#and do whatever i want

[lila-rae]

I always know antis are big mad when I start getting personal attacks. (Alexa play Obsessed by Mariah Carey)

Like I give a shit what some random on the internet says about me

#meanwhile I’m going to continue to live my best life #and do whatever i want

[sarasa-cat]

2022 has been such a nonstop clusterfuck of unexpected bad.

Starting Tuesday afternoon, the rest of November is Self Care Indulgence November for me.

I really need it

Bc 😩

#the rest of the month is just me & the cat boys #literally cats #and I’m just gonna chill #and do whatever I want

[edwardslostalchemy]

I dreamt my mom got me a puppy and I woke up in my dream to this box with the sleeping puppy in it and I was like 😭💖. But when I opened it, the puppy woke up and started running in my room so I lost it!!! In my room;!! I was like ??? Where??? This thing is tiny, where did it go oh no!!! It was called a meerkat dog?? It was small and cute and it scampered everywhere. I also dreamt I went to work? And?? I had apparently had sex with this cute coworker??? And i wasn't pregnant or anything, but i had a baby i was taking care of who was super smart and was helping me cheat the system by scamming banks with different identities. My friend had me adopt this baby, who looked a lot like my coworker and i was like aldkfnflla??? Idk. I got caught because of course i would and then i had to go work at a restaurant, so i took my puppy who would run around and the guests were delighted. But i got home and the guy i like was there??? And we were making dinner together but i was like. Hypoglycemic and i needed juice so i started looking for it and he was too until he handed me this really weird juice that i downed, but i FAINTED, and then i woke up for real. And this is convincing me that my dreams are like a parallel world where I wake up in this world after passing out in dream world and when i fall asleep in this world, i get activated in dream world. Dream world Fran has no inhibitions, she does whatever she wants woah lol.

#fran talks #dream world lets me be free to go wherever i want #and do whatever i want #and whoever i want maybe 😂

[inkskinned]

because sometimes there are invisible tests and invisible rules and you're just supposed to ... know the rule. someone you thought of as a friend asks you for book recommendations, so you give her a list of like 30 books, each with a brief blurb and why you like it. later, you find out she screenshotted the list and send it out to a group chat with the note: what an absolute freak can you believe this. you saw the responses: emojis where people are rolling over laughing. too much and obsessive and actually kind of creepy in the comments. you thought you'd been doing the right thing. she'd asked, right? an invisible rule: this is what happens when you get too excited.

you aren't supposed to laugh at your own jokes, so you don't, but then you're too serious. you're not supposed to be too loud, but then people say you're too quiet. you aren't supposed to get passionate about things, but then you're shy, boring. you aren't supposed to talk too much, but then people are mad when you're not good at replying.

you fold yourself into a prettier paper crane. since you never know what is "selfish" and what is "charity," you give yourself over, fully. you'd rather be empty and over-generous - you'd rather eat your own boundaries than have even one person believe that you're mean. since you don't know what the thing is that will make them hate you, you simply scrub yourself clean of any form of roughness. if you are perfect and smiling and funny, they can love you. if you are always there for them and never admit what's happening and never mention your past and never make them uncomfortable - you can make up for it. you can earn it.

don't fuck up. they're all testing you, always. they're tolerating you. whatever secret club happened, over a summer somewhere - during some activity you didn't get to attend - everyone else just... figured it out. like they got some kind of award or examination that allowed them to know how-to-be-normal. how to fit. and for the rest of your life, you've been playing catch-up. you've been trying to prove that - haha! you get it! that the joke they're telling, the people they are, the manual they got- yeah, you've totally read it.

if you can just divide yourself in two - the lovable one, and the one that is you - you can do this. you can walk the line. they can laugh and accept you. if you are always-balanced, never burdensome, a delight to have in class, champagne and glittering and never gawky or florescent or god-forbid cringe: you can get away with it.

you stare at your therapist, whom you can make jokes with, and who laughs at your jokes, because you are so fucking good at people-pleasing. you smile at her, and she asks you how you're doing, and you automatically say i'm good, thanks, how are you? while the answer swims somewhere in your little lizard brain:

how long have you been doing this now? mastering the art of your body and mind like you're piloting a puppet. has it worked? what do you mean that all you feel is... just exhausted. pick yourself up, the tightrope has no net. after all, you're cheating, somehow, but nobody seems to know you actually flunked the test. it's working!

aren't you happy yet?

#almost wrote the champagne line as ''effervescent'' but legit could not write it without saying ''effervescent like a snail'' #ah tumblr... #writeblr #warm up #idk . having trouble writing rn #ps i don't like to talk about it . it is my medical information. but before you ask. yes this is about being on the spectrum #i really don't like when ppl make my writing about how im [whatever ID]. i want it to ring true for the people who it rings true for #i don't want it to be like ''awwwww look at this person!!! she's the EXCEPTION!!! :)" ..... #no.... not really..... #idk something gross happens whenever i admit to certain conditions and i turn into like inspiration p*rnography #like yes they actually let us use keyboards these days #furthermore i just... dont feel comfortable talking about this part of me. i had too bad of a childhood. adhd is one thing... #this one im like. still coming to terms with. which is like. my own journey. #idk. just please be kind. some things are more private than others. this one feels private to me. #i do not know how to help others w/this . and i do not know how to help myself. i will talk about it if im ever ready. idk if that will #actually ever happen #ty in advance i love u im kissing you we are kissing somewhere on the spectrum

[platyroonism]

but if I'M a traumatized kid and YOU'RE a traumatized kid... who's playing the game!?

#frisk #chara #undertale #i just think the player as some kind of eldritch entity would be sooooo funny. the eldritch god capable of deleting everything #wants to smooch a ghost #also i'm not really a subscriber of 'demon chara' theory/canon #like thematically they DO represent the player or whatever #but also #.... they are just a silly kid :) #who likes chocolate :) #plart

[verashalurks]

if there were no people around I would be able to accomplish anything

#and do whatever I want #vera says shit #context: #there’s some cookie on the table but I didn’t wanna get some because my grandma is right there #and after I was done with my food I was gonna get some #but then my grandma said “did you get full” and I said “yeah” and now I can’t eat that cookie because “I’m full now”

[fairycosmos]

it's like why do i feel ashamed of every action or inaction i ever make. will i ever be ok with myself. will i ever just let it be

#seriously it's exhausting agnoising over whatever i do or dont do it's shit i just want to live and #not think

[thelesbianthespianposts]

imagine: you get your memories back after years of amnesia to find out your whole species is dead and earth doesn’t exist anymore. that the only thing left of your culture is your weird ex and his busted honda civic that barely even works that he stole from the government when he was 13. And he’s been taking members of an alien species for trips in his honda civic and they’re all like “woah it’s so cool” and you get upset because it’s NOT COOL it’s a honda civic, the turn signals don’t even work “wow it can go up hills” yeah OF COURSE IT CAN GO UP HILLS EVERY CAR COULD DO THAT. but they’ve never seen a car before so everything it does is the coolest thing ever. And your ex’s only tool is a fucking screwdriver which is somehow also cool to this dumbass alien species even though it’s a fucking screwdriver so you just look like an idiot screaming about how none of this is even cool it’s actually really shitty but your whole planet is gone so you can’t even prove it but also you’ve had a constant drumming sounding in your head since you were 10 slowly driving you insane. I would become evil too.

#This metaphor might have gotten away from me #Whatever #the master #toschei #doctor who #tardis #the doctor #Companion: wow it can actually fully reverse and go backwards! #The master: *seething bc EVERY CAR CAN DO THAT* #I would be so mad if the only thing left of my culture was my ex and his terrible car #That he doesn’t even have a license to drive #Tensimm #J watches drwho #I really wanna draw this but I don’t have any artistic ability due to there being no apples in my brain #Plus your ex kinda wants to fuck the car

[some---weirdo]

If this post gets:

100 notes I'll explain my gender to my friends and tell them my pronouns

500 notes I'll explain my romantic orientation to my friends (they think I'm aroace, I just identify as ace) ✓

1000 notes I'll come out to my sibling (they're agender, I know they'll support me)

10 000 notes I'll come out to my sister (she has pronouns in her discord bio, it'll be fine)

100 000 notes I'll tell my best friend I love her

1 000 000 notes I'll come out to my homophobic, transphobic conservative Christan family that I live with (they still talk to my agender sibling, so it'll just be very awkward for the next few years...)

#lgbtq community #lgbtq #lgbtqia #asexual #asexuality #gender #transgender #trans #nonbinary #enby #aroace #aro/ace #ace #aspec #acespec #asexual spectrum #aromantic #arospec #aromantism #aro #aroacespec #queer #agender #gay #lesbian #bisexual #biromantic #bi #pronouns #i may or may not actually do any of this. i can do whatever i want

[bakedbeanchan]

Drawing from a mini comic where the timeline is reset but Zuko still has all his memories

Minicomic here

#baked bean originals #I just like drawing sokkas mortified face and then checked out #absolutely humiliated by some fire nation ponytail freak and then your little sister and that stupid bald kid want to befriend him after he #starts lying about how you all were friends in a parallel universe or whatever #that's rough buddy #just realized it looks like zuko's doing some pathetic little thumbs up here #avatar the last airbender #atla #sokka #zuko #katara #aang

[stuckinapril]

friend wanted to see my tumblr, and when i told him i can’t show it to him bc it’s basically my personal diary he went “oh so I can’t see it but a bunch of strangers on tumblr can??” he literally does not get me. no one will get me like the people in my phone get me

#It’s just so different #even though it’s public it still feels secret and safe. i feel comfy sharing a lot more on here than I do in my actual day to day life lol #in my head I’m also just speaking to myself 90% of the time which helps #if a friend off tumblr saw my thoughts I’d feel so weird ab it #esp bc they might get the vagueposting about certain situations and tell mutual friends #no thank u. this is for me. I’m not about to start censoring my thoughts bc someone I know knows my tumblr #u guys literally saw me have LIVE BREAKDOWNS #meanwhile I’ll have the worst fucking day in history and tell no one about it. I’m already cripplingly private but way more so in real life #this is basically a low stress journaling outlet for me. it’s so important for me to maintain the separation #like this is actually my diary & has been so handy for letting out emotions / articulating thoughts / staying on track !! #& I’ve met so many kind people on here who actually get me. which is so hard to find irl bc I’m surrounded by pre-med gunners/overachievers #who are by standard not very good w emotion & can be competitive/judgmental. or at least it’s hard for me to be vulnerable in front of them #and I’m part of that crowd so I reserve my emotions only to a handful of very close friends #it’s nice to hop on here and express negative emotions!! or positive emotions!! just whatever I want and it’s low stress and people get me #I don’t have to worry about judgment or competitiveness etc etc #like everyone on here is so kind & nice & understanding. & just a breath of fresh air from the types I run w. it’s just nice to have this #so idk that’s why I think I’ll always be strict about keeping the worlds separate. it just works #p

[astronomical-bagel]

when the nonverbal protagonist is nonverbal

#one of my biggest peeves is when fancontent ignores someone's nonverbal-ness #like you can do whatever you want forever but also I love it when characters are nonverbal #anyways shout-out to saiki kusuo #astronomically random

[anneapocalypse]

So, just curious how many writers and creators will have to be forcibly outed by relentless harassment before we acknowledge that "This queer characters was written by a cishet person and that's why they're bad" is not good criticism.

#yes i'm just going to come out and say it i'm talking about sera #not exclusively but i am talking about her #'but her writer actually iS A--' you don't know that! it doesn't matter! and i don't care! #just say that you do not like the character. #people will reblog posts about the latest actor or YA author or whatever getting forced out of the closet and be like #'wow. :( that's terrible.' #and then GO RIGHT BACK TO DOING IT #when are we going to learn #when are we going to stop doing this BEFORE somebody is forcibly outed #because in practical terms #that means you have to be okay with queer characters being written by straight people. #you have to stop weaponizing that against writers you don't like. #you have to be willing to critique the writing on its own merits #without using the writer's (assumed) identity to prop up your arguments #that's how it works #but who wants to actually change the way they talk about media #when tearing apart people's identities for clout is far more entertaining. #gwaren exports #fandom problems #fandom critical

[chewaai]

As Welcome to Night Vale is gaining another burst of popularity, I do wish to send out a warning to people who are very sensitive to psychotic episodes: be careful if you want to listen to it

If you're the type of person who has #unreality blacklisted, don't listen to too many episodes in a row/maybe avoid it all together?

Stay safe <3

#I love wtnv and I don't want to scare off people with a strong sense of reality #but when I first listened to wtnv about 8 years ago I did really mess up my sense of reality #wtnv #cecilsweep #welcome to night vale #cecil palmer #also you know yourself better than I do so do whatever works for you

[the-gom-jabbar]

The whole genetics project of the Bene Gesserit may have been dubbed a failure because Paul wasn't a girl but there was nothing stopping Paul and Feyd-Ruatha acting on that sexual tension they had in both book and film.

Paul could have taken Feyd as a third Consort. Just imagine Paul with his Empress Irulan and his wife Chani sitting at his side and Feyd just sprawled on the dais steps just wearing something scandalous like

You were right Reverend Mother Gaius Helen Mohiam, wasted potential.

#I mean Paul could have taken Feyd as a third consort #The Imperial Quad #Irulan could write Chani could be Paul's actual spouse #Feyd could just lounge around Arrakeen or Kaitan just looking pretty and doing whatever he wanted #Feyd would get jealous of course #dune #paul atreides #dune 2021 #dune memes #dune messiah #frank herbert #children of dune #chapterhouse: dune #duncan idaho #god emperor of dune #feyd rautha #paul x feyd rautha #feyd rautha harkonnen #house harkonnen #house atriedes #house corrino #frank herbert's dune #reverend mother mohaim #Reverend Mother Gaius Helen Mohiam #Bene Gesserit #dune part two #dune part ii #Dune 2

[ceescedasticity]

I saw another post today which seemed to assume "expensive wireless earbuds" and "no headphones at all" were the only options in public and

Do people not know about these?

Getting rid of headphone jacks is total garbage but they do make earbuds that hook into your phone's charging/data port.

#i actually want this seen how do i tag it #headphones #earbuds #alternatives to wireless earbuds #whatever #unsolicited rl opinions #unsolicited discursive opinions