#alloarophobia

[entropy-sea-system]

As an atertiary alloaro, I just have to say that despite allosexuality being the default, people are extremely hostile towards it when its not accompanied by other attractions like romantic, platonic, etc. Especially the conformist queer crowd that thinks its so progressive to throw us under a bus as the 'degenerates' and 'perverts' the queer community is characterised as by bigots.

There's actually nothing wrong with being a sexual person. If you think that, thats on you. Ask yourself why you're so concerned about labelling ppl as 'perverts' or 'degenerates' just for liking sex or not having attractions that don't involve sexual attraction. Dragging down other queer people isn't going to make you any more 'palatable' to bigots.

#alloaro #alloarophobia #sex negativity #allosexual #atertiary alloaro #allox #aspec #before you kill me for being an allosexual and posting in the aspec tag or whatever pls remember that aro and atertiary are aspec. not all #aspecs are even ace lol #aroallo #aromantic allosexual #aplatonic alloaro #aromantic #arospec #atertiary #aplatonic

[faelynfawn]

The way that you discuss and consume fictional content does, in fact, have the ability to add harmfully to problems that impact real people.

What about me not mentioning asexuality at all, and actually explicitly stating one of the characters is alloaro, indicates acespec representation?

It does not. Because there is not any.

This relates to a wider problem with the aspec community acting as though aromanticism is under the asexual umbrella.

I am not asexual. I do love and value the shared community I have with asexuals. I wish I could exist within that community, or even just at the very least clearly discuss allosexual aromanticism without people erasing alloaros from the conversation.

My allosexuality is just as important to me as my aromanticism. I wish there was somewhere I could be both without one aspect of it being erased.

I am so, so exhausted.

#rant #vent #faelyn talks #arophobia #alloarophobia #alloaro #Genuinely what do I have to do to have a community with people who understand my aromanticism without shunning and erasing my allosexuality #I am exhausted.

[aro-culture-is]

Aroallo culture is constantly feeling like a degenerate

I have... more than a few things to say on this topic, but I will restrain myself to the two major points that have caused me to delay posting this.

For one: Internalized sex negativity ahoy!

In all honesty? I genuinely do not understand how sexual attraction without romantic attraction (or any other form of attraction, really) is supposed to be bad. I genuinely cannot tell you how wild it is to think that sexual attraction, one of the instincts that has generally been selected for among all sexual species similar to us, is somehow... morally incorrect? How much must we hate ourselves, see ourselves as the monster in a bedtime story, for the invisible Thought Crime of feeling like another person is attractive? It's okay. Literally the only "bad" is if your actions in response to a feeling are performed in malice or cause harm, and even then there's nuance that requires thought and communication, not mind-reading and assuming others will be disgusted.

Sincerely, please please please look into sex positivity. Read about it. Follow sex positive accounts, movements, and people. Let yourself feel in response, and ask yourself what does and does not speak with you. Engage in the topic. You don't have to believe it right away, but I promise you, it is well worth your time to expose yourself to resources that teach you another perspective that does not demonize the vast majority of the world in some strange and non-productive way, producing shame and little to show for it.

Secondly... degeneracy.

What a very, very loaded word. To summarize some points from Wikipedia, in terms of fact: the concept of degeneracy in this usage originates from the 19th century theory of social degeneration. The concept of heredity had yet to be fully understood in social degeneration's 18th century development, and this movement largely believed that habits of parents changed their child's biology. This, in turn, was used to explain a perceived decline in civilization. It took little time for the theory to appear in medical and zoological works, with the intent to explain why different ethnic groups exist. You may recognize this concept by a directly related one: eugenics.

The theory of degeneracy first grew fame when used to explain racial differences, and quickly spread from the medical field to psychiatry (ie, mentally ill individuals will produce more severely mentally ill children, and therefore should not continue their lineage) and criminology (particularly when combined with phrenology). It was associated with authoritarian political attitudes such as militarism, scientific racism, and support for eugenics. The development of degenerate theory both partially predates and partially follows the works of Gregor Mendel in describing the theory of evolution, and frankly, largely based its so-called scientific backing on incorrect understandings of evolution and poor science, using such understandings to prop up eugenicist beliefs.

Why do I say all this? I think it is very, very important to recognize the sociopolitical bullshit that props up the absolute pseudoscience that social degeneracy revolves around, and to state that anyone who truly believes in degeneracy does not actually have the best interest of other's in mind or heart except that of the current in-groups. if people in your life are using these theories and words, I want to empower you with knowledge that they are, scientifically and historically, very much in the wrong. I want you to be able to look at their words, and understand the context behind their beliefs, even if they themselves do not.

also, real talk: if you can, form other social networks. join a club, play social games, go to community events, anything it takes to experience people outside of those who give you this message. it'll do wonders for you to build social circles outside of that stuff.

tl;dr:

the origins of the theory behind the word "degenerate", as used today, are scientifically bullshit, politically and socially motivated, and largely were used to justify eugenics. i would recommend not trusting people who genuinely believe in degeneracy to have anyone's best interest at heart but their own, and that you are perfectly normal and fine as you are.

#aro culture is #aro #aromantic #actually aro #actually aromantic #ask #mod axel #alloarophobia #internalized alloarophobia #sex negativity cw #long post

[demiro-allosexual-culture-is]

You know the promiscuous character you tried to write into an amatonormative and sex negative 'they have romance now so they are fixed' character arc?? They're demiromantic allosexual now, sorry not sorry I don't make the rules

#demiromantic #amatonormativity #sex negativity #alloarophobia #alloaromisia #demiro #allosexual demiromantic #demiro headcanons #demiro allosexual #alloarospec #demiromantic allosexual #aspec #arospec #aro #aromantic #dia aro #romo aro #demi #demiromanticism

[heartless-aro]

To HIV+ AlloAros:

A lot of alloaros on here have talked a lot about how they face a lot of stigma for wanting to be sexually active while lacking romantic feelings, and how people often stereotype them as uncaring, promiscuous, careless, or irresponsible. I was thinking about this, and it reminded me of some of the sentiments that I’ve heard directed towards people who are HIV+. As such, I would like to take a moment to acknowledge HIV+ alloaros.

To all those allosexual aromantics out there living with HIV, just wanted to say that you are wonderful. You don’t deserve to be stereotyped as reckless or careless or promiscuous or irresponsible, whether you contracted HIV from your first and only sexual partner, from your 30th sexual partner, from IV drug use, or by any other means. You are not wrong or bad or dirty if you have had and enjoyed sex outside of a romantic relationship, even if you are someone who contracted HIV through casual sex. You aren’t “perpetuating stereotypes” (either of alloaro people or HIV+ people) by existing as an HIV+ alloaro. Your sexual feelings are beautiful and natural, and you should never feel ashamed of yourself for having them. You add rich and meaningful perspectives and experiences to the LGBTQ+ community, and we are lucky to have you as part of this community.

I hope that ART works well for you and enables you to live a long, happy life, and enjoy a healthy and active sex life (should you so choose). If you choose to have a zucchini, foveo, FWB, spouse, romantic partner, soft romo partner, or any other sort of partner (or partners!) I hope that they are accepting of your HIV status and that they are able to take PrEP (if needed) with minimal side effects. If sexual intimacy is something that you want, I hope that you and your partner(s) have sex that makes you feel beautiful and sexy and desirable and happy.

I hope that you are able to have children if you so choose, and that your friends and family are accepting of your HIV status.

If you have any symptoms, I hope that they are manageable and that you’re able to continue enjoying the things that make you happy. If you’re struggling with medical trauma due to your HIV treatment experiences, I hope someday you’re able to feel safe seeking medical help again. If you struggle with addiction and contracted HIV due to drug use, then I hope addiction and/or mental health recovery go well for you, should you choose to seek it out.

I hope you’re having a wonderful day, and I hope you have a wonderful life.

(For anyone who has read this far, I’ve added a link below to a list of HIV/AIDS research and relief organizations. Consider donating to one of them if you can!)

#alloaro #aroallo #hiv #hiv/aids #aro #aromantic #sex positivity #addiction #cw drug mention #cw sex mention #serophobia #arophobia #alloarophobia #long post

[samble-moved]

it's been a couple of years since i was actually involved in aspec discourse, but i have something to bring up:

you can't call yourself an aspec inclusionist then not call out people who bash alloaros. you can't call yourself an aspec inclusionist then only include alloaces and aroaces while ignoring the existence of alloaros, or implying we're some "other" that doesn't count as aspec. aromantics who aren't also asexual are aspec, too, and im pretty sick of aspec inclusionists who, when i used to be involved in discourse, seemed mostly perfectly okay with ignoring exclusionists who say or imply things like "alloaros are predatory" or "alloaros who are also gay are homophobic" because they weren't bringing up aces. im not sure if the discourse scene is still like that (or if people still actually do aspec discourse), but if so, please make an effort to not just prop up aces while ignoring alloaros (or condoning exclusionists targeting aros over aces).

#does this post even make sense? it's been a few years since i cared about aspec discourse so idk if it's still even relevant. #alloaro #alloarophobia #aromantic #aro tag #chatter

[urpurplehairedsage]

🍍✨️ Undoing internalized alloarophobia with -Y. ✨️🍍

After the last ask I got, I was inspired to kind of make a guide/question flowchart for anyone dealing with internalized alloarophobia.

I could've made it prettier and more put together, but I'm not even half an artist, so if anyone wants to take this but alloaro-nize the template with some artsy stuff, go ahead! I do take credit for this one, as it took me a while to make.

This might not work for everyone, but I atleast hope it could act as a starting point for anyone who needs it.

Click on the image for better quality!

(This was made by me so please credit me if you're going to post it anywhere else which isn't on Tumblr. Feel free to save for personal use! <3)

-Y.

#🍍✨️ undoing internalized alloarophobia with -Y. flowchart ✨️🍍 #aromantic #aro #arospec #aromanticism #alloaro #aroallo #aromantic allosexual #queer #lgbtqia+ #🍍🍍🍍

[ugly-anarchist]

Getting really sick of the fact that when alloaro issues finally get the recognition they deserve people insist on making it about alloaces too

Alloaces are not in the same boat as alloaros

Alloaces do not experience the same erasure as alloaros do

Alloaces do not experience the same prejudice within the aspec community as alloaros do

Alloaces and alloaros are nothing alike and the two communities are not linked at all other than them both being aspec

Alloaces are The Most Acceptable Form of aspec and comparing alloaro struggles within the community to them is an insult

If your only contribution to anti-alloarophobia is "alloaces (and alloaros) deserve more respect uwu" then you don't actually give a shit about alloaros

#alloaro #aroallo #aromantic #aro #arospec #aspec #aromanticism

[theaceandaroadvocacyproject]

Here is a highlight of our article focusing on Bi Aros! This is apart of our series on Bi aspecs for Bi Awareness Week 2022. You can read the full thing here: https://taaap.org/2022/09/25/bi-aros/

[ID: Bi Aros. “Learn about alloarophobia, learn about biphobia. And just as important, call these things out when you see them!” - Alex. “Just because I can freely be sexually attracted to more than one gender without being romantically involved or interested doesn't make me callous or without feeling.” - Michelle Ridge. “I don't really feel that comfy in the mainstream LGBTQ movement because it is so focused on being respectable. And this is how I feel about most alloromantic bisexual people as well.” - Marie. Pictured is a symbol of bi orientation, the Venus and Mars symbols linked in an infinity sign, in aro green.

Bi Aros. “(J)ust because someone is aro and bi doesn’t mean they sleep around. That is a stereotype for both aromantic and bisexual people, and it needs to be thrown out. Plus, if one is aromantic, bisexual, or both, and they sleep around, there’s nothing wrong with that!” - Ava. “I think being bi-aligned in aro communities has been a positive experience and provoked conversations that were really meaningful to me and for the people I was talking with.” - Mary Kate. Pictured is a bisexual flag with an arrow, in the aro flag colors, over laid on top. End description.]

#bi visibility day #bi awareness week #bi aro #bi aroace #alloaro #aromantic #grayromantic #demiromantic #image described #aro

[entropy-sea-system]

Shut the fuck up if you think sexual attraction just being mentioned is "nsfw" bc it's really not. It's especially alloarophobic if you call it "nsfw" only when it's nonromantic. Fuck you. Is someone detailing sex acts by mentioning sexual attraction? NO. Then why the fuck do you think that's nsfw.

#sex negativity #actually alloaro #alloarophobia #alloaro

[a-romantic--aromantic]

Hey i dont normally set out blocklists, but alloarophobia is exhausting and not tolerated. There is a user i highly suggest blocking.

You should block from both your main and your aro blog, if possible. To block from a sideblog enter https://tumblr.com/settings/blog/URL and then go to blocked users, and press the edit button. Then just type in said user.

To not start a witch hunt, send an ask and ill reapond privately with the user. Stay safe out there.

And remember, alloarophobia isnt tolerated in our community, by anyone, aro or not. We have to take a stand to support alloaros in our community, because without acknowledging and accepting them our community falls apart.

#alloaro #allo aro #stay safe #hey bees

[aro-culture-is]

aro culture is receiving support from the person you trusted most only to see her retiring that support and ghosting you after you told her you were aroallo

:( I'm so sorry

#aroallo-y-la-concha-de-tu-madre #aro culture is #aro #aromantic #actually aro #actually aromantic #ask #alloarophobia

[oflgtfol]

is that guy legit confused by aros liking to fuck... is that legit the dumbass take i'm seeing here.. 😭

no it was lowkey like the alloarophobia and general sex negativity of like, oh sex without romance is selfish and bad, i can understand allo aces because sexless love is puuure uwu, but if you have sex without romantic attraction then youre just an heartless player 💅💅

they phrased it nicer than that, but the person was confused as to how “allo aro is a ‘justified’ orientation” because they knew someone they suspected was allo aro and didnt like them, for the above reasons (of which they were yknow, just Assuming). so basically their cutesy “confusion” about being allo aro was really just repackaged general intra community BS that makes me frustrated with a large portion of the ace community

#i haaaaate talking about intra community discourse bc i know it like. well its very much intra community internet discourse #but also it really is so frustrating and damnit we really do need to talk about the sex negativity that proliferates in certain ace spaces #especially when they target fellow aspecs over it #you dont get to lump us all into one community and then continuously speak out over us or worse actively demonize us #ask #Anonymous #aro tag #anyway because they didnt explicitly say any of this (besides whay i said in the second paragraph) i felt kind of mean reading it into what #they said but everyone in the comments also read it the way i did so i feel justifiee now in being mean about it #like whst the fuck do you mean ‘is allo aro a justified orientation’ are YOU justified to be running your mouth right now?

[saffigon]

"alloarophobia isn't real!!!!!" n "aros aren't queer bc they don't experience discrimination!!!!!"

literally, shut the fuck up, you're just fucking wrong

#tw aphobia #tw arophobia #i'm not like upset upset #but like #annoyed

[clownhubris]

i thought I was ace at first but that was just the internalised alloarophobia so 🤝 on some level

No because me too 🤝 indeed...

#asks #evilneo

[urpurplehairedsage]

So you see people as living flesh lights? Ooh wow yeah, such pride /s

I really wish aros would fuck right off. You’re a bunch of creeps and you’re mad the rest of us just “don’t understand uwu” that you’re a fucking sociopath. Just go to your own island and be cringe on your own without hurting the rest of us. Fuck your serial killer bullshit.

I'm actually dumbfounded, what the actual fuck. This is actually the funniest, yet saddest thing I've encountered all week.

So not only are you sanist as shit, calling me, a whole group of people "fucking sociopaths", you're also a bitch.

People like you constantly come in unprovoked with this revolting, patronizing ass attitude, and think it's slick to remain anonymous to save face, and avoid getting possible backlash.

This is my safe space you invade (not the other way around), to share my experiences being aroallo with others (which isn't hurting anyone by the way), quite literally minding my business, yet you're really out here calling me a serial killer, as in someone who has a streak of murdering people because I'm aroallo?

Seriously? No way you're proud of this.

I just need to know what exactly provoked you to write this, and think, "yeah, this will get 'em."

I'm not even gonna address you accusing me of objectifying people, "seeing them as just living flesh lights(?)." It's plain wrong, but you clearly don't have the common sense to comprehend that.

There's obviously no saving grace for you; try this next time and you can catch this immediate block.

Greetings~! <3

-Y.

#🧙🏾‍♀️'s answers #tw alloarophobia #tw arophobia #aromantic #aro #arospec #aromanticism #alloaro #aroallo #aromantic allosexual #queer #lgbtqia+