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lov1ngdrysdale · 14 hours

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perfect places ✧.* jd9

parings: jamie drysdale x fem!reader

summary: a night out leads to something you weren't expecting.

warnings: MINORS DNI !!! 18+ CONTENT BELOW THE CUT

a/n: YOU GUYS! im so sorry this took so long, prepare for a bunch of random blurbs n shit soon! thank you for being here, hope you enjoy it! 💌

jamie was an introvert, except on nights out.

he and his teammates were going to a new club, and he extended the invite to you. you and jamie had only been dating for a few short months so his invite was met with an eager "yes" from you.

in those couple of months, you'd been debating when the right time to have sex would be. jamie repeatedly told you he'd never do anything you were uncomfortable with, and sex would be off the table until you were one hundred percent certain.

after taking a shower, you spend an hour trying to get your hair to lay right. makeup was simple, just with additions of lashes and lipstick. you didn't want to draw too much attention to you and jamie, so a little black dress with black heels will do. before slipping the dress on, you walk over to the dresser, pulling out a lacey plum-colored thong and its matching bralette. tugging the dress on over your legs, you struggle with the zipper until you shimmy it all the way up.

you've spent the entire week contemplating if you were ready to give yourself to jamie, but after looking at yourself in the mirror you're certain you're ready.

to try and nonverbally send jamie a message you are ready for sex, you pull the dress down to reveal the fringes of the lace bralette.

sitting on the foot of your bed and buckling the heel's straps over your ankles, you hear jamie's signature sequence of knocks at your door. you jump up and make your way towards your apartment's entrance. you're met with the tall figure of your boyfriend holding a small, but well-arranged flower bouquet.

jamie, being the nervous sweetheart he is, awkwardly stands in your doorway.

"hi y/n i saw that your flowers were getting wilted so i just ran to...", he trails off when his eyes meet your dress, then up to your dolled-up face.

jamie gulps and clears his throat before responding, "holy shit. y/n, you look...gorgeous."

you toy with the hem on your short dress, looking up at him through your lashes, "you think so jamie?"

"of course i do...i'm just...wow you're flawless."

you laugh at jamie's lack of words and take his hand, letting him lead you to his car. like always, he opens your door and guides you inside. once he's inside, jamie begins the drive to the club. rap music plays quietly, his playlist.

jamie has a firm grip on the steering wheel and his stare is strictly on the road, like he's nervous to look at you. jamie is not the type of guy to initiate anything suggestive, so you knew you'd have to take the lead. reaching over the center console, you take his nearest hand off the steering wheel and place it onto your thigh.

jamie's face turns a shade of pink, and the streetlights illuminate the patches of freckles scattered across his complexion. you take in his appearance. his sleek black hair falls perfectly on the back of his neck, and the rest lies around his ears and forehead. his big green eyes sparkling as each car passes by. he's an angel on earth.

he snaps you out of your trance by clearing his throat and reaching to the screen, skipping a song. jamie's hand hasn't moved an inch from where you set it on your thigh, so you pick it up and move it closer to your heat. he shoots you an inquisitive glare.

"sweetheart...what's going on?" he asks softy.

you lean over across the console once more to whisper in his ear, "i need you jamie. i need you."

"are you sure y/n, i don't want to do anything unless you're ready. i'm willing to wait for you, and i don't want you to think i'm pressuring you."

returning to your original position you respond, "jamie, you've done everything but pressure me. i'm one hundred percent certain i want you", you pause, "tonight."

your emphasis on the word "tonight" sounded close to a moan, you thought it sounded weird, but jamie turned bright red.

"jamie, you can do whatever you want. i mean it."

that was all jamie needed to hear before he moved his hand away from your thigh and up your body. he grazes over your abdomen, stroking the fabric of your dress, getting closer to your chest. he cups his hand around your breasts on the outside of the dress, quickly ducking his hand inside to play with your bralette.

"so fucking gorgeous", he whines while continuing to tease you through the lace.

on the inside, you were desperately hoping he'd take your tits out of the bra to massage them, but jamie had other plans. he removes his hand, fixes your dress, and adjusts his grip to hold your jaw.

you look at your boyfriend with desperate eyes but he already knows how bad you need him. once more, you move jamie's hand back down to your inner thighs and drag it in a stroking motion, signaling you want him to rub your thigh. he does as he's instructed, placing a firm grip on your thigh caressing the smooth skin of your leg.

the night hasn't come close to an end, but your mind is already wondering about all the things jamie'll do to you tonight. there's an unfamiliar feeling that pulls you out of your thoughts. looking down you see jamie's index and middle fingers begin to hike up your dress. those same fingers used to trace soft, small circles around the lace guarding your clit.

you didn't realize how wet you were simply from jamie's delicate touch until he spoke up.

"you're so desperate my angel...so wet already."

his words make you groan, throwing your head back to hit the headrest. your eyes are squeezed shut due to the pleasure of jamie's fingers, and you hardly realize he's pulled up to the club's valet.

jamie removes his fingers and fixes your dress, "sorry angel, we still have a long night ahead. you'll just have to wait."

his lips curve into a mocking smirk, he knows what he's doing to you.

jamie presses a gentle kiss to your temple and steps out of the car, handing the keys to the valet driver before helping you out. he takes your hand and guides you into the club. his navy blue polo shirt fits him flawlessly, and his grey pants hug his toned thighs. you can't help but think about him taking it all off.

one of the perks of dating a professional athlete is that they can get a table anywhere, and everywhere. it's exactly what they did tonight. checking his phone to see if his friends are here, you follow him to a corner of the club where they all sit. you and jamie scoot into the circular booth with his teammates and their partners.

"wow y/n, you look smokin' ", says one of the wives.

you laugh, roll your eyes, and swat in her direction. her comment earned you the nickname "smokin' " around the other wags for the remainder of the night.

everyone at the table shares some drinks and conversation before you decide you're comfortable enough to dance. jamie's enthralled in a conversation with his friends, it sounds like they're making fun of cam. to try and get his attention you rest your hand high on his thigh, squeezing it firmly. you didn't think it'd be as hot as it was. his eyes shoot straight to yours after the first squeeze, and with furrowed brows he asks you, "what's up doll?"

you give him a tipsy smile before grabbing his hand, practically yanking him out of the booth, "jamie! let's go dance! come on jamie!"

he can't say no to you, so without hesitation jamie's being whirled away to the dance floor by his tipsy girlfriend.

you face jamie, draping your hands around his neck and his firmly around your waist. he guides your hips side to side on beat with the song, holding you close. you take in his signature cologne, bleu de chanel.

jamie looks absolutely enchanting, his light skin being hit with the colorful strobe lights. he dips his head down to your height and says, "turn around, angel."

you do as you're told, swiftly turning and pressing your ass into jamie's crotch. as a new upbeat song plays, you begin to rock your hips. jamie places one hand firmly on your hip, the other up towards your chest--right under your tit. he holds you tight to his body as if you'd run away if he let go.

getting the urge to tease jamie you start to grind against him, catching him off-guard. how could his sweet angel be so dirty?

he dips his head down to your height once more, this time placing a soft nibble on your ear.

"what're you doing y/n?"

turning to face him you respond with an innocent "just dancing babe."

the grinding didn't last long before jamie whipped you around to face him again, "we're leaving."

you can see the lust and thrill in his eyes as you both exchange goodbyes with everyone before he practically yanks you out the door.

waiting for the valet, you eagerly shift from one foot to the other. jamie snakes his arm around your waist and places a soft kiss on your forehead. his sweet gesture, yet demanding manner is confusing you. the car arrives and jamie hands the man a ten dollar bill, thanking him.

he's quick to get you in the car, making sure you're settled in before shutting the door. he jogs to the driver's side, swiftly turning the car on and switching gears. he desperately needed to be in bed with you.

you take jamie's phone and play some of your own music, "perfect places" by lorde happening to come on shuffle. as jamie drives through the city he sneaks glances at you, biting on his cheek.

jamie's so focused on getting you home, he hardly notices you propped up on the center console. you're quick to move your hand down to his crotch, palming him through his pants. in a few seconds, jamie's already groaning and breathing heavily. continuing to palm him, you leave soft kisses on his neck and cheek. jamie continuously shifts in his seat trying to position himself most satisfyingly.

"what's wrong baby? does it not feel good?" you teasingly ask.

"move", he bluntly responds pushing you off him.

you're taken back by his actions but realize his urgency. jamie is looking over his shoulder and turning on his right blinker, finding the nearest exit.

"jamie what're you-"

"I can't wait. need you now." he speeds off to a side road and into the closest empty parking lot. the building was deserted, every light out.

jamie parks the car, eagerly takes off his seatbelt, and sternly commands you to the backseat.

you jump between the console and make your way into the backseat, while he opens the driver's door getting into the back. it takes no time before jamie is cradling your head with one hand and guiding you down onto your back. his tenderness is strikingly contrasted by the hunger in his kiss. his kisses are sloppy, as his hands roam your body. he moves down to your thighs, scooting your dress up.

"look so fucking gorgeous my angel, such pretty legs", he growls in your ear as he smooths his hands over your lower half. he lifts up your right leg, placing kisses along it.

jamie moves to connect his mouth with your neck, sucking harshly. you wince and moan when he nips at the skin with his teeth. the bulge in his pants rubs against your body as he continues his attack on your neck. with one quick motion, jamie removes his shirt revealing his toned chest which makes you whine.

after leaving a few marks on your neck his kisses move lower, lips making contact with your chest.

jamie tilts his head upward to find your eyes, "are you ready y/n? if you're having any second thoughts tell me and we can stop, i promise."

you smile at him and stroke his hair before responding. "i'm ready jamie, promise."

jamie presses a gentle kiss to your skin before reaching up to pull on the straps of your dress. "take this off doll."

doings as you're told, you hinge slightly to remove the dress. jamie's eyes go wide at the plum bralette.

"is this...is it for me?" he asks with a small stutter.

"who else would it be for?" you shoot him a playful wink that makes him chuckle.

"can i take it off you?"

"yes, please", you sound so needy but jamie finds it arousing.

once again you sit up halfway to let jamie unclasp the bralette, which he does with ease. seems like he's been practicing.

without letting you prepare, jamie's attaching himself to your breast, flicking your nipple with his tongue. he moves his opposite hand up to massage your other boob. his sounds and movements are electrifying, making you arch your back and moan his name.

after a few minutes of jamie giving your tits his attention, you needed more. you softly nudge jamie's head down, signaling him to move towards your pussy.

as instructed, jamie moves to position himself in line with your dripping core. "you ready angel? just tell me to stop and i will."

"i'm ready jamie", you moan.

jamie hooks two fingers around the lace panties you're wearing. he pulls them off you with ease and takes those same fingers to your entrance. he glazes over your soaked folds, slowly moving to your clit. his fingers toy with your clit for a moment, making you buck your hips and whine. jamie presses an occasional kiss to your thigh just to hear you moan.

"please jamie", you mewl, "need you now, so bad."

without objection he's up on his knees unbuckling his belt. in swift motions jamie unzips his pants and lowers them along with his underwear. his length springs up towards his abdomen, already leaking with pre-cum. jamie reaches into his back pocket, grabs his wallet, and unravels a condom package. he stretches it out and glides it onto his dick. he takes his dick into his hand and begins to rub the tip inside your drenched pussy. you both groan and you lift your hips off the seat for more pressure.

after rubbing his dick inside you for a few short seconds he says, "remember angel, if you need me to stop just say stop. i'll pull out immediately."

you nod shyly and begin to brace yourself for jamie's dick. he slowly pushes himself into your entrance, allowing you time to adjust to his size. you wince and inhale sharply which cuases jamie to look at you with a worried expression.

"i'm okay jam, promise. keep going."

with that, jamie continues to guide himself into you until he's fully inside. he begins a steady pace of moving back and forth, still letting you get used to him.

"faster jamie, please", you mutter and he does as you tell him.

he thrusts into you with stealth, causing you to become a moaning mess. the car fills with your moans and curses, jamie's soft grunts, and your playlist continuing quietly.

"so good beautiful, doing so good for me", jamie leans down and mumbles in your ear.

his hands rest on either side of your thighs, gripping tightly for support. his fingerprints are sure to leave a mark tomorrow.

jamie's movements are rough, yet so tender. small beads of sweat begin to form on his hairline and his chest begins to heave as he tries to maintain composure.

he lessens his grip on one of your thighs, beginning to rub your clit again. you moan his name, loudly. jamie throws his head back at your noises, and the feeling of his throbbing dick wrapped around your tight walls.

"fuck jamie, so close. so fucking close", you cry out to him.

"right there angel, just a little more."

jamie's encouragement helps you hold out for a little longer. it doesn't take much time before you begin to feel the swell in your lower stomach, making you antsy, "jamie gonna cum."

he's still rubbing your clit and quickening his pace inside you, "cum for me y/n, please."

the two of you let go, and you cum around his hard length. jamie's thrusts get sloppy as you let out guttural moans and screams for him.

he moans your name and slows down before gently pulling out of you. letting you catch your breath, jamie rustles around the backseat, through his practice bags to find a shirt to help clean you up. just his luck, he'd found two. he uses one to help clean you up, and hands you the other to put on instead of the dress.

once you both have come down from your orgasms and cleaned up, he sits back into the seat and pulls you into him. he moves the hair that's stuck to your face from sweat and kisses your head.

"I love you so much jamie", you let out not realizing what you've said.

trying to remain calm jamie responds, "i love you more y/n", but on the inside his stomach is doing flips and his heart is trying to fly away.

after a few moments of silence, jamie suggests, "should we go to my place and watch a show? i don't want to fall asleep without you tonight."

you smile widely and respond, "of course, as long as you make me coffee in the morning."

jamie laughs at you and pulls you close for a kiss. his lips are plump and sweet as he presses onto yours. he helps you back into the passenger's seat, then he gets settled back into his.

in his hand are your lace panties, "can i keep these?" he asks.

you hadn't even realized he stole them after removing them from you. "jamie, oh my gosh when did you steal those?"

"answer the question", he demands.

"...yes", you mutter under your breath.

jamie makes an excited cheer before tucking them into his pocket.

you didn't imagine having sex with jamie for the first time in the backseat of his car, but it was worth it.

#lov1ngdrysdale #hockey fanfiction #jamie drysdale #jamie drysdale x you #jamie drysdale x reader #philidelphia flyers #flyers hockey #nhl players #luke hughes #jack hughes #trevor zegras #anaheim ducks #ducks hockey #hockey oneshot

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toasttt11 · 2 days

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missed you

May 18, 2022

Livia rubbed her eyes leaning her head off the glass of the plane window. She was heading back home after the Stars had gotten out of the playoffs during game seven.

She was excited to be home and she did just get to see her parents and brother as they came out to see a few of her playoffs games but she was most exicted to see her best friend Wyatt, as she hasn’t seen him since she played in Toronto in March but that was the only time she saw him since she left for Dallas in September. It’s the longest they have ever went of not seeing each other.

Livia had seen Luke in January when she played the red wings but she only saw him that once since August.

Livia also hasn’t seen her two best friends together and the three all being together in a long time and she truly misses the days she saw them everyday and spent all day together, she misses her boys and facetime can only do so much.

Livia stood up as the plane as landed and threw on her back pack and purse and grabbed her suitcase from the overhead and walked down the aisle of the plane.

She had a hoodie on and a hat so no one was recognizing her, while she does love the fans but she’s not the biggest social person so it’s not something she loves all the time.

Livia walked through the airport and to the pick up lot where her parents told her they would be. She looked over and her mouth dropped in shock as she realized they weren’t here to pick her up but Wyatt was.

“Livy!” Wyatt grinned widely seeing his best friend and the girl he’s been in love with since the first day of kindergarten.

Livia let out a giggle and hurried over to him she dropped her suitcase handle and quickly wrapped her arms around his neck tightly. Wyatt’s hands automatically wrapped around her and spun them around both of them laughing happily.

Wyatt gently set her back down on the floor and she looked up through her lashes and Wyatt was just in awe, he has always known she’s absolutely beautiful but she seems to get more beautiful every time he sees her.

“Hi.” Livia beamed at her best happily, her nose scrunching from her smile being so wide.

“Hi.” Wyatt happily chuckled out just staring at her with a large smile.

Wyatt gently pulled her into another hug, “I missed you Livy.” Wyatt whispered softly resting his chin on her shoulder and closing his eyes.

Wyatt hated this season and hated playing hockey with out his best friend and it was so odd to play on not be on the ice with Livia, he couldn’t wait till he joined her in Dallas and they get to play together again.

“I missed you too.” Livia softly whispered back, She had missed Luke terribly when he moved away and stopped playing with Wyatt and her but not playing with Wyatt was like playing with out a hand and she hated how there was always a void where she wanted Wyatt to be, she didn’t understand why she misses Wyatt more than she does Luke.

“Come on, let’s get you home Livy.” Wyatt smile couldn’t have left his face since he saw her. He threw his arm around her shoulder and grabbed her suitcase. Livia smiled happily leaned her head on his shoulder as they walked and Wyatt leaned down pressing a soft kiss of the top of her head that’s covered from her hoodie.

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hearts4hughes · 14 hours

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Jamie Drysdale

28. "Oh, so they are just a friend, right? That's what you're telling me?"

jamie drysdale x fem!reader | request post

you slammed the door as you stormed into the apartment. “woah why are we slamming doors?” trevor asked, completely dumbfounded as he stood in the kitchen.

your eyes sent him daggers as you stomped past him. jamie almost immediately emerged from the door behind you, hot on your trail. with furrowed brows, trevor greeted his friend— which was ignored.

“y/n, we aren’t done talking.” jamie’s voice was sharp.

“yeah,” you chuckle sarcastically, “well i am.”

you began your way into jamie’s bathroom when his hand grabbed your wrist, halting your movements. “let go.” you demanded.

“no.” he was stubborn— almost as stubborn as you. “i don’t know why you won’t just talk to me.”

you huffed as your hands curled into fists besides your body. “because you are speaking out of jealousy, and i’m not entertaining that.”

“jealousy? it’s not jealousy, sweetheart. it’s facts.” he retorts. “i walk away for one minute and that guy swoops in and tries to pretend you’re his girlfriend.”

“you’re being so dramatic!” you raise your voice. “he’s just a friend.”

you tug your wrist away from his hand and cross your arms over your chest.

while at a bar, jamie left your side to go to the bathroom. when he came back from the bathroom there was a man by your side, laughing with you and— according to jamie— being very touchy with you. to say that jamie was mad was an understatement, but you repeatedly reassured him that the man was merely an old friend from college. jamie was too stubborn, however, and decided to stick to his own narrative.

“oh, so he’s just a friend, right? that’s what you’re telling me?” his belittling voice was enough to cause tears to flood your waterline. “fucking bullshit.” he muttered.

“listen, if you can’t trust your own girlfriend of two years, then maybe we need a break.” you spat. your voice cracked towards the end. you felt like a little girl yelling at an adult.

suddenly, the air felt heavier. tears fell in streams down your cheeks like a river of sorrow. jamie’s features softened but the fire in his eyes only intensified.

“yeah, maybe that’s what we need.”

#nora’s writings 💐#jamie drysdale #jamie drysdale x reader #jamie drysdale blurb #jamie drysdale imagine #anaheim ducks

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qrrieterisunnq · 2 days

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𝐑𝐄𝐙'𝐒 𝟐𝟎𝟎 𝐅𝐎𝐋𝐋𝐎𝐖𝐄𝐑𝐒 𝐂𝐄𝐋𝐄𝐁𝐑𝐀𝐓𝐈𝐎𝐍

Hello my loves!! Welcome to 200 followers celebration!

I want to thank all of you for the support and love you spread here! When I first started writing here, I didn't know I'd reach this many followers only in a matter of a few months!

I'm so glad I'm able to be part of this amazing hockey community! The first month, I was here just for to read about Jack and Trevor. But I always loved writing, so I decided to write here! This is such a safe place for me and I hope even for you. I have a few changes I wanna do. Since I'm a plus-size girl and I know how the world is hard on us sometimes, I want to start writing some fics with plus-size!reader, so I hope you'll like them!

This celebration will be open in two days at 10AM EST on April 19 and will run for 96 hours (closing on April 22). You’ll find below all of the requests I'm accepting, and the players that I write for so please stick to them and only them. You can request as many as you want, there's no limit on it! I can’t wait to see what you all come up with. I love you all <33

players I write for: Jack Hughes, Luke Hughes, Quinn Hughes, Nico Hischier, Trevor Zergas, John Marino, Dawson Mercer

🎞 Choose a player and song and I'll write you a blurb based on it (Below the divider are 20 of my favorite songs for which I will write!)

🌷 Choose a player and situation and I'll make you a mood board based on it

💋 Let's play a game; kiss, marry, fuck - choose three players and I'll tell you who I'd kiss, marry or fuck and why

🌱 Let's get to know each other. Tell me something about you, and in return I'll tell you something about me

🍸 Ask me a question and I answer or write me some unpopular/popular opinion and I tell you what I think of it

𝐇𝐀𝐑𝐑𝐘 𝐒𝐓𝐘𝐋𝐄𝐒

Keep driving

Grape Juice

Sweet creature

𝐓𝐀𝐘𝐋𝐎𝐑 𝐒𝐖𝐈𝐅𝐓

Bad blood

Cruel summer

You belong with me

𝐓𝐀𝐓𝐄 𝐌𝐂𝐑𝐀𝐄

You broke me first

Guilty conscience

𝐎𝐍𝐄 𝐃𝐈𝐑𝐄𝐂𝐓𝐈𝐎𝐍

Illusion

Night changes

Through the dark

𝐉𝐀𝐂𝐊 𝐇𝐀𝐑𝐋𝐎𝐖

Loving on me

𝐁𝐑𝐔𝐍𝐎 𝐌𝐀𝐑𝐒

Just the way you are

Talking to the moon

𝐒𝐇𝐀𝐖𝐍 𝐌𝐄𝐍𝐃𝐄𝐒

Treat you better

𝐉𝐔𝐒𝐓𝐈𝐍 𝐁𝐈𝐄𝐁𝐄𝐑

Intentions

Yummy

Beauty and a beat

𝐋𝐀𝐍𝐀 𝐃𝐄𝐋 𝐑𝐀𝐘

Radio

Young and beautiful

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savagegood · 2 months

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he’s so valid for this

#one of us #ONE OF US!#rahul kohli #anaheim ducks #hockey #nhl

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giganticism · 2 months

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Trevor Zegras holding Mason McTavish’s hand after accidentally blocking him from getting fist bumps from fans.

#mason mctavish #trevor zegras #mason and trevor #anaheim ducks

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angelwithdemonictendencies · 3 months

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all my life i've been frozen, forgive me if i wince at your warmth; kiss my blue lips and say the frost brings out my eyes.

jd6 x reader: maybe roommates wasn't the best idea (sugar pt. 2).

(warnings: blasphemous filth (we're back, and this is a good one), unprotected penetrative sex (m on f), oral sex (f on m), hair pulling and spit and all my usual stuff (you guys know. legs and lips and all that nonsense). lots of whining and whimpering from the ducks defenseman with the giant traps. descriptions of general insecurity (but of course!). know yourself and your limits, please don't read if you're not 100% sure).

(a/n: alright, my favorites. here you have it, the promised continuation of my jd6 sugar piece from halloween (so please read that here first so this makes sense)! and yes, it's long (11.1k), so thank you, as always, for your support and kindness and patience and gentleness. congratulations to jd6 for his return to the big leagues. this is his prize, i'm sure he'll be thrilled. it appears it's impossible for me to write a story without using tz11 as a comedic side character. obviously there is nothing realistic about this, such is the upside of fictitious writing. can you tell i had an idea for like two scenes and then filled in all the blanks? (been wanting to write gaming chair head for a million years). if you relate to the more serious insecurities addressed within this story, know i'm here for you. please believe that it is so utterly and completely fathomable that people are and will be attracted to and interested in you! anyways, please let me know what you think (and who/what you want next)! go canucks (and all-star qh43). until next time, all my love).

it had taken little convincing on either side for jamie to move in with you. it was sort of funny, how not so long ago, it had been only you in your apartment, and now he was there, too, evidence of him all around.

a few months in, you had almost forgotten what the fridge looked like without his recovery drinks lining the shelves, what the living room smelled like without his favorite candle burning, what the mudroom looked like without his shoes and bags littered around the door.

you had grown accustomed to him, in his entirety, and the more he revealed about himself, the more trouble you had remembering what this place had been like without him.

it seemed so crucially important that you knew about his culinary endeavors (he was trying ever so hard to branch out beyond chicken and rice). it seemed of the utmost significance that you understood all of his favorites of everything, and that he knew all of yours in return. because if you didn't, one of you might bring home a flavor of ice cream the other didn't like, or flowers the other didn't like the color of, or something like that.

and if he didn't know the names of your favorite movies, how would he be able to talk to you about them? and if you didn't have a little bit of a grasp on the gaming world, how could you keep up when he rambled on about it?

you told yourself it was only polite that you knew about his interests, and his family, and his friends, and his dreams. that he was only being polite when he asked about all of yours.

you were sort of shocked at how quickly he had made his presence known within your routine. his schedule merged with yours on the calendar attached to the fridge. his friends came over to play video games, yours to watch movies.

you were proud of yourself for how you had handled his moving in, really, but you'd be lying if you said he didn't have an effect on you. he was the same blushing, stuttering, beautiful boy who had dropped that plant in your doorway, after all.

and you were acutely aware of the effect he had on you, from that very first day. he didn't seem to let you forget it, like the night, a few days into your new arrangement, when you went into the kitchen around midnight to get a glass of water.

something you had done, time and time again, almost every night, alone. so you were startled, to say the least, when you felt a figure behind you. you whipped around, your heartbeat elevated, thudding in your chest, in your neck.

you placed a hand over your heart to still yourself when you recognized that shaggy dark hair, square face, broad build.

"fuck, jamie," you practically whispered, your voice tense, "you scared me." you made to pour him a glass of water, willed your body to emerge from danger mode.

"'m sorry, petal," he murmured, and his tone alone could have set your body ablaze, rumbling through you like an earthquake. "didn't mean to." apology thickened his words like cornstarch.

"'s okay," you said as you passed him the glass, took a sip from your own.

if it was light you would have seen his eyes track the motion, how his gaze seemed to get stuck on your lips around the rim of your glass.

there was something very heavy about sharing this space with him, especially now, in the cover of the night. you felt freer, almost indulgent, in taking him in. less guilty in your secret wanting. suddenly your brow furrowed in concern. "did i wake you up?"

he shrugged, took a sip of his water, which made your swallow shaky. "walls are thin," he rasped. "just wanted to make sure you were okay."

your exhale was shallow as you took in his words. this exchange in the dark was too dangerous, too much. you made to go back to your room, stopping to place a wanting palm on his corded shoulder as you passed him. you felt him flex instinctively under your touch, suddenly wanted, simultaneously, to be anywhere but here and to never leave. "thanks for checking on me, jamie," you whispered. it seemed to have been so long since someone had done that.

there was a pause full of uncertainty. "'course," he replied, rough and rolling.

you were so, so, close, and such a predicament could have ignited the foundation of the building in all of its seriousness.

that exchange, so early on in knowing him, nonetheless had you promising yourself that you wouldn't let your relationship with jamie grow beyond anything besides roommates. just roommates, you said, and that's it. anything past that boundary was too dangerous, too charged, too soaked in meaning and feeling and wanting.

but such a promise was proving hard to keep, even months later. because as comfortable as you had grown to each other, there was something so deliriously uncomfortable about being so close to each other, so ridiculously entwined in each others' days, and yet not touching, not indulging the desire you both so felt. so scared to look desperate, to be caught red handed in want, even if that was exactly true.

regardless, such a promise was proving hard to keep, especially on days like today.

you were sitting at the kitchen counter, one leg pulled up to your chest as you sat on a stool. you still worked at the same coffee shop, and you still loved it, but you had picked up some copywriting jobs here and there, too.

naturally, you looked up when you sensed another figure enter the room. your gaze caught on a very sleepy jamie with a very sleepy smile.

"morning," he said, his voice rough and raspy with remnants of night.

you felt your mouth tick upwards in response to his presence. "morning, jamie," you replied, shifting on your stool, willing jittery attraction out of your voice, out of your head. there was no space for that here, you told yourself. you cleared your throat as he made himself a cup of tea. "doing anything fun today?"

he turned to you, leaned his frame back against the counter, a movement so comfortable it made you blush. he hummed, thinking, before meeting your eyes. "nothing out of the routine," he mused, his gaze on you making you feel his attention in your feet, in the tips of your fingers. "when're you working? maybe i'll swing by."

your chest thumped at the thought of him taking time to come see you, even though that wasn't necessarily rare anymore. he visited your coffee shop at least once a week, but the sentiment of it all wasn't lost on you. the preciosity of someone deeming you worthy of a drive, however short.

you leaned on your clasped hands, scrunched up your nose in gentle pleasantry. "two to close, today," you told him, "but you don't have to come."

his eyes softened ever so slightly, his expression all maple syrup and pancakes on a lazy sunday morning. "want to, petal," he told you, taking his mug and starting back towards his room. "give me something to look forward to, eh?"

you were glad to hear his door swing shut behind him, if only so that he didn't see your face scrunch up further in guilty delight, at being his something to look forward to.

if jamie had settled into being your roommate, your favorite coworker had not settled into that fact. or maybe she had settled in, but it didn't appear that she would be giving you or him a break anytime soon.

it had only been a couple of months, and she had yet to go a day without bringing him up, nevermind going a visit without saying something you were sure would embarrass him.

as promised, after his workout and skate, the bell above the door jingled. you swore the sound was louder, more jubilant when he opened the door than any other patron.

he's here, the bell seemed to sing, finally, finally, he's here! you fought the urge to shush the inanimate object.

"well, well, well," your coworker said, wiping down the counter, "honestly, 6, i'm shocked you had any time to stop by, given your packed schedule of not shooting the puck."

you shook your head at her. "don't be mean, lovely," you chastised. you locked eyes with jamie, molten chocolate and stained glass. "i'm sure you shoot just enough."

his returning grin was carefully confident. "right as always," he told your coworker, "if we had a coaching opening i'd put in a good word."

this quickly spurred your coworker into a heated rant about how poorly the coach of the ducks was handling his roster full of young talent.

you began the process of making his drink, the one he insisted on ever since that first day. he had told you before that nothing could possibly be better than your fall themed treat. as you shook the maple syrup and espresso with ice, you missed the way a flush dusted across the bridge of his nose, like a day out in the sun.

your coworker did not miss this, however. she smirked, tilted her head. "a bit hot in here, drysdale? you look a little flushed."

he shot her a look, one which she mimicked before you turned to hand him his drink.

"here you are," you said as his hand closed over yours around the to-go cup.

your mind sparked and sputtered at the feeling of his warm hand over your fingers. he could have grabbed under your hand, the hopeless romantic in your head screeched. he could have avoided your touch, but he didn't!

but you had long ago resigned to refusing to listen to the hopeless romantic, in all of her desperate and shameful loveliness. you couldn't trust her, you had learned. she only ever left you feeling lost and longing.

so you silenced her, ignored her big, teary eyes as you dismissed her for the thousandth time, pulled your hand away.

"thank you, petal," he said, so genuine and sweet, so exactly him. it seemed cruel that you still weren't used to him, to his kindness, that he was still evoking this kind of response from you.

your only solace was that he didn't seem to be finding it especially easy, either, if his flickering gaze or flexing hands were anything to go by.

"you're welcome," you replied. "headed home now?"

he hummed in affirmation, rocked back on his heels. "when will you be home?"

you could have sighed at just how domestic it all was, like some kind of sixties fantasy. honey, i'm home! echoed in your head.

but you shut that down as quickly as it appeared. "why?" you asked, raising an eyebrow, "expecting company, or something?" your mouth quirked. "maybe a girl?"

he paled, and you were surprised at your nerve, too. you didn't really know why you were doing this, why you would ask. you and jamie didn't have that kind of relationship, and why would you ask that anyway, when you knew for a fact one of the possible two answers would cut through you like a warm knife through butter?

thankfully, your coworker broke the tension with an exaggerated laugh, actually slapping the counter before looking up and clocking both of the confused looks turned her way. "oh," she said, looking between the two of you, "was that not a joke?" she nodded. "alright then, my bad."

jamie gave a short shake of his head as if mentally moving on. "no one's coming over," he said to you, "just wanted to know when i should make dinner."

in a cartoon, your heart would have beat out of your chest, through your shirt and folded apron. "i'll be back at seven," you told him. "i'll see you then?"

his smile warmed the room. "see you then, petal."

the bell rang, this time dreary and disappointed, as the door shut behind him.

your coworker immediately turned to you, eyes teasing and playful.

"if you're gonna say something, lovely, just say it," you prompted, taking out the closing checklist.

she was practically buzzing on her feet. "tell me you've given up on your no fraternizing with roommates rule," she begged, clasping her hands for emphasis. "tell me you realize how obvious you're both being."

you waved her off, shook your head. "the rule is there because it's important," you chided, "and there's no way he's into me like i'm into him." a line you had used about almost every guy you had liked, repeated so many times in your head it was practically a hymn.

she folded her arms in front of her chest, rolled her eyes. "when you're ready to come to terms with people finding you attractive and interesting and wonderful, as you are, let me know," she called out over her shoulder as she went on her smoke break.

her words stayed with you, though, because they were meaningful. it was hard for you, dreadfully so, to even fathom that someone could find you worthy of their time, their energy, their attention.

even when you were actively flirting with people, acting confident, like you were that first day when jamie walked into your coffee shop, it felt as false, as foreign, as theatrical as shakespeare in the park.

why was it so easy for you to give all of that to others, why did you want to give it to them so desperately? why did it feel like such an impossible ask for someone to give that to you?

her words were burrowing in the back of your mind as you locked the front door of your apartment behind you, breathed in a delicious smell, maybe rosemary? thyme?

you let yourself drift into the kitchen, were met with a freshly showered jamie in pajama pants and an old ohl t-shirt. he stood over the stovetop, humming something, before turning and meeting your eyes, sending a spark flickering through your veins.

"welcome home, petal," he said, his full lips quirking up in that gentle smile you had come to crave.

"long time no see," you teased, knowing it had been only a couple of hours.

his gaze was full of something heavy when he tilted his head, heaped some pasta onto two plates. "felt long," he admitted, "the house is so weird without you here."

your stomach flipped. he couldn't just say things like that, you decided, if he didn't expect you to melt completely, a puddle of pink glitter glue on the hardwood floor.

"weird how?" you asked, hating yourself for pushing.

your mother's voice was jarring, harsh in your head. don't fish for compliments, she always said, it's vain.

now that you were older, you wanted a chance to respond to her. is it fishing for compliments if you never get any? if all you ever hear is how you could do better? you took a breath. is it so wrong to want to hear something good?

jamie didn't appear to think you were being vain, anyways. "weird like quiet," he said, gentle and soft, "i don't know, honestly, just different. it's better when you're here."

you couldn't help but blush at his words, even though you had asked for them. the mother in your head scoffed.

you smiled at him, so genuine you could feel your eyes crinkle at the corners. "i think it's better when you're here, too," you said, low and loaded like a secret.

suddenly the air between you grew thick and heavy, simmering with something the reason in you knew better than to identify. you held each other's gazes for a moment, almost begging, daring the other to do something.

you had never been the kind of person to pick dare during sleepover games, always felt truth was the safer bet. now, there was nothing safe about the truth, either. you cleared your throat, fidgeted with your fingers, dropped your gaze and asked him about practice, what he made for dinner.

do you think about me like i think about you? you wanted to ask him. have you ever wanted me to just hold you after a long day? have you ever thought about what my lips would feel like on your neck?

you shivered, pushed the thoughts away as you ate dinner together, tried to lean into the privilege of spending time with him, even if you wished for something more.

can't this be enough? you pleaded. why isn't this enough?

the words of your routine spun around the two of you like a whirlpool. work, skate, game, lift, dinner, road trip, copywriting. the words of your combined schedules swirled around your head.

better those that the other words, always lurking around the two of you like childhood monsters under a bed: eyes, heat, lips, sweet, gentle, soft, shoulders, arms.

you must have zoned out, because he waved a hand once in front of your face. "petal?"

you shook yourself out of your trance-like state. "sorry," you said, already feeling the familiar flush of embarrassment.

he fixed you with a look. "for what?" he asked, less confused, more curious.

you closed your eyes for a second, took a deep breath. why was he making you explain this? "i mean, i was probably staring at you, right?" you said, feeling the shame of it prick you on the fingers like a thousand needles.

his gaze dropped to your mouth for a millisecond before meeting your eyes again. there was a silence, and when he spoke again, his voice was husky. "you can stare at me all you want, petal."

you could have whimpered, could have screamed. don't say things like that to me, you wanted to tell him. tell me things like that every second until i die, you also wanted to say.

"really?" you whispered, too starry-eyed to cringe at yourself. your food lay forgotten in front of you. how many times had you eaten dinner together, just like this? how many times had you pushed this feeling away? was it possible that he was doing just the same?

he hummed, ran his tongue along the inside of his teeth, a self-satisfied move from him you have never really seen before. you rubbed your crossed ankles together.

you took a breath, a last beat of courage, before reaching across the counter and brushing his hair from out of his eyes. his skin scorched your fingertips, his eyes made your breathing slow and shallow. "you can stare at me, too," you said to him, pulling your arm back.

his eyes were full of understanding. "i know," he told you. "i do."

that knowledge was still haunting you days later. that he noticed you, registered your presence, like you did him. how could you ever act normally again, knowing this? how could you ever act without the constant weight of him around?

so you did the only thing you could think of - you ignored him, avoided him, hoped to skillfully evade his careful gaze, however much it hurt you not to see him, to talk with him, to ask him how practices and games went.

such a task became impossible when the bell clinked cheerily, the following weekend, signifying you and the coffee shop of the arrival of its favorite patron.

you looked up, halfway surprised to see him enter with another person, too, a teammate you had met, you were sure of it, but one you couldn't quite recall the name of. the two of them approached the counter in a shroud of laughter and easiness.

apparently, your coworker recognized the friend, too, because upon their approach she began a slow, sarcastic applause. "gentlemen," she said, "allow me to congratulate you on a recording breaking game last night."

jamie and his friend shared a look. "um," jamie began, careful, "we lost last night."

"oh," your coworker finished an order and set it on the pick-up counter. "i should have clarified. the record was for laziest defensive performance i've ever witnessed." she gave them a quick thumbs up. "congrats again! know you guys have been working real hard for this one."

jamie shook his head lightheartedly before locking eyes with you, smiling slightly. you hadn't really spoken since the other night, but you still didn't really know what to say. you didn't know where you stood, what lines were still drawn.

thankfully, your coworker refused to drop it, not leaving any opportunity for silence, now speaking directly to the newcomer. "i'm so happy you're here, 11," she continued. "you know that you're allowed in your own defensive zone, right? feel free to cross the red line, i think you'll find that defense makes winning a lot easier."

the object of your coworkers jabs turned to jamie. "am i supposed to take this?"

jamie shrugged. "i usually do."

she waved him off. "yeah, but you're hoping i'll put in a good word with your roommate." you blushed at her words, hope sparking at the possibility of them being true.

jamie didn't drop your gaze. "yeah, and how far is that getting me? you gonna put in a good word?"

every fiber of your being told you not to take his words at face value. every fiber of your being wanted to.

she scoffed. "yeah, right. if anything i'd just say you're a pushover."

the newcomer scrunched up his expressive face. "well, in that case, why don't you keep your thoughtful advice to yourself?"

she tilted her head back and laughed. "what, 11, can't take a little feedback?" she pouted, false pity all over her face. "guess you're every bit the flashy bust they say you are."

"no one is saying that!" he fumed, "literally name one person who is saying that!"

you and your roommate stifled your laughter as their argument grew.

you made him his drink, handed it over. his face was gentle, soft as took the cup from you. "you're avoiding me," he said, not accusatory, a simple observation.

you couldn't lie to him and say you weren't, so you only stayed quiet.

"i miss you," he said, so simple and genuine in its honesty that you could have cried.

"i miss you, too," you said, easy as an exhale.

his gaze glimmered. "so watch a movie with me tonight, yeah?"

your mouth twitched, because you wanted to, so badly, but you didn't know if you could trust yourself.

he shifted back and forth on his heels. the sun dripped so languishingly over his brow, down his jaw and neck. "please?" he asked, and you were done.

"okay," you conceded, butterflies already fluttering to life in your stomach at the thought of spending tonight with him on the couch.

a thud and a grunt shook you both from your conversation as you turned to your respective friends. your coworker appeared to be throwing bags of coffee beans at jamie's teammate. "can't hide behind a ref now, can you?" she taunted the lanky newcomer, who struggled to catch the bags.

"this is the behavior of a deranged fan," he pointed out, placing the bags back on the counter. "i hope you realize that."

"you wish i was a fan of yours," she said, crossing her arms over her chest. "on an unrelated note, can i take a video of you wishing my little brother good luck on his math test tomorrow?"

the video was filmed, reluctant thanks and apologies were given and accepted.

"i apologize for the physical assault, but not the truth, 11," your coworker conceded, "and you're only getting any apology at all because this is going to mean the world to my brother."

"can't you just apologize normally?" you pushed, looking to make the rest of the patrons more comfortable, the energy less combative.

"tell you what," she said to him, "if you put in some effort next game to something besides michigans and between-the-legs shots, i'll give you the best apology you've ever seen."

jamie hissed. "he's gonna take that in a way you won't like."

his teammate leveled your coworker with a smirk. "do i get to pick how you apologize?"

she scoffed, an angry flush all over her face. "no, you don't get to pick! what the hell is the matter with you?"

you and jamie shared a look at their bickering. see you at home, petal, he mouthed to you on the way out, argumentative words still saturating the air.

bye, jamie, you mouthed back with a wave.

when you got back from work, called out your greeting, settled in, and changed out of your uniform, you found him on the couch, were all too happy to join him, however off limits it felt.

he felt off limits, like this, all messy hair and eyes tired with the day, worn-in sweatpants and sweatshirts from junior hockey and lazy stretches that revealed slivers of skin.

you lifted up a blanket, pulled your knees to your chest underneath it, avoided his gaze. "your friend's a character, hm?" you started.

he shifted his posture to get a better look at you, even though he was now faced halfway away from the movie he was in the middle of. "who, trevor?" he gave a playful roll of his eyes. "ignore him. he thinks your friend's hot and doesn't know what to do about it."

"that's him flirting?" you said, eyes wide, words spoken slowly for emphasis. "good grief, his act needs some work."

jamie's smile slanted into something dangerous. "what, wouldn't work on you, petal?" suddenly the blanket over you seemed like entirely not enough coverage. you felt completely exposed as you gave a slight shake of your head. he draped a heavy arm along the back of the couch. "no?" he paused, forced you to meet his magnetic gaze as he ran a hand through his hair. "what would work on you, then?"

you searched his eyes for a drop of humor, of teasing, of something that would hurt you, as you had long ago trained yourself to. you could sniff out potential abandonment, embarrassment like a bloodhound. but you came up empty, with him.

what could you say to him? that anything that he does, anything he could ever do, that's what would work on you? that he works on you?

your careful silence could have been a banshee scream into an open expanse as the air between the two of you again adopted that rolling flame, that lick of heat up your bare legs.

your eyes widened as he tugged your feet and calves into his laps with one hand, gently but firmly, just enough so that you could feel the warmth from his thick quads pooling in the backs of your knees.

just close enough to want more. just close enough to know you shouldn't.

"'m picky," you said, almost out of breath, swallowing your uneasiness down until the only thing you felt was him. "not into the interest disguised as insults."

he hummed as if he understood, ran his fingers over your shins, feather-light, so much so that later you would wonder if you had only imagined he had touched you. "so what?" he said, meeting your eyes in the dim light you had long ago deemed especially dangerous. "like to be called pretty, petal? like it when they make it, so, so easy for you?" his fingers dragged across your ankle in an electrifying way that had you forgetting about your promise. "like when they go slow?"

you let out some kind of strangled sound, halfway between a nervous laugh and a whimper. because you did like all of those things, of course you did. you liked proof that people cared about you, how could you not?

you couldn't even dwell on how delicious the word pretty sounded in his mouth, how much you wanted to taste it, because something else in his wording willed confidence into your body, clarity into your head in place of guilt.

"who's they?" you asked, your voice steadier than it had been in weeks.

"hm?" he asked, rough.

"i said," you repeated, shifting your body until you rested on top of his lap, your legs on either side of his hips. "who's they?" you were closer than you had ever been as you felt him underneath you, almost chest to chest. so close you could feel his breathing stutter against you. you brushed his messy hair from his face until you could see his eyes in all of their gorgeous truth. "i don't care much about them, jamie."

something rumbled in him, something you felt in your bones. he looked so, so beautiful, and his mouth was right there, and was he tilting his head closer to you? and-

"jim! when the hell are you gonna give me back my blender?" your door swinging open and shut might as well have been a strike of lightning as you scrambled away from each other. trevor's voice cut through your apartment like thunder, like a cold shower.

in a moment he appeared in the doorframe, suddenly eyeing the two of you with the suspicion only a best friend could muster. he gestured between the two of you, now comically far apart on opposite sides of the couch.

"what's going on here?" he asked.

jamie tilted his head back again, wiped at his face with both hands. "sure, yeah, come on in," he said to trevor through his fingers.

"how did you get in here?" you asked, you voice still dark with want, the aftermath of confidence still lacing your tone.

"key," trevor said, waving you off as if this piece of information wasn't relevant. "why?" he looked between the two of you again, eyes narrowed. "'m i interrupting something?"

silence followed. you didn't look at jamie, and he didn't clarify. "no," you said finally, not angry, but knowing the moment was over. "i guess not."

and so you pulled yourself up, made your way back to your room, every inch of your skin buzzing, every heartbeat a burst of electricity through your body.

voices grew fainter as you neared your door.

"if you'd just give me back my blender this wouldn't be such a problem," trevor hissed.

"and you couldn't've shot me a text? figured you'd just break in to my house?" jamie's voice was resigned. you knew he could never stay mad at his friend.

"it's not breaking in if you gave me a key, scumbag."

you shut your door behind you and collapsed onto your bed, still feeling the phantom of his body underneath you, the ghost of his fingertips digging into your hips. you groaned into a pillow, hating that when you closed your eyes all you saw was his full, pink mouth.

the next day, when you relayed all of this new, and not so new information to your friend at work, she shook her head slowly.

"i don't know," she said, pouring a double shot over ice, "but it sounds like you've either gotta make this thing serious or check out your other options." she shot you a look. "no more of this pining bullshit."

you whacked her with a rag playfully, but sighed. "i can't make it serious. and i don't have other options, so looks like pining's all i got."

"tell me you're kidding." she glared at you. "i've had like three friends just in the past week come in and text me after asking if you're single."

you scrunched up your face. "no, you haven't," you said, knowing there's no way that could be true.

"callin' me a liar?" she prompted, pulling out her phone with her free hand and scrolling until she found one of the texts, facing it to you.

sure enough, there was a message from some guy, some ordinary name, asking if she'd set him up with the "smoke in the canada hat," referring to the hat you had borrowed of jamie's earlier this week.

"whatever," you said, "it doesn't really matter."

"it does matter." your friend set the drink down on the pickup counter and turned to meet your gaze entirely. "it matters to me that you find it so hard to believe that people are into you." she grasped for one of your hands, held it firmly.

her touch was welcome, and so were her words. because honestly, you knew why you found it so hard to believe. because even though you had a pretty good relationship with yourself, even though you knew now that you were beautiful, and smart, and funny, and kind, when you were young, you didn't know that. when you were young, the people you were closest to were basically telling you that you weren't those things.

flashes of tense family dinners, long car rides during which you were the butt of every joke shot across your mind like meteors, just as destructive.

saw you talking to a boy today during lunch, one of your older siblings would say after a long day, maybe middle school, maybe sophomore year. is he your boy-friend? the words slow and taunting, malicious, immediately making an angry, embarrassed flush break out across your face.

don't be ridiculous, peanut, your mother would scold your sibling from the front seat, it's rude. and it's not like she was wrong, the boy you had been talking to wasn't your boyfriend, but it stung like a wasp nonetheless.

why is it ridiculous? you wanted to ask, tears brimming, hot behind your eyes. would that really be so hard to believe?

or countless calls with your parents during your first year of college, each more demeaning than the last. you know you're allowed to date, right? your mother might say. you know we aren't strict about that kind of thing. you held back a bitter and sarcastic congratulations.

i know, you would say, trying to hide the defeat you felt at the disappointed sigh she had done such a poor job of hiding.

every not-so subtle jab landed deep, until even the words put yourself out there induced a physical reaction.

it hurt to think about allowing yourself to want, to be wanted, because what if they laughed in your face? what if it all really was ridiculous, all this time? what if it really was hard to believe?

you sighed, now, squeezed your coworker's hand.

"how about this," she proposed, her eyes as soft as you had ever seen them. "how about i set you up with one of my friends who's interested, just one date, and we see how it goes? no pressure, and i'll make sure he knows it's no pressure. think of it like practice."

you thought for a moment, bit your lip. you could use a stress-free practice, that much was true, and you trusted this friend to not set you up with a sleaze-ball. and, you confessed, if you wanted to fizzle out whatever was going on with your roommate, this would probably be a good start.

so you agreed. the decision was made easier by the fact that jamie was on the road this week, so you didn't have him to distract you. the day of your dinner date ended up being the day he was set to return, but he wasn't supposed to get back until the middle of the night.

you wouldn't have to explain yourself to anyone, or even tell anyone how it went, if you didn't want to, you reminded yourself. just practice, no pressure.

and the guy was really sweet, honestly. he was good-looking, too, if not a bit more lanky, taller than the guys you usually went for. he asked you questions, and seemed to care about the answers, and you found yourself in a full conversation with him pretty easily.

but then something in your mind would catch on his shoulders and think not big enough to sink your teeth into, and then on his mouth and think he'd never call you petal, and then on his cheeks, which didn't blush the whole night, not even once.

and he was a really nice guy, but you found yourself wanting to invite him to join your friend group's book club, not invite him back to your place. you found yourself thinking quite intently about a certain person who was not, in fact, the man sitting across from you at the table.

which was fine, you realized, because this is practice, and he doesn't have to be the one. practice means you can find a friend.

so, with a smile, a shared admission that you would like to get to know each others as friends, and a promise to send him the address to the next book club meeting, you left your first date in forever feeling proud of yourself.

on your way back into your apartment, you sent your friend from work a thank you text before making your way to your room and changing into something more comfortable.

you settled on sleep shorts and an old t-shirt before heading to the kitchen to make a cup of tea, breathing in the smell of steeping chamomile when a sound behind you made you jump.

thankfully you would recognize that frame anywhere. you exhaled. "jesus, jamie," you breathed, "thought you wouldn't be back 'til later."

he stepped forward, the light so dark and dim and dangerous, especially after not seeing him all week. the slope of his high cheekbones, the sharp cut of his jaw, the deep pooling of feeling in his eyes. it all rushed at you a million miles an hour and stole your breath.

"got in early," he explained, his gaze ever so slow down your figure, like he was mapping it, committing it to memory. "were you out?" he asked, his voice suddenly rough.

you swallowed, thinking about what to say. a pause settled between the two of you, thick like mud, decadent like chocolate pudding.

i missed you, you wanted to tell him. tell me you missed me, too.

he inched closer still, leaned against the kitchen counter as you busied yourself with stirring your tea with the tea bag. "don't wanna tell me?" he mused. "how could that be, petal?"

you didn't meet his eyes, suddenly feeling childish. "went on a date."

you were both silent, for a moment. you looked up to check if he was still there. "and why didn't you wanna tell me?" his voice was gravelly.

your hands were shaking, you realized, so you set down your mug, crossed your arms against your chest with a sigh. "he was nice," you admitted, didn't quite miss the green flame that sparked across his gaze, blinked out in a moment. "but i was distracted." you looked down at your feet.

then he was right in front of you, a step apart. it had been so long since you had been so close, and the memory of what had happed that last time burned between the two of you, unspoken, yet the most obvious fixture in the room.

you looked up to meet his curious, careful gaze, wanted so badly to lean forward, sink into his broad chest, breathe him in and never stop.

"by what, petal?" he asked, so close you could practically feel the words on your own lips, his tone so low and heavy your stomach dropped.

you swallowed, watched his eyes track the movement. "you," you said simply, honestly.

and then his eyes searched yours for a single telling moment before his hands came to cup your face, his lips capturing yours in a kiss that held a million i missed you, i missed you, i missed you's.

you let out some soft noise into his mouth at the lovely pressure of his lips against yours, so firm and knowing. you pressed yourself so closely against his chest, one hand on his collarbone, the other grasping around his neck.

he leaned forward into you so pleasantly before moving his arms down to lift you by the waist, setting you down gently on the top of the counter, moaning when you fixed your hands in his hair.

you swallowed down his sounds like elixir, wanted every single one of them, as his wide hands kneaded at the flesh of your hips slowly. you raked your hands down the back of neck delicately, enough to relish in the shudder left in their wake.

finally, you both pulled away, only just, only enough to slow your heaving chests, enough to selfishly see the effect you both had on the other. matching glossed over gazes, swollen lips, exhales heavy with unspoken words.

you pushed some of his hair from his face, soft under your gentle fingers, could have swooned at how he was looking at you, right now. like there was no one else in the universe, like the stars existed only for you.

"i have to go home tomorrow," you said, suddenly, like a ridiculous idiot, wanting to shove the words back into your mouth as he traced light circles across the tops of your thigh. why did you say that?

but his expression didn't change. "i'll come," he said immediately.

your heart jumped, but you didn't want him to come and see your family, really, because family gatherings never were the most flattering, for you. "you don't have to," you said, "i know you're busy, and it's just for a little bit, just for the day."

"i'll come, petal," he repeated.

your mouth quirked, just a bit. "yeah?"

"yeah," he said, a drowsy smile slanting across his face. a smile you couldn't say no to, a smile you just had to feel against your lips.

a smile that meant, the following morning, you were standing on the front step of your childhood home next to jamie, who was holding a potted plant.

"you know you didn't need to bring anything," you said after you rang the doorbell, jittery with nerves. how long had it been?

he only pinched you lightly in the side. "swear i won't drop it this time, petal," he said with the easy tone that calmed your nerves, if only slightly.

and then the door was opening, and you were ushered in among a flurry of hugs and exclamations of it having been to long.

your older brother said you looked different, your mother said you needed to visit more often. you had the sinking feeling that coming home was a mistake.

then came the inevitable. "and who's this handsome young man?" your mother asked in a sugary sweet tone that made the room smell like the dentist's office, at least to you. "is this that friend from work you told me about a while ago?"

you opened your mouth to speak but quickly shut it again, slightly confused, maybe disappointed? other people's parents assumed they were dating any person they spoke to, which you were sure was its own beast, but you had actually brought someone to a family meal and your mom thought he was your coworker?

"uh," you started, struggling to find your footing. "this is jamie."

you wanted to put your forehead through the tastefully muted wallpaper of the mudroom, but jamie only shook your father's hand, endured awkward hugs from your mother and siblings, handed over his plant with practiced grace.

you felt your hands tremble ever so slightly, willed them to still, begged any courage and confidence to show itself, but your chest was tight, like your lungs were filling up with polluted water.

jamie caught your eye, registered your defensive stance, gave you a look full of softness and acceptance before stepping to your side and pulling you in for a gentle side-hug, his embrace strong and sure in all the ways you were not. he pressed his lips to the top of your head, lips you still felt the memory of on your mouth, lips that sent a shiver of stability down your spine. "much better than last time, eh, petal?" he said, looking down at you, still tucked into his side. "no dirt under your nails, this time."

you couldn't help but give a slight shake of your head, squeezed him tighter in a way you hoped said thank you.

when you looked back up to your family, there was an almost comical look of surprise in your mother's eyes, a look of extreme boredom in your siblings'.

you father cleared his throat. "brunch's ready," he said, urging your mother to lead you all to the dining room.

jamie pulled out your chair for you, leaned forward to your ear when you sat down. "look so pretty today," he whispered, his voice a low rasp, only for you, only to help you settle, only because it was the truth.

"you know, jamie, she's never brought someone home before," your mother said at some point during the meal, like it was some kind of inside joke between the two of them, a joke you were not a part of. she shared some kind of look with him, but his face was blank. "honestly, we were starting to get worried." your father and her gave light laughs, laughs that made your stomach roll with anxiety, shame.

good god, couldn't they give you a break? you pushed your food around your plate, very much not hungry, very much wanting to leave.

jamie didn't laugh, though, didn't indulge them, didn't pretend like he was in on their joke. "worried about what?" he asked, his expression and tone entirely plain and curious, waiting patiently for elaboration that never came. his question was met with flickering glances between your parents, nervous laughter dying in their mouths.

you looked down at your plate again, bit your lip to hide your smile, reached under the table to squeeze his hand. he squeezed yours right back.

the rest of the meal was fine. soon enough, you were saying your goodbyes, doling out your own awkward hugs along with vague assurances that you would be back soon.

"and it was so wonderful to meet you, jamie," your mother said, a hand on his forearm, "know you're welcome here anytime."

you pushed aside the spark of jealousy within you. what would it be like to know that for yourself? to feel welcome in this home, whenever you wanted?

jamie just looked at you with that molten softness in his dark eyes. you pushed his hair from his face, the way you had grown accustomed to doing, more a comfort to you at this point. he leaned into your touch, however slightly.

"thank you for having me," he said, politely, before looking at you once more. "'m honored to be the first person petal's felt comfortable enough to bring home."

you could have melted at how genuine he sounded, at the idea that he was honored to be around you, of all things, at all.

when you were both in the car, you turned to him. "you didn't have to say that, you know," you told him as he pulled the car out of the driveway, started the trek home.

he just kept one hand on the wheel, took yours with the other. "wanted to," he said, glancing over at you with a steadiness that was impossible to deny. "meant it."

a smile came easily to your face, a flush came easier. he lifted your hand to his mouth, lightly pressed his lips to the top of it, making you shift in your seat with poorly hidden delight, perfectly warm all over.

you arrived back home, and fell back into your routine.

jamie dropped you off at work the following day, rolling his window down when you got out the passenger door. "petal!" he called.

you turned, that grin that seemed to be every-present around him on your face. "yeah?"

the faintest of blushes began to prick at his cheeks. "can i have a kiss, please?"

you were all too willing to comply, leaning against the side of the car and pulling his lips to yours with a gentle hand on his jaw. "see you later?" you murmured against his mouth, butterflies so alive in your stomach you half believed they would fly up your throat. he nodded, a little dazed, promised to see you after your shift, as he had the day off.

the lovely dizziness began to dull as soon as you entered the coffee shop, as there was a very unexpected guest behind the counter with your friend.

"have you never even heard of a latte?" your coworker seethed, the words hard and angry through her teeth.

"feel free to call this off at any time, sugar," a smug trevor drawled, wearing an apron and a haphazardly drawn name tag.

you set your things down and began to tie your own apron around yourself. "afternoon, lovely," you greeted your friend before looking at the newcomer. "trevor."

he nodded to you with a smile in a greeting of his own before the espresso machine started making a menacing sound.

you took the next customer's order, began to prepare it. "do i wanna know why you appear to be an employee today?"

"lost a bet," he said, looking at your coworker, who grimaced.

"we agreed that if he didn't block five shots against the hawks last week, he'd work a shift," she crossed her arms over her chest. "but already this is more of a punishment for me than for him."

he turned up his smile to the megawatts.

you shook your head with a laugh. "you know this is breaking, like, a billion laws," you said, pouring soy milk into a cup. "we can't just hire randoms to work a single shift."

trevor placed a fake-offended hand over his heart. "i'm not some random," he clarified.

"according to california law, you are," you said, matter-of-factly, finishing off the drink and placing it on the pickup counter.

"oh, whatever, 11, just go," your coworker said, exasperated, "you've already messed up like twelve times in the last two hours."

he pouted, teasing like a kindergarten bully, all grown up. "you wound me, sugar," he said, turning around slowly. "untie my apron for me?"

she took off her bucket hat and whacked him with it. "don't think i've forgiven you, either," she said, pointing a warning finger at him.

"wouldn't dream of it," he cooed, taking out him phone. "haven't i earned a drink for my troubles? jimmy won't be here for another five minutes."

you scrunched up your brow. "jamie?" you groaned for him, "wish you'd called it quits like two minutes earlier. he was just here."

both your coworker and trevor whipped their heads around. "jim dropped you off?"

you nodded. your coworker gave you an impressed grin, held her hand down low for trevor to slap in a high-five. "let's go," she said, pumping her fist.

you rolled your eyes at the two of them. "so the goon squad is working together, now?" you asked.

trevor rested his elbow on the top of your friend's head, making her hiss and bat his arm away. "best team around," he said, smugly, before looking at his phone. "time to go," he stated, accepting the two drinks you pushed into his hands with a thank you. "until next time, sugar," he said, looking at your friend.

"the red line won't hurt you unless you let it," she called out behind him.

you immediately started peppering her with questions about her bet with jamie's teammate, trying to get her to admit she didn't hate him as much as she let on.

"jamie says he just thinks you're hot and doesn't know what to do about it," you told her before she went out back for her break.

she fixed you with a look. "you can tell jamie that his friend better find out what to do about it." you laughed as the door shut behind her.

the rest of your shift went by terribly slowly. it wasn't that busy, and, honestly, you really missed jamie. you had only just found out what his lips felt like on your own, after all, and now you were having a hard time thinking about anything else. no one should feel this overheated, this distracted, while trying to steep peppermint tea and froth oat milk.

too many times, you lost yourself in daydreams about what his thighs felt like underneath you, how his fingers would feel like in your mouth, what his hand would feel like, gripping your hair.

you just wanted to be close to him, as close to him as possible.

by the time your coworker was dropping you off at your apartment, your mouth was practically dry with want, and if someone were to call you desperate, you weren't sure if you would have it in you to care.

you locked the door behind you, the silence in the kitchen and mudroom telling you he was probably in his own room, probably gaming.

you could have whined, thinking you would have to wait until he was done until you could kiss him, touch him, feel him how you wanted to.

you lasted pretty much as long as it took you to change into more comfortable clothes. undeniable want had you rapping your knuckles lightly against his door, exhaling gratefully when a soft come in wafted through the air.

and then the door was open, and he was there, exactly as you had thought him to be. his headset pushed his messy hair up in different directions, his knees spread wide, his posture relaxed.

he made eye contact with you, something warm shining in his gaze as he pushed his mic away from his mouth. "hey, petal," he rasped, his voice weary with use. "you're home."

you nodded, bit your lip, twisted the sole of your foot into the ground slowly. "know you're busy," you said, soft, almost bashful, "but can i just sit with you?" you swallowed down any shakiness. "couldn't stop thinking 'bout you at work."

you knew he wouldn't laugh at you, but were splendidly pleased anyways when he simply nodded, let that smile slant across his face, opened up his arms in invitation, contentment obvious in his expression.

you breathed out and crossed the room to where he sat, lowered yourself onto his lap as he spread his legs apart wider to make you more comfortable. you crossed your legs over his thigh, leaned back into his chest, let the warmth and feeling of him envelop you like a fog. his arms came to reach around you as he kept playing, fiddling with his controller. you could have fallen asleep here, if you weren't so alert, if every inch of your body didn't feel like it was slowly catching flame.

you hummed, shifted your hips back against him, making him let out a soft grunt. "getting comfortable?" he whispered, to which you nodded, smiled, leaned your head against his chest.

you tried to stay still, watch the screen as he played, but something about feeling his breaths against your back, the heat of him pooling in your neck, the firmness of him underneath you, it made you restless, impatient.

so much so that after maybe a few minutes, you were craning your head up to press your lips lightly to his jaw, his throat, just behind his ear, twisting your fingers into the hair at the nape of his neck.

he let out a groan, low and dangerous. "thought you just wanted to sit," he said, his mouth quirking up, a tightness to his voice that hadn't been there before.

"changed my mind," you mumbled into his shoulder, grazing your teeth over his deltoid.

"be patient, petal," he rumbled, "wait 'til 'm finished, hm?"

you pouted against his jaw, figured you had done months of waiting, if you counted back to that first day. more than your fair share. you were done being patient.

so, instead of waiting, like he had asked you to, you wordlessly pushed yourself from his chest, sank down to your knees into front of his chair, gently placed your palms on his thighs, forcing his attention to you.

his gaze settled on you like heavy sediment, scorching, bubbling. when he spoke, you felt it against your face like a caress. "fuck, petal, dreamt of you like this."

your smile was slight, sly. "what? on my knees for you, jamie?"

he gave an almost pained shake of his head, made some strained sound of refutation. he set his controller down and pulled off his headset, tossed it aside as you tugged at his sweatpants, rolled your hand over him, hard and hot.

he tilted his head back, groaned. "dreamt of you lookin' at me like this," he confessed, words thick with revelation, "like you want me."

something almost religious passed between you, because what was this, if not something worth worshipping? something built on devotion beyond logic, beyond better judgement?

"i do want you, jamie," you said, finality swimming in your heated tone, "i want you so, so bad."

you bit your lip to hide your grin when he whimpered at your words, his eyes screwing shut as you took him in your hand, spit onto his cock, pumped him up and down before running your tongue along the length of him, drinking in his sounds greedily.

he rooted his thick hand in your hair, draping it away from your face as you sunk your mouth down onto him. "fuck," he choked out, slow and strained, "fuck, petal, you can have me."

you moaned around him, grounded by his grip, the pleasant tug on your scalp, urged him to the back of your throat until your eyes began to water, until his thighs began to tense, before retreating again, peering up at him, eager to take every inch of him in, like this.

so unguarded and uncontrolled, knowing he was thinking only of you, pure want dripping down his frame and face like watercolor, this image of him made you acutely aware of just how wet you already were.

you tugged your hand up and down him again, grinned when he shuddered. "taste so good, jamie," you rasped, running your thumb along the tip, "'ve wanted your cock in my mouth for so long, baby."

his chest rose and fell as he moaned, desperate, overwhelmed. his thumb circled your jaw as you continued moving your hand, spitting onto him again. "should've told me, petal," he whined, "would've given you anything you wanted." his voice shook, you felt his muscles tense again as you took him in your mouth again. "waited so good for me, hm?"

you hummed, held him in your mouth, hollowed out your cheeks until tears broke your waterline, his grunts telling you he was close as you let your nails dig into the tops of his thighs.

"fuck, 'm gonna cum," he breathed, "feel so good like this, petal, too good, can't hold on." his grip in your hair tightened, his hips bucking up, hitting a deeper spot in your throat. he made to pull back, but you only moved your head with him, swallowing around him until you tasted him on your tongue, his moan resounding in your head like an organ in a cathedral.

only after he finished did you pull your mouth up off of him, tilted your head onto your elbow, which was resting on his thigh, red with marks from your clutching hands. you watched him come down from his high, watched his lashes flutter as his eyes opened, felt his grip loosen in your hair and his hand come down to rest under your chin, as gentle and affectionate a touch as you had ever felt.

he led your mouth to his, lifting you off of your knees, slanting his lips across yours like a smile before pulling away, looking at you for a moment, tracing your mouth with his thumb. "look so pretty like this, petal," he praised, low and steady, "so fuckin' perfect."

and you blushed, because you knew how you looked.

you knew that your face was flushed with exertion, knew that spit ran down onto your chin, knew that your lashes were clumped together with tears, knew that your lips with swollen and your neck shone with sweat.

he kissed the corner of your mouth anyways, looked at you like there had never been anything more beautiful. "let me taste you, hm?" he murmured against your skin.

you shivered with pleasure at his words, but whined. "need you so bad, jamie," you pleaded, "need you inside of me." you peered up at him through your lashes. "please?"

he shifted until you hovered above him, tugged your shorts aside, ran his fingers through your folds and cursed at how wet he found you. "anything you want, petal," he rasped, bringing his fingers to his mouth and licking you off of them. "fuck, pretty girl, askin' me so nicely, hm?"

you nodded feverishly, reached under you to find him impossibly hard, again, before angling him to you and sinking down onto him, your knees on either side of his hips.

his head fell back at that first feeling, your mouth dropping open as your body pulled taut at the stretch. you whimpered when he reached behind you to pull you to his chest, changing the angle, while he shifted under you, both of you breathing heavy, searching for something to stop you from floating away.

you settled on letting your heavy head drop to his neck, letting shaky exhales escape past your teeth, melt into his collarbone like snowflakes on windowpanes.

he clutched at your waist, began to slowly move his hips, lifting you up and down in a rhythm that burned behind your eyes, that you felt on your tongue, in your toes.

"how do you feel like this?" he whispered, practically to himself, as if in a dream, as he kept up his pace, slow and brutal.

"like what, baby?" you breathed, picking your head up and beginning to fuck back onto him with more force, wanting to feel him harder, deeper.

"fuck," he whimpered, searching for an answer, his messy hair falling into his face, sticking to the gloss of sweat shining on his brow, "better than i imagined, petal. so perfect, made for me."

you moaned at his admission, reached around his neck for support. "been thinkin' 'bout me, jamie?" you asked, an almost cocky grin peeking through.

"so much," he whined, picking up his pace now, causing you to choke down a strangled moan, "fuck, petal, was worried you'd hear me through the walls."

his confession shot right to your core as you clenched around him, imagining him trying to keep quiet, touching himself, thinking of you. you dug your nails into the back of his neck as he laid a hand across your stomach, pressed down until he could feel the outline of himself inside of you, moving in and out.

the sensation was so intense that you had to shut your eyes, the pressure inside of you pulling so tightly you bit your tongue.

"like that, hm?" he said, only the faintest trace of smugness in his tone. "like that i thought of you with my hand around my cock, petal?"

you nodded, moaned your affirmation, felt yourself grow so deliciously close.

"thought of you, just like this," he breathed into your neck, still pushing at your stomach, hitting somewhere impossibly deep inside you, hard and fast. "squeezing me so perfect, making those pretty sounds for me."

"'m so close, jamie," you pleaded, your voice wrecked, your jaw aching, "please make me cum? need you so bad, been needin' you for so long."

his neck tensed under your palm as his thrusts grew sporadic, his breathing labored. "fuck, petal, cum on my cock, yeah?" his other hand gripped your hip so hard you knew it would leave a mark. "been such a good girl for me."

you came apart at his words, collapsing onto his chest, clenching down on him so completely that he reached another high, warm and absolute. he stilled, both of your chests rising and falling against each other. you ran your fingers soothingly over the back of his neck, he rubbed circles into the sides of your hips as if in a daze.

finally, when the fog cleared like falling rain, you pulled back to look at his face, flushed, long lashes framing heavy lids, his gaze thick and syrupy with affection.

you lightly swept the damp hair from his forehead, pressed a gentle kiss to his brow that made him smile up at you lazily.

he ran his thumb along your cheekbone. "wanna stay in my room, tonight?" he asked, cheekily, like you were kids planning a sleepover, scheming up the best way to ask your parents.

so you just nodded and laughed, and he kissed the laugh from your lips as if it tasted of sugar.

fin.

#hockey #hockey smut #nhl #nhl smut #smut #jack hughes #jack hughes smut #quinn hughes #trevor zegras smut #jack hughes x reader #jamie drysdale imagine #jamie drysdale x reader #jamie drysdale #jamie drysdale smut #anaheim ducks #quinn hughes smut #jamie drysdale x y/n #new jersey devils #luke hughes smut

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hrtsdevils · 5 months

Text

dog-eared. | jh86

summary reader and jack broke up before he was drafted to the nhl. after years of watching from afar, jack finally sees y/n in person. past feelings are brought up to the surface.

pairing jack hughes x fem!reader

wc 2.6k

an my lovers… also another gracie fc sorry idk what to tell you! also for the sake of the plot pretend that the devils play the ducks on tuesday instead of vancouver thanks!!! loosely based off of everywhere everything by noah kahan ft gracie abrams

It had been years since you’d seen Jack. You broke up right before he started his NHL career as it seemed like your plans didn’t align. You’d be going to college in California, as USC had been your dream school your whole life. You dreamed of living somewhere where it was sunny and it was never freezing, unlike the weather in your hometown of Toronto. He dreamed of making it big in the professional league, which he was so close to achieving already.

The breakup between you two was mostly mutual. It happened in your 2005 Honda Civic, in the parking lot of a gas station after you had gone to buy soft drinks. The two of you could feel the breakup impending, and it felt as if the weather channel told you a meteor would be hitting Earth within minutes. As if the sun was about to collapse. The silence was deafening as you started your car, putting your drink in the cup holder. He followed suit.

“I..” He started before you cut him off.

“You think we need to break up?” You asked, giving him a soft smile. It wasn’t genuine, it was quite the opposite. You just didn’t want him to feel guilty, you thought it was the right thing as well.

He nodded softly, “I just think we’re on two separate paths… you know?”

“Yeah, I get it.” Your hands tensed under your thighs, as you were using them as hand warmers. “I love you.”

“I love you too, Buttons.” That had been his nickname for you since the 8th grade. You had a perfect little button nose, and it quickly caught on and everybody would use it for you as well.

The drive back to his parents’ house was in silence, as neither of you had much to say to each other. In about ten minutes, you were parked in front of his house. “You’re still going to come to my birthday party, right?” You asked. You were turning eighteen in a few weeks, June 7th.

“Yeah, I will.” He smiled sadly, “It’s not over. We’re just separating until we get brought back together.”

You huffed, “When’s that? Whenever fate decides?”

“Precisely. Call it a dog ear.. you like to read, right?”

“Yeah, I would never doggy ear my books though.” You giggled, “Bye, Jacky.”

That was the last you talked formally. He never did come to your party, texting you an excuse about how he had a training camp that day. You didn’t believe it, but you never said anything about it. It had been years, you watched him succeed from your dorm room and then to your small apartment couch. Your roommates never understood your love for the sport, but you always attributed it to being from up north.

That was a reason, but not the only one.

Every year you anticipated the Devils coming down to Anaheim to play the Ducks. That was practically the only time you watched Jack in person. You were particularly excited this year, as his little brother Luke would be playing too. You adored Luke, he was so sweet and well-mannered, especially to you. Trevor would also be there. He wouldn’t be playing as he was injured, but you’d caught him after a few games to catch up and he was your little piece of Michigan in California.

It was a Friday game, which met that the tickets were slightly higher and there were fewer of them. You finally got your good friend, Cecilia, to agree to go with you. She was familiar with your love of hockey, and she knew you went to a lot of games. She didn’t know you knew two players on the ice, and two players up in the press box. As you were buying your tickets with her, you got a text from Trevor.

trevor zegras 🐣 : hey buttons r u coming to the game? idk cause jacks playing

You hastily replied, trying to shield your phone from Cece in the most subtle way possible.

y/n buttons : yeahhhh i was jst about to buy my tickets bahaha

trevor zegras 🐣 : don’t buy them ❌❌ i have a club ticket right above the benches if u want it

y/n buttons : usually yes i’d love to but i’m bringing my friend cece

trevor zegras 🐣 : i have 2! i’ll send em to u later

y/n buttons : thanks trev i appreciate u ☺️

You put your phone down and closed your laptop. Cece was a couple feet away on hers, but looked at you when your laptop snapped shut. “Did you buy them?” She questioned, scooting closer to you. You shook your head.

“Kind of? Well, one of my friends is on the team and he’s injured, he offered us seats right behind the bench.”

Her jaw fell slightly, “You never told me you had connections!”

You smiled, “I don’t really, I usually buy my tickets. This was a first time thing, I think he might be drunk.” You tried to explain it in the least suspicious way possible. You didn’t want to seem boastful, but an explaination had to come from somewhere.

You two discussed the arrangements for a couple minutes longer. From outfits to hair to transportation, you were more excited for this game than you had been for any others. Maybe it was because it was Jack’s team, or maybe it was because someone finally seemed to share your admiration for the sport.

Who knows, it was probably the latter.

The day came quick, as it was only a day or two out from your initial conversation. The tickets usually dropped in price right before the game, but luckily you didn’t have to spend the money on it regardless. You lended Cece a Zegras jersey that he got you, while you chose to wear an unnamed 30th anniversary jersey. You still had a few hoodies with Jack’s last name on the back, from his time with USNDTP, but you wouldn’t be wearing those tonight.

You arrived shortly before warm-ups, but when you looked at your section and seat numbers you realized Trevor wasn’t lying about you being right behind the bench. He just never mentioned that it was the away bench. You watched from your seat as the boys entered from the tunnel. They weren’t facing you, but you watched to make sure they didn’t turn around at least not now.

You managed to go a little while without being seen by Luke or Jack, that was until Cecelia got extremely into the game. The Devils had a goal in the late first period, opening up the scoring. Luke was sitting on the bench about a foot to the left of Cece, and once they scored she started banging on the glass.

As he stood up to cheer, he turned around due to the banging. The first thing he did was make eye contact with you. His eyebrows raised, and he blinked as if you’d disappear when his eyes opened. He didn’t say anything as you tried to avoid his gaze, and simply turned back around.

The game continued on, and you didn’t see him say anything to Jack. Soon enough, it was intermission and you felt safer. Like eyes weren’t on you anymore, even though they never were. It went by fairly quickly as the two of you watched the silly halftime games that usually were played by young children. As soon as the Devils came back through the tunnel, Jack turned around and looked at you. He kept sneaking glances as they warmed up again before the start of the second.

The rest of the game wasn’t as fun, as the brunette kept staring at you. As if you couldn’t go to hockey games, his hockey games. As if he couldn’t help looking at you. As if he missed you.

It didn’t help that Cece kept shouting at you, telling you that the cute one kept staring at you and that he wanted you. You knew her best interest was at heart, but she had no idea the magnitude of your situation with said cute one. You entertained her teasing of you, and how she kept pointing at you everytime Jack glanced your way.

By the end of the game you were over it. You wanted to escape and go home before the off chance that you ran into Jack actually happened. It was relieving when you got into the car, but startling when your phone lit up with a single message from Jack. Cece was giggling to herself, looking up one of the cute guys she saw on Instagram. She was oblivious to the situation

jack hughes : hi why were u there

You tried to think of an excuse, but eventually you realized it wouldn’t matter if you told the truth or not.

buttons 🩷 : because i was given tix my trevor.. and i go to a lot of ducks games

jack hughes : oh no other reason?

buttons 🩷 : u think i went for u?

jack hughes : maybe a little. sorry for bothering u buttons.

buttons 🩷 : don’t be sorry. how long are you in anaheim?

jack hughes : tonight n then flying up to seattle

buttons 🩷 : where r u staying?

It was a twenty minute drive back up to your apartment, but with your speeding it was around seventeen. Cece didn’t question your urgency as you dropped her off at your shared apartment, and left immediately after. She was a little bit tipsy. As you drove to the Marriott in Anaheim, you thought about what you were doing.

Throwing away years of peace for the same boy who disrupted it all those years ago. If you started to have feelings for him again, who knows how much you life could be uprooted? Everything could be ruined. All the progress and the getting over Jack. Your Jack. You knew you were risking your own personal journey by going to see him, but at this point you didn’t care.

The hotel receptionist was reluctant to let you up, as she knew who was staying there. The skepticism on her face was present from the very moment you walked in.

“Look, I know him and I know his room number, so can you just let me go up?” You pleaded with hed. Going to a room usually wasn’t necessarily an issue, the issue here was that a sports team was staying. She might’ve thought you were a crazy stalker fan.

As she was about to answer, Jack exited the elevator and spotted you talking to the receptionist. “She’s with me.” He told her, as he walked up to the desk. “Thanks, though.” You had texted him a minute prior about the receptionist, but you didn’t expect him to rush down.

“Hi.” You breathed as you made your way toward the elevator, “How’ve you been?”

“I’ve been good.” He stopped before the elevator, “Would you rather go for a drive? I’m sharing a room with Luke.”

Your story paused in a car, so you were unsure how this would turn out. Maybe it will be different this time. “Sure.” You replied softly.

You two walked to your car in silence. You were about to get in the driver’s seat, but he insisted on driving. “You should drive slow around here, there’s a bunch of cops at night because of drunk college students.” You chuckled, “I’ll tell you when you can speed.”

You buckled up, and he started your car. It was an upgrade from your Honda, being a more recent model of a Nissan. “So, why’d you come to the game?” He asked as he pulled out of the hotel’s parking lot.

“I go to a lot of Duck’s games. Trevor plays, of course I go watch him.” You started, “He offered me club tickets, and I figured they were behind his bench. They weren’t, obviously.”

“So you didn’t go for me?” He questioned once again, “I don’t believe that, Buttons.”

You rolled your eyes, “I kind of did. I’ve been while you were playing for the last three years, but I still like hockey in general.”

“I’ll believe that.” The silence sat for a little while as he drove 25 down the city roads, the radio wasn’t even playing. “Do you think we could’ve done long distance?”

You shook your head, “No, not then at least. That’s why we broke it off. Maybe now.” You said the last part quieter, just enough so that if he wasn’t paying attention he wouldn’t have heard it.

But of course he was paying attention. You were his everything before, and possibly even now.

“Now?” He questioned, “What do you mean by that?”

“When we broke up, you said our page was dog-eared. Bookmarked. It was more like a pause until we were ready and mature, or at least that’s how I took it.”

He smiled, “I remember that. Do you think we’re ready and mature?”

You shrugged, looking at him. “Maybe, just this semester and then I’m done. I chose to graduate a semester early. I could move back east, we could be closer. Even without I think we’d be mature enough for long distance.”

The chances of this moment happening just weeks before you graduated was an alignment of the stars in itself. This could be everything you wanted, without disrupting your peace.

“If you need a place to stay, you can always stay with me and Luke.” He offered, “To get on your feet, if you come back.”

“Maybe.” You hummed. His hand was resting on the gear shift, even though it was an automatic. You made a move to lay your hand on top of his, squeezing it gently.

It was a soft step in the right direction. A step to getting the love of your life back, which is what you’d wanted since the minute you broke it off. It’s been a long three years without him, he was your best friend and you intended to make up for the lost time soon enough. You wouldn’t bring up how he never contacted you either, because it was far in the past. You were both kids at the time and you can’t hold a grudge about that.

As he re-entered the hotel parking lot, you smiled at him. Your hands were now intertwined on top of the cup holder region, and you never wanted to let go. His hand was more rugged than before, matured and weathered, but it was still a comfort you had missed. He dropped it to shift the car into park.

“So, I’ll see you soon then?” He asked, as you got ready to get out. 45 minutes had passed between getting into the car and now. You conversed about your current life and your future. Your future together.

You nodded, “Yeah, hopefully. Keep in touch, okay? No ghosting me.” You stepped out of the car and walked around to the driver's side as he got out as well.

The two of you shared a hug, but exchanged little words. You could hear the cars around you, and the sounds of the city were still alive. “Bye, Jack.” You released him from your embrace.

“Bye, Buttons.” He smiled, “I’ll text you.” He turned around and walked back to the hotel as you watched, a smile gracing your features as well.

You’d love him forever, whether you got back together or not. You believed he felt the same. You were glad that Trevor had known about the seating on the tickets, and made sure they got to you. You were also glad Luke saw and recognized you. You were excited to see him. The end was over, and the new start was just beginning.

869 notes · View notes

sweetestdesire · 3 months

Text

CAUGHT IN THE ACT

WARNINGS: hair pulling, extreme domination, mentions of masturbation, degrading speech, etc. 18+ readers only

PAIRING(S): Trevor Zegras x Fem!Reader

SUMMERY: in which Trevor Zegras catches Fem!Reader in a compromising position.

"Stop fighting with me! I've been given explicit instructions, and you're going on this date whether you like it or not."

Trevor groaned dramatically as Y/N tugged on his arm. "I already showered and everything, what else am I supposed to do, Y/N?"

"Um, put on a decent outfit?"

"What if I don't even want to go?"

"Too bad. You had the opportunity to back out when Mason asked you if he could set you up, and you didn't, so now you're going." She mimed dragging him down the hallway to his room. "As your best friend and roommate, I'm in charge of making sure you show up and look good."

Heavy footsteps fell on the floor as Trevor stomped after her. "As my best friend, I'd think you'd be on my side about not wanting to go."

Y/N and Trevor had been best friends since they were kids. Growing up next door to each other, they’d spent years playing basketball in his driveway in the summer or making snow forts in her yard in the winter. Even though Trevor was two years older than her, he had always let her be part of his life. He might have teased her mercilessly, but she knew he was always there for her. He had helped her with crushes, coached her through her first date, first boyfriend, and first subsequent heartbreak.

Y/N knew people thought it was strange. Here they were, early-20s, and living together platonically. She knew a good number of people assumed they would get together one day, but Trevor had never felt that way about her. It was kind of weird, at first, to bring dates back home and to know that he was across the hall from her bedroom, able to hear every little thing that happened.

Y/N let herself into Trevor’s bedroom as he trailed behind her. “Just watch. She's going to be super hot and sexy and funny. It'll be your last first date, you'll fall in love and have eight kids and tell everyone about how it was just love at first sight. And I can be cool Auntie Y/N and ride a motorcycle and buy them alcohol when they start going to parties in high school."

"You've never even been on a motorcycle."

Y/N grinned at Trevor from across his room as he stood in the doorway, head tilted in a pout. "I'll learn to ride a motorcycle.” She said.

"I don't know why you and Mason think that I need to be dating someone." He entered the room and flopped onto his bed. "Maybe I'm happy living the single life."

"At the very least, you need to get laid, Trevor." A startled noise came from his throat and she giggled as she opened his closet, searching through his clothes. "You used to have a parade of babes coming through here. Now you're all grouchy. It's clearly sexual frustration."

"That is so very wrong. Besides, not all of us need a 'parade of babes' in our rooms. Unlike you, I like to have a night off once in awhile. Rest up, you know."

Y/N snorted. "Are you calling me a slut?"

"Nah, you already know you're a slut."

They both lost it, and she threw a shirt at him playfully between giggles. "Try this on for me."

Y/N heard him shift off the bed behind her and reluctantly begin changing as she dug through his closet for a few more outfit options.

"So who is this girl, again?"

"Mason’s friend, Lauren. I've met her a couple times, she's super pretty and really sweet. Curly hair, kind of a boho-chic vibe. Lots of flowy dresses and such."

"Not exactly my type, then?"

"I thought your type was 'has boobs.'"

"I'll have you know I'm a man of discerning tastes."

"Ah yes, of course. And what is your type, then, exactly?" Y/N turned around, arms full of clothing as Trevor finished buttoning the shirt she’d thrown at him.

"You know..." Trevor trailed off. "Sporty, kind of."

"Oh, sure." Y/N rolled her eyes. "The shirt's not doing it for me. Take that off and put on this t-shirt with this shirt over top of it."

"Yes, ma'am."

"And these jeans." She tossed the jeans across the bed.

"Are you going to watch me change?" His hands worked down the buttons as he spoke, eyes crinkling.

"Oh, excuse me while I preserve your modesty." Y/N turned sarcastically as he laughed.

"Gotta leave something to the imagination.” He said. "Okay, how does it look?"

Y/N turned back around and looked over Trevor. "You'll thank me tomorrow after she leaves." She stepped across the room, adjusting his shirt and helping him roll the sleeves up to his elbows. "Now, tuck the front in just a bit. Perfect."

Trevor spread his arms as she looked over him. "Presentable?"

He looked great. As her eyes moved up and down, Y/N had the thought that Trevor was far better looking than he had any right to be. His jeans fit nicely, held up by a nice belt. And the rolled-up sleeves of the shirt he had over it showed off his forearms and highlighted his large hands.

Okay, she hasn’t been entirely honest. Y/N’s entire life, she’d harbored a crush on Trevor. She’d also spent her entire life stuck being seen as, at most, a younger sister. He'd helped her through her first date and first boyfriend, but her first heartbreak had been the day she’d seen Trevor with his first girlfriend. Her second heartbreak had been the day he'd blushed, embarrassed, as his friends teased him about hanging out with her.

“She's just my friend.” Trevor had shouted. "I don't like her like that!"

That had been years earlier, though, and while Y/N had never fully gotten over her little crush on Trevor, she’d successfully moved on with her life. She’d dated casually, had a few relationships, and certainly had her share of one-night-stands parade through her bedroom in their apartment. She’d also learned how to sneak them out in the morning, much to Trevor’s chagrin. He loved to give them a hard time the next day.

But, back to that particular moment, where Trevor was standing in front of her, waiting for her review of his outfit. In that moment, Y/N felt the small rekindling of the torch she’d carried for him paired with the sadness of knowing she was sending him into the arms of some other woman. She pushed those feelings away quickly, and grinned up at him.

"You look amazing. Want me to make sure you've got bacon and eggs ready for breakfast tomorrow?”

Trevor swatted her arm playfully and she jumped, more out of surprise at the sudden feel of his hand against her skin. "You seem pretty sure she'll be coming back here."

"I would if I were her. I did a hell of a good job cleaning you up."

Trevor arched an eyebrow at her. "You would?"

"You know what I mean." She refused to let him fluster her. "Anyways, you're right. Maybe you won't come back here."

"Ouch."

"Maybe you'll end up at her place."

He scoffed. "Sure, we'll see about that."

Y/N had to urge Trevor out of the house in time to make it to his date. When he finally left, she sighed. She had met Lauren a few times and she was gorgeous, and funny, and always looked put together. She tried not to be jealous. Trevor had seen her in all manners of complete unsexiness, from being an awkward, gangly teenager to sweating buckets after working out to that very moment, in ratty yoga pants and a messy bun. Y/N was quite certain she'd be back at their place after the date.

Y/N wandered around the apartment aimlessly before flopping onto the couch, not used to the time alone. Trevor hadn't been out much since he’s gotten injured, and she had gotten used to having him around all the time. Suddenly, everything seemed incredibly quiet and lonely. Normally, Trevor and her would have dinner together, and then they’d watch an episode of something, and then maybe he'd play video games while she read a book or headed out for the night. It wasn't like they spent all their time together, but it certainly seemed that they’d gotten into a comfortable routine.

Her plans had fallen through for the evening, though, and Y/N hadn't bothered to make new ones. Her best friend from college was supposed to be back in town, but her flight had been delayed. She had been looking forward to seeing her, so was feeling particularly let down. Regardless, she decided to make the most of having the apartment to herself.

After showering and slipping into a comfy pair of sleep shorts and a tank top, Y/N popped a batch of popcorn for dinner. Cracking open a beer, she settled in on the couch, picking a movie she knew Trevor would never want to watch. While he preferred comedies or thrillers, she wanted love and drama.

It certainly wasn't planned that the movie she picked had a heart-droppingly gorgeous male lead that ended up in a panty-dampening sex scene with the equally erotic love interest. Watching the two of them paw at each other in a clandestine love affair was more than Y/N could handle. Between that and the reminder of her attraction to Trevor, she was in a state of full arousal by the time the movie ended.

Wiping her fingers after finishing her popcorn, she glanced down the hallway towards their rooms. Trevor wouldn't be back for a while. She was certainly not a beautiful, cat-like actress in a satin emerald dress about to be pounded against a bookshelf, but just for a moment, she wanted her own steamy scene. She flipped the TV off and shuffled through the apartment to the bathroom.

Trevor and Y/N each had their own private drawers in the bathroom, and she left a small bullet vibrator in hers for the occasional bathtub excursion. She dug it out quickly and made to go into her bedroom, but paused at the door. Glancing behind her, she eyed Trevor’s bedroom door. Her heart started pounding, strong enough that she could feel the pulse in her neck and hear the thundering in her ears.

"No.” Y/N said out loud. Her and Trevor had their own spaces. It was her best friend she was thinking about, and he didn't deserve something so disrespectful as her masturbating on his bed. Especially since he might be bringing someone back to fuck there.

Y/N started back into her own bedroom, but paused again, throwing another look over her shoulder at Trevor’s room. Then again, she said to herself, it would be incredibly hot. She didn't give herself another opportunity to back out. She opened his bedroom door and bolted into his room. Gingerly, she crawled onto his bed over top of the blankets, lying on her back with her head on his pillow.

A scent that was distinctly Trevor enveloped her. Whether it was his body wash or cologne or a mix of that with his own sweat left on the pillow didn't matter to her. Y/N closed her eyes, inhaling as she imagined having Trevor in the bed with her. Balancing the vibrator on her stomach, she wriggled her hips, sliding her panties and sleep shorts down at the same time and taking care to put them on the edge of the bed where she knew she’d find them again. She held the vibrator in one hand as she let the other caress her stomach. Her hand moved underneath the fitted tank top, sliding up her stomach to her breasts. She had forgone a bra, and the friction of her tank top against her hardened nipples was intoxicating.

Y/N took her hand away from her breasts, trailing it down to the pool of moisture between her legs. The excitement and nervousness of being in Trevor’s bed was more than she could handle. She worked her fingers against the slick lips of her pussy, dipping them just inside her dripping entrance, before turning her vibrator on and immediately pressing it to her clit.

A muted sigh escaped her lips as the vibrations relieved her intense arousal. Her breath came heavily, and Y/N pushed her hips forward just slightly, grinding back against the vibrator. Trevor’s pillow was soft under her head and his blanket was cool against her naked lower half. She spread her legs a bit more, her hand wandering back up to her breasts. Tweaking her nipple, she stifled a moan.

Y/N pictured Trevor towering above her. He had long been a prominent image in her masturbatory fantasies. The addition of being in his room, surrounded by his things and his scent and in his bed where he fucked his other girls... it was more than she could handle. She wanted him so badly in that moment. She wanted not just the lingering scent of cologne, but she wanted his body, to feel the heat of him against her, pushing inside of her.

The slow knot of an orgasm begin to unravel deep in her stomach, and Y/N tensed in anticipation. She adjusted the vibrator against her clit, waiting eagerly to cum. She was so close, so ready, just teetering on the edge of orgasmic bliss when she suddenly heard the apartment door bang closed.

"Hey, I'm back!" Trevor called out.

Y/N had never moved so fast in her life as in that moment, panic coursing through her body as she sat up. Her fingers were slick and she fumbled with her vibrator, barely managing to turn it off. She snatched up her sleep shorts as she bounded off the bed, peeked into the hallway quickly to make sure he hadn't started towards his room, and practically hurdled across the hallway into her own room. Panting, she tossed her vibrator onto a pile of clothes and rushed to slip her shorts back on, nearly tumbling over as she tried to maintain her balance.

"Y/N?" Trevor’s voice was at the end of the hallway.

She popped her head out of her bedroom door, plastering a smile on her face that probably made her look a little crazy. "Hey!" Her voice was too loud, too upbeat. "How'd your date go? Did Lauren come back?"

Trevor eyed her warily. "Uh, no. She's nice, but we didn't have a ton of chemistry. So much for a last first date."

"Awe, I'm sorry to hear that."

"Are you okay?" He frowned. "Is someone in there?"

"Nope!" A slightly obnoxious giggle bubbled out of her lips. "Just... you know, probably should have eaten a better dinner and not drank a beer. Guess I can't hold my liquor that well!"

"That's bullshit." Trevor shook his head. "You're being weird. You sure everything's okay?"

Y/N nodded, not trusting herself to speak again, as Trevor walked down the hallway and into his bedroom. Her jaw clenched as he flicked the light on.

"Okay then. I thought you'd be hounding me for details."

"Tell me everything.” Y/N said obediently. "What happened?"

"Well, she's a vegetarian, I don't know if you knew that. So we probably shouldn't have gone to a steakhouse." He took off the dress shirt as he talked to her. "Also sounds like she met some guy on vacation that she has a thing for, but he doesn't live here. Never said anything for sure, but couldn't stop talking about him."

"That sucks."

Neither of them were looking at each other, and their eyes fell on the same thing at the same time. Her stomach dropped as she realized her panties were sitting on the edge of Trevor’s bed, just as he looked confused at the misplaced scrap of pink fabric hanging off his blanket.

"Y/N, are these..." Trevor picked up her panties, frowning down at his hand. "Why are these in my room?"

She froze in horror as any number of excuses flew through her brain. They got stuck to the sheets in the wash. Haha, it's a prank, bro. None of the excuses made it out of her lips as Trevor frowned down at his bed. The blankets were just the slightest bit ruffled, and there was an indent in the pillow where her head was.

"Were you in my room?"

Y/N grasped frantically at the flimsiest of straws, hoping he would end the conversation and they would never speak of it again. "No?” She didn't know who she thought she was kidding. The panic in her voice, the flush on her cheeks and chest, and the damp pink panties in his hand were more than enough to incriminate her.

"And you're definitely not hiding someone in your room right now?" His voice was low, the sarcasm barely hidden.

Y/N’s mouth was dry as she shook her head. Trevor stepped forward, making his way into the hallway. Shaking, she took a step back into her room as he poked his head inside. He glanced around, his eyes falling on the vibrator sitting on the pile of clothes nearby.

"So you weren't fucking someone on my bed, you were masturbating on it?"

Y/N couldn't physically speak. Her throat was as frozen as the rest of her, staring at Trevor. She hoped she didn't look as terrified as she felt, but she was sure her face was pale aside from the patches of skin that she could still feel burning. Whether the burning was residual from the almost-orgasm or a new reaction to the embarrassment she was feeling, she didn't know.

"Y/N, what the fuck?"

"I'm so sorry." The words came out stuttered, barely above a hoarse whisper.

"Why would you do that?"

Tears pricked in her eyes and an invisible grip seemed to clench inside her chest. Her lips were parched and she couldn't form another sentence. Y/N shook her head, trying not to let the tears fall.

Trevor was only a few steps away, standing in her doorway, and his face softened a bit as he seemed to notice her eyes watering. "Y/N, talk to me. Tell me why."

"It's not obvious?" Her voice was strained, as Trevor’s gaze stared directly into her embarrassed soul. Her hands trembled and she balled her fingers into fists.

"You don't think you owe me an explanation?" His voice was dark again, serious.

She tried not to choke on her words, despite knowing she had just fucked up years of friendship. "Because I'm attracted to you, Trevor." The words hung between them. "And because it turned me on."

Trevor glanced down at his hand. He was still holding her panties, the fabric tight between his fingers. "Why didn't you tell me?"

Y/N swallowed hard, trying to relieve the dryness in her mouth. "I've had a crush on you my entire life. You said you didn't like me like that."

"When did I say that?"

"You said it to a couple of friends years ago. They were teasing you for hanging out with me."

"Y/N, I would have been maybe 15 when I said that." When she didn't respond, he sighed. "You never admitted this to me because of something I said when we were kids?"

"When else was I supposed to say it? When you had a girlfriend? When you were done sleeping with some random hook up?" Y/N finally managed to string together a sentence without stuttering, but it was short lived. "I did something stupid and rude tonight, I know that, I'm sorry. But I never wanted to say anything because you're my friend and I didn't want to make things weird."

"So you just rubbed one out on my bed, thinking that wasn't the definition of weird."

The words stung and she felt one of the tears escape from her eye. Y/N wiped a hand across her cheek hurriedly, staring at the floor.

"How often have you done this?"

"Just tonight."

"I'm supposed to believe that? This was the first time and I just happened to catch you?"

Another tear fell. "I'm telling the truth." Y/N went to wipe the second tear, but Trevor stopped her. His fingers wrapped around her wrist firmly, but not painfully. She still winced, but he released her wrist and his hand moved up to her cheek, wiping the tear out from under her eye.

"Do you know how difficult it is for me to listen to a string of guys fucking you from the other side of the hall?" His voice was a low growl.

"You had your own string of women to fuck.” Y/N spat back. Her face burned, angry at her eyes betrayal as another tear slipped down her cheek.

"None of them were you."

Y/N finally looked back up at him, unsure of what to say. He was so close, just inches away from her. When had that happened? His fingers brushed under her eye again, drying her cheek, and the distinct scent of Trevor that had enveloped her on his bed was filling her senses yet again.

"What are you saying?"

"It's not obvious?" Trevor taunted.

Y/N’s body didn't know how to react. Trevor was so close, tantalizingly close, and part of her yearned to press against him. Another part of her wanted to recoil, bury herself in her blankets, and sob at her mortification. It was like being an awkward kid again, when Trevor would tease her until she got angry and tried to storm off, only to tell her he was joking and beg her to stay.

She felt goosebumps rise on her arms as he looked down at her, waiting for her response. Y/N couldn't bring herself to speak and just shook her head, casting her eyes back down the floor.

"Awe, come on, Y/N." The mocking tone to his voice was familiar, but she still didn't know what he wanted to say. "Alright, tell me this. Did you cum on my bed?"

Y/N grimaced, her eyes slamming shut as more tears threatened to leak out. He laughed at her reaction. "Come on. Did you cum?"

"No.” She whispered.

"Why not?"

"You got home before I was done." Even shut, a tear managed to sneak out of her eye. She bowed her head, but again, Trevor’s hand came to her face and wiped the drop off her cheek. He tilted her head up slightly, and she reopened her eyes to look at him.

"All that, and you didn't even finish on my bed?"

"Trevor, please." Y/N’s voice cracked as she tried to hold in a sob. "I'm sorry. Please stop making fun of me."

"I'm just joking." His voice was low, husky, and his body was closer than ever. She could feel his breath on her face. "You have no idea how hot you look when you're embarrassed, but I’m sorry for making you cry."

"Is this happening?" Y/N finally managed to ask.

"Do you want it to happen?"

Y/N nodded. Trevor’s lips were suddenly on hers, his kiss demanding and insistent. She inhaled sharply as his tongue probed her mouth, exploring her lips. The gap between their bodies closed as his arms wrapped around her. His cock nudged against her, already straining against his pants.

A startled gasp escaped her mouth as he bit down on her lip. Y/N’s pulse quickened as his hands explored her body, brazenly groping at her breasts and deliberately rolling her hardened nipples between his fingers. Trevor chuckled against her mouth as she pushed against him, eager for more.

"Stop laughing at me.” Y/N hissed. He responded by pinching her nipple hard, eliciting a high-pitched cry from her.

"I'll laugh at you all I want.” Trevor replied.

His mouth covered hers again, and his hands traveled down her body. Without so much as a moment of hesitation, Trevor slipped his hands down the back of her shorts and cupped an ass cheek in each of his hands. He squeezed, kneading her ass as he pushed against her body, grinding his cock against her.

Teeth grazed her lips again and he sucked her bottom lip into his mouth. Y/N cried out and he sucked harder before letting go. His hands squeezed her ass again, his fingers gripping her hard, before he let go and took his hands out of her shorts.

"Bed.” Trevor said simply.

"Mine or yours?"

He laughed, a wicked look crossing his face. "Yours first." A hard kiss punctuated his sentence. "I've listened to you fuck a million guys in here. Now it's my turn."

A flutter ran through her body at the implication being they’d fuck on his bed later, and another at the idea of Trevor listening to her get fucked from behind the closed door of his room. Y/N directed him to sit on the edge of her bed, then stood in front of him.

"How many times did you listen to me get fucked?" She asked.

His eyes darkened. "Enough to know I could make you cum harder and scream louder than any of them." An arm extended, reaching for her, but she stepped back.

"Were you jealous?" Y/N teased.

"Incredibly."

She bit her lip and toyed with the hem of her tank top. "Did you ever jack off listening to me?" Y/N flushed a bit, her voice going quiet again.

"Almost every time." His voice was earnest, eyes full of honesty and desire. "I imagined you getting fucked in every position you can imagine. Now, can I see if your tits are like what I pictured?"

Y/N swallowed hard, unable to think of a response. Meeting his eyes, she slid the tank top up over her head, revealing her breasts to him for the first time. It was his turn to be speechless for a moment, his eyes savoring the view of her body as she stood half-naked in front of him.

"Are they what you imagined?" She finally asked.

"Better." He reached for her again, and she moved to him like a magnet to metal.

As soon as Y/N was within reach, his hands were on her tits, and she moaned softly as he cupped her breasts in his hands. She let him fondle her for just a moment, before closing the gap between them even further by straddling his lap on the edge of the bed. She steadied herself on his shoulders as Trevor took the opportunity to dip his head down, kissing the top of her breasts.

"You missed your calling as a stripper, you know.” Trevor teased, licking between her breasts.

"Pretty sure you aren't supposed to touch the strippers.” Y/N gasped. His mouth found a nipple as his hands resumed their position on her ass, and he traced his tongue around her nipples, making her shiver. She ran her hands through his hair, holding him against her chest.

"Are you saying I should stop touching you?" He murmured.

"God, no." Y/N rolled her hips against him, and they both groaned as her pussy ground against the length of his cock. The softness of her shorts provided friction against her swollen clit, and she found herself repeating the action again and again as he ravished her breasts.

It clearly was working for Trevor, too, and his mouth left her tits as his head tilted back. Y/N wanted to be greedy; she wanted his mouth back on her nipple and his cock inside her and to cum on him again and again. But she also wanted to hear the noises Trevor would make if she put his cock into her mouth.

Y/N moved off his lap, standing between his legs as she reached down and unbuckled his belt. Trevor’s hands joined hers and he unbuttoned his jeans as she carefully unzipped them. His hips moved up just enough to let her pull his jeans down, and she dropped to her knees as she guided them down his legs.

Once his pants were off, Y/N gripped his cock through his boxers. A small grunt came from his throat as she traced her fingers up and down through the fabric. He was rigid, thick, and hot. From her position kneeling in front of him, she reached up and slipped her fingers into the waistband of his boxers. She thought briefly about going slowly, tantalizing and tenderly revealing his cock, but she was too full of fire to maintain that. Instead, she pulled them down quickly, freeing his cock in one movement.

The stiff appendage jutting out towards her was beautiful. Y/N admired his cock for a moment before flicking her tongue out to taste the pre-cum that dripped from his tip. Trevor exhaled loudly as her tongue made contact, and she took his tip into her mouth in response. Hands came to her head immediately, fingers pulling at her hair as she wasted no time sucking Trevor’s cock.

His breathing came heavily as she bobbed her head, feeling the thickness of his swollen cock filling her mouth. He was quieter than she expected at first, but that changed as he began pulling her hair harder and directing her to take his cock deeper in her throat. His tip pushed against the back of her mouth and she opened her throat as much as she could, swallowing his shaft as she reached up to cup his balls.

Trevor groaned loudly as she did, his hips thrusting forward just slightly. The sounds he was making shot waves of arousal through her body, and Y/N couldn't help but slip a hand into her shorts as she sucked his cock. Her slit was drenched and a soft, humming moan vibrated against Trevor’s dick as she touched herself.

"You look so fucking hot right now."

Y/N glanced up at him, eyes wide as her lips encircled his cock. Trevor looked back down at her, able to just see her hand in her shorts. Her fingers darted into her wet pussy quickly, and she let out another muffled moan against his cock, her eyes squeezing shut.

"Fuck." His hands tightened in her hair as she took him deep in her throat.

Y/N let him thrust into her throat a few more times before pulling back and letting him slip out of her mouth with a wet sound. “I can't wait any longer.” She gasped.

"Good." Trevor helped her up off my knees, pulling her in for another searing kiss as he pushed her shorts down.

Y/N wiggled her hips, letting them fall to the floor, and tugged at his shirt. Trevor removed it swiftly, bringing it over his head and tossing it towards the floor. They shifted onto the bed together, collapsing onto the covers as their arms wrapped around each other and their lips connected again, urgent and breathless. Trevor’s cock brushed against her bare thigh, tantalizingly close to the dripping pool between her legs.

Trevor grabbed her possessively, and he twisted her onto her back, his hands wrenching her legs apart. She half-expected him to sink into her immediately and moved to stop him so she could get a condom, but instead his head dipped down and his mouth nestled against her slit.

Gasping, Y/N arched her back slightly, and Trevor went to work eating her pussy. He lapped at her wetness greedily, his tongue licking along her slit and his mouth buried against her. Feverish moans escaped from her lips with each breath as he concentrated his ministrations on her clit. His tongue danced around her, and the agonizing ascent towards orgasm began in her stomach again. The climbing sensation built and built, the promise of cumming finally within her grasp.

Y/N glanced down at the head between her thighs. An expression of bliss filled Trevor’s face, his eyes closed beneath tousled hair as he feasted on her pussy. "Don't stop.” She begged, her fingers clutching at his hair. "I'm so close. Please, Trevor.”

Trevor could’ve stopped, could’ve continued the intense teasing he'd subjected her to since catching her masturbating on his bed. To his credit, he didn't. Instead, he sucked on her clit while pushing a finger inside her and curling it to hit her G-spot.

The effect was almost instantaneous, and her thighs clamped against Trevor’s head as she came. After such a long wait and the denial of her orgasm from earlier, it was one of the most intense she’d ever experienced. Her back arched as she ground against Trevor’s face, a blistering cry filling the room as her body shook. Heat radiated from her core as she came, writhing against Trevor.

As the heat gave way to a dreamy relief, her legs released Trevor’s head. Y/N slowly became aware of his tongue still gently lapping at her pussy, and that her hands were still entangled in his hair.

"Sorry." Y/N let go of his head, still trying to catch her breath. A gentle kiss was placed on her clit, which was still so sensitive it made her twitch. Then another kiss on top of her mound, and a third above that.

"Never, ever apologize for cumming like that." Trevor’s lips brushed against her skin as he spoke. "That was like magic."

Y/N could only groan in response, her body still overwhelmed with pleasure. He crawled up her body, a look of mock concern on his face. "Did I break you?"

Another groan, and she pulled him down to kiss her. She could taste the slight sweetness of her juice on his lips. "Fuck me.” She mumbled against his mouth.

Trevor didn't reply, just nipped at her lip one last time before pulling back and grabbing her pillow. His hands guided her to her knees and she flipped over, the pillow under her stomach as she propped herself up on her hands and knees. Second later, Trevor was behind her, the tip of his cock probing at her pussy.

"Ready?" Trevor asked, though his voice was struggling, as though he couldn't possibly wait another moment.

Y/N was more than ready. "Fuck me, Trevor.” She ordered.

He buried his cock inside her in a single thrust. Both of them made noises of relief as he finally sheathed his cock inside her, and his fingers dug into her hips as he paused there.

"Fuck, you feel amazing." His voice was husky, gasping.

In response, Y/N pushed her ass back against him. He grunted and thrust back against her, penetrating as deep as he could, and she let out a lustful breath.

"Fuck me.” She begged again.

Y/N wasn't sure how he had held back for so long. When Trevor began to fuck her, there was no stopping him. She squealed as he ravaged her pussy recklessly, shoving his length as deep as he could. The pillow beneath her was excellent forethought, as it wasn't long before her arms could barely support the force of his penetrations and she collapsed onto the bed.

Trevor wasn't having it, though. The fingers digging into her hip on one side left as he hunched over her, pounding inside of her as he reached around and grabbed her breast. Using it as leverage, he pulled her back up, almost lifting her to a full kneeling position. His other hand snaked down to her clit and he fingered it furiously as his mouth found her the back of her neck, nipping the skin there.

Y/N was at his complete mercy as he tunneled inside her, filling her as deeply and roughly as he could. She was sure the entire apartment complex could hear him making her scream. He didn't have me in that position very long, despite how amazing it felt. As gently as he could, Trevor lowered her back onto the bed, pumping inside her harder and harder until she was flat on her stomach with both his hands trapped beneath her. The motion made her aware that another orgasm was approaching, and she tried to hold still as he rubbed her clit.

"Close again.” Y/N moaned. "Shit, Trevor. I'm gonna cum again."

"Fuck, Y/N.” He gasped. "I'm close. Cum for me, baby, c’mon.”

Y/N didn’t know how he did it, whether there was a slight change in the motion of his fingers or if the pinch of her nipple triggered it, but as he ordered her to cum, she did. Trapped beneath his body, she strained against him as she burst over the edge, his cock still impaling her as she rode the waves of pleasure bubbling through her body. It was in that slight moment of blissful mindlessness that she distantly heard Trevor grunt as he came, his frenzied thrusting slowing as he finished.

Trevor’s arms grasped her tightly as his weight pinned her against the bed. Y/N could feel him softening inside her as they both tried to regain their footing in reality. When it became too much, she shifted against him.

"Can't breathe.” Y/N whispered.

"Fuck, sorry." His hands slid out from beneath her and he rolled onto his back.

Y/N drew in a deep breath and flexed her fingers and feet, the tingling sensation from the aftershocks of her orgasm slowly dispelling. Propping herself up on her elbows, she looked uncertainly at Trevor as he laid naked beside her. His head was turned towards her, studying her.

"Is this a thing now?" His voice was sleepy, but reflected the same apprehension she had.

"Do you want it to be?"

Trevor nodded, extending a hand towards her, inviting her to lay closer to him. "Do you?"

"I've wanted this for years." Y/N curled up next to him, their warm skin pressing together.

"Me, too." He laid a kiss on her hair. "Rule one, though. No masturbating on my bed without me."

"Rule two. Don't give me a reason to masturbate without you."

Trevor kissed her hair again. "I won't."

The two cleaned up and crawled back in bed together, both exhausted. As Trevor’s breathing deepened, Y/N told herself to remember to thank Lauren for being his last first date.

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