#and am trying to fix them

[madootles]

12 year old ed verbally assaulting the librarian

#edward elric #alphonse elric #newsflash they are still super fun to draw #im not super happy with these so maybe i'll fix them up later idk #fma #just imagine 12 y o ed trying to check out 20 books at the library.... someone is getting verbally assaulted by the time he's through #hilarious #I wanted to color these a little but I am very tired so here #cos #pink sketches #fma03 #should I make these black line instead of pink//.... eh #fullmetal alchemist #fan art #sketches #ponytail al #cos al #;)

[carnivalcarriondiscarded]

thinking about Eddie & hyacinths again

#as you can surmise im Perfectly Normal about it #this man doesnt make me insane at all. nope. #trying out some new coloring and texture and background things... #on a side note. and i say this so lovingly bc theyre my favorite flowers #FUCK DRAWING HYACINTHS ALL MY HOMIES HATE DRAWING HYACINTHS #that was hell on earth. #ANYWAY THIS DUDE IS NEAT I HOPE HE DIES #nah im jesting im Jesting. am i tho #dead or alive i want him to experience unimaginable horrors and then die ten times and come back Normal #bc eddie strikes me as a 'dying would fix them' character #whether its a real death or a perceived death or Youve Been Dead The Whole Time death dont care dont care #i need him dead on the ground for at leeeaaaast five minutes #id be frothing at the fucking mouth. ragh #scribble garnish #welcome home #welcome home puppet show #eddie dear #originally this was gonna be a Very bloody little piece #but then my brain went 'hey. symbolism. what if the blood was flower petals. from hyacinths' #and ohhhh i couldnt pass that up #i wish i did! i would have had a lot more fun drawing a gruesome injury rather than Those Damn Flowers! #i dont know why ive latched onto the hyacinths outside the post office but my brain wont let go #ITS JUST SO SPECIFIC. why why whyyyyyy put that specific flower by this specific guy #especially flowers with Those Meanings and That Myth #*violently shaking the site* WHAT DO YOU MEANNNNNN #ok im getting myself too worked up i need to touch grass or poke the fire

[yuri-is-online]

Ok but how did ace even get a girlfriend in the first place? Did she confess and he just went along with it? Did he think having a girlfriend would make him seem cooler? Was it a dare or something? Cause for someone like ace to just go ghost on her and not have an actual talk, kind of makes me feel like these two were not friends before they were partners.

So then, fast forward to nrc, ace is trying so hard to lose the feelings he has for his best friend. Because that's all they are: friends, homies, if you (duece) will. Yuu has the cream of the crop to pick from, he's kind of at a disadvantage here.

Plus, whose to say their entire dynamic won't change the second they get together? He doesn't want to get bored and start to hate one of his dearest friends by proxy, so might as well just play it safe and suffer a little than take that risk and the both of you suffer a lot 🤷‍♂️.

Meanwhile yuu, who still has their old phone/mp3 player, has been playing Jenny by Studiokillers on repeat. Lying in their bed, just down horrendous for this absolute ball of boyish mischief. How dare he, honestly?

Well. At least he gives them a lot of openings to flirt with him?

*disclaimer, I was home schooled so my actual knowledge about middle school dating is beyond non-existent so take what I say with a grain of salt

The information we get about Ace's girlfriend comes from his suitor suit vignette and he does not mention how they actually got together, just some of the things that they did and how boring Ace thought all of them were. And I agree! The way they broke up does not make it sound like they were friends before dating, though they could have been casual acquaintances. The way Ace likes to goof around makes me think he was probably pretty popular, and had a lot of those types of relationships. His description of the relationship makes me think he probably went out with her because he thought she was cute and that it would be fun to have a girlfriend, but didn't actually stop to think about who she was as a person or what dating actually means. And hey, he was in middle school. He was going to be a bit stupid about those sort of things. The experience seems to have made him think a lot about what he wants in a partner, and we know from Ortho he was telling the truth when he's forced to spell it out:

His voice lines flesh out what he wants a bit more; he says he thinks it's important to find someone you have fun with and that he wants to get married later in life. So Ace knows what he wants... he just gets really embarrassed when called out on it and refuses to talk honestly about his feelings (though he kind of does that in general hehe)

So flashing forward to NRC. Ace knows what he wants and Yuu is such a perfect fit it hurts. Best friends to lovers is a popular trope in fiction sure, but in real life? At a school? Yeah right, Ace still has to see them every day if they break up, and not to mention... I feel like Ace, Deuce, Grim, and Yuu sort of fell into their dynamic almost immediately after the mine adventure and didn't ever stop to think about it because of how natural the friendship felt. And Ace knows if things end badly he's losing the whole squad, so yeah. Better to just swallow this and stay where he is. He's still in school! He doesn't need to think about dating! He's got a housewarden to surpass, upperclassmen he admires, and a bunch of idiots to take care of. He can worry about dating later. Besides, these feelings will go away after graduation he's delusional sure of it!!!

Meanwhile, back at the ranch Ramshackle Yuu is literally in a living hell. Maybe they're a bit more emotionally mature than Ace and they just know this could work out but THEY CAN'T TELL IF HE LIKES THEM BACK BECAUSE HE KEEPS GETTING SHY AND MAKING JOKES FML!!!! But like he also lets them steal his gym shirt :ccc and he gets pouty when someone else makes an offer :ccc and really smug when Yuu says no ccc: so like maaaybe? Or maybe not and this meaningless flirting is all they'll ever have and they just. Try to be ok with it and they sort of hate themselves for it.

until Sebek properly joins the friend group and looses his fucking shit

#<3 asks #twisted wonderland x reader #twst x reader #ace trappola x reader #aceyuu #ace trappola #had a thought insp by mochi's request they did for me that um #if crowley is malleus's dad #and he's trying to resurrect his mom #there could be parallels between him and ace in a timeloop aceyuu au #they both have a love taken from them by fate #they both have a friend who they've helped inspire to be better that they are forced to abandon #maybe out of fear they won't approve of their methods #maybe out of fear that they will #also started thinking about the steadfast tin soldier and using that as symbolism for aceyuu (i am down bad) #(i have other things i need to do) #(like fix my masterlist jesus)

[nedeii]

wip X2

#i never post them but maybe it wouldn't be all that bad idk #still having some weird mental hurtles to traverse >_> #and explore #and learn from #kicking my perfectionism to the other edge of the universe would be step no 1 #i used to be way less scared and going through my oooold stuff there's a sense of freedom i kind of like #and now i visibly lack it #SO MAYBE I WONT FIX THOSE WONKY SHOES WHEN RENDERING #WHO KNOWS #anyway #hello tumblr #I'll try not to be a coward and post something sometime #thanks for sticking around #sky 星を紡ぐ子どもたち #thatskygame #wip #skyblr #are these too many hashtags am i going to face THE CONSQUENCES is this instagram if you post more than x you PERISH ohnoohno

[solarpunkani]

PROGRESS!!!!!!

#out of queue #ani rambles #so the problem i had earlier was ‘i made 2 chains when i wasnt supposed to and everything was whack’ #but i fixed it so now its Less Whack. #this is gonna be the hood i have like 12 more rows to stitch which might be a full ball of my yarn #also im understanding how motherfuckers listen to podcasts #i listened to like 4 video essays dissecting hozier lyrics and comparing them to dantes inferno #like my other hobbies (drawing and writing) require imagination and concentration and Specific Vibes #crochet requires a different kind of concentration #but so far its good for listening to new music and videoessays so maybe i’ll try a podcast tomorrow. or friday #tomorrow meaning later today because ITS FIVE AM #AAAAAAAAA

[mishy-mashy]

Bruce is actually really attractive, and I have enough reasoning to make a list

He's:

Tall (. Tall enough to hit his head on the vault doorframe)

Long-legged

Has a straight nose bridge

Has high cheekbones (more noticeable in 2nd pic below)

Has a strong jawline

Sharp eyes, but they aren't small (plus eyebags if you're into that)

Overall, he has strong, attractive facial features

Has broad, refined shoulders. You can tell he works out (or he did, when he was alive)

Even has a thick, muscly neck

He has MUSCLE. Is SCULPTED. NOICE. VERY NOICE. (nice arms. Nice shoulders. Nice neck. Nice legs. Nice butt-)

(There are actually panels where you can see some of his muscles. Other than those already shown here, he's got bricky thighs-

-and in the panels where we first get his name dropped, he's got those shoulder blades too-)

The one time we see him smile, and he actually has a scary one

Has small, kinda sharp pupils, and his eyes remind me of a cat. We only ever saw him tense or defensive, so his resting/listening face is really cute

Other than the physical appearance stuff, he also:

Takes shit without batting an eye (patience, knowing it's just how Kudo is, etc)

Kudo being all "Cut the crap Bruce and give it to me straight", after Bruce tests his blood and is rightfully Concerned because they just faced AFO

Put up with Kudo's experimenting and testing over Yoichi's transferable Factor

Did ya'll see the look on Kudo's face when he realized he had Yoichi's Factor/will? Kudo was going to start in nonsense and Bruce just dealt with that.

Also something I noticed when looking back at the images here; Bruce has bandages on his arms in the void. But not when he faced AFO in the sewers.

Were he and Kudo cutting their arms open in their experimenting over Yoichi's theory? Is this why Kudo has two gauntlets instead of his one? Why we never see his bare arms in the void? That he always keeps his arms down so there's no slip?

Is smart enough to run blood tests, plus has enough common sense to pick Shinomori as his successor

He picked a guy who avoids society, has an Ability to detect danger so he can always stay away from AFO, is also a coward so he's never going to go throw himself into danger, even without knowing instinctively he stands no chance, etc.

Meanwhile, Kudo chose Bruce, who he played Hot Potato Yoichi with; but he did also trust Bruce, and put the only pure combative Ability in OFA through Bruce.

These two made their choices based on what they valued and saw the Factor needed.

Is logical, analytical, and calm.

He tried advising Midoriya on their Abilities in One For All, especially his own.

Midoriya then tried ignoring him about using Fa Jin for the first time, but found he was right, thinking: "Dammit!! I had [Lady Nagant] right where I wanted her, but... ugh! The Third was right. My parallel Quirk processes are all screwed up!" (ch. 314).

Plus, when Midoriya fixed his processing mistakes, Bruce was analyzing the way he reached his new conclusion. Pure facts, no bias, very calm, just saying it as it was.

We never see him panic. When he's caught by surprise in the sewers by AFO, Kudo, and Yoichi's little bubble event, he immediately reacts. He doesn't falter, he just knows he has to do something right now.

Was more willing to listen than Kudo to Yoichi's beckon, and probably was just following Kudo's rejection of Midoriya

While we don't see Kudo's face, we see Bruce's eyes when Yoichi calls on his heroes. Bruce was more open and receptive, or at least more impacted.

Bruce was also the one to start talking, while Kudo just kept quiet.

He actually communicates a lot

When Yoichi called them to support Midoriya, Bruce started talking to paint a picture of why they thought the way they did, so Yoichi understood where they were coming from.

(Though he seems to beat about the bush sometimes, since Kudo spoke up to be direct on how they couldn't just put their trust in some starry-eyed teenager. Plus, when Kudo tells him to just tell him what's wrong [double Factors])

When Midoriya first used Fa Jin against Nagant, Bruce came out just to tell him he knew what he was trying, but that Midoriya wasn't ready; and Midoriya found he was right. Midoriya just didn't want to listen to him then.

He asks Kudo for clarification after finding Kudo had two Factors in him after the sewer incident ("Just to be sure, All For One didn't touch you, right?") Kudo knew him well enough to go "stop beating around the bush and tell me", so Bruce was probably gonna start with questions, theories, and trying to understand everything in general, before saying "yeah you have two Factors. Don't know why".

Is strong-willed and loyal.

He followed Kudo, even to death, carrying on the cause he started until it ended with him.

Plus, when talking about how AFO needs a strong will to override OFA's own, we first see Bruce, Kudo, and Yoichi.

AFO couldn't steal OFA because the will was too strong for him, and that was back during Banjo's time. Since Shinomori never actually tried opposing AFO and just hid, we can assume the first Three (Yoichi, Kudo, Bruce) already had an accumulation of strong willpower that made OFA un-stealable. Those three are a strong enough foundation, and the main wills, that the other users just become bonuses.

Kudo, also saying that Midoriya needs allies with the same will and drive as him... hey Kudo, you're talking about yourself and your old allies, aren't you? That's why you look at Yoichi and Bruce when you say this.

Not only is Bruce attractive, but he's got good character. THE END.

#yes this is a bruce appreciation post #am i biased? yes. am i right that he has these features? also yes. #hes actually a very attractive person. hes got all the right features for it #plus hes smart (some medical knowledge) is really loyal strong-willed and patient #he puts up with kudo SO much #from being bossed around to taking home yoichis brother to whatever the heck kudo made him do to figure out OFA's transfer properties..... #i didnt think much of bruce originally #then i started doing resistance fic stuff and now hes a fave #hes a little blorbo #that i throw in terrible situations for my own entertainment #used his scary smile for comedy purposes #like when he made a kid cry once. or when a meta child was afraid of him so they bit him #has patience to deal with kudo and co. but also. has enough bite to snark them. is how i like writing him #oh? background character? well lemme just *picks him up* EXPAND ON THAT- #fic stuff: he tries making a good impression on a girl and kudo is ruining it immediately #he doesnt know what to do because the two always banter #kudo: fuck you #oc: fuck me yourself you coward #he sees through a rose-lens that kudo is trying to rip off his face #appeciation kinda turned analysis in general #bruce #kudo #yoichi shigaraki #bnha #mha #spoilers #boku no hero academia #my hero academia #NOT YOICHIS BROTHER. i meant Yoichi / AFO's brother in a prev tag up there but theres too much tags i dont wanna rewrite to fix that #(image limit and tag limit)

[qcellbit]

meta talk. i don't quite know how to word this properly, but adding french creators to the qsmp is the riskiest thing quackity studios could've done and it doesn't surprise me that the success to which it was executed was minimal.

adding portuguese speaking creators exclusively from brazil as the first batch outside of the initial english and spanish speakers was the perfect "soft expansion" for the server when you consider the reason for the project's conception - because quackity had experienced poor treatment from white americans as a bilingual latino creator and sought to unite his two communities in an empowering way, further expanding this very noble and personal idea to encapsulate all communities and all languages spanning across the entire world. inviting more latino creators who have likely had the same experiences and would be able to appreciate what the project is trying to achieve is a no-brainer.

it's an uncomfortable thing to touch on (which is why i've never, ever, seen it spoken about on this website), but minecraft projects and communities have always had massive problems with all forms of bigotry, but especially racism. white americans and white europeans have probably not felt the euphoria of seeing their culture celebrated in mainstream global entertainment projects as they already absolutely dominate the entertainment industry on a global scale. as someone who is visibly brown and living in europe, i've always got a lot of grief from classmates and co-workers in the form of ignorant jokes and flat out exclusion - it's an unfortunate cultural norm that bleeds into streaming due to the medium's casual and open nature, unnoticed or unchallenged by white viewers who don't want to have to confront a content creator's bigotry in fears of having to stop watching them. something that cannot be ignored by the people it's actually affecting. there is a reason dsmp and hermitcraft cosplay meet ups are dominated by pale skin.

i love the qsmp because its inclusion of latin american creators and quackity's selectiveness based on personal experience have largely (and i do mean largely, not entirely, but that's a discussion for another day) eliminated that problem.

the most prominent and succinct example i can think of is the photo of quackity's bedroom that was mocked countless times by his english speaking community and his bigoted english speaking friends when he streamed on the dsmp - when that photo was brought to the qsmp, forever, a fellow latino creator, was the first person to gently offer solidarity because he had come from the same impoverished latin american background. to me, and to a lot of minorities, that is what the qsmp is about. yeah, sharing languages in a minecraft server is novel, it's a fun way for americans who did poorly in high school to get back into learning spanish, but it stands for so much more when you're a racial minority. when your pleading in the dsmp fandom was drowned out and ignored for the entire duration of its run. when you're completely unrepresented in minecraft tournaments, and when known bigots are encouraged to participate in said tournaments to boost viewership because numbers are paramount. when you are finally seeing your culture appreciated rather than mocked on streams with tens of thousands of viewers all over the world as part of a massive project with a brilliant, engaging story.

it was obviously necessary to branch out of the americas at some point with what the project is attempting to achieve, but such a task is daunting when the next group you're inviting and their community probably do not have the capacity through personal experience to appreciate what the project stands for at its core in the same way the first batches do. can non americans all relate in discussions of the internet and entertainment industry being america and by extension english speaking centric? yeah, of course. but can white europeans relate when the only representation you have in said media revolves around harmful bigoted stereotypes? can there be a quiet solidarity between a white frenchman and a brown brazilian based on experiences with government, racial profiling, and online mockery? no. and in the landscape of livestreaming stupid jokes for entertainment alongside fast paced gameplay, these nuances are probably not going to be acknowledged.

in complete contrast to the solidarity exhibited between quackity and forever when discussing their poverty growing up in latin america, i have not forgotten and never will forget aypierre excusing his constant racist jokes aimed at the brazilians on his uniquely "french dark humour" that the brazilians, hurt by his comments, could "not understand." this is not an excusable cultural difference, but a symptom of white european privilege, and total ignorance towards what the project is meant to stand for. a smooth integration of all the world's cultures necessitates white european and white american introspection in a way that i haven't seen a lot of streamers capable of. admitting fault to such a degree and the ego of a large online personality do not often mesh well.

i'm always very irritated when people (especially english speakers) complain about them not "adding the germans" sooner despite us seeing applications for german speaking admins many months ago - because it would not be a task of simply throwing out server invites to content creators and cobbling together an animation of a submarine crashing into the island. you cannot downplay the ambition of this project and the mammoth task its trying to accomplish. people take for granted and forget that this is an unprecedented melding of cultures that would never otherwise interact and clash on the rare occasions they do. the french qsmp community being small and the french creators largely being outliers when it comes to the qsmp is not something born out of malice or purposeful exclusion, but simply a symptom of an unspoken lack of solidarity and inability to meaningfully relate based on everything from wildly varying privilege to global placement.

and don't get me wrong - i'm not excusing things like the times at which events are broadcast (i literally live in europe and have to stay up until sunrise to see most events, i think the admins do have to bite the bullet and begin structuring events around a new timezone that isn't the globally inconvenient unsustainable PST), or the exclusion of clips from french content creators at the presidential dinner, but i think attributing those admin choices to the brazilian community being unfairly favoured is downplaying what the qsmp as a project means for minorities, especially when the brazilian community receive the most scorn for infamously being the first to call out bigoted behaviour from qsmp content creators. yeah, it sucks that the french haven't slotted into the qsmp as well as the brazilians and aren't anywhere as numerous, but with all these unspoken contributing factors being taken into account, i can't be surprised.

i wish quackity and his team the best in smoothly integrating more languages and cultures in this amazing project in the future, but for the love of god please understand that the implications of this project and its impact are far larger than any streamer "drama" you might've witnessed in the past. and stop underplaying what this project is trying to achieve in an online landscape saturated in bigotry.

#sorry if this is worded weirdly im still recovering from a brain injury. ill fix typos as and when i notice them reading back on this #also dont tag this as discourse because its like.....not. and thats so unhelpful in recognising what im trying to get across #edit: ive seen a few people bringing it up now YES dont worry i am aware that etoiles isnt white thats why i made sure to specify white #when talking about where the issues were coming from #mine #qsmp

[kadethecat]

3%

#This mission means a lot to me #so I wanted to try to make something beautiful about it #My hand were shaky earlier so some of the lines aren’t straight and I couldn’t fix them but I think it looks ok #jupiter icy moons explorer #JUICE esa #Ganymede #Europa #Callisto #Io #Jupiter #Space #17776 #17776 juice #this art is more about the ongoing mission than JUICE’s appearance in 17776 but I am a fan.. and 17776 fans might like this #Astronomy #ESA #European Space Agency #Jupiter Icy Moons #Planets #Cat’s art

[thehappiestgolucky]

Someone in the tags of my last Xero post (you know who you are) talked about the similarities between a doodle and Hollow so naturally I couldn’t stop thinking about Xero and Hollow.

I love the idea that Xero was a loved and respected knight. The idea he saw Hollow as a child and knew, knew, this was a child. And Hollow so, so young, feeling guilt about even letting this knight show kindness and love to them - when they were meant to be hollow (oh but they couldn’t be)

Do you think they felt guilty? When they overheard Xero raise his voice at the King, quickly hushed, because he dared suggest Hollow was a child? When they started seeing this knight less and less, scared that their father was furious at him? When suddenly this knight was executed, for betraying the king? Was it their fault? Should they have never allowed him to be himself, ran to avoid indulging in the tiny moments of someone looking at them as a person? Did they even know Xero was falling to the infection? Would that make it feel worse?

They were both victims of an infection, bound by gods with their own desires. No one wins in a gods game.

#hollow knight #doodles #hk xero #hk hollow #feeling so many feelings for them rn #tw impalement #<i have been trying for ages to get a proper tag whilst not being yeeted off of tumblr search dear god #LISTEN hollow in fix-it fic would feel SO guilty about failing #and I just #i can’t WORD IT UGHHH #i have another xero related doodle dump but its much nicer au than ‘hee hoo knight who got caught in the wrong cross fire’ #*holds heads in hands* #if xero had known the entire vessel plan he 100% wouldn’t have needed the infection to turn his nails against the king #but he didn’t. and he feels horrible for not fully knowing the story behind hollow. but how could he? #it’s just - dshdjksdjkshdjkhsdjkshdhsdjks #do people get it? do you understand my tired untangable brainrot? #i am thinking a lot about xero again. no one is surprised

[theswedishpajas]

[Mii Maker Music]

!!Find the palette in this thread!!

#my art stuff #beetlejuice #cartoon #toonjuice #digital art #bugs #emoji #I made my own brush for the bugs so I can use them in the future #I’m trying to make art more enjoyable for myself and that means making it much less complicated and take less time #so I’m hoping to use this brush more in the future when drawing beej #or things in general #I’m getting better at lightning the weight I put on myself with my art #but it’s an upphills battle and I am STRUGGLING #I’ve been using this eene inker randomly for a while now and it’s making art so much easier to do for me somehow #but it looks so disgusting in my art. not cus it’s an ugly brush. I think it’s really nice-looking actually #but I have such a strong need for all my art to look clean and for every line to be intentionally put where it is #I have a tendancy to go in and fix singular pixels in EVERYTHING when I draw. even if just to make it intentionally look unintentional #but this brush does it on it’s own and I haven’t felt this relaxed while making digital art in MANY years and it’s STRESSING ME OUT #but it’s good that I can relax. That’s the goal. I want to be able to rnjoy drawing again. #The biggest hurdle is my autism hating change but once I’m past that I know I’ll be right as rain #in the meantime I hope people can still enjoy what little stuff I mannage to crank out randomly #also don’t ask me what the style is. my hand just went off with the “whatever just get it down real quick” mentality #I really need to draw the sweetheart more… I say when he is all I draw besides myself anymore-

[everythingisconfetti]

Like yes, it's hilarious that Pike, a level 20 cleric of Sarenrae, describes herself as a baker. but also- the fact that she can do that. that life has become such that if all she wants to do is make cookies and decorate her house with knick knacks and paintings of her friends- she can. Because god, have they earned it. It's in Pike's baking. In Percy's clocktower. In Vex, teaching her children to hunt for the sport of it, not because they need it to survive. It's in Whitestone, flourishing, alive.

So really- can Percy be blamed, for demanding Delilah isn't given the chance to return, with his young daughter right there? And Vex, Pike- their willingness to help, to even give a maybe, in the face of all that maybe could mean? To hold the weight of the past and of everything they have built since and still say yes, we'll try?

There's guilt there, yes, and a feeling of responsibility, but it's also looking at these people who just love their friend so much. And it's knowing what it's like to lose someone you love like that, the lengths you'll go- the lengths they have gone- to fix that. So they look at Imogen, at all the Hells, and they look at Laudna, in all she represents, in all she might be, and they say okay. We'll try. What an incredibly selfless choice.

#i have so many thoughts about the different reactions to the reminders of trauma #kiki's stoic action. percy's immediate blocking. #vex needing to fix it because of who laudna is #pike willing to try despite who laudna is #this group who have been through so much. who have experienced things the hells have only seen as #theme restaurant attractions. #i am cradling vox machina in my hands i feel SO MUCH for them #cr spoilers #cr3 #c3e36 #critical role #bells hells #vox machina

[fuckingstupidbracket]

like a regular bin, not even recycled or anything

#poll #okay so uh #dont read the tags ahead unless you care about my little vent #my mom got me a hoodie in December from shein #even tho i had two very similar hoodies already both from better brands #still fast fashion but not as fast #and one of them was modded by me #but the hoodie was fucking soft and comfy and good length so it quickly became my favourite hoodie #according to my mother tho after a month she started complaining that it's ugly. #it had those little balls idk what they're called but #1 i don't fucking care #2 they're removable #so anyway fot the past week or two shes been complaining every time i wore the hoodie and today she screamed at me and threw it in the trash #she also kicked me but thats unrelated #and like even if she bought me a new identical one that wouldn't help at all cause she still threw my stuff in the trasg #and bought from a company that goes against my values #and she keeps excusing it like “its cheaper” #im sorry but buying one good thing and wearing it too death is cheaper than buying a hundred things you throw away after less than 3 months #so fucking sick of this!!!!!!!! #i have more than enough clothes too and am currently trying to get rid of some #BUT NOT LIKE THAT WHAT THE FUCK #btw my vinted is dupiarz it's mostly stuff from 2017-2020 so not really trendy but maybe youd like something #the pnly clothing i dont bother repairing and just throw out is underwear #but i do fix socks because good socks are good socks

[sinyaru]

:^)

#good omens #aziraphale #crowley #aziracrow #ineffable husbands #digital art #fanart #digital fanart #crowziraphale #artists on tumblr #sfw #blush #yessss blushies #this is old and I just wanted to finish it #there's so much anatomy mistakes but I am too tired to try to even fix any of them hahhhaa.... #digital artwork #sinyaru art #sinyaru

[omaano]

…. Just so we all know this is the stage from where I need to pull my little clone portraits together

#Wip #my art #and then I will merge my sketch and paint layers together and the messing around starts for real #but FIRST I need to figure out my colours for good #haven’t struggled with them so much in a very very long time I feel like #shadows and mid tones and secondary light source and all that aaaah #I need to switch my brain off a little between commissions #I swore I was normal about that Tem gifset didn’t I? #then I stumbled into a fic where Rex picks up the horrible habit of smoking while on leave and here I am #I know I messed up something in my sketch that I will suffer to try and fix later but even when I flip it it doesn’t look TOO bad #he looks FINE in the reference window #which I will take at this point #the sketch took me as long as the other portraits from first line to colour adjustments lol #purple is giving me hell…. it’s time I run away and live out the rest of my life as a hermit away from civilization I suppose

[zebratimw]

Spirit animal SQH

#svsss #shang qinghua #but mainly I'm just here to vague post LMAO I don't like to vague post its not very effective in terms of venting but #but basically I guess I'm becoming hyperaware of my like... cognitive dissonance codependency and derealization ee #also my general laziness ig and where it overlaps into executive dysfunction or whatever like I may genuinely have some issues but #I am also a lazy son of a bitch jfjfkgkg and i need to figure out how to figure it out so I can work on both in more effective ways hhggg #oh yeah but basically the thing to remember for later is the silence in the call and the immediate unmute and chat activity once I left #I should remember this and stop interacting I think? I should try to give em space I think I'm being too clingy or something #or maybe my own silence is too awkward and dampens the call? I was kinda just spacing out and not doing anything so I get its kinda weird #LMAO so I should just like try not to be in call for those times mm #I just like being in call with my friends jdhfkg but I suppose its not very good either #I overindulge I suppose another friend pointed it out to me before too haha but fjfjjt its just easier than facing bouts of dread by myself #eehh and that's why I gotta do something about my Metnal Ailneses hfjfj but ngl I don't really know how to go about it... #I get embarrassed looking stuff up djfnfkg and half the time I don't even know what to look up I just draw ?s and I give up #I suppose I also have commitment issues too but that ones not new which is an issue of itself aaaaaaaa #man idk idk I just don't really get it I guess djdjfjf and I've got existential dreads and think maybe it doesn't really matter whats wrong #cause there's no point to fixing them because ultimately I'm gonna die alone and a failure anyways? so like ehfjgkg idk #its depressing and I know its like sabotage cause my brain is being a little silly a little goofy and its not a shared sentiment #with the better half of me and the entirety of my friends but yknow its just ee harder sometimes to believe in the optimism ig #and i can talk about it somewhat normally and without like having a ✨️break down #but yknow djfjgkg I'm very emotional a person ya? I think sqh is relatable for gods sake 💀 #irrationality sentimentality nihilism and existential dreads... wanting to die because living is too hard despite all my hopes for living... #just the ol regulars yknow? #and another thing... do I talk to my friends about these things? I vent them out here a lot but what do I really want? #I'm not strong enough to keep it to myself clearly but I'm also too proud to share these thoughts? I dump them out in the open and for what? #whenever someone reaches out with concern and care I don't respond in kind and refuse to elaborate? #so like what do I want with this? I guess I want someone to know I'm going insane half the time I'm awake? but not do anything about it? #that's pretty unfair I guess... and stupid I think I do want to share my thoughts with someone but I'm too scared of the ramifications #and that my pride can't stand the fact I might be looked differently by my friends even tho the image they have of me is already quite silly #man.... idk.... I'll come to conclusions myself and do nothing about them so I guess that'll happen again aah idk idk idk

[padfootastic]

please say more about jilypad + diverging parenting styles... perhaps even a possible scenario >:) i imagine harry has very cunning tactics for using this to his advantage

helloooooo <3 thank u for this ask bc i love talking about these three and harry. i went looking thru the archives to find this post; my first foray into this side, and really, i’ve never looked back after that.

so i’ve talked ab this a bit before but i fully think that james was a very overprotective ‘mother hen’ type parent. i tend to read his behaviour in lily’s bday letter to sirius as being scared of his child on a broomstick and i fully, fully think he’ll never be able to let go of that as harry grows up. he’ll be anxious and suspicious and paranoid, and his first instant will always be to wrap harry up in cotton wool and hide him away. (i low-key connect this to his childhood as well; going from being spoiled and sheltered to dropped in the middle of a war, black & white thinking, living in extremes etc etc makes it v hard for him to be Normal about his child. as he shouldn’t be, really, but yeah) that’s why he thrives during the initial years; he never minds the hard parts of being a new parent, loves it in fact, and it makes it better that he can keep harry close to him at all times w/o coming off as a helicopter parent (not that the notion bothers him ofc).

it’s good, then, that he has two partners to even the scales, no? i think lily was the most…balanced out of the three. she had a relatively normal childhood, grew up in a working class family/neighbourhood and had to deal w adversity from a young age so she’s developed a nice, thick skin. she also has a sibling with whom she has a v rocky relationship so she knows that kids are, ykno, a bit unhinged. and a little bit of hardship is not a problem. i hc her as needing time to get used to parenthood, unlike james who stepped into it natural as breathing, or even sirius who loved harry on much on first sight that it made up for everything else. ofc lily loved her son, but it didn’t come w the same blinding intensity of her partners and made her feel really shitty in the beginning. but, i think she’d shine during his teen years actually, because she’s not overbearing or intense and becomes the quiet, calm strength that a hormonal, spotty teen boy would probably need.

and sirius <3 our poor baby falls in love with harry, perhaps even more quickly than james, with such startling speed that it shakes his entire foundation. he doesn’t regret it but he’s constantly discombobulated. i also imagine that…it takes him longer to settle into the role of parent, esp bc he’s not biologically one ykno? not like it matters to anyone, ofc, but it takes him a long time to truly accept his authority and place, to believe that he has just as much right as j&l to be there, to parent harry. this has the consequence of him always being more indulgent than the other two; after all, he considered himself a godfather before a parent and a lot of that thinking stayed. he lets harry get away with stuff the others might not (and the little mf figures this out later); some of it also comes from sirius seeing so much shit, and facing so much shit himself, that he rationalises a lot of stuff as ‘well, this isn’t the worst it can be, so what’s the harm’ (because his life has been such a roller coaster that he’s forgotten that not everyone’s like that, if that makes sense?)

its obviously not this clear cut but i imagine harry looks at it like this: if he needs unconditional love, he goes to james; rationality and logic, lily; acceptance and calm, sirius. when someone has to be beat up for hurting harry, james steps in. if he needs help burying a body, it’s sirius. dealing with some asshole boss/teacher/classmate’s mother who’s making harry’s life hell? lily. i can keep going but,,,u get the idea, right? this makes sense, i hope lol

i actually think harry’s first birthday is a great example. sirius pushes the boundaries by gifting lil harry a broom; james loses his mind running after him; lily places an industrial sticking charm on harry’s butt, leans back with a glass of wine, and enjoys the show. even as he grows up, lily and james act as the disciplinarian, and sirius is the emotional outlet. all of them fill in each other’s cracks so well, and it’s only when harry grows up that he realises how effortlessly they worked off each other to parent him.

also oh man o man. harry being cunning is,,,,,see, i’ve not considered it this far but it makes perfect sense. i think canon harry actually had so much manipulative energy and it’s often overlooked for his goofier traits but! this is the same dude who used his dead parents to trick slughorn into revealing sensitive info! imagine if that could be channelled into his jilypad interactions 😈

it’s like, it takes him a bit, because his three parents r so smooth, but once he realises that all of them have certain weak spots, he does NOT hesitate to exploit them. (it has the unintended consequence of truly strengthening the jilypad relationship into an unbreakable one bc one thing their kid taught them is to have ironclad communication going at all times so nothing they’ve said, or not said, is used against them). so like, he knows if he wants to sneak out to a party, it has to be sirius and in a specific way—‘i’ll be totally safe, papa, plus i really wanna see what it’s like and idk when it’ll get a chance to again’. if he widens his eyes to pitiful levels, pouts a little, and blinks faster than usual, then james is putty in his arms as long as he’s separated from the other two. divide and conquer becomes the main tool in harry’s arsenal, actually. lily’s the toughest nut to crack, purely bc she doesn’t run on emotions or irreverence, but harry soon learns that if he comes up with a solid, logical case that proves his argument has unbiased merit then he has a good chance of getting her to say yes. (this is good, bc u can arrange words in the correct order, but u can’t always control emotions)

so overall yeah, you’d think one kid + 3 parents would be an easy bet, but harry keeps them on their toes all the fkn time.

#sirius black #james potter #lily evans #jilypad #harry potter #i knew before i even started this that it would be ridiculously long lmao #i just cannot bring myself to shut up #wrt lily and harry’s baby years #i feel v v strongly ab motherhood not coming naturally to her #and becoming a very sore point for her. bc she sees james and sirius and she keeps blaming herself for being an unfeeling robot #when she’s not. she just thinks more logically than them and doesn’t feel as strongly. that doesn’t make her a bad mother #and no matter what j & s say a small part of always thinks like that. until the teen years. and suddenly the dynamics r reversed #bruh i think i need help it’s not even funny how not hinged i am for this trio lmao #there also! padfoot! #a while ago i wrote a lil thing. but i fully believe that whenever harry was emotionally distraught he’d actually go to padfoot #bc he needed someone to just. sit. and be there. while he’s processed emotions #and lily would be too ruthlessly logical and james would be fretting and trying to fix it and sirius would panic. just a little. #but padfoot is a warm comforting weight agains this side and he just lets him be. it’s grounding. #so harry always. without fail. does that #it’s actually 3.5 parents lmao #i do wonder what their parenting fights would about if any. hmmmm. my glasses are too rose tinted for me to consider it #a thought for another day #anyway. hope this endless rambling made sense! and that u liked it! #would love to hear ur thoughts too <3 #pen’s notes #pen’s asks