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#always sunny quote
filmyocean · 1 year
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Kaz: Here's my dossier on Pekka Rollin's moves and strategies to beat him
Inej: Why are some of the pages written in crayon?
Kaz: I started compiling when I was a kid
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daddiesdrarryy · 7 months
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Pansy when Draco asks her why he’s always so fixated on Harry Potter for no reason:
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Frank Reynolds + textposts/tweets/headlines
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incorrectfmaquotes · 1 month
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Ed: how do we get out of this stomach? Ling: Oh, I know! In Scooby Doo, secret tunnels are always behind shelves and shit. Ed, pinching his nose: Could we not base our decisions on what does and doesn’t happen in episodes of Scooby Doo?
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incorrect-dnd-classes · 7 months
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Warlock: Do you think this is easy? You need years of practice to even sniff my talent for manipulation. Now, if you’ll excuse me, I have a cult that needs a charismatic leader.
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ozais-lobotomist · 26 days
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atla as iasip. been a while but we’re still alive
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gayclubsoap · 9 months
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the-oblivious-writer · 7 months
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Tara: Oh, do me a favor. Can you peel this apple for me? *she tosses the apple to Sam*
Sam: No! I'm not gonna peel an apple for you *she tosses it back to Tara*
Tara: But Y/N always does it for me...
Sam: Why does Y/N peel your apples for you??
Tara: They don't like for me to eat the apples with the skin on it. They say the skin's loaded with toxins
Sam: Okay well good news: Y/N's not here
Tara: I know they're not here and that's why I need you to do it for me please? Please?
Sam: Oh jesus- just eat it with the skin
Tara: I do not like it with the skin Sam! I am not allowwed to eat it with the skin! I am not allowwed!
Sam: Oh my god alright! If you just shut up I will peel the apple for you the way Y/N likes you to eat it. Give it to me. Give it to me! *Tara tosses her the apple*
Sam: I'll do it the way Y/N insists, okay?
Tara: Yeah :D
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wincestendgame · 2 months
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Kevin: Where's your brother, dude? Dean: We just stepped out of the shower. He'll be down in a minute. Kevin: Alright li--listen, you guys can't go... Did you just say we? Dean: What? Kevin: Did you just say "we just stepped out of the shower"? Dean: Dean: I said "he". Kevin: Kevin: Right... okay.
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Casey: I got some green paint for the beers for St. Patrick's day.
Donnie: Why not use food coloring?
Casey: Because beer is not food. When was the last time you ate a beer?
Donnie: When was the last time you drank paint?
Casey: …
Donnie: Have you been drinking paint?
Casey: ...No.
Donnie: Let me see your tongue.
Casey: *shows his tongue and it’s green*
Donnie: Oh my God, Casey!!
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sporkberries · 11 months
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I’ll never forget how unhinged he was
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incorrect-kaishinshi · 2 months
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Haibara: What the hell is that?
Conan: *dragging KID* A phantom thief I found in the dumpster.
Haibara: Well put it back, it doesn't belong to you.
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mqcmcdonald · 1 year
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wyvernslovecake · 3 months
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Zoro: Meerkats are efficient in how they update. One little chirp and they can warn a whole group of like an eagle or whatever. It doesn't need to chirp like over and over and over again.
Sanji: I'm sorry, are you schooling me on meerkat knowledge?
Zoro: Seems like I have to.
Sanji: Oh is that right?! Well first of all, smartass, they don't chirp. They chirrup.
Zoro: Oh yeah, you think you know a ton about the meerkat?😠 Well did you know that the alpha pair will scent-mark the subordinate to show that it's the leader? If they find the weak one, they'll start pissing all over it!
Sanji: Yes! Of course I know that, Moss Ball! We watched the same documentary! 😠
Zoro: Then you'd know that if we were meerkats I'd piss all over you!!
Sanji: NOT IF I PISS ON YOU FIRST!!
Zoro: YOU WOULDN'T GET THE CHANCE BECAUSE YOU WOULD BE DROWNING IN PISS!!!
Sanji: YOU WOULDN'T EVEN BE ABLE TO HIT ME BECAUSE I'D PISS IN THE ONLY STUPID EYE YOU HAVE LEFT!!!
[[everyone staring in repulsed horror]]
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incorrectfmaquotes · 3 months
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Pinako: How did this happen? Al, now a suit of armor and holding Ed, who has two less limbs than he had originally: How does anything happen? Move past it.
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shaggybeetle · 2 months
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