#all the worst scenarios and I usually don't even say a lot because I am chronically afraid of saying something wrong and people

[awritersometime]

Can't hide you the truth

Wilhemina Venable x reader

I've got no warnings for this os, it's essentially fluff and a bit silly. I wrote it down using these two prompts "Please, stay on the phone with me." & "Stop telling me you're fine." I've been watching a lot of Modern Family recently, so it's not exactly angsty as one would expect. I hope it's decent anyway. Lemme know <3

It was the third time that I tried to reach out to her, but no answer. I know I shouldn't worry, but it wasn't like her to avoid my calls, especially if insistent. I start thinking about every little scenarios, from the worst to the least worst, with my mind focusing on the first ones obviously. What if she isn't feeling well? Maybe I did something bad without noticing? Could be? I quickly check the date on my phone, think a couple of seconds and no, it wasn't neither our anniversary nor any other special date worth remembering. I squint my eyes in thought. What was happening, then?

I tighten my grip on the wheel and let out a long sigh. On top of all of this, I'm stuck in the traffic, and visibility is partially limited due to the light haze covering the surroundings. I groan, after waiting a couple of extra minutes, "Siri, call Mina, again." I'd have tried to reach out to her on and on if I had to. I silently beg that she answers me, counting each second passing inside my head. In the meantime, I turn on the heating, because my fingers are getting cold due to their stillness on the wheel.

Finally, she answers. When I hear her voice, murmuring a soft "hi, little one", I let out a long breath, I didn't know I was holding. "Mina, hi! I've tried calling you for a while, is everything okay?", I wonder aloud, "Also, I'm stuck in traffic, " I make a face, "I go at a snail's pace if you're wondering and-", I stop a moment, realizing that, as per usual, I'm speaking on and on without giving my girlfriend the opportunity to answer any of my questions. I hear a faint chuckle from her part, when I mutter a faint, "Sorry."

"I was taking a shower, sweetheart, that's why I didn't answer," I frown at the sound of her voice, that appears to be a bit off, tired maybe... but also, kind of restrained. Normally she would tease me, use one of her sarcastic jokes to tell me how silly I am, but none today. "Are you sure it's just that?" It's not that I don't believe her. On the contrary, it's essentially because I do, that I believe there is more to it she isn't saying. Plus, she normally waits for me to take a shower, because it's our thing. One of the moments we share to enjoy the intimacy of one another. Each and every time she reminds me how much she loves to lather and rinse my hair, occasionally leaving sloppy kisses here and there on my skin. Her hands make my stomach flip and my head fly into outer space.

I avert my gaze from the street ahead of me to the phone, tempted to activate the camera, when she hums without giving me a verbal response. "Wilhemina...", I insist, in a sing song tone. She knows that when I use her full name, I'm either concerned or mad. I hope she knows it's not the latter. "Y/n...", she mimics my tone, probably wriggling her eyebrows too. I can't immediately tell if it's an attempt to take the edge off or not. Truth is, she gets particularly annoyed when I insist on asking her how she feels. I've learned to know that the last thing she wants is to feel a burden to me. It doesn't matter how many times I tell her she could never be, that my asking is simply a way to show her I love her. Yet it still doesn't stick in that stubborn head of hers for some reason.

"We have been on the phone for ten minutes and you haven't made any sexual innuendo yet," I point out. I start worrying for real, when she doesn't even chuckle at that. Perhaps, she has a bad back pain? Or maybe those dickheads at work did something bad to her? I need answers or I'll go crazy, "Little one, how many times do I have to tell you I'm fine to make you believe it?", I can tell she is trying to use a more cheerful tone, but it breaks my heart that after all this time she still tries to hide from me. I sigh tiredly, as i slowly massage the root of my nose, "we can continue for all the time you want, or you can just tell me the truth," considering I move at the pace of an ant carrying ten thousand times its weight, I let my guard down and rest my chin over my  arm.

I don't hear her tapping her cane, so I suppose she is sitting somewhere, or maybe she is lying down. She normally would have after an answer like that, but purposefully avoids what I just said, to ask, "Are you still long away? Where are you precisely?", her voice seems to crack a bit when she pronounces her second question. Or maybe it's only my imagination considering she insists on saying she is fine. I blink softly, still taking a mental note on that. "Uhm," I look around me, before answering, "I'm pretty close. If it wasn't for this traffic, I'd be there in five minutes at max. I just passed the florist on the 14th street, " I inform her and she hums. I can almost hear her breathing through the phone. It's like she is clinging to it, keeping it super close to her ear. I can almost see her frowning, her slow blinking.

If the camera was on, I'm sure I'd recognize it in a split second. "Mina...", I voice out softly, "are you in pain, love?", she takes a while to respond, giving me the further proof I didn't need. Yet, she decides to keep lying to me. "No, of course not, why would you think that?"she says flatly. As she speaks I shake my head in slow motion, without beliving a single word that is coming out of her. "Babe...", a bitter smile cracks my lips. I'm hurt honestly, but I push past that pain to focus on hers, "I told you, I'm-", "Stop telling me you're fine." I interrupt her, my voice laced with urgency and deep care. I'm pretty sure she's just rolled her eyes at me now, which puts a brief smile on my face. Wilhemina can be the most stubborn woman in the whole world, when she tries.

I lost count of all the times I reminded her that hiding, lying, pretending serve no good in a committed relationship like ours. It's okay to ask for help. It's okay to be in pain and tell your girlfriend about it. There is no shame in it, but Wilhemina is still so proud to let go to such vulnerabilities without a little fight. "Do you want me to lie to you?", I scoff and say, "You're already doing that, that's why I'd like you to stop," I grin softly, when I hear her groan on the other side of the phone.

Without noticing the car before me has come to an halt. I almost bump into it, but I manage to help it by hitting the brake by force the very last minute. My car boings off a bit and as consequence I bounce on the seat, "Woah, shit!", I curse under my breath, but loud enough for Wilhemina to hear. "Y/n? What happened?", she questions, her voice an octave higher, "Are you alright?", I can't help but melt at her caring tone, "Yeah, all good, still alive unluckily for ya, " a hint of a smile graces upon my lips, when she scoffs and calls me imprudent for getting distracted while driving.

I know how much she hates it when I multitask while on the road, but in my defense, she is giving me enough reason to worry about her with all those unnecessary mysteries. "You should keep your eyes on the street, little one. We can talk once-" I don't let her finish, letting out a loud and urgent, "No!", instead. I sigh and move my finger over my smartphone to activate the camera. When she can see me but in return I'm still facing a black screen, I snort again, "I mean it- I will not let you change the topic, Mina," nothing changes yet. "Can I see my girlfriend or should I speak to a black screen?", I pout and she hums in thought, "Come on!", I insist.

"I'd very much prefer you focused on driving, little one," she says as I hear her sigh, and slowly shift position. Something tells me she was lying down by the sound of the sheets moving underneath her. Now she is sitting up, I'm sure, "Please, stay on the phone with me," I whine, displaying my infallible, fine as hell, pickle lips. I hear a faint chuckle from her. She is probably shaking her head too. I'm dying to kiss that face once I'm back home, "Besides, I can multitask," I add to prove my point. I hear her click her tongue in response, a clear sign she doesn't agree with me, "Like that time you tried to make french toasts and record the episodes of 'Orange is the new Black'?", she teases and I gasp in shock. Each and every time, she uses that story against me to prove a point. "Stop using that story! It's as old as the birth of Rome!"

She chuckles, "It doesn't make it less efficient, though," she retorts making me snort, "If you don't turn on the camera right now I'll scream," I'm playing all the cards at my disposal now, and this one beyond my wild expectations works, "Fine! I wouldn't want to arrange your funeral for bumping into a car that goes about eight miles per hour," I squint my eyes towards her and fake a chuckle. When I finally see her, a sense of guilt rushes over me. She looks... exhausted. Her soft red locks, loose on the shoulders, are still partially damp from the shower. Her eyes looks weary, not fully open either, probably because they carry a mild headache along with the back pain. Her lips, however, are stretched in a placid smile. It feels like she is trying to force some vibrancy out of her. But she doesn't have to, especially when she isn't in the mood. I wish she knew.

"It's the back, isn't it?", I say tentatively and she simply gives me a nod of her head. "m' sorry. I'm almost there, alright?", she cracks a smile, ready to diminish her pain, but I hear none of that, "I'll take care of dinner when I come back. Lie down on the left side, I remember it's the position that is most comfortable to you, then uhm— medicine's in my bedside drawer," I continue, remembering to having put a tin of pills there. She raises an eyebrow at that, "Should I run to the drugstore to get you anything else?", if it wasn't for Wilhemina, I'd probably never stop rambling, especially when it comes to her, "Y/n, for the love of God, just relax," there is some strictness in her tone, that makes me obey like a puppy to her owner.

"I'm a big girl. I don't need a babysitter doing things for me," I know she doesn't mean to be harsh with me. It's the pain speaking for her. Instead of answering to the provocation, I simply smile at her, "Oh I know, you certainly don't need a babysitter, but I do, look--" I point out at the greenish spot on my once white and immaculate blouse, "I stained it with the avocado cream," I feel like coming back to life when her eyes soften and she lets out a quiet, low chuckle, while shaking her head, "Why am I not surprised?", she hums amusedly, and I stick my tongue out at her in response. "Have you been working like that all day long?", she wonders in disbelief, while I nod solemnly, "Yep, ma'am," I say, popping the "p" childishly, "Add the laundry to the list of things you have to do once you come back," she teases and I giggle softly, "Fist things first," I say, with a wink.

"Oh, I wonder what those would be?", I pretend to think a couple of seconds, before saying, "Kissing my girlfriend for a start, brushing her hair, giving her a massage, make her some tea, kissing her again--", Mina hardly stifles a laugh and says, "Alright, fine, I got it. Get your ass over here, I've waited long enough," I nibble on my bottom lip as I recognize the familiar twinkle in her eyes. "Oh, my, my, looks like I've arrived," I chant and before we know it I find myself stopping the car right in front of our house. She smiles and a light blush comes coloring her cheeks, "At last," she mutters, looking at me with nothing but pure love in the eyes.

#american horror story #sarah paulson x reader #sarah paulson #writing prompts #sarah paulson images #wilhemina venable #cute and fluffy #wlw

[bg-brainrot]

what are your thoughts on Larian walking away from BG3/BG4/DLCs?

What a great question!!

So, first to acknowledge my own feelings as a gamer, as a fan of BG3, of the franchise, and, of course, of Astarion : I'm naturally a bit bummed. I would love to play more, read more, watch something, anything really.

Added to that, I also don't trust an outside team to come in to pick up the vision of the original team. I've seen it happen with other games, where the base game was one studio and the DLC was outsourced or they onboarded a new studio to take on it on as the main development team moved on to the next big project. It rarely, if ever, has worked out well.

My hope on the Hasbro/WotC side is that they leave BG3 alone to live on as a behemoth in the history of gaming... however, knowing how game publishers are, how much money BG3 made, the player interest in more content, etc -- there is no way that Hasbro is leaving money like that to the wayside.

Best case scenario I see on this side: they make auxiliary content, like books, toys, comics.

Worst case scenario: they outsource a new game team for DLC.

As for BG4, I honestly didn't expect that to be Larian's next project anyway (I was expecting Divinity 3, so feeling a different disappointment there haha). That being said, I don't think WotC or Hasbro know (and I mean this at the executive level of course) why BG3 did well. There are honestly a ton of factors on why BG3 did well, but that's for another post lol, but I don't think they could replicate that for BG4 with another studio. Doesn't mean I don't think it will be good-- it might be! It will just be very different.

Best case scenario here: they have a good studio make BG4 and it's still good, but it's different.

Worse case scenario here: they try to have a studio replicate what Larian did instead of tapping into their talents, and end up with a buggy, unfun mess. Also they bring back characters just to try to get people to buy it. 🥲

Now, as a game dev, what do I think of Larian's choice in all of this?

I LOVE IT. Wow, Swen Vincke is doing what every single developer wishes they could do if they actually had the power, money, and the influence to do it.

I have wished in the past for my studios to abandon projects, but sometimes it really was necessary to try to keep the studio afloat. As much as you want to work on a passion project, very rarely is it actually something that will keep the lights on. Oftentimes you will have to make that deal with Hasbro for a license or that deal with Epic for exclusivity just to recoup costs. Making games is expensive and, if you want to make anything at the scale that BG3 is, you usually need a lot of partnerships (a lot of their GDC talks were part of partnerships, like Dolby, Amazon, Adobe).

So the fact that they had such a success with BG3 to actually, comfortably follow their creative passions? Wow, wow, wow-- I am rooting for them so hard. I want them to make exactly the game they want and take all the time they need to do it.

Now, even knowing that Hasbro had something to do with this, was what he said about the developers not feeling passionate about the DLC true? Yeah, probably.

I've never seen something kill creative passion more (even if it's for a franchise you like or a game you've loved working on) than a directive from the top for something that's clearly just meant to make people above you more money. And with each partnership comes approvals, comes red tape, comes stakeholders that want to dictate what's in the game (oftentimes to the detriment of the game)-- and the game team can't even object because it's not their license or their brand.

The fact that Larian can say, 'screw that, I don't need more money from you' is truly such an anomaly in gaming. I am so very in awe of them as a developer-- it feels like someone breaking free of the system and paving the way forward for the rest of us. So whatever they do next, I will be there to support them.

BG3 is their most successful game so far, and I'm hopeful they will continue to push those boundaries. They've proven with each release that the core of their studio remains the same: immersive/massive RPG experiences, community-feedback focused improvements, and a well-balanced studio.

The tldr for all of this: I've loved Larian's choices so far and, while I'm bummed as a player, as a game dev I can't wait to see where this one takes them!

#cosmicchocomuffin #ask #bg3 #larian #ty again for such a good question!!! #i love larian and their choices as a studio #i know people can and should be critical of some things they do #but i cannot stress enough how phenomenal it is to see a studio like them succeed

[bintturaab]

"Do you have people you miss? How do you deal with it?"

It's not really a conscious thing. I usually try to keep myself busy enough to not think of them. But it doesn't always work. Their memories keep slipping through the cracks. I'd be laughing and talking to someone and then they'd very casually say something that a certain someone used to say, and suddenly the warm smile turns cold and I can't properly breathe anymore.

It's mainly just me trying to gulp down my tears and wishing more than anything that I could throw my heart out the window because I'm tired of this constant ache.

On a lot of days, it's just a lot of deep breaths, trying not to get triggered.

In worst of all worst case scenarios it's me succumbing to unhealthy coping mechanisms where I don't give myself time to think or process anything at all and end up burning out - body, mind and soul.

Often, I'm just falling ill frequently because my body tends to give up when my mind does too; my body succumbing to the aches of my heart. I am the proof that heartbreaks have tangible consequences on your health.

I try to miss them in a happy, positive way sometimes. Think of all the best times I've had with them and keep smiling at the fond memories until tears start cascading down my face before I even realise it.

But most of the time it's just me ardently making dua for them, and for myself, because Allah is the Only One Who can soothe my heart. And it's the only thing that truly works.

#matters of the heart

[monkiementor]

Hi hope you don't mind but can you do Nezha X gn! Reader who has trouble sleep at night due to anxiety and overthinking..?

If you can't that's ok! I don't wanna push you.

OFC I WILL !! I'll get to everyone's reqs when I come back to school tmr !!! for now, have this :))

I'm here.

Nezha x gn reader [fluff]

You stared up at your ceiling, deep in thought. You couldn't sleep, not that you expected to; the only reason you were still awake was because of all your thoughts. They came back to haunt you, and you found yourself unable to fall asleep until they were completely cleared from your mind. The way they played on repeat in your head, like a broken record, made it impossible for you to even attempt rest. You sighed as you threw off your sheets, turning around to face your window. The sky was pitch black, with only a few stars visible in the dark expanse. A few crickets chirped outside, providing some light, but it wasn't enough to illuminate much of your room. It would take more than anything else to help you fall asleep. You glanced at your clock, which sat on your nightstand, telling you that you had been tossing and turning for at least thirty minutes. Still no sign of sleep. You groaned as you laid back in bed, lately you've been overthinking about everything, even small things.

Like if Nezha really did love you. He does, right? Or was that just your imagination? No one's ever told you outright, but Nezha always says he loves you, and it never fails to make you blush when he does. But then again, that doesn't mean he truly meant it that way. What if he was just saying what he wanted to say? Your anxiety started to kick in again, thinking about the worst possible scenarios. You began to tear up a bit, knowing deep down that it wouldn't do any good. It wasn't going to change anything. "What am I doing?" you asked yourself, wiping away tears before they could fall. Tears weren't going to stop this, or make things go back to normal. They never did. You then hear the bedroom door open, followed by footsteps making their way towards your bed. You immediately knew who it was by the way the door creaked, the sound was almost silent, but you'd heard it more times than you could count.

"Are you okay, my dear?" Nezha asked softly, his voice sounded exhausted, yet concern laced throughout it. "I can hear your heart beating faster than usual." Your eyes widened, but you didn't respond. How could he tell what was going on with you without you saying a word? It was infuriating, frustrating, and embarrassing. He should just leave you alone. "Please talk to me," Nezha said as he sat on the edge of your bed. "What is troubling you?" He reaches out, placing his hand on your shoulder, and rubbing circles into your skin. Despite the action being gentle, it caused your heart rate to quicken, though you weren't sure why. He seemed so worried about you... "Nezha..." you finally spoke up after a while of silence. "Why do you love me?" The question left your mouth so quickly that you barely registered what you'd said. You looked to Nezha with wide eyes, expecting him to either laugh or say something along those lines. His reaction was much different though. In fact, it was completely opposite of what you were expecting. Nezha let out a long sigh before taking your hands in his own, squeezing tightly. "Because you are a wonderful person, who deserves the world. Because despite your shortcomings, your compassion and generosity are undeniable. Most importantly, you have made my life a lot brighter." He gazed deeply into your eyes, his own filled with a mixture of emotions. You were stunned at first, unsure how to react.

This whole situation was surreal; Nezha loved you, but you didn't know that he cared this much. "And why me?" You asked, suddenly feeling embarrassed by your words. You couldn' t believe you just blurted that out, but you felt better once you were done talking. At least now Nezha knew what was bothering you. Nezha placed an arm around you, pulling you closer to him. "It would be easy to explain, but I think that you already know that part of the answer, don' t you?" His tone of voice was soft, and there was a slight smile on his lips. You nodded your head, feeling better noww that Nezha knew exactly how you felt. Nezha sighed again. "Perhaps I am too blunt and forward sometimes," he mumbled under his breath. Then, he looked directly at you, his gaze piercing through your soul, searching yours for any signs of deception. When he saw none, his expression relaxed into one of pure adoration. "When I met you, I never believed in true love," he confessed. You remained quiet as you listened to him. "But then you opened your heart to me, and showed me that there was a place for me among your kind. That I'm not alone, but instead have someone special by my side. And in return, I fell in love with you, and I don't ever want to go back to being lonely again." Your face grew warm, and your eyes watered slightly. But you didn't cry.

Instead, you moved closer to Nezha, wrapping your arms around his waist. He wrapped his arms around your shoulders and pressed a kiss on the top of your head. "Thank you," you whispered, trying to hold back a couple tears. It was hard to speak when you felt like your chest might burst open. "You don't know how much this means to me." Nezha kissed the top of your head once more. "Don' worry about it. I'll always care for you," he said quietly. "I promise." You felt tears slip down your cheeks, but thankfully, neither of you said anything. For now, you needed this moment to be private; the last thing you needed was to embarrass yourself any further. So, for now, you allowed the two of you to simply enjoy each other's company in peace.

#lego monkie kid #monkie kid #gender neutral reader #lego monkie kid x reader #lmk x reader #monkie kid x reader #x gender neutral reader #lmk nezha #lmk nezha x reader #prince nezha #nezha #gender netural reader #lmk

[witheredoffherwitch]

The Strongs are not the good guys in Alys' story! They made her their servant and wet nurse for their babies when she herself was unmarried. What does that mean anon? It means in the best interpretation they were cruel and in the worst they must have abused her themselves!

Read critically what u consume.

The only sin Aemond did against the Strongs as far as we know and can be sure was murdering the young boys. That was wrong.

But in Alys scenario, aemond has done less/no canonical abuse than her own family.

Hi nonnie, thanks for the ask.

Careful now, you are making too much sense! Your theory would be the most obvious take-away for anyone familiar with the world of asoiaf. Bastards are not treated well unless you were fortunate enough to be sired by Stark male member (because Starks usually do not subject kids through brutal ostracization because of some mediaeval honor-code: Jon and Theon are good examples of that!) -- BUT other than that, you were pretty much fucked! Rhaenyra's bastards fared well because 1) the mother held a more privileged position (due to which her kids were ensured certain protection), and 2) admitting their bastardry would have tried Rhaenyra, Harwin and Laenor for treason.

Secondly, I think it is fair to conclude that House Strong wasn't some tight-knit 'loving' family. Sure, we've seen brothers gossiping during Rhaenyra and Laenor's wedding but apart from that, the house functions like any other Westerosi house. Lyonel Strong doesn't confront the truth about his grandsons until Harwin makes a fool out of himself in the courtyard.. and by then, the severity of the said matter was long-overdue and extremely consequential to the point of non-avoidance. The younger brother didn't even flinch before killing off his dear father and brother for some political gain. If Larys 'the Clubfoot' Strong did not feel any kinship with his family, then one can assume that reception of a known bastard is going to be less than ideal.

Thirdly, we still don't know how are they going to portray Aemond during his Riverrun arc. I keep saying it because Aemond (along with Alicent and Rhaenyra) is altered from his canon version. In the show, Aemond never insults Rhaenyra and only ever maintains a cold indifference towards her. He isn't shown to be some raging misogynist. He only insults the Strong bastards after Luke displays an absurd lack of self-awareness during that dinner scene. And in the Storm's End segment, he doesn't chase after Luke due to some back-handed comment from Maris... but rather, that conflict is shown as an extension to the last dinner scene. BUT the most telling of all is how Luke was killed off in a supposed accident - meaning that Aemond never intended to kill him in the first place. Interestingly enough, there was a deleted scene where we see Aemond giving the camera an evil look, but that part got cut in post-production for some reason. Instead, they chose to end the scene with his distressed expression.

Now, do I believe Aemond will experience some radical arc change? NO! But the way the future events unfold will be certainly DIFFERENT! That's why I am both skeptical and mildly optimistic about how the show might portray their relationship. Aemond and Alys are both heavily misunderstood characters - and this alone opens a massive potential for this couple than some other speculated ships. That being said, this ongoing hate for Alysmond is very forced - and it says a lot when the majority fandom has just discarded her as someone put their beloved prince 'under a spell' or is a homewrecker for pulling Aemond from their own crackship.

#anon asks #alysmond #aemond x alys #aemond targaryen #fandom bs

[yanderederee]

Anon Askbox Responses:

anon1:

losing motivation is the worst, but I just wanna say that it will come back eventually just try and not force it otherwise you'll feel like shit and that will make it worse. BUT IT WILL COME BACK and I'm excited to see your new works too since I love all your other ones :) but take your time and don't stress about others, focus on yourself and it's understandable to suddenly feel the need to get others to be proud of your work too but even if there's a small amount of people trust me those are the main people that LOVE your work. luv you <3

anon2:

Hi! I saw your poll and, I think you should write what you want to write. There are readers for a lot of different genres and scenarios. Personally, I like reading works that authors enjoyed writing, even if it's not what I usually read or even apart of the fandom, because I know that a human thought this up and put genuine effort into it. That alone makes any work worth reading. I myself am also in the situation of making my characters/scenarios too "edgy," but I think people should write something that they'll look back at and be glad they got out their brain. And tbh, I'll eat up whatever you cook because I enjoy your writing and I am starving for TKR content.

anon3:

i"d like to read everything ypu write, no matter confession or WIPs everything will be interesting, so you can post WIPs if you want (sorry tuat i wrote it here, i have some problems eith tumbler and i can etote under posts)

⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯✦

First and foremost, THANK YOU! I appreciate everyone’s encouragement and support … I worry about spamming, and this decided to dedicate a response in this manner!:) even if these may be the same anon, I’m all the more grateful for your dedication thus far…

Honestly, as silly as it may sound… this little bit of interaction and support had really picked up my confidence some, and helped me in writing an entire Confession prompt…!

I will be posting it soon..! However, true to my previous Poll Post, I would like to revisit the older installments of my Baji x Tutor!Reader series, so that they may be more uniform!

Please look forward to it! I may reblog them, if the changes made and significant enough!

Again, thank you all very much once again! I hope to keep this motivation going for even one more work to see the light of day!:)

special thank you to the following blogs for their consistent support!:

@finleyfox , @imunknown894 , @keisukibaji , @goddessofwaifus , @w0lfeyc4t (I try remembering blogs I see regularly check on my page, but I am not always very observant…)

#thank you from the bottom of my heart #I will continue to try writing as the mood so strikes #ask blog #koiSpam

[lythea-creation]

Expectations - Shams x fem reader (Chapter 4)

Chapter 1

Previous Chapter

warnings: nothing new rlly

word count: 1.014

------------------

I woke up in Shams' bed, my girlfriend soundly asleep beside me. It was not anything unusual. Omar had carried me to her bed lots of times before when I had fallen asleep on the couch.

It took me a moment to remember yesterdays events and when I did my stomach was doing back-flips.

What was I supposed to do now? Would my dad come and search for me? How will he react? Will he force me to return home and isolate me even more? Make me switch schools to separate me from Shams and Omar?

Thousands of worst-case-scenarios were flooding my mind, but I gulped them down. It was not helpful anyway. I had to focus on how to solve this situation.

So I decided to get out of bed and take a shower, hoping to feel better after cleansing myself of the dirt yesterday.

Today was Wednesday, meaning we had to go to school. I had no idea what time it was, only that Shams' alarm clock had not rung yet.

I did not find my backpack when I returned to Shams' room. Therefore I blindly borrowed some of her clothes to leave as quickly as possible, hoping not to wake her up.

The clock in the living room was telling me that it was 4.26 am. A lot of time before school. Time to think and reconsider.

Right now I was missing my mom more than I had for a long time. How could you long for somebody you never got to know?

“Hey”, Shams uttered quietly.

I flinched slightly out of surprise. I had not heard her coming.

She sat down next to me, scanning me up and down as if she could read my mind simply by looking at me. Maybe she could somehow. After all she had known me for pretty much my whole life.

“He hurt you worse this time, didn't he?”, she inquired, a knowing glint in her eyes.

“He brought up mom”, I confessed.

He usually never did and Shams knew that. I barely knew anything about mom as he was shutting her away, keeping his memories of her out of my reach; my only chance to get to know her.

“What did he say?”, she wondered, observing me cautiously.

“Pretty much that he's glad she isn't alive to see how pathetic I am”, I mumbled.

Shams' hands immediately moved to hold mine. “You don't believe him, do you?”

I sighed. “I dunno”, I answered hesitantly. “I mean … I have no idea what kind of person she was.”

“I'm sure she would have loved you. How couldn't she? She was even willing to risk her life for you. Some grades wouldn't have bothered her, although your grades are incredible anyway”, she pointed out.

I sent her a small smile. She was probably right. I should not let my dad get into my head. Yet I could not quite help it.

“I don't wanna go to school”, I admitted. “I don't wanna pretend everything is fine anymore. I don't wanna stay away from you for my reputation.”

“Then don't”, she encouraged me. “You literally ran away from home. Do you think your reputation is such a big deal right now?”

“It feels like I'm daring him to ruin my life”, I remarked, resting my head on her shoulder.

I was feeling tired, rather exhausted. And it was the kind that no amount of sleep would be able to fix.

“Maybe you're worrying too much. Overthinking won't solve anything”, she considered.

I could not disagree with her. So I stayed silent instead.

“How about doing something fun before school starts? We got a bit of time to spare”, she stated and got us controllers to play video games.

How could I say no to that, especially with the challenging expression my girlfriend was wearing.

We only made it to school in time because Omar showed up in the living room. The game had done a better job at distracting me than I had expected and Shams was contributing greatly to it. She was even able to improve my mood during the bike ride to school.

But as soon as she stopped at our usual spot to drop me off, the bubble popped.

“Go on! I don't wanna get off yet. I need you by my side today and I don't care what the others will do about it”, I declared.

Her grin strengthened me in my decision.

“Alright then”, she agreed enthusiastically and continued the way.

Saying that we got a lot of weird looks would be a huge understatement. Basically all eyes were on us, most of them appearing shocked.

“Did you see their faces?”, I asked Shams while she was putting her bicycle away.

I could barely contain my laughter and honestly I did not want to.

“Priceless”, she chimed in.

We walked to our classroom together, talking and laughing the whole way. And obviously enjoying the reactions to it.

“Since when are you talking to Shams?”, Tasneem wondered while I was settling on my seat. Hiba was closely behind her; of course.

“Hm, let me think”, I messed with her. “I'd say since I learned talking.”

Her dumbstruck face was absolutely worth any consequences.

“I don't get it”, she confessed.

“Shams is Omar's sister”, I revealed, watching as their faces lit up with realization.

“I had no idea”, Tasneem exclaimed.

“We're really close. So you're offending me every time you offend her”, I added.

Tasneem simply nodded and retreated back to her seat.

Shams and I quickly laughed at each other before focusing back on the lesson ahead.

Despite Shams' great job at cheering me up, I was anxious the whole time, waiting for my dad to show up.

But among all the scenarios I had pictured in my head I had never expected him to not show up at all. And somehow this was destroying me in a tauntingly painful way.

----------------------

You asked for it, you shall get it! I hope you like the chapter. Do you have any suggestions for the next chapters. I have honestly no clue what I'm doing with this story.

Tag List: @sunwoniie

#al rawabi school for girls #shams x reader #fem reader #lgbtqia #romance #angst #fluff #drama

[gracelesslady23]

20 Qᴜᴇꜱᴛɪᴏɴꜱ ꜰᴏʀ ꜰɪᴄ ᴡʀɪᴛᴇʀꜱ

Thanks for the tag @mycupofrum !!!

Ao3 Username: graceless_lady

1. How many works do you have on A03?

21 fics.

2. What’s your total Ao3 word count?

353k

3. What fandoms do you write for?

Harry Potter

4. What are your top five fics by kudos?

the ghost of you, it keeps me awake (Sirius/James, M, 73k, WIP)

and a love that I dreamt of came to me at my worst (Sirius/James, E, 90k, complete)

In Plain Sight (Sirius/James, E, 30k, complete)

The Wedding Date (Sirius/James, M, 25k, complete)

you'll see me in hindsight (Sirius/James, E, 35k, complete)

5. Do you respond to comments?

Yes! Sometimes it takes me a while to carve out time to give a proper response (esp if pesky RL gets in the way) but I always plan to respond even if it takes me a while. It always, always makes my day to see a comment pop into my inbox and I reread comments a lot to keep up motivation when writing so its the least I can do <3

6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

Probably tell me you love me, come back and haunt me (S/J, 23K, complete) although its more of a bittersweet ending rather than an all out angsty one. I love laying on the angst when working through a fic but always aim to give something hopeful at the end (Sirius and James had enough tragedy in canon imo haha)

7. What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

I'm a HEA girlie, so like most of them.

Maybe you'll see me in hindsight because the happy ending was hard won and I lingered in the happy ending for longer than usual.

8. Do you get hate on fics?

Rarely, luckily.

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

Sometimes. Usually its pretty vanilla in terms of kink.

10. Do you write crossovers? What’s the craziest one you’ve written?

No. Well, I did when I was a teen, but those were pretty terrible so luckily there is nothing of that published :P

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

I dont think so (luckily)

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

Yes, I have been lucky enough to have four translated (or partially translated) from English to 中文-普通话 國語 (links below)!! I am always so flattered when someone offers to translate my fics.

【授翻】In Plain Sight 昭彰 by hsothe

【授翻】在人生低谷中坠入爱河 by MoAhx

【鹿犬】令我无眠的你的幽灵 by amnesiaby

【授权翻译】tell me you love me, come back and haunt me by foxleaaap

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

No. I'm quite insecure/secretive about my writing before I am ready to publish so I don't know how well my process would work with that... but it would be cool.

14. What’s your all time favorite ship?

Sirius/James always... my longest running ship by far. I always circle back to them.

15. What’s a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

I want you to ruin my life. I ended up anon-ing it because I felt so guilty every time I saw it on my works page. But I just lost the thread of that plot completely and had a few changes in opinions about how I think Sirius in Slytherin would be, which clashed with the story already written. But I'll never so say never, I've started to have some thoughts about it again, so maybe I'll get back into it...

16. What are your writing strengths?

Hmmmm um, the beginning of fic? Idk I feel like writing the set up for fics is at least the easiest part for me. I love thinking up what if scenarios and running from there.

Dialogue and angst & hurt/comfort also comes must easier to me than like action scenes and fluff.

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

Where to start lol, the most frustrating ones for me I think are plotting and writing a satisfying ending/climax.

I also struggle a bit writing clever characters as smart as they should be (hamstrung by my own intelligence lol).

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic?

Not sure if my opinion really counts here as someone whose only fluent in english, but I like to see it if its done respectfully and makes sense in the story.

19. First fandom you wrote for?

Harry Potter.

20. Favourite fic you’ve written?

and a love that I dreamt of came to me at my worst

This was my pet project over a really special time in my life and I think I will always have a massive soft spot for it (and find myself drawn to rereading parts of it often). I also managed to throw in a lot of tropes I personally really enjoy into this one (mid aged Sirius & James, midlife crisis James, competent Sirius (and James), mutual pining, co-dependency, jealous James, Harry having loving parents/adults in his life, etc).

This was so fun! Tagging: @jamesunderwater @bullets-from-another-dimension @lovelymasks @forestdeath1

#ask game

[brandstifter-sys]

Distracting

For @dukexietyweek Day 2: Games           (Ao3)(login required)

Word Count: 1579

Characters: Virgil, Remus, Roman (mentioned)

Rating: T

Warnings: Intrusive thoughts, anxiety, crying, mentions of suicide, referenced suicide attempt, sexual themes, gore mention

Virgil and Remus tend to get serious when they play video games. And when Remus gets anxious because of his thoughts, Virgil knows just how to comfort him.

---

Sometimes having a boyfriend like Remus meant getting dragged into the Imagination for some crazy adventure. Sometimes it meant cuddling him so he wouldn't flail in his sleep when he had nightmares. Sometimes it meant some violent suggestive roleplay. But sometimes it meant playing video games and having a heart to heart. 

Virgil was used to Remus rambling on about his frustrations while plowing through zombies. He was used to venting about his own struggles when it was his turn on the controller. They were better at talking shit when they were both playing. But this time was different. 

"You know what really grinds my gears?" Remus said as he moved Leon through the police station. He was sitting on the couch, leaning on his knees and watching the screen. 

"A lot of things. What is it this time?" Virgil asked from his perch on the couch. 

"Roman. He won't shut up about Nico, and he keeps flooding the Imagination with fluffy romantic scenarios about Thomas getting married and growing old with him," Remus huffed as his fingers worked over the controller.

"What's wrong with that?" Virgil bristled. So maybe he was making that worse. 

"Nothing, but he's setting himself up for heartache. He's trying to make his fantasies reality when Thomas doesn't really know Nico. He's not excited for the journey, just the goals. It'll bite him in the ass if he can't separate reality from fantasy." 

"You're one to talk," Virgil scoffed. 

"I am! When's the last time Thomas actually murdered someone? Or fought a pack of coyotes? Or decided that the blender was a good place to stick his—" 

"Point made." 

"I don't really want to take over the bulk of the creative work while he wallows again. I let my influence slip in too much. I thought you would have caught me back then." 

"You did a good enough job that I thought those slips were just Roman being a mess," Virgil shrugged. 

"Daw," Remus giggled and glanced at him quickly when he was in a safe room, "That's the nicest thing you've said to me all week!" 

"It's Sunday, you dork," Virgil huffed and crossed his arms. He hated how easily Remus could fluster him even though they'd been together since before the series started.

"Yeah and? You'll probably say something even nicer to me before Saturday!" 

"If I didn't have a shit ton of work to do, I'd be insulted." 

"I like it when you're snarky and mean! You come up with the wittiest comebacks and threats, and it makes me feel special that you use that brain power and creativity on me!" Remus said with a shimmy. 

Virgil grumbled and hid his face in his hands. He pulled his knees to his chest and tried to disappear. He really had to get better at taking compliments. At least Remus went back to playing his game. 

"You know, the worst part of this whole Nico thing is that you're involved on Roman's side."

"Are you jealous that I'm spending time with Roman?" 

"Nope! I like that you're friends! I don't know if I like how he's influencing how you think about Nico," Remus replied through gritted teeth. 

"What are you trying to say?" 

"I'm worried about you. You're usually cautious about other people, you need to know more before you get attached. If he's not the guy you guys imagine, I know Pissboy will lose it, but what about you?" Remus asked and wiped his eyes, "What happens to you when he goes back to being a tyrant?"

"Octopup?" Virgil asked and relaxed his posture. 

"What if he starts blaming you and attacking you again when things go wrong?" Remus rambled. He had to pause the game because his hands were shaking, "Wouldn't it hurt more since you were actively trying to help? What if he pushes you to the edge again? I know how mean and hurtful he can get."

Virgil took the controller and set it down before pulling Remus onto his lap. Remus clung to him and trembled. 

"What if I'm not enough to stop you? What if you decide to try again?" 

"Your intrusive thoughts are getting to you," Virgil said softly and rubbed his back. It wasn't an accusation, but an understanding. 

"I can see it so clearly. The falling, the abyss, and then you disappearing. And it could happen! It's not just a bad idea this time!" Remus sobbed, "I keep seeing you die over and over, just like the last time. And I was right back then! If I didn't show up—" he hiccuped and shook with a another wave of tears. 

"Puppy," Virgil said and kissed his forehead, "I'm not going to let that happen. Even if he blames me for everything, I know he doesn't mean it, I know that the others see my worth, and I know that I can't bear the thought of actually hurting you. I can't forget the way you looked at me, the way you pulled me back without touching me. I can't do that again." 

"Virgil," Remus said and looked up at him, "I love you." 

"I love you too," Virgil said and hugged him, "And I won't let any other anxiety eat you alive. You're my snack." 

Remus giggled wetly and nuzzled into his shoulder. It wasn't often he got anxious over his intrusive thoughts, so he was glad to have the most experienced anxious mess with him. 

"Can we play a game?" Remus asked, unsure if Virgil would go with it. With all that needed to be said out of the way, Remus needed a good distraction.

"I guess Resident Evil isn't the best option. So how about this? You name a musician or band and I'll tell you what song of theirs reminds me of you," Virgil suggested. He could think of something else if he had to. 

"If I don't know the song will you sing the lyrics?" 

"It won't be the whole song." 

"Okay. I'll just name bands I don't know well so you'll sing for me," Remus said and lifted his head, "Uh, Escape the Fate." 

"Gorgeous Nightmare." 

"I don't know that one," Remus pouted and dried his eyes. Virgil smirked and kissed his forehead before clearing his throat.

"'You're such a gorgeous nightmare. Old habits never seem to go away. You make me feel brand new, yeah. We resurrect it's like I've come back to life.'"

Remus giggled softly and squeezed his boyfriend. He was an emo nightmare alright. 

"Black Veil Brides." 

"Rebel Love Song," Virgil answered with no hesitation. Remus knew that one and he grinned at the thought. 

"A Day to Remember?" 

"You Had Me at Hello," Virgil responded and gently scratched his scalp. 

"Lyrics?" Remus hummed and melted into the touch like a puppy.

"'What have I gotten into this time around? I know that I had sworn I'd never trust anyone again but I didn't have to. You had me at hello.'"

"Yellow car," Remus suggested, unsure if that was an actual band. Virgil caught him biting his lip and decided he wouldn't make him nervous again.

"Ocean Avenue," Virgil said before singing a few lyrics, "'If I could find you now things would get better. We could leave this town and run forever. I know someway, somehow we'll be together. Let your waves crash down on me and take me away, yeah." 

"Uh, Red Jumpsuit Apparatus?" Remus asked and snuggled closer. 

"Your Guardian Angel. You don't need me to sing that one," Virgil hummed, "I sing it to you at night." 

"Pretty please?" 

"For you, yeah," Virgil said softly and kissed away his tears. 

"'Seasons are changing and waves are crashing and stars are falling all for us. Days grow longer and nights grow shorter. I can show you I'll be the one.'"

Remus laughed softly and kissed his neck. 

"You're so sweet, Scare Bear!" Remus sighed and trailed his lips up Virgil's jaw, "You take such good care of me." 

"That's because you take good care of me. And because no matter how gruesome and gross you are, I love you." 

"Can we play one more round and then cuddle and watch a movie? Naked?" Remus asked and nipped at his ear lobe. 

"You went from anxious to horny fast," Virgil noted and pulled his face away from his gremlin. 

"It's not my usual horny. It's cuddly vanilla horny, and it's all because you gave me a heart boner and it spread. So can we?"

"Yeah, one more and then we can go to your room."

"Papa Roach! And you should still sing!" Remus giggled. He knew them better than Virgil.

"...To be Loved," Virgil said and leaned down right by his ear to deliver on the lyrics with the same cadence as the original recording, "'I want domination, I want your submission, I see you're not resistin', to this temptation.'" 

Remus shivered at the low growl laced in Virgil's voice. He expected that but he was never ready for it. He grabbed Virgil's face and planted a smooch on his boyfriend. 

"You really know how to distract me and make me squishy!" Remus purred, "Keep doing it!" 

Virgil kissed him again and sank them both out. Sometimes having Remus for a boyfriend meant being vulnerable in a casual setting. Sometimes it meant that Remus would need him more than he let on. And most times it meant Virgil had his own piece of heaven. 

#dukexiety #remus sanders #virgil sanders #sanders sides #dukexietyweek2023 #day 2 #suicide mention tw #anxiety tw #intrusive thoughts tw #gore mention tw #hurt/comfort

[thessalian]

Thess vs Boundaries and Guilt

How is it that establishing boundaries can feel so good and so bad at the same time?

So it was an even worse mess today than usual. Tuesday's long complicated stuff that I couldn't finish last night was still there when I logged in. Temp's still avoiding it in a serious way, and New Girl ... well, she wouldn't have done it anyway but apparently she's off sick. Which, I mean, it happens, but the fact that there's hardly a difference in the workload when she's gone should tell someone something.

Anyway, I found out that New Girl was out sick in an email from Scruffman, telling me that there were lots of sicknesses (Goblin and now New Girl, and no telling who else), and he's on a half-day tomorrow, so I might have to come into the office, and I should ring later in the afternoon to discuss.

...I can barely walk right now. I have to use my cane or the wall in the house. I can keep doing overtime, even with the long complicated messes, but I cannot get on a bus for an hour and a half each way. I have pushed too hard already. This could cause me serious problems.

So I rang at the appointed time and said ... well, I said no. I said that I'd pushed too hard already, that I was in significant pain because of extended overtime hours I've been pulling, and there's no chance I could recover in time to get on a bus tomorrow, even if I skipped doing overtime tonight (which we cannot afford to have me do). He was apologetic and understanding but did try the "Well, with this many unexpected absences..." I ... feel shitty for doing it, but I flagged up that I am the one who is disabled and I am the only one who hasn't called in sick. Not spoken: "even when I clearly should be because I am functionally immobile and it's the fault of all this overtime that I have no choice but to do".

Eventually, he understood and said, "You know what, no, never mind; it doesn't sound like it'd be safe and I'm not willing to risk that. Keep on with what you're doing - it's been a great help - but I'll figure out something else and it's probably just me dealing with worst case scenarios anyway".

But I still feel shitty. It's the first time they've asked me to do something like this and I've had to say no. Sure, I had to say no because of all the other stuff they've asked me to do and what it's been doing to me, but I still feel bad. I will try not to, though. I have enough physical pain; I won't be crippled by guilt too.

Right. Back to it. At least I can do the overtime typing. I don't like it - especially when the guy with the long dictations outdid himself with one that goes for over twenty fucking minutes, and I'm still stuck with the long shit - but it feels like the least I can do.

#Thess has a day job

[justanothersyscourse]

Just hopping in to say I've followed you for a while and your blog's been both entertaining and educational. I was misdiagnosed with OSDD (my psychologist thinks I actually have BPD and nondescript memory issues, it's something we're looking into) and your blog was actually one of the things that made me initially ask to have my diagnosis reevaluated because my experience seemed so divorced from what it "should" be upon further inspection, even taking into account variations between systems. Thanks for sticking around ^^

OMG

I don't usually post these types of asks, but I think this one is important for people to see

Anon, I am genuinely happy and excited for you, and I'm sure that'll surprise a lot of people-- like, what's worth celebrating about that?

Revisiting and re-evaluating a diagnosis can be really stressful and even kind of scary, but it's not necessarily a negative thing. A lot of systems are really afraid of the possibility that they're not systems, and that's understandable. Completely, no question, I get that. But when someone is misdiagnosed with another disorder, it's not seen as a negative experience in the same way.

As an example, my psychiatrist had (and continues to have, for some reason) a hard time deciding whether it was OCD or Tourettes that was causing some major issues for me. I was originally diagnosed with Tourette's, and it was changed to OCD only a few years ago.

While it was stressful while it was happening, it wasn't... Negative. It was a step toward understanding myself better and it gave me a clear path for what I needed to do next to start making more progress in my healing journey. It sucked, but overall it was positive. Nothing about the diagnosis change scared me.

When it comes to DID/OSDD, learning that you're not a system is seen as... Probably the worst thing that could happen. The idea is actually terrifying for most systems.

But it doesn't need to be? We're all just trying to get better, and sometimes that means looking at other options. It doesn't make YOU a bad person or a faker, anyone who abandons you was never worth your time to start with, and you haven't lost your community.

Anon, I'm thrilled that your journey is moving along, you're taking steps in the right direction. No matter where you find yourself, or what you end up having in the end, you'll always be welcome here. You are important in system spaces because of the experiences you have and your perspective on symptoms.

I'm so proud of you, and I hope you'll stick around and keep us updated on things you're learning!

And to you, and everyone else, don't stop looking for answers until you're comfortable with what you're being told.

If you disagree with your doctor, find another and another and another, until SOMEONE explains it to you in a way that makes sense, or until you manage to find the right words. Like with any hard, confusing conversation, sometimes it just takes the right combination of words, from either side, for the whole scenario to suddenly click and make sense.

(that might be a bit Canadian of me, I know the US healthcare system is not quite so... Simple and... Inexpensive, but I stand by the idea that you call the shots in your healing journey)

[respitelocklyre]

Grwm post-swamp edition lmao 🤪 ⬇️

(The following update is posted in the form of a video)

[ID: A vertically-oriented video depicting a white tiefling with long-spiraling horns and silver hair. His bangs are pushed back by a headband, showing a face full of dark freckles and black marks that radiate from their eyes and fade to a gradient. They're wearing a black, silk bathrobe that's slipped off one shoulder. In front of them but mostly out of frame is a large selection of makeup and a personal mirror. Behind them is what looks to be a bedroom. Throughout the video, they are doing a makeup tutorial and showing off different products while they talk. The caption reads: "Grwm post-swamp edition lmao @FauntasticPartyTime #fyp #grwm #Strixhaven #Warlock #makeuptutorial #lgbtq #pepsihalftimeshow"]

Transcript:

Get ready with me for a celebratory dinner after I almost died in a swamp!

For those of you who don't know, I'm a freshman at a magic university. I try not to talk much about school because I know that's not why most of you follow me, but I thought I'd do a story time while I do my makeup since I've been on a bit of a hiatus from socials the past month. We just finished our first field exam in a lit-er-al swamp, so I am freshly showered and getting ready to go out with my party for a well-earned dinner.

[Cut to a makeup product being held aloft] First, I'm going in with some primer from Tasha's Cauldron- it's super moisturizing, I love it.

So, like, before I get into the story of how my exam went, I just want to address why I went on hiatus real quick. I had some personal issues with a friend group here at college and... I don't really know if I want to, or even can say too much, but it looked really bad for a while. All I'm gonna say is keep in mind that adventuring can be really dangerous, and this was, like, worst-case-scenario levels at first. Things have kind of settled down now and everyone is [they pause to make a face and gesture vaguely with their hands before shrugging]...fine. Yeah, everyone is fine now. But I'm sorry for just going MIA for a while and I know I have soooo many DMs and comments and stuff that I left unanswered. I'm trying to make my way through them, I prommie!

[Cut to a makeup product being held aloft] Concealer and Foundation are both from Marvelous Pigments in their shade Wight. It's seriously the only thing I've found that matches my skin. If they ever discontinue it, I'm gonna have to unalive myself for real.

Anyways, since things have settled we're all back in our classes and stuff now. I've been working over time to memorize the new cheer routines the squad ran through while I was gone. I'm working on class work too, I guess, but I think I might just find some nerd who's willing to help me with, um... private tutoring lessons, if you catch my drift [they wink].

Back to what I really wanna talk about, though, which is the practical exam we just had! There's this overgrown swamp outside of the school that I think the Witherbloom students use a lot- it's great for growing herbs and brewing potions and stuff, but it's soooo terrible for my hair and clothes. We get out there and I guess there's this spring of wild magic that's been messing up the ecosystem and bringing in all sorts of monsters from out of town. Our job was to basically help the professors cast a spell to close it off, and they graded us on how well we did.

[Cut to a makeup product being held aloft] For my eyes I usually just like to emphasize my natural features with some glitter or holo, so I'm going in with the color Abyssal from the Chromatic palette by Color Spray.

So we're in the swamp, we gather all the material components for the spell, and then we have to hunt down the spring itself. Luckily we didn't have to wade around in swamp water because a couple of my classmates can fly, including this cute owlin who plays on the team I cheer for [laughs, dismissive] I don't think he follows my socials, it's fine.

But when I tell you things got crazy so fast once we started up this ritual spell, oh my queen. Like, my party's already faced a lot of monsters but this was, like, a lot of monsters. There were these awful little bat-mosquito things that would stick their teeth in you and start sucking blood, it was super gross. And my friends told me there was also some kind of ghost or spirit or something that kept going inside them? Talk about invasive. Oh and not to mention the two giant scorpions, but we'll talk about those guys later.

[Continues talking while curling their eyelashes] The craziest of all was this big, blue...toad? It was like a bipedal toad with big fuck-off claws. My classmate Sersh kept screaming about how its claws can apparently turn you into one of them, too, if it hits you. Which, like, yuck. [Slightly sarcastic] What a loss to the entire world it would've been if I'd been turned into some ugly monster, y'know?

[Cut to a makeup product being held aloft] Eyeliner and mascara from Dark E.L.F., just tightlining my eyes today.

So, back to the giant scorpions- we for real would've been fucked if our friend Mire hadn't been able to charm them. But they're a druid, so this is kind of their whole thing and it worked great. Me, my other friend Willow, and Sersh got to focus on helping the teachers close the spring while the big toad guy and the scorpions had their beef. So fun to watch.

Willow's a bard, bee-tee-dubs, and you should definitely go check her shit out. She plays the cutest little pan pipes and is sooo funny and sweet. I'll drop her @ in the caption!

[Cut to a makeup product being held aloft] I'm finishing up with [making air quotations] "bronzer" in the shade Shadowfell and highlighter in the shade Lurue from Marvelous Pigments again.

I'm not gonna lie, it was looking pretty rough for a bit, but we managed to close off the portal without any of us dying! Or, like, passing out. Okay, well, that's not totally true. John- oh, the scorpions were named John and Charlotte by the way- did unfortunately die in battle, but Charlotte made it out. We gave John a little swamp burial to commemorate his sacrifice.

Once all the monsters were killed, Mettie and Puppet- that's his familiar; she's cheeky and we love her- even helped me clean up the caltrops I'd set as a trap (which totally failed, ugh, but whatever). I was gonna just leave 'em there but Mire seemed mad about it for some reason. Metal's technically biodegradable, isn't it? But Puppet liked picking them up 'cause they were shiny and she's a raven, so it was a win-win. I let her keep one.

[Cut to a makeup product being held aloft] And I'll be using a setting spray from Cleric's Formula to seal the look!

I'm excited we passed our first field exam, I can't believe how great school is going. I totally thought I'd be flunking but this shit is easy. Sure, I almost died...[counting on their fingers] four or five times? in the past few months and a bunch of my friends keep almost dying too, but otherwise I feel like we're killing it! I mean, I guess it's killing us, but you know.

Here's the finished look [pause] I gotta go, I'm late [video cuts off].

#Strixhaven life updates

[havfayth]

ffxvi muses will be moved to tertiary muses and will only be written with friends.

i just don't feel all that connected with the fandom tbh and so i haven't been following much of anyone from it other than friends i know well and while i think ffxvi story is great for the most part, there are some that is left wanting. for one, it's about my big dumb man aka dion. i love him, man but i think my portrayal of him is vastly different and so it's not something i want to explore with someone unless i knew them well.

first of all, i find dion spearing olivier instead of the two fully grown adults who have been outright egging him to do tyrannical shit ( unless he already knows oliver = ultima, which is fine ) to be such a .......... pathetic behaviour on his part that i can't even bring myself to joke about it 😭 you're not telling me that he can hold himself back at two adults who talked down to him, and even proposing he go assert dominance after a truce is called and that every citizen who got caught in the conflict can get replaced. but when a kid say smth that is considered a mild version of the details the adults have been spewing. like why the hells is bahamut's ball so teeny weeny in this game. like why.

and while i do think the whole lmao dion killed a kid is funny as a meme during the first week of the game's release, i think it's snowballed to a point where i felt a little uncomfy because it's bringing out a lot of extra parts that i am personally uncomfy with seeing. but also nah .. i'm not going to give dion credit for taking down a kid ( who happened to be ultima, in which the fact was pure ignorance on dion's part until the second time ) just because he didn't manage to get an actual badass moment with shooting back at his father's twisted ideals and quite frankly, emotionally manipulative behaviour that dion truly deserves that crowning moment but was robbed from him. rip,,,,, it's ok i always have aymeric de borel from ffxiv

but i think it's good that he later admitted it was his weakness and his fault that ultima was able to take advantage of him because man .. how are you not aiming your spear at the actual tyrant who actually had sway over how things are carried out. like sure, he's your dad but shouldn't you be prepared for it or at least, expected the very realistic worst case scenario before starting quite a dramatic and eye-catching seige for everyone in the city to see? before storming your way over to the audience? like what, do you think your dad is just going to flip over a new coin at some talk no jutsu and getting rid of a child they can just later conceive again? after all that talk about how people can just be replaced?

and for the most part, sylvestre was taken out in the middle of the whole thing so god riddance, but i can't feel all that bad for dion being turned into bahamut later with ... pretty much everything considered and how a tyrant was taken out in the process. rip to the people who died in the middle of the conflict though.

last but not least, i wished dion lived so that he could actually face and properly address the things that happened. accepting that it is not fully under his control but also, he should've weighed his expectations better and make actual plans before calling up a seige. it had to be done sooner than later, for sure but definitely not in that sloppy ass way. and also facing the fact that sylvestre might have emotionally manipulated him since he was a child to have unwavering faith in him. instead, he died and sylvestre's behaviour was left up to ("oh he was under the unbreakable spells of his wife" get out of here alksjalsk) so ............. shrugs?? it's smth i'd like to explore but if i can't find anyone to write that with me, i'll just go to word docs as usual.

#ooc. / atta! #some vents about the game under readmore #its not smth i like to say because i do love most parts of the game but well... unu;; #i dont think i will ever expand my ffxvi rps beyond my friends :prayerhands:

[moose-muffin]

I know only Jessie and James are in the list for TR, but what about Butch? And Cassidy, if you feel obligated. 😂 You don't have to answer if you don't want to; I know Butch and Cassidy don't appear often enough. 😅

P.S. Lee!James, and Rocketshipping in the tickles scenario in general are a precious thing. 🥰🥰🥰

I like this stuff too, but am closeted lately. 😂 Though Lee!Butch is a favorite concept of mine. 🥰

AWWW HI!! I AM SO SORRY FOR THE SUPER DUPER LONG WAIT ON THIS ONE BUT LETS GET INTO IT!!!!! IM TOTALLY WILLING TO DO BUTCH AND CASSIDY FOR YOU AND I TRULY APPRECIATE YOUR PATIENCE!! TO RESPOND TO YOUR PS, YES THEY ARE TRULY JUST TEH MOST ADORABLE AND WHOLESOME MOMENTS

Butch: HEHEHE WHAT A GUY!!! im gonna go with 30% ler and 70% lee bc as much as he seems super macho and strong he would def be ticklish, I know it!

Lee:

- it’s definitely not as often that cassidy or butch get in tickle fights as they are much more career oriented than our other sillies, but when and if they do Butch is usually the lee

-he is certainly ticklish, maybe not too much but I’d say like his ribs and his knees would be pretty bad

-super raspy voice means a raspy laugh too and it’s just so fun to listen to

Ler:

-he’s a very awkward ler because he hasn’t experienced tickling too often. But he makes it work and he does learn from Cassidy which is a nice plus!

- he tends to do it as retaliation rather than just for fun, but sometimes if he’s feeling goofy he might go for it!

Cassidy: a complete flop 70% ler and 30 % lee!

Lee:

- I’d say her lee moments come from back in her days of being friends with Jessie. Though I’m sure Cass dished out a lot of tickles too but we’ll get there next

-she’s definitely ticklish in very unconventional places so she gets away with pretending to not be ticklish. I’d say like her arms or her legs are super sensitive to gentle tickles and probably her sides too

Ler:

- here’s where she gets to shine ✨

- a tickler queen! she is so strong and knows exactly where to tickle to get people to go down, it’s impressive tbh!

- teasy, absolutely the worst! She will just talk about how incapable you are of getting her to stop and talk about how sweet it is that you can’t escape, so so belittling (but let’s be honest the lee probably loves it so very much)

- her and butch rarely go at it but when they do it’s usually Cassidy on top

THATS ALL IVE GOT, IM SORRY ITS TAKEN ME F O R E V E R TO GET THESE OUT BUT I HOLE THEYRE WORTH IT EVEN A LITTLE BIT!! THANK YOU SMUHC AND ILY, YOU ARE AMAZINF

#Cassidy and butch tickle #pokemon tickle #madis hcs up in here

[tomionefinds]

what’s your dream fic? not looking for a rec but just what boxes would tick all your tomione fantasies.

for me, i like academic rivals, jealousy, banter, tom to be slightly evil but not a full killer, hermione to be a bit meaner than canon, and a good ensemble

Hey Anon,

Well this definitely going to be a lot. Sorry, and just remember, you asked for this! Honestly what I'm looking for in a fic really depends on my mood at the time.

I am a sucker for academic rivalries, nerdy discussions between the two, great banter, possessive Toms, jealousy from either party, angst (esp from Tom being his own worst enemy and fucking shit up through his actions), Tom underestimating Hermione, Hermione putting Tom in his place, Tom catching feels, Tom in denial, horcrux!Toms, naive Tom/experienced Hermiones (battle worn Hermione are tops), muggleAUs, medieval AUs, time travel, student/teacher, classmates, step-siblings, met: as adults (my current mood), historical settings, time jumping shennanigans, sci-fi, action, duels (OMG fucking badass duels are a weakness of mine), Grindelwald as a common enemy (or Dumbledore I'm not picky), correspondence/pen pals. As you can see almost everything and anything, and then some probably that I've not had the fortune to read yet.

Essentially, I'm all over that fucking Tomione bingo card in what I want to read and what most people could come up with. I will say lately I've been on a magical world kick, so I've not read as many muggleAUs lately. At this point its easier for me to say what I don't read rather than what I do and will if time and life will allow.

I tend to like a very wide range of Toms. He can be extremely evil, like so dark I'm upset with him and myself for still loving him. Because I do love to read a dark and disturbing Tom from time to time, one that almost makes me question my ship. I will read and enjoy snake-faced Tom or pretty boy Tom; I'm long past seeing them as separate entities at this point. However, I'm not limited to only liking dark Toms. I love setups in a reverse scenario where his deeds/misbehavior can be seen as slightly good or somewhat redemptive. I am okay with redemption stories, because as a person who grew up with fairytales; I do like a HEA. I like to keep things mixed up, which is why I love the variety to this ship. I am not too much of a fan of overly fluffly stuff; I prefer Tom have a bit of edge. He can simp but I don't want him too mushy.

As for Hermione, I do love when she's a bit of a bossy swot. Confident and self-assured is my favorite type of Hermione. I like BAMF Hermione's a lot. I admittedly can do a range for her, but my least favorite Hermiones are when she is a doormat in a fic. She has to have some spine and self-respect; if she's too mild-mannered or takes too much of Tom's bs without putting up some manner of fight or defiance, that really kind of pushes it too far out into ooc for me to enjoy. Admittedly, I am not usually into pureblood Hermione, since I love the complication and complexity her blood status brings with her being a muggleborn as her back story.

Also I'm a bit of a monogamous shipper. I'm a jealous, possessive person irl, so it's hard for me to have people I ship be super open and sharing. It's something I'm trying to work on, but it's probably main reason I mostly read this ship only. It's a fault I know, but I'm working on branching out. I have sort of gotten to the level of being okay with triads.

Anyways, sorry to anyone who read all this, I got bored. This shouldn't really even be on Tomione Finds. My apologies. This should be on my personal blog, as I don't know how we'd get the whole of all the admins to try to contribute here when we're all on so infrequently as it stands already. Just a reminder, this is just one person's preference and doesn't represent the whole of the team or any sort of guide as to what anyone else should read. Everyone is entitled to their own likes/dislikes and opinions on their reads, I'm merely answering the ask, way too late at night. -JD

[beileil]

Increasingly Improbable Predictions on Time Travel

Let me preface this by saying that I am not the person to go to for OPM meta discussion. There are plenty of people on Tumblr that are far more talented in that regard. My strengths are fanfic and shitposts, and I’m way out of my wheelhouse here. I considered not posting this at all. But I have a lot of thoughts about Chapter 166, and I need to get this into writing, even if no one reads it and it’s only to keep me from going crazy. Manga spoilers below the cut, obviously. Also some Mob Psycho 100 spoilers that I tried to keep sort of vague? Ready? Let’s get stupid!

I have a prediction brewing and I don't know how I feel about it. I'm not alone in thinking that the latest chapter was much darker than usual, nor in finding the chapter 164 redraw jarring. I'm sure I'm not the first person to have this thought either: What if there are multiple timelines and we're being shown the darkest one? We've seen ONE do something similar with the Mogami arc in MP100, so we know he's good at making both his fans and his characters go through Some Shit, even if the events are an illusion or aren't permanent. (Also see: Mob going ??? in “Even Then ~Continue Forward~”, an otherwise lighthearted episode that ends with a cliffhanger so brutal that the first time I watched it, I gasped out loud, explained to my concerned spouse that my reaction was because I couldn’t believe the writer would actually go there, and had to stop watching for the night. Obviously, everything turned out to be a trick, but this moment stuck with me.)

ONE is a great story teller. He doesn’t need to kill anyone to make his audience feel pain, nor to leave his main characters with lasting trauma.

Now that that’s out of the way, let’s get to my stupid time travel theory, which I’m sure is also not very original.

Now surely (and this is the point you may roll your eyes, but stay with me, I promise I'm going somewhere with it) Blast or one of his crew has the ability to send someone back in time. Like seriously, the guy fights with portals and tried to send Garou to another dimension. Let’s say Blast & Co. can send exactly one person back in time. But maybe time travel takes an extreme toll on the person’s body to the point that normal people can’t survive the jump. Hm...do we know anyone who can withstand any amount of physical stress without getting hurt? Oh, I know! How about we send the guy who uses a magma pool as a hot tub!

Scenario #1 (the “immediate fix”): The Blast Crew can only send Saitama back in time by a few minutes. But it’s enough. Enough to stop Celestial Garou’s radioactive attack. Enough to save his disciple. This time, he doesn’t arrive too late. He arrives just in time, like a true hero should.

Scenario #2 (the least bullshit one): Saitama gets sent back just far enough to stop Garou from getting possessed by God (no ID), and instead of continuing their Fistfight to End the World, Saitama (who is the only one who remembers the Worst Timeline and is just so tired) asks Garou if he's done yet, offers to lend an ear…and the chapter ends with a panel of dragon!Garou sheepishly sitting seiza at a low table with Saitama in an abandoned house floating in the sea. It’s odd to me that the Murata would spend so much time on the original, very different version of Chapter 164, only for it to be scrapped three days later. Maybe this scene does happen…just in a different order than expected. In this scenario, nothing is wasted.

Scenario #3 (improbable, confusing, and meta af, but indulge me please): Saitama gets sent back to some point earlier that day. LET’S GET META for a hot second. I remember reading a discussion by @gofancyninjaworld a long time ago (sorry dude, I tried to find it on your blog but no luck) about how the manga is ultimately written for the people who read it in its final, published volume form. But here's an awful, fun thought: What if the redraws are ONE/Murata throwing an extremely meta bonus to the readers who read each update as it comes out? If there's time travel fuckery involved, it explains at least one of the redraws…or all of them if Saitama were to get sent back further than meeting Awakened Garou on the shoreline. I'm imagining something like the scrapped chapters actually being an alternate timeline where Phoenix Man doesn't become chickified, Do-S and Narinki's mercenaries are killed by Sweet Mask, Orochi is killed by a punch instead of a bathtime mishap, etc. Time travel could also create some fun deja vu moments, like Atomic Samurai telling Iaian "I swear I've told you about this before" about the Sun Blade. Maybe he really did!

Scenario #4 (for lulz only, everyone would rage quit the series if it happened): Saitama travels back in time to the meeting that Sitch calls with the S-class to warn them about Shibabawa’s prophecy. Saitama informs him that the prophecy is about Bang’s student going off the rails. The entire Monster Association arc is canceled. Saitama beats up everyone in the subterranean and takes their gold. Garou gets therapy and a job at Fedex.

Pros of time travel being used as a plot device:

Saitama saving the world and no one knowing about it would be very on point for the series.

Saitama retaining his memories ties in with my earlier point: ONE doesn’t need to kill anyone off permanently to leave his main character with lasting trauma. Even if Genos survives this, I guarantee Saitama will be having nightmares about holding his core in his hand for years to come.

Many fans found Saitama’s comment that he’d “rather destroy the world” out of character for him. The comment makes a lot more sense if he’s already seen the people he cares for…you know.

It makes no damn sense to set up future sub-plots (Garou becoming a hero, a fetch quest for a magic sword, etc.) if everyone is just going to die of radiation poisoning anyway. It’s wasted potential, and as much as I’m hurting, I have faith in ONE/Murata to not do that.

Cons of time travel being used as a plot device:

Let's face it. Time travel as a fix-it is kind of a cop out. The only time I've seen it done well is in Steins;gate. (Which is a brilliant show if you haven't seen it.)

The further back in time we go, the less character development everyone gets. The S-class never learns to work together. Fubuki never discovers her healing powers, or stands up to her sister. Waganma never stops being a brat. Sweet Mask never gets to beat a pep talk into Darkshine, and Zombieman never gets to admit that Sweet Mask isn’t as bad as he seems. The Bad Boys don’t get their team-up. Garou doesn’t get to (try to) tell God to fuck off.

We’ve already seen characters we thought were goners come back through the power of magic (looking at you, Tanktop Master), and if it happens too much, it's going to be difficult to truly experience suspense properly again. The stakes just won’t be there. Every time a character dies, it’ll be a case of the boy who cried wolf. (Or rather the boy who cried, "Can't we just have Fubuki/Blast fix it?")

So I’m conflicted. Would a time travel fix-it make you rage quit the series? Would it cheapen the trauma that everyone has been through, or could it be done well? Or can you not see this happening at all? I guess we’ll find out in two weeks.

#one punch man #manga spoilers #mob psycho spoilers #meta post #manga predictions #a rare serious post from me #well it's half serious anyway #cursing