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#also 3. i could have a baby by sperm donor and unless she had a dna test done like she wouldn’t know who was her half sibling which could
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Figured I might as well start actually posting about this Au I made- 
The au in question is a Star Wars modern au that I plan to one day turn into an actual fic, but as of now it's just one poorly put together chapter and a lot of brainstorming!
It's sort of a slice of life/everyone lives/happy ending story. It's centered around Boba Fett and started as a joke about his name and how in a modern setting when people first meet him they say 'Like the tea?' And he gets irrationally annoyed by it. Hence the name "No, Not The Tea" (but shortened to "Not The Tea" because removing 1 word suddenly makes it less of a mouthful)
But let's meet the characters, yeah?
The star of our show, Boba Fett, is 15 years old and the story starts with his first year of highschool.  He's grumpy (your typically moody teen) and the youngest of his brothers unless you count Din (14) and he does because he's tired of being the baby. (It does have its perks, though) Din isn't actually his brother, but he and the rest of their little rag tag group might aswell be family. (Peli 17, Fennec 16, and Cobb 15) 
Next up we have everyone's favorite dad, Jango Fett! (He's a very good father in this) Father of 3 boys(or so he thought) Kote "Cody" (23), Rex(19), and Boba, he has his hands full despite two of them being grown. He works as a bounty hunter (cause that's an actual profession) and his hobbies include annoying his family, and crushing on his kids history teacher. At the age of 18, he signed up to be a sperm donor unaware of just how much they would be using his DNA. Turns out? A lot. And the majority don't seem to have a good home life. He's sufficiently pissed, when he finds out. 
Coming in as the eldest child of the Fett household we have Cody! (That was until 17 and Fox showed up at least) Any legal document you find will say "Kote" but people are stupid and difficult and can't pronounce it (it's exceedingly simple, really) so Cody was born. Cody is a caffeine addict (though what Fett isn't?) and will jump at any opportunity to bother his younger brothers. (He once got Obi-Wan to buy Boba a boba-tea..Obi-Wan thought it was sweet! Boba almost committed a murder. They do not speak of that incident) 
The middle child that somehow became a father to twins before anybody else could even think of utter the words "grandchildren" would be Rex. It's not like it's his fault! He figured having his 8th period of his senior year would be fun. He didn't anticipate that helping his gym teacher out would involve talking a sophomore down from a panic attack. (Echo, 16 at the time. 17 when our story starts) It's absolutely not Rex's fault that he and his twin followed him around like little ducklings after that. (Fives called him dad as a joke, so Rex took it upon himself to tell Jango that he had grandkids and almost gave the man a heart attack.) It doesn't help the Echo and Fives look suspiciously like Boba- hey wait a minute! Yeah, you guessed it. Long lost kids^^ 
Alright speed round let's go,
Arla's kids are the Bad Batch boys(she adopted them, they have no relation to Jango. Hunter 21, Crosshair 20, Tech and Wrecker 19) Omega is 11 and her biological daughter. Her big brothers love her to death. 
Ahsoka is 19 and Rex's bff. 
Luke and Leia are also 11, and they're their parents (and Uncle Obi's, and auntie soka's) pride and joy. Anakin and Padme have basically adopted Han (15. Was in Boba's grade but got held back) as their own at this point. 
Wolffe is Cody's age, and the oldest of his brothers (Sinker, Boost, and Comet). They were put into the system (Yes, they came from Jango's DNA) and Plo Koon adopted them. When Jango and Plo first met they exchanged numbers and gushed about their children. (There is much more to that story but that's for a later post)
Ima-gun Di is an ex war general and currently married to Keeli. These two have absolutely NO role in the story whatsoever, I just love them. Jango has only met them once and it was because Ima-gun mistook Jango for Keeli at a grocery store once. 
Obi-Wan Kenobi is a tired, loving man who teaches history at a highschool and has a not so secret crush on one of his student's fathers. (He's actually taught all the Fett boy's, lord help him.)
Jaster Mereel just wants to know how his ad keeps ending up with kids. He was already confused where the first three came from but now there are 7??(Alpha-17. Oldest. Jango is more of a brother to him if anything. Fox, did not intend to be apart of this family in the slightest and that was fine up until he met Boba and they bonded. Now he's an Ori’vod?? Yeah that checks. Then of course Cody, Rex, Echo&Fives, and Boba.) Best grandfather ever.
Mando'a is a language, because I actually love it sm- 
There is so much more lore to this au than I realized, and this isn't even all of it. I fully plan on posting more, and I have a lot of art that I've done for it if I would ever get around to finishing it/posting it. Feel free to ask questions, and I hope to post more! 
(Fun fact, I accidentally deleted all of this the first time I type it. So this is the second time I've typed it- I'm not bitter.)
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teddykaczynski · 3 years
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i probably wont have kids even though i want them because the only two methods of reproduction im interested in are cloning myself and raising my clone as my daughter or my wife’s bone marrow and those arent currently options i could actually seek out
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Hi Comfy! 💜 Could you write some Tired Dad™ Jaskier, please? Ciri has been really difficult all day, crying because she misses her other daddy. Geralt made a business trip 3 days ago and will only be back at night.
Nonie i love this. I really hope i did your idea justice. I threw in as much fluff as I could!
just for clarification, ciri calls Jask “Fafa” and Geralt “Papa”, also I'm going with her being like 4? so only having a light grasp on language?
Warnings: none unless you don’t like specific dad nicknames? crying toddlers?
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Three days. 
It's not that long. It's not a big deal. Jaskier wasn't even worried about the logistics of Geralt being gone (other than Ciri being a morning baby), he was worried about missing his husband. So worried, in fact, that he forgot until night #1 that Ciri was going to miss him too. 
"Where's Papa?" She asked, holding one of her feet close to her face to examine the bruised toenail from when she dropped the birdbath on it last week. 
Jaskier gently tugged her leg back down so he could tuck her in, "He's working, cub. He went to help Uncle Skel." 
Her little brow furrowed just like Geralt's did when he was thinking. They were so much alike you'd think they'd used Geralt's sperm for the fertilization. How she got bright blonde hair and green eyes with Jaskier's DNA was a mystery, they were pretty sure the egg donor they chose had brown eyes too, but either way she was cute as could be. The one thing she absolutely got from Jaskier was how much she loved Geralt. 
"Papa will be home late?" 
Jaskier brushed the hair off of her forehead as he sat next to her on her brand new big girl bed, "Really late. He'll be gone two more nights." 
"But where will he sleep?!" 
"At Uncle Skel's house," Jaskier laughed. 
Ciri didn't think it was funny in the slightest, "But people sleep at home!" 
It was a good half hour before she accepted that, yes, Papa would sleep okay somewhere else, and no, that doesn't mean it's his home now. It was another half hour before Jaskier heard little snores coming from her room and could finally relax. Not that he slept much. The bed was cold and the constant reminder that he was gone just made him worry over his husband. 
Geralt called them early the next morning and Ciri was ecstatic, holding the phone up close to her face and cradling it reverently. She prattled on about a dream she had and nearly choked on her oatmeal because simply wouldn't stop talking. When Geralt finally said he had to go, she dragged out the 'i love you's and 'see you soon's as long as she could. 
As soon as Jaskier stuffed his phone in his pocket and turned to grab a paper towel, the toddler was in tears. 
She wailed as Jaskier pulled her out of her booster seat and cradled her to his shoulder, bouncing back and forth like he did when she was still bottle feeding, "I know Cub, I know. He'll be back soon. It's okay." 
"I want Papa!" She shrieked and cried some more, burying her face in Jaskier's sweater. 
"I know, darling. I miss him too." Jaskier tried not to be hurt by her little tirade, she was only four, she didn't mean anything by it, but it still stung. 
The days passed in a coffee-fueled blur, Jaskier doing his best to distract Ciri and avoid complete meltdowns. They went to the park, went for a ride on Roach (and even gave her a bath), went for bike rides, saw a movie, did two parent/child painting classes, and even baked a cake from scratch to fill the time. Jaskier thought he might fall asleep walking.
On the third night, Ciri crept into their room just as he was about to fall asleep, “Fafa?”
“Hmm?”
“I’m-” she was cut off by a yawn, “I’m not sleepy.”
Jaskier propped himself up on an elbow, “Do you want snuggles?”
She nodded and wiped at her nose. He pulled back the blankets and she scrambled onto the bed and up against his side, flinging one of her lanky little arms over his chest. He tucked her under his arm and made sure they were both pleasantly cocooned in the comforter. 
“Fafa?”
He resisted the urge to sigh, just wanting to drift off to sleep, “Yes, Ciri?”
“Do you miss Papa too?”
He looked down at her and frowned, “Of course I do, darling. I miss him even when he’s gone on a regular workday.”
She snuggled in closer and wrapped her little fist around his sleepshirt, “Why don’t you cry?”
He kissed the top of her head, “I don’t want to worry you, love. And I know he’s coming back.”
“Tomorrow?”
“Tomorrow.”
That’s how Geralt found them, snuggled up and both snoring softly as the morning light filtered through the curtains. 
He quietly set his luggage down and shrugged off his jacket before slipping into bed on Ciri’s side and pulling them both close. It was a few minutes still before either of them stirred, and even when Jaskier sleepily carded his fingers through Geralt’s hair he didn’t seem to notice till a few seconds later. 
A sweet smile spread across his face, still keeping his eyes closed, “You’re back.”
Geralt leaned over to kiss him, doing his best not to squish Ciri, “Did you miss me?”
“Immensely,” Jaskier sighed, going back to playing with Geralt’s hair, still not opening his eyes.
Their talking woke Ciri and before Geralt even had the chance to say ‘hello’ she was squealing and clinging to his neck for dear life. 
Geralt laughed and Jaskier just rolled his eyes fondly. “Hope you’re not tired, love.”
Geralt peeled Ciri off him to set her on his chest, “Good morning, princess. What do you want for breakfast?”
She bounced, punching the air out of Geralt’s lungs as she answered, “Pancakes!”
“Pancakes it is,” he roared, hoisting her above his head and rolling to sit up on the edge of the bed. He glanced back at Jaskier, “Coming, Fafa?”
Jask snuggled deeper under the blankets, “Call me when the coffee’s ready.”
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goldens0422 · 3 years
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Far Too Many Coincidences - Anidala Fanfic
It all started when she went to that fertility clinic, and she was able to choose which sperm donor she wanted to have as the biological father of her baby. The name Anakin Skywalker on one of them felt familiar, and not long after choosing him, she soon remembered that kid that she met on Tatooine when she still lived there, a nice coincidence. He had the biggest crush on her back then. Now, they’ve both grown up: At 27 years old, Anakin Skywalker owned a tech company and was a millionaire well on his way to becoming a billionaire, and at the other end of the spectrum, at 31 years old, Padmé Amidala owned a well-known law firm in the same state as Anakin ended up moving himself.
She met him soon enough by accident, the both of them meeting in a Starbucks which they were both coincidentally in at the same time as Padmé moved from one favorite coffee shop to another. They both knew at least a bit about how the other fared at life since media kept tabs on them as was the norm, and Padmé soon told him about her pregnancy and how she got pregnant, something only her immediate family knew back then, though she didn’t tell him he was the biological father just yet as he was conflicted in that category. The two then exchanged numbers in order to be able to further keep up with one another.
Coincidentally, the two only lived a few blocks away, with both of them residing in townhouses because Padmé was still rather frugal and Anakin wasn’t interested in sleeping in his headquarters nor buying a larger house before it really felt time to do so. Padmé also started working less, and this led Anakin to start visiting a lot to check on how things were going. She tells him often that he doesn’t need to worry so much, but at some point, she gave up, knowing he would still come back either way. Then again, she shouldn’t have tried getting him to leave anyway. She was comforted by his presence.
She would usually say to herself that she didn’t know why he kept coming back, but she knew. She knew it for the longest time. She swears it was already obvious since Day 1, and she had a feeling her reciprocation of his feelings were equally obvious.
She soon found out she was having twins, a boy and a girl, and coincidentally, Anakin came by the next day. The first person she broke the news to was him. Something tells her that propelled Anakin to come by even more often because that’s exactly what he did.
She even discussed the baby names with Anakin, even though he wasn’t even going to be the acting father (something struck in Padmé when she thought of that). They eventually came up with calling the boy Luke and the girl Leia.
She was deep into her pregnancy now, and she knew having twins (or having multiple babies for that matter) were likely to break her water earlier than expected. She was also very tempted to tell Anakin who the father really is.
They were finishing watching a romcom which Anakin recommended, and she loved it. In fact, she loved all the movies she and Anakin watched together, though she vaguely remembers spending a lot of the time looking at Anakin.
“So, did you like it?”, Anakin asked almost nervously.
“I did,” she smiled up at him. “Loved it.”
He narrowed his eyes as he held in a smile, “I don’t know, really. You didn’t cry while watching, so…”
She laughed, “Yeah, I guess I didn’t, but then again, maybe I am holding back all the crying for the big day.”
Anakin laughed himself, “I guess you are.”
She slowly nodded awkwardly, and there was a bit of silence.
“Can I ask you something?”
“Sure, go ahead.”
“You did say you got the two through a fertility clinic, right?”
“Yes,” she confirmed.
“Now, not that it matters so much, but may I just ask who the father is?”
Oh, wow, what a coincidence.
She turned to her bedside table and pulled open the drawer. The folder including a copy of information of the sperm donor was inside, and she pulled it out. There was a logo of the fertility clinic embossed on it. She handed it over to Anakin.
“Open it for yourself,” Padmé said.
Anakin opened it, and she could tell the exact moment he realized it.
There was a baby picture of him there along with a picture of him probably taken around 6 years ago, and basic information on him was provided.
He turned to her, suddenly treating this as a lot more important than he first stated, “M-me? I-I’m the donor you chose?”
“Y-y-yeah, you,” Padmé replied shyly, her cheeks warming up. “I just thought the baby pictures were cute, and I would’ve wanted my kids to look like that. You have…pretty good hair, too, and I want my kids to have good hair.”
Anakin blushed and rubbed the back of his head, his hand running through his thick, fluffy chocolate brown hair, “Thank you.”
Padmé smiled for a bit before she noticed something.
Yet another coincidence, she supposed.
“My water broke.”
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Anakin rushed Padmé to the hospital, and it wasn’t long before she was rushed to a room to eventually give birth.
Anakin was sat down next to her the entire time, and Padmé occasionally took a look at him, and as much as he wasn’t going to be one of those taking care of the children, he looked like a husband so nervous as he watched his wife push. It was almost as if he wanted to go through the pain himself so she didn’t have to go through it.
Eventually, the first baby came out, and it was the boy. A great many minutes later, the girl came out as well. By that point, she noticed Anakin was crying as well, though it was tears of joy. Padmé’s tears were tears of joy as well soon enough.
Anakin held the boy, and Padmé held the other.
“Any names yet?”, the doctor asked.
Padmé shook her head, “Not yet, could you give us a bit? We’re still kind of arguing over it.”
The doctor laughed before leaving them space, “Of course, well, I’ll be back in a bit.”
Anakin turned to her, confused, “I thought we decided on Luke and Leia?”
Padmé smiled once he said we. She had something in mind. It was profoundly stupid, but it was what she wanted, and it wouldn’t be any harder than raising twins alone, would it?
“Well, we didn’t have second names yet.”
“Oh,” Anakin slowly nodded. “Yeah, good point.”
“Any ideas?”
“Would Shmi for Leia and Jinn for Luke work? Those names are pretty important to me, so that’s why. I mean, they don’t matter so much because I’m not really going to be their acting dad. Well, that is unless you’d be willing to give me visitation rights, which still really isn’t that.”
She brushed off his last statements.
“Shmi and Jinn would work, yeah,” Padmé gave him a small smile.
Anakin smiled with a satisfied look on his face.
“Luke Jinn Amidala. Leia Shmi Amidala.”
Padmé shook her head, “Luke Jinn Amidala-Skywalker. Leia Shmi Amidala-Skywalker.”
His eyes widened, “W-what? B-but, I’m not their dad.”
“You are.”
“Well, biologically, yes, but I’m not gonna raise them.”
“That won’t be the case if you want to,” Padmé pursed her lips. “I-I-I know this is very stupid, but-but I-I love you, Anakin. In fact, I’m in love with you, and if you want to raise our babies with me, that would make me more than happy. It’ll be pretty tough at first, yes, but it honestly won’t be any harder than raising twins alone.”
She knew Anakin considered it. Without a doubt, it would be hard, especially in the early. After all, the two didn’t even live together, but as time would pass, it would become a whole lot easier, and she knew it. She also knew it would be very sudden. As much as Anakin had been acting like her twins’ dad throughout her entire pregnancy, she knew he didn’t consider legitimately being the dad.
Anakin eventually nodded, smiled, and kissed her, “I love you, too, and I’d love to be their dad. I can’t say I started the day thinking I’d even come close to being a dad nor come close to finding someone who loves me as I do her, but I also can’t say I’d say no to it.”
And, as Padmé Amidala-Skywalker looked at her now-family of 7 wonderful people, her and Anakin having 3 more kids after Luke and Leia, she couldn’t help but thank God for giving her the courage to make that stupid decision.
Though she still had to wonder how many coincidences it took to get there.
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roominthecastle · 5 years
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Could it be possible Liz became pregnant after she was exonerated (When Tom proposed and she replied with “I only know what I want now” after which they proceeded to sleep together on the boat)? or am I totally confused with the timeline (which is definitely possible as the majority of events in TBL leave me confused and lost and wandering in brain fog)
The short answer is no, it doesn’t work with that either, but I made a quick chart of the time period in question to help us navigate this mess of a topic in more detail. Maybe this will show why “Tom is the father” doesn’t fly based on human biology, logic, and the dates given in canon.
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“O”s mark Liz & Tom sexytimes, “X”s the most likely period of conception based on every available info, and the zigzag-y line btw 308–310 is the time Liz spends locked up (which means no access to pregnancy tests or male genitals).
The anchor points:
222: Liz meets with Velov | Liz and Tom have sex | Liz goes on the run with Red – this is WEEK 1, the manhunt begins
305: Liz has been a fugitive for the past 5 weeks (=35 days), news of her (faked) death emerge on Day 37 of the manhunt
308: Liz is captured by Ressler and is taken into custody – this is WEEK 12, the manhunt ends
310: Liz is exonerated and released from custody
(events in 308, 309, and 310 happen over a couple of days)
311: both Liz and Red state that they were on the run for 3 months (=12 weeks) | Liz and Tom have sex again | Liz gets attacked and is hospitalized where she learns she is pregnant
312: Liz tells Red about the pregnancy and that she bought a pregnancy test 3 weeks ago, then threw it out unused
316: Liz meets with Velov again, noting that their previous meeting took place about a year ago (if I calculate based on her pregnancy timeline, this second meeting takes place about 10 months after their first, which is within range for “about a year”, imo)
317: it is stated that Liz is now 8 months (=32 weeks) pregnant, which also gets confirmed in the following episode when she goes into labor prematurely
Relevant quotes:
- 311 -
LIZ: A week ago, I was facing 16 counts of capital murder.
LIZ: I’m sorry, wait. Are you giving me a case?RED: You look surprised.LIZ: I thought maybe after all we’ve been through the past three months that you might want to take a break. I mean, aren’t you exhausted?RED: Your past three months have been what my life has been like for the past 25 years. I’m often exhausted.
LIZ: We beat Berlin and the Cabal. Isn’t that enough for you? It is for me.
RED: It’s a mythic battle, and it’s not anywhere close to being over.LIZ: It’s your battle, not mine.
- 312 -
LIZ: I’m pregnant.RED: Yes. I’ve known for some time.LIZ: How?RED: Everything. Your body, your skin, a look in your eyes, different tastes for different foods, nausea, distracted, moody.LIZ: Yes. With everything that was happening, I just… I mean, I guess I knew, but I just couldn’t. I bought a pregnancy test three weeks ago, and I threw it out before I took it. I mean, I was okay facing the Cabal, but those two red lines. I just… could not handle that.
Additional information to keep in mind:
The way bruises heal can be dated based on their color changes. They take on a yellowish brown hue after about 10–14 days.
The earliest signs of pregnancy (nausea, moodiness, changes in appetite, etc.) appear by the time you are 6-8 weeks along.
So… Liz’s meetings with Velov give us a nice start and end point. She is about 8 months pregnant when she meets him the second time. She remarks that their first meeting took place about a year ago. This was also when she and Tom slept together, so unless the show is selling a 10-month-long pregnancy resulting in a premature baby, 1st boat sex is out.
After Liz goes on the run with Red, she and Tom get separated and don’t see each other until ep 307. It is, however, a brief meeting in a diner and no sex is involved. Liz gets captured by Ressler in 308 and she spends several days in custody. In 311 she says that a week ago she was still facing 16 counts of capital murder, so there is roughly a week between her getting captured in 308 and her returning to the Task Force in 311. 311 is the episode where she sleeps with Tom again, where she gets attacked and where the doctor in the hospital confirms that she is indeed pregnant. There is no significant time jump in this episode, so these scenes happen over a few days tops.
There is a bit of a time jump between 311 and 312, but based on Liz’s bruises, it’s not more than 2 weeks. In 312, Liz tells Red about the pregnancy and says that she bought a pregnancy test 3 weeks ago but threw it out. If we count back 3 weeks, it gets us to the period before she is captured by Ressler and that time period fits with how she describes the circumstances under which she bought the test: “with everything that was happening” and “I was ready to face the cabal” but not the positive result. After her exoneration, she considers the Cabal beaten and the rest of the fighting to be solely Red’s problem (see the relevant quotes above), so everything points towards her buying the test when she was still on the run with Red. The fact that she felt the need to buy a test suggests that she was already feeling the early symptoms of pregnancy - the same ones Red lists and claims to have noticed - which do not appear until 6-8 weeks after conception. If we count back 6-8 weeks, we land smack dab in the middle of the time period when Red was the only sperm donor who had “means, motive, and opportunity” to do the deed.
tl;dr: 1st boat sex would have meant that Liz was pregnant for ~10 months but she was only 8 months along when she gave birth. She bought the pregnancy test while still on the run with Red, and 2nd boat sex happened when she was already pregnant, so… ???? ;)
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justanoutlawfic · 5 years
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You’ll Be In My Heart: Chapt. 3
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Summary: Regina's always said she'd do anything to get her son back..but will that include marrying into the family she's despised for years?
Also on AO3
Regina had never been one for big white weddings. Her first had been a huge affair, mostly because of Cora and Daniel’s mother. She wore a dress that was carefully picked out and her father had practically drained his savings, all to give his little girl the wedding of her dreams…or his wife’s dreams. Sure, Regina wasn’t a brat about it. The wedding was beautiful and she knew she was blessed to have one so nice, she was especially lucky that her mother had blessed her marrying a teacher rather than a doctor or a lawyer like Cora had always dreamed for her. Still, it had been too hectic for her to enjoy. The dinner of salmon and fresh greens had looked delicious, but she barely had time to eat between the dances and thanking all the guests.
 Still, her second wedding wasn’t exactly what she had planned either.
 Robin had convinced her that the sooner they got everything done, the better. So, she had packed a bag that would last her until she could arrange with Mal to have her things shipped across the country and hastily typed an e-mail to her boss. She had worked at the muesem for 7 years and it felt so wrong to just up and leave with no notice, but she also knew it was her only shot at getting her son back.
 Regina didn’t consider what she was doing was crazy until she was halfway to California, sitting first class besides Robin, a man she barely knew. She hadn’t stopped to consider that this was all some big trick. Though, what sense would that be? Flying her out first class, just to say “Gotchya!” seemed too low, even for the Locksley family. The diamond weighing down her left ring finger was another sign that it was all very real.
 Still, she knew she could’ve thought it through more. If it had been for any other reason, maybe she would’ve. It was Henry, the son she hadn’t seen in 5 years. If there was even a small chance that she could get to see him for even five seconds, she’d do it.
 A part of her wondered if she should’ve called Daniel. He had been Henry’s father, after all. Sure, he hadn’t been as hands on as Regina, but he clearly loved that little boy and losing him had taken a toll. At the same time, Regina knew that there wasn’t a role in his life for Henry the way things were. Robin was his father, for all intents and purposes. Bringing Daniel along would just confuse things. Besides, he had remarried, used a sperm donor with his second wife to have a child of their own. Regina could never understand how he could do that. Up until Robin knocked on her door, she never pictured having another child.
 “Everyone grieves in different ways”, Regina remembered her therapist telling her when she had vented about it.
 Regina looked over at Robin, taking him in. If she had to pick a husband for looks, she’d be lying if she said he wasn’t a candidate. He was truly handsome, with dreamy blue eyes and a smile that was probably responsible for global warming. It was his personality she was still iffy about. He seemed a lot better than the rest of the Locksley family that she had interacted with, but at the same time, what did that really say?
 She didn’t pull herself out of her thoughts until they were landing in San Francisco. Robin had explained that he wanted to elope there and they could spend the night, before driving into Napa Valley the following day. She wanted more than anything to see Henry, but realized he was probably getting ready for bed, even with the time change factored in.
 “Feeling jet lagged?” Robin asked as they walked from baggage claim to the carpark.
“Not really. I traveled a lot in college, so I’m used to bigger time changes.”
“Anywhere fun?”
“Barcelona was probably my favorite, though Tokyo was beautiful.”
“I went there just last month for business.”
Regina tilted her head. “You travel often?”
“I try not to, with Henry and all. Ever since my dad got sick, the board’s been working to find a replacement for him but it’s not easy.”
“You have no interest in taking over the family business?”
“God, no. I mean, I love working for it. It’s great, but I could never be in charge.” He paused. “I looked into some museums, along with the local colleges. If you still want to work that is.”
Regina folded her arms over her chest. defensively “Why wouldn’t I want to work? It’s not like I’m doing this for your money.”
“I just figured you’d want to reunite with Henry for a bit first is all.”
 Regina frowned. Why did she always assume the worst?
 Because you don’t trust this family and for good reason, she thought to herself.
 “Even so, he’s in school. I’m sure I’ll want to look for a job, even if it’s just part time. I was a stay at home mom the first year, it’s just not for me.”
“I understand.” They approached a silver four door Audi and he removed his keys, clicking the unlock button. “I couldn’t do it either.”
Regina settled in on the leather seat, trying her best to become comfortable. “What’s he like…Henry?”
“Like I said earlier, he’s super smart. He’s reading at a 5th grade level, despite only being in 2nd grade, is doing math at a 3rd grader level and spelling tests…” He gave a flip of his hand as they pulled out of the carpark. “Never misses a word.”
 Regina squirmed in her seat, hoping her face wasn’t too green with envy. That should’ve been her singing Henry’s praises. Heaven knows she had done it enough when he was learning how to walk and the ABC song. She knew she couldn’t be bitter, she had 5 years to catch up on.
 “He has a kitten, Socks. Begged for one for over a year, finally figured he was responsible enough for one.”
“And how much work do you do?”
A smile tugged on Robin’s lips. “Just change the litterbox, he’ll feed him and refill his water.”
“Suppose that’s not the worst.”
“You’re not the one cleaning cat poop.”
“Not yet,” she corrected.
“Ah, yes. Someone to share the duties with. That’s a perk.” He glanced over at her before returning his eyes to the road. “I do have a housekeeper that comes 5 days a week.”
“You can get rid of her, I don’t mind cleaning and cooking.”
“It’s a big house. I’d want to keep her at least a few days. At least for the cleaning.”
Regina sighed, knowing it was best not to argue over that. “Who’s he staying with? A nanny?”
“No, my sister and her husband. They adore him.”
“Does he have a nanny?”
“Yes. She picks him up from school and watches him when I have meetings, but she’s been prepped for a decrease in her schedule. Ashley will work with you as needed. Same with our housekeeper, Johanna.”
“And your father?”
“Mary Margaret and David live with him at the estate, there’s also a fulltime nurse there to care for him. You won’t see him, unless you want to.”
“I think I’ve seen enough of Leopold Locksley to last me a lifetime.”
 Robin nodded, clearly not feeling the need to argue. Regina found herself a bit confused at that. She wasn’t exactly close with Cora, but outside her sister, she was the only one that was allowed to say anything about her. Every family was different, she supposed. Besides…she was about to become a Locksley, wasn’t she?
 Eventually, Robin pulled up in front of their hotel. He grabbed their bags from the trunk and lead them inside, checking them in.
 “I got us a suite, two bedrooms,” he explained.
Regina wanted to argue that it wasn’t worth the money, but then remembered who she was talking to. “Sounds nice.”
 As the bellman arrived to take their bags, they were approached by a tall man with thinning grey hair. Robin introduced him as the man that would be officiating them, a younger woman with him as a witness. They went into the business center of the hotel and were given the certificate. Robin signed it with ease, before handing the pen to Regina. It felt heavy in her hands, as she stared at the words in front of her.
 Just seven hours ago, she had been home, in cozy clothes. Now she stood in the business center of a nice hotel, with three strangers by her side and she was marrying one of them. Her mother didn’t know what she was doing, hell even her friends didn’t know. They were going to say that it was crazy.
 Regina’s mind flashed to Henry. The little boy she had been forced to give up, after loving for so long. The son that had never left her heart. Her mind floated to the blanket that was in her bag, the one the social worker had removed him from when she ripped him from Regina’s arms. Regina had slept with it for months, even long after it lost Henry’s scent. She had tried to replace it, but no amount of baby detergent did the trick.
 She had a chance of seeing that sweet baby again, and she was going to grab it by the throat.
 With a flourish, Regina signed her name to the certificate, legally binding her to Robin Locksley. She should’ve felt more nervous, but she also knew she hadn’t been more confident of anything in her life.
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cheetahsprints · 6 years
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Fest Fill #4
Prompt: Cisco finds out he’s pregnant while Harry’s gone. @heckyeahharrisco
Words: 1717
A/N: This takes place after Season 3/Sometime early season 4. 
Harry goes in last after everyone else has filed out. He can see signs of perspiration in Cisco’s face, though his hair has been pushed back. He holds close his tiny bundle, while Harry keeps a respectful distance.
Inside, he furiously resents whoever the mysterious impregnating individual is for not being here for Cisco. At least he has his friends.
Harry feels he’s somehow done something wrong. Cisco discovered his pregnancy apparently a few weeks after Harry left, however Cisco didn’t think to inform him. Not even after his inevitable return. Harry didn’t actually find out until Cisco was in labor.
To be fair, he should have realized. Cisco complained of various pains and constantly asked Harry to get him strawberry milkshakes. But he could still breach. Harry thought he wouldn’t be able to do that if he was pregnant. Turned out wrong.
Harry can’t resent him for it. He doesn’t blame him. He hasn’t always treated Cisco very well, and he regrets that. But he hadn’t known the brightness that Cisco was capable of shining into his dark recesses. 
He looks soft and bright post-birth. Gorgeous. 
Harry remarks, “Incredible. Isn’t it?”
Cisco grins proudly at the new life in his arm, lighting up his face and the room. It reminds him painfully of a similar scene in his life. It seems like yesterday, but also a lifetime ago. Cisco’s head lulls to the side, his eyes and expression drooping from his exhaustion.
Almost too quiet, Cisco unexpectedly utters, "HR."
"What?"
“He’s the...Er, sperm donor, more or less. Don’t pretend it wasn’t killing you inside."
"You had this sadness in your eyes - I thought he hurt you. But it was none of my business."
"But you wondered." It's not a question at all.
"Yes," Harry admits. He exhales slowly. "... How did you two get. Together? Was he... Good to you?"
"He - yes he was very - caring."
He doesn't understand how Cisco could overlook safety measures and get pregnant. He doesn't understand because he didn't think Cisco was fond of HR in that way.
Harry didn't know Cisco wanted to be with HR, he didn't know Cisco had slept with him. Harry supposes none of that is his business. They could’ve been trying on purpose for all he knows. And it wouldn’t have made being in love with Cisco any easier if he knew Cisco was taken.
He is insanely jealous that his doppelganger of all people had the privilege of experiencing that kind of intimacy with Cisco. But HR was sweet, kind-hearted, and earnest. Nothing like Harry. More deserving of Cisco than Harry.
Breaking through his bitter thoughts, Cisco asks, "Wanna hold him?"
Harry doesn't, but he carefully plucks the newborn from Cisco's chest. It isn't that he is against holding babies, even those half spawned by someone that he wishes he could’ve been. When Jesse was born, he had flat out refused to hold her right away. It's probably ridiculous, but he was afraid his tiny daughter would break.
Horacio Jonathan Ramon blinks up at him. He's adorable and unbearably small. Tears form in Harry’s eyes. His dusty memories rejoice at this special moment. Harry could swear he sees the Harrison Wells nose on him. It certainly doesn’t look like Cisco’s. He hopes the baby will get Cisco’s eyes. At least the color, if not the fascinating combination of innocence and wisdom held within their depths.
"Hi.”
He's in awe that this baby carries his DNA. That's the fact, even though he wasn't the one to plant the seed. For all intents and purposes, he’s technically holding his son -- Harrison Wells and Cisco Ramon combined. It’s a frightening and awesome prospect.
"You should see your face," Cisco remarks. He doesn't elaborate, and Harry doesn't want to know what his expression is betraying.
“To think I didn’t know you could get pregnant. How did everyone manage not to mention it for months?”
Harry must be fatigued too. He’s not sure what he’s trying to say. Thankfully, Cisco responds with a soft chuckle.
“Yeah... I have a uterus.... shocker. I’m more surprised that you managed to say nothing about my... obvious bun in the oven. Until my water broke...”
They had been eating Big Belly and having a movie marathon, nothing unusual. Then Cisco dropped a bombshell. All the air had gone from his lungs. He had asked quite stupidly, “You’re having a baby?!”
He can still clearly picture Cisco’s irritated expression. He muttered sarcastically, “Do you wanna talk about this now while I give birth on my couch?”
Cisco proceeded to have severe contractions and squeezed the blood out of Harry’s hand. It was a relief for both when Cisco could safely vibe, and Harry left him and his understandably nasty attitude to the doctor. He made it clear he wanted no other witnesses.
Harry couldn’t think properly or function while waiting for news. Iris had to sit him down and wrap his hands around a coffee-filled cup. Barry patted his back as though he was an anxious father again. Might as well have been, he worried for both their lives. 
It wasn’t that Harry had not considered that he was pregnant - it was that everyone seemed to dance around it. No one mentioned his apparent weight gain... or said anything that would’ve confirmed whether he was pregnant, or had just become rather (adorably) chubby. Harry didn’t examine it too closely. He thought it was inconsequential because either way did not affect his feelings. 
Whoever potentially knocked him up did not appear to be in the picture.
“I was... married. Prior to that, tact was an unknown for me. She’s the only reason I could - I would’ve ran Star Labs into the ground with my personality alone if she hadn’t ever been in my life. If had asked you if you were pregnant, but you weren’t? Awkward.”
Thinking logically, he realizes Cisco would’ve recovered. But Harry wasn’t willing to risk hurting his feelings, regardless of how it affected their relationship.
Cisco sits up, wincing a bit. “Wise teachings. I appreciate that I suppose.”
He starts to eat from the plate of food left by the bed. Harry sinks into a chair, content to hold the baby for now.
After he finishes eating, Harry can feel him staring and looks up. Cisco fidgets, turning a little red in cheeks.
"I didn't answer the other part of your question," Cisco says into the silence. Harry tilts his head, not following his train of thought. 
“About. How HR and I - how that happened,” Cisco clarifies.
"You don't have to." Harry was just being stupid and envious. Something suddenly occurs to him. "When you said to Lothario - that you haven't seen it - were you -"
"It wasn't a lie. When we... Lights off, pants down, nothing fancy."
Harry shakes his head in shock. Cisco deserves more than that, much more. He should have someone to care for him as Cisco would no doubt reciprocate, and to have every beautiful inch of him adored.  
"I'm not judging if that's what you wanted but -"
Cisco cuts him off. "It is. I approached HR and I -"
He squeezes his eyes shut and takes a deep breath. He appears to be preparing something Big. Harry waits. Cisco doesn’t meet his eyes. He twists the corner of the blanket with his hands.
"I asked him - I wanted him to pretend to be you. In bed. He was pretty good at it. But I couldn't - there were lines. That I kept. Things that I only wanted to share with the real you. He thought fair's fair, so there wasn't oral - or seeing anything unless absolutely necessary."
Tears have slipped down Cisco's cheeks while he spoke. Harry stands, careful not to jostle little Horacio. Somehow, he just can't see that name sticking though. Maybe ‘Johnny’ will end up suiting him instead. Not that it isn’t a fine name - he just has a weird hunch.
He hands Cisco's child back to him. Cisco looks at him tearfully.
"It was purely physical," Harry deadpans.
"Yeah. Surprisingly, he never offered or pushed for more. Sometimes I think there might have been more to it - that he wished I loved him - and I felt guilty. Ultimately, I came to terms with it being his choice. And I’ll never know for sure."
"You just wanted to have sex with. Me?" Harry needs the clarification out loud. He can already feel his heart breaking.
He might not have much self worth but he won't stoop to settling for Cisco's body and nothing else. He wants his love and affection, or bust. HR might have been able to do it, if he did possess romantic feelings for Cisco. But Harry can’t fathom making that kind of compromise with himself. It would burn him from the inside out eventually, destroy him.
"Well. Asking HR to pretend to date me as you seemed like a little much, and could potentially get awkward."
Harry can't believe his ears. Numbly he repeats, "Date?"
"Do I have to spell it out?"
Harry starts to answer when Horacio whimpers. Cisco rocks him and hums to him, soothing him down from a full blown cry. Harry's heart aches. Cisco is amazing at fatherhood already. And it's such a precious sight. He wishes he had a camera.
HR is gone, but Harry will give Cisco and his child all the love he can muster in his doppelganger’s place. He knows HR would’ve been over the moon. And while he’s never particularly liked him, he can honor his memory.
He loves Cisco's mind, his intelligence, his sense of humor, his big and wholesome heart. Perhaps someday... Cisco will love him back. 
"OK." Cisco turns to Harry once his son has calmed. "I'm in love with you. Easy enough, right?"
Harry is filled to the brim with unbridled joy at that statement. Such a laugh escapes him that he doesn’t immediately recognize the sound as his own. Cisco looks indignant for a second prior to Harry gently kissing him on the lips. 
“Get some rest,” Harry murmurs. He kisses Cisco’s forehead.
“You’ve earned it. I love you.”
He says the last three words to both of them.
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Ermanda’s Inner Sanctum: Scorpion 4.04 “Nuke Kids on the Block”
As much as I loved the end scenes, the episode copied the mission setup of 3.03 It Isn't The Fall That Kills You.  I love parallels and moments that recall past Scorpion jobs and tech to solve new problems or heartfelt character & ship developments (e.g., the “bored” Waige parallel to Quintis at the end of 3.15 Sharknerdo).  Given that season 4 is a reset of the series, I expect a revisit of various topics to show character development over the past 3 years, but unilateral copies are weird deja vu moments that spoil the magic of the series in my opinion.  The remaining elements of the episode were very enjoyable though because they led into the touching end scenes that I think sparked excitement for everyone in this fandom.  Let's get into the juicy bits! 
Sylvester Dodd, Esq. 
Sly is juggling his responsibilities as a Scorpion employee and Alderman of West Altadenia quite well since he uses his experience in one field to assist with another.  Now he plans to be Cabe’s defense!  Yay!  I am guessing he learned his lesson after Heywood Jahelpme Morris! 😂  Anyways, this is a great development because it serves as an extension of a father-son bond Sly and Cabe strengthened during Sly’s Alderman campaign last year.  With Patty Logan in the mix, this new arc will be comedic and touching!  Sly’s character development has really improved from previous seasons.  He gives an amazing speech to rally the team behind his goal to study and pass the bar exam in 2 DAYS!!!  All I can say is GO SLY GO!!! 
🎧 WE’RE ALL IN THIS TOGETHER - High School Musical cast🎧 
Waige
Ow my Waige!  Walter supports Happy’s presence because she could act as a buffer if he drones on and on about genius things.  He fears the same result will occur with Paige as his previous romantic interests.  He really wants this to work after the road it takes for him to get here!  And as she does best, Paige finds a unique way to accommodate Walter!  This scene takes me back to 2.15 Da Bomb, which is my all-time favorite Waige scene.  It reminds us how Paige is different from every other woman in Walter’s life whether she and Walter are on good terms or bad!  I love their new dynamic and I look forward to more cuteness from these cuties! 😍😍😍💙💙💙😍😍😍 
Baby Quintis
IT'S OFFICIAL!!!  Happy wants a baby ASAP!!!  EEK!!! 😃😃😃👨‍👩‍👧👶🏻🍼🤗🎉  Given the nature of the press release and the sneak peeks for the episode, the prevailing question amongst the fandom is why Happy wants to spend more time with Waige than her own husband.  When Toby realizes Happy’s behavior change is a psychological response to a strong emotional desire, he remains supportive.  He is not jealous because he knows how badly Happy wants a family of her own. 💚💚💚💚💚  
This is really great for everyone in the fandom who have wanted to see a pregnant Happy since the idea was teased in season 2B!  If you have been paying attention, you have noticed the foreshadowing elements that indicate the story's direction.  Since the writers teased this storyline at the end of season 3, I have tossed between the direction the writers would choose because of Toby's words to Happy in episode 3.07 We're Gonna Need A Bigger Vote.  But this current episode strongly suggests that Quintis' first child will be a bio baby in my opinion.  One of the biggest reasons why I am now convinced of this is because Quintis literally can not afford to adopt considering their current financial status.  Another is found in Happy's wardrobe, which is uniquely tied to all pregnancy mentions.  I forgot to mention this detail in my last review, but there was a significant wardrobe change, reflective of the looser and softer clothing of season 3A. The episode, along with 4.03 Grow A Deer, A Female Deer, also foreshadows how this new arc will unfold.  
Happy will carry a child.  She has stated that is what she wants.  Happy and Toby can not afford adoption.  However, TV is funny like that and could create a unique adoption scenario, if desired.  
Baby Quintis will be a girl.  The fawn from episode 4.03 was female (and spoiler alert: sneak peeks of the next episode reinforce this).  
Quintis will struggle with conception because nothing comes easy for these geniuses on this show, even in their personal lives.  The writers’ goal in season 3 was to explore how Happy and Toby would navigate a sudden life change given the stress of their current circumstances.  This season’s arc will likely test their resolve to develop their EQ and overall preparation for parenthood, teaching patience and perseverance. 
Happy will experience complications, but at which moment is unknown.  Her mother, Grace, died from childbirth complications, but this is not Happy's fate unless Jadyn Wong or CBS surprisingly decides not to renew her contract for another season, if ordered.  In addition, I do not think the story about the soldier's wife and her circulation problem and their infant is a coincidence.  
The baby will likely be a preemie.  The fawn was delivered prematurely and survived in episode 4.03.  If this baby is born at the end of the season with a pregnancy reveal between now and Christmas, then the length of the season without a significant time jump makes this a likely scenario.
These are factors I believe are inevitable.  However, these are very focused on Happy.  Where does Toby individually fit in this scenario besides being a sperm donor and supportive husband?  I go back to the conversation between Scotty and Toby in episode 3.24 Maroon 8.  Scotty's wife was prepared to give birth very soon and he was very concerned that the injury he sustained in the crash landing would cause him to miss the birth or never see either of them again.  Since there have been subtle clues about an impending struggle in Toby's personal life likely slated for the second half of the season, it might be possible that the writers play with an idea where Toby faces difficulty in reaching Happy for the birth of their child.  This is also likely considering Collins is still at large and we don't know what role he plays in the story later this season.  Yet, one could also argue that the comment Toby makes while he's dancing links to a future parallel with the "Shiny Happy People" moment of 2.13 White Out on a lighter note.  Baby Quintis is going to create a lot of character growth and influence a lot of other arcs for the season!  I am really excited about the possibilities!!! 
STOP WITH THE QUIEEN DRAMA!
If you are reading this title and think I am about to bash Quieen as a ship, then let me ✋🏾 you right there and say hello because you must be new to my blog and these reviews. 😉😂😂😂😂  This is more of a mini rant about the missed opportunities in a Happy and Paige friendship for the series.  I personally do not expect these two characters to have the same relationship that Happy has with Walter or that Paige has with Toby because their personalities are different and thus they will not naturally flock to one another as friends.  (Yes, I am aware of the irony of this statement considering Paige is in a relationship with Walter.)  The tension that exists between them in this episode is understandable given the circumstances.  At first, it didn't make sense why Happy would want to hang with Waige and Ralph out of the blue when the press release for the episode dropped.  The sneak peek revealing Paige and Walter's initial conversation before the mission suggested that Walter may have been behind this change given what we know about him as a character.  He does weird things when he is concerned about something.  Thus, he naturally defaults to experiments to test his hypotheses.  But throughout the episode we see that Happy's behavioral change is a result an inner emotional turmoil just as Walter's defense of Happy's presence on his dates with Paige suggests the same.  It's another unique Walter/Happy parallel showcasing their EQ struggles as the most robotic characters in the series.  The situation on a whole also links so well with Happy’s characterization.
Yet, the navigation of Waige's relationship presents opportunities for Paige to come to Happy to seek more insight about Walter since this show has established the strong Happy/Walter friendship and how they are very similar people.  Heck, Happy and Walter had the same walk when they entered the warhead hangar! 😂  The impending Quintis baby developments also create a chance for Happy to come to Paige for parenting advice like she did in 3.04 Little Boy Lost now that she wants to start a family.  She is inspired by the bond between Ralph and Waige and follows them to understand the scope of that connection.  Her focus on this is the reason why she is projecting her guilt over an accident leading to a catastrophic event and disappointment over being dismissed from the drive-in movie towards Paige and her EQ contributions to the team.  That frustration extends to a lesser extent to Toby and Cabe.  She is uncomfortable with the emotion, hence, she regresses.  However, the function of drama between Happy and Paige is annoying to use as a bonding tool in high stress situations when there is so much potential in their friendship without it.  As Toby states, Paige's work with Scorpion is a reason why he and Happy are married today.  Paige managed to piece together a last-minute wedding ceremony for them.  Happy gave Paige advice regarding Drew and Ralph from her own personal experience and even hilariously called out her jealousy towards Linda.  So all I'm saying is WHERE IS THE LOVE?!!  The drama is reflective of a common trope and societal fault that simply needs to dissolve.  The women of Scorpion do amazing things for this team and it is about time we see more SIGNIFICANT heartfelt moments between them!  My hope is we will eventually see a bond form from respective learning experiences because there is so much potential and new material that can blossom from a portrayal of this relationship on screen. 
Drabbles...
The lawyer interviews... 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂
So who is really Alderman? Sly or Patty? Patty is cracking me up because she is clearly running this ship! 😂😂😂😂😂😂
Ralph is so throwed and Paige doesn't like it... 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂💀💀 Geez guys, how did we get here already?! He was a little kid just the other day!
Walter is lucky Paige didn't hear his "I told you so!" He would have been in so much trouble! 😂😂😂
Paige and Happy are in full-on petty mode... 👀😱😱😱😳
How do you not have an explosion protocol even though the warhead is being decommissioned?! *facepalm*
Toby's moves to The Commodores are downright hilarious!!! 😂😂😂😂😂💀💀 I wonder if he plans on using those moves in the bedroom... #KinkyQuintis! At least Toby notices the danger before the others literally die from exhaust! Silver lining? 😂😂😂😂😂😂 He's such a dork!
Happy: Why do you want to be human anyway? Being human sucks! She's ruined all of us. Toby: Well... she is the reason we're together. That is a good thing, right?! (Happy remains silent). Aww Happy! My baby is all emotional and she is uncomfortable about it! 😢😢😢😢
Omgness! The way Walter closes the plug after Paige shoots down his definition of a fun date during catastrophe… 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂💀💀💀
H: The sign says, "No Swimming,” boss! 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂
Walter (to Happy & Paige): You two make a great team. Me: I agree! Why use a fight to get them here, writers?! We've been known this!
Explode the warhead?! Lordt, here we go again! 😳😳😱😱😱😱😱
Did anyone notice Happy’s subtle question of concern over the safety of the lighting guy given the new plan?! HOLY CHARACTER DEVELOPMENT!!! 🙌🏾 🙌🏾 🙌🏾
Okay Happy… don’t drop this plastic wrench! 😂😂😂😂😂
Paige and Happy make up and Walter is confused… this is the subtle comedy I like!!! 👍🏾😂😂😂😂
Cabe being treated as an intern is just too much! 😂😂😂😂😂😂 Cabe coming up with a method to locate the warhead based on the science the geniuses presented earlier… PRICELESS! He’s a great fit for this team as Toby suggests! Papa Cabe FTW!!! 🙌🏾😂😂😂😂😂
These geniuses are terribly direct at the worst times!!! 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂
Sly saves the county money and funds science club in one fell swoop! And he’s gonna be Cabe’s lawyer?! Oh yeah! 🙌🏾 🙌🏾 🙌🏾 🙌🏾
H: I want a baby... soon. You were right. I want a family... I’ve always wanted a family and I want one with you because I love you. T: The woman who hates being human wants to make another human? H: Yeah, something like that. T: Shall we start now? OH MY QUINTIS HEART!!! 😍😍💚💚💚😍😍 ALL HAIL THE MIGHTY LOVE OAK!!! 😍💚💚🌳💚💚
Waige is too stinkin cute! I am feeling 2.15 end scene flashbacks! Are you?!! 💙💙🐟🍹💙💙  Also cue the “bored” parallels between Waige in this episode and Quintis in episode 3.15.  Paige and Toby, respectively, remind their robot significant other that they will never get tired of their antics/personality!  GIVE ME ALL THE WAIGE AND QUINTIS PARALLELS!!! 🙌🏾 🙌🏾 🙌🏾😍😍😍😍😍😍💚💚💙💙
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thebookofmaev · 7 years
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Veep - Georgia
Curse having to get up at 6.30 for a work thing, KNOWING a new episode is RIGHT THERE and not being able to watch it. Though in someways, two hours media monitoring is good preparation for Veep.
1. That visual of Selina backing Jonah into a chair may be my favourite sight gag they have ever done - and bless Timothy Simmons for fully embracing Jonah’s terror.
2. Sperm donor. Called it. I’m not sure who’s making the worse decision here - after that meeting with Dan why Catherine and Marjorie would WANT his sperm, I can’t imagine. He might be good-looking, but his lack of soul may well be congenital. Combine that with the Meyer genes, and you have a recipe for disaster. (I’m not at all sure Dan should ever reproduce, but at least Amy’s DNA would dilute the hell-beastness a little). It will also link him to the Meyer-brand permanently in the public mind once it gets out - which it will. Maybe Catherine actually is as shallow as her mother, but I’d have thought Marjorie would know better.
3. The CBS interview. Argh. I have a very low tolerance for cringe comedy, so I watched it from behind my fingers. I really want them to stop humiliating Amy like this - it’s all so PUBLIC, and the way Dan is so clearly enjoying it made it worse - he hit her harder than he ever did Selina or Jonah. And there’s no way he doesn’t know what that’s doing to her. The contrast between the brutal way he kept pushing it and his warmth with her once the cameras were off is probably the most sociopathic Dan has ever come across to me. (Note, he’s still not a good interviewer - he cut across Amy too many times and made the interview very visibly about HIM and not the interviewee. To anyone watching he made himself LOOK like a jealous ex. In years to come, when he’s interviewed about his happy marriage with Amy or whatever, this clip will be shown). At least she got to call him DANNY - she got some retaliation.
I continue to be baffled by the writers not showing us ANY reaction from Dan to Amy’s engagement - why deny us that treat? His being that cool, calm and collected about it seems really out of character. Though he was clearly needling Buddy as much as possible throughout the segment. I actually do find it kind of funny that he felt the need to announce he’d got there first (though the “much younger woman” comment was pointlessly nasty) - it’s the same kind of childish possessiveness of her he’s displayed before. Also, given the way Amy’s spoken about their relationship, it did feel like he was giving it very undue prominence - it’s not like it was remotely serious, but he’s still very AWARE of his romantic link with her.
Though I suppose, now that I think of it, in Dan and Amy’s “will they-won’t they” relationship, all the doubt, and thus all the narrative tension, comes from his side. Amy might be shy and distrustful of him, but we’ve seen that that isn’t an insuperable obstacle to a relationship, if Dan could get his act together. The problem is him - and the moment he shows his true feelings, we all know how it will end - so structurally, they can’t do that yet. But if Amy potentially marrying someone else won’t wake him up, I don’t know what will. Unless they some day give her a love interest who’s just as handsome as Reid Scott - the actor who played Buddy is cute, but not stop you in the street good-looking, and Dan is so vain that maybe he’d only conceive of an equally handsome man as a ‘real’ threat.
Or maybe it’s that he could already tell it was never going to last, just from Amy’s demeanour. I don’t know - they’ve cut us off from a clear sense of Dan’s feelings for Amy for quite a while now, and it’s starting to make his behaviour…frustratingly opaque. (This isn’t a time issue by the way - it took them thirty seconds to show us how Dan felt about Ed in season two). Is he EVER going to be nice to her again - because right now I can’t imagine why she’d want to see him.
If they’re going to keep focusing on Amy’s love life like this, they need to reintroduce the possibility that things MIGHT end well for her - ever since things went wrong with Dan in Nevada everything in her life has been so bleak that…it feels pointless. If failure is the only option then there aren’t any stakes!
4. Buddy. Poor stupid Buddy. He basically took all the work Amy had done, all the public humiliation she’d endured on his behalf, and threw it away. I’m sure it’ll be played as Amy prioritising her career, but I don’t think that’s the whole story - Buddy just publicly demonstrated that he didn’t understand, at all, what Amy had done for him, or what it had cost her. She endured that interview with DAN - publicly - for god’s sake, and he unilaterally decides to make that pointless, AFTER THE FACT. Buddy had repeatedly demonstrated that he didn’t understand and wouldn’t prioritise what AMY wanted - their sex scene in the first episode really encapsulates their problems, and they don’t all come from her. But thank god she’ll be making her way back where she belongs soon.
5. Poor Jonah - all of the other congressmen laugh at him and call him names. They never let poor Jonah play in their prostitute games. I foresee a “Jonah Ryan is a Nazi” scandal in the near future. (As someone who is occasionally clumsy, I felt PROFOUND sympathy when he kept walking into all the things). His garbling of Selina’s insult was also kind of delicious.
6. Richard’s Tourist Hat. Bless him, that sweet precious lamb, may he never, never change. I don’t know why that dumb joke was the only one to make me laugh out loud, but apparently that’s the mood I’m in.
7. MIKE. It seems like forever since they’ve given Matt Walsh something to do that didn’t revolve around babies or farcical incompetence - which is a real waste, because I loved him in this episode. (Gary hugging Mike was genuinely sweet)
8. Minna being giddy and in love was kind of wonderful, even if my brain stutters to a halt when asked to picture Sally Phillips and Stephen Fry as a couple.
9. Selina got revenge on Doyle. Sure it was only a small thing, and hopefully there’ll be more to come, but just that small triumph made me grin. More please. (The full extent of his hatred for her feels a bit excessive given what happened between them - to quote Kent, vendettas take so much work!)
10. I loved Kent’s line about Hawaii. And seeing Selina have an ADULT conversation with him and Ben felt like a rush of oxygen.
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ranya-smut-blog · 7 years
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Married to Dr. Woods III
“Momma!”
“Hey baby, how was grandma’s house?”
“Really fun! I got to play with Abby and she makes yummy cookies!”
“That does sound fun, I missed you though” Anya tells her daughter sadly
“Aww momma don’t be sad, I missed you too” she says hugging Anya
“Mommy missed you too, she’s in the kitchen. Go say Hi”
“Okay” says the little girl and goes to look for her mommy.Raven was in the kitchen making lunch for them since Anya earned some time off because of solving the governor’s sickness. They planned on having a lot of family time and to surprise their daughter with the new puppy they had gotten.
“Hey sweetie! I’m glad you’re back, we got you a surprise” Raven tells her daughter
“Oh I wanna see! I wanna see!” The little girl replied excitingly while bouncing up and down on her heels
“He’s out back, c'mon”
She followed her mother outside and there she spotted the little golden retriever, not that she knew the breed or anything. For all she knew, there was a furry little dog in her backyard that she was aching to play with. She ran towards the animal and hugged him really tight.
“He’s so cute mommy! Can Abby come over and have a doggy play date with him?”
“We’ll have to ask your grandma and grandpa okay honey?”
“Okay, what’s the puppy’s name?”
“Your momma named him Odie”
Their daughter nodded her small head and called for her new pet. She chased after him and vise-versa. Raven laughed at their actions and soon was accompanied by Anya who held her wife from behind.
They had their daughter 6 years ago, a year after they got married. Raven was on her second year of being a music teacher and Anya was on her third year of medical school when she was conceived. Of course they had help from the sperm bank but they picked a donor that looked a lot like Anya.
They named her Kaia Reyes-Woods and she was the little girl version of Anya. She had the eyes, eyebrows, lips, and skin tone. She had Raven’s hair, appetite, and goofiness. She sometimes says their sarcastic remarks and they blames themselves for that.
When Kaia is with Ava, Clarke and Lexa’s daughter, they are disastrous.  They both are 6 so they had a lot in common and plus they’re growing up together. They had Logan, Octavia and Lincoln’s son but they ended up moving to New York. One of the pranks they did to their mothers was to replace their shampoos with a mixture of toothpaste and mouthwash to make it liquidy. They got in trouble so much that day but they both swore it was worth it.
“So I was thinking we wait for Clarke’s shift to end so Lexa, Ava, and her can accompany us to the fair tonight” The doctor told her wife
“Sounds good to me. Have you told Kaia?”
“No, I kinda want it to be a surprise”
“Well she’s going to be one happy child. A new puppy and a trip to the fair with her best friend and family? That’s the life” Raven says as she observes Odie jump on Kaia causing her fall
“Well yeah I mean she has pretty cool parents”
“I guess you can say we’re pretty dope” the brunette states as she reaches for her sunglasses that hung at the front of her shirt and puts them on
“I’m pretty dope, I don’t know about you” Anya jokes
She earned a slap to the arm from her wife, “Meanie”
“You love me”
“Unfortunately”
___
“Oh my gosh! Mommy can we get on the carousel?!” Kaia asks excitingly
“Anything you want baby, c'mon lets get in line” Raven tells the girls as they roll up their sleeves, ready to show their bracelets.
Some minutes later, both girls were on a white and black horse. Raven stood in between with a hand on each of their backs, just in case they’d fall or something. A mother could never be too protective, unless you’re a teen, that’s when it seems like they are.
“Who knew we’d have such a beautiful family” Lexa says
“I know, I still remember when you guys would always flirt in the high school hallways but neither of you made a move” Anya recalled
“Shutup, not my fault Clarke made me nervous”
“Excuses, you guys were such pussies”
“I mean you are what you eat so…” The dance teacher told the doctor who now had a disgusted look on her face
“Gross Lexa, I didn’t need to know what you two do every Friday night”
“Hey, you started it. You can only blame yourself”
“Whatever” Anya mumbled
“Hey babe, remember when Anya was so whipped back in college when she met Raven?” Clarke asked her wife
Lexa laughed, “oh yes, she literally left the dorms in the middle of the night to get Raven pizza because she was craving it”
“Where did you find a pizza at 2 in the morning?”
“The 24 hour diner down the road” Anya mumbled embarrassed
“That was goals. I know Clarke wouldn’t have done that for me” she said as she sent a small glare in her direction
“She was on her period, her hormones were everywhere” Anya tried to explain
“Who was on their period?” Raven asked with the two girls on her side
“No one” Her wife quickly replied earning a suspicious look from the brunette
“What’s a period aunt Anya?” Ava asked
“Something you’ll know later on”
“We already know. It’s a dot at the end of a sentence.” Kaia stated proudly
The adults smiled, “Look at that, you are really smart”
“I know, just like my momma” the little girl replied with much confidence
The smiley doctor crouched down to her daughter’s height and gave her a big kiss on the cheek. Raven whined since Kaia didn’t mention her too but then the little girl told her you too. Afterwards, Anya looked around the fair, trying to find a fun ride she could get on.
“Clarke! We have to get on the roller coaster” said Anya as she spotted the big ride
“Yes! I haven’t been on one in years”
Totally forgetting about their families, they sped walked to the ride. It was a race to them and their wives just shook their heads because they always acted like children when they were together. Even at the hospital when they got the lab results mixed up and told the wrong patient she was dying. The woman ended up selling her house, quitting her job, and breaking up with her boyfriend. When she heard that they had mistaken her, they were lucky she didn’t sue them. Of course Anya blamed Clatke and the doctor blamed the Anya.
After the ride, Clarke was feeling a little queazy. Lexa kept telling her it was her fault, she didn’t have to follow Anya everywhere. It seriously sounded like a mother scolding her daughter for doing everything their best friend did.
Then they decided to go get some cotton candy from a booth nearby.
“We’ll have 3 blue ones and 3 pink ones”
The little girls ate their cotton candy in excitement and shut their eyes as they enjoyed the sweet taste in their mouths.
“I can’t remember the last time I had this stuff” Anya spoke, “Probably because of all the glucose and fats in it” she continued
“You’re supposed to be on a break, stop talking all medical and enjoy the candy” Raven told her
Anya was about to reply but she received a phone call from the hospital.
“Hello?”
“Dr. Woods?!”
“Yes that’s me”
“We need you to come in, ASAP”
“What? Why? I’m on my break" Anya said as she raised her voice a bit. This made every one curious
“Yes we know, but we wouldn’t ask for you if it wasn’t an emergency”
“What’s the great emergency that I have to split my break in half?”
“There’s been a stomach flu epidemic in the hospital, it’s hit more than half of the staff and we don’t have enough healthy staff to attend them" the nurse explained quickly from the other side
“The stomach flu? That’s ridiculous. They don’t need escorts to the bathroom every time they have a bowel movement or if they have stomach cramps”
“It’s not just that Doctor, the effected are vomiting blood”
As Anya heard the word blood, she immediately knew it wasn't just the stomach flu. This was something more serious than that.
“Okay let me finish my cotton candy and win something for my wife and daughter. I’ll be there soon" then hung up
"What happened?” Raven asked
“Epidemic in the hospital, we have to go back in and help them. Then I have to figure out what’s wrong with them”
“What type of epidemic?”
“I’ll tell you in the car on the way there but first, where is the basketball booth? I’m ready to win some prizes”
___
After winning Raven and Kaia a couple stuffed animals, Anya was satisfied and apologized for having to go into work. She also told Kaia that she’d make it up to her and the little girl happily agreed and she told her momma that she understood that she had to go save people’s lives.
She was only 6 years old but she understood the importance of her mother’s job. At school she always boasted about her mom because she saved people from death. She also talked about her mommy because according to her, she was the next Beethoven. She only knew who he was because Raven would talk about him all the time to her. She was a pretty intelligent girl, I mean who wouldn’t be if your parents read music books and medicine books to you as an infant?
“Okay how many do we got so far?” Anya asked
“20 doctors, 45 patients, and 30 nurses”
“Make some phone calls and tell them we can’t be accepting any more people here. We’re not available until we figure out what this is” Anya ordered
“Yes doctor” the nurse nodded and headed back towards the nurse station
“What are you thinking Anya?” Clarke asks
“It’s something in the digestive or immune system. Let’s start with examining one of the patient’s, they will represent all 95 of them”
“Okay what should I run?”
“Imaging tests on the digestive system, then some blood work”
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technicolorthoughts · 4 years
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Welcome to My Brain: Episode II
Here's a post about my mother. She's... interesting. From what I've been told, she was always "normal" as a person. I use "normal" as a quoted word because I don't believe in normal, necessarily. I believe we all have our own definition of it, and I believe that none of us truly are. We are all different, have different stories, and therefore fit so many different bubbles. But back on topic, I've been told that she was always "normal". However, I have never experienced this. I have an old home video on VHS that shows my first year of life. In this video, there's a roughly 45 minute stretch where it's literally just my mother pushing me around on this early 1990's-era infant car thing for my entertainment. The very first time I saw this video, I sobbed. Literally sobbed. My mother was kind, caring, actually interested in her child, and there was no moment at all where a malicious or mean word was said. I honestly couldn't believe the video I was watching. Some of my earliest memories of my parents together are not happy ones where we're all laughing or playing. They're of my parents fighting and yelling. Mostly my mother towards my father. The words said I will never be able to tell you, I just know that she would yell and get in his face, purposely trying to anger him and press the buttons she could to trigger him. I would sit at my seat at the kitchen table, with my brother in the seat to my right, and she would start the argument directly across from me. There was nowhere to hide, unless I physically got up to hide. Instead, I sat and stared. I was somewhere between 4 and 6. My parents ended up getting a divorce in December of 1997. I was 6 years old. My mother had a house built for her earlier in the year, and she moved into it with my brother and I at the end of summer so we could start school. We lived there for a year and a half. After the first semester of my second grade year was over, we moved out of that house and into another one. After second grade was over, we moved again. Another school, another district. As a child, I never understood why or the logic behind all the moves, I just knew that mommy was moving, and so was I. Christmas break of my grade 3 year, during the time that was scheduled to be my father's visitation time, my mother took my brother and I and the three of us stayed in a halfway home (I guess, I'm not entirely sure what it was, but it seems like it was something similar). There were a lot of people there, but really no other children but us. How were we supposed to know that this wasn't right, or acceptable? Apparently she never answered phone calls and my dad had absolutely no idea where his children were. I cannot imagine the agony he felt in fear and worry for our lives during this time period. I hope I never have to. By the time summer came around in the year 2000, my brother and I were spending all of our time in a daycare while our mother worked. I remember it was a big building, it said Belle Tire on the side of it, and there was at least one ice rink in the building as well as the child care center that my brother and I were enrolled in. It was there that I learned to ice skate. One morning, my mother dropped us off like she always did before work. Left like all was normal, except our dad came to pick us up. Turns out, she had given up her custody in court and our dad was now our guardian. I guess in court she had told our dad, "If you want the kids, take them, I don't want them anymore." This was after three years of my dad fighting her for custody of us. She had given us nothing to prepare for the change. Thankfully, my dad always had the optimism that he would have custody and had clothing and bedroom furniture in a three bedroom mobile home already from the weekends and breaks of visitation that he was granted originally. Once the custody change was finished, my mother then had visitation rights. Every Wednesday, she could pick us up for dinner, every other weekend, and every other holiday (Mother's and Father's day with respective parents). Pretty usual stuff. Wednesdays ended real quick, she just stopped showing up for them after maybe 6 months. She would stop showing up on weekends as well. My dad kept a calendar specifically for the dates she was supposed to have us, and on every visitation that was hers, he'd write "no call, no show" for the ones she didn't take us for. Eventually, she told Friend of the Court that she was homeless, so she wasn't able to take us for an entire weekend. Every other Saturday from 9-4 was her timing, then. That's 14 hours a month if you take the entire time. Maybe 21, if there's a third Saturday. Even those were hit and miss. The second year I went to play soccer, my dad pulled me after the first game of the season because I had terrible asthma while playing, and the stupid hot day didn't help. The following Saturday that my mother had visitation, I didn't come out to the car ready for my game. She asked why, I told her I didn't play anymore because I have asthma. She proceeded to call me a liar to my face, and had intense anger over it. She took my brother and I to Lakeside Mall and made us run up and down the stairs (my guess to try and force an asthma attack out of me). When that didn't suit her fancy, her anger continued. She drove to a nearby restaurant and sat there with my brother and I and just yelled at us, with her verbal abuse and barrage of awful words. The couple at the booth next to us stayed the entire time. When my mother was finally done, the couple followed us out and the woman told her that she had half a mind to call CPS on my mother. I was too scared as an 11-year old to tell her to do it. Who knew how my mother would have reacted to that. Fast forward to the weekend of my 13th birthday. My mother had a little two bedroom condo at the time, so we were back to weekends. She was showing, mostly. She took my brother and I out for Italian (because our trailer trash father wouldn't have the class to take us somewhere that nice) and forced me to wear a blazer of hers because none of my clothes were "nice enough". My brother had to pick the "nicest" thing he brought with him for the public space. It was that weekend that my mother decided to tell me that I was a sperm donor baby. She belittled and berated my father and said that he was trailer trash, that he had no class, that he was a liar, a cheat, and a thief. She claimed he hit someone at work with a Hi-lo and was sent home, being investigated for also stealing tools from work and was lucky he wasn't fired for it. Then she said that my father wasn't my father and she had the medical records to prove it. I looked her in the eyes and said I didn't want to see them because she's a liar. The venom that was shot at me would have killed me if she could shoot lasers from her eyes. I went home that weekend to my dad and when he asked how the weekend was, I cried and told him what she had told me. He then had to sit me down and explain it to me, and the decisions that my parents made to cause the story to actually be true. The summer before my freshman year, my mother had since moved to Tennessee. When she moved, she didn't tell anyone. She had stopped showing for visitation, which was typical for her, but we hadn't expected that she would move halfway across the country to Arlington, Tennessee. That summer, my brother and I flew as unaccompanied minors to stay with her for 5 weeks. Those weeks were up and down. At one point, we talked about high school and the classes that I was taking. She was furious that I wasn't in college prep courses and stated that my father was a moron who couldn't put me in the right classes. Told me that if I wanted to stay with her in Tennessee, that she'd get me in the right classes and set me up for success. There was nothing wrong with the classes I was taking, they were all the classes that I was supposed to take as a Freshman in high school. She was freaking out over nothing. One time, my brother had commented about the upstairs loft area and how it could be made into a guest bedroom in my mother's house. She told him, "Why? I don't need that, I already have two." Those were the two bedrooms she had put together for my brother and I. During those 5 weeks, we called my dad in the middle of the week every week. I remember talking to him in a closet because I didn't want her to hear what I told him. Pretty sure I never said anything that would make her mad anyway, but the fear was there, so talking to my own father in a goddamn closet it was. My mother called us every Wednesday for a while. Sent a postcard from Tennessee here and there. That stopped before Christmas. Go figure. No contact there until my Junior year. Weekend of prom. I stayed the night at a friend's house afterward. My dad called early in the morning and told me he wanted me home. I figured he was being a party pooper. Turns out my mother had called the night before prom and said she was in Michigan with her fiance, and she wanted him to meet Andrew and me. MI my choice, I could tell her no. I decided to, because she's my mother. The next Friday, she picked us up. It was like a weird first double date with strangers. Don't remember his name, don't remember anything else about the night, just that it felt super awkward. I haven't talked to her since. I haven't called, e-mailed, written, nothing. She hasn't contacted me in any way, either. For a long time, I wondered what it was that I did that made her the way she was. I wondered what I could have done better to not be seen as worthless, useless, trailer trash garbage in her eyes. I wondered if that one class that I had gotten a B in could have been an A and therefore seen as good enough (even though every other class was an A). I wondered if I hadn't needed braces, if the attendance would have looked better to her. Then I realized, fuck her. There was nothing I could have done, because it wasn't my problem. It's all her problem. In her brain, nothing will ever be good enough. She will never be happy for that reason. I believe she has Narcissistic Personality Disorder. Her problem, she should figure that out herself. I had to work on myself for a number of years to realise that my mother is a toxic human who will abuse the shit out of anyone that will sit there and take it. I was always too scared to fight back, to call her out on her abuse and toxicity. Who knows, if she were to show up tomorrow, I may still be. But I know that I am more than that. I am worth more than that. And some days, that alone is enough to remind me that the struggles I face with my anxiety and mental health are worth it. Even just to show that if I can survive her and the shit that she put us through, I can handle a rough day. I can handle a rough week. I am a strong individual.
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thatcookingfat · 6 years
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Tainted Love (The Extension ... oooo errr missus!!)
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This meme explains how I've felt for the last few days! At least I can 'brain' again! I’ll try to explain! You know that feeling you get, when you try to think of a word, but the more you think about it the further away it gets? Mix into that, the feeling you get when you’re phone battery is down to 4%, you’re trying to get THAT thing finished, but the ‘low battery’ warning keeps flashing up, add a pinch of the hangover after a 3 day bender, light the touch paper and escape to a safe place!
Apologies for the last short post (I'm only 5ft tall). I'd rather 'cut my losses' than try to carry on and post a load of rubbish! But let me know what you think? Go on, let's get interactive, I don't bite ... unless I'm very hungry 😂😂
So when I abandoned you, I was encouraging everyone to get a 'Charlie' in their life, Dizzy had spat her dummy out, and Dotty was all by herself, on her own, with no-one with her!
Dizzy may have chosen not to speak to her family, but they still wanted to 'speak' to her! They tried calling around, but she'd slam the door on them; they'd phone her, but she'd slam the receiver back down again! Her slamming skills were becoming legendary; maybe she was the original ‘flouncer? I suppose her logic, by ignoring her family she was ignoring the truth, therefore she didn't have an eating disorder! ‘The Family’ only had one option left, lil ole Dotty!
For the first, but not the last, time, I was being used as a pawn. Suddenly my family were everywhere I was! I hadn't fallen out with them, so I was happily telling them about Mum's new friends, 'The Women's Group'. I told of our school holiday day trips and how Mum trusted me to look after the flat when she went out!!! I didn't know it was illegal, I thought I was grown up! I'd innocently lit the bomb fuse again! I was so thrilled when, that evening, not only Nan n Grandad but Auntie Jackie AND Uncle Steve were standing at the door when mum answered it. Before mum had time to slam the door, I had ran into Grandad's arms. I really seemed to have it in for her, didn't I?
Rather than the fun family night I had assumed, I was sent to my room so, 'The Grown Ups' could talk. Oh the injustice of it all! I hadn't seen my family in AGES and Mum was sending me to bed! I really did hate her at times! No matter how tightly I pressed my ear to the bedroom door, I couldn't hear what was being said. I would occasionally hear the raised tones of Grandad’s voice, or the piercing snap of Mum, but no actual words. Eventually, I gave up trying to earwig, my feet were numb with cold and my bladder was screaming with fullness. Reluctantly, I answered my bladders screams and snuggled up in bed. The heat of the electric blanket was just about to envelop me into slumber, when the living room door opened. I could hear the usual tones of chat and even a chuckle! Hearing normality, I sunk into a peaceful sleep.
The next morning the atmosphere was frosty to say the least! I made my way to school, knowing I was in for a bollocking when I got home! Now why is it, when you’re not looking forward to something, time flies by? It was ‘squeaky bum time’ when I got home! I hung my coat up, put my bag away, emptied my lunchbox ... basically anything to get me back in the good books. However, instead of the ranting and hiding I was expecting, I got silence; a sulky, speechless silence. It was scary! I tried to make conversation, but may as will been talking to the wall! I hesitantly put the TV on, not to watch, but to kill the deafening silence!
The silent treatment went of for a few days. The only interactions I had was when meals were placed in front of me and I asked to be ‘excused’ from the table. This was probably the worst punishment ever. I was walking on eggshells! I dreaded coming home from school, I knew at some point it was going to explode! But it didn’t! For once ‘The Sperm Donor’ did me a favour! He applied for custody of me! It forced Mum to speak to me. Obviously I didn’t want to live with him, I was scared of him, I’d seen his fists at work! But after the past few days, I did consider it, for a split second.
Armed with my reassurance, mum went to her solicitor to fight to the death! I had to be ‘interviewed’ by Hannah. i was told I had to be honest, I was, I just neglected to talk about mum’s silent treatment; thinking i was helping myself. Although I was interviewed, I never went to court.  He lost the case, however, he was awarded ‘access’. Every Saturday morning he would come to collect me, and we would walk to his sister’s house. Now Auntie Iris’s house was BORING! We sat there in awkward silence! Auntie Iris didn’t have a TV, I hadn’t brought my books and my cousins were out at work. The day dragged on ... and on ... and on ... you get the picture! The only excitement was when, on my return to the flat, World War 10000001 broke out!
Mum had had the audacity to answer the door in her ‘going out’ clothes (She was going ‘out out’)! It was like a red rag to a bull! Obviously I wasn’t privy to the conversation, but there were loud and angry voices! Our angel of a neighbour, on heating this, called the police and they persuaded him to ‘move on’ Which he did, until they had left! This became the regular pattern of behaviour and, as an adult, I have to ask where was the welfare of a child in this ludicrous situation? I’m not saying that because I’m something special, far from it! If the only reason ‘access’ had been granted was for the ‘benefit of the child’, where was the benefit of witnessing verbal abuse?  Verbal abuse cuts far deeper than any physical abuse and the wounds last a lifetime!
The Sperm Donor had won this round! Mum stopped going out on a Saturday night! Too stressed from the ‘handover’ battle, she was never in the right frame of mind to enjoy a night out with the girls. So she switched to going out on a Friday instead. Once ‘HE’ realised this, we were back to court, trying to change the day of access! He lost that round though! To add insult to injury, his latest court visit had upgraded the ‘Injunction’, it now had the magical ‘Power of Arrest’ on it. And they’d actually found a member of the justice team that realised this injunction meant he couldn’t come and pick me up or drop me off anymore! I was now taken into town, to a fast food ‘restaurant’.  I would sit there with Mum, he would walk in, Mum would walk out.  There was no contact between them.
Realising he couldn’t speak to mum, he started arriving before us! Mum would walk in with me, watch me get to his table and then leave! So his next tactic was to arrive back late with me, hoping for a confrontation. Mum didn’t respond, she just kept a log for her solicitor.Feeling powerless, he switched it up a ‘notch’! Instead of sitting in boring Auntie Iris’s house, he would take me to town and buy me things like make up! As an adult that seems pathetic, but I was 10 and make up was sooooo grown up! What he failed to consider was my skin!  
Way back in post one, I explained that I wasn’t the prettiest of babies! Bring ‘overcooked’ I’d had layers of dead skin.  That problem has followed me through life, not just the ugliness, but the flaky dry skin! Thanks to a defective skin gland, my skin would dry out to cracking point. So mum had always been VERY careful on products that same into contact with my skin. What did I care that my skin was beginning to resemble a baby's nappy rash, I looked beautiful with my face caked in make up and it hid the chronic eczema it caused! Mum was so harsh taking it off me! ‘He’ was right, she was jealous that he was buying things for me and not HER!
I’m ashamed to admit, he was turning my thinking around!  He’d managed to pick at the scab this divorce was causing, and infect it with his twisted ways. He was poisoning the love I had for mum, add to that the raging hormones that were now raging through my body, I was the ultimate prize bitch now! I was unaware that, being unable to come near the flat, he had his nephews following mum now! Mum could hardly accuse them of spying on her, they lived around the corner! 
When mum told me we were moving, I was so excited! We were moving to a house, with our own garden! What she failed to tell me was that, as a ‘managed move’ it was the other side of Coventry. The opposite side of the city to my friends and my family! I was also warned within an inch of my life, that I COULD NOT, tell him where we were moving to.  It was a secret. Shame that nobody in the courts knew this! Mum’s address was ‘redacted’ from any paperwork ... but mine wasn’t!! Please stop the head shaking and face palming ... It’s too bloody ridiculous to comprehend, isn’t it?
So I was now expected to catch 2 buses to school everyday and a bonus, 2 more to get home! It was deemed necessary that I remain at the same primary school, as I was in my last year.  Of course it was necessary to leave for school at 7.30am and not get home until 5pm. at least I was getting used to ‘working’ hours ... always a positive! I was now totally brainwashed! Mum was the enemy! She wouldn’t let him visit me at home, she wouldn’t let him phone me and she wouldn’t let me stay over at his new house! I really felt like I was a ‘victim’ ... Any Harry Enfield fans out there? I was the female ‘Kevin’. And by the time I started at secondary school, I was ‘Queen Kevin!’
Now in ‘Big School’ and a chip on my shoulder, out of the blue one night mum informed me I was going into care! Now where have we heard that before? So rejected by both parents, I was really feeling the lurve, NOT! As I sat there, stunned, Mum escaped upstairs! Desperate for the loo, i headed upstairs, but diverted to my bedroom as mum was already on the throne! All I heard was, “Going to pack your bags are you?” Well I wasn’t, as you know, but I thought, FUCK IT, why not! 
So I bundled a few things into a bag, stormed downstairs and did an award winning flounce as I slammed the door! Armed with my bus pass, I caught a bus into town. I didn’t know where I was going, I just knew I wasn’t going back THERE.
Apologies for the two part blog and thanks for sticking with me, if indeed you are!
Next time we’ll continue Dotty on her bus ride into the abyss and how she started a life long knack of picking the ‘wrongus’ (with a couple of exceptions)
Until next time, Dotty xxx
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