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#and I want to change my hair and what I wear and get a new hobby and all that
sunny44 · 2 days
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Stubborn
Paring: Carlos Sainz x Leclerc!reader
Warnings: mentions of surgery, appendix removed, sickness and maybe other things
Summary: Carlos insists on going to the race even after just having surgery.
This story is the second part of Secret Love, but if you haven't read the first part you'll understand this chapter here without any problem. But I would recommend you read it.
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Today was race day and we were getting ready to leave the hospital. Since the surgery went well, they discharged Carlos.
“Honey, I’ve finished packing your things. Can we go to the hotel and…” At that moment, he emerged from the bathroom wearing the Ferrari shirt. “Why are you dressed like that?”
“We’re heading to the Paddock,” he said. I looked at him in disbelief.
“Of course not, are you crazy? You just had surgery and you already want to go back there?”
“Honey, I’m fine.”
“No, you’re not. You have stitches in your stomach and you already want to go there? You’re not even going to race.”
“Babe.”
“No, listen, if you want to go, fine.” I angrily threw the rest of his things into the backpack. “But I’m not going with you.”
“Y/n.”
“No, I went through hell yesterday fearing something might happen to you, only for you to tell me you want to go there to watch the race.” I zipped up the backpack. “I hate this, you and Charles are just the same.”
“What does your brother have to do with this?”
“That you both have this reckless tendency to put your lives at risk for stupid things.” I tried to control myself from crying. “I won’t have another one in my life who makes me go through this.”
Before he could say anything, his father entered the room, and I stormed out, heading back to the hotel.
It’s things like this that makes me angry. I already have two brothers who are always putting themselves in danger and often doing unnecessary things. I never used to be so afraid of these things until Jules’ death. It was a dark moment in our lives, and knowing that he died in a way that my two brothers and now my boyfriend could also die leaves me extremely worried and on the verge of having a panic attack.
So the fact that he wants to go to the paddock to watch the race after surgery makes me furious.
When I got to the hotel, I went straight to take a shower, dried my hair, and put on pajamas since I would be here the rest of the day. I ordered room service and turned on the TV to watch the race, and immediately saw Carlos entering the paddock. He was walking slowly because of the surgery, and I just shook my head and settled back into bed.
Midway through the race, I was packing my bags since I would be catching a flight to Monaco early tomorrow morning when the door suddenly opened scaring me and Carlos walked into the room.
“Hey,” he said, closing the door.
“Hey.” I finished packing my suitcase and placed it on the floor.
“Leaving?”
“We have a flight to Monaco tomorrow morning, so…”
“Are you staying at my place or…”
“I’m staying at my mom’s.”
“I thought you were staying with me.”
“That was before this morning.”
“Y/n…”
“I’m not trying to control you or tell you what to do, but you were extremely irresponsible with your health today by going to the race, which could harm your recovery.”
“I know.”
“And yet you went.”
“But I’m here, I came back because I knew you were right and…” He stopped because he winced in pain.
“Lie down.” I took his hand and helped him onto the bed, lifting his shirt. “Did you changed this today?”
“Not yet.” I sighed and got the things I had bought earlier in the morning, starting to clean the wound. “Ouch.”
“Sorry,” I said, finishing cleaning and applying a new dressing. “Here are your medications, they might make you a bit drowsy, so you’ll probably fall asleep.”
“I’m really sorry,” he said again. “Charles didn’t explain the reason, but he told me this upsets you.”
“Yeah, it does.”
“Do you want to tell me why?” He opened his arms, and I lay down on his chest.
“It’s because Jules died doing what you and my brothers do.” He hugged me tighter. “And I remember vividly the pain I felt when they buried him, leaving only memories and grief.”
“I’m sorry you feel that way and that I contribute to what scares you.”
“I don’t mind your job; I like seeing you do what you love and achieving your dreams. But I can’t help feeling scared every time you, Charles, or Arthur get into those cars.” I sighed and started tracing circles with my fingers on his chest. “It’s just that I don’t know if I could handle it if something happened to any of you. It’s not about the surgery; I just want to prevent anything from happening to you guys over something as trivial as going to watch the race in person after having your appendix removed.”
“I’m sorry for not realizing that and for ignoring your advice to rest.”
“It’s okay, I should have been honest about what was scaring me.”
“Are we okay?” he asked.
“We are.” He smiled and kissed my forehead. “But from now on, if you do something like this again, you’ll have to work a lot harder for my forgiveness. I’m just being nice now because you’re recovering.”
“Okay, that’s fair enough for me.” We switched positions, and he lay on my chest. “I love you.”
“I love you too.”
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Bonus scene!
Carlossainz instagram stories
“Thank you all for the love messages you’ve been sending to me, it has certainly helped me a lot. I'm still recovering but with the help of all my team and my wonderful girlfriend I'm getting better every day." Tagged: Y/nleclerc
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slushycoookie · 3 days
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Roleplay Date ~ Miguel O'Hara x AFAB! Reader
Content: You and Miguel do some roleplay, mostly fluff, starts to get suggestive occasionally and near the end, MINORS DNI!!
A/N: Wanted to do a quick idea of you doing a role-play date with Miguel! Enjoy!
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He should be here any minute now.
The time on your phone was your favorite thing to look at when you stepped into the bar. You tried to relax with a sip of your margarita, the slightly sour taste of apple dancing across your palate, but your mind kept wandering. How was this going to go? Would it be awkward? Or would it fail if someone tried to steal your man? You had a few other people try to talk to you while you sat but to your relief, disappeared when they saw you weren't that interested.
You had no reason to be nervous. Couples go on role-play dates all the time. You read their ideas and their experiences. It should be fun.
Thirty minutes passed and you saw your husband.
You caught your breath at his change of appearance. A green cardigan, with the top button undone. His white pants contrasted in color but somehow worked well with his black suede loafers. Miguel looked good. You always knew he could be, but this was a little different. You tried not to gawk as you sipped your drink again, pretending the menu was more interesting than anyone else. He wasn't too far from your seat but you caught a whiff of his cologne, earthy with sharp hints of mint. It's one you've never smelled before.
Miguel ordered a rum and coke as you tried to decide what to eat. Maybe some sliders? Or there was a sampling platter you could try. But you also saw sushi on the menu.
“Hi.”
You perked up, heart banging in your chest as you turned to him. He was even better up close. And…did he change his hair? It was parted to the side, not slicked back like his usual style. Miguel usually changes his hair on special occasions. You tried to hold back admiring his brown curls shining in the dim light as you remembered he spoke to you.
“Hi.” A light smile appeared on your face.
“Do you come here often?”
You bit your lip, wondering if you two should have developed a script. But you wanted the interaction to be natural since it's the first time roleplaying like this. “No, I don’t. This is my first time.”
“Alone?” Miguel raised an eyebrow as you nodded, “Someone like you shouldn’t be alone on a night like this.”
Curious, you played with your straw by swirling it in your drink, “What's someone like me?”
“Gorgeous.”
He was eyeing your outfit. A simple black dress that gave much attention to your cleavage. Paired with small matching black heels. You weren't the type to wear this sort of thing but you wanted to try something new. And give your husband something to stare at.
Your poker face was impenetrable, despite wanting to forget everything and immediately go into the hotel room. “You're gonna have to do better than that.”
Miguel smirked before signaling to the bartender that he would pay for anything you wanted for the rest of the night. She gave you a look to make sure you agreed and you nodded. He motioned to the seat beside you and you invited him to stay.
“I’m Miguel.” You gave him yours and he said it as if he’s never said it before. A tingle shot through your spine. “May I ask why you decided to go to the bar tonight?”
“I wanted a drink.” You shrugged, “And I heard this hotel was nice.”
“It is.” He took a sip of his drink, eyes never far from yours.
“Oh? You’ve been here before?”
“Many times. I’ve always been satisfied with the service when I go here on business.”
You hum in delight, “So you’re a businessman?”
“Not quite.” He gives a soft chuckle, “I’m a scientist, that unfortunately has to go on business trips.”
You knew that part about him. He always hated going on trips because that meant he’d be away from you. “What do you specialize in?”
“Genetics.” You had to hold back in smiling hard, seeing his eyes light up at any mention of his work. The conversation was interrupted momentarily when the bartender asked what you wanted to eat. You and Miguel decided to share a sushi platter with an assortment of flavors each of you could try.
And your margarita was also gone, so you decided to get a daiquiri, wanting something a little bit sweeter to combat the sourness you had.
“So you’re a geneticist?” You asked, picking the conversation back up, “That’s fascinating. I’ve never met any geneticists. Especially ones as good-looking as you. Must be in your genes.”
A flash of your husband came out as Miguel’s eyes lowered at your terrible joke. Even you snorted at your words. “Funny. So I’m guessing your profession is a comedian.”
“No way.” You shook your head, “Not by a long shot.”
“Thank god.”
You gasped, pretending to be insulted while watching him hold back a laugh behind his straw. “Rude.”
“I’m just saying. I wouldn’t have high hopes in your career after that joke.”
The air was light and comfortable. Any semblance of nervousness you had previously faded away. That could've just been the alcohol though.
“So since you specialize in genetics, you know all the good stuff. Punnett squares, why people with blue eyes are rare, that sort of thing.”
Miguel nodded, “Usually we're able to find all of your genetic markings through your blood.”
“I'm not scared of getting my blood drawn.” You confidently say, “You think you'd find anything good in my genes?”
He hums in thought, moving closer to slide his hand up your bare forearm, placing his thumb between your arm and bicep. His touch was warm, almost burning your skin up. “Maybe. As long as you hold still.”
“Only if you're gentle.” You let out a low sigh. Your husband staring directly into your eyes, rubbing his thumb against your skin. You're so close to fast-forwarding this date and getting in his pants.
It was to your luck that the food came, causing you and him to part so you could dine in. Husband mode came back as he handed you the wasabi. Your lips curled, knowing he wasn't the biggest fan of it when he accidentally put a huge smear on his roll, eating it whole. You pictured his eyes tearing up and his face scrunching up was hilarious.
“You don't like wasabi?”
Miguel’s head shook with disdain, “Not a fan. It's too hot for my tastes.”
“That's because you put too much on there when you shouldn’t have-” You immediately shut your lips, trying to fix your words. “I mean, plenty of people put a lot on there. It’s a common mistake.”
He ignored your slip up, “Then can you show me how much is adequate for me?”
“Of course.” You took a little piece using your chopsticks, placing it on his sushi roll as if it were delicate. You watched as he ate the piece, shoulders lowered in satisfaction. “See, not that hot right?”
“Not at all.” He then asked about your job which you proceeded to describe as boring. Not as exciting as his geneticist one. While you did so, Miguel kept showing his husband side, making sure you had your fill. As he listened intently. The stranger façade started to fade as you two were starting to act like a married couple again. You’re sure anyone from a mile away could see it.
But you didn’t care. You were full, mind a little clouded from the alcohol and the night was winding down. The time on your phone was almost eleven at night.
Miguel slipped his black card to the bartender, paying for the meal and drinks. You gazed at his form, not believing that you were married to this man.
“Do you have a ride home?” He asked. You knew he made arrangements to book a room at the hotel, but knowing him he’d wanted to make sure the date ended on a satisfying note.
“I’m looking at it.”
His eyes went wide at the flirtatious line for a moment. “Bold, are we?”
“Maybe.” Your playful smirk drew him closer as he leaned into your ear.
“You can ride me in our room.”
You two sped walk towards the elevator. Miguel’s finger repeatedly pressed the down button to make it go faster. Your body was hot, breathing speeding up as you couldn’t hold on much longer. You never knew how slow elevators were when its doors creaked open. The two of you rushed inside and once it was closed, were immediately on each other.
Hot breaths, messy kisses, and hands groping every single part of your bodies filled the space. The cold steel wall was felt on your back as Miguel trapped you, his hard body pressed against your own. He hiked up your leg to wrap around his waist while sucking on your neck. Creating a few marks on your skin.
The dings from the elevator going up were the only thing keeping you together. Otherwise, you were sure he was going to fuck you inside.
“Wait.” Miguel parted, his face stained from your lipstick, hair messy from the exchange. “Do you have your ring?”
You nodded, getting it from your purse. Before you could put it on, he did it for you, slipping it through your ring finger where it belonged. He grabbed his own from his pocket, before slipping it on.
“That’s better.”
Just in time, the elevator stopped on your floor. Miguel picked you up with ease and dashed to the room to continue where you left off.
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jaegerrb0mb · 2 days
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Miss all American </3
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Note: this is part two of my hot garbage fic
even if it hurts <3 and this one is just as bad and I also didn’t read over it as well.. 😐
Summary: Visiting her favorite cafe in japan reader runs into her ex bf
Warnings: jokes of being engaged, talks of marriage/having a baby, my horrible grammar, and somewhat fluff?
Pairing: ProHero! katsuki bakugou x ProHero! Fem Reader
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"Hello, H/N, what can I get for you?" The cashier asks with an admiring expression, yet he is trying to play it cool that a top-ranking hero from the US is standing right in front of him. "Can I get a (your coffee or tea order) and one of those pumpkin muffins, please?" You point at the little dessert window and give the cashier a bright smile. "Yes, of course, Miss H/N," he says, moving quickly to make your order.
It’s been awhile since you were in Japan; in fact, you haven’t been here since graduation. You moved to the US quickly after finishing school when you heard there were more villains and not a lot of heroes out there, and you wanted to help in the most possible way, so you went abroad. You're out here visiting; it’s the first time you’ve been back to Japan in 5 years. You’ve been considering moving back, seeing as much as you missed it. Especially the cafe you’re in right now,
Taking a look around, it hasn’t changed one bit and still looks like it did when you were a teenager. Memories quickly flood your mind.
and you can’t help the bittersweet pain of nostalgia that burns through your chest.
"Here ya go!" The cashier hands you your order with a huge grin that pulls you out of your short thoughts. "Oh, thank you. How much will this be?" tilting your head to the side when he gives you a funny look. "Didn’t you hear me earlier? I said it was on the house." He laughs a bit at your confused expression. "Erm.. why?"
He leans over the counter a bit. "My family is from America; my mom told me a story about how you saved her life, so take it as my way of saying thank you." You smile softly at his words when he finishes. 'That explains why he recognizes me; I didn’t think anyone in Japan knew of me.
 
"Well, t-
 
"Heeey dynamight! Would you like your usual?" The cashier completely ignores you, focusing his attention fully on the male behind you. 'Dyna, wait, katsuki?' Quickly turning on your heels to face the man, it is in fact him and even more handsome than you remembered from your high school days. He’s wearing his hero uniform without the gauntlets, but it definitely has a lot of new upgrades. He's got a few scars on his arms and neck, some look old and some look more fresh; his hair is no longer the uneven choppy locks you used to love running your hands through; it's now an undercut, but the spikes still remain at the top; he always had a large, broad, and strong body, but now he looks more toned; his muscles are more defined, making him look in better shape than ever; he's a lot taller; and his eyes don’t hold as much hostility as before. He looks mature now. And a lot hotter if that were even possible.
"what’s the matter? never saw the No. 2 up close?" He taunts at you, but he gets no response except your dumbfounded expression. He steps a bit closer taking you in, his own eyes widen before turning to a more softer gaze, "l/n? Ain’t you some american hero now?" his voice is smooth as honey and It takes a second for you to gather your stunned self to try forming words "I am, I’m just visiting." he hums in response. "If you have time, I’d love to chat and catch up with you, Mr. No. 2," you joked before grabbing your stuff and making your way to a nearby table to sit so that you don’t hold up a line by the front.
Sipping from your drink and scrolling through social media on your phone, not really paying attention as you keep glancing up watching katsuki pay for his order until he finally makes his way over to you, now sitting across from you.
"So, what’s it like in America?" He asked, taking a sip of his own coffee and leaning over the table a bit. "It’s nice; I like it a lot, but I was actually thinking about- 
"Do you have a boyfriend?" He catches you off guard almost making you slice your finger as you were about to cut your pumpkin muffin. "Oh, straight to the point huh?" you laugh to play it cool, but your heart has been hammering in your chest since you laid eyes on him. "Just answ-
"no, I don’t.. I haven’t dated anyone cause I’ve been focusing on my hero work and it’s quite hard to find the time for it, you know? How bout you?" Sliding half of a muffin over to him. and taking a bite out of your half. something you always did as teenagers when the two of you came to this cafe in the middle of fall was split a pumpkin muffin. they were always out of them and you could never get your hands on them. and since you got the last one you decided to offer him half. it wasn’t anything special but you hoped it sparked the same nostalgia you’ve been feeling all day onto him. and you know it did when you catch the corners of his mouth quirk up into a small smile.
"I’m engaged."
His sentence throws you into a coughing fit as you look up to see him untuck a chain under his hero uniform from around his neck that holds a sliver ring, but he’s quick to tuck it back before you can even examine it.
he leans back crossing his arms over his chest with a smirk as he watches your coughing die down.  
"Oh, I-wow, congratulations, bakugou." Your smile is forced as you blink back tears from coughing and from pain before leaning down to take another sip of your drink, and he can tell your smile was fake as he begins to laugh. "No need to get jealous now; I’m messing with you." He untucks it again to show it to you.
It’s the promise ring you gave to him when you were 16.
You feel relieved, but your eyes still widen. "You kept it all this time? Why do you still wear it?" You quirk an eyebrow while watching as he takes a bite of his muffin and wait for him to answer.
"I guess to mess around with idiots like you." He finishes his coffee before he continues. "Well, to be honest, I never really could’ve found the heart to throw it, and it’s the only thing I've had from you since you left. Why didn’t you tell me you were leaving? You didn’t tell anyone, and you never called either. I had to find out from damn endeavor out of all people." He toys with the ring around his neck as you frown. "I couldn’t find the heart to say goodbye to you or our classmates. I felt like a jerk, but I knew it was for the better, at least at the time. I don’t know, Kats-Bakugou."
"You don’t have to correct yourself; you can call me by my first name, Miss American." He jokes, trying to make the conversation lighthearted while tucking the ring back once again. "What is your rank there anyway?"
"I’m the No. 2 hero, like you." You stick your tongue out at him before finishing the remains of your muffin. "Wow, with a brain like yours, I figured you’d be at least in the 50s," he smirked, making you lean over the table and hit him lightly. "You’re so mean, Katsuki," you pout playfully. "It’s called honesty, y/n." He laughs when you roll your eyes and slouch back in your chair. "You know you’re lucky you’re handsome, or I’d really be offended right now." You sip your drink. "Oh really? You think I’m handsome?" He rests his arms on the table, leaning forward. you smirk, coping his actions. "Yeah, but it’s too bad you’re engaged." You throw his joke back at him.
"Haha, so funny."
"You’re the one that said it, not me."
"Forget about that. Wanna come back to my place?"
"You shouldn’t cheat on your fiancé."
You smile playfully as he shakes his head, leaning in a bit more.
"The only woman I’d ever be engaged to is sitting right in front of me, but it’s too bad she decided to leave the day after graduation. not even caring to give me a phone call." he playfully clicks his tongue. "Yeah, but the phone works both ways," you shrug.
"doesn’t change the fact that you ruined my plan to take you back after school." He leans back in his chair, now crossing his arms once again. you scoffed. "That’s bullshit, and we both know that."
"Me asking you to be my wife was bullshit? I had the whole thing planned for how I was going to propose, and if you didn’t go Miss all American on me, I bet we’d be married with a baby on the way. That is what you wanted when we were together, right? to have a family young?" He makes a "tch" noise, tilting his head up at the ceiling, causing you to frown. "You shouldn’t joke about that, Katsuki."
He quickly turns his attention back to you.
"I never said I was." His words are followed by silence besides the other people around chatting, but still enough to leave thick tension in the air.
"Katsuki, I-
He suddenly reaches for your drink, taking a sip from it and taking you by surprise. "Hey! I never said you could-
"And it’s still not too late for that." his voice holding a deeper rasp as he clears his throat. "Listen, y/n, I’m going to be straight forward with you because there’s no reason for me to lie. I always loved you, and I never stopped loving you. I don’t care if you live in fuckin’ Guam, Canada, or wherever; I know I can make long-distance work for however long you want it to work. Remember back then when I said I’d take you back in a heartbeat? I still stand by that. So if you still want that future you planned with me, try giving me a call; it’s the same damn number I’ve always had." He places your drink down and gets up to leave, but you catch him by his wrist. "Didn’t you ask if I wanted to go back to your place?" giving him doe eyes while your fingers danced their way up his muscles. He leans down so he’s face-to-face with you. "Gotta finish patrol; don’t worry, babe; promise, as soon as I’m off the clock, I’ll take you there." He gives you a smug smile, turning back around to leave. You call out to him once more before he makes it through the door.
"Katsuki!" He stills but doesn’t turn. "I’m here for two weeks."
"Better be ready; I’ll make it worth your while."
With that, he went.
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Tags: @sofilsword @the-dumpster-fire-of-life
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girlokwhatever · 10 hours
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✩ ₊˚.🎧⋆☾⋆✧₊ ⊹ nice surprise,, pt.2
paige bueckers x fem!reader
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that night after the live had to be one of the best nights of your life.
she wasn’t lying about coming over, less than twenty minutes had passed before she was knocking on your door. you quickly opened it, shocked she was there but even more shocked by the fact that this was all real.
“hey, it’s nice to meet you.” she smiled down at you so sweetly, tucking her loose hair behind her ear and leaning against your doorway. you noticed she changed out of her pajamas, opting for grey sweatpants instead and a different sweater.
“it’s nice to meet you too, you can um- you can come in.. let me just-“ you’re kicking your roommate’s shoes against the wall so she doesn’t trip on them, slightly distressed because is the dorm always this messy?
once you’re done you let her in, closing the door gently behind her. she’s immediately hit with a scent so different from what she’s used to, but she really likes it. she looks at you and decides that it matches your energy. that’s another thing; being in your space, your home, makes her feel like she knows you on some personal level. like in a way she’s meant to be here.
“m’sorry if it’s messy, sunday’s are cleaning days i swear.”
“no it’s alright, it’s nice. really cozy. i like it.”
deep down you’re sighing in relief, but deep down you’re also deathly nervous. you’ve never met someone like this, what do you even do?
“can i get a water?”
she sees your eyes shoot wide, scurrying into the kitchen in search of a water bottle. you can’t see her but she’s got a stupidly smug grin on her face, amused by how jittery you are. she wants to reach out and grab your hand, maybe pull you closer to her, but she remembers she only met you a few hours ago.
“here y’go!” you’re smiling with pride, pushing the glass of water (topped with ice) in her direction. she thinks you’re the most beautiful person she’s ever got the pleasure of looking at before, completely aware of the effect you have on her. you on the other hand, are completely oblivious.
all of the sudden, paige has the thought that she doesn’t really care how long she’s known you for. what does matter is that she knows she wants to hold you, at least be a little closer. so she’s wrapping her fingers around yours and tugging you towards her.
butterflies aren’t just fluttering in your stomach, you think they’re eating you alive. her hand is warm and isn’t far away from engulfing yours, but you like this intimacy. it’s soft and sweet and pure, both just enjoying the new company.
“wanna take you out somewhere, is that ok?” her hands barely found their way under your sweater, thumbs circling your bare hips. her eye contact is persistent but she’s really just looking for any hesitation from you; she doesn’t want you to be uncomfortable at all.
you’re glancing back at the clock: 11:33 p.m. you decide in that moment you’d let her take you anywhere, whenever she wanted. she’s got you wrapped around her finger, completely at her mercy. somehow knowing this doesn’t bother you, not even a little bit.
“yeah, s’okay.” your tone lets her know it’s more than okay, but that’s an unspoken understanding between the two of you.
paige is looking at you, the reality of your outfit setting in. she feels a tinge of jealousy course through her at the thought of you being a caitlin clark fan, wearing iowa’s team logo instead of hers.
“gotta take this off though, it’d ruin my reputation.” she’s got a hold on the sweater, tugging on it as you walk towards what she assumes is your room.
she was right, walking into your space. bed messily made, soft lights adorning your bedside table, an unorganized desk.. she thinks it’s fitting for you. just from what she’s experienced from you so far, she feels like she’s got a good read on you.
“i thought iowa was cool” you’re using air quotes and throwing her words back at her. you’re funny, you really are, already knowing how to push her buttons.
“yeah? but nothing beats uconn.”
you’re laughing and, was that a snort? she’s not entirely sure, but it doesn’t really matter when you’re head is thrown back and you’re looking at her like that. she jokingly takes offense, helping you lift the sweater away from your body and throwing it into some deep crevice of your room. paige is aware of the fact that she has to turn away from you, cause if she doesn’t, she’s more than positive she’ll get on her knees in front of you and beg for anything you’ll give to her.
“is this our first date?”
“i’d like to think so.”
once you’ve changed into something you both agreed to (that doesn’t have anything to do with iowa), she’s urging you out the door and to her car. as she starts to drive, she decides to take this time just to talk. she wants to at least know your favorite color considering she’s already seen you in your bra. from your instagram she knows you’re a grade under her, studying in your junior year.
you both end up finding out things about each other you didn’t know before. simple, basic things, but things nonetheless.
you have more in common than you thought. you both have little brothers, from the same hometown, you like some of the same music, you both like sports and the spring time, the little things. the way she describes her younger brother reminds you of your own, and for a second you hope they can meet each other. that hopefully this could go somewhere serious. maybe it’ll really mean something.
“ok, before you say anything, this is my favorite café and i know it’s late but they’re open all night. i can buy you a coffee or something-“
she’s nervous, she’s never taken a date here. she’s never really taken a girl anywhere in awhile. she’s glad it’s you though and not someone else.
“it’s really cute! i really like it paige.” your hand finds itself on her bicep, squeezing slightly. she feels more confident under your touch, like it recharges her. when you pull away to leave the car, she finds herself wanting to chase your touch, desperate to feel it again.
she gives into the feeling, grabbing your hand as the two of you walk inside. she scolds herself for moving too fast and clinging too much, but you’re holding her hand tight to keep her there. you don’t know why you’re so drawn to her, but you are. definitely. everything feels so natural with her, like you don’t have to try hard to impress her.
you both order and despite your protest, she pays for your drink and slice of cake. she’s insisting that you’re gonna share with her anyway so it doesn’t matter.
“so.. that was your roommate on the live with you earlier?”
“yeah, her name is evie. we’ve roomed together since freshman year. why?”
“jus askin. figured i should write her a ‘thank you’ card for being the reason we met.”
you think that’s a remark you’d usually laugh at, but when paige says it, it sounds so genuine. the only response you can muster is a smile. you’re also irrevocably thankful for evie and her spontaneity because you know without it you would still be in your dorm, either sleeping or watching some stupid movie.
“don’t say stuff like that paige”
“why not?”
before you’re forced to answer her and possibly embarrass yourself, a waiter is brining your drinks and cake. you take a bite and make a comment about how good it is and ‘paige you should try it’ to change the topic. it doesn’t work on her though, she’s still questioning you. all you do is shake your head, nervously sipping your coffee and avoiding it.
“why can’t i say that?”
“because you’re too sweet. if you say stuff like that i’m absolutely one hundred percent positive i’ll fall in love with you.”
“would that be so bad?”
“you tell me.”
looking back on it, paige doesn’t think she could’ve pulled you in any faster. she’s kissing you with desperation, seeking your warmth in the cold winter air. her hands cup your face gently, holding you like her life depends on it. you kiss her back, giving into your feelings despite all the apprehension. your mouth move together in sync, finding your own unique rhythm to follow. after you falter for a second she pulls away, fearing that maybe you didn’t want that.
you look at her for a second and catch your breath. it’s your turn to cup her face this time, her hands traveling down to your hips. you pull her back in for a gentle and sweet lasting kiss, savoring the way her lips move against yours and the way she tastes.
she’s pulling away again, moving you to her car and really looking at you.
“that was a nice surprise,”
“paige?”
“yeah?” she’s holding your hand to her face, leaning into you.
“this isn’t the last date right?”
“i’m never leaving you alone after tonight ma, take that as you will.”
₊˚ʚ ᗢ₊˚✧ ゚.ִ ࣪𖤐˚. ✦.˳·˖✶ ⋆.✧̣̇˚.
guys i might redo this tomorrow idk how i feel
be honest!! is it bad or mid or fire 🤑
really though be honest kk thanks!!!!!
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discotitsposts · 10 hours
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i do
spencer reid x fem reader
spencer asks you to marry him and you get married in a quick ceremony (set in like season 11 in my mind)
a little short but silly and fun and i love happy spencer he deserves it
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his ass looks so juicy here
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Spencer had been nervously shaking all morning. You were really worried about him. Why is he acting so strangely? You wondered while drinking your own coffee.
“Spence, anything the matter love?” You ask softly as you set his mug of coffee down on the table in front of him.
He just lifts his head and reaches into his pocket nervously. He slowly gets down on one knee in front of you. You realize where this is going and gasp. He pulls out a small black velvet box in the shape of a heart.
When he opens it carefully, there sits your dream ring. It’s absolutely beautiful.
“Will you marry me?” Spencer asked tears flowing from his eyes.
“Yes! Of course I will Spencer!” You jump excitedly.
“I know a pastor that can marry us in an hour if you’d like.”
“But I don’t wanna marry a pastor, I wanna marry you!” You pout.
“What? No that’s not what-,” Spencer starts confused.
“I’m kidding! Of course I want to marry you now!! Let’s go!!” You race to grab your phone and call the closest thing Spencer’s got to a real family. The BAU team.
The team was going to meet you down at the church. You had just snagged a wedding dress quickly from a bridal shop. It was beautiful and exactly what you wanted. You were now in an antique shop.
“Ok so your necklace is the something old, your dress is the something new. All that’s left is something blue and a penny in your shoe.”
You lift your heel so he can slip the penny in your shoe.
“What can we find that’s blue?” You keep looking and find nice cufflinks for Spencer to wear. He was currently looking at vintage suits.
“What do you think?” He holds up a dark blue suit.
“Honey I don’t think you can be my something blue.”
“I just happen like the color though.” He pouts.
“Then it looks very nice. Hey what about this?” You hold up a beautiful antique tiara littered with blue jewels.
“Beautiful. Let’s get it.” You both race to the church and change. The girls help you with your hair and makeup.
Spencer goes ahead to meet the pastor at the altar while you wait at the end of the aisle. The BAU team and a few of your friends are waiting there cheering you both on. The organist plays the wedding march and Rossi takes your arm and walks you down the aisle.
JJ’s son follows as the ring bearer.
You’re crying, Spencer’s crying, Rossi’s crying, everyone’s crying. Even Morgan.
You thank Rossi and step up. Emily, JJ, Tara, and some of your friends are bridesmaids and Penelope, being your maid of honor, lifts your dress’s train and adjusts it. Spencer’s best man is Morgan. Hotch and Will are up there with him.
Spencer takes your hand and you speak your quickly written vows. Then the pastor.
“Do you Dr. Spencer Reid, take this woman to be your lawfully wedded wife?”
“I do.” Tears are streaming down his face.
“(y/n) do you take this man to be your lawfully wedded husband?”
“I do.” You’re smiling at him and squeezing his hands.
“You may now kiss the bride.” The pastor smiles proudly.
Spencer kisses you passionately. Then you throw your bouquet to the bridesmaids, Penelope catches it excitedly. Emily doesn’t even try to catch it.
Hotch throws some rice at you guys while laughing. JJ and Will are also throwing some.
Morgan shouts after you guys as you try to escape, “They’re excited to get started on the honeymoon!!”
After you guys leave he turns to Penelope, “Can’t believe the kid finally got hitched!”
That’s just what you guys did, hopped on a flight to anywhere you’ve always dreamed of going, got the biggest honeymoon suite the hotels offered, and enjoyed yourselves.
They lived happily ever after!
The End💘
————
i hope this was even a little bit fun to read, please let me know if you enjoyed.
______
tags-
@whoisspence
@lemonadeinfuser
@fictionalobssed
@exoticisles
@in-another-april
@gallifreyan-idiocracy
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castorcasting · 2 days
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Dick Grayson x F!Reader
Note: I just started writing..I didn't actually have a full proof idea on what this story is about. :D
It was late at night, probably around 3am.  You kept tossing and turning around in your bed, hoping to find that perfect sleeping posture.  However it never happened, you laid there looking up, staring at the ceiling. Trying to count sheep, hoping that you'll tire yourself out eventually. You've never been able to sleep well nowadays, especially with your new job that bothered you so much..Plus you miss Dick Grayson, he was out on a late mission with Batman.
Suddenly you heard a loud thud coming from the living room, you quickly sprang out of your bed. cautiously taking the baseball bat that was beside the nightstand, a little gift from Dick. You opened the door carefully and walked into the living room quietly, you squinted your eyes, trying to find anything or anyone in the dark living room. As you scanned the area,  a pair of hands touched your shoulders. You screamed and swung the bat, you heard a shout come from the person. You didn't care, you kept swinging your bat. Not knowing who was on the receiving end of it.
Just as you continued to wave the bat around, you were suddenly pinned onto the wall. "Let me go!" You opened my eyes, you didn't even realise you closed it in the first place. You looked and saw Dick, in his Nightwing suit. You widened your eyes in horror and dropped the bat.
"Dick..? Oh I'm so sorry!" He let go of you and just took off his cowl. You got the bat off the floor while he turned on the living room lights.
"Did I hurt you? Are you okay?" You rambled on but stopped when he placed a hand on your mouth, giving you a smile.
"I'm okay, I'm fine. Glad you actually used the bat." He smiled proudly at you, you looked at him incredulously. "Dick. I almost bashed your brains out." You worriedly held him, checking for injuries. "It's fine, I'm a vigilante. You know, good reflexes." He just smirked and hopped on the couch, laying on it with a relieved sigh. Finally able to rest his sore muscles.
"Just glad you actually used it to protect yourself, by the way..why are you still up? It's kinda late." He asked, he sat up while looking at you, observing you. From where you stood, you shifted nervously, "I can't sleep. You know.."
Dick frowned at you and signalled for you to come over to him, you listened without hesitation and sat on the couch beside him. "Sorry babe. Should've been here." He apologised and you shook your head. "No I understand..Gotham needs you." You yawned, leaning your head on his chest. His fingers run through your hair softly.
"I know but, you need me too.." He whispered softly, his gentle voice was sleep inducing. You hummed in disagreement. Dick frowned at this, he constantly worries about your sleep and just about everything to do with your well being. The curse of the older sibling syndrome. He held your shoulders and lifted you to sit up straight and face him.
"Babe..how can I be fighting crime outside when I have to constantly worry about your well being..you're too hard on yourself at times and it worries me." He says. Referring to how you work and never rest. You groaned, not really wanting to admit that he's right. "It's fine. I'm used to it." He lets out a frustrated sigh.
"It's not! I know it sounds hypocritical when it comes out of me, but please..take care of yourself more." He peppered you with kisses, hoping it'll convince you more. He stared lovingly at you, his blue eyes pleaded and you couldn't say no.
"...Fine, I'll take a week off. Happy?" You asked  while rubbing your eyes, he stopped you by gently holding your wrist. "Of course. I'll get changed so we both can sleep, alright?" Dick gave you that love sick smile and you nodded at him with a tired smile. You watched as he went into your room. You laid on the couch, you felt so tired. Your eyes closed and you hugged the baseball bat to sleep.
Dick came out a few minutes later, wearing a normal black T-shirt and sweatpants. He walked up to the couch and he saw you just sleeping there. Hugging the baseball bat he gave you months ago when you had a B&E incident, he chuckled quietly and gently took the bat away, he carried you bridle style as he walked into your shared room, he laid you down gently, he kissed you on the forehead. Wrapping his hands around you. A way for him to protect you while sleeping. "Goodnight love." He whispered while moving a strand of hair away from your face, admiring your tired face while you slept.
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hariboz · 19 hours
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“forget? you?” — shb x gen!reader
a little something i wrote to get back into my writing flow!
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ex!hanbin has been plaguing my mind for a while now. the type to make the heart wrenching decision to break up with you to follow his dreams in hopes of finding what he wanted in the spotlight, ready to sacrifice the comfort of your embrace to chase what he has been dreaming of for years.
“thank you for always being by my side, but i don’t know if i can be happy if i don’t try one last time. i don’t want to break your heart, angel, but will you let me go?”
and you did. of course you did, how could you not? you could always see the sparkle in his eyes when he showed you a new choreography he made, the longing in his gaze when watching others dance on the same stages he could only dream of being on. you knew he was happy with you, you knew he loved you. he was happy, loved and comfortable, yet unfulfilled. because while you would give him every single star in the night sky if you could, no amount of your love would sustain his desire to become the shiniest star of them all himself.
so you let him go, gave him your blessing and told him to better make it to the top so your love was not given up in vain.
you had never seen hanbin cry so much before.
“i promise, angel. i’ll carry you with me in my heart.”
and truth be told, ex!hanbin held his promise. he made it. a leader, a highly sought after visual, a mc, a vocalist.
he’s not your binnie anymore. he’s not the one waking up an hour before your alarm to make you breakfast anymore. he’s not picking you up from work with that sweet smile and a smoothie in his hand. he doesn’t try to teach you his choreos anymore. he doesn’t giggle at you while fixing your hair anymore.
on days where it’s especially hard you catch yourself wishing you had refused, had kept him close to you. had begged him to stay back, to not sacrifice all the serene happiness you shared; but then you snap back to reality, the realisation that these selfish thoughts keep crawling their way up making you feel guilty.
it’s a sick twist of fate, you think, when you happen to walk past a wall of support ads for him plastered along your way. you don’t know whether to laugh or cry; whether you should be elated he is receiving an amount of love you could never have given him or whether you should be hurt and bitter that all this meant more to him than you seemingly ever did.
it’s not fair to compare like that, you know that, but it’s not like he’s there to defend himself. he’s never there anymore.
in your inner frenzy, the internal fight between wanting to support the man you still love oh so deeply and the selfish wish to have kept him for yourself, you bump into someone, misty eyes barely focused enough to notice the person in front of you.
you look up briefly to apologise, wanting nothing more than to get away from this overstimulating throwback to your better times, only to realise that the devil — angel — himself is standing right there.
right there, in front of you. sung hanbin. your binnie.
you know it’s him immediately despite the mask he’s wearing. the all too familiar sparkle in his eyes and his pretty lashes that you know all too well blinking back at you in shock, his eyes desperately darting over your face in an attempt to drink in every little change and detail.
you’re just about to speak when he turns at the sound of his name, which is when you finally realise the crowd standing not too far away, observing him like hawks and pointing their phones at him.
right. he’s idol binnie now.
so you bow politely and leave, trying your best to manoeuvre through the crowd. your heart is beating in your ears, your thoughts all jumbled and confused. you haven’t seen him in so long. not in person, anyways, and now you’re running away? what else could you have done?
it’s like you’re on autopilot, not even noticing you’ve made your way back home until you’re stood in front of your apartment. it’s then when you’re about to unlock your door, planning to crawl into bed and never come back out, that your phone vibrates.
first once, then twice.
“i don’t know if you want to talk to me anymore, but i was happy to see you today. even if it was really short.”
“i miss you.”
“you didn’t forget?”
“forget? you?”
“i could never. i love you.”
”did you ever think about dating an idol?”
ex!hanbin who, i think, would give it all up to follow his dream only to realise every single version of his future had you in it. and now he’s here, trying to win you back, hoping it’s not too late. because ex!hanbin is not only a romantic, but also in love. deeply, unabashedly in love.
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jupitermoontarot24 · 15 hours
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👑How Should You Customize Your Avatar Next?👑💅
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Welcome back guys! Got this idea from a couple readers on here so thanks to them!
Personal readings are in my shop if interested!
ENJOY as always 💋
Pile 1
welcome.
pile one I feel like you should start wearing stuff that shows off your torso more. you should get low rise jeans and pants also clothes that are flowy. you should get a tan or at least a bronze. some type of glow to your skin. you should start wearing hoop earrings big hoops small hoops, bracelets stack them also wear accessories and jewelry in your hair. Emphasis on the waist because the song playing in the background is wasted love lol. I think you should also show off your chest area more. More like your collarbone not cleavage but your actual chest area. I feel like you should grow your hair out if you're wearing it short. if you been think about cutting your hair don't lol you should embrace long hair at least for this pile. You should start working on your summer body. You don't want to be at the beach feeling like a whale because you were in Fairy Tail land. if you want something to change you should work on it so if you want to be summer ready you should work on being ready. I also feel like if your hair is a certain color right now you should probably change it. if you colored your hair during a specific season and it's a different season now you need to change it to match the present. If you do want to color your hair a different color you should go blonde maybe or brown or red for some people or pink. I feel like you should start incorporating dresses more into your wardrobe. You should start wearing dresses a lot more or a skirts. I would also invest into some good pajamas that are cute and nice pajama sets. Also hair accessories like I said headbands scrunchies stuff like that. You should also get some different frames of glasses if you've been thinking about that. Get into reading more it'll bring alot more enjoyment and it'll increase your intelligence and vocabulary so if you think about reading some books I would do that as well. There's something about  having blonde hair that will help you attract more people. You might get a lot more attention being a blonde and for some people you might meet your future spouse while you're blonde.  You have beautiful  boobs pile one. I'm not sure if you've been thinking about changing that but there's nothing wrong with your chest area and spirit wants you to know that. I would also get a new wardrobe. There's something about getting rid of shirts and tops and wearing more dresses, sets and skirts maybe even jumpsuits but I don't see you wearing jeans that much mostly bell bottoms or flowy pants. If you been thinking about getting ombre hair or decorating your apartment to match your aesthetic you should. Script what you want your physical appearance to look like! You have that power
Pile 2 
Welcome
Off the bat pile 2 you should start taking more pictures. You should start having whole photoshoots especially when you're dressed up. have a face of makeup  and your hair is done. You need to take photos because you are not capturing any moments and if someone were to ask to see you or something happened to you they wouldn't have any photos to show. if your bestfriends were yo meet your favorite celebrity, would they have any cute photos of you to show? That's not what you want!  You want to have a “ that's them” photo. You should update your profile picture and you should upload more on your social media. You should try out some new makeup look, more bold looks. Eyeshadows and lipsticks. if you were thinking about coloring your natural hair you should but still keep it natural. I see like a Balayage, ombre, highlights or going one shade lighter. I would also start wearing necklaces more or wear necklace that you can wear every single day. You need to start acting like you are somebody. Its like all your beauty goes to waste because you don't take pictures and you don't experiment too much with your looks as much as you can.. If you were trying to work on your body and lose weight you should start dancing! Zumba or even just dancing in your room with earphones to burn calories as well. You should also get a tattoo or another. Put some art on your body. It seems like you have long hair and I think it's fitting for you but I do think some type of color could be nice as well. I'll also start incorporating solids in your wardrobe. if you don't have any Basic Black white or gray tops you should get some. You don't want every shirt you have to have a Graphic or a print on it just in case you have to dress more upscale or something. Especially if you wear younger hairstyles like buns or pigtails ponytail stuff like that you want to balance that off by wearing a more mature outfit that day. You don't like a teenager if you're not lol. I would start trying to mature my wardrobe if I were you. Start cleaning out your old wardrobe for stuff that you don't want anymore. Also clip off your dead ends of your hair it'll make your hair grow faster. I would also invest in your skincare not just your face but your whole body. I would also invest in nice pajamas if I were you. Stuff thats comfortable but also cute or sexy. You could be drawn pile one. 
Enchanting & Gucci Mane - Issa Photoshoot [Official Music Video]
Pile 3 
Welcome
If you have you been thinking about upgrading your phone you should(new phone or update software). I would invest in good lip products, more lip glosses, balms and stuff like. I would also cut some of the ends off of your hair, clip your dead ends. You should get your nails done pile three, get your nails professionally done you deserve it! and get them long if you like that. It’ll make your hands look better and it'll make your presence more put together. You could be drawn  pile two. You could be drawn to all of the piles. I would say also get another tattoo or one in general. if you've been thinking about a certain ideas you want get them. I think if you have tattoos now they're really nicely placed and they look good so as you continue to build them they will look really good together. I think you have that down pack. I would invest in more hats and scarves (spring scarves, summer scarves, bucket hats). I think you should start dressing out the box .Let your inner child pick the outfits out some days and wear stuff that maybe shouldn't go together but it does. Like how bratz used to wear skirts over leggings or stuff like that. The belt over the dress lol. also don't put yourself in a box when it comes to your wardrobe because I see you dressing differently every single day because your style changes on the day. I would also say let people pick out your outfit sometimes or certain pieces for you. if you go shopping with one of your friends or your partner and they say” do you like this? you think it's cute? or I think this will look good with you!”  Take their advice because I think you might end up looking really good. If you've been thinking about getting your nipples pierced you should. if you've been thinking about getting into voice lessons or singing or voice acting you should. I think this is something you really dream of doing and it's a dream for a reason you should act on it. People might pay more attention to you than you think they do in this pile. You look cute though overall. 
Pile 4
Welcome
Pile four if you have been thinking about getting a tattoo you should definitely get it. I think tha'ts come out in every pile lol. You could be drawn to more than one. if you've been thinking about getting something tatted down your spine or any placement on your back or stomach you should go ahead and do it. if you are looking for ideas for a tattoo you should do something that has a symbolization to yourself. That could be something that represents your name meaning or your culture, ancestry, past life whatever. You should start adding more dark clothing to your wardrobe. Pieces of black clothing, different designs of black clothing. I see you gaining more weight in the right areas to where you can look more full in a feminine way or take it how it resonates. Fat booty? Anime thighs? If you have you been thinking about getting a pet you should get that as well. Your pet could end up being a soul animal or you should get a tattoo of an animal that represents you. I think funky hair colors look really good on you so if you ever colored your hair blue or pops of color you should go back to that. I think Spirit really likes that on you and it fits your personality. Try blue, red or blonde. I think you should also step up your shoe game, get some more sneakers or sandals or whatever to rock with your outfits. If you haven't been going to the gym you should start. I think you should also get into yoga or something that will help in easing the mind and body. You should wear crystals, get crystal necklaces or bracelets or something or  hold them in your pocket. If you're trying to lose weight you should drink green tea or some type of tea. If you're trying to gain weight you should take protein before you work out. You should definitely get your hair a crazy color again, don't go back to black or brown. You should also decorate your room to make it more spring and lighter. I would also experiment with hair extensions as well as add-ons to braids making your braids super long or clip-ins.
CHECK OUT MY PAST READINGS
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UNTILL NEXT TIME
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XOXOXOXOXO
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vylad243 · 2 days
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Prompt: Vox is an angel who is one of Heaven's messengers. He is technically a human turned angel, like Adam was and like Adam usually wears a mask--(however his mask is just a regular bank robber's mask with slots where one Blue and one green eye peer out, and it covers his soft black hair.) He is also one of the few angels Lucifer genuinely likes and can come and go from Hell any time he pleases, and One Charlie knows very well. Unfortunately for Vox, over the years visiting and delivering messages for the Morningstars, he's attracted a bit of a stalker in the radio demon. Which leads the overlord to becoming Charlie's sponsor when she opens her hotel in an attempt to actually meet the angel that accompanies his mind, that makes his heart flutter when he sees him in the sky. When Vox comes by to see the hotel and give his thoughts on redemption, Alastor is ready. He's in a brand new suit, a new coat, and he's sharpened his antlers. He also unconsciously attempts to scent the angel--not that Vox minds, he's used to Charlie rubbing up against his wings at times too. It's fine if her friends do it too.
Husker immediately knows what's going on and attempts to warn Angel Dust not to flirt with Charlie's angel uncle, not because he's Charlie's uncle, but because Alastor's in love with him, and Alastor DOESN'T share.
Charlie, being the sweetheart that she is immediately offers Vox a room and he say yes, and gets the room across from Alastor's. He of course changes it to his preferences, so now the final floor of the upstairs only has 2 large rooms, and a warring color scheme of blues and reds.
Alastor of course just gets worse and worse now consciously scenting the angel when he can, and bringing Vix gifts (and paying I.M.P ridiculous amounts of money to get fruits seeds and coco seeds so he can start garden just so he doesn't have to keep paying said Imps for said fruits and treats!)
Vox of course doesn't realize Alastor's attempting to woo him. He thinks they're great friends and that friends obviously have eskimo kisses (scenting) around 5-6 times a day, and they help each other with grooming/preening (Alastor with Vox's wings and feathers by plucking out the broken feathers and massaging oil in them, and Vox by helping getting rid of any stuck velvet.) And obviously friends share beds, cuddling together, Alastor being the big spoon during the night. They're friends. Obviously.
Husker snickers as Vox and Alastor share another eskimo kiss in front of the bar.
Hi! While I greatly appreciate this prompt, sadly I don't really have the motivation to work on this and I don't want to leave it rotting in my inbox while you wonder if anything has happened to it! It's a lovely idea and I hope to he able to write it out one day when I have the motivation to do so!
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mcufan72 · 2 days
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Sugar and Cinnamon
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Loki x female reader (AU)/ 18+
Chapter 11
Chapter 10
Warnings: contains fluff, smut, angst, unprotected sex, alcohol and cigarette consumption, soft!dom/sub vibes, toxic relationship, morally grey stuff, blackmailing, abusive and insulting behaviour
Note: I hadn't much time to write lately and I don't know when it's going to change... my job is killing me these days. This chapter took 10 days to get written and it became a very long chapter (~11k words), so get some snacks and something to drink. I hope you enjoy.
You looked at him, swallowed, took a deep breath and then you began to tell him how it all started…
…nearly six months ago:
“Can we talk?” You asked Ralph after entering his office.
“Don't you see that I don't have any time to talk to you right now,” he answered harshly and stressed while reading the contract documents concerning the new advertising contract his marketing agency was ready to sign. The big deal that would catapult him and his company to the top of the marketing agencies in North America. He ran his fingers nervously through his dark brown hair, keeping his brown eyes fixed on the documents. “ We can talk later!”
“No, we need to talk now,” you told him strictly.
It had been a long day at work today like every day lately and you two had barely time to talk. And you two not talking properly to each other had been for months now. You and Ralph and the team around you were stuck deeply in negotiations with a production company for luxury wristwatches and thanks to your superb knowledge of marketing strategies and your excellent conversation tactics you finally got the deal for the new marketing campaign and the assignment from the wristwatch manufacturer. No, Ralph got the deal, the agency was his company, not yours. You were just his account manager in a leading position and his girlfriend for five years.
What you had to tell him was urgent and you had to tell him now. You didn't want to postpone this important conversation for the umpteenth time just because he always pretended to not have time for you. But you were his girlfriend and fiancée-to-be on hold and he had to have time for you, for heaven's sake. He didn't even raise his head to look at you when you approached his curved glass desk.
“I leave!”
“Yeah, good. Go home and get some rest. I don't know when I'll be back home. Might be late. Take a bath, shave and get pretty for me. I don't want to see you in a worn-out t-shirt and that ugly butterfly-patterned pyjama bottoms when I come home. Wear something nice … wear the red negligee, you know I like it. We can ‘celebrate’ my deal then.” He still didn't look at you and you grinned annoyed, shaking your head lightly.
“That's not what I meant, Ralph.”
“Then explain.”
“I leave. I leave the company… and you!” You thought it would be harder to tell him that but I wasn't. It felt more of a relief. Your relationship with him was in a crisis for months at this point and when you got aware of it you recognised that you didn't love him anymore. The love you once had felt for him had already faded away some time ago. So you decided to leave him, with all the consequences. You didn't want to hold on to a relationship that didn't make sense anymore even if that meant you had to find a new job. But you didn't worry about that. You were good at what you were doing and finding a new job in the marketing business wouldn't be a problem for you. Also, you wanted to pick up your studies again so you would be perfectly qualified to run your own business one day.
“Yeah, okay… wait, you what?” Ralph finally looked at you, frowning and astonished.
“I leave the agency and you. Look, I'll stay until the contract is signed. It takes approximately four weeks for our lawyers to verify the conditions before the signing so I'll stay until then. That's enough time for you to look for a new assistant and account manager. And if you're being honest our relationship is at a dead end and I know you can feel it too. I'm sorry if my announcement takes you a bit off guard but we hardly spend time with each other for months now. You're barely at home. I have a feeling that you keep avoiding me. And when you are at home you never really want to talk to me, we just have quick sex and maybe we have dinner together and…Ralph, I don't want to beat around the bush but… I don't love you anymore. The feeling isn't there anymore. It's gone, possibly on both sides. You became so loveless with time. But okay, it happens, that's life and there's nothing wrong with that. We both have changed and we both should move on. A relationship without love… it simply doesn't make sense and I like things to make sense. Let us look at this fantastic deal as our final big success on the long haul and then we both can start new things. Everyone for themselves. I think that's just fair,” you explained in a strict but friendly tone.
Ralph was a good-looking man, tall with broad shoulders, short dark hair, and hazelnut brown eyes, charming and good with words. That was why you fell for him five years ago. Now you knew that wasn't enough, there was so much more a healthy relationship needed and he couldn't give it to you or he didn't want to give it to you. And now after five years, you knew him well enough to be sure that he wasn't the right man for you so you decided to end it without causing further complications.
“What a silly girl you are, darling,” and he stood up from his leather executive chair, grinning at you dismissively. “Who do you think you are, hm?”
“I'm a strong woman who knows what she wants and what she doesn't want. And I don't want to be together with you anymore because you don't see me. You don't even have much time for me anymore just when you want to have sex and need to get some steam off. And that's not enough, Ralph. I want more and I deserve more. Please, accept my decision and that I don't have any feelings for you anymore and that there's nothing left that would be enough for a relationship or a marriage. I'm also sure it's more than difficult to continue working together after ending our relationship. Please, don't make it more awkward than necessary.” A scornful laugh escaped his throat.
“You're so ridiculous and such a stupid girl. I'll tell you what you want… this!” and he made a presenting gesture with his arms to underline his statement. “You want this job, you want me, the money and the luxury life it allows us. The penthouse, the luxury cars, designer clothes, the exclusive holidays in the world's best hotels. Do you really want to give all that up, darling? Do you really want to tell me you never appreciated all that?” You didn't like the contemptuous tone in his voice as if he were looking down on you.
“I never said that. I do appreciate our privileged life and all the amenities we have and I always worked hard for it so that we can have this kind of lifestyle. But it has nothing to do with love, it's just material and I want more than that and there's no love anymore between us, and you know it as well as I do.”
“We, darling, we worked hard for it. It's my agency, and in the end, it's my money but in my generosity, I always shared with you,” he insisted.
You swallowed down the words you wanted to throw at him because you knew who in this agency was doing the real work. It was you and Ralph's other highly qualified employees. He only harvested the fruits of your hard work and celebrated successes as his merits. He never cared about the fact that success is rather a team result than an individual achievement. A fact that bothered you more and more and added to the fact that you were losing the love you once had felt for him.
“And I know you want me. You can't live without me, can you? I'm the only one who knows what you need and what's good for you, hm? Because I can feel it whenever we have sex,” he tried to convince you, rounding his desk and walking towards you.
There must be something wrong with his feelings because it seemed he never had recognised how often you had faked your orgasms. He always did it his way. Hard, fast, and always dominant and he hated soft lovemaking. At some point, you began faking your climax to get finished soon with the bedroom activities which became more and more unsatisfying for you because Ralph just satisfied his own needs. And when you did it you better do it without questioning his masculinity. After some time you became very good at it. You better because otherwise he would've been in a foul mood for days and everyone around him including you would've felt the consequences. He stood close to you and with his sweaty palm, he cupped your cheek and ran his thumb firmly over your lips as if he wanted to wipe away the things you just said from your mouth like spilt food. Once his touches made you feel good but these days were truly gone and you didn't want him to touch you ever again.
“We had such a wonderful time together and always had good sex, didn't we?” He asked you smugly. He already needed to get his ego pampered again. A shiver ran down your spine and it wasn't because of lust.
“You always had good sex, not me,” you stated dryly.
“Ts ts ts…Darling, it's not my fault, it's you who's a little frigid sometimes but when you're in the right mood you can be such a horny slut and you know how much I like that,” he snickered. He wasn't completely wrong, you indeed liked some kinky stuff.
“I'm not frigid, you never listened to me when I asked you for some… sexy stuff to try or what I wanted to do in bed. Don't blame it on me alone, okay!” You said angrily.
“Darling, did your mother teach you to lie, hm?” His hand still cupped your cheek and you tried to escape from his touch.
“Don't put my mother into this,” you spat and pushed his hand away. “Our sex was never that good, not for me at least. You often left me high and dry and you didn't even care about that or ask or listen to me when I wanted to talk with you about it and what I needed to be satisfied too. You never cared. You never truly cared about me, did you? Gosh, I was so blind. Did you even love me, Ralph?” The thought struck you like a blow. How could you haven't seen this much earlier? How money could change someone so much and how much could someone be so blinded by love?
“Love, love… who needs love or romance? Money and success, that's what counts. Love is overrated, love is for kids and dogs,” he lamented, bored by what you were talking about.
“So you never loved me,” you stated disappointedly.
“Oh, I do, darling. At the beginning of our relationship, I definitely did. You were hot and eye candy and arm candy as well. You were pretty much of a head-turner, and you still are and I enjoy others looking at my beautiful girlfriend, especially our customers and business partners. It led to many successful deals that you're that pretty and smart. C’mon, doll, we both know that feelings can change and become different in a relationship and yes, maybe you're not my dream girl and I'm not your dream boy anymore, but that's why we don't have to split up right now, darling. We're such a successful team. C’mon it's just a phase, you're overworked and stressed out. Take a few days off. Drive to our house in the Hamptons and then everything will be fine again, okay? We'll fix our disagreements later when you're back,” he tried to appease you. “Don't be a drama queen! You don't want to leave me, I know it.” Ralph told you arrogantly and went back to his executive chair to sit down and pay attention to the contract documents again.
“You really don't get it, do you? It's not a phase, Ralph. It's a fact and I will leave,” you replied firmly. Ralph stayed silent, obviously getting pissed off more with every second your conversation continued. A look of scorn filled his eyes before he spoke again, his eyes fixed on yours.
“I think you're forgetting one tiny little detail,” He told you sneakily.
“What little detail? What do you mean?” you asked puzzled and frowning.
“Well, don't you remember our…little secret?” He winked at you and smirked. You suddenly remembered what he meant. You felt nauseous and a lump building in your throat made it heavy for you to breathe.
“What are you implying?” A further wave of nausea washed over you. He would never do that, would he?
“What about publishing it, darling?” He grinned devilishly. “For everyone to see.”
“No! No Ralph you can't do that! Ralph, please! No!” You begged him quietly and desperately. You panicked and swallowed thickly.
“It's all up to you, darling!” He stood up from his chair again and walked over to where you still stood, shoving his hands into the pockets of his dress trousers. He leaned toward you, rage and injured vanity in his eyes. And there was something else in his eyes. Fear?
“No one, absolutely no one leaves Ralph Belmont. So how dare you? No one screws things up with me! Not even you! Do you understand me, darling?” His voice sounded threatening and his face was so dangerously close to yours that you could feel his breath fanning over your face, his nose nudging almost against yours.
“I give you two options,” and he turned away from you and walked over to the floor-to-ceiling windows.
“Option one: You stay with me and in my agency, everything we just talked about will be forgotten and our little secret stays our secret. Option two…,” he turned around to face you “...you can leave the agency and me but you'll pay for it. A redemption sum so to say. In exchange, I won't publish our secret. Your decision, darling.” He smiled arrogantly.
“I can't and I won't stay with you, Ralph. Sooner or later you'll have to accept that,” you answered. Did he just try to blackmail you?
“It's option two then. Okay, if that's what you want, no problem. 250000 dollars and you're free. You have six months to transfer the money to my bank account with the note ‘Loan Repayment’. I think that's enough time for you to get the money together. Your working contract is dissolved with immediate effect, also you no longer have access to our bank account. Any questions, darling? I just want to make sure that things make sense for you.” The self-satisfied smile that curved his mouth disgusted you.
“What kind of cruel game are you playing here, Ralph? Are you doing this just because it hurts your pride when I leave you? You don't love me, you never really did. You just confirmed it. Let me go. You've got enough competent employees in the agency and there are more than enough women in this city who are waiting for a man like you and who'll throw themselves on you as soon as you're free. Do you think I never noticed that? So many women want a good-looking, filthy-rich man like you to fulfil their every wet and material dream. Now they can have you, I'm not interested anymore. You're not that man anymore I fell in love with. The more money we made the more you changed, and not for the best. You're not the same anymore, I guess the money did go to your head and you still crave for more.”
“What are you implying, hm? That I cheated on you, darling? Why should I, I have you to warm my bed. You should appreciate that,” he said, self-satisfied. “What about you?" He knew that you weren't that kind of girl. You'd never do that.
“Wow, where do I send flowers? Screw you, Ralph. You're such an asshole,” you answered sarcastically and repulsed.
“Ts, ts, ts, this is getting annoying. Be very careful, darling you're skating on thin ice. We both know that you're a little slut, hm?” He said sweetly, sarcasm dripping from his voice. “250000 bucks in six months! Save the date!” He said harshly and quite emphatically.
“Where shall I take the money from? I don't have that much and you know that!” your desperation grew. Why did he treat you like that?
“Not my problem. You decided to leave me. Now you know the consequences it has.” He sat down again, leaned back against the leather chair's backrest and crossed his arms behind his head, his eyes fixed on your shocked face.
“What's this game you're playing? Are you really blackmailing me? And what do you mean by ‘redemption sum’? For what? I always worked for my money. I worked my ass off for it and only for your profit! You never paid your employees properly or gave them any praise for their good work and I agreed to get paid better pocket money, especially in the beginning when we were building up our existence here. I did it for the company, for you and us. I even dropped my studies in London for you so that we could both move here, to New York and start a life because you didn't want to go without me and didn't want to wait a few months more until I finished my degree too. I did it for us because I always thought there was an ‘us’. We were in a relationship, I thought you loved me and I thought it would be forever.”
“Aww, look at you, so desperate now. Darling, not my problem. It was your decision to leave me and don't complain now, you'll have enough time now to study again and finish your exams,” he stated with utter sarcasm. “I invested a lot of money in you, haven't I? You had enough pocket money to spend on expensive, meaningless things and you also spent the money from our bank account. It seems you don't appreciate it enough and the things I did for you. I could've bought so many other nice things with all that money if I hadn't have spent it on you and your fancy clothes, cars, and other stuff. You want to leave me? Then you have to pay for it. Everything in life has its price, darling. And never forget about the dirty little secrets in my safe. One wrong step, one wrong action and I'll publish them all over the city and beyond. I'll ruin you, darling, if I have to. You'll never be able to work in our industry again when I'm done with you and you don't even have to try to hire for a job with our competitors. I'll find out and let them know what kind of woman you are. No one will employ you, I'll make sure of that. Never forget that, darling,” he grinned at you, smugly and viciously.
“You're such a disappointment in every hindsight. I'm glad to get rid of you. Pick up your stuff from your office and the penthouse. I expect you to be gone when I get back home. And don't forget to turn off the lights when you go and leave the keys with the receptionist. And now get out of my office. I've work to do,” and he busied himself with the contract documents again.
"You're such a devilish prick, Ralph Belmont. I can't believe how much I loved you once and that I did everything for you. You were never worth it. Unfortunately, it took me too long to see it. You're less than the dirt under my stilettos which I only ever wore for you because I wanted to look pretty for the man I loved. And it was you who wanted all those meaningless and material things, you dolled me up with all these clothes and shoes… you don't even know what my favourite colour is,” you answered, your voice trembling with disgust and disappointment. Disappointment about him and even more about yourself for not looking through him much earlier.
“Watch your mouth, darling. If I were a slut like you I'd be very careful about provoking me. You don't have any chance against me. Don't forget, you have six months! And now get out of my eyes!”
“Screw you, you bastard,” you spat with quivering lips, turned around and left his office.
***
Loki didn't know what to say after you had finished telling him what had happened to you the day you decided to leave your boyfriend. Tears welled up in his eyes when he saw how deeply hurt you were and how desperate. He kept holding your hands and tried to comfort you as best as he could.
“After that, I cleared my office, drove to our penthouse, packed my bags and left. I slept for some days in my best friend’s house until I found this apartment to rent. An apartment I can't afford much longer.” Tears began to run down your cheeks.
“So you became an escort lady to earn money for a living because you can't work in your business anymore,” Loki said and wiped your tears away.
“Yes, I contemplated a lot about what job I could do outside the marketing business and shortly after I stumbled over Rhea's escort agency. I found out that working as an escort was the fastest way to earn a lot of money in a short time… and it's still not fast enough or enough money at all. I changed my looks for the evenings when I was escorting gentlemen to functions and named myself Candy. Ralph's former arm candy, perfect in wearing high heels and fancy clothes and already a slut according to Ralph's opinion about me, had found her new job as an escort lady. Unfortunately, I was rapidly forced into getting a call girl because not only has my rent increased, the rent I pay for my mother's nursery home has increased as well.”
“Your mother lives in a nursery home? What happened to her, sweets?” Loki wanted to know, seemingly full of concern and compassion. “It's the woman in the pictures, right?”
“Yes, it's her, my beloved mum. She had a stroke some time ago and has been in a wheelchair since then. She needs professional help and care and so I looked for the best nursery home for her. My father died years ago and I'm an only child, I'm all she has. Ralph always thought I'd spent my money for whatever unnecessary things but I didn't. I paid for my mother's health care and I also spared a part of my money and now this saved money saves my life. But it's getting less and it has never been that much to buy my freedom from Ralph.
It wasn't easy for me to tell Rhea that circumstances are forcing me to work as a callgirl now too. The sheer thought of sleeping with strangers for money scared me. I don't know if you believe me but there was only ever you who I could imagine having sex with. I could never have done it with anyone else. And I still regret faking my orgasm when we fucked for the first time. It wasn't because I wanted to fool you, it was because I didn't want to feel that good. You felt so good, Loki and you were so tender and caring and I wasn't used to being treated like that and being treated so lovingly, especially not from a stranger. I was afraid of catching feelings for you and I couldn't allow it. It would've broken my rules to never develop feelings for a client or to ever fall in love again. But I failed, I began to feel more for you than I should and I broke my rules but I don't regret it,” you smiled at him but you couldn't stop your tears from falling. Loki looked lovingly at you and squeezed your hands to reassure you that he believed you and that he was there for you no matter what.
“What did he mean by the ‘dirty little secret’ in his safe? With what is he blackmailing you, sweets?” Loki asked his voice calm and soothingly. You hesitated to tell him. You were so ashamed of what you had agreed to do with and for Ralph and you were afraid that Loki wouldn't want you anymore when he finally got to know the truth. He felt your insecurity and anxiety to tell him everything and it broke his heart how much your hands were trembling in his. He just wished you would finally open up to him completely so he could finally help you in the way you needed him to help you. You just feared he would never talk to you again or find you disgusting.
“He's blackmailing me with…,” you felt like you had to puke and you took a deep breath before you continued. “He's blackmailing me with nude pics and… a sex tape.” Your tear-filled eyes looked into Loki's, trying to find out what he was thinking about you, now that he knew what whorish things you had done. But Loki said nothing so you continued telling him the details while tears kept running down your cheeks.
“He took the pictures of me and filmed us during sex some time ago when we were madly in love… or that was what I thought we were. On my part, I definitely was in love with him. I was so naive… but I trusted him and so I agreed to it. I was so dumb, I should never have allowed him to take these pictures or make this private porn.”
“You're not dumb, sweets. You were in love and what is love when you can't trust your partner? Unfortunately, he didn't love you enough but you couldn't know that,” he tried to comfort you despite knowing there was no real consolation right now. “So he filmed you. What about him in this tape?”
“Yes, he did, you can see how I get fucked by him in several ways but… his face is never visible and I'm not sure anymore if he did it on purpose back then for whatever reason or really just for himself or ourselves. He got me on the dangle and I'm at his mercy.” A desperate sob escaped your throat and your gaze wandered through your small apartment. “I don't know what to do, Loki. I don't have that money and time is slipping through my hands. In a few days, it's payday and if I don't pay he'll publish it.”
The panic in your gut grew immediately. Loki felt bad for you. He had no problems with any form of sex or kinks but he couldn't handle that this asshole took advantage of you, your abilities and your body in every way possible all over those years and now turned your trust and the love you once had for Ralph against you. You loosened your hands from Loki's, shifted on the sofa and sat back against the sofa's backrest. You pulled your knees close to your chest, wrapped your arms around them and stared into the void. You didn't want to be afraid, you wanted to be happy and free again. You wanted to live without so much fear.
Loki felt the rage in his gut rising and getting stronger. The sight of you curled up on the couch and your knees drawn to your chest, your face pale and your eyes teary, didn't help to get rid of this feeling. You, his precious girl, didn't deserve to be treated like this.
“Maybe I should sell one of my kidneys or rob a bank to be able to pay him,” you said, laughing and irony scurrying over your face.
There was it again, your never dying, beautiful laughter, your untamed will to feel alive and be happy no matter how big the pain is. Loki adored you for this and he couldn't help but join you in your laughter and sarcasm for a moment.
“I got everything you told me so far, sweets but what did he mean with ‘redemption sum’? I still don't get this part,” Loki questioned curiously and frowned.
“He wants to make me pay back for everything he ever invested in me, I guess. Everything belongs to him, Loki. The money, the cars, the penthouse, the house in the Hamptons, he bought my designer clothes and evening gowns and dolled me up to his liking to parade me around. He paid for everything we did together like luxury holidays for example. He always said it's our common wealth and we both should enjoy it. I helped him to get this rich and I also helped him to reach all the goals he wanted to reach. But everything happened in his name for his company. I think, at some point, I wasn't my own person anymore. I did most of the work together with his other employees, and the more money he earned the less I mattered to him… and my love for him slowly faded away. He didn't even recognise that. Tells a lot about his character, I guess. That he now behaves how he behaves is most likely because I crushed his pride by leaving him and that he's blackmailing me is possibly the only way for him to hold power over me and to keep me in his company. I'm sure he knows very well how much he owes me. It's a cruel game he's playing with me and it doesn't make any sense to me. Most of all I despise my own stupidity in not refusing that damn photoshoot…and allowing him to film us having sex was the biggest mistake I've ever made. I don't understand why I agreed to make a private porn video. I'm so disgusted by myself.”
The embarrassment made your eyes welling up with tears again and you angrily wiped them away with your palms. You couldn't turn back the time or the decisions you made and there was just one way now: grin and bear it and get everything sorted out. Self-pitying wasn't helpful at this point.
“I never wanted all this mass of luxury, you know. Of course, I like nice things and going shopping for fancy stuff. But I don't crave it, I don't need all those fancy clothes and shoes or jewellery, holidays in expensive hotels and their overpriced presidential suites, or fancy six-course menus. He wanted all of this and put me in those clothes and pretty places. A small cosy cottage at a beach, a glass of wine on the porch, casual food at a beach bar, swimming in the ocean and my bare feet in the sand, dancing in the moonlight and having sex on the beach… that was what I wanted to do but he never listened to me or fulfilled these little dreams of mine. He always wanted it his way and I agreed because I loved him and was afraid to lose him. All I ever wanted was to live and to love someone and I wanna be loved by a man whose feelings for me are sincere and genuine. I wanna feel safe…and I want to give all of those feelings to someone who deserves all of this as much as I do. A normal, healthy life and a normal, healthy relationship. To always say yes to everything and to sacrifice myself and my wishes for someone else's success wasn't healthy, always playing the supportive role instead of the main role…that was far away from having an equal and healthy relationship. When there's one thing I've learned then it's that I have to love myself too and that I have a right to get my dreams fulfilled as well and that was the reason why I finally broke up with Ralph and the break-up brought me in this fucked up situation. I still don't know what is hurting me more. The fact that Ralph is blackmailing me or that he never truly loved me. I was just a means to an end. Maybe I should laugh about him. He's a weakling, a douchebag, unable to put something on his own, humanly a total loser and in general a loser in life too. He never cared about me or was overly interested in my life or cared about my mum. He only ever cared about money. I thought I'd spend the rest of my life with him, Loki, I thought it would be forever until I found out how he really is, how evil and devilish. He's a failure, a failure in a pinstripe suit. And now he wants to punish me for leaving him and spending ‘his’ money. He wants to ruin me and make me believe that I was the one who took advantage of him and lived at his expense.”
“But you worked for it, sweets. You worked harder for it than him. He has no right to demand and reclaim anything from you.”
“Yeah, you're right but there's nothing I can do about that. And it still feels like there's more about it, that I only know half of the truth about him. I'm sure there's more about it that he demands so much money from me.”
“Why didn't you report him, sweets?”
“He has connections everywhere, Loki. From the Police department to the best lawyers, he knows a lot of people with a lot of influence and he has all the money to pay them all well and buy himself free from criminal offenses. I wouldn't have a hint of a chance.”
“Why did you stay with him that long?”
“I don't know. Maybe because I didn't want to give up on my hopes that we could still have a future together. Maybe because we were too used to each other and clinging too much to old habits. Maybe it was the refusal to accept that our love had died at some point in time. Maybe I was afraid of being alone. I don't know. The only thing I know is that I didn't stay with him because of the money and the privileged lifestyle. The things I wanted weren't material. What I always missed over the years was the love and the adoration for each other. The richer he got the more heartless he became. The lack of love and care was the worst. And it took me too long to see it.” You began quietly sobbing and crying, every dam inside of you broke.
“Now you know my truth and I hope you understand now why I wanted to keep you out of this and left you that night. I told you that the real me has nothing to do with the pretty, carefree and sexy Sugar, my alter ego, the fake personality you fell in love with. I never intended to hurt you, Loki. I know I did and I'm so sorry for that. I totally understand if you want to go now because you deserve a better woman than me whose life is fucked up and whose sex life might be published all over the country in a few days.”
“You should know that I won't leave you alone, no matter what happens. Do you still not believe me that I'm in love with you? I don't care about what you did and why, you had no other choice and who am I to judge you? You still wanted me to stay despite what I did in the past. And you definitely didn't do anything wrong. I'll stay, I won't go.” Loki could deal with a lot of things. Hate, rejection, wrath, rudeness but not with you, his precious girl, sitting on your sofa blaming everything that had happened on you and crying a river because of that damn prick Ralph.
“Come here, sweets,” and he pulled you into his lap cradling you tight. He rubbed your back gently and you leaned against him, your head resting in the crook of his neck.
“I always knew that there's a wonderful, lovable and sweet person behind the mask named Sugar. I saw so many hints of it whenever we met and I'm glad that I have found this amazing woman. Have you any idea how strong you are? I promise you we'll figure out how to bring him down and we'll figure it out together.”
“Can you please hold me for a while? I need to be held by you, Loki,” and you began to cry again.
“Of course, as long as you want me to, sweets,” Loki kissed you softly on the forehead, rocked you slowly back and forth and just held you tightly until you felt better and had no more tears inside of you to shed.
“Please, sweets take my money and pay him and then…” he began to talk again.
“No, Loki, I won't do that,” you interrupted him quietly.
“Y/n please don't let us have this discussion again…” He begged you nicely.
“No, please don't get me wrong, Loki. It's not that I wouldn't take your money to pay him, which is extremely nice and generous of you. No, it's because I think he won't stop blackmailing me if I give him the money he demands from me. I'm pretty sure he won't stop blackmailing me because if he gets the money from me he might think I'm capable of paying more and that I can do it again and again. Believe me, he is that type of guy. He never gets enough, he's insatiable. I need to find another way. I'm afraid I need to talk to him again. Maybe… maybe I should… offer him to… to sleep with me one more time, maybe then he lets me go.” The thought made you shiver in disgust.
“This will never happen! He will never ever touch you again, y/n!” Loki said firmly and sternly. He carefully grabbed you by your shoulders and looked deeply into your teary eyes. “You're under my protection and I will never allow or accept this! Please, don't do this to me,” he told you desperately.
“I'm sorry, Loki, I'm so sorry, I won't do it, I promise but I really don't know what else to do…,” and you hugged him tightly. He wrapped his arms around your middle and pulled you closer to him.
“I'll find a way to stop him. I promise with all of my heart and soul, I'll stop him,” he cooed and buried his face in your hair. You were his, only his and he would protect you at all costs, always.
Out of nowhere your stomach growled and it made you both chuckle.
“It seems my queen is hungry and needs to get fed,” Loki answered and smiled at you.
“Your queen?” you asked him surprised and you were definitely hungry. No matter how big your problems were, you would never refuse to eat.
“Oh, right I forgot where you come from, I'm sorry Loki,” you continued genuinely and kissed his mouth tenderly.
“Yes, you're my queen, sweet thing and I can't have you starving. I have a suggestion. I'm doing groceries for some food and I cook something for us and you can clean up your apartment a bit. Then we eat and after lunch, you can finish your today's work and we spend the rest of the evening together… and the night if you want. What do you think, sweets? Would you like that?” Loki grinned from ear to ear, very proud of his irresistible proposal.
“You can cook?” you asked astonished. This man was just full of surprises and really cared about your well-being. And of course, you wanted him to stay.
“Yes, I can. I had a lot of time here to learn it,” Loki confirmed.
“Wow, you're really talented. You're amazing and I'm truly blessed with a man like you. Yeah, that's a really good plan. Thank you, Loki,” and you kissed him again. You could do this all day long and stay wrapped around him 24/7.
A knock at your entrance door interrupted your making out and you let go of each other's lips.
“Do you expect someone?" Loki asked and looked quizzically at you.
“No, I don't expect anyone,” and you got off of his lap. You took a sweatpants on and headed for the door to open it.
“Hello y/n, I'm very sorry for disturbing you but…”
“Walker!” and you hugged that rock of a man with genuine thankfulness. Your stormy embrace took him off guard and he shyly reciprocated your hug.
“You're not mad at me?” He asked you insecurely. You let go of him and looked at him.
“How could I be mad at you? You helped my man to find me and brought him back to me. And I'm so grateful for it, Walker. Thank you, thank you for your help, you risked a lot for us,” you told him and gave him an amicable kiss on his cheek. Walker was taken aback by it, he never expected this adorable behaviour of yours and he slightly blushed but he always knew what a wonderful person you were so he wasn't really surprised. You were lovely and that's why he always cared that much about you.
“Will you tell Rhea?” He wanted to know.
“No, Walker, I won't tell her. If she should find it out by herself I won't lie to her, she always has been good to me and so have you. I would explain to her why you did it and I would fight for you. You won't lose your job, I promise,” you reassured him. Loki appeared behind you and wrapped one arm around your waist, placed his hand on your stomach, kissed your cheek and looked at Walker, smiling.
“Thank you, y/n, I appreciate it. You have a heart of gold. Is everything okay so far?” Walker looked smilingly at both of you and Loki pulled you closer to his body, his chin leaning at your temple.
“Yes!” You both answered simultaneously and smiled brightly at Walker and he told you he was glad to hear that. He could see how happy you two were despite knowing that you were still in some kind of danger he didn't know anything about.
“Could you do me a favour, Walker?” Loki asked him.
“Of course, Sir.”
“Could you please drive me to a grocery store, I'd like to buy some foodstuff, this beautiful lady here in my arms is starving and I can't have that. I just get fully dressed and then we can drive off.”
“No problem, Sir, I wait by the car for you,”
“Thanks, Walker. Give me five minutes,” Loki said. Walker nodded once and smiled at you, turned on his heels and left. He could go with a good conscience and to see you so lucky in all your misery and together with the man you visibly loved was worth it to risk his job.
Loki got dressed and kissed you goodbye.
“You come back to me, right?”
“Of course, I will come back to you, sweets.” He held your head in his big hands, his thumb pads gently rubbing over the soft skin of your cheeks, and kissed the tip of your nose.
“Will you open the door for me when I'm back from doing the groceries, my precious girl?” He asked you softly. You took his hands gently from your face and walked over to your dresser to take something out of a small wooden bowl.
“You can let yourself in, handsome. Can't wait to have you back,” you said quietly, kissed him shortly but passionately and gave him your keychain with the key to your apartment. Loki smiled at you, astonished that you gave him your keys without hesitating.
“I'll be back soon, sweets,” he answered, gave you a further quick, loving kiss and left.
When Loki came back you had put things in order in your apartment, your table wasn't a complete disaster anymore and it would be much easier for you to get back to work later. He immediately began to prepare the ingredients he needed for cooking a tasty meal for you. You two decided to eat at the kitchen counter and you prepared two places with cutlery and napkins. Loki forbid you to do more than this. He wanted you to take some rest and he also wanted to spoil you with his cooking skills and his care. You couldn't do anything about it, so you obeyed and just watched him stirring in a pot and frying fish in a pan. It smelled delicious and Loki cooking in your small kitchen was a sight to behold. A literal demi-god, devastatingly beautiful and sexy in his tightfitting t-shirt, was cooking in your kitchen, and he did it for you.
You were on the edge of crying again. His ways to show you his love and affection were adorable and you were still convinced that you didn't deserve it. You rounded the kitchen counter and hugged him from behind, shoving your hands under his t-shirt and letting your fingertips trail over his defined abs in lazy circles up to his pecs to caress his chest hair. You couldn't resist touching him. You needed to reassure yourself that he was real and that you weren't daydreaming.
“Don't you dare distract me, sweet thing,” he groaned jokingly.
“I'm hungry,” you whined and pressed a firm kiss between his clothed shoulder blades.
“I know, sweets and it seems you want the dessert before the main course,” he teased you and turned around to face and hug you. Your hands were still under his shirt and caressed now the firm muscles of his back.
“The best comes last,” you teased him back and bit lightly into your lower lip. You felt the muscles of his thighs and his crotch tightly pressed against your lower parts and you let your hands trailing down to his butt, squeezing it and pressing him even closer to you.
“I think you have to be patient, sweet thing. Before you'll get your special dessert I have a sweet little surprise for you,” he said to increase your anticipation. It was just now that he realized that you had touched his bare skin again without his permission. Why did it feel that good, dangerously good? Your warm hands on his body lit a fire in him again and he wanted it to burn forever. Your hands on him were dangerous but one of the best feelings he ever felt.
“Can't wait for it,” you mumbled, tilted your head, and latched your lips onto his. You would never get enough of this man's soft lips and his delicious taste. If only you knew what it was that made his kisses that tasty.
“We can eat now, sweets. Take a seat, I will serve you the food,” and he let go of your mouth and body and prepared two dishes with the freshly cooked food.
“Et voilà, freshly fried salmon on a bed of spicy spinach leaves and some rice as a side dish with a light herbal sauce. Enjoy your meal, my love,” and Loki placed your dish with an elegant movement in front of you. Did he just call you ‘my love’? Never before had a man called you like this and you never felt so loved by a man. And it felt so normal like you two were in a serious relationship but maybe it went way too fast and way too easy.
“Thank you so much, Loki. It looks gorgeous,” and you dipped your fork into the fish and the spinach and shoved it into your mouth. The wonderful taste of it on your tongue made you moan almost indecently and your reaction made Loki smile. He loved how sensually you enjoyed food.
“It's delicious, I love it. It's the best dish I've eaten in two weeks.”
“I'm happy you like it, sweets,” Loki responded and he also started eating. You didn't talk much during your lunch, you just enjoyed each other's company. Loki's little surprise for you was a chocolate mousse with fresh strawberries and he couldn't resist feeding you this sweet treat, well knowing that you would never deny a good dessert.
In the afternoon you continued writing your thesis and Loki sat on your sofa, reading one of the books he had taken from your bookshelf. He didn't disturb you, he was just there and his sheer presence filled you with calmness and security. It was balm to your soul in all the stress and anxiety you were suffering these days. In the evening you watched a movie together but you didn't follow the plot because you soon ended up heavily making out and Loki carried you to your bedroom, his lips never leaving yours. You two hurriedly took your clothes off and continued kissing and touching each other's bare skin. You did it slowly and gently and you weren't in a hurry anymore as soon as you were cuddling under the sheets. All the touches made Loki's cock twitch and you felt the wetness between your thighs becoming more with every passionate kiss he gave you.
“Mark me, Loki. I want everyone to know that I belong to someone, that I belong to you,” you whispered to his ear and continued kissing him and playing with his curls.
“Are you sure, sweets? I don't want to bruise your perfect skin. You're too precious to me,” he answered softly and brushed your hair tenderly out of your face.
“Yes, I want it, I want you to mark me as yours,” you asked him.
He gave you a soft, passionate kiss first before his lips travelled further down to your throat and the most sensitive spot under your ear. He placed a tender kiss right to your pulse point before he sucked and nibbled that erotic zone of yours until he saw a violet mark appearing on your skin. He licked gently over the bruise and blew some air over it to soothe the sweet pain he had caused. All the moans you made and the way you were writhing underneath him while he was kissing you had already made him harden and you felt him rolling his hips against your thigh. Then he was on top of you, pressing his engorged cock against your thigh and moistening it with pre-cum. Your hard nipples rubbed against his chest with his every movement and it made him moan and tremble because it felt so good on his skin. Your hands were roaming all over his body and caressing him. He never wanted to miss this feeling ever again. He felt you shifting beneath him and opening your legs for him. He rolled his hips against yours and with his shaft he rubbed over your inner labia and your clit. Your soft moans and your tight grip on his back and his nape caused goosebumps on his heated skin. The tip of his cock teased your entrance and when he was about to slide in you tenderly stopped him.
“Don't you want to blindfold me? If you want you can tie up my wrists too,” you trusted him enough to allow him to do it and to surrender to him.
“No, I want you to touch me. Touch me here,” and he gently took your hand and placed it to his sternum where his heart was beating hurriedly. “Make me feel I'm breathing, I'm living, make me feel worthy of your touch, worthy of your love. I want you to look at me and I want to look into your eyes when you cum, sweets.” In his eyes, you saw he was serious and he truly wanted it.
“So whenever you blindfolded me, you did it not just for the kink. You wanted to hide from me. I didn't imagine the blue shimmer under your skin, right? It has something to do with you being a Jotun,” you concluded, tenderly running a thumb over his cheek.
“You didn't imagine it, I'm sorry that I told you otherwise. I was scared and I didn't want to scare you off. When I have strong feelings for the woman I mate with, I may lose control and can't keep up the appearance you're used to. And being touched by your hands just adds to the sensation. And also my skin feels different then. These are the reasons why I didn't want you to touch me.” Loki was afraid you would demand him to stop and get off of you immediately but you didn't.
“You don't scare me off, you never could,” you whispered and pulled him down to kiss him ardently. “Go on, Loki, I need you,” you pleaded him sweetly.
“Sure?”
“Absolutely sure,” and he slid himself inside you until he was completely seated inside of you.
His strokes were deep and slow and he made the sweetest love to you. He was so tender and careful, with utter gentleness he caressed and kissed every part of your body he was able to reach in this position.
“I love you so much, I don't want to live without you anymore. Please, never run away again, sweets,” he asked you between his lingering kisses.
“You're my everything, Loki. I missed you so bad, I'm so glad to have you back, that you haven't given up on me. I will never run away from you again,” you murmured and you scratched lightly with your fingernails over the soft skin of his muscled back. You gave featherlight kisses to his cheeks and his forehead. His skin was glistening with a thin layer of sweat and your touches made him shiver. His strokes got sloppier and his moans more intense. You felt how close he was but he still held back. He could tell you wouldn't cum yet, together with him. He looked at you with asking eyes, unsure if he should go on or take care of your pleasure first. You sensed his hesitation but you gave him a reassuring glance to continue.
“I'm okay, don't worry. It feels good, don't stop. Come for me, Loki. Come undone for me, my precious boy, I have you,” you whispered against his lips and his speed increased. He groaned silently, his hips drawing back and pushed forward again, his throbbing cock thrusting deep into your pulsating cunt. You weren't on the brink of climaxing yet but it didn't matter. You enjoyed the intimacy and how close he was to you, how soft his skin felt under your fingertips, and how passionately he gave himself to you. There wasn't any pressure for you to orgasm and whoever told you to make love in missionary pose is boring was a liar. Nothing felt better or more intimate and intense. You definitely enjoyed it.
“Let go, my love, fill me with your cum, make me happy, let me feel you” and you trailed your fingers gently up from his lower back to his shoulders and his biceps. When you felt his whole body tighten and his moans getting more desperate, you spread your legs wider and grabbed his ass cheeks and squeezed them firmly. You knew he was about to cum. “That's it, you're allowed to cum Loki, give it all to me. Don't hide, you can show me who you are,” you murmured, kissing and caressing his throat and his face with your lips and tightening your grip on his butt.
“Oh fuck…,” and with your name on his lips he came, violently and delightfully moaning, feeling your cunt clenching around his sensitive tip and when you felt him releasing his warm seed into you you came too, silently, calmly, intensely, bathing in the sweet feeling of being loved and craved. You kissed each other passionately, intensifying the orgasmic bliss. You locked your legs around his waist because you knew how much he liked that and also you were not yet willing to let him go. You loved this feeling of his still throbbing cock inside of you. His kiss burned torturously sweet on your lips and you could barely stand the feeling of the weight of his body on top of yours and you really had underestimated how much you needed this, how much you needed him.
Loki broke the kiss and rested his forehead against yours, trying to catch his breath. You both didn't say anything, you just looked at each other and enjoyed this feeling of satisfied lust and love. You caressed Loki's scalp and scratched his nape tenderly, watching the hint of the blue colour under his skin and the red shimmer in his eyes slowly fading away. Loki gently caressed your cheeks and kissed the tip of your nose tenderly.
“Are you alright, sweet thing?” he murmured, softly pressing a further tender kiss to the tip of your nose. Instead of an answer he felt your legs clenching more firmly around his hips and your deep purr of contentment made him feel safe and wanted.
“I really didn't scare you? I…I couldn't show it to you completely yet, I'm still too used to hiding it. I think I need some time to understand that you would accept me nonetheless,” Loki mumbled shyly.
“Take all the time you need. You decide when it feels right for you and then you can show me your ethereal beauty,” Loki kissed you tenderly and thankfully and couldn't believe that you were so understanding in every respect.
“I wished we had met under different circumstances,” you whispered while you gave him several pecks on his lips, some sadness in your voice.
“Honestly, I'm pretty sure we did,” Loki said, convinced and moved his body from yours to lay on his side. You rolled to your side too so you could face him and propped up on one elbow, your head resting on your palm.
“What do you mean?”
“Do you remember the day when we first met at Vivian's Velvet? Rain was pouring down that day. I had just called Rhea, made an appointment with an escort lady, which was you, and was on my way home when a hooded woman bumped into me.”
“This is nothing unusual in Manhattan.”
“It's not, you're right. I couldn't see her face but I remember the shoes she was wearing…dark-green trainers like yours. It's my favourite colour and that's why the trainers caught my eye,” Loki continued and you frowned and looked quizzically at him.
“You mean, we could've had a meet-cute, flirting, dating and all that lovely kitschy stuff others have when meeting accidentally somewhere? Because… I remember I was in a hurry to Rhea's agency and I bumped into someone with an umbrella… it was…”
“... me, the man with the umbrella. And I'm sure I saw you a second time, in the hallway of the hotel after our first night, when I lost my scarf. I went back to the hotel suite to look for it and a woman walked past me. I greeted her but she didn't answer. She was busy looking for something in her bag and I couldn't see her face, it was hidden behind her hair. And she was wearing dark-green trainers, the same again as yours.” You swallowed thickly, you clearly remembered that night.
“Yeah, I remember. I was looking for my biscuits in my bag because I was a bit hungry and… I didn't answer because I had my earplugs in and was listening to music, I didn't even recognise walking past someone.
“And there was a third time. In Central Park, one sunny afternoon I was sitting on a bench and reading a book. When I randomly looked up, two women passed by, I just saw them from behind, one of them talking nonstop to the other woman… and this woman…”
“...wore the same dark-green trainers like mine?” You completed his sentence. “I'm sure it was me and my friend Gabby, we met one afternoon in Central Park and on our way home she talked a lot,” you laughed and you couldn't believe how many chances there had been to meet Loki in the streets and he couldn't believe it either.
“Besides I don't know what I would have done, it's amazing how many times we ran into each other, how close we had been to each other without knowing it,” you realized.
“But it wasn't meant to be for us. Our way is a different one, more complicated but we'll go this way together. I'm sure everything should exactly happen the way it happened. At least it doesn't matter. We're together now and that's the only thing important to me. Come here, sweets,” and Loki pulled you into his arms and hugged you tightly.
“You're right, and I'm just happy to have you here. Thank you for being here and holding me.” You enjoyed his proximity for a moment before you continued to speak.
“Loki, I'm not sure if I'm ready for a new relationship yet. It terrifies me. I might need some time to get over my bad experience and I hope you understand that it's not easy for me to love someone again.”
“Your scars need time to heal, sweets and I'll give you all the time you need. I also know it's not easy to love me. I'm an otherworldly creature with a dubious past and how could I expect an angel like you to love a sinner like me that easily.”
“You stop saying that right away, okay? That's not the reason. You're wonderful! A loveable, attentive and sensual man, you're everything a woman can dream of… everything I'm dreaming of. It's me, Loki. My life is so fucked up, and you deserve better, a better woman than me…I really wish we would've met under different circumstances… the girl in the rain…”
“...bumping into the man with the umbrella…Now you stop saying that right away, sweets. You're gorgeous, and you are the one for me and I say it again, I'll give you all the time you need,” and he tightened his grip on you, kissing you softly.
“Loki, I would've slept with you without taking money from you because I never really wanted you to pay for me. I just want to be yours and yours only,” you whispered tiredly and snuggled up closer to him.
“And I would've paid any price for you just to be with you and to make sure that no other man touches and hurts what is mine,” he answered quietly with his wonderful velvety voice.
To the sound of his heartbeat, you fell asleep on his chest, protected by his strong arms which were still firmly wrapped around you as if he were afraid you could be gone when he woke up in the morning.
“I'll do this one thing for you and make sure that this son of a bitch will never hurt you again,” Loki whispered into the darkness of your bedroom and placed a tender kiss on your forehead. But you didn't hear him because you were already sleeping and with you closely snuggled up to him he closed his eyes and fell asleep too.
The next morning when you woke up the place in your bed next to you was cold and empty. For a moment you thought he was gone and you suddenly understand how he must've felt when he woke up that morning without you. It was a horrible feeling. But then you heard some noises from the main room of your apartment. You got off the bed and walked over to where the sounds came from. There was Loki, nearly fully dressed already and about to leave.
“What are you doing?” you asked him surprised.
“Hey, good morning, my sweet thing. You're awake. I didn't want to wake you up. I just need to do something before we have breakfast. I'll be back soon, my love. Take your time and enjoy a hot shower until I'm back. I won't take long, I promise,” he explained to you. Something seemed a bit off but you couldn't explain what it was.
“See you later, my sweet girl and I'll prepare a wonderful breakfast for you when I'm back,” and he kissed you passionately goodbye. There was something very erotic about him being fully dressed and you still being naked. You found it irresistibly indecent and arousing.
“Sounds very promising, handsome. I'll be waiting for you to come back soon,” you told him softly.
You smiled brightly after he had closed the door and you took a mug from the cupboard to make you a coffee. You couldn't wait to have him back soon though he had just left but you already missed him. You thought about yesterday and last night, about how Loki had been there for you and listened to you and about your adoration and blooming love for Loki when it suddenly hit you like a rock.
‘You're a fallen angel, someone has broken your wings and if I ever find this cruel prick who hurt you so much, I'll kill him’
‘Don't make any promises you'll never keep, Luke’
‘I'll find a way to stop him. I promise with all of my heart and soul, I'll stop him ‘
“Oh my god Loki, no… no nono no… Don't do this…no…” you panicked and nearly dropped your coffee mug. You suddenly knew what it was he needed to do before breakfast. He surely was on his way to pay a visit to Ralph. He was willing to risk his freedom for you, willing to help you, no matter what it might mean to him or the consequences it could have for him. Never before have you got showered and dressed that quickly. Hopefully, it wasn't too late to keep him from falling into calamity.
Last night before he fell asleep with you nestled in his arms, sleeping peacefully, he knew what he had to do. He remembered who he was and what he was capable of. He was a prince, a king, a fighter and still the god of mischief and trickery.
He was willing to write a new story for you and hopefully, he would be a part of it too in one way or another. He was on his way to fight for your honour and freeing you from Ralph and nothing could stop him from doing it.
🌹🥂🥃🌃🌹🥂🥃🌃❤️🌹🥂🥃🌃🌹🥂🥃🌃
@faesimps @gruftiela @lokisprettygirl @anukulee @fandxmslxt69 @foxherder @depressedpolishgirl @buttercupcookies-blog @chantsdemarins @fictive-sl0th @justjoanne242 @km-ffluv @stupidthoughtsinwriting @lovingchoices @wheredafandomat @lokixryss @huntress-artemiss @smolvenger
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agayconcept · 1 year
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#scuse me while i have a literal breakdown by my new hair stylist RUINED my hair so badly it will take MONTHS to grow it back and fix it#then i got on a bus only to be berated and harassed for using a cane 'while so young'#and referring to myself as disabled bc 'i dont like that word u shouldnt use it' and they wouldnt stop even when asked / i moved seats#then miss the second bus due to the ensuing anxiety attack i had#then tried to get on third bus only to find out they moved the stop several streets over which i cant walk#so now ive had to add a fourth or even fifth bus into the mix bc i cant afford a cab rn#i....i am going to get home and collapse. for real. i want to curl up in a ball and cry and die.#i am just. so tired and upset and defeated ugh#and also FILLED WITH RAGE about my hair. bc the woman heard me saying 'no dont do that!' and DID IT ANYWAY#and changed my hairline by like 2 inches#and its gonna take at least 4 months to grow back enough i can fix it. she basically fuckin scalped me. i am so angry and so embarrassed#i look awful. thank FUCK its in the back mostly so i can hide it under hats which i usually wear anyway#but now i HAVE to wear hats for at least 4 months. jfc.#so. fucking. mad. def never going back for a haircut again#will do the dye there bc theyre the ONLY salon that will order in that brand#but will be going elsewhere for hair cuts. so fucking mad ugH#she was so rude too wtf#what an awful fucking day#Ducky's Terrible Horrible No Good Very Bad Day
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fozmeadows · 6 months
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the older I get, the more the technological changes I've lived through as a millennial feel bizarre to me. we had computers in my primary school classroom; I first learned to type on a typewriter. I had a cellphone as a teenager, but still needed a physical train timetable. my parents listened to LP records when I was growing up; meanwhile, my childhood cassette tape collection became a CD collection, until I started downloading mp3s on kazaa over our 56k modem internet connection to play in winamp on my desktop computer, and now my laptop doesn't even have a disc tray. I used to save my word documents on floppy discs. I grew up using the rotary phone at my grandparents' house and our wall-connected landline; my mother's first cellphone was so big, we called it The Brick. I once took my desktop computer - monitor, tower and all - on the train to attend a LAN party at a friend's house where we had to connect to the internet with physical cables to play together, and where one friend's massive CRT monitor wouldn't fit on any available table. as kids, we used to make concertina caterpillars in class with the punctured and perforated paper strips that were left over whenever anything was printed on the room's dot matrix printer, which was outdated by the time I was in high school. VHS tapes became DVDs, and you could still rent both at the local video store when I was first married, but those shops all died out within the next six years. my facebook account predates the iphone camera - I used to carry around a separate digital camera and manually upload photos to the computer in order to post them; there are rolls of undeveloped film from my childhood still in envelopes from the chemist's in my childhood photo albums. I have a photo album from my wedding, but no physical albums of my child; by then, we were all posting online, and now that's a decade's worth of pictures I'd have to sort through manually in order to create one. there are video games I tell my son about but can't ever show him because the consoles they used to run on are all obsolete and the games were never remastered for the new ones that don't have the requisite backwards compatibility. I used to have a walkman for car trips as a kid; then I had a discman and a plastic hardshell case of CDs to carry around as a teenager; later, a friend gave my husband and I engraved matching ipods as a wedding present, and we used them both until they stopped working; now they're obsolete. today I texted my mother, who was born in 1950, a tiktok upload of an instructional video for girls from 1956 on how to look after their hair and nails and fold their clothes. my father was born four years after the invention of colour televison; he worked in radio and print journalism, and in the years before his health declined, even though he logically understood that newspapers existed online, he would clip out articles from the physical paper, put them in an envelope and mail them to me overseas if he wanted me to read them. and now I hold the world in a glass-faced rectangle, and I have access to everything and ownership of nothing, and everything I write online can potentially be wiped out at the drop of a hat by the ego of an idiot manchild billionaire. as a child, I wore a watch, but like most of my generation, I stopped when cellphones started telling us the time and they became redundant. now, my son wears a smartwatch so we can call him home from playing in the neighbourhood park, and there's a tanline on his wrist ike the one I haven't had since the age of fifteen. and I wonder: what will 2030 look like?
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beegalactica · 2 months
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real 'glow up' advice i wish i had
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Imagine getting to the point in life where YOU are your own vision board; where you are that girl who has the life that you want, and you don't have to seek it out through other people. That should be the ultimate goal.
Here are subtle things that you should be doing to channel your ideal person and improve yourself for the better FROM THE INSIDE
take care of your hygiene: brush your teeth every day, wash your face with soap, wash your hair, take meaningful showers
be kind to yourself: speak nicely to yourself, treat yourself every now and then, love yourself exactly the way you came
make the effort: do your hair and wear something cute, even if you're only going to the supermarket. I bet your ideal self looks stunning wherever she goes, so make that effort if you really want to become her
move your body: dance to some music for just 5 minutes, take a walk, get off the bus a (reasonable) few stops earlier and walk the rest of the way
romanticise the hell out of your life: wear those bows, create that vision board, play that aesthetic background music even if you're just washing the dishes, wear that outfit!!!!!
admire yourself: look at yourself in the mirror and remember what you look like, take a million selfies to look back and smile at, give yourself a compliment every time you pass your reflection
get creative: if you want cute decor, make it! if you want cute clothes, find some easy DIYs!
focus on what you can control: if you cannot change the situation, let it resolve itself. don't waste your precious time obsessing over something you cannot change
get to know yourself (again): rediscover your hobbies, try new activities, learn to appreciate your solitude, get out of your shell
I really wish I was part of a community like this when I was going through a really insecure and lonely phase of my life.
Instead of deciding to wake up a 3am every day from now on, and trying to reach 20k steps every day, start small and walk your way up to greatness!
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etfrin · 5 months
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⤷❝ The Quiet Gift | Coriolanus Snow❞ˎˊ-
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⇢☾Warning: NSFW | squirting, Snow is his own warning, mentions of killing, possessiveness, fingering (f. receiving), bathroom sex, mirror sex, semi-public sex (there was a gala), pinv sex, creampie, unprotected sex (wrap it dumbfucks), dumbfication if you squint, dom sub undertones, degradation, ownership kink, breath play with a twist | lmk if I forgot anything!
⇢☾Pairing: young president Coriolanus Snow x fem! Reader
⇢☾Summary: continuation of the arranged marriage au, this is your one year anniversary with him with a gala held in place to celebrate, you get insecure because of some bitches and Coryo fucks you in the bathroom with sprinkles of your daily life with him.
⇢☾Request: this is a request (idk if i’m writing it in the write place im new to tumblr i usually use wattpad) young coriolanus snow bathroom mirror sex like him making u watch ur self come undone in the mirror
⇢☾A/N: enjoy everyone! And to one who requested, hope you like this! :) this might be my last post of this theme btw, i am getting sick of the blue :/
arranged marriage au: the study, mine to love
< masterlist > < bc: @cafekitsune > < tag list >
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A year had passed of your marriage, a bond between two souls which wasn't much of a lie as before. Things with Coryo were better than you could ever expect. You thought he would isolate himself from you after your confession but so much had changed. He had gotten softer but more possessive. His edges are sharp yet he makes sure it's a shield for you, not something that would make you bleed.
Among his actions include changing your entire wardrobe (not without your opinion first), a library that connects to his office (his office is something you have access to at all times now), his room was now yours both (your favorite change), and last but not least a poison taster was included so that no attempts of assassination at the First Lady could be taken.
At first, you thought it to be extra, but knowing that it would put his paranoid mind at peace you allow it without much to say. He picked out your outfit every day, and sometimes you did the same for Coriolanus. He would frown as you decide what to wear or not for him for the day, knowing that some of the pieces don't match his style but when he sees your smile as you pick out the clothes. He smooths his frown and takes whatever horrible fashion statement you created for him and wears it with pride.
If anyone dared to speak up about it, he proudly said that his wife picked it out and everyone knew better than to speak a single ill word of the unspoken Queen of Panem.
Today was one of those days when you decided to pick his outfit. Today was something special after all. One year had passed since you had become Mrs. Snow, and a gala was to be held tonight to celebrate the union.
So yes, you were going to pick his outfit. You had even woken up early because of it. You giggled as you opened your eyes, your arm around Coryo whose hair looked impossibly messy, sticking out everywhere. It made him look years younger than he was. You chuckled at the sight, your heart clenching with the love you have for this man. You lean forward to press a kiss to his forehead and then his cheek. You whispered, not expecting him to wake up until his alarm rang, “Good morning, Coryo”
You quietly slipped away from the bed and tiptoeed to the closet. The closet you both shared now. One side carrying every single piece of your clothing and the other side his. You wanted to pick out something different for your husband once, sick of seeing him in his white shirts and black vest. That's how you picked out a black suit with a white vest and a red silk shirt. You could imagine unbuttoning this off of him tonight and the thought made your body heat up and a giggle escaped your lips.
“What are you laughing about, doll?” A voice, his deep sleepy voice startling you. “Nothing!” You quickly said, turning to look at Snow, your breath hitching as his eyes were half closed and his hair turned into a mess of curls. Sometimes you wonder if this was all a fever dream and if you truly have the privilege of seeing him like this. You placed the clothes into a corner and went to him.
You pulled him down, your hand on his nape and another on his cheek as you guided him to your lips. Morning breath be damned. His actions were reflexive with how his arms pulled you in closer as his lips pressed into yours. He smiles against your lips and soon both of your tongues tangle in an uncoordinated sleepy manner and you whimper into his mouth.
This was real. This was your reality and you would do everything to keep it as it is. You pulled back and he whispered, “What was that for, doll?”
“Just needed to make sure this was real,” you answered him. Your words make him crack a real smile, something even you saw rarely and it would only be possible in moments like this. Moments when you have shocked the man with your actions and words and made him fall harder for you.
“Well it is,” he grins. Before his expression clears up he focuses on the clothes you have set aside. “Outfit for today?” He asked. You nod and smile at him, gesturing at the clothes. “You would look handsome in them,” you said. “Don't I always look handsome?” He smirks, you laugh, “I am not falling for that trap, dear husband. I'll be in the shower, choose something for me.” You press a kiss on his cheek before leaving the closet.
After showering and wearing the red dress he had decided, both of you go on for your respective duties. The gala would start early in the day and there were a few hours left before it formally started as guests were already coming in.
The mansion was set up beautifully, no words could have possibly explained the amount of work and dedication to make this the event of the year, valued higher than the Hunger Games itself. In another universe, it may not have been possible, in this one however you somehow managed to crack into his heart and made yourself a higher priority.
You were doing finishing touches of your makeup when Corio came in, his hair slicked back but his body tense, his eyes unable to hide the shakiness in them. You don't say anything, letting the man have his moment of vulnerability. You knew you would mess him up even more if you pointed it out, so you continued your task.
You didn't pay him any attention despite the itch to turn to him. You force yourself to stare straight into the mirror, applying your lipstick for the night. That was until he came behind you, his arms around your waist and pulled you against his chest, his head propped on your shoulder as you felt him take deep breaths.
You don't ask if anything is wrong, accepting the rare form of intimacy he initiated. Usually, you're the ones for the hugs, the genuine ones anyway. You knew despite everything you were like a math equation to Snow. His mind figured out the formulas to keep you to him forever, you doubted if he saw anyone as his equal but you were perhaps the closest thing to it.
You had accepted it long before, but moments like this when Coriolanus allowed himself to be a human meant everything to you. You fell for every version of him, the one that is an untouchable deity who could kill you without guilt, and the human he was, obsession filling in veins making you the sole objective of his mind as he already achieved Panem.
You close your eyes, taking deep breaths with him. In the end, you were human too and you broke. “What's wrong?” You asked, as softly as possible yet breaking the bubble that had formed.
He smirks through the mirror, his eyes meeting yours, a sense of superiority in the blue hues. “Nothing’s wrong, my doll,” he whispered to you, pressing a ghost-like kiss to your bare shoulder. His arms cage you tighter, making a small gasp on your lips. “Okay,” you smile at him.
“Ready to start the gala then?” You asked, “Snows are born ready,” he replied, his tone smug.
One of his arms was kept wrapped around his waist while the other opened a drawer to take out a small box. “For you,” he whispered, pressing a kiss to your neck. You opened the box, and in it was a gold necklace with the initial ‘S’. You blush, and leave it to Corio to give you a necklace with his initials for an anniversary gift. “It’s beautiful,” you whispered, your head turning back and you gave him the brightest smile. “Help me wear it?” You mumbled as you handed him the box.
And so he did, and now a necklace was on your neck, the letter ‘S’ sitting perfectly on your skin. It scratched an innate itch for Snow to see you wear this. A part of him had expected you to fight, and be disgusted by this action, his mind thinking of several ways to make (force) you to wear the necklace. But as always you surprised him with your acceptance, as if you knew that wearing this would help him with his possessiveness. You were truly the right woman for him.
With his arm around your waist, you walk into the celebration. Countless people, the top elites of the Capitol were attending the gala. Everything had to be perfect.
Alas, fate is nothing but fickle.
The rumors didn't catch your ears at first before slowly the whispers caught up to you. Too busy with your life in the mansion and with Coriolanus, you rarely were social. You never had many friends from the capitols' elites. And those who knew were merely allies for the future. So the gossip never reached your ears.
Gossip you knew better to believe. Words change when they travel mouth to mouth. It can be easily manipulated too, your husband was a living proof of that. The snake tongue of all of Panem. But when the words seemed to get louder and louder, you couldn't help but feel maybe it's tinged with truth.
Snow was busy talking to diplomats while you were politely having a conversation with the ladies. That's when the questions began about some things they had heard about Snow. Each worse than the other but nothing you didn't already know. You make sure to change their perspective whenever something new comes up. Coriolanus was still new at this position, anything could snatch the power away if either of you weren't careful.
Feeling like you have finished the job, you begin to move away, only to stop when you hear, “...even wearing a pendant with his initial, she's nothing more than a whore who was pushed up to play the role of the First Lady. A woman of her standing would never deserve such a title.”
It was true, when Snow asked you to marry you, it was sudden and he gained nothing from it. Nothing, no money, power, and just a few connections you had but he had already impressed them all beforehand so there was no need for you. Your history in the academy wasn't all that great either, you were never the best but wholly average. A man like Snow deserved the best.
Insecurity claws at your heart and even so with recent events you knew their words were wrong. Tears burned your eyes. Your hand goes to the necklace you had on, your fingers twirling the pendant. Meanwhile, despite Coriolanus' focus being mainly on talking sweet to the guests and gathering sponsors, his eyes were on you, your every moment, and each person you spoke to. He notices you walking away from the gala and into the hallways. He followed you.
You were in one of the many bathrooms the manor had to offer. You stared at the mirror, the necklace you were wearing, and your hands traveled to the back ready to take it off. That's when Coriolanus enters the bathroom, his footsteps stopping midtrack as you freeze too.
“Coryo,” you begin to speak, your hand at your side now. “I was just-” “Why were you going to take it off?” He interrupted you, his face twisted in a glare you never thought would be directed at you. You shrugged, trying to play casual, “It doesn't feel appropriate.” “Why?” He questioned his tone icy calm, spreading chills down your spine. “Because-” because you didn't feel worthy of it. “Because you're ashamed of me,” he scoffs, walking closer to you. His eyes now fully glaring at you.
You frown, “What? Coryo, no-” He tilts your chin up, as he leans in, his expression twisted in fury, “Then what? There's no other appropriate reason for you to take it off then.” In truth, something was getting lost in translation, the women you were talking to earlier were going to be accused of treason in a few days. The cause? The rumors (some truth mixed in as well) they had spread about Snow. They were invited out of courtesy and after this, they had signed their death certificate.
“It's nothing like-” “Then what?” He hissed, “Did you finally come to your senses? Did they tell you how much of a horrible monster I am? And a horrible president?” You knew some sort of major miscommunication had happened but you had no idea how to deal with it. Not when Snow pressed a harsh, hard kiss to your lips, teeth clashing and his tongue seemingly fighting with yours for dominance that you easily gave over.
“You can't escape me, doll. No matter how horrible you realize I am. Think about running away and it's your dead body that will be leaving this mansion.” he whispered against your lips, his hands on your waist, your body flushed against his as your back hit the counter.
You chuckled at his words, knowing that would never be your end. His eyebrows furrow in confusion and it makes you giggle even further. “Dove, I am not joking,” he said, looking straight in your eyes. “I know,” you smile at him, “You…” you shake your head, smiling, you were surely crazier than him. You leaned up and pressed a soft kiss to his lips. “Those women said something… mean and it made me realize I may not be worthy of this necklace…” you begin to explain, hoping the explanation would calm him down.
You thought wrong. “You don't think I can decide who deserves to be my property, pet. Whom I let to be my queen,” he said, his tone deeper than before. He whispered, “I decided it's you. It's been a year since that decision and I haven't regretted it once.”
He manovaroued you so you were facing the mirror. He was right behind you, his eyes hard. “The woman you're looking at right now is mine. My pet. My wife. How dare you try to take off a mark of my ownership, doll?” You opened your mouth to apologize, but a moan escaped instead as he bit into your shoulder. He begins to press you against the counter, your body bending over as he continues to press wet kisses on your nape.
“You need a reminder about whom you belong to,” he whispered, his lips brushing against your skin making you shiver, heat spreading to your body as his hands unzipped your dress from behind, letting the fabric fall on the floor. “I am yours,” you moan to him as his palms knead your breasts through the bra. “Then you should have known better, my stupid bird.”
“You look away from the mirror even once…,” he said, his hands squeezing your breasts roughly, his head propped up to your shoulder, his face set in a smirk, “and that group of women dies.” They were going to die either way but you didn't know that.
You gasp, “Snow- '' His hands squeeze your breasts harder, bordering on pain. “It’s Coryo for you, dove,” he said, slowly yet firmly as if talking to a child. His hands move downwards, one moves to your hip, and for the other, his fingers slip inside your panties. You whimper when his fingertip touches your clit. At any other time, he would have been slow, and gentle when he was rubbing the bud but now? His touch was fast and unconcerned, his sole goal was to inflict punishment with pleasure.
He rubbed at your clit relentlessly, making you soak your panties with your juices. His other hand squeezes your hips. You whine, your eyes closing and he pinches your clit making you moan louder than you should, your eyes opening immediately to meet his gaze.
“Only warning, pet,” he whispered, his finger now playing with the clit even more relentlessly. Back and forth, up and down with no mercy, making the bud swollen and your pussy clench around nothing. “Yes, Coryo,” you gasp.
“My dumb pet can learn after all,” he whispered to your ear and then his lips kissed the clasp of your necklace. His fingers abandon your clit to swipe at your folds to gather your wetness. He chuckles as he continues to tease you like this, his hard cock pressing against your ass.
“Coryo,” you whispered and your eyes connected with his and you knew his fingers could feel the flex of your cunt around nothing. “That's it. Look at me, doll.”
He slipped his fingers one by one into your slit, the stretch making you gasp. “It's too much,” you managed to get out, your voice shaky. “You can take it,” he tuts. His fingers begin to message your wall, hitting every crook and canny you never knew existed. He twisted his fingers thrusting right at your g-spot making you moan loudly, your body was now completely bent over in front of the mirror and your hands gripped the counter for life. Snow continues to playfully stretch you out, scissoring your pussy with his long fingers.
When he finally deemed you loose enough, he pulled his fingers out without a warning making you whimper. He pulls down your panties around your knees, and then his hand unzipped his pant to take his cock out. Something in you liked how he was composed and fully clothed while having you like this, primal and debauched. It showcased Coriolanus perfectly, no matter how prim and proper the man was outside in the end he was as much of a mess.
His impatient was clear with his clenched jaw, one of his hands traveling upwards your body to grip your breast like a handle as his free hand guides his leaking, hard cock into your entrance. “I was going to fuck you good tonight, on a bed properly like a wife deserves,” he begins to say as he pushed in with a single stroke. Your mouth lets out a small scream as your pussy adjusts to his dick. “Instead I have to treat you like a whore, bending your ass over a counter and fuck you while there are people all over the mansion.” He shakes his head disappointed, he meets your gaze, “I expected better, doll.”
“Then why keep a disappointment around,” you snapped at him, making him raise his eyebrows at your tone, his cock twitching inside your walls. “I wonder that myself too,” he grunts, his face buried in your shoulder, his tongue licking your salty skin. “You’re my everything,” he whispered, “Don't you forget that, dove.”
It was a confession that made you turn your back and made you catch his lips. He groans into your mouth as both of your tongues play with each other, expressing words the others cannot say. His free hand went to grip your necklace chain, making you gasp as he fisted the chain and pulled at it, knocking at your breath in one go.
His hips had begun to pound into you, short, hard thrusts that made his cockhead press against your g-spot while his remaining length messaged your walls perfectly. “You don't have to think, doll. I am here to think for you. You don't have to think about deserving me, or Panem. You don't have to think at all, just be my bird. My bird only,” he grunts.
Your eyes had begun to see spots from the lack of air, he hadn't seemed to care as your pussy keeps squeezing around him because of it. He lets go of the chain, making you gasp and you take the air you desperately need as his thrusts begin to get sloppier. Coryo was too impatient, too worked up, too mad at you to care about your pleasure. You were a pet getting used and you loved every second of it.
“I love you,” you whispered to him, and he groaned in response, as his thrusts got slower. He was edging himself to last longer, for this not to end. He bites your nape, not hard as he does usually to make sure the mark fades in a few seconds. His hips continue to rock into you, both of his hands now kneading at your clothed breast. He makes your round flesh spill from the bra and cups them with a groan escaping his lips.
“You’re mine,” he said as he pressed wet kisses all over your neck and shoulders, “Mine.” Your pussy clenched around him, making his pace get even slower, frustration begins to claw your mind as your body tethers to the edge. “Yours,” you agreed. “Fuck me faster,” you plead.
He lets out a laugh, “No. You'll take what I'll give.” “Coryo, my love please!” You begged. His hips stutter, making you feel confused, before realizing why he had stopped. You hadn't called him that since that night and you realized you had leverage on the man.
“My love, please! Fuck me harder,” you spill, “Baby, please!” He clenched his jaw trying so hard not to give in to the instinct of rutting into you like an animal. Knowing that he was near the edge, you continue, “Cum in me and make me walk around the gala with your cum inside, please. Please, mark me!”
That did the trick rather perfectly. His hand wraps around your throat, not choking you but staying there as a comforting presence that shouldn't have been comforting at all. “My dumb pet has ways with words. Gotta fuck that out of you, my dove,” he smirked.
His hips begin to roll into you again, making you gasp and squeeze his dick with your slick walls. The start of it was slow and cautious before Coriolanus decided to throw it all in the wind. He takes half of his length out before slamming it back to you. The sound of hips snapping echoed into the air along with his grunts and your moans. He kept fucking into you, with no care about anything.
Both of your sights were obscene in the mirror and it turned you not to end. Your body had begun to heat, your pussy aching to cum after being played with for so long. The tension in your body was close to snapping, and he knew it too. Knew it the way your cunt kept sucking his cock in so well. His head was on your shoulder, his mouth breathing out hot air onto your skin.
“Look at me,” you whispered, and his eyes snap at you and not even a second later he spills into your cunt, fucking his cum into you as he lets out a whine for the first time. You gasp, feeling your build-up fading without snapping but Snow was never to disappoint. He pulled his cock out, just to stuff you with his fingers. You whimper, your sensitive walls twitching around his fingers, so close to breaking.
Coriolanus doesn't waste a second to thrust into your sopping cunt, your folds covered in his cum, and fucking that into you with his fingers. He crooks his fingers perfectly, hitting your g-spot and making you black out for a second as his fingers keep assaulting your insides without a care.
You gasp, your body starting to give up. Snow has to wrap an arm around you to help you stay balanced. “That's it, doll. Cum on my fingers. I will make you cum on my cock later,” he promised to you. You cry out as his fingers continue their fast pace of thrusting. And finally, finally, your orgasm builds up again. A single graze from his fingertip onto your spongy spot has you not only cumming but squirting too.
Even Coriolanus eyes widen in surprise as you spill your juices onto the floor, ruining your dress and everything. You begin to feel ashamed of losing control in such a manner, but Coryo curses, “Fuck, doll. Fuck, that was…” He couldn't even finish the sentence.
You close your eyes, feeling yourself close to losing balance, only for Snow to swipe your legs from the floor and carry you to the bathtub.
“I’ll take care of you, doll,” he said, “I’ll bring in a new set of clothes, wait.” “What about the gala?” You asked. He kissed your temple before he replied, “I told everyone to leave the moment you walked away. Told everyone you were sick and as your husband, I shall be taking care of you.”
You let out a raspy chuckle, it was rather amazing how Coriolanus Snow always turned everything in his favor. Even this would help his image of being a president who took such good care of his wife and would surely take the country to great lengths.
“Snow lands on top,” you whispered to him with a smile.
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Current tag list: @stelleduarte @nowitsmissing @lifeonawhim @le-lena @dollfacedalls @motley-baby @champomiel @slytherinholland @randomstuff2040 @justacaliforniandreamer @emmalinemalfoy @hyuk4s @theamuz @watercolorskyy
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atrirose · 2 months
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𐙚 TWIRL FOR ME DARLING ! p.jay
bf!jay x f!reader warning. none + fluff 🎀 wc.307 m.list 🐰 seiu?!: got me giggling and kicking feet , just a little something since i am not that actively writing rn 🤭🫶🏻
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“is this your package?” jay said as he walked in with your package of new skirts and shirts you ordered using his card, “yeah and i used your card if it’s alright with you”
“asking if i am okay after using wow?” you turned towards jay watching his reaction, he never really had a problem when you used his card but it was in your opinion now quite rude not to inform him “jay im sorry, i should have asked babe” he looked away from your package he has been staring to you “oh? no it’s alright but i think it’s only fair i see what you bought with my card” he looked at you with a smirk “yeah sure let’s open it together”
“ah ah no not that way” you looked at him confused, “i want you to do a little fashion show for me princess, wear those cute clothes and show me just how pretty you are” he said as he kissed your forehead “oh yeah sure”
you quickly went in the bathroom to change into the new skirt you ordered “tada don’t i look like bella hadid” you said walking in as jay eyed you “you a little too short to be bella but you are still pretty baby” he said as he held your hands “do you want me to twirl for you” you said twinkled eye, your skirt for pretty and you had to show it off “yeah that would be good, twirl for me doll” as you tried to twirl he caught your hand and pulled you, making u land on his lap. “yn you are so beautiful” he said as he buried his face in your neck “and you are very pretty too jay” you said stroking his hair, he hummed as he kissed your neck.
“let’s get married”
“JAY?”
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i99zhuo · 1 month
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A routine inspired by thewizardliz ? She has skin care hair care routine reads motivating books
How to live like thewizardliz 🧚🏼‍♀️🪄⁺˚⋆。°✩₊ quit your lazy girl era!
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This is a guide on daily routines inspired by Thewizardliz! This routine is perfect to stop being lazy and pathetic and finally start taking care of yourself!
content list (routines):
morning
study
workout
shower + self care
night
(_ _ ) . . z Z⋆ ˚。⋆୨୧˚୨ :★: ୧ ∗  ˖࣪ ໒꒱  ˚₊·
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✸ ꒰ morning routine ꒱⋆ ࣪.* ࣪.⋆
🧼 First things first, after you wake up make sure to drink water to boost your metabolism throughout the day! Also, create a mind movie so you can watch it everyday after you wake up.
Now, take your journal and start writing about your dream, ideal higher self, ask yourself questions like ‘What reality do i want to create?´ 'Who do i look up to?’ ‘What is the behavior I need to change about myself?’ ‘What's a new habit that I would like to create?’ ‘What is a thing I can focus on right now?’. After we have in mind who we want to become, it's important that every little decision you make today is centered to achieve your goals, and become your dream self. You can listen to a podcast while doing this so you get motivation!
💶 Then, head to the bathroom and look at yourself in the mirror and start repeating positive affirmations, such as ‘I am so beautiful’ or ‘My hair looks so pretty today’, even if you don't believe it, having a positive mindset is going to help us to stay in track with our goals!
Take care of your teeth, Liz says that our smile is one of the most important things in a person, and one of the key things that is going to make you more attractive! so, make sure to brush your teeth, floss, clean your tongue, etc.
🛣 Liz has a rather simple skincare routine, since her skin is so sensitive, it only consists of using a foam cleanser, moisturizer and eye cream to help with her eye bags.
Next step is to research and find our own personal clothing and makeup style, find out your body type, personal color, face shape, etc. It doesn't matter if you have to mix multiple styles that already exist to make your own! The most important thing is to feel comfortable while wearing those clothes or having that type of makeup on your face.
🏔 Liz doesn't like to force herself to have breakfast, she just dont eat if she's not hungry, however if you are hungry rather than focusing on calories focus on how nutritious your meal is. Whatsoever if you are not hungry and you are not going to eat, make sure to always take your vitamins and supplements!
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✸ ꒰ study routine ꒱⋆ ࣪.* ࣪.⋆
Yes, it's time to drink a little more water!
⛰ Liz doesn't have a settled study routine but, it's important to spend our time wisely, if you can finish an assignment way before the time it's due, DO IT! Also, she emphasized that knowledge leads to confidence. If you put effort in your studies, every little thing in your life will slowly fall into place.
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✸ ꒰ workout routine ꒱⋆ ࣪.* ࣪.⋆
First, set healthy goals, like toning up your body or building muscle, try not to make ‘just being skinny’ your goal.
🧩 second, don't measure yourself with a scale or measuring tape and focus on how you look in the mirror, are you satisfied? if you are then you are done with the intense workout routine!
Liz goes to the gym and has her own personal training program, but here’s some kind of exercises she recommends; weight training, pilates and dancing with her main focus being toning up her abs and butt.
🏄‍♀️ Remember to drink water and that consistency is more important than perfection, go at your own pace, it doesn't matter if you can't do a 2 hour workout and look snatched in 3 days and you can only do a 5 minute workout, every little effort adds up!
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✸ ꒰ shower and self care routine ꒱⋆ ࣪.* ࣪.⋆
Before showering, do dry brushing to exfoliate your skin and increase circulation (1-2 times per week). Then use shampoo and conditioner, research to find the best one for you, what may help others won't help you. Liz also uses a hair mask 1 to 2 times per week to get that shiny silk hair.
🎾 After showering take some time to shape and pluck your eyebrows depending on your face shape and what impression you want to give! 
Liz uses face masks 1 to 2 times per week to cleansing her face deeply, then she does her skincare. After applying all the products do a lymphatic massage on your face and neck, you can also cool down your face with massagers or cold spoons for an extra depuff.
🍾 For self care, you can journal again, search for shadow work prompts, think of what things you should unlearn and relearn and don't forget to practice gratitude. Or you can take time to clean your room or house, you deserve to have a clean safe place! 
Oh! and don't forget to drink water again.
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✸ ꒰ night routine ꒱⋆ ࣪.* ࣪.⋆
🧃 Time for dinner! (only if you are not full yet), again, make sure to focus on nutrients rather than calories. Don't forget to drink a glass of water with your dinner. You can watch a documentary while eating to keep gaining even more knowledge.
Now, do your oral hygiene routine again. Also, put on eyelash conditioner and serum to wake up with perfect lashes! Then wear a silk cap or do a protective hairstyle to protect your hair from getting damaged while you're sleeping.
🍵 Then get in bed and drink a cup of tea with collagen to start relaxing your body. and it's finally time to manifest! watch your mind movie again and use your most useful method (affirming visualizing, subliminals, etc.), don't forget to ask god, the universe or whatever you believe in for signals and help!
Afterwards, you can read an inspirational book like ‘atomic habits’ or ‘the art of thinking clearly’ to keep nourishing your brain. keep a reachable goal like reading 5 pages everyday and then decide if you want to continue reading or not.
🥬 Before sleeping listen to a guided meditation, liz have one to be more confident and one to attract money, choose one that aligns with your goals!
Finally fall asleep in a healthy sleeping position, Liz sleeps in her back looking at the roof, but you can choose your favorite position, don't forget to get a pillow that fits the position (example: tall and lofty pillow -> for sleeping on your side)
🍈 Good night!
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Woah second request done!! hope you liked this one was pretty fun to do and I might add some of these things in my own personal routine so I don't fall back into laziness, anyways how about you guys??
toodlezzzz!1!!!!!
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