#also theyres SO HISTORICALLY INACCURATE

[peonycats]

Can you draw the historical character Majapahit Empire?

bruh i waited so long to answer this ask indonesia became canon

This is less of an attempt to depict Indonesia as he actually was during the Majapahit Era and more like a modern historical reenactment, thus explaining the historically inaccurate short hair lmao

BONUS:

#historically inaccurate hair is historically inaccurate #historical fashion #hws indonesia #historical hetalia #hetalia #ask #anonymous #hws philippines #mamma mia thats a huge file size #indophil #anyways thank you to my dear friend who helped me with the research for the clothes #and also that javanese bride jasmine headdress at the end!! theyre so pretty!!! #aph indonesia #aph philippines

[landoffreaksandfrogs]

what type of youtubers would the trolls be? Karkat would definitely make rants and reviews of romance movies, Kanaya would make makeup or fashion tutorials, Sollux has an IT channel he made so people stop bugging him (nobody ever bothers checking it instead of asking him)

quick spitballed ideas bc this is such a cute prompt

aradia - reviews of inaccurate halloween decoration skeletons. theyre not rated on anatomical accuracy but by how much swag they have. most of her other videos are short clips of her livevlogging her day and telling short stories, but shes funny and witty so they do numbers. very low effort and low cost, but shes having fun.

tavros - CARD PACK UNWRAPPING. guy who in no way can afford his hobby but keeps getting these card packs for his channel. surprisingly relaxing to listen to while you have him minimized in another tab while you do something else. he goes over each card in the deck and their effects as well as rarity.

sollux - basically what you said. IT guide on walking through common computer problems. horrible mic quality, but really helpful information.

karkat - ABSOLUTELY would be a movie reviewer. no facecam but for whatever reason has CRISP mic quality. somehow NEVER peaks his mic despite all the screaming he does. he loves media analysis and getting pissed off over fandom drama so hed probably also do breakdowns of scandals in fandom spheres, and somehow almost getting sued.

nepeta - SPEEDPAINTS. and like. flipnote hatena style amvs. obviously very amateur but its a very cute art style and she has no concept of copyright infringement.

kanaya - makeup tutorials and fashion reviews. would definitely be like that one youtuber who reviews the accuracy of historical fiction dresses in film and tv. everytime the virgin mothergrub is in the background of her videos her comments are spammed with "MOTH MOM REAL"

terezi - animated shitposts. like. grinchs ultimatum, garfielf, shit like that. REALLY bright colors and shitty linework with windows moviemaker transitions. no one knows who she is and shes never done a face reveal so shes a total enigma. there are deep web theories that her videos are anti-empire propaganda.

vriska - flarping tutorials. genuinely. she goes over mechanics, spells, class breakdowns, even shares stories of her own flarp campaigns. VERY passionate about it and kind of has an asshole youtuber persona. posts an apology video like once a month then goes on like nothing happened. replies to every mean comment.

equius - weightlifting videos. dead silent. just grunting and metal clanking. no editing. addresses every comment in every video. lots of heavy breathing. very uncomfortable. almost like performance art in how desolate it feels.

gamzee - cooking videos. its as bad as it sounds.

eridan - showing off everything in his hive and talking about it. his guns. his outfits. ranting about pollution. each video is an hour long. its mostly just him complaining or bragging about the stuff he owns.

feferi - has a live feed of her cuttlefish pen going constantly. posts animal care videos. posts music. does challenges. her youtube is kind of an inconsistent mish-mash of content but one thing remains: you will watch her cuttlefish.

#ask #anonymous #PHEW this was a long one let me know if you guys have any other ideas

[modernghostfare]

We need more CoD talk honestly and I'm curious to know which of the female characters has the best, most interesting story to you?

well. farah obviously shes also just the one w the most put in to it. uhh i dont care abt laswell very much shes fine i just am not super interested in her im glad shes a lesbian but thats like as far as i care about her. iskras would probably be really interesting to see more of? like just off her parentagee.. like all the multiplayer girls are fun and i love them but theyre not for like.. super deep delving into which i LIKE bc i like just coming up w hcs and such.. uhh i fucking hated park. so. i also never played black ops iii and probably wont i dont like the futuristic stuffs. ider the name of the girl in vanguard but she was also a mess of inaccurate historical stuff that i would not b able to recite u would have to ask someone else abt it all

BUT FARAH as a whole i think is just super interesting. shes very much A Commander and has some very strong morals shes just fun to look at. shes sooooo soo serious but shes still got like. a sense of humor. super easy to get along w you almost would not notice she lived in a gulag for half her childhood.

#asks #anon #i think if you spent time off with her you would immediately realize what sort of negative effects her past has had. #mainly also and most obviously in how she Almost never has time off.

[alexsaxonexposed]

stormwitchfaerie This is such fucking bullshit. Comedians make fun of everyone and everything because if u take yourself and everything else too seriously this kind of cancelling bs happens. Leave people alone. Alex isnt even doing anything to hurt anyone. This has gotten way out of hand.

Comedians DO NOT GET A FREE FUCKING PASS TO MAKE JOKES ABOUT MARGINALIZED COMMUNITIES.

I get it that you don't understand that transphobia isn't just murdering/assaulting trans people.

Do you know what I've been doing here? Helping trans fans, who are hurt by his actions. Because, yes, liking transphobic tweets and following transphobic people hurts his trans fans. Blocking them doesn't help either.

Funny how you ignored everything I said on that post. THIS ISN'T CANCELLING. Do the big letters help? Or can you still not understand it? He had an opportunity to explain himself and instead he blocked people and tried to pretend like it didn't happen

This is from GLAAD. Are you really gonna say that GLAAD is overreacting? Do you understand that even "jokes" against marginalized communities are not actually "jokes" to us?

This is only overreacting to you because you don't actually care about trans people. And since you don't I will say this more clearly. Get the fuck off my page because it clearly isn't for you.

stormwitchfaerie: He's literally doing nothing. These people arent even transphobic. Theyre making fun of the cancelling of people who

Liking tweets and supporting the platforms of awful bigotted people isn't doing nothing. Blocking people when they point out their disappointment in you liking a transphobic tweet and following transphobic people isn't doing doing nothing.

I literally don't know who told you this, but they lied to you. These people are transphobic and have done more than just make fun of cancel culture.

JK Rowling has been known for her transphobic views since before cancel culture was a thing. Also the fact that she's racist, antisemitic, homophobic, etc.

Dr Jordan B Peterson is literally well known as being part of the starting block of the alt-right pipeline. He is not the only person on his follow list that are a part of it. He's made his sexism, fatphobia, and transphobia extremely clear. Also that he's against climate change.

Ben Shapiro says that homosexuality and being transgender is a mental illness and a sin. When Elliot Page came out he referred to it as "pathetic, creepy, and disgusting." He is against same-sex couples adopting children. And so much more. These things are all transphobic and homophobic

Quillette/Claire Lehmann: Putting these two together because Lehmann founded Quillette and she pops up enough in Saxon's likes. Quillette is a magazine founded by Lehmann that was initially focused on science. Transphobic (poses the idea that "transgenderism is dangerous") and also against feminism because "men are the real victims." Someone once sent a fake article and they published it without fact checking. 

Glenn Greenwald: Transphobic: claimed that trans and non-binary people are actually cis lesbians who are being pressured to identify as trans/non-binary. Chelsea Manning, a trans woman, openly spoke out against him and he retaliated by publishing private DMs from her in his replies. Biphobic: categorizes bisexual relationships as "hetero-appearing" and "gay/lesbian-appearing."

Ian Miles Cheong: Transphobic--misgendered trans women, publicly shames non-binary as an identity in doubting its existence (Call of Duty once had an option for Male, Female, and Non-Binary and he publicly called it "historically inaccurate", etc). 

Kara Danksy: Transphobic. Profile is cut off, but I feel it illustrates everything perfectly: Feminist fighting for the sex-based rights of women and girls. Publicly speaking out about the 'gender identity' industry. All tweets my own. Furthermore, she published a book in November of 2021: "The Abolition of Sex: How the 'Transgender' Agenda Harms Women and Girls." The title speaks for itself.

All of these are transphobic actions and not the only ones that they have committed. They probably aren't even the only bigotted actions they've committed. And I'm sure you'll notice that none of these people are comedians. Although I should repeat that even if they were, comedians do not actually get a free-pass to say bigotted things as a joke. Especially when they are not a part of the punchline.

Their actions hurt the trans community. He hurt his trans audience. Instead of spewing bullshit and trying to defend a man that you will never meet and will never actually care about what you say, try listening and seeing why people are upset.

But since you seem incapable of understanding the fact that this type of behavior causes damage. I will help you out. Here's some fan reactions by both trans audience members and actual allies

(Side Note: if anyone that is in these photos would like them removed please let me know and I'll do it)

There's a lot more where that came from. Check out our Twitter. Since the likes are public you'll have no problem finding these and more if you scroll down a bit. https://twitter.com/SaxonExposed

And if you still have a problem and don't understand the accountability I'm searching for. Just get off my page. Just get off. It's simple. You don't care about what I, the other mod, trans fans, and actual trans allies are doing when we call him out on this shit. It'll save us all time if you just left.

I mean I'm gonna block you again, right after I post this. But again you can just leave and ignore us. That's what Alex is doing to the people who call him out anyway, take a page out of his book.

~ Lachesis

#Literally just leave if you choose to be this obtuse that you think any of the fucks that he follows aren't transphobic #a simple google search with their names and transphobia (and more) proves you wrong

[soldier-poet-king]

Am I the only one who grew up a weird Christian kid but DIDNT watch veggietales?? Like I have a vague knowledge of it from tumblr, largely just the hairbrush song, but the Wholesome Christian Media(TM) that I was forced to consume was zondervan kid's storykeepers series. We owned ALL the episodes on DVD. On car rides and holidays y'know what we were allowed to watch??? Just that. I can probably to this day quote them from memory.

#also theyres SO HISTORICALLY INACCURATE #like early Christians in rome #but also going on to study classics im just. yells #do u know the embarassment of pronouncing ostia wrong in a convo with yr prof because the only place youd heard it pronounced #was in christians childrens tv #on the other hand the voice that narrates the gospels in my head is that voice and that voice only

[dykesymmetry]

I'm sorry to tell you but I would love to hear about the historical inaccuracies and all of your qualms with the pirate au with naval captain techno and this is your blog on a site you presumably come onto to enjoy yourself so you genuinely should have to worry about offending people with your thoughts and opinions so long as you're respectful and acknowledge their efforts before listing what was done wrong so they can learn :// /gen

WAH ok ok. uh. this is not gonna be a super serious rant bc i dont have any actual issues w the fic and its very well-written and if u like shit like potc or whatever u should definitely read it bc its very fun. that being said thats also MY special interest theyre butchering so im just gonna like. infodump about golden age of piracy below the cut

gonna start this off rq by saying im ignoring any obviously fantastical elements like erets magic or the weird storm at the beginning cause like. idrc about adding in fantasy shit, my own pirate au has like. piglins and shit. its fine idc

ok first major point is like. general characterization. which i dont honestly think is the fault of the writer misunderstanding the characters or anything, i think its more just the general assumption that pirates were all lawless renegades and the navy were idealistic men or something, in which case, lil bastard shit philza would fit the pirate role better while deeply ideological techno would fit the navy. but. i find it really fucking hard to believe that a character whos anarchist ideals make up a big portion of his motivations would be a bootlicker. and he honestly fits pretty well into the role of pirate captain? a big part of like. piracy in general. was creating this terrifying image of yourself, bc realistically you didnt want to get in a fight with every ship, that costs ammo and ship repairs and possibly lives. and i think technoblade, someone who is usually known as The Blade and who has a reputation for just being. super fucking bloodthirsty. but in reality has deepseated ideals and is determined to protect his friends at all costs, would fit way better into the role of pirate captain than phils casual war criminal self would (to be clear: i aint saying phil wouldnt be a pirate, he absolutely would. im just saying hed be a kinda shit captain tbh)

second point: pirate crews did not have the same highly hierarchical approach to roles on a ship as the navy did. to the writers credit, they kinda touched on this in ch 3 when they mentioned that the mens loyalty would still lie w phil rather than techno, but like. pirate captains werent just put into place like that, and certainly not by the previous captain. they were generally elected by the crew, who could then elect someone else if they didnt live up to their standards. also, when someone joined the crew, there'd be this whole captains code thing that theyd have to read and sign (admittedly, i know why they didnt put that part in, paperwork is boring im not faulting them for that)

along the same lines as the hierarchical shit, there wasnt really a first mate, at least in terms of like. "second in command." what there Was was a quartermaster, someone who kinda like. relayed messages between the crew and captain. again, not a huge grievance, just something that kept bugging me every time they mentioned it

another rather small grievance but one that bugged me nonetheless: at the end of ch 3, they had this moment where techno looked up at their colors and had a minute of Self Reflection that i completely ignored bc like. you would absolutely not just sail around w the black raised you are a sitting fucking target and it gives any navy vessel/pirate hunters just like. a dead giveaway that you should be attacked. youd only raise the colors if you were like. actively chasing a prize

ALSO while we're at it. this ones not a historical inaccuracy but is more of just a missed opportunity. not everyone had the same flag! most pirate captains had their own unique designs, some a bit more. goofy. than others

in phil and my au, techno has a flag similar to calico jacks (top right), but with a pig skull instead of a humans. again, its not entirely historically inaccurate, but it wouldve been cool to see what their ideas were for a unique philza flag

ok my last major issue here and one i wanted to save for last bc its a bit more graphic than others: corporal punishment (pogchamp!). im gonna be honest, im not super familiar w what could and couldnt get you punished w the royal navy, But what i do know is that the whole. cutting off a hand thing. would not be super accurate. if he was punished, hed likely be whipped (probably w a cat o nines which are like. super fucking brutal. not a fun time in the slightest). amputations were more of a "whoops you got an infection and this is the 18th century so our treatment is just to Chop" thing

#tw torture #negativity #? i dont wanna be rude i just like pirates man #ask to tag #oh and like. this isnt a 'they should know/research this stuff' its a fucking minceraft fanfic i know theyre not gonna research its fine #i just wanna rant

[veeranger]

not defending the new call of duty here cuz i genuinely dont care and i hope it flops at launch but people getting insanely up in arms about the guns not being completely perfectly 110% accurate to the real life firearms used in world war 2 are first of all maybe a little too obsessed with guns for their own good but more importantly are forgetting that call of duty is a video game and not a fucking textbook so things like fun and game balance are going to trump perfect realistic accuracy in depictions of firearms that literally the vast majority of people playing this game have never even seen in real life.

also when i see people screaming and shitting their pants over inaccurate gun models and shit all i can think about is that the more they scream about it the more activision is going to make their poor fucking developers spend 60 hours a week modeling the most pixel perfectly accurate shit that again 99% of players wont actually notice or care about until theyre told they need to be mad about it by a youtuber who makes 6 figures a year ranting about video games and how much more unreasonably harder youre making the jobs of developers who already have to shit out a full game every 12 months. id rather those developers get to go home and see their families and not be chained to their desks instead of them making the most historically accurate shitty arcade war simulator ever made thats exactly the same as the last 15 shitty arcade war simulators.

#Apple Post

[urmomsstuntdouble]

congrats on 100! is it possible for you to write some headcanons for china?

of course! and ty! also, quick shoutout to @mysticalmusicwhispers for some of the inspiration for this :)

He is a firm believer in the concept of chaotic time (i will be discussing various interpretations of time as they are described in The Fourth Turning by Neil Howe and William Strauss, as their books about American generations live rent free in my brain), which is defined as “history having no path. Events follow one another randomly, and any effort to impute meaning to their whirligig succession is hopeless.” It’s sort of the original way that people percieved time, and this interpretation of time can be found in a lot of indigenous cultures, as well as in popular nihilism. I think part of why Yao thinks this is because of all the changes in political leadership he’s had throughout his life, which prevent him from being able to apply an overall narrative to the universe. This can make some things like diplomacy a little difficult for him, as many of the other world powers are proponents of linear time- The idea of “time as a unique (and usually progressing) story with an absolute beginning and an absolute end.” 

That’s not to say that Yao is terrible at diplomacy- He’s actually very good at it, and can talk people into buying just about anything from him. 

He has an entire house that’s just filled with his old stuff. Clothes, pottery, paintings, manuscripts, trinkets, et cetera. It’s not very organized, though, and some things can never be moved because if somebody were to touch them, the objects might get damaged. 

His weapon of choice is a gùn staff, when it comes to gun-less fighting. I think he likes to bop people on the head with it when they’re being annoying. 

This is sort of based on some ancient chinese military history that i don’t fully recall so I’m not sure what to type into google but. very deadly with the gùn. 

On that note, he’s very well practiced in both Northern and Southern style Shaolin kung fu, but you probably wouldn’t know that unless you’d been around him for a while. He gives me massive “old person doing tai chi in the park” vibes. Where kung fu is concerned, I think his favorite animal thingy would be the crane? I feel like he’d really like a lot of crane forms even though he’s a bit short for it. (also im very sorry if im getting this wrong or talking about it in the wrong way! i pracitce shaolin kung fu, although i haven’t been able to really engage with it during the pandemic, so my memory might not be 10/10)

His spice tolerance?? through the roof. The things this man eats could kill a human

To me, Yao feels like one of the most human characters in hetalia, because he’s the oldest. Part of this is just because he’s the oldest, so he’s been through the most stuff- While other prominent characters are depicted as being kind of messy young adults who haven’t figured everything out yet, Yao has a calmness about him due to his age. Don’t get me wrong he’s still a bit messy, but he’s messy by choice?? like. from @peonycats latest china drawing. that was voluntary. But at the same time, I think he could fit the wise old mentor trope if he had the patience to be a mentor. He’s lived through so much that he has experience with pretty much everything one could encounter. This is also a double edged sword, because it can make him a bit impatient, especially with things he feels he’s already seen and done before. Sometimes he’s just over it, ya know? (side note i feel like that’s smth he’d be able to bond with India over- being done with all these modern kids who want to do stuff that he’s just endlessly bored by.)

He has a love-hate relationship with C-dramas. On the one hand, they’re interesting stories and imbue nostalgia. On the other hand, they can be super historically inaccurate at times- One complaint I’ve heard is that the hairstyles are often inaccurate for the sake of making the actors look really pretty. 

short king

His government is often wary and not trusting of him, because they see him as being a sort of relic from previous times. Like a potential threat to their sovereignty? idk, just. mutual distrust. 

idk where this came from but I’ve seen the hc that one time the italy brothers were like yo you knew our grandpa right? we just wanna talk- and then china goes yah we used to fuck and i think that’s so funny

He nibbles at his food, eating sort of like a bird, and does the same with water. 

Despite being kind of thin himself, will absolutely pester the shit out of his kids (even if theyre on bad terms) for not eating enough. in the same breath he’ll also berate them for eating unhealthily, and take huge offense if they won’t eat his food. like even if they’re just not hungry that time yao will develop a grudge and he’ll make sure you remember that you didn’t want to eat his food that one time. how rude of you >:(

i probably have more thoughts but theyre either too jumbled/not well worded in my brain or not present at the moment. i hope you enjoyed these!

writing requests

#i hope that was snazzy for ya! #yao feels very prickly to but maybe that's because mandarin sounds pointy to me #its a spiky language! #but anyway Enjoy #hetalia #hws #hws china #hws hc #writing requests #ceros posting

[ao3feed-crimeboys]

Fate Be Changed

by mangaisliterature

To be or not to be. Such simple words for fate, especially the fate of such miserable beings forced to tread the lands the gods watch over. Technoblade God of War and Minor of Blood abandoned his duties and is to collect souls for the Goddess of Death one of the souls being a young boy from the slums, hair of gold, and a brash nature.

or Two gods get attached to two humans and can't bring themselves to leave.

Words: 1075, Chapters: 1/?, Language: English

Fandoms: Video Blogging RPF, DreamSMP

Rating: Teen And Up Audiences

Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence

Characters: Technoblade (Video Blogging RPF), Phil Watson (Video Blogging RPF), TommyInnit (Video Blogging RPF), Wilbur Soot, Mumza

Relationships: Wilbur Soot & Technoblade & TommyInnit & Phil Watson, Technoblade & Phil Watson (Video Blogging RPF), Wilbur Soot & TommyInnit

Additional Tags: Alternate Universe - Historical, Alternate Universe - Gods & Goddesses, Probably Historically Inaccurate, techno does god things, philza also does god things, 4/4 sbi, i dont know what im doing, hi, How does this work, sbi brainrot yes yes, might have angst i havent decided, I was just in a silly goofy mood, Technoblade-centric (Video Blogging RPF), Blood God Technoblade (Video Blogging RPF), Sleepy Bois Inc-centric, no for the last time you can't adopt the children Philza, Immortal Technoblade (Video Blogging RPF), Immortal Phil Watson (Video Blogging RPF), Winged Phil Watson (Video Blogging RPF), Mumza - Freeform, Goddess of Death Kristin Rosales Watson, not using real names weird champ, Theyre gods because i said so

source https://archiveofourown.org/works/36402583

#IFTTT #ao3feed #wilbur soot #tommyinnit #crimeboys #crime boys #crimebois #crime bois #mcyt

[witchofeindor]

Can't say i liked hatari tbh. Theyre super hypocritical, and support bds movements, and i feel bad just looking at them. Theu also said Israel was built on a lie and i may not be jewish but this statement reeks of antisemitism, doesn't it?

Well, they are doing a VERY bad job at supporting bds then lmfao

supporting bdsm, maybe, not not bds lol

also that is a very antisemitic statement not to mention ABSOLUTELY historically inaccurate but I must admit I know nothing about the band beyond the fact that 1) their number was great 2) they’re from Iceland lol so like, no opinion on them beyond what I’ve just said

But yeah I defo see why you are uncomfortable, 100%

#it's just that I was raised by deeply mistrusting & traumatised Soviet Jewish parents #and they raised me to assume everyone is antisemitic unless proven otherwise so like #no surprise there lol #ask #anon #reply #Anonymous

[cielospeaks]

tbh i think w go what it is, is early on there wasnt much super complicated lore abt the series- i mean there was, there always has been but it wasnt as prominent imo. theres just the classes, and like “any real or fictional historical/mythology/whatever 100 years or older person can appear” thing. (which is ironic bc theyve broken that w voyager being from the 70s and therefore too young, but then again theyve also broken the god rule probably). and bc that was the thing i was rlly hyped like “oh boy i cant wait to see himiko! or ikkyu!” and even the leak list ones i was hyped for, like ivan, bc i wanted to see what theyd do with them.

as opposed to now, there are literally no consistent rules and its literally just “whatever turns on the head writer is canon and anything else isnt” and its super annoying. i dont even mean like suggestive things (the thing abt shutting down artists if their character designs werent uncomfortably sexual enough is really unscrupulous, but thats less my point), just like the constant fake angst and abuse of certain characters for the sake of the plot. its kinda like that old “x character has depression and thats why theyre beautiful” that is just utter bullshit and insulting. they wanted to make all shakespeare characters fictional despite that many are real people. whatcha gonna do look at richard the thirds real dead corpse and say “no ur in a play so you dont exist” and just faze his skeleton out of existence? thats what they did to taira no kagekiyo. theyve had characters that were “not real person” before like kojiro and robin (tbh robin makes sense, bc its uncertain if robin hood really existed). i remember being pissed off abt hl bc they said neither are “strong enough” to be summoned as a servant (first of all fuck you, lobo at least is a real person, er wolf) but at least that isnt fucking erasing a real ass dead persons existence. the sal thing makes sense, what with the fictional “salieri” from amadeus/ect being more well known, but that fucking contradicts the “shakes charas are fictional so they dont exist” thing also. for all purposes fictional salieri is fictional so sal should be free from that inaccurate nonsense. heck vlad too, if we’re gettin technical, that homeboy shouldnt have to deal with any vampire shenanigans bc dracula is a fucking fictional character, even in universe.

besides that, just the writing/tone is rlly. no. a lot of the time. the story always assumes you sympathize w characters over others, and is really skewed- maybe not as much as f-h is regarding the direct main cast (the forced shipping w the worst person ever who fucking treats you like his plaything) but def w other characters (5.2 you can eat ass and heck off). i dont give af abt anyone in lb6 for instance, most of my caring abt garebear is based on just regular plain gareth bc thats the one i know. they didnt give any characters any impact and made most of the major characters just npcs rather than even based on a legend like the knights (how cool would itve been if they had like....the demon from freischutz and like... other somewhat mythological monsters instead. i mean like i have puck already, what if they had like a dullahan or the fucking loch ness monster, or ariel from the tempest, and just had an awesome british isles monster party? we couldve had it all)

#negative #im just ranting lol #honestly ive tried everything #i think its just hard for me to enjoy this game anymore #im not its target audience even by a little #i dont like difficulty spike i dont like generically attractive op characters #i dont like badly written twist endings/villains

[festeringfae]

We hit the thirty minute mark! We did it kids! There is only half an hour left in this movie!  (You know what else is at the thirty minute mark? You’ve met the Wilhelm Scream, now get ready for: The Winslet Scream! A scene transition that consists of Kate Winslet reacting to a piece of bad news by letting out a primal scream, with the camera ZOOMING DOWN HER THROAT.)

This. movie. got. an. Oscar. nom. for. Best. Screen. Play.

i know the context the writers and directors went into this with was that everyone thought these girls were the spawn of satan and that they were going to have to talk them into viewing them as human beings but also not downplay why they felt they only had each other let alone the horrific crime they committed, but like........it is doing a REALLY BAD JOB at making me feel sympathetic for a 14 year old girl who has completely deluded herself into thinking this rich family who doesn’t even want her around loves her as a second daughter, and like. THAT IS AN IMPRESSIVE THING TO MAKE ME FEEL NO SYMPATHY FOR. LIKE. IS IT ME? IS SOMETHING WRONG WITH ME? CAN I NOT HANDLE NUANCE AND THE MOVIE HAS NUANCE? I FEEL LIKE THIS MOVIE COULD HAVE NUANCE EVEN THOUGH THE PREVIOUS SHOT WAS LITERALLY KATE WINSLET SCREAMING IN CLOSE UP AS A TRANSITION. MAYBE THE REAL PERSON ACTUALLY DID JUST SCREAM LIKE TAHT, I DON’T KNOW. oh, my bad, she’s actually 15 now. the movie never mentioned her birthday, or how/if she celebrated, or if there was issues with juliet being allowed to come, or-- you get it. they do a good job of the choice to make the only clearly-sympathetic parent ironically be the one who is killed. like, i’m not sure whether historically speaking tahts a GOOD choice, but they clearly called that shot and got it through the hoop. ok no. hold up. hold the phone. so theyre doing the diary narration. and its talking about Not The Mom, and then IN THE SCENE, the mom touches pauline’s cheek and says you can still write to her, and then THEY PICK UP THE DIARY NARRATION AGAIN SAYING “MY ANGER FLARED AT MOTHER” WHICH LIKE HER MOM OBVIOUSLY DIDN’T TOUCH HER CHEEK WHILE SHE WAS IN THE MIDDLE OF WRITING THAT SO WHAT PROMPTED THE ANGER AT HER MOM? HER MOM IS NOT INVOLVED IN HER FRIEND’S PARENTS’ DIVORCE. WE DON’T EVEN KNOW HOW SHE KNOWS HER FRIEND IS MOVING, WE DIDN’T GET THAT SCENE. and then it lets the diary continue that it flared at mother because she had always been an obstacle in my path and im like path to what? okay yes we are getting into motive finally and the diary is like “if i could just get rid of mother, then--” AND TEH SCENE CUTS OFF THE DIARY READING LIKE HI EXCUSE ME THE PURPOSE OF THIS FILM IS WHY THEY DID IT, YES? SHE WAS JUST ABOUT TO SAY THAT. I HAVE BEEN WAITING THE RUN TIME OF THIS FILM TO FIND OUT WHY THIS TEENAGER KILLS HER MOM. YOU DIDN’T EVEN CUT IT OFF FOR SUSPENSE PURPOSES I DON’T THINK. Now we’re just at....Juliet’s dad’s.....idk, graduation? a graduation at a place where he teaches? a leaving the college function where they make u wear your regalia for some reason?  ....they.....gave him a goodbye painting......of himself.....at a goodbye ceremony of some kind.....after they fired him by asking him to quit and find another position? this isn’t even plot holes or things that seem historically inaccurate, it just feels like the media equivalent of trying to watch something but you keep blinking something into your eye that you can’t get out so its distracting AND distorting your vision too much to focus on what’s going on OKAY, NO, FUCK. THIS IS. THIS IS THE FIRST SCENE THAT I VIVIDLY REMEMBER FROM BEING 15. AKA THE AGE THE GIRLS ARE, YIKES. AND THERE ARE ONLY 28 MINUTES LEFT IN THE MOVIE. AND I STILL TRULY FEEL LIKE I HAVE MISSED....MAYBE TEN MINUTES WORTH OF MATERIAL THAT IS ACTUALLY RELEVANT TO THE MURDER [WHICH IS THE ONLY STORY I CAN ASSUME JACKSON IS TRYING TO TELL, BECAUSE I DONT KNOW WHAT ANOTHER ONE COULD BE. PLEASE INSERT YOUR OWN JOKE ABOUT THE SECRET HISTORY AND THE ONE STORY ILL EVER BE ABLE TO TELL HERE. HOPEFULLY THAT IS NOT POOR TASTE TO SAY, I AM VERY SORRY IF SO.] thinking about how they kissed on the lips again for the first time in fucking AGES right before the ‘we can’t bare to be separated and we will kill if you do’ subplot started.................This Movie Condemns Lesbians (Because It Equates Them With Murderers) I really cannot get over how i thought i had to fucking watch this whole movie to critique it fairly when in fact the movie only fucking starts in the 20 minutes i caught on tv one time in tenth grade!!!!!!!! yeah.....this is on the diary which is not their fault unless they’re leaving shit out (doubtful) but there’s still no actual motive for why she thinks killing her mom will allow her to go run away to hollywood with juliet. it is probably because she’s very obviously not in her right mind? i think i am only bawkling at this because, coming in when i did the first time i watched it, i always assumed there was like. A Reason They Thought Killing Her Might Let Them Stay Together.  THE MOM, VERY UPSET, HAS SAID THAT HER DAUGHTER HASN’T SPOKEN TO HER IN NEARLY 2 WEEKS. I LITERALLY DONT KNOW IF THOSE 2 WEEKS STARTED THE DAY SHE FOUND OUT JULIET WAS MOVING OR IF THEYVE KNOWN FOR 2 WEEKS AND ARE ONLY HAVING THIS PARENTAL COUNSEL NOW. WHAT WAS THE POINT OF GIVING US THE DATE WHERE JULIET CAUGHT HER MOM CHEATING IF WE DO NOT KNOW THE TIMELINE IN ANY OTHER WAY.

#hell creatures lb

[ao3feed-lams]

Lost Things to the Common Eye

read it on AO3 at http://ift.tt/2vaY14B

by dorkatron_3000

John Laurens was not a normal kid. Oh sure, he played with is friends and made jokes and was incredibly smart but... there was always something off about him. He never played with girls, in any sense of the word. They didn't interest him in the slightest. His father, Henry Laurens, would inroduce a pretty, rich girl, she would flirt, pull out all the stops, and John simply said a greeting and left to be with all his (male) friends. The only girls he loved were his sisters Martha and Mary, who meant everything in the world to him, until he left home of course. They understood John better than he did himself. They would never spill his secrets, no matter how vile. Then again, one was one and a half when he had last seen her and the other twelve.

John was content, if a little anxious to go back to America to fight in the Revolution and try to free slaves. Then he made the worst decision of his life. He met Martha Manning. And then, debatably worst, met Alexander Hamilton.

Words: 1182, Chapters: 1/?, Language: English

Fandoms: Hamilton - Miranda

Rating: Not Rated

Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death

Categories: F/M, M/M

Characters: John Laurens, Alexander Hamilton, Martha Manning, Henry Laurens, Gilbert du Motier Marquis de Lafayette, Richard Kidder Meade (1746-1805), George Washington, Martha Washington, Frances Laurens, Mary Laurens, Martha Laurens Ramsay, Charles Lee, Other Character Tags to Be Added, Original Characters, Francis Kinloch (1755–1826)

Relationships: Alexander Hamilton/John Laurens, John Laurens/Martha Manning, Alexander Hamilton/Elizabeth "Eliza" Schuyler, Adrienne de Lafayette/Gilbert du Motier Marquis de Lafayette (mentioned), George Washington/Martha Washington, to be added?, Francis Kinloch/ John Laurens (one-sided but not abusively)

Additional Tags: yo yo yo what time is it, show time, my very first hamilfic, and my first ao3 fic, so dont expect greatness, im not toooooooo bad though, hamilton yall, its pretty great, honestly I'll probably make accidental references, its a small obsession of sorts, it will dull down eventually, hopefully, also this is really sad sometimes, but also really happy, its an emotional rollercoaster, at least i think it will be, im no good at tagging, I love feedback, feed the beast, Historically Accurate, but also completely inaccurate, a lot of history breaking, john is so impossibly gay, we already knew that though, and hammie is really bi, and theyre both really flirtatious, there is A LOT of meaningless flirting, also featuring Laf being the best son to Washington, surrogate son at least, its cute, i will reference the time they napped under a tree together, wow i just rediscovered how gay John is and WOW, like Martha Manning might have been a rebound, and trying to deny his sexuality, because francis kinloch essentially broke up with him, they both seemed pretty romantically involved, but then political fallout happened, Hamilton - Freeform, am I right, also just life is pretty crazy

read it on AO3 at http://ift.tt/2vaY14B

#IFTTT #ao3feed #fanfic #Hamilton #lams

[ao3feed-hamilton]

by dorkatron_3000

John Laurens was not a normal kid. Oh sure, he played with is friends and made jokes and was incredibly smart but... there was always something off about him. He never played with girls, in any sense of the word. They didn't interest him in the slightest. His father, Henry Laurens, would inroduce a pretty, rich girl, she would flirt, pull out all the stops, and John simply said a greeting and left to be with all his (male) friends. The only girls he loved were his sisters Martha and Mary, who meant everything in the world to him, until he left home of course. They understood John better than he did himself. They would never spill his secrets, no matter how vile. Then again, one was one and a half when he had last seen her and the other twelve.

John was content, if a little anxious to go back to America to fight in the Revolution and try to free slaves. Then he made the worst decision of his life. He met Martha Manning. And then, debatably worst, met Alexander Hamilton.

Words: 1176, Chapters: 1/?, Language: English

Fandoms: Hamilton - Miranda

Rating: Not Rated

Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death

Categories: F/M, M/M

Characters: John Laurens, Alexander Hamilton, Martha Manning, Henry Laurens, Gilbert du Motier Marquis de Lafayette, Richard Kidder Meade (1746-1805), George Washington, Martha Washington, Frances Laurens, Mary Laurens, Martha Laurens Ramsay, Charles Lee, Other Character Tags to Be Added, Original Characters, Francis Kinloch (1755–1826)

Relationships: Alexander Hamilton/John Laurens, John Laurens/Martha Manning, Alexander Hamilton/Elizabeth "Eliza" Schuyler, Adrienne de Lafayette/Gilbert du Motier Marquis de Lafayette (mentioned), George Washington/Martha Washington, to be added?, Francis Kinloch/ John Laurens (one-sided but not abusively)

Additional Tags: yo yo yo what time is it, show time, my very first hamilfic, and my first ao3 fic, so dont expect greatness, im not toooooooo bad though, hamilton yall, its pretty great, honestly I'll probably make accidental references, its a small obsession of sorts, it will dull down eventually, hopefully, also this is really sad sometimes, but also really happy, its an emotional rollercoaster, at least i think it will be, im no good at tagging, I love feedback, feed the beast, Historically Accurate, but also completely inaccurate, a lot of history breaking, john is so impossibly gay, we already knew that though, and hammie is really bi, and theyre both really flirtatious, there is A LOT of meaningless flirting, also featuring Laf being the best son to Washington, surrogate son at least, its cute, i will reference the time they napped under a tree together, wow i just rediscovered how gay John is and WOW, like Martha Manning might have been a rebound, and trying to deny his sexuality, because francis kinloch essentially broke up with him, they both seemed pretty romantically involved, but then political fallout happened, Hamilton - Freeform, am I right, also just life is pretty crazy

from AO3 works tagged 'Hamilton - Miranda' http://ift.tt/2vaY14B

#IFTTT #ao3feed #Hamilton #fanfic

[bittererlemons]

tittletattles replied to your post “curseworm: cishets love the new “queer not lgbt !!!!” shit cause now...”

how many times do trans, nonbinary, mspec, aspec, and literally anyone who isnt a cis lg got to tell you nobody who isnt actually an oppressed identity would just pretend to be an oppressed identity. no actually cis person would go this hard to pretend to be trans. no actually straight person would go this hard to pretend to be not straight. its also, yknow, historically inaccurate and insensitive  also @ the people claiming its unhelpful and tells you nothing about the person: t h a t s t h e p o i n t ? ? youre not entitled to hear every little detail of a persons identity, you shouldnt be, not in the lgbt+ community of all places. people have different experiences but if someone says theyre queer its really shitty of you to get hung up on who they like to fuck, who they like to kiss, whats in their pants, what they want to be in their pants, etc etc etc.. stop - trans nb queer

Hey buddy, are you mad because some of us don’t want to be called a slur? Or are you mad that some of us are sick of people calling lesbians “qu//r woman” just so they don’t have to say Lesbian? Or are you just mad because a stranger on the world wide web has an opinion that doesn’t align with yours? 

#also the whole historical inaccuracy point im laughing so hard im literally a goddamn history teacher but go off