#and I do love my job I know it may seem weird but it’s a good fucking job

[thatbadadvice]

Help! I'm a Perfect Genius, but This Potential Employer Asked Me a Boring Interview Question!

Ask A Manager, 13 Feb 2024:

I was rejected from a role for not answering an interview question. I had all the skills they asked for, and the recruiter and hiring manager loved me. I had a final round of interviews — a peer on the hiring team, a peer from another team that I would work closely with, the director of both teams (so my would-be grandboss, which I thought was weird), and then finally a technical test with the hiring manager I had already spoken to. (I don’t know if it matters but I’m male and everyone I interviewed with was female.) The interviews went great, except the grandboss. I asked why she was interviewing me since it was a technical position and she was clearly some kind of middle manager. She told me she had a technical background (although she had been in management 10 years so it’s not like her experience was even relevant), but that she was interviewing for things like communication, ability to prioritize, and soft skills. I still thought it was weird to interview with my boss’s boss. She asked pretty standard (and boring) questions, which I aced. But then she asked me to tell her about the biggest mistake I’ve made in my career and how I handled it. I told her I’m a professional and I don’t make mistakes, and she argued with me! She said everyone makes mistakes, but what matters is how you handle them and prevent the same mistake from happening in the future. I told her maybe she made mistakes as a developer but since I actually went to school for it, I didn’t have that problem. She seemed fine with it and we moved on with the interview. A couple days later, the recruiter emailed me to say they had decided to go with someone else. I asked for feedback on why I wasn’t chosen and she said there were other candidates who were stronger. I wrote back and asked if the grandboss had been the reason I didn’t get the job, and she just told me again that the hiring panel made the decision to hire someone else. I looked the grandboss up on LinkedIn after the rejection and she was a developer at two industry leaders and then an executive at a third. She was also connected to a number of well-known C-level people in our city and industry. I’m thinking of mailing her on LinkedIn to explain why her question was wrong and asking if she’ll consider me for future positions at her company but my wife says it’s a bad idea. What do you think about me mailing her to try to explain?

Sir,

You have been wronged in the most grievous of ways by a coven of retaliatory, self-aggrandizing women who have failed in the extreme to recognize your brilliance, your talent, and above all, your general superiority.

Of course you should mail this mediocre "grandboss" on LinkedIn to inform her of the deep offense she caused you by interviewing you in the first place, let alone doing so using a boring question — indeed, you have a moral and professional obligation to do so in order to preserve your honor and the honor of scores of men like you who have never done a single solitary thing wrong in their lives, ever.

But I beg you to consider doing more. A single, private message to one incompetent bitch may not convey to the necessary parties the depth and breadth of the situation. Many, many people have important lessons to learn from your experience, and I encourage you to share it widely. Consider making a public LinkedIn post, and ensure that it is shareable across platforms. Depending on your financial resources, a billboard with your name, professional headshot, and contact information could go a long way toward ensuring that everyone in your industry who needs to know just how you handled the way these women treated you, does know about it. I hope that in your continuing job search, you are able to connect with potential employers who have a much better grasp of all you bring to the table.

#advice #bad advice #ask a manager #workplace #workplace advice #linkedin #bosses #working #developers #coding #fedoras #men #misogyny #workplace misogyny #hiring #job searching #employment

[queen-of-fanfics]

Stay Away From Him

Pairing: Miguel O'Hara x Reader

Prompt: Miguel is jealous of your closeness with Hobie and tells you to stay from him.

A/N: Well I have had too much free time at work and all I've been doing is writing. Kinda love it. Also, how did y'all like Across the Spider-Verse? I saw it four times in theaters, it's like a drug in my veins. Anywho I figured I wanted to do a fanfic in a world that I haven't done yet so here it is!

Part 2

“Hey, Y/N.”

“Hey, Peter!”

“Hey, Y/N”

“Oh hey, Peters.”

“Oi! Y/N!” Recognizing the accent, you look up in the air and see Hobie swinging his way over to you.

“Hobie! What are you doing here?!”

This was your second week working inside the Spider-Verse headquarters. You were the only person there who wasn’t some version of Spiderman. One day, Miguel O’Hara was in your universe for a job, bing bang boom, next thing you knew, he offered you a job. Your job here at headquarters was to act as his assistant of sorts. Help him with errands, help him on missions, and fetch him lunch because the poor man will work until he starves. That was exactly what you are doing now. You had finished locating the latest anomaly and went down to the cafeteria to grab him some empanadas.

Working at headquarters was like a living dream. So far, everyone seems to like you and you’ve already made friends. Hobie and Gwen welcomed you with open arms and the three of you became inseparable. During your time working with Miguel, you may have developed a little crush on your boss. You never told anyone about how your heart starts beating faster or how your breath gets shaky when he stands a little too close. Though, you never had to say because everyone could see it. And everyone warned you away from the infamous Miguel O’Hara.

“He’s not for you. He’s obsessed with his work and barely knows what having fun or being nice is. I doubt he even knows there’s a life outside of this place.” Gwen said one day during lunch.

“Who’s not for me? What are you talking about? I’m just here to work.” You shovel food into your mouth in an attempt to hide your face.

“Mmhmm, sure. You can deny it all you want but if you keep staring at him all weird like that, even he’s going to start to notice. Just trust me, you should just try to stay away from him. Which I guess isn’t possible since he’s your boss but you know what I mean.” 

“Though it does raise the question as to why he recruited her, don’t it?” Hobie chimes in. 

Hobie jumps on your back and it pulls you back to the present.

“I’m here for it! Whatchu think? I would willingly come here? Nah.”

“Actually! We just finished a mission so we just came to check in with Miguel.” Gwen swings down and lands right next to you. The three of you continue walking side by side down the hall to Miguel. Hobie throws his arm casually around your shoulder, keeping you close to his side.

You walk into the main room and see that Miguel is standing on his platform up in the air. There are a few people milling around the room, minding their business. People tend to hover around Miguel in case any missions come up or if he needs help.

“Miguel! I got you some empanadas!” You yell up at him.

He turns and barely glances over his shoulder at the three of you. He grunts and rolls his eyes in annoyance but his platform starts its slow descent. Gwen runs over to Jessica and they start talking. Hobie walks with you over to your little desk that sits on the ground floor …. like a regular person.

“So we still on for tonight?” Hobie asks.

“What’s tonight?” You turn and ask Hobie. You lean your butt against the desk to look up at him. He gets in close, places his hands against the desk on both sides of you, and cages you in with his arms.

“Whatchu mean what’s tonight? Did you forget already? Thought you and Gwen were staying in my place tonight!” Hobie teases you.

“Oh, Hobie! I forgot about that, I can’t come over.” Gwen yells over before she turns back to her conversation.

“Guess it’s just us then.” He mumbles and gives you a wink.

Before you could respond, Miguel’s voice booms through the large chamber.

“Y/N isn’t going anywhere tonight.” Looking over, you see that Miguel has lowered his platform as far as it could go and he is staring directly at the two of you with a deadly look on his face. All the conversations in the room died down and you could tell that everyone's eyes were looking between you and Miguel. Everyone treads carefully around Miguel … everyone except Hobie. 

“What? You keeping her hostage now?”

All of a sudden feeling nervous, unsure as to what put Miguel in a foul mood and not wanting to make it worse, you try to straighten up and stand in attention but Hobie isn’t moving. 

“We’ve got work to do here, Hobie. Unlike you, some of us have things we have to do.” Miguel crosses his arms and stares down at Hobie. 

“What work? We caught all the known anomalies already. Plus I was going to work on my bike, give it some more bells and whistles.” Jessica pipes up.

“There’s more work to do than just waiting around for things to happen.” 

“Then what do I gotta do, hmm?” Jessica sasses back to him.

“Nothing. I, uh, just want to do some surveillance. Never know ”

“And what Y/N got to do with it, then?” Hobie asks, giving Miguel a weird look.

“Y/N is my assistant. Y/N must assist me. And get off of her Hobie.”

“Right, but it don’t sound like there is any real work to do. I don’t see why Y/N gotta sit here and suffer being around you. And, uh, I’m actually quite comfortable where I am.”

“No no, I don’t mind. It’s my job. I can stay” You rush to say as you start pushing at Hobie’s shoulders. 

Hobie turned slowly to look at you without budging and you just stared up at him. “Move.” you mouth to Hobie with beseechment in your eyes. But all he does is smile at you and barely visibly shakes his head ‘No’. Eyes wide, you think to yourself, I’m not going to have a job after this. The room is still silent and no one speaks as the tension rises. 

“Everyone out!” Miguel booms, “Looks like no one wants to work anyways. It’s not as if we’re trying to save the entire universe or anything.” 

“Oh! Miguel, we wanted to check in about the-” Gwen is cut off when Miguel turns back around to his monitors and yells, “OUT!”

Everyone exchanges nervous looks around the room while they pick up their things. The whole time though, Hobie is looking down at you with a knowing smirk on his face. “What are you smiling about?” You hiss at him as you push him up so you can grab your bag and head out. 

“Oh just something I think you should find out for yourself. And you might soon.”

“Ugh, I’m going to kill you.” 

Hobie throws his arm around you and leads you out, “Yeah sure, but hey, looks like you can come over after all, aye?”

“Everyone except for Y/N!” You whirl around at the sudden sound but Miguel is still just looking at his monitors.

“Damn, looks like you’re going to find out real soon. See ya sweet cheeks.” Hobie gives you a wink and walks out with everyone else. 

You stood in the doorway waiting for Miguel’s instructions but after a few beats, you realized that he wasn’t going to turn around and talk to you. Slowly walking back to your desk, you couldn’t help but notice how the tension in the room did not leave along with everyone else. It still lay thick and heavy in the air. Taking off your bag and placing it on your desk, you turn around to face Miguel. You open your mouth to say something to break the silence but he cuts you off. 

“Come up here and help me look at this.” 

Your eyes grew wide and you hurried over to the dais. Your heartbeat started quickening with excitement, you have never been invited onto the platform before. Miguel looks down his nose at you with a disgusted look on his face as you struggle to even get your leg on the platform.

“Sorry, don’t got webs like y’all. Give me a second.”

You finally heave yourself up and flop over on your back, gulping down deep breaths of air. “You know, I’m starting to think I’m out of shape.” Figuring that it was time to actually get to work, you jump up to your feet and face the monitors.

“Alrighty, so what am I looking at?” All of the monitors were showing different videos of different universes. Some other monitors had new articles and alerts of potential disturbances. 

“Just, uh, keep an eye on some of the security cameras we have posted around. See if you catch any suspicious activity.”

“Were you expecting something to happen tonight? Did you get a tip?”

“No, just doing our due diligence to keep everything in line.” 

Your brows furrowed in confusion and you gave Miguel a side-eye look. This is what he’s keeping me here to do? To watch some cameras? 

The whole time he was talking to you and giving you instructions, he did not glance at you, just busily pressing buttons and typing something.

About 10 minutes went by in absolute silence with Miguel working and you … “working”. Getting bored and tired on your feet, you start leaning around the table and let out a sigh. Miguel looks at you over his shoulder but turns back to his work. Another 10 minutes go by before he asks, “So you and Hobie are friends?”

Surprised by the question and surprised he even spoke, you responded, “Yeah, I would like to think so. He’s nice, I like hanging out with him.”

“You two have gotten close?”

Getting confused by his line of questioning, you give him a weird look that he doesn’t see. “I mean, I don’t know about close. We hang out with Gwen too. It’s usually the three of us.”

A few silent beats fall between the two of you before he responds, “I didn’t know you were visiting different universes.”

“Hmm, I’m not really. Besides my own home universe, I’ve only just been to Hobie’s. I haven’t seen Gwen’s though not even she goes back there.” 

Again he doesn’t reply immediately and the comfortable silence continues. 

“I would advise you to stay away from Hobie. He could be a bad influence on you or something.” He mumbles so quietly that you almost didn’t catch it. 

“I’m sorry?” You asked, turning your body full to look at him now. 

“I said ‘you should stay’-”

“No, I know what you said. But I don’t understand why. What’s going on with you? Are you stressed about something? Do you not like Hobie? Because Hobie has been nothing but nice to me and he’s a friend. He keeps me safe even when I visit his universe.”

“And exactly how many times have you visited his universe, hmm? You two seem pretty comfortable flying across universes together.” It was his turn to turn and face you. Standing at his full height, the tops of your head barely came up to his collar bones. 

“I-I- … I don’t know. A few times I guess? 4? Maybe 5 times? But-”

“5 times?! You met him not even two weeks ago and you’ve already been hanging around him that much?” You were trying to explain to ease whatever caused his temper to rise. However, with every response you give, it only seems to anger him more. With every response, he is taking a step closer to you and walking you backward.

“I guess? But he’s my friend! And I’ve always been safe if that’s the issue. He keeps me safe. I know I’m not a Spider-Man like you but-” Miguel ignores your argument and cuts you off again.

“Right right and he keeps you safe which I am sure he is more than happy to do seeing as how he’s always getting up in your space. And what exactly do you do in his universe? You run around town like some hooligans and go back to your home universe when it’s late enough to be considered morning?”

“Ah- No, we hang out at his place and have dinner and stuff, I don’t know! And when it gets late I just stay over at his place!” 

“Stay over?! What? Like overnight? He’s got guest rooms now? He’s hosting house parties?” There’s sarcasm dripping in his words but your brain was running too fast to notice.

“N-No he doesn’t. He’s not. He just lets me use his bed when I’m too tired to go home and I’d just wake up the next morning to come here.” 

All of a sudden, he takes one last step forward and you take one step back but your backside hits the table. He drops his hands on either side of you, exactly like how Hobie had you pinned against your desk earlier but this is different. This feels different. The tension is palpable. With Hobie, it was friendly and playful. With Miguel … it feels like you’re getting hunted and just got caught.

“He what?” Miguel’s voice isn’t loud and angry anymore. No. It’s low and deadly. His question comes out always like a whisper as he leads in so close that your noses are practically touching.

“I don’t understand what’s happening. Hobie is just my friend. Why does this feel like it’s a problem?” You whisper. Miguel doesn’t reply. He simply stares at you with such intensity in his eyes, you’re surprised you didn’t evaporate. Suddenly, he’s looking at your lips. Acting almost instinctively, your tongue shoots out to wet your lips and his eyes immediately shoot back up to yours. There’s the intensity in his eyes again, only this time, it’s different. Definitely not anger.

Suddenly, an alarm from Miguel’s monitor goes off and the sound is thunderous in the silent chamber. 

After a few beats, Miguel drops his forehead on yours, closes his eyes, and takes a deep breath. The whole time, you never take your eyes off of him. Your heart is beating so fast and the blood is rushing in your ears. Very abruptly, he pushes off of the table and whirls around to the monitor. He turns off the alarm and starts typing away, completely ignoring you. Slowly pushing up from the table, you turn back to your own monitor and stare blankly at the empty alleyways and random buildings. 

Where there was comfortable silence before, now, the silence is deafening. 

“You should go home Y/N. I can finish this up on my own.”

Not sure of how to act or how to respond, you slowly climb down from the platform without saying a word and fetch your things.

“And I mean home, Y/N. To your home universe. To your own house. To your own bed.”

Looking back up the dais, Miguel is still facing his monitors, not even looking at you when he talks. Hitching your bag higher up on your shoulder, you respond, “Of course. Goodnight, Miguel. And … for what it’s worth … he always slept on the couch.” 

And with that, you take off running down the hall and teleport back home. 

#fanfiction #fanfic #spiderman imagine #spiderman fanfiction #spiderman fanfic #spiderman #spider man #across the spiderverse #miguel o'hara #miguel o'hara imagine #miguel o'hara x reader #miguel o'hara x y/n #miguel o'hara one shot #hobie #hobie brown #spider punk #spiderman x reader #spider man 2099

[fuckyeahgoodomens]

Neil talking about the responses to Good Omens Season 2 - from the Neil Gaiman interview with Brian Levine for The Gould Standard (x,x)

BL: The audience that you have built is a very passionately engaged audience. They, frankly, they love you. And one of the reasons they love you is that you fit into what I think of as one of two great divisions in art. There's, or in writing, um, there is: I'm entertained, I'm amused. I may be even enchanted; and then there's this hits me at a visceral level. You understand me as no one else does. You have touched something very central to my experience. And it seems to me that Much of your writing, maybe all of your writing, actually reaches your audience at that latter level. You know. I would say in the former category, sort of my quintessential and beloved example would be P. G. Woodhouse. He amuses me, but I don't feel like he's revealed my inner self at a very deep level. Um, were you aware that you were going to be able to achieve that? Um, that this is something... was it a startling thing when people began coming up to you, who'd read your work and said, this means so much to me?

Neil: Yeah. It was huge. And it wasn't expected. I... if I had a mountaintop I was heading towards, it was gonna be P. G. Woodhouse. Um, I wanted to be a proficient entertainer with a clear prose style who could tell stories. Um, it probably wasn't until Sandman that I found... I started to realize that in order for a story to work, I had to show too much. In order for a story to resonate, in order for a story to matter, I had to let it matter too much. And, and I remember the first people who would start coming up to me and saying, um, you, you know, your, your Sandman comics got me through the death of a loved one. Your death character got me through my child's death, through my parent's death, through my partner's death, through my friend's death. Um, and that left me kind of amazed. I'm like, well, I didn't write it to do that. I wrote it to feed my children. I wrote it to satisfy myself. I wrote it because nobody else had ever written it. And if I didn't write it, it wouldn't be written, but I don't think I wrote it to give you what you've taken from it. And I spent really about 20, 25 years feeling awkward about that. And then my father died, in March 2009, and never got to cry about it. Never... I, you know, I've, I've got on a plane and I went to the UK and dealt with the funeral stuff and organized all of that stuff and came back and go toff the plane and went and did Stephen Colbert's Colbert Report and wearing the funeral suit because and that was all I had with me and carried on. And then, somewhere in the middle of summer, I was reading a friend's script. They'd sent me a script and said, can you look this over? And I'm reading it, and on page 20, the lead character meets somebody, and on page 26 maybe, she's dead, and I burst into tears. And I'm bawling. I am sobbing. It is coming out of me in giant racking waves. And I realized that it's everything that I'd been, hadn't let myself feel, or hadn't been able, hadn't stopped enough to let myself feel, was suddenly being given permission to feel by the death of a fictional person who I'd met six pages earlier, ia script. And I thought that... and it was huge for me, and I thought, okay, that's that thing that people are talking about sometimes, when they come tome and they say, you, you did this. So right now, I'm in this weird, wonderful place where I think a lot of people in Good Omens Season 2 thought they were signing up for the P.G. Woodhouse, and didn't know that, no, no, no, you've, you've signed up for the whole thing. You've signed up for the feelings. You've signed up for the emotions. I... it is my job to make you care and to make you feel and to feel things you haven't felt before. And which meant that the first week or so after Good Omens came out, I was getting angry, furious, deeply upset messages on every possible social medium telling me that I had betrayed people, and it was awful, and they couldn't stop crying, and why would I do that to them, and did I hate them? And they hated me. And then a weird sort of phenomenon happened as people would watch the show again. And again. And now they started to know, okay, this is where it's gonna go, this is what's gonna happen, this is how it works. And they started realizing that they were actually feeling things, and that was good. And that they were caring about two people who don't exist. You know, I made them up, and then and Terry Pratchett made them up, and then, um, David Tennant and Michael Sheen gave them life, and then they get to walk around on a screen and you know they don't exist, but you can cry for them, you can love them, they can make you laugh, they can make you exult, and most important of all, they can make you care. And the number of people who are now writing to me, saying, 'This was so important to me. This has changed my life. This makes me feel like I belong. This makes me feel like I can cope. And it's let me sort of find myself. P. S. I hope you get to do Season Three.' is, is huge.

#good omens #neil gaiman #brian levine #neil the gould standard 2023 #interview #neil interview #videos #fun fact #gos2 #season 2 #2ep6 #s2 interview

[flanaganfilm]

Do you have any “don’t meet your heroes” stories from working in Hollywood?

Absolutely. Hollywood really is a place like no other. If you grow up loving cinema, certain people can take on mythic status in your imagination. Actors, filmmakers; they are larger than life. They become idols in the truest sense - an image that is actually worshipped. But Hollywood is actually full of very weird human beings who have been lucky enough to make their living in a world of make-believe. A huge percentage of the people who work in this industry are strange birds, unsuited for working anywhere else.

Some of our biggest stars wouldn't last ten minutes working a real job; some of our most exalted filmmakers collapse inward if they're in a crowded room. They can have unusual talents, or beauty, or unique perspectives and abilities that have propelled them to various levels of success, or even stardom, but they're just normal, neurotic people.

And success, fame, and money can really twist people. It can be like radiation. They can go full Gollum from it.

But most people who work in Hollywood are not stars at all. The vast majority of people who work here are not rich, not famous. Most are hardworking craftsmen and craftswomen who are fighting every day to make a living, scraping by the best they can in an industry that is brutal, impersonal, and impenetrable. But every single person in this business - whether they are superstars or not - are just ordinary people. They're insecure, anxious, and prone to all of the failings we mortals are prone to. Some of them are awesome; some of them are assholes. But most of the people here (even the superstars) quietly feel like they don't belong, or that they don't deserve it, or that their sheer ordinariness will be discovered any minute. In fact, it's the people who seem to feel the opposite - those rare people who feel that they DO belong here, and deserve the lifestyle this industry can afford, who are inevitably the least likable ones I've met.

As I've been lucky enough to keep working in this business, I've met a lot of the people who I idolized along the way. Filmmakers and actors who I admire so much, whose work has shaped the trajectory of my life without them knowing it. I've been starstruck every time, and I am still am - I stammer, I freeze, and I kick myself for what I say, or don't say, or how I said it. I'm not good at it. I have acute social anxiety, and when you throw me at someone I admire, I turn into a blubbering idiot. They say "don't meet your heroes" because you may (likely will) be disappointed by just how ordinary they truly are. Or worse, they may even turn out to be people you wouldn't want to interact with in normal circumstances - your heroes might be people you wouldn't want to invite to coffee. The persona you have admired is a product in itself, something you bought, something you have taken home and displayed proudly in your imagination... but the human being behind that persona is full of all the ordinary failings. That can be really hard to reconcile. So yeah, a long-winded way of saying that I've had the experience of meeting people I admired a great deal only to be disappointed, or worse. I've got some nightmare stories in there where the actual person violently shattered the idol I'd built in my imagination. I won't share those stories, there's little point in that, but instead I'll talk about the rare exceptions - the few heroes I've met who were every bit as awesome as I'd hoped they'd be. They may say "never meet your heroes," but they haven't met Mark Hamill. I worked with Mark on The Fall of the House of Usher, and he is one of my favorite people. Kind, generous, humble, and so, so funny. I was nervous and excited to meet Mark for the obvious reasons, because of the hero he was in my imagination - but I got to meet Mark the actor, the father, the husband, the humanitarian, and the friend. Guillermo Del Toro - one of my biggest heroes, his work has meant so much to me. And I was terrified to meet him. But he is one of the most joyful, honest, sweet-natured people I've met in the business, and his love for movies is infectious. For me, the man himself exceeded the myth.

I've been lucky to meet other exceptions to this rule, heroes of mine who exceeded my expectations - Ewan McGregor, Mick Garris, Brian Henson, Heather Langenkamp, Henry Thomas - and yeah, I've had the other experience too. But I try to focus on the exceptions. It can be unhealthy to idolize people - unhealthy for you, and unhealthy for them. But it's truly awesome when someone is even more amazing than you imagined.

#never meet your heroes most of the time #except Mark Hamill

[rucksackmentality]

List of the truths shared in Nana Morri's Honesty trial (C3E79):

Imogen: I am genuinely scared to meet my mom again.

Laudna: Deep down inside, both Delilah and I want the shard...Fearne should have it, but I don't know anymore what's my opinion or desires or feelings, or hers.

Imogen: I love Laudna deeply but I'm disgusted at the thought of Delilah looking at us all the time.

Orym: I'm super lonely all the time, especially at night. It doesn’t matter if I'm bunking with one of you guys.

FCG: Sometimes I pity some of you because you have beating hearts and opportunities and you don’t do enough with them...Chetney, you have so much love to give and it doesn't seem like you're interested in anything other than wood! There's people out there who you could love and experiences you could share with someone else, but all you care about is wood!

Orym: I've always kind of laughed it off but I guess I do kind of wonder if Chetney is my dad.

Ashton: I am the reason that the Jiana Hexum robbery went fucking wrong, and the reason why I got thrown out of a fucking window.

Fearne: I feel like we’re very ill-equipped for this job and we're going to fail at saving the world. (Laudna: Honestly that's probably true, I'm right there with you.)

Chetney: While wood may be the superior material to metal, I do fear that, with the dwindling interest in it, that children will find my toys - and thereby myself - obsolete every year I grow older.

FCG: I think it's something buried deep down in my circuitry, but every time I hurt or kill something - it feels really good. It makes me sort of relax a little bit and some of my stress goes away.

Imogen: I know we're supposed to save the gods, but I've tried talking to them my whole life and none of them would ever respond. I think I'm tainted. I dont know if I want to save gods that don't love me.

Laudna: You know we could rip-cord out of [saving the world] at any moment...right? And sometimes I fantasize about it all the time.

Fearne: I sometimes do stuff to you guys while you're sleeping - not weird stuff, I just like to look at you closely...and maybe like, twiddle your hair or braid it. Nothing bad!

Ashton: Whenever it starts to get quiet, I start worrying that one of us - most of us - are going to end up killing another one of us accidentally...I have panicked thinking about when one you kills another one of us.

Orym: I have all the faith in the world in you guys...and I have also spent time thinking of how to neutralize each of you.

FCG: I kinda worry that I put all my eggs in the Changebringer basket and she might betray us all. I had a really weird conversation with her and I think she's just out for herself and she might not really care about me - but what if she does? And I'm saying horrible things?

Imogen: Fearne, I was really disappointed in you for running away from your power. You should take the shard!

Orym: I really miss Dorian, and sometimes I think that's okay, and sometimes I think it isn't.

Ashton: I feel fucking worse that I just fucked up Fearne's life way more than mine and I should've died instead of that happening.

Chetney: I grew up in the Bramblewood outside of Westruun, and when I was a kid, I came back from learning how to make toys and found that my whole family had left. All they left behind were toys. They ran when Errevon the Rimelord was running across the plains, and so I'm kind of afraid of dragons. And I had five siblings - Alabaster, Pepper, Sugarplum, Hermey, and Chad - and I was so mad that they left I never looked for any of them, and now I'm pretty sure they're dead. So I think any family I have is just gonna look for a reason to leave me. That's why I don't get attached to anybody.

#critical role #cr spoilers #c3e79 #cr3

[inklessletter]

Autumn of 86. Robin is working at the most boring record store of all Hawkins to save up for escaping that hellhole where she lives in, where the weirdest shit happens all the time (kids coming back to life, classmates killed by chemical leaks, another gas leak that makes the mall blow up, a murderer from Pennhurst breaking free and going in a teenager killing spree, rumours of satanic cults...). Thank god she is working there with his best friend Eddie "love at first sight is an illusion" Munson, who makes her days less painful, and who, right now, is flirting with this all beaten up guy she has never seen before.

She wants to interrupt them, but the way they are talking it is so unlike Eddie. Staring, mildly blushing, soft voices and the strangest interaction going on there when he is purchasing the first cassette he grabs and he is not even paying attention to what he is buying because this new guy can't take his eyes off of Eddie. It even takes him a while to reply to Eddie when he asks him if he wants anything else.

Robin could swear that guy wanted to say something different from his actual answer. "No. No, yeah, that's–that's all. Thanks."

And Eddie half smiles, looks down. "Yeah. Great, here is your change, man. Enjoy your Christmas Carol tape."

"What? Oh, yeah. I will. I guess," and the guy smiles, and it looks painful because his lip is split. He bites his bottom lip and looks away. "See you around."

"Yeah. See you around."

And they—they just stare.

It takes him a few seconds before he purses his lips, nods, and leaves the establishment. And what has Robin standing there, and not bashing at Eddie the second that guy closes the door after him is the fact that she could swear that this guy was... was about to cry.

And Robin is a lot of things, but above all she is curious.

And smart.

And she is stubborn enough to find her answers.

She indeed teases Eddie about him gaping at the guy like a mad man. And she expects pushback, she really does. Eddie always gives her some resistance of her teasing but when Eddie says "I don't know, Robs, I feel like I have seen him before," she believes him.

So Robin does what she does best and finds the guy.

She follows him for a while, and thinks she is doing a great job at the grocery store, following him from the end of the aisle, but she loses him for a second and runs to find him again. She runs into him him as soon as she turns the aisle, face to face.

"Sorry, hi," he says.

"Hi," Robin parrots.

And they stare at each other.

Robin is good reading people. She always has been. And she doesn't really know what she is seeing in this guy's eyes but whatever it is is warm. And familiar.

"Are you okay?" he asks. And she is a bit lost in her own thoughts to reply right away. It takes her ten seconds to realize that he was asking because they actually crashed against each other. They were so close. He was holding her by the elbows.

She immediately steps back.

"Yeah, sorry. I am so clumsy sometimes, my coordination is not what you may say, sharp," she explains rapidly and awkwardly.

And the guy smiles, and it is the kind of smile that reaches the eyes. And she smiles too.

"I bet you stand out for some other qualities," he chuckles. "You seem smart."

"I am. I think," she adds. She can't realize why she is so disoriented.

"My name is Steve. Steve Harrington."

"Robin Buckley."

And he does this thing with his face, almost like a flinch, a recognition. It is brief but it is there and Robin has seen it, and there is something so weird with him.

Steve drops his gaze, and the weirdness of this situation hits Robin. Why would someone introduce himself just by randomly crashing into someone in the grocery store? What was that familiarity feeling? Why couldn't she just let him go? She followed him there, for fuck's sake.

"Do I know you?" she asks.

Steve just looks at her again, and stares. There is this gleam in his pupils, eyes almost wet, and Robin could swear that it looked so much like hope. For what, she doesn't know.

"I don't think so," and his words sound like a lie.

"Oh. I am–I am sorry, um, this is weird. It's just that I—I have this—"

"Gnawing feeling?" Steve finished.

And yes, that was exactly what she wanted to say.

There is something that Robin feels like it's trapped in the air. Something strange and beautiful, and caged somewhere, fighting with all its forces to break free, but she can't identify it.

"It's okay," he says. "It'll go away. It always does."

Steve smiles at her and it is sad. Robin is starting to get mad, and weirdly emotional and she doesn't know where it comes from and it's infuriating not to know. Her voice kind of wobbles when she speaks again.

"You speak like a total dingus."

Steve laughs. Suddenly and bright and honest, and she laughs too.

"I do. Yeah, I do."

Something is off, but it feels so right. Robin just can't place it. And it must shows in her face because Steve says, "it's okay."

And it is how he says it, like he knows what she is going through, but how could he possibly know.

"See you around, Buckley," he says, so affectionate that aches to hear.

He leaves her there, standing in the middle of the aisle, organizing her own thoughts.

Facts: she knows him. Her body, her heart, her soul reacted at his presence, that much is true. Eddie knows him too. But they just can't remember him.

So many questions, so may things to discover.

Robin smiles.

Robin is a lot of things, but above all, she is curious.

And smart.

And stubborn enough to find her answers.

#inklessletter #fic #stranger things fic #fanfic #ficlet #robin buckley #steddie #stranger things #steve harrington #eddie munson #st fic

[sunkissedchld]

𝐏𝐈𝐂𝐊 𝐀 𝐂𝐀𝐑𝐃

𝒂 𝒍𝒊𝒕𝒕𝒍𝒆 𝒂𝒃𝒐𝒖𝒕 𝒚𝒐𝒖𝒓 𝒂𝒏𝒄𝒆𝒔𝒕𝒐𝒓𝒔 + 𝒘𝒉𝒂𝒕'𝒔 𝒄𝒐𝒎𝒊𝒏𝒈 𝒕𝒐𝒘𝒂𝒓𝒅𝒔 𝒚𝒐𝒖 𝒔𝒐𝒐𝒏

the piles go from top left to right. so, the coffee with heart shaped ice is pile i, the brown clouds are pile ii, and so on and so forth.

take the time to close your eyes, breathe, and meditate on the PAC prompt, then open your eyes and let your guides lead you to the pile for you. i hope you enjoy!

𝐏𝐈𝐋𝐄 𝐈

Shufflemancy:

“Better In Color” by Lizzo

“Do It Like A Dude” by Jessie J

"Dolphin" by Oh My Girl

"Break Free" by Ariana Grande

Signs:

1:23, mixed race, water placement/dominance

Reading:

you may come from a more matriarchal family line, as it's mainly the women that speak clearly in this reading. the women in your family are typically powerful, well-spoken, straight-forward, fiery, and confident. the men may be the type to lay back and let the women lead because they know best if that makes sense.

the maternal line of your ancestors seem to be so proud of you. they think you're doing a good job of balancing everything you are dealing with. although you're doing well, they don't want you to slack off just because they let you know that you're doing well. if you keep working hard, your blessings will continue to reign in.

your paternal line seem to be somewhat like the traditonal father figure. they're more quiet and in the background. they may want to connect with you more, but you don't reach out or they don't know how to best approach you. they love how you seem to mimic the women in your family with your confidence and knowledge.

you might be coming out of a negative or stressful situation. maybe you were unorganized before or just recently went through a bad breakup. honestly, some things may still be hidden from you. do your shadow work, babe. that will also be helpful in your journey to getting what's for you.

you have a lot of good coming in soon! this could be partnerships and travel opportunities; you might even move to a different country. you may rekindle old flames soon. your commitment to doing well and succeeding will be a great assest as long as you keep it in check. don't become too greedy or prideful - this will bring about the opposite effects (more bad breakups, unwelcome change, etc).

𝐏𝐈𝐋𝐄 𝐈𝐈

Shufflemancy:

“Left and Right” by Seventeen

“Rent” from Rent

"Better Off" by Ariana Grande

Signs:

rebellion, fire placements/dominance, ancestry.com, 23&me, teachers/teaching, civil rights, earth placements/dominance

Reading:

your ancestors are funny lmao. they also had a ton to say. you could connect with them easily because of their willingness to speak so freely. if you chose this pile, you might wanna do something like a family tree or figuring out your family line/ancestry. your ancestors might have been something like freedom fighters? they were the type to fight for justice and call out inequality when they saw it.

they're telling you to meditate and let go - which seems interesting because i initially felt them as very fiery people. it's like they're fiery but for specific reasons. they don't seem to be the revenge type in my opnion. you might feel as if you're in a stagnant point in your life. you might want more from what you're currently participating in. you want to go so fast and do so much, but your ancestors are telling you to be patient and wait. you're not ready - not yet.

this is gonna feel like a lecture, but you can't go out and do whatever it is you want to do simply because you feel like it. this is gonna sound weird, but you're not as important as you think you are. you need to learn how to serve others because right now, you're being very selfish. you're needed on this earth to help others; your goal in this life is to put others before yourself. you're not gonna receive anything until this selfish air of yours leaves.

𝐏𝐈𝐋𝐄 𝐈𝐈𝐈

Shufflemancy:

“Redbone” by Childish Gambino

“My Boo” by Usher and Alicia Keys

"Pick Up Your Feelings" by Jazmine Sullivan

"The Worst" by Jhene Aiko

"Focus" by H.E.R

"Do It" by Chloe x Halle

Signs:

latinx, taino, cuban, cuba, puerto rico, boricua, 3, 7, crown chakra, third eye

Reading:

the men in your family line might have been (and might still be) treated like children, or they or they usually die when they're still pretty young. both sides of your family are a force to reckon with. magic and spirituality may run deep. i think those that pick this pile may be latnix, so maybe practices like santería, voodoo, or hoodoo may already be prominent in your family.

you've been setting plans and intentions lately - expect to see a reward. interestingly, both the emperor and emperess came out during this reading! you are obviously on the right path in terms of bringing in a ton of abundance and also being stable for both yourself and your family (i have a feeling family is very important to people in this pile). although you feel like you're doing everything right you may actually feel as if this isn't what you're cut out for. you may be overwhelmed. i'm reminded of Luisa from Encanto. eventually these feelings will go away, but if you don't properly address them they will pop back up time and time again. your third eye and crown chakra may be blocked, and healing them may help you with what you're feeling right now.

this feeling of seemingly doing good but actually feeling as if everything is not right for you could also explain your love life instead of work/material/family life. maybe everything seems like it's going on the right path. you might've been together for a healthy amount of time, and the next step seems to be marriage or something more, but it's not really what you want, or a facade is being put on in order for the relationship to seem that way.

the best advice i can give for this pile is to follow your heart. take time for yourself in isolation and listen. listne to your heartbeat, your pulse, your thoughts, and/or nothing. just listen. then follow.

𝐏𝐈𝐋𝐄 𝐈𝐕

Shufflemancy:

“Song For You” by Avery Wilson

“Sorry, I Love You” by Stray Kids

"Dancing Like Butterfly Wings" by Ateez

"Lose Control" by Missy Elliott

"Celebrate" by Ateez

Signs:

youngest/only child, physical touch as a love language, newbie, noob, talkative, air/water placements or dominance

Reading:

your ancestors are cute. they seemed to be new to this whole magic/tarot thing. they had a lot they wanted say, but the cards seemed to stutter or come out all at once. they really wanted me to get to the point with this reading. they didn't even introduce themselves before saying new opportunities are coming in for you!

ace of sticks and death both came upright, and both of those cards indicate changes, transformations, and new opportunities coming in. i also think it's ironic that i'm writing about new things coming in a few hours before the new year. everything seems to be right in front of you. your spirit asteroid may be in a fire sign.. maybe leo? or maybe that's too bright. aquarius? libra? virgo? any of those imo.

interestingly, the hierophant came out twice from two different decks. your ancestors want you to lean on them. maybe the reason they seemed to be new to me is because they have a specific way of speaking through the cards that i'm not used to - it may be easier for you to understand them naturally (which makes sense because they're your ancestors - not mine lol). you may be the newbie in terms of magic/tarot and things of the like. i also sense that you could be the youngest person in your family or an only child. you could've been doted on a lot. as a result, you could be a little immature.

you might feel lonely or disconnected from family right now. your ancestors are wanting you to reach out to them personally because they can heal you from whatever is burdening you in relation to your family. the maternal side of your ancestors seem to want to comfort you specifically; your paternal side on the other hand wants to offer guidance. your anxiety will go away with their help, and material goodness will also usher in. go talk to them. also, if you felt drawn to pile ii, go read it. parts of it are for you.

𝐏𝐈𝐋𝐄 𝐕

Shufflemancy:

"Be Blessed" by Yolanda Adams

"Just Be A Man About It" by Toni Braxton

"All Me" by Kehlani and Keyshia Cole

"Let It Burn" by Jazmine Sullivan

Signs:

reversals, rx, dad/daddy, father, manipulation, liar, jealousy, miss robinson, The Devil, earth/water placements or dominance

Reading:

this pile was both interesting and confusing because sooo many reversals came out. i'm talking 5+ more reversals at a time. maybe you're currently going through a confusing time in general and that's how the cards decided to manifest to show that.

your ancestors want to warn you of negative energy surrounding you. someone is manupilating you or lying to you. something is hidden from you. this could also be why the cards are reversed so much. they're yelling. someone is pretending to care for you and be your friend, but they are very much so not. at all. be careful of your surroundings and the company you keep.

you may want to lean on your paternal line during this time. they may provide wisdom on leadership and discerning between people's true intentions towards you. "father knows best" comes to mind with this pile.

the person manipulating you is a pathologicl liar, a con artist, and a person who is jealous of you. they want to take everything from you and bring you down to their level. if you know who this is, get rid of them immediately. if not, please try to be discerning or go into hermit mode to try and protect yourself. honestly, they may be using things like magic or hexes because of how obssessed and jealous of you they are. with the eight of knives, you will eventually get out of this situation, but it's kind of like quicksand. it'll feel like you're constantly sinking in, but you have to keep fighting.

in this reading, the story of Miss Robinson comes up. Miss Robinson was a rootworker who found out that another woman was speaking bad on her and putting people against her. Miss Robinson confronted the woman and told her that if she knew what was best for her, the woman would stop trying to steal her joy and spread negativity on her. the woman continued to do so anyways. a little less than a month later, the woman's only son died. Miss Robinson sat fanning herself with the obiturary, and the next day, the woman left.

this story of Miss Robinson will play out if this person keeps messing with you. i get the feeling that your ancestors have protected you beyond anyone else's control. they're not going to let this person ruin your joy. you will come out on top in the end. your success is the revenge.

additionally, there will be a partnership coming in! your manifestations may come true soon (january/february). this person will be caring, generous, and youthful. they might be younger than you. for some people who choose this pile, this person will be harmless. for others, this could be manipulator talked about for the majority of this pile. again, please be discerning.

i'm sorry i said almost nothing about you ancestral line, but they felt it was more important that i give you this message. i share what the cards and spirit give me, ya know? also, as i tried to save this, it almost didn't save/almost got deleted.. someone does not want you knowing this information. as said before, your ancestors aren't fooling with that energy.

𝐏𝐈𝐋𝐄 𝐕𝐈

Shufflemancy:

"stranger in my house" by tamia valmont;

"deja vu" by ateez

"side effects" by stray kids

"the tortise and the hare" by stray kids

"victory song" by stray kids

Signs:

indie arie, ocean, water/air placements or dominance, church, grandma's hands by bill withers

Reading:

you maternal ancestors might've been the church mothers. if you know what that is, this pile is for you lmao. they helped everyone and were always giving people a shoulder to cry on.

you might be feeling depressed right now. maybe you're frustrated or misunderstood. you may be thinking of all you've missed out on, or you've been working so much that you're missing out on all the fun life has to offer. you might feel so worried about the future and have no idea what you'll be doing. relax and go with the flow for now.

although you feel underappreciated now, you will move up in life because of your work. expect internships, a degree, or even an upgrade in position. you will find your way after this period of negative thinking. don't worry about poverty or anything like that. you hardwork will be rewarded. you will come into the spotlight because of your efforts.

#tarot #oracle #pick a card #PAC #tarotblr #Spotify #sunkissedchld

[nothomegal]

"My beloved monster"

(Pyramid Head x GN Reader)

Summary: There are always limitations for someting, and when these affect your ability to show love, it becomes a huge deal, so big that it's crushing... Devastating actually. But love itself is a weird thing. It may not break down said limitations. But maybe, it can make you accept and find your own ways to love instead?...

Warnings: a bit angsty at the begining (but lots of love at the end!)

Word Count: 2.1k

(Y/N) looks at their monster, concern filling their chest as they take in his uncannily still form. Since the moment they woke up they knew something was wrong, because one; they were laying on a mattress instead of their lover's body. And two, because Pyra seemed troubled, he looked so unnaturally dull and gloomy…

His helmet positioned lower than usual, as if his gaze is constantly down, his shoulders slump, his overall posture hunched as if something heavy is dragging his body down…

Is he… Is he sad?

This possible explanation both concerned and intrigued (Y/N). They are aware that Pyra’s feelings and mind don’t exactly work like human's, in occasions it feels like he’s being guided by instincts rather than thoughts (especially when things get intimate). But right now it seems like he's experiencing something big, big enough to send him into this wretched state.

With a sigh, (Y/N) stands up from the matress and slowly makes their way towards the beast, their steps careful and a tag hesitant since they had no idea what to expect.

—"Pyra?... Are you alright big guy?"— you ask, concern lingering in your tone.

But the monster didn't move or made any noise of acknowledgment, which obviously made (Y/N) frown. They step even closer, and still no reaction.

—"Did I do something wrong?..."— you ask despite knowing well that you didn't, but you still felt the need to apologize. —"If so I'm very sorry. If you need time alone then I'll leave- "—

A deep low growl was all it took to shut them up. (Y/N) stiffed in their place as they wait to see what will happen next. But instead of witnessing something volent, Pyra only tilted his helmet evel lower, appearing even more upset whith whatever is bothering him.

This image of him was enough for (Y/N) to collect the courage to move again, making their way to their lover's sitting form. This time however, they don't speak or ask anything, instead they carefully place their hand on his large shoulder and let it stay there for a while.

When there was still no reaction, they began to slowly caress his skin. Hand slowly traveling from his big arm to his broad back, which seemed to do the job in soothing him judging by the way his muscles began to relax under their touch. That until their hand traveled to his helmet, and the second it made contact with the metallic surface, a noise nearly resempling a roar errupted from it, causing (Y/N) to recoil violently almost as if their hand got burned.

They stay frozen, clutching their hand tightly and close to their chest as they observe Pyra, feeling both sad that they aren't able to help him and afraid that they may pushed their luck too far.

And to make things worse, their fear seemed to upset the beast even further, because soon another even angrier and louder roar errupted from the monster as he grabs the enges of his helmet tightly. This made (Y/N) even more afraid, but no longer for themselves, but for Pyra.

What is going on?! Is he in pain? Does his head hurt? Why is he so angry all of the sudden? Why...

Why does it look like he wants to rip his helmet off?...

Carefully and slowly, (Y/N) makes their way back to their lover. Movements wary and cautious, like they're in front of some wild animal.

When close enough, they notice something with the corner of their eye. It's a book, one they accidentaly stumble upon somewhere and been reading time to time. It wasn't anything special, just an classic old romance whith a lot of text and the only picture being the cover, which portraited the two protagonists being in each other's embrace and pressing their foreheads together in a loving and affectionate manner.

Oh... OH.

(Y/N)'s head snaps towards their lover, a frown placed on their face at the sight of his miserable form that was still holding his helmet and growling angrily, hatefully, at it.

—"Pyra..."— you call out softly as you step closer. —"Hey."—

They place their hands on top of his larger ones, making the beast stop fidgeting in place and stay completely still again.

—"Is that why you're upset?..."— you ask, voice gentle.

At first the beast does nothing. But when (Y/N) squeezed his hands slightly, that's when a metallic noise was made, which was something in between of metal scraping and a whine. It was new noise, noise that expressed nothing but misery.

But who wouldn't be upset after realizing how little one can do with their loved one while looking like this? A monster with no face, created with the sole purpose to spread pain upon others and drag them through eternal punishment. Pyramid Head never was supposed to love, he never was supposed to care for anything or anyone, only hunt and execute. But after (Y/N) came into this place... Just tell me, how couldn't he want more of them? How couldn't he desire to keep them? How couldn't he crave to have them close and feel their soft warm body against his? To feel excitement whenever they speak, the gentle tone of their voice, the sweet things they say about a creature like him... To fall further for them at the sensation of their soft lips on his damaged scarred skin, a gesture they made to tell him just how much he means to them withouth the need to use words...

(Y/N) can do so many things to show the love, affection and respect they have for him. Of course he tries to show them his desire for them too, but he can do so little... And that's just devastating. No matter how much noises he makes, no matter how carefully he tries to nuzzle his helmet against them... It will never resemble anything that another human could do to show love, it will never feel as sencere as what (Y/N) does... And it will never be possible for him to say these three words that make his inhuman heart pause and his chest squeeze in warmth whenever they leave (Y/N)'s lips...

These three words...

I love you.

After these intense seconds of dead silence passed, (Y/N) decided to take the matters in their hands and try again.

Slowly they slide their hands off of his and into his helmet. And this time the beast didn't pull away or made a sound, he just sat there in complete stillness.

—"I understand that we cannot do certain things..."— you say as you step closer. —"But do you think I care?"—

As they speak in a gentle voice, they run their hands along the metallic surface, caressing it carefully.

—"When I say 'I love you', I mean I love you, whole."— you smile as you say that. —"Head and everything included. I love you whole Pyra."—

Their words seemed to slowly break him, as another of these strange whines was emited. His hand slid off his helmet and placed on (Y/N)'s hips. For a second they thought he would push them away, but he doesn't, he simply keeps his hands on them.

Suddenly, (Y/N) stopped their caresses. Wich understandably caused Pyra's grip on them to tighten, as if to prevent they pull away from him. But of course, that's not something a deranged person like (Y/N) would do, instead they lean forward and wrap their arms around his helmet and press themselves closer to it.

—"And I don't say it expecting you'll say it back."— you mutter softly as you resume your caresses. —"But I know when you do try to say it back. It may not be through voice, or a kiss, or any other more intimate and 'human' action. And it doesn't make it any less important, if anything, it makes it more special."—

The two of them remain like this for a while. I probably looked so weird to embrace Pyra's helmet like that, but non of them seemed to mind it.

With a soft hum, (Y/N) pulls back just a bit and presses their forehead against the metallic surface.

—"Look, we can do that too."— you say playfully. —"Just like in the book's cover!"—

It was an immature and a cheap thing to do, (Y/N) knows it. But their efforts were recieved positively anyways judging by the soft rumble that was emited from the monster and the small careful tilt he did with his head to press it further against theirs.

However, this time (Y/N) didn't remain still for too long. Their arms soon unwrapped and began to travel down until their hands slipped underneath the beast's helmet. The second their fingers made contact with the soft and slimy flesh, a small shiver run through the monster's body.

—"Well, I know this is not something I could do with another human... But do I care? Absolutely not!"— you chuckle as you start to gently scratch the fleshy mass. —"And the fact that you even allow me to touch you there already tells me how much trust you have in me. See? No extra words or actions needed for me to understand how big of a deal it is."—

Their voice and scratches were soon recieved with the well known low rumbling, that was so similar to a deep purr. Pyra's hands slowly began to slide off their form as his body relaxed with each second. (Y/N) couldn't help but to childishly grin at his state, he looked so happy, almost like a cat recieving a good scratch.

They were about to tell more things, but the beast decided it was enough reassurance and that it's time for him to take action.

(Y/N) let out a surprised yelp when their body was suddenly dragged down by a great force and slammed against a solid torso. It all happened so fast that it took them a couple of seconds to process what just happened. The embrace was tight, keeping them caged in the beast's arms, so closely that it was almost suffocating...

Any normal person would freak out at that, too concerned about the wellbeing of their spine. But (Y/N)? Nah.

They let a small yet joyful laught as they attempted to wrap their arms around Pyra's waist, though due to their limited mobility and his huge size it was quite a task. Nevertheless, their attempts were appreciated anyways, and the amused rumple was a proof of it.

The monster curls his larger body around his human a bit more, holding them tightly and closely. So closely that he could feel their heartbeat, heartbeat that was slow and perfectly rhythmic, indicating just how calm and content (Y/N) was in his arms, trusting him completely and totally unafraid of his monstrous strength.

It was unclear how long they've been holding each other like that. It could be minutes, it could be hours... But what was clear for both of them, was that they didn't want to let go of each other, not now, not anytime soon.

Until...

—"Hey Pyra, one last thing."— you suddenly say.

Their sentence was responded by a quizical rumble.

—"Can you stick out your tongue for a second?"—

At first there is no reaction, as if Pyra was caught off guard with this seemingly random request. Nevertheless, he lose his grip on them just enough to allow his human to lean back. And as they do so, the pink muscle was already sticking out of the corner of his helmet and curiously wiggling in place.

(Y/N) smiles and gently grabs the tongue with both hands, slowly pulling it closer to them. They silently observe it for a comple of seconds, before bringing it right to their lips and giving a small kiss. Yes, it felt weird, maybe disgusting for some. But not for (Y/N).

After that sweet gesture they glance at their lover, who was completely frozen in place, even his tongue was no longer wiggling.

—"Look, we just kissed!"— you announce with a cheerful laugh. —"Y'know, maybe I was wrong. Maybe there aren't as many limitations as we thought. Sure, some methods are weird and all... But doesn't it feel more special? More like... Ours?"—

The monster remains unresponsive for a while, either thinking or just staring at their little naive form. Whatever the case it, their genuine expression of joy and warmth was enough to melt away whatever bits of doubt their lover had, and the shy wiggling of his tongue towards their lips was a clear demonstration of that.

After sharing some more 'kisses', (Y/N) was soon pulled back into this suffocating embrace again. And this time, it wasn't just desperate...

It was also warm, affectionate, intimate... Absolutelly everything about this embrace screamed one message and one message only, which combined with the soft purrs and noises coming from the beast, was much more clear...

I love you.

#nothomegal fic #nothomegal oneshot #gn reader #pyramid head x reader #pyramid head #slasher x reader #slasher fluff

[formulaonesmut]

Better in red – CL16

important message

writers note: I have dyslexia, which means that writing is difficult for me, but I really want to continue doing this. Sorry if everything isn't always right!

Warnings: Smut 18+, P in V ( be safe!) sort of first time, sweet Charles turning into dom. Insecure reader.

Sorry for not posting this but I really don't like this fic, I don't know but I'm not happy with this one.

let me know who you want to be next!

this is my work and i do not consent to use this

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Saturday 19 November 2022 ahu Dhabi Final race,

Exactly on this day, 4 months ago you met the one and only Charles leclerc. A dream that came true. You started a year ago with your new job at F1, you started with being a extra hand. That meant that you helped with the interviews, making it ready, making sure everything was there in time.

Almost a year later your dream came out, you started officially working as a journalist for f1TV. And there it was, questioning drivers about their races was amazing but not the easiest job. And it didn’t got any better when you started to gain feelings for Charles leclerc. At first you thought that it was only a crush and he didn’t seemed interested, until 4 months ago. You were standing alone in the doorway, Charles passed by but within 10 seconds he called your name

´´yn is it right?´´ he smiled, offering you a hand, of course you took it before you gently shaked it.

´´ yeah i am. Is there anything wrong?´´ you blushed, he totally caught you off guard and you were already preparing yourself

´´ so ehm- im not really good in this, and if you don’t want too is that okay, but eh´´ Charles rumbled but you were quick in stopping him.

´´ hey, its okay! Go on spit it out leclerc´´ you chuckled, your finger pads slowly running up and down over his hand palm.

´´do you wanna go out with me?´’´

There is were it all started, and now you guys are dating. It still feels unreal sometimes, your dating the one and only CHARLES LECLERC!!!!!

Its weird and iknow many people wont believe you, but you guys haven’t had sex, or something you needed to be naked for. Yes hand jobs and fingering were something, but Charles knew that you just had sex, for once. He always letted you set the pace, and making sure YOU were comfy with it.

Maybe it was weird, but you guys didn’t wanted to make it official for the world, so you both decided to not share a room. This so no one noticed that you guys were almost a couple. And to be honest, it was hard to act normal when you were in the paddock. This guy had you around one finger and you loved him so so so much.

--

You were running late for your interview with Carlos in the Ferrari hospitality. Yes, when i say running you were running.

´hey princess´ Charles smiled when he saw you running through the halls.

Your eyes quickly scanned the room before running up to him.

´´ how late are you back? When are you done´´ Charles smiled down to you. God this guy.. so handsome, every time you saw him you just could not hold your self in and just started smiling.

´ may i.. kiss you?´ he asked you, his hand came upwards to cup your cheek. Brushing some hair behind your ear.

´yes .. please Charles kiss me´ you half begged him before he dipped down to your level and kissed you.

It felt so unreal and you just couldn’t stop searching for his touch, his fingers intertwined with your hair both off you don’t want to let each other go.

‘’ah here you are. Love birds I have a interview’’ Carlos chuckled before leaning in the doorway.

Carlos was the only one along side Pierre that knew that you guys are something. Not that you wanted them to know but they caught you already a few times kissing.

‘’I’m sorry Carlos’’ you sight before letting Charles go.

‘’I'm done at 6 babe’’ you smiled before giving Charles a quick kiss.

‘’good, see you tonight baby’’

- later that night –

When your phone ringed you immediately rushed too it, your hands quick in grabbing it and picking it up while you were fixing your hair.

´´ there is my pretty girl´´ Charles smiled through the phone.

´´ hi handsome´´ you smiled while your bottom lip was stuck between your teeth.

The call was innocent, a lot of talking about F1 and small other things. But something inside you snapped when Charles started whining.

´´ baby, cant you pleeeaaase come over i really miss you´´

´´ Charlie, you already saw me today´´ you smiled

Charles is really nervous because he is starting 3th tomorrow in the last race off 2022. There is a lot off pressure that’s on his shoulders, he is standing second with 290 points amazing right? Not really.. checo has the same amount off points and is starting second.

Charles was so hectic today, picking his hands, moving his leg up and down and he was talking non stop. That was for you a easy sign to see that he was nervous, and it wasn’t weird.

You knew you had to do something to take his mind off racing for a night, you knew you were ready and this was the perfect timing to.

You walked to your bed before laying on your belly, lifting yourself up on your elbows. So you were Giving Charles THE perfect look, your shirt was hanging down a bit giving him a sneak peak off your boobs that were covered in your new red and gold lingerie bra. you could see his eyes immediately shooting down, he was really trying not to look. But it just happened and he wasn’t sorry for it, Charles loved your body and always tried to help you start loving yourself.

´´ baby.. don’t make it harder for me to stay in my room´´ he smiled, his cheeks already heating and coloring up.

´´’what’s wrong handsome?´´ you questioned him, but of course you knew what was wrong. And once again his eyes shooed down and stayed there.

´’i can see my pretty baby’s´´ he smiled. ´´ oh come on baby, you know what i mean´´ Charles winked, his eyes quickly shooting from your boobs to your eyes.

´´oh? Do you want a better view so you can sleep well?´´ you teased back, Charles quickly nodded yes before you tugged your shirt over your head. Charles mumbled a quick ´fuck´ before he turned his head away, a big smile was on his face and his cheeks were even more red.

´´were are you staying handsome? I wanna come over´’

´´room 418, be quick. The door is already open´’ and with that Charles ended the call, and fuck he knew what your plans were.

The tension between you two was unwritable, from little teasing through out the day to sending him a photo in your new lingerie.

You were quick in chancing, grabbing only your phone and a bathrobe. You shooed it over your lingerie and rushed out, and yes. The door was already open and when you opened it you could only gasp.

Charles had changed into a white blouse, it was hanging open and the room was dark, but filled with candles. On the bed was drawn a heart and there was music playing on the back ground.

´I knew that you were quick´ he smiled before walking up to you, his hand brushing over your shoulder.

´´ you didn’t had to do this Charlie´´ you smiled while your eyes where wandering around the room.

´´ I wanted to make it special for my special girl´´

You could feel Charles his eyes burning on your skin, even when he stepped a little closer to you. His body pressing against yours, his warm breath on your skin and his eyes trying to look what you were wearing underneath the bathrobe.

´´ give me a kiss handsome´´

And within 3 seconds Charles his lips were pressed onto yours, his tongue parts your lips and you could feel his body shivering with desire,

Charles his hands shooed to the back off your thighs. That was a signal for you to jump into his arms, you slammed your legs around his waist without braking the kiss. And before you knew it your back was slammed against the wall.

´´fuck handsome´´ you moaned into the kiss, giving Charles perfect access to explore your mouth, Charles had trapped you between him and the wall, and on this moments he was so happy that he was an athlete.

You could feel that One off his hands sneaked upwards trying to open your bathrobe.

´´ no no Charlie ´´ you slapped his hands away from your bathrobe while you broke the kiss. Your head overloading with ideas. And one perfectly matched.

´´oh. Didn’t knew you were in charge´´ Charles smirked, that goddamn cocky bastard.

You softly pushed yourself away from the wall before jumping out Charles his arms.

´´what are you-´´ Charles frowned slightly before you pushed him backwards.

´´ come on sit ´´ you patted the edge off the bed. Charles wasn’t a person that loved to obey someone but today, he wanted to give you a chance.

´Your hands slowly moved up and down his chest and his breathing was already gaining up in speedy mode.

You slowly took a step backwards, your hands made a way to the knot in your bathrobe before untying it. The bathrobe perfectly fell from your shoulders, completely exposing your body in the brand new red and gold lingerie set.

It was the set you got from Charles, and he was always complaining about it. He wanted to see you in it.

´´ fuck... so pretty baby´´ Charles breath out, and just completely sat there, admiring your body. his hands came up to feel your body, almost as if he was dreaming this.

´´ fucking hell baby. you look so so good in red baby´´

And yes it was such a beautiful set! The bralette just covering enough off your boobs, it perfectly hugged your skin and it made your body look like you were on fire, but you still felt insecure about it.

Before Charles could talk again you took place on his lap, facing him and Each leg beside his. His mouth hung open and his eyes are locking in with yours.

´´you look so good baby.. Fuck your driving me crazy´´ he repeated, his eyes scanning you up and down again before reaching out for your hands. he could tell you a thousand times how good you looked.

´´feel what you do to me baby´´ he blushed, his hands took yours to his chest. Placing it on his chest so you could feel his heart beating.

´´fuck i cant take my eyes off you. and im so proud to call you mine´´

´´don’t stare so much Charles.. that’s rude´´ you chuckled but he definitely could hear the in secureness in your voice.

´´’don’t see what’s wrong with your body, your perfect the way you are I’m just disappointed that you don’t know how gorgeous you are´´ Charles smiled while one of his finger traced your jawline.

´´ its just.. i think i could be a little more .. trimmed´´ you sighed while looking down.

´´ Cherrie i love your body, everything you ´hate´ about it is what drives me crazy.´´ Charles smiled before softly grabbing your jaw, making you to look at him.

´´fuck you don’t know how many people in the paddock are looking at you when you enter i almost feel jealous the way they look at you´´ he told you. His eyes searching for yours before he brought you in a big long hug

Its almost weird how comfortable you felt yourself in his arms, it immediately felt safe

´´you don’t have to be shy or insecure around me okay? Your my perfect girl and i want you to feel special baby.´´ Charles smiled before he placed his hands on your waist, he adjusted you a little bit better on his crotch before his hands started to roll your hips over his crotch.

´´ mhm fuck Charlie´´ you breath out while you hid your face in his neck. Planting a few kisses in his neck while his hands kept rolling your hips.

Charles his hand shooed to your ass before grabbing the back of your thong, pulling it a bit upwards what made you moan. He pulled it backwards so it was more pressuring your clit and once his hands started moving your hips again you could only moan in his ear.

You have done this so much together, just like two honry teenagers. Grinding on each other, he even made you ride a pillow in front off him because you didn’t dropped your attitude.

´´fuck Charles please i need you so badly´´ you say while kissed his neck.

´´ you sure Cherrie?´´ Charles asked you, he waited 3 months long for his moment. But he had too make sure that you wanted this just as bad as he wanted.

´´ yes Charlie I’m ready and i want you now´´ you smiled while you tried to hide the blush that was coloring your cheeks.

´´ then you don’t hear me complaining, do you want me to be in charge Cherrie´´ Charles was always so caring and it really made your heart melt.

´´ you please. Please please pl-´´ before you could finish Charles connected your lips with his´. His tongue was exploring your mouth while he was quick in flipping you over so he was hanging on top of you, one of his hands came upwards to push the hair that had fallen in front off your face behind your ear before reaching his destination around your throath. He squeezed it gently but enough to make you head go fuzzy.

He took this as a opportunity to get more power over your body, he tilted your jaw up, placing kisses alongside it while his hand is still around your throat. And he clearly enjoyed the feeling when you swallowed.

´´ open that pretty mouth Cherrie´´ Charles demanded you, you were really quick in obeying. You opened your mouth and sticked out your tongue. A string spit quickly followed from Charles his mouth to yours.

´´now swallow it like a good girl´´ Charles breath out. The feeling off your throat moving underneath his hand gave him a powerful feeling. Small whimpers and whines were heard as he licked a stipe down your neck. Charles moved his attention lower, trailing more kissed to the exposed parts off your neck, before sucking a hickey.

You and Charles talked a lot about sex, so knew you that Charles loved to be in control but also loved your mouth, and he quickly knew that you loved it to got treated as a bad girl.

His mouth was lowering to the straps of your bra before grabbing one in his mouth. He carefully shoved it down your shoulder, the feeling of his stubble and the warm breathing on your exposed chest were giving you goosebumps.

When they both were hanging loose around your shoulders he easily flipped you around, his body still towering above you while he settled both knees on the outside of your thighs.

His both hands came down, his fingers tracing from your neck down, over your shoulders down to your bra, too your waist and stopping by your ass.

´´ such a beautiful back baby´´ Charles mumbled before pushing his hips forward, pressing his crotch against your ass, you could feel the outlines of his harding dick against your ass. Each off his hands layed on one of your ass cheeks before gently squeezed it.

´´oh god please... Charlie do something´´ you whined.

´´ I’m going to show you´´ he says while running his hands up and down over your bra before taking it off. ´´ who your god is Cherrie´´ he continued.

His fingers were playing with the end off your thong while he bended down and licked one long stripe up from your ass to your neck.

´´mmhm Cherrie turn around´´ he said while he hangs in a high plank above you.

And so you did, pushing yourself upwards just like a push up before coming up with your knee to help you. Your ass perfectly pushing against his crotch before you could turn around.

It made you both laugh because it seemed easier then it was. And just for a second you didn’t realized that your boobs were fully exposed to him.

´´ such as beautiful as i thought Cherrie´´ he smiled and leaned down to give you a quick kiss, his mouth immediately wandering down, to your jawline, neck and slowly down to your breasts. His tongue painfully slow running over your nipple before giving it a quick suck.

´´ please char do something, i cant- just cant wait any longer. I really need you´´ you whined out, your eyes were almost glued to his arms, those veins that were running over his arm, they looked like they were going to explode.

´´ you want my fingers baby?´ ´Charles groaned

´´ mhm´´

´´ come on use your words Cherrie, where do you want them´´

´´please inside me.. please daddy´´ you could see Charles swallowing by the nickname ´daddy´ even tho he never wanted to admit that he liked it.

He settled himself on his knees between your legs, after his hand quickly made work off your thong.

´´ spread your legs wider princess´´ Charles told you. He could see the scariness in your eyes and it wasn’t easy to just spread them, but you trusted him.

His finger easily found his way down to your already wet pussy, his fingers dipping into your wetness, spreading it over your pussy before circling his finger pad on your clit.

´´ so wet already´´ Charles mumbled ´´ come on darling let me hear you´´

It was scared but you tried to take your mind off that, the way charles his fingers perfectly circled over your clit made you already see stars.

´´fuck yes Charles!´´ you moaned out. Hands gripping the sweets. Nails digging into the fabric.

His finger teased your entrance before giving in and slowly inserted his finger.

´´fuck you feel so good already baby, cant wait to feel you clenching around my dick´´ charles moaned

Charles was definitely a talker in bed, and fuck that was so hot. The way he can turn you on so easily just by words.

His finger started pumping in and out you, those hands can make a woman dream so easily.

he brought his thumb to your clit. Circling it over your sensitive bud The squelching sound of your wetness reached your ears while he pumps his finger in and out you.

His thumb sets a faster pace on your clit, making your toes curl and your nails dig into your hand palm.

‘’ that’s it princess’’ he said while adding another finger , curling them upwards, making sure the pads of his finger where touching that sweet spot inside you, your body begins to shake, your walls clenching around his fingers.

‘’your going to make a mess on my fingers princess?’’ you nod while moaning heavily.

‘’’yes .. yes char.. I’m s-so close’’ your mind falls blank, just feeling and hearing his fingers inside you, touching constantly the sweet spot that was driving you closer and closer to the edge.

And then it just hits you, your back arched off the bed, goosebumps all over your body, toes curled while you moaned Charles his name.

Charles gave you a little bit time, his hands slightly massaged your upper thighs

´´ I’m not done yet baby, I know that you easily could have a second run without a brake´´ Charles winked before diving into your dripping pussy. His tongue perfectly lapping your clit while he pushed 2 fingers inside you, his fingers angled a little bit upwards. Making sure to hit your G-spot inside you.

‘’oh fuck ..’’ a slightly louder moan had slipped out, suddenly as his nose dragged over your clit perfectly while his tongue continued to make your toes curl.

He hummed in appreciation of your praise, sending vibrations through your core before he moved his lips to your clit, managing to slip a finger inside you.

‘’ come on princess, let the neighbors hear who you belong to’’ he practically cooed up at you, not wasting any time in adding a second finger, pumping them in and out you in a fast pace.

‘’ oh god charlie.. ‘’ you moaned out, stomach twisting. His lips where back at your clit, causing you to roll your eyes back. He did everything right every time, his fingers stretching you out did not make a wrong move as they thrusted in and out you, his tongue flicked perfectly over your sensitive bud.

´´ you taste so good Cherrie´´ Charles mumbled

You could feel yourself getting closer and closer, the knot in your stomach was already forming while Charles settled the pace even higher.

‘’char.. I’m c-close’’

‘’your not allowed to cum baby, keep it in I know you can’’ Charles commanded you.

His fingers perfectly hitting your G-spot while his mouth and tongue were perfect in stimulating your clit.

‘’i-i- cant ..’’ you breath out.

‘’you cant what?’’’ he asked you while he took his mouth off you.

‘’im so close I cant h-hold it’’

Charles didn’t wanted you to finish that quick because he had all the time to make you feel special. He took carefully his fingers out before licking them clean

´´you taste always so good baby´'he smiled before leaning down and kissing your forehead.

‘’you did so good baby’’ he whispered.

*not a while later* ( small time skip, don’t know what to put here XD)

You turned his hand slowly before you pressed the tips on his middle and ring finger against your lips, you gave them a kiss before slowly wrapping your lips around them.

A grunt rumbled through his chest as both fingers sat in your wet mouth, tongue running between and around them. You pulled them out before pushing them right back in, lips tight around them as you slowly moved your head back and forth.

Your hand drifted towards his waistband, Charles was quick in grabbing your hands.

´´let me help you please Charlie´´´ He was making sure you 100% wanted to, and not the feeling you had to. Charles was quick in letting your hands go as you dragged his pants down his muscular thighs. Leaving him in his tight white Calvin’s.

Painfully slow you pulled his Calvin’s down, his hard cock slapping against his lower stomach, the tip coated completely in pre cum. Charles had propped himself up on his elbows to be able to look at you.

´´mhm so big char´´ you blushed.

You teasingly pressed a kiss onto his tip, watching it as it twitched and smiled to Charles who had already his eyes closed in anticipation.

´´ mhm fuck baby you know you don’t have too right´´ you only hummed in responds before your lips closed around his tip. A hissing sound left Charles his mouth, this was the first time he had you around his dick.

Your mouth was slowly bobbing up and down, spit dripping from the tip down his shaft.

Charles thought he was dreaming this. Fuck you were so perfect and just what he imagined

You kept bobbing your head up and down, charles was big but you managed to fit it all. You had no idea what to do so you kept repeating your movements.

‘’your doing it amazing baby- so goo-d’’ Charles moaned one hand intertwined with your hair helping you to hold your hair out off the way.

´´ tu le fais si bien ma princesse´ ( your doing it so good my princess) charles moaned out when the tip hitted the back off your throat.

You sped up your movements a bit in witch charles twitched. Moans filled the room and gosh it sounded so good.

You clenched your thighs together trying to get some friction. Even tho you had the most mind blowing orgasm 5 minutes ago you felt yourself so horny. Your body was feeling hot and it was almost if you could cum without even touching yourself.

Charles his hand came down to your head his fingers intertwined with your hair trying to make a swift ponytail.

´´'is this okay baby.. Fuck!´´ he cursed when you took him down your Throat

´´look at me baby.. fuck those eyes..´´ you followed his instructions while you kept sucking him. When you made eye contact you could only moan.

But before you knew it charles gently tugged you off his dick. And all you could do is whine.

´´stop whining so much or i will make you whine baby girl´´

´´ make me.´´ you told him, your bottom lip tugged between your teeth. You had no idea where the confidence came from but you needed to say it.

´´oh?´´ he smirked before leaning down and almost swallowing your lips. His tongue danced against yours. His hands grabbed the back off your thighs before turning you around, making you lay against the headboard on your back.

His mouth found once again your neck, sucking a hickey. His hand came down to his dick before his tip runned up and down your folds.

´´merde tellement mouillé pour moi´ ( fuck, so wet for me) he groaned before he looked at you.

´´you still sure you want this baby?´´ he asked you.

´´yes yes yes charles please ... please i need you to fill me up please´´ you begged him, your legs slammed around his waist trying to pull him closer.

He was slow and made sure you were okay. He slowly pushed his dick inside you, making you moan out loudly. The tight feeling made charles see stars too.

The way he filled you up was perfectly, the stretch, the sound and not to forget the feeling it was so amazing. His dick already Pressing against your G spot as he stilled his movements, giving you a moment to adjust to his size.

´´fuck you feel so so good and tight baby´´ charles groaned. his fingers digging into your hip making you move a bit.

´´fuck baby´´ charles groaned ´´are you okay baby?´´

´´yes Charles please.. just fuck me” you moaned, rolling your hips into his making him groan.

You could feel Charles twitched at your words, his hips gaining speed. Your mind falling blank at the feeling. His dick perfectly hitting your G-spot making your eyes roll back in your head.

‘’fuck, eyes here darling’’ he muttered between the heavy breaths, one of his hands were on your throat, his finger pads digging into the skin. Making your eyes rolling back even more.

‘’I said eyes here princess” he corrected you, his hand was on your neck to hold you in place when the other one rested beside your head.

He had you under his grip, moaning at his touch and begging him to keep going. His lips kissing and pinching at your skin as loud moans escaped your mouth, his trust became harder and harder.

But out of nowhere he stopped, trying to catch his breath while pulling out you.

“Don’t stop Charlie pleas-“ you whined

‘’ get on all fours baby’’ charles commanded you,´´ get on all fours don’t make me tell you again´´

You were quick in obeying him, you felt 2 hands grabbing your ankles and pulling you to the edge. Making your knees hit the small couch that was standing before the bed while your chest was on the edge off the bed while Charles settled himself behind you.

He got quickly his pace back, hitting every sweet spot inside you, your pussy clenching around him making it even tighter then it was, he spanked your ass having you jolting forward. A load moan escaped your mouth when he slapped you again, harder this time

‘’please charles.. don’t stop.. I really want you’’ you whined out

At that moment he thrusted his hips into yours making sure to fill you full, before pulling out to the tip and slamming in again.

‘’fuck so tight.. ‘he breathed out. He laced his fingers through your hair, pulling it to his chest, so your chest was raised off the bed. With every thrust from charles in his new position, your hips were slamming against the bed edge, causing you pain but the feeling inside you barley even allowed you to register it in your mind.

You let a small giggle at his words ‘’you act like you didn’t like it but we both knew that was a lie’’ he pushed you back onto the bed, his hand that was in your hair was coming down to your neck, his finger slowly wrapping it around your neck as the other was grabbing your hip.

“Fuck you look so good with my dick inside you baby” he groaned

You were grabbing onto the bed so hard that your knuckles were turning white. Charles picked up his pace and with every thrust he was getting deeper than you even knew was possible.

“Ah- I’m so close-“ you breath out, your hands grabbing the sheets digging your nails into the fabric.

“I’m gonna cum” Charles moaned in your ear.

The knot in your belly grew bigger and bigger and before you knew you felt your orgasm take over you as he continued to thrust into you at a steady pace allowing you to ride out your high. Once your orgasm was complete you felt him fill you up.

“ you did amazing my cherrie”

#charles leclerc smut #formula one smut #f1 smut #f1 x reader #pierre gasly smut #carlos sainz smut #george russel smut #lando norris smut #max verstappen #max verstappen smut #formula 1 smut #daniel ricciardo smut #smut

[pocketgalaxies]

fcg: i enjoy eating silver more than copper

imogen: i am genuinely scared to meet my mom again

chet: it is well known that wood is better than metal

laudna: deep down inside, both delilah and i kind of want the shard

laudna: i don't want [the shard], fearne should have it, but i don't know anymore what's my opinion or desires or feelings or [delilah's]

imogen: i love laudna deeply, but i'm disgusted at the thought of delilah looking at us all the time

orym: i'm super lonely all the time, especially at night. doesn't matter if i'm bunking with one of you guys

fcg: sometimes i pity some of you because you have beating hearts and opportunities and you don't do enough with them

fcg: chetney you have so much love to give and it doesn't seem like you're interested in anything, in ANYTHING, other than wood. there's people out there who you could love and experiences you could share with someone else, but all you care about is wood

orym: i've always laughed it off but i guess i do kinda wonder if chetney is my dad

ashton: i am the reason that the jiana hexum robbery went fucking wrong and the reason why i got thrown out of a fucking window

ashton: (laudna: is that why you feel like you deserved to have the nobodies leave you?) yeah.

fearne: i feel like we are very ill-equipped for this job and we're gonna fail at saving the world

chet: while wood may be the superior material to metal, i do fear that with the dwindling interest in it that children will find my toys and thereby myself obsolete every year that i grow older

fcg: i think it's something buried deep down in my circuitry, but every time i hurt or kill something, it feels really good. it makes me sorta relax a little bit and some of my stress goes away

imogen: i know we're supposed to save the gods but i've tried talking to them my whole life and none of them will ever respond. i think i'm tainted. i don't know if i want to save gods that don't love me

laudna: you know we could all ripcord out of this at any moment, and i don't mean this scavenger hunt, i mean saving the world, right? andsometimesifantasizeaboutitallthetime

fearne: sometimes i do stuff to you guys while you're sleeping. not weird stuff, i just like to look at you closely and...you know, just look at you. you look so content and comfortable and i can get up and look at you really well. and maybe twiddle your hair and like braid it. nothing bad! nothing bad!!

ashton: any time it's too quiet, i start worrying that one of us, most of us, are gonna end up killing another one of us accidentally. all of us. orym...very gently, but probably–orym may be the only one i worry about the least, but genuinely everybody else. i have panicked thinking about what happens when one of you kills another one of us

orym: (laudna: do you have any strong feelings one way or another kind of being the normal guy in a group of freaks who are all ticking time bombs? are you okay with that, do you have any strong feelings?) i have all the faith in the world in you guys, all of you. and i have also spent time thinking how to neutralize each of you

fcg: i kinda worry that i put all my eggs in the changebringer basket and she might betray us all, i had a really weird conversation with her and i think she's just out for herself and she might not really care about me

imogen: fearne, i was really disappointed in you for running away from your power, you should take the shard (laudna: you should take the shard)

orym: i really miss dorian, and sometimes i think that's okay and sometimes i think it isn't

pate: [laudna] is my creator, i don't have feelings, i'm a construction

ashton: i feel fucking worse that i just fucked up fearne's life way more than mine, and i should've died instead of that happening

chet: i grew up in the bramblewood outside of westruun, and when i was a kid, i came back from learning how to make toys and found that my whole family had left. all they left behind were toys. and they ran when errevon the rimelord was running across the plains so i'm kinda afraid of dragons. and i had five siblings, alabaster, pepper, sugarplum, hermey, and chad, and i was so mad that they left, i never looked for any of them. and now i'm pretty sure they're dead, so i think that any family i have is just gonna look for a reason to leave me, that's why i don't get attached to anybody

#honesty! #was just writing these as i watched #there were a few things ppl said that i didn't include bc they felt more like part of conversation #and less like confessions that the chasm responded to #3h16m c3e79 #text #critical role #cr3 #cr lb #cr spoilers #r: bells hells #nova shh

[libraryofgage]

Life in Miniature (One)

Part of: Steve Deserves Good Parents, Actually Debbie and Fester Addams One | Two | Three Rick and Evelyn O'Connell One | Two Harley Quinn One 10th Doctor and Rose One | Two (on the way!) Scooby Gang (there are plans for this one lmao, so plz be patient with me orz) Jedediah and Octavius (from Night at the Museum) One (you're here!)

There will be more Jedtavius in the next parts I promise, I just thought this would be a funner introduction to the AU lmao

I just love those little guy dudes from the museum so much hfjdks and now we get two pairs of them

Also, fun fact, I took Steve's Roman name from, like, an actual king of Rome. The actual sixth king. He seemed like a chill dude.

Anyway, there's a meme at the end and as always, if you see any typos, no you didn't ;)

---------

When Robin took this job as a night guard, she didn't think the previous guard's words about history coming to life at night was, you know, real. She thought it was a joke, a predictable and corny joke, but a joke nonetheless.

But now, after being chased by a T-Rex, getting saved by Theodore Roosevelt, and almost being taken captive by fucking Attila the Hun, Robin thinks this job definitely isn't worth $16.50 an hour. Then again, this is the best paying job she's had in a while, and she was living a nocturnal life anyway.

Robin groans, leaning against a wall in the diorama exhibit, and slides down to the floor. She lets her head fall back against the wall, her eyes slipping shut as she slides. "This is crazy. This is insane. I need to find a fucking weapon or something," she mutters.

"Pardon me," comes a voice close to her head, "but might you be the goddess Diana?"

As pick-up lines go, it's not the worst one she's heard. And, based on what she knows of Greek and Roman deities, it wouldn't be too far off. Still, she does not want to be hit on by whatever weird historical thing is trying to flirt with her.

Robin takes a deep breath, opens her eyes, and says, "Do I look like a goddess to you?"

She looks to her left where the voice came from, blinking when her gaze falls on a figurine that would barely reach her ankle. He's dressed in a toga with a chest plate, wrist guards, a sword on his waist, and a deep purple cape over his shoulders. His hair is, honestly, the most impressive thing Robin has ever seen, made only more impressive by the golden laurels resting perfectly against his temples.

He's looking at her with wide eyes, more awed than anything else. "Yes," he says. "I have heard the gods are larger than life."

Okay. Fair.

"Why Diana, man?" Robin asks.

He tilts his head, studying her for a moment, looking her up and down. "You give me the same feeling as statues of Noble Diana with her Huntresses," he explains, pausing for a moment before adding, "A feeling of kinship, perhaps?"

Oh. This...this is like ancient Roman gaydar, right? Robin snorts and turns, resting her elbow on her knee. "I'm definitely not Diana. My name is Robin. I'm the new night guard."

His eyes brighten some, his smile growing wider and certainly charming enough to make the hearts of a few girls and guys flutter. "I am Servius Tullius, Sixth King of Rome, son of Vulcan, weapons master of the gods, and adopted son of Jedediah, Cowboy King of the Wild West, and Octavius, general of the Roman army."

Robin nods, letting all of the those words process in her head before saying, "Mind if I call you Steve? You look like a Steve."

The Sixth King of Rome blinks, looking slightly confused before his eyes light up with understanding. "Ah! A nickname! Yes, I am familiar with this concept. You may call me Steve, Lady Robin, as a show of our newfound friendship."

"Yeah, don't call me Lady Robin. Just Robin is fine," she says, hesitating before offering her hand to Steve.

"As you wish, Just Robin," he says, stepping carefully onto her hand and remaining steady as she raises him higher.

Robin blinks, frowning slightly and about to correct him again when she sees his smile and realizes it's a joke. "Okay, very funny, dingus," she says, carefully poking his side.

"Is dingus another nickname? It sounds like an insult."

"It usually is, but it's affectionate when I say it."

"Oh! Yes, like when Ockie calls Jed a philistine."

"Uh, sure," Robin says, nodding once as she lets Steve move to stand on her shoulder. He quickly sits, holding onto the collar of her jacket as she carefully stands up. "Hey, you know what I'm supposed to do about the dinosaur bones?"

"Rexy? Yes, he enjoys a game of fetch."

"Fetch. Of course."

----------

"What's going on in that head of yours, little man?"

Steve blinks, looks over at Jedediah, and raises an eyebrow at him. "I'm taller than you," he says, gesturing to the good inch he has on Jedediah.

"As long as you're my son, you're a little man."

Doing his best to not laugh, Steve nods once and points to the new diorama set up in the middle of the room. It's a circular diorama, centered on an equally circular stage divided into sections. A cacophony of noise echoes from it, clashing as each slice of the stage fights for dominance. "I'm trying to figure out what in Jupiter's name they're doing over there," he says.

"Well, most of it sounds like music," Jedediah says, "I think."

"It's not any music I've heard before," Octavius says, coming to a stop next to Jedediah and frowning at the diorama. "I would have assumed it the unholy shrieking of the damned."

"Perhaps it would be nicer if they weren't all playing at once," Steve suggests, hands on his hips as he tilts his head.

"Oh, boy, there it is," Jedediah says, his grin audible in his tone. "He's got the King Face."

"What are your intentions, my boy?" Octavius asks.

Before Steve can answer, Robin strolls into the room, grinning when she sees the raving diorama in the middle. She walks over to Steve, Jedediah, and Octavius, crouches down, and says, "Hey, guys. I see you're checking out the History of Rock display."

"History of Rock?" Steve asks.

"What in the sweet hell do rocks have to do with that mess?" Jedediah asks, gesturing to the noisy stage.

Robin rolls her eyes. "No, like, rock music. It's a genre. Anyway, it was sponsored by some musician, so it's a permanent display now."

"And they will be...playing every night?" Octavius asks.

"Probably."

Steve frowns a little more and nods, rolling his shoulders back. "If they are a permanent fixture in our hallowed hall, they must be welcomed. As Sixth King of Rome, this duty falls upon my shoulders. Fathers, I shall return shortly."

"Woah, woah, hold your horses there, little man," Jedediah says, moving to stand in front of Steve. "You're not going anywhere near that snake pit without some back up."

"A few centurions, at least," Octavius agrees.

"I will have Robin. What better protection is there?"

Jedediah and Octavius glance at each other before looking at Robin. She grins and offers them a two finger salute. "I'll guard him with my life," she says, "It's literally my job."

With that reassurance, Jedediah and Octavius move out of the way. Steve steps onto Robin's hand and settles on her shoulder with practiced ease, ignoring the nervous flutter in his stomach at greeting the new museum residents. He hopes they'll get along, but he also knows the might of his Roman army and the railroad workers can crush any who stand in their way.

Robin stops next to the diorama, tilting her head as she studies it. This close, Steve can see the bands playing on each slice of stage, the instruments and fashion shifting as his gaze travels around it. "Uh, excuse me," Robin says, raising her voice.

The raucous noise from the diorama screeches to a halt, the feedback making Robin and Steve grimace slightly. "Uh, hi. We're the official welcome crew for the Hall of Miniatures here. So, I'll need someone to represent your, like, whole display," Robin says, glancing over the bands until she finds one she recognizes. "Okay, I know you guys, so I'll be designating you the spokesband. Now, could the lead singer step forward?"

Steve watches as someone on the "Corroded Coffin" (what an odd name for a band) slice of the stage steps forward. Robin offers her hand to them, carefully lifting it away once they step on. "Great, uh, carry on, I guess. But, like, maybe play some of your quieter stuff for a bit," she says, her words barely out before the music starts up and the crowds start screaming once more.

She sighs and just walks over to the bench, letting off the person on her hand before letting Steve slide down her arm in a move they spent nearly three weeks practicing if only because they knew it would look cool.

When he hops onto the bench, Steve walks up to the other miniature, a man his age with long hair and odd clothes with tears that Robin once said were fashionable. His instrument is still slung over his shoulders, resting casually against his hips much like Steve's sword. Steve suddenly finds himself thinking that the man looks a little like a warrior. An odd one, to be sure, but a handsome one nonetheless.

He flashes his most charming smile, lets his shoulders relax, and says, "My friend here is Robin, Guardian of Brooklyn. I am Servius Tullius, Sixth King of Rome, son of Vulcan, weapons master of the gods, and adopted son of Jedediah, Cowboy King of the Wild West, and Octavius, general of the Roman army. You, however, may call me Steve."

-----

As far as Eddie was concerned, nothing mattered so long as Corroded Coffin got to keep rocking in an endless concert. The energy never waned, the set list never grew boring, and the music never stopped. He was ready to inform this welcoming crew of just that and promise Hell on Earth if they tried to disrupt the music (angry concert goers are a force of nature), when the words just died in his throat.

Because the most gorgeous man he's ever seen slides down that giant lady's arm, easily and smoothly landing on the bench. Somehow, his hair is perfectly windswept, the golden laurels glinting in the lights above them. His purple cape flutters softly as he walks closer, his toned thighs on full display with the toga hem that falls to the middle of them. There's a sword on the guy's hip, a chest plate that Eddie wants to pull off, a smile he wants to taste, and a pair of freckles right next to each other on the guy's cheek he wants to drag his tongue across.

He misses most of the introduction because he's too busy staring. He gets the important bits, though: Robin, a king, son of a god, adopted son of two dads. Eddie licks his lips nervously, a grin of his own tugging at his lips as he steps forward and playfully bows. "It's an honor to meet you, Your Majesty," he says.

It's supposed to come out joking, a little poke at the guy's authority to see if he can be riled up. It actually comes out way too genuine, and Eddie has a sudden realization that he meant it. He absolutely will accept this guy as his king, actually. He'll fall to his knees before him right now if asked, and not just because it might give him a little peek under the dude's toga.

"Please, just call me Steve. There's no need to be so formal."

Eddie bites the inside of his cheek, hoping Steve doesn't realize that the things Eddie is thinking about (the things he wants to do to and with Steve) are just about the least formal things on this earth. "Good to know," he says, relieved his voice sounds normal as he stands up straight and offers his hand. "Name's Eddie Munson, uh, lead singer of Corroded Coffin."

Steve blinks, and his smile becomes a bit more genuine as he steps closer and clasps Eddie's forearm. "A fellow leader," he says, squeezing Eddie's arm. "Welcome to our museum."

"Y-yeah," Eddie says, his arm still tingling when Steve lets go. He clears his throat, idly tugging on a few strands of hair. "So, uh, what's the deal around here? I mean, giant women...Roman kings...cowboys, it looks like."

"Our noble museum is home to Pharoah Ahkmenrah and his tablet, which brings the exhibits to life each night," Steve explains.

"There's a few rules, though," Robin says, sitting down on the bench behind Steve. "One, no getting into fights. Two, be back in your display by sunrise. Three, no leaving the museum at night."

"What? Why not?"

"We have lost good exhibits to Sol Invictus's morning rays," Steve says, frowning slightly. "So, be careful."

Eddie stares at Steve with wide eyes as he nods, amazed at the fact that Steve seems to talk like that so genuinely. And the fact that Eddie is...kinda into it. Holy shit, that's not helping with Eddie's whole "fall to his knees" thing. He wouldn't mind some good old-fashioned worship if Steve would just smile at him again.

Maybe his prayers are heard, because Steve smiles at him again. "Wonderful," he says. "Now, Eddie, could I interest you in a tour of the museum tonight?"

"Oh, you could interest me in a lot of things, sweetheart," Eddie blurts out, his mouth running faster than his brain.

He snaps his jaw shut, relieved and horrified at Steve's slightly confused expression and Robin's "I know what you are" thousand-yard stare from over his shoulder. Before he can try to backtrack, Steve snaps, understanding in his eyes. "Ah! Sweetheart is a nickname, yes? I accept your offer of friendship."

Eddie clenches his jaw, stopping himself from saying that it's more than friendships he's offering, and smiles. "Yeah. A nickname. That's all. I'm just...a nickname kinda guy. I'll probably think of more, too, Stevie. Like that."

Steve practically beams, and Eddie feels his knees go weak. "I look forward to it," he says, turning on his heel to look at Robin, who thankfully schools her expression. "Robin, this is where we leave you for the night. You have my word that Eddie will be back in place before sunrise."

"Well, you two kids have fun," she says, grinning in a way that immediately puts Eddie on edge. "I'd better not hear about any funny business, though. Absolutely no bases should be reached tonight, and you'd better not do any conquering or pillaging."

She definitely looks at Eddie when she says that last bit. Eddie stiffens, doing his best to hold back a blush when Steve glances over at his, the confusion clear on his face. "Conquering requires more planning than this, Robin. I've told you before."

"Don't worry about it, dingus. Just have fun. Here, I'll even call a ride for you," she says, winking at them before turning, holding her fingers to her mouth, and whistling sharply.

Steve walks over to Eddie right as the ground starts to shake, easily catching him around the waist before he can lose his balance. "The shaking does take some getting used to," he says, his tone full of sympathy and obliviousness to the crisis Eddie is experiencing.

When his brain finally catches up enough to ask what he's talking about, a dinosaur skeleton slides into the room, its body wiggling excitedly as it growls. Eddie jerks back, the arm around his waist tightening some. "What the fuck?!" he shouts.

"Worry not," Steve says, leaning closer. His voice is a little softer now, his breath fanning over Eddie's ear. "This is Rexy, our steed for the evening. He's very friendly."

"Friendly," Eddie mumbles, letting himself be dragged over to Rexy and placed on the dinosaur's head by Robin. "The dinosaur is friendly."

"Many of the exhibits are," Steve tells him, grinning brightly as Rexy begins moving after a pet on the snout from Robin.

Eddie looks at him, feeling blinded by Steve's smile once more, and completely forgets about the living dinosaur skeleton.

--------

Lemme know if you'd like to be added to the tag list!

(Also I know there are like one or two upcoming parent AUs that people have asked to be tagged in and I tried to see if this was one of them but couldn't find anyone for the life of me hfjdks so I'm sorry if you asked on another post and I missed you orz)

And, finally, a meme for you

#steddie #steddie fic #steve harrington #eddie munson #robin buckley #Mini Steddie #the tag for this series #steve deserves good parents actually #night at the museum #natm crossover #natm jedediah #natm octavius #jedtavius #the worship kink was a surprise to me too actually #and then i realized it was v on brand #have fun guys #there ought to be shenanigans aplenty

[victoria-grimesss]

tear you apart - part VII

masterlist

->Pairing: König x fem!reader

->Words: 2.4k *not fully proof-read*

->Warning:MDNI! Jealousy, PiV, smut, office fun once again. (another excuse to write smut)

->A/N: I have been sucked into the Baldur's Gate 3 wormhole (especially Astarion), that and school are my excuses for my long absence and neglect for this series but here is another part! I hope it’s alright!! Also this may or may not be the second to last part. I cannot decide on what to do next. 

It had been a couple months since the incident on that mission. You had recovered, of course, as you always do and König was an ever gracious healer. He did not use bandages and stitches though, he used his sweet words and expert hands to trace your image late at night to ease your pain and distract your mind. With his new-found confidence that you wouldn't shy away from his face he became a whole new kind of ravenous lover. His hands grew tighter, strokes faster and bites that lingered even longer. After your close call he gripped you as though you may die at any moment. That stands true for everyone but he could not accept that it will be your fate one day. So, he loves roughly and cares tenderly afterwards.

You find yourself recounting the night's events, skin flushing at the thought as you lace your boots for another day. 

Your training since then has been rigorous and strict, König helping you on a majority of it as your superior of course. Who would he be if he didnt make sure his team had appropriate training?

You found yourself stirring inside as you began walking towards his office. Like the drop of a rollercoaster even after all this time he still made you nervous, made you ache in the most delicious way.

There had been a good amount of new faces in base since the turn of the seasons, but you paid them no mind as you strode towards his door. You hand reaching the knob-

“Ehem.” A throat is cleared and the fog in your mind is lifted.

Your eyes meet a bright new face, sitting at the long desolate secretary desk before König’s office. You twist the knob slightly and she stands abruptly, the chair making a horrid noise across the linoleum. 

“If you need to speak with him I ask you to tell me. He’s quite busy today.”

The fire in your lower stomach is tossed with a cold bucket of water from the delay. You immediately grow irritated at her tone, but you know she's just doing her job, and you know she doesn't know your affiliation with the Colonel. So you lift your hand from the doorknob, take a breath and stand before her desk.

“Thank you.” She huffs before swiftly tucking herself back into the chair and giving you a bright smile, lined with cherry red lipstick with a hint of gloss. 

“Now, why on Earth did you almost barge into his office?”

“I have something to tell him.”

“Well by all means I’d be more than happy to relay the message.”

There’s a glint in her eyes. Now, you’re all for being a girl's girl but she’s already interrupted what could have by now been a wonderful moment of you being bent over his desk with your panties around your ankles BUT, she seems to be enjoying your irritation. 

You cross your arms,

“It’s not something I would like to tell you.”

A light amused laugh comes from her lips and she leans back a bit to get a full view of you.

“Look. The Colonel is a very important man, and I’m supposed to report anything that is meant as well as scheduling his meetings. He’s got a lot on his plate and can’t have just anyone barging into his office. But if you’d like to schedule a meeting I’d be more than happy to help”

“You seem to know alot about him.” You retort, gritting your teeth.

“A lot more than you.”

It’s like fire runs through your veins at her words. You know she only knows him surface level, but her tone alludes to more. She means to deceive you, convince you that König and her are something they’re not. To somehow win a weird power struggle that has happened during this conversation. 

But the words still hurt, König is an important man, very important. He could have anyone, even someone who can dress up in pretty skirts and not muddy boots and a uniform. You cast a glare and you open your mouth to give her a piece of your mind when the office door opens and none other than the man of the hour strides out in all his glory. 

You feel calmed looking at him, drinking him in. 

He ushers that man he was in a meeting with out and looks your way. His eyes rake over you and he strides over to the desk, papers in hand.

You don’t miss the way the other woman flushes before him, buckles under his gaze as he drops the papers haphazardly onto her desk.

“File those for me.” Tone cold and monotone.

“Yes sir. Right away.” 

His eyes are back on you and you meet them, like you’ve done a million times before.

The moment is cut.

“She tried to come into your office but I knew you were in an important meeting so I stopped her but she wouldn't tell me why she needed to speak with you.”

She rambles on, if you weren't occupying the same bed as him each night you would be quaking under his stare, the way you can smell him from here. The cologne he wears sends a wave of heat downwards like an aphrodisiac.

He raises a hand to silence her and her mouth clamps shut immediately. He sucks in a deep breath under his mask and squares his shoulders back.

“My office is open to her, I would have told her otherwise if she could not be present in there. But that is between us, it does not involve you. I expect you to remember.”

Her eyes are wide and her head tips down as she plays with the corner of the paper.

She replied quietly.

“Ah, yes. Also move my meetings for the rest of the day to tomorrow. I will be preoccupied.”

“Yes sir.” You don’t miss the defeated inflection in her tone.

König places a hand on your lower back and ushers you into his office, locking the door.

“She’s just doing her job.”

“And part of her job is to not bother you, Mein Liebling.”

He stands before you and holds your chin in his hand, looking over your face.

“What is wrong?”

“Nothing. Why do you ask.”

“Something is off, I can tell liebling.”

You sigh,

“She’s very pretty. Do you see her alot?”

“Ah. I see.” 

He chuckles.

“That doesn't make me feel any better.”

“Apologies liebling. Yes I see her daily before I enter my office. I pay her no mind, she is the same as everyone else here, no different. Except for you of course.”

He pauses and cups your cheek, you rest your head in his hand.

“You are incomparable mein Herz, meine Liebe. Any other woman pales in comparison to you, I have no desire for other women when I have you. I need not touch other women when I have mastered the art of your body, I know where to touch you to unravel you. Your sounds are the only ones I need to hear.”

You’re blushing now, cheek to cheek blushing.

He’s grinning at the sight.

“Are you convinced?”

You hum and pretend to think deeply on his question.

“I might need a little more convincing.”

His hand moves from your cheek down to your throat, tracing over the column in the center slowly as his pupils dilate.

“What man would I be if I didn't.”

He stalks around you, settling himself behind you as his hands land on your shoulders.

“You remember when you came into my office the first time? I’m sure you do, it was quite a memorable experience for the both of us.”

“I do.”

He hums a praise and one of his hands move slowly from your shoulders down your arms and squeezes, bracing you to the spot you stand.

“I was elated when you came to me. When you stood before me my mouth watered to taste you, my hands yearned to touch you, and my mind pleaded to me to undress you. I have never been so compelled by anyone like I am with you. You have made me ravenous and even after all this time I am not satiated.”

His hands move to your waist down to your hips and he pulls you back into him. You feel how hard he is, it’s painful how much you want him.

“Do you feel what you do to me liebling?”

“Fuck, yes.”

You shudder as he grinds into you, his breathing is growing harder and you can feel his chest on your back.

“Now. I heard you had something to tell me? Something very important?.” He squeezes the fat around your hips and presses himself into you and takes some small steps so you both move close and closer to his desk. You gulp and grasp onto his hand for stability but he has you tight in his hold.

You’re having trouble thinking by the way he's holding you, looking down at you.

He gives your hip a tap, whispering your name and you speak.

“I just wanted to see you.”

“See me?”

“Yes.”

It’s hardly above a whisper and you feel a bit embarrassed. Thinking now how you came down to his office and almost interrupted a meeting just to ..see him..

“Did you just come to say hello?”

Your head falls and you know he’s going to make you admit it. 

“No. I did not.”

“Then liebling please tell me why you came so I can help.”

Humor graces his voice.

“I was hoping..well, that you would..”

He leans down so he’s right next to your ear,

“Would what? Sign a document? Approve of a mission report? What my dear?”

“Fuck me. Over your desk. Again..”

He leans back and laughs,

“Feeling sentimental? It has been a while since I took you in here, unfortunately my dear it will have to be quick and dirty, can’t have you missing your training right? Unless that's exactly what you want. You want me to bend you over and fuck you until you can’t walk straight, then pull up your pants and usher you out? Yeah?”

Your head tips back and onto his chest, you meet his eyes and smile.

“Please.”

He groans at your answer and proceeds to place his large palm in between your shoulder blades and pushes until your chest meets his desk. 

You move your hips impatiently and he delivers a hard smack to your ass, causing you to cry out but you quickly bite your lip to muffle the sound.

He rubs over the skin and slowly undresses you from the waist down, pulling your pants down just enough to give him room to slide in.

“If you continue to subdue your moans I’ll stop. Do you understand?”

“Fuck, yes König.”

He palms your ass again, grinding his clothed length along your core and the friction is good but it’s not enough. It’s like taking a sip of water when you're parched.

“I want everyone to hear you okay? Let all the new recruits know just who you belong to huh?”

“Yes König, just you.”

He hums as you hear his belt buckle being undone as well at the zipper of his pants and he releases himself from his pants. He takes his length in his hand, stroking it a few times before he taps it against your entrance.

“That’s right, just me Schatz.”

He adjusts your hips and kicks your feet further apart with his boots. His gaze is heavy on where his length sits right at the entrance, hot and heavy.

Just as you open your mouth to beg he enters you fully. He’s hot within you and the stretch is as delicious as it is each time. 

He throws his head back once he’s entered to the hilt, his hands gripping onto your hips.

“Lieber Gott, so fucking tight.”

You moan loudly and you feel him throb within you at the sound. He stays still only momentarily before he pulls all the way out until just the tip remains in and pushes back in brutally. He sets a bruising pace that has your mouth drooling onto his desk, leaving a rather unsavory puddle.

“No matter how many time I fuck you it’s never enough. I don’t blame you Schatz, I fear I’m in the same predicament. I constantly need to touch you, to be near you. You are a plague on my mind.”

His words make you burn from the inside out, you drip around him and the noises in the room are loud and obvious as to what is going on. The room smells of sweat and desperation. 

He’s rough and needy and you claw at his arm that grips you

“Fuuck, Scheiße. The way you grip around me, fuck, are you going to cum? Be a good girl and soak the front of my pants?”

You’re leaving angry red marks on his arms by now, moaning and chanting his name like it’s the only word you know. He keeps one hand on your hip and the other threads its way through your hair, weaving and locking in tight. He pulls, bringing your back against his chest and this new angle has you gasping for air.

He can look over your shoulder from here and see the bulge of his length each time he thrusts all the way in. 

“I could never fuck another, you’ve ruined me and spoiled me. Soaking my cock and taking me whole, allowing your Colonel to fuck you in his office.”

“König please please.”

“Go ahead liebling.”

At his command you reach your peak, stars exploding in your vision and your body grows tense before becoming slack in his hold. He follows closely behind you, he grips you tightly as he fills you to the brim. 

A comfortable silence falls between you two as he lifts his mask and gives a long kiss to your lips then around the rest of your face as he pulls away and zips your pants before doing his own.

“You can walk alright?” You’re leaning in his arms, a blissful hum comes from your lips.

“Yes. Although I expect ample cuddle time in bed tonight, this was more than wonderful.”

He chuckles and brushes your hair into a somewhat tamable manner. 

“I can honor that request.”

You bid each other goodbye with a kiss and you give the new secretary a smile when you leave his office, obviously looking a bit more disheveled than when you entered.  

She does not look happy.

But you are. 

Tag List: @theredviolets , @saint-chlorine , @cndy-l0v3 , @notsosweetcheeks , @abbiesxox

#cod fanfic #cod mw2 #cod mwii #cod smut #könig x reader #konig fanfiction #konig x reader #konig x you #könig #könig mw2 #könig cod #könig call of duty #könig x fem reader #könig x reader smut #könig smut #könig fanfiction #König x reader smut #call of duty smut #konig #konig cod #call of duty #cod mw2 x reader #cod x reader #König x fem reader smut

[suffersinfandom]

Alright, I’m gonna talk about Ed and abuse.

“Why, V? Why are you spending your precious time on Earth typing about some dumb fandom stuff when you could be doing literally anything else?”

In short, seeing all of these “Ed is an abuser who’s inevitably going to hurt Stede” takes have been driving me absolutely bonkers since I first noticed them. They’re not going away, so I’m going to bang out an essay. 

In less-short: it’s because abuse is a serious thing and, as someone who’s experienced it, I get a little feisty when it becomes a topic of discourse in my silly pirate fandom. It’s because it’s upsetting to read meta after meta accusing an indigenous man of being an abuser. It’s because a lot of the abuse discourse in the fandom fails to separate real-life abuse from violence in a show. It’s because the vast majority of the abuse talk only acknowledges physical abuse which, while terrible, is not the only kind that hurts people and utterly destroys their lives. 

It’s because calling Ed abusive or insisting that he’s a future abuser can harm people who are like him -- people who have suffered abuse or get angry sometimes or have hurt people when they were hurt. Victims of abuse, especially those who dealt with it in childhood, often fear becoming abusers themselves. They bottle up their anger for fear of hurting someone. They hurt themselves in a misguided attempt to protect others. They don’t need to see fandom meta that enforces their fears.

And it’s because, frankly, I am unemployed and I promise I’ll stop if you give me a transcription or copyediting job, please and thank you.

Before I get into it…

I may as well come clean and say that I’m on team Ed absolutely isn’t abusive and it’s weird that people are getting that from a show that’s full of violence. 

Plenty has been typed in Ed’s defense by POC in the fandom, so I’m not going to go into how deeply unfortunate it would be to make an indigenous main character an abuser. I’m just going to say that, when you consider OFMD’s genre and attitude towards violence, it seems clear to me that you can’t call Ed abusive without calling out other characters (unless you have some kind of bias against Ed). His actions are deplorable in the real world, a bit much in OFMD’s world, deeply unhealthy, not okay by any means, and shitty and traumatizing for his crew, but they aren’t abusive.

I’m going to try to keep things polite and respectful. I’m also going to try to stick close to what the text is trying to say; I truly do want to present an honest, earnest analysis of something that I love. 

The arguments in favor of Ed as an abuser.

We can’t defend an idea without knowing what we’re arguing against (with brief counterpoints that I hope to expand on later). For this section (lol, sections, that feels pretentious and weird and I’m sorry), I’ll be lightly rephrasing things and omitting sources.

“Ed has anger management issues that disqualify him from being a romantic lead.”

Counterpoint: Ed does not have anger management issues. (Even if he did, I can think of a few very successful franchises with shitty and violent romantic leads. Ew.) He gets angry sometimes, as we all do.

“I defended Ed making Izzy eat his toe because that was a single instance and abuse is a pattern. Season two made it an explicit pattern.”

Counterpoint: First, feeding people their toes isn’t a biggie in this universe. Second, Ed fed Izzy that initial toe because he stepped out of line and demanded Blackbeard; it’s likely that additional toes were the victims of Izzy not being obedient. (I’m not saying this is right or that it’s cool to feed people body parts when they disobey, btw. I hope that doesn’t need to be said.)

“The first two episodes of season two set up the cycle of abuse so well, but the show never follows through. It doesn’t even acknowledge that it set up that storyline. If they’d wanted to end the season on a happy note without spending a lot of time fixing Ed’s relationship with the crew, they could have just made Ed’s behavior in the first two episodes less dark and abusive.”

Counterpoint: Ed’s behavior in the first two episodes isn’t abusive. It’s a bit over the top and it hurts people, yeah, but Ed’s definitely not following in his abusive father’s footsteps and systematically abusing his crew.

“Season two gives us straight up abuse. It gives us Stede, still soft around the edges, being deliberately headbutted during their reunion.”

Counterpoint: There is no abuse between Ed and Stede. The headbutt was not a case of a violent person intentionally hitting their passive partner; it was a confused, unwell, and nonverbal man reacting to the presence of someone who hurt him. Also? Stede has no problem setting boundaries or speaking out. Good for him!

“As bad as the season finale was, I’m glad the crew’s safe from Ed. Now that Izzy isn’t there to protect them, any little trigger could set Ed off and lead to him hurting them. Stede, though… Stede’s stuck with Ed and the corpse of Ed’s last victim, and it’s only a matter of time before Ed destroys him too.”

Counterpoint: This take is so far removed from the text of the show that I don’t know how to address it quickly, but here we go: Ed is not a threat to the crew after episode two, Izzy did not protect the crew from Ed’s moods, Ed does not have a hair-trigger temper, Izzy is not Ed’s victim, and -- vitally -- Stede is in absolutely no danger. Ed is not destined to be an abusive partner in season three.

And an overriding counterpoint to everything is this: Our Flag Means Death is a comedy with tons of over-the-top violence. If your theory is unrelentingly grim or looks at violence and its consequences in a real-world light, consider stepping back and remembering what genre the events of the show are happening in. If you think that only the violence committed by the indigenous lead is abuse, look at the actions of the other characters and ask yourself why Ed doesn’t get the same grace you’ve granted the others.

With that quick and dirty rundown of the arguments I’ve seen, let’s move on to the next important step in building an argument: definitions.

What is abuse in the real world?

In the real world, abuse is extremely serious and not something to be taken lightly. But what is abuse? We can’t say much about it in any world without knowing what it is in ours, so here’s a simple explanation:

Abuse “includes [a pattern of] behaviors that physically harm, intimidate, manipulate, or control a partner or otherwise force them to behave in ways they don’t want to. This can happen through physical violence, threats, emotional abuse, or financial control.” (1)

“Emotional abuse includes non-physical behaviors that are meant to control, isolate, or frighten someone. These behaviors are often more subtle and hard to identify but are just as serious as other types of abuse.” (2)

It’s important to emphasize that not all purposeful harm to another person, physical or otherwise, is abuse. “What abuse really means is control. When a truly abusive situation exists, it’s because one party is seeking to control the other through abuse.” (2)

To summarize, abuse is a pattern of behavior that involves one person intentionally harming another. That harm is meant to control, and it can take on more forms than just physical. 

That said, I’m mostly concerned with physical abuse here, as that’s the only kind that I’ve ever seen discussed in relation to Ed. Going into mental and emotional abuse will involve talking more about a specific non-Ed character and I don’t want to go there. Possibly ever.

In our world, all abuse is terrible. Vitally, our world -- and this is very important, so underline it twice if you’re taking notes -- does not operate by the rules of a pirate rom-com.

Okay, so what is abuse in the silly pirate world of Our Flag Means Death?

First, we have to understand what the show is. @piratecaptainscaptainpirates lays it out nicely:

“1. This is a rom-com.The central romance between Ed and Stede and comedy are therefore the two most core parts of the show, with Ed and Stede's romance taking priority over everything else. That's not to say OFMD doesn't have dark themes, it absolutely does; it's to say that comedy is always important to how the show is written, acted, and filmed.

“2. This is not a subtle show. That's not to say it's a simple one [...]. It's amazingly layered and emotional responses by characters are often extremely complex. However, when the show is trying to tell you something, it's not subtle and it never tries to hide it.” (3)

Did you jot that down? Our Flag Means Death is a romantic comedy with one core romantic couple, Ed and Stede, whose story takes priority over everything else. It can be dark, it can be serious, but it is, at its core, a comedy, and not a subtle one at that.

Some things are just funny and that’s it.

As a rule, the most obvious reading is going to be the one to go with. The show’s meanings aren’t hidden under layers of red herrings and subtext; if you’re compelled to bring out the conspiracy corkboard, you’re probably in too deep.

But this isn’t just a rom-com: it’s a pirate rom-com, and that comes with gratuitous violence. Here’s a short, fun list of examples of things that we can consider canon-typical pirate violence:

Tying hostages to the mast and letting them cook a bit

Wanton murder during a raid (“Note the gusto!”)

Pirate A threatening his crush at gunpoint until Pirate B gutstabs him

Whippies and yardies

Cutting off toes and feeding them to people “for a laugh”

Pirates who are madly in love stabbing and poisoning each other

Literally any violence directed at a racist (this violence is, in fact, good and encouraged)

There’s also the pirate-typical killing of other pirates. Duels don’t seem entirely unusual, and Izzy outright tries to get Stede killed at several points in season one. When Chauncey Badminton and the English navy show up after being summoned by Izzy, Stede’s life isn’t the only one on the line; the rest of the crew is also put in potentially life-threatening danger. Izzy is forgiven, so I think it’s safe to say that attempted murder is the kind of thing that pirates typically move on from. Eventually. If the attempted murderer is pathetic enough.

In short, Our Flag Means Death has a lot of violence, and very few instances of violence (looking at you, Hornigold) are treated as anything other than socially acceptable. But do you know what’s really important in the show?

Feelings.

The way characters feel as a result of something is given an immense amount of weight. All of the show’s subtleties are in the realms of the mental and the emotional, and that’s where the real pain is too. 

Nigel Badminton’s death was bad because it was emotionally and mentally devastating for Stede. Ed’s father’s murder was bad because it hurt him and forced him to create a monstrous alter ego to cope. Both of those men -- Nigel and Father Teach -- are totally acceptable casualties; their deaths would be net positives if they hadn’t had such strong impacts on our leads.

Feelings are everything in Our Flag Means Death, and the feelings of our leads are the heart of the show. That’s where the story is; that’s where the complexity and ambiguity is. 

So what is abuse in this context? The casual treatment of physical violence and the seriousness of emotional distress tell us to adjust our own moral judgments accordingly. Physical violence is everyday, straightforward, and often comedic; emotional violence is devastating and complicated. Physical violence is cartoonish and, half the time, part of a punchline. Emotional violence is real and raw and not a joking matter. Attempted murder can be shrugged off; ditching your boyfriend after experiencing a traumatic event is more complicated.

When we ask ourselves if something in OFMD is abuse, we have to consider the act in the context of a rom-com that’s all about the feelings of two guys, set against the violent backdrop of piracy, and absolutely packed with people getting maimed and murdered in casual, comedic ways. 

Awesome! Now we’re a little clearer about definitions and genre and how we should adjust our expectations! Unfortunately, we haven’t jumped into the real meat of whatever the hell this essay is…

Is Ed abusive in the context of the show?

No.

Aaaand we’re done!

Joking, joking. Obviously I’m going to pick out the examples of “abuse” that people cite and discuss each one, but first: we need to talk about Ed, violence, and anger. 

Ed is not a violent person. He’s not full of rage that’s threatening to erupt at all times, and he’s not some kind of sadist that revels in hurting people. The violence of Blackbeard is a fuckery: the theater of fear, an illusion of cruelty calculated to terrify enemies into surrendering. 

Ed has his whole thing with murder that's rooted in childhood trauma. Killing his (canonically, decidedly) abusive father to protect his mother scars him so badly that he distances himself from the situation -- blames Father Teach’s death on the Kraken -- and can’t bring himself to directly kill anyone else after that. Blackbeard orders murders and causes deaths and maims and maintains his image as a bloodthirsty murderer, but Ed doesn’t do “the big job” himself until the end of season two. When Stede’s life is in the balance, Ed can kill to protect him. 

Edward Teach kills only to protect.

But that’s killing, and we’re talking about general violence. Ed is casual about the day-to-day violence of piracy. He participates in it, incites it, and doesn’t feel bad about it. No one does! It’s part of the job! 

That leaves us with the "anger problem." Ed is frequently characterized as an angry person who lashes out when enraged, and I don’t think that canon at all supports this interpretation. Ed gets mad, yes, but his anger is always at least understandable. It isn’t a constant, simmering thing that turns him into an abusive monster when he’s triggered. He doesn't always deal with his anger (or any of his other feelings) in a good and constructive way because both of our leads lack emotional maturity, but I think it's a mistake to characterize him as an angry person.

Hopefully I can elaborate on this idea -- the idea that Ed is only violent and angry in a normal and canon-appropriate way, and anger is by no means one of his defining characteristics -- by doing a run-down of all of the times Ed is accused of being abusive or showing signs of being an abuser.

Sooooo...

Ed loses his shit on a falling snake during his nature adventure with Stede (S1E7). In this scene, he’s embarrassed about the whole treasure hunt thing and annoyed by the very existence of nature. He is not relaxed. When nature takes him by surprise by falling on him, he stabs the crap out of it in a scene that is played for comedy. There’s the important part: this is comedy. Ed is grumpy and his childish tantrum is harmless and silly. It isn’t a red flag. Overreacting while irritated isn’t an indicator that someone will be abusive.

Ed punches Izzy after the English have taken the Revenge, captured Stede, and turned Ed over to Izzy (S1E9). Honestly, I think the fact that Ed lets Izzy talk before punching him demonstrates a great deal of restraint on his part! This is justified anger and fear for Stede’s life. This also isn’t some sign that Ed hits Izzy on the regular.

In his post-pillow fort era, Ed is cleaning up his cabin when that one highly contentious Izzy scene happens (S1E10). Izzy insults Ed, tells him that he’d be better off dead than as he currently is, and says that he serves only Blackbeard (Ed better watch his fucking step). Ed reacts by grabbing Izzy by the throat and telling him to choose his next words carefully. This, in my opinion, is a valid way for a pirate captain to react to insubordination. At the very least, it doesn't tell us that Ed is Izzy's abuser; there's no indication that this isn't a one-off provocation and reaction.

Which takes us to The Toe Scene.

In real life, it would be extremely fucked up for a boss to remove an employee’s toe and make him eat it. OFMD is not real life. One episode earlier, Ed was talking about the life he was glad to leave behind -- the life where The Toe Thing was done “for a laugh.” Not as punishment, but for fun. It’s set up as something that’s gross (“yuck”), not a grave punishment. When Ed feeds Izzy his toe, he gives Izzy what be asked for: he gives him a violent captain. He gives him Blackbeard. He gives him the guy who fed people toes for fun.

But what’s important here is that Ed is not having fun. He’s having a hell of a lot less fun than Izzy is, going by their expressions in the scene. This isn’t who he wants to be, but after having the possibility of a better life snatched away, Ed throws himself back into the sure thing. He becomes the Kraken -- the captain Izzy wants, the violent monster that Ed thinks he is and tries to distance himself from, and the only thing Ed thinks he can be. It’s sad. It’s desperation, not anger and abuse.

In the second season, Ed headbutts Stede after he’s revived from his coma/death (S2E4). In the next scene, Stede is holding a cold steak to his face and calling it an accident. Roach says “that’s what they all say” -- a line that alludes to domestic violence. The thing is? It’s not, and the crew has expectations of Ed that Stede doesn’t.

Ed is freshly out of a coma (or newly alive). He’s nonverbal. His brain is, medically speaking, couscous. He still has one foot in the gravy basket. When he sees the man who left him hovering over him -- the man he loves, the man who just appeared to him as a mermaid -- he tries to say something then, when that fails, resorts to a headbutt. This is a single violent action perpetrated by a confused and hurt man who doesn’t know what to do with all of his feelings. He can't talk. He can't push Stede away.

Stede understands all of this, even if the other characters don’t. He sees the headbutt for what it is: a bit of a bitchy move. He isn’t afraid of Ed. He never is. 

Stede also isn’t afraid of Ed when he acts out later that episode (S2E4). When Ed learns that Stede went back to Mary, he excuses himself from the dinner table, smashes a chair against the wall, and knocks a vase to the ground. In this entire episode (this entire season, tbh), Ed is having intense feelings that he doesn’t know how to express or work through; the reveal that Stede returned to his wife is the final straw. He takes his tangled feelings out on an acceptable target (a chair, a vase) instead of Stede because he doesn’t want to hurt Stede.

This looks a little like displacement -- when “an unacceptable feeling or thought about a person, place or thing is redirected towards a safer target.” Displacement is an “intermediate level coping mechanism.” That is, it’s more sophisticated than the ways children deal with intense issues, but it’s still not entirely mature. In an adult, it indicates a level of emotional immaturity. (4) Ed is emotionally immature, not inherently violent. He gets overwhelmed by his feelings and lashes out -- not at a person, but at something that can’t get hurt. 

Displacement is not an indicator that someone is an abuser. It’s a coping mechanism. It’s an attempt at emotional regulation. It’s not the best coping mechanism, but it’s definitely not a sign that someone is going to go into a rage and assault people.

Stede cringes when Ed smashes the chair and sends the vase crashing to the ground, but he’s not afraid of Ed. He is never afraid of Ed because he knows that Ed isn’t a real threat to him. He cringes because sometimes that's what a person does when a loud thing happens. That's what people do when chair shrapnel starts flying. Also? It's kind of embarrassing behavior on Ed's part. They're guests enjoying a mediocre dinner! That's no way to act!

And this leaves us with the first two episodes of season two, which are an absolute mess.

Ed is fully in his Kraken era. He has no hope that Stede will return, he no longer trusts the crew, and he feels trapped in a life he absolutely doesn’t want. He thinks that he has to perform Blackbeard until death sets him free. He sobs in his cabin when no one’s looking. Publicly, Ed fades into the role of remorseless and bloodthirsty pirate captain.

Needless to say, this makes for a shit work environment. Ed works the crew too hard. He drinks and does drugs and runs everyone ragged. He’s an absolutely terrible boss, but he isn’t abusive.

That isn’t to say that the crew left on the Revenge isn’t traumatized. They are! They’ve been thrown off balance by the sudden change for the worse in someone who was their friend, and they’re traumatized by the neverending violence that the constant raids -- raids that were bloody and deadly, not the fuckeries of the past -- demanded of them. They’re traumatized by that final night in the storm when Ed did everything in his power to goad them into killing him, almost murdering everyone in the process. They’re traumatized by their own attempt at murder.

In S2E4, Blackbeard’s crew has flashbacks to the violence they perpetrated under the Kraken: Jim fighting Archie, Fang breaking a man over his knee. They’re also haunted by guilt about what they did to Ed, as evidenced by their Lady Macbeth-style scrubbing. Their own violence is a significant part of their trauma in this episode.

No, that doesn’t absolve Ed. He drove the violence -- demanded it of both the crew and himself. He hurt other people because he was hurting, and that’s terrible. 

Ed’s behavior in the first two episodes of season two is horrible, but he’s not abusive. Not all bad or violent behavior is abuse.

(We also have to ask ourselves just how bad Ed’s behavior really is. Archie, someone from the pirate world who has no idea what the Revenge was like pre-Kraken, tells Jim “that’s how these things usually go” at the height of Ed’s violence. She doesn’t act like she experienced anything out of the ordinary which is, if I may be honest, kind of worrying. But ultimately, whether or not Ed’s actions when he was at his worst are normal for pirates doesn’t matter a ton here.) 

But what about Izzy, I’m sure you’re asking!

What about Izzy indeed. Ugh. Okay, let’s just… let’s walk through the first two episodes.

One of the first things we see Ed do in season two is shoot a man. At first this seems like the show telling us that Ed is embracing the kind of violence he couldn’t manage before, but if we pay attention, we can see that he’s still following his “not a murderer on a technicality” logic. The man he shoots has a sword through his chest; he's as good as dead. He also falls offscreen before Ed shoots, making the action less impactful.

OFMD is not subtle and this is a quick way to communicate what’s going on with Ed. He’s not doing well and he’s more violent than he was last season, but he’s still himself under the Kraken’s makeup. He hasn’t done a moral one-eighty. If the show wanted us to think that Ed's a monster, they would have made him a hell of a lot more violent.

So. Izzy.

Immediately after Ed tells Izzy that he’s replaceable in S2E1, we reach the scene that people point to and say, “That’s domestic violence!” This is where Izzy breaks down because he has just been told in no uncertain terms that he’s not Blackbeard’s special little guy. That’s devastating to him, and he cries when the crew shows him kindness. 

Jim tells Izzy he’s in an unhealthy relationship with Blackbeard; Frenchie describes their relationship as “toxic.” 

A toxic relationship is “any relationship [between people who] don’t support each other, where there’s conflict and one seeks to undermine the other, where there’s competition, where there’s disrespect and a lack of cohesiveness." (5) And you know what? Yeah, Ed and Izzy definitely have a toxic relationship. Well-sussed, Frenchie! And is their relationship unhealthy? It sure is -- for both of them! But the crew is, understandably, more sympathetic towards Izzy because they’ve never been present when Izzy was hurting Ed. 

(Only tangentially related, but the crew must have really liked Ed pre-Kraken. As far as they know, the man went dark with no warning or cause. They deal with his bullshit for approximately three months (assuming one raid a day), and he has to go so far before they put an end to him. Remember when they were ready to toss Izzy overboard after, like, twelve hours under his command?)

Even though they only have one side of the Izzy and Ed story, the crew isn’t accusing Ed of domestic abuse. The term doesn’t apply to the mutually fucked-up thing that Izzy and Ed have and, beyond that, the scene is played for laughs. Jim and Frenchie use comically modern language; the whole thing feels like an intervention for a stressed-out middle manager with a shitty boss. It's funny. It's a comical thing in a comedy show.

Moving on.

Izzy returns to Ed and tells him that the crew won’t throw treasure overboard to make room for more treasure. Ed says, “And that’s another toe.” Losing a toe is the penalty for failing the captain.

Which is more likely: that Ed cut off Izzy’s other toes on a cruel whim, or that Ed cut off Izzy’s toes after other perceived failures? I’m going for option two. It’s obviously not okay to punish an underling by taking toes, but we’ve already established that toe-removal isn’t a cruel and unusual pirate punishment. It’s done “for a laugh.” 

(Specifically, toe-chopping is the cost of Izzy’s failure. Frenchie disobeys and lies to Ed in his short time as first mate and he doesn’t lose a single toe. Izzy bears the brunt of Ed’s cruelty because he’s the one who demanded it.) 

This is not who Ed wants to be, but it’s who he thinks he has to be. It’s who Izzy told him to be.

Izzy makes the mistake of invoking Stede and Ed storms above deck. He holds the crew at gunpoint, one by one, and asks them if they think that the vibes on the ship are poisonous. No one gives him a positive answer and Ed turns the gun on himself. He works himself up until Izzy interrupts and the following exchange happens:

IZZY: “The atmosphere on this ship is fucked. Everyone knows why.” ED: “Well, I don’t. Enlighten me.” IZZY: “Your feelings for Stede fucking Bo--”

 [Ed shoots Izzy in the leg. Ed steps over him on his way back to his cabin.]

ED: “Throw this shit overboard and get suited up.”

I don’t want to go into speculation about the true cause of the fucked up vibe on the Revenge (it’s clearly not just Ed’s feelings for Stede) or why, exactly, Ed shot Izzy. What’s important for this post is this: Ed's actions are not unusually cruel for a pirate captain who considers his first mate out of line. This is the kind of thing that the idea of Blackbeard that Izzy worships does to maintain his reputation.

Fang cries when Ed shoots Izzy because he knows Blackbeard. He has been with Blackbeard longer than anyone else, and this isn’t Blackbeard. Blackbeard doesn’t work his crew this hard. Blackbeard doesn’t disregard the deaths of long-time crewmates like Ivan. Blackbeard doesn’t shoot his own crew. Fang is off-balance and distraught because his captain of twenty years is acting far, far more cruel than the Blackbeard he knew.

This is not Ed as he usually is. Ed at his worst is breaking all of his past patterns. He’s behaving like a different person. His actions at this point in time are not typical of his past actions or predicative of his future actions.

When we reach S2E2, Ed is chipper. He’s cleaning up, he’s tying up loose ends, and he has decided that, no matter what, this is the day that he dies. He’s determined. First, he’ll give Izzy a crack at killing him; next is the storm, the destruction of the steering wheel, and taking increasingly desperate actions to get the crew to stop him. He tells Jim and Archie to fight to the death. He goes to blow the mast away with a cannon and doesn’t react as nameless crew members are being washed overboard. 

Ed is stopped only by Izzy’s reappearance and the violent mutiny that follows.

None of what Ed does here is abuse. This is desperate violence. This is an unwell man begging everyone around him to send him to doggy heaven.

And finally, we have the big murder party in the season finale. A surprising number of fans interpret Ed’s willingness to cut down naval officers as a sure sign that he’s gotten worse and he’s more violent than ever. This is, in my opinion, a take that completely ignores everything we know about Ed and his relationship to violence.

I said it before, but it bears repeating: Edward Teach kills only to protect. He murdered his father to protect his mother. He mows down colonists for Stede. He kills for love, and by the end of season two, he has made some kind of peace with the Kraken and his own capacity for violence.

It’s sweet. Like, it wouldn’t be sweet in the real world, but in this world? In a world where physical violence is funny more often than it’s serious? In a world full of pirate characters who all have hefty body counts? It’s growth. It’s Ed healing.

Ed is doing better. He’s not a threat to the man he loves, and now he’s not a threat to himself either.

Anyway!

No, Ed is not abusive. No, there’s no indication that Ed will become abusive in the future.

“Okay, but many abuse survivors take issue with the irresponsible message that Jenkins is subtextually sending with Ed’s story!”

That’s fine. Take issue with things. Feel whatever you want to feel, but remember that abuse survivors are not a monolith. Consider, just for a moment, that the abuse you think you see in the show is not textual. Ask yourself if Ed is truly worse than all of the other characters or if you have some bias warping your view of him. 

Finally: please keep in mind that I’m not trying to present The One True Interpretation. I’m just rolling all of my arguments and thoughts into one big ol' ball and throwing it out into the wild. You don’t have to agree with me but, if you don’t, I hope you’ll at least have a bit of a think.

If you read this and liked it, please consider validating me with a like! If you read it and didn’t like it, I’m sorry for wasting your time. If you skimmed the first part and decided to dismiss me as soon as I said I don’t think that Ed is abusive… idk, peace and love and goodbye.

#ofmd #ofmd meta #edward teach #long meta #like too fucking long #abuse #tw abuse #cw abuse #me typing things #fandom critical #kinda?

[oddballwriter]

Personal Nurses

Summary: You get sick with something and need to stay home, and so your lovely boyfriends take up the job of nursing you back to health.

Warnings: Mentions of being sick (sore throat, stuffy nose, and fever). Taking medicine. Half Google translated Spanish, my high school Spanish is really rusty the grammar may be weird. Other wise a nice wholesome sick comfort fic.

Author’s Snip: Fun fact, this was originally going to be a fic where it was about Abi (the reader and system’s daughter that have a bit of an unofficial series with) getting sick. But I decided to make it about the boys taking care of you because I got a nasty cold a while ago and wanted to see this.

Notes: Again, the grammar in Jake’s Spanish speaking might be not so good because my Spanish is rusty as hell.

I’ll shut up now. Enjoy! And don’t be afraid to request.

Word Count: 692

Being sick wasn’t that great. Sure, it got you out of needing to do things, but you also had to deal with actually being sick. And that’s never great.

You went to bed last night with a tickle in your throat and runny nose that you thought would pass in the morning, but then you woke up dying for water, barely able to breathe through your nose, and now you were burning up like a whore in church.

When Steven eventually woke up and found you in the kitchen you could tell he knew. You made an attempt to brush it off by saying “I’ll just drink some tea and sit under an air conditioner today.” but you could see Steven and the rest of them in that brain vote no on even letting you get out into your work clothes.

So now you get to wallow in bed and have three personal nurses.

Since Steven was the one who woke up with the body, so he was the one who set everything up. He politely shooed you back into bed, placed extra pillows, called your work for you, made you your tea and breakfast, and brought all that to you in bed with a cold rag and medicine. He also checked your temperature which, of course earned an “Oh, love. That’s no good.” that seemed more like him thinking out loud.

Steven was the one mostly in charge of your comfort and doing things for you when you’re sick. If you wanted an extra blanket, you got one. If your fever rag got lukewarm, he made it cool again. Do you want more water or tea? You got it. Is it too bright? He’ll draw the curtains for you. If anything he was more of a bell boy than a nurse. But it still made him blush a little when you called him that.

Marc was the one in charge of making sure you got your medicine in, and he was on top of it. Apparently, when you were taking a nap after eating breakfast, Marc took the body to go to the pharmacy and get new medicine and vitamins because “The one we have isn’t strong enough.” as if he was able to tell just by looking at you. When he came back, he had you eat some bread, saying “So that it doesn’t mess with your stomach if it's empty already.” and also “It helps it stay down. It has something to stick to.”.

“How do you know all this?” you questioned, to which Marc simply said “Trial and error,”, “Now take the vitamins. It helps your immune system fight it off.” Marc orders. You just shrug and comment “Whatever you say, Nurse Spector.”.

Jake was dead set on making food for you, making Marc go to a whole different market while he was out, just to buy ingredients for the soup he wanted to make you.

“Qué no, Marc. No puedes compras los sopas enlatadas.” Jake said to himself with a laugh. “Mind letting me in on the joke?” Marc asked as he watched Jake cut up the ingredients from the reflection in the soup. “You couldn’t buy them canned soup, Marc. Canned soup doesn’t do it. You gotta make it.” Jake explained, clearly referring to the whole ‘make it with love’ thing. “Well, that’s what we would have,” Marc mentioned. “Because that’s all we got.” Jake said back, “But not for them.” he added as to pointed to where you were resting. “They’d do the same for us.” Jake stated confidently.

When the soup was settled and done, and cooled down enough, Jake brought the bowl straight to you in bed. You thought he was going to bring a little table like Steven and Marc did, but it was clear when Jake kept holding the bowl and took up a spoonful of it and held it towards your mouth. You say his name with a scoff and he smiles. “Come on, mi amor. Steven and Marc got to play nurse today.” Jake teased. You roll your eyes and decide to humor him and let him feed you.

#moon knight #moonknight #moon knight x reader #moonknight x reader #steven grant #jake lockley #marc spector #steven grant x reader #marc spector x reader #jake lockley x reader

[aprilthebiqueen]

Some Hygiene Ideas When It Seems Hard

You aren’t alone if the act of having a shower, or brushing your teeth seems extra daunting, draining or just outright impossible. 

There are no magic fixes, but here are some tips that might be useful to you. 

Brushing Your Teeth

Brushing your teeth may seem impossible! And that’s so valid. Here’s the thing, sometimes we can ditch the regular “rules” and do what we need. Some things that help me:

Keeping a toothbrush and toothpaste in the shower. I find it so much easier to brush my teeth while I’m already in the shower with the water running. 

Brushing for 30 seconds is better than nothing! You don’t have to do the entire two minutes. 

If you can afford it, an electric toothbrush can help. 

You can brush your teeth with water! No, really. It’s better than nothing. Dampen your toothbrush with a bit of water and brush your teeth! 

Having a Shower

I don’t know about you, but having a shower is the most daunting task there is for me. It is so exhausting to even think about. Here are some ideas to make it easier. 

Prepare for the After

For me, it’s what happens after the shower that is draining. It makes it a bit easier for me to get my clothes ready, have my towel laid out, and anything else I need. 

Have Products you Love 

Having my favourite smelling body wash and shampoo is so nice, and there’s a part of me that wants to shower just to use them. 

Don’t Focus on Washing Yourself. 

This sounds weird, but hear me out a bit. Focusing on it as a task we have to do may make it more exhausting. It might sound silly, but for me, I imagine the shower is a waterfall or rain that is “washing away” some of my bad thoughts, feelings and helping me lighten the load. I focus on turning it into a calm experience. 

You can also just focus on standing in the water, and not actually washing yourself. It’s still likely to help you feel more clean!

Tips for Both Brushing Your Teeth & Showering

Call for Company

For me, sometimes I call a friend and stay on the phone with them until I actually get in the shower. This can help in the “pre shower” ritual and make it seem less intimidating. I have also kept a friend on the phone while I brushed my teeth. 

An alternative is that sometimes I find a friend who also finds the act of showering or brushing their teeth super draining, and we make a pact to do it at the same time and then we text each other when it’s time and both go do what we need to do. We then come back and text each other and tell each other “good job!” This is kind of like an accountability buddy.

Play Some Music

I find that playing music helps, especially if it’s music that makes me feel a bit pumped up.

Focus on One Step at a Time

I find the whole idea of showering and/or brushing my teeth exhausting. There are so many steps to showering between getting undressed, getting the water on, washing my hair etc... I find that sometimes it can help to just focus on one step at a time and not the whole picture. What do I need to do first? For me, I need to turn the water on because it takes a few minutes to heat up. So I’ll focus on one thing at that moment, just turning the water on. That’s all I have to do. And then I go from there and see if I can work my way through the steps without looking at the “big” picture.

Alternatives to Help Feel Clean

Some days, we just can’t do it. And that’s okay! Here are some alternatives to help you feel clean:

Wash your face

Brush your hair

Use dry shampoo

Use body lotion

Change your clothes

Get some baby wipes or other wipes to use

Have a bath! (Use a bath bomb, bubble bath, something to make it feel pampering instead of like a task. A bath is much easier to put on an audio book, or even a show to keep you occupied).

Use some mouth wash 

Remember that not being able to take care of your hygiene does not affect your worth! You are still worthy, even when you aren’t able to do the things you need/want to do. 

Check out my blog post on this topic here!

#hygiene #i write this while i feel #so drained about going to brush my teeth #well #this helps motivate me #my post

[storiesandthingsofthatnature]

Cradle Snatcher (Pt. 1)

Summary: You had told Leon that perhaps after he graduated from the police academy than maybe you would give him the time of day. You two have an age difference but it’s nothing too big. However it still weirds you out. But, with Leon Kennedy, can you really say no? 

Word Count: 2.9k

Pairing: RE2! Leon Kennedy x fem! reader (afab) Warnings: Age difference (5 year age gap), breeding kink, biting, praise kink, unprotected sex (don’t be silly~), cream pie, pre-ejaculation, dom/sub dynamics lemme know if I missed anything!  Disclaimer: MDNI!!! 18+ only! A/N: Hi there! So I’m very new to the RE fandom so please be nice to me uwu. Anyway, I’ve been reading a lot of dominant Leon and while that shit is nice I also feel like subby Leon is just as hot~ I hope that I did him justice. Like the title says this is pt. 1 so pt. 2 shall be out soon enough! :D If you like my writing be sure to think about popping up in my inbox for some requests :3c I do other fandoms so just lmk! :D I may even make a post about my rules and such, idk. If I get enough of a following :3 Alrighty! Enjoy! :D

You had told Leon that when he had graduated from the police academy then perhaps you would give him the time of day. To be honest, you just felt like a cradle snatcher. Leon was about 5 years younger than you. He was 21 when he graduated and you were 26 and already a lieutenant in RPD. You didn’t want to have a relationship get in the way of work anyway but Leon was hellbent on making you see him as more than a new subordinate.

It all started when you were just the ripe age of 21 yourself. You were called to a high school to talk about RPD and how it may be a nice career choice for the young minds of Racoon high. Leon was one of the bright eyed students that sat right in the middle, his stare never leaving your silhouette as you talked about what could be expected on the job. After class, he had stopped you to ask a few questions. You were happy with his curiosity and answered all of his questions with fervor. You were a budding rookie yourself and anyone who was interested in the same subject that you held dear was a friend automatically. 

Somehow he had wrangled your number out of you, saying that he would love to discuss further on possible internships and things of the like. It seemed like he was truly interested in policing and while that was true he was also very interested in you. Coupled with your beauty and passionate standing with justice and helping people, he couldn’t help but want to be sure that he had some way of keeping in contact with you. 

However, he didn’t make a move until he was 18 and had just graduated high school. You two had interacted a lot since the first day, Leon following your shadow for “on-the-job” training and even studying on his own when he could. On the eve of his first day at the training academy, he confessed to you about how he felt. He was a blushing mess and he ran over his words a lot but it was probably the cutest confession that you ever had the pleasure of witnessing. It was full of pure innocence and a part of you wanted to ruin it~ But you stayed strong and gently let him down. 

Again, you would feel like a cradle snatcher and while there was not that big of an age difference you still felt weird about it considering he had just graduated high school and was barely legal. But he was persistent, wanting to know the reason why. You couldn’t come up with a logical answer other than “You’re younger than me I’d feel weird.” And not wanting to lie to him you told him just that. He then started to ask if it would be because he was less experienced and that made you blush considering what that entailed. With a stutter you mutter a quick,”Maybe after you graduate.” And then quickly ran off to your office. 

You really didn’t think that he would actually wait until he graduated to try again. You were sure that he would have found some cute rookie cop girl, to your dismay, and find happiness with them. However, when he invited you over to celebrate his graduation, you should have known something was off when it was just you. But you did not say anything as you two hung out and drank in celebration. Like the good boy he was, he hadn't drunk any alcohol until he was the legal age, you introducing him to new beverages and mixes. 

After a few shots, Leon couldn’t help but try again. “Will you go on a date with me, [y/n]?” You choke on your drink, a part of you thinking that you should have seen this coming. But another had hoped that it wouldn’t happen. You cleared your throat of the froth,”Leon…” “I know what you’re going to say. That I’m too young for you but I think that’s absolute bullshit. I also know that it’s probably because I’m not all that experienced-” You sigh. “Leon, it’s not that-” “So let me prove to you that I can please you just as much, if not more, than any other guy you’ve been with. Use me.” You felt yourself go into cardiac arrest. He asked what now?! “Use…You?” Leon inched closer to you, eager to prove himself. “I can be your fuck toy.” He declared and you nearly passed out. “Leon.” His stare was stifling, filled with admiration and intent. “Please?” He asked, his fingers finding purchase on your thighs. “I know I can make you feel so good, just let me try?” He seemed to beg, his forehead coming to rest against yours. You audibly gulp. “Have you even been with anyone, Leon?” He gave a shy smile. “I’ve made out with a few girls but nothing more. Wanted to save myself for you.” He admitted and you have never felt so flattered. 

You felt your resolve slipping away. Leon was a very handsome young man. You were sure that a lot of people would love to make him happy. But for some reason he wants you and you couldn’t understand why. “Why me?” You asked, your eyes resting on his lips. You licked your own and Leon’s pupils seemed to dilate at the sight. Leon gave a small laugh. “I could count the ways but I feel like we’d be here for a while and I really want you to fall apart on my tongue right now.” You gently push at him in play,”I’m serious.” He pulled back to look at you. “If I tell you, will you let me?” He was basically asking you if he had a chance and you just couldn’t say no to those beautiful, blue eyes. 

You give in. “Fine.” You whisper and the giant smile that etched onto his face makes your heart swell. He was on you like glue, kisses eager and sloppy but you pushed him back gently. “Uh-uh, no reward until you tell me.” You gently laughed but you felt out of breath. His inexperienced kisses were enough to punch the air out of your lungs. Maybe you had it worse than you thought. He felt like whining but he kept it from bubbling out,”Your personality; from how passionate you are about your work to how motherly you are when you are amongst others that you have to look after.” He seemed to say that last bit fondly and that caught you off guard. “Motherly?” You wonder aloud and he nodded. “You handle people so well and in such a gentle way. It’s both nice and hot to see.” Well at least he was honest, you thought to yourself. 

“Hot? How so?” You muse and you could tell that he was getting a little impatient. He wanted to touch you but you were going to see how long he could last before he snapped. His blush was heavy,”Do I really have to explain that part?” You hum,”Obviously, rookie. I’m very interested.” He gave a reluctant sigh,”You acting motherly…Makes me wonder how you would act if we had kids..” He admitted softly, you having no idea that this is what your Leon was thinking of you this whole time. 

“Oh?” You ask with a glint in your eye. At first you weren’t really for this but now you were starting to get into it. Perhaps you had feelings for Leon that you hadn’t wanted to come to terms with. It’s just having him spill his heart out like this was moving and you couldn’t help the heat forming between your legs from his words. “Does my rookie want to make me a mommy?” You ask with a purr and Leon felt like he was about to explode from the embarrassment. You giggle at his reaction and cup his face in your hands to have him look at you. “Red looks nice on you.” You winked and he wanted to cup his face in his hands and groan. 

While the idea of getting pregnant was definitely not a good idea for you right now, the thought of getting knocked up after this little encounter was enough to make you think twice on logistics. Well, if you had to make a “mistake” with anyone you feel like Leon would be the ideal partner. You find your way onto his lap, his expression turning surprised as you settle yourself over him. “[Y-y/n]?” You gently quiet him with a chaste kiss. “While I would love to learn more about how you feel about me, I can’t help but get riled up by that little imagination of yours.” You say and Leon audibly gulps. You place your arms across his shoulders, crossing your forearms behind him as you lean forward to brush your lips against his. “How about it, rookie? Wanna make me a mommy?” You whisper and Leon bucked his hips up against you. 

“C…Can I?” His voice sounded hopeful, filled with pureness yet sticky with lust. You giggle and give a few languid kisses to which he shivered from. “As long as you don’t dip on me if you actually do end up getting me pregnant.” His hands found purchase on your hips, fingers digging into your skin as he said,”Never.” That was the most confident he had been all night and it made you stutter. “O..Okay. You better keep your word.” You gently joke but at the same time, hope that he truly meant what he said. You lean forward again to capture his lips with yours, Leon returning with fervor. He took your lead and found a place between your hips. He kept his hands against you like you were going to run away and you slid your fingers through his hair to massage his scalp to try and tell him otherwise. He sighed contently into your lips, hips beginning to grind against yours. “S-Sorry.” He whispered, feeling a little embarrassed by his behavior but you give a shake of your head. “No, baby, don’t be. Feel good?” You ask and he gives a fervent nod. 

“Such a good boy.” You purr and he groans from your praise, his hips picking up in pace. You let out little moans of your own, wanting Leon to know that he was being so good for you and your sounds alone were enough to nearly make him cum in his pants. He stopped grinding suddenly, brows furrowed in concentration as he tried to suppress his orgasm. “No, no no, that won’t do.” You say as you begin to grind down on him. “N-no, I’ll cum too soon.” He groaned and you hummed,”It’s not good to keep back your own pleasure. Besides, don’t you want me to see how good you look when you fall apart?” You say with a sly smile and he hid his face in the crook of your neck. “This was supposed to be the other way around….” He commented and you laughed. 

“This is going to be your first time, right? Let me show you the ropes, rookie.” You say and you saw Leon visibly shiver. Suddenly, grinding was not enough for you and you fumble with the front of his jeans. He watches bashfully as you free him from his clothed restraints, his hot cock standing proudly against his shirt. You lick your lips at the sight. “Yes, I think this will do very nicely.” You tease and it was his turn to shove at you. You giggle as you wrap your hand around the base, a nice moan emanating from the back of Leon’s throat. “Hmmmm, let’s see~” You muse as you stroke him lazily, wondering just what you should do for his first time. Suck him off? That was tempting but didn’t he say that he wanted to be used? 

“On your back, rookie.” You command and while he was a little confused he followed your instructions, you straddling his lap once more. “What are you-” “You want to be my fuck toy, right? Then be a good boy and lay there while I use your cock for my own pleasure, okay?” You say in a breathy voice and Leon was left in a stupefied state. “Yes, ma’am!” He practically squeaked out as he laid back against the cushions of the couch. You give a smile at him and begin to undo your own jeans. Slipping off both them and your panties in one go, the sight of slick connecting to the fabric made Leon’s hips buck up. 

“Look what you did to me, rookie. Such a mess, huh?” You tease once more and Leon whines. “I’ll help clean up, ma’am. P-promise.” You hum in satisfaction and settle yourself over his tip. “Just one rule, okay? No touching - This is only for my pleasure, right?” You ask with a tilt of your head and Leon bit his bottom lip as he nodded. “Good~” And you slowly sank yourself down on him. Your head was thrown back as you were filled just right. God, past partners just couldn’t compare! 

Meanwhile, Leon’s eyes had shut completely tight as a silent groan left his mouth. Fingers dug into the cushions below as you suddenly felt a hot gush of something within you. “Ohhh, baby, did you cum?” You wonder aloud and Leon wanted to die. “I-I can keep going! I p-promise-” He didn’t want to disappoint you, not like this and you shushed him with soft kisses. “Shhh, I know, my love. This pussy is just that good, huh?” You bite at his skin and heavy pants left Leon. “Mmmm, ‘s really good.” He managed to say, giving into the pleasure further now that he was sure that he hadn’t upset you. 

 Feeling a little merciful, you say,”Just let me know if it gets too much.” And you raise yourself once more, falling back down onto Leon as you feel his tip brushing the entrance of your womb. “Mmmm, such a good boy. Letting me use him like this~” You tease as you pick a rhythm that is both stimulating yet controlled. You knew that Leon was feeling oversensitive right now and if not careful you could actually hurt him and you could never do that to him. You were the one in control right now and that meant you had to be responsible. Make him feel valid even though he wants to be used like a toy. 

He was very vocal with his pleasure, groans and moans leaving his throat as he tried his best to not grab at your hips. “[Y/N], please-””Aw, what is it baby? What do you need?” You ask in a sweet, saccharine voice. “Wanna t-touch you. Can I?” His fingers scratched at the fabric beneath him, itching to cause you even more pleasure. You hum in thought, hips gyrating instead of bouncing to tease Leon even more. “I dunno. Should I?” You ask with a lilt and Leon couldn’t refrain himself from letting out a frustrated moan. At that little display you tighten your walls and move in a way that makes both of you see stars. 

“Pleasepleasepleaseplease!” Leon said in a hurry, your ego receiving a nice fluff from the sight underneath you. “Oh, alright.” As soon as you gave the go ahead, one hand found its way to your clit while the other reached underneath your shirt and bra in one go. “Ahhh, so eager~” You say with a small smile, his fingers hungry in their assault to bring you close to your own climax. “W-want to you cum on m-my cock.” Leon looked at you with blown out eyes, the once blue hue being taken over by the void of his pupils. “Yeah? Make me, rookie.” You challenge and he was happy to accept. 

 Even though his touches were that of a novice, it was still Leons’; warm, loving, seeking - it was more than enough to bring you near your orgasm. Your bounces become sloppy and you give your own whine to which Leon couldn’t help but smirk at. “Gonna cum soon.” You warn and Leon starts to meet your thrusts with his. “Mmmm, Me too.” He says with a slur,”Gonna cum in you again. Make you a mommy.” He promises against your skin as those words seemed to be what brought you completely over the edge. You let out a delicious cry of Leon’s name and coupled with the intense clamping down on his cock, Leon couldn’t stop himself from coming a second time. His hands found their way to your hips, pushing you down flush against his pelvis so that he could aim directly into your womb. 

“Such a pretty girl. MY pretty girl. Gonna be so full with my kids, fuck-” He started to babble to himself, holding you against his chest as he released inside of you. The feeling of hot cum spilling into you was far more pleasant than you thought it would be. You felt nice and marked, full with Leon and the possibility of having a little one with him. It made your heart swell. You give a small giggle and lean back, looking Leon in the eyes. “Now then, want to try to take the lead for this next one, rookie?” 

#resident evil #resident evil 2 #leon kennedy #leon s kennedy #re2 leon #leon kennedy x reader #leon s kennedy x reader #leon kennedy smut #subby!leon #sub leon kennedy