked. 

Fred nodded, watching his brother and his wife greet guests and take pictures that were sure to be on the mantle in the burrow as soon as the wedding was over. “Yeah, I guess so. The prick should’ve asked you out sooner.”

“Oh I agree wholeheartedly, he is a prick,” you said, poking his arm, a gesture that slightly confused him. “So, I’m guessing there’s no chance of anything happening now? No sliver of hope that maybe this could work out?”

He hated that he would be the one to crush your dreams, but he couldn’t let you keep living in false hope. “Well,” he said, “the wedding bands are on and they both said ‘I do.’ Kind of hard to come back from that. I’m sorry.”

You froze, now more befuddled than you had been all night. “I...what?”

Before Fred could say anything you reached to grab his left hand, checking his ring finger for something you knew wasn’t there, but you had to be sure. 

“Wedding bands? What in the world do you--” Realization hit you like a brick, and you wanted to slap yourself. Or Fred. Either one. But preferably the latter. 

“Frederick, my dear love, who do you think we have been talking about this whole time?” you asked, voice genuine but also teasing. 

Fred didn’t know what you all of a sudden found so amusing, but he was already doubting himself and he didn’t want you to make fun of him for whatever he had done wrong. 

“Umm, well you said a Weasley, and then you said a Weasley twin. So I thought the answer was obvious.”

“Say it,” you demanded. “Who have we been talking about? Who am I in love with after years of unrequited feelings?”

He felt like he was walking into a trap, but he couldn’t figure out what it was. He hesitated for a few seconds before your searing gaze forced him to answer. “George. We’re talking about my brother George.”

No sooner had his words left his mouth than your hand came up to slap his head. “You idiot! Are you serious right now?”

Fred stood flabbergasted, racking his brain for who else you could have been talking about. George was a Weasley twin. You said you were in love with a Weasley twin. Who else was there?

“It’s you, you big oaf!”

Oh. OH! There were two Weasley twins, and he was one of them. Which meant…

“You’re in love with me?!”

By this point, heads were turned to watch the scene and people were not-so-subtly whispering to their partners. 

You dragged a still surprised Fred through the crowd and out of the tents, finding a secluded enough area where you could talk. 

Fred’s brain had still not been caught up. “It’s me? You’re in love with me? But, but what about George?”

You furrowed your brow, wondering how Fred could have so easily mistaken your feelings for him as those for another. “What about George?”

“You’re in love with him!”

“I most definitely am not!”

“The Yule Ball!” he spat out. “You went to the Yule Ball with him when we were 16!”

“Yes,” you said calmly, “and you went with Angelina, but I don’t see you two getting married. We went as friends and I talked to him about you the entire night. In fact, most of the time when we hung out I was talking about you. Made him swear not to tell though. I was never good about expressing my feelings.”

Fred put a hand to his head, a growing throb threatening to overtake his senses. “But why were you so sad tonight? You wanted to marry George!”

“No,” you said patiently. “I was sad because Angelina and George’s relationship worked out the way I was wishing one between you and I had. They fell in love during school, dated a few years later, and now she’s a part of your family. I wasn’t wishing it was just me out there with your brother. I was wishing that it was our wedding.”

You blushed heavily and buried your face in your hands, embarrassed by your bluntness about your feelings. “Oh, Godric, I shouldn’t have said that, now it’s more awkward. I, umm, I should probably get going.”

Fred grabbed your wrist before you could leave, pulling you into his chest. His eyes were wide, mouth hanging slightly ajar as he gazed down at your muddled expression. 

“It’s me. I’m the one you love.”

He said it as more of a declaration rather than a question, but you could tell that he needed confirmation. 

“Of course, Freddie,” you said. “It’s always been you.”

His hand wasted no time in going to the back of your head, pulling your face into his and melding your lips together in your first kiss with Fred Weasley. After the shock wore off, you were hastily kissing him back, hoping against all hope that he wouldn’t pull back and proclaim what a stupid mistake this all was. But he never did. You kissed and kissed and kissed until you were the one who had to pull back in order to catch your breath. 

It took you both a few seconds to realize what had just happened, and for the first time you both were at a loss for words. “That was, umm…” you mumbled, trying to think of what to say. 

“I love you too.”

Fred’s words were rushed out of his mouth, voice deep ragged. “I mean, when you said it was me, not George, that you loved. I, well, I love you too. Always have. Guess I just thought that you had a thing for George and I had no chance. Pretty silly of me, huh?”

“Downright stupid of you,” you replied, giggling as he pushed you away with a bashful smile gracing his lips. 

“So,” he said quietly, inching closer to you once again, “is there a chance of anything happening now?” Fred repeated the words you had said earlier, making you smile wider than you had all night. 

“Depends,” you said. “Are you gonna get the courage to ask me out?”

Fred waited for a moment before answering. “How about,” he said, offering his arm out for you to link with yours, “we have that dance we never got at the Yule Ball. And then that date we never got after, and then that relationship we never got as well. Oh! And then that wedding, and then a dog, maybe a few kids, a big house in the country--”

“Woahhh, slow down buddy, you haven’t ever properly asked me!”

You took his arm and made your way back to where the music continued to blare and festivities raged on. 

“Y/N, love, may I have this dance?”

You pushed a strand of hair from his face, ruffling it up a little to give it that signature Fred Weasley style. 

“Of course, Freddie. And every dance after that.”

Tag List:

@famdomhideout @amourtentiaa

#theweasleyslut's 2k writing challenge #fredweasleyimagine #fredweasley #fred #fred x reader #fred weasley x reader #fredweasleyfluff #wedding #enemies to lovers

[lazypeachsoul]

I wouldn't want to spend a minute lovin' anybody else.

Warnings: this fic has some sad moments and mentions of the blip. also kind of AU because I'm completely ignoring Natasha's canon end.

Word count: 4,2k (i got very carried away with this fic)

Summary: · Meeting the right person at the wrong time can be life changing when it doesn’t work out the way we desire. But if it's meant to be it will always happen, right?

A/N: This is my fic for the "Women of Marvel xReader Exchange" created by @marvelxreaderfanfictionfest . It was created for @im-holding-ontoyou and I hope you like it! gif by @natasharomanovgifs 🌼 ALSO; i haven't watched Black Widow yet so I'm sorry if something in this fic doesn't fit the new info we got about natasha.

Masterlist.

To be added to my taglist use this forms or write me an ask!

New York, 2015.

When you received the call from one of your bosses that you had a new case you would have never imagined how big that case would turn out to be.

You had been working for one of the most important law firms in New York for a year now, and you were getting kind of used to reading cases that would be narrated in the papers for months. Rich and entitled men, big divorces were they fight over who gets the yacht, one or two murder cases... if it revolved around the powerful people of New York city, your firm would get it.

When you got to the debriefing and were told that Tony Stark, one of the firm's most important clients, asked your team for assistance in the creation of some legislation with the newly created “Advanced Threat Containment Unit” you were more than surprised.

The events that the Avengers had caused (or saved us from, there were different opinions going around) in the small country of Sokovia were known all around the and it was only time before the most powerful officials asked for the regulation of ‘superhero activity’.

You weren’t important enough to actually attend the meetings that took place with the government, seeing as you had only passed your bar exam a little over a year prior, but you were deemed cheerful and nice enough to act as a nexus between the firm and the client.

For months you spent your days talking to Tony Stark and other members of The Avengers trying to explain what was being talked about. The first few meetings were a disaster, seeing as the mood was somber for the lives lost and nobody really understood your legal jargon. But slowly you started to transform your language and really tried to make the meetings as easy as possible for everyone present.

But who were you kidding, they really didn’t care about the meetings or the silly attorney being sent to explain something that was way above their paycheck. Well, at least Stark was gracious enough to set a coffee station with some pastries for the meeting. You were pouring the hot liquid into your to-go cup when your hand jerked and the hot liquid splashed your hand.

You could feel the sting of the burn but avoided further sudden movements trying not to make it worse. Before you could reach for a napkin to clean up the mess you made, a more dexterous and manicured hand reached for them and exchanged the hot cup in your hand for the bunch of papers.

“Careful, Stark always serves boiling coffee. I think it’s to mask that it’s not the best quality.”

You lifted your gaze from your hand and found a pair of deep green eyes gazing back. You would have thought that spending numerous meetings in the company of superheroes would make you less susceptible to their powerful auras, but being this close to Natasha Romanoff made your heart beat a bit faster.

“Yeah, I found out the hard way.” You joked, lifting your hand a bit. “You would guess one of the richest people in the world would actually serve good coffee...”

Seeing her crack a smile made you feel less tense. Sometimes you forget they are still normal people. Normal people who could kill you with their bare hands and had superhuman powers. She placed your cup on the food table, apparently not bothered by how hot it must have been, and pushed her hand in your direction.

“I’m Natasha Romanoff.” You wrapped your hand around hers and shook it, biting your tongue trying not to tell her of course you knew her name. “Sorry I didn’t introduce myself in earlier meetings, we were all trying to come to terms with what had happened.”

“No worries, I can only imagine how hard it must have been for all of you.” You nodded and tried to show her sympathy, trying to avoid thinking about all the lives affected by the fight. “Oh sorry, I’m-”

Natasha quickly cut you off, speaking your name before you could even say it. You could feel your cheeks get warmer at the idea that they actually knew who you were, and she probably could sense your mood change because she quickly explained.

“I know who you are, you send us at least two emails a week about these meetings and FRIDAY always announces you before you arrive.”

“Who announces me?” You asked curiously at the mention of a name you recognized.

“FRIDAY. It’s the name of Stark’s AI technology. It works all around the tower and it’s there to make life easier for everyone.” She explained pointing around at the speakers strategically placed around the room.

“Oh, I get emails from Friday sometimes. Most of them are asking me to translate or explain something about the debriefing because Mr.Stark is not interested in legal terms.” Both you and Natasha laughed at the thought.

But she quickly recomposed and tried to look serious again when she heard her teammates coming in to get ready for the meeting.

“I wanted to ask you about that. Do you think we could schedule a meeting so that you could explain some things about the legislation of the A.T.C.U.?” She spoke lower than she had when the two of you were alone and you wondered why she didn’t want her colleagues to know about the meeting.

“Ye-Yeah, of course I can.” You were confused but thought it would be in your best interest, and the firm’s, to say yes to the proposal. And a meeting with a very attractive and definitely interesting woman was not something that happened constantly for you.

“Great, thank you.” She smiled warmly and squeezed your hand that you hadn’t even realized was still wrapped around hers from the introduction. “I can promise you better coffee.”

You could only hum in response, still trying to piece together what she might want from the meeting. But your thoughts were quickly cut off when Stark entered the room and you moved to start the reunion.

During the entire meeting you could feel the dull pain in your hand from the scorching coffee and the feeling of a pair of green eyes watching your every move.

Vienna, 2016.

The situation had only gone downhill from the Battle of Sokovia. The public’s opinion on the Avengers was at an all-time-low and that made terrorist groups bold. They knew that if they struck and caused enough chaos, the blame would fall on the good guys that tried to stop them.

The only thing that seemed to be a stable thing in your life was Natasha. Well, as stable as dating a superhero might be. She was busy a lot, but you understood the importance of her job and you were quite busy too gaining importance within the law firm.

And even if sometimes terrorists and criminals got in the way you still found a moment to spend together, wrapped around each other without having to think about how messed up life was.

You thought Lagos was the blow that would make everything tumble, the Sokovia accords were unveiled and it broke the Avengers, and your girlfriend. You could feel how torn she was at her decision of some of her friends to oppose the signing and go on the run, and her own decision to subordinate to the United Nations mandate. But you realized how small that had been when king T’Chaka was killed at the UN.

You had been at the UN as part of the USA legal team that participated in the writing and monitoring of the accords. Your participation in the negotiations almost broke your relationship but you were able to recover once you explained your position and Natasha actually came to an understanding of it.

Natasha was also in Vienna when everything went down, you hadn’t managed to properly see her because she was one of the signers and they sat at the assembly while other guests sat at the amphitheater watching the retransmission.

You hadn’t been able to properly see her all day, seeing as she took a detour before flying to Austria. You were only able to communicate through texts where you tried to make the situation more comfortable for her and she promised a peaceful european trip to celebrate the signing.

When the bomb went off and all hell broke loose the first thing you tried to do was look for her, she was at the epicenter of the explosion and you just wanted to see if she was okay. You saw her from afar when you were being pushed to the outside of the building while they swiped the perimeter.

She sat with T’Challa before he jumped from the bench and stomped away. Natasha looked around and your gazes crossed, immediately melting away some of the worry. You tried to push your way through the crowd to get to her, but police and security didn’t budge.

You never took your eyes off of her, scared that if you did she would disappear. But she did move her gaze to her phone and the look that crossed her face when she heard the voice at the other side told you it was a very important call.

Once the call was over and she looked at you again you knew that would probably be the last time you would see her in some time. You hadn’t known Natasha as long as some of her colleagues had, but you could proudly say you could understand what she wanted to say with just a look. And the look on her face in that moment read close to a goodbye.

New York, 2018.

It had been two years since the fall of Helmut Zemo and part of the Avengers was still on the run. And it maybe wouldn’t have had that big of an impact on you if it wasn’t because Natasha had also been on the run for that long.

You had heard about what happened at the Leipzig airport and how Natasha had changed alliances to join Captain America’s fight. You had been heartbroken at the news knowing that any resemblance of normality that you still hope for was destroyed.

You had spent months wondering what had made her change her mind. Had she thought about your conversations about the accords? Had she even remembered you, waiting for her back in New York, when she decided to go on the run?

A part of you tried to convince you of how selfish thinking about that was, why would she think about you when the future of her team and friends was at stake? But also you were her girlfriend, she should have thought about the implications that might have had for you.

In those years you had mourned your relationship and after the grieving period you tried to rebuild your life. New friends, a new position and new chances to take. And it went okay...at least until someone opened their mouth to talk about superheroes or The Avengers. Years down the line and it was still on people’s minds.

On special occasions you would receive anonymous gifts at your office or your apartment. The first birthday after the war you sobbed for fifteen minutes when you saw the bunch of flowers. There was no name or indicative of who might have sent them, that was until you looked better at the card and saw the small red hourglass painted in the corner.

The gifts continued. Every case you won, promotion, birthday or holiday a bunch of flowers would be delivered to you with the same note.

In a way it gave you a sense of peace knowing she was okay and still thought of you. But the more you thought about it the angrier you got at how she had left you.

You didn’t expect a message from your boss to run to the Avengers compound and assess some situation between Coronel Rhodes and Thaddeus Ross. Although the team had crumbled, your company was still hired to legally represent the remaining members and moderate situations that might arise with the government.

You entered the compound expecting another bureaucratic complaint about their activity but you found a trickier situation. The meeting room was filled with people you thought you would never see again.

Captain Rogers was sitting on one of the chairs sporting a new look that made you almost not recognize him and a tense demeanor. Next to him was Sam Wilson, looking around at the smallest of movements and trying to assess the situation. Wanda Maximoff was standing on the furthest corner of the room playing with her rings, meanwhile Vision was apparently being checked out for a wound. What kind of wounds a synthezoid could get was beyond your understanding.

“Thank you for coming so quickly, I might have angered Secretary Ross during a meeting.” Rhodey came up to you with a nervous smile.

You had gotten closer to him thanks to your job seeing as he was the one doing the dirty superhero work.

“Yeah, I got that much from the text. Nothing new then.” You tried to joke to diffuse the tension in the room. “It would have been nice to know you had guests though.”

“We are not guests. Last time I checked this was our home too.”

That voice made your blood freeze. You should have expected her there, all her friends had returned and the chance of her being back too was almost 100%. But hearing her voice again after two years was not something you expected.

You bit your tongue before you could talk about how it’s not a home if you abandon it, but decided against it. This was a fight between them, not Natasha and you.

“I need you to work with the government to avoid this situation becoming a disaster.” Rhodey explained and you scoffed.

“Rhodey, I’m a lawyer not a politician. I have as much power in this as you might have.” You tried to lay your point across but it was difficult with all eyes on the interaction. “Hell, I have even less power than you do.”

“Then I need you to distract them enough to get them off our shoulders.” He pressed. “Something big is coming and we need all the strength we can get.”

You thought about it for a moment. If it was true that something big was coming, the Avengers were the best option to fight it.

“I’m in.” You scoffed at his smile and sat down in one of the chairs of the meeting room. “I’m not ready for the world to end yet.”

The meeting went on for a while. You called bosses, government officials and everyone that would listen to your distractions. You sent emails that would flood their inboxes for days so that they couldn’t read any news that might reach them about what the superheroes had in mind.

It was late at night when a cup of steaming liquid was placed next to you. You looked at it and saw that it was some kind of herbal tea, probably made to relax the drinker. You followed the hand that was still holding the mug until you reached Natasha’s face.

You had done your best to ignore her looming presence in the room but now there was no distraction. Looking at her you could see tiredness in her face. She was platinum blonde now, a look that weirdly suited her, but her face still looked as welcoming to you as it always did.

You tried to stop the flashbacks to the last time you saw it in person in Vienna, but they kept replaying in your head until her voice broke you out of the loop.

“I thought you might need it, I remember how nervous calls used to make you.”

She was smiling but you could tell it didn’t reach her eyes.

“Yeah, I guess I got over it since I got my promotion. Now I spend a long portion of my day making calls.”

She hummed and sat down next two you, but leaving a chair in between you as a safe space.

“I read about it in an article, I sent you flowers to celebrate.”

“I got them. And the Christmas ones. On my birthday too.” You enumerated the times you had gotten the plants in the past two years. “You must have spent an awful amount of money buying me so many flowers.”

“You deserved it, you still do.” She shrugged and that’s when you noticed she had her own mug of warm tea in her other hand. “I’m sorry I couldn’t be there to celebrate with you.”

You laughed into your mug sarcastically. Out of everything you expected her to say this wasn’t one of them.

“Did you really? Because you didn’t seem to consider me much when you went on the run for two years.”

Natasha paled when she heard your tone. She probably wasn’t used to situations like these but you weren’t going to let her go without an apology at least.

“I was trying to do the best for-”

“-for the world. I get it, Natasha, I do.” You tried to contain your emotions but it was getting harder with every word. “Relationships are supposed to be teamwork. I know you are always too busy playing heroes and I never judged you for that, I just wish you would have trusted me enough to tell me before you disappeared.”

She was silent and knowing Natasha it’s because she was probably overwhelmed with the display of feelings. But she needed to hear how bad you had felt.

After minutes of waiting for an answer from her and getting nothing but sighs you shook your head and looked back at the computer screen.

“I guess it was a case of the right person, wrong time.” You shrugged trying to find distraction in the flurry of letters in your email inbox. “Or at least it was for me.”

She got up from her seat without a word and you grew exasperated. Why had she even approached you if then she wasn’t willing to have an adult, two sided conversation? She was almost at the door when you heard her voice again.

“Please never doubt how much I love you. I made some bad choices but dating you was not one of them.”

New York, 2024.

Time apparently flies by when you are erased from the face of the earth. One day you are in your office working late and the next you appear five years in the future with no recollection of what might have happened.

You were taken by authorities to impromptu camps and one by one examined to check your identities. The entire thing seemed to be something out of one of the dystopian novels you used to read as a teenager.

When it was your turn you gave them all the information you had on what had happened. You had given them your name and personal information and apparently had been a very searched person because the computer started beeping as soon as your name was introduced in the database.

You were moved to a secluded part of the camp and kept in an isolated room for god knows how long. Your stomach was in knots during the entire situation and you could feel the cold sweat on you. That mixed with the metallic taste on your tongue you knew this time your anxiety was justified. You were almost dizzy because of how hard you were thinking about the entire situation and trying to make sense of it.

When you heard the door of the room open you jumped up, discarding on the floor a makeshift blanket that had been placed on your shoulders when you got there. Your legs almost gave out at the movement and your heart felt like it was going to burst out.

The door opened enough for you to see who had been searching for you. Natasha stepped through the door still dressed in her tactic gear and with tiredness written all over her face. But that feeling seemed to almost disappear when she finally saw you.

With quick movements she stepped into the room and wrapped her arms around you tightly. For some reason that action was the trigger that you needed to let all your emotions consume you.

You started sobbing uncontrollably at the unknown. You didn’t understand what happened or how you are here, but feeling her embrace helped you feel safe in a way. It had been years since you last hugged her but it still felt as good as back in 2015.

You could hear Natasha’s soothing shushes in between your sobs and you moved to hold her tighter.

“You are here. I can’t believe I found you again.” She spoke softly and you didn’t know if she was speaking to you or herself. “It’s okay darling. I’m here and I’m not letting you go again. I promise.”

And with that promise a ray of hope made way between all the fear you felt.

Missouri, 2025.

Soft music could be heard all around the ground floor of the house. The soft beat was upbeat enough to get the morning started but not enough to be overwhelming if you had just woken up. You were sitting on the kitchen island looking at the news on your phone and having breakfast.

Mornings were usually very calm around the homestead and you couldn’ be more thankful for that. It allowed you to silently prepare your breakfast and coffee and get a headstart on Natasha’s breakfast too.

Since she had retired, Natasha had discovered a newfound love for sleeping in and you didn’t dare to take that away from her. She deserved it from all the work she had done in her life.

You, meanwhile, tried to get up early to scroll through the cases that you got in your new and smaller job and schedule meetings or emails.

It was a Saturday so work wasn’t a thing and you could actually enjoy your toast and coffee in peace. Or at least until a pair of arms wrapped themselves around your middle and pulled you back against Natasha.

“Good morning baby, how did you sleep?”

“Like a baby.” You could feel her smile when she kissed your cheek from behind. “You weren’t there when I woke up though.”

You shrugged before moving to get a bite out of your toast. Natasha tried to do the same but you quickly moved it away from her with a smile. She tried again and you moved as fast as your reflexes allowed you.

“C’mon baby, give me a bite” “No, it’s my toast. You can make your own.” “But it tastes better when you make it.” “No it doesn’t, don’t be lazy.”

The playful fight continued for a few moments until she got close enough to get a small bit but you moved it again.

“Don’t make me bite you, darling.”

You chuckled at her threat and plopped the remaining toast on the plate in front of you. Breakfast didn’t matter much anymore. You threw yourself into her arms and pressed your lips against hers. It wasn’t a slow and sensual kiss, it was closer to how small kids smooch their parents. But you knew it would convey your love more deeply.

“Don’t threaten me with a good time, Nat.” You spoke against her lips and squaked when you felt her playfully nip at your bottom lip.

“Is now a good time?”

That question had become recurring in your household, a nod to the phrase you said when you found eachother again after being separated the first time.

“I couldn’t think of a more perfect time.”

And you couldn’t. The rest of your life spent in a homestead with your girlfriend and whatever life might bring? It sounded absolutely delightful.

Taglist: @tagehaya @flyforeverfree @rooskaya-yelena @evalynanne @insanitybyanothername @princessayveke @yelenabelovasgf @kyli314

#natasha romanov x reader #natasha x reader #natasha x you #natasha romanoff imagine #natasha romanoff x reader #natasha romanoff x you #black widow imagine #marvel imagine #marvel fic #marvel x reader

[clouditae]

Cookies

Jimin x reader | 18+ | oneshot | neighbors au | smut | oral | roleplay | swearing

Word: 3.2k

You made cookies, and it’s only fair to share it with your neighbors

You wave goodbye to your elderly neighbor, her wrinkled smile making your smile grow. You're going to miss her the most. You wish you didn't have to move, but with your promotion and them relocating you, there isn't much of a choice. You love your little, cozy apartment, and if the commute isn't so far, you’d stay. You'll miss your neighbors too. Well, the ones you talk to and know well enough to invite over for dinner.

Looking down in your hands was the last bag of baked cookies. Letting out a breath, you quickly fix your hair and dress. The last person to receive your cookies is your neighbor Jimin. The neighbor that all young women and men know about. The neighbor everyone wants to fuck, and some got lucky enough to do so. You only know because he makes the girls scream, and it only makes you wish you were one of them.

You'd never do it. It would only make you feel like just another one of his... play things. Through the numerous glances and seductive talks he would give you, you thought it would be best to show him what he's missing. For not asking you out once you suppose. You walk up to his door, room 33 and knock. Suddenly you feel ridiculous for dressing up so much. You're just saying bye, thanks and hand him his cookies. Why go over the top?

The sound of the lock turning told you it’s too late to change your mind. The door opens to reveal Jimin with nothing but a towel wrapped around him. Your eyes can't help but wander from his black hair sticking to his forehead to his toned abs shining from the water drops that are sliding down and disappearing beyond the black towel. You really wish you can see what’s underneath.

"Can I help you, princess?" he asks, voice raspy and just...

You blink and meet his eyes. "I just wanted to give you these as a thank you and farewell." He looks down at the bag in your hands, a brow lifted. "I'm moving next week, so I just wanted to give these to you. If you're allergic or something—"

"You can leave them on my counter," he says, opening the door wider for you as he walks away.

"I'm sorry?"

"The kitchen is to the left." He points down a doorway as he continues down the hall. "I'm going to change real quick." Then he disappears, leaving you standing outside his entrance.

You didn't know what to do but thought it was best to do what he says rather than stand there like an idiot when he comes back. So, you enter the apartment, close the door behind you, and make your way down the hall and enter the kitchen. You couldn't help but gawk at how nice and clean his kitchen is. White walls, dark wood cabinets and a small table in the corner for two people. What if he was a chef? With all the high end appliances, he must be a great cook. Realizing you're admiring his kitchen and still holding the baked goods, you walk over to his counter and set the cookies down. Is this marble?

"So you're moving?" You jump at the sound of his voice. You turn around, mouth open to answer his question—where is his shirt? Where is his shirt? He's obviously doing this on purpose. He crosses his arms over his chest and leans against the doorway. "You're moving?"

You shake your head, eyes going up to where his are. "Yeah. I got a raise and I'm being relocated, so it's best to find an apartment closer to where I work." He hums in response but nothing more. You move to the side and point to his gift. "This is a thank you and farewell gift."

"Thank you," he repeats, his head cocking lightly to the side in what looks like confusion.

"Yeah. A thank you for helping me when it came to my groceries, my mail and a lot of other things you didn't need to help me with but did. So, thank you." You open the bag out of nervousness because you don't know what to do now. "Would you like to try one?" you ask him, holding the bag open but not grabbing one. He might not like you touching his food. You don't know. You're nervous.

Jimin pushes himself off the doorway and walks over to you. You forced your eyes to stay on his. You know that if you look down at his pajama pants, you could probably see his junk. You're not a pervert. Nope. He is standing very close to you as he grabs a cookie out from the bag. Wow, he smells nice. Like pinewood? You're not sure but you could smell this all day.

"So you came over to give me these," he begins, stepping closer to you and forcing you to step back, "wearing my favorite dress of yours." You're backed up against the counter, his body a few inches from yours. His mint breath was fanning your face. You couldn't meet his intense gaze as you decided to look at his neck.

There was one time you wore this dress and you met Jimin in the hallway. You suppose in his flirty tone he complimented your dress. You felt butterflies when he told you what he thought.

"I... I didn't know it was your favorite dress," you half lie. You knew he liked it because of the compliment, but you didn't know he'd act like this with you wearing it. Alone. In his apartment.

He hums again. "Turn around."

"What?" you mumble, looking up at him.

"Turn around," he commands, and you do. Never touching his body with your own. "This is my favorite dress because of the back." You feel his finger brush along your bare back. Your dress had an open in the back. Not big, but enough to see. "Do you know what this dress does to me?" He places his hands on the counter, trapping you between his arms.

"No," you whisper, heart racing. You gasp, suddenly feeling him against you, his lower region fully on your butt. You could swear you feel his half erect member.

"The first time I saw you wearing this I wanted to rip it off you," he rasps in your ear. "Let you know just how hard you make me." He grinds against you, his penis getting more and more erect.

You let in a shaky breath. "I-um"—you swallow, gripping the bag for dear life— "I have to meet my boyfriend soon."

"Your boyfriend?"

You nod. "I have a boyfriend."

"You want to leave?" You can only nod, voice wanting to betray you with a small moan. "You're not attracted to me." You shake your head in agreement. "Then why are you moving your hips?"

At his words, you realized that you were moving your hips. You were grinding against him just like he was doing to you. "I don't know," you lie, but you actually stop and so does he.

"Where's your phone?" he asks you.

"In my pocket." The reason you love this dress so much is because of the pockets it has. It's amazing.

You feel him dig in your pocket and pull out your phone, handing it to you. "Text him and tell him you won't be coming," he instructs as you take your phone.

Your eyes widen. "I can't do that."

"Up to you, princess. I'm in the mood, and the things I can do to you..." he trails off, his hands on your hips and lower until it reaches the end of your dress.

You're a mess. You don't know what to do. With Jimin sliding his hands up your thighs under your dress was not helping. His fingers leave a hot trail in his wake and all you wanted to do was feel more of him. Feel his hands roam your body and feel his member inside of you. You're horny and you want him. So, you send a text to your boyfriend.

"Good girl," he tells you, voice deep and silky. He places a hand on your upper back and pushes you forward, forcing you to lean on the counter. He pushes your dress up until it reaches the middle of your back. He chuckles and you realize you're wearing a thong. "Picking all my favorites today." His hands are on your ass, squeezing them before he slaps your butt. You jump a bit, the bag of cookies now out of your hands. He was now at the bands of your underwear, pulling it down until it fell on its own. "So this boyfriend of yours," he begins, his feet lightly kicking your own to spread your legs, "have you had sex with him yet?"

You think back, but find it hard when his fingers brush along your walls. "Y-yes." How much longer until you feel his fingers in you?

"Is he good?"

Was he? "Yes." It's been so long since the two of you had sex. Always busy. Never has time. He finally reaches your bud. "He always makes sure I'm the first to come. Sometimes it happens twice before he comes." You moan as his fingers move in a circular motion.

"Do you think I'm bigger than him?" he inquires, his other hand swiftly unbuttoning the first two buttons of your dress to cup your breast and play with it.

"I don't know," you breathe, swirling your hips to try and feel more. Much to your dismay, he removes his fingers from your womanhood and your breast.

You want to complain but he orders, "On your knees, sweetheart." You're hot and bothered but do as told. Turning around to face him, you get on your knees, looking up to meet him. He only nods at you and you knew what he wanted. You grab the band of his sweats, heart racing with excitement as you pull them down. His cock was a lot bigger than your boyfriend’s. You're beyond excited now as you grab his warm, throbbing tool, bringing your mouth closer to it.

You back up at him, staring at him with lust as you slowly lick the tip. He licks his own lips in anticipation. You give another lick but this time starting at the end of his base and make your way up like you're licking a lollipop. "C'mon baby," he whispers, his hand pushing back a few strands of hair away from your face before holding all of it in his hands. "Show me how badly you want me."

Oh you want him all right. Doing one more lick at his tip, you finally put as much of him as you can in your mouth. You push further before pulling back, making sure you hollow out your cheeks. This motion continues for a while, slow and then quick all while Jimin curses under his breath. It seems like he let you go at your pace for a while before he decided it wasn't enough. With your hair in his hand, he guides you. His breathing is going ragged and he's now thrusting into your mouth rougher and deeper to the point where your nose is touching his waist and your eyes are watery. After a few more deep thrusts you feel his warm fluid fill your mouth. He pulls out and you swallow, breathing heavily.

Jimin can only smirk, releasing your hair and helping you up to your feet. "Bedroom, princess." You leave his kitchen, walking down the hall and guessing where his room is. "Clothes off," he calls from the kitchen as you find his room.

You wish you could admire his room, but all you want to do is remove your clothes and lie readily for him to ravage you. You slip your heels off, unbuttoning your dress and tossing it on the floor. You forgot your underwear is on the kitchen floor. Climbing onto his bed, you remain on your knees, waiting impatiently for him to come in. When you are about to touch yourself to keep your high going, Jimin walks in. You watch him as he climbs onto the bed and lies on his back.

He taps his lips with his finger. "Sit." You're eager as you crawl over to him and bring one leg on the other side of his head. You couldn't help but look down at him with uncertainty. "Don't be shy, baby. I'll fuck your brains out later." You feel chills run down your spine before scooting forward until his face was no longer seen. You could feel his warm breath before his tongue brushed between your lips. Your body could only jerk a bit from how sensitive you already are.

He explores every inch of your warmth, sucking on your clit and flicking it with his tongue. You're moaning, pressing your forehead against the wall as you enjoy the feeling of his mouth. Your boyfriend never let you sit on your face, nor did he hold you from trying to move away as he ate you out. Jimin is doing everything right as he explores you and finds your special spot and works there for a while before you feel his hands on your waist and actually moves you forward and back. You follow his instructions moving front and back, front and back until you are moving on your own, hand pulling his hair as you're practically moving at the fastest pace you could. You're louder, head up and movement no longer at a certain pace. You see stars as you ride in and out of your orgasm.

He holds you there, taking in all that he could before letting you climb off. He grabs the towel from his bedside to wipe his face from all that didn't make it in his mouth. You couldn't help but look down to see that he was hard once again. You're nervous as to what's to come. He holds his hand out to you, nodding for you to take it. As you do he pulls you closer to him. Scooting closer to him, Jimin cups your cheeks and presses his lips to yours.

The kiss isn't needy or rough. Jimin is kissing you softly and sensually. His tongue brushes along your lower lip, asking for entrance. When you open your mouth, he explores, his tongue dancing with yours as his hands roam your body. One hand plays with your breasts while the other goes back to your lower region. You moan into his mouth, body sensitive and not ready for him, but you still want it. Your hand went to his member and began to stroke him, hoping he felt the same pleasure he was giving you.

He breaks the kiss. "You're pretty wet," he states, stroking your bud one last time. "I'm not wet enough." Catching on to what he means, you push yourself back just enough to lean down and take him in your mouth once again. You didn't lick him or tease him; you went straight for sucking him to the point where he was breathing heavy. He places his hand under your chin and taps your cheek as he says, "It's too early for me to come again." You sit up. "I want to actually fuck you first. Lie down." You lie on your back and watch him move between your legs and align his shaft. "I'm not going to be soft, love. I want to hear you." He pushes himself in and you gasp. He's big and is filling you in all the right places.

Once he's fully in he slowly brings himself out, and once he's almost at the tip, Jimin slams into you. From there he doesn't stop his pace. He grips your hips and thrusts into you with so much force. "Oh my—" you choke on a moan that escapes your lips. You grab onto the frame of the bed to try and keep you still, but that only forces the frame to bang against the wall.

"Come on. I want the neighbors to hear you scream," he grunts, thrusting even harder to earn a louder moan from you. "He's a dick who always steals random shit from me." Another moan. "I know you can be louder than that." Jimin pulls out, turning you on your stomach. He pushes himself back in and continues his rugged thrusts. He grabs your arms and pulls you up to him. He keeps one grip on your arm while the other goes to your neck, pulling your head back to rest on his shoulder. He whispers harshly in your ear, "The noises that are leaving your mouth are incredible."

You can feel that high, and it's coming quick. "I'm almost there," you choke, almost screaming in ecstasy when his hand holding your arm is now forming circular motions on our clit. "Please don't stop. Please."

He lets you go. You fall onto the mattress, his hand on your lower back keeping you pinned down while the other is gripping your waist again. "Come for me, baby. Scream. I want to hear you scream out your orgasm." The only thing you could hear was the sound of the sound of the headboard hitting the wall, the sound of your moans, and the faint skin slapping against one another. Then everything was silenced out by your screams from the orgasm you were having. "Fuck, you're tight," he rasps, thrusting no longer in a pace but all over the place as you feel his warm seed fill you. He continues his thrusts until he stops and slowly pulls out to collapse next to you. The two of you are breathing heavily as you turn on your back, staring up at his white ceiling.

"That was amazing," you tell him, chest heaving.

"Hell yeah it was. We should do that more often." From the corner of your eye, you see him shift a bit. He chuckles, earning your attention. He holds his phone out towards you. "Is this what you would have told your ex if we did this in the beginning?" You read the text you sent him.

[6:03 pm] Love: Sorry

You shrug. "I wasn't expecting you to start so early."

"You wore my favorite dress, and I saw you lower the v-line to show your cleavage. I couldn't help myself."

You raise an eyebrow. "You were looking through the peephole?"

"I was ready to fuck you when you asked to role play one of our encounters in the beginning. I wasn't expecting to see the baked cookies again," he laughs.

"Well after we started dating, you told me you loved the cookies and the dress was hot on me, so I had to do it for you," you answer.

"Well, hopefully we can still do it once we move into the new apartment," he sighs, running his hand through his hair. He glances at you. "Same time tomorrow?"

You chuckle, "Sure."

"Maybe we can do it in your apartment." You laugh even louder. "I'll bring the cookies."

#thebtswritersclub #bangtanuniversity #bangtanarmynet #btswritingcafe #btswritersguild #bts #bts x reader #bts x you #bts fanfic #bts au #bts smut #park jimin #jimin x reader #jimin x you #jimin fanfic #jimin au #jimin smut

[tommyparkerr]

Enough | Shawn Mendes x Reader

Alright y’all here’s one of my dusty old docs I happened to stumble across in my every-now-and-again clean up of Google Docs. Just as a disclaimer, I wrote this in 2018 so no one is allowed to judge me for this, okay? Okay. 

Words: 3.0k

Warnings: Panic/anxiety attack (though it’s presented differently than the majority I’ve seen), some angst, Shawn being stupid, crying

-Masterlist-

E N O U G H :

How’d studio go?

You were hesitant to send the text but did it anyway. You hoped for a positive response, but with the way things had been lately it was highly unlikely. Still, you so badly wanted to give Shawn the benefit of the doubt so you decided you would wait until his response proved you differently. After two hours had passed and he still hadn’t replied, however, you got your answer, and the benefit of the doubt quickly fizzled away. 

Shawn wasn’t one to just not answer you, but lately it’d been more and more reoccurring. It wasn’t that he didn’t care or that he was angry at you; it was that he cared too much and was angry at himself. You still remembered when Shawn called you after a studio day a while back, disappointed that he hadn’t managed to find any sort of inspiration. You didn’t know it then, but that was only the first of many uninspired days he’d be facing over the next several months. 

The boy hid it well—the self-hatred and frustration—but you saw things that others didn’t. You were the one who saw the dark rings under his eyes before he had the chance to cover them up. You were the one who spent countless nights with him on the phone, trying and failing to reassure him that it was all right he was feeling this way and that it happened to all writers at some point. You were the one who brought him coffee with an extra shot of espresso each morning because you knew if you didn’t he would fall asleep in the middle of warm-ups. 

Shawn was going to crash soon, and not in the metaphorical sense; he was going to mentally crash. In a way, he already had. But you had a feeling that these past months were going to catch up to him, the meaningless guitar strums and pointless piano chords adding up to be one too many, and he was going to crash. Hard. You just had to make sure you were there when he did. 

Lucky for you your apartment wasn’t too far from his, that way when he called and asked you to come over because he needed you (and vice-versa), you could be there in five minutes or less. It hadn’t been purposeful, the close addresses, but it worked out. And you were happy it did, as there’d been numerous times the short distance was used to your advantage in emergency situations—such as the time you made cookies and wanted to surprise Shawn with them while they were still hot. 

Your phone buzzed from the coffee table, startling you from your half-conscious state. You rubbed your eyes and your hand fumbled to pick up your phone. 

Same.

You sighed. Somehow you knew that while you’d been relaxing in your apartment watching cheesy movies and almost dozing off, Shawn had been sitting staring at blank sheets of music in an apartment that was entirely silent apart from the experimental chords he’d strum and immediately nix. 

Before you could even think, your fingers were making the appropriate movements to call Shawn. It rang a few times, the soft sound making your eyes droop again. 

“Hey, it’s Shawn!” 

Shawn’s voice snapped you awake and you shook your head at yourself, frustrated that you’d almost fallen asleep when he clearly needed someone to talk to. 

“Hey Shawn, you oka-“

“I’m busy right now, but leave a message and I’ll be sure to call you back.”

You blinked a couple times, the switch from your boyfriend's voice to the teller machine making you stumble. You quickly hung up before a voicemail could be recorded and tried calling again, but you only got the same result. 

There was no reason he shouldn’t be answering his phone when he’d texted you back only a minute ago. 

An unsettling feeling washed over you and you scrambled up from the couch to find your shoes and throw on your cardigan. It was below freezing outside but you didn’t care enough to spend the extra time finding a coat and warmer clothes; besides, it was a short walk to Shawn’s place. 

You called again. This time when the teller came on instructing you to leave a message after the beep, you did. 

“Hey bub, you’re really starting to worry me. I’ve been calling but you haven’t picked up, and I know you have me as an emergency contact; I know my calls are going through. So, I’m coming over. Right now, actually. Hang tight, okay? I’ll be there in a few.”

You were in such a rush that you hardly even noticed the cold. You were sure you’d feel it after you sorted everything out with Shawn, but until then it had no place in your mind. 

The receptionist didn’t question your presence in Shawn’s building, quite used to your late night visits, although she did look a bit concerned; you always made sure to bundle up this time of year and never went upstairs without flashing her a smile and quick hello, but now you did both, sprinting to the elevator and maneuvering the buttons to work as quick as possible. 

You didn’t bother knocking when you got to Shawn’s door, instead pulling out the key he’d given you months ago and using that to unlock it. At first you heard nothing when you stepped in, making you painfully aware of your racing heart. 

“Shawn?” you called out cautiously, not wanting to do anything that could possibly scare him off. You stepped further in to find the living room and kitchen clean as usual, but no Shawn. As you travelled further into the apartment your uneasiness grew stronger. “Shawn, where are-“

A mix between a shout and a groan came from the bedroom and you quickly sprinted to the area, finding that the sound had come from inside the closed—and locked—bathroom door. 

“Shawn, it’s Y/N. Please open the door, baby,” you said calmly, gently. 

“Get out!” he suddenly yelled after you’d made a couple more attempts. 

“I’m not leaving, Shawn-“

“Get out, Y/N!”

“Shawn,” you stated firmly, not being thrown off by his irrational anger. “Open the door.”

A loud bang sounded as Shawn slammed his fist against the door, making you jump. But your resolve still wasn’t weakening. 

“Leave me alone!”

“You do realize I’ll stay here all night, right?” you said truthfully. Even if he stayed angry the entire time you were here, you would much prefer it over silence. At least with anger you knew what he was doing; silence could mean anything. 

“I’ll call security!” he shouted. 

“With what phone?” you asked, having seen his supposed phone on the floor by his bed. Your point made him stumble for just a moment as you weren’t usually the type to fight fire with fire, but somehow you knew that tonight it might be the only way to get through to him. 

“You’re trespassing!” Shawn tried. 

Fire it was. 

“You mean on the property you gave me a key to and never asked for back?”

Shawn paused again—only for a second. “Can’t you live your own life for once instead of following me around like some lost puppy?” he jabbed. “I don’t need your help, Y/N!”

His words that were meant to extinguish the fire only fueled it, and before you could tell yourself to stop you raised your fist and banged hard against the door like he had—so hard that your hand ached. But it had gotten his attention; you could tell due to the sudden silence on the other side of the door. 

“Shawn,” you said, speaking quieter but still with unwavering tenacity. “I’m not leaving.”

The next few minutes were silent yet deafening. Just as you were about to open your mouth and say something else, a resounding shatter filled the air. You instinctively flinched and felt your heart drop when you realized what had happened.

Shawn had broken the mirror. 

You snapped into action, grabbing a pair of socks and shoes from Shawn’s closet then knocking on the bathroom door again, hoping beyond hope that that was the peak of his episode and it was all downhill from here. 

“Baby, please open the door.”

You breathed a quiet sigh of relief when you heard an answering click and carefully pushed the door open, taking in the sight of glass fragments scattered amongst the floor with Shawn right in the middle of it, looking unphased and too caught up in his own head to notice the mess he’d made. 

“Shawn.”

He turned to look at you, his cheeks flushed and his hair a mess from constantly pulling at it. Your heart broke and you so badly wanted to reach out and wrap him in a hug, but that probably wasn’t the best move right now considering the circumstances so you held back, instead offering him the socks and shoes. 

“Put these on and try to avoid stepping on the shards, okay? Go lay down. I’ll clean this up.”

While he didn’t show any reaction to your instructions, he did as you told him, carefully slipping on the footwear and treading out of the bathroom to his bed.

It took a bit of time to clean up the glass, especially when it came to scooping it out of the sink and off the countertop, but you did it, sweeping it several times to ensure there were no shards left behind. It was only when you’d finished the task, put the broom back, and dumped the glass in the trash that you went to Shawn. 

He was sitting up now, his legs hanging off the side of the bed and his feet bare of the amenities you’d provided him just minutes ago. Unsure of how to go about the situation, you sat on the floor in front of him and reached for his hand. He let you have it, and you were surprised to see he only had a few shallow cuts from the breakage. You decided you’d deal with those later. For now, though, you needed to deal with the mental wounds. 

You sat in silence, trying desperately to find the right words to say to get Shawn to talk to you. Lucky for you, though, you didn’t have to. 

“I-I didn’t mean what I said,” Shawn said, his voice hoarse and cracking. “Any of it—all of it. I didn’t mean it.”

“I know,” you replied quietly, tracing the lines of his palm. 

Shawn swallowed and shook his head, his free hand clenching into a fist. “I don’t know why I did it. I was just so-so angry and I couldn’t stop and I just…” He trailed off, his eyes laden with the self-hatred he’d been guarding from sight all these months. His eyes shut as if he knew what you‘d spotted and his head tilted away from you. 

“Hey,” you said softly, interlacing his fingers with yours and working with his other hand to do the same. “Look at me.”

It took awhile but eventually Shawn complied. His eyes were red-rimmed and watery, so sad and so genuinely upset that it made your own eyes water. 

You physically watched as all of the burden Shawn had been carrying around suddenly came down on him, his shoulders dropping and every muscle in his body relaxing to the point where he was falling forward. You jumped to your feet, catching his weight and pulling him into your mid-section. A broken sob left his lips, and you were quick to hold him firmly against your chest as you played with his tangled curls. 

You let him cry, let his wounded hands twist into your shirt even when it rose up and exposed your abdomen, let his tears and dribbles of blood soak through the thin fabric of the only clothing you had with you. Because this was the breakdown. This was the crash. 

You resisted shushing Shawn like you would a crying child, knowing that if you didn’t let him break then he wouldn’t be able to build himself back up—as much as it hurt you to watch. “I’ve got you, bub,” you whispered instead. “I’m here.”

Eventually Shawn’s tears slowed but he didn’t move, allowing you to continue your soothing touches and calming words. His hands slowly moved from your shirt to your waist, his fingers tracing patterns along the bare skin there. You felt him frown and he tilted his head up, looking at you concernedly. 

“You’re freezing.”

You rolled your eyes with a small smile. It drove you crazy sometimes how utterly selfless he was, but you’d be lying if you said it wasn’t one of your favorite traits of his—one of the traits that drew you to him in the first place.  “I’m fine, Shawn.”

“Did you wear a coat?” he insisted. 

“No, I-“ You stopped at his disapproving look and exhaled. “I am fine, Shawn. It’s you I’m worried about, not me.”

Your words seemed to chase him away, as he rigidly pulled back into a sitting position and moved his eyes away from yours at the remark. You sighed and took a seat next to him, looking at your dangling feet versus his solidly planted ones before taking his hand again and guiding him to look at you. 

“Talk to me, Shawn,” you simply said, your voice the gentlest you could make it. 

He took a deep breath, letting it escape heavily through his nose. “I feel so pathetic.”

“Why?” you prodded, and when he shook his head you softly reminded him, “Bub, it’s just me.”

It took awhile for him to open up, but you stayed patient. You watched him as he formed the words in his head, trying to figure it out just as much as you were. 

“I’m supposed to be making music,” Shawn started quietly. “I know how pathetic I look each time I walk out of the studio with nothing more than what I brought in. Everyone’s waiting on me, expecting me to do something. It’s been months—months—and I’ve got nothing. I’ve done three albums back to back with no problem, I’ve done countless shows and tours and festival runs, but I have nothing now. No music, no ideas, no inspiration—nothing. And...and it makes me nothing.”

You paused. “If having nothing makes you nothing,” you said, choosing your words carefully, “then why am I here right now?” 

Shawn didn’t reply, training his eyes away from you and to the wall in front of him. You could see you’d simultaneously struck a chord with him and backed him into a corner; the only way Shawn could reply was either by telling you he didn’t know, which you both knew was false, or with self-deprecating reasoning, which you wouldn’t let slide for a second. 

You swallowed, knowing your next words would be extremely controversial. “Have you ever thought that maybe this is your mind’s way of telling you it’s time to take a break?”

Shawn immediately tensed, his head snapping back to you. “I am taking a break,” he argued. 

“No, you’re not,” you said, keeping your composure. “You’re working yourself twice as much as normal. You barely sleep, you hardly eat or drink anything other than what I give you, you never have the ‘time’ to hang out with me or your friends anymore, your mental health is spiralling-“ You quickly came to a stop, watching the fight you’d just recently seen in Shawn’s eyes begin to drain again at the last item on your list. “Shawn, I don’t know what taking a break means to you,” you began, “but to me it means letting go of your responsibilities—letting them disappear to the back of your mind where you won’t have to see them for awhile. It means relaxing, not worrying about deadlines or expectations or anything else remotely pressuring.”

Shawn was quiet, letting your words soak in. You and everyone else (including his fans) agreed it was time he took a break, but getting Shawn to agree himself was a whole other challenge. 

“I just…” He struggled for a moment, fiddling with his fingers and looking down. “I just feel like I’m not enough.”

There it is, you thought sadly. 

You gently grasped his chin and moved it until he was looking at you again. He looked so vulnerable, and you knew that whatever you said in the next moment could break him if you weren’t careful. 

“Shawn Peter Raul Mendes,” you breathed, “I promise you on all the stars in the world that you are and always will be enough. And if I have to promise you that every day for the rest of my life, I will. You are enough, Shawn, and the day you aren’t is the day tomorrow never comes.”

His eyes filled with tears again. He grabbed you and pulled you into his lap, burying his head in the crook of your neck and hugging you so tightly you could barely breathe. 

“You’re everything to me, Y/N,” he whispered. “I don’t know what I would do without you.”

You couldn’t help but smile as you carded your fingers through his tangled hair. “Probably break another mirror.”

Shawn let out a choked laugh, his breath giving you goosebumps. He squeezed you tighter and placed a soft kiss on your shoulder. “Please don’t leave,” he whispered. “I love you so much, Y/N. I’m so in love with you, I’m sorry.”

“I love you too, Shawn,” you said, trying to hide the lump you now had in your throat. “I’m so in love with you, too. I’m not leaving, I promise.”

You held on to each other like that until the wee hours of the morning where you fell asleep in a different position but still curled up just the same. And when you woke up and were met with  Shawn’s sleeping face and gentle snoring, you realized that you wanted to wake up to that every day for the rest of your life. 

As if he could hear your thoughts, Shawn subconsciously hugged you closer, his lips upturned in a soft smile. 

“You are enough, Shawn Peter Raul Mendes,” you whispered, prepared to mark today as the first day of the promise you’d make to him every day from now until forever. “I promise on all the stars in the world.”

---

Permanent Tags: @dahliaspidey​ (There were a few others here whose URLs must have changed, plus I’m redoing all of my tag lists, so if you’re interested in being added to any of my tag lists check out the link in my bio!)

Shawn/Fic Tags: @odd-lil-duck @rava13 @deamus-liv @mendesficsxbombay​

#shawn mendes #shawn mendes x reader #shawn mendes x y/n #shawn mendes x you #shawn mendes angst #shawn mendes fluff #shawn mendes hurt/comfort #hurt/comfort #shawn mendes fic #shawn mendes fanfiction #shawn mendes fandom #shawn mendes imagine #shawn mendes blurb #shawn mendes oneshot #one shot

[smallrainclouds]

Made To Break

Yandere!Hypnos x reader (gender neutral)

Word count: 5k

Warning: Yandere bevaiour, dubcon/noncon, sex in later parts

No beta. Read at your own risk.

A/N: part one of two. Enjoy.

Your father was a fool.

But perhaps You were just as foolish.

💮

When the letter arrived, you couldn't believe that the same man wrote it.

Your father always wrote in neat, tight letters but the letters You got were loopy, large letters that fused together at odd parts.

You sat in your car outside your childhood home. The front yard was nothing but overgrown grass now. You could see the lack of care the home had gotten over the years in the cracks and chipped off paint. The overcast skies and trees with just a few leaves holding on only added to the depressing picture.

You bit your lip as you pulled out your father's letter from your bag.

With shaky hands, you unfolded it again for what must have been hundreds of times.

'My dearest child.

I gave it all up. I have found a way to eternity. But it cost me everything.

Forgive me.

I just wanted to see your mother again.

Father.'

"Madness. Simply mad." You murmured. You could feel the tears welled up in your eyes, you knew your father loved your mom. Her loss had slowly eaten him alive since you were a child.

Now he was just a body in a hospital room. It was unlike any coma the doctors had seen before.

The doctor, an older woman with short gray hair and sharp blue eyes, had felt more like a grandmother than a doctor.

But even with her kind face couldn't soften the blow that your father will likely never wake up again.

You sniffed as you used your hoodie sleeve to rub at your eyes.

"Okay. Okay. You got this. This was your home too." You tried to smooth yourself with little success. With a deep breath for courage, you made your way to the house.

When you got inside the dark house, you stubbed your foot on the piles of books by the door and they promptly fell over into a heap.

"Urg, fuc-owww. Okay, Y/N great start.Just amazing." You pulled out your phone. You could make the numerous texts from your partner-no, now your ex but you just bypass those for the flashlight.

You shone the light around, there was nothing but a big mess. Books and papers had overtaken the house and you can smell the old fast food bags that piled into the corner.

You could see on one wall, writing in wasn't in English and strange markings. A single gold and red eye stared back.

"Fuck."

💮

Hours later, you had made headway in the madness that was now your childhood home.

At least your room had been mostly spared. Only some odd books here and there. And the many, many dried poppies on your floor.

You tossed the broom on the floor as you flop down along with it. You didn't realize how bad it had gotten. You only got your room back to normal, let alone the rest of the house.

Guilt swelled in your chest, you should have been more aware. You knew your dad wasn't the most stable person which isn't good but this was something else.

But…

But...

You had been busy dealing with your 'friends' group, the breakup and the last of your exams.

You covered your face, you already cried three times today and you weren't not about to start again.

Your phone buzzed, and you couldn't stop the laugh. Speak of the devil.

You rolled over to your side and pulled your phone close to you.

You swipe away the message, you were not dealing with any of your former friends right now. Your cheating jerk of an ex could keep them all. You had far more important matters to attend to now.

You opened up the gallery app, you took many photos as you could with the last of the daylight left.

You zoomed in on the writing, you had thought it was nonsense at first but after a few more looks,you could see the repeated words. You just didn't know the language.

There was something deeply wrong in this house. You could swear you could feel something was in there with you. But if friend or foe you weren't sure. You tried not to think about how your only protection was your childhood baseball bat.

But what did your dad do? You normally are able to pick apart what your dad was doing but this was something else unknown. You kept checking the pictures with the creepy red and gold eye in hope of finding something.

Slowly you could feel tiredness sinking in your bones, and before you knew it, your eyes drifted shut.

💮

A warm hand cupped your cheek, and you pressed into it with a sigh. You couldn't remember the last time you were touched so tenderly. You think for a moment it was your ex but they never did that before.

The hand left but then you were lifted up against a warm chest. You heard murmurs as sleep pulled you under again.

💮

Rushing water reached your ears and for a moment, you thought you could hear the sounds of birds.

It took you a moment to notice that you weren't in normal clothes but a tunic that went over one shoulder. You saw a brooch with two wings in its place. You should be more worried but you felt too tired to care.

You turned your head with a yawn. Whose lap were You using as a pillow? Before you could look, a hand covered your eyes.

"Not yet, You still need more time." A man's voice... but You didn't recognize it. You made a questioning sound but he hushed you gently.

"Blood and darkness, you are just as beautiful as I remember."

You reached up and stroked his hand, trying to understand what was going on.

"I don't remember… you." You slurred quietly.

"I know. It's not your fault. All it matters is that I found you again."

His thumb rubbed your cheek, "Now go back to sleep. I will be there soon."

You sighed as you sunk back into sleep.

💮

You stared at your bedroom wall, not able to breathe. There was someone else here and they apparently tucked you in bed, blanket pulled up to your chin and all.

You took a breath and tried to listen to any sounds. You waited, surely you would hear footsteps or something.

But there were no sounds, none at all.

It took all of your nerves to get out of bed. You grabbed your childhood baseball bat, it was small but you could still get a good hit in.

You remembered you left your phone on the ground and turned to look for it. It wasn't there, not on your nightstand or desk.

'Great, some creep definitely got my phone.' you tighten your hold on the bat, and after listening for a moment, you slowly push the door opened.

Without saying a word, you slowly walked out though the house. You were sure you would find out who invited themselves in.

The mess was still the same, the writing on the wall was still there. You went through the house twice and found nothing.

You heard the sound of a single bird singing in the backyard. You followed the sounds, it almost felt like it was calling you.

The bat dropped from your hand and You couldn't stop the tears in your eyes.

The backyard had been overtaken by red poppies, there was almost no grass left. the singing stopped when you stepped outside. But a soft hoot had You stared up into the tree and saw a single little owl stared back at you.

It's eyes were light yellow.

💮

It was late morning now, the overcast skies have darkened and You are sure it will start snowing soon.

You had given up finding your phone. You s out of your bedroom.

"Fine, you can have it! Good luck guessing the password, you jerk!" You shouted into the backyard. There was no response but you didn't expect one. You had already tried to find the owl but it must have flown off.

You couldn't stand the smell of the old food anymore and tossed it. You found some tea that was still good and stood in the kitchen, waiting for the water to boil.

You changed out your tight jeans and hoodie for a pair of much more comfortable jeans and an oversize sweater.

Thankfully, like your bedroom, the kitchen was also mostly clean. You found as many candles as you could, which wasn't many. Two kept the kitchen dimly lit.

You checked the light bulbs, nearly all of them had burned out. Just one more thing for you to fix.

You rubbed your face with a sigh, at least all the appliances were working. And you won't have to go without water either.

You flipped through your dad's notebooks in hopes of finding something. It was in the second notebook you finally found a name. It had been underlined and circled.

"Hypnos?" You murmured, "Who the hell is that?" It doesn't sound like a human name you heard of.

You made your tea, tucked the notebook under your arm. After cleaning off the big armchair and side table, You began going through the books in the living room. Nearly all of them were about ancient Greece, which you knew nothing about.

Your eyes went to the wall writings, that would explain why you didn't know any of the words.

Did your dad believe this stuff? You looked down at the open notebook in your lap. You skim some of the pages, the only name that came up was Hypnos.

"The god of sleep, huh?" You looked at the stacks of books. Why would your dad care about some god of sleep?

You keep looking though, and found a basic guide to Greek mythology. You flipped through the pages, "Come on Hypnos babe, where are you…"

You grinned when you saw the name in bold print. You skim past most of the information, but one part caught your eyes.

Despite being considered as a gentle and kind god, he has been known to strike others down. In the death of his lover by a human warrior (whose name had been lost to time) he had caused the world to go into a permanent state of sleep, never to waken again.

Only his mother Nyx, goddess of night, was able to talk him down or fight him depending on the storyteller and restore the world. In oral storytelling that has been recorded, it is said that he still uses dreams in hope of finding his lost love.

"Oh dad. No wonder." Your heart twisted, sad that your dad's last days have been spent on some myth. He must have been so far gone to think any of it was real.

But was he wrong? You stared out the window, knowing there was somehow a field of poppies waiting.

Your gut flipped, and told yourself it was just one of those freakish nature things.

💮

You didn't quite realize when you fell asleep. You sighed when you felt a hand touch your forehead followed by a kiss.

You tried to wake up, but the voice murmured something and you just hummed. Your eyelids are too heavy to open anyway.

When the arms scooped you again, you just sighed and curled against the chest.

💮

You felt soft grass tickle your face. You pushed yourself up quickly. You were in the tunic again and you could see a sea of poppies and other flowers surrounding you.

A thick fog of sleepiness tried to pull you back but you ignored it. Not again, damnit.

You stood up, your legs felt so wobbly like a baby deer. Dispise your best attempt, You fell on your knees, the call to sleep overpowering.

You gasped when a hand covered your eyes. You grabbed his wrist, "No, I don't want to go back to sleep." You could feel the fog of sleep growing stronger. You kicked at his legs but got nothing but air.

"I'm sorry, but not yet." His voice came next to your ear, you could feel his breath on your skin. You tried to move away but you fell against him. Your head lolled upward against a shoulder.

An arm wrapped around your waist and held you firm.

"Soon, I promise. I just have to handle a few more things. I will be here when you wake up." A kiss was pressed against your temple.

You wanted demand for answers but you were already falling back into the darkness.

💮

"Not again." You moaned. You sat up, the blanket pooled in your lap. What in the world was going on?

You were back in the oversize sweater and jeans. You press your fingers against your temple. Those kisses felt so real.

Are you going mad too? Just like your dad? You gulped, feeling so very alone.

An hour later and some crying, You somehow found the willpower to make it out of bed. Snow was falling down now and a healthy inch was already on the ground.

You made it to the living room when you saw him by the window, snow falling down against the glass. His sheer size made the living room seem smaller. He was reading one of your dad's notebooks in one hand, a quill floated around next to him.

Some part of you, deep inside of you knew were looking at Hypnos, God of sleep.

"It's you." Your voice cracked. His shoulders tensed up as he turned. Bright, yellow eyes stared at you. "Oh you were the owl too weren't you?" You said numbly.

He nodded slowly, "You've been crying again." He said concerned, his eyes scanned you up and down. He tossed the notebook to the side as he took a step toward you.

Unable to tear your eyes away, you grabbed for the first thing you could reach, a thick and heavy book. And with all of your strength, you launched it at his head.

"Blood and darkness!" He ducked to the side. You reached for another and hurled it.

"It's you!" You snarled, feeling like a rabid animal. "You did this! What did you do to my dad?! To my fucking phone?!"

The bastard ducked again. "Hey, I didn't do anything he didn't ask for!" He held up his palms, stretched out to show he wasn't a threat.

"I won't hurt you. I would never lay a finger on you, Y/N." His voice was soft, kind like he was dealing with some animal.

You stared for a moment, rage overtaking any sense you had. "You've been the asshole putting me to bed every night." You grabbed another book and hurled it. "How dare you!"

And of course, he sidestepped the book. Which just made you angier.

"I don't care if you're a god. Make my dad go back to normal. Or I will find a way to hurt you somehow!"

"He didn't tell you anything did he?" The god asked, a wry smile on his face. You picked up another book, and he just sighed. "Have you tried aiming? Sounds crazy, I know but maybe you could actually hit me this time?"

"You don't get to be disparaging, not with all the trouble you made for me." You gestured with the book as if it would help make your point.

You stood behind the armchair, using it as a shield. You knew you wouldn't win in a physical fight but you weren't going to make it easy for him.

Hypnos sighed, "No, no you're right. I'm sorry." He ran a hand through his curls, a soft smile on his face.

"I'm happy though, you are still as courageous as you always have been. I wasn't sure what I would find after all this time."

"What are you talking about? I have never seen you before. I think I would remember meeting an ancient god." You snarled, not enjoying whatever game the god was playing with you.

"Most people don't try to fight a god with books, my love. Not even other gods." Hypnos smiled.

"If I had something stronger, I would beat you with that. Be happy that I don't have my bat on me. You still didn't answer anything."

You pointed at the wall with writings. "I want answers and I want them now. You said we met before, when?"

Hypnos was silent, his eyes tracing the words on the wall. He stepped closer to the center of the wall, his fingers traced the words. "So that's where he messed up. I told him to check with me before doing anything." He murmured to himself.

After a moment, he looked at you.

"In your past life, you were going to be my consort. I've been looking for you for a very long time.."

You stared, quiet in your disbelief. He waved a hand toward the wall, "Problem is that the spell got messed up. I think your father was rushing and couldn't finish the spell the proper way. That's why you don't remember anything."

You shook your head, laughing "No, none of this makes sense."

"Y/N, stop hiding behind that ugly chair, and we can talk more about what happened." Hypnos' voice tried to sound calming, but you heard an undercurrent of eagerness. Of hunger to it.

You shook your head, "No, and don't take another step toward me. I can see what you're doing. That lighting thing your fingers are doing, Hypnos." You tighten your grip on the book, cursing yourself for leaving your bat up your bedroom. Not that it would be much better.

Hypnos' fingers abruptly stopped the magic spell. His smile faded and his eyes stayed on you, waiting for your next move.

You eyed him, you haven't been able to land a single hit on him but you didn't see any signs of super speed yet.

You might be able to get out of the house and into the car before he could get you. But what if he just could teleport or something you haven't thought of?

It was a risk you would have to take because since you saw him, he watched you like you were some prey for him and you didn't want to stick around to find out what Hypnos had planned.

The living room front way will be no good but the backdoor was in the kitchen, if you could make that, it would be a longer run but you would have far more chances for escape…

You dropped everything and took off like a shot into the kitchen. You almost sailed into the sink but used the motion for more speed.

You heard Hypnos yelled your name followed by something you were sure was a swear word in Greek.

The yard, full of poppies and snow greeted you, you hissed as your socks got soaked from the snow.

You almost made it to the gate, and past that, you could see your car.

Freedom.

You didn't see the root sticking out of the ground, but you saw it on the way down.

The breath knocked out of you when you slammed into the cold ground and mere seconds afterwards, you felt hands on your shoulders followed by a pressure against your back. Hypnos leaned down, his lips against your ear, and he spoke in must have been Greek.

"No. Nonono." You gasped, fighting for breath but he just shushed you. His fingers brushed against your cheeks almost lovingly.

Your eyelids slided shut.

💮

When you woke up, your fingers were curled against an unfamiliar red blanket. You sighed as your eyes drifted shut, you couldn't remember the last time you felt so….warm and safe.

You heard the sounds of paper moving around and your eyes fluttered open.

Hypnos must have cleared off the sofa and placed you there. You could see the written wall behind him, post-it notes dotted between the words and some of them were covered with lined paper, new words on it.

Hypnos was sitting on the ground, notebooks and paper surrounded him. A quill tip between his teeth, his golden eyes almost glowed in the dim lighting.

It took a moment of staring but you noticed Hypnos's cloak was gone. Your fingers tighten when you realize you were under his cloak. You took a moment to look at him as he kept reading the notebook

While he wasn't the broadest person you've ever seen, there was a solidness to him. You could see the lean muscles in his arms and shoulders. The gold bands he wore only highlighted the muscles.

You tore your eyes away. 'Jerk.' you thought even as your cheeks warmed.

"I don't like you very much." You spoke, voice rough with sleep.

Hypnos looked up to you, not saying anything. He took out the quill and twilled it between his fingers.

You rolled your eyes at him, unmoving your spot under his cloak. He stared, looking thoughtful for a second before he leaned toward you with a wide smile on his lips, "If you don't like me then you should return my cloak."

"No, it's mine now." The words slipped out your mouth before you knew it.

You blinked at his laugh. You thought he would be upset.

Hypnos chuckled fondly, "Word for word."

At your questioning look, he continued.

"You don't remember yet but the first time we met, you were trying to find medicine for humans. I think you were upset at me because you got lost in my cave. I brought you back home and I gave you my cloak so you could get warm."

You sat up against the arm rest, holding on to the cloak. Not ready to give up the feeling of safety yet. You bit your lip, not quite sure what to say.

His eyes glazed over, the quill still spinning between his fingers. His voice turned quiet. "You were so beautiful, so strong, so determined. You fought for humanity, not that they even remember, those worthless animals, the whole lot."

He seemed lost in a memory so you just waited it out, letting him talk.

"You hated the fact I took half of their lives away from them. And that I often took more."

His eyes meet yours, and his whole face softens. You flushed at the realization that you could make him do that, to have that much power over another being let alone a god.

"I couldn't give up the half, it was mine by birthright but I was slower afterward, let them have more time to themselves. And I never took more than half. The only reason I got called a kind god was because of you."

You stood up, still holding on the cloak and walked over to him. His eyes never left you, and you had to tell yourself to ignore the butterflies in your stomach.

You kneeled next to him and after a second, you reached out to touch his shoulder. You were surprised at how warm he was, how human-like he felt. Maybe you were wrong about him.

"Hypnos. I-I I'm sorry you lost them. I can hear how much you love them, especially after all this time. But I am not whoever you think I-"

"How much I love you." Hypnos interrupted, his hand covered your own. "I never stopped looking for you. I just need more time to fix this." He waved a hand to the wall.

You shook your head, "I am not then though. You are just like my dad, always looking for a person who isn't there."

"No, your father was. The woman who birthed you died and is in the underworld now. You, however, are here in front of me." Hypnos leaned closer, he tightened his hold but it wasn't painful, it was almost comforting. "You are them, your eyes, your lips, your nose even the way you move and talk. You are them, given life again."

"How?!" You said despairing,surely even he could see what nonsense he was saying? "How could a god become reborn as a human? Or even go back to being a god?"

"There are ways. There is always a way." Hypnos replied darkly. He took your other hand and held them between his own warm hands. "You haven't even let me talk to you, to tell you what happened."

"I don't want to." You whispered, "I don't need to know what happened. I just want to know what it will take for you to understand that I am not them."

Hypnos didn't say anything for a few minutes and the silence grew heavy.

"Did he summon you?" You asked, trying not to feel guilty, looking at the swirls of words on the wall, in the middle of the circle was a single red and gold eye staring back.

Hypnos stared at the wall along with you, "He really didn't tell you anything did he?"

You dug out the letter from your front pocket. "This was the last thing he wrote to me. This isn't his normal writing."

Hypnos read the letter, his eyebrows rose and reread it again. "Blood and darkness, what a damn fool."

"Hey, that's my dad you know." You murmured, "Also you guys are both doing the same thing, you with me, and he with my mom."

"No, not nearly the same thing." Hypnos scoffed. You rolled your eyes at his words. You moved on, tired of this fight for now.

"Where did dad get this information anyway?" You asked.

Hypnos sighed as he rubbed his forehead. "From me. I loaned out the books I have for this kind of stuff. He told me that he could handle the translation since it had to be a two person spell, think of it as a bridge, your dad could visit your mom every time he dreamt. But I had to be on the other side to help build it."

"You trusted him? I mean you seem like you don't like humans."

"I didn't. This whole mess just proved my point. But…" Hypnos shrugged, "I knew you wouldn't let me just take you without making sure your dad wasn't alone. I wanted you to want to come back to me, especially after everything I've done."

You brushed your fingers along the cloak, "Are you talking about when you put the whole world to sleep?"

"And most of the gods." Hypnos added. "I still don't remember much of what I did. My mother or brother still hasn't spoken to me since then."

Hypnos looked so worn down, his brow furrowed and you wanted to smooth the stress away from him but you held back. You already let him touch you even if it made you want to run. Toward him or away from him you couldn't say.

"I've been so blinded by the thought of having you in my arms again, I didn't foresee him going rogue on me." He murmured quietly.

Hypnos fixed his gaze on you, but you looked away, cursing the flush on your cheeks.

"I took care of the stuff he wouldn't have been able to do. With the underworld and stuff. But he fucked up, he changed the spell without telling me. And he did it badly. He tried to bring her from the underworld and you can't do that, and now he has to deal with the punishment."

"Well, can't you just erase it? Or do a new spell? I mean, you are a god right? Do you even need this stuff?"

Hypnos slid his fingers under your chin, making you look at him. "Listen to me." His serious tone kept you from pulling away. "No one can't take the dead from the underworld. Not me, not Hades or even my mother. It's the cost of life. Right now, he is being punished for his pride and when he does die, there is a good chance he won't be able to find your mother."

You swallow, your heart breaking, "Is there nothing you can do?"

"I don't know." Hypnos said. "I was already putting my neck on the line just to let them have a link."

"What if I agree to go with you, to see if I am the one you are looking for? I will do whatever you need me to." You asked.

Hypnos didn't respond, his eyes glazed.

"Hypnos, please." You begged, "I can't just let him die like this-"

He spoke finally, "I will talk to Persephone. I can't promise anything. I'm still banned from the house after the 'Great Sleep'."

"Thank you! Thank you, Hypnos." You felt dizzy with relief and hugged him. You squeezed him, and buried your face in his neck. "Thank you."

"Don't thank me yet." Hypnos chuckled, his hands on your back,"You might not like what you'll get."

#hypnos x reader #yandere #self insert #hades hypnos

[brat-tamer69]

Dead Branches and New Leaves

♡ Summary: Levi’s relationship with his son Eren reaches a new low, and Y/N is there to confront Levi in an effort to rebuild. Very much inspired by this picture and in response to this request.

Part Two TBA

♡ Notable Tags: AU, Married, Parenting, Levi x Fem!Reader, Broken family, daddy issues, argument, angst and over 3k words holy shit!

❥ Disclaimer: Levi and his actions in this are not intended to be perceived as anything other than him being emotionally unavailable. He lost his temper and it is acknowledged numerous times that he is remorseful. I would like to emphasize that he is not emotionally or verbally abusive but this content may be upsetting to some readers. Please use your own discretion if you are sensitive to the topics.

♡ Send requests here!

Levi’s head instinctively whipped around to face the house’s front entrance when the screen gritted against the doorframe’s track. If he was not mistaken, his son would come bounding into the house from the front yard to ask for yet another snack. And Levi would once again shave down a carrot and before handing it over so it could be crunched down in seconds. How the kid had the energy to take off and put on his rain boots so many times in such quick succession, Levi didn’t know. But Eren did thankfully understand that if not for that talent, his dad would rip him a new one for tracking mud onto the freshly mopped tile.

As if summoned by thought alone, the percussive pattern of little feet hitting the floors echoed, and the urgency in it suggested that he was running. Levi pressed his lips together and closed his eyes, trying to cling onto what felt like the last second of peace he might have since Eren was running.

“Dad! Dad!” the toddler addressed him shrilly.

“What is it, runt?” Levi sighed and rotated in his spot in front of the stove to face his son.

“I was playing outside, and- and there was a big boom in the sky! And- And I wasn’t scared at all,” he added matter-of-factly. “But there was a little kitty outside, and I think him was scared.”

Levi stared down at the boy, bemused by how he managed to squirm and point every which way during a ten-second-long story. He then shifted his gaze back in the direction of the screen door, praying that Eren had possessed enough sense to close it behind him on the way in as the heavy rain had been accompanied by wind all morning. Levi had bargained with Y/N to support his stance of keeping Eren indoors but, in exercise of her wonderful parenting strategy, she insisted it would be better for him to play outside and get used to the daunting nature of thunderstorms.

Well, it’s working, Levi noted as he circled around the “big boom” Eren pointedly mentioned he wasn’t scared of. Still, his concerns were loyal to the furry little pest that seemed to be taking shelter in his front yard. “It’s ‘he was scared’,” Levi corrected. “And that’s too bad. Maybe he’ll run off somewhere safe on his own.”

Eren deflated, his shoulders and his volume falling while the size of his eyes grew. “But what if he can’t, Dad? What if the rain gets him sick?”

“Then the rain gets him sick,” Levi shrugged. “Not everything is meant to survive in this kind of weather, Eren. Besides, he might already be sick if he’s out there hanging around our house.”

An indiscernible emotion flashed across Eren’s face and disappeared just as quickly Levi picked up on it. But before he could engage, Eren was sprinting away and to the front yard again.

“Whatever,” he mumbled to the likes of himself. One thing he’d learned since become a father was that the less he knew, the better. If Eren did do something drastic like fall into a puddle of mud or befriend a sickly cat, he would scale the mountain of mishap once he approached it. For now, he had his focus on finishing dinner just as he promised his wife he would, and that was all he had the mental energy to do.

Perhaps one too many moments passed where Levi worked on simmering his kimchi nabe in the quiet, the slightly gentler rain being the only noise in the background. As he replaced the lid to the pot, he seemed to simultaneously sink back into reality. The thunder had finally ebbed. Y/N was still working on hemming some of Eren’s new clothes…

And Eren. The damn toddler that was notorious for popping up for snacks and attention hadn’t reappeared once in the past twenty minutes. The thought made Levi’s mouth dry and his throat swell faster than they would if he’d have swallowed a handful of cotton rounds. “Son of a bitch,” he muttered. A clenched fist still equipped with a ladle, Levi set a brisk stride toward the front yard where, if his nonexistent god had any mercy, Eren would still be playing in the rain.

During the walk, the rain, the shuffle of his house slippers against the tile, and every other noise slowly faded. All he had in his ears was the vivid imaginary scream of his wife as she found out her son went missing under his watch. And the image of Eren with teary eyes burdened by fear was not any kinder to his growing panic.

“Shit–” he spat.

“Momma said that’s a curse.”

Levi looked down at the origin of the voice, the relief he felt in seeing Eren standing in front of him in perfectly healthy condition lasting but a second. It was instantly replaced by rage. As the panic drained from his body, every inch of him became ignited by disgust, disappointment, grief and a slew of other emotions he was too angry to even process. The blankness in his mind caused by the adrenaline rush was being filled in by the stench of the sopping wet stray cat being held out in front of him. “Eren…” he seethed in a low voice. “What the hell is that?”

Eren chewed his lower lip in hesitation. Levi almost wrenched when the boy had the gall to hoist the rancid being up higher, as if his father wanted to inspect it. “It’s the kitty! See?” he answered in earnest. “It’s the kitty I told you about! I told him to go find a new house so he doesn’t get sick, but he didn’t want to! And his tummy is bleeding, too!”

A soaking wet, bloody, feral cat. Levi didn’t know if he should give in to the hysterical, exasperated laughter bubbling in the depths of his stomach or if falling to his knees and sobbing would free him from the chaos he felt. Helpless to his anger toward his own child, all he could do was touch his hand to his face in a feeble display of his emotion. The outwardly endless consequences to Eren bringing a bleeding cat inside the house started to appear in his mind one by one, each adding to the pressure he felt building underneath his temples.

“Daddy?” Eren squeaked.

Levi was so distracted by his inner turmoil that he hadn’t even realized the minutes of silence that passed between them. “Go put it outside and wash your hands. Now.”

By the particular tone of voice his father used, Eren knew better than than to disobey him—even a single casual command from Levi would normally be enough to move him. But after trading glances between his dad and the injured cat, Eren shook his head.

Levi was in disbelief. He could feel his heart racing with every ounce of searing blood it sent through his veins. His hand trembled as it gradually fell from his face to reveal a nearly crazed expression, his eyes opened as wide as they could go but his brows furrowed impossibly low over them. “Did you just shake your head at me, boy?”

“Uh, well, the- the kitty is scared and has blood on him,” Eren gulped. “H-He can’t stay outsi–”

“Put it outside. And the next time I have to repeat myself, I’ll put you and the damn cat out.”

A small gasp escaped Eren’s quivering lips, but he swallowed it quickly before tucking the cat underneath his arm and escaping out the front door in a flash. Levi sucked in a shuddered breath, only now noticing the thick, brown splatters of mud and the droplets of red that created a trail to the yard and soiled his previously spotless tile.

“What happened? Where’s Eren?” Y/N’s soft voice questioned as she paced into the kitchen. “I heard you raise your voice. What’s going on?”

The worry in his wife’s shaky words gave way to her equal distress if not for the hand gently laid over her heart. It was enough to draw the ire from Levi’s body. Like the bright red leaving the eye of a cooling stove, anger steadily seeped from parts of him he wasn’t even aware were tensed. His set jaw unclenched, he lowered his shoulders and his fingers loosened from their intense hold on the ladle.

“Eren,” Levi replied to his wife in a breath at long last.

“Eren what?” she urged, her pupils growing.

“Eren’s fine. He just brought a fucking dying cat into our house.”

Confusion distorted Y/N’s features while her eyes moved frantically across Levi’s face in search for some sort of unspoken answer. When she didn’t receive it, she whirled around with a small huff then grabbed a fistful of her skirts and hurried to the front yard.

By her reaction itself, Levi knew he was finished. Y/N’s kindness knew no bounds in even the most stressful situation. In circumstances where his own instinct would be to react first, his wife was guided by the purest ethics; she would comfort, ask questions then gather herself enough to find a solution. But her consideration skipped him this time, and it was because she was livid with him. Levi could tell that much.

Bending at the knee to retrieve the cleaning supplies from the cabinets, he expelled a wearied sigh. He figured there was no better way to postpone is annoyance with the situation than by losing himself in the pleasures of cleaning on his hands and knees. He forced himself to focus on the acrid scent of chemicals burning his nostrils instead of the gut-wrenching sobs he could hear once his wife opened the front door. He tried to remember which solution was best to polish the ivory colored tile, but god damn it, he couldn’t think when he saw Eren’s little body, defeated and dripping wet, shuffling down the hall. His knuckles blanched as he all but strangled the cloth, putting all his upper body strength into scrubbing away what little remained of the muddy footprints.

Y/N watched Levi in silence for a brief period, absorbing how pathetic he looked down on the floor, frantically erasing the nonexistent spots while his son cried himself to sleep in the other room. She didn’t know what possessed her, but her nails were starting to dig into her palms in effect of how hard she was trying to contain it. If not for the pitiful picture of her baby boy standing outside, wailing over the corpse of a cat, she might have been frightened; she had never felt this way about Levi. But today was different—for everyone.

Levi released his rag and sat back on his heels when the shadow of his wife fell over him. At the same time, a coldness that he was far from feeling fell over his eyes. He could only hope it would protect him even a little bit.

“What the hell did you do?” Y/N demanded of him through her teeth, her voice faulted by an emotional tremolo.

He rose to face her and swiped his palms over his apron. “I did what any parent would do if their kid brought in a dying cat from outside. I told him to put the vermin back where he found it and wash his hands.”

“You cursed at him,” she sneered. “And you threatened to put him out of the house if he didn’t listen to you. It’s raining!”

He tried to keep his voice leveled though his need to emphasize his point superseded the attempt. “Well, if he listened to me the first time, I wouldn’t have cursed. And he’s a smart kid– He knows I wasn’t going to put him out.”

Already jaded by the argument, Levi mentally readied himself for Y/N’s rebuttal. But it didn’t come. Instead, her open hand flashed across his line of peripheral vision, and if it weren’t for his unique reflexes, it would have left a bright red print on his left cheek. Overwhelmed by the sequence of events, Levi’s defenses fell. By putting his energy in holding his wife’s wrist tightly, just mere inches away from his face, he’d lost his composure. His mouth went dry as it fell slightly agape and his eyebrows were pressed upwards together in sheer astonishment.

“Y/N–”

“You bastard!” she cried, her tears leaking through her voice as well as onto her face. “Do you have any idea how scared and alone he felt, watching that cat die in the rain?! And to make things worse, you were punishing him for your selfish ass obsession with keeping the house clean!”

Levi’s eyes darted past his distraught wife and landed on Eren’s bedroom door, paranoid that his mother’s shrieks might wake him. “It wasn’t like that.”

Y/N shook her wrist in his hold defiantly. “Then explain it to me! Explain to me what the hell you wanted to do! What, were you scared of telling him he couldn’t keep it?”

“No, I wasn’t!” he growled back. “The first thing I told him to do was let the damn thing go. It was a dying cat, Y/N! That thing could have given him or any one of us all kinds of diseases with its filthy fur in seconds! What if it had bit him or scratched him?”

Y/N met her husband’s eyes squarely and stared into them for an unwavering minute. His volume had fallen off marginally by the end of his question. Her eyes narrowed as his softened. She caught him. Letting out a mirthless laugh, she finally ripped her wrist from his grip. “You didn’t even check if it did, so why are you bringing that up as if you actually care?” she whispered.

Shit. “He would have told me it did,” he answered then swallowed, not quite convinced of his answer himself.

“Don’t you get it? He doesn’t want to tell you anything, Levi. And he wouldn’t ever if he had the choice.” He braced himself as he noticed her hands balled at either side of her waist. “You’re so goddamn bent on policing him that you forget to parent him, and you’re nothing but an authoritarian that feeds him. Our son has the biggest heart, and by the way you treat him, he would never know that he got any of it from you because you act just like your father figure, not his.”

Levi prided himself on his steel-like aplomb. But if anyone could melt steel, it was Y/N and any selection of words that came from her heart. Often times, they were sweet—almost cloying as he felt he never deserved her praise. This time, they were filled with venom and provided a sensation no different than someone plunging a blade between his lungs. In fact, each of his breaths in following were shaky at best.

Y/N knew that Levi hated being likened to the weasel of a man that raised him almost as much as he hated the man himself. Still, she pressed on, resolved to defend Eren and put an end to the struggles he had with his dad. “You’re silent,” she pointed out. “Because you know it’s true. I’ve tried so many times to get you to understand, to be more gentle with Eren, and you just aren’t. Today would have been the perfect opportunity for you to bond with him. But you didn’t. You couldn’t even treat him like he was worth something. You didn’t reason with him. You didn’t listen, you didn’t explain the why’s or even make sure he wasn’t being hurt by what was happening. You just cursed at a child– My child for having empathy. And you let him sit out in the rain, grieving and crying alone.”

Nausea washed over Levi as the color drained from his face. He felt as though someone had tied an anchor to his lungs and allowed them to dangle precariously in his chest. Tears sprung to his eyes when he realized that the way Y/N described the evening’s events were simply how it happened for Eren. While Levi had been driven by his compulsion toward cleanliness, Eren was acting on his innocence. The child wasn’t hardened by and consequently numb to death like his father was. Eren only saw an injured animal, retrieved it then looked to his dad for help. And Levi had sent him away, practically abandoning him. Even if it was just for the moment that he’d lost his temper, the impact on Eren was irrevocable.

He started to fix his lips to apologize, but he knew the words would be insultingly inadequate given the circumstance. “What do you want me to do, Y/N?” he asked thickly.

By the time his words were out, it seemed an eternity had passed and Y/N already had most of her back to him. What he could see of her face was a perfect and painfully personal illustration of disillusionment. “I want you to stay here, with Eren.”

“What?” Levi felt his own voice sounded like a distant echo in the room.

“I can’t stand to look at you, to be perfectly honest. And you hurt Eren more than you’ll ever know. You need to fix this—all of it while he’s young or you’ll never have the relationship with him that I always wanted for the both of you.”

Y/N turned to walk away again, but in this instance, it felt more final. It was why Levi threw his hand out toward her as if it had any power to halt her from such a distance. “Now you stop right there,” he ground out, masking his misery with a roughness. “You can’t just leave after the shit you’ve said. So where the hell do you think you’re going?”

She paused, providing truth in her earlier statement by keeping her eyes trained on one of the pristinely cleaned tiles. “I’m going to say goodbye to Eren then going to my mom’s house. And if he’s not attached to you by the time I get back, then you can set up a new living arrangement with her.”

#levi ackerman imagines #levi akerman imagine #attack on titan imagines #attack on titan imagine #levi aot #levi ackerman au #attack on titan au #levi ackerman fic #snk imagine #snk imagines #snk au #snk fic #levi x reader #levi x fem!reader #aot headcanon #aot headcanons #snk headcanon #snk headcanons #levi ackerman headcanon #levi ackerman headcanons

[anagentinwriting]

Lifeline - Part 15

Summary: (First Responders!AU) Moving to Los Angeles and living with your brother, Thor, was never part of your plan nor was being a 9-1-1 dispatcher, but plans change when you are faced with your own emergencies. In your case, it was leaving behind a relationship that wasn’t as perfect as it seemed. Will this be the fresh start you were hoping for or will your past find a way to catch up with you?

Pairing: Steve Rogers x Odinson!Sister Reader

Word Count: 4800+

Warnings: Fluff, angst, language, fighting

Lifeline Masterlist / Main Masterlist

“Okay, girl. Let’s move onto your two-three combo, and then you are going to come at me with a right hook as if it was your ex’s face,” Val instructed, holding up her mitts.

You dropped your hands, looking at her. “I’m not doing this because I want to kick his abusive ass. I am doing this for me. To build up my confidence and get stronger.”

“Yeah, yeah. You just want to look good naked for Rogers.” She wiggled her eyebrows, and you started punching the mitts. “Thata girl, I knew I could hit a nerve,” she chuckled to herself. 

You completed a few more rounds, then Val decided it was time for a cool down. You nodded, breathing heavy, and stepped out of the ring. You wiped the sweat from your brow with your forearm while Val came over to help get you out of the gloves. 

“You’re killing it, YN. Like, if someone ever decided to jump you, well, I think they would lose a hand.”

You chuckled at Val’s compliment. “Thanks, I do feel more confident in my movements, and my punches feel like they have more power behind them.”

“They do,” she agreed, “but it’s not hard enough to make me need to ice my hands or anything, like some of the coaches have to do when M’Baku is practicing.” She raised her eyebrows, shaking her head. “Men always have to be the strongest, but they’re not always the smartest.” She let out an annoyed sigh, rolling her eyes. “How are things with Rogers?”

You smiled as she started to untie your other glove. “He’s good. I think we’re good. Why, what’s the gossip at the station?”

“There’s not much. He tends to keep to himself about you, but there are times when he does get all flustered, blushy, and red when we pick on him about you. It’s cute,” Val smirked, eyeing you over, feeling yourself have the same reaction as him. “Have you two kindled the flame yet?” She wiggled her eyebrows, making your face heat up even more. 

“Wouldn’t you like to know,” you chuckled, shaking your head. 

“Don’t tell me then,” she winked. “When Carol and I talk about you two, we think you two look good together, and from what you both have been through, you both deserve a win, and I’m happy you two found each other.”

You smiled, undoing the hand wraps. “Thanks, Val. Speaking of Carol--” you peeked up at her, watching her closely “--how are things? Have you told the crew yet?”

“Not yet, but I am sure most of them already suspect something is going on?” Val shrugged, taking a sip out of her water bottle. 

“I wouldn’t be so sure. I mean, they’re men,” you chuckled, rotating your wrists back and forth.

“Good point,” she laughed, tilting her water bottle at you. “They can be a little slower at picking up hints.”

____________

You sat on the couch folding laundry, following a developing armed robbery happening downtown at the Ideal Federal Saving Bank. 

“Christine, how are things looking there? Have any of the robbers been identified?” Megan Henderson asked from the KTLA studio to Christine Everheart at the scene. 

“Yes, Megan. We know two of the assailants at this time, Jack Rollins and Jasper Sitwell. They are two notorious criminals who have been involved in numerous robberies throughout the state of California, Nevada, and Arizona. We are still unsure about the three other associates assisting with this robbery at this time…”

The monitor by the front door started buzzing, pulling you away from the screen to see who was there. You smiled at the screen, seeing Thor waving at the camera with his hands full of groceries, and you buzzed him in. 

You walked over to grab the remote, seeing the film crew circling the bank in a helicopter, and switched off the tv. You would need Thor's full attention when he helps you make your mom's chocolate chip cookies for fire safety at the station tomorrow. 

“Sister, I come bearing gifts,” Thor shouted, somehow being able to open the front door with his hands full. “And did you see that robbery hostage situation--” he pointed in the direction to downtown LA “--Nat and Clint have their hands full with this one.”

“Yeah, they do,” you agreed, leading Thor to the kitchen to drop off the bags on the counter. You furrowed your brows at the multiple bags of groceries. “What did you all get? All I needed was flour, chocolate chips, and eggs.”

“They were having a sale, and I couldn’t resist.” He lifted up a six-pack of beer, smiling like a child on their birthday.

“Well, that’s not going to take you long to finish,” you smirked at him, pulling groceries from the bags.

“No, I got this for us to drink while we bake mom’s cookies,” Thor added with a sincere smile, scratching his beard. “You know brother-sister bonding. I also grabbed snacks, so we are less tempted to eat all the cookies.” 

You grinned, staring at him in awe. “Sounds like fun, let’s get these cookies started.”

“And I’ll open a beer for you and supervise,” Thor added, going into the drawer to get the bottle opener, and you narrowed your eyes at him.

___________

“Are you sure you’re doing it right?” Thor watched over your shoulders while you started creaming the butter and sugar together. “I don’t remember mom using one of these fancy mixers. She did it with one of those hand mixer thingies.”

“It just makes it go quicker,” you replied, rolling your eyes. “And you can do a bigger batch.”

“They’re not going to taste the same.”

“This is how I’ve always made them. You have literally watched me make these cookies with this machine before.”

“Oh well, I noticed they tasted different.”

“You’re insufferable, Thor,” you stated, turning around and pushing him to the other side of the counter. He laughed, taking a seat on the stool across from you.  “Do you want to find my cookie scoop? You’re scooping once I have everything mixed.”

“Finnneee,” he dragged out, complaining. He went over to the drawer and pulled out the scoop, and returned to the stool. “How have things been going with Steve?”

“It’s been fun,” you smiled, adding the eggs to the mixer bowl and turning it on.

“I’m glad. I’m the one who told Steve he could date you.”

“Wait,” you narrowed your eyes at him, “did he ask for permission?”

“No, I just told him that if I had to choose someone from the station to date you, I’d pick him.”

“Oooooh, so you picked him for me?” You scoffed, eyeing him while you added the dries in a little at a time.

“No, no, nothing like that. You can make your own decisions, but you’re a good person, and I wanted you to be with a good man. Besides, Steve is an old fashion guy, and with Dad not around anymore to ask, I figured I was the next best choice since I am the eldest.”

“And Loki was okay with your decision.” You scraped the bowl, adding in the chocolate chips and turning the mixer back on. 

“Well...I didn't ask him per se, but I think he would agree with me on this,” Thor stated, taking a sip of his beer.

“But, when have either of you agreed on anything...ever?” You turned off the machine, taking the bowl off, and started scraping the dough off the paddle. “Besides, you know I can make my own decisions right. I’m an adult.”

“Yes, of course,” he chuckled, playing around with the cookie scoop until it flew out of his hand and skimmed across the kitchen island. “Of course.” He nodded. 

“Says the man child, playing with a cookie scoop,” you snorted, shaking your head.

The last batch of cookies was in the oven, and the rest were cooling on sheets of newspaper. It wasn’t uncommon for you to get a few stares when you made cookies with an audience, but every time you made them with your mom, she’d use a spatula to get them off the pan and then place them on newspaper. You didn’t want to break that little tradition you got from her. 

Thor plopped down on a stool at your small island. “Why did I have to scoop them all?” Thor asked, taking a sip of his beer. 

“They’re for your job, I’m not going to do all the work,” you sassed, shaking your head, forcing him to crack a side smile. “Now you wash, and I’ll dry.”

“Do I have to? I just sat down,” he asked with a slight frown.

“Yes,” you stated as he groaned, standing up and making his way to the sink. 

He let out a loud sigh, turning on the faucet, and narrowing his eyes in your direction. You stuck out your tongue at him while you continued to put ingredients away. He sighed loudly again, and you gave him the side-eye as he leaned against the counter, watching the suds magically appear in the water. “I’m happy for you.”

“Okay?” You replied more in a question than a statement. You narrowed your eyes at him, not knowing where that came from. 

“It’s nice to see you smiling and having fun again. You know, putting yourself out there. It’s nice having the sister I grew up with back. I’ve missed her.” He stood up straight, cracking a child-like smile at you. 

“Me too,” you smirked, leaning against the counter. 

He turned back to the sink, placing a few dishes in, and started washing them before placing them on the drying rack. It was weird to watch him do civilized things because he never did them when he was younger. When he left New York, the annoying older brother you grew up with started taking responsibility for his actions. While most actions not involving his nightly escapades. You take a sip of your beer, grabbing a clean cloth to dry, and start putting the dishes away. 

“I filed for divorce yesterday,” you mentioned, hearing Thor drop what he was washing into the sink.

He placed his hands on the edge of the sink, clenching his jaw at the sudsy sink. 

“He’s going to know where you are. Are you okay with taking that risk?” He inquired, scratching at the short beard on his face, turning to you.

“I know it’s a risk, but the only way I am ever gonna feel free of him…is to be free of him.”

He nodded, clearing his throat. “Are you going to feel safe here? Cause I can take the couch and stay for a few days. I can take work off and…”

“Thor, Thor,” you interrupted, placing your hand on his upper arm. “I’ll be okay.”

“I know, I just… I want… I want to make sure you’re safe.” 

“I know, and I will be,” you smiled at him, giving his arm a reassuring squeeze.

“Is Steve gonna come and stay with you?” 

“I don’t know, maybe.” You shrugged, keeping a close eye on your brother; his bottom lip trembled as his eyes darted in all directions. “Is everything alright?”

He nodded his head aggressively. “Yeah, I’m fine. Totally fine,” he stated in a high-pitched voice, laughing it off.  “But um…I think it would be better if someone stayed here with you, so I know… so we--we all know you’re safe,” he stumbled over his words, wringing his hands together. “Have you at least talked to Loki? What does he think? Does he want me to stay with you?” He asked, rambling on in one breath. 

“I was going to call him tonight and let him know,” you informed softly, trying to calm him down. “Thor--” his worried-filled eyes connected with yours “--I’ll be okay. Okay?” You gave him a reassuring nod. “I know after what happened before...that you blame yourself or you feel like you failed, but you didn’t. I don’t blame you for what happened because it wasn’t any of your doing. I put myself in that situation, and I continued to go back.”

“But, I could have gotten you out of that situation. I am the eldest, and I should’ve done a better job at protecting you, or at the very least, listening to you. I shouldn’t have taken Billy’s side, and for that, I blame myself,” he sniffled, clearing his throat. 

“Thor--” you rubbed his arm, making him look at you “--Billy is and will always be a master manipulator. We all fell for it…”

“Loki didn’t. He saw right through the man,” Thor tried to reason, raising his eyebrows. 

“But he didn’t stop me from going back to Billy. I mean, he tried, but Billy already had me wrapped around his finger.” You paused, biting your lip. “There is no sense in playing the blame game when the only person we should be blaming is Billy.” Thor opened his mouth to say something, but you continued. “You’ve helped me more these last few months than you will ever realize. Don’t think about the past and how you could’ve helped me, but think about right now, and how you did help me. I still don’t know how to thank you for it.”

“You can thank me by letting someone stay with you for a couple of weeks.”

“Wow...we’re still on that,” you scoffed, forcing a trembling chuckle out of him. “I know open communication was never our family's forte, but I love you, brother.”

“Love you, too, sis,” he smiled, leaning towards you and pulling you into a hug. 

___________

You walked into the station through the open garage doors, noticing the spotless, shiny red trucks glistening in the sun, bringing a sense of ease over you and a smile to your face. This place felt like a second home that came with a family that you didn’t know you needed. You spotted Steve helping a few guys set up chairs in front of a portable tv while others set up tables for interactive activities for the kids to participate in. There were even goody bags with plastic red firemen hats and the treat table that continued to grow. 

“YN, I see you got talked into making something, too?” You looked over to see Nat, holding a pan of brownies, and you lifted your two containers of cookies. “I swear these boys wouldn't survive without us. I mean, Val and Carol would be safe, but the boys.” She shot you a tight smile, shaking her head. 

“Agreed,” you chuckled.

“And there is my nerd now, I’ll be back,” she winked, walking over to Bucky. She handed him the brownies, and he leaned down and kissed her ever so gently. 

“It’s disgusting, isn't it?” You looked to your right to see Sam with his arms crossed, rolling his eyes. 

“I think it’s kind of sweet,” You chuckled, rubbing your lips together and glancing at them one more time. Steve caught your eye, and a sweet smile broke across his face. “You’ll find someone, Sam. You’re such a catch.”

“Uh-huh,” he grunted.

“Would some cookies help?” You offered, handing him the containers. 

“Yes.” Sam grinned his gap-tooth smile, taking the container. “Thank you, YN. This is why you’re my favorite.” He took a bite out of one of the cookies, walking away, holding it up in the air. “The best batch yet.” 

Steve shook his head at a grinning Sam, walking over to you, and pulled you into a hug. You giggled into his chest, wrapping your arms around your waist, and he started swaying back and forth. You rested your chin on his chest, staring up at him. He leaned down, giving you a quick peck on the lips. 

“How did Bucky and Steve get girls like that?” Sam asked Val at the treat table.

“I guess some people just get lucky.” Val shrugged, and Sam angrily took a bite out of another cookie.  

“Want some ice cream?”

“Yes, I want all the ice cream,” Sam added, following Val to the break room. 

“Question--” Steve stopped swaying and pulled away from you “--do you have any plans for tonight?” 

“No, why do you have something planned,” he teased, shooting you his signature smirk.

“Maybe.”

“What are we doing?”

“I’m afraid that is classified, but I have something for you.” You reached into your purse, pulling out a manila folder, handing it to him. 

Steve narrowed his eyes in curiosity. He opened the folder, his eyes scanning it over. “Divorce papers. This is a big step, YN,” He smiled at you, but it quickly dropped to concern. “Billy is going to know where you are.”

“I know, but I feel like it is time to put the past behind me and move on with my life.”

“Okay, as long as you’re ready, then I’m here for you with whatever you need.” 

“I know,” you smiled shyly.

“Isn’t it amazing?” Thor clasped a hand on Steve’s shoulder. 

“Yeah, I’m proud of her,” Steve winked, making your smile spread wider.

“As am I,” Thor smiled, squeezing Steve’s shoulder. 

You shake your head at them. “I better get to my shift, but Sam has the cookies, and I want my containers back ASAP, or I am going to hurt you, Thor.” You stated, walking backwards.

“I’ll make sure they are in your possession tonight.” Thor saluted, making you shake your head.

“Have a good shift, YN. I’ll see you tonight.”

“Just know this, Steve, if you hurt my little sister, we will have more than words,” Thor stated, squeezing Steve’s shoulder a little harder watching you walk out of the station with Nat by your side.

Steve nodded, turning to him. “I don’t intend to.”

“Good man.” Thor patted him on the shoulder, giving him a closed-mouth smile. “Before she met you, she was lost in her own little world. Fighting the beast, invading her dreams, and trying to tackle her own troubles. She thought she could only rely on herself to make the important choices but soon realized she had supporters, like you and me. So, thank you, Steve, for helping bring my sister back.” 

Steve nodded to Thor as the tall man went back to help the group set up.

“Did he threaten you?” Bucky asked with a breathy laugh, coming over to him.

“Ahh…yeah…sort of….I think.” Steve's eyebrows knit together, trying to figure out what exactly just happened. “But, I’m gonna make a quick call.”

“Do your thing, pal?” Bucky patted him on the shoulder and went over to help the group finish up.

Steve took out his phone until he found the name he was looking for; He brought it to his ear as soon as it started to ring. 

“Hey, Steve. How’s it going?”

“I’m good. Listen, I’m not going to be able to play pool tonight. I got a...I  got a date,” Steve smiled at his own words, scratching at his beard.

“Oh, is this the one you have been kind of seeing?”

“Yeah, YN.”

“Good for you, man.”

“Thanks, but I gotta get back to work. I’ll see you later.”

“I have a feeling we’ll see each other soon. Have a good night, Steve.”

“Bye, Jig,” Steve smiled, sliding the phone back into his pocket, and headed over to finish getting everything ready for fire safety.  

__________

The team stood by one of the open garage doors in anticipation for the first group of young students and their teachers to arrive. The workout room was transformed into a small teaching area, complete with fold-out chairs and a roll-away tv. Snacks and goody bags were also waiting for them with a welcoming banner hanging from the second-story loft. 

Steve let out a deep breath with his hands on his hips, eyeing at what they were able to accomplish.  It looked very welcoming, but he didn’t know what was going to happen. He liked kids but wasn’t always great at talking to them, but Carol reassured them that the first group of students might not go as planned, but they had another six to make up for it. 

“First group approaching,” Sam shouted, going over to the door to greet them. Sam shook the teacher's hand, flashing her his famous gap-tooth smile. 

Bucky scoffed beside Steve, gripping his shoulder. “Don’t be nervous, pal. Just avoid swearing or talking about anything too scary. Kids think we are badasses, and they look up to us. We are heroes to them.”

Steve swallowed, nodding at him. He rubbed his hands together, taking in the twenty little kids, grabbing snacks, and taking their seats while Carol stood in front of them with a huge smile.

“How’s everyone doing today?” Carol asked, earning a group of students shouting while others remained silent. “I’m glad to hear it. My name is Captain Carol Danvers, but you can call me Ace, and I am in charge of Station 107. Those wearing the dark blue shirts around you are my teammates.” She pointed to Sam, who then introduced himself as they went around the room. “Now that you know my team, what are your names?”

The teachers introduced themselves before the kids went around the room saying their names. Steve stood off to the side, nodding his head, trying to remember every kid’s name. His eyes stopped on one familiar little girl, Morgan Stark. She caught his eye, and she waved with an exciting smile on her face. He nodded at her, mimicking her expression on his face. Steve noticed she also waved at Sam. Seeing her brought back the memory of his first encounter with YN and losing his dispatcher cherry while saving Morgan from the electrified pool in the process. 

“Do any of you know the number to call in case someone needs help?” Danvers asked, bringing Steve's attention back to the present. Hands flew into the air, including Morgans. Danvers pointed to one of the students, and he replied with 911. 

Steve zoned out as Danvers continued to talk with the young kids. His eyes traveled around the room, noticing how some of the teachers would catch his eye but then quickly look away. He smirked, realizing Thor and YN weren’t kidding when they said the teachers would flirt with them. Thor winked at one of them, and she blushed, unable to keep the smile off her face. Steve shook his head at them, returning his attention to Danvers.

“....when you dial 911, your call gets directed to a dispatcher, and they use a system called CAD, which is a computer-aided dispatch. They punch the address you give them in, and the dispatcher can figure out what unit is closest for them to send help. Now, how many of you know your address?” A few hands shot up, and Carol nodded. “It’s okay if you don’t just go home and talk to your parents about it. They love to watch you learn and would be more than willing to help.” She nodded, clasping her hands together. “We are going to watch a quick safety video and then break off into groups and do a few different activities and see some cool things. How’s that sound?” She got a few cheers from the students while the others kept quiet. Danvers smiled, switching the tv on and pushing play on the DVD player, before stepping off to the side. 

The kids broke off into four smaller groups; Bucky and Steve took their group around, showing them different trucks, and explained their purpose. Steve couldn’t help but smile when the kids’ faces brightened up upon seeing the inside of the trucks. They did their best to explain what some of the equipment inside was, but most of the kids seemed too excited to listen. According to Bucky, kids like seeing the trucks and could care less about the other activities they had set up.

The first group's time was coming to an end, and the team could see the next class approaching in the distance. The team handed out gift bags, and all the kids were smiling and putting on their red plastic hats. The teachers told the students to say thank you, and they did so in unison before they retreated towards the door.

Steve stood by the entrance waving goodbye to the previous class, awaiting to greet the next class. He felt a tug on his pants, and he looked down to see Morgan smiling up at him.

“Hey, shouldn’t you be up there with your partner?” He leaned down to her eye level, resting a knee on the ground.

“She is waiting,” she pointed to her, and Steve smirked, seeing her waiting impatiently. “Besides, my teacher is still talking to the tall one.”

He glanced over to see the tall one was Thor, and he was doing the thing he always did. “Look at that, you’re right.” He nodded. “What can I do for you, Morgan?”

“I wanted to give you this--” she handed him a homemade card “--the tall one helped me make it at the coloring table.” She rocked back and forth on her feet and blushed.

“Aww, thank you.” He opened the card, reading: Thank you, Fireman Steve, for saving me, and it was an image of her in a pool with him on one side and Sam was on the other. “You’re welcome. I like it. You are quite the artist.”

She smiled. “I gave one to Fireman Sam, too.” She pointed at him with a smile.

“I’m sure he loved it, too.” Steve smiled at it. “I'm going to have to put this on my fridge at home.” He chuckled, and in an instance, the little girl wrapped her little arms around her neck and pulled him close. He patted her on the back and pulled away. “Stay out of trouble, and don’t get into any more electrified pools.” 

She shot him a funny look. “You too,” she smiled, running over to her partner.

Her teacher passed by him, folding a piece of paper and sliding it into her pocket, which Steve could only assume to be Thor's number. He shook his head, looking back at Thor to see him staring at her retreating figure. 

Thor caught Steve's eye, and he shrugged. “What? I like women, but you know, not in a creepy way.”

After the first class came through, the rest of the groups were easy; having got the lay-of-the-land and knowing what to say. Although towards the end of the day, the older kids, the 2nd graders, asked more daring questions, in which Steve tried to keep it G or PG.

“And with that, class is dismissed,” Danvers stated, plopping down in one of the fold-up chairs, sighing loudly. 

“Hear, hear,” Sam nodded, plopping down next to her. “It’s the repetition that gets me. I could go home and fall asleep right now. Who knew kids could be so exhausting. I praise the teachers cause I know I couldn’t put up with their shit all the time.” Everyone murmured in agreement.

“How are you all tired?” Thor asked with his hands on his hips.

“We weren’t at the coloring station. We were explaining and answering questions trying to keep things kid-friendly.”

“Well, you should’ve been. In my opinion, it’s the best station.”

“No, the trucks are, the arts and crafts station is the boring table. The kids were talking about it,” Bucky added, folding up a few chairs. 

“Doesn’t matter, I got a few numbers. And...” he walked over to the snack table, taking the last of YN cookies “--I got the last cookie,” he chuckled, taking a bite.

“Let’s quit complaining about what activity was better and remember it was about teaching the kids,” Danvers stated. “Now, let’s get this cleaned up, so the crew can do their job tonight.” Everyone mumbled, nodding in agreement. 

Thor snapped the container to your Tupperware shut, shoving the last bite of cookie in his mouth. “I could drop off the Tupperware tonight if you’d like. I’m meeting up with her after her shift,” Steve offered, packing up the leftover snacks. 

“Yes, I suppose you could, but if they go missing and she doesn’t get them. This all comes back to me, and I don’t need that on my conscience right now.” 

“Probably a good idea you do it then,” Steve chuckled. 

____________

Standing in front of the mirror, you try to get your hair to do a thing, but it isn’t doing the thing, so you decide to leave it as is. A buzzing sound at the front door brings an excited smile to your face. You trotted down the stairs, seeing Steve and Cosmo at the gate. You buzzed them in and went into the kitchen to grab two wine glasses and a bottle from your stash. You set them on the kitchen island, hearing Cosmo barking on the other side of the door. You smirked to yourself, walking over to the front door, remembering Steve mentioning how much Cosmo missed you. It was utter nonsense, but you couldn’t help but smile. You opened the front door, and your smile quickly disappeared.

“Billy.”

“Hi, honey. Did you miss me?”

_________

AN: Thanks for reading part 15! Those pesky cliffhangers! Where did Billy come from? Has he been watching her this whole time? Hmmmm....any theories?! And of course, all of this had to happen when things between her and Steve were finally going forward. It's almost like I planned it! Muwahaha! And speaking of Steve...what could’ve happened to him and Cosmo? Besides the ending, did you like Thor and her little chitchat, the brother-sister bonding sesh. We did learn that Thor clearly still blames himself for what happened way back then, but maybe now after their little chat, he will finally start forgiving himself, but who knows with the current revelation happening! 😬 And Val and Carol, did anyone guess that happening?! Also, did you enjoy fire safety day?! I thought it would be a good throwback to the first chapter and bring Morgan back, and I thought it would just be cute seeing the team trying to keep things G/PG when talking about their job. Haha! Better prepare yourself for the next couple chapters, cause things are going get deep! As always thanks for reading, comments always welcome! 

#steve rogers #steve rogers x reader #steve rogers au #steve rogers x female reader #marvel #mavel fanfic #marvel fanfiction #marvel au #firefighter!steve #firefighter!bucky #firefighter au #steve rogers series #captain america #captain america x reader #chris evans #chris evans fanfiction #avengers #avengers au #avengers fanfiction #first responder au #steve rogers fanfic #steve rogers fanfiction

[fluffyk97]

Basic backstories, setup and just few little things about Werewolf Cole Au. A synopsis if you will?

There's no elemental powers, Overlord, Zane isn't a nindroid, etc. Just basically a regular world with small real myths such as Werewolves.

Werewolf wolf forms aren't humanoid, but really are just big 6ft tall wolves.

Kai and Nya do live in a house near the woods and their parents were never kidnapped so they were raised by them. However they both are in a line of work that has them not home most of the time.

Kai & Nya found Lloyd on the streets being bullied from other kids. Kai immediately couldn't stand it and stepped in. When asked where Lloyd lived so they could take him, Lloyd said he didn't have one.

After a long video call later, and a quick visit by Maya, Lloyd was able to be adopted into their family and enroll in school under the name Lloyd Smith.

Kai is 20, Nya is 18, Lloyd is 14, Cole is 21, Jay is 18, Zane is 23, Pixal is 22, Skylor is 21. Excluding Cole till later, they're just a big friend group.

Kai is trying to find a good College to get into while working at Skylor and her Mother's small Noodle Shop. There is no Chen because I said so.

Skylor and Kai used to date in Highschool, but found to be better friends instead and now are just close friends.

Jay & Nya are in highschool Senior Year, and are together.

Zane & Pixal was friends with them in highschool, but now are in College together. Also a couple, and they love to visit when they can and video chat.

Lloyd is in Middle School. He's managed to make few friends there but his best friends are his adopted siblings, their friends, and his adopted cat, Meowthra.

Cole was childhood friends with Jay back in another town until one day him, his father and mother had to suddenly move out without a word to anyone. So to Jay, his childhood friend just one day disappeared.

There are Werewolf Hunters after them.

Cole gets his wolf side from Lily.

Lily doesn't pass away when he was younger, but is sick. Lou moves them to the Town where the gang are, hearing about how it's nice and close to some woods, good clean air, and he did some digging and saw nothing about Hunters being in the town because the Forest and its wildlife are supposed to be protected.

Cole is trying to figure out what to do for his mother and always goes out to the woods at night to let himself be a wolf, especially because he doesn't have complete control of his transformation like Lily.

Unfortunately Hunters did follow them.

The Hunters one day went to eat at the Noodle Shop and talked about going hunting in the Woods. Kai overheard, and he knows the Woods are not to be hunted in. Kai tried leaving a voicemail to Skylor but his phone unfortunately died mid message. He wasn't sneaky enough about it and the Hunters did notice.

At the end of his shift, locking up the Noodle Shop, Kai is jumped by the Hunters so they don't have a goody goody try and ruin their hunt.

Kai managed to get away and did run off into the woods, hoping to lead them off his tail, not find their way to his house, while also hoping to manage to get home through the woods.

Kai of course loses the Hunters, but unfortunately his ankle did get sprained pretty bad and he stops to sit against a tree once he's sure he's safe.

That's when Cole finds him after smelling some of his blood.

Kai never heard of any reports of wolves in the woods, especially none that are 6ft tall. So understandably, Kai freezes up in fear while also knowing he wouldn't get anywhere if he tried.

Cole approaches, luckily just have hunted something himself so Kai's blood doesn't affect his hunter instincts too much.

Cole slowly approaches Kai before licking his wounds. He turns Kai around and grabs him by the back of his jacket, carrying him off to his little den he set up for when he's out in the woods.

Kai freaks out and is about to yell before he hears the distant sound of a Jeep driving through the woods which leads him to shut up in fear its the hunters.

This also has Cole rush to the den.

The den is set up with a large bedroll, campfire and few other necessities because Cole goes to it when he's a human as well. It surprises Kai, but he doesn't complain when the big wolf sets him down and carries over a first aid kit.

Even after patching himself up, Kai still can't get up, but it seems the Wolf in front of him basically saved him and maybe has an owner. Plus, out of fear of running into the hunters, he decides okay he'll stay for the night.

Cole does notice Kai starts shivering when trying to sleep, so he goes over to offer some warmth. Kai while uneasy with a big wolf next to him, accepts it, not wanting to risk going against it and it is nice.

This leads to both of them falling asleep and Cole completely forgetting he's going to change back in the morning.

So Kai wakes up being hugged by this large shirtless man. His screaming wakes Cole up, leading him to screaming as well as the scramble to get apart.

The den is surprisingly close to Kai's house, so as Nya is about to head out on her bike to find out why Kai didn't come home last night, she hears him screaming in the woods.

After the screaming stops, Kai and Cole stare at each other. Kai in complete bewilderment, glancing around for that wolf from last night unaware it was Cole. Cole meanwhile is frozen, slapping himself mentally for some reason helping this random stranger as a wolf and not thinking about him turning back in the morning.

Nya calls out for Kai though, drawing his attention away from Cole and allowing him a moment to slip away.

Kai after realizing he was left alone, decides to get up, limping out of the den to call out to Nya.

Kai is brought home and his wounds are more properly treated. A call to Skylor to look out for the guys that jumped Kai and to let her know what's up.

Kai tells the story about the Wolf. Lloyd gets excited wanting to find a big nice Wolf himself, but Nya quickly dismisses it to it most likely just being a dream passing out in the woods. Hoping to delude Lloyd from going and searching the woods for said Wolf, while also not believing it herself.

Kai is basically forced to stay home till they know the Hunters aren't going to go after him again, and to heal up his ankle.

Kai keeps thinking about that night while during his little house arrest, and even dreams of the man he woke up next to, turning into the 6ft Wolf that helped him.

One night when he's okay to walk again and Nya is at Jay's house with Lloyd to help him study, and for a little sleepover, Kai sneaks out back to the woods, finding the den again and hopes to come across the Wolf again.

Cole wanders in as a wolf and freezes noticing Kai waiting for him. He was no different from Kai, constantly thinking about the other in numerous ways since their encounter.

Cole unfortunately wasn't so prepared for another meeting and turns to run away, but finds himself freezing when Kai cries out "Wait!"

Kai slowly approaches Cole.

"You can understand me, can't you?" Cole looks Kai in the eyes and nods to Kai's slight surprise.

"Are you that guy I woke up next to?" Cole whines in response, in fear of Kai knowing.

"It's okay! I... well its little weird to think about, but... wow I was actually right? Haha, I don't know how to feel about this, but I won't go ratting you out don't worry!" Cole's ears perk up in surprise.

That's when the familiar sound of a Jeep reaches both their ears. Smelling the air, Cole whines, recognizing the smell of Hunters, moving to turn and run again, but Kai stops him again.

Kai offers and brings Cole back to his house to help hide him. Cole feels like he should reject, and not trust so easily, but he finds himself following Kai easily.

That's when Kai walks in with Cole, ducking through the back door and see Nya and Lloyd who just got home because the sleep over got cancelled.

After a lot of panic and explaining later, Nya agrees to help out Cole, wanting more explaining from him if Kai saying him turning into a human is true.

Lloyd is very excited to see such a big wolf and starts talking to Cole a lot. It surprises Cole, but he also finds it enjoyable to see a kid so excited to actually see him like this after growing up and being told by Lou he should never show his secret to anyone.

Lloyd does bring Meowthra to Cole, and while Kai and Nya were expecting the usual Cat vs Dog or this case, Wolf, Meowthra surprisingly really likes Cole and they get along fine.

Lloyd helps Kai give food to Cole once they hear the wolf's tummy growl.

The next morning, Cole wakes up in the living room as human and he does explain what he is. Pleading for the trio of siblings to not say anything, especially after he smelled Hunters and learned they're the ones who hurt Kai. They of course agree to the promise.

This starts the cycle of Cole coming over some nights as a Wolf and staying the night.

Cole is excited to talk to people again after being on the run and being hidden for so long and a nice distraction from worrying about his mother.

Kai finds himself wanting to spend more and more time with Cole until he realizes he's actually falling in love with a werewolf.

Overtime the rest of the friend group also accidentally learn about Cole but agree to keep the secret. Jay especially being really happy to see his childhood friend again and getting an explanation why he disappeared so long ago.

Kai find himself talking a lot about Cole to his siblings and Skylor. Cole does the same to Jay about Kai.

Of course they do confess at some point. Or basically forced to by everyone.

Cole keeps all this a secret from Lou because his father has grown to always have a constant worry of his son and wife being hurt because their Wolf sides. He talks to Lily about everyone though when he thinks she's asleep, but she does hear it all and is happy to hear her son is happy. She doesn't tell Lou until Cole is ready.

Cole is a clingly bf when him and Kai are together, being very touch starved from only having his mom & dad for so long. Kai loves attention, so it works out perfectly.

Cole as a wolf will sometimes just pick up Kai to bring him t lay down with and enjoy cuddles. When human, he loves to come up from behind for a hug.

Kai brought Cole to work one day and Cole fell in love with the food there ofc.

When Cole first ate cake around the others, he was a wolf and they did immediately get scared with mindset of chocolate bad for dogs. Morning came and Cole reassured he was fine and is still okay to eat anything he can as a human, as a wolf.

Cole does still struggle with gaining control of his transformation but that mainly affects to him turning into a wolf every night. Lily can turn into a wolf anytime she wants.

However sometimes Cole finds himself losing to his wolf instincts and needs to hunt or gets hostile.

First time Cole loses himself as a wolf he is hostile, but Kai slowly approaches him, treating it like he would for Lloyd when he has panic attacks, and brings Cole out of it. Mostly succeeding to get close because Cole smells his own scent on Kai.

They all do try and pitch in to find a way to help Lily, and stop the Hunters.

#ninjago #ninjago au #werewolf cole #Lavashipping #kai smith #cole brookstone #long post #nya smith #lloyd garmadon #jay walker #zane julien #skylor chen #pixal borg #This ended up being a lot more than i was thinking of writing down #But hey #I say I love this au #werewolf Cole au