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#almost as much as i did portrait
moe-broey · 3 months
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HEARTBREAKING
Worst Dad You Know Has an Extremely Endearing (Now) Reoccurring Character Trait
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For further context: this whole FB involved Sharena and Henriette seeking out lockpickers in the Order of Heroes to open this VERY SECURELY locked box from Gustav's room that took Tina's special staff to finally crack open (or rather -- "steal" the contents out of. No one could actually break the lock!)
And the first instance of this!
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It makes me wonder if he saved anything related to Sharena..........
#fire emblem#feh#man. henriette's sad portrait w 'yes. he must have' carries so much bittersweet grief. augh#when it comes to sharena idk if i would be more angry if he did save something or if he didn't. i'm almost leaning towards the first though#like. idk if i can even word it but it fucking sucks when you have family that 'loves' you and they do actually genuinely love you#but they just. do it wrong. and fail you severely in the process. you think to yourself it would have been easier actually#if they had simply never loved you at all. or if they were upfront and told you they don't love you anymore.#at least then you can be as vindictive as you want and hold a grudge forever and be completely justified#but extremely begrudgingly this DOES make gustav a compelling character. in so many ways#you can see where it all went wrong. you can see henriette sees something in him that no one else can. and she's not crazy for it#she was probably there. she probably saw it all happen. she knows him w a level of intimacy no one else does.#and now you see these little humanizing traits. he loved his son. he loved his partner and wife.#juries still out on his daughter.#but you get what i'm saying right? it's terribly tragic. it's painful.#man.#i'm still gustav's number one hater though. just so we're clear.#AUGH IT'S JUST. THE PLAYFULNESS OF IT. IS ACTUALLY SO PAINFUL. LOOKING AT EVERYTHING WE KNOW#they had a rock competition........ to find the roundest rock.......... and she won....... and he saved the rock she found......#THAT'S. AAAAAAAAAAUUUUUUUUUUUGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH#you cannot fucking IMAGINE gustav doing that. and yet. in another time. he did. and that's who henriette fell in love with#and that's who herniette still sees. and she's not fucking wrong for it. not entirely. he still has that fucking rock.#dude i'm gonna be sick.#fe gustav#fe henriette#sharena#fe tina#fe alfonse#he's. mentioned. might as well tag him LMFAO
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sneez · 1 year
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various fairfaxes and a drawing from my english civil wars hiking au which i never posted :-) [id under cut]
[image description:
the first image is a digital drawing of a group of men on a light brown background. they are all wearing hiking-appropriate clothing. from left to right: a young man swinging from a tree; arrows pointing at him read ‘weirdly passionate about hiking’ and ‘like 15′. a man leaning against a tree; arrows read ‘grumpy’ and ‘only here for family bonding with father-in-law’. a man with a cane and one arm in a sling, leaning over to read a map; arrows read ‘has injured himself on every hike so far’ and ‘designated driver’. a man reading a map with a serious expression; arrows read ‘annoyed about everything except hiking and sometimes also hiking’ and ‘only one who can read a map’. a man with his hands on his hips looking at the viewer; arrows read ‘arranges hikes and then doesn’t go on them’ and ‘good at arguing’.
the second image is a collection of four digital drawings of thomas fairfax, a man with long dark hair, a moustache, and a beard. he is wearing seventeenth-century clothing. one is a full-body coloured drawing of him sitting in a chair facing away from the viewer with his legs folded and his hat on his knee. the other three are uncoloured: two are headshots of him as a young man and an older man, and the third shows him sitting at a table reading a piece of paper with an expression of concentration.
the third image is a coloured digital portrait of thomas fairfax as an older man. he is clean-shaven and has long dark hair and a scar across his cheek. he is wearing a dark doublet and a large white falling band, and is looking to the left of the image with a serious expression.
end image description.]
#artwork#fairfax#and others! theres a bunch of blokes in the hiking one#basically the concept is it's the english civil wars but instead of having a civil war they are rival hiking groups. and they compete with#each other over hiking trails and such. i never drew the royalist group but i was imagining them to be the Official hiking club and the#parliamentarian one started because there was drama in the royalist club so they started their own#and now theres drama between both of them. hiking drama.#ANYWAY thats from last year i cant remember why i never posted it but here it is now :-)#the other ones are much newer (for the most part) i did the coloured sitting fax yesterday#the last one is based on a portrait i came across recently which may or may not depict fairfax in 1664 (the identification is questionable)#and i still havent made my mind up whether or not i think it could be him or not but i was So excited about finding such a late portrait#i knew i had to draw at least something inspired by it. i cant even tell you how i excited i was i almost exploded#for context the latest portrait we have otherwise is from 1650 so if it is actually him it is a Very Big Deal#but i dont think we will ever know because the identification has been rejected by the metropolitan museum of art :-/ alas#of course it could be raised again in the future but i dont know if anyone would care enough to do that. i would obviously. but otherwise#oh for the first one from left to right it's lambert ireton fairfax cromwell pym#i dont know if the writing will be legible given how much tumblr crunches images but We Will See#i hope you are all doing well my dear friends :-) it has been so nice to get around to answering messages today i have missed you terribly#edited to add image descriptions! sorry i didnt do that earlier my apologies
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essektheylyss · 1 year
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these roots run real deep...
got really into painting fungus textures this week so I figured I'd do my wizard's (incomplete) family tree and uh, went a little overboard. it's fine it's what they deserve!
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ramblerogue · 1 year
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A Tiller drawing from about a year ago that I never finished. I’d love to get back into traditional work, pen/ink was always my fav :’)
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arctic-hands · 5 months
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Not a bad thing or a good thing but a neutral thing about being in contact and even friendly with my father again after years of estrangement is that I am once again confronted with the fact that we are too damn alike in a sense of humor and I think my mom has always been baffled by that and even moreso given that he and I had like 8 years of not talking to each other
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came0dust · 1 year
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shoutouts to games that have crossovers
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britneyshakespeare · 5 months
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I wanted to praise David Giles for giving David Gwillim the scar on his face after the Battle of Shrewsbury, that the real Henry V most definitely had from... well
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(x)
Because this is the only thing I find really interesting about the true historical Henry V to be honest. And not particularly the wound of it, either. Moreso the fact that he hid the wound and we'll never know what it really looked like. Because we have this miniature of him as a prince, presumably a likeness taken (if taken from life) while he was quite young
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And then as far as authentic images of him as King go, they're all taken from the side. Which was not conventional for portraits!
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But then whoever put the wound on Gwillim keeps moving it to appear on slightly different parts of his face. Lol. Well.
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azuremist · 10 months
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“Unfinished Painting” — Keith Haring
This painting was left intentionally incomplete. Haring began it when he was dying due to complications from AIDS, and knew he didn’t have much time left. The piece represents the incomplete lives of him and many others, lost to AIDS during the crisis.
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“AIDS Memorial Quilt” — Multiple
This quilt is over 50 tons heavy, and one of, if not the, largest pieces of community folk art. Many people who died of AIDS did not receive funerals, due to social stigma and many funeral homes refusing to handle the deceased’s remains, so this was one of the only ways their lives could be celebrated. Each panel was created in recognition of someone who died due to AIDS, typically by that person’s loved ones.
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“Untitled” (Portrait of Ross in L.A.) — Felix Gonzalez-Torres
This pile of candy weighs the same amount as Gonzalez-Torres’ partner, Ross Laycock, did. Ross Laycock had died due to AIDS-related complications earlier that same year. Visitors who see this piece are encouraged to take some of the candy. As they do so, the pile of candy weighs less and less, like how AIDS had deteriorated the body of Ross Laycock.
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The SF Gay Men's Chorus
This photo was taken in 1993. The men in white are the surviving original members. Every man in black is standing in for an original member who lost their lives to AIDS.
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“Electric Fan (Feel it Motherfuckers); Only Unclaimed Item from the Stephen Earabino Estate, 1997” — John Boskovich
After the death of his lover, Stephen Earabino, from AIDS, Boskovich discovered that his family had completely cleared his room, including Boskovich’s own possessions, save for this fan. An entire person, existence and relationship had been erased, just like so many lives during the AIDS crisis. Boskovich encased the fan in Plexiglass, but added cutouts so that its air may be felt by the viewer, almost like an exhalation. In a sense, restoring Earabino’s breath.
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“Blue” — Derek Jarman
This was Jarman’s final feature film, released four months before his death from AIDS-related complications. These complications had left him visually impaired, able to only see in shades of blue. This film consists of a single shot of a saturated blue color, as the soundtrack to the film described Jarman’s life through narration, intercut with the adventures of Blue, a humanization of the color blue. The film's final moments consist of a set of repeated names: “John. Daniel. Howard. Graham. Terry. Paul". These are the names of former lovers and friends of Jarman who had died due to AIDS.
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“Untitled” (Perfect Lovers) — Felix Gonzalez-Torres
Created by the same man who created the previous untitled piece, this piece was also inspired by his lover’s deterioration and death due to AIDS. This piece consists of two perfectly alike clocks. Over the course of time, one of the clocks will fall out of sync with the other.
In a letter written to his lover about the piece, before his lover’s passing, Gonzalez-Tourres wrote, “Don't be afraid of the clocks, they are our time, the time has been so generous to us. We imprinted time with the sweet taste of victory. We conquered fate by meeting at a certain time in a certain space. We are a product of the time, therefore we give back credit were it is due: time. We are synchronized, now forever. I love you.”
Please feel free to reblog with more additions
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alastor-simp · 3 months
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Alastor with a female reader who is selectively mute Part 1
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I always wanted to know how Alastor would react to a demon character like this or who is similar to Komi-san from Komi Can't communicate, so this is going to be my take on it.
**First Meeting**
Your arrival in hell wasn't a pleasant one. Literally the second you fell, you were approached by demons left and right, either trying to rob you or offering to sleep with you. Yelling at them would have been easy, but you were a very anxious person to the point you were mute with everyone you encountered. Surprisingly, you were able to run away from the unwanted problems you faced in hell, and was able to come across a flyer that was taped to one of the alley walls. "Come stay at the Happy Hotel" it read, and you figured that it might be a good place to stay for a while and try to make a sense of what you could do now that you were in hell. Having followed the map that was on the other side of the flyer, you were able to come across the hotel, but the neon sign was different then what the paper said, but you figured they probably were remodeling it.
The hotel was huge, it was plastered with neon signs, but also had a radio tower on one side, a large fish like contraption, and a pirate ship. "Amazing" you thought to yourself as you made your way closer to the door, and lightly knocked. A cheery voice was heard on the other side and soon the door opened to reveal a pretty, blonde girl. She had devilish features, but a very adorable baby face, and her smile was quite cute as well. "Oh! Hello! My name is Charlie Morningstar. How may I help you?", she said to you with big bright eyes, as she was patiently waiting for your response. Clenching your jaw, feelings of anxiety began to well up in your stomach, but you bared with it and simply held up the hotel poster in front of Charlie. Charlie was a little curious about your strange response, but she put the pieces together that you were wanting to stay at the hotel. "SQUEAL!! THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR COMING!", she said as she threw her arms around you in a bear hug, then letting you go as she pulled you into the hotel.
The inside of the hotel was nice, but needed some remodeling, but you liked it overall. Looking around, you noticed the other demons that were in the hotel. A mini demon was zipping around in a cute dress, cleaning the ceiling with a duster, a cat like demon was chugging a bottle of booze at the bar, and a very tall spider was standing next to the record player, picking out a song. Stopping what they were doing, they all turned to look at you, curiously. Nervous, you raised your hand at them, signifying a hello. The cat demon just nodded his head and continue chugging, while the fast demon zipped in front of you, waving back with a smile, before zooming away to finish cleaning. The tall spider gave you a wink, as they walked to the bar and took a seat. "Vaggie! We have another patron!" Charlie said, as she yelled out next to you, while also leading you to one of the lobby couches to have a seat. As Charlie walked away, your eyes began to scan around the hotel, taking in every detail, and also glancing at the portraits hanging on the wall with Charlie and what looked to be her parents.
"Why Hello there! Who might you be?", a static voice said, as you looked up to see a red suit man with a very sharp smile standing in front of you, leaning down to place his face closer to yours. He was dressed to the nines in a red striped coat, along with a monocle and bow-tie. He also appeared to be holding a microphone staff? Was he a singer by chance? Realizing you were getting distracted, you just nodded your head at the man, and pointed to the poster, similar to what you did with Charlie. The man raised an eyebrow, as he continued to lean closer, most likely waiting for your answer, as his smile got wider, almost breaking his face.
**Alastor POV**
Alastor's eyes continued to stare at the quiet demon, who was holding the poster and kept tapping against it frantically. Amused, Alastor leaned closer, while moving his staff to tap against her chin: "Something wrong my dear? Cat got your tongue?" Alastor watched as the demon remained silent, but he could tell by their eyes that they were nervous, oh how entertaining. "Oh Alastor! So nice of you to show up! This is our new patron who just arrived at the hotel", Alastor heard, as he turned to see Charlie smiling at him, while dragging Vaggie by the hand. Leaning back from his position, Alastor continued to gaze at you while turning back to Charlie. "Ah! So this wayward sinner is here to stay at the hotel! Excellent!" Alastor beamed, as he look down at you, while you shifted in your seat.
**Your POV**
You started to feel a little uncomfortable with everyone's eyes on you, making you clench your hands on your lap. You noticed the other demon next to Charlie. She had long grey hair, and only one of her eyes was showing. She did give you a hard gaze when she saw you, but it softened after few minutes. As she came closer to you, she waved her hand as a hello, while also asking what your name was. You stayed silent, as the butterflies in your stomach made you feel like you wanted to vomit, as everyone was watching you, waiting for your answer. "Whats the matter with you, toots? You deaf or something?", The spider demon had taken a seat next to you, while wrapping an arm around your neck with one of his arms, while poking your cheek with his other hand. Freezing up, you felt your eyes start to water, and you started to slightly shake. Charlie noticed your reactions and bent down on her knees to gaze at you, asking if you were alright. Taking a slow deep breath, you nodded then made a notion with your hands asking for something to write on. Charlie quickly got up and ran to the desk to grab a large notepad and pen, before coming back to you. Once you had the notepad, you began to write down what you wanted to say, before turning the notepad around for everyone to see, while giving them a shy smile:
"Hello my name is Y/N. I just arrived in Hell a few minutes ago and I saw your poster and wanted to stay here. I'm sorry for not responding to you guys normally, but I am selectively mute, I'm sorry again. Its very nice to meet all of you!"
Everyone around you slowly read the notepad and all turned back to look at you. Charlie and Vaggie looked very apologetic, the spider just shrugged his shoulders, the mini one just continued to smile at you, but more softly this time, and the cat demon just continued to drink from the bar. The man in red, or Alastor as they called him, continued to smile at you, seeming unfazed by what you wrote, but you noticed his eyes soften a bit, but he made sure to hide it from the others. "Oh! I'm sorry if we made you uncomfortable." Charlie began to bow her head, but you waved your hands, letting her know it was alright. Charlie raised her head, and soon her frown turned back into a bright smile: "Oh yes, let me introduce everyone! This is Vaggie, my girlfriend. The spider next to you is Angel Dust. Niffty is the small cute one. Husk is the one at the bar, and this is Alastor." You listened to all of the names Charlie said, and looked at everyone, while smiling and nodding your head. Angel Dust smirked while looking at you, turning you head to look at him: "You're quite a cutie aren't ya? I bet your voice sounds very sexy." Angel continued to wrap his arms around you, continuing to flirt with you, until Alastor's staff smacked him on the head. "Now my good fellow! It's not proper to talk that way to a lady! Please kindly remove yourself from them!" Alastor said, as he gazed at Angel, smiling still, but it looked more menacing this time. Angel let you go, while rubbing his head: "Satan F*** Al! You didn't have to hit me with that thing!" Vaggie then yelled at them both to be quiet, as she walked over to front desk and grabbed what looked like to be a room key. She walked back and handed it to you, telling you that your room is on the fourth floor and you can go up there and get settled. Nodding your head as a thank you, you began to walk over to one of the elevators and made your way to your room.
Arriving in your room, you scanned around the interior. The room had some dust and cobwebs, but a little cleaning would help with that. The room was decorated in a maroon red, with a large bed with black sheets, two large windows with curtains, a bathroom and a very wide closet. It almost felt like you got the home suite, which made you feel guilty as you really didn't need a extravagant room like this. Still in thought, you were alerted by a rhythmic knock on your door. Walking over, you looked in the peephole to see Al standing there with his big smile. Opening the door, you nodded your head at Alastor, as he smiled down at you. "Hello again my dear! I was wondering if you had time to chat!"
***Alastor POV***
The quiet sinner nodded her head at Al, while opening the door, allowing me to come in. How adorable! He thought, while making his over to the center of the room and turning back to look at them. "Now my dear! I am here wanting to apologize for how I acted in the lobby! I wasn't behaving like a proper gentleman and I understand if I made you uncomfortable, so let me offer you my sincerest apologies! Let's start over from the beginning, shall we?" Alastor bowed his head a bit, as a sign of him apologizing, and extending his hand out in a handshake. You appeared taken aback in Alastor's eyes, ,but you gave him a soft smile and shook his hand. Once you finished shaking hands, you grabbed the notepad and pen again and began to write to Al, as he gazed at you, wondering what you were writing before you turned the notepad around. Alastor leaned closer, and began to read the message:
"It is alright, Alastor. There is no need for you to apologize. And besides, I'm the one that should apologize for not answering your question when you asked me."
Alastor finished reading, and turned his eyes towards you. His sharp smile slowly turned into a soft grin and his glowing eyes had softened. "Don't worry about that my dear! Now I take it since you will have just arrived in Hell, you are lacking some necessities correct?" Alastor had moved away from you, as he continued to talk while walking around your room. Turning back to you, you gave him a small nod. "Then we will head to the city! Me and Charlie can accompany you! What do you think?" he said, as he turned back to you, with his large grin coming back. Nodding your head at Alastor was his indication that you accepted. Smiling wider, Alastor turned back to you, as he made his way to your door. "It feels that I have extended my stay, so I will leave you be darling! Do make yourself comfortable!" he said, as turned his head back to you. Pulling out the pad again, you wrote down another message and showed it to Al.
"Thank you."
"Your welcome my dear! Have a pleasant evening! Also don't forget to head to the kitchen later! My mother's famous jambalaya is on the menu for tonight! So good, it nearly killed her! HAHA!" , Laughing out his response, Al watched as he saw you give him a smile, a real smile this time. "My! What a gorgeous smile!" He thought, as he bid you adieu and made his way back to the lobby. As he made his way back, Alastor stopped and thought about you. Puzzling was a word he used to describe you. He had never encountered a sinner down here who chose to not speak while having the ability to do so. He mostly assumed you were terrified of him, due to his status as "The Radio Demon. Most feared overlord in Hell.", but that wasn't the case. Something about you made him feel odd, hell he even apologized to you, which he would never do given his massive pride/ego, so he wondered why. Seeing you write on the notepad and apologizing for not responding normally, made his heart ache. Why should you apologize for something like that? Realizing he had stopped in the middle of the hallway, he carried on back to the others, still thinking about you and also how would your voice sound when you spoke out loud. Alastor smiled wider, as he thought you were going to be a very special and entertaining sinner here at the hotel.
Part 2 of the story is Here
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lno-x · 2 days
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Hello! I've just came here to say I adore your Gideon and Harrow designs (as someone w/ a big forehead, I thank you for harrow bigger forehead). I do have a question; how did you come up with their designs? What did you keep from canon and what did you add that, well, makes the characters... Them.
Info-dump as much as you want, I wanna learn more about their looks and just whatever else comes to your mind. (Also it feels like really nice to see myself in harrow, at least in appearance.... Thank you).
HI!!!!!!! AND THANK YOU SO MUCH!!!!!!!!!!!! To be honest, my furst Harrow was the most basic Harrow ever
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I only start to read book at this point, but then i came across a line where her skin was described as gray, and that's when the gears in my head started moving headcanons thoughts bellow (tw: non-sexual nuduty)
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Only after some time, when I was already attached to the design, I found a post describing the appearance of the characters on the official Temsyn blog, and it turned out that Gideon’s skin should be darker than Harrow’s. I was very afraid that I would not be accepted in the fandom for such inattention, but as it turned out, many people were pleased to see such design of Harrow, and some even saw it as a representation. I am very happy about that!!! The book gave me enough descriptions of her appearance that I didn't add much except to make her look ridiculously lanky.
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In book 3, at the time of her first meeting with Kiriona, Nona said that her appearance was completely opposite to Harrow’s in every way. That's why I build their portraits on contrasts. Harrow have neat smooth nose, Gideon on the other hand have hooked nose. Harrow have cupid bow lips, Gideon's lips is more slim. Harrow is bony, Gideon is kinda curvy. Harrow has tsureme eyes, Gideon have tareme eyes. And etc. etc. Almost all the details are taken from the book, even her acne, so again I didn’t add much of my own. Unless I think that Gideon is not as big as she thinks she is (Camilla is bigger) (gaining weight in the ninth house with a terribly poor diet is very difficult) This post changed my whole imagination about her.
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Necromancer gideon as bonus!!
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narislvr · 3 months
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domestic!ellie who finds herself being completely smitten by you during your weekly movie night. ✧.*
a short and quick one-shot ౨ৎ ˖ ࣪⊹
Palestine resources !!
DVD's litter the mahogany coffee table in messy arrays of colors and titles as you search for a specific disc for tonight's movie night. It wasn't a movie you and ellie had watched together yet, but you knew it was somewhere in your collection as you hunched over the edge, eyeing each and every disc the two of you owned.
"does it really take this long to pick a movie, babe?" ellie would tease, clicking her tongue as she set down two of your blankets on the couch behind you before crossing her forearms over the crown of your head and resting her chin on them. a huff leaves your lips at her comment as you tilt your head upwards, her playful gaze meeting yours through your lashes and her messy bangs.
"hey, you choose the same movie every week. You have absolutely no room to talk," you quip back, a fond look in your eyes as you watch her chuckle in amusement before glancing back down and finally spotting the DVD you had been searching for. "aha! found it!" you cheer, holding the disc up for ellie to see.
"...mama-mia? babe, I swear if this is one of those musicals you like.-"
"you'll love it. promise." you interrupt, a giddy chime in your voice as you carefully shake her off and get up to insert the beloved disc into the waiting dvd player. seeing your excitement, ellie only shook her head while letting out a playful overdramatic sigh.
"atleast pick up your mess first."
──
so maybe ellie did "love" it, but not because of the plot nor the abundance of ABBA classics. Instead it was because of the way it seemed to bring you so much joy as you smiled from ear to ear and you sang along to each and every song while commenting on little parts of the movie she otherwise wouldn't have picked up on. it was endearing, and although you were generally a rather bright person, she couldn't help but admire the genuine light in your eyes as you watched the film she had learned was your favorite.
her sketchbook was on her lap, her gaze flickering from you down to the page every so often as she scribbled down little doodles of you singing or mimicking certain actions from the characters on screen. you were too busy attempting to harmonize with "donna and the dynamites" to super trooper, that you didn't notice the way her attention was solely on you as she drew a portrait of your side profile. the light from the screen illuminated your features, accentuating the curves and edges of your face with a soft glow that she swore made you look almost ethereal. in the moment you were her muse, regardless of whether your voice cracked or went off key, and all she wanted to do was capture this moment and live in it forever.
"you're not paying attention, els." she hears you whine as your attention finally shifts back to ellie who was still sketching away in her sketchbook.
"Of course I am," she responds, looking up at the screen for a second and realizing she didn't actually know what was going on as she watched sophie help one of the three men crawl out of under a table. you raise a brow at her and she gives you a sheepish smile in return as she puts her sketchbook to the side and signals for you to lean closer to her to which you happily ablige.
"doesn't seem like it," you hum, sneaking a glance at the open book at ellies side before shifting slightly to rest your head against her chest. her arm wraps around your waist, her fingers gently resting on your stomach as she presses a kiss to your forehead.
"but I am, promise." she responds, deciding to finally pay attention to the film despite her fingers itching to finish her drawing. It was a habit she had picked up during her time with Joel, always sketching little pictures of things she found interesting in the films and writing down quotes she would later recite to the older man whenever there was a chance to reference them. she found herself doing that less nowadays but it was still something she enjoyed doing, especially in special situations like these where it was you she was drawing instead.
as the movie neared it's end, she found that maybe she could appreciate the plot even if it was rather odd in her opinion. your singing had quieted down to small hums as you slowly began to drift off against ellie's chest, the rise and fall of her chest lulling you into a sense of comfort despite your attempts to stay awake until the end of the movie. she would definitely tease you about it tomorrow morning, especially after all the times you swore you'd stay up despite your track record of falling asleep. It was cute, a sweet moment she wouldn't replace with anything in the world.
she brushes a stray strand of hair from your face, a fond look in her eyes at her feather light touch before she carefully reaches for her sketchbook with the hand that wasn't holding you to her.
she flips it open to the page she had been drawing on before scribbling something down in messy handwriting under your portrait.
"Mamma mia, here I go again ,, My, my, how can I resist you?"
it was dumb, and the song didn't necessarily fit the situation, but she knew you'd get a kick out of it the day she'd finally show you the sketchbook filled with pictures of you.
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toxicanonymity · 7 months
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Forever for her. Left in Lincoln, pt. 7 .
10k, softdark!Joel Miller x virgin f!reader
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Series Master List | official playlist | floorplan
WARNINGS: I8+, virginity loss, big girthy age gap, angst, dark fluff, reader menstruates, p in v, fingering, grinding, creampie, subtle intimidation, manipulation, horror background elements. Joel is creepy, dark, delulu, and cringe (reader is sheltered, isolated, hormonal). Enthusiastic but dubious consent (brainwashing?), playing fast and loose with climate and fruit. Reader wears a flannel from Joel's closet. Haphazardly edited. This is not the last part.
"We're givin' each other everything, right?" You nodded, then he continued, "So listen." He paused and wet his lips. "I would do anything for ya, peaches." He looked down. "Anything." He met your eyes again and swallowed. "Anything to keep ya safe. . . " He lowered his voice. "an' anything to keep ya mine." 
You woke up in Joel's bed, and he was nowhere in sight. You were warm, almost too warm. The dress was hanging on the back of his bedroom door.  Your undergarments and a pad were on the nightstand.
You took a bath, then put your robe back on and laid on the bed staring at the dress on the back of the door. You could hear the rhythmic scrape of a rake outside and inwardly smiled, picturing Joel doing yard work. You put on your robe, crossed the room to look out the window and felt a refreshing draft as you held the curtains back.  In the bottom right corner of the window's top pane, there was a spiderweb on the outside of the glass. The rake continued to scrape against the ground in the distance.  The web was well-defined and irregular, some of the fibers thicker than others. You admired its intricacy and followed the design, looking for the spider, wondering if it was a male or female.
The rhythmic scraping of the rake lulled you into a trance as you followed the web from the outer edge in, until a black, out-of-focus mass fell right in front of your nose, then you felt a tickle on your chest. You gasped and stifled a squeal. Your body jerked into panic mode. You rapidfire slapped yourself on the chest and felt it smush against your robe. You wiped it on the window pane, then looked at the crumbled spider with its legs drawn in on itself, still moving but barely. It looked like a slow death, but you hoped it wasn't painful. Surely it never thought about its prey this way.  
You took a deep breath and tried to slow your heart rate.  You recalled that time back at your house, outside the spider shed, so long ago – Frank's words through laughter, "we're gonna get through this, honey." You took slow, calming breaths, then swallowed and whispered "sorry," before abruptly turning and walking to the bathroom. You washed your hands and chest with soap again, then came back and sat on the bed. The rake had stopped moving. 
You finally stood up and retrieved the dress, bringing it to the bathroom with you and locking yourself in. You didn't want Joel to see you if it didn't look good on you. Plus, you had to do something really private.
First you went to the toilet. It was its own room within the bathroom. You locked it, too. You sat there for about fifteen minutes trying to let as much of your period out as you could after being horizontal all night. You didn't want all the built up blood pooling in your pad right away. 
Once you did all you could, you washed up and looked in the mirror. You stood there and looked at yourself in your underwear for a minute, mostly looking at your face. You looked different, serious, but vibrating with a new energy. You imagined Joel standing behind you, as if you were in a portrait. Something you'd never have.  But at least you had each other. 
-
You finally put the dress on, over your head. You could just barely reach the back zipper to finish it. It felt much less cumbersome than you imagined it would. It was light and unrestrictive. The lace sleeves had enough room. It felt as comfortable as any other dress. You didn't look in the mirror right away. You looked down at yourself, then  looked over your back, and down your arms. You looked in the reflection of the shower glass and the silhouette looked good enough. 
You turned around to look in the real mirror, and you looked nice. The lace made you feel like a doll, but somehow you looked older than yourself at the same time. You turned around and admired it from the side and over your shoulder from the back, then smoothed it down over your butt and you didn't see the bulkiness you feared from your pad. You looked at yourself head on again, and the only thing out of place was the redness on your chest from scrubbing away the spider. With the dress on, there was a new smile behind your eyes, thinking about how Joel got it for you. 
You went to the kitchen to look out the back window.  You didn't see Joel and were somewhat relieved to have another moment to yourself.  Your tummy felt nervous. You knew it was excitement, but the physical sensation was in discernable from anxiety.  There was a little jar of apple juice on the table with a pill and a note that said "cramps?" You were feeling okay but thought about taking half of it anyway. 
You sniffed the juice and it smelled good. You sat at the kitchen table and stared at the apple juice in the jar, then took a long sip and watched the tiniest bit of apple sediment settle back to the bottom. It was delicious.  You  took half the pill and downed the rest of the juice, then your stomach rumbled. You got an apple from the kitchen counter and sat back down. You inspected it and pressed it. You cut it with your thumbnail to make sure it wasn't rotten. It was crisp, and juice beaded along the crescent moon from your nail. You took a bite and it was fine. You relaxed into the chair and ate the apple. 
Joel had let you sleep late. It was almost mid day.  Just as you were finishing up your apple, you noticed him outside through the kitchen door window. He was standing there and looking at you like you were the most beautiful thing he'd ever seen. He was wearing a white button-up shirt that looked like one Frank might wear to one of his black tie dinners. Joel came inside and as he turned around to close the door, you admired his lower body in a pair of form fitting khakis. 
"You look nice," you told him. 
He exhaled a small laugh and looked at the floor as he crossed the room to you. He sat down at the table and took your hand. "You look like an angel." He kissed your hand and scooted closer.  He smelled like aftershave (although he wasn’t shaved, thank goodness) and a hint of sweat from his yard work. As comfortable as he made you feel, you still got butterflies around him. 
He asked, "Hungry?" 
You nodded. "A little."
"How bout a lil picnic, somethin' light?" 
You nodded "is it nice out?"
"Prettiest day we could want, peaches."
—------
He made some grits and you sat at the table watching.  He pulled the wagon with a basket, quilt, and blanket, and held your hand as you slowly walked. He squinted and looked at the trees, then at you.
He asked, "How ya feelin'?" 
"Good, I'm fine." 
"Good."
You assumed you were going to "your tree," but instead you arrived at a peach tree. He had cleared the area around it so no debris was in the way.  He looked around and asked, "Whatcha think?" 
You looked around.  It was a good spot, away from the back, but not too close to the street. Insulated enough to feel private. You nodded, "yeah, this is nice."
Joel spread out the quilt, then the blanket, then, before sitting down, he took both your hands in his. "I feel so lucky, peaches. You're the most special girl in the world."  His eyes bored into yours. "Really mean that. There's no one like you, darlin'."
You looked down then met his eyes again, biting your lip. "I think you're special, too."
A breeze came and swept your dress out, making the scene feel like a postcard. 
He dropped your hands, then fetched something out of his pocket and looked at it.  Your heart skipped a beat. His thick fingers were blocking your view.
"Now darlin', I'm gonna give ya somethin', but first. . ."
He held it up. It was gold and shiny. Your birth father's wedding band. Your heart skipped a beat and a knot formed in your stomach.  
"My. . ." You couldn't finish the sentence. This meant he knew about the gun, too. . . and your mother's knife.  
Joel must have seen it on your face. "Left everything else how ya had it. You're a smart girl, peaches."  
You tried to read his face. It was soft, sympathetic. You nodded hesitantly. 
"It's okay, darlin'. I don't blame ya. I woulda done the same." He held the ring between his forefinger and thumb and you opened your palm. "Smart to be prepared." 
You breathed a sigh of relief as the knot in your stomach relaxed. But even as it faded, you still had that nervous–no, excited–tummy. 
Joel put the ring in your hand and closed it. He held his hand there around yours and seemed like he might say something else, but he didn't. 
You didn't have anywhere to put the ring.  You had a passing thought to put it on your thumb but it felt stupid.  You felt an urge to say you were going to give it to Joel, but you didn't say anything since he let you off the hook. 
Joel reached back in his pocket and fished out another ring, smaller. It was silver with inset stones. He held it up and said, "I want you to have this one." He stepped closer, so his feet were outside yours. "We're givin' each other everything, aren't we?" 
You nodded, and his eyes watered. 
He nodded with you and his brow furrowed. "I love you. . . And I love bein' a family, the two of us."
Your own eyes felt misty. "I love you, too."
He took your hand, and slid the ring onto it. It was old fashioned, simple. "Ain't never gonna let ya go."
"Good," you whispered. 
He kissed your hand, and when he tried to hold your other hand, too, you realized you were still holding your father's ring. 
"Um," you cleared your throat. "Would this fit you?" You asked and opened your hand. His face relaxed. 
"I dunno, peaches," he whispered. His eyes sparkled at you. He held his hand palm-down. The top of his ring finger's knuckle was a little red as if he'd already tried to put it on. You slid the ring part way on, but his finger was too big. 
"Sorry," you muttered and felt a lump in your throat. You didn't have anything to give him. It rested above his knuckle. 
"S'okay darlin', it's the fact that ya tried." He unbuttoned his shirt pocket, dropped the ring into it, then buttoned it again. "I'll keep it safe for ya."
You sucked your bottom lip into your mouth and nodded, looking up at him shyly, somehow feeling like you ruined this. 
He cupped your face and read your eyes, then closed the gap between your faces and his lips pressed into yours. 
He hugged you into him, kissed you harder, then murmured, "wanna sit down?"
You nodded.
You smoothed your dress under you and sat down with your knees to the side, leaning toward him.  He unpacked a thermos of grits and two bowls. He unbuttoned his wrists and rolled up his sleeves and his forearm flexed with every lift of the spoon.  You ate mostly in silence, but he looked at you adoringly the whole time and your nerves faded.  His wrist nudged his inner thigh and when your eyes drifted there, the shape of his cock sent a pang between your legs. He followed your gaze and your face heated up as he raised his eyebrows. 
When you were finished eating, you washed it down with the apple juice, then Joel packed up the basket and put it back in the wagon. When he settled back onto the blanket again, he had a serious look about him. 
He sat down with his legs folded to the side so his knees were toward you, and he braced his hand on the blanket, leaning toward you. He kissed you again.  He tasted like apples and you imagined he did, too.  As he pulled away, he read your face and cupped your cheek. "You're the most beautiful angel, darlin'," he smiled.  His gaze lingered, then he swallowed and looked down.  He sat up straighter and cleared his throat. He asked again, "We're givin' each other everything, right?" 
You nodded, then he continued, "So listen," then wet his lips and paused. "I would do anything for ya, peaches." He looked down. "Anything." He swallowed. "Anything to keep ya safe," he met your eyes and lowered his voice. "And anything to keep you mine." 
Your heart raced and you slowly nodded as he let it sink in.
"Get what I'm sayin', peaches?"
"Bad things," you nodded. 
His brows remained furrowed as he studied your face.  His voice was low and gruff.  "Yeah, you could say that."
You looked down to his shirt and the outline of your father's ring in his pocket. He continued, "and darlin', I've felt this way for some time."
Your chest fluttered.
He looked up at the leaves of the peach tree, and it hit you that this was where he found you that day. 
Your whole body felt warm, especially in the lace sleeves. He looked at you with anticipation and you admitted, "I had a feeling."
He lifted his eyebrows as he searched your eyes. "Okay," he whispered with a small nod. He looked down again. 
"Yeah," you replied.  ". . .and maybe you already did bad things."  Your chest pounded. He looked at you blankly, and once he blinked, you rephrased, "Necessary things. To be together." 
His jaw shifted back and forth. He looked at your mouth, then back up at your eyes. "Would ya wanna know?" 
Tension gathered between your eyebrows.  You took a deep breath, looked at his lips and watched his jaw clench. His eyes watered.  After a moment, you slowly shook your head no. He inhaled and his eyes narrowed. Your voice was a near whisper as you told him, "No. . . Doesn't matter now." 
Joel exhaled and nodded. He looked at you intensely and whispered, "Okay, baby."    
You didn't need to know. You told him, "We're together, that's all I care about."
"Me too, darlin'." He chuckled, then relaxed and said, “so glad we got each other.” He folded his knees toward you again, leaned in, and cupped your cheek, his eyes locked with yours. “Me and you, baby.” 
“You and me,” you whispered, lashes fluttering as his face drifted toward yours. 
—-
Your lips locked, and yours tingled with excitement. 
His hand moved to the back of your head.  His tongue parted your lips, and he pulled you into him as he became more passionate. 
As his kiss intensified, he gently lowered you into lying down on the blanket, with one of his knees  between yours. His hand ran up your side and came to a rest on your breast as his mouth devoured yours.  He palmed your breast, gently bit your lip, and his length hardened against your thigh. When he pulled back, he cupped your face and raised his eyebrows, and his voice was husky. "I'm never," he kissed your lips, then lowered his volume and looked into your eyes, "gonna let you go." His thumb stroked your temple.  His lips brushed yours, then kissed you deeper.  He pulled back, shook his head with a small smile, and his voice became a whisper as he repeated, "Never." 
Your skin prickled with goosebumps, Joel's beautiful face hovering over yours under the peach tree, his body pressed against yours.
"Good," you whispered, and took his head in both your hands. You pulled him down on you. He braced himself with one forearm on the blanket near your head and his other hand traveled back down your side, down your dress, and reached under the skirt of it to your thigh. His hand slid up your thigh and he squeezed it, then lifted your thigh against him. 
He lowered his hips to rest against yours, and his cock grew stiffer against you.  The warm shape of his stiff length made your whole body go weak. He lifted himself off you just long enough to get the skirt of your dress out of the way.  You felt warm and wet between your legs and didn't know how much of it was blood. You knew he didn't care, but it didn't entirely leave your mind. 
He had the front of it bunched up at your hips, with his hand between your legs.  You flinched as his palm glided over your panties, feeling the shape of your pad. But it didn't phase him at all. He gently reached into your panties. 
Your face tensed. “Remember, I–"
"I know, baby," he reassured you with kind eyes.
"What about the dress?”
“Dress don’t matter, darlin’." He kissed you again. "Long as you're feelin' good." He planted another kiss and pressed his hard-on against you again. "Are ya?" 
You nodded an unequivocal yes. It was certainly what your body wanted.  
"Hell, let's paint it red,” he mused. 
You relaxed and laughed softly. 
"No?" He asked with a smile, then leaned his forehead against yours. He kissed you gently.  
The time of the month wasn't ideal, but you wanted it. If you waited, he might think you weren't ready after all. Plus, you were more comfortable than you ever thought you could be. A month ago, you would have died at the thought of a man seeing any evidence of your period at all. But Joel was so reassuring, so comforting, and he really wanted all of you. He was turning it into something beautiful, and you had no doubt he felt that way.  He looked at you again, then asked, “Sure you’re feelin’ good enough?" He kissed you again.  “‘Cause that's all that matters.”
“I am,” you nodded earnestly.”
“You sure?”
"Joel," you sighed on the edge of irritation.
"Ok, darlin'."
He slid his hand down and exhaled vocally when his fingers met your warm, moist folds. He ran his fingers up and down your folds, moistening your clit, then he slowly, teasingly circled it. His cock swelled harder against you. "You wanna go to bed?"
You shook your head. "It's magical out here."
"That's right, peaches," he murmured lowly into your neck, lightly circling your clit with his moist fingers. His breath was warm and humid against your neck.  "Special, ain't it?"
You nodded, and pulled his head back down to yours. Your lips met again.  His thick fingers tensed, slid down, and prodded at your entrance. You tilted your hips and he gave a short, low "mm" as he brought his fingers back to your clit. 
His tongue slid against yours in rhythm with his fingers. His mouth grew hungrier for yours every moment as he massaged your most sensitive place.  He got you almost to the edge. You whimpered as his hands worked within the confines of your panties.  Then he asked,  "Let's take these off, hmm?"  You nodded. He started to do it, then looked at your face to confirm, "You want me to?" 
"I can do it," you lifted your hips and slid them down, and once they were mid-thigh, he finished taking them off. 
He lowered his torso against yours and his massive hand nudged your shoulder up toward him. You wrapped your arms around his neck, and he lifted you into sitting. He traced the back neckline of the dress and murmured, "want this on or off?"
You shrugged. 
"up to you, darlin'. But I sure would like to see ya." He kissed your neck and you could feel him smile against your skin. "If you're warm enough"
You were warm all over. You were so warm at your very core that it was hard to imagine ever being cold again. You asked, "you'll keep me warm, won't you?"
"Course I will."
You cracked a shy smile and planted your hands on the ground to lift your weight off the dress. Joel brought the dress up to your stomach, his fingers smearing it red, then you lifted your arms and he took it off. He planted delicate kisses on your chest at the base of your neck, and your shoulder as he gently nudged your bra straps off. Then he unclasped the back, and you let it fall in front of you. He put the bra aside and you were naked.  He folded the dress into a pillow and put it under your head. 
You looked at Joel's clothes and didn't say anything, but he replied to your silent question with a teasing smile. "no, I don't have to be so dressed..." you silently unbuttoned his pants, eye on his cock straining against the khakis, as he unbuttoned his shirt.  Before pulling down the zipper, you traced the hard shape of his cock, and his chest let out a nearly imperceptible growl at your first rub. 
He made quick work of the remaining shirt buttons, smearing a few of them red.  His chest flexed as he peeled the sleeves down his bulging arms. He took his undershirt off over his head, tousling his hair, which he didn’t fix.  It was the hottest you’d ever seen him. You were sitting back on  your hands, naked body laid out for him.  He looked at you lustily every few seconds as he took his pants off, then his boxers, leaving his commanding cock bobbing heavily before you.  You pulled your eyes back up to his face and he looked at you adoringly. 
He knelt on the blanket. Was this really going to happen? You reached out, and he nodded. You wrapped your hand around his shaft and whined, "I'm ready, you know I'm ready."
"Ready for what, darlin'?"
"To put our bodies together." 
He nodded. "yeah, baby. You're ready. Gonna be real special."
He got between your legs where a fluttering ache was pounding, begging for relief.  He held his cock in his hand. You felt your body making space for him. There was a place inside you that needed to be filled. He slowly lunged toward you and braced his hand on the blanket above your hip.  He ran his tip through your dripping folds and his manhood further hardened. He spread the moisture over his cock. He laid his hard cock on your mound and brought his face to yours again. He rested about half his weight on top of you, his bare body flush with yours, his forearms braced on the blanket. 
He kissed you deeply, grinding his erection against you, slick with your arousal and blood. Your lips embraced his and your mouth practically sucked in his tongue. He licked into you in rhythm with his slow thrusts against you. Your clit twitched against his cock and you lifted your hips, making him moan into your mouth.  You needed him in you yesterday. You lifted your hips again and his mouth curved into a smile against your lips. 
He reached between your legs and the breadth of his hand took up all the space. You whimpered at the first contact of the padding of his fingers with your naked heat. He slowly, lightly rubbed you as he kissed you, then slid his fingers down through your folds, gathering your moisture. He entered you with his middle finger, then his ring finger. You moaned into his mouth as his fingers slid all the way into your warm core. His cock swelled harder against your thigh as he pumped his thick digits in and out of you. He moaned softly, then added a third. Your hips rocked into his hand. 
You were tense, afraid of coming too soon. 
"Joel," you whimpered. 
"Yeah baby," he murmured.
"What if I–ohh–what if I come too soon."
He chuckled, "you can come, baby," he kept working his fingers inside you, pressing his upper palm into your clit. You sighed and the tension swelled in your gut. "'s'a good thing, darlin'. gets ya ready for this." He rolled his stiff manhood against you as he said it. "Nice 'n ready." 
"But Joel," you whined, unsure. "I want you inside"
"You wanna come on my cock?"
"Yeah, on your cock."
"Oh, baby," he moaned, his cock leaking against your thigh. "You will, baby. You will. You'll come again." 
"Really? 
He nodded. "Yeah. C'mon darlin, You'll come on my cock, too."
His eyes were sincere. He returned his attention to your clit and you let go. As you began to contract, he slid his fingers back inside you. "Oh, good girl," he sighed as you squeezed his fingers. "Like that, don't ya? Like squeezin' me?"
You nodded and whimpered, unable to speak as you rode out the orgasm. 
"Oh, baby."  He continued grinding against your hip and kissed you again as you recovered. 
He pumped three fingers again, and under his breath, he muttered, "good. . .good." He moaned and pushed his hips against you. "Now I've got ya stretched, nice and relaxed." 
"Joel," you begged. "Are you gonna–" 
“Oh darlin’, I’m comin’.” he whispered. “Ready to be full of me?”
“Yeah,” you nodded. "Fill me with you," you begged. "Put it in." 
“Givin’ each other everything now,” he reminded you. “Can’t get it back.”
You nodded, “you can have it all.”
“And I’m gonna give it to ya, too.”
You nodded and your walls twitched in anticipation.
"Gonna give it all to ya."
He read your eyes and as you got lost in the black holes of his pupils, the clear fibers of his affection wrapped around you, tethering you to him and the moment. He pulled his hips back and his knees spread slightly.  You spread your legs to make room. He looked between your legs and the affection on his face faded into desire.  “My lands, peaches.” 
He hovered over you.  Your hands skimmed up his sides, and came to rest around his neck.  
He used his hand to notch himself at your entrance and pushed his tip inside, stretching you open. You gasped softly, breasts heaving in anticipation of the rest of it.  You dragged your feet toward your butt on the blanket, lifting your knees to frame his hips. 
“I love you, baby,” he whispered, and put his forehead against yours. 
“I love you too,” you whined, brows furrowed. 
His forehead lifted off yours, his lips returned to your mouth, and his hips pressed forward, inching his cock into you with a stretch.  His lips broke away from yours and his mouth stayed open.  He watched your face as his girth spread you open, dividing your walls.  You gasped and nodded for more.  He pushed further, taking you apart from yourself inch by inch. You imagined even a smidgen more girth wouldn’t feel good. He bowed his head and backed out an inch of his length, watching your body suck him back in as he pushed in a little more than he had before. 
“God damn,” he whispered, then wet his lips as he looked back up at you with half his length sheathed in your warmth. 
“You feel so good, joel”
“Oh, darlin’,” he breathed. “You got no idea.” 
“I want it all,” you begged.
He nodded, “Okay, baby.” then slowly pushed his hips forward, gradually burying his length with some effort, stuffing you full of him.  “Oh, darlin’.” The look of pain on his face told you how hard he was trying not to slam into you. He was slow and gentle, and his tip pushed through your core with even more heft than you imagined.  Each inch of him spread you more and filled you fuller than you thought you could be. Your body made more space and he took it up right away. 
“Joel,” you breathed. 
He whispered your name and said, “you’re doin’ so good.” His flesh didn’t just complete you, it made you more than you were. He took you apart and made you something new, something wrapped around him so tight. “almost there, baby.” And then he groaned “Ohhhh, god,” as you swallowed up the rest of him. It was a perfect fit. 
You whimpered as he came to a rest. His cock filled up the whole space and made more for itself.  The fuzz of his balls brushed your skin. Your mouth hung open and you breathed, savoring the fullness of feeling him there inside you for the first time. 
“Oh, darlin’,” he sighed, staying all the way inside you. He pressed his lips into yours, then pulled back and asked, “You okay?”
You nodded, happy tears prickling your eyes. His brows knitted. 
“Are you okay?” you asked. 
He nodded. “First time in years,” he whispered, and looked up at the tree. His cock twitched inside you and his tip nudged your cervix. “You tell me when you’re ready, baby.”
“I’m ready,” you nodded. 
He looked you in the eyes again. “Our life starts now.” He withdrew most of his length, then let it back into you, his belly flush with yours while his cock dragged heavily inside you. He closed his eyes as your bodies became flush again. He retreated again at a snail’s pace, then pushed in a little faster. 
“Saved this just for me, didn’t ya?”
He met your eyes again, then added, “Never be anyone else.” 
He lowered his face for another kiss.  Each time his flesh filled you up you could hardly believe how your body hugged him.  It was like your body had been waiting for him all along.  It really had been. This was what your bodies were made to do. Complete each other.  
He looked at you and his brow furrowed again. 
You asked, "What? What, Joel?"
“Now that I’ve been inside ya,” he breathed, "I’m not sure I know how not to be.”
You knew exactly how he felt. You couldn't bear the thought of being pulled apart. 
He reached a slow but steady rhythm, gently filling you with his cock. You traced his shoulder, then his bicep.  His bare stomach was resting against your skin, his happy trail touching you with each thrust m. He had about half his weight on you, and he let gravity help as he thrust into you. You imagined it as a magnetism. Each time he retreated, your bodies pulled back together. He bowed his head and watched himself disappear between your legs, and watched your body clinging to his shaft, hugging him tight, trying to pull him back in, not letting him go. “God damn, baby,” he breathed as he watched. “most beautiful thing I ever seen.”
When your caress reached the crook of his elbow, he braced on one forearm so he could take your hand and interlace.his fingers with yours. He held your hand to his chest and whispered, “All yours, darlin’,” his hips still moving, his cock sliding snugly against every ridge of you . 
You nodded tearfully, pressing your palm into his chest, feeling the soft hair and the hard muscle. 
“Every beat of it, peaches.” 
Your other hand cupped his cheek, then slid up to tangle in his hair as his face returned to yours, kissing you as he buried his length in you. When your faces separated, you watched the surreal beauty of his form – his messy hair, his tan skin glimmering, his brown eyes flickering with affection as he filled you to the brim with his flesh. 
“Oh, baby, you feel so good”
“I–I’m so–it’s so–”
“Packed full of it, aren’t ya baby?”
You nodded. “It’s so much,” you whispered. “But not too much,” you quickly added. “‘s’perfect.”
“So perfect, darlin’--Ohhh god, baby-–always knew ya were.” 
All you saw was him, and the rhythm of his chest over yours. Beneath his heavy breaths and moans, leaves danced in the breeze, birds chirped, and the occasional piece of fruit thumped in the distance as it hit the ground.  “Oh baby, I've been starvin’ for this.” His hips moved steadily, filling you with his cock every second or so, whispering your name here and there, marveling at your beauty.  
“It feels so good, Joel.” 
“how’s it feel?”
“Meant to be there,” you whispered, then sighed as his cock dragged through your core, completing you again. “Like it’s filling my body” More than that–it was creating space for itself, space you didn’t have before, that's the part you didn't expect. It was moving the most intimate parts of you out of the way and replacing them with him. 
You tried to describe it.  “It’s like –”  He lowered his mouth to your neck and sucked “--oh, joel–it’s–it’s–.” 
“Oh, baby,” he sighed against your neck, his hips moving steadily. “I know it, darlin’,” he murmured, grinding his pelvis into yours with each smooth thrust. He slowed his hips, still grinding against you, stiff cock dragging inside you. “Meant to be right here.” Your leg wrapped around him and his thrusts became more measured, his pelvis closer against you, grinding into your clit. “Meant to be fillin’ you.”
The pleasure was swirling, nearly coming to a boil in your gut, humming for release against his front, around his cock. “I love you,” you breathed, lifting your hips into his. 
“Ohhh, baby I love you too,” he whispered with a smile and near laugh. “‘n’ I love how ya take it.” His eyes darted around your face affectionately, then he bowed his head to look at where your bodies met. “Look so pretty wrapped around this cock,” he looked back up at you with bright, glistening eyes. “Look so pretty, peaches.” Your clit twitched. His movements had your hips lifting into him all on their own. “Yeah, that’s right, darlin’.” You let yourself grind up into him. “Jus’ like that,” he whispered, his body  grinding against your mound as his cock moved within you. The tension hummed louder and tightened your core on the edge of bliss. You both moaned. 
“Now I want ya to come, peaches,” he said in a serious tone. “Ohh, oh baby—want ya to come and squeeze me real good, can ya do that?”
You nodded, biting your lip, vision getting blurry with the moisture in your eyes.  You couldn't take any more tension but unsure if or when the peak would overtake you. 
“C’mon, I got ya,” he breathed as you teetered on the edge. “Breathe, baby. c’mon.” You remembered to breathe, his pelvis grinded into yours again, and then you whimpered as the tension burst. “Jo–ohhhh,” your voice was shaky as it overtook you. Your clit spasmed and each wave pulsed outward through your body. Your tears overtook your eyelashes as you moaned and gasped. Your walls clamped down around his cock, and he groaned. 
“You–Ohgoddamn,” he muttered as though losing control. Then he groaned, bottomed out hard, and erupted with a shudder. A burst of warmth flooded your core, then your whole body. He dipped his head to kiss you as he came. His cock pulsed into your walls again and again and your walls squeezed in return. His lips pressed into yours, then his tongue. He kissed you and moaned into your mouth. He sucked and gently bit your bottom lip as he filled you.  He was filling you all the way up, every single part of you full of him, his essence rushing through you. 
There was before this and after this, you finally got it, after all this time he tried to make you see. You  understood everything. Like how there was so much beauty left in the world, and it was right there between you. It wasn’t an abstract wish, it was the physical presence of you and him, your bodies together, pulsing against each other’s most intimate parts, his seed spilling into you, his lips on yours, your bodies inseparable, on the ground in the orchard. You saved it for him. Your whole life led to him. 
His kiss became more tender as he finished coming. He pulled back and his eyes glistened as he read your face. 
You locked eyes for what felt like forever, with Joel still breathing heavily, most of his weight on top of you.
“I love you,” he whispered. 
“I love you, too.” 
His eyes fell to your mouth and he kissed you again.  “gonna pull out now, okay?”
Your lip trembled and your temples felt weak at the idea of your bodies not being joined. He could tell.
“It’s okay, darlin’. We’ll lay here, long as ya want.” He nodded at you and raised his eyebrows for permission to pull out.
You bit your lip and nodded. 
He lay half on top of you, with a hand on your breast. “You okay?”
“Yeah,” you whispered. “How did it–how was it?”
“Like nothin’ i’ve ever known, baby.” He sucked in a shaky breath that made you look down at his face and his cheeks were wet. 
You took a short nap like that, naked under the peach tree, until a dead leaf fell and tickled your arm and you jolted awake. A bird cawed at your sudden movement, and Joel asked, "you okay?" 
When you got up, you only put your underwear back on. Joel wrapped you in one of the blankets, put his arm around you as he brought you back inside. 
As you were walking back to the house, you heard the car noise again, toward the front of the orchard, and you froze, your eyes wide, looking toward the street. But this time it came with a breeze and the rustling of leaves. 
“Just the wind, darlin’. What’s got ya so jumpy?”
“I dunno,” you mumbled. “Sorry.” 
You didn’t realize you were jumpy.  Maybe since you found out Bill and Frank could come home soon, you kept expecting them. 
—-
When you got back inside, he laid the dress across the back of a chair in the living room and traced one of several red smudges with his fingers. There was bright red and dark red. "See? It's beautiful." He patted your hair. "gonna remember this forever." 
He ran a bath. You sat on the edge of the garden tub as the bath filled up, and he kneeled in front of you in his boxers. He curled his fingers into the waistband of your panties and you stood up as he helped you take them off. There was diluted  blood drying on your inner thighs. He dipped a sponge into the hot water to clean you. When you noticed a bit of his cum leaking out of you, it made you sad. You hoped he’d give you more. 
Joel got in the tub first, then you got between his legs and laid back. You laid in silence for a while, then said, “I loved that." Hearing yourself in the bathtub sounded crisper than usual. 
“What’d ya love, darlin'.”
“I love having you inside me.”
“Oh, baby, it’s my favorite place to be.”
"Good”
His cock twitched against your lower back. “‘Course it is, baby.” He kissed the crown of your head.  
"I feel empty now"
"'S'okay, darlin'. You're s'posed to. 'S'posed to want somethin' there." His hand came between your legs and gently fingered your floating curls.
He shifted his hips under you. "Gotta pace yourself, but it'll feel better and better, I promise."
"Okay."
"We’ll rest up and do it again later." 
"Yeah."
—---------
That night, you did it again.  He was deep inside you, pressing sweet kisses into your neck as you whimpered beneath him.
“How’s it feel,” he murmured into your neck. “Still feel good?”
“Feels good,” you whined
“S’only gonna get better, baby. Better every day.” He slowly retreated, then sighed "ohh, baby" as he filled you with his cock again. He was still fucking you slowly, carefully, grunting and moaning with your whimpers and sighs. His hair was messed up again, moving to the beat of his thrusts, and his neck veins were bulging. 
There was a loud rap at the door, startling you both.  Joel’s hand reflexively covered your mouth as he froze, then composed himself and completed one last slow thrust, one that felt even better with you frozen in fear.  
“Gonna be okay, baby,” he whispered, then pulled out. He slowly released his hand from your mouth, pressing a kiss into your lips. Your eyes were wide. You hadn't heard the car over your mutual pleasure.  "Gonna be okay," he repeated.  
He pulled on a pair of jeans and white t-shirt. He took a gun out of his nightstand.  There was another loud rap at the door, longer this time. A deep voice with the same drawl as your husband. “JOEL, IT’S ME. OPEN UP.” 
Joel looked at you and whispered, "Tommy."  
Joel put the gun in the back of his jeans and shut the bedroom door behind him.  
—--
The front door creaked as Joel opened it. “Tommy.” You heard the slapping of a hand on a back as they greeted each other, then the door closed.  “Didn’t know ya were comin’, woulda gotten a room ready or–”
"Just dropped off Bill ‘n Frank.”
“Shhhh.”
“Hey, what the hell's goin' on? Where's the kid?”
“Tell’em she’s safe.  Asleep upstairs."
"You don't think she'd wanna see'em?"
"No sense in wakin' her up." 
There was a long pause, then Joel asked, “Why’d ya drive’em?" 
“Their truck gave out.” After a long pause, Tommy added “Frank said somethin’s off with you.” 
“What're you talkin’ about? Why would Frank said that?” 
"Said ya smiled. Made'em uneasy." 
Joel scoffed. "I was bein' nice."
Tommy laughed. "I told'em you're weird about hospitals, prolly overcompensatin'. Told'em everything's fine. . ."
Joel said, "good, ‘cause everything is."
"You gonna invite me in?"
"Come on in." A few footsteps, then the front door shut. 
Tommy asked, “She’s upstairs?” 
Tommy’s boots thudded away from Joel's bedroom, toward the stairs. 
“Tommy, wait.”  
Tommy didn’t wait.  Two sets of footsteps climbed the stairs, with Joel’s quieter steps following Tommy's boots. You couldn't hear their conversation. A door opened and closed upstairs. Then another. And another.  You turned the ring on your finger.
Footsteps, then indistinct heated words.
The lighter set of footsteps descended the stairs with the boots following behind.  Tommy's voice got closer on the way down the stairs. “somethin’ ain't right here.”
The front door locked before Tommy made it down.  
Joel was calm. “Slow down, take a breath.”
Tommy replied, “I don’t like that look you’re givin’ me, brother.”
Joel told him, “You need to sit down and listen to me.”
“Joel, if I don’t come back, Bill’s comin’ over here.” 
"She's safe," Joel insisted. "C'mere, let's have a drink."
The footsteps faded into the living room, then stopped abruptly. "What the hell's that?" The footsteps slowly resumed, then stopped again. Then, the rustling of fabric.  Tommy's voice was shaky. "What the hell is this, Joel?"
"Shhhhh. Ain't what ya think." 
"Don't look like it," Tommy laughed in bad humor, then composed his nerves into calm anger. "What'd you do, Joel?"
"Nothin', Tommy. It’s her period, damn. Now sit down."
"I may be the only one who knows how dangerous you are, but don't act like I don't fuckin’ know.” 
Your heart skipped a beat.  
Joel responded, “You don’t."
You held your neck, looking around the room. Your pulse was pounding against the heel of your palm.
“I don't? What the hell’s that s'posed to mean?”
“I’m in love with her, Tommy." Your heart swelled. 
"Jesus. . ." 
Tommy mumbled something else, and Joel responded, “She's not a kid." 
"She's Bill's kid," Tommy countered. 
"Not anymore. And I’ll do anything to keep her." After a pause, Joel added, “I mean anything.”
"I fuckin' know you do," Tommy snapped. 
"Then we’re clear," Joel said. "Tell'em ya didn't wanna wake her up."
"Not ‘til I see her," Tommy insisted. 
There was a beat of silence, then Joel offered, "Cool off first, have a drink. Don't wanna scare her."
Your heart raced. Their voices became indistinct as they moved towards the kitchen.
—---------
You sat on the bed stunned. Your parents were home, and you weren't as happy as you imagined you'd be to hear it.  You were wholly preoccupied by Tommy's words. Joel was dangerous. You had already come to know it in your heart, but hearing someone else say it out loud had your mind racing. You never thought about what that meant for you. The worst part was the fear in Tommy’s voice. Would Joel do something to Tommy? His own brother? They were family. You and Joel were family. 
You got up and went into Joel's closet.  You pulled out a flannel and put it on over your nightgown.  You built up your courage, then slowly opened Joel’s bedroom door. 
—---------------
You emerged from the bedroom, unsure how either of them would react. You pulled the flannel over your hands, hiding the ring. As you tiptoed into the living room, Joel was on the sofa facing away from you. Tommy was facing you and saw you first. He was holding a mostly empty glass of whiskey. Joel's glass was already empty on the coffee table.  Tommy sat upright and swallowed. He put his glass down on the side table. 
“Hey,” Tommy's voice was soft, like he didn't want to startle you.  “You okay?” 
Joel looked over his shoulder, then turned his body. 
“Yeah,” you nodded and walked over to them, looking at Joel.  Joel's face softened as he looked at you.  You sat on one of Joel’s thighs, your bare feet on the floor holding some of your weight.
“They're home, darlin’,” Joel said and looked at you with pleading eyes.  “wanna go now, or let’em get some rest, see’em in the mornin’?”
You didn’t hesitate. “Let’em get some rest.” 
Tommy sat back and raised his eyebrows in surprise. When you looked right at him, the dress caught your eye on the other chair and your chest felt hot. 
Joel cradled your head with one hand and kissed you on the cheek. “Ok, peaches. Give Uncle Tommy a kiss goodnight, then go back to bed."
You looked at Joel hesitantly. He nodded toward Tommy and flexed his jaw.
Tommy watched you curiously as you approached. You gave him a loose hug around the neck and the lightest peck on the cheek. 
“Night, sweetie,” Tommy mumbled. 
You went back to Joel's lap and put your arms around his neck. He looked at you and you searched his eyes. He gave you a chaste kiss on the lips and whispered, "Go on. I'll be there soon," with a wink. His hand was big and warm on your back as you stood up to walk away.
Before you closed the bedroom door behind you, Tommy said, "Okay, she's not a kid. . . Don't mean it's right."
Their conversation became indistinct until Tommy was leaving a few minutes later. 
Joel said, “I’ll leave it unlocked.  You can stay upstairs.” 
The front door opened and closed. 
—------
You weren't planning on it but as soon as the front door began to close, your legs carried you into Joel's bathroom, and your shaking hand closed the door. You sat on the tiled floor against the door. Your heart pounded. Joel would never do anything to hurt you. Why was your body reacting this way? Your eyes felt weak. You didn't want him to see you scared or upset, but this couldn't be much better. You closed your eyes and tried to get back to that place you were in the orchard where everything in the universe made sense. 
Joel came into the bedroom and shut the door behind him. "Aw, baby" he said to himself as he realized where you were.  He took off his pants and put the gun back in the drawer, then approached the bathroom door. "You in there, peaches?” 
“Yeah,” you managed weakly. 
“Can I come in?” Joel tried to open the door and found it was locked.
“Not now.” You wanted to stop crying first. 
After a moment of silence, he slid down the other side of the door and sat down.  “Can ya talk to me, baby?”
You sniffled, then whined, “I dunno what to say.” 
Joel sighed and you heard the soft thud of his head resting against the other side of the door. “I love you.”
“I love you too,” you whimpered.
“We’re a family now, baby. Gotta work through whatever you’re feelin’.” 
You scooted back and slowly opened the door. 
Joel came in and sat on the tile next to you, your backs against the door.  He stroked your thigh. His voice was soft. “Wanna come back to bed or wanna talk in here?”
“Here.”
“Okay,” he whispered. He was studying your eyes, desperate to read them. 
You winced with a cramp and put your hand where it hurt.  He went to get you a pill and came back.  He handed you the pill and a glass of water. “Want me to run you a bath?”
You shook your head no.  You didn't need a third bath.
“What’s wrong, baby?”
“What’s wrong?” you repeated. 
You looked at him, hating the fact that he was going to make you ask him. Earlier, you said you didn't want to know. You wanted it to stay an abstract, romantic concept that he would kill for you. But the way Tommy was talking, you felt like you needed something. You felt like you needed to know Joel better.
Joel took a deep breath in through his nose.  His voice was soft and careful.  “Tommy’s my brother, and I love’m, but .. .sometimes, brothers. . . .” He was searching for words, and at the same time, searching your face for an out.  He gave up and his voice dropped an octave. “What’d ya hear, darlin’?”
You heard the words come out of your mouth before you could stop them. "How'd you kill him?" 
Joel squinted and searched your face. “Who?”
“What happened to Jesse?” you asked. Joel looked up at the ceiling and his nostrils flared. His chest expanded with a calming breath. You continued, “I don’t care about him at all. I don’t even care if you killed him but I wanna know."
"Thought ya didn't wanna know."
"Now I do." 
“I dunno if that’s a good idea, peaches.” 
“You said you’d do anything for me. This is what I need, I need you to tell me.” 
Joel sighed and swallowed, then nodded.  “There was an accident.”
"What kind of accident?"
"He fell." 
“What? Like from a tree?”
“No, when he was diggin’.”  
You felt lightheaded imagining the garden beds, and the way Joel tucked the pumpkin flower behind your ear. Something told you he was still out there. You tried not to show anything on your face. 
You asked, “Why didn’t you tell anyone?”
“‘Cause it was my fault. I scared him. Didn't want ya to be afraid."   
“What happened?“
“Won’t do ya any good knowin’ that, darlin’.” Joel sighed.  “Might make ya feel bad.” 
“I don’t care, just tell me.” What bothered you was that it wasn't even serious with the boy. It was nothing like it was with Joel. So Joel didn't have to do whatever he did. All Joel had to do was love you and you would've dropped everything else in an instant. All Joel had to do was hug you.  You really believed that. 
“He was gonna hurt ya, darlin'."  You found that hard to believe, but heard him out.  You reflexively squinted but tried not to look too skeptical.
"Hurt me how."
“He was talkin’ like. . . he was talkin’ disrespectful.”
Your face burned, thoughts flying around in your head about what he possibly could have said.  
Joel did a double take at your face and noticed how embarrassed you were. “Darlin’, you really don’t need to be hearin’ this.” 
“Just tell me.” 
"So when he tried to touch ya. . .” 
“You were watching us?”
“I was worried, darlin’. Just lookin’ out for ya.” 
“So you saw me stop it, then.” 
“Sure did, and I was proud of ya.” There was nothing to be proud of.  It wasn't on any moral grounds, you were just nervous in Joel's orchard. And apparently, you had every reason to be. 
“So what happened?”
“So, next time we were workin', it came up again. . ." 
Your mouth felt dry. 
Joel continued, "I told him that’s not how to treat a woman, that you deserved better.” 
Your heart pounded. “And you were really mad, that's why he fell.”
Joel nodded, and you nodded.  You could picture the rest of it, but you didn't want to. You imagined that when he fell, that wasn't the end of it. 
You took his hand. “Thank you for telling me.”
Joel kissed your hand and breathed a sigh of relief. 
“And thanks for doing that," you added.
Joel squinted at you, taken aback. “Doin’ what, darlin’?”
“Whatever you had to do. . . for me.”
Joel studied your face as though it might have been a trick.  It wasn’t. He slowly nodded.  He kissed your hand again.  “You don’t hate me.”
“Of course I don’t hate you, I love you.”
Joel’s eyes watered.  “This is true love, baby. Unconditional.” 
You asked, “Can I ask you something else?” 
“Anything, peaches.” 
"Who else?”
"Uh," Joel squinted. 
"I asked you how you killed him, and you asked who." 
"Oh, darlin'," he chuckled. 
"Did Abe really leave?"
Joel inhaled then puffed out his cheeks as he let out the breath and hesitantly shook his head no.  
“He was in bad shape when I found him.  Gettin’ sick, talkin’ crazy..” 
“Why didn’t you tell me?”
“You were already scared. . . didn’t wanna make it worse.” 
You barely nodded, trying to process all this, wondering if there was more to it, but consciously pushing the thought away.  You wondered whether you would've been more or less scared if you knew something happened to Abe. 
"You're a smart girl, peaches." 
“What’d Tommy mean when he said you’re dangerous?”
Joel wiggled his jaw and looked away, then back at you.  “I’ve made some mistakes.  Used to let my temper get the best of me.”  He looked down. “Don’t drink like I used to.”  
He scooted around on the tile to face you. He picked up both your hands and looked at you with big, pleading eyes.  “But no matter what, you gotta believe I would never, ever hurt you, baby." His eyes were glistening. "There’s no part'a me that would. I’d sooner hurt myself.” 
You looked at his mouth and just as you saw the smallest quiver, he wet his lips and swallowed.
You whispered, “I know you wouldn’t hurt me.”  
“Good.” He sighed in relief. 
You took your hands away and tightened the flannel around you, then said, “and you wouldn’t hurt anyone I love, because that would hurt me."
Joel swallowed and inhaled through his nose, waiting uncomfortably for you to continue.  
You looked at each other for a few seconds, then you asked, “Are Bill and Frank gonna be okay here?”
He looked away, then back at you before muttering, “I hope so, darlin'.” 
“Even if we can't be together right away?”
Joel squinted at you incredulously.  “What're you talkin’ ‘bout, can’t be together?" He scoffed coldly, making your temples hurt. "I’m sure as hell not lettin’ Tommy tell me what to do. You gonna let them tell you what to do?”  
“No. . .” You didn’t know what else to say. 
“We talked about this, darlin’. You change your mind?”
You shook your head.  “Guess I’m still nervous. Thought maybe it'd take time." 
Joel clenched his jaw, opened his mouth to speak. Then closed it again. When he did speak, he was calm and measured.  “There’s no scenario where we’re not together, peaches." He raised his eyebrows at you and added flatly, "We promised each other forever.”
“I know,” you whispered. 
“And I meant it,” he added with a hint of accusation. 
You protested, “I did, too.” You did. 
"Well I still mean it."
"I do, too." You weren't lying. Somehow, you didn't want it any less. If anything, your heart wanted it more. You wondered if you went too far in your questions. 
He pried your hands off the flannel to hold them. You tried to relax but your hands were still tense. 
He dipped his head to make eye contact with you and didn't blink. “You and me together. No matter what.” He closed his eyes for a breath and sighed. When his eyes met yours again, he added, “No matter where.”
Your heart fluttered.“No matter where?”
He nodded with a deep inhale through his nose. His eyes wandered, then found yours again. “yeah, no matter where."
This tugged at your heart. Was he really willing to take you out? 
"There's another town . . . Ain't easy gettin’ there, but I reckon if we're real careful. . .”
You pondered it silently.  You wanted to see the world outside, but you never thought about moving. You wanted to live with Joel on this land forever, but you wanted your parents to be okay, too.  Leaving altogether seemed so sudden, so huge. 
You asked, “Really? You would take me out?”
“Scares me to death,” he admitted. "But I just wanna be with you, peaches."
You stayed quiet for a minute. 
"Ain't right they kept ya here all your life," he muttered. 
The thought of leaving forever was scary, but if that's what it took to keep your parents safe, you would. Joel was your home anyway. You could feel at home anywhere with him. 
You asked, “Would I get to say goodbye?”
His mouth tensed and he looked at the floor.
"Not out loud," you conceded. "But could I see them again first?"
He was quiet, reading your face. "If that's what ya need," he nodded somberly. 
“Spend a little time with them?” You asked. 
“How much time?” Joel countered. 
“I don’t know, a few days?”
“You wanna be apart that long?”
“No, but. . . no”
Joel sighed. “Let’s figure this out tomorrow, k?” 
He cradled your head and whispered, “We’ll figure it out.” He pressed his lips into yours, giving you the slowest, most tender kiss.  He pulled back and your eyes clouded up.  
“I love you,” you whispered. “More than anything.”
He nodded, tears in his eyes. 
You added, “And there’s no ‘but’. I’ll go anywhere to be with you.” 
He pulled you into straddling him. Your arms wrapped around him all on their own and you were soothed. It was true, you had given him everything. You were hollow without it, without him. But up against his body, wrapped in his big arms, you felt complete again. You felt safe. 
You could feel his manhood beneath you, warm and soft. He hugged you tight and drew in a ragged breath. He held you and stroked your head for a minute. His cock hardened a little with your crotch against it.  You were beginning to feel the painkiller. “Sorry, baby,” he whispered.  You yawned.  “Thought we’d have more time.”  The front door opened, and you flinched. 
“Just Tommy," Joel whispered. "He’s gonna stay upstairs tonight, okay?” 
“Yeah.” 
“Let’s go to bed, baby.” 
You braced yourself with your hands on his shoulders and stood up. He hooked his thumbs under the flannel collar to help you take it off, but you pulled it tighter around yourself.
Joel pulled his hands away, then rubbed your back. "Okay, darlin'." 
You got in bed, curled up on your side. Joel draped his arm over you and asked, “this okay?” 
“Yeah,” you nodded and loosely laced your fingers with his in front of you. 
“‘S’gonna be fine, baby. We’ll figure it out.” 
“I don’t wanna be apart,” you sniffled. 
“We’re not gonna be,” he reassured you.  “Ever.” 
-----
THIS IS NOT THE LAST CHAPTER. AND YOU WILL HAVE MORE SEX.
However, this is on soft hiatus until after Halloween unless i really feel like putting out the next chapter. Too many seasonal things to cook.
Thank you so much for reading and engaging <3
I'll reblog or comment with Lincoln tag list.
@toxicfics for notifications. The tag list is not long for this world.
All Joel:@ethanhoewke @silkiers @eiviea @evyiione @xdaddysprincessxx @queerly-anxious @chernayawidow @ambassadortotrilliusprime @not-a-unique-snowflake-blog @jasminespringtime @romanarose @fandomsfallnomore @djarinxore @blackvelveteen1339 @manazo @wolvesandvampires @taeslarityy @str84pedro @lokanda  @kyloispunk @filthfairy @fieryglutenfreechickennoodles @harriedandharassed @moonlightdivine @worhols @fan-fiction-floozy @cutesyscreenname   @weddingfairy @pedropascal-whore @spideysimpossiblegirl @feministfanboi @gracieispunk @prettypartyfavor @am-3-thyst @babeincolor @milla-frenchy @switchbladedreamz @within-the-depths @am-3-thyst @may-machin @pedromania91 @sloanexx @paleidiot @yourmistysecret @bean-is-reading
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mickyschumacher · 10 months
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𝐃𝐑𝐄𝐒𝐒 .ೃ࿐
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𝐒𝐔𝐌𝐌𝐀𝐑𝐘: being in a secret relationship with lando norris has been a journey in itself. but nothing comes harder than the moments where you both struggle to keep your hands off one another.
𝐖𝐀𝐑𝐍𝐈𝐍𝐆𝐒: 18+ (minors DNI), unprotected sex (wrap it before your tap it lol), cumming inside, voyeurism, fingering, slight handjob, boyfriend established but secret, cute cringe couple humour, obvious pining, poor knowledge of pr specialist things, mentions of mental health and stress, mclaren in itself needs a warning, mention of fave menace w*ll b*xton (simply ew), allusion of future marriage
𝐏𝐀𝐈𝐑𝐈𝐍𝐆: lando norris x mclaren’s pr specialist!fem!reader
𝐖𝐎𝐑𝐃 𝐂𝐎𝐔𝐍𝐓: 4k+
𝐀/𝐍: this is based of taylor swift’s ‘dress’! okay, so i’m giving you lovelies this one and some others while i study for my last exam 😔 i actually have some requests which are exciting and nerve wrecking but i'm gonna try my level best to do them after my exam. although i’m also supposed be on a plane not too soon after. anyways, thank you so much for your support and patience ♡︎
𝐌𝐀𝐒𝐓𝐄𝐑𝐋𝐈𝐒𝐓
⋆  •°.  。  .°•  ⋆
As a PR specialist, things were constantly changing. For example, for a certain amount of time you were assigned to Fernando Alonso when he was under McLaren. Quite honestly, it was a nightmare.
There was nothing wrong with Fernando. For the time you had spent with him, he was rather sweet. But the media had painted him out as some sort of tyrant of McLaren, claiming that the F1 team belonged to him as opposed to being owned by Zak Brown. Then again, you supposed the Spaniard’s lack of care for listening didn’t help either.
When learning that Fernando was leaving, you could only hope that whoever you were assigned to next was less work than him.
In came Lando Norris, a young driver with ambition and humour, and lucky for you, little work.
Somehow he just knew the right things to say. And if he didn’t, he was always asking you beforehand.
Between the both of you there was only a two year age gap so of course it was easy to befriend each other. You were always talking about something to the other.
His passion for DJing, his childhood or your love for travelling and the gossip of certain celebrities. How you were absolutely certain JLo and Ben Affleck was a PR couple because who on earth had a nude portrait of themselves above their bed?
It wasn’t until almost a year ago where you realised you liked him more than just a friend. There was just something about the way you two communicated that left in trailed sighs, awkward laughs desperate to talk more and grins that got your hearts pacing.
Or perhaps it was the way you had poured your hearts out to one another. As happy as Lando looked, he was one under a lot of pressure which affected is mental health. You were there for all of this ups and downs. You were his number on speed dial for everything.
And when things got a little too much for you, Lando did his best to not only be there for you but to cheer you up. Stupid jokes, random flowers and, teddy bears.
How were you not supposed to like him?
Surprisingly, Lando had been the one to confess his feelings to you. Well, only after one of the engineers from Mercedes was openly trying to court you at an F1 dinner.
Lando had gotten so jealous that he had pulled you aside that evening and begged you to not think of anyone else but him. That you were only supposed to smile like that at him… with him.
At first, you were thrilled and kind of shocked that Lando felt the same way. But that happiness and smile he liked so much quickly faded when you thought about your job.
‘F1’s Lando Norris is dating his PR specialist’…
Yeah… the implications of that sounded terrible. You could imagine it already. What was Lando hiding to date his publicist? Is Lando that good of a person?
And while you and all the people knew the truth, those types of rumours would’ve undermined your job in the first place and honestly, you were sure that McLaren wouldn’t exactly be jumping with excitement that you two were dating.
So you mentioned this to Lando with the suggestion of being secret about your relationship for now.
You could literally see some of the shine in his eyes fade. He was gutted but he understood what you meant. He’d rather be with you secretly than not at all and without his best friend.
our secret moments in a crowded room
they've got no idea about me and you
there is an indentation in the shape of you
made your mark on me, a golden tattoo
Your relationship with him had been a roller coaster. Neither of you had been in a secret relationship and neither of you could deny how fun it was.
Take right now for example. Today was the McLaren’s car launch for the 2023 F1 season. The room was filled to the brim with all sorts of people: journalists, publicists, engineers, marketers, social media managers, the new driver next to Lando, Oscar.
Yet with all those people, Lando and you found it impossible to not find each other. You were constantly meeting each others eyes, especially when you were nearby for his interviews.
There was a thrill, you must admit, about no one knowing about the two of you.
A rush of adrenaline at the thought that no one knew nor expected you to be in Lando’s bedroom this very morning before the launch.
“Remember to be sort of vague about the car and, well, everything. I mean obviously but I don’t think Will’s going down without a fight,” you reminded your boyfriend with an annoyed sigh.
Will Buxton was not only a F1 journalist but a man who got under everyone’s skin. You couldn’t fathom why people liked him in the first place.
Lando, who was leaning on his elbow on his bed, gave a hum of response. He only had half of his mind present as he watched you get ready. “Surely, this can’t be fair,’ He asked.
You raised a brow at him through the mirror. “What?” You queried before putting on a necklace. Sorry, attempting to. You weren’t exactly sure why the clasps of necklaces were made so poorly.
Lando got up from the bed and walked up behind you. He grabbed the necklace from your hands with an amused expression before bringing it to your neck. With one hand, he pushed your hair to the side and joined the clasp to the metal ring. He rested his fingers on the back of your neck, slowly rubbing the area as he met your gaze in the mirror.
“I mean, you get to wear this,” Lando started. His hands ran over the satin silk material of your black dress. It was fairly casual, landing mid-thigh. Perfect enough for you to blend into the crowd. Although, it didn’t matter for Lando. He could always pick you from the crowd. Especially, if you were wearing this. “And I wear this? It doesn’t seem fair,” he whispered into your ear.
You let out a small laugh, eyeing his new uniform for the season. You turned to face him, rubbing your hands over his chest and pretending to dust it. “I think you look quite good, love.”
Lando narrowed his eyes. You felt his hand travel up your neck and to your lips. “When did you even buy this? It wasn’t even in your closet?”
Your heart started to pace when you caught that knowing glint in his eyes. His mended brows seemed to ease when you didn’t respond. Sometimes you didn’t need to open your mouth to say anything. Instead, you let your eyes talk.
A small grin came to his face. He turned you to face the mirror. His hands came alive, roaming your thigh and waist. “Just for me, huh?” Lando smiled.
“Lando,” you warned weakly. You had a feeling where this was going. Honestly, you weren’t opposed to it. But the both of you needed to clock in soon. “It’s supposed to come off after the launch.”
Lando pursed his lips, pressing a kiss to the side of your neck and meeting your gaze. “Oh, it supposed to come off too? Jesus, I don’t think I can’t wait that long.”
Lando could feel the perfume he has come to love so much infiltrate his nose. God, this dress and now the perfume. How on earth was he going to get out of here?
“Fuck,” He murmured out. He closed his eyes and rested his chin on your shoulder. He needed to get himself together. But the thing about your skin was that it was so inviting… so warm.
You felt his his arms wrap around your waist as you added some finishing touches to your look. Lando pouted at you through the mirror.
“What’s wrong, baby?” You cooed, squishing his cheeks with your free hand.
“I don’t think I can leave this room. I can’t,” Lando groaned, starting a line of kisses on your neck.
“Lando…” You whimpered out pathetically, feeling your neck stretch out even more willingly. You could feel him close in on the one area near your ear.
“Fuck, Lando. Not there,” You swore but with no effort to stop him.
Lando’s greed seem to increase upon your exclaim. He furthered his attack on the spot, sucking enough of your intoxicating skin, not only to get his full but leave a fresh purple mark.
Now he was satisfied enough to leave the room.
You watched his lips leave your skin, almost leaving you to pour for a second before that dark spot on your skin caught your eyes.
You gasped. “You didn’t,” you said in disbelief, whacking your boyfriend.
Lando’s blues twinkled at you as he planted a cheeky kiss to your cheek. “I did.”
Now you were in a room of all these people. It was exhilarating for Lando to know that he had given you a tattoo of some sorts. To attend those interviews and know that behind your carefully placed hair, he had given you something no one else would ever… yeah, he was aching to leave.
It wasn’t any less for you. Even last night you couldn’t keep your hands off each other. You were walking around with the fact that you knew what was underneath the damn racing gear. The scratches and indentations of your hands on his skin caused by the will to bring Lando even closer to you.
all of this silence and patience, pining and anticipation
my hands are shaking from holding back from you… ha, ah, ah
all of this silence and patience, pining and desperately waiting
my hands are shaking from all this… ah, ha, ha, ha
Lando was looking at you probably more than one should look at their PR specialist to the point he was sure you could feel his eyes on you.
But he couldn't help. Every little thing you did in that dress had caught his attention.
Your pinky-red painted lips covering the champagne glass you held. Those lips he wanted for himself. On him. Everywhere. Now.
The occasional brush of your hands that sent shudders he had to surpress.
The lights of the venue practically spotlighting you so everyone could see how beautiful you looked. So Lando could see exactly how nicely the dress clung to everyone of those damning curves.
The polite smiles you offered every single person you met. A gesture that sent his heart racing.
The forced polite laughter and chuckles you gave to the people that flirted with you. A gesture that made him both proud and frustrated. Proud in that you were clearly faking it because he knew what your real smile and laugh was. Hell, he had the pleasure of making it everyday. And that people clearly found you as beautiful as he did. Frustrated because people were clearly into you and he could do nothing but watch in silence.
Lando couldn't blame them either. If he was them, he too would've stopped to impress. But he didn't need to. Not when you were his entirely and he yours.
The more he looked at you the more his hands shook and his patience wore thin. His hands ached for this day to end, for him to take you to his room, and remove that goddamn dress.
He could imagine what his former teammates Carlos and Daniel say. Something along the lines of "stop staring at her like you want to eat her".
Which, in all honestly, wasn't true.
Lando didn't want to eat you. He wanted to devour you. Slowly and gently. He wanted to appreciate you... all of you. So much that only his name was falling from those beautiful lips of yours.
say my name and everything just stops
i don't want you like a best friend
only bought this dress so you could take it off
take it oh, ha, ha, ha-ah
carve your name into my bedpost
'cause i don't want you like a best friend
only bought this dress so you could take it off
take it oh, ha, ha, ha-ah
Lando couldn't imagine the poor luck he had. The event was finally over and he was home. Without you.
You had become slightly tied with some last minute discussions with the reporters and journalists, even your dear favourite Will.
Which meant for the past hour, Lando had nothing but his thoughts. Thoughts that consisted only of you, that dress, and what he was going to do with you.
What was he supposed to do?
Unbothered to put on a new change of clothes, Lando was in bed only in his boxers which had a very obvious bulge.
Lando let out a sigh, his hand brushing over his clothed cock. "Fuck," he muttered out through a clenched jaw. If it was any other day, he would've lost all self-control and jerked off to his thoughts of you. But you were going to be home soon and he desperately wanted to feel you.
"Lando? Honey, I'm home!" Your voice echoed through his house, teasing him.
Lando whipped his head up, feeling all his thoughts and emotions briefly stop as he darted towards the entrance.
You were taking of your heels when you saw Lando stand in all his glory almost naked. You couldn't help but laugh lightly. "Oh my... I thought we discussed you not walking around the house naked, Lando."
Lando said nothing. Instead, he took a step towards, eyes searching your face and arms encircling your body closer to him.
The hairs on your body stood straight while goosebumps started to sprawl across your skin. Lando's thumb brushed across your bottom lip. "You were later than expected," He said in a tone that almost neared a whine.
You let out a sigh, kissing the tip of his thumb. "I know. I'm sorry, baby."
Lando grinned. "It's okay," He quipped before scooping you up in his arms.
You let out a yelp before smiling as Lando ventured to your bedroom. You could soon feel the soft sheets of your bed touch your skin while Lando hovered over you.
"You have to tell me what the deal with this dress is, love," Lando whispered. His finger slid under the strap of your dress before trailing all the way down to your bare breast.
You opened your mouth to answer but not even a hint of a sound came out as Lando's finger circled your nipple gently. You met his eager blue eyes, waiting for answer.
"I only bought this dress so you can take it off. Simple as that."
Lando let out a low exhale, feeling his cock harden even further. God, were you even real?
"Yeah?" He hummed, pushing the straps of your dress down your arms. He pushed his face down lower, wrapping his lips around your nipple as he continued to pull your dress down your body.
Your back arched on the bed, pushing yourself into his mouth even further. Without a word, you lifted your hips up and Lando had fully taken the dress off.
His other hand reached your other nipple, paying it an equal amount of attention. He rolled the pebbled mound between his thumb and index finger, giving it a slight squeeze.
You let out a small whimper. Your hand navigating through his short curls. You could feel your core tighten and your pussy become slick with your arousal.
Lando unlatched his lips from your breasts, using both hands to gently thumb your nipples. "Tell me want you want, love. I want to hear it from these pretty lips."
God... you couldn't even decide. "I don't know. I want your lips. Your fingers. Fuck, I want it all."
Lando couldn't help but grin as a he felt a surge of energy rush through. "I can do it all," He chuckled before bringing his lips to yours. His tongue darted between your lips and into your mouth. His hands trailed up and down your waist while a muffled moan came out of his mouth.
You kissed him back with the same intensity of fervor, bringing your hands around his neck, willing him closer to you.
Lando could tell by the slight squirm of your legs, you were getting impatient down there. Slowly, he trailed down your waist and reached your panties. His own lips quirked at the damp material. Pressing his fingers into your core, he could feel a shudder overcome you.
Lando continued his assault on your lips as he rubbed you through your panties.
You removed your lips in a gasp for air. "Don't tease, Lando," You moaned out, clenching your thighs so it trapped his hand to your pussy.
Lando chuckled. He used his free hand to brush over your swollen lips. God, he wanted those lips around his cock. Maybe tomorrow morning. Or maybe in the shower tonight. Right now, he wanted to focus on you. "Say please. A good girl should always use her manners, no?"
This good girl thing had always infuriated you. It felt childish. But then it paled in comparison to the tingling and blossoming sensation of Lando's fingers rubbing your clit.
But of course, if you were going to be a good girl, you were always going for extra credit.
"Please, Lando. Fuck. I need your fingers. Please. I love the way they fill me up. The way they feel in me. Please."
Lando wanted to grin. But all he could do was groan in response. How could he not reward his dear overachiever?
His fingers pulled down your panties, snatching down the damp material past your legs. A guttural sound of pure sin fell from his mouth as he saw your pussy. It glistened in front of him, almost as if it was flooded. Sliding his fingers down those soaked folds, he watched you writhe under him and whimper.
Lando kept his eyes on you as he pushed two fingers into you slowly. He could feel your core envelope him and welcome him graciously. He watched your back arch once he began thrusting into a pace, feeling your walls clench around his fingers.
"Shit," you moaned, reaching for your breasts to both add even more pleasure and bring some sort of sanity. "Faster, baby. Please."
Lando sped up the pace of his fingers, bringing his thumb to rub your clit. His eyes flickered to your pussy. He licked his lips. You were swollen and engorged. Your puffy lips continuously took him in and it was almost paining his cock that he wasn't inside you yet.
A new intense wave of euphoria settled over you. Your body convulsed with a buzz that provided the almost silent moans from your mouth. "Fuck.... I... I'm gonna come," You moaned out, head falling back as your mind became clouded with pleasure.
Lando's cock throbbed from not being touched. He could do it no longer.
The whine you released when Lando took his fingers out of you almost made him want to put them back in. But instead, with a speed he had never even found in his car, he took off his boxers and hovered over your body.
"I know. I know," Lando murmured, pressing his lips into yours to silence your begging plea.
You placed your own fingers in your mouth, drenching them in your saliva. Removing them, your hand travelled down his waist, brushing past his v-line before circling your hand around his cock. You could feel Lando moan into the kiss, briefly stilling at your touch.
Slowly you rubbed him up and down, dangerously thumbing the slit of his cock. You watched as your saliva lubed him, giving him a unique shine. Your shine.
"Jesus fucking christ," Lando moaned out. He was sure if you kept up like this, he was going to cum in your hands rather than inside you.
"Fuck, as much I love your hands and touch. I need to be in you, baby," Lando sighed, removing your hand from his cock and slowly pressing into your body to slide his cock up and down your pussy.
You moaned at his words, feeling his lips wrap around your nipple once again.
"Stop teasing," You panted. The buzz created by the tip of his cock rubbing your clit was almost paining and torturous.
Lando didn't even mean to tease. But even just feeling your pussy felt like a different type of high. He groaned, pushing the tip of his cock into your swollen lips. A rush of warmth surged through him as he laid in you for a brief moment.
Your pussy was a safe haven. A cocoon made for his cock. This high... this pleasure... he could feel it with no one than you.
You sobbed in ecstasy. Lando was almost bring cruel. You raised your hips, fucking yourself onto your cock.
Lando had to keep himself above you, almost collapsing at your action. He let out a small laugh at your impatience before he started to move in you.
As he thrusted into you, you could feel his cock glide through your folds, reaching those familiar areas of arousal. You clenched your walls around him teasingly, silently urging him to speed.
"Fucking hell," Lando hissed out, speeding up the movement of your hips.
Sweat and arousal doused the both of you as the room was full of your pants and the obscene sound of your skin slapping.
"I'm gonna cum soon, baby," Lando said once you clenched around him once again. This clenching action always drove him overboard. It pulled him in even further into you and pressured his cock to pulse inside of you.
"It's okay. Cum with me," You moaned, bringing him into a sloppy kiss.
Your muffled moans became impossibly higher as Lando rutted into you at a merciless speed. The wave of pleasure and euphoria that had sprawled across the both of you was inexplicable. A transient unearthly state of mind. A paradox of what was holy and unholy.
Your hands had found their way to Lando's back. Your fingernails dug lightly into the smooth skin of his back. You dragged them down as your hips bucked higher in the chase of the climax.
"Fuck! Lando!" You cursed.
Lando could feel his cock twitch and throb inside you. The nails. His name. Your lips. It was any second now. "Fuck. Say my name, Y/N!"
'When your eyes had started to roll, you blinked focusing on the most beautiful boy in front of you. God he was a sight to behold. Blue eyes hooded with lust, lips swollen and puffy... albeit sweaty, but handsome nonetheless. 'When your eyes had started to roll, you blinked focusing on the most beautiful boy in front of you. God he was a sight to behold. Blue eyes hooded with lust, lips swollen and puffy... albeit sweaty, but handsome nonetheless.
"Lando!" You moaned, "I love you so much, Lando! Fuck!"
Your loud groans disturbed the quiet peace of the air as Lando and you felt the wave of euphoria hit you hard, his hips stilled within you. His body shook, warming your walls and folds with an influx of white.
Lando let out a soft moan, chin falling into your shoulder while both your sweaty bodies pressed together. You could still feel Lando's cock within you, giving every last dribble of cum to you.
"I love you, I love you, I love you.," Lando's hoarse voiced mantra made it's way into your ear. He planted a lazy kiss onto your shoulder before turning his body to face the ceiling. "Fuck, I love you so much, Y/N."
You turned on the side of your body, leaning on your hand. Your eyes were weighed with exhaustion but nevertheless you smiled at him. "I guess I should buy more dresses often," You joked.
You could feel Lando's body rumble with a gentle chuckle. His hand reached to move your sweat-ridden hair behind your ears. His blue eyes trailed over your face, in awe of how he had gotten this lucky in his life. The woman he loved so much was right next to him and he hoped forever.
Lando smiled at you, bringing your fingers to kiss them. He briefly thought backed to the small box he had managed to hide away in his closet. Three podiums. He was going to get three podiums and make sure that ring adorned your finger.
"Love, I'll buy all the dresses you want. And I'll take them off for you too."
© 𝐌𝐈𝐂𝐊𝐘𝐒𝐂𝐇𝐔𝐌𝐀𝐂𝐇𝐄𝐑
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Hiii, omg first of all I just wanted to say I loved Ur miles morales earth 42 imagine "second chance" like all my days I'm in love. But like anyway I was wondering if I could request another one with him and Spider man miles? Soooo, it's basically where in spider man miles earth the reader died and when he gets to earth 42 (the part where he thought he was back in his own earth) he sees her and try's to apologise for not saving her and that he's so glad she alive but little does he know the reader is actully with earth 42 miles and that miles gets all over protective and jealous???
(Hello! Sure I can and so sorry if this sucks but I hope you enjoy this little drabble!)
Taglist
Not Your Lover
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Miles knew something was wrong, he figured it out immediately, not really, but he did.
He knew he needed to leave. He knew he needed to get home. He wanted nothing more than to get home.
But every thought of leaving and going home, back to his home where his family was, disappeared when he heard the door open.
Home was where he had his family.
But home didn't have you.
"I'm back, Mrs. Morales!"
Miles froze the second he heard, standing in the hallway before he slowly turned on his heel to see you.
You looked just as beautiful. The same way you did before he couldn't save you.
Miles didn't know what to do, just watching as you left your things by the door, looking around as you walked in before your eyes met his.
Miles almost broke down once your eyes met him, your same smile on your face that you always had for him as you got closer.
"You okay, Miles?" You asked, your smooth voice bringing Miles nothing but comfort as he couldn't help but stare at you.
You looked at Miles confused, Miles couldn't help but to bring himself forward, bringing you into a much needed hug as he buried his face into your neck, almost crying as the familiar scent of your perfume he had gotten you filled his senses.
"Woah!"
Miles held onto you as you said in surprise, not letting go as you slowly hugged him back, he felt your arms around him as he did his best not to cry.
Miles didn't want to do anything but to stay with you, but couldn't as you pulled back, looking at him with seemingly worry as you cupped his cheek.
"Are you feeling okay?" You asked, concerned as Miles almost didn't hear you, barely shaking his head.
"No- yeah. I'm okay." Miles barely muttered out, eyes darting over your entire face, not wanting to look away in fear you would leave as you did before.
"Okay, then." You gave him a weird look before you smiled, brushing off his weird behavior as you took his hand, leading him out and to the stairs.
"Come on. I made something for you."
Miles could hear you say as you walked up the stairs quickly, like you always did, leaving him behind for a moment.
"Hey, wait up!" Miles called after you, desperate to not let you out his sight but stopped in pain as he glitched, groaning in pain as he leaned into the railing.
"Miles?"
Miles looked up to see you standing above the flight of stairs, looking at him weirdly.
Miles saved himself, waving his hand to dismiss your worry as he climbed after you quickly.
You got to the roof first, Miles coming through the door not far after.
"Hey-" Miles tried once more before he stopped himself, looking around the roof, the changes evident as he looked back and forth.
That wasn't everything that was new.
Miles couldn't help but look at the brick wall, staring for a moment before a passing by train lit it up, giving just enough time for Miles to see the painted face.
The face no longer was Uncle Aaron and you.
But instead was Miles' dad.
Miles couldn't look away, his wide eyes staring at the portrait of his dad.
He didn't save his dad. His dad was gone.
He needed to go home. He had to go home.
Miles couldn't move, his feet planted to the floor.
Miles only turned when he remembered you were there, he slowly turned his head, expecting to see anything but he got nothing.
Your face was changed, everything was different now as any aspect he saw of his (Name) was gone, replaced by someone else he didn't know.
Miles wanted to deny it, but the way you looked at him before a small smirk came onto your face rendered him, every spider sense screaming for him to get the hell out.
Suddenly, you whistled a soft tune. Your cunning smile still on your face as you walked around Miles, his eyes following you, a mistake.
Miles watched as a figure dressed in a familiar but different suit jumped from the rooftop of another building, Miles thought to escape but couldn't, already punched down to the floor.
"Too bad. He's pretty cute."
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Miles woke up with a pain, his body felt constricted and his sight blurred as everything hurt.
He couldn't remember where he was or what happened for a moment before his eyes shot open, the panic setting in.
Miles was chained to a punching bag, looking around frantically before he saw you.
Your back was turned to him, working at a desk peacefully.
Miles breathed heavily, panicking as he moved around, making the chains clink together and catching your attention.
You perked up quickly, turning around to look at him as you took out an earphone, looking him over like he was some sort of joke.
You then smiled, a smile he once loved, but a smile he now couldn't place and one he was growing to hate.
You whistled softly once more, a soft alert as you put down everything onto the desk, now leaning against it as you waited.
Miles was too stunned to speak, trying to find the words before he stopped as he looked up, seeing the one who rendered him unconscious now hanging from a support beam, dropping down quickly.
Miles stared at him as he stared back, his masked face concealing his identity.
Miles watched almost fearfully as panic rose again, spider senses hay-wire as the masked one got closer, close enough for Miles to look at his face directly.
"Take off the fucking mask. It's not scaring anyone, babe."
Miles glanced at you, seemingly shocked and hurt as you called him babe.
But Miles was even more shocked as he heard the one in the mask sigh, the mask coming off a moment later to stun Miles even more.
Under the mask, resided his face.
Miles Morales' exact copy was under the mask, or at least, him in this world.
Miles could only watch as the formerly masked Miles glared at him before his copy walked over to you, forced to watch as you smiled up at him.
Miles could feel his heart beating and almost cracking as you glanced at him, the same smug smile on your lips as your Miles stood close to you.
Your Miles slipped his hand onto your neck, kissing your forehead before he went to your lips, and greedily, you accepted his kiss.
Miles knew a lot in his life, and that was that he loved his (Name) and she loved him.
You were not his (Name).
His (Name) died for him.
You would be the death of him.
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writa-anon · 8 days
Text
"is that.. supposed to be me?"
francis mosses (the milkman) x artist!reader
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a / n ~ boom! first fanfic :3 i was a little inspired by uh.. myself LOL when i started playing tnmn i realized i was horrible at memorizing faces so i started drawing the characters to help me remember and it works sooo much. but anyway, super cute oneshot where they first meet, hope u enjoy :D
content included ~ isaack mauss, francis mosses, reader is an artist and doorman, no pronouns mentioned for reader, use of (y/n), shy n wholesome first encounter
˚₊· ͟͟͞͞➳❥ 4.10.24 | 1.6k words
─── ・ 。゚☆: *.☽ .* :☆゚. ───
“Another slow day at work, huh?”
A enthusiatic-ridden voice boomed, instinctively making me look up to meet the gaze of a strong-jawlined man. I cleared my throat and placed my pencil on the scratchy sheet of paper, sitting up in my chair.
“Good afternoon, Mr. Gauss.” I greeted, grinning that customer-service smile.
“Good afternoon, (y/n). I assume work is treating you well?” He said before sliding both his ID and request form through the letter hole. “Only your third day and you’re occupying yourself with side hobbies!” He exclaimed, squinting a little to see my doodle through the glass screen. I chuckled a little as I examined his ID.
“Eh, yeah..” I sighed. “But this actually helps with my job, believe it or not!” I said proudly, pulling out the floor 2 folder to compare his ID number. “I’ve been drawing neighbors in order to remember their features better. It’s especially helpful because of my terrible memory.” I said, shaking my head. Isaack simply chuckled as I placed the folder to the side as I went through his request form.
“That’s pretty smart.” He commented. “Who have you drawn so far?” He asked, curiously tilting his head. As I went through the checklist as I idly thought to myself.
“Umm..” I hummed. “The Schmitts and the Mikaelys are definitely in here.” I finished up the last check before rolling back to my sketchbook, using my finger to thumb through the pages.
“Unfortunate. I haven’t been drawn yet.” He faked pouted. I rolled my eyes before flipping one or two pages before presenting the portrait to him.
“I’m not necessarily finish. Your face is pretty hard to encapture.” I sighed, looking at the smears of led blended together. Isaack was something of a character: a big prominent smile that is not hard to catch a glimpse of in a room full of people. His hair perfectly styled each morning that still manages to maintain its shape by the end of the day. His voice had depth to it, almost like he was born to be the daily news reporter for radios and TVs of all kind. He stared at the drawing in satisfied awe before leaning back.
“Wow, it surely is accurate!” He beamed. I smiled proudly before placing my sketchbook down.
“Thank you,” I politely nodded. I slid his ID back through the letter box. “Everything seems to be good to go. You’re allowed in, Mr. Gauss.” He nodded in his head in gratitude, but however, did not my window just yet. He took a minute to ponder, as if contemplating his next move, before beaming his teeth once again.
“Ah, before I go,” he quickly inputed. “is there by chance Francis Mosses is on today’s list? He’s the local milkman around here.”
I raised my eyebrow a little, not exactly sure as to why Isaack chose to bring up this person’s name. I shook my head gently before folding my arms in front of me. “I’m sorry, Mr. Gauss, but I’m afraid I cannot disclose that information for you.”
“—Ah, of course.” Isaack quickly fixed himself, putting his hands up a little in defense. “I understand. I was just curious is all. I’m sure you know him though, no?” Thinking for a minute, I’ve realized that this is a neighbor I have not encountered yet.
“No, actually..” I pondered out loud. “Huh, that’s interesting. I guess he works a morning or night shift because the name doesn’t really ring a bell.” I noted out loud.
“Interesting.” He muttered. “Well, keep the name in mind. He’s a rather interesting person, and I think you would find him just as interesting.” Before I could say anything else, he gestured a quick wink before walking through the unlocked door. I quickly snapped out my thoughts before locking the door back up again.
Isaack never really mentioned other names— it wasn’t necessarily out of character, but it felt a little outlandish. I looked down to see my pencil in hand again and blank surface of paper. My eyes trailed over to the paper taped on to the wall next to my window, realizing that Frances was in fact on today’s check-in list. Out of curiousity, I located his room number before surfing through the folders. After locating folder 3 and apartment 02, I was able to find more about him.
He was a slim, tall man with a crooked nose and ruffled brown hair. His eye bags were prominent from what I assume to be lack of sleep. As I stared at his picture, my hand moved by itself across my sketchbook, forming a circle to start defining out the headshape. I squinted slightly, trying to feel for each detail in his face. From the way his eyebrows were rotated a little outward, defining more of his tired expression, to the bump in his nose bridge, making it a bit more interesting to draw. It was mesmerizing, almost wishing I could sit here and draw his face in perso—
tap, tap!
I nearly jumped out of my seat. The pencil flung out of my hand, rolling off of the desk. My eyes flickered up—
and there he was.
My breath near caught in my throat as I stared up in shock. The man behind the glass was barely shocked to see my reaction. His white “milkman” hat rested perfectly on top of his brown hair with small curls slightly peaking out. I was swift to regain my composure in my head as I folded my hands in front of me with my legs crossed under the desk.
“Good afternoon, sir.” I smiled. “I haven’t seen you before. ID and entry request?”
He let out a small hum, barricaded by his pink lips, as he took out his paper and ID. He politely slid them through the letter slot before I took the items to examine.
“Mr. Francis Mosses.. Lives on floor 03.. Room 02.. Coming from work as a milkman.” I glanced up to look at him, comparing the photo ID to his face. His expression was exactly alike: tired eyes, slight frown on the lips, crooked nose, and a clean shaven face. I double checked with his file already on my desk, making sure that the ID numbers and the description aligned with his ID. “Everything looks good.” I confirmed as I slid his ID back to him.
“Mmm.. Thank you.” He hummed. I turned around to place his request form in a folder, but once I sat back up, I realized he was still standing at the window, curiously staring through the glass. I raised my eyebrow a little, confused as to why he was still lingering.
“I’m sorry, did I forget something?” I asked. Francis shook his head before pointing down at my desk.
“Is that.. Supposed to be me?” He asked. A tiny bit of emotion seeped into his voice, dripping in interest and curiousity.
“I— oh—” I looked down to see the rough drawing of Francis sitting at my desk, drawn with sketch lines still lightly defining his features, while the harder drawn areas sculpted his prominent details. “Yeah..” I mumbled. “I-I’m sorry if it makes you uncomfortable!” I exclaimed. “It’s just a way to help me remember faces and I was going through the files and I realized I haven’t met you before so I—”
“You make me look so pretty.” He mumbled, almost breathlessly. A faint pink color brushed his cheeks as he was unable to take his gaze away from the paper.
“W-Well.. I do aim for accuracy.” I chuckled, complimenting the man right back. My nerves had calmed down after noticing his calm demeanor. “You could keep it, if you’d like that is.” I offered. It would be awkward if I kept the drawing rather than give it to him— I mean— this is his first time ever seeing me and it was an awkward first interaction right off the bat. It was the least I could do for him. Francis nodded his head and in response, I tore the piece of paper out of the scrapbook before sliding it through the letter slot.
“There you go.” I smiled.
“Thank you..” He replied, graciously taking the piece of paper and admiring it once again. “Oh— um,” He quickly looked up to me. “What is your name? I’m sorry, I’m not really good with.. Introductions.” He trailed off, but something about his shyness and reluctant voice made me grin even harder.
“My name is (y/n). I’m the doorman in training for this building.” I greeted.
“Ah, of course. I’m Francis— Mmm..Though you already know that.” He said, shaking his head a little by the end of his sentence.
“Well, it was nice meeting you, Francis. I’ll be seeing you around, I assume?” I said, sitting at the edge of my chair as I looked up at him.
“More often than before.” He smiled. It was the widest he’d grin throughout our whole conversation. Something inside me told me that he doesn’t pass around smiles like that easily. It made me feel accomplished in some sort of way. But with that, he departed from my window. I made sure to unlock the door and listen for the door closing behind him before locking it again.
Francis Mosses.
I think I have someone to look forward to on tomorrow’s entry list.
─── ・ 。゚☆: *.☽ .* :☆゚. ───
really hoped you enjoyed! replies, reblogs, and even likes are super appreciated! thank you so much for reading :]
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arminsumi · 8 months
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HELLOOO THERE!! Can I request gojo dating reader because of a bet with suguru and falling for reader, reader doesn’t know and was hurt when they overheard they’re just a bet, angst to fluff pls 🫶🫶🫶
thank youuuu, hope your having a good day!!
˗ˏˋ꒰ 🍒 ꒱
𝐈𝐭 𝐦𝐞𝐚𝐧𝐭 𝐞𝐯𝐞𝐫𝐲𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐠
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A/N: u have no idea how much i LOVE this idea anon!!! 💗💗💗 i really hope i did it justice 😩
Wc ≈ 1.4k
Pairing: GOJO Satoru x f.reader
Summary: Suguru betted that Gojo could make anyone fall in love with him, even someone who was his complete opposite — like you.
Warnings; angst-to-fluff, angst contents — {self-loathing (Gojo), crying, heartbreak}, a little bit suggestive at the end, kissing/making out
♪ michelle
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It was nice while it lasted.
The handholding in public, the stolen cheek kisses, the pampering and spoiling, relishing in the jealous looks thrown your way when he fed you bites of his food in the cafeteria, bathing in Gojo Satoru's affection. A lot of people would have killed for your position, or even a glimpse into what it's like to date your college's biggest heart throb.
You two seemed to really like each other. It was like two mismatched puzzle pieces somehow fitting together — a fascinating connection was shared. No one would have put you and him together, not even Gojo.
The only reason he asked you out in the first place was...
"Suguru, that's such a nasty idea... I love your mind."
"Just don't actually fall in love with her. The whole idea of this bet is that you can prove any girl can fall in love with you, don't forget that."
Gojo had chuckled at this, it seemed so ridiculous.
Why would he actually fall in love with you? You weren't even his type. He never paid you a sparing glance, not at school, not at parties, not around town.
You weren't his type...
So why did his heart start panging excitedly a few months into your 'fake' relationship? Why did he swoon when you fell asleep laid on his chest in his dorm room? Why did he want to kiss you so badly every time he saw your face? Why did he jump like a cat whenever he got a text from you? Why did he kiss you like the world was ending?
And why did he cry when you found out the truth? He looked distraught when Suguru let the secret slip.
Why did Gojo Satoru, the strongest, beg on his knees for you to stay when you were about to walk away?
"Please! I'm so sorry! I know it was so wrong and fucked up — shit I regret it so much — I really like you! I swear to god, I swear on my life!"
You choked on your tears so badly that you could barely talk. "I can't believe you. This is such a fucking horrible th - thing to do to s - someone, Gojo."
He felt so hurt that you went back to calling him Gojo and not Satoru, like you used to when the two of you were just mild acquaintances.
"Don't go!" He almost yelled.
His arms wrapped around your midriff, he slid down like he was too weak to support himself — like his legs went limp. He slid down until he was clinging to your legs. He sobbed with such a genuine-looking crying face that you almost believed it. He wasn't play-crying like he does to get attention or persuade people, he was ugly-crying.
Gojo Satoru, the prettiest boy you ever knew, was an ugly-crier. A string of saliva glistened between his canines, his mouth hung open like a dramatic renaissance portrait of a distraught man. His eyes were pinched so tight that fat tears cascaded out the corners.
"Please don't go!"
⁕⁕⁕
Suguru found his best friend sat in the middle of the campus' main stairs. Desolate. One hand holding up his heavy head. Regretful. eyes closed.
"So it didn't go well?"
Satoru didn't raise his head, but he slowly opened his eyes and looked miserably at the floor. He watched a line of ants.
"It went as horribly wrong as you could imagine." he responded eventually.
Suguru came to sit next to him. "Are you really in love?" he asked him seriously.
"Of course I fucking am! — sorry..." Satoru snapped, then immediately mumbled an apology.
A long summer breeze went by.
"Try again." he suggested, "I'm sure she'll - "
"She fucking hates me."
There was a heavy silence after Satoru said that.
"If I were her, I'd hate me too." Satoru muttered.
Suguru went silent. He felt guilty, after all, he was the one that dared his best friend to do something as stupid as play with your heart.
Satoru watched the ants scurrying along. He felt as puny and weak as one right then. The realization of these feelings themselves are what urged him to abruptly stand up.
"I'm not giving up. I'm gonna explain to her that I really did fall in love — that I really do fucking like her so god damn much it's insane and stupid."
"That's the spirit — where are you going?" Suguru asked curiously as Satoru began heading over to the parking lot.
"I'm gonna go bring her flowers and... stuff..." he replied unsurely.
Will that really work? He wondered to himself.
"But it's gonna rain." Suguru said, "Heyyy, Satoru, listen don't just — ah, there he goes... idiot really fell in love when I warned him not to..." he muttered pitifully.
⁕⁕⁕
There was a knock at your apartment door.
You wrung it open to reveal a heartbroken Gojo Satoru, soaked-through with rain, standing in the downpour, panting while holding onto a bouquet of vividly red roses. You couldn't have witnessed a more dramatic scene in a movie.
His hair was completely flat with wetness. There were raindrops running down his cheeks and dripping off his chin.
On the walk to your apartment, Satoru had mentally written a speech for you.
It was definitely a well-rehearsed heartbroken boy's 'take me back' speech. Flawless and direct. Surely it would have sufficed.
But he didn't say even the first few words of his practiced speech when your door flew open.
All he did was break down crying and fall to his knees right in front of you, like some dramatic actor — except he wasn't acting, you could feel the realness of his regrets and miseries through each sob.
"Satoru..." you looked down at him pitifully. "Come inside, you're gonna get sick." you said tenderly.
For some reason, those very small words communicated more emotions than any form of 'I love you' ever could.
⁕⁕⁕
His pretty nose was slightly upturned. You noticed that when he first kissed you after your third date.
You noticed it again when you observed how red it had become from crying and sneezing.
Wrapping a blanket around him. Drying his hair. Fluffing it with your fingers. Making him some tea. Sitting him down on your bed. Putting on a movie. Letting him curl up into your arms — something he never did when you two were 'dating' because he was convinced he had to show off his dominance to win you over.
All of this together settled the air between you two. But it still didn't explain everything.
"Why'd you do something so dumb?" you asked him half-humorously.
He nibbled and chewed on his lip, eyes on the TV — not really, actually they were looking at your subtle reflection within it.
"I'm an asshole." he admitted.
"You don't say." you chuckled.
He felt bad, and uncurled his body and raised his face to look at you. Satoru never wore a serious expression in all the time you've known him, both as acquaintances and 'lovers' — except for now, which is how you know it's true.
"I wasn't supposed to fall in love with you. Suguru dared me because... well, because it seemed comical. We're opposites, no one would ever put us together right? But he and I thought that was a hilarious challenge. We wanted to see if I could catch you and make you fall in love with me, or something like that..."
He started mumbling his words and refused to look at you.
"Satoru."
"Yeah?"
He reared his head up at you.
"Did it mean something to you, the time we spent this summer?"
He didn't hesitate to respond, "It meant everything." he said.
"Well, then there we go." you said with a little smile.
"Am I being forgiven...?"
"Mhm."
He seemed taken aback and unsure. Was he really being forgiven? Were you reversing the script on him and pulling a trick on him now?
"Does this mean..." he mumbled quietly, "... that I'm allowed to kiss you right now?" he asked nervously, heart panging, eyes giving your lips a longing glance.
"You're such an idiot." you sighed, "Yeah of course it means you can kiss m — mmmf!"
You never managed the rest of your words out, they all got muffled on Satoru's lips. His hand came to cup your right cheek, fingers caressing your skin like you meant everything to him. He tilted his head into the kiss, broke apart for air, dove back in, kissed you feverishly fervently violently eagerly — with so much affection and thankfulness that you almost couldn't breathe due to being smothered.
"Sorry..." he panted after breaking the kiss, bottom lip glistening with saliva. "I'm sorry for breaking a heart as good as yours."
"Just don't do it again." you told him in a whisper.
The poor boy, two days without kissing was really too much for him. He went right back in and kissed you blue, until you gasped and subconsciously wrapped your legs around his slim waist and pulled him closer. His whole body felt hot and eager. You tasted so good, you looked so good, you loved him so good — he decided right there in the back of his mind that he'd marry you after graduation.
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