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pharlooom · 6 years

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my opinions on cullen rutherford

over the past few days, I’ve gotten a some anonymous asks requesting me to explain what I think of cullen rutherford, because if you’ve noticed, I’ve been posting a lot of cullen content right now. I feel this is a great time to share my feelings about him and the Discourse around him, also what I think about various opinions this toxic, toxic fanbase has about him.

feel free to add, praise, disagree, or completely obliterate me for this in reblogs or replies. these are my opinions, some gotten from others, some crafted from my own readings and personal views. hate cullen or like him, say what you will, but if you respect my opinions, I will respect yours.

short version: I like cullen. I like his character. I genuinely appreciate his character growth and development and his change.

long version: from what I know and what I’ve read, this fandom likes to tear him to bits for a bunch of reasons, some of which are so vast and really heavy, I don’t know if I can go into them with enough knowledge of the lore. so it’s neat, I’ll state my opinion and then discuss it.

his abuse at the circle in dao explains his trauma, it doesn’t excuse his absolute shit treatment of mages

yep, I know the whole cullen “mages aren’t people” rutherford is only one of like 273 hearts of the #cullen critical community, but it’s the one people tend to address the most.

but his torture at ferelden’s circle doesn’t excuse his actions, it explains why he hates mages. I don’t know where cullen haters get the idea that the stans only use this as an excuse so their White Chantry Boy can be free to shit on mages wherever he pleases. no. he doesn’t have an excuse. he doesn’t have a get out of jail free card. in da2, his position of knight-captain and shitty treatment of mages is explained by the fact that he suffered a bad experience from them. you can’t just dismiss this. it’s an important part of his character as a whole and seeing haters say that “people use it as justification” is wrong.

and to stans who say that he’s free to hate mages because of this, stop that (though I haven’t seen this yet, I’m sure it’s happening somewhere).

he hates mages because he was traumatized by what happened in ferelden’s circle. that’s an explanation, not a justification. see? that isn’t the same as “it’s okay for him to hate mages because he was traumatized by what happened in ferelden’s circle.”

he was a shit person in da2

there is literally no saving him from this. I won’t come to his rescue or shield him from the criticism, he was terrible.

but, while I’m still on the subject, refer to the first opinion. I feel some people forget his abuse that happened in the prior game. so if you must hate him, hate him with his abuse in mind. hate him for the right reasons. hate that he was in a position to do something but didn’t, that “mages aren’t people” line. understand where he comes from, what he’s been through, then feel free to criticize him in the #cullen critical tag like a person with a clear and open mind.

he joined the templars because he wanted to help people

sometimes we forget that cullen joined the templars because he thought that at the age of thirteen, the templars were helping. this doesn’t excuse his actions later, but the very reason he joined the templars in the first place was because he wanted to help. he didn’t go into the order thinking “all mages r eveil.” when asked why he joined the order, he literally said: “I can think of no better calling than to protect those in need.”

and yes, I know that mages are coded (?) as oppressed people irl. but you have to understand that though they suffer the same oppression, mages and oppressed people irl are vastly different. irl, there’s less of a reason to stand with the oppressors because we’re all human beings with the same capabilities. in thedas, there really is a reason to be afraid of mages when they can literally raise the dead or summon fire at their fingertips. even if they can gain control of these abilities, they are dangerous. there’s a reason why circles had to be built. some circles are chill, and others are horribly abusive. still, you have to understand the validated fear behind thedas looking down on mages.

I don’t understand how him not acting on his affections on the warden or whatever is creepy???

I honest to goodness don’t get this. if you flirt with him too much, he even runs in the opposite direction. people have infatuations that can last for many years, sure, but it happens. people like people for a long time. and it’s not like hof is on his mind 24/7. all I can think of is when you ask him about how he knew her in dai, and that table banter with leliana where he asks about her, but that’s it??? that’s all I can think of??

I’m satisfied with his character development in dai

no, I don’t want him to apologize more than he already is. no, I don’t want the option to oust him from the inquisition. no, I don’t want the inquisitor to be given the option to shit on him, romance or not. no, I don’t want to give him all the ugly missions at the table because he’s an ugly adviser. no, I don’t want hawke or varric to call him out.

he’s growing, he’s changing. he realizes he’s a shit person, remembers all of the horrible things he’s done, and wants to better himself. I don’t give a shit about “how fast and ooc” it is for a character to change, I am all for positive character development. (I know this argument can and will be used against me. I have longer opinions about this positive character development deal, but for now, know I’m all for it.)

go back to dai and talk to him. just really listen to him. he isn’t even justifying his actions. he constantly says that all the shit he did is bad, scolding himself when he felt like he could have done better. and even when he’s explaining the events, like what happened at ferelden’s circle, he uses it to explain why he was an awful person in kirkwall.

I also see the argument that he distrusts the mages in inquisition, but I don’t see that. and even if he “does,” it’s out of concern for both mages and non-mages. not to mention that he’s left the templars, which has basically been his life for more than a decade, so it isn’t easy for him to just let go of it and instantly say “I trust mages with my life” because you really see the worst of what magic can do in the circles, and he’s been living in them for most of his life. I mean, just look at how hard it was for him to conquer his addiction, the very thing that chained him to the templars and the chantry. he isn’t hostile to any of the mages there, you don’t even see him scolding them or berating them (this only happens once, when he breaks apart an argument between a mage and templar at haven, and even then he also takes the time to scold the templar as well and say that this isn’t the place to do that). he doesn’t seem to mind the presence of vivienne or solas. hell, he plays chess with dorian. still sound like cullen “mages aren’t people” rutherford to you?

there’s a number of times he also says that he left the order because innocent people were getting caught in the crossfires between mages and templars. it was the exact opposite thing he wanted to prevent going into the order. he wanted people to be safe, and because of the templars, people ended up dying. it isn’t hard to understand why he left.

and he left. that’s a thing, by the way. he could have stayed and just accepted the fact that he wanted this life as a child, but he left the templars knowing full well that at that point, it had been his whole life. also, he left with the knowledge that leaving the order can be straight-up insanity or death due to lyrium withdrawal. he even talks about how dangerous it is for a templar to leave and how he wants a safer way to leave the order. I really feel that was the highest point of his character: he knew leaving the order (which was a huge part of his life) was difficult, could risk death, and had to suffer major effects from withdrawal. despite that, he still did it. at the ending of trespasser, he even helps other templars conquer their addiction. you may not like his character, but you can’t deny that’s still considerably noble.

and this is where it gets personal: I’ve done shitty things in my life. I’ve said some terrible stuff to people that I can’t take back, no matter how hard I want to. mentally, I’ve shunned and hated a whole community because they were attacking me in ways that destroyed me and my mental health, and I’ve held onto that grudge for so long. I wanted to change, I wanted to be a better person, not one consumed by hatred.

when I first played dai and talked to cullen about his opinions on mages and how he wanted to break free from the order, I bawled like a baby. I cried the whole way through the lyrium addiction mission. I saw myself in his character: somebody who did a fuckton of awful things in his past and wanted to get out of it. he inspired me to be braver, to be a better version of myself, that getting out of a cycle of hating yourself and other people is possible. you can change and it’s worth it.

and that’s why whenever I read cullen hate bashing his character development and how he should “apologize more” and how he’ll never be enough or never be forgiven, no matter how hard he tries to atone for it, it always gets to me. every time people hate his character, I feel like they’ll hate people like me, people who are bad and will always be bad and can’t improve ever because they were awful before, they’ll be awful forever.

TL;DR: cullen is an amazing character. his growth and backstory speaks volumes to me. I respect and look up to him in ways that this entire thing can’t do justice. while he’s done some terrible things in the past, he isn’t good, but he isn’t bad either. I admire him for what he is now, and how he’ll continue to grow in the lore to come.

again, this is only my opinion. you are free to disagree and agree at your own leisure. hate him, don’t hate him, whatever, I respect your opinion. you’re coming from a different point of view and I absolutely love that. all I ask is that you respect my opinion in return.

#cullen rutherford #but mostly #cullen positive #because majority of this is me liking his character #he's great and he's earned a spot in my heart #honestly you are free to hate him because i understand from where people hate him #i do get why he's a hate-able character #but at least let me say all of this #for my favorite character and for those who think he's a favorite as well #and also for my catharsis #it feels good to let that out #i've been bottling all of this for quite some time now #dragon age boyfriend #still is tho

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silentfcknhill · 6 years

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Coffin and pumpkin

pumpkin:

do you believe in ghosts?

I…..don’t know? I tend to be a pretty skeptical person when it comes to that kind of thing (I’m ‘agnostic’ and open/undecided when it comes to pretty much anything like that). Some days I lean more towards yes, and others no.

I don’t think it is possible for me to believe in anything, belief has always been a foreign concept for me, I need to know. I am open to proof completely and I even would say I hope that ghosts are real. Well, sort of. I don’t know what scares me more, the concept of existence after death or none.

If you would have asked me any longer than 7 years ago, I would have been able to say no more easily. Now, though, there is one thing that happened that I always think back to as the one reason why I can’t be so confidant that they don’t exist. I’ll explain it below as it relates to the next question. This is a long and complicated story, so brace yourself and buckle up.

coffin: have you ever had a paranormal experience?

I have had a lot of bizarre experiences. Paranormal? Probably not. probably more due to mental health issues I was experiencing particularly severely at the time. I have suffered from a lot of issues with lucid dreaming, night terrors, and worst of all sleep paralysis involving very frightening auditory and visual hypnogogic hallucinations.

They are not so often now, though, but for awhile they were quite bad and destroying my sleep entirely. There was one particular time that I will never forget, I woke up in sleep paralysis mode. It was dark in my room, still night, and I was sleeping on the top bunk of my bunk bed. I would have been 15-16 at the time.

I opened my eyes but was not able to move my body, and I was still projecting my dreams onto my bedroom environment because in sleep paralysis you are still not entirely awake and still dreaming a bit. There was a shadow figure standing on the bottom bunk and watching me on the top. Intense panic usually always happens with SP, but this was unlike any other time. I started hearing a voice whispering in my ear in a raspy and malicious tone, almost a buzzing, and I don’t remember what it said but very bad things about suicide and stuff.

Keep in mind, this was around the time, either slightly before or after I actually did try to kill myself and ended up in psych ward. I couldn’t make out distinct features on the being, just that is was very tall, skinny and sharp features like hands. I suddenly felt a pressure/tingling around my wrists (my arms were laying on on top of the other because I was sleeping on my side), and the creature began to start pulling me forward. Like, not my body, but my consciousness.

I could feel myself being drug out of my body, as though a demonic entity were trying to kidnap me and steal my body or something. This is also around the time I was experimenting with astral projection, and I heard heard horror stories about it happening later on after some research, but I didn’t know any of that prior to this experience.

I’ll never forget the actual physical sensations of being grabbed and dragged like that, it felt so real. I forget how the hallucination ended, I think I willed myself to move a finger or something and it pretty much immediately snaps you out of it, but let me tell you I was freaked the fuck out for a long time after that. Now let me explain that I was pretty much atheist at the time, so for me to be so afraid like that was strange.

I wouldn’t go to bed without reading a page from the bible, and I even drew a cross on my wrist to take with me and protect me in my dream world. I encountered this same creature shortly after once again, this time in a full dream not a hallucination, and I was able to destroy him with the cross. Now I know that this was likely not anything paranormal, but this is not the story I was referring to, just the backstory to provide context for the truly scary part.

For more context, I should explain that this apartment I was living in with my dad was one I had previously lived in back when I was from the ages of 1-4, and there were a lot of bad and traumatic memories there of abuse from my mother, so the whole place had a bad vibe. It was also located on a run down street downtown which was known for illegal activity, so it is very possible there were some negative people living there before, violent people, and someone could have even died in my bedroom.

This was also the place I was living when my mother, who suffered from postpartum depression after my birth, believed that demons were trying to convince her to molest me and throw me over the balcony when I was a baby. To be completely honest, I’m still not entirely sure she didn’t do the former, given our relationship that was inappropriate later on, but….my parents, especially her, were very religious and so I grew up with the fear of demons in me and that pretty much anything bad was the fault of demons, no depression from natural causes, just demons making it that way.

So I wasn’t comfortable there to begin with. Then, all the stuff I just said about SP happened. I was in a crumbling mental state at the time, in an abusive relationship long distance with a man in his 40′s when I was only 15, severely underweight, no longer sleeping well or eating or showering because of depression, self-harming multiple times a day with razors, and addicted to the internet to the point I would get panic attacks, and on the cusp of a mental breakdown that would come very shortly after.

But what happened next really fucked me up. For a period of a couple months or so, I was noticing small things would change from when I went to bed to when I woke up. Usually small stuff, like my alarm would be turned off when I left it on to wake up, the light being either on or off when I left it the opposite, same with the radio, fan and television, or the radio would be turned at a higher volume than I left it on. I would even get scratches and bruises on my arms while sleeping.

I didn’t think much of it to be honest because I had a lot of other things on my plate, it was just mildly unsettling but I kind of considered the fact that maybe I had been sleepwalking, as it has been known to happen in states of severe stress, insomnia, and also with the antipsychotic sedatives I was taking at the time to help me sleep and with anxiety. But that all changed.

One morning, I woke up and on top of all the other smaller changes, there was a bigger one. This is going to sound stupid as fuck, but it terrified me. There was a full can of soup next to my head, laying beside my pillow. It was not in my room before I went to sleep, it would have been in the kitchen cupboard. I briefly thought my dad was playing a prank on me until it hit me that I always keep my bedroom door locked, and it was still locked, which can only be done from the inside once the door is closed.

A crippling sense of dread hit me and I bolted the fuck out of there. I ran up to the attic, where my dad’s room was, and had a panic attack. He doesn’t really believe in that kind of thing, he’s religious but he usually doesn’t think ghosts are real, just angels and demons. He had to go to work, so I stayed alone up in the attic for that whole day, I was too terrified to go back downstairs and I spent the night on the phone so I didn’t feel so alone. From then on I felt a really negative and evil presence in that room. I would feel like I was being watched, or like I wasn’t safe.

In all honesty, if it wasn’t just me sleepwalking (which I find hard to believe it was, because I slept on the top bunk and I don’t think it would have been possible for someone who is asleep to climb down slippery metal bar ladder and back up without falling or tripping or something), i believe it was probably neither a ghost nor a demon, but a poltergeist. They are notorious for manifesting around teenagers, particularly girls, who are going through a very unstable and depressed time, as an embodiment of the negative energy. They mainly cause mischief, but can be frightening and occasionally get threatening.

At least, that’s how I felt at the time. I felt like the can of soup (it was a big can, full, unopened, heavy) was a power play against me, a way of saying ‘look what I can do, look how strong I’ve gotten’ and placing it beside my head was a warning of some sort, showing off how easily i could have had my skull crushed in my sleep. Even if it didn’t intend to do it, it wanted me scared and that’s exactly what it got.

So many negative things happened in that apartment, it’s where my dad and I both had severe separate mental breakdowns that we have still never recovered from, he has been unable to work since and I have had to live with damage to my brain from having serotonin syndrome by overdosing on pills to kill myself and getting seizures and stuff. We got evicted from that place after my dad got into a fight with his boss, who was also our landlord as he owned the restaurant downstairs of where we lived.

That room, despite everything, had such a hold on me, it didn’t want to let me go, it wanted me trapped there. I cried and begged to stay, but once I left I realized how crazy it was and how bad the atmosphere was there and I’m glad to be free. The place I live now has had no such issues.

Aside from that, I can think of a few bad experience with drugs that came pretty close to paranormal, at least in vibe, but were obviously not, back in my drug using days. Particularly acid. I will likely never recover from that and the issues with anxiety and existential panic it gave me. Though in hindsight doing hard drugs when you are autistic? Not a good idea.

Obviously there are logical explanations for all of this, some of them kind of a stretch, but still possible. I’m just saying it was enough to make me question and I never want to take any of that shit lightly or experience it again. I got asked once to do ouija, and I said FUCK NO. If that shit is real, you can guarantee it attaches itself to vulnerable people with mental health issues like me and it’s not worth the risk.

There’s some things we weren’t meant to know in this life, and exploring where you shouldn’t go will haunt you and you will never come back the same. it’s like the metaphor from the bible with adam and eve eating fruit from the forbidden tree of knowledge and having their paradise broken forever. Once you see these things, there’s no going back. Don’t be tempted. This all sounds like bullshit, but I’m dead serious and it’s so fucking scary. Sorry to be such a debbie downer but let this be a cautionary tale dude because it’s no joke. I always tell this to anyone wanting to get involved in lucid dreaming and astral projection, it can turn bad. It doesn’t always, but when it goes bad it goes really bad.

I’ve had entities react very poorly when they found out I was aware I was dreaming during a lucid dream, they would be disguised as someone I knew like my mom or a friend, and when I casually brought it up like ‘do you ever thunk about the fact that none of this is real?’ or something like that, they would transform into these static figures (like forms consisting of tv static, there mouths would open so wide and a hissing/screeching would come out) as though the matrix had just been broken or something and they were mad that I had found out they were trying to fool me. Needless to say, it makes being awake seem less real and makes me more paranoid. Freaky shit overall.

#jcmorrigan #asks #this got so dark i'm sorry #tw: suicide #tw: child abuse #tw: drugs

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the-record-columns · 5 years

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Dec. 26, 2018: Columns

Christmas cards don't always come in envelopes...

By KEN WELBORN

Record Publisher

In 2015, the folks who produce the program NASCAR Race Hub came by the offices of The Record and Thursday Printing to interview me about the 50th Anniversary Special they were doing on Tom Wolfe's 1965 story about Junior Johnson, "The Last American Hero."

They were well prepared and very tolerant of the fact that I wasn't at all happy that NASCAR had gotten greedy and taken away our race at the North Wilkesboro Speedway.

In the process of the interview, I was asked to speak to Tom Wolfe's comment that he had found the folks in Wilkes County to be "...standoffish."

I quickly replied that he could "...take his happy ass back up to New York where he was from, hang around there for a while, and then to call me about ‘standoffish’ folks.”

I then told the interviewer that if a person in Traphill answered the door at midnight with a shotgun in hand, that wasn't being standoffish—just cautious. That is one of the few comments I made during the 45-minute interview which they actually used.

To that end, I also assured the film crew that, if their van broke down in Wilkes, in less than five minutes, someone would stop and offer to help them.

And that brings me to this past Friday afternoon and Saturday morning.

I drive an old Chevy S-10 pickup, like 25 years old. It once belonged to the late Richie Feimster, a good worker, a great musician, and just an all-around decent guy who worked here at The Record and died suddenly—way too soon—at only 38 years old.

So this pickup is not just any an old S-10 pickup, it is a very special pickup, a truck with good karma, if you will. But, just like me and all things old, it does malfunction sometimes—like this past Friday afternoon.

It was a simple problem—the battery is old, and I must have left the switch on, because when I came out of the Pencare office supply store in Midtown Plaza, it wouldn't start. I stepped back into the store and asked if one of them could jump me off. Of course, they were glad to oblige and I went outside to raise the hood of my truck and get my jumper cables ready. In less than 30 seconds a car with a young couple inside pulled up and offered to help me start my truck. I assured them I had help coming around the corner and thanked them. After wishing me a cheery "Merry Christmas" the strangers drove away, having unwittingly validated my theory about Wilkes County people.

And then—on Saturday morning, the heater in the old S-10 quit working. This, too, had happened before. I had learned from Bucky Luttrell that I have some kind of water leak, and, by filling up the radiator, the heater works like new again. So, I pulled the pickup next to my building and raised the hood.

Now get this. BEFORE I could even turn on the faucet to fetch a pail of water (as the rhyme goes), a man driving down the alley stops to inquire what my breakdown might be, and how could he help me. Again, I was able to assure the Good Samaritan that this was a small, ongoing problem that I had the solution to, but I truly thanked him for his willingness to help.

Tom Wolfe died in May of this year, so I can't send him an email about the willingness of Wilkes County people to help someone else, even someone they don't know from Adam's house cat. I do, however, proudly use this space today to remind the readers of The Record that Christmas cards don't always come in envelopes, sometimes they come as good-hearted strangers.

(And, please, please forgive me, but while we are at it, I'll toss in a reminder that 4-Way Stop signs are an abomination of Satan himself, and do not belong in the South.)

Merry Christmas to all.

New Year changes

By LAURA WELBORN

Record Columnist

This time of year I always think of what I want to do differently the next year.

Last year I wanted to focus on being “mindful” and more intentional. Well I learned a lot and found some success and of course a lot of not so successful. Here are a few of my redefined goals: (with some help from Marc and ANgel Hack Life blog)

Warren Buffett once said, “What the human being is best at doing is interpreting all new information so that their prior conclusions remain intact.” Be willing to be wrong in 2019. Be willing to learn in 2019. Be mindful, humble and teachable every step of the way.

When you focus your heart and mind upon a purpose, and commit yourself to fulfill that purpose through small daily steps, positive energy floods into your life.

When things go wrong, learn what you can and then push the heartbreak aside by refocusing your energy on the present step. Remember that life’s best lessons are often learned at the worst times and from the worst mistakes.

When in doubt choose positive. If you want life to be happier, you need to be mindful of your present response. It’s how you deal with stress in each little moment that determines how well you achieve happiness in the end.

I consistently focus on troublesome thoughts but who would I be, and what else would I see, if I removed those thoughts? I hope to be intentional about spending more quality time with people who help me love myself more and let go of the paranoid failure thoughts.

I always want to exercise more, and since both of my dogs died last year I find I don’t even walk anymore. But I know if you don’t have your physical energy tuned up, then your mental energy (your focus), your emotional energy (your feelings), and your spiritual energy (your purpose) will all be negatively affected. Depression showed that consistent exercise combined with a healthy diet raises happiness levels just as much as Zoloft?

One of the things I have worked on is just not saying anything when I feel my words will just incite a negative response. Thus say less when less means more seems to be a better reaction. Sometimes, you are as wise as the silence you leave behind, because sometimes the right words aren’t words. If you cannot speak a kind word, say nothing at all. And if they cannot speak a kind word, say nothing at all. But just be kind!

Most people don’t deserve forgiveness- including ourselves but I find that with distance I can find forgiveness. Distance yourself, but don’t forget them; forgive them. Forgetting about the people who hurt you is your gift to them; forgiving the people who hurt you is your gift to yourself. You need to forgive others not because they deserve forgiveness at the moment, but because you deserve peace of mind going forward.

I have learned to trust the journey, even when I do not understand it. When people and circumstances close their doors on you, it’s a hint that your personal growth requires someone different and something more. Life is simply making room. So embrace your goodbyes, because every “goodbye” you receive in life sets you up for an important “hello.”

Start over again, and again. There’s a big difference between giving up and starting over in the right direction. And there are three little words that can release you from your past mistakes and regrets, and get you back on track in the year ahead. These words are: “From now on…”

While I don’t have a long list of successes this past year, I hope to focus on being in the moment and remember how I have touched lives with positive act and loving kindness.

The Road Less Traveled

By HEATHER DEAN

Record Reporter

You say it’s time to write about my new years resolutions??? So, yeah, about that...

Confession: I have an addiction to witty coffee mugs, the coffee that goes in them, intelligent conversation and books. Real books made of paper and glue. Everywhere I go in my travels I take at least one, and plan to come back with more. Some people take pictures as a reminder of the trip; I bring back a book about the region. Among my favorites are those in the transcendentalist movement- Ralph Waldo Emerson, Henry David Thoreau, Margaret Fuller, “Uncle Walt” Whitman, Robert Frost, William Wordsworth- as well as Tennyson, and Byron, and Oscar Wilde to name a few.

One major tenet of transcendentalism is that “man shall go against the main-stream choice, if the other is more pleasing to him.” The writers reflect ideals, intuition, and our ability to connect with untainted nature.

One of my oldest coffee mugs is extra large sized and holds three regular cups of coffee, it also has an excerpt from “The Road Not Taken”, by Robert Frost. “Two roads diverged in a wood, and I—. I took the one less traveled by, and that has made all the difference.”

This idea of a sporadic venture into the wilderness, and the societal realization that he undergoes while there, the whole “choose your own path” was something that spoke to me, even as a youngling.

I’ve always wondered what I would be when I grew up (still working on that), what kind of person I would become in later life, what life experiences would mold me, which memories will be the fleeting images I will see on my death bed and how people would remember me. (Sidebar: I do not plan on having any regrets while lying there, even though this past year has been the most trying and heartbreaking yet, complete with a brush against death.)

So, yeah, about that... It’s that time of year again: Everyone that follows the Roman calendar has made New Years resolutions, promises (they don’t intend to keep) to themselves to do better, be better, change bad habits, etc. etc. etc. So here’s the thing- “To thine own self be true” doesn’t mean anything if you don’t have the guts to take an honest look, and stand your ground against yourself. Just because you do good deeds at certain times of the year, does not make you a good person.

The only resolution I have ever cared to make, and keep, is “always take the road less traveled.” It gives me pause to reflect and therefore, perspective in the human condition, the good, the bad, and the ugly, and to learn from it. “And that my friend, makes all the difference.”

So go ahead, take a step in the direction of the transcendentalists.

Chose your own path, don’t go the same way as everyone else.

Just remember, that when people want to walk along side you- and many will- let them; regardless of whether they stay with you or not. However, make them carry their own baggage, no matter how fond you are of them. Because you, my darling human, are not responsible for anyone else’s resolutions, regrets, or life lessons, ever.

Headed for destruction?

By EARL COX

Special to The Record

As Israel’s Ambassador of Goodwill to Christians and Jews internationally, a distinction bestowed upon the Chief Rabbi of Effrat, Shlomo Riskin, and me several years ago by Israel’s Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu, I have the opportunity to meet many high profile people from prime ministers and other heads of state to store owners and people on the street. What I often hear expressed is a deep concern over the spread of terrorism and how this evil has changed life for us all by forcing the installation of extra security measures at airports, in schools, in hospitals and even in places of worship.

We are being challenged by those who do not embrace democracy, freedom of religion, human rights or the basic rule of law. Indeed, the world has changed dramatically since 9/11. Islamic ideology has infiltrated our communities and our university campuses. Its goal is to destroy the very fabric of freedom loving countries around the world and it’s doing its work from without as well as from within.

Every person who values freedom and democracy has a duty to stand against those sponsors of terror whose objective is to rid the world of infidels which means anyone who is not Muslim. Iran, for example, is the largest state sponsor of terror on the planet. Their militancy knows no bounds and their tentacles reach far beyond the Middle East. While most know that the terror organizations known as Hezbollah and Hamas are supported by Iran, few are aware that agents for this rogue nation are also actively engaged in various capacities right here in the United States. They have planted “students” on our college and university campuses to influence the hearts and minds of our youth with their insidious ideology and they have established nonprofit organizations in our communities giving out free medical care and other gifts of charity along with a healthy dose of Islamic teaching and influence.

While the future will always be uncertain, we can and must make fertile ground for freedom and democracy to flourish and we must bravely speak out in the face of all perpetrators of evil.

Nuclear weapons, cyber threats and domestic terrorism are not simply going to go away. These threats to freedom and democracy must be dealt with immediately. The longer we wait the deeper the roots. Positive change will only take place when civilized people recognize what is happening and take strong stands. Those we elect to public office must embrace the rule of law and the freedoms upon which this country was founded. We must use the media to send out truthful, fact-based messages concerning the dangers of Islam and we must be alert to what is happening across this country and around the world.

Silence is not an option in standing against terrorism. The only effective weapons are education and the ballot box. We must arm people with the truth and make certain those we elect to office know the truth. Those of us who value freedom and democracy can make a difference simply by using our voices to confront lies with the truth. Therefore we must make it our business to know fact from fiction and recognize attempts to manipulate in order to influence our understanding and opinions.

We have many tools at our disposal to share the truth when we encounter a lie. Media opportunities are unlimited such as writing commentaries for radio, television and print and social media which reaches millions of people. Billboards are another avenue to consider as is volunteering to speak to civic clubs and other organizations.

For over 20 years I have been writing for newspapers and magazines and broadcasting commentaries attempting to expose those who are set on destroying our democracy and freedoms. We all have an obligation to speak out against terrorism. To find the right platform requires only a little imagination.

Finally, I share a lesson I learned many years ago. There are those who complain about the world’s problems but do nothing to help make a difference. Then there are those who simply don’t care preferring to accept whatever happens. But then there are those who refuse to sit idly by. No matter the opposition they will get involved and fight for truth. They will speak out and do whatever it takes to make positive things happen. These are the people who are willing to stand on the front lines against terrorism and in defense of freedom and democracy to a world that has almost forgotten the meaning of these precious values.

As a Christian who believes in the God of Abraham Issac and Jacob, I am confident we still have a chance to save a world which seems headed for destruction.

Christmas in Greenwood

By CARL WHITE Life in the Carolina

When it comes to the Christmas and the Holiday Season in the Carolinas, we have an abundance of opportunities to join in the celebrations and traditions.

On a trip to Greenwood, S.C., I found myself amid the perfect time to officially launch the Christmas season. It was the first weekend of December and all things Christmas were coming alive.

I arrived Thursday evening after the sun had already gone down. As I made my way to the Inn on the Square, I traveled down Main Street that is lined with more than 50 Darlington Oaks that were planted along the path of the train tracks of yesteryear. For the Christmas Season, the tree trunks are meticulously wrapped with more than the 100,000 white lights. I later witnessed the excitement of a young child as he exclaimed “That feel like traveling through a magical light forest.”

Upon checking in at The Inn On The Square, I was greeted by a happy front desk clerk and a 15-foot nicely decorated traditional Christmas Tree. This giant tree was by no means lonely, as the Inn features nine additional unique trees decorated in grand holiday fashion.

If you are like me and enjoy the Christmas Season you are smiling now and will do so as this story progresses, however, if you are more of a Charles Dickens “Scrooge” type person, this story will give you many opportunities to say, “Bah Humbug!” That’s just fine with me, we all know what happens to you in the morning.

After a good night’s rest, Friday started off with a tasty breakfast and enjoyable visits throughout the day, I was very excited about the evening as it would start off with a grilled fish at the Carriage House and then a production of Miracle on 34th Street at the award-winning Greenwood Community Theatre.

I was especially excited to see the performance as Richard Whiting in the lead role as Kris Kringle. Over the years Richard has appeared in several roles, and he is an avid supporter of community theatre, and during most days he spends his hours as the Executive Editor of the Index-Journal.

The promotional photos of Richard in costume for the role set the hopes for a great performance. I’ve been a fan of the movie version from childhood, I watch it every year, and it’s become a tradition.

Richard’s performance was solid; his delivery as Kris Kringle and Santa Clause was entertaining and on script. Along with the entire cast they guided the audience on a nostalgic trip down memory lane. It was all I hoped it would be and I would have watched again if time had allowed.

Greenwoods official Christmas tree was set aglow Saturday evening. It was a well-attended festive event with hot chocolate, carriage rides, Santa and Mrs. Clause and the countdown to light the city tree.

I had a surprise treat during Sunday morning breakfast at the Inn. Santa and his wife were fellow diners. We had a delightful conversation about the holiday season and their enjoyment in visiting Greenwood. It seems as if the ration of good list vs. bad list leans heavily toward the good.

The Greenwood Christmas parade took place at 2:30 in the afternoon and lasted for approximately one hour and 15 minutes. Charlie Barrineau told me that around 10,000 folks attended. It was a nice parade everyone I talked with had a great time. I love our Carolina parades; they bring everyone out for a celebration of community. It’s that time when we get to see a lot of people on display who are doing their part to make our Carolinas a better place.

It was an excellent weekend and a fantastic start to the Christmas Season and well worth a repeat.

Carl White is the executive producer and host of the award-winning syndicated TV show Carl White’s Life In the Carolinas. The weekly show is now in its eighth year of syndication and can be seen in the Charlotte viewing market on WJZY Fox 46 Saturday’s at 12:00 noon. For more on the show, visit www.lifeinthecarolinas.com, You can email Carl White at [email protected].

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wordswithtori · 7 years

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Thoughts on “The Brief Wondrous Life of Oscar Wao.”

At the start of the novel, the audience is introduced to one of the main ideas throughout the story by the narrator who would later be named as Junior: the supposed curse that follows Oscar and his family (the fuku). However, personally, I don’t believe in the fuku that the author claims is the reason for Wao’s bad luck. What I do believe in is coincidences and the doings of life itself. The one quote on page five that says, “It’s perfectly fine if you don’t believe in these ‘superstitions.’ In fact, it’s better than fine-- it’s perfect. Because no matter what you believe, fukú believes in you,” was clever added because Diaz probably assumed that some of his readers would see it had to do with curses and simply close the book. That quote would serve to make the most readers interested again. Some (like me) would find it cheesy, but I still continued to read on and like it anyway. The writing style was fun and of lower diction, and is also full of sarcastic remarks and humor. The elements of history that were thrown into the mix, such as the references to the infamous Dominican dictator, Trujillo, made the book all the more interesting to history buffs like myself. However, some of the footnotes seemed to be unnecessarily long to the point where there was too much information that wasn’t very relevant to the story of Oscar. That said, they were interesting to read.

After learning about Oscar’s nerdiness, his knack for falling in love with girls who would never touch him, and his plain awful high school experience, the novel switches over to the point of view of his sister, Lola, in chapter two. This was an interesting and confusing turn at first because the title originally suggested that the story was about Oscar alone and his life. The story is in the second person again like it was in the preface for the first few pages, which, given that it’s about finding out her mother has breast cancer, adds an extra dose of emotion by making you think as if you were Lola and were finding out your own mother had cancer. the entire italicized passage from page 51 to page 54 was one of my favorites because it was so detailed, and as mentioned before, emotional. The rest of the chapter discusses Lola’s fight to lose the control of her mother by becoming goth and cutting her hair, and by running away with Aldo. As a side thought, i also noticed that Junot Diaz uses a lot of spanish words and phrases without translating them after so that was a bit difficult to understand at times.

The third chapter of the first act is all about Oscar and Lola’s mother, Beli. Beli lived a tough life by first going through the foster care system and enduring an abusive foster father and mother who had burned and scarred her by throwing a pot of hot oil at her, but that comes up in the proceeding chapter. Then, there was the situation with the gangster as well, forget the boyfriend, Jack Pujols, who used her and blamed her for having sexual relations in a closet in their high school. The gangster, who more or less did something similar to Beli in terms of using her for one thing and then disappearing, surprised us (kind of, he seems like the kind of guy who would have obviously be the married and cheating type) by of course being married. But, even if you did catch on to his marriage, it was an actual shock that he was married to Trujillo’s sister. If I were to ever believe in a curse, it was that moment right there that I would have believed in it, if only for a moment. This is the first time the symbolic mongoose is mentioned, as Beli is in the cane field severely beaten. It seems to be a symbol of good since she saw it before she was saved. My favorite passage from this chapter was on page 164 starting with “She is sixteen,” and ending with “her own heart.” It was very descriptive and telling of Beli’s character after all she had been through. As a side thought, i also noticed that Junot Diaz uses a lot of spanish words and phrases without translating them after so that was a bit difficult to understand at times.

In act two, Yunior comes back as the narrator again, but Oscar Wao is still not the focus. After two chapters about his mother and sister, I thought that it would be time for Oscar again. However, thinking back, it seems that the book wasn’t actually about him despite the title. It seemed more so to be about the fuku. This chapter is about Oscar’s rather popular surgeon grandfather and nurse grandmother. It delves a bit into the politics of the time of Trujillo, which is interesting, and about how you couldn’t so much as make a joke about the vicious dictator without being jailed, like the grandfather, Abelard. The curse is referenced again and again when talking about him, his wife, and three daughters (including Beli). Two of the three died, Jackie by drowning and Astrid by a stray bullet, which was thought to be part of the curse. At this point, the amount of bad luck the family encounters does at least partially convince me of the fuku.

The second chapter of the second act finally brings the readers back to Oscar. Ybon is also introduced after Oscar decides to go back to the Dominicans for the summer. I particularly like the passage about how Ybon isn’t the stereotypical prostitute because it shows that you don’t know everything about someone based on one aspect of his or her life. Ybon isn’t a “snort addicted mess,” and all the other things you would think. I also like how Diaz says he although he has mixed in a lot of sci-fi-and fantasy, the story is supposed to still be true. It is interesting to see how he sees the balance between true and false and is able to pick which parts allow for some fantasy. The way that Oscar’s beating by Grod and Grundy mirrored Beli’s beating earlier was intriguing and did make the curse seem like a more realistic thing.

The third act gives me the moment I’d been wondering about: Oscar’s death. It had been referenced many times throughout the book, and even in the title through the word “brief.” The mongoose symbol comes back, along with the man without the face that also accompanied Beli in her chapter. In class, it would be nice to discuss the faceless man and his part in the story. I interpreted him as the evil since the mongoose represents the good, but if I’m wrong then I’d like to understand. The part where Grod and Grundy offer to let Oscar go if he tells them what fuego means in english made so much sense for his character. Of course Oscar wouldn't be able to stop himself from saying it, despite knowing what would most likely ensue: a gunshot to the head.

In the final chapter, there are some elements of a happy ending. Yunior found out that Oscar had finally gotten together with Ybon. Even though he died, in the end I suppose you could say at least he got what he wanted in life. It is also good to me that Diaz decided to give a quick description of what happened to all the characters even after Oscar’s death to eliminate some of the curiosities that would have inevitably happened. At the same time, the ending was open-ended in a way because you wonder if Lola’s daughter will actually go to speak with Yunior about all that happened. Symbolism is used again through Yuniors post-Oscar death dreams with the blank pages, which was similar to one of Oscar’s prior dreams. There is also times in the dream when Oscar has no face like the faceless man Oscar and Beli saw before. The interpretation of the dream from Yunior that it meant he should write a book didn’t fully make sense to me, but I kind of get it now although I believe we should still discuss it.

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