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creamecafe · 1 year

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Hey! Can we get a Shuri x F!Reader fic, where the reader is mildly superpowered and had moved to Wakanda per request of the Queen after T'challa's passing to allow Shuri to have one trusted friend with her and she stays with her throughout Shuri's grieving period and fights alongside her and her people out at sea, earning herself the title of 'Hero' in the eyes of the Wakandan's despite not being one of their own, and of course, she and Shuri fall in love with eachother but they dont confess until before Shuri drinks the contents of her artificial heart, and before she goes she tells the reader she loves her incase the plant sends her into cardiac arrest and she dosent get the chance to tell her? Sorry for the long request.

Your the Only Friend I Need

*Spoilers for Black Panther: Wakanda Forever if you haven't seen it yet. You have been warned*

Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3

Navigation | Who I Write For | Shuri Udaku Playlist | Also on Wattpad!

Summary: What the request said (Until I can make up a good summary)

Pairing: Shuri Udaku x Fem!Reader with Super-Powers

Warnings: mutual pining, mentions of death, grief, depression, friends to lovers, and eventually fluff at the end. Also not double checked but I'll have to get to that soon.

a/n: @ackroxia this is an absolutely great idea of a request tysm! And DW about it being so long it's perfect!

The king is dead. T'Challa is dead. It was hard for you to accept the news that your close friend is gone. Especially thinking of how the Queen and his sister are feeling due to his death. You have been meaning to reach out to Shuri but didn't know when the right time was.

She was your best friend. Of course, the right thing to do is bring her comfort but didn't know how.

Your thoughts were disturbed as you hear a knock on your door and you go to approach to see who's there.

You look through the peephole and it was none other than the powerful female soldier group known, as the Dora Milaje. You open the door and allowed them in.

"Okoye and Ayo. It's nice to see you both. What brings you here?"

"Hello Y/N it's nice to see you too," Okoye smiled.

"We are here by the Queens' order" Ayo answered.

Oh no. The Queen. It could either mean something good or bad.

"The Queen. What does she need? How can I be a help of assistance?"

"She wants you to come to Wakanda in order of comfort for Shuri due to her state of the Kings death."

"Of course my condolences to the king. And how's Shuri?"

"Not so well. She spends much of her time in the lab. Rarely gets out to socialize or eat."

"I can imagine the death of her brother and how it affects her. They were really close."

"Indeed they were. We need you to come to Wakanda."

"Of course. I don't mind staying a couple of weeks there to comfort Shuri."

"No, I'm not talking about weeks. I mean permanently."

Permanently? Living in Wakanda permanently? It sounds like a dream because you have been to the country before to fight Thanos and how beautiful it is but to live there permanently never crossed your mind.

"Permanently? Like I stay there forever, leaving all my stuff here and my home?"

"I know it sounds like a lot. But Shuri could really use comfort."

You stopped and pondered a moment to think about the choice you would have to make. Shuri is your friend. It feels like a privilege you are chosen as a comfort to be by Shuri's side in an amazing country.

You took a deep breath in and sighed.

"I will go to Wakanda. For Shuri."

"We will help you bring your stuff."

You then started packing your stuff in order to leave your home and enter your new one, Wakanda. After you had everything packed and head off to the ship waiting outside, just practically calling your name, you looked back at your home and how much you will miss it. But then you remember this is for Shuri, a choice you made. You turn your head towards it and never looked back.

Now you were on the ship settled in and waiting for you to arrive at your destination.

-Time Skip-

You had now arrived at Wakanda and were now in the citadel guarded by more of the Dora Milaje. You walked to the meeting room and where the throne is. The doors opened and there stood the most powerful woman known, the Queen of Wakanda, hence her real name Ramonda.

"Queen." You bow down in respect towards her.

"Y/N. You are a friend to Wakanda and part of this family. There's no need to bow."

"I know but my parents always taught me to respect my elders." I smile at her and she does too

She goes to hug me and I reach in. Her hug was firm but also soft. Once you pulled out of the hug, she put her hands on your shoulders and slowly slide to your hands.

"I thank you for coming to Wakanda. I'm sorry for the short notice, but I just want my daughter to be alright."

"No it's ok I understand. My condolences to you and Shuri about the king, your son. First your husband and now your son. I can't imagine the pain you are going through."

"Well here in Wakanda, death is not the end." She smiled sweetly and cupped my face.

"You are a very strong woman Queen, I always admired that about you."

"You are very sweet Y/N, I always loved that about you."

Your heartbeat happily at her kindness.

"Come I'll let you see Shuri."

You nodded and followed her to Shuri's lab. You forgotten how big it was and how much you missed it.

You climb down the steps and see a whole bunch of technology around you and hologram screens. Then you saw her, Shuri.

"Shuri, I have a surprise for you."

"I don't think I'll be interested mama."

"Why you haven't even seen it yet? It's a special someone."

Shuri turns around rolling her eyes until she stops when she sees you. Her eyes widened.

"Y/N?"

"Hi Shuri," You smiled.

"Y/N, oh my god why didn't you tell me you were coming?"

"Well um.."

"I had her come to my request. To comfort you."

"Wait you requested for her to come?"

"To stay with you permanently."

"What? No mama, no you can't do that to Y/N. She can't be here because you want her to, what about her family, her home?"

"Shuri it's ok. I wanted to come here. I chose to. For you."

"But..." Shuri sighed.

"You need someone by you and I will do that." I interrupted her and held her shoulder. "I don't care if I have to stay in Wakanda for the rest of my life. I just want you to be ok. That's what matters to me""

Shuri looked down. She felt guilty that you're willing to leave your home to stay in Wakanda with her. She never had someone be her first priority before, especially you.

"I appreciate it Y/N. Thank you so much "

"Now you see why I wanted her to come here Shuri" Ramonda smiled at Shuri.

"Yes mama" Shuri laughed and you smiled too.

"I'll let you two be," Ramonda said as she left the lab.

You both look as the Queen leaves the lab and then turn to each other and smile.

"Do you want me to show you your room?"

"Yeah of course."

You both laugh as you leave the lab to see your new room. When you both arrived it was beautiful. The windows were big enough to see over the city of Wakanda and the night sky with many stars. You were able to put your luggage in and soon be able to decorate it the way you want. You and Shuri just spend the rest of the day talking and hearing how she's doing with the passing of T'Challa.

The first night of Wakanda has been comforting and soothing. The guards had given you comfort clothing, clothing of their culture, and sandals. The food was just immaculate with the seasonings put into it.

When you first took a bit of the food, your eyes widened. Shuri taking a sight at this laughed.

"Is it good?"

"Good? Amazing! Why didn't I have some sooner?"

You both laugh and continue eating.

After eating, you went to take a nice steamy hot bath and just sighed at the calm and relaxing experience. After you were done, you put your pajamas on and were heading to bed. You went to Shuri's room and knocked on the door. Shuri went to the door and opened it. She smiled when she saw you.

"Hey Y/N"

"Hey, Shuri I just came to say goodnight."

"Well, goodnight to you. And thank you for choosing to stay in Wakanda. " She went and gave you a hug

"Or course," You embraced the hug. "Anything for you."

"I know you probably miss your home and family."

"I do but I can make this my home and find my new family here." You smile

Shuri smiled as well. She was lucky to have a friend devoted as you, especially moving to a whole new country.

"Thank you really. Have a goodnight."

"You too Shuri."

Shuri closes her bedroom door and you walk back to your room. You close the door behind you and go to the window. You take a look at the city with lights in buildings, majority dimmed and majority turned off. You felt fortunate that you would be seeing this view every night from now on.

You walk to your bed and settle in under the blankets. You look up at the ceiling and sighed with a smile on your face.

Maybe staying Wakanda for a long time wouldn't be so dreadful after all as you thought.

Let me know if you want to be tagged in part 2 and 3!

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pleaseeeimjustagirl · 3 months

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♡Weekly Chronicles♡

Hey babes! I haven't done a weekly chronicle in so longgg but I have some good updates because I missed you girlies<3 Welcome to my new girliesss!

♡Education♡

The semester has officially started and so far I like all my classes. I decided to do 18 credits worth of classes this semester and I didn't realize how busy my schedule would be until last week lol. I'm trying to find a way to reorganize my schedule because babes it is a lot. I have a bunch of items I need to get a few textbooks I will try and order this week but other than that it has been very simple since it is the first full week of the semester I don’t expect them to do too much. I hope all my college girlies are doing well let's buckle in and get this semester done so we can be hot girls all summer lol. Side note there is this really cute guy in a few classes near me and I see him all the time he is soooo cute lol he's blonde and tall I had a math class with him I believe a year ago never said anything to him and I don’t plan he’s just cute lol.

♡Mental♡

I have been great mentally. So far this year I have been super organized when it comes to my goals and habits so it has made me feel secure knowing I am going down the right path. I need to pay for my refill of my antidepressants I like to call them my happy pills. They have helped me a lot these past 3 months because I remember last year around this time I was so depressed Seasonal depression affected my motivation and goals, so I didn't accomplish much. Thankfully this year is different. Also, I've been working on saying more affirmations I sometimes have a tough time looking in the mirror, especially around the time of my period but I'm constantly reminding myself I'm beautiful self-love is a continuous journey and to be patient.

♡Physical♡

I have been sticking to my diet plan! It has been working I've been seeing major results of course I have slip-ups sometimes but I get right back on and I don't judge myself because I'm human and weight loss will not be linear. I can’t wait to reach my goal I still have more pounds to go but I got this! I've been super strict on my skincare routine and I've been seeing results with that as well my dark spots are slowly fading and I'm super happy. I recently cut my hair so I’m on a hair growth journey now. So if you have any tips especially if you have 4a, 4b, and 4c hair I'd love some tips below, and even if you don’t please share babes<3

♡Hobbies♡

My schedule has been super hectic. So now I'm trying to figure out how to organize my hobbies into my schedule but also trying to keep balance so I don't become overwhelmed. Pilates has been amazing I love the burn it's so addictive I can’t wait to get back into weightlifting in the second quarter of the year! I want to learn how to create flower arrangements so I can keep fresh flowers in my home. I'm still looking into new hobbies so I can have some excitement in my life outside of school. I tried some hobbies during the break and realized certain hobbies aren’t for me and some are. Also, I have been on it with my Italian! By the end of this year, I want to be bilingual. Every time I practice it makes me want to book a trip to Italy just to speak Italian with Italians lol.

I love chatting with you babes and want you girlies to chat back<3 so let me know what you have planned this week and how was your weekend Love you babes we are almost at 200 followers<3

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nanimoshiranaikoneko · 2 months

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Hello Tumblr

i have been on the platform since 2012 but i have never actually wrote any posts so i finally made a decision to create a new personal account (even tho that account have been created and been empty since 2020 but these last four years were hard for everyone). I graduated from a university in 2021 and got a translator degree but due to various reasons (in the world and in general) it was hard to apply it in job searching. and i've been feeling super lost and depressed all these years. and i decided to give a chance my small coding dream since i had since high school (in my country we need to pass entry exams at school and my computer science teacher prohibited me even trying passing the exam and during that time i was listless and AGAIN a lost teenager who had no idea what to do with their life so i didn't even try fighting and just gave up the idea and chose a path of my other passion: languages /after graduation i picked up japanese so i keep learning new stuff and it helps me a lot to cope ig/) so here i am just turned 26 this month and started learning how to code last month only. i had a slight idea of how html worked plus we had python usage in linguistic at university (for some reason it was super weird lol) i have been practicing for 10 days straight so i thought it's gonna be a good idea to participate in 100 days of coding as almost a complete beginner and track my progress (plus i haven't actually been practicing english that much so it is also a good reason to start that blog) so my progress in the last 10 days looks like that: 1. revised html basics 2. started css journey

i use online video courses on Youtube by freeCodeCamp.org and creating an actual web styling with a tutor does actually help a lot! i enjoy studying but i do understand that i need much more time to practice myself

after i am planning to start JavaScript but we'll see how it will go and i am still not sure which path to choose but ig front-end sympathise me a lot plus i am planning to pass JLPT N3 this year so maybe i will post some updates too but i am not sure yet is it better to participate in summer or winter exam i don't think anyone will be interested in my journey but when i see people posting their progress in any sphere it inspires me a lot

#10/100 days #personal #long post #100 days of code #codeblr #langblr #japanese #html css #beginner #100 days #hello tumblr #koneko codes

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otakween · 28 days

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Digimon Tamers - Volume 4

The beginning of this volume flat out spoils things by putting characters that haven't been introduced yet on the character page. (MarineAngemon, the Juri clone, the D-Reaper queen...) Maybe that's a common practice with shounen manga...but it shouldn't be. Like, what's the point?

Ch. 22

Lopmon and Terriermon interacting will never get old. Love how they lift their ears with curiosity when they first see each other.

I think I prefer experiencing the ~sad~ part of Tamers better in manga form. I remember it being quite drawn out in the anime and I rather just blitz through it at this point. I think the whole Leomon death storyline just annoys me because they barely developed his character and then the writing expects me to be devastated. Juri was more developed, sure, but we barely got any insight into her relationship with Leomon so her deep, dark depression doesn't feel super warranted either.

Ch. 23

I think this chapter was pretty well done. They're giving an epic battle it's time instead of zooming past it.

It bugs me that there isn't a specific name for digimon/human digivolutions. In this translation they called it a "true mega form." On the wiki it's called both an ultimate and a matrix digivolution. IDK why it doesn't count as a jogress. I guess there's like...two different things: the way you digivolve (matrix) and the digivolution level (ultimate)? If it's confusing for me, I can only imagine it'd be confusing for a kid.

It's a bit weird for an English translation, but I like that Guilmon says "MMA!" a lot. I can totally hear him making that noise with his OG voice. Creative onomatopoeia.

Ch. 24

Grrr Jian said "crumbcakes," so done with this stupid translation

This chapter was hella short, not much to say about it.

Ch. 25

Okay, now they're calling it a "biomerge digivolution." I guess the localizers also thought "this needs a cool name!"

Casual 90s/early 2000s sexism sprinkled throughout this translation. Takato says he "screams like a little girl" in a previous chapter and in this one he says "easy to forget Renamon and Rika are girls when they're always kicking butt!" Eye roll...

SaintGalgomon looked super badass but for some reason when Sakuyamon appeared they chose to dedicate two closeup panels to her chest and high heels? Sus...

Ch. 26

Juri's face didn't look as sinister here as it did in the anime (when it's revealed she's possessed). I guess that's probably a good thing. More subtle.

I don't remember the sovereign digimon giving Culumon a "you're a real boy now" speech in the anime. That was sweet.

They cut the part where Beelzebumon gets zapped by a bunch a digimon. In this he just collapses after the battle with Dukemon, which I think I prefer. (But why'd he say he'd be "bunny chow?" He wasn't even fighting Terriermon...)

Ch. 27

The grotesque, over-the-top facial expressions the artist keeps drawing for Hirokazu piss me off. They're just so ugly.

Ugh...they really had to ruin a serious moment (Guilmon getting the ark to stop) with a poop joke. This manhua does NOT treat its audience with respect.

Hmm they completely cut out Juri's family. So much for developing her character I guess.

They kind of forgot to imply that the ark is sentient. I mean they showed it stopping on its own, but in the anime they really hammered it home by having Guilmon have a conversation with it and showing it's HAL-like eye. That was one of my fave parts so I'm sad lol

Ch. 28

Okay, this is starting to feel totally different from the anime, they skipped like 5 episodes worth of content. Also, IDK if the scanlation I'm reading is missing some pages because the ending with Dukemon being beat up was completely nonsensical (it cut from Beelzebumon being hit to a panel with Dukemon outta nowhere?) I'll give it the benefit of the doubt that there are missing pages...

The scene where Beelzebumon uses Leomon's attack to save Juri played out differently here. She doesn't seem particularly perturbed by it and Beelzebumon can't save her because he gets attacked, not because Juri recoils for too long.

Ch. 29/30

Lol they completely cut out Justimon. Makes Ryo's role even more pointless! Ryo doesn't even reappear at all...

This manhua series was crap to begin with but they really screwed the pooch with this ending. SOOO rushed. Grani appeared outta nowhere with zero introduction. Like they just went immediately to Grani's sacrifice. I still don't know if I'm missing pages or if the writing is just that garbage. Oh well! I tried.

#digimon tamers #manhua #digimon

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fairycosmos · 10 months

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chloe do you have any tips on 'forcing' oneself to shower? at the moment it's extremely hard for me not only bc of my depression but my foot is also in a cast bc it's broken which makes showering even more physically taxing.... just i need to shower but can't bring myself to do it 😭

hey honestly ive been thereeeeee and am often still there it's a fucking nightmare and im so sorry you're going through it as well - i know there's a lot of weird stigma and shame around these lesser discussed aspects of depression, but it is truly a massive part of the illness and not smth to internalise or shame yourself for. i've used a few different approaches when i haven't had the motivation to shower in the past - the 1st is just breaking it down into smaller chunks. wash my face, brush my teeth the first day. then slowly build up to either stepping in the shower and letting the water stream over you for 5 minutes, or even giving yourself a sponge bath/washing ur hair over the sink so you dont have to get fully undressed and exert a ton of effort and feel overwhelmed. i think this might be the best option for u with ur foot the way it is. a little is always better than nothing. i live by that TBH. sitting down in the shower also helps me massively, makes it a quite a bit less draining TBH. i also do this thing where i set an alarm for 10 minutes and just tell myself im going to clean myself as much as possible in that time, and that i can manage it because it's only 10 minutes and then i can lay back down and breathe, and that it's not this big deal my brain is building it up to be, and even if it is and even if i cry or panic or feel like shit, it's just 10 minutes. it's also super important to have the self awareness to realise this cycle you're in where neglecting your needs makes you depressed and you're depressed because you neglect your needs (at least that's part of the reason), and learning how to stop that perpetuating by doing one small task for yourself per day is one of the only ways to break out of it. i have to say every time i shower after being in a depression pit i don't regret it, and i know it's very hard to conceptualise that right now, but it's true. another thing i often try is just counting to ten and then forcing my body to move, i literally scream at myself in my own head to ignore my thoughts and just keep moving and just get the fuck in and out of the shower without making it more than what it is, i try to focus purely on my body and being in it and not on my mind - i understand that prob wont work for everyone lol. incentivising yourself is also always a good idea - tell yourself if i manage to take a shower i can watch a show i like or go to sleep or have a nice snack or practice a hobby you enjoy or whatever you like to do. i think training ur brain to see self care as a positive / neutral thing is a vital part of trying to move beyond this. anyway sorry to ramble i think that's a summary of what i usually do but if you ever want to chat more ab this or if you need a friend just give me a message! i hope you feel better soon x

#anon

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ratwednesday · 3 months

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I've been feeling really weird about my art and I haven't fully figured out why. I'm not saying this because I want people to reassure me or whatever, that's not it - but I've been going through weird life changes again, and I think it's affecting my work/my perception of my work.

part of why I said I was going to take the rest of January off post-ANE was because I truly and honestly have not had a *break* break since... I don't even know. maybe not since I moved back in April! I've had constant work all year! I moved, and then I started my monthly print club, and then I found out that I got into anthrocon's artist alley, and then I applied for and found out I got into further confusion and anthro new england, and then I was prepping for those for months, and then I went out of town for christmas and then it was january and now I'm on the other side of all of it.

but also... in November, after a lot of conversations with my partner, I finally talked to my doctor about starting on medication for depression. and like, it's so fucking cliche of me to say this but after almost 6 weeks on them, it *does* feel like a fog has been lifted. and now that I'm on the other side of the holidays and my fixation on prepping for FC and ANE, I'm looking at the owed work that I have waiting for me, and... It's so weird. It's good work. I have good bones here and I know how to finish these projects. And at the same time...

I am so, so aware of the gaps in my knowledge for art. I've wanted to get into doing regular figure drawing and anatomy studies for forever, but haven't made the time. and so the past few days, I've been doing a little of that! It's fun! I'm learning! & I'm in this weird space where I honestly don't recognize a lot of the work I'm doing.!do you ever try on a shirt where you can feel every seam? it's like that. so I've been doing some environment practice and doing things that aren't just characters, and thinking about where I want the art to go next.

anyway. I'm rambling, but. yeah. things are shaking out into a shape I didn't expect. the meds are helping a lot. this is the first week I've had while on them where I'm not also about to go out of town or be super busy, and here's a barrier that was in my brain for years without me realizing it, and now it's not there. and I have things to figure out. and art to create. and a lot of new ideas percolating for pieces and prints I want to try and see if I can make happen.

I'm feeling the learning curve something fierce, though.

#ratchatters

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frogizz · 6 months

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Jin Ling, man I pity the kid.

The Untamed Spoilers (Up to Episode 47)

*I haven't read the novel, I will update this when I do. Also, this is a rant, not some analysis, so this is heavily opinionated on what I just binge watched for the past week.*

Dead parents, raised during a time after war but during the corruption and manipulation lead by his own clan, his clan leader being human scum without him even knowing, his martial uncle being the one to have had killed his parents, bullied because of him being an orphan, raised by his maternal uncle who can't handle his emotions well either.

This kid gave me the impression of an arrogant spoiled kid who always let uncle take care of the messes he creates. But Jin Ling has impressed me and made me feel so bad for his character. He's just a teen, so of course he's going to act like a bit of a brat and be super emotional. But, him being emotional is explained and a little justified. Not just the trauma and the bullying explains and justifies it but so does the fact that he was practically raised by Jiang Cheng, the guy not well known for keeping his temper in check.

Jin Ling gets aggressive and easily on the defense because that's how he had to be his entire life. Emotionally defensive and physically defensive. He especially gets this way with Wei Wuxian, obviously because of what he's been told all his life. That Wei Wuxian is basically the root of all of his problems, he's the one that killed his parents, so he's the cause of all of his trauma right? (I have a separate rant for how I think Wei Wuxian is only half responsible for that).

But, as Jin Ling had an inkling of an idea that Mo Xuanyu was actually Wei Wuxian, he still interacted with him in a somewhat civil way, helping him and defending him, because he was never really hurt directly by him. After finding out that it really was Wei Wuxian, Jin Ling stabs him, as a way to get revenge? Feel justice?

And everything that unfolds after that, both Jin Ling and Jiang Cheng feel conflicted, they want to be mad at Wei Wuxian, they want to still believe that their anger, their grief, their feelings overall are justified, that the impression they've had of this man for years is what they really think. I mean, it's pretty hard to truly believe someone you thought of as a nasty, disgusting, manipulating, lying, malicious killer would actually be a responsible, caring, thoughtful, and very self-sacrificing individual. Of course Jiang Cheng knows all of that, but he can't just let go of the first hand experiences he's had with him all of his life.

Meanwhile, Jin Ling, he's so conflicted with how to feel because what he's been told all of his life is contrasting heavily with what he's personally experienced.

Also, the scene where Wen Ning is trying to see if Lan Sizhui is really Wen Yuan most likely made Jin Ling very cautious, aggressive, angry, and depressed because he was maybe jealous. Jealous that he can't have a nice, touching family reunion like how he did. Well, also because Wen Ning was also the direct cause of his father's death, but besides that, the scene probably felt like a huge slap in the face.

Jin Ling's family history isn't perfect, but he at least has two family members who are willing to protect him and keep him safe (I am of course including Wei Wuxian even though I know he isn't blood family or even considered Jiang Cheng's brother anymore).

I just wish him the best, I wish this kid can learn how to cope better with all of his trauma, that he can grow up to know the full truth about what had all went down.

When he broke down crying in front of everyone, all I wanted to do was jump into the screen and hug him, comfort him. This kid seriously needs a therapist.

#end of rant #mxtx novels #mdzs the untamed #the untamed #jin ling #mdzs spoilers #the untamed spoilers

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wevelocityteampresents-blog · 7 months

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SEPTEMBER 28TH

I found out there was a new online tournament for Pokémon Violet. It's supposed to utilize Pokémon that can be found in Kitakami. With all the practice I've been doing in casual and ranked battles, I should be able to do great once it finally arrives. (I've also been keeping track of the new Pokémon's stats in Pokémon HOME, so I know exactly what to expect.)

For now, I should continue fighting the legendary Pokémon. I arrived at the site where Munkidori was lurking around.

Of course, there had to be a catch to this thing...

He looks BIGGER than usual... After I beat him, I obtained one of Ogerpon's masks. (But that doesn't mean I can use them yet.)

Fezandipiti was next. I thought I would have to fight her on a cliff. But she flew into a nearby cave.

That's one way to catch a Pokémon, I guess...

After I beat Fezandipiti, I only had Okidogi to deal with. I was surprised that he was holding a Liechi Berry. (Or maybe they all have held items. But I finished them off too quickly to notice them.)

After I obtained the last mask, Kieran showed up and told us to go back to Moussi Town for something important.

I'm pretty sure a LOT of people would be lured by your natural charm...

SEPTEMBER 29TH

I finally managed to finish the last redesign. I'm a little disappointed in some aspects of his backview. But it's nothing more drawings can't fix. Now that I'm done redesigning these characters, I should probably move on to that new project of mine.

Today was also the day I remembered that Pac-Man 99 would shut down in a week and a half. Making it the second Akira-developed battle royale title to have its servers shut down. I can understand the reasoning for Super Mario 35's servers to be discontinued. But why would they do this to a game based around Pac-Man? It's not like Namco would want a game like this to have a short shelf life.

And that's another thing. All these battle royale games continue to get curb-stomped, while Tetris 99 is still being updated. What makes Tetris 99 stand out compared to these other games?

I can't even buy any of the offline modes since they stopped accepting purchases for paid DLC. (In preparation of the game's discontinuation, I presume.) So, I guess this game will become useless to me after the 8th passes. What a way to go...

Because I was so focused on work today, I barely had any time for Pokémon.

There was this new mass outbreak event for Clefairy. I already had a better shiny Clefairy. So I was only interested in a regular one that had a mark on it. Sure enough, I caught one! But it wasn't the Clefairy the event advertised...

He's probably the most depressed Clefairy in this field. He's definitely a welcome surprise.

SEPTEMBER 30TH

I haven't done anything with these characters in such a long time... It's a good thing I've gotten better at drawing them!

Compared to yesterday, I got a decent amount of playtime for Pokémon Violet.

Before I returned to Moussi Town, I tried wonder trading to try my hand at getting more cool Pokémon. After a few trades, I received a shiny Bruxish.

I've been getting a lot of legitimate shiny Pokémon through Wonder Trades in this game lately. That gives me hope that it's starting to become usable outside of Pokémon HOME and Pokémon Brilliant Diamond Version. (I'm still expecting a few stinkers...)

I wanted to go to the Pokémon Center for something. But I forgot that I was entering Moussi Town and activated a new cutscene.

I thought the townspeople were going to attack Ogerpon. Guess I was wrong.

After they apologized to Ogerpon, I was told to take her back to her cave. Sadly, I didn't have time for that because I was too busy playing with some other people.

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whimsicalweepingwillows · 1 year

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Henlo there, all you people!!

My name's Ally, and I have a MIGHTY NEED for some new pen pals/moots in my life. I'm happily taken, and only looking for friends 😌

I'm a 24 (25 next month, but we're gonna ignore that 😭) year old bi chick from the North Eastern U. S. of A.

Here's a fact list about me, so you can see if I'm too weird for ya right off the bat!

Let's seeee...

- I own a cat named Eleanor Rigby who we nickname Smelly, and a gerbil named Buttercup

- I have a partner named Michael who is in like 90% of the stories I tell 💕

- I'm a stoner and have had a few trips 😁

- I've been a practicing neopagan witch for over 8 years, but have had to take a few big breaks due to mental health, so I'm still learning some basics

- I have a trillion hobbies, including crochet, painting (water color, gauche, acrylic), drawing/sketching, writing, (a very small amount of) sewing, art journaling, collaging, and I'm slowly getting back into gaming and reading!

- I've had a few hyperfixations in my past including (but not limited to) Gorillaz, Hetalia, WWE, Doctor Who, Firefly, Doctor Horrible's Sing-A-Long Blog, Buffy, Invader Zim, Nightmare Before Christmas, Set it Off, WoW, and more

- I always like learning about new topics and hobbies, so please tell me about what you like to do!! I adore creative souls

- I almost always have dyed hair

- I have a side nose ring and no tats yet, but I'm soooo looking to get more!!

- I have a bit of a vulture culture side to me, but I will Never show anything like that unless I ask first or know that you don't mind

- I've recently been getting back into music, and I would LOVE to find friends with similar tastes!! I love pop punk, grunge, 80's/90's pop/punk/alt, and I've been getting more into rap and metal. I'm more than happy to share youtube playlists!

- I love Sci-Fi and Fantasy, and used to dress up to go to ren faires and comic cons! I haven't been able to go out much recently, but I hope to again soon!

- I would love to get back into writing and photography

- I can be a bit of a chatterbox, and I'm always there to be a listening ear if it's needed

- I'm super interested in learning more about: D&D/table top games in general, gaming, graphic novels, any art styles/mediums, sci-fi/fantasy media, ... Honestly everything and anything 😂

- I have depression, anxiety, and PTSD, but I try to stay as positive about life as possible

So there's that! I would absolutely Love to hear from any friends who feel a connection! I'm also super interested in snail mail pen pals, or even any discord chats. Here's some of my creations, too!!

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i-lovethatforme · 2 years

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Heyyyyy!!! just wondering if u have any new fic recs that isnt too depressing???? like new ones w smut or fluff in themm? bcs i felt like ive consumed every petermj fic ever and maybe ive missed some fics that has been newly uploaded kinda? (also really not looking for too depressing bcs life is shit to me lately and im looking for some cheer up) THANK UUU SO MUCHHHH and have a good dayyyy!!!

hi!!! so sorry you're not feeeling great and i hope it gets so much better for you babyfaceeeeee. ummm i haven't read a lot at all lately, like so so sorry but here are a few of my faves and a few i read recently! all fluffy no depression here thanks SO MUCH everyone.

changing channels - RedAmbition: 35k soulmates ty! there might be a bit of angst in here.. but so CUTE.

growing together series - @coykoii: practically as fluffy as jill can get post otter fic... sequel when x

bridges series - @befehlvonganzunten: have rec'd this before, will rec it again so serious good day god bless

5 times Peter gets lost and 1 time he is found - anon: super cute!

Cleanup On Aisle Three - @awakening5: fluffy! smutty! and a... one shot? wake? you okay? xxxxxxxx

Fanart: Don't drop me, bugboy - @machiavelien: my babies :( when someone writes the fic xxxx

With The Click Of A Button - @justmattycakes: fluffy! a little baby angst as a treat but it's not sad!

Nobody Has Time for Roller Derby - sevenimpossiblethings: one of my faves! everyone is bi xxxxxxx

the things i would like to tell you - me: the fluff as is my RIGHT.

hope you like some of these! hope you feel better! 💝💝💝💝

#spideychelle #petermj #fic recs #ask

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lantur · 1 year

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I typed up a whole long tumblr post since I haven't written in a while and wanted to process my feelings, and then my laptop froze and shut down and it got deleted lmao. So here's the quick verson:

wins,

Made homemade chicken stock for the first time ever last Thursday - a cooking milestone for me! I was so happy with how it turned out.

Had a wonderful weekend with Derek playing so much of our favorite board game, Spirit Island, together. <3

Delivered a presentation / training to a class of professionals about the disease I work with, and it went SO well - totally worth working 6-8 pm on Tuesday night.

Finished writing a proposal about why my job deserves to continue having its grant funding renewed for the next 2 years. The proposal was almost 10 pages long and I am very proud of myself for finishing and submitting ahead of time. The due date is tomorrow and I submitted on Tuesday.

Have been consistent with my yoga practice all month. <3

Loving Abbott Elementary!

struggles,

Spent most of last week very depressed.

Have spent most of this week mildly depressed to the point it feels like I have a cold. I have super low energy and low motivation. Doing anything feels like pulling teeth.

Had a breakthrough after therapy today, realizing that a lot of my current struggles stem from needing something new, needing a fresh start, after four solid months of struggle with my mental health and the (related) constant deterioration of my family situation.

I won't get a fresh start with my family. But I can get new creative projects and outlets. I think that it's time for me to get back to the scrapbooking project I started earlier this year. It's also time for another new creative project. I have been longing to write something lenghty and complicated like delicate again, but the fic inspiration is not there. Maybe it's finally time, after 15+ years of writing fanfiction, to try writing an original story, just for fun, even if no one else ever reads it.

There are things about my current situation that I can't change, and I need / it's time for me to change the things I can.

#lanturing

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sincerely-sofie · 6 months

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Check-in for October 25th, 2023

Welp, The Present is a Gift has officially broken 8,000 words and is rapidly approaching the 10k mark! Also, fun fact: according to the outline, I haven't even finished writing the first chapter. This terrifies me when I consider the later chapters which have way more plot packed into them.

Despite me writing out a very detailed plan for the project, it feels like I'm learning new things about the characters with every sentence I write. Twig is apparently a big fan of learning weird, obscure words and is sad that her old hobby of reading dictionaries has been dampened by her struggling to learn how to read footprint runes. You think you know a gal...

I spent most of today working on programming assignments and even got a nice comment on a past submission I sent in. In it, I mentioned single vs. double equals signs always tripping me up and causing bugs in my code--- turns out they used to baffle my instructor too! He's able to use them in their proper places without thinking now, which is encouraging. Regardless, I have never felt this audio more keenly than today:

youtube

I had planned on getting some practice with 3D modeling for low-poly V-tuber of my persona I've been jokingly working on, but that didn't work out as anticipated. I did spend a while admiring how I went from a giant gray cube to this, though:

Ahhh. Look at that beautiful skeleton. So few polygons. So few worries. If only I could figure out how make the pupils move or make a bow.

I also spent a while reminiscing about how Blender lit up in flames at one point and I didn't understand why it happened or how I got it to stop. That was a fun seven minutes of unadulterated terror.

I'm tempted to get back into Blockbench for its simple UI, but after learning the basics of Blender, I know it'd be unbearable to return to the rigidity of working in a program that's pretty much built for Minecraft modders. I just need to stick with Blender and find a few more tutorials to keep me going.

I will miss the fact that Blockbench automatically puts your model on a turntable and offers to pixelate it for you, though. It makes low poly modeling so cool so fast.

Just look at these things! They're so cool! I made them yet they look like something out of my fave childhood video games!

I tried to figure out Super Mario Paint this morning and ended up with my first finished song from that program. Tried importing a few soundfonts from other sources but had no luck getting them to work, and the song was definitely rough around the edges--- but I'm still really proud of myself for making a quick tune! It was a battle to figure out how to export the finished product, and I ended up just recording my desktop with OBS to get it to capture the sound and video together, then converted that video into an MP3 file. It was a very roundabout process, but still!!! I made a thing!

The Shy Guy and Boo instruments, as their flawless character designs may have you suspect, are vastly superior to everything else contained in the program. You can't change my mind.

Also, I was tinkering around with Chrome Extensions and found the most heartbreaking note in the description for one of them.

Tiny Sidebar developer, whoever you are, wherever you are--- I want to give you a hug and a slice of cake or two. Reading this activated my inner anime protagonist and I want you to know that there are so many good people out there, but they're quiet about their goodness. Bad people are just loud as heck and make scenes wherever they go.

With that sudden sappiness, I'm signing off on this check-in. Take a parting teaser for a future joke animatic as a palette cleanser. Depressed Friend will be Twig, Emotionally Stable Friend will be Celebi.

Sincerely, Sofie

#sofie checks in #3D model #3d modeling #blender3d #low poly #low poly art #mario paint #super mario paint #preptober #nanowrimo rebel #nano rebel #The Present is a Gift AU Update

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heavenlypaper · 8 months

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🐠 why i love (or hate) this hobby

🎹 the worst roleplay trend i ever saw

🚙 the one thing i will never do in roleplay

🖼 my favorite types of characters

🛍 the one thing i wish all of my followers knew about me

Send me a symbol

🐠 I've been told this is a good thing but I recently noticed I get stronge muse for Konan when my depression is on a certain wavelength/active. I don't know the exact reason but if I had to guess the reason it would be this.

I dont self insert, but because Konan is a depressed character, even if she is much more reasonably depressed than my own brain, she is easy to navigate and express sad feelings. But there is also something that gravitates me towards her even outside of RP. This character means so much to me, and the extent of which I love this character is strange even to me.

Aside from that, I absolutely love the connections I can make here, both for my muse and for me out of character. I love seeing the other things people can come up with and it's so cool how alot of times it take two people to make a really cool idea. How you can make two characters who haven't had much interaction and make an interaction that feels correct.

But what I do hate is how much energy writing does take. Aside from my energy just being very low all the time, writing takes up alot so it's partially why I'm not super active the way I used to be.

But I also hate how very easy it is to run into certain practices and behaviors that are beyond annoying amongst writers. Such as heavy self insertion and changing a character beyond recognition. I hate the entitlement some have and the policing that often happens.

🎹Worst Rp trend? I'm not even sure what counts as a trend in roleplay. Maybe super tiny text? It make it difficult to read things and is very unnecessary.

🚙 One thing I'll never do is heavy self insertion, or accept heavy self insertion. It makes things very messy IC and OOC

🖼 Listen. Listen to me well.

You see Konan? Look at her. She's a bad bitch. Claire Redfield? Bad bitch

If I cannot say "it's the bad bitch of the hour" the second they come on screen. They may not be for me. I also like incredibly angsty, depressed, traumatized characters who have shown or show heavy compassion towards others. Even if they are a villain.

🛍 Lastly. I... don't know what I would want my followers to know. I feel like I'm pretty easy and open to understanding? I may talk like a tough shit but I'm actually a really awkward, and don't like hurting people's feelings even when they deserve it. I'm getting better at being outspoken when I need to be, but I still want to be kind.

I just like making people laugh.

#thatsneakymedic

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madzilla84 · 2 years

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So I finally bought a replica of The Robe from OFMD and wanted to write about it a bit (…a lot) and thought it was probably too long for an endless thread of tweets so here we are.

SO when I first got into the show (April) there wasn’t a proper replica of the breakup/depression/confidence robe readily available, only the fabric (though the existence of that was a bit of a mystery as the costume designers for the show said it was super expensive and they’d bought out all of it and only had enough to make one robe, so this newer fabric is probably a lower-quality copy). I nearly bought the fabric then but the idea of having to commission someone to make it, mail them the fabric, find the lining fabric too … eh, it just seemed like way too much of a hassle (not to mention way too expensive). But then the same seller that sold the fabric (Theblockprints) also started selling the robe itself! Buuuut it was still pretty expensive (though much less expensive than the fabric & commission route), so back in May I opened the Etsy tab and … left it sitting there until last week when I FINALLY caved (because the weather was getting cooler, probably). I spent ages looking at other listings and reading reviews/looking at all the review pics on Etsy (luckily there are lots), and decided to go for it based on the multiple excellent reviews and pics.

ANYWAY it got here incredibly fast - just under a week, from India! I got the 48” version as I am a shortarse, and it comes to mid-calf; the 57” would have been dragging on the floor, I’m pretty sure. It has kimono sort of sleeves rather than the square ones in the show but they still look good and I actually prefer that the drop is slightly less extreme (it’s more practical). The sleeves are a good length on me, surprisingly - it has the darts in the back, the 4 tassels, and it even has a pocket! (Inside)

OK, first impressions:

It’s a bit lighter (in colour) than I expected, and particularly a kinda - lower contrast of the design. Like, it almost looks a bit faded, but then, that’s potentially just what it looks like, because it seems to have a bit of a chameleon thing going on in different lighting...

I took photos in both natural and non-natural light and it looks quite different in both; also people take pics of theirs in different lighting for reviews, and of course TV shows both have very different lighting in different scenes *and* post-production Studio Magic, so it can be really hard to tell how “accurate” it is (or indeed, if all of the ones sold by the same shop are the same fabric, or if they have different ‘runs’ that look different).

The design is somewhat less crisp than I expected with less contrast (though again that varies on lighting), buuuut part of that might be that it’s velvet vs the canvas material of the tote bag I got recently… but, the second most recent review on Etsy is actually saying the same thing, that they bought a pillow in the same fabric from the same shop and the fabric was much more vibrant and crisp. (However, the *most* recent review, from today, is saying that it’s fantastic and perfect, no notes, 10/10, so I reckon people might just have different expectations/standards etc? And if you don’t have anything to compare it to on hand, then… maybe you wouldn’t notice?)

Like even on the show, it looks quite light in places (e.g. Ed singing on the deck) and darker in others, like the blanket fort scene, but of course that’s totally different lighting.

I haven't colour or contrast-adjusted any of the photos I took but even without that it can be tricky, as you'll see. (tumblr does eff up the quality of images a bit, sorry about that) It also looks much better at a distance, as you'd expect, but there isn't much less of a distance you can have from something than wearing it, lol.

this is the robe on my bed, in a room without natural lighting (the curtains were closed, the light was on). this is a really good pic! maybe i just need to only wear it in the dark.

tote bag vs robe. the tote bag is canvas, mind you

left - natural lighting, right, non-natural lighting

(this pic is especially maddening and is here as an example, because both these pics above were taken in the exact same spot at the same time, no filters or changed lighting or anything, I just moved my phone a bit and this is how different the pics looked. Phone cameras adjust depending on angle, light, reflections, colour, all sorts, so even the same time in the same place isn't consistent. -_- )

----

I’m no dressmaking expert but it seems well made. The tassels are lovely, a gorgeous colour, though a bit ratty in places, nothing a lil trim won’t help a bit.

Like. I didn’t expect it to be *identical* because it’s not made by the same people, didn’t cost as much as a full screen-accurate replica would, and I knew the design was a bit different based on the reviews and photos … and it *is* very nice indeed. I’m just - not sure it’s nice *enough* to be worth what it costs, which is A Lot. Based on the costume designer’s description of the cost of the original fabric, I’m sure that would have been higher print quality, which is to be expected.

I don’t think I regret buying it exactly, and it’s still the best option there is out there (aside from a full private commission which is definitely out of my price range), but I guess I’m just saying, manage your expectations. If you’re not expecting screen-identical look *and* quality, it’s great! Is it £150 great? Well, that’s up to you. Maybe?

It’s very comfy, though. Fits (me) great. I was a bit worried it’d be too heavy but it isn’t at all, it’s a nice weight. The lining isn’t silky but a hot pink cotton, feels nice, especially as I’m not gonna be wandering around shirtless in it like Ed did, lol. I’d be wearing it now, probably, except it’s pretty warm today, darn it.

So, to finish, do I like it? I do like it a lot. It’s nice quality overall and it’s a fun thing to have, a little piece of my favourite show (kinda). I’m a *little* disappointed that it doesn’t, to my eyes at least, look as vibrant as I’d hoped (except when it does, when it's not so bright out), but I honestly can’t tell how “inaccurate” that makes it because of lighting etc. I do think they’re possibly cheaping out a bit on the fabric/print for the robes vs smaller items like pillows and such to save $$, but I couldn’t prove that without seeing multiple robes (and pillows) together in person or something.

Would I recommend it? Well, if you want one and can’t afford to commission one (and honestly even if you did, you might still get this same fabric if you ordered it from the same shop) and can afford this one, then yes; you’re not gonna find a better option because there currently isn’t one.

And... actually, as a lil update, I've spent so long writing this that it's gotten a bit darker/overcast outside and the colour actually does look a bit more vibrant/accurate (or I'm incepting myself), so maybe the slight shininess of it is a factor in bright lighting/daylight?? I dunno man!

It is a beautiful, lush robe. If I'm gonna be a sad bitch, at least I can be a sad bitch ~in style~ <3

#ofmd #our flag means death #that merch life #this is so hard to review because it looks different every time i look at it sdklksjdlk #it's super comfy tho

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finnlongman · 1 year

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u seem so passionate and as someone who doesn't have a Great Passion in life I am v curious abt that. do u think u were always bound to be interested in writing & medieval Irish literature, regardless of what happened? if u didn't have them, do u think u would have developed different, equally strong Passions (i.e do u think u are just "wired" for passion)? or would u have "missed the boat" so to speak if u didn't come across them? (+ do u have advice for someone like me, w/o a "Great Passion"?)

Oh, that's a really interesting question. I often wonder what would have happened if my grandma hadn't given me The New Policeman and sparked my interest in folklore and trad music that eventually led me to medieval lit, that's for sure.

I do think I'm wired for passion, because I seem utterly incapable of having casual hobbies. Everything I do, I kind of throw myself into, which is not always sensible or practical. I have a history of taking up a new hobby, getting super into it for a year or so (to the point of planning a career or at least a competitive hobby around it), and then moving on to something else. So although I often circle back to the previous hobbies, my past is still littered with those I've abandoned...

I have a deeply all-or-nothing personality, which can be destructive at times. I'm also, frankly, incapable of spending time on anything that bores me, so if it doesn't grab the "all", it gets the "nothing", and I drop it almost immediately. I suspect I may have ADHD, although I haven't been diagnosed, and this seems to be reflected in the way I'll bounce around a handful of different things that I care deeply about, because if I try and do the same thing for too long, I'll get bored and drop it, and things I don't care much about can't grab my interest enough to let me bounce to them.

Hence, as well as medieval Irish literature I also write novels in a range of genres, and between edits for one novel I'll run off and write something completely different, and when I'm not doing that I'm in the dance studio, etc etc. This is a recipe for burnout, and I have chronic pain and fatigue already, so I'm not saying this is a good thing. Just that it seems to be how I'm wired.

But sometimes I feel I care too passionately about too many different things, and I envy those who have One Thing that they're good at, and can focus on, and which they don't periodically have to run away from for a few months so they don't break their interest in it forever.

I don't think there's anything wrong with not being a super intense all-or-nothing kind of person – many therapists would say it's better not to be, as you'll be less inclined to take a "boom and bust" approach to life, i.e. wildly overcommitting to things until you burn out/injure yourself/have a breakdown because you didn't know when to stop. There is a lot to be said for having a casual interest in many things!

That said, if you're finding it super hard to be interested in anything and everything's leaving you cold... you MIGHT be depressed. I've been there. So just worth thinking about. But if you're just Normal Levels of Interested in things, that is completely okay! Not everybody is a hyperfocusing weirdo like me!

Finally, it might just be that you haven't found your thing yet. I didn't really get into the Ulster Cycle properly until final year undergrad, even though I'd been into medieval Irish lit from the start, and it wasn't until I started engaging with it creatively (i.e. writing To Run With The Hound) that I started getting really emotionally invested on more than an academic level. It just needed the right moment and the right circumstances to click.

My advice is to keep exploring what interests you, keep finding new ways to engage with the things that interest you, and don't be afraid to bounce around and try out different ones. But some people are more restrained in their passions and that's not a bad thing – it may even be a good thing in many ways.

#anon good sir #answered

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dailydaemons · 2 years

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30-day dæmian challenge

I completed @riverclanning's dæmian challenge over in the TDF discord server, and I figured I would put my responses over here as well. Lots of text so I will put it under a cut.

Day 1: Daemon name and meaning/origin: As far as I am aware, Ayeoh doesn't necessarily mean anything on its own, it was something I made up, not found, but it does have personal meaning. It is a name that is special to me because it holds a connection to my alterhumanity which made me want to try out daemonism. The name Ayeoh comes from my Star Wars D&D campaign and my player character. My PC has their own companion, a BD droid with the designation IO-113 - typically shortened to "IO" and pronounced Ayeoh. I played around with the spelling and considered spellings like "Eyeoh, Ayoh, Ahyoh, etc.," but settled on the spelling 'Ayeoh' because I felt the letters were most accurate with how one would pronounce the letters "I-O" together. Ayeoh seems pretty happy with this name, so unless something significant happens I doubt he will want to change it. He does however say that he likes both Ayeoh and IO as spellings.

Day 2: More than one dæmon? + opinion: My only dæ is Ayeoh, and I personally can't see myself ever wanting more than one dæmon. Philosophically, I like the idea that dæmons are a part of the dæmian's soul, so having multiple facets of my soul running around sounds a little silly to me. Practice-wise, I'm still learning how to work with one dæ, and Ayeoh is needy as is, I can't imagine trying to foster and grow a second one of him. Yea I'm needy, you love me though. If having multiple dæmons works for others then I'm all for that. I would be interested to read others' philosophies and reasons as to why they have/want more than one dæmon, for the sake of curiosity.

Day 3: Favorite, Personal, and Comfort forms: Ayeoh primarily takes a gray fox form, changing very infrequently at this point. I don't think either one of us particularly has forms we find comforting, but Ayeoh has taken a mountain lion form as a sort of 'protective' form. I am not sure about personal forms, most of the forms Ayeoh has tried he has lost interest in. His gray fox form is a mix of TDF analytical, symbolism, and personal symbolism, so I am not sure if that counts as a "personal" form or just symbolic - I consider it symbolic. I do think that the gray fox is his favorite form overall, he pretty much picked it himself, and the more I thought about the form and the possible symbolism the more it aligned with myself.

Day 4: What is your symbolic form? I use a weird mix of analytical, symbolic, and personal symbolism to understand Ayeoh's form. I don't think I want to go super deep into what the symbolism is and how it applies to me here because I imagine it will be pretty long, but maybe I will do a full write-up for Tumblr or the forum at some point.

Day 5: What is your analytic form? I am not sure, I haven't dug deep into the analytic form-finding system to really say. Ayeoh's gray fox form fits, kinda, there are some large traits that I think would make me not a gray fox from an analytic standpoint, but I do think enough of it still applies that it's not completely off the table. Coyotes fit better but are not 100% perfect. I don't really think I will be diving very deep into analytic forms to find one that fits me completely. Maybe one day I will do some kind of RA or research for it, but right now I don't feel a desire to. ----- At the time of writing this was my feelings but at this point, I do consider Ayeoh's gray fox form as also analytical; but mostly that it is just his form. Through a lot of self analysis and getting a better understanding of ourselves, we figured out that gray foxes fit us incredibly well within the analytical system.

Day 6: How does having a daemon help you? Do you do anything for your dae? Ayeoh has been a large source of comfort for me. When I feel especially depressed or alone, he is there being supportive - it feels like a mix of someone else giving me comfort, and a way for me to give nonjudgmental care to my inner Self and positive self-talk when things feel especially bad. He is softer to me than I am to myself, always reassuring, and reminds me that it is okay for me to feel things. I am not really sure how I would do things to help Ayeoh. As of now, he doesn't really have needs, and the things he likes or wants tend to be things that I want but don't often indulge in. Taking care of Ayeoh is like an extension of taking care of myself; for example, going on walks.

Day 7: Daemon favorite aesthetics: I don't know what Ayeoh's favorite aesthetic would be, I think it would really depend on the mood and he could easily fit within any of my personal aesthetics. For me, my favorite aesthetics are cyberpunk (both black jacket and pink mohawk), ghost-hunter/cryptid-hunter (flannel, leather jackets, eclectic mysticism, tarot cards, etc.), and star wars sci-fi. The least fitting aesthetic is sci-fi, but Ayeoh also has a droid form that he takes, so, he can even fit within that idea lol.

Day 8: What is your relationship like? Ayeoh's and my relationship is very loving and caring. We both love each other, and he puts in a lot of effort to make me feel cared for and safe. He will find every excuse to snuggle with me, and tries he tries his best to be a comforting force.

Day 9: How often and how clearly do you project them? I try to project Ayeoh as often as I can, whenever I remember I make sure to project him. Most of the time he is projected in my mind's eye, where I internally know where he is and what he is doing, how he looks, etc., He looks pretty detailed and I can 'see' him clearly most times.

Day 10: What is your daemon's voice like? This one is a little unclear because I still have not made much progress on clear separation between Ayeoh and I. From what I can tell he does have a deeper, masculine voice with my same accent, which I imagine probably looks a little funny coming out of a handsome fox, but it seems right.

Day 11: What do you and your dae like to do together? We especially love going on walks or being out in nature, it is our favorite thing to do together. Watching a show or movie is also nice, otherwise, we just like spending general time together even if we aren't doing something specific. I don't know if there are things we especially hate, but Ayeoh tends to be more outward with his distastes and annoyances when things are irritating, especially when I have to put on a happy face.

Day 12: If you are AltH, how does being a daemian interact with your kintype identities? Being otherkin was actually what spurred me to try daemonism because I wanted to use it as a way to feel more connected to a specific kintype (along with other things). I am not sure how successful I have been with that goal specifically, but I am still exploring how daemonism interacts with my otherkin identities. It has been fun to project daemonism onto my kintypes though, and explore AUs for the fun of it, especially regarding my OC kintype.

Day 13: Do you own any items that remind you of your dae? Intentionally? No. I think I want to get a daemon coin made at some point, it would be nice to have a physical object I can fidget with that represents Ayeoh. Unintentionally? Yessir. I never really felt a connection to foxes, but for some reason I have a number of items with foxes on them. I have a cute fox mug, a little ceramic fox figurine, and a leather coin purse that is styled like a fox. Granted - they are all red foxes, not gray foxes, but general foxyness tends to be close enough.

Day 14: Missing Question

Day 15: What is your best memory with your dæmon? Definitely the time Ayeoh thanked me for talking with him. It was such a brief moment, but it was incredibly sweet and I could feel his love at that moment.

Day 16: Does anyone irl know about dæmonism? No, nobody I am close to knows about my dæmon or dæmonism, and other than maybe one friend I doubt I will tell anybody.

Day 17: Favorite HDM character? Probably Lee and Hester. I really love their relationship, and Lee is just a fun character overall. Coram and Sophie are also up there as favorites.

Day 18: HDM canon Considering there really doesn't seem to be any "rules" specifically stated in the books other than 'everyone has a dæmon,' no, my headcanons and beliefs about dæs and dæmonism don't line up with the novels. I like using the novels as a baseline for my headcanons and practice, but I don't feel compelled to follow the books. I think that the way I go/went about finding my dæs form is more akin to the way it is done in the books though.

Day 19: If you could live in a world with corporeal dæmons, would you? If magic happened in this world and everyone suddenly had a dæmon, yes I would want that to happen lol. If I was plane-hopping and needed to leave my life to have a dæ, then probably not. As sad as it can be that my dæmon isn't corporeal, I don't think I would want to leave my whole life behind.

Day 20: Does your dæmon interact with religion/spirituality? I consider myself an eclectic Jew, I grew up Jewish but now I like to include other spiritual and witchy practices into my own spiritual worldview. Ayeoh's existence is more spiritual for me, I do see him as an aspect or facet of my Soul/Self, he is not just an imaginary friend. My spirituality does not really play role in my daily life, so Ayeoh has not been included in my practices thus far, but I do think he would want to assist in some way, or at least would find it fun to be included when I do some kind of practice.

Day 21: Dæmons, what do you think of your person? Skipping for now because I am still not very skilled at separating Ayeoh's words from my own.

Day 22: How are you and your dæ's personalities different? I think I have talked about it before, but Ayeoh's key personality traits are generally made up of the parts of my personality that are there, but difficult to access or express. Boldness, pride, being emotionally expressive, and being a vessel for self-love/patience., are some of his largest traits so far.

Day 23: How long has your dæmon existed? Not very long. Ayeoh's CIEday was 4/13/22 (homestuck day, tragic /j).

Day 24: Has your dæ ever disappeared? No, he hasn't disappeared, there have been points where he is a lot quieter though, or is projected a lot less and it is usually a result of my mental headspace being not great at the time.

Day 25: How does your dæmon interact with the world? Ayeoh is typically passively projected, as in I usually have an internal sense/view in my mind's eye of where he is or what he is doing without me putting a lot of focus on projecting him. He most often interacts with scenery or directly with me. He avoids touching other people, and cannot interact with items. He does occasionally watch my pet bird and has experimented with trying to interact with him. Of course, nothing came of it.

Day 26: How did you discover dæmonism? Having been in alterhuman communities for over 13 years I have been passively aware of dæmonism for some time. It sounded interesting but was not something I felt fit me at the time. Then I all of a sudden decided to check the practice out, wanted to learn more about it, and decided to give it a shot.

Day 27: Was it difficult to begin communicating with your dæ? Yes and no. At first, when I was still trying to understand the fundamentals of dæmonism, I was spending some time talking to myself/my dæ in the hopes of something clicking. I think I was just talking about the idea of dæmonism and said something like "I am not even sure this will work," and got a 'response' in the back of my mind that said, "I think it's possible." After that it had been kind of easier to communicate with Ayeoh, though most of the time he communicates with images and feelings rather than full sentences. We have been getting better at communicating through actual words, but I know my problem is that I am spending too much time with things filling up my brain space (podcasts, audiobooks, etc.) and not enough time just sitting in silence with my thoughts and focusing on talking to my dæmon.

Day 28: Are there any forms you or your dæ dislike? Not that I know of. We don't particularly like large-sized forms, but for no real reason other than they just feel too big for him.

Day 29: Does your dæ have a human form or a not real creature form? The first form I projected Ayeoh as was a BD droid from Star Wars, and we still consider that one of his main forms. Other than that, no mythical animals or human forms.

Day 30: What is your dæ's favorite place? He usually likes being on my lap or my shoulders (lounged like a cat) if he can get away with it. He likes resting next to my bird's cage or on the windowsill if the window is open. Otherwise his favorite place it just wherever I am.

#daemonism #daemian #30 day daemian challenge #noise

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