#also im pretty sure EVERY other app has the sound button on the right

[nintendochoi]

Oh cool. Tumblr changed the side of the sound button for videos. 🙃

#also the logo changed #tumblr #just gonna keep accidentally opening the video fully #also im pretty sure EVERY other app has the sound button on the right #y u gotta be complicated tumblr?

[thesunicarusfellfor]

Found (Outside the Screen) (CC!Dream x GN!Reader) Part 2

Request: That dream angst fuckin wrecked my heart..any chance for a part 2 with comfort(im not the og requester so if not thats fine its just OUGH my heart)

I have written this three times over because tumblr didn’t save it. THEN. Tumblr doesn’t show it to ANYONE unless they check my account. This happened to my Ranboo fic as well... I will honestly cry if no one sees this.

Once again. This is a completely fictitious story and version of Clay.

TW: Panic attacks, self deprecating thoughts,

"(Y/n)!"

His voice echoed through the house as you scrambled around corners to escape the possible wrath of your boyfriend. Or maybe even soon to be ex boyfriend.

Despite living in this house with him for a little over two years, it was beginning to feel like a maze. You couldn't tell which way was left and which way was right, your head spinning with panic as you gasped for breath.

He's gonna find you...

The house wasn't even that big, and quite an open concept, so you had no idea why you were finding it so confusing. All you knew at the moment was...

Get out.

Once your eyes landed on the door that lead out, you made a beeline towards it and flung it open. Maybe you should've known better than to attempt to run from the manhunt god...

The footsteps pounding against the floor not too far behind you startled you enough to jump outside and slam the door behind you in hopes of giving yourself enough time to run farther.

There were plenty of things failing to register in your mind as you ran down the empty sidewalks. Such as the poor choice (or lack) of shoes you were wearing, or even the heavy night rain pelting down on your shaking body.

Your lungs were burning.. But your brain had thrown itself so far into fight or flight mode that you had no care for anything around you, hardly blinking twice as the signs of unfamiliar street names flew past you.

Eventually, when you physically couldn't breathe any longer, you sat on a bench and took awhile to think. The consistent rain pelting down on your head was actually a decent grounder to help you snap yourself out of it... But that only caused more confusion and another wave of panic to wash over you.

Where... were you?

Doesn't matter. Don't go back.

Oh God... He hates you..

Why wouldn't he..?

He was too embarrassed to show you to his chat!

What did you do that was so embarrassing?

God.. What was so wrong with you that he stayed in his streaming room for days on end!?

Pulling your knees up to your chest, you choked back a few sobs, trying your best to keep what was left of your composure. Very quickly, however, you gave up on trying to hold yourself together and broke down, hiding your face in your knees.

Time seemed to pass by way too quickly but also way too slowly at the same time.. Like time itself was giving you the one finger salute. When you finally stopped crying, you leaned back against the back of the bench and gave a shaky sigh before you decided to attempt to think rationally again.

You had no clue where you were. Nothing looked familiar. What time is it? No clue, you don't have your... Your phone!

You quickly scrambled to your pocket to pull out the cellular device, and stared at the black screen for a few seconds. Anxiety was the reason for your hesitance as you stared into your reflection, frowning slightly. Without thinking twice, you pressed the button and the screen lit up with various arrays of colours.

78 Missed calls from Clay💚

2 Missed calls from George👓🇬🇧

7 Missed calls from Sapnap🔥

Was... He so mad that his friends were trying to yell at you too? You tilted your head slightly and scrolled through the other notifications on your lockscreen.

Twitter seemed to be losing their minds over your boyfriend's stream and wondering who the stranger was. Seeing the headlines flooded you with immeasurable guilt and you almost put your phone down again, if your phone didn't start buzzing.

You glanced down at the screen and say Clay was making call number 79... Man, he was persistent.. and he would probably continue to call until you answered...

Your finger hovered over the decline button, before slowly moving over and landing on the green one instead. "...Hello...?"

"(Y/n)...?" Had... He been crying...? "Oh my god! You're alive!" He gasped out with glee before giving a few sobs of... relief...?

"...You... Aren't... Mad?" You whispered very softly and hesitantly, your voice scratchy and sore from crying.

He sighed and there was a little bit of shuffling as well as a few male voices in the background. "No. Not in the slightest... Where are you? I want to apologize in person.. And when it doesn't sound like you're in a hurricane.."

You lifted your head up to look at the rain that was continuing to pelt down on you before looking around. "..I'm not sure.." You heard your partner echo your statement in question form as you looked for street signs through the rain. Glancing back at your phone, you saw the screen light up again, this time it was a warning label.

Your battery was almost dead...

"C-Clay.. My phone is going to die.." You murmured softly, your heart filling with dread as you turned down your brightness and closed any unnecessary apps.

There was a little bit of clattering and shuffling on the line as Clay hurriedly walked from the windows to the door, trying to see you from the home. "G-give me landmarks! Hurry!" He practically begged as you shot up from your bench, ignoring the burning soreness in your legs.

Spinning around quickly, you began listing off a few company buildings you saw, trying to shout over the rain and a few cars driving by. "Yeah-yeah! There's also that little sushi place beside the restaurant too.."

You heard the furious typing of his computer before another almost sob of relief. "You're on Rosewood Avenue... How the hell did you run that far? Okay, you're going to walk in the opposite direction of the sushi place until you reach a road called Miller Road, got that?" He waited for a verbal noise of agreement before continuing, "Once you get there, turn left and keep walking straight until you get to a steakhouse. I'll meet you half way, if you don't see me there, don't move unless you have to. Got it?" He asked firmly, with a small hint of desperation in his tone.

You rubbed your face as you mentally repeated the directions to yourself. "Yeah.. Yeah.. I got it." You began to walk along the sidewalks, your shoulders beginning to tremble from the water induced shivers trailing up and down your spine.

"..(Y/n)?"

"Yeah?"

"I lov-"

Your phone died..

Pulling the device away from your head, you pressed the buttons a few times before groaning and shoving it into your pockets as you began to walk.

Your mind was blurry but also hyper aware along the walk to the road where Clay told you to go. 'What was he going to say? If... He doesn't hate me... was he going to say- No.. no. He hadn't said that line in over a few months now.. No reason why he would say it now..' You mentally scolded yourself.

The rain didn't seem to be too keen on letting up as you walked through large rippling puddles. Your clothes were soaked, your hair completely drenched and you were pretty sure you were gonna need to buy a new phone with how much your current one was getting waterlogged..

You rose your arm to shield your face from the onslaught of water that a car had caused by driving through a large puddle before running your hand down your face.

Part of you was still a bit.. angry... at Clay... He had ignored you for so long and wanted nothing to do with you.. Then suddenly you spill hot coffee on yourself and then boom, you have the man more focused than when he has a good speed run seed. What about all those times you were begging him to come to bed, or at least eat dinner at the table with you? Did you only matter when you were in pain?

Biting your lip, you shook off the thought as you looked up again to see the steakhouse that you were directed to go to, the signs glowingly and people shuffling in and out through the doors...

Then there was another man, standing under a large black umbrella wearing a damp lime green hoodie...

Only you'd recognize that face anywhere where others wouldn't.. Standing in the street lights perfectly was your boyfriend, Clay.

Your heart trembled but also melted slightly upon seeing that he wasn't paying attention to his screen anymore. You. He was focused on finding you...

As you began to walk closer, you saw him lift his head and stare at you for a few seconds before dropping the umbrella and lunge forward to wrap you in a loving embrace. "I'm sorry.." Was the first thing he whispered, his voice almost as hoarse as yours. "I know.. that a simple apology will never excuse what I put you through... You cared for me, and even after a stupidly ignored you... You still didn't leave, or get angry. I don't deserve you, I know that, and you have every right to be upset, angry or whatever you're feeling right now.. Please, it doesn't matter how long it takes... Just let me make it up to you and let me prove myself worthy of your love again.."

Your lips parted in surprise as you stared at him, the streetlight poorly capturing his normal beauty, but still doing it well enough that you felt your heart soar. "Clay..." Your eyes traced his features, his puffy and reddened eyes and his cheeks stained with tear tracks, "You have a lot to work and make up for... I'm not going to forgive you immediately, but I'm not going to leave you.. We can work things out.. Together, okay?"

He eagerly nodded and gently held your face in his hands before pressing a light kiss to your forehead. "I'll break away from video editing and streaming for a while.. So I can focus on repairing things with you.."

You buried your face into the male's sweater, that was beginning to become soaked as well from the rain and you, and closed your eyes as you wrapped your arms around him.

"(Y/n)?"

"Mm..?"

"I love you."

"I love you too, Clay."

#dreamwastaken #dreamwastaken x reader #dreamwastaken x you #dreamsmp #dreamwastaken x y/n #reader insert #x reader #dream x reader #dream x you #mcyt #mcyt x reader

[icarushasfallenfromthestars]

That dream angst fuckin wrecked my heart..any chance for a part 2 with comfort(im not the og requester so if not thats fine its just OUGH my heart)

So both you and the og requester asked for a part 2, which means I'm definitely gonna do it! (I'd do it even if the og didn't ask so lmao) I HAD TO REWRITE THIS 12 GOD DAMN TIMES BECAUSE TUMBLR IS SHIT AT SAVING THINGS

I'm honestly so glad people enjoy my writings! Feel free to request more! My inbox is open and I have no requests lined up yet!

Once again. This is a completely fictitious story and version of Clay.

TW: Panic attacks, self deprecating thoughts,

Part one

Found (Outside The Screen) (Dream x GN! Reader) Part 2

"(Y/n)!"

His voice echoed through the house as you scrambled around corners to escape the possible wrath of your boyfriend. Or maybe even soon to be ex boyfriend.

Despite living in this house with him for a little over two years, it was beginning to feel like a maze. You couldn't tell which way was left and which way was right, your head spinning with panic as you gasped for breath.

He's gonna find you...

The house wasn't even that big, and quite an open concept, so you had no idea why you were finding it so confusing. All you knew at the moment was...

Get out.

Once your eyes landed on the door that lead out, you made a beeline towards it and flung it open. Maybe you should've known better than to attempt to run from the manhunt god...

The footsteps pounding against the floor not too far behind you startled you enough to jump outside and slam the door behind you in hopes of giving yourself enough time to run farther.

There were plenty of things failing to register in your mind as you ran down the empty sidewalks. Such as the poor choice (or lack) of shoes you were wearing, or even the heavy night rain pelting down on your shaking body.

Your lungs were burning.. But your brain had thrown itself so far into fight or flight mode that you had no care for anything around you, hardly blinking twice as the signs of unfamiliar street names flew past you.

Eventually, when you physically couldn't breathe any longer, you sat on a bench and took awhile to think. The consistent rain pelting down on your head was actually a decent grounder to help you snap yourself out of it... But that only caused more confusion and another wave of panic to wash over you.

Where... were you?

Doesn't matter. Don't go back.

Oh God... He hates you..

Why wouldn't he..?

He was too embarrassed to show you to his chat!

What did you do that was so embarrassing?

God.. What was so wrong with you that he stayed in his streaming room for days on end!?

Pulling your knees up to your chest, you choked back a few sobs, trying your best to keep what was left of your composure. Very quickly, however, you gave up on trying to hold yourself together and broke down, hiding your face in your knees.

Time seemed to pass by way too quickly but also way too slowly at the same time.. Like time itself was giving you the one finger salute. When you finally stopped crying, you leaned back against the back of the bench and gave a shaky sigh before you decided to attempt to think rationally again.

You had no clue where you were. Nothing looked familiar. What time is it? No clue, you don't have your... Your phone!

You quickly scrambled to your pocket to pull out the cellular device, and stared at the black screen for a few seconds. Anxiety was the reason for your hesitance as you stared into your reflection, frowning slightly. Without thinking twice, you pressed the button and the screen lit up with various arrays of colours.

78 Missed calls from Clay💚

2 Missed calls from George👓🇬🇧

7 Missed calls from Sapnap🔥

Was... He so mad that his friends were trying to yell at you too? You tilted your head slightly and scrolled through the other notifications on your lockscreen.

Twitter seemed to be losing their minds over your boyfriend's stream and wondering who the stranger was. Seeing the headlines flooded you with immeasurable guilt and you almost put your phone down again, if your phone didn't start buzzing.

You glanced down at the screen and say Clay was making call number 79... Man, he was persistent.. and he would probably continue to call until you answered...

Your finger hovered over the decline button, before slowly moving over and landing on the green one instead. "...Hello...?"

"(Y/n)...?" Had... He been crying...? "Oh my god! You're alive!" He gasped out with glee before giving a few sobs of... relief...?

"...You... Aren't... Mad?" You whispered very softly and hesitantly, your voice scratchy and sore from crying.

He sighed and there was a little bit of shuffling as well as a few male voices in the background. "No. Not in the slightest... Where are you? I want to apologize in person.. And when it doesn't sound like you're in a hurricane.."

You lifted your head up to look at the rain that was continuing to pelt down on you before looking around. "..I'm not sure.." You heard your partner echo your statement in question form as you looked for street signs through the rain. Glancing back at your phone, you saw the screen light up again, this time it was a warning label.

Your battery was almost dead...

"C-Clay.. My phone is going to die.." You murmured softly, your heart filling with dread as you turned down your brightness and closed any unnecessary apps.

There was a little bit of clattering and shuffling on the line as Clay hurriedly walked from the windows to the door, trying to see you from the home. "G-give me landmarks! Hurry!" He practically begged as you shot up from your bench, ignoring the burning soreness in your legs.

Spinning around quickly, you began listing off a few company buildings you saw, trying to shout over the rain and a few cars driving by. "Yeah-yeah! There's also that little sushi place beside the restaurant too.."

You heard the furious typing of his computer before another almost sob of relief. "You're on Rosewood Avenue... How the hell did you run that far? Okay, you're going to walk in the opposite direction of the sushi place until you reach a road called Miller Road, got that?" He waited for a verbal noise of agreement before continuing, "Once you get there, turn left and keep walking straight until you get to a steakhouse. I'll meet you half way, if you don't see me there, don't move unless you have to. Got it?" He asked firmly, with a small hint of desperation in his tone.

You rubbed your face as you mentally repeated the directions to yourself. "Yeah.. Yeah.. I got it." You began to walk along the sidewalks, your shoulders beginning to tremble from the water induced shivers trailing up and down your spine.

"..(Y/n)?"

"Yeah?"

"I lov-"

Your phone died..

Pulling the device away from your head, you pressed the buttons a few times before groaning and shoving it into your pockets as you began to walk.

Your mind was blurry but also hyper aware along the walk to the road where Clay told you to go. 'What was he going to say? If... He doesn't hate me... was he going to say- No.. no. He hadn't said that line in over a few months now.. No reason why he would say it now..' You mentally scolded yourself.

The rain didn't seem to be too keen on letting up as you walked through large rippling puddles. Your clothes were soaked, your hair completely drenched and you were pretty sure you were gonna need to buy a new phone with how much your current one was getting waterlogged..

You rose your arm to shield your face from the onslaught of water that a car had caused by driving through a large puddle before running your hand down your face.

Part of you was still a bit.. angry... at Clay... He had ignored you for so long and wanted nothing to do with you.. Then suddenly you spill hot coffee on yourself and then boom, you have the man more focused than when he has a good speed run seed. What about all those times you were begging him to come to bed, or at least eat dinner at the table with you? Did you only matter when you were in pain?

Biting your lip, you shook off the thought as you looked up again to see the steakhouse that you were directed to go to, the signs glowingly and people shuffling in and out through the doors...

Then there was another man, standing under a large black umbrella wearing a damp lime green hoodie...

Only you'd recognize that face anywhere where others wouldn't.. Standing in the street lights perfectly was your boyfriend, Clay.

Your heart trembled but also melted slightly upon seeing that he wasn't paying attention to his screen anymore. You. He was focused on finding you...

As you began to walk closer, you saw him lift his head and stare at you for a few seconds before dropping the umbrella and lunge forward to wrap you in a loving embrace. "I'm sorry.." Was the first thing he whispered, his voice almost as hoarse as yours. "I know.. that a simple apology will never excuse what I put you through... You cared for me, and even after a stupidly ignored you... You still didn't leave, or get angry. I don't deserve you, I know that, and you have every right to be upset, angry or whatever you're feeling right now.. Please, it doesn't matter how long it takes... Just let me make it up to you and let me prove myself worthy of your love again.."

Your lips parted in surprise as you stared at him, the streetlight poorly capturing his normal beauty, but still doing it well enough that you felt your heart soar. "Clay..." Your eyes traced his features, his puffy and reddened eyes and his cheeks stained with tear tracks, "You have a lot to work and make up for... I'm not going to forgive you immediately, but I'm not going to leave you.. We can work things out.. Together, okay?"

He eagerly nodded and gently held your face in his hands before pressing a light kiss to your forehead. "I'll break away from video editing and streaming for a while.. So I can focus on repairing things with you.."

You buried your face into the male's sweater, that was beginning to become soaked as well from the rain and you, and closed your eyes as you wrapped your arms around him.

"(Y/n)?"

"Mm..?"

"I love you."

"I love you too, Clay."

#dreamwastaken #mcyt x reader #dreamwastaken x reader #dream smp #x reader #reader insert #dreamwastaken x you #mcyt

[sebspocketsquare]

Wishing you were here... 1

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Reader (chatroom)

A/N: Hey guys! Here’s the first real thing I’ve worked on this year... oops! Anyway, I’ve had a lot of fun writing this, so I hope you enjoy reading it! Part 1 is mostly just a preview of what’s to come, I have other, longer chapters written and I’m thinking I’ll post once a week! Let me know what you think! (PS i did put a ‘read more’ link in here, so hopefully it works!)

Warnings: language, maybe? flirting? pet names

Masterlist

The only light illuminating your bedroom is the one that comes from your computer screen - bright, almost blinding, and making your eyes silently scream for sleep. 

You’re moments from giving in, from turning away from the chat room you’d found your way into a few weeks ago, hoping that you’d find someone to take the edge off your loneliness.

Unfortunately, all you’d managed to find was creepy 60 year old men begging to see your breasts. You weren’t here for it. 

A long yawn escapes you, the kind that makes you raise your arms over your head and extend your entire spine. You’re in the process of lowering your arms to exit out of the chat program, when a new IM appears on your screen.

[Sarge1917]: Hello.

You refrain from rolling your eyes, willing yourself to believe that this one won’t be a creep… but there’s a nagging thought in the back of your head, one that whispers: he’s just like the rest.

You reply anyway.

[SpaceKitten]: Hi there.

It takes a few moments before you receive a response.

[Sarge1917]: How are you?

You’re used to the first question someone asks you being “pics?” Or “dtf?” You can’t even think of one person on this god awful site that asked you how you were.

[SpaceKitten]: Honestly.. I’m exhausted. How are you?

His reply is almost instant this time.

[Sarge1917]: Oh, about the same. It’s pretty late where I am.. nearly morning, but I just can’t sleep. What’s got you up?

The fact that he has taken the time to try to have a normal conversation with you has you appalled… but also intrigued.

[SpaceKitten]: My mind won’t stop racing. I’m up all night, every night. I’d blame insomnia, but…

You hit the send button before you realize it. 

  [Sarge1917]: but…?

You don’t expect him to reply so quickly and you face an internal struggle: do you be honest, or do you lie? 

He’s a complete stranger, so why not tell the truth?

[SpaceKitten]: Honestly, I’ve never liked sleeping alone.. Once the sun sets and night takes over I.. I’m overwhelmed with how lonely I really am. I can’t stop thinking about it.

He doesn’t respond straight away this time, and you’re afraid you might’ve scared him off. Fiddling with a random toy on your desk, you anxiously await the sound of a new IM coming through.

[Sarge1917]: We have more in common than you think. I know that feeling, exactly, and I wouldn’t wish it on anyone. I’m sorry.

You’re chewing your lip as you re-read each word, letting it soak in. 

A total creep would never speak to you in such a sweet way, right? 

You decide to be brave.

[SpaceKitten]: I keep telling myself that Mr. Right will come along some day and sweep me off my feet, but.. The more I think about it, the more it seems unlikely.

[Sarge1917]: Why’s that?

You sit back in your chair for a moment, letting out a long sigh as you contemplate your response. You’d been honest with him so far, so why not continue on that note?

[SpaceKitten]: Honestly?

[Sarge1917]: Honestly.

Taking in a large breath, you write out your reply.

[SpaceKitten]: Honestly.. most of the men I’ve gone on dates with, and the ones I’ve met here only want one thing from me.. and I’m not looking for just that, you know? I want something.. real, I guess? That probably sounds stupid..

His response is delayed for a few moments, but when it finally shows on your screen, you have to bite back a smile.

[Sarge1917]: Not stupid at all.

[Sarge1917]: In fact, I’d like to apologize on behalf of all of the men who have made you feel like a sex object.

[Sarge1917]: Nowadays, most men are.. for a lack of a better word, pigs. It makes all of us look bad.

[Sarge1917]: You deserve better than that. You deserve to be treated like a goddess.

[SpaceKitten]: Oh, I don’t know about a ‘goddess’, but.. I’d like to at least be treated like a person.

[Sarge1917]: Like an equal.

[SpaceKitten]: It’s like you read my mind.

[Sarge1917]: (:

You’re not sure how late you stayed up talking to your new mystery friend, mostly because you end up falling asleep at the keyboard. The only reason you wake is the sun peeking through the curtains and directly on your face. 

The first thing you’re acutely aware of is that your back and neck are killing you. You’ve got drool stuck to your cheek and you’re quite sure the shape of the keys are embedded into the side of your face. 

You couldn’t look worse. 

The computer is still up and running, your chat app still open, along with your conversation.

You feel guilt flood your belly immediately.

While having such a pleasant conversation, you fall asleep on him? What kind of jerk does that make you?

The guilt starts to swirl and alter to another emotion as you read the last bit of your conversation over, the skin up your neck and to your cheeks burning with.. embarrassment? Desire? You weren’t sure.

[Sarge1917]: Well, kitten, it would appear you’ve fallen asleep on me. Can’t say I blame you, it’s nearly 7am here..

[Sarge1917]: I really enjoyed talking with you. And I’m glad I was able to help you find a way to sleep.

There’s a long time gap between the last message and the next.

[Sarge1917]: I was thinking.. maybe if you wanted.. we could talk again? I don’t know what it is, but.. I really would like to get to know you better.

[Sarge1917]: Would that be alright with you?

[Sarge1917]: I hope so.. Sweet dreams, kitten.

How could you possibly say no?

Night after night, week after week, you fall asleep at your desk messaging back and forth with Sarge. He’s sweet, charming and almost a little too perfect in some ways. You’d be lying if you said you hadn’t grown attached - the kind of attached when chatting with him was the highlight of your day; the kind where you’d once spent an entire hour wondering what the color of his eyes were and if he has a beard or not. 

It’s the kind where you’re afraid that someday, he might disappear.

6 months later, you were still conversing every day, but that fear just seemed to grow and grow. How long would this last?

You’re in your usual spot at your computer with your usual snacks, listening to music. It’s late, your neighbors have already gone to sleep, and it almost feels like you’re the only person left awake in the entire world.

Until a new IM notification appears on your screen.

TAGS: (sorry if you dont like being tagged, its been so long since i’ve posted idk who to tag anymore lolol. @mindingmyownbusiness @plumfondler  @buckybarnesappreciationsociety @loricameback @tinaferraldo @geminimoonbeamx  @preserumsteverogers @moderapoppins @lowkeysebby @buckyshattergirl  @jayattemptstoruletheworld   @the-observant-fangirl @moondancewrites @moonbeambucky @trinityjadec  @stevieang  @bionic-buckyb @eyecandybarnes @propertyofpoeandbucky @promarvelfangirl @ballyhoobarnes @bucky-plums-barnes @cate-lynne @witchymarvelspacecase @imaginingbucky @theimpossibleg1rl

#bucky x reader #wishing you were here.. #sometimes i write #sebspocketsquare #bucky barnes x reader #bucky fic

[spiffysixxsense]

Hello annoying best friend here to fulfill my duty by asking you to answer all of the cute asks

angel; do you have a nickname?

not really. my name is already short and I don't have a prominent quality to nickname me after. The only person who refers to me as anything other than my name is my boyfriend, but I don't think “babe/baby” really counts as a nickname lol

awe; how old are you?

24

baby; favorite color?

dark teal (blue-green? I've never found a good name for my favorite color)

bloop; spirit animal?

so because I didn't have a good answer for this, I decided to google a quiz to find out, lol. My answer was a deer. here's why;

When you have the deer as spirit animal, you are highly sensitive and have a strong intuition. By affinity with this animal, you have the power to deal with challenges with grace. You master the art of being both determined and gentle in your approach.

The deer totem wisdom imparts those with a special connection with this animal with the ability to be vigilant, move quickly, and trust their instincts to get out the trickiest situations

blossom; favorite book/movie/song?

i don't really have a favorite book, i don't read much outside of school (I wish i did)

movie: A Beautiful Mind

song: oh dear lord i cannot pick just one, but all-time favorite band of mine is Shinedown

blush; what was your stuffed animal as a child?

a little stuffed dog that looked like Kipper from the TV show, I still have him :)

breeze; most precious childhood memory?

lmao what came to mind was when i pledged to never drink, smoke, or say bad words. two out of fucking three ain't bad i guess. 

bright; mermaids or fairies?

(honestly neither but) fairies

bubbles; do you have a best friend?

given the asker, i would say yes :) also i am lame and my boyfriend is also my best friend 

buttercup; showers or baths?

S H O W E R S. hate baths!

butterfly; dream destination?

I've never had a huge desire to travel honestly. like sure i could say Italy or Greece look beautiful, but the actual act of traveling overseas really stresses me out lol. so i would have to say more like upper midwest, like Maine, in the fall time for all the pretty trees.

buttons; are you religious or spiritual?

i am neither

calm; favorite scent?

anything fruity - pineapple, mango, berries, apples. at least in terms of what candles i like lol.

candlelight; what did you dream about last night?

i do not remember anything from last night - the last dream i remember involved my boyfriend, dad and i being lost up north lol

charming; have you ever been in love?

currently 

cozy; eye/hair color?

hazel / brunette 

cuddly; what’s your favorite time period?

the 1970′s for the fashion

cupcake; favorite flower/plant?

love me a good succulent

cute; what did you get on your last birthday?

well this last birthday was amidst quarantine, so I got some candles and granola (my boyfriend knows me well lol)

cutie pie; most precious item you own?

i have no idea? what an odd question? probably some stuffed animal?

cutsie; what makes you happy?

picnics, alone time, my boyfriend, my cat choosing to cuddle with me.

daisies; describe a moment when you felt free.

I really cant think of a time I've ever felt truly free. maybe when i drove myself to school earlier this year & didn't have to wait for someone to pick me up? 

daydream; how do you want to be remembered?

as a light in others lives. happy, bubbly. things i currently am not

daylight; favorite album of all time?

gosh these dang music questions. well, Nickelback - All the Right Reasons was the first album i ever bought myself. then maybe Shinedown - The Sound of Madness (i cant pick one OKAY)

dear; zodiac sign?

Taurus 

delightful; concerts or museums?

concerts

dimples; have you ever written a letter?

yes? this question makes me feel old, lol. 

dobby; dream job?

criminologist. some way to be reducing the mass incarceration rate in the US. 

doll; how do you like to dress?

comfy, v necks and leggings. As i have gotten older i have slowly wanted to be more feminine i think, because i really want some sundresses for summer lol

dovey; any paranormal/magical experiences?

one! when i was 12ish, i swear i saw a reflection of a uniformed man (like old school soldier uniform - blue blazer with gold cufflinks) behind me in the glass of my snakes tank at the time. it was weird because the only reason i even looked that way was because my snake started shaking his tail against the glass, something that corn snakes do when they are scared, but also something that in his entire life had never done unprompted ever. 

dreams; do you want or have any tattoos?

want yes, have no

drizzle; do you believe in aliens?

100%. no way we are alone in this universe

euphoric; talk about someone you love.

he makes my days so much better :)

fairy; do you have a pet?

I have one little old kitty :)

fluffy; ocean or mountain?

to vacation, ocean. to live, mountain

forever; where do you feel time stop?

the secretary of state? lol

froglet; are you a good plant owner?

I've never owned a plant lol

garden; how many languages do you know?

one :(

gem; who are your favorite tumblrs?

@cy-ne-fin 

giggles; what is your aesthetic of choice?

sepia photography/old books that have yellowed into sepia. or fresh greenery on white marble. 

glittery; do you like anons? why/why not?

i don't really get any anymore, but as long as they are nice or just questions/venting, im down. don't be offended if i never answer though, for some reason i never get Tumblr notifications lol

glow; list the top 5 things you like about yourself

im compassionate

im empathetic (which is similar but im struggling to get to 5 lol)

im goal-oriented

im determined (once i have said goal. again, related lol) 

i guess i like my lips/lip shape

heart; silk or lace?

lace

honey; coffee or tea? how do you take it?

tea. iced, black or green really, with sugar. 

hugsy; do you enjoy people watching or bird watching more? why?

bird watching because it means i am probably alone and in nature as opposed to somewhere in a crowd of people. and i wont feel creepy for watching the birds lol

hunnybunch; what sounds help you sleep?

white noise, a fan running. if that's not enough, i enjoy asmr. if i am really struggling/having anxiety, i will look up sleep stories from the headspace app on youtube (life hack to not have to pay for the app lol)

jewel; what’s your favorite kind of weather?

to be outside, i enjoy just warm enough to be comfy in pants and a t-shirt (so like 65F-ish) and sunny.To be inside, i love when it is cooler (like 50F?) and raining. I love the look, sound, and smell of rain but it is usually just inconvenient to be in. 

jiggly; what do you usually like to do on weekends?

well now all days are the same for me, #quarantine, so the same thing i do every day, just about nothing, lol

joy; do you laugh loudly or giggle more?

i guess laugh loudly because i am a loud person in general. i have a deep voice

kinky; do you blush easily?

i don't think so, my embarrassment turns into sweat, not blush, lmao

kisses; what romantic cliché do you wish for most?

i guess being proposed to someday? but i don't have a certain dream way of it happening, just the fact that its happening is enough for me lol. id enjoy if someone (cough Elle or also maybe Michael lol) were secretly filming and/or taking photos of it? I am not sure how you'd manage that though

kitty; what’s your favorite time of the day?

late at night when everything is quiet

ladybug; what’s your favorite artist to listen to when you’re sad?

old school three days grace (one-x album in particular)

love; what is your favorite season and why?

i always gravitate to fall for the leaves and pumpkin patches. but honestly, i think my favorite season is spring. i love the newly budding trees and flowers, the feeling of renewal, the release from the horrible Michigan winter lol, but most importantly, spring time for my whole life as of yet has always meant that school is over for the semester! as opposed to the fall when the semester starts. this is very long winded but spring final answer lol

lovey; what is your favorite flavor of macaron and ice cream?

I've never had a macaron and blue moon ice cream 

magic; what are five flaws you have?

ooooo boy

im short tempered/angry too much 

im unmotivated (which is confusing maybe because i said i am determined earlier. you see, once i HAVE a goal i feel determined to finish it. but i am unmotivated to create said goals, lol) 

im nonconfrontational to a fault where i always put others’ feelings before my own

i let fear of change stop me from ever taking risks/ am anxious

i am stubborn and sometimes have a hard time admitting i am wrong

moonlight; do you prefer soft pastels, warm neutrals, or cool darks?

this depends - screw pastels. warm neutrals for makeup purposes, but cool darks for aesthetic or decor purposes

munchkin; what do you look for in your significant other?

someone who feels like home. I am not entirely sure how else to explain that. you just feel peace and content with them. 

paddywack; how would you describe a perfect date?

something that allows you to only be with your date - so like a picnic or hike or just a walk even. my boyfriend and i liked to walk around in the fall for me to take pictures of leaves while he played pokemon go (man i miss the pokemon go summer and i have never even PLAYED it, it was just so fun to be with him while he played)

pebbles; how do you spend free time by yourself?

on youtube usually

precious; what is something valuable that you learned in your life?

The blood of the covenant is thicker than the water of the womb. if your family is toxic for whatever reason, you do not owe them your time strictly because they are family. 

pretty; do you like to cook or bake more?

cook, im not super into sweets & i want to enjoy the final product

prince; how would you describe your handwriting?

normal? like its legible but its not pretty or cute

princess; do you play any instruments? if not, are there any you wish you could play?

no:( wish i could play bass or drums

prinky; how do you relieve stress?

i don't :)

i really don't have an answer other than solving whatever is stressing me out, lol. i wish i had more mechanisms to calm me down but nothing i have tried has ever really worked

pumpkin; what is your favourite kind of fruit/vegetable?

you know these favorites questions are hard for me lol. right now, i am loving watermelon, but i also love most fruits. kiwis! vegetable, i feel like i have to say potato lol

rainbow; what was the last line of the last book you read?

lol the last thing i read had to be some academic text, so that's boring

roses; what is the most significant event in your life so far?

meeting Alex i guess, it changes my whole life path to have someone you want to do life with 

smile; what is one thing that has greatly affected you?

quarantine? lol

shine; art or music?

music is art.

shimmer; do animals tend to like you?

i think so. Elle’s dog griffin loves me for some reason lol

smitten; do you collect anything?

not really

smoochies; how many pillows do you sleep with?

4

snuggle; what is your favourite candy?

jolly ranchers 

snuggly; do you have a camera? if so, what kind?

nope

sparkle; do you wear jewelry?

nope

spooky; sunrise or sunset?

sunset

sprinkles; do you like to listen to music with headphones or no headphones?

headphones

starlight; what was your favourite show as a child?

Spongebob probably. unless we are talking like really tiny, toddler age, then Winnie the pooh

soft; describe your favourite spot in your house.

i live in a 2 bedroom apartment, there arent any spots. lol. my bed i guess

soothe; digital or vinyl?

i mean digital for convenience but vinyl for aesthetic 

squeezed; who do you miss right now?

i mean the only person i really actively miss ever is Alex. @cy-ne-fin sometimes, but i have also grown used to living away from each other

sugary; what traits do you value most in friends?

loyalty, honesty, & humor

sunshine; do you prefer for things to be practical or aesthetically pleasing?

if i must pick, practical. 

sweet; do you find it easy to open up?

absolutely not. i feel like a burden with my feelings even though i shouldn't 

sweetie; do you like kids? if so, do you ever want to have any?

honestly not really. am on the fence still about ever having any 

thimble; is there somebody you look up to? who are they?

not really

toot; what is something you find unique about yourself?

i am as average as they come man, nothing is unique about me lol

tootsie; what kind of friend are you?

like a background friend? like i am not very social, so we do not have to talk every day to be friends. so like im here if you need me, but i enjoy alone time. 

treasure; what was something that made you smile today?

the way my boyfriend looks at me, & as i was working on this my cat came to cuddle, which i gave as an answer earlier before he jumped up here :)

velvet; are you an early bird or a night owl?

night owlllllll

whiffle; if you could have a magical power, what would it be?

the power to heal those who are hurting (including myself)

whimsical; do you prefer doing stuff at home or going out?

home home home home

whiskers; do you usually wear makeup?

not anymore, i did in high school/early college years. not I've stopped caring

wiggly; are you a messy or tidy person?

messy? kinda in the middle really. 

wispy; do you like the place where you grew up? do you think you will live there when you get older?

my state, sure. my city in particular is definitely pretty boring

wobbly; have you ever wished upon a star?

I've never seen one :(

[kweebtrash]

Or Nah (M)

Messy Ch. 2

Pairing(s): OC X Johnny (features other members)

Genre: College AU, Fuckboy AU

Summary: Fuckboys are basically good for one thing. You hit it and quit it- except when his voice draws you in, his body keeps you there, and dumb ass feelings linger making things particularly messy.

Warnings: drugs, anxiety attacks, night terrors

Features: POV changes, bathroom/rough sex, fingering, blowjobs

Word Count: around 14k

A/N: ‘they’ and ‘she’ are used interchangeably on purpose.

Messy Masterlist  Buy me a Ko-Fi    Other Stories

Lucas Pov

My phone was vibrating against the glass top of the coffee table ripping me out of sleep. The incessant buzzing was driving me crazy especially since my head was still fuzzy from last night. I barely remember getting home...well to Quinn and Eri's place anyway. I groaned and slammed my hand on the table feeling around until my phone was in hand. I squinted an eye open, peeking at the influx of messages that continued to scroll about my screen. I opened the messenger app and read through the dozens of texts. Johnny had added me to the group chat shortly after I met him and Jaehyun during ‘Welcome Weekend’. It was how i had found out about their party and now it was how I found out that Eri had hooked up with Johnny. He was supposedly the “king of of one night stands” and Eri was just another one to be added to his list. Or that was how it would all start out. Clearly, Ten and Yuta had met their match once they started playing with her. I wouldnt be surprised if Johnny started drooling over her too.

There was something about Eri. I still hadn’t quite figured it out myself. She was far from my type-which is why I first got with Quinn. Quinn was soft, small, pale blonde and a little ditzy- perfect. Eri on the other hand was raw, loud, obnoxious, and volatile. Dominant yet bratty, needing to be in control of everything and the first to protect if needed. She always ended up “momming” Quinn and I no matter what. She was also gorgeous in a way I didn't often see back home- tattoos everywhere, her hair a mish mash of colors, her skin deep, rich and intoxicatingly sweet. She had managed to seduce every last one of us. We were putty in her hands. Eri and I were only friends but i would be lying if I failed to admit that there were times where all i thought about was being between her legs for days on end.

I sighed and finally sat up, rubbing the sleep from my eyes. I tossed my two cents into the group conversation and yawned deeply. The smell of something cooking caught my attention and i realized I was fucking starving. I looked over at the small kitchen and saw Eri standing in front of the stove in nothing but her underwear and a little ass tank top, looking like i should eat her for breakfast instead. I adjusted myself on the couch and opened my camera, zooming in close to get the best view. I grabbed a pic and sent it to the chat. They would all be jealous of me getting to see this first thing in the morning-afternoon….whatever.. “Babeeeeessss, whatcha making me?”

“I had some pancake mix in the back of the fridge that was still good so there's that. There’s also some left over pizza. Breakfast of champions.”

“You look like a hot little wifey cooking for me. Just saying.”

“You know what you could say? Nothing.” She came towards me with the plate of food. “Here.”

My camera was still open so i faced it towards us under the guise of taking a selfie but i turned my head towards her, just as i hit the button, giving her a kiss. I posted it to the group chat too just to see if i could piss Johnny off. “How's your vag?” I asked Eri as i sent the picture.

“I survived I guess. My thighs still fucking hurt.” I moved my legs so she could sit on the couch beside me.

“Was he better than me?” I asked just out of curiosity.

“Lucas, you know I dont compare anyone. But he didn’t go down on me so he's already losing, just saying.”

I picked up one of the pancakes and shoved it in my mouth. “Fuckin’ pussy.”

“Dont talk with your mouth full. You're gonna choke.” She grabbed her PS4 controller and turned on the console as well as the tv. She flipped through the apps pulling up Netflix. “You wanna watch something? Quinn said they'd be coming home soon but i don't know how true that is.”

“Heard she was at T.Y.’s place.” I replied in between chewing and shoving another pancake in my mouth.

“Yep. Fucking him this time, i guess.”

I swallowed and shrugged. “I'll ask her to take a shower before we fuck.”

“How gentlemanly of you, Lucas.” She scoffed and started typing in the name of whatever show she wanted to watch. I noticed the hickies that were covering her dark skin, blending in with the tattoos on her back and shoulders.

“Damn, he did a number on you.” I said leaning in closer to her and running my fingers along the bruises. She winced a bit and tugged away from me.

“It's fine. I've had worse.”

“Yeah like when Ten accidentally cut you so deep you had to get stitches and Quinn wanted to deck him.”

She inhaled sharply. “Not one of our best moments. I squirmed by accident so I guess it was my fault.”

“Or he could’ve not hurt you.” I wiped my mouth on the back of my hand before kissing her shoulder.

“Eh. Whats the fun in that?”

I kissed up her neck, resisting the urge to bite her and make my marks better than Johnny's. “I make you cum just fine without hurting you.”

“Question.” She said, turning to me. “Do you like choking me?”

“What? Uh...i mean...it gets you off right?”

“Yeah, but do you like it?”

I scratched at the back of my neck. “I mean….”

She sighed. “Nevermind.”

“Aww, Eri, don't be mad. I dont mind doing it for you!”

“It's fine. Im not mad.” She curled up against my chest, wrapping her arm around my waist, and setting her legs on my lap.

I rubbed her thighs slowly, going up and down the length of them and paying extra attention to her hips. “Did you try and get him to do it?”

“Yeah, well sorta. I didnt say it outright but i kinda hinted at it. He pulled his hand away like he didnt want to touch me.”

“Not for nothing Eri but you’re like the only chick who's like ‘CHOKE ME’ during the first fuck. It can be kinda scary and not everyone's into that.”

“Fuckin’ wack is what that is.” She laughed.

“Maybe he'll do it next time.”

“Next time?” She scoffed. “I doubt there’s gonna be a next time.”

“You'd be surprised.” I kissed the top of her head and kept her close, kind of wondering if I should ask her if she wanted to fuck. It was too much work to do anal right now but maybe she'd at least want it slow. I could do that. I slipped my fingers underneath the strap of her tank top moving it down her shoulder.

“Lucas.”

I hated when she said my name like that. It was like i was in trouble with my mom. I kept rubbing small circles on her thigh, pretending like i wasn’t doing anything. “Hmm? What?”

“Cut it out.” She was always much stricter with how much we fucked, unlike Quinn. Eri was picky and everything had to be on her terms, which was why i always got reprimanded. I knew she still couldn’t resist me, especially when i gave her my puppy dog look.

“I swear i'm not doing anything!”

She rolled her eyes and pushed away from me. “Not right now.” She got up from the couch and headed back towards the kitchen. I stuffed the last pancake in my mouth and followed after her.

“Come on! I'll go slow! It wont even hurt. You know i take good care of you.” I chewed faster and swallowed hard before she yelled at me again.

“My thighs are killing me. I don’t even think i have the strength to open them for you to eat me out.”

“Well...you wanna at least suck me off?” She glared at me so hard that I stepped back in case her fist wanted to connect with my stomach. She was always an aggressive lover. “S-sorry…”

“You'd probably taste like pool water and sweat. No thanks.”

“Ok, you can pull one of my numbers and ask me to shower before hand. It's just...you know how i get in the morning, babes.” i pouted at her, starting my puppy dog stare.

“Don’t look at me like that. You know i hate that.”

“Pretty please? Pleaaassseeeeeee.”

She set her little hand on my face, smooshing me away. “I dont have time. I have band practice tonight and it starts soon.”

“Just a quick one i promise!! I'll be done fast!”

She groaned. “Lucas, seriously??” She rolled her eyes and pinched the bridge of her nose. “Fine! FINE! I don’t know how you always convince me.”

“Because you can’t resist me, that's why.” I gave her a quick kiss before running towards the bathroom to shower. Honestly, i should probably bring my shower stuff to their house at some point so I could stop smelling like vanilla, and cookies, and marigolds or whatever they used. I chucked off my shorts, tossing them in the corner where Eri could get them and do the laundry for me later. I grabbed my toothbrush and slapped some toothpaste on it before getting in the shower. I turned it on full blast, preferring a cold shower than the usual depths of hell i had to suffer through when i showered with Eri or Quinn.

“Some random person added me on snapchat! Do you know a DJJ0209?!” i heard her yell at me. I almost choked on my toothbrush. I hoped the running water hid the sound of my laughter.

“Oh...no! I dont! Did you add them?!” i called back out to her before spitting toothpaste down the drain.

I could tell she was responding but i had no idea what it was. It was hard to hear her now with my head fully under the water. Hopefully it wasnt too important. I finished brushing my teeth and moved onto washing my hair, trying to get chlorine smell out of it.

“Did you hear me earlier?” her voice appeared from inside the bathroom.

“No, all i heard was someone random added you on snapchat. Who was it?”

“I have no clue. Probs some weirdo from online. I'm just gonna block it.”

“No,” i tried to keep a straight face even though she couldn’t see me behind the curtain. “Just accept it. I'm sure it's fine.”

“What the hell!? I got another one….wait this one has a little character thing. Kinda looks like Taeil…”

“Just accept them both. Who knows maybe you'll find the love of your life.” I snorted.

“Hmm yes how romantic. Mommy, daddy, How did you meet? Well son, your father sent me a dick pic on snapchat and I was so in love we instantly got married.”

“Aww, you're like a real life Cinderella.”

She hit the shower curtain, trying to get at me. “Shut up, dumbass. I have to leave here by 6, and it's a little after 4:30 now.”

“I'm coming! You wont be late.”

“Mhm.” I could hear her walking back out of the bathroom. I finished rinsing my hair and washed up quickly. I was done in a few minutes, pulling back the shower curtain to see that Eri had left a fresh towel on the toilet. She was seriously the best. I dried off a bit then wrapped the towel around my waist, heading back over to the couch. She was laying on her stomach, feet crossed at her ankles in the air and typing furiously on her phone. I leaned over the back of the couch and trailed my hand over her lower back, watching her tense for a second. She was way warmer than my hands were. I couldn’t help but wish I could play with her a bit before she left.

“You're freezing.” She said as she set her phone beside mine on the coffee table.

“It's too hot. I felt sticky.” i moved around the couch, taking my place beside her again. She scooted closer to me, her hand tugging at the towel and pulling it open.

“Let’s get this over with.” She said.

“Gee, dont sound so enthused.” I rolled my eyes as she giggled at me. In a way i knew she was joking but also she was probably ready to get going to band practice. It was important to her but so was i. She would make time for me. I cupped her face in my hands, pulling her close for a heated kiss while her hand fell between my thighs and groped my cock. I licked her lips before she let me in, my tongue filling up her mouth and making her squirm a bit. I loved the way it felt when we kissed. She was always a tease, hungry yet slow, or fast and harsh. You never knew what you were going to get. Whenever i could get a soft little moan out of her, it would go straight to my cock, making me breathe harder and want to fuck her for hours on end just to coax more out.

I slid my hand down her back, moving down to cup her ass. It was one of my favorite things about her. There was nothing better then seeing how good it looked while i fucked her from behind, better yet when i fucked her ass. I tried pulling her onto my lap but she let out a strained whimper.

“Careful…” She whispered. Ok, note to self, beat the shit out of Johnny next time i saw him for making my Eri so sore. I let go of her ass and opted for her hip again while my other hand slid under her tank top. I was already half hard, giving her some room to start stroking. I opened my legs wider as she rubbed her thumb over my head in slow circles making every nerve feel electrified. I was already wiggling my hips towards her palm, parting my lips to feed a deep groan down her throat. She already knew everything i loved, everything that turned me on, everything that could make me cum. She guided her kisses to my neck, sucking on my jugular just a bit before pressing her lips down my chest.

I relaxed my head back against the couch, my nails digging into the armrest when i felt her lips surrounding me. She eased herself down, little by little, stroking what she couldn't fit in her mouth. Her tongue circled around my head and she popped off it completely to kiss up and down my shaft. Her kisses slipped down to my balls, tongueing them just enough to make me almost lose my cool. I thrusted my hips more as i tried to get her to take me back in. She looked up at me, that same controlling look in her eye.

“You gonna behave?” She asked, raising a brow.

I licked my lips and looked at at her. “Are you?”

She sat up and pulled away from me. “I'll stop right now, Lucas. I swear.”

“No you wont.” I dared.

She scoffed and rolled her eyes. “Oh really?”

“Mhm.” i moved closer towards her, angling my head for a kiss which I knew she would pull away from. In that instant i grabbed her neck making it disappear in the coverage of my hand. Her whole body relaxed and her face fell into an expression of bliss. Her eyes were practically rolling back in her head as her giddy giggles became strained when i closed my fingers around her tighter. It was scary as all hell to do this and it wasn’t necessarily something I enjoyed but seeing how good it made her feel got me going even more. Over time i got used to it, especially when she'd clench around me and scratch at my back, her body begging me to choke her harder. “Keep sucking, babes. It feels so good when I'm in your mouth.” i swiped my thumb over her full bottom lip, watching as her tongue poked out to lick it.

I let her go then and she eased back down, sucking faster this time. Her cheeks were starting to hollow out dragging more moans out of me. I set my hand on the back of her head, adding just enough pressure to keep her in place. I trailed my other hand down her back, sliding one of my fingers underneath her panties to feel how wet she was. She was trying to squirm away from from me but i let my finger slide slowly up and down her lower lips, rubbing each drop of slick through her folds and around her clit. I shushed her gently, telling her that i just wanted to make her feel good. I loved when she came with me and i was hoping she would swallow if i had her distracted enough.

I made circles on her bundle of nerves with just the tip of my middle finger, finally managing to get a louder moan out of her. The timbre from those cute sounds were enough to make my toes curl. I choked back her name, opting to keep quiet for now so I could concentrate. Her warm hand cupped my balls then, squeezing each one slightly as her thumb pressed into the sensitive points. I was already starting to throb in her tight mouth and it was making my nails dig into her scalp harder. I felt her wiggle her hips, reminding me that my finger was still in her panties. I rocked my finger through her wetness one last time before pushing it in slowly. I let her fuck herself on it as much as she wanted, leaving her to control the pace while i focused on my impending orgasm. “Eri...fuck…” i whispered.

She pulled off in one slow drag, rolling my precum over her tongue. “You know the drill.”

I groaned. “Please, Eri? Please? Just this once? I promise i’ll-”

“No. You know the rules.”

“But Quinn-”

“Then you should've asked Quinn.” she snapped back.

I dodged her glare and nodded in defeat. One day I was going to get her to swallow but for now i guess i had to cum on myself….again. She switched out her mouth with her hand, fisting the head of my cock before sliding down my shaft and giving it a squeeze. Cum was already starting to dribble down her hand as her hold on me tightened and loosened with each stroke. She pressed her chest to mine, bringing my head closer to cover her neck in kisses and miniscule bites. Her nails were digging into shoulder ever so slightly and her angry, commanding tone melted into that dangerously sweet voice.

“Come on, baby boy. Cum for me.” she cooed.

I held onto her then, so fucking tight, trying to bury my scream into her skin. I felt my stomach heat up as i came all over myself, my thigh muscles tensing. I swallowed back, panting against her chest as i worked through the tail end of my high. She kissed the top of my head, running her fingers through my hair, until I regained my composure.

“I gotta get dressed now.” She said, wiping her hand on the towel. I slid my hand out of her panties and groaned as i looked up at her.

“Stay for a bit…”

“I cant, its’ already about to be five. Quinn's gonna be home soon and you should actually get to your dorm sometime soon. You have class tomorrow.”

“Fuck class…”

“If you skip i'm gonna beat your ass.” She slid off the couch and headed to her room. She didn’t bother closing the door as she pulled her tank top over her head and dropped her panties. I had to look away, knowing i would make a bigger mess if i kept staring.

--

Eri's PoV

I shoved open the apartment door, kicking off my boots that were starting to dig into my feet. It felt so good to be home instead of a tiny garage sweating my ass off. I lugged my guitar and amp back to my room trying to ignore the loud moans coming from Quinn's room. I set my instrument down in the little sacred corner I set up where it wouldn't be disturbed, making sure to keep my cords wrapped up. Now that I was finally in the semi-peacefulness of my room I could take off the clothes that seemed to be glued to me. I pulled off my shorts, taking my phone out of my back pocket. I hadn’t checked it in hours and i could see the screen full of notifications. One caught my eye in particular. I clicked on the little bell which opened up my snapchat. There was one photo notification from the username i didnt recognize from this afternoon. I was going to scream if it was a dick pic. I dont even know why i thought it was a good idea to listen to Lucas and accept the request.

I braced myself as i clicked on it, waiting for the worse, even closing my eyes a bit. But it wasn’t bad. In fact...it was just Johnny. Johnny?? I gripped my phone tighter, pulling it closer to my face to examine the cute puppy filter on his black and white selfie, a simple caption of ‘hey’ towards the bottom of the screen. I couldn’t help the smile that tugged on my lips. He looked incredibly cute and definitely less like an annoying fuckboy. My heart started beating faster as i realized i should respond to him. I looked like a mess and i had no idea what i should i take a picture of. My room wasn't that clean, my face was meh at best and it was way too early for ass pics. I stared into my full length mirror, accessing the damage of my makeup. With my crappy room lighting and the use of a hundred filters I could potentially pull off a worthwhile selfie to send.

I angled my phone from above and mulled through the filters, finding a cute cat one that smoothed out my face to an angelic glow and made me have giant doe eyes. When i was satisfied i snapped the pic and typed in ‘Hey yourself’ as the caption. I expected him to leave me on read for most of the night and moved onto the other notifications i had. There was a text message from Yuta showing off new hot pink rope he had gotten (one of my favorite colors), a text from Taeyong telling me that Quinn had left their vest there (which im sure he texted just to have an excuse to talk to me), and a comment from Ten on my latest instagram selfie i took at practice (when my makeup was not so gross). I went to work answering them making the minutes pass by, keeping my mind off the thought of waiting for Johnny’s response. Thankfully, the waiting was short lived.

It was another picture but this one wasn’t so innocent and cute. His shirt was halfway up his torso, exposing his abs and the trimmed line of hair that trailed below his belly button and disappeared under the waistband of his Supreme briefs that were barely covered by his sweatpants. They did no justice in hiding the thick bulge beneath. His caption this time was ‘wyd?’. I stared at the picture so intently that my eyes started to blur a bit. I hadn’t even noticed i was holding my breath until my chest struggled to expand. He was reminding me exactly why i ended up in his bed last night and why i still felt the ache in my thighs.

I wasn't going to snap him back this time. No way. I knew exactly what he was doing- just trying to get me back in his bed. I wasn't going to fall for it. I was going to let him think that i wasn't desperate and let him suffer. I set my phone face down on my bed and pulled off my fishnet stockings and my shirt, tossing them in my hamper. I whipped off my bra and pulled on the tank top i had earlier, returning to my comfy pj state. Flopping onto my mattress, i laid back and reached for the headphones that always resided beside my pillow. They were my prized possession, complete with perfect outside noise cancellation. I opened up my spotify and hit shuffle on one of my favorite albums, sighing contently as Quinn and Lucas’ moaning was finally blocked out. I set my phone on my stomach and closed my eyes. I could use another nap to be honest…

But first…

I opened up my snapchat again succumbing to the victory of being the last one to send a teasing picture. I put the hem of my tank top cheekily between my teeth while i pressed my boobs together, making them fuller and have optimum cleavage. My caption was just a response to his question; ‘nothing much. Hbu?’.

I was too damn weak for him. I knew what the hell was under his sweatpants already but somewhere deep in the back of my mind, no matter how much i tried to ignore it, i had been thinking about the way he felt inside me. The dull ache, his long fingers, every bite of his perfect teeth on my skin, the small growls that made every one of my hairs stand on end. I thought there wouldnt be a next time- That i would just have to chalk him up to another one night stand- but now i knew he was interested in something a little more and i could play my favorite game of cat and mouse.

I set my phone back on my stomach opting to focus on the music. My nails drummed against my phone case following the beat of the heavy bass. It felt like an internal clock was ticking, reminding me like an annoying little devil that I was desperate for a response. Minutes turned into a half hour, a half hour turned into  an hour. I gave up on my ability to wait when Lucas banged on my door, loud enough to shake me from half asleep stupor. He was asking me to drive him back to his dorm. I didn’t bother putting my shorts back on. Instead i trudged to the front door in just my panties, sliding on my flipflops as we made our way out to the parking lot. The both of us were yawning as we got into my car, the passenger seat was still all the way back from when he got in three days ago.

“Had fun?” I asked. I could tell he was getting drained. Having sex non stop was going to run him right into the ground. He and Quinn were always hot messes like that. And I got called the stuck up one because my relationships were slightly more calculated.

“Yeah…” He grumbled.

“How many you'd get out?”

“2...Quinn got 5.”

“Oh boy. Let me guess, you didnt eat since I fed you either, right?” He didn't answer. I sighed and took a right turn away from the dorms and towards the strip of fast food places downtown.

“Where you going?”

“To get you food.” I flicked him in the temple, making him wince. “You need to eat and stop thinking with your dick so much.”

“Yes, Eri.” He sighed as set his head on his open faced palm, staring out the window. I pulled into a Taco Bell, rubbing his knee to pull him out of his sleepy daze. He gave me his order which seemed to be a whole laundry list of calories and fat. I pulled up to the next window and automatically reached for my debit card only to realize that i had left it at the apartment inside my shorts.

“Fuck.” I whispered.

Lucas dug into his pocket and handed me his card from his wallet. I started to protest but he just gave me a small smile. “I owe you. Dont worry about it. Youre always taking care of me anyway.”

I took his card and handed it over to the employee, waiting for his order. I felt his warm hand slip into mine giving it a little squeeze. “Dont start that gay shit.” I joked. He was always so clingy, loving, and sweet and I...liked to suppress everything I could about my emotions. Somehow he always found a way to bring something caring and nurturing out of me. He was so far from home that within the year or so that Quinn and I had known him, we became his family. Sure we all fucked but it just...kinda worked that way. I could be his best friend and caregiver and we could also connect physically to a point where it was neutral. He knew i would never want a relationship with him and that was for the best.

“Dont lie, Eri. Somewhere between your big tits you have a heart and not some black void like you pretend to have.”

“Excuse you, you leave my black void alone. It's fine just the way it is. I'm going to keep it that way.”

“Admit it. In there you have love for me and Quinn. And probably Johnnnyyyyyyyy~”

“Oh, grow up.” I scoffed. “Besides he's the one who wants it more than i do. It was him who sent me the request this afternoon and he’s already sent me a slutty snap.” i replied, grabbing the bag of food from the worker and handing it over to Lucas.

“Ohhh so that’s who that was? Shocker.”

“Yeah, you knew it was him, you little shit.”

“I’m your wingman, babes. You'll thank me later.”

I pulled out of the drive through and headed back in the direction of his dorm building. “I doubt that but ok. I dont even know if i'm gonna fuck him again.”

“You will.” he replied before shoving a burrito in his mouth. I pulled up to the building shortly after, ignoring his little quip and setting myself in park.

“Here we are, kid.”

He swallowed hard, licking his fingers of cheese sauce. “Can i come over next weekend?”

“I'm gonna be busy with Yuta on Saturday so see what Quinn says.”

“Ugh, fine.” He leaned in close and gave me a soft kiss, holding it for a bit longer than usual. “See you around!” He got out the car, taking his bag of food and backpack with him. I waited until i saw him disappear into the building before taking off. My phoned buzzed from within my cup holder and i wondered if it was Johnny. I waited until i came across a red light before stealing a glance at my phone. My mouth went dry as soon i saw his username on my screen. I wanted to see what he had sent so bad but if it was too good i didnt want it to happen while i was in the car and distracted.

I zoomed down the street, my foot a little bit heavier on the gas pedal than necessary. I was home in a flash, almost drifting into a parking space before taking the steps to my apartment two at a time. I unlocked the door and rushed in, surprised to see Quinn hobbling out of their room.

“Now i know how you feel with Johnny. My thighs are killing me.”

“Speaking of Johnny.” I spat out excitedly. “He added me on snapchat and his last snap to me was him in sweatpants with his dick print all perfect and his abs out and shit. I wanted to die. And now he just sent me another one and since you’re done with Lucas you can see it.”.

“God i hope it's his dick. Will you let me see his dick? I want to see his dick.”

I shrugged and clicked on his notification. “i guess we'll see- holy fucking shit.”

I could barely see his face, only his lips curling into a smirk as his monstrous hand groped at his bulge, giving it a quick shake. God it was so gross yet here i was salivating over it. His caption was ‘thought about how good you felt’. The 10 second clip was gone almost instantly but the view was already ingrained in my mind.

“Well if youre not gonna go over there and fuck him i will.” Quinn said.

“I’d rather you kinda….didn't.” I  looked down at them as a little bit of awkwardness sparked between us.

They pouted and crossed their arms. “You're gonna hog all that to yourself?! That's so unfair!”

“Ok, i know were pretty open about who we fuck because were in the same social circle but we kinda share Yuta and Lucas already! And i'm pretty sure Taeyong is up my ass again too, so that’s three guys! Let me have this ONE.”

“Ugh!! You’re getting soft! Was his dick that good that it went straight to your head and made you loopy?! We’re supposed to use them and leave! That’s it.”

“I know! I mean i usually leave right after when I’m with Ten and Yuta, i dropped Taeyong entirely, and Lucas hangs around here constantly so i can’t do much about that. You're the one that usually kicks him out. I dont know...i just…”

“You like him?!”

“I do not! I just like his dick! And maybe his lips….and his eyes...and his arms. And his tummy is cute too. His butt looks suuuuper good and-”

“You're weak, Eri. Promise me you will only use him for his dick. He's a dumb fuckboy who doesn’t deserve you.” Quinn said.

“I know that! And it’s gonna stay that way. Trust me. I'm not even going to answer him back. I’m tired so i’m heading to bed. I’ve got an early class anyway.”

“Yeah you do that. Between Jae, Taeyong, and Lucas, i’m pooped. I'm gonna stay home tomorrow.”

I rolled my eyes. Sometimes their will to not do anything successful with college was irritating. “Ok well you do that. Just be quiet if you're going to stay up late.” i said as i disappeared into my room and curled up in bed. What i said was partially true; i wasn't going to answer Johnny back. Well not now at least. He made me wait an hour before answering me. I was petty enough to make him wait twice as long for my response. I decided to set a timer as a reminder to get up and take a cute pic of my ass. But first a quick nap would do me good.

--

My alarm shook me out of my sleep, the heavy guitar riff scaring the crap out of me. I felt around for my phone groaning as i lifted my head off my pillow to shut it off. I blinked a few times bringing the time into view. It was 7:30 am. I totally missed my timer to respond back to Johnny and i didn't have time to take something sexy now. There were no other notifications from him either. I only had a few texts from my harem and a good morning selfie from Lucas. Glad he was actually going to class at least.

I forced myself out of bed and started getting ready. Shower, brushing my teeth, getting makeup on my face so i looked semi alive and like i didnt want to throw myself out a window. I picked out a random pair of leggings and a cut up band tee. That would suffice for today. I pulled on my worn out converses and grabbed my backpack, stuffing my headphones and laptop in it. I put some deodorant on and tossed it in my bag as well. I still had a decent amount of time to get to the commuters parking lot and head to the dungeon of journalism buildings. Once i got there, it only took a few minutes to find my classroom. It was a tiny box of a room with barely any air conditioning and older wooden desks. I plopped down in the middle aisle, already feeling my thighs stick to the chair.

Waiting for class to start was a pain. I was hungry and wanted coffee. I would maybe have some time to go to the Starbucks downtown before my next class. I didnt really have Starbucks money to spare but i needed a pick me up. Other students started shuffling in as the 9 o’ clock mark crept closer. Our professor still hadn’t shown up yet. The general consensus was 10 minutes without a teacher and you were free to leave. Please let me leave, i begged silently. If I didn’t cave in and get Starbucks I could sleep in a bit more in one of the quiet rooms in the library. I had some heavy decisions to weigh out within the next five minutes before I was able to book it.

I was watching the time tick on my phone when i saw a notification from snapchat. Oh fuck…It was Johnny. I opened it quickly, covering my phone just in case it was some sort of morning wood pic. I started wondering, just for a moment, if he slept in those sweats or completely naked. When i looked down at the picture it was actually of me sitting at my desk. The caption was ‘Ur not even gonna say hi? Lol’. I straightened up and whipped my head around trying to see where the fuck he was. I saw his smirk from the back right corner of the room, sunglasses over his eyes as he gave me a little head nod and stuck his tongue out. I whipped back around in my seat, trying to hide the blush that splattered across my cheeks.

Of course he would have class with me. Of fucking course. I had no idea what to do. Would this be awkward for us if we kept fucking? I could just ignore him for the entire semester. Pretend that any emotion towards him didn't exist and that we hadn’t fucked. While i was building my exterior facade into a sturdy wall my interior was crumbling with panic. I started furiously texting Quinn, even though i knew they weren't awake, just to get my internal screaming out. How was i supposed to get away from him now?! I had to look at those stupid gorgeous lips and thick thighs every single day of fall semester! All i could do was pray that the professor still didn't show up. My foot was furiously bouncing in anticipation of my freedom and potential to leave Johnny in the dust.

Unfortunately, i didn't get my wish. The professor came in then, huffing, puffing, and way too flustered. I set my head on the table and groaned, barely ready to suffer through the next hour and a half. Every once in awhile it would feel like Johnny was watching me but each time i looked back i was sure he was sleeping behind his sunglasses. He was probably up partying too late last night again. i caught him rubbing his eyes and yawning, looking so soft and sleepy. My lips tugged into a smile, that gooey, sickly sweet feeling returning to my stomach. I needed that to stop. I sighed and looked down at the syllabus that had been passed out. No one actually gave a crap about these. We just needed to know the due dates and what stupid projects we had. Time droned on but luckily we were let out a little early.

I stood up quickly, grabbing my bag and heading straight for the door, not bothering to look back to see if Johnny was on my tail. I got my answer either way when i felt an arm around my shoulders steering me towards the rows of rentable lockers. “So you are definitely ignoring me, right?” I heard him ask.

I groaned internally. “Not necessarily. I mean i couldn't just get up in the middle of class and ride your dick.” I kept myself in front of him, shuffling my weight from one foot to the other and gripping the strap of my backpack tightly.

“Definitely would have been better then going through another fucking syllabus. Like we dont know how to read.” He rolled his eyes. “Anyway, when’s your next class?”

“Why?” I asked curiously.

He looked around for a second before leaning against the lockers. “Wanna hook up again? I need a quickie.”

I couldn't help the giggle that escaped me. “Oh you need one, huh? Damn, didn't think you'd be the needy type Johnny.”

He sucked his teeth and rolled his eyes. “Let me put it this way then. I want to fuck and you’re the only one that’s here right now. Hows that sound?”

“Sounds like you're still thirsty from when I didn't answer your snap last night.”

“Don't know why you're playing hard to get when you weren’t that hard to get in my bed on Saturday.”

“And you definitely aren't hard to wrap around my finger.” I shot back, glaring at him as our bodies edged closer to each other.

“I’m hardly wrapped around your finger.” His almost hissed as he leaned in.

“You're here wanting to fuck me again, aren't you?” I crossed my arms and smirked up at him, knowing I had bested him in his little shade contest.

He dragged his tongue over his teeth and scoffed.  He looked away for a second, probably trying to recoup his ego. “Look, you want it or nah? I don’t have time to waste”

I got my phone out of my bra and flicked on the screen, pretending to see if I had enough time for him. My next class still wasn’t for another hour and a half. I could squeeze in a quickie. Besides if this perked me up then I could save a few bucks on coffee. I let out an exaggerated sigh. “I guess I have some free time. You got a condom?”

He patted his shorts, grabbing his wallet from his back pocket before flipping it open and checking the money pocket. “Yep.”

“I’m not about to fuck you with some old ass condom you’ve had in your wallet since you were like 16.”

“I just put it in there the other day, stupid. Anyway, where you wanna go?”

“Third floor has private bathroom. Normally that floor is pretty empty until later on in the afternoon. Follow me.”

I slipped in front of him, trying my best to make sure he had a view of my ass in the leggings that left little to the imagination. Besides if I lead the way I wouldn’t have to struggle as much to keep up with his long strides. We maneuvered up the stairs, flowing around the clog of students shifting classes. When we got to the third floor it was mostly clear as I had expected but I still looked around to see if anyone would possibly notice us. Johnny didn’t care, however. He sprinted ahead of me, swinging the door open the to single stall. “Come on already. No one’s gonna see.”

I sighed and scurried over to him, bouncing into the room and rushing him to close the door. He rolled his eyes as he set his backpack down and locked the door. “What? You think we’re gonna get in trouble out something? A bathroom isn’t the same as the student affairs office.”

“Shut up, asshole. I just want to be sure no one is going to interrupt us is all. I don’t have time to hear you whining about blue balls or some shit.”

“Whatever, scaredy cat. Let’s get this over with.” He pulled his shirt over his head and tossed it by his backpack.

“Let’s get this over with? You know I can just leave you here to jerk off if that’s how you’re gonna be.”

“Yeah but you wont.” He grabbed the strap of my backpack and forced me close to him, my head almost ramming into his chest. I braced myself against him, about to bombard him with profanities when his hands cupped either side of my face. His head came down to connect our lips and I melted then, hungry to satisfy my addiction that already developed for his sensual kisses. I clung to his waist tight as we melded together. His tongue slipped out to massage my own, sucking it into his mouth to control every aspect of our tangle. He retreated his hands from my face and worked to shove my backpack off and drop it beside us. I had begun to claw at the waistband of his shorts while he grabbed a hold of my hair. His other hand rested on the small of my back, making sure i was crushed against him. My breath was barely able to escape with how close we were and his lips not breaking from mine. I managed to pop open the button of his fly while he moved us backwards, trapping me between his well built frame and the bathroom wall. I pulled away finally, gulping down air that he threatened to take away again.

“You like shoving me against shit, don’t you?” i panted heavily.

He licked his lips, lowering himself even more to kiss at my neck. “I like having you exactly where i want you. Plus, it's hot to see you stand on your tiptoes just to try and kiss me.”

“I'm pretty sure you just like me being short because my mouth is closer to your dick.”

“I mean that too.” He chuckled lowly before wrapping his lips around my collarbone to draw blood to the surface. “We can test that out if you want.”

“If i'm good at giving head?”

He small groan against my shoulder. “Yeah. That.”

“Well…” I grabbed onto his shoulders and shoved him back, switching our positions to have him pinned to the wall. “I haven't had any complaints yet.” Johnny looked a little surprised, yet excited at the prospect of me sucking him off. His eyes were fixated on me, on my lips, as i trailed passionate kisses down his stomach and nipped at his iliac's crest. In a split second, his shorts were around his ankles and my knees followed them to the ground. I was mostly confident in my ability to pleasure him until a sickening feeling started bubbling in my mind. How the hell he was even remotely going to fit into my mouth? I could barely take him inside me without minutes on end of preparation. Now he expected me to shove him down my throat? I swallowed hard when the outline of his dick trapped in his boxer briefs stared me down.

“You just gonna sit there or-?” he snapped.

I realized he had been waiting for me to start. My heart was thundering already as I tried to conceive of a way to swallow him down comfortably. I sighed internally and just decided to bite the bullet. I rested my hands on his hips kissing the outline of his cock through his underwear. His breath stilled as his eyes closed and his head dipped back ever so slightly. I kissed the head of his cock, sucking gently and tonguing around the thickness. My hands wandered from his hips to his ass, grabbing a hold of his firm cheeks. I heard him let out a small laugh before pulling my hands away, making me pout.

“What's up with you girls and my ass? Ya”ll are always grabbing it.” he said.

“Not for nothing but it’s pretty cute and if you want me to enjoy sucking your dick even more, you should probably let me do it.” I yanked my hands from his and pulled down his underwear swiftly, revealing what made me scared yet lustful. He was rolling his eyes, preparing to retort with another quip when i wrapped my lips fully around his head. He exhaled softly instead, making the easiest of thrusts into my mouth as he started getting hard. My mouth was expanding to accommodate being fuller and I tried swallowing around him, inching my way down gradually. My eyes were already squeezed shut, my chest heaving as i forced myself to breathe through my nose.

The groan that came out of him was definitely a bit louder and deeper than what i heard during our last hookup. It was followed by a much softer ‘keep going’ as his long fingers came to rest on my shoulder. His thumb stroked my jugular, keeping me steady against him. My body relaxed a bit more as i felt the warmth of his hand so close to my neck. I was leaning into him again, wanting to feel the constriction of my air supply. I was able to swallow down more, barely half way but better than what i expected. I worked a hand around his base, giving a small squeeze before starting rhythmic strokes. My fingers met my lips as I flowed between sucking and stroking, trying my best to coax those rumbly groans out of him once more.

His thumb finally pressed into the front of my throat and I could feel the pressure every time i swallowed back. My grip on his ass tightened my nails digging into the muscles and leaving small marks behind. I wrapped a small moan around the tip of his cock as I felt the beginning drops of precum coat my taste buds. He hissed softly as he slipped the condom from his pocket into my hand. “Hurry…”

I smirked, releasing him from my mouth and tearing the foil open. “Still so needy, Johnny~”

He turned his eyes away from me. “Just hurry up and make me cum.”

“Hah, funny. I'm the one who should be cumming before you, asshole.”

“If you earn it.” He guided my hand towards his dick, commanding me to roll the condom on. 

I scoffed, pinching the tip of the rubber as i rolled it down his shaft. “If I earn it? You’re seriously bad at trying to be the one in charge.” I lied. His sharp tongued quips and deep tone was sending shivers down my spine. I wanted him to control me, command me, and have me fight tooth and nail against him.

Johnny grabbed me by my arms, hauling me up to my feet and harshly pulling down my leggings. I couldnt even say anymore before his fingers were down my panties. His middle finger was coyly circling my entrance and I knew he was just trying proving his point. Specifically, when his finger made one slow drag up to my clit before sliding back down again. “You were saying?”

I rolled my eyes, crossing my arms over my chest. “Instead of annoying me with your smart ass mouth and your boring repeated tricks, why don’t you repay the favor by eating me out?”

He looked down at me, wrinkling his nose in a face of disgust. “Nah, i'm cool.”

Excuse me?? What? Did he really just deny eating me out? What kind of nonsense was that?!

“Why not? I literally just sucked your dick. It's the least you could do.” i almost growled. I would have much rather had him go down on me and not be such a jerk about it. Maybe i was spoiled. Every single one of my other partners would do it for me, from Taeyong to Quinn to Lucas and everyone in between. Johnny was the worst exception and my mind still toyed with the idea of leaving him here to get off on his own. I felt his finger dip into me again, trying to distract me from my tirade of angry thoughts. I hated him for all the convincing he was doing by filling me with his thick long fingers, furling and unfurling at a pace that made me squirm against him. My anger was slowly dissolving and my hips were grinding into his palm with each thrust. His breath brushed against my ear while his other hand tugged on the hem of my tee.

“Off, now.” He purred against me.

His command was better and more convincing this time. The timbre of his voice made my thighs clench just a bit and brought out the worst in my bratty personality. “Make me.”

I didn’t expect him to laugh in my face. “What are you, twelve? Just take it off.”

“Shut up! You're the one trying to command me and shit!.”

“I thought that's what you liked? Or is that only when you're tied up with your legs open?” He pulled his fingers out of me, my juices glistening under the fluorescent lighting. I stared at them, my tongue coming to drag over my bottom lip as tension filled the minimal space between us. I swallowed back when i saw the way he was looking at me, irritated yet primal in a way. He gave another tug on my shirt and i didnt question it this time. I pulled it over my head, along with my bra, and dropped it to the floor, never taking my eyes off him as he gripped my chin and pushed his cum covered fingers passed my lips.

The way he filled my mouth so easily had me clawing at his waist to keep him against me. My tongue worked over each digit, sucking my taste off before forcing myself down to his knuckles. His brows furrowed as he watched, concentrating on every movement and the way I grabbed at his wrist as if I was pleading to never pull away. I did however manage to regain myself enough to send a taunting question his way. “Remember when you said you were going to finger me so hard you would have me cumming in minutes? That didn't happen last time. Gonna make up for your lie?”

“i wasn’t lying but since you want to test me so bad bend over the fucking sick then, smartass.”

He shoved me towards the sink so fast that I struggled to kick off my converses and leggings so i wouldn't trip. I grabbed onto the sides of the sink, glaring back at Johnny through the mirror that was bolted above it. “You don't have to push me.”

“Aw baby,” he cooed as he lifted my knee onto the edge of the sink. “Dont lie, i know you love this. I’m gonna make you cum all over my cock.”

“Pause. Big pause. Don’t ever, and i mean, EVER say that. It's gross and literally the most unsexy thing someone could ever say.”

He shrugged, his voice dropping in tonality. “Usually girls want me to say shit like that.”

“Get it through your thick skull that i’m not one of your little chickenheads. What works for them doesn't do shit for me. Just...be yourself.” I sighed as I squared my shoulders and looked back at him. “Ok?” I said softly.

He licked his lips and cleared his throat. “What fucking ever.” He was back to his cocky attitude then but for a split second i could see a small shift in his eyes. Maybe it was doubt or him softening up a bit through me calling him out. I hoped it got through to him or else i'd have to use one of Ten’s ball gags every time i was with him.

He resumed his impatient plunges, as if nothing had transpired, discarding whatever feelings that were passing through his thoughts. He pressed his chest into my back, forcing me to stay bent over the small bowl. The pressure of his body against mine continued to build up and overwhelm my endorphins. I braced my hand against the mirror, the heat from it fogging into a print. God, he was such an asshole for making me feel this good.

He gathered my hair in his fist, tugging slightly to angle my head towards the mirror so i could see the smirk on his reflection.“You know i think i like it better when you don't talk either.”

I gave him a spiteful glare as our eyes chased one another before his tongue dove to place lavish licks across my throat. My shoulders tensed at the sensation, fighting to give into carnal desires that seemed to flare up whenever I was with him.

He placed more bites between my shoulder blades mixing them with the still fresh marks from our previous escapade. He joined his destruction of my skin's surface with the curling of his fingers again, pressing the pads of his fingertips against the sensitive area within me. My lips clasped into a impenetrable wall, sealing in my moan while his were flowing freely into my shoulders. I felt his cock burying into my back, the friction of my squirming leading him into torment. My supporting leg seemed to lift up on its own, bringing me to my tip toes, making him get as deep as he could. The torture ceased when i finally gave into his claim, my first orgasm shocking me as it had in fact hit me in minutes. I almost believed i could snap the sink in half with how utterly amazing his fingers were.

My head dipped low as i sank back, trying to recover before he worked me up again. I wanted to rest my propped up leg down on the ground but Johnny kept it pinned in place. He didnt let me have a moment to myself. Instead he vanished inside me so breathtakingly fast that my gasp surrounded us in echoes. His hand forced an iron grip on my hip while his muscles worked to piston into me. I leaned back against his shoulder reminding me of the climax of our first fuck. My eyes were fluttered closed, lips parted and waiting to feel his tongue overrunning mine. The small teasing nibbles to my lips that turned into rumbling bites were enough to make me weak.

Mewls, curses, and begs circulated between us Then it was over. He pulled away without an explanation, a pattern he was performing all too familiarly. He busied himself with kicking off his shoes and stumbling out of his shorts. I knew he hadnt cum yet and i need that deep stretch between my thighs and that radio voice to make me drip. I crossed my arms over my chest, waiting for his next move. “Well?”

He showed nothing more than calculated movements to pull me up into his arms, keeping me between his chest and the wall anew. There wasn’t any struggle to lift me, not even so much as a grunt when the muscles in his arms flexed to support my legs and my ass. I watched every inch of him tense; his legs square and steady, his chest rising and falling with each heavy inhale, and his shoulder blades pinching inwards. He was literally beautiful and i despised it. He was making my brain feel as if it was stuck in the clouds and was never going to clear itself of the fog.  He had spread me out for him, my legs dangling over his striated forearms,

I felt him then, his shaft riding between my lower lips to coat himself in my wetness. It was opposite of the rushed thrusts he had moments ago that made my stomach burn. The ridge of his head ghosted across my clit with each upward motion reminding me that the simplistic move was enough to bring me closer to insanity. That sensation was my favorite thing in the world and i ached for more. I held onto his shoulders, stabilizing myself as i inched my hips to meet his in an unwavering continuation of my satisfaction. His eyes flickered down at me, that smug look mocking me. Why did he know how to tease me so well?

I wanted to shove his face away from me but instead i dipped a hand down from his shoulder, my nails scraping against his torso. His eyes followed my fingers, getting wide as he found them spreading myself open for him. I could see his adam's apple bob with a hard swallow. “Fuck...” He shuddered. I felt my back slide down the wall as his hold on me wavered for a second. He hiked me up, repositioning me as he got a hold of himself. He was at a better angle now and the tip of his cock was already pushing past my entrance. I rested my head against the wall trying to distract myself from the way my already sore thighs were shaking and instead concentrate on the returning thrusts.

The slow sweet feeling got my body on edge just as much as the fast pace plowing did. I could feel myself tingling, shuddering each time his head caught a sensitive spot within my walls. Johnny dripped kisses across my breasts as his tongue teased tantric circles around my nipple before capturing it between his plush lips. My back arched, my breast filling his mouth enough for him to bite the swell of it. My breath hiccuped as i felt the sting of his teeth grazing against my skin. I wanted to see the after effects of those perfect rows when i thought of him later on tonight. He kissed at the indentations, creeping his way back up to my neck. 

His motions switched to a rough slam that had his hips forcing me back against the clammy wall as i clutched onto him for dear life. The calculated and harsh thrusts were powerful enough to drive feelings out of me that i preferred to keep repressed. It didn't help at all when his husky fervored radio voice finally groaned in my ear, “Fuck, Eri….you feel so good.”

In my head i was begging him not to stop though all i could get out was little squeaks as my nails etched streaks into his back. He hissed as i clenched around him with as much strength as i could muster, spurring the morphing jagged stutters of his hips faster. Our lips met in a rougher kiss once more, teeth clashing and moans interrupting each grab of our tongues. He was stretching me as he throbbed until the ever euphoric feeling flushed over us together. Our bodies had somehow managed to sync our orgasms which shocked me into silence. Johnny pressed his forehead into my shoulder as he slowed down, riding out the last aching feeling between us. I was tingling all over, my limbs feeling like tv static, as a wave of warmth washed over my skin. Everything about this was a mystery I had to unravel. It was new and different. I had never cum at the same time as my partner before. I always thought it was an enigma that only appeared in movies and tv shows. Now that I was experiencing it I had no idea what to do or say. I looked up at him as i tried to gather myself.

“Shit...uh…” What did you say to someone who made you feel so painstakingly good?

He pulled out of me gently before setting me down on my unstable legs. I diverted my eyes from him and managed to catch my reflection in the mirror. New hickies were all over me flowing with the others and the teeth marks on my chest made the skin tender. The fatigue was setting in hard and i was harshly reminded of the warm September weather that the shitty air conditioning in this building couldn't keep up with. I wanted to shower then sleep forever, maybe with him in my bed.

That minuscule daydream ended as i saw him tossing out the used condom and getting dressed. He was cold and distant like i usually was after a quick fuck..

“See ya.” He said as he pulled his shirt back over his head and grabbed his backpack. I gave him the finger as the door shut behind him, cursing under my breath. I was pretending that it wasn’t phasing me that he was leaving me out in the cold again. I turned on the faucet and ran some water over my neck and chest, trying to cool myself down. I pulled my hair up into a ponytail before wiping the cum that was now making me uncomfortably wet from between my thighs. Getting dressed was a painful ride that i was sure to carry onto my shift at work later on. I took a deep breath before opening the door and sliding back out into the world, less horny but still feeling incredibly reckless.

--

Johnnys POV

I unlocked the door to the apartment, sighing deeply as i still felt the scratches from earlier beneath my backpack. They had bothered me all day during my shift and I had half a mind to curse Eri out. I dropped my backpack to the floor, grateful to get rid of the weight and kicked off my work boots. I ran my fingers through my hair as i took off my hat, setting it on the hook by the door along with my keys. Jae was sprawled out on the couch seeming to have done nothing all day. “Hey dipshit.”

“‘Sup, asshole.” he replied.

“I’m fucking starving.” I announced as i headed over to the kitchen. I opened the freezer and took out the frozen pizza i had been thinking about all day. I had barely eaten since i had started my shift this afternoon and at this point i would eat everything if our fridge wasn’t so empty.

“Hey i got you something.” I heard Jae call out as i tore open the box and pulled out the pizza.

“What?”

“Look.”

I turned back to see a little plastic baggie dangling from his fingers. I rushed back to him snatching it up. “Fuck! Where'd you get this from? Matt?”

“Yeah, i managed to have enough for the good shit.”

“Thank fuckin' god because Josh kept giving us mostly stems.” I replied. “I'm gonna put some food in the oven in a sec, if you wanna share.”

He nodded. “What are you making?”

“Pizza, i dont think we have another one but ill double check. Oh, we need screens.” I headed into my room for a moment, grabbing my bowl off my dresser and searching for the screens i had….somewhere. I opened my drawer and moved some of my underwear around, searching for the stupid little envelope. “For the love of tits, where is it? JAE! You got any screens left?”

“Fuck if i know.” he called back.

Thanks for helping, asshole. I went to check my desk drawer, pushing aside some of my sd cards, lighters, and notebooks until I finally found the tiny manilla envelope with the mesh screens for the bottom of my bowl. I went back to the living room and handed them over to Jae. “You wanna get it ready? Im gonna put the pizza in.”

He sat up and grabbed his grinder that was on the coffee table. “Yep. Can we use your good lighter? Mine barely has any juice left.”

We always use my good lighter. I rolled my eyes and tried to hide my annoyed sigh. I couldn't be too picky. He did get me good weed after all. “Yeah, no problem, bro.” I left him to work and shuffled back to the kitchen, getting out a cookie sheet and slapping the pizza on it, sans plastic. I looked in the freezer to see if we had anything else I could whip up. There was some left over frozen fries and onion rings. I shrugged and dumped them onto the cookie sheet, shoving the pizza aside a bit. That was good enough. I tossed it in the oven and set the timer for like 20 minutes.

I sat down beside Jae on the couch just as he was lighting the bowl, taking in a big inhale before handing it to me. I did the same, waiting a bit before exhaling, my eyes resting on the rerun of Rick and Morty he had put on. I thought about telling him what happened between Eri and I this afternoon. We normally told each other about who we fucked but i felt like i wasn't going to hear the end of his bitching if I did. Oh well. I had a mental shrug before taking another hit. “So….i fucked Eri again today.”

“Damn, for real?” He looked over at me in disbelief, shaking his head a bit. “I knew you were whipped for her.”

“Fuck off, i am not. She’s just you know…hot.” As in ridiculously cute even though she was not the usual type i went for. “And she has nice tits.” As in they fit so perfectly in my hands and i wish i could hold them all day, that i could hold her all day… “And shes tight as fuck, to be honest.” As in, i could hardly give a shit about that but she feels so damn good that my mind just turns to mush when im inside her. “Oh, and shes good at giving brain.” As in, her lips are literally a gift to this damn world and all i could think about was kissing them...but also yeah, she gives good brain too.

“Damn, her pussy must be that special to end your one night stand streak then. What happened to ‘only get her snap or instagram so she cant call you’, or ‘only ask for nudes’, or ‘fuck her and leave and dont ever text her back’?”

“The dick wants what the dick wants, bro.” I said before taking another hit. I really wished she would get out my head. I was stuck with her though. For an entire semester i had to stare at the way she twirled her hair around her finger as she tried to look back at me and hope that i didnt notice. I noticed it all and it only made it worse. Everything about her was frozen in my head like a damaged vhs tape caught in the same scene. Even at work i was fucking up coffee orders because i would remember the little moans she made in my ear or some other gay shit. Sometimes i would think about tracing my fingers over her tattoos and seeing what other things turned her on. I hated this. I needed to separate myself from her. Sleeping with her again was a mistake.

“You good or are you just spacing out from the weed?” Jae laughed.

I blinked quickly and looked at him, suddenly coming out of my funk. I had no idea how long I spaced out for or however many hits i took. It was kind of an unconscious motion at this point. I laughed nervously trying to cover up that i had been thinking about Eri. “Oh yeah, haha. Shit's good. I'm gonna check on the food ok?”

“I think the timer went off.” He shrugged as he packed another bowl. I went to check the food, taking my phone with me. I was secretly hoping that i would have a snap from Eri. There was nothing. I should've been happy because it meant i could cut ties and not have her in my room again (or bathroom for that matter). But a feeling in my stomach kept tugging. It was if my gut was telling me to just take the chance and message her again. We barely talked otherwise. Even today i just left her in the bathroom because it was what i was used to even though I felt like I should’ve said more. That orgasm was fuckin’ insane-better than anything I had ever had before. Maybe one more little hook up wouldn’t kill me. No. I was starting to break my own rules.

I wanted to slam my head against the wall with all this back and forth bullshit in my mind. I needed to smoke more; until my head got foggy, my eyes blurry, and i could laugh this feeling away. I opened the oven and stared at the food for awhile, trying to gauge if everything was cooked without actually touching it. I cocked my head to the side, watching the slow bubbling of the pizza cheese and listening to the sizzle of the fries that were just starting to crisp.

“Is it done?!”

I stepped back from the oven, wiping away the sweat on my forehead that had started to accumulate from being in front of the heat for so long. I looked around for a potholder, finding it on the floor because Jae could never pick anything up. I pulled the tray out and grabbed a plate for myself. “Come get your own shit!”

I grabbed a knife and started hacking away at the pizza, trying to get it into slices. I was so focused on trying to unstick it from the tray i almost didnt notice the two quick vibrations that went off as my phone screen flashed on. I tried not to look at it right away since Jae was making his way over to the kitchen. If i didn’t play it cool he would go back to bitchin’ about me hooking up with Eri again. He started picking off fries from the tray, opening and closing his mouth to try in get cold air in, instead of waiting for it to cool like a normal human being. Meanwhile, I managed to get half a slice of pizza unstuck and dropped it onto my plate before joining it with some onion rings. I picked up my phone, making sure Jae was too engrossed with eating to see what Eri had sent me.

It was a picture of her neck and shoulders. The new hickies from today that had amassed into a weird purple splotch on her skin. Her caption was ‘can you not? I do have to go to work you know lol’. I smirked. Seeing them all over her made me feel something. Like i had marked my territory? Eww no. That sounded gross. Maybe i liked seeing a reminder of me on her? It was feeding into my thoughts of ‘maybe she was thinking about me too’. My thumbs hovered over my keyboard for a solid minute. I didnt want to sound like an idiot or worse, a desperate idiot.

Text me when ur free?

I hit send in the chat section then typed out my number. I never did that. Never fucking ever. I was kicking myself mentally already. She wasn’t going to text back. I set my phone in my pocket and pulled off more pizza from the tray and went to the couch, alternating between eating, smoking, and feeling my body start to give into sleep. “Dont sleep on the couch.” I yawned at Jae, seeing him start to slump over on the armrest.

“I’m chill. I had a productive day of not giving a fuck and staying home. Go snap your girlfriend.” he laughed.

“Go text yours.” I got up and shuffled to my room, slamming the door behind me. I tossed my phone onto my bed and took off all my clothes, kicking them towards the giant pile of laundry on my floor. I shook off a condom wrapper that stuck to my foot then fell face first into the mattress. My body felt heavy. I hoped i would stay asleep through the night this time and wake up not needing 4 Americanos to start the day. I felt a vibration through my bed and poked my head up from my pillow.

I guess im free

Dumbass

I immediately saved her number.

Cool

Slut

I could feel a smile start to form on my lips and i shoved my face back into my pillow. If i suffocated myself enough i’d end my misery. I wouldn't need to wait for my heart stop beating so fast if i was dead. Minutes passed by and there wasn’t another message. I waited just a bit longer, until my eyelids felt heavy and i dove deep into the void.

The void was sometimes peaceful but it never really lasted long. There were times where it shifted into an ocean and made me choke on the waters of my mental distress. Other times it was a sterile room, bright and menacing. It housed my body on a slab that couldn't move, my mouth wired shut and my inability to scream permeating my mind until all i did was panic. The worst of times it was a monster that sucked me back into a realm of corrupted childhood innocence and i could never escape the horrors of being chased. It felt so stupid that i could do all this to myself but never had a way to stop it. The fear was overwhelming, creeping through each nerve until all that was left was the suffocating silence and the streaks of tears on my cheeks that smothered me in emotions that were usually locked away and buried under time and ignorance. I was fading into a forgotten mess and still trying to claw my way up, reaching for absolutely anything that could pull me out.

“Hello?....Johnny?”

I gasped as my body yanked upright. My room was stuffy and heated. My sheets stuck to my sweat drenched body, clinging like a second skin. I looked down at my hands that were slowly coming into view as i blinked away tears.

“Johnny???”

I looked around in the darkness of my room. I had no idea where that voice was coming from. Was i just imagining things? Was i even actually awake? I spotted my phone, the screen glowing as it showed an ongoing call to Eri. I picked it up, trying to even out my breath. “H-hello?”

“Dude, its like 4am. Why are you calling me?” she sounded groggy and irritated.

“So-sorry. I uh...i think i might've rolled over onto my phone and dialed you. Didn't mean to wake you.”

“You sound out of breath. Did you call me while you're fucking someone?!”

“No...seriously i’m not. I-i-i gotta go.” I hung up instantly, not wanting to dwell in my weakness. I didn't need her to know about my suffocating anxiety forced night terrors. I didn't need anyone to know about those. I wasn't sure if i rolled over onto my phone or picked it up and dialed her in my sleep. I assumed i had done it more so on accident. Who knows how much thrashing i did this time. I laid back down, kicking off the sticky blankets and instead focusing on the dozens of messages i had missed in the group chat since i had fallen asleep.

--

The Boys Group Chat

Jae: the king has been bested lol

Taeyong: ohhh shit what happened now?

Jae: the one night stand turned into another fuck

Ten: wait he fucked eri again????

Jae: 😂😂😂😂😂😂

Jae: yup

Ten: holy shit

Taeyong: holy shit is right

Taeyong: thats like...

Taeyong: i mean hes never done that

Jae: not since we became friends

Jae: its been like 2 yrs since we met too

Ten: oh how the mighty have fallen

Johnny: can yall not???

Johnny: like i can literally read everything youre sending

Johnny: i havent fallen anywhere

Ten: hell yeah you have. Youre literally trapped now

Johnny: im not fucking trapped. Its done and over with. Were not gonna fuck again

Yuta: ok bro whatever u say tbh

Johnny: get out of here yuta

Yuta: 👅👅👅👅👅👅

Taeyong: dont listen to them. Ten and yuta drool over her every time she comes near them. Theyre like addicted or something

Taeil: ive seen you commenting a few times on her ig ty. Seems like theyre not the only ones addicted

Taeyong: ive literally just liked a few of her posts! So fucking what? That doesnt mean anything!

Taeil: you were literally staring at her at the party

Taeyong: yeah because you were trying to do your innocent boy schtick!

Ten: ty no matter how much you want to deny it you want her too

Johnny: shes literally not that great. I was just horny today after class. Yall need to chill

Jae: ok but if you hook up with her a third time then we know ur for sure whipped

Johnny: fucking choke. Pls.

Yuta: once you get used to her she aint so bad

Johnny: im cool. Trust.

Ten: hes too vanilla for her lolol

Johnny: fuck off. At least i dont have to like strangle myself to get off

Ten: awww chokings fun j-suh. Im surprised she hasnt asked you to do it yet

Johnny: well i mean like

Johnny: she kinda leaned into my hand a bit

Johnny: on saturday i mean. But it was weird so i just moved it

Ten: lmaooooo pussy

Yuta: dude just do it. She just gets this look in her eyes and its fucking insane

Jae: can yall not right now? Im about to puke

Taeil: im sure shes fine having normal sex. You act like every waking moment with her has to be kinky

Johnny: i havent had any complaints yet either

Taeil: yet? As in youre actually planning for another time? Lol

Johnny: GOOD NIGHT ASSHOLES

ten: #whipped

Yuta: #johnnyiserisbitch

Jae: then what does that make u two?

Yuta: her fuckin doms, dumbass 😂😂😂

Jae: what does that even mean????

Taeyong: even i know what that means jae damn. How dumb are you?

Jae: its just weird! Idk!

Yuta: it means when ten and i fuck her we control everything about her

Taeil: jfc

Ten: its a gift what can i say

(Downloading picture)

Johnny: Yuta are you fucking serious rn bro?

Taeil: Did you really take a picture of her tied up and gagged?

Yuta: lmao yeah. why fckn not? its hot

Johnny: how many pics of her do you have?

Yuta: lol so fucking many

Ten: ive got videos too 😏😏

Yuta: i mean theyre all up for grabs in case you want em 😜

Taeil: dont you think you shouldn't be sending those without her permission?

Yuta: i can dm u them

Taeil: yeah tbh

Taeyoung: youre just as bad as everyone else

Taeil: 🤷‍♂️🤷‍♂️🤷‍♂️

Johnny: cut it out

Ten: boo yall are no fun at all

Yuta: anyway just dont fuck her again or else ull get trapped

Johnny: like you two are?

Ten: guilty tbh

Yuta: mood

Jae: yall need to sleep

Jae: asap

Jae: and stop bugging me

Taeil: mute the damn chat duh

Johnny: i gotta get back to bed too

Johnny: morning shift tomorrow

Taeyong: wack but same

Taeyong: ill see you guys

Ten: nighty nighty tae tae😚😚😚

Jae: ten ur gay is showing. No homo

Ten: literally all the homo. Anyway tell us again if you fuck eri

Ten: and ill let you know what happens on thursday ;)

Johnny: id rather not know and not fuck her again if ur gonna touch her

Taeil: i mean u basically already have so….

Johnny: shut up

Yuta: 😂😂😂😂

Yuta: dumbass

Taeil: im dipping out but ill let you guys know if she comes to the library ✌👅

Jae: eww dont talk about that

Taeyong: stop being such a kid and just go down on her

Johnny: off limits for damn sure

Ten: i'm telling you she wont keep you around if you dont

Johnny: good lets keep it that way

#Johnny Fanfic #JOHNNY SMUT #johnny suh #johnny seo #nct 127 fanfic #johnny nct #nct 127 fanfiction #nct smut #johnny suh smut #johnny seo sm #nct #johnny fanfiction

[malafight]

Long-Ass Life Update (I’m not dead!)

Finally a life update now that I’m back home. It’s been a painful and tiring couple of weeks :’) And actually some of the days/times might be off because I was like super fucking out of it for most of that time period.

Anyhow, I went to the ER on Friday the 1st after 3 days of severe stomach pain, and the local hospital is like notoriously shitty but I was in horrible pain ok

They actually took me seriously for once, took me back immediately, ekg, ultrasound, blood and piss tests, and told me from the start not to eat or drink anything.

They told me they found gallstones and one or more might be stuck in the bile duct, but they made it sound like it wasnt inflamed and there werent many, so I wasnt super worried? They sent me for an MRI and then told me that they didnt have the capability to get out any stones, so they sent my ass an hour away via ambulance to a much better hospital so they could do the probe thing they needed to. It took until Saturday night to get a room there, though, and they didnt know when I’d get there and since they figured theyd want to do the probe ASAP, I was kept completely without eating or drinking for all of Friday night and Saturday, after not eating more than a few bites of muffin on Friday and next to nothing Thursday either because Everything Hurt.

Also, Fentanyl is fucking magic. Thats the only thing that even vaguely touched the pain.

So anyhow, I get to the other hospital at fuck o’clock at night and God Damn Staved because, like I said, bitches gave me No Fucking Food for an entire day (I’m not kidding that hospital is horrible and has a horrible reputation for ending up with killing people or making situations worse but the next nearest hospitals are an hour away in different directions and I don’t often have anyone willing to drive me that far and I often don’t feel up to driving myself that far if I’m already at “need to go to the ER, fuck the money I don’t have” point, and Saer has only just gotten into the USA and the last time they came with me to the ER they ended up with a virus for like three weeks and I wasn’t gonna do that to them again!!) and finally when I got to that hospital they were like “yeah we won’t be able to do the probe until Monday so eat something and then tomorrow you’re on a liquid diet and then nothing by mouth after midnight” so they scrounged me up some chicken broth and orange juice at like ten o’clock at night and gave me Those Good Good Meds and I slept in a decent hospital bed instead of on a fucking ER bed like Friday night (since they were transferring me at the local hospital they didn’t admit me and I slept in the ER. yeah. i hurt too badly to sleep on my side even with pain meds, and I slept on an ER bed. I had to sleep all day Saturday on and off just to get vaguely rested, but honestly? this whole ordeal has been an adventure in sleep deprivation despite heavy sedatives)

Monday rolls around and they take me for the ERCP (iirc thats what it was) where they put a thing down my throat and cut the bile duct wider so the stone could pass, get that bitch cleared up, all is well. I was heavily sedated and remember none of it, just waking up with different pain in my stomach and the world’s worst sore throat.

I was on a liquid diet from that and until the extraction on Wednesday. I have drank my weight in broth and orange juice.

Wednesday they take me in to remove my gallbladder. It was supposed to be a simple laparoscopic procedure, nip it out, pull it, I go home in a couple days with a couple small cuts on my belly. My dad (and several other people) reassured me that it was routine and quick, and is an easy procedure that should take 2 hours at most. I told him, “Listen, with me, literally nothing is ever easy and you know that”

Fast forward to me waking up and my first thought is “is that a catheter? guess it didnt go so easy after all.” I’m pretty sure the first words I said as I woke up were “told you it wouldnt be easy” lmao

Remember how hospital #1 told me that my gallbladder wasn’t inflamed and there were only a couple gallstones?

It was chock goddamn full of gallstones and so inflamed that when they tried to get it out laparoscopically, it tore. He spent an hour trying to get it out that way safely before realizing that his only recourse is to cut me open and get it out that way. The procedure took closer to 5 hours.

I have at least 20 staples in my belly now and I hope I get a cool fuckin scar but shit hurts still. I was in the hospital slowly ramping up to eating solid food again until Friday when I was allowed to go home to Saer. I can’t lift anything more than 20 pounds for another like month, and my range of motion is a fraction of what it was before. I’m so easily exhausted now and i can barely do anything and it’s really fucking pathetic??? and every time I bring that up Saer is like “they TOOK your ORGAN” so

(its really sad that i’m so conditioned that If I’m Not Doing Everything I Can All The Time Then I’m Not Trying Hard Enough that even after having full surgery to remove an organ I’m like NO I CAN DO THE THING and then end up hurting myself s-sobs)

(we watched the episode of b99 today where gina comes back after getting hit by a bus and when she tried to dance while still in the halo saer pointed at her and was like “it u” and i was like “exCUSE” but like, tru)

anyhow, im home, and i have my wife with me, and saer is such a blessing right now because i cannot do SHIT and they need to help me off the couch sometimes if my dumb ass gets in a position with no leverage, and also ive already fallen off the couch like twice because i was like NO I GOT IT and saer was across the room like BEB NO U DONT and yeah im stubborn and stupid ok saer is saving me from myself for the most part

also also the app i drive for is shutting down in my city at the start of december hhhhh so now i also have to fuckin... find a job like this and uGH do not WANT ffff

but yeah thats something even my parents have okayed me holding off on until I’m better so if even my fuckin parents are like “pls chill???” yall know im fucked up

however i’m mostly weaned off opiod pain meds now and am only using them at night when it’s worse and hard to sleep, tylenol tends to take care of it well enough now. my range of motion is improving, too, but i am just still so easily tired that its frustrating. we went grocery shopping yesterday and even in the little motor scooter i was completely worn out by the end of it.

but im alive! all is well! i will continue improving! sorry for being so quiet during this but like I said, i’ve been some level of sedated for most of this event. not fully sedated except for the two procedures, but fentanyl and dilautin (ok i have no idea what it actually is and google isnt helping but i had a button for it) and then morphine and hydrocodone on top of not getting restful sleep At All due to pain, discomfort, and people coming in every hour for vitals checks... I was fuckin Gone i got fuckall done rip

however once my pain-induced blood pressure spike was lowered (i saw them take it at the ER and it was fuckin RED) everyone was like “...you have really good blood pressure??” like i’m pretty sure i have low blood pressure naturally and my size/genetics gives me high blood pressure and they kinda cancel each other out, but yeah. pretty cool.

my family kept swinging between “IF YOURE IN THAT MUCH PAIN FOR 24 HOURS YOU GO TO THE ER. YOU DO NOT WAIT THREE DAYS.” and “...jesus christ you have a high pain tolerance”

//throws the horns thats what chronic pain does to ya baybee

my mom especially was impressed because she was just like “you’re so calm talking to them about how much it hurts how are you doing that” and im just like “its literally wasted energy to freak out and i hurt too badly to move so im just gonna sit here and tell them im a ten and hope they take pity on me because i have no other options”

anyhow fun new experience and im pretty sure ive broken my brother’s hospitalization record and also pretty sure i’ve got enough medical debt on me now that i can literally file for bankruptcy so

also i can feel a void near my ribs and it is so bizarre yall fuckin organs need to close the gap asap bc this shit weird as hell

#life update #drugs tw #body horror tw #surgery

[hoodiehan]

Concert Experience

I’m not sure how to exactly.. section off this entire thing by topic so I’mma just jump in and go for it and say whatever I remember. This is going to be hella long because I have a LOT to say about the entire 2 1/2 hour concert lmao. 

Here’s a link to the setlist for the concert!

I made a setlist of all the songs that were played! Including the songs that were played during the VCRs! But the only song I didn’t include was Mixtape #2 because that was played during a VCR and also none of the mixtapes are on Spotify lmao.

Ah okay okay before the concert STAYs started chanting “STRAY KIDS EVERYWHERE ALL AROUND THE WORLD” then during the ments, the boys started chanting it back to us and we chanted it to them and ;-; yes. Then we also chanted “WE LOVE YOU! WE LOVE YOU!” and I think it took the boys by surprise a little bit, but then they started chanting it back to us and it felt wonderful :’) being apart of that.

YOU GUYS. I’M SO SMALL. AND THE VENUE HAS SEATS. BUT FOR SOME REASON EVERYONE STARTED TO STAND UP AND ;-; I BARELY SEE BC I’M SO SMALL. I HAD TO STAND ON MY TIPPY TOES AND JUMP A LOT TO SEE PROPERLY. MY CALVES HURT BECAUSE OF ALL THE TIPPY TOEING I DID LMAO.  But Chan saw all of us standing and he said “Seeing you guys standing up makes us want to go even harder” and like YES BOY. YES LOL

So I sat in P2. In the Orch R Section (right side of the venue) in row F, so I was also 2 rows away from P1. ;-; But tis okay, ‘tis okay. 

During the ments, the lineup goes: Minho Jisung, Jeongin, Felix, Hyunjin, Seungmin, Changbin and Woojin. From right side of the venue to the left side. Changbin and Woojin were standing right in front of my section and OH MY FREAKING GOSH THEY ARE SO ETHERAL. LIKE WOOJIN. MY MAN. YOU A WHOLE MAN. HE’S SO ASLKJGHASKJLG SURREAL LOOKING LIKE I CAN NOT BELIEVE. AND CHANGBIN. HE’S SO SO SO HANDSOME IN REAL LIFE. AND HE’S SO FREAKING BUFF ? IM SO SHOOK I CAN’T BELIEVE IT. BUT HE ALSO LOOKS SO INTIMIDATING ? AND LIKE IDEK. OKAY PLEASE DON’T TAKE THIS THE WRONG WAY BUT CHANGBIN IS ˢᵉˣʸ. LIKE IM NOT TRYING TO SOUND THIRSTY, GROSS OR ANYTHING BUT HE JUST HAS THIS WHOLE AURA AND VIBE AROUND HIM THAT SAYS “Yeah, I’m here, I know what I’m doing, the effect that I have on you all, and I own this stage” AND THAT CONFIDENCE. IS VERY ATTRACTIVE.  I’ve said this like 20 times lmao but there was a girl sitting 2 rows ahead of me who had a Changbin banner and she would hold it up whenever he looked at us. He saw her banner, waved and smiled to her SO MUCH. PLEASE GET A BANNER FOR A MEMBER STANDING ON YOUR SIDE OF THE STAGE. THEY WILL SEE YOU AND THEY WILL GIVE YOU ATTENTION LIKE I PROMISE YOU. Also he FLIRTED SO MUCH WITH THE FANS. There was one moment where Changbin looked at a fan in the first row and he just gave her this look that was so different idek how to explain it. IT WAS A GOOD LOOK THOUGH. But the girls behind me saw the look he gave her too and said “Oh who was HE lOoKinG AT”. 

Stays cheered so so hard for Changbin! Like I’m so happy that they did too because he deserves it! And every time we cheered for him, he would always kind of smile shyly and ugh adorable. Not to say that we didn’t cheer hard for the other members either. We cheered so loudly and so proudly for everyone! But Changbin was just definitely louder and more energetic. 

Jisung is my bias and he was on the other side of the stage so I didn’t exactly look over at him that often because I was sort of focused on getting Changbin and Woojin’s attention lmao. There was one moment where he came to my side of the stage during Yayaya and I had to stop jumping, screaming, singing and just look at him and realize “Oh my gosh he’s actually real and here”. He’s so absolutely beautiful my heart flutters every time I think about him. Jisung was also wearing a button up shirt with sleeves that were attached with strings. A few of the strings came undone during the concert because he was going so hard on the performances but it was so cute :) 

Here’s a picture of what he was wearing!

SO FREAKING BEAUTIFUL I LOVE HIM. At first his sleeves were rolled down at the beginning of the concert (I think) but then he rolled them up to his elbows halfway into the show and FRICK. THAT’S MY WEAKNESS. BUTTON UPS ROLLED UP THE ELBOWS AHHHH

Then he changed into his sleeveless hoodie/tank top and HOASGKLJASHG HIS ARMS HIS ARMS HIS ARMS HIS ARMS HIS ARMS

YES M Y BOY. FUCK IT UP. GET THOSE GAINS. HAWK YEA LET’S GO.  He’s so BEAUTIFUL. 

Anyways moving on. I took so many pictures I wanted a new wallpaper for my phone (because before it was from the BTS concert from September). My wallpaper is a picture of the boys saying goodbye to everyone, and it’s like perfectly placed because all of my apps are on top and the pictures are clearly seen on the bottom with heavenly yellow lights shining down on them :) Then my lockscreen is a live photo of Hyunjin hugging Jisung and ugh beautiful yet again. Fans did the fan chants during the concert! But it was kind of quiet. bUT WE WENT SO HARD DURING VICTORY SONG, MIROH AND YAYAYA! Like those songs were the most hyped up and it was so fun !! 

Tbh idek what to say for the concert because it went by in such a blur :(  They only had 2 outfit changes during the concert too. But then for the hi touch they changed outfits. They performed a lot of songs back to back and they did it so energetically idek how they do it because I was just standing there singing, and I was already exhausted by the time that My Pace played lmao. 

Ah okay okay. Chan made Seungmin speak SO MANY TIMES LOL. But it’s funny because Chan would say, “I think.....” then he looked around the stage then looks at up Seungmin and says, “SEUNGMIN wants to say something !!” And Seungmin would just go like “Ah” and shake his head but then he would introduce the next song. :) It was super cute.  Chan also talked a lot about “first times” and how precious and memorable they are. He was really excited about this being his first time in LA and about performing in LA for la stays it was so cute :))

Then Hyunjin talked about coming to Disneyland when he was smaller and he said “But because I was so child I can’t remember it” and UWU. BUSTED 10000000 UWUS FOR HIM !!! 

Changbin also spoke so much English ! i’M SO PROUD OF HIM DID I ALREADY SAY THIS? IDEK BUT HE SAID SO MUCH IN ENGLISH AND HE SPOKE SO ELOQUENTLY IT WAS AMAZING !! Woojin, Jeongin and Minho didn’t say as much. But they spoke in Korean and there was a translator. :) Minho tried to speak in English during his ending ment but he forgot what he said. Stays were trying to cheer him on by saying “YOU CAN DO IT!!” But he got shy, and just said “I LOVE STAY”. :)) He’s so adorable I love him.  There was also a person performing sign language for a Stay on my side of the venue too. Chan saw them and took a moment during the concert to say “can we just take a moment and applaud the sign language translator!” Chan is so cute he really notices everything idk he’s adorable HE’S ADORABLE. 

The girl in front of recorded the entire concert and honestly I respect her because my arms got tired of holding up my phone after like 1 chorus lmao. Also the girls behind me screamed so loud I hope that their throats are okay today. I was sitting next to the speaker too, so hearing all the screams in the arena and sitting next to the speaker did not help my hearing at all LOL. My ears were muffled at the end of the entire thing.

Also idk if it’s my hearing being messed up or if it was real life but their voices are so much more high pitched irl? Like Seungmin was so nasally and Jisung was like ᵘᵖ ʰᵉʳᵉ. LOL But during the hi touch, Jisung sounded deeper. Felix sounds the same irl and holy frick I love him. I love him. I love him too.  The boys are absolutely so cute they kept looking at everyone around the entire arena and they kept seeing “I love you Stay!”  Woojin also said during the concert “La is pretty but Stays are more pretty” and AHHH We all went wild HAHAH. During their aegyo part, thEY ALL KEPT ROLLING AROUND THE STAGE AND I WAS LIKE ??? IS THIS ALLOWED ??? HAHAH. Chan said “The name’s Bang... Bang Chan” and aksjlgh THE CROWD WENT WILD FOR THE MAN. Hyunjin had the cutest aegyo though :’) He did a flying heart and caught it and ugh beautiful.

During Get Cool, Changbin changed the lyrics :’). He changed the lyrics from 막내 오다 주웠다 훗 이게 형 클라스죠 (Maknae, oda juwoda hut ige hyung geullaseujyo) to “Stay, I love you!” and gave a finger heart. IT WAS PRECIOUS. Also.. Voices just hits so differently irl. Seungmin’s part in the chorus when he sings “Break free from the voices in my head”  just HITS. SO. DIFFERENTLY. IT’S AMAZING. And when Chan sings “Step out of the voices” is so powerful I can’t even explain. I recorded the part where Changbin and Jisung are doing their duo rap because IT’S SUCH A POWERFUL MOMENT.  Insomnia is... IT ALSO HITS DIFFERENTLY. Something about all the Stays singing “I can’t sleep” with Chan is so emotional idk. But Hyunjin singing in Insomnia UGH BEAUTIFUL. THE ENTIRE CONCERT. BEAUTIFUL. MINHO HITS DIFFERENTLY IRL. LIKE HIS SINGING IS SO ANGELIC AND WONDERFUL I LOVE HIM ! I LOVE ! HIM ! Hyunjin did a body roll because he was doing a “sexy version of My Pace” and wow my boy. Right there. Really going at it. 

THEY KEPT SLAPPING EACH OTHER’S ASSES DURING AWKWARD SILENCE LMAO LIKE OKAY THAT’S GREAT HAHAH During Felix’s part where he went “Marbling” someone slapped someone else’s but I can’t remember who asgkjh it was funny though because like their bottoms were facing us and you can just clearly see them slapping each other lol

Also some fans got a project together and they made red cellophane sleeves and blue sleeves for the lighsticks. During Hellevator we all held up our red sleeves and during Grow Up we held up the blue sleeves. It was sooo pretty being apart of the blue ocean in Grow Up :)

Then during the Mixtape #2 VCR, it showed clips of the boys doing their individual introductions during the survival show days. It sort of broke my heart in a good way. Idk how to explain that properly. But just seeing how far they’ve come... when it’s also only been a year.. and seeing how much they’ve grown and improved.. I love it so much. I love being a Stay. It’s sincerely one of the best things ever. 

Also since the concert venue was smaller compared to other concerts, I found the entire thing to be really cute. Because it was all so small and personal. We could really interact with the boys, and they interacted with us :’) I mean I sure would love to see them perform at the Honda Center, Staples Center or The Forum too. But this was a beautiful start. Having this small little concert and being with them :) 

The fans though... they’re such a beautiful sight. During certain parts of the concert, it would be pitch black. But the thing was, our lightsticks shined so brightly that it lit up the entire room. It was such a beautiful sight I loved it so much. 

I had a lot of fun at the concert though (as you can probably tell heh). :) It was just so fun being surrounded by other STAYs, singing, dancing, doing fan chants and more :) I love our boys so so so much and I miss them so much already. They’re really the light of my life. 

#stray kids #stray kids in la #there was one more thing but i totally forgot what to say about it :( maybe it'll hit me later #yeah the concert was amazing and truly one of the best experiences ever I love stray kids and stay so so much #also after all that #my mom says that her bias is Felix and Jeongin :')

[ivyjjk-blog]

Jikook Osaka Analysis

So a while back, someone messaged me, asking me to analyse the osaka vlive, at first I wasn't sure whether I wanted to or not since I have so much planned but then my taekook post was taking too long so I figured i'd just get this out of the way. Everyone is aware of the infamous Osaka Vlive there has been so much analysis about it which I have read but I have to disagree. I don't think Jimin was in that hotel room with jungkook. Ofcourse u're free to believe what you want but lets be realistic for a second.

So the vlive starts with taehyung in his hotel room and he decides to go to another member's room, at this point many people think he messaged jungkook and he probably did but we all know jungkook has a habit of ignoring any sort of texts or calls, the person who replies to taehyung is actually another member, most likely jin with jungkook's room number. So for the people saying jungkook knew tae was coming yet still asked "who is it", well that theory is debunked. Once tae is outside the room he knocks and calls "jungkookah, now here alot of people say they heard "jimin" but actually that's not the case, jungkook says "who is it" twice and tae replies with "i'm on v app" to which jk makes an exasperated sound like someone would say "tsck" which can easily be confused with "chim". If u don't believe me ask any k-armys who aren't jikook shippers they'll say the same infact in Korea it’s common for us to use such an expression to relay our feelings. Or he could literally be trying to say something but cuts himself off. Wouldn't you be annoyed if u finally unravelled in your personal space after a hectic day and then were expected to talk to thousands of fans in a dishevelled appearance? 

Now the next prominent thing people were asking was why jungkook was listening to such a song, naked without any lights on. First of all the lights weren't close, he had the lamp on and frankly at night you don't need all the lights on, secondly i don't know about u but i tend not to wear many clothes at night when i’m alone on my own, he most likely wasn’t totally naked, probably wearing shorts which is why we don't see his crotch imprint through his gown, majority of people tend not to wear many clothes at night hence why he took long opening the door. Also who doesn't listen to music on their own, he probably had a playlist playing sexy, fun, pop songs etc. No "he wasn't eating bread naked in his room". In my opinion and I could be wrong I believe (since I've done so myself many times) he was alone on his bed, probably shirtless, on his phone whilst listening to music just like anyone else would and having the occasional snack on the trolley in his room which every hotel provides (fun fact on the trolley there was a lot of food but plate and cup for one person) which if u actually try to be unbiased makes perfect sense. About why he still had makeup on, just think about how many times u left ur makeup on? he probably would've washed it off right before going to bed. He himself says to tae he hadn't washed up yet so most likely he was planning to laze about in bed Probably browsing online whilst eating+listening to music and then wash up+sleep. Makes more sense than their grand plan to hide jimin in the toilet.

Now to debunk a few quick "proofs" that white phone is jungkook's he puts it on the table after putting a song on bluetooth, it's well known jungkook has a black and white phone, also in the vlive the next day u can see jimin's phone is longer if u compare the screen sizes. Now for the shoes, the hotel room has it's own pair of small fluffy black sandals that we see by the bed, we also see jungkook's own shoes, now the black pumps near the suitcase are actually tae's pause at 7:07 and u can actually see tae is wearing them. and for the people saying the jacket on the chair in jimins...... i mean come on people it's just a black pile how on earth do u have any way of knowing its jimins? You can’t see any detail on it, u can’t see the size so how can u determine it's jms?

Moving on at 7:59 we apparently hear a door nob turning and shippers thought it was jimin who was supposedly hiding in the bathroom... actually the desk on the left side of the bed actually has a door like drawer and jungkook actually simply opened that making that sound. Also whilst there he presses some sort of master button that turns the light in the bathroom on, I know this because when jungkook is kneeling near the desk at 7:57, there's a click and he makes the "oh" sound in the next instance u can see the ceiling light near the curtain have also turned on and the whole room appears visibly brighter. He by mistake turned all the lights on, just pause at 7:58 u can clearly see all the ceiling lights turned on which weren’t before.

For the next part i have 2 theories First one: so whilst jk is still fiddling around with something on the desk tae lies down on the bed and when jungkook turns around he expects to see tae sititng on the edge on the bed but he's lying down so his immediate reaction is "oh u scared me". no seriously think about it, how many times have u gotten surprised by someone being in a different position than u imagine, he was looking at tae upside down from where he was standing it's very likely that's why he got shocked rather than jimin coming out of the bathroom. lets say it was jimin, why did tae not react? or even look in his direction? why would jungkook react so loudly if he knew jimin was there and was trying to hide him? My second theory is simply that some one-could be manager, another member or even hotel staff came in to maybe ask about something or inquire if they needed anything which startled jungkook since when tae cam in he didn't lock the door. like let's say jimin was hiding in the bathroom, why wouldn’t tae quickly go back making some sort of excuse? Yes u can fantasize saying tae was "teasing" them and what not but do u have any idea how reckless that would be? What if they'd been caught? they couldn't afford any such mistakes at that time and to imply that tae would be so careless or that jungkook wouldn't warn the hyungs before hand is frankly very silly. Futhermore if they were together then when tae comes he could simply say him and jimin were hanging out , who would doubt that? he didn;t need to hide him, he didn't need to say "im not wearing any clothes", it doesn't add up. Also if jm was hiding in the toilet we would definitely hear some sort of sound, their were bounts of quietness many times during the Iive and if there was another living being in the room we WOULD hear SOMETHING. Also “oh u said scared me” frankly sounds like jk, it's more high-pitched than that one time jimin says it, u're entitled to think it's jimin but that's highly unlikely

9:10 apparently alot of ppl saw the door on the right closing but clearly it's just the camera angles since the light refelctions don't change one bit u see it's still half open when tae's going back. About jk singing dear no one at someone near the bed and tae pointing there, honestly just watch the live again, jk looks in many directions, we know him as a shy boy, obviously when singing to thousands of fans in english he's gonna be a bit shy, even when he's talking in interviews he tends to look around and fix his attention on one spot. If there was someone there then we would've seen them when tae is going back, others say he was looking at jm who was hdiding in the toilet rather than near the bed, again that makes no sense. Also tae was pointing and moving his hand throughout the song, he wasn’t “pointing at jimin”.

Whilst they’re singing there's another click? that's actually tae's foot hitting the locks on the suitcase. I know this all sounds too convenient but so does the analysis about jimin being in the room, infact that's more unlikely than this. and tbh I've experienced these things myself so I’m able to think logically about what could cause these sounds and how these reactions can be explained. Also pay attention to the bed at 7:46 only the left side bears signs of messiness, the pillows slightly less fluffy and the cushion a bit downturned and the duvet has ripples in it, im sure if both jm and jk were doing the nasty they would need more than half of the bed. Yes jk  tried to clean it before tae came in but the right side looks immaculate, doesn't bear the signs of being hastily cleaned like the left side.

When tae mentions jm at 13:44 jk gives no reaction at all now think about it if he was hididng jm and was scared about them being found out would he be so nonchalant? No not at all he would at least jerk at the mention and not be so placid. the "are u going to jms now" is so nonchalant its just not realistic for him to act like that if he jm was in the room and tae wouldn't say he’s going there to tease him, if that’s code for something then "jin is taking a bath right now" must be code for something too, jk must be hiding jin in his room wow. Moving on analysing the timeframe of tae leaving the room vs jk closing the door is so silly, tae is going at a snails pace and he’s talking to  jk, he even stops in between at 13:52, also he has to open the door which takes another 2 seconds  so it's no surprise really that he left the room in 15 seconds and jk closed the door in 6 seconds. 

Then tae goes to his own room. yes he said he was gonna go to jms but he either changed his mind(like we all do) or wanted to get something from his room before going there (the possibilities are endless). Outside his room tae makes that face since he forgot his room card/keys inside so now he's locked out and that sound u hear at 14:13 is NOT jimin or jungkook. tae's room is pretty far from jungkook's room there's no way we could hear it, there’s alot of people talking in the hallway also it doesn't even sound like them. We don't even hear his room door opening again so how could they have come out to "scold" tae. The slight door opening sound u hear at 14:11 can be anyone's room there were so many people whispering in the corridor it's not unlikely that it was another guest's room. Then he closes his live to try to find another way to get into his room but before that why on earth would jm and jk come out to confront tae knowing he's still live if they went through all that trouble to hide? it's just not realistic.

The next day apparently jimin was "petty" towards tae and jk had scolded tae too, if u watch tht vlive they both tell u why, I mean sure u can play connect the dots but that won't make it true, correlation is not causation

And for the peope saying jk was annoyed at tae for barging into his room, excuse me but he was tired, it was late, they probably has a long day and he wanted his own space, he was in no way annoyed “at tae”, more at the situation. Also lets not act like he wasn't this annoyed or even more at jimin when he crashed his interview just saying. even if u love some one and are dating them (not saying taekook are) you still need ur personal space and there are times u want to be left alone, and since Jung kook is an introvert that is even more likely.

#bts #jikook #jikook analysis #taekook #osaka vlive

[mercyofficial]

out of the dark

summary: Sombra's two favorite things are making new friends and exposing corporate corruption, and today she intends to do both.

notes: inspired by this art by @greyopal! i love these two so much ahhhh, and im definitely gonna write more for them!

ao3 link

Her printer has to be the slowest in the world. She shelled out a thousand dollars for this machine and it’s been taking ten minutes to print like, seven files. Sombra always keeps a hard copy of her work until it’s finished. Then she burns it.

  Some people use paper shredders, but Sombra can’t stand the thought of leaving a trace. That eye is constantly in her head.

  The files are pulled up on her computer screen, glowing a dim blue. Risky (what if someone were looking through the window?), but she wants to admire her work. Vishkar may not be anywhere near as good at helping people as the public thinks they are, but they do have excellent computer security. Nothing is impenetrable, though, not to Sombra - especially not corporate corruption.

  Grabbing the ink-dampened paper, Sombra quickly flips through the pages, ensuring all had printed correctly. They’ll be locked inside a file cabinet (protected by three alarms and fourteen different kinds of computer-controlled encrypted locks) until she’s finished with them, and then she’ll burn everything in there and change the locks. Sombra never writes a password down, too risky. Besides, if I forgot one, I could probably hack into my own system, she thinks with amusement. Although that’s probably not a good thing, maybe she should beef up. Talon won’t be pleased if she asks more money for security - but she’s a valuable asset . So they’ll pay up. Always do. Maybe she should ask for a horse ranch, claim it’s vital to her work. Or seventy copies of the Linkin Park discography and hide them in Reaper’s room.

  Snickering at her own jokes, Sombra throws the files in the cabinet and shuts the door, which automatically locks. She doesn’t bother to grab any extra equipment on the way out the door to catch her flight. Her internal cyber-enhancements will suffice for this job - well, job isn’t exactly the right word. This is more of a personal project. She isn’t exactly expecting resistance, anyway.

  Will the files be enough to sink the company? Of course not. If (and probably when) she publishes them, they’ll be a PR disaster, but there’ll be a few firings and some monetary loss and some tearful, paid off citizens going on about how much Vishkar has done for their community and how they know they can learn from their mistakes, and ten days later the company will have three new major contracts.

  They are enough to make a new friend, though. And Sombra loves making new friends.

  ----------------

  She’s parked herself in a cyber cafe near Vishkar’s headquarters, in a corner, giving the security a once-over. She already has the blueprints, and in particular, the on-location apartment of her soon-to-be new friend. This was not going to be difficult. Nowadays, companies are so focused on keeping out hackers that they neglect physical security. With that in mind, her stolen translocating technology, invisibility camouflage, and, of course, laser gun, will practically guarantee her unlimited access to a building if she’s careful. And Sombra is always careful.

  Her target is Satya Vaswani, aka Symmetra (Symmetra, symmetry, subtle, much. Sombra spent a few minutes eye-rolling when she read that one.) A top Architech at Vishkar, and seems to truly believe her company is making the world a better place. Naive, but Sombra can’t be too annoyed with her. They’re quite alike, after all, if she thinks about it: impoverished with a difficult childhood, an aptitude for technology that got them out of the slums, and willing enough to commit crimes for their aims.

  That’s where it ends, though. Satya had been plucked from the streets by Vishkar and made their golden girl, but Sombra had joined gangs and fought everyone and everything tooth and nail for what she has now. Satya wants to improve the world. Sombra just wants to control it.

  Though, considering Vishkar’s methods and that Symmetra cooperated with them, they might be similar that way, as well. Although she did have to note, Symmetra went along. Who knows what Satya gets up to in her free time? Sombra can’t help but giggle. She doubts a secret rebellion. From what she’s read and seen of the girl, she seems like a rule-follower, regardless of what the rules were.

  These might change that, though , Sombra thinks, glancing down at the screen displaying the files she’d hacked directly from the CEO’s laptop a week or two ago.

  Sombra had thought about going after the CEO himself. The files she has won’t sink the company, but they’ll sink him , and she’s sure he’d do whatever she asked to keep himself afloat. But what Vishkar’s doing strikes something in Sombra, because they’re hurting those like she had been, orphans on streets who don’t have the talents she has to get themselves out. Sombra wants the men in charge of Vishkar in prison, at least, if she can’t get them dead. And they won’t be any help if they’re in prison or hell.

  But, in Satya’s case, Sombra seriously doubts she knows what’s really going on at Vishkar. Maybe she really should call it naivety, to not realize, but she has a feeling it isn’t - Satya seems like she really does just want to make the world a better place, and may be doing some unconscious selective noticing to accomplish it. Sombra can empathize with that. And not only does she want a new friend (the leading manipulator of hard light tech? a force ), but maybe she’s taking a small liking to Satya. And it would probably be better finding out your life’s work was nearly pointless because of corruption in private, rather than from national TV the next morning, with reporters hunting down every bit of contact information you have.

   It’s a weekend night, and the clubs are full as Sombra makes her way to the headquarters. The multitudes of people on the street make it easy to slip around to a back entrance, go invisible, and take out the security guy with a nerve strike to the neck. Touching her cybernetic fingers to the locks, programs she’s already tested on locks just like this one spring to life, slipping into the bugs and wires and feeding the codes back to her. She drops a translocator in a bush for safety and sneaks in, again going invisible just long enough to reach the nearest security camera. Within seconds, her custom applications have thrown a bug into the system that’ll feed the cameras endless ten-second loops. With luck, the person watching the security cameras will be like most corporate employees who watch security cameras - bored and playing the latest hot app instead of paying attention.

  If not, and she senses any alarm, she’s pretty sure she gave herself enough time to get to the security room and place a well-aimed laser blast at his chest before he notices her. Won’t kill him, but he won’t be happy. Which doesn’t matter to her, of course. Sombra doesn’t go out of her way to kill. As long as he’s out of her way, she doesn’t exactly care.

  Now Sombra really books it, dashing through the hallways using the blueprint she memorized, only occasionally pausing to confirm a direction or go invisible to let some politely-laughing businessmen carrying briefcases walk through. She decides to take the elevator, figuring her invisibility will last long enough to make the ride if someone gets on. Vishkar’s headquarters are gigantic , a sign of the company’s power, but luckily they aren’t exactly tall. Dashing into the hallway where the elevators are, she clicks the up button and slips in, consulting her blueprint once more before pressing 7.

  As it’s night, the headquarters aren’t busy, so Sombra isn’t bothered - and once she gets off at floor 7, there’s even less people. Even if she hadn’t already hacked into Satya’s calendar, Sombra seriously doubts that she wouldn’t find the Architech in her room. Satya didn’t give off a vibe of friendliness, and a look further back into her calendar, with events meticulously added and color-coded and lacking any color for “fun”, confirmed this.

  Sombra smiles slightly as she strolls along the hallway - there’s another similarity to her little list. She herself certainly isn’t against going out to a club and flirting with a girl or guy or two of each, but relationships of any kind are off the table. The whole “hacker on a one-woman crusade to take control of the world” sort of prevents that, and friends are just going to want stuff in the end. Her closest companions are probably frequent Talon mission mates Reaper and Widowmaker, and when the people you’re closest to are a literal wraith and a blue ballet-dancer-turned-assassin, you probably don’t have many friends.

  She gets to Satya’s door. It’s a simple, sleek white piece of work, computer controlled with some great security. Unless you’re Sombra, of course, in which case it takes a few touches and a click. It would have been even easier if she could have just ripped the passwords from Satya’s computer, but the other woman didn’t seem to write any passwords down, either. I wonder if she’s as paranoid as I am, ha. Sombra activates her invisibility and drops a translocator before entering the keycode and opening the door with a soft whoosh. She steps inside, and it closes behind her with nearly no sound.

  The room is stark, all white and pale blue with not much customization. It’s quite beautiful and modern, or at least Sombra thinks so. She doesn’t have as much time to explore as she would like, because apparently Satya also doesn’t believe in bedtime and is sitting on a ledge, next to her window. Presumably, she was enjoying the admittedly quite excellent view of the night sky before her door mysteriously opened, though she doesn’t seem to be panicking. Sombra takes her time, making sure the door has locked them in and all the alarms are disabled before plopping down on the cushion across from Satya and making herself visible.

  “Hola, amiga,” she chirps, resting her elbow against the window and giving her a bright smile. Satya looks unamused. Sombra had thought she was quite pretty from the television interviews she’d seen (and the secret selfies she may have examined when going through the contents of Satya’s phone), and the woman is even more beautiful up close, dark brown eyes giving Sombra a once-over before lifting back up to meet Sombra’s own.  

  “I would ask who you are, but I doubt you intend to tell me.”

  Sombra giggles. “Ooh, you’re astute! No, I don’t. I know who you are, though, Satya. Quite a name you’ve made for yourself at Vishkar, yes?”

  Satya frowns. “I don’t know what you’re trying to do, but I will not be bribed. Or undermine the company, so don’t even try.” Sombra notices something, in her right hand, presumably some device used to alarm someone who will make life far more irritating for Sombra. She leans over, quick as a flash, placing her hand over the other woman’s own and grinning right in her face.

  “Oh, I don’t need to get you to do it. They do enough of that themselves. I’m just interested in, oh….. informing you.”

  There’s a slight pause, and then she feels Satya’s fingers, slowly, one by one, remove themselves from the button. Sombra snatches it out of her hand, but Satya doesn’t react, except for her suspicious frown deepening as Sombra leans back.

  “I’m listening.”

  Sombra smiles. She’s played this game, a thousand times before. Steal incriminating files, sneak in, show them to the right person, and bam! A lovely, helpful new friend. Sombra may not have any close friends, but she certainly has a lot of them.

  Sombra slips off the cushion and walks over to the table, beckoning for Satya to join her. Warily, Satya gets up, quietly walking over a wooden chair and seating herself in it, expectantly.

  “Just wait a moment.” She pulls up her screen through her gloves, clicking through to her files as Satya watches. She looks slightly irritated, probably because much of Sombra’s equipment, from her invisibility to the screens she’s using right now, are quite blatantly stolen Vishkar hard-light technology (the translocator was from the talking gorilla, she hacked the blueprints of that chronal thing he made for the annoying Brit and quite ingeniously redesigned them, if she does say so herself). She seems about to say something, but just then Sombra finds the files she was looking for, pulling them up. “Look through them as you wish, I’m sure you know your way around this sort of screen.”

  Satya looks at her. Just for one second, and Sombra’s not sure what the other’s trying to read from her face before Satya turns back to the screen and tentatively touches a finger to it. She’s a fast reader, Sombra can tell from how quickly she’s flipping through them - files directly ripped from the company computers, newspaper reports and pictures put next to each other that line up in highly suspicious ways, reports of what the corporation has told Satya to do and what papers to get, but then the part she doubted Satya had known, added parts of what exactly the company intended to do with those files.

  It’s damning, and Sombra can see Satya’s life falling down around her pretty face.

  She gets to the last file, and Satya pauses, for another long second, eyes moving across the screen, before slowly removing her finger from it and dropping her head into her hands. One look had obviously been enough. Sombra jabs a finger at it, a “missing” financial report clearly showing the Vishkar executives spending money that was supposed to go to the Rio housing facilities on a luxury jet.

  “You see, Satya? Vishkar was lying to you all along.”

  Satya doesn’t move. Or speak. Or cry. Sombra is not actually sure she’s breathing.

  She’s quiet for a very long time.

  It makes Sombra nervous, being here for this long. It’s risky. Whenever Sombra goes to make new friends, they don’t shut down. They snark, they scowl, they plead, they try and act superior, and she loves it. But Satya is silent, processing what Sombra has shown her, and Sombra, for reasons unknown to even herself, decides to wait.

  Finally, as Sombra watches, Satya stands up and walks over to a counter where a blue bag is sitting. She reaches inside the bag, and takes out two things - an extremely official-looking Vishkar license and a cellphone. Calmly and without saying anything, she proceeds to drop the license on the floor and crush it with the heel of her boot. Sombra nearly jumps from loud cracking noise, as Satya methodically sweeps the pieces into a corner with said boot and picks up the cellphone.

  “Hello?” She sounds far more put together then Sombra thinks she would in this sort of situation. “Yes, it’s Satya. I thought I should inform you that I’m feeling very sick right now, so I won’t be able to attend tonight’s meeting…….No, no, it’s alright, I just need some more rest. Mm-hmm…...Thank you for your concern. Goodbye.”

  The cellphone drops on the counter, and Satya turns back around. Sombra looks at her.

  “You’re not going to tell them I’m here?”

  Satya’s hand tightens into a fist. She’s angry, Sombra realizes, not broken or whatever stupid trope one would usually expect. Angry enough that tears are beginning to leak from the sides of her eyes – not noticeably, but they’re there. Sombra thinks she looks very pretty crying, but also decides that this is not the time to mention so. “I trust you more than….than I trust them, at the moment.”

  Sombra stays quiet, as Satya walks over the the window. She’s pacing now, around the room. The files are still pulled up over the table, floating there, winking, purple little puzzle pieces that line up to make something terrible.

  “We were supposed to be doing good.” she mutters, each word clipped, teeth sounding clenched. She whirls around to face Sombra, turning her gaze on her. Sombra flinches involuntarily. She is not one easily scared, and Satya’s anger is not that outwardly expressed. But her eyes have a silent, terrifying intensity.

  “Why are you showing me these things?” she asks, boring holes in Sombra’s eyes with her own. “What do you want from me?” That’s another similarity, Sombra thinks, because from the tone in Satya’s voice she’s asked that question many times, albeit probably with a different tone of voice. Everyone always wants something from you, when you’re good.

  Sombra doesn’t smile, like she usually would. But business is business. “I’m publishing them, see. I dislike Vishkar as much as you probably do now - and you probably have more puzzle pieces than me. But these’ll get you thrown in prison too, most likely. All I want is a favor, every so often, if I need it, and then I’ll wipe your name and incriminating info from the files when I publish them.”

  Usually, when she makes these sort of offers, the person hesitates. She’s had people refuse or try to take her out then and there, thinking prison is better than being beholden to an (in their minds) insane hacker. Satya does not hesitate.

  “Fine.”

  Sombra raises an eyebrow at her. “Eager, are we?”

  “I want to make the world a better place. That is all. I cannot do so from in prison, but I can out of it, and for that I can afford a few favors to you - especially as you are the one opening my eyes to reality in the first place. I do not think you are a bad person, and I doubt you’ll ask me to do anything too terrible.”

 That deserves a slight laugh. “Oh, now there’s a first! You should hear what other people have called me in the past. So, you will leave?”

  “Yes.”

  “Well, no need to give me contact information. I’m sure I can find you.” Satya doesn’t appear to find that amusing, sadly, already pulling out a laptop. Sombra closes her screens, standing there. She’s quite tempted to ask Satya what exactly she intends to do now. But it’s getting light, now, and she’s already been here far, far too long. She’s about to melt away into the shadows, but then Satya, still looking at her laptop screen, speaks.

  “What should I refer to you as?”

  “Pardon?”

  “If we’re going to be working together in some form, I would like to know what to call you.”

  Sombra shouldn’t tell her.

  “Sombra.” Then she vanishes.

  -------------------

  Sombra gets out of the building, no problem, as expected. But she can’t forget those eyes of Satya’s, so brightly intense even right after watching her world fall down around her. Though, to be fair, Sombra doubts the woman suspected nothing even before the files. She’s a smart one.

  She edits the online copy of the files on her plane ride home, the one set to be sent mysteriously to several top reporters with instructions to publish as soon as possible - as promised, taking out all references to Symmetra or Satya Vaswani. It’s not difficult, there’s not really that much. Just enough to be threatening.

 Her hard copy in the file cabinet, with the incriminating info, is what she spends four hours staring at. It’s irrational, she knows. Satya could be useful. She should keep her leverage.

  She can’t stop thinking about those eyes, though.

  All Sombra has ever wanted was control. But Satya…...Satya wants to do good, so, so badly. If someone ever got into this apartment…..

  She glances at her computer. She hacked Satya’s laptop, of course, and her recent browsing history is running through the screen. Satya must have opened two tabs before she went to sleep. One was a normal search for the word sombra. The other was a search, in a private, untraceable browser, for “overwatch recall”.

  Sombra burns the files.

#symbra #symmetra #satya vaswani #sombra #overwatch #angst #I LOVE THEM SO MUCH #THERES NOT ENOUGH CONTENT SO IM MAKING IT MYSELF #ALL OF IT #alex writes #text #my posts #although idk if i really have them Down™ yet #im not sure it would go exactly like this #i think there could be more slow burnish things

[resilientreader]

1-98 for asks like we did a million years ago, I dare you

i knew the MOMENT i saw the notif in my inbox that it was gonna be YOU pulling this shit and i crossed my fingers when actually clicking, HOPING i wouldnt have to answer all 98, maybe you’ll be tame this time, but no! this is what you’re doing to me. and ykno what, Fine. u dare me and i Will do it. i hope u rb the asks post so i can do it to u too, tho

1. coffee mugs

2. chocolate bars

3. bubblegum

4. that smart student who always read instead of actually paying attention

5. soda from glass cups is the best

6. its hard to just Decide between all these styles so ill say which one applies to mine most, which i Gotta say has to b preppy even if i want like goth or grunge to b mixed in

7. headphones

8. good omens, fmab, castlevania, uhhhh. those are just the ones ive watched so far this summer

9. my grandparents’ home. which is kinda weird but i have a lot of summer memories there

10. i sucked at like Everything in p.e., there Was no best

11. leftovers

12. i cant choose a favorite playlist?? /some/ of them, tho, are soar my ethereal heart, neither here nor there, mountainside storms, and sync of my heartbeat. so like any of my more recent ones

13. lanyard

14. i had to google a list for this bc honestly i always eat just chocolates but i like starburst

15. fahrenheit 451 was a rly fun read. ray bradbury’s writing gave me inspo for metaphors and writing and such and it was rly nice

16. sprawled across one of those comfy armchairs where i can swing my legs over one arm n lay my head on the other one

17. my black converse

18. cool temperature and rain without storms, or a cloudy day that lets me take a nice walk

19. on my side if i can but on my back otherwise

20. on my laptop, in google docs, to be more specific

21. winnie the pooh

22. idk?? i try not to look to just one person for a source of “this is how i should be”, so i guess,,,, a mix of family members and then a couple like more famous ppl??? which would basically consist of one of my aunts, my dad, and jenna marbles, to keep my Brain Process for role model stuff simplified

23. i dunno if any of the habits i have are strange?? i bounce my right leg and my right hand kinda. like. shakes when im nervous. i cant rly think of anything else i do tho i Know i probably have other habits

24. amethyst or pyrite

25. ur really just assuming my memory is good enough for this but if i had to say, it’d be any popular song from 2009 specifically

26. hide in my room with a fan and ac

27. read with a blanket wrapped around me or smth

28. atlas: six by sleeping at last, flaws by bastille, atlas: five by sleeping at last, she by dodie, and neptune by sleeping at last. there are probably more/better ones but those are the first ones i found

29. listen. be open with me. talk with me. not to sound like that person, but sharing ur life secrets is a rly big ice breaker for me because it helps let me know i can trust u. but also idk im a really awkward person and can accidentally distance myself from ppl so when ppl notice theres smth up w me or even do the bare minimum of doing Their part to maintain a friendship, that’s always rad as shit when idk how to communicate what i need

30. my room, my high school’s auditorium, the local barnes and noble

31. black boots, black jeans, any button-up shirt that’ll match that combination OR a really cool sweatshirt

32. im a bad bitch, you cant kill me. road work ahead? uh, i sure hope it does. it is wednesday, my dudes! welcome to chili’s. i love you, bitch, and i ain’t ever gonna stop loving you, bitch.

33. probably “omg” or “oh my god”

34. sc johnson. a family company.

35. i dont even have one but on a good night like 10-11

36. the troll face memes

37. suitcases feel much more organized

38. lemonade

39. lemon cake

40. ummmmm....one time a tech/theatre kid left a paint can sitting out in the open accidentally and a person took a shit in it or smth then knocked over the can, spilled a bunch of paint, and tried to clean it up w a broom and proceeded to like snap the broom in half. then they ran away to leave the kids to clean it up the next day. i wasnt actually there for that but ive heard the story firsthand enough times to Know

41. my dad

42. jacket pockets

43. hoodie is what i wear, tho everything else is Very Good

44. lavender

45. fantasy, my dudes

46. this set of pjs i got for xmas w a soft tshirt and matching baggy flannel pants

47. colby jack

48. uhhh a banana?? i could probably give a better answer if i was more

49. i dont rly live by a quote or saying, i just Go for it

50. my sister has probably done smth before to like Break me

51. everything ever but mostly myself

52. arial

53. uhhh...kinda worn? my nails aren’t doin so good and i have a couple scratches and stuff that Still havent healed after a few weeks

54. get a move on

55. the ugly duckling

56. tradition is kinda vague but i like that it became tradition for me and my siblings to go to my grandparents’ home every summer

57. i think im still overcoming like everything ive been faced with ever

58. writing? listening, helping, giving advice. idk tbh like talents who?

59. "jesus christ, my dude”

60. a fantasy/comedy, or at least if its gonna be fantasy with death and stuff, it should be dope as fuck

61. "isn’t vulnerability the opposite of being in control?” from a webcomic called aerial magic. super simple but the entire scene leading up to it,,,,,so good

62. umm fuck! i dont kno whether favs r usually ones that i relate to or ones that i wanna b like but??? keith from voltron, jirou from bnha, chromedome and/or rewind from transformers/mtmte, sypha from castlevania, and jayfeather from warriors

63. planetary (go!) by mcr, the seed by aurora, hayloft by mother mother, the cup/halloween blues from relient k, choke by i dont know how but they found me

64. coolmath was THE shit

65. yes! two on my leg from a surgery i had to get to realign my femur, bc i snapped the bone in half

66. lavender, snowdrops, hibiscus

67. i dont really have any, mostly bc i have a hard time attaching like. That sorta meaning to just random objects, but i do still have a small teddy bear stashed safely away in my room from when i was a little babee

68. pickle-flavored pringles. disgusting. would not recommend

69. lions’ roars can be heard up to 5 miles away from the original source

70. right handed

71. horizontal stripes, i guess? there’s not much wrong with them but i just Never wear them

72. math

73. i dont usually eat /weird/ flavor combos, even tho ill eat basically anything, but i like ketchup in mac and cheese sometimes. or fries in shakes. chicken and waffles. stuff like that

74. 11

75. idek honestly, my memory is too bad

76. hashbrowns

77. i dont kno a Lot of plants off the top of my head other than the Basic ones but literally any flower in a windowsill is like bone apple teeth in my mind

78. sushi from a grocery store. publix taught me that grocery stores can, in fact, be trusted when needed

79. my school id photo

80. earth tones

81. fireflies

82. pc

83. writing

84. talk radio is nostalgic but podcasts are always more entertaining to actually listen to

84. polly pocket

85. mythology with a dash of fairytales

86. cupcakes, because of my dog’s name

87. abandonment

88. to grow unbreakable attachments with everyone i care very deeply about and grow into an old age with them, or something

89. i feel like answering this question totally honestly would hurt ppl’s feelings, but also i literally could think of like 4 people to put down for this and i’m bad at deciding, esp w smth like this, so. not to b vague but These People kno who they are

90. becoming a part of a certain website with a bad crowd and managing to pick out the good apples in such a rotten batch

91. boxes

92. lamps /and/ fairy lights

93. i dont rly have any but my parents call me hannah banana. that’s ab it, tho

94. fall/winter? it kinda is inconsistent because fall has bad weather in florida but winter is when like everything has Gone Wrong in life these past few years, but then fall has such a GOOD aesthetic and my birthday is in winter, so they’re pretty even rn

95. uhhh??? thats such a weird thing, to try and assign a “favorite” app, but the only thing i could think to say would be spotify just bc i use it so much on my phone, even if the app itself isnt the greatest

96. i havent set one, actually, bc im lazy and havent found anything that’d fit

97. 2 and a half

98. the part where fish were learning that they could walk on land

#asks #resilientspeaker #trying to put this under read more #but either tumblr doesnt let asks to do that or its not showing me anything #either way if this Does show to b a long post sorry ab that

[icarushasfallenfromthestars]

Found (Outside The Screen) (Dream x GN! Reader) Part 2

Request: That dream angst fuckin wrecked my heart..any chance for a part 2 with comfort(im not the og requester so if not thats fine its just OUGH my heart)

I have written this three times over because tumblr didn’t save it. THEN. Tumblr doesn’t show it to ANYONE unless they check my account. This happened to my Ranboo fic as well... I will honestly cry if no one sees this.

Part 1 

Once again. This is a completely fictitious story and version of Clay.

TW: Panic attacks, self deprecating thoughts,

"(Y/n)!"

His voice echoed through the house as you scrambled around corners to escape the possible wrath of your boyfriend. Or maybe even soon to be ex boyfriend.

Despite living in this house with him for a little over two years, it was beginning to feel like a maze. You couldn't tell which way was left and which way was right, your head spinning with panic as you gasped for breath.

He's gonna find you...

The house wasn't even that big, and quite an open concept, so you had no idea why you were finding it so confusing. All you knew at the moment was...

Get out.

Once your eyes landed on the door that lead out, you made a beeline towards it and flung it open. Maybe you should've known better than to attempt to run from the manhunt god...

The footsteps pounding against the floor not too far behind you startled you enough to jump outside and slam the door behind you in hopes of giving yourself enough time to run farther.

There were plenty of things failing to register in your mind as you ran down the empty sidewalks. Such as the poor choice (or lack) of shoes you were wearing, or even the heavy night rain pelting down on your shaking body.

Your lungs were burning.. But your brain had thrown itself so far into fight or flight mode that you had no care for anything around you, hardly blinking twice as the signs of unfamiliar street names flew past you.

Eventually, when you physically couldn't breathe any longer, you sat on a bench and took awhile to think. The consistent rain pelting down on your head was actually a decent grounder to help you snap yourself out of it... But that only caused more confusion and another wave of panic to wash over you.

Where... were you?

Doesn't matter. Don't go back.

Oh God... He hates you..

Why wouldn't he..?

He was too embarrassed to show you to his chat!

What did you do that was so embarrassing?

God.. What was so wrong with you that he stayed in his streaming room for days on end!?

Pulling your knees up to your chest, you choked back a few sobs, trying your best to keep what was left of your composure. Very quickly, however, you gave up on trying to hold yourself together and broke down, hiding your face in your knees.

Time seemed to pass by way too quickly but also way too slowly at the same time.. Like time itself was giving you the one finger salute. When you finally stopped crying, you leaned back against the back of the bench and gave a shaky sigh before you decided to attempt to think rationally again.

You had no clue where you were. Nothing looked familiar. What time is it? No clue, you don't have your... Your phone!

You quickly scrambled to your pocket to pull out the cellular device, and stared at the black screen for a few seconds. Anxiety was the reason for your hesitance as you stared into your reflection, frowning slightly. Without thinking twice, you pressed the button and the screen lit up with various arrays of colours.

78 Missed calls from Clay💚

2 Missed calls from George👓🇬🇧

7 Missed calls from Sapnap🔥

Was... He so mad that his friends were trying to yell at you too? You tilted your head slightly and scrolled through the other notifications on your lockscreen.

Twitter seemed to be losing their minds over your boyfriend's stream and wondering who the stranger was. Seeing the headlines flooded you with immeasurable guilt and you almost put your phone down again, if your phone didn't start buzzing.

You glanced down at the screen and say Clay was making call number 79... Man, he was persistent.. and he would probably continue to call until you answered...

Your finger hovered over the decline button, before slowly moving over and landing on the green one instead. "...Hello...?"

"(Y/n)...?" Had... He been crying...? "Oh my god! You're alive!" He gasped out with glee before giving a few sobs of... relief...?

"...You... Aren't... Mad?" You whispered very softly and hesitantly, your voice scratchy and sore from crying.

He sighed and there was a little bit of shuffling as well as a few male voices in the background. "No. Not in the slightest... Where are you? I want to apologize in person.. And when it doesn't sound like you're in a hurricane.."

You lifted your head up to look at the rain that was continuing to pelt down on you before looking around. "..I'm not sure.." You heard your partner echo your statement in question form as you looked for street signs through the rain. Glancing back at your phone, you saw the screen light up again, this time it was a warning label.

Your battery was almost dead...

"C-Clay.. My phone is going to die.." You murmured softly, your heart filling with dread as you turned down your brightness and closed any unnecessary apps.

There was a little bit of clattering and shuffling on the line as Clay hurriedly walked from the windows to the door, trying to see you from the home. "G-give me landmarks! Hurry!" He practically begged as you shot up from your bench, ignoring the burning soreness in your legs.

Spinning around quickly, you began listing off a few company buildings you saw, trying to shout over the rain and a few cars driving by. "Yeah-yeah! There's also that little sushi place beside the restaurant too.."

You heard the furious typing of his computer before another almost sob of relief. "You're on Rosewood Avenue... How the hell did you run that far? Okay, you're going to walk in the opposite direction of the sushi place until you reach a road called Miller Road, got that?" He waited for a verbal noise of agreement before continuing, "Once you get there, turn left and keep walking straight until you get to a steakhouse. I'll meet you half way, if you don't see me there, don't move unless you have to. Got it?" He asked firmly, with a small hint of desperation in his tone.

You rubbed your face as you mentally repeated the directions to yourself. "Yeah.. Yeah.. I got it." You began to walk along the sidewalks, your shoulders beginning to tremble from the water induced shivers trailing up and down your spine.

"..(Y/n)?"

"Yeah?"

"I lov-"

Your phone died..

Pulling the device away from your head, you pressed the buttons a few times before groaning and shoving it into your pockets as you began to walk.

Your mind was blurry but also hyper aware along the walk to the road where Clay told you to go. 'What was he going to say? If... He doesn't hate me... was he going to say- No.. no. He hadn't said that line in over a few months now.. No reason why he would say it now..' You mentally scolded yourself.

The rain didn't seem to be too keen on letting up as you walked through large rippling puddles. Your clothes were soaked, your hair completely drenched and you were pretty sure you were gonna need to buy a new phone with how much your current one was getting waterlogged..

You rose your arm to shield your face from the onslaught of water that a car had caused by driving through a large puddle before running your hand down your face.

Part of you was still a bit.. angry... at Clay... He had ignored you for so long and wanted nothing to do with you.. Then suddenly you spill hot coffee on yourself and then boom, you have the man more focused than when he has a good speed run seed. What about all those times you were begging him to come to bed, or at least eat dinner at the table with you? Did you only matter when you were in pain?

Biting your lip, you shook off the thought as you looked up again to see the steakhouse that you were directed to go to, the signs glowingly and people shuffling in and out through the doors...

Then there was another man, standing under a large black umbrella wearing a damp lime green hoodie...

Only you'd recognize that face anywhere where others wouldn't.. Standing in the street lights perfectly was your boyfriend, Clay.

Your heart trembled but also melted slightly upon seeing that he wasn't paying attention to his screen anymore. You. He was focused on finding you...

As you began to walk closer, you saw him lift his head and stare at you for a few seconds before dropping the umbrella and lunge forward to wrap you in a loving embrace. "I'm sorry.." Was the first thing he whispered, his voice almost as hoarse as yours. "I know.. that a simple apology will never excuse what I put you through... You cared for me, and even after a stupidly ignored you... You still didn't leave, or get angry. I don't deserve you, I know that, and you have every right to be upset, angry or whatever you're feeling right now.. Please, it doesn't matter how long it takes... Just let me make it up to you and let me prove myself worthy of your love again.."

Your lips parted in surprise as you stared at him, the streetlight poorly capturing his normal beauty, but still doing it well enough that you felt your heart soar. "Clay..." Your eyes traced his features, his puffy and reddened eyes and his cheeks stained with tear tracks, "You have a lot to work and make up for... I'm not going to forgive you immediately, but I'm not going to leave you.. We can work things out.. Together, okay?"

He eagerly nodded and gently held your face in his hands before pressing a light kiss to your forehead. "I'll break away from video editing and streaming for a while.. So I can focus on repairing things with you.."

You buried your face into the male's sweater, that was beginning to become soaked as well from the rain and you, and closed your eyes as you wrapped your arms around him.

"(Y/n)?"

"Mm..?"

"I love you."

"I love you too, Clay."

#dreamwastaken #dreamwastaken x reader #dreamwastaken x you #mcyt x reader #mcyt #dream mcyt #x reader #reader insert #read #self insert #dream smp #dream team

[apsbicepstraining]

A first-time wearables user refreshes the Fitbit Alta HR

Fitbit has eight different fitness trackers on the market right now. And while the companys financials are downright troubling, its still carrying more commodity that every other wearable corporation. Thats due in part to incredible refer identification, solid product design and mainstream entreaty. The company offers eight different tiers of products, but theyre all layout with everyone in mind.

The Alta HR falls somewhere in the middle. At $150, the cost isnt inconsequential, but its still cheap enough to be a populist machine. Its not designed with long distance runners or cross fit radicals in knowledge simply people who are looking for some help to step up their competition a little bit. Saunter more, stand up more frequently, maybe sleep a bit better and suck more water.

So we handed the device off to a first time wearable wearerer. By style of interpreting her fitness record, our producer Veanne told me a legend about how she and a sidekick are applied to stand outside the neighbourhood gym dining burritos within eyeshot of poor, sweaty treadmill runners.( I was in college she says in her protection ).

But karma caught up to me, she lent. Now Im in my 30 s, everything is lumpy. Im coughing going up two flights of stairs and it sucks. Im trying to take better care of myself.

So opportunity presented itself in the form of a salmon-colored Fitbit Alta HR review, a $150 piece of wearable engineering that she wouldnt going to go out of her channel to buy herself. But shes spent the last week wearing it around and largely enjoying the experience. Its not a love story, precisely, but its a unfold tie-in, even if its one that ultimately ended, as so many do, with one party swimming face down in the toilet.

Doesntquitefitbit

A Fitbit should fit. Its right there in the call. But the one-size-fits-all approach is an on-going issue with wearables in general. Some, of course, are worse offenders than others. The Galaxy S3 and LG Watch Sport immediately spring to mind. The bulky designs are fairly representative the male-centric approach many producers take with their devices.

Fitbits certainly more populist in its product design. The company is mainstream to a fault, and nothing in the companys cable comes anywhere near those smartwatches insane majority. The company offers strips up in different sizes as well, but the module itself is the same on both. At 54, our intrepid make is an inch shy of the average summit for the purposes of an American female, but still noticed the Alta a bit uncomfortably huge when she firstly tried it on.

Its a bit too big for me, she excused. I actually have to wear it backwards for it to fit, means that, in the week thats elapsed, shes worn the design with the spectacle facing down. When she needs to check notifications, she turns her wrist over. Not the end of the world, but not ideal.

Also, stylistically, its one of the nicer articles of hardware the company has raised. Though, as Veanne will merrily advise, simply dont get the salmon-colored one. I, too, can confirm that its not a great look.

Life coach

Wearability aside, Veanne told me that shes pretty well won over by the thing or at least the idea of having fitness trackers in general. And surely Fitbit offers one of the more shiny suffers in its category. The driving part there has been one of the key pleads of fitness trackers all along: motivation.

Theres the inherent incite influence of simply buying and wearing the thing, like tying a piece of string around your paw to remind you that really shouldnt precisely be sitting around the working day. Fitbits also improved its change reminders over its first year, giving your wrist a sound when youve been sitting around too long, editing a video in Veannes case.

I like the little remembers, she said. Im on deadline, Im giving at my table and theres a bit beep to take 200 gradations. I dont know how much healthier I am. I havent lost any weight, but I feel better. So, definite net positive on that front, as her aim to rapidly changed from 5,000 to 10, 000 paces a daylight in the week or so shes worn it.

Sleep tracking has been improved for most of Fitbits line, offering a more detailed judgment of various types of sleep grades, thanks in part to the inclusion of optical heart rate monitoring on the back. Veanne said the tracking seems primarily accurate, although it was sometimes misses her wake epoch as she doesnt immediately jolt out of berth in the morning,

Also, she generally doesnt find the whole sleep tracking concept as prompt as the fitness positions. The app is embarrassing and its a constant remember that Im not done enough sleep. A video creators work is never done.

Long-term fitness

The battery is, as predicted, fairly good. The company says itll get you a full week on a charge. Her ordeal was closer to six epoches still , not bad. You truly dont want to have to accuse the thing any more frequently than that, specially when youre supposed to wear the invention to sleep.

The touchscreen, meanwhile, can be a bit finicky, she said. I maintain having to find the sugared smudge to get it to drive. I care there was a button. Unlike the Bill, the Alta doesnt have any physical buttons, so when the touchscreen doesnt project great, thats a bit problematic.

Oh, and the Alta isnt waterproof a assignment we learned the hard way. It certainly ought to be a standard feature in wearables in 2017, in order to be allowed to swimming, rain or, as is the case with this sadly lost device, drop it in the toilet. Its not recommended, but you are familiar with, shit happens. Weve all “ve been there”, and its nothing a few cleans shouldnt cure.

We can work it out

So, all in all, a positive suffer. Were still hoping to raising the invention back to life, but maybe youll want to consider that $40 assurance. Its too worthwhile believing a less expensive device. The Fitbit Flex, for example, has much of the same functionality, without the heart rate observe or display, neither of which seem to be a transaction breaker for Veanne.

And then theres those insanely inexpensive wearables like Xiaomis Mi Band, which are rapidly deteriorating Fitbits marketshare on the low-end. Though Fitbit does volunteer one of “the worlds largest” polished objective to terminate fitness circle knowledge on the market presupposing you keep the lavatory lid down. Karma can be a real bummer.

The post A first-time wearables user refreshes the Fitbit Alta HR appeared first on apsbicepstraining.com.

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[infotainmentplus-blog]

What would it take to make a portless phone, and should we? Its time to face facts: the headphone jack is dying and its only a matter of time before the end comes. What then? What will fall next in the name of making phones thinner, lighter, and less expensive to make? How long will it be before we see a phone with no ports at all? What would it take to make a phone with no ports? Let’s find out. Most of the technology that we would need to make a truly porless phone exists today. There are some areas where we might need to gently massage the rules, but we’ll cross that bridge when we come to it. First let’s take a look at the ports we need to eliminate and go from there. Looking at my phone right now, I have a headphone jack, SIM/microSD tray, volume buttons, a power button, an extra button, speakers, and a charging port. All of these items represent a break in the chassis where water might leak through. Start from the top Let’s start with the easy ones. The volume buttons do not need to be there. Software can accommodate volume controls. Each individual app that uses sound can have a volume control, or you can put it into the system tray. You could also use capacitive keys for volume control. While we’re at it, you could use a capacitive key for all buttons including power as well. Buttons aren’t the problem. The headphone jack has been covered a lot, so let’s just get it out of the way. You don’t need a headphone jack on a phone. You should have one, but that’s a different editorial. I’m not an audiophile. My interests in this topic are more geared around practical concerns. Bluetooth accessories will be necessary. It sucks, but it’s not a complete loss. There are a couple of advancements in Bluetooth audio to consider – Sony’s LDAC and Qualcomm’s aptx HD. If you haven’t already read about these two codecs, you should. We have written up very detailed analyses of both of these concepts, linked above. The gist of it is that wireless audio, while still not perfect in terms of quality, is getting better and better. Android O will include both codecs in its core OS, which is a great step forward, and incidentally brings us closer to portless possibilities. Redux it A Bluetooth headset also solves the speaker problem – mostly. But there’s also a company based in the UK called Redux which is working on tech that turns your phone screen into a speaker. Sounds neat, right? It certainly has potential. The way the technology works is through the use of actuators that deliver haptic feedback through the screen. The same technology can be used to turn a phone screen into a loudspeaker. These screen speakers feature a wide range of frequencies. In theory, sound wouldn’t be compromized that much. To be honest, most phone speakers suck already, so Redux has a pretty low bar. One thing that Redux doesn’t solve is the lack of a microphone. To be honest, this editorial falls apart around that microphone port. After all, you need to be able to talk on your phone, right? Not to people, of course— don’t be silly. You talk to your assistant. Bluetooth, or some other tech would be necessary to get rid of the microphone port. Wiggle room Wireless charging has been around for just short of a decade, so we don’t need to worry about that charging port. However, charging ports are used for data as well, and data transfer is a sticking point. It’s possible a magnetic cable, not unlike what came with the HP Veer might be a data/charging cable. But let’s pretend I didn’t mention that mistake. There are wireless data transfer solutions available today, including cloud-based file storage. That’s what I use for pretty much everything. Alternatively, a protocol like wireless USB (made famous by the recent Essential phone) could work. Wireless USB offers data transfer that aren’t as fast as wired data transfer. The Essential phone’s wireless USB connection is capable of 6Gbps. There would have to be a compromise here, but a small one. With more and more of the world migrating to the cloud, it might just be a matter of time before we’re there though. ESIMs are an evolving tech that might help give us a portless phone one day. They’re basically a subscriber identity module that has been directly integrated into a phone’s processor or modem. This type of tech is improving every day and eSIMs can take different accounts from different carriers if need be. There are several advantages – no more fumbling with tiny plastic cards and no need to even visit a carrier store. The MicroSD tray could be solved by a removable back on the phone. I would argue that a removable back is not a port, but it is a technicality, granted. Realistically, you don’t need expandable storage, so the back of the phone could stay firmly in place. Again, that’s probably another editorial. But why? What would be the benefit of a portless phone? The obvious answer is water and dust proofing. That’s fine, except we have waterproof phones now with ports, so why is there a need to have no ports? Aesthetics are a reason. An unblemished phone would be a sight to behold. Imagine the lines on it— smooth and unbroken. Maybe it’s a Samsung phone with an infinity display. That would be pretty. But is pretty enough? It’s important to acknowledge that a portless phone would necessitate a pretty big lifestyle change for the average consumer. I’m not so sure it’s a lifestyle change they’d be willing to adopt. Some people use bluetooth headsets; some people use wireless charging. That doesn’t mean it’s for everyone. In this case, Im not so sure that a portless phone is worth the major change to people. People who read this site might see a portless phone and enjoy the novelty. Hell, you might even see it as a challenge. I would certainly be willing to try it out, but you can bet I would have a backup in place. What about you? Would you enjoy adopting a portless lifestyle? Would you rise to the challenge, or would you take a pass? Sound off below, and let me know what you think. , via Android Authority http://ift.tt/2AOk0wj

[apsbicepstraining]

A first-time wearables user refreshes the Fitbit Alta HR

Fitbit has eight different fitness trackers on the market right now. And while the companys financials are downright troubling, its still carrying more commodity that every other wearable corporation. Thats due in part to incredible refer identification, solid product design and mainstream entreaty. The company offers eight different tiers of products, but theyre all layout with everyone in mind.

The Alta HR falls somewhere in the middle. At $150, the cost isnt inconsequential, but its still cheap enough to be a populist machine. Its not designed with long distance runners or cross fit radicals in knowledge simply people who are looking for some help to step up their competition a little bit. Saunter more, stand up more frequently, maybe sleep a bit better and suck more water.

So we handed the device off to a first time wearable wearerer. By style of interpreting her fitness record, our producer Veanne told me a legend about how she and a sidekick are applied to stand outside the neighbourhood gym dining burritos within eyeshot of poor, sweaty treadmill runners.( I was in college she says in her protection ).

But karma caught up to me, she lent. Now Im in my 30 s, everything is lumpy. Im coughing going up two flights of stairs and it sucks. Im trying to take better care of myself.

So opportunity presented itself in the form of a salmon-colored Fitbit Alta HR review, a $150 piece of wearable engineering that she wouldnt going to go out of her channel to buy herself. But shes spent the last week wearing it around and largely enjoying the experience. Its not a love story, precisely, but its a unfold tie-in, even if its one that ultimately ended, as so many do, with one party swimming face down in the toilet.

Doesntquitefitbit

A Fitbit should fit. Its right there in the call. But the one-size-fits-all approach is an on-going issue with wearables in general. Some, of course, are worse offenders than others. The Galaxy S3 and LG Watch Sport immediately spring to mind. The bulky designs are fairly representative the male-centric approach many producers take with their devices.

Fitbits certainly more populist in its product design. The company is mainstream to a fault, and nothing in the companys cable comes anywhere near those smartwatches insane majority. The company offers strips up in different sizes as well, but the module itself is the same on both. At 54, our intrepid make is an inch shy of the average summit for the purposes of an American female, but still noticed the Alta a bit uncomfortably huge when she firstly tried it on.

Its a bit too big for me, she excused. I actually have to wear it backwards for it to fit, means that, in the week thats elapsed, shes worn the design with the spectacle facing down. When she needs to check notifications, she turns her wrist over. Not the end of the world, but not ideal.

Also, stylistically, its one of the nicer articles of hardware the company has raised. Though, as Veanne will merrily advise, simply dont get the salmon-colored one. I, too, can confirm that its not a great look.

Life coach

Wearability aside, Veanne told me that shes pretty well won over by the thing or at least the idea of having fitness trackers in general. And surely Fitbit offers one of the more shiny suffers in its category. The driving part there has been one of the key pleads of fitness trackers all along: motivation.

Theres the inherent incite influence of simply buying and wearing the thing, like tying a piece of string around your paw to remind you that really shouldnt precisely be sitting around the working day. Fitbits also improved its change reminders over its first year, giving your wrist a sound when youve been sitting around too long, editing a video in Veannes case.

I like the little remembers, she said. Im on deadline, Im giving at my table and theres a bit beep to take 200 gradations. I dont know how much healthier I am. I havent lost any weight, but I feel better. So, definite net positive on that front, as her aim to rapidly changed from 5,000 to 10, 000 paces a daylight in the week or so shes worn it.

Sleep tracking has been improved for most of Fitbits line, offering a more detailed judgment of various types of sleep grades, thanks in part to the inclusion of optical heart rate monitoring on the back. Veanne said the tracking seems primarily accurate, although it was sometimes misses her wake epoch as she doesnt immediately jolt out of berth in the morning,

Also, she generally doesnt find the whole sleep tracking concept as prompt as the fitness positions. The app is embarrassing and its a constant remember that Im not done enough sleep. A video creators work is never done.

Long-term fitness

The battery is, as predicted, fairly good. The company says itll get you a full week on a charge. Her ordeal was closer to six epoches still , not bad. You truly dont want to have to accuse the thing any more frequently than that, specially when youre supposed to wear the invention to sleep.

The touchscreen, meanwhile, can be a bit finicky, she said. I maintain having to find the sugared smudge to get it to drive. I care there was a button. Unlike the Bill, the Alta doesnt have any physical buttons, so when the touchscreen doesnt project great, thats a bit problematic.

Oh, and the Alta isnt waterproof a assignment we learned the hard way. It certainly ought to be a standard feature in wearables in 2017, in order to be allowed to swimming, rain or, as is the case with this sadly lost device, drop it in the toilet. Its not recommended, but you are familiar with, shit happens. Weve all “ve been there”, and its nothing a few cleans shouldnt cure.

We can work it out

So, all in all, a positive suffer. Were still hoping to raising the invention back to life, but maybe youll want to consider that $40 assurance. Its too worthwhile believing a less expensive device. The Fitbit Flex, for example, has much of the same functionality, without the heart rate observe or display, neither of which seem to be a transaction breaker for Veanne.

And then theres those insanely inexpensive wearables like Xiaomis Mi Band, which are rapidly deteriorating Fitbits marketshare on the low-end. Though Fitbit does volunteer one of “the worlds largest” polished objective to terminate fitness circle knowledge on the market presupposing you keep the lavatory lid down. Karma can be a real bummer.

The post A first-time wearables user refreshes the Fitbit Alta HR appeared first on apsbicepstraining.com.

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#IFTTT #WordPress

[apsbicepstraining]

A first-time wearables user refreshes the Fitbit Alta HR

Fitbit has eight different fitness trackers on the market right now. And while the companys financials are downright troubling, its still carrying more commodity that every other wearable corporation. Thats due in part to incredible refer identification, solid product design and mainstream entreaty. The company offers eight different tiers of products, but theyre all layout with everyone in mind.

The Alta HR falls somewhere in the middle. At $150, the cost isnt inconsequential, but its still cheap enough to be a populist machine. Its not designed with long distance runners or cross fit radicals in knowledge simply people who are looking for some help to step up their competition a little bit. Saunter more, stand up more frequently, maybe sleep a bit better and suck more water.

So we handed the device off to a first time wearable wearerer. By style of interpreting her fitness record, our producer Veanne told me a legend about how she and a sidekick are applied to stand outside the neighbourhood gym dining burritos within eyeshot of poor, sweaty treadmill runners.( I was in college she says in her protection ).

But karma caught up to me, she lent. Now Im in my 30 s, everything is lumpy. Im coughing going up two flights of stairs and it sucks. Im trying to take better care of myself.

So opportunity presented itself in the form of a salmon-colored Fitbit Alta HR review, a $150 piece of wearable engineering that she wouldnt going to go out of her channel to buy herself. But shes spent the last week wearing it around and largely enjoying the experience. Its not a love story, precisely, but its a unfold tie-in, even if its one that ultimately ended, as so many do, with one party swimming face down in the toilet.

Doesntquitefitbit

A Fitbit should fit. Its right there in the call. But the one-size-fits-all approach is an on-going issue with wearables in general. Some, of course, are worse offenders than others. The Galaxy S3 and LG Watch Sport immediately spring to mind. The bulky designs are fairly representative the male-centric approach many producers take with their devices.

Fitbits certainly more populist in its product design. The company is mainstream to a fault, and nothing in the companys cable comes anywhere near those smartwatches insane majority. The company offers strips up in different sizes as well, but the module itself is the same on both. At 54, our intrepid make is an inch shy of the average summit for the purposes of an American female, but still noticed the Alta a bit uncomfortably huge when she firstly tried it on.

Its a bit too big for me, she excused. I actually have to wear it backwards for it to fit, means that, in the week thats elapsed, shes worn the design with the spectacle facing down. When she needs to check notifications, she turns her wrist over. Not the end of the world, but not ideal.

Also, stylistically, its one of the nicer articles of hardware the company has raised. Though, as Veanne will merrily advise, simply dont get the salmon-colored one. I, too, can confirm that its not a great look.

Life coach

Wearability aside, Veanne told me that shes pretty well won over by the thing or at least the idea of having fitness trackers in general. And surely Fitbit offers one of the more shiny suffers in its category. The driving part there has been one of the key pleads of fitness trackers all along: motivation.

Theres the inherent incite influence of simply buying and wearing the thing, like tying a piece of string around your paw to remind you that really shouldnt precisely be sitting around the working day. Fitbits also improved its change reminders over its first year, giving your wrist a sound when youve been sitting around too long, editing a video in Veannes case.

I like the little remembers, she said. Im on deadline, Im giving at my table and theres a bit beep to take 200 gradations. I dont know how much healthier I am. I havent lost any weight, but I feel better. So, definite net positive on that front, as her aim to rapidly changed from 5,000 to 10, 000 paces a daylight in the week or so shes worn it.

Sleep tracking has been improved for most of Fitbits line, offering a more detailed judgment of various types of sleep grades, thanks in part to the inclusion of optical heart rate monitoring on the back. Veanne said the tracking seems primarily accurate, although it was sometimes misses her wake epoch as she doesnt immediately jolt out of berth in the morning,

Also, she generally doesnt find the whole sleep tracking concept as prompt as the fitness positions. The app is embarrassing and its a constant remember that Im not done enough sleep. A video creators work is never done.

Long-term fitness

The battery is, as predicted, fairly good. The company says itll get you a full week on a charge. Her ordeal was closer to six epoches still , not bad. You truly dont want to have to accuse the thing any more frequently than that, specially when youre supposed to wear the invention to sleep.

The touchscreen, meanwhile, can be a bit finicky, she said. I maintain having to find the sugared smudge to get it to drive. I care there was a button. Unlike the Bill, the Alta doesnt have any physical buttons, so when the touchscreen doesnt project great, thats a bit problematic.

Oh, and the Alta isnt waterproof a assignment we learned the hard way. It certainly ought to be a standard feature in wearables in 2017, in order to be allowed to swimming, rain or, as is the case with this sadly lost device, drop it in the toilet. Its not recommended, but you are familiar with, shit happens. Weve all “ve been there”, and its nothing a few cleans shouldnt cure.

We can work it out

So, all in all, a positive suffer. Were still hoping to raising the invention back to life, but maybe youll want to consider that $40 assurance. Its too worthwhile believing a less expensive device. The Fitbit Flex, for example, has much of the same functionality, without the heart rate observe or display, neither of which seem to be a transaction breaker for Veanne.

And then theres those insanely inexpensive wearables like Xiaomis Mi Band, which are rapidly deteriorating Fitbits marketshare on the low-end. Though Fitbit does volunteer one of “the worlds largest” polished objective to terminate fitness circle knowledge on the market presupposing you keep the lavatory lid down. Karma can be a real bummer.

The post A first-time wearables user refreshes the Fitbit Alta HR appeared first on apsbicepstraining.com.

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