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#also it’s not even done and i can edit it so i think i just have to chill
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Skin-Deep Chapter 1
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summary: The one where you fall for Seungcheol amongst all the protests and insecurities. The one where you don't know that he's fallen for you too.
A/N: my very first fic ever. not proofread, except by my obsessive editing. this is just chapter 1, so it's going to be a series :D . please bear with me, I have the entire draft done already and depending on the reception I may release the other chapters. also you can probably tell from my grammar where I'm from D: .
All you could think about was the music. So loud that you could barely hear your own thoughts, so loud that it made this random individual standing too close to you think that it was alright to speak into your ear. You could literally feel their breath down your ear canal and their spit on your neck. The lack of distance between your bodies was making it hard to breath and you felt too warm to be comfortable. 
You did not ask for this conversation, this person just thought you looked “lonely". Sure, standing in the corner next to the lamp and a vase made you look odd, but you were very content standing in the corner unnoticed, very content scrolling through Pinterest, very content left on your own. 
You watched as their mouth moved, hearing nothing but “finance” and “investment”. On second thought, maybe you were thankful for the loud pounding in your ear, not wanting to subject yourself to this conversation even in a library. Occasionally throwing in a smile or nod when they looked expectant of a reaction, you tried your best to discreetly text Mingyu to come and save you. 
Just as you were about to hit send on a poorly written text message, you felt an arm snake around your waist. Your eyes snapped up and a series of unsavoury words about to leave your mou-oh?
“There you are, princess,” that familiar drawl. Your turn and your eyes met a pair of familiar brown ones, your lips stretched into a smile. Not Mingyu, but this was much better.
That random individual immediately pulled back, it helped that Seungcheol had a larger build so he basically pushed the person away. You relaxed into his grip, relishing the feel of his arm around your waist. It felt like the music was drowned out in the time you looked into his eyes. 
“Sorry, she’s taken.” Seungcheol had managed to pry his eyes away from yours to give the unwanted individual a hard stare. They seemed to get the hint and muttered an apology before slinking off, probably to bother another poor unsuspecting party goer. 
You turn your body so you were facing Seungcheol, both his arms now around you and your hands rest on his hard chest. His eyes sliding back to meet yours, a confident smile decorating his face. The two of you could stand there forever if it weren’t for the loud music and rowdy party people. Someone elbowed you causing you to stumble further into this chest. 
“Woah there princess, drunk already?” He leaned towards you, “knew u were a lightweight but come on.”
The distance between the two of you not leaving any room for Jesus. You could feel the butterflies in your stomach going feral and your heart rate speeding up. His eyes pulling you in further, his smile making your knees weak. Maybe you did need to get a health checkup. 
“Y/N?” Both of you jolted out of your trance, realising the position you were in, you quickly pushed yourself away from him. His arms left your waist and all you could hear was the loud music again. 
“Y/N? Y/N!” Mingyu pushed himself through the crowd, “there you are, my god.”
Mingyu ushered the two of you towards another part of his house, the music wasn’t as loud here as it was in the previous room. There were lesser people and it was much easier to have an actual conversation here. 
“Gyu, I thought you said this was going to be a small party,” you say with your arms crossed.
Had you known that it was going to be such a big party, you would have rejected Mingyu’s invite immediately. You weren’t fond of large parties, preferring to spend your nights rolling around in bed with a good book and a nice cup of tea. When you did attend parties, you were almost always standing in a quieter part of the party scrolling through your phone and you only attended because of Mingyu’s constant pleading, he never liked it when you stayed at home for too long. 
“Yea, that’s what I thought,” he said, looking exasperated, “I told Soonyoung and next thing you know half the uni’s at my house. His fault really.”
The three of you turn to stare at Soonyoung who was currently doing a keg stand with Seokmin and Seungkwan at his sides shouting words of encouragement. You and Mingyu rolled your eyes while Seungcheol chuckled. 
Seungcheol gave you a pat on the arm before walking off to join Jeonghan and Joshua on the sofa. Watching his retreating figure, you hated to admit that you already missed his presence.
Once Seungcheol was out of earshot, Mingyu whacked you on the arm. “What’s up with the two of you?”
“Okay, ow.” You say while rubbing your arm, sometimes you wonder if he thinks everybody is as muscle-y as he is. “Nothing’s going on, he just saved me from some finance-bro.” 
Mingyu made a face, he quickly excused himself when he noticed Soonyoung getting off the keg looking like he was about to throw up in a nearby vase. Luckily Mingyu managed to catch him in time to redirect him towards an empty bucket. Seokmin and Seungkwan, who you were assuming were equally as drunk, booed at Soonyoung’s bent over figure as he slumped into the bucket. Mingyu turned to look at you with a look of pure disgust on his face. 
You grinned at him, not making any move to help. This was actually surprising, normally at this time of the night Mingyu would be the keg stand-er, everybody else would be drunk off their faces and you would probably be in Mingyu’s position right now. The only reason Mingyu was very sober, too sober he would argue, was because he had originally planned a movie night with your small friend group before it was clearly ruined by Soonyoung.
“And this is why we don’t tell Soonyoung anything in advance,” you muttered under your breath. 
Honestly you, and probably Mingyu, didn’t know 90% of the people in the house. You shuddered to think what was happening in the upstairs bedrooms. The last time Mingyu threw a party this big was on his birthday and you had stayed back to help his house staff clean. Whilst going through the rooms, you found that each and every bedroom was occupied by a couple or multiple couples doing things that you wished you had not seen. You then spent a month after that regularly attending Sunday masses, trying to rid your brain of the unsavoury images. You weren’t even religious!
You found yourself an empty spot on the sofa and decided that was where you would stay for the rest of the night. Pulling out your phone, you were just about to resume your very interesting read on dating sims and it’s effects on one’s love life when you feel a dip on the sofa and someone settled next to you. 
No doubt, it was another respectful individual trying to add you into their long list of women that they’ve hit on throughout the night. Maybe you’d be in this person’s top 10 if you were lucky. Once you’ve finally motivated yourself enough to greet the person, you planted a tight smile on your face and lifted your head. You were surprised to come face to face with your knight in shining armour. 
“Don’t look at me like that, princess, you forgot to thank me for saving you back there.” He tilted his head in the direction of the room you just came from, his arm resting on the back of the couch behind you.  
“I had it under control, my good sir,” your smile becoming more genuine, happy that you were finally in a softer environment where you could truly appreciate his voice.
“Didn’t look like it, milady,” he quipped with a playful gleam in his eyes, leaning closer to you. “You looked like you were 5 seconds away from investing in some poorly constructed pyramid scheme.”
“Was that what he was talking about? Honestly the music was so loud, all I could really feel was his spit.” you stick your tongue out, shuddering. 
Seungcheol chuckled, that deep baritone chuckle that would have millions of girls, including you, swooning. In fact right now some girls were throwing you dirty looks.
“Why are you here anyway? You were pretty quick to abandon me for Hannie and Josh.” 
“Aw come on princess, didn’t want your bodyguard over there t’have any reason to punch me.” Seungcheol gestured to Mingyu who patting Soonyoung on the back while Seungkwan and Seokmin danced around them. You were about to tease Seungcheol further when you felt a shadow loom over the two of you. 
“Cheollie baby, you promised me a dance!” You swore it was the highest, whiniest, squeakiest voice you had ever heard come out of a person. Some girls you didn’t recognise had surrounded Seungcheol and were currently giving him fuck-me eyes and pulling on his free arm. They purposefully pushed between the two of you, blocking your view of him. 
It was amusing how panicked Seungcheol looked. He eyed you, silently begging for help as the tugs got stronger and more violent each time. Some girls had, for the lack of a better word, started molesting his arms and chest. 
“Don’t let me keep you, Cheollie baby~” You say with a pitchier tone and the brightest smile you can manage. You give him a slow wave as you watch him be yanked off the couch by the giggling banshees.
Turning your attention back to your phone, you hear one of them say, “Why do you hang out with her Cheollie? She has a job? She’s like poor!” 
You weren’t sure if Seungcheol heard it. He probably wouldn’t care anyway. 
Now, back to datings sims and your love life.  
A/N 2: I always welcome constructive criticism. Send me something if you think I need to improve somewhere
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gerdy-sertorius · 2 days
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The Definitive Damsel Analysis (if I do say so myself)
(Disclaimer: I know it’s absurdly long, and for that I apologize. I apparently am more unwilling to make cuts than I am to present subpar work. I’m working on it. Only editing I do for my autistic ramblings is copyediting, baby! Whoo! I will be updating this for the Pristine Cut once it comes out and we get even *more* Damsel. Obviously, as I’m sure you can tell from the length, I really like Damsel. There will be all of the bias. It will be great.)
(Author’s Note: For the love of the most high God, it took me like twenty read throughs for me to standardize what I wanted to call the Scorched Grey. Here is a brief list of all the terms I used to refer to her: Scorched Grey, Burned Grey, Burning Grey, Fire Grey, Damsel Chapter 3. Sometimes but not always preceded by “the” or “The”.)
Alright, ladies and gentlemen. I have oft made the statement on here that Damsel is the best route in the game, and this began as me trying to definitively prove that, by microscopically going through the route, I could establish exactly why, it would seem, that Damsel has objective superiority. It sorta… evolved, though, so instead I will be going relatively chronologically throughout, and trying to point out a couple things that all of you know about and maybe a couple things you don’t about the best character in the game. With that preamble out of the way, let’s begin with the goofy stuff, the grab bag if you will. 
This will certainly be more personal taste than anything else, but I do think there’s a lot of miscellaneous stuff that Damsel does better than the other chapters. For example, I am convinced that it has the third best music, behind Tower and her routes and then Thorn. I am genuinely obsessed with “It Was Always That Easy”. The basement has some *fantastic* art, and I think that really carries a chapter that is otherwise generally bland when it comes to actual visual activity. It’s really carried by its genuinely perfect dialogue. 
Overall, and most importantly, this chapter is the undisputed master of the idea of positive ambience. You know elevator music? How it’s there to artificially increase the cheeriness of an otherwise dreary moment, like a hotel hallway or, yanno, an elevator? Well, this is the chapter that does it perfectly. Everything is designed to make it “nicer” than it actually is. The Narrator even takes that into account when describing the basement. The sound design is fresh and relaxing, the music is uplifting, the Princess’s voice is obviously fantastically done, but also the Voice of the Smitten plays a large role in making it feel “good”. It’s something that exists in order to communicate exactly the feelings it wants the player to feel, which is all warm and fuzzy inside. But let’s move on to the actual content, shall we?
Damsel has *the* best Chapter One and it isn’t even close. Certainly not in the horror department, where I think Beast and Nightmare shine, or even in the whole characterization bit, where the award can only go to Spectre and the masterclass that is her Chapter One. But Damsel has something else to it. Damsel has tragedy, almost Shakespearean in nature. Nobody else has it (except Witch, to some extent, but nowhere close to the same level), nobody manages to reach that connection, there and then broken, to honestly feel for both Princess and Slayer. Allow me to paint a picture of a playthrough. 
You are on a path in the woods. At the end of that path is a cabin. In the basement of that cabin is a princess. You are here to slay her. But you don’t do that. That voice itching in the back of your skull, the one you quite literally call Hero, your moral compass even, raises some objections. You don’t want to kill *anybody*. That isn’t something you want to mark yourself with, especially not solely on the word of an individual you just met. For now, violence is a nonstarter.
You enter the cabin. And you hear her voice. And you see her. You even talk with her for a while. The moment is… hypnotizing. Despite the Narrator’s warning of manipulation, well, you cannot help but be manipulated. This is a genuinely nice, sweet, scared Princess who simply wants to be free. You have to save her. It is the right thing to do, it is the… only thing to do. Anything else marks you with the dirtiness of simply being unwilling to help someone in need when you had the full ability to. 
You go to get a key. Unsuccessful. The door locks. Even worse. The Narrator is moving from irritating to downright malicious, clearly enjoying recounting the lock of the door. Disgust for Him has been present since you entered the cabin, but it shifts to anger very quickly. That shift continues with full force as you attempt with what little ability you have to save the Princess, even if you don’t quite know how you will get out. The question does not last long. For the shift to anger shifts once more, to a sort of incomprehensible fury.
For the Narrator has crossed a line. Not only has he taken away any semblance of choice, not only has he raised your own knife against an innocent, someone who has been nothing but kind to you, but you are the one who must bear the shame for it. You are the only one who is doing the foul deed in any eyes but your own. Speaking of, the Princess’s eyes are filled with genuine happiness at the moment, as you are finally giving her the freedom she has yearned for such a  long time. Yet through no fault of your own, you raise the pristine blade, the one you refused to bring down to the basement in the first place. You scramble through the list of options, attempting to find anything that could provide a sliver of hope in the situation, anything without the grim finality of “Slay the Princess”. 
At last, you find one, and are able to bark out a warning to the Princess. That happiness in her eyes is shifted to a look of fear, one directed at you alone, one condemning you with such a sorrowful betrayal that it almost hurts to see. She begs for you to stop, and then she says something that almost calms the internal storm of the player: “Please, I know this isn’t you.” She recognizes that it isn’t us that betrayed her, she understands that we aren’t trying to do this, that we are flat-out trying to stop it. But the eye of that storm is passing, and soon.
And as she takes the blade, as she prepares to do what she must to live, that same look of tragic betrayal crosses her eyes, this time not directed at us, but at herself. She hates that this is her only option, the only way that she can live is to kill another, one with every intention of freeing her and no intention of harming her. And in the end, she simultaneously underscores the tragedy of the moment while confirming our perception that she could never be a threat to the world. As she plunges the blade into our chest, she has failed to even do the bare minimum of making our death painless, something that fills her with even more guilt, tears streaming down her cheeks as she tries and fails to end our own agony. The last thing we see of her are her endless cascade of both tears and apologies, as everything goes dark. 
This… is beautiful. A glorious tragedy, one with limited theming, simply two characters with emotions that feel natural. And, quite strangely, the first chapter has almost nothing to do with the second chapter. But it is still important. I’ll get to that later. Better things await now! For with the end of the tale of the Hero and the Princess, we have a new individual, everyone’s favorite buddy, the Voice of the Smitten. 
I am certain I do not need to underscore just how popular Smitten is. Easily the most fan favorite of the fan favorites, especially solidifying his place within that roster with the Kiss from a Thorn. He is jovial, passionate, he is Don Quixote, complete with the unlimited self-delusion that comes with the territory. There’s a reason people love him. Romantic in a game entitled a love story, the largest of personalities in a game stuffed with them, he is the storybook hero come to life in a game that has just as much reverence for storybook heroes as the deconstructions of them. In short, he is the visage of likability itself, with all the bombast that comes with that. Yet that is only from a wholly external perspective. 
For what I am certain I do need to underscore is just how sinister Smitten is. For all of his likability, the Smitten is also probably the single slimiest voice out of all of them with the possible exception of the Opportunist. This is not a new revelation – people have understood that since the beginning with his frankly disturbing behavior regarding the Princess. What is perhaps more interesting is his relationship with the player. For he is one of the two options that reflect the player at this point within the story. Either the player is trying to do the right thing and free an innocent, or they have somewhat… different motivations. 
The former reflects the Hero. Somewhat naive, in many routes somewhat bumbling even, but first and foremost focused on the external. That is, “how can I make a positive impact on the world around me?” As contradictory as it may seem to how the Hero is presented, it’s something of an intellectualist approach. The Hero is trying to find the best possible world and working towards that with all of his might. It is, one could say, devoid of emotion except that determination to change the world, to make it a better place. While the goal remains the same, the path to get there is fundamentally continuously being calculated. The Hero is your conscience, and as such he must *always* work overtime for that. 
The Smitten is not that. No, he has made no secret that he is the path of passion. Even when he is generally considered to be a better person, he declares that, “Whatever world would condemn two star-crossed lovers to a cycle of violence and despair isn’t a world worth saving.” His focus is internal, it is on ourself and our romance. There is no extensive study into what is the correct option, there is only what would assist in our relationship, which is somehow ordained by the universe. To put it into understandable terms, Hero is a modern hero while Smitten is a Romantic-era hero. 
There’s an important line when going down the stairs that I think speaks volumes about the type of player and playthrough currently occurring. That is “We can still do right by her without all this over-the-top fawning.” *That* is the line of demarcation between the route of the Hero and the route of the Smitten. If you decide to embrace or repudiate the Smitten at that point, I think the route is sealed. I am convinced that the game will continue on in a fixed way based on that philosophy. The point where you must, internally that is, decide if you are doing this out of a desire for what is right, or an infatuation with the Princess. 
Now, of course there isn’t anything wrong with taking the path of the Smitten, and it’s personally one of my top points in the game, but whether you admit it or not, you are long past morality being what decides your actions. That has come and gone. Now, the goal is to express the passion of the moment and delve into your romantic relationship with the Princess. I’ll be evaluating each of the routes differently, loosely organized with a focus on how it reacts to the player. After that, I’ll go on into theming of each route one by one and all that jazz.
The path of the Smitten first. The player embraces that he has been sent to save the Princess from her unjust and foul imprisonment above all else. So that is what he does. He marches downstairs, the blade being nothing but a passing afterthought as it is immediately dismissed out of hand. When it comes to the crucial point of “doing right by her”, the justification is made that two things can be done at once, that you can do this for her and do a little bit of fawning on the way. Doesn’t harm anyone.
And with that the basement arrives, and you see the Princess on the floor. She is perfect in all ways. There is nothing wrong with her. And that’s before you start talking to her. When you do begin talking to her, all of the kindness and innocence from Chapter 1 are magnified to the greatest degree possible. She can do no wrong. And, from a meta standpoint, there’s another thing that stands out – it is really, *really* funny. From everything the Smitten says to the “Then I didn’t end the world!” to the Narrator’s (a villain at this point) growing exasperation at your trust for the Princess, it endears you to the moment even more. 
Because it’s not only that it’s funny. It’s not only that the Princess is genuinely nice to you. It’s something more than that. Something that I am loath to talk about but will anyway. The Princess is incredibly – *sigh* – **cute** within this chapter. This is objective, with science to back me up, I’m sure. But she is specifically designed to be as heartwarming as possible, and every line makes her more and more into someone who should be saved by you, into, well, a Damsel. While it isn’t explicitly stated, throughout the progression of dialogue, the need to protect her becomes more pronounced. You were already primed to like the Princess, you already internally committed to a romantic future. But after stepping into the bear trap willingly, you cannot escape. 
And if you’re anything like me, you are perfectly fine with that. So you take in the moment, you rescue her from her chains and laugh at the way her hands slipped out of the chains and the Narrator’s comical anger at it. It’s all very feel-good, all cleanly written dialogue, and both the Princess and the Smitten are likable, they’re fun, and the Narrator is a fun enough villain for the Smitten and you to unite against. The Hero, if we’re being honest, barely registers, and if he does it’s usually as an extension to the Narrator, as a foil to yourself. And with her finally free, she embraces you, sealing the deal on her perfection. 
And after that, something else happens. The deconstruction begins. You want to see if her dialogue has any more of that saccharine present throughout the rest of the chapter, and are immediately rewarded with the “The princess closes her eyes in deep reflection” and the follow up joke. Hungry for more, you click through some more of the dialogue, but something begins to happen. She begins to… unwind. The Smitten seems to reciprocate in turn, to a lesser extent. In fact, she really starts to return to the horror that this chapter was a nice respite from. So you cut your losses, decide to leave with her, and everything returns to normal. Bathed in the glow of your future, you immediately forget about the deconstruction.
After that, you finally get out of the basement, get a genuinely great moment opening the door alongside the Princess, never think twice about clicking “You’re not doing that.” as fast as humanly possible, and finally await the door at the end of the cabin. You finally get your fairytale ending. The princess goes out into the world together with you. You brought her out. And then she is taken by the Shifting Mound in a way reminiscent of her dying. Even if this wasn’t your first playthrough, it still comes as a shock. For the most part, you were being that Romantic hero, living in the moment with your passion. The thought of this happening was gone entirely. This wasn’t supposed to happen. And it *hurts*. And the chapter is over. 
The route of the Hero has a different point of view on the whole situation. That’s not to say it’s not easy to get drawn in by the hilarious dialogue and sheer cuteness of the Princess – far from it. It is, after all, what drives the conflict within this. For the Hero, and the player that goes along his path, has one bit of information stand out. That the world ended after the Princess killed you. Now, you can naturally be skeptical of the information, but the Princess isn’t helping her case here. Entirely vague, entirely unwilling to mention anything about it. The only thing she seems to care about is getting on your good side. 
Now, you still want to save her. That much is clear. You still don’t take the knife in the beginning, and you saw her Chapter 1 incarnation. She is still a good person, kind and loving. But there are questions raised, important questions. Which is why not all Hero routers get the same ending. There is a conflict between how far you’re able to go before the risk of the world ending eclipses your distrust of the Narrator and your trust of the Princess. If the whole world really does end if she’s free, is it worth it? And as such you get to the major points of the Hero ending. 
The first is the Deconstructed ending. As you question the Princess, you desperately try to figure out what the best way to go forward is for you. And that starts with getting a straight answer from the Princess on what exactly she plans on doing. The operation… does not go well. As you try and push for anything, any sign that she isn’t going to end the world, the same rejoinder comes in, alongside a distorted track. “I just want to make you happy.” The Princess is not an individual anymore, and begins to change shape. But you are locked in with a horrified inability to look away, like one who sees a car accident. And with that, the Princess is a Princess no longer, and the Shifting Mound takes her away. 
There’s also the option of taking the Hero’s advice when confronted with the scenario: to leave. You don’t like what’s going on and you try to do whatever you can to undo the doing. Perhaps surprisingly, it works. And then you’re forced to deal with the cognitive dissonance of the Princess and *that* being the same individual. But you, not without a healthy dose of skepticism, still head upstairs alongside the Princess. In the end, you can’t bring yourself to kill her. Throughout it all, she still has been the beautifully endearing picture of innocence, if a questionable one, and especially with regards to the knife on the table, there is no way you can take it to her chest with no warning, especially after everything you did in the first Chapter. So you leave with her, and the “end of the world” really does come in one fell swoop with the call of the Shifting Mound. You can’t help but wonder if the decision you made was the right one, not really. Like, you still believe she didn’t deserve to die, but maybe, just maybe, it would have been a better ending.
So what if you did kill her? What happens when love *truly* melts away into skepticism. After the continuous question dodging and whatever the… other thing was, this is clearly not an ordinary Princess, it is not the same Princess that you tried to save at the beginning. There is only a sliver of her, a shadow of her former self. Slaying her, well, slaying her is probably doing her a favor. It might be doing the world a favor, too. Maybe she is an individual with malicious intent. And as you take the blade and plunge it into her chest, you instantly know you made the wrong decision. She does not oppose it. She simply lets you kill her with a single tear hanging in her eye, saying “I think this is what you want.” It’s meant to feel dirty and it does, even heartbreaking in the moment, although it is immediately counterbalanced by the effect of the Smitten killing you over it.
I won’t exactly go over Scorched Grey the same way, I think there’s generally only two frames of mind going into it, and that’s either the standard “Hero-Skeptic” framework that I’ll expand on later, or simply a completionist mindset. Plus, it’s technically not The Damsel. Plus I’m lazy. But this is the point where I will try to expand on the theming of each and every route and mindset to go through within the Chapter, and that *will* include the Scorched Grey theming. 
It’s made quite clear from the chapter that one of the primary themes is objectification, the making of the Princess into nothing more than a vehicle to live one’s fantasy into. The taking of an individual and making them into an it. The destruction of humanity by your own desire, and what that says about your desires in the first place. Ironically, this is merely one fourth wall away from the rest of the Princesses, each of them being a piece of fiction that many simply engage with *because* they are an object, but with the Damsel it is directly nodded to within the narrative. One meta-layer is peeled back, if you will. 
Nothing hammers this more home than the entirely jarring line that escapes the Shifting Mound’s lips when you ask about the vessel she holds. Unlike the rest of the fragments, which are all given an indication that they have been fulfilled after the Shifting Mound takes them, the only note she has to say is that the Damsel has “served her purpose”. There is nothing that she wished for, as anyone who has obtained the deconstructed ending can attest to. But even in the more standard runs, she is simply a tool to be used and discarded. And there are three general reactions to this line. 
The first is the hardcore Smitten route’s preferred choice, denial. “The Princess was far more than an object, she had character, she had kindness, she had motivations from the beginning! The narrative is what is wrong, there’s nothing wrong with the Princess. She. Is. Perfect. Not just from a narrative standpoint but a metanarrative one as well. She has depth, she *is* a character.” All in the hopes that if they insist on it enough, it will become true. The Damsel was not designed to be viewed in a vacuum. There are themes that run through her character, and including negative ones, and the denial of them is a far truer denial of the character than any sort of objectification could ever be. 
Then the more moderate Smitten routers get a different response. A slap in the face. They did all of this, they had fun, they laughed with her, they cried when she was taken. They were connected to her, they had a real connection to what she was. One could even accuse them of… loving her. They honest to goodness cared about this Princess, they were invested in her story. Yet, in the end, they also formed her around themselves. They “molded her to love you”. As much as they loved the Princess, that was only because they cut out a piece of the Shifting Mound that they *could* love, a caricature of her true nature. They still took an individual, and despite truly loving her, made her into something that she was not so they could do that very thing. She is not a person. She is a plot device, an individual made to love and be loved with nothing beyond that. She is an object. 
Lastly, those who went on the route of the Hero get that same slap in the face, that selfsame bucket of water poured over their heads, but in a different way. They didn’t try to objectify her. They didn’t want anything of the sort. All they wanted to do was the right thing. Right? Yet even in that desire to do the right thing, they still get that same chilling text from the Shifting Mound. They have built an individual just like those who went on the route of the Smitten. Just a different one. Not one who was built around your “glorious romance”, but rather one built around something of a glorious Romance. The need to be a Hero. The desire to do what was right, to save an unjustly imprisoned Princess. The Princess became a plot device in the end anyway, just one that needed to be saved rather than one who needed to be loved. 
I want to continue off of that. The player is trying to do nothing more than the right thing, he is simply doing what a Hero should. And that determination to do what is right leads to him getting impacted the most by that line in the ending, the line that implies that whatever right he was doing, he was still being driven by selfishness, by that need to be a Hero. That hits the player right within where it hurts, it almost could be said to strike at the one emotional vulnerability of them. To have your hard work, your pain, your desire for what is right to be considered nothing more than the delusions of a Don Quixote tilting at windmills in order to fight giants, just as lost as Smitten, that doesn’t feel too great. It almost minimizes your struggle, and it is genius. You play as a Hero because you want to feel like a Hero, not because the morality of this world means anything to you. It is stripping that meta-layer down one by one.
But objectification is not the only theme present. While it may seem like something of a potpourri topic to throw in, earlier on the server we were talking about the Damsel in particular’s perceptiveness with regards to perception. When the door shuts and locks, it is the first and only time the Princess gets visibly **negative** in any way during the entirety of the Chapter. Even when you kill her, she still does so with nary a frown on her face. Even as a tear rolls down her cheek, she still smiles. But not at the door. The narration points out quite clearly that she frowns. This is, I reiterate, the only thing that happens. And her response is not “we’re stuck down here”, it is not “I’m unable to leave now”. 
What it is happens to be “that’s not supposed to happen”. She recognizes the construct in a way very few allude to within the game. Adding onto that note, within the Scorched Grey chapter, she (correctly) determines the very nature of the construct and that inherent “cycle of violence and despair” inherent to it, even (correctly) determining that the only way to leave was to annihilate that very construct. This is shown even clearer at the other major event at the door. When you ask if the Princess can open the door, the sole question she throws back at you is “Do you think I can?”, and after a response in the affirmative, “Then I can”. In the end, it is quite clear that she is, *heavily* ironically, one of the more aware characters in the game with regards to your circumstance. 
While speaking of the Scorched Grey, I think this route also exemplifies another major theme – the nature of the Princess as a being of perception. All routes exemplify one facet of the Shifting Mound: Spectre represents the gravity of her, Tower her divinity, Prisoner the very incarnation in and of itself of her within the construct, and so on. Damsel has something different, though, and that is that she’s just a slippery little fella. Far more than anybody else, Damsel changes throughout her chapters, in ways more pronounced than anybody else. The Shifting Mound declares that we “molded her to love you”, as I quoted previously. That molding takes stage front and center throughout all of our interactions with her. 
The most obvious example is her deconstruction, which when her sole true motivation (to leave) is discarded, she begins to break down, unable to offer to the player anything beyond the only desire every other Princess has. With the compulsive need to love the player, etched into her core, there is nothing she can do other than try to add to that love, losing herself within the process. But that is not the only time she changes. Because she is willing to give up that freedom in, well, a heartbeat. Attempting to kill her does not lead to any sort of resistance from her. The one goal she had, staying alive and winning her freedom, is out the window despite being (questionably) willing to kill for it in the last chapter. Now, throughout the Scorched Grey, it’s made clear that she did not, in fact, want to die, that she just wanted to be free together, but the complete unwillingness to save her own life is a stark contrast to the first chapter. 
In fact, that perpetually changing nature alongside her being so objectified means that it’s really, *really* hard to figure out her true character. There is very little in her that does not change and very little remaining that isn’t specifically put there by you. She is an eel, wriggling out of your grasp and impossible to pin down, in a large way like the Shifting Mound herself. But… for the most part, there are two facets to her character beyond the already listed themes. And a sharp divide between them. 
Chapter One Damsel and Chapter Two Damsel are not the same person. That’s usually true for most of them, but they also usually have some semblance of similarity between their counterparts. The only exceptions I can think off the top of my head are Spectre and *maaybe* Stranger if you want to count that. The rest of them act as exaggerated versions of the existing individuals shown. Chapter One Adversary likes fights. Chapter Two Adversary likes fights. Chapter One Witch is built on the back of distrust. Chapter Two Witch is built on the back of distrust. Everything lines up nicely. 
That is not the case for the Damsel. The only thing that you can say with both of them is that they are nice and do not want to hurt you. The Chapter One incarnation (henceforth Princess) is a tragedy of a character that doesn’t want to kill you but still must to secure her own life and freedom against a renegade puppeting you. The Chapter Two incarnation (henceforth Damsel) is a Horror-”Feel-Good”-Comedic-Tragic character that shows nothing about the emotional anguish she went through in chapter one. I love both of them, but they have an unmatched disconnect. And I think that sort of adds to the character. Now, there is absolutely a benefit from an emotional through-line (there’s a reason Thorn is my second-favorite chapter), but in this case, only brief touches to the beginning enhance the story. 
The most striking thing is the sense of comedic horror that comes when Damsel just completely ignores any expected trauma from the Princess’s emotional destruction. It, depending on the route you take, either makes you love her character more and more as the humor begins to entrap you, or it begins the process of getting the player unnerved, exactly like the developers wanted. It is a key dividing point in the mindset of the player and the route that they have chosen. The Damsel says nothing about what happened, heck, she barely acknowledges it except to indicate that “You died!” 
Secondly, it sets up Damsel as a sympathetic figure while still allowing her to begin establishing herself. Without the setup from the Princess, the player has no idea how to view Damsel, potentially even seeing her as a less on-the-nose Razor, with her comedically hiding her sinister intentions. The Princess allows the player to begin on a note that the Princess is *actually* friendly rather than simply pretending to be so. At the same time, it’s divorced enough that apart from that frame of reference at the beginning, Damsel is still allowed to shine within her own character. 
Lastly, and most importantly, it sets her up for the Scorched Grey. The guilt at causing the death of an innocent and the belief that you would be unable to cause the death of an innocent yourself leads her to blame the construct and attempt to bring it down, which seals your fate in the third Damsel chapter, the only time where the two chapters meet in a beautiful climax of Passion going too far and causing pain, in attempt of running away from that very thing, morphing into something that not even the Smitten is able to remain devoted to in an awful tragedy of love being not enough in the end. 
Wait, wait, wait. Did I hear “the end” being spoken? At this time of year? Localized entirely within this essay? Well then, it’s time to talk about what puts this saga at pure perfection, shall we? I probably could just use the awesome power of Ctrl + V to get the desired effect, but I still do want to offer my narration, so I’ll compromise and do a bit of both. “Your lover drives a stake into your body. And another. And another. And another. And another. Do I miss your heart because I cannot stand to see it go? But the stakes meant nothing to you. You had a desire, and you set that desire free, you lifting me and me lifting you, forever and ever and ever, consumed by true belief, there was nothing that could hold us back.” 
Do I even need to explain why that’s so good? Definitively the best poem in the end, it isn’t even close, especially when coupled with Ms. Goodnight’s awe-inspiring delivery. Did I say that the Scorched Grey was the perfect synthesis of the Princess and the Damsel? I was lying. This is. Every word so lovingly placed, the language sounds like it comes from the pen of God Himself. It is emotionally resonant, the art is beautiful, I have not run into such a short piece of dialogue that outdoes it. Gonna be honest, mostly just wrote up this essay to gush about it. Even now, it is considered by most everyone to be one of the best lines of dialogue in a game filled with magnificent ones. 
And the other one, that of the Scorched Grey. It’s simpler, ironically. “I kill you. You kill me. Back and forth we go, faster and faster and faster. I kill you. You kill me. Hollow eyes watch from the dry corners of a memory. A home built on all of the futures that were supposed to be, preserved until the moment of reunion. The fire of the heart sets it all ablaze. I kill you and me.”
This, this right here is one of the most slept on ending poems and it’s not even funny. So fantastic at expressing the heartbreak inherent to the Scorched Grey’s character. I don’t know how you can see the line “A home built on all the futures that were supposed to be”, especially with the Scorched Grey dead and charring in a wedding gown, and not feel *something*. It’s not as good as the standard Damsel stuff, but then again, nothing is. It’s still deserving of more praise than it currently receives, and one of my top three ending poems of all time, only edged out by Prisoner. Gosh, this game belongs in a museum. 
Seems I need to debunk some stuff that happens to get a lot of traction regarding those who speculate on Damsel, too. First of all, her character motivation is not guilt nor gratitude. That sort of thing works incredibly well in fanworks, and I’m happy to see it ~~because that means I get to see Damsel in a fanwork~~. It has little to no backing within canon. Damsel is a chapter about the only motivations for the Princess being those put in place by the objectification of the player. There is nothing regarding anything beyond that, and it detracts from the existing, well-elucidated themes that are actually within the chapter. The only sort of substance to them is both Chapter 1 Princess and Scorched Grey indicating guilt for killing you, but that is almost entirely repudiated within the actual Chapter 2. 
Speaking of the Scorched Grey, another thing I saw somewhat extensively is that you somehow “taught her” that killing is the way to love one another, and that’s why she kills you in Chapter 3, and I honestly do not know how that gained any traction at all. It’s pretty clear that she views all the death as a pretty terrible and messed up thing and only kills the two of you to escape the cycle of death. It’s spoken of as a means to an end, not an end in and of itself. I am genuinely confused on how this got started, because it really just… opposes the main *in-narrative* themes of the Chapter??? Like, you don’t even have to analyze it, it’s just within the text, plain and simple. 
Anyway, I deeply apologize for the length of this once again, look forward to an appendix when Pristine Cut comes out. I’ve already played it because my uncle works at Black Tabby, but I don’t want to spoil it for you gents. If my opinions change massively after playing through the new update from today, I will change that too. Anyway, Damsel is the best character, literally does not do a single thing wrong within any of her chapters, has definitively the best Shifty stuff, and you should invest in her. As more people vocally become willing to throw money at anything related to Damsel, the likelier it is that we get Damsel merch. I need it so badly. Please. Anyway, if anything stands out to you or you disagree, I am begging you to tell me to get my act together and explain what I said wrong, so do that. Also please. 
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azuresins · 1 year
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The Phantomhive Ring Nonofficial merchandise, fanmade, custom. ·3D modeled in SolidWorks by @noirserviteur ·3D printed using resin, then cast in sterling silver ·Fitted with blue sapphire (+ diamond chips, soon)
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I haven't even watched the movie yet
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peridots-pixiwolf · 8 months
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sketches from @mipexch 's whiteboard a couple days ago!!
also feat. a very small reference to @onlineviolence :]
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yukipri · 7 months
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I feel like over the month+, I have like 1-2 hours a day max where I feel relatively awake, and every other hour I'm fighting bone-deep exhaustion. I'll bring it up with my doc at my check up on monday, but tbh i know the solution so idk if she can help
And I can work-work when I feel half-dead, or rather I force myself to because I don't want my cats to starve, but when it comes to creative stuff, it's like my mind is slippery sludge dribbling out my eyes...
The Solution, of course: just stop working 3~10 AM every day (and then taking a short nap, working during the day, and then taking another short nap, hours vary but repeat), and maybe get at least 6, ideally 8 uninterrupted hours of sleep at least every other day, ideally every day.
But do I see that happening? No.
Like rn I know I desperately need to edit fic and reply to comments and do several arts but I'm nodding off at my desk after boss DMing me work at 5 AM and dealing with repair people since 8:30 AM...
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........creachure
#cats#his eyes are always so big and weird he no longer looks like a cat anymore sometimes.. in a way...#it's hard to understand.. complicated vibes on this boy#his summer sprawl (laying flopped out on the floor weird because of the heat)#I AM still trying to get some costumes done and also post another poll advtnure so I can finally finish it lol#the weather this month has just been soooo.... There was the heat wave and then after like 2 days of coolenss where I was like 'ah! finally#I can be productiv!' but just as soon as I had recovered from the heat.. it got hot again ghhhh#currently sweating inside. I actually had to leave my doctors appointment early today because I was just so so warm from#sitting in the car and the fac tthat half the buildings still do not have their air up very high and etc. and I felt so nausous#and flushed and started to get back and stomach pains for some reason.. Which I guess is good in a way to further confirm to doctors that#I Have Something Wrong With Me lol (most normal people should not be this heat sensitive I think) but is also still a little stinky#because I still payed a copay for the fulla appointment time but cit it short by leaving 15minues early.. grrr#ANYWAY. It seems like recently it's just hot all the time but it will ocasionally tempt you with a cool day of reprieve BUT don't let your#guard down! because as soon as you start to think 'hey things are getting better! :0' the sun will be like NO actualy. scalding temperature#be upon ye..#Which of COURSE. I would rather have hot weather with little breaks in between than just constant hot weather. 100% definitely.#but it just always makes me sad because I get my hopes up lol.. JUST as I've recovered from the past heat and am So Ready To Start#On All My Things now That I'm Not As Sick And Hey Maybe It's Even Cool Enough To Do A Costume! .. my hopes are dashed#.. woe and so on and so forth. . Which I am stil managing to get a few things done but just.. not the things I really WANT to do (costumes.#sculptures. edit videos. etc. ).#anyway.. look at son.. If nothing else I still have lots of cat photos.. my sole productivity offerings to the internet online world
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slugandthorn · 2 months
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Annoyed in a very normal way that his portrait from school is the same length as his hair during the game. Don't worry about what's in the tags I'm sure it's a normal amount of text.
#.txt#BEFORE I SAY ANYTHING ELSE. The long hair is clearly better. i am happy to have the original image over my stupid phone edit.#im fact checking something kn the wiki and apparebtly in the manga he has a turtle neck instead of a dress shirt. gagging#i feel insane for this i cant find an answer. when he killed kens mom he was a freshman it was two years before the beginning if the game.#like. MAYBE he finishes that year. he didnt attend a second year right???#so assuming he actually gets to live. and he goes back to school. hed have to restart there. and at the point junpei and the bunch would#be his upperclassmen and THERES NO WAY he would be able to deal with that. hes getting his japanese equivalent GED.#that was actually a side tangent because. well. anyway.#the MAIN point of the post: how only knowing characters from fiction AFTER a life changing event that has probably caused#a major personality shift and seeing that in his character design.#i feel like this applies. to a lot of my guys. but i feel like its also exacerbated in this case because akihiko and mitsuru knew him before#and we have no idea who that person was HES NOT IN THE FUCKING FLASH BACK AUURGHH. MAKE THE SPRITE.#this is sickening for shinji. given how sweet he is. whilst slowly killing himself. theyre so funny for that.#also design nitpicking. the pale skin obviously. also a controversial thing. i do like him having darker hair in p3d.#even if it was probably done to distinguish him from akechi. light brown hair doesnt suit him as well. imo. the only guy who thinks about it#p3d bias because they gave us the canonical beach outfit we never got and i just want him to have more outfits so bad.#im sorry im not a peacoat fan. ill allow the heels.#CAN I SAY HOW MAD I AM HIS FUNERAL PICTURE IS HIS FUCKING SPRITE. AND NOT LIKE AN ACTUAL SCHOOL PICTURE. JUST GIVE. AN ARTIST A DAY TO EDIT#im watching the funeral now <3 mistake.#insane the school held a funeral for a student who hadnt attended in almost two years.#top ten junpei moments though.#WHY ARE THEY AT SCHOOL THERES NO WAY THEY SLEPT.#mitsuru misses her fucking FRIENDD 😭#i wont be addressing All That Shit the akihiko goes through. know it also makes me 🛀#alright. repressed emotions expressed. back to doing stuff.
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modernghostfare · 1 year
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Did you do a maceghost post yet with like headcanons or your general vision of it? even if you did... Tell us (more) about maceghost 🤲
i have these two asks from an ask game! first + second. but i can fr talk more.. i gave a rough timeline of how i picture their relationship on a post but i cant find that rn :(c basically theyve just been together but not really together for a long time. like i hc ghost to be trans and mace was there when he first started going on t in his late 20s and before the robas stuff. imo theyre like extremely close basically married but not officially together and not always talking bc theyre just. Like that. ghost doesnt like commitment and mace doesnt push it PLUS he is like, really arrogant, and just sees himself as the best ghost can do. which. lbr... could anyone do better than mace? i dont think so.
i just love the ship to me its the ultimate ghost ship like i think mace is someone who can really, really get to the core of ghost and deeply understand him. mace is not like a perfect person he has flaws but hes very honest about them and because of that ghost's filter is so like Gone with him like he will just straight up say whats on his mind. but like even when he cant get a read on Himself and he acts out of pocket mace can (now) take a step back and like. help him work through it because he knows introspection is hard for ghost bc of ghosts deep anger issues. theyre just FUN theyre literally just the most comfortable couple despite having like really huge disagreements.
like ghost thrives in an enviroment where he can be a cunt and mace can provide that without it actually being like... An Issue of how he handles people bc mace can be a cunt back if need be. idk. i wouldnt call it healthy in the purest sense but its healthy For Ghost and mace enjoys it bc he likes rude bitches. and theyve known each other forEVER.
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mattodore · 9 months
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hello... both of mattodore's questionnaires are finally finished after twelve grueling days..........
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i apparently do in fact have favorite fic actually and now every time i write i am acutely aware of this and have to mourn not being able to live up to my own standards
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sysig · 4 months
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I'm almost finished with this notebook with it's horrible paper, and I just finished the first page of my Big Project
#Oh yeah - it's all coming together#Hgggg I am so sick of this notebook! It's wack as fuck!#It has made editing a Chore for the past eight months >:0 Not fun or meditative At All#Even worse is that the paper feels good to draw on but the cleanup is just! Awful!#I've just been completely ignoring my non-lined homemade notebook because it feels bad to draw on lol#The rest of the doodles for this year - yes that's how far the queue is backlogged rn lol - are still on that paper#But at least I'm like ><this close to being done with it ugh#I've got two blank pages and then like three half-doodled on pages that I'm planning to just knock out#It looks so weird 'cause the pages are all out of order lol - the first page was in March and the last in November#But like the next page after the first is /also/ November lol#Like it's largely in chronological order but it jumps around quite a lot! It was an interesting experiment#I also think it's funny since the first page got some fandom stuff that didn't come back around until now but it Looks chronological lol#I think I'll do it again but with some modifications - if I run out of steam/interest/motivation then I can fill it in however I want#Keeping it on-theme is fun but I find myself pushing ideas when I don't actually have any :P That's no good#It's not Always bad - I like quite a few of my spacefiller ideas! But if anything that just proves that finishing things out to make room-#Well like I said it was fun lol#And! As stated! I finished the first page of my big behind-the-scenes project! >:3c#Man I haven't worked on a comic proper-like in uhhhhh#It's gotta be at least five years lol geez#It's been a weird rhythm to try to fall into lol I'm Way out of practice - but it's nice to see it come together!#Lotta steps to get it into the shape I want - hard to sustain - but slowly and surely I've got this one :)#It'll be good to finally have it Out haha
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muirneach · 2 months
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mom told me just now that i should maybe pursue art 😑 girl dont remind me that its secretly my dream to live that hashtag aesthetic artist who sells prints and can live off that full time and own a house like…. sigh idk i dont want to be defeatist like ill never know unless i try and i do plan on trying and maintaining a small art career. hashtag side hustle small business. but like unless i somehow get a gazillion sales we have to be realistic and understand its not that feasible. doesnt mean i dont want it tho….
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starswallowingsea · 2 years
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This scene grabbed me by the throat and won’t let go
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ozlices · 4 months
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watched the kdrama celebrity over the last few days. was hooked from the first few seconds bc the EDITING in the show, & just the cinematography in general is on a whole nother fuckin level, man.
also, just. a really great show in general. v good at building suspense & throwing loops & very nice themes/takeaways. also just a rly interesting way to convey those themes/takeaways.
i think the only issue we had w it was the romance, but. eh. it wasn't so bad that it took away from the ample amount of good shit in the show.
def recommend it!! especially to anyone who really enjoyed the glory bc it has v similar themes.
#mine#celebrity#celebrity kdrama#i think it's definitely a v interesting & SUPER fucking relevant for modern times exploration of jealousy in the modern age#it definitely felt v cathartic in a lot of ways for someone who has so much trauma surrounding jealousy being aimed towards me#& it resonated too as someone pursuing content creation#idk how the instagram grind is at ALL. ive literally never used instagram properly & rly have zero cares to.#but. all of the shit portrayed still resonates in any field of content creation#& i think its overall message of the dangers of modern jealousy in the digital age & esp the hatred in can create were done rly well.#i wish i could make it universally required viewing honestly. esp bc it's like. the message of not just the average person#but specifically ppl even in ur own circles can turn on u at the drop of a hat for such superficial shit these days.#ive heard a LOT of content creators sharing v similar experiences to ones portrayed in the show. esp the holier than thou attitude.#it def comes across as the creator did research or even has experience w these things themself bc damn. it's accurate.#and once again. THE EDITING IS SO FUCKING GOOD MAN#THAT OPENING SCENE I COULD WATCH FOREVER IT'S SO DAMN GOOD. AND SMOOTH. AND THE OP?!?!?!? BANGER!!!#id recommend it for the editing alone honestly#it's just a nice bonus that it's also just a genuinely rly great show that i think is important to watch#esp if u consume a lot of content creators online or are one urself.#much to think abt and analyze. reflect on. def opened our eyes a lot.
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seventh-district · 7 months
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oh my god i can’t decide what to do with my time today
#Seven.txt#writing stuff#video stuff#it’s Sunday so i need to log into Genshin and do my weeklies and i also need to grind for primos to yoink Yelan’s C1 before Tuesday#but i also need to record that so it’ll have to be done later once the house is quiet but i also need to record Lyney’s story quest but#then ​i also want to record Kaeya’s hangout but i also need to see what events are ending soon but i also need to do other non game stuff#like i need to finish going thru my backlog of likes on here and i need to answer asks and i need to work on drafted posts#and i have GOT to start working on ES Ch.4 to get that up by my self-imposed deadline soon but i’m recording that so i can only work on it#early in the mornings or late in the evenings but i also wanna finish this one-shot i’m working on for Dew and get it up on here soon#and that’s easier cause i’m not recording it but if i work on it today that’s not the best use of my time when it’s SUNDAY so it’s GENSHIN#DAY but i don’t FEEL like playing genshin rn i wanna WRITE ugh#but i’ve also got Ao3 comments awaiting a reply and i need to get a few things updated over there and i wanna work on This Is Unconditional#but i don’t have the TIME for that right now and i’ve got a bunch of messages that need replying to and a many hours of videos to edit#and i slept bad bc Nightmares so i just wanna eat and take a nap but that’s such a waste of time and uuuuugh idk man#So Many Creative Endeavors So Little Time#*collapses onto the floor in a frustrated heap*#okay. deep breath. i think. i’m gonna go work on banging out the rest of Hold On to Something bc that’s nearly fully written anyways#and i am Dying to get it out of my system bc Ghost Band fixation u know#i at least wanna get the draft done. i’ll edit/post it another day#then i’ll probably hop on genshin for a bit and do the bare minimum (i only need like 15 more pulls worth so even if i don’t grind and have#to swipe its nbd) and then i’ll hopefully be able to record the first writing session for ES ch.4 later this evening!!!#‘cause good god i wanna get that fic back into production. i miss working on it it’s just so hard to get started again#okay enough rambling. gonna go make Bullet’s lunch and get myself some lemonade. then i shall work
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