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#alex and liv: the wonder years
amanda-glassen · 2 years
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The Wonder Years: Part 12
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While getting ready for her first school dance, twelve-year-old Olivia starts a path toward discovering who she is truly meant to be. Parts 1-11 can be found here
Just as Olivia had hoped, Mrs. Cabot was able to drive them to the pizza place. It was her favorite place to go with her mom and her uncle Kyle. She had spent some of the happiest moments of her childhood there-most recently, her 12th birthday and a pizza party with her basketball team. Thinking back on all the memories she had there with her mom made her feel like she had a knot in her throat, but she knew there was no turning back now.
“So, are we gonna kick this guy’s ass?” Elliot asked. Alex giggled, thinking he was bringing some levity to the situation, but Olivia knew her best friend was serious. “Either he’s your dad and we kick this guy’s ass for being out of your life for twelve years or if he’s not your dad we say we’re from To Catch A Predator and kick this guy’s ass for luring a kid. Just point him out and give me two minutes. That’s all the time I need.”
Olivia noticed a man who looked exactly like him sitting at a table for two. “You guys, he’s already here. Let’s go inside.”
Alex grabbed Elliot’s arm and pointed toward where Emerson was sitting. “Thirtysomething guy in the light blue Oxford. Have at him.”
“Hey, Champ!” Emerson called out from the table and waved for her to come over. “I got us a table.”
Olivia thought she was going to keep her cool, but the moment she heard him call her that nickname, she decided to run over to him and give him a hug. “Dad! You’re actually here.”
He tousled her hair, but Olivia didn’t mind. “Of course I’m here. I wouldn’t miss it for anything, but I see you brought some friends. Let’s get a bigger table.”
Olivia had hoped Alex and Elliot would sit at a different table, but when she saw that they had no intention of going anywhere, she was grateful that her dad suggested getting a bigger table.
They found a booth that could seat six and, although there was room for Olivia to sit on the same side as her girlfriend and her best friend, she wanted nothing more than to sit next to her dad. “Dad, this is my best friend Elliot,” Olivia said once they were all comfortably seated. “We’ve known each other since we were in kindergarten.”
“I’ve known Olivia longer than anyone who isn’t a member of her family,” Elliot said, narrowing his eyes at Emerson. “And not once did you try to call her or send her a birthday present or a Christmas present. Why are you trying to be in her life now?”
“Elliot!” Olivia wanted to sink down in the booth or even leave the restaurant entirely so she was relieved when she heard a slight chuckle from her dad.
“No, it’s okay,” her dad told her. “That’s a fair question and one you’re probably wanting an answer for as well.” If she were to be completely honest with him, she didn’t care why he wasn’t in her life in the past as long as he was in her life now. “When your mom first found out she was pregnant, she was in London with your great-grandma Maggie. I was the first person she called and she was crying because she was so scared, but I told her she had nothing to worry about. I was so happy, Olivia. I was gonna have a baby with the woman I love more than life itself. Sure, it was happening almost ten years earlier than we had planned, but we were gonna make it work. We were gonna get married after college. We talked on the phone every night that summer. I remember thinking everything had changed so fast. We went from goofing off and being kids that school year to talking about her pregnancy and making plans for me to fly to LA so we could tell her family together.”
“What happened?” Olivia asked. “My mom told me the story about how you two went from friends to boyfriend and girlfriend and she seemed happy when she was telling it. Why didn’t you two get married and raise me together? What happened?”
Olivia noticed him pressing ignore on a call that was coming through his phone. “Rebecca Barnsworth happened.”
“My mom’s best friend?” Olivia asked with a confused look on her face.
“Did you cheat on Olivia’s mom with her best friend?” Alex asked. 
“You kids are a little young for this conversation,” her dad told them. He was looking down at his phone at a text that had come through. 
“We’re not little kids,” Elliot said defensively.
“Yeah,” Alex added. “Besides, you’re the one who started this.”
“I would have never cheated on her,” her dad told them. “In fact, after it ended between the two of us, I was so devastated that I didn’t even start dating until a couple of years later.”
“So what does Becca have to do with this?” Elliot asked. “I’ve seen her a lot of times at Olivia’s place. She and Serena are best friends so I know she didn’t do anything to her.”
“I never liked Becca and she never liked me,” Emerson began. “In our own childish way, we both competed for Serena. First, we competed to be her best friend and the person she hung out with the most. Then everything changed for me and for Becca. She fell in love with Serena just as I did. Becca will always be that spoiled little rich girl from Bel-Air. Whatever Becca wants, Becca gets, except for Serena. Her family wouldn’t approve of her being with a girl, so she had to keep loving Serena from a distance and if she couldn’t have her then nobody could have her. The night that Serena and I…” she noticed her dad start to fidget, “...the night that we...I don’t feel comfortable saying this but the night that resulted in her being pregnant...something happened that got blown out of proportion that entire summer because Becca convinced her that I did something to her. But Serena was the woman I loved more than anything. I’d never hurt her. The entire thing was just a misunderstanding.”
“That’s bullshit!” Elliot slammed his hand on the table. “You don’t go twelve years without seeing your daughter because of a misunderstanding.”
Olivia looked over at the entrance to see Abbie and Serena walking in. Please don’t sit with us. Please don’t sit with us. “Uncle Emerson!” Abbie called out as she walked over to the table. “What are you doing here with Olivia and Alex and Elliot?”
Serena nearly gasped. “Didn’t you know? Your uncle Emerson is Olivia’s dad, so that makes you and Olivia cousins!” How would she know already? Olivia wanted to ask Serena. I didn’t even know until last night.
By the way they were dressed, Olivia knew they were on a date and she hoped they would quickly say hello and then leave to get their own table, but her hopes were dashed when Serena sat down next to Alex. 
“Aren’t you on a date?” Alex asked her and Olivia could sense that her girlfriend was just as frustrated with Serena as she was. 
“Yeah, we’re walking over to the movies after this,” Abbie responded. “My mom isn’t picking us up for another four hours.”
“...which means we have time,” Serena insisted. With no room left next to Serena, Abbie decided to take a seat next to Olivia and Emerson. “Besides, I have questions for Olivia. The first question is does Jamie have an Insta and the second question is what’s her last name so I can look her up?”
“Jamie,” Emerson teased her. “I think there’s another Serena in direct competition with you for her heart.”
“Oh, I don’t feel threatened by her,” Serena said as she scrolled through Instagram, looking for Jamie. “She’s-what-30? Her days of being pretty are almost at an end. When that happens, I’ll be 17 and Jamie will be mine.”
“And you’re okay with this?” Elliot asked Abbie.
“Considering the odds of Jamie falling in love with this Serena are a hundred billion to one, I’m not threatened in the slightest,” Abbie responded. 
Olivia noticed Emerson searching for something on his phone and she began to worry that he was getting annoyed with all of them. “I don’t think Serena’s days of being pretty are almost at an end. She’s always been beautiful and her beauty is so natural and effortless. My family always said she had this Old Hollywood charm to her. I’ll never forget the first time I saw her. Even with no makeup and her Juicy Couture tracksuit, she looked like she belonged in a magazine.”
“You’re trying to get back with Serena,” Elliot told him in an accusatory tone of voice. “Is that what this is all about? You’re still in love with Serena after all these years and you’re using Olivia as a way to break the ice. You figure you can get on Olivia’s good side first and then win Serena over. That’s not gonna happen.”
“I’m married,” Emerson responded. “I don’t have those feelings for her anymore and I haven’t for a very long time, but she and I will always be each other’s first love. You kids will understand this when you’re older, but you’ll never forget the first person you really fell in love with.” His words were lost on Olivia’s friends, but Olivia couldn’t stop smiling at the thought of her mom and dad once being so happy and in love with each other. “Sport, do you wanna see this video I have of your mom in college?”
She wanted to see the video more than she wanted her bat, maybe even more than she wanted the Mets to win the World Series. What her mom was like during that period of her life was a mystery to Olivia and she hoped the video would be one more piece of the puzzle. “Yeah,” she said nonchalantly. “Okay.”
Her dad pulled out a $100 bill from his wallet and handed it over to Abbie. “Why don’t you kids go order us some pizzas and sodas and anything else you want.” 
Alex and Elliot were hesitant to leave the booth so Olivia gave them a pleading look in hopes that they would leave with Abbie and Serena. “We’re gonna go order the pizzas,” Elliot told Emerson. “But we’ll be thirty feet away and I’ll be looking in this direction the entire time.”
“Your friends are something else,” he said to Olivia once they were alone at the table. He pushed play on a video and handed his phone over to Olivia.
On the video was her mom when she was twenty-one. Her hair was chin-length instead of long and flowing like it currently was and she had winged eyeliner and as opposed to the more natural look that she currently wore. Oh, 2008. 
“Someone just won a second term!” she heard a guy say on the video.
“Is that you?” Olivia asked. 
“Yeah. A group of us had a celebration for her that night after she was elected president of her sorority for a second time, but that morning it was just the two of us in her room. Believe it or not, but there was a time when smartphones were new. Your mom and I always recorded random videos of each other goofing off. I deleted them when we broke up, but I couldn’t get myself to delete this one.”
Within a few seconds, Olivia understood why. Her mom was sitting on her bed in her sorority house and the sight of her made tears pool in Olivia’s eyes. She had never seen her mom so happy and it warmed her heart to know that it was her dad that made her feel that way. “I’m so proud of you,” he told her mom in the video. “My girlfriend is only the second woman in her chapter’s 100-year history to be elected president twice. Our ten-year plan is all falling into place.”
“First, the presidency and then getting engaged next year,” her mom smiled. 
“And then grad school,” her dad continued. “I’ll go for my Masters in Finance and you’ll get your PhD. We’ll start our careers and have a huge wedding.”
“And then come the babies!” her mom said excitedly. “Our little Carmichael babies!”
“How many?” he asked playfully. “Three?”
Her mom pretended to contemplate it. “How about six?”
“Six? Shouldn’t we start now then?”
Olivia heard her mom giggle even if she was blushing the entire time. “Okay, one now and five after grad school.”
Olivia knew they were just teasing each other about wanting their first child in college, but she had never seen two young people as in love as they were and the realization that she was the product of their love for each other made her feel so connected to the world around her. There wasn’t a mystery to solve anymore. She was like her friends. She had two parents who once loved each other and they both wanted her. Olivia didn’t know why her mom was so upset with him, but it no longer mattered because she was going to find a way to get the two of them to sit down together and work out their differences. Even if her dad was married and her mom was with Jamie, she wanted them to at least become friends again and co-parent her. They’d sit together at her games and both go to her parent/teacher conferences and back-to-school nights. She’d even rotate holidays between the two of them and her life would be filled with twice as much love as she already had.
The video went on for another minute with her aunt Lexie and her mom’s best friend Becca entering the room with celebratory cupcakes for the two of them. “My girl is part of sorority history now,” Becca said to them. She then swiped some icing off the cupcake with her finger and smeared it across Serena’s cheek. Olivia couldn’t stop smiling when she saw the frosting fight that resulted from this and how happy and carefree they all looked.
Olivia glanced over at her friends who were next in line and she noticed a look of panic on Alex’s face. The door had just opened and she heard someone walk in, but she figured that couldn’t be the reason Alex was feeling that way. Her mom and dad both know that she’s here, so it’s not like Alex is gonna get in trouble. 
“Everything okay, Sport?” her dad asked. “Do you want to go over there with Alex?”
“Yeah, I should check on her.”
…but Olivia didn’t have the chance to get up before she felt someone approaching their booth.
“I need you to get the fuck away from my daughter!” she heard her mom say. Mom! Olivia felt her heart race. It was no longer just Alex looking in their direction. Everyone at the pizza place was now focused on them.
“Our daughter,” Emerson corrected her. “She’s just as much mine as she is yours, Serena. You honestly thought I was just going to let you keep her from me forever?”
“Olivia, get up!” she looked up at her mom who was now glaring at her. “Get Elliot and Alex and then get in the car. We’re leaving.”
“But, Mom-”
“Now, Olivia!”
“Serena, she’s fine.” She noticed her dad’s tone of voice start to calm and she wondered if it was an attempt at trying to stop her mom from causing an even bigger scene. “I just wanted to get to know her. Her friends are here. We’re just about to have some pizza. To show that I have the best of intentions, you can even join us. You and I haven’t seen each other in over twelve years. A lot of time has passed. We’ve both grown up and moved on with our lives. It’s all water under the bridge.”
“Water under the bridge?” Serena scoffed. “You think what happened was just some breakup or some misunderstanding and hurt feelings?”
When she first heard her, Olivia assumed this was going to end with her dad getting soda from a nearby glass thrown at him or with her mom telling him off or maybe even all of them being told to leave the restaurant. What she didn’t expect was for her mom to sit on the seat across from them and have a breakdown before their very eyes.
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companion-showdown · 3 months
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Showdown 2k24 Nominations!
alright, redoing this post now that I can give a concrete start date of Monday the 15th of January!
Nominations for the tournament are open up until the start date, and you can submit anyone who could reasonable be considered a companion, either by sending me an ask or by filling out
this form.
If you make your nomination via the form you can also submit some propaganda to go alongside the poll. Anyone who was considered a regular at any point in the last year will automatically be included, as well as anyone who was in the original tournament (+/- a couple I might miss or misremember as being a regular because I don't have old lists anywhere). The exception to this is last years winner, Rose Tyler, she will not be getting a place in the main tournament, however after the final I will run a poll to see if our new winner can beat her. (oh and also maybe I'll leave the TARDIS out but not fully decided yet)
The tournament is going to be run in the same way I did @adventure-showdown, meaning I'll keep companions from different periods of the show and different mediums segregated at first so the nicher ones don't immediately get knocked out, and slowly get mingled together. The exact details are going to depend on just how may characters get included.
Errm yeah, so go wild, nominate whoever you like (as long as they are a companion). If they are from teh TV show they have to be on this list to qualify, and for EU companions I'm going with them needing a TARDIS wiki page, and also I will give them a quick proof read to make sure they pass, the bar is low but it is there
if you want to submit an alternate version of the character sorry but main version only unless you can give a really good reason, eg regenerations of a time lord
also, if they are primarily from another franchise that'll be a no
The full list of contestents is under the cut and will be updated as nominations come in. Its sorted by medium and then to be alphabetical by first name. if an eu companion exists in multiple mediums i just sort of picked one or I put them under the other category, people who exist in real life are also sorted into their own category. There are some characters under Classic Who/NuWho who were not companions on TV but were in the EU. Companions who's names are in green have had propaganda submitted for them, if they're not in green then they don't, and just because someone has propaganda doesn't mean i wont accept more
Classic Who
Ace McShane
Adric
Barbara Wright
Ben Jackson
The Brigadier
Chang Lee
Dodo Chaplet
Grace Holloway
Harry Sullivan
Ian Chesterton
Jamie McCrimmon
Jo Grant
K9
Kamelion
Katarina
Leela
Liz Shaw
Mags
Mel Bush
Mike Yates
Nyssa
Peri Brown
Polly Wright
Romana I
Romana II
Sabalom Glitz
Sara Kingdom
Sarah-Jane Smith
Sergeant Benton
Steven Taylor
Susan Foreman
Tegan Jovanka
Turlough
Vicki Pallister
Victoria Waterfield
Zoe Heriot
NuWho
Adam Mitchell
Amy Pond
Bill Potts
Canton Everett Delaware III
Clara Oswald
Dan Lewis
Donna Noble
Graham O'Brien
Grant Gordon aka the Ghost
Handles
Inston-Vee Vindor
Jack Harkness
Karvanista
Kate Stewart
Martha Jones
Mickey Smith
Missy
Nardole
River Song
Rory Williams
Rose Noble
Ruby Sunday
Ryan Sinclair
Wilfred Mott
Yasmin Khan
Audio
Alex Campbell
Anya Kingdom
Bliss
C'rizz
Cass Fermazzi
Charley Pollard
Cousin Eliza: Christine Summerfield: Horus
Dalek Test Subject 2
Erimem
Evelyn Smythe
Helen Sinclair
Hex Schofield
Iris Wildthyme
Liv Chenka
Lucie Miller
Mark Seven
Molly O'Sullivan
Narvin
Oliver Harper
Sheena (The Starship of Theseus)
Tania Bell
Novels
Anji Kapoor
Anna (Good Companions)
Badger
Barusa
Bernice Summerfield
Business woman (Time on a Vine)
Catherine “Cat” Broome
Chris Cwej - have propaganda but in conjunction with another contestant
Cinder
Claudia Marwood
Compassion
Dorothy (The Wonderful Doctor of Oz)
Fitz Kreiner
Guinevere Winchester
Hector (All Flesh is Grass)
Homunculette
Ikalla
Irving Braxiatel
Jack McSpringheel
Larna
Marie (Alien Bodies)
Milena
Patience
Penelope Gate
Peter Summerfield
Rosie Taylor
Roz Forrester - have propaganda but in conjunction with another contestant
Ruth Leonidas
Sam Jones
Serena
Sibling Different aka Mae
The Mortimer Family (Ida, Alan, Helen, George)
Trix MacMillan
V.M.McCrimmion
Wolsey the Cat
Zeleekhà
Comics
Abslom Daak, Dalek Killer
Angus ‘Gus’ Goodman
ARC
Chantir
Child Master (The Then and the Now)
Cindy Wu
Dave Lester
Destrii
Duh
Flanx
Fey Truscott-Sade
Frobisher
Gabby Gonzalez
Gillian & John Who
Grayla
Hattie Munroe
Izzy Sinclair
Jayne Kadett
John Jones
Josie Day
Kroton
Ly Chee the Wise
Majenta Pryce
Maxwell Edison
Olla
Rose-the-cat
Shayde
Ssard
The Squire
Weeping Angel (Origins)
Real Life
Alan Turing
Claudia Winkleman
John Lennon
Jules Verne
Mary Shelley
Peter Cushing
Other
Alison Cheney
Andy Davidson
Antimony (Death Comes to Time)
Brian the Ood
Dormouse (The Red and the Blue)
Emma (curse of fatal death)
Koschie
Romana (Battle for the Universe)
Splinx
Susan Who
Tom Campbell
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tunemyart · 11 months
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a/o folks, please enjoy another addition to my continuing vaguely-crackish 10-year follow up to The Wide Orbit, working title "three seasons* of elliot wondering where olivia's terrible husband is"
*it's actually going to be like a season and a half but it's a bit now
---
When the door opens, he almost does a double take. “Alex Cabot,” he says, dumbly. Because it is Alex Cabot, older like the rest of them and looking completely unsurprised to see him.
“Elliot Stabler,” she returns, every bit as cocky as she’d been twenty years ago.
He bumbles his way through an I wasn’t expecting to see you, because what’s it been, Jesus, thirteen years? He can’t even remember the last time he thought about her. He assumed he’d never see her again. All the times he’d thought about Liv back in the States, it had somehow never even crossed his mind that she was back in touch with Alex Cabot, who he’d figured was still in Africa, or some even more remote place, trying to scratch whatever itch under her skin she never could seem to get to. But here she is, waiting a little less patiently for him to get his shit together.
“Sorry, that came out wrong,” he says. “How the hell have you been?”
She ducks her head and smiles, crossing her arms and leaning her hip against the doorjamb as she lets the door close most of the way behind her – that’s right, Liv’s kid is probably sleeping somewhere behind it. It’s an oddly familiar move, and when he places it he knows why – it’s Olivia he’s seen do it a million times.
“I’ve been good,” Alex says softly. “I came home from the DRC a while ago, quit prosecution. I’m doing pro bono work now in private practice.”
It’s great, it is, but all Elliot can think about is this jerkwad husband of Liv’s who apparently can’t even be bothered to be at home at 11pm with his kid while Liv’s on duty somewhere and has stuck Alex Cabot of all people on babysitting duty.
“Wow. That’s a change,” he says. “Congratulations.”
“Thank you. Liv’s stuck on a case,” Alex fills in for him when she starts to read his impatience in his body language. Her eyes on him are steady and unoffended. “She’ll probably be at the precinct until late if you need to see her tonight.”
And Alex knows this because... she doesn’t expect that Olivia’s husband will be home before Olivia? Elliot tries to give the guy the benefit of the doubt. Maybe he’s travelling. Maybe he’s got work, too. Maybe he’s in the hospital. Maybe it’s just bad timing. God knows he’d stuck Kathy with the assumption that she’d have to be the on-call parent often enough.
“You know, I think I’ll just try to catch her tomorrow,” he says with a smile to mask anything else she might get off him; and then, because it’s true, he hesitates for a minute and says, “Hey, it was really great seeing you. If you’re free, do you want to catch up sometime?”
“I’d like that,” Alex says, but her voice is guarding something. Probably her loyalty to Olivia, if they’re really close enough again these days that she’s somebody Liv calls at night to watch her kid.
“No pressure,” Elliot says in case it’s needed. “I bet we’ll be seeing each other around, anyway.”
Alex laughs at that. “Yeah,” she agrees in a tone he can’t completely read. “I’m sure we will.”
“Okay. Take care.” Elliot hesitates, but is completely honest in saying, “I’m glad you and Olivia are back in touch.”
It’s because he’s known her for so long that he’s able to spot the pause before she says smoothly, “Me, too.” Her face is completely impassive when Elliot searches it curiously. She uncrosses her arms to reach behind her and push the door open again, and there they are – double rings on her left hand, too.
Has everybody gotten married while he was gone? Ten years, he guesses; why not? But the gap between him and his past – and more to the point, between him and Olivia – feels wider and more uncrossable than ever with Alex Cabot the sudden, strange face of it here guarding her doorway.
He can’t tell if Alex has noticed him noticing when he looks back up at her. “Good night, Elliot,” is all she says.
And Elliot, who can sometimes take a hint, says, “Good night,” and leaves.
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innytoes · 2 years
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More Triffid AU thoughts because apparently the book stuck with me even though I read it like 15 years ago.
-So Reggie wakes up to his brother screaming that he can’t see, and freaks out, and rushes to get help only to open the door and it’s chaos outside because pretty much EVERYONE can’t see. His parents are gone (or did they even come home?). He does the first thing he can think of: put Stevie on his bike and ride to the Molinas, dodging and serving blind pedestrians along the way.
-The band was supposed to have a Meteor Watch Party, which Reggie missed, but it is very convenient because everyone is already in one place. They quickly piece together what happened, because Reggie (who slept through the meteor shower) is the only one who can see.
-Reggie and Carlos quickly retrofit their zombie apocalypse plans. He feels bad raiding a grocery store, even worse raiding the pharmacy, but Alex needs his inhalers and if this isn’t temporary, things could get very bad very fast.
-He realises this when he’s nearly kidnapped by a cop who can’t see anymore, who tries to hold him at gunpoint and force him to be his guide. (He throws a can of beans at a car, making the alarm go off and distracting the cop, and hightails it out of there, figuring out pretty quickly that letting anyone know he can see is a very, very bad idea.)
-Luke 100% is the first to stop freaking out because they can still play music, right?
-Over the next few weeks, things both get very bad (fires, car accidents, desperate people) and then very quiet. Reggie spends time raiding more stores for supplies (sometimes with the help of Luke or Ray, though he hates the idea of putting Ray in danger when he has kids to worry about).
-He also goes around to all of their family’s houses. His parents are nowhere to be found, but he packs up some stuff for him and Stevie. Tía Victoria isn’t home, and the hospital she works at is such chaos that Reggie quickly flees.
-He never, ever tells Luke what he found on the Patterson’s street. And he makes sure that if they ever regain sight, Luke will never, ever see it either.
-He visits Flynn’s family, and they seem to be doing more alright than the other survivors he’s passed that are still in their homes. Probably because Flynn’s mom has been blind for most of her life already. The first thing Flynn says when she realises Reggie can see is: Reggie, give it to me straight.... does my outfit clash? (And if Reggie has a little hysterical breakdown at that, well, he’s earned it.) Eventually, they all agree to move in together, because it’s safer to stick together.
-Alex’ parents and family aren’t home, but he said to check at the church as well, which he does. He’s surprised to find that there are a number of sighted people at the church, so he lingers at the open door and stares blankly at a spot on the wall and listens to the sermon. When he starts hearing words thrown around like ‘gods will’ and ‘women of breeding age’ and ‘repopulation’, he decides it’s time to get Alex’ sister out of there really fast. He speeds back to the house to get Alex (since he’s not sure if Olivia would come with him if without that).
-When Alex arrives, Reggie carefully leads him to Olivia. Alex tells his folks he’s taking Olivia, and that there isn’t shit they can do about it, because they can’t see. (Olivia is more than happy to go with them if it means not being a baby incubator.) They get out, leaving Alex’ parents behind wondering if Alex can see (he can’t, but with some silent directing by Reggie he could fake it). They did agree beforehand if anything were to happen, Reggie would grab Liv and run.
-100% Alex made sure his parents thought that The Gays were Immune, which probably put a spanner in the whole cult thing the people at the church were trying to set up.
-The amount of anxiety Alex goes through, not only being blind but now being solely responsible for his sister, it’s pretty intense. Especially when you can’t just run away and hide or go for a walk alone to clear your head. There’s a lot of frantic drumming.
-Ray teaches Reggie how to drive, even when blind. He’s mostly working off muscle memory, listening to the sound of the engine, and hoping Reggie’s good enough at steering to not hit anything. They don’t need to go fast, but being able to drive means fewer trips to the supermarket. (Also, when Alex eventually bangs through one of his drums and freaks out, Luke and Reggie go get him a new one. A blind Luke in a music store is a Bad Idea and he’s banned from subsequent trips unless he promises to hold Reggie or Julie’s hand the entire time.)
-Eventually life quiets down, which is both good and horrific if you think about it long enough. They move Flynn’s family into the Molina house. They start checking all the houses and figuring out who is still there, who is gone. Reggie buries more bodies than he cares to remember. But it’s better than his friends tripping over them in the streets.
-Then, the triffids break out of their farms and it’s like the apocalypse all over again.
-After a few years they do have things pretty under control. They’ve fenced off a large part of the neighbourhood. The only other survivor in the fence is an old lady that Reggie goes to check on every day, until he doesn’t have to anymore. She wrote him a note in frightening good penmanship for someone who couldn’t see, that he didn’t need to feel bad, but that her meds ran out a long while ago and she was ready to go meet her husband.
-Every week they patrol the fences and set fire to any mature triffids they find. Who would have thought anyone would trust Luke with a flamethrower, let alone a blind Luke?
-Flynn’s dad used to be an electrician and they rig up some was to get power and collect and purify water.
-The sheer feels of Ray teaching the boys how to shave without being able to see. (Luke complains about having to until Julie is like: no kisses until you get rid of that itchy upper lip. He turns around real fast after that.) 
-Willie was locked in the basement as punishment by his shitty evil foster dad. When Caleb figured out what was going on the next day, and that people who didn’t see the meteors could still see, you better believe he made sure to cuff Willie or tie him up so he couldn’t escape and use him to his advantage.
-Eventually Willie manages to escape, possibly by luring Caleb over a cliff or to a triffid or something.
-Willie settles in to the Molina-Taylor homestead pretty easily. He’s fed properly, they let him skate around the abandoned streets, Carlos even helps him build a ramp. He can see Reggie is nearing a breaking point and takes over some of his tasks.
-Every evening Reggie helps Flynn find the clothes she wants to wear. When Willie comes back with clothes from his raiding-outside-the-neighbourhood trips, he always makes sure to describe them to Flynn in detail so she knows what she’s wearing. He gets her the most fashionable clothes he can find.
-Don’t think about Ray getting sick and getting a fever, and Reggie insisting he’ll stay up with him because he’s the only one who can read the thermostat (besides Willie, who was out all day trying to find meds and is exhausted.) Don’t think about people trying to tell him they’ll just wake him for the reading and he’s already doing so much.
-Don’t think about Reggie shouting ‘He’s my dad too!’ at Julie before immediately apologising, because of the yelling, because of course it’s not the same and he isn’t really...
-And Julie just hugs him and tells him of course Ray is his dad too, but he’s stretching himself too thin. They compromise, Reggie will stay with him until his fever breaks.
-As the teens grow into adults, there are some very serious talks about Privacy. It starts with rotating who gets to sleep out in the studio. Eventually, Julie and Luke move into the house next door, possibly with Flynn (and a good pair of earplugs). They tear down the fence between the two properties for easy acces. Maybe even build a tunnel connecting the two.
-Mr and Mrs Taylor across the street. They’d move back to their house, but it’s too far down the block to be safe. Still, everyone spends a few days moving around furniture to get the house to their liking.
-Alex, Reggie and Willie don’t move out, though they might move into the studio loft. Sometimes when needed, Reggie or Willie will sleep over at one of the other houses. But Alex is way too anxious to learn a whole new layout of a whole new house, and he doesn’t want to leave Liv alone, even though tells Alex it’s fiiine, she’s practically an adult now, Lex. (”You are sixteen! That is not an adult! I don’t care if it is the apocalypse!”)
-After the first successful beach trip, they maybe take a few more in larger groups. Not too often that it becomes a routine, because leaving their home defenseless is a bad idea. But for very special occasions, they do.
-It is a very awkward conversation when Julie is like: hey Reggie can you do me a favour and tell me if this has one line or two lines? Yeah thanks that’s what I thought so anyway I’m pregnant. And Reggie is like WHY DID YOU JUST SHOVE SOMETHING YOU PEED ON AT MY FACE before realising what this means and then he’s ecstatic and calling dibs on godfather and second-coolest uncle (after Carlos of course.)
-Luke and Julie 100% had a discussion where the went back and forth between ‘should I take a pregnancy test and ask Reggie or Willie’ vs ‘do we just not say anything and hope nobody bumps into Julie until Reggie or Willie very awkwardly brings up her giant stomach’ but in the end they decided they probably needed to tell people because of the whole ‘eating for two’ and ‘Willie can you please go and steal some pregnancy vitamins’ thing.
-They all live happily ever after except for the whole triffid apocalypse thing.
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cas-blog-hanl · 6 months
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Creativity - Writing continued
Burn out is a horrendous thing I think most of us had to deal with at least once in their lives. It is a burden, a rock strapped to your back which you have to lag around with you even when you're not doing the thing that burned you out in the first place.
Last month I had created stories with the use of DND mechanics. It was fun, exiting, new and a wonderful experience. However, it was also tiring and frustrating when something really doesn't go to plan.
So this month I decided to step back a little, go back to my roots of funky little characters who only needed to worry about real life and not surviving monster attacks or demonic possessions. Not that real life is that much less scary but at least I can use my actual experiences instead of try to make EVERYTHING up.
It was refreshing, to put it simply. Not having to worry about really specific things or coming up with wild scenarios which would fit perfectly into everything else was freeing. It crumbled the rock, at least partially, so that it was easy enough to just carry it in my pocket instead of drag it behind me.
Here is a little excerpt of one of my stories.
[Guilt built up in Alex as the words of the younger washed over him. The pain in Dominic’s eyes were just a reminder of how badly he had failed his little brother before. Alex was in a very dark spot about two or three years ago. Cory and Dominic - and Liv - are the only ones to actually know what exactly happened. Not anyone else. That period of his life was bad, horrible, a dark stain on who he was and is. Stupid decisions and even stupider actions which left permanent bruises on both his body and mind. But he was better now. The medication was working, the therapy was helping and the support he received - and is still receiving - was grounding him in reality of now and here. This was different. 
“Oh, Donnie. It’s not like that I promise. You would know if it was like that because I made a promise. It’s just…” he was lacking words. He didn’t know what to say, how to describe the inner turmoil that was happening in his brain. How could he put the things he was feeling into words. He felt as if it would just come out as a senseless rant. 
Dominic’s head slightly tilted to the side, his eyes opening slightly as if to show Alex that he was listening. That he was encouraging the older to continue. He would accept a senseless rant, it was just important for him to know that Alex would be heard. 
“Fuck, I don’t know what’s going on, Donnie. I just feel like I want to peel my skin of my body. Everything looks, seems, feels wrong. My voice is too deep, my jaw too sharp, my shoulders too wide. I want to change something. I need to change something about my appearance. I don’t feel real. I don’t feel like myself.” 
Alex’s hands traveled to his hair during the rant, his slim fingers gripping his light brown locks and tugging, the slight pressure giving him a semblance of control. Dominic’s hands also found their way into his hair, gently untangling the elders fingers and holding them in between his palms, forcing the other to stop subconsciously hurting himself. A small grimace found its way onto his face at his brother returning to his unhealthy habit of hurting himself while in distress. 
“What do you want to change?”
That question stumped Alex. Mainly because he was not expecting the younger to react this calmly to his outburst of emotions. He quickly spared a glance towards Monia and Hyowon but the two where still deeply focused on their conversation. A small sigh left his lips. What did he actually want to change about himself? 
An image immediately flashed into his mind. High stockings, dark makeup with a pretty red lipstick, a skirt accentuating his waist… No. He couldn’t think of that. He didn’t want to think of that. It was too hard to think about that. 
 “Alex?”
“I don’t know.” 
Neither of them where satisfied with that answer. ]
August
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"While getting ready for her first school dance, twelve-year-old Olivia starts a path toward discovering who she is truly meant to be."
Written by the incredibly talented @wine-drunk-on-elizabeth
Part 1
Part 2
Part 3
Part 4
Part 5
Part 6
Part 7
Part 8
Part 9
Part 10
Part 11
Part 12
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oopsabird · 3 years
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One of the other boats I’m paying attention to that’s stuck in the Suez debacle and has decided to wait it out is THIS one:
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I know, I know, I can hear you saying “What the fuck, Liv. That’s not a ship, that’s an attachment for my vacuum cleaner that lets me suck up dirt out of hard-to-reach crevices.”
Nah man, hear me out! It’s a boat I promise!
This is the FJORD FSTR, and it is currently anchored amidst the ships nearest the canal entrance in the Red Sea, waiting for the clusterfuck to unfuck itself:
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Now, much like you probably do, when I first happened to click upon the VesselFinder profile of this vessel and saw that photo, I had some serious questions. Namely, uh:
what is that for, and uh,
why does it look like no boat in the history of boats has ever looked before?
it says it’s a passenger ship and it looks HUGE, are there hundreds of disgruntled passengers stuck on there???
Scrolling through the specs on FJORD FSTR’s profile for the beginnings of answers, one SUPER interesting thing immediately jumped out at me:
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WELL. Now that deserves some googling.
(Aside: hehe, “year of built”)
Anyway. Google was super helpful and immediately eager to fill me in about this ship, and inform me that she is:
a fancy-ass catamaran-style car and passenger ferry,
destined to operate across the strait between Denmark and Norway (“between Kristiansand and Hirtshals”, to be specific),
equipped to hold 1200 passengers and MANY cars,
capable of a top speed of 70km/h (!!!)
totally brand spanking new.
How new?
I’ll take “the company that ordered her literally only took possession from the shipyard on February 26th” for five hundred Alex!
Turns out there ARE no passengers on this ferry yet, because it hasn’t even reached its actual operating location yet!
After being launched at the shipyard in the Philippines last month, it has been picked up by employees of the operating company (Fjord Line) who have been taking it home from the store the only way you can, with a 109m long massive floating lego block: by driving it there, empty and shiny and with the dust covers probably still on the instrument dials, in what was expected to be about a 4 week trip with an April 1st arrival.
Now, obviously from the Philippines to Denmark is a looooooong trip. It’s been a long trip so far just to get to the Suez Canal, an approximate route shown here in blue, and I’m sure both the crew and the ferry company paying by the hour for them to sail the shiny new toy home would much prefer that the rest of the trip be the much shorter Mediterranean route in pink, rather than going the looong way around Africa. But boy oh boy is there something funny about them going so far, after nearly a month at sea, only to end up stuck in traffic just a week or so of sailing away:
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(I have no idea if they would or wouldn’t cut through the English Channel, but I didn’t feel like trying to draw it while not putting a line through Kent or whatever)
No wonder they’re willing to wait around in line and gamble that the canal will be cleared sooner rather than later! Especially when you consider that they already sold off the ferry it’s supposed to be replacing lol.
But wait, there’s more!
I may have lied, a little bit, earlier, when I said that there were no passengers on the FJORD FSTR during this delivery voyage. That is, strictly speaking, only half true.
While nobody has paid to take part in this voyage so far, there are some additional folks onboard who are not crew, but are being paid to be there:
Oh yeah, you read that right.
In addition to the 11 Fjord Line crew members operating the ship, for their passage through the particular bunch of waters they have currently been (unexpectedly) spending a week sat in, FJORD FSTR has embarked an unspecified number of persons who make up a “specially trained safety team”.
All this in the interest of deterring any potential pirates who (in the minds of these Danes) might look at this gargantuan floating slide whistle and start rubbing their hands together eagerly — or whatever paranoid Scandinavian ferry owners imagine tempted pirates might do. (Why desperate people like the Somali pirates would go after the big red empty Borg Cube when there are literal dozens of loaded-full cargo ships anchored as far as the eye can see nearby, is beyond me, but who am I to question rich Scandinavians lmao.)
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So like, next time you’re having a weird week, try asking yourself:
“But am I having a weirder week than 11 sailors trapped indefinitely on a massive empty ocean-going luxury vape pen, with a team of hired guards, in the middle of the Red Sea during a crisis, hoping desperately against all clues to the contrary that they’re not about to live out the catalyzing incident of a Bond film?”
Odds are, probably not.
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Last Christmas
Day 2
What if the reunion never happened and Robert did go home with Mike? What would next Christmas look like?
(AO3 link)
*****
That’s why I need to do this, step aside, let you go
“Aaron! There you are, I’ve been looking everywhere.” Vic comes bouncing up to him, nearly making him drop his pint.
“Where?”
“Home, the scrapyard.” She waved a hand at his rolling eyes. “Anyway, me and Adam, we’re having a party on Christmas Eve and you’re invited. With a plus one obviously.”
“Like that’s going to happen the way my life’s going.” He looked at her. “Is Robert going to be there?”
“I think so. It depends if…well if Mike’s working or not. But say you’ll come, please! Adam will be so disappointed if you don’t.”
“Maybe.” He can already see the pout starting. “I said maybe Vic.”
“You know you broke up with him, you went to the hospital last year and told him you couldn’t be with him. He moved on Aaron, so maybe you should too.” With that she’s gone and when he turns back to his drink he sees his Mum looking at him. “What?”
“Nothing. She is right though, there’s no point wondering about what might have been. He’s happy, maybe you need to try and find that too. I thought that Alex…”
“No.”
“Aaron, you didn’t give him a chance.”
“Because it was never anything more than a couple of dates. You and Liv kept pushing so I just put up with it but I was bored Mum.”
“Well someone else then. Just because he wasn’t right doesn’t mean someone else won’t be. Oh don’t give me that look.”
“They won’t. You don’t get it. I had perfect, I had the right one and I let him go.”
“He broke your heart.”
“I broke his too, more than once. You never got it, me and him. All you saw was the bad stuff. I saw that too but I also saw the real Robert.”
“I am not going to apologise for disliking the man who hurt you Aaron.” She sighed, reaching for his hand. “If you really feel that way, why don’t you try. Maybe he feels the same as you.”
“He doesn’t. You’ve seen him with Mike, they’re good together and now he sees Seb every other weekend. I’m not wading in and ruining that.” He downed the rest of his pint, needing space. “I’m going home.”
“Aaron no…stay, we’ll talk.”
“There’s nothing else to say is there. I’ll see you tomorrow.”
_____
What kind of friend would you be to me Aaron?
He hasn’t see Victoria since she invited him and he’s risking breakfast in the cafe, hoping she won’t ambush him again. He’s very tempted by the party but he knows it’ll be awkward.
He’s met Mike more than once since the night outside the club, and he’s nice, he’s funny and he’s probably perfect for Robert, but they’ve been fleeting occurrences, in the pub or at village events because every time he sees them he remembers what he’s lost. He doesn’t know how he’ll feel about attending a Christmas party with them together.
“Tea please Brenda, and not that weak stuff you normally make, a proper cuppa.”
“Manners cost nothing you know.”
“Making friends again I see.” Robert’s voice comes from behind him and he swivels round. He looks amazing. Now he’s got past everything with the Whites and his stupid revenge he looks so much happier, more relaxed. The little boy he’s holding onto has helped with that he knows. “Hi.”
“Hi. Hey Seb, you keeping Daddy company today?” He tickles the little boys foot, making him giggle and squirm in Robert’s arms.
“Yeah, we’re going to buy a Christmas tree, aren’t we, eh? Cos Mummy is feeling extra generous and letting you spend Christmas with me.”
“Really?” He knew that Rebecca could still be difficult when it came to access although Robert is grateful for any given what had happened. “That’s great Rob, really.”
He steps back, can feel himself acting like they’re still together, the soft voice he uses, everything that he shouldn’t be doing unless they’re together.
“Brenda, make it to go will ya?” He yells into the back, ignoring that Robert looks disappointed. “Early pick up.”
“Yeah course. Um…Vic mentioned she’d invited you to the party.”
“Thinking of giving it a miss.”
“Oh. Well I was going to say, if it’s because of me, me and Mike, we just won’t go.”
“What? No. Don’t be daft. Vic’s your sister. Not really my thing to be honest.”
“Since when?” He shrugs not looking at him, grateful that Brenda hands him his tea and he can leave.
“I’ve got to go. See you around. Bye mate.” He tickles Seb once more and he’s gone.
As he’s driving out to Hotten he thinks back to the year before, having to take Rebecca to hospital, feeling completely out of place and then Robert was there and they couldn’t stop staring at each other. He’d thought he’d hate the little boy, thought he could never look at him and not see Rebecca, remember what happened. In reality it’s nothing like that, he’s just a little boy, cute as hell and looking exactly like Robert. He's even watched him a few times when Robert or Vic have been in a fix. He can’t help thinking that if he’d felt that way the year before that none of it would’ve happened, he would never have broken it off and he wouldn’t be alone now, watching Robert move on.
_____
I care about you more than I care about myself which is a lot
The day of the party dawns and he’s still adamant he’s not going. His Mum and Vic have been on at him all week but he keeps telling them he’s decided. He hasn’t seen Robert since the day in the cafe, keeping out of the way, staying at home once he’d closed up the yard. He’s decorated and everything, mostly for Liv, but she’s off in Ireland now so he’s alone. He’s supposed to be going up to the farm for Jessie and Marlon’s wedding the next day but he can’t be bothered, will probably spend the day playing video games or binging more Top Gear. He has no desire to be jolly and happy at a wedding when his life is such a mess.
A part of him keeps thinking about the party and whether he should go. Adam’s been on at him all week in that puppy dog way of his and he doesn’t want to let him down. It’s been a tough year for him and finally he’s starting to come out the other side so he should support him. He also think it looks like he’s avoiding Robert and even though he is, he doesn’t want everyone else to know.
He’s still undecided by the time the party is meant to start and he argues with himself a bit longer before making a decision. He can’t avoid every party or place Robert goes to forever, not unless he wants to become a hermit. Decision made he runs upstairs, putting on his best jeans and shirt, tells himself he’s not making himself look good for anyone, but he’s not convincing.
His confidence falters the nearer he gets to the house but he makes himself carry on and then he’s being grabbed by Adam.
"Get off! Shouldn’t you be in the house?”
“Beer run. Decided to come then.”
“Couldn’t leave you pining for me now could I?”
“Robert’s here.”
“And?”
“Just sayin’. You’re looking smart. Not dressing up for anyone are you?”
“You of course. I can’t keep it in any longer. I’ve tried mate, but I just can’t get over you.” He teases him, ducking away from his as he goes to shove him, laughing for the first time in days.
Vic’s house is small enough that you can’t avoid people, even at a party when it’s full, and he spots Robert straight away. He’s wearing his favourite shirt, the dark blue one with the white specks like the night sky. He loves that shirt. He swallows and looks away as he smiles at Mike, turning to grab a can from the side. He should’ve stayed at home, everyone’s in a couple except him it looks like.
“Aaron! You made it.” Vic shouts from across the room, making Robert look over, smiling at him, him nodding back. Would it ever not hurt, would he ever stop blaming himself.
“Couldn’t have you saying I never make an effort could I?”
“You know he misses you.”
“Vic, don’t.”
“I’m just saying, he might be with Mike and they might be happy but he misses you.”
“Like you said he’s happy, and that’s good so…let’s just leave it yeah?” She nods reluctantly and he can’t help hugging her. She’s his oldest friend and he hates that disappointed look she gets. “Now, are you going to put some decent music on?”
_____
I’ll be the best friend you’ve ever had
He’s coming out of the bathroom when he bumps into him. He’d managed to avoid an actual conversation all night but now there’s no avoiding it.
“Alright?”
“Are you avoiding me?” Typical Robert, never one to bother with small talk.
“What? No. Why would I?”
“That’s what I wondered. Did I do something? Was it the other day with Seb?”
“Course not. Anyway where is he tonight? Thought you’d be doing the whole milk for Santa thing.”
“Diane’s got him, pretty much snatched him from me on the doorstep. He’s too young for that anyway. Still didn’t answer my question, because you are avoiding me.” He’s had enough now, he’s the one all over his boyfriend and he’s asking Aaron what the matter is. He has no right to be annoyed but he is and he can’t just switch it off.
“You’re imagining it.”
“I’m not. You were the one who said we could be mates and just lately you’re like a cat on a hot tin roof every time I’m around. Have you got a problem with me and Mike? Or is it that he’s a guy? Not what you expected. Thought I’d ‘go back to women’ or whatever it is you’ve concocted in your head.” He flushes at that, knew he’d never been the most understanding or considerate when it came to Robert’s sexuality, his own insecurities getting in the way of supporting him, but he can’t listen to it, he’s getting too close to the truth. He couldn’t care less who he’s with or what gender they are, it’s the fact he’s with anyone at all that’s bothering him.
“Get lost Robert.” He pushes past him and runs down the stairs and out the door, ignoring his shout, no idea where he’s going.
He doesn’t stop until he’s at the bridge. Their bridge. He laughs to himself, they didn’t have anything any more.
“Thank God you’ve stopped running, I’m out of shape.” Came the breathless voice behind him.
“Go back to the party Robert.”
“No.”
“You’re annoying you know that?”
“It’s been said. Come on, talk to me. We always used to be able to talk. What’s wrong?”
“Nothing. Just leave it.”
“I’m not stupid. I know what this is all about. What I don’t get is why. I thought it was because I was with Mike but we’ve been going out since February and you and I were fine ’til just recently.”
“You don’t know anything.”
“I know that you’re wishing we were still together, that you hadn’t told me you couldn’t be with me last Christmas, that I hadn’t told Alex I was letting you go.” He looks up at him. “Do you think I don’t think the same thing?”
“You…you do?”
“Yeah. For a minute back then I thought you were going to say you’d dumped him and wanted me back but then your face changed and I knew, so I said what I did. It was for the best.”
“Was it?” He didn’t see how, he’d been miserable for most of the year, just getting by.
“Yeah, because you and me, like I told him, it was intense, but…”
“But…I don’t understand why you told him you were letting me go. Just the night before you made this scene in the pub, all it’s you and me Aaron, it always was and it always will be or whatever and then you just act like it’s nothing.”
“It was never nothing Aaron. It hurt more than anything saying what I did.”
“So why do it then?” He shouts into the night.
“Because I had to, because of the things I saw.”
“What?”
“When I was unconscious I kept dreaming, the same thing over and over, but not."
“I don’t understand. You dumped me because of a dream?”
“I didn’t dump you, we weren’t together.”
“Ok Mr pernickety. What did you dream about that you didn’t dump me over.”
"I don't want to talk about it."
“You brought it up.” Robert moves as if to leave. “Oi, you followed me out here to try and drag some kind of confession out of me and now you’re going to leave when I try and do the same?”
"I..." He blows on his hands, stalling for time. "It was like a nightmare, the same thing over and over. You know like Groundhog Day?” They’ve never spoken about this before but Aaron can still remember getting the call from Alex telling him Robert was hurt, that it was bad. He’d never been so scared.
“Eh?" He rolls his eyes.
"The film…with Bill Murray?" Aaron shakes his head. "Right, my new years resolution is introducing you to nineties movies."
"Alright Grandad."
"I'm serious!"
"Yeah, yeah...so what it was just the same dream?"
"Yeah. But each time it was a bit different…Lawrence, Rebecca, Lachlan all stopping me from getting to you. Then it changed...it was Christmas and then it wasn't. Everyone was in black and I didn't know why.” Suddenly he grabbed Aaron's hand. "It was your funeral and Val was there saying all this stuff like I was bad for you, that if I didn't let you go then it'd all be true."
"It was just a dream Robert...that's all. A weird one. but just a dream."
"But what if she’d been right? What if in the end I’d push you so far that…you’d already hurt yourself because of what I did.”
“Not just because of that, and I make my own choices Robert. Do you honestly think my life until then would’ve been better without you?”
"You obviously did, you said we couldn’t be together. What was I supposed to do, get down on my knees and beg you to take me back? Lose what tiny shred of dignity I had left. You made that decision Aaron, you were very clear about that.”
“When I came to the hospital I was so sick of everyone telling me what to do. I had Mum and Paddy all day going on about you nearly dying, almost like they were disappointed, and then Vic started lecturing me on how I should be sure and how I should be lucky I had someone at Christmas. Then I come to see you and before I can say anything you’re telling me you’d told Alex you were letting me go.”
“But…”
“I was just so angry Robert, and scared. I’d nearly lost you and it just felt like you didn’t want me, so I took the easy way out, didn’t want to fight, didn’t want to deal with all the stuff going on. So I stayed with Alex, thought it was for the best…and it was. Look at you Robert, you’ve got your life back on track. You’ve stopped that stupid revenge thing you had going on and sorted proper access to your son with Rebecca, you’re with Mike and he seems great.”
“He’s not you.”
“Maybe that’s the point.”
“It’s not. Are you happy? Honestly?” He opens his mouth, all ready to tell him the truth but he can’t, the words won’t come.
“Happy’s overrated. Maybe I don’t know what that is.”
“You did, with me, didn’t you?”
“But it ended.”
“Because of me.”
“Because of both of us. We both made mistakes. I took drugs, I pushed you away. It’s not all on you and I should never have said it was. Maybe it doesn’t matter, maybe it would always have ended. Maybe we were always meant to be just a short lived thing.”
“I don’t believe that.” He moves closer, crowding him against the bridge rail.
“So why are you with him? Why didn’t you fight for me? Tell me I was wrong.”
“Because sometimes you get tired of fighting.” He moves away then and Aaron feels cold. “It wasn’t easy being with you. I mean it was, when it was just us, but it never was. There was always something. Your Mum, Paddy, they hate me and maybe they’re right, but to have that constantly thrown at you is exhausting. Then there’s Liv. I love her Aaron you know I do but I always felt like I had to prove I liked her, that I had to fight for your attention. Maybe that’s why I did what I did, I don’t know. All I know is that some days it felt like I was so low on your list of priorities it wasn’t worth it any more.”
“I’m sorry.” He swipes away the tears that have started falling. “You never said anything.”
“I didn’t think I should have to. Aaron when all this was happening you’d just been through the worst thing in the world. I had to…no I wanted to be there for you. I wasn’t about to burden you with my petty worries. Then there was Holly, and the accident and…then Bex arrived and I just focussed on the money like I always do.”
“For the right reasons though, for Andy, for me and Liv.”
“Didn’t work though. Then I lost you, and I know it was my fault, whatever you say, I broke us.” Robert stares down at the water. “Last Christmas, on that road, if I’d known that car was coming, I don’t know if I would’ve cared.”
“Don’t say that.” He grabs his arm, holding on for dear life. “Robert…”
“I had nothing Aaron. I’d lost you, I’d lost my home, my son. What was the point?”
“Me. You always had me even if we weren’t together.” Robert shook his head. “You did and I’m sorry if you didn’t realise that. I would never have let you deal with it all alone but you always seemed ok, like you were enjoying getting them back.”
“I was at first, wanted them to pay, but then Seb was born and it didn’t feel right after that but I’d gone so far I couldn’t undo it. Then they found out and I lost him. Maybe my Dad was right, maybe I just mess up everything.”
“No. He was wrong Robert. That man didn’t know the first thing about you. Look what you’ve done for me. You found Liv, you saved my life, more than once…”
“I only did what needed doing. I wanted to give you so much Aaron, everything you deserved.”
“I only ever needed you to love me Robert, and you did. You loved me like no one else ever has and I’m sorry I wasn’t there for you like you have been for me.”
“We can’t change it now can we?” He looks up at him, wanting to ask, to see if there’s the slightest chance. He’s even leaning in for a kiss before he can stop himself.
“Here you are.” He steps back as he hears Mike approaching.
“Sorry. Just wanted some air.” Robert sniffs, trying not to let his boyfriend se he’s been crying.
“My fault, kept him talking. He’s all yours.”
“Aaron wait…”
“It’s alright, think we said everything, don’t you? Merry Christmas Robert. Hope the two of you have a good one.”
_____
It’s you and me, it always has been, it always will be
He doesn’t go back to the party, goes home instead, opens another beer, laying down on the sofa wondering just how much of an idiot he must be to even imagine that Robert might want to give them another chance. He was happy, it was Aaron who was miserable, who couldn’t move on when he’d had the chance to the year before. It was all him. How he was going to face him now he didn’t know.
He doesn’t know when he fell asleep but he’s woken by a banging on the front door. He stumbles to his feet, scrubbing at his eyes as he pulls the door open ready to shout at whoever it is at this time on Christmas Eve, when he sees Robert.
“You just ran.”
“You had Mike.”
“Aaron…” He looks around. “Can I come in?”
“Why Robert? We’ve been through everything.”
“No we haven’t. You’ve had your say but I haven’t had mine.” He stands back lets him inside shivering against the cold. “This time last year I’d just been hit by a car and it gave me a wake up call, a wake up call that I desperately needed.”
“Rob, I don’t…”
“Shut up a minute, will you.” He shuts his mouth, sinking on to the arm of the chair. “You’re so infuriating some times, always think you know what I’m going to say.”
“Sorry.”
“Stop apologising. You didn’t do anything wrong! Anyone with an ounce of sense wouldn’t give me a second chance and I’m on about my fiftieth with you. You were going to kiss me weren’t you, back on the bridge.”
“It was just…”
“I wish you had.”
“What?”
“You heard me.”
“What about Mike? You’re happy.”
“Yeah, we are. But he’s not you and he never will be. That’s why I told him it was over.”
“What?”
“That’s nearly as bad as the apologising. He already knew it wasn’t going anywhere. He knew before I did. But…you and me, I don’t know.”
“So why the hell are you here?”
“Because I want there to be you idiot! But it’s not just me anymore and I don’t want to do this and make a mistake. I can’t lose you again Aaron, I won’t survive it.”
“So we talk. We never talked Robert not really and that’s on both of us.”
“And you can deal with Seb, with Rebecca because she’s around Aaron, she has to be.”
“I know. I’ll handle it. You know I love him Robert, it was never about him. I want to know your son, to be around him as he grows up. And Rebecca, it won’t be easy but I’ll deal with it. I told you, it wasn’t on her. We broke us.”
“Your Mum will hate it.”
“I don’t know, she might surprise you. Anyway I don’t care. I never have, have I? If I’d got rid every time she told me all your bad points we wouldn’t be here now would we.” He sighs, “What about you? I’ve not been the best boyfriend have I? Some of the stuff I said, about you, your sexuality.”
“It’s done Aaron. It hurt but…you get it now yeah?” He nods. “Then it’s fine. Like you said we need to talk. I never really told you how much it hurt when you said that stuff, because deep down I thought that I deserved it, like my Dad said.”
“No Robert…no. You’re amazing and he was wrong, so so wrong. So was I, and I’ll be better. I haven’t supported you the way I should, with my family, with Liv, with anything. But I will. You’ve always been there for me, now it’s time for me to be there for you. If…if that’s what you want.”
“I…can we really do this? Have a life together?”
“Yeah, I think we can. This time we know the mistakes we’ve made so we don’t make them again. All we can do is give it our best shot. Til we’re eighty, remember?” Robert laughs and he gets up, pulling him to his feet. “I love you, that never changed, never went away.”
“I love you too. Can’t believe this.”
“Promise, you’re not dreaming.” He kisses him, holding on tight as if he’ll disappear if he doesn’t. “Merry Christmas.”
“Merry Christmas Aaron.”
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cataroo · 2 years
Text
Resident Alien 2x02 "The Wire"
Another week and I have more Resident Alien thoughts! I have to start this week with a couple of complaints though (only because I love this show so much). -this episode in particular felt rushed. The timescale is also really compressed, which I think doesn’t help— it’s been a whole week since the S1 finale and I think it would give the show a little breathing room if things were spread out just a little bit more, maybe.
-this is a SyFy specific problem, not the show, but if feels like they have cut but the budget and it's very obvious, especially in some of the outdoor shots which are clearly greenscreened.
-Harry seemed to have regressed a bit this week and this is where I think the compressed timescale is hurting the show a little bit. Obviously growth isn't necessarily linear and Harry still has a lot to learn but I also feel like we should be seeing some progress/growth with him there and we're not yet. Which is hard because we've had a whole year to wait for this and not nearly as much as passed in the show. So I probably need to adjust my expectations there. But as always, Max, Sahar, and Harry continue to be comedy gold with each other. I did love his creepy dream sequence at the beginning, though, just to really enforce his feels for Asta.
-Dan’s conversation with Asta, while totally a conversation that they need to have, felt like a continuation of a scene we didn’t see and felt out left field for where it was placed in the episode, though it definitely has a lot of relevance to the episode. I wish maybe this scene had come after Harry confessed he was going to save Asta because I really feel like she needs someone to talk to about this shit (see also: TELL D'ARCY THE SECRET).
-Harry is all aboard the “I love Asta” train and while I don’t blame him one bit, I think it’s also 100% legit for Asta to feel overwhelmed by this singular intention. It looks like Alex Borstein’s in the next episode, so I imagine Asta will be pushing Harry to go on a date with her as part of trying to get him to learn to love humanity and not just her.
-On the other side, Asta knowing she has the ability to influence Harry due to how much he likes her and using that to manipulate him to do good was pitch perfect. You could call it underhanded or sneaky but honestly— relevant to her convo with Dan, she has to be feeling a huge weight on her shoulders as one of the few people that actually knows what’s going on. Even though she promised to keep Harry’s secret, she’s not putting her family (and the world) at risk. Also I love love love the detail of her having turned off the outlet so she wasn't at risk but Harry doesn't know this.
-Can we talk about how Harry literally broke down a door to 'save' Asta and how fast he moved? I love getting reminders that Harry is still an alien underneath his human disguise-- more on that later!
-Asta being confronted by Jay's adoptive mother was painful, but she did cross a line that as an adult, she should know better. I wonder if we'll see more of this if Jay does decide to involve Asta more in her life.
-continuing to love the dynamic between Mike and Liv. It's not completely equal, but Liv is standing up to Mike more. Also their bits are comedy gold. The spying, the undercover work, the poker game... all freaking hilarious. Liv's theory about Harry being a hired hit man is similar to one I've had rolling around in my head for awhile-- my theory is that Harry is working as some kind of mob doctor/fixer.
-Judy as the 'murder town' tour guide was pitch perfect. The whole 'vacation town' seems like a pretty standard B-plot for a dramedy set in a small town, though it's hilarious to think anyone outside of the immediate vicinity would actually care about a random murder in a random small town. Hey, maybe having their own alien will be a tourist draw, haha.
-so let's talk about those survival spheres. There were four. One was used to make the bunker. One was used so Harry could transform into Asta (which leads me down a tangential rabbit hole-- is he only able to hold one molecular disguise at a time? So if he actually changed into Asta, he would lose the Harry form? That's my current theory). So that leaves two spheres left-- one in the cabin and one stolen by Max. My hunch is that the stolen sphere will be a Chekov's gun of sorts... we'll see if I'm correct. Do the spheres do different things? Can they do anything Harry wants?
-also got an answer for Max speedrunning puberty; it's the sphere. Messing with his hormones which?? Okay, sure whatever. Makes about as much sense as anything else. I'm wondering if this has a point or is just supposed to be "alien".
-I do love seeing Harry going into dangerous alien mode. Alan Tudyk gets that one expression on his face and you can tell he's thinking murder. Personally, I love this a lot and I like when it happens because we get used to see Harry learning how to be human and the comedy around that, when he's still quite dangerous.
-how is Mike and Liv seeing two Astas at the end of the episode going to play out next week?! Are more people going to learn Harry is actually an alien? Will he erase their memories somehow? I think it would be kind of cool if they actually got looped in on the secret and they all had to solve the mystery of why humanHarry killed Sam Hodges. Definitely looking forward to seeing how this is resolved next week!
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marchtomydrums · 3 years
Text
Beautiful Creatures 4
Olivia Benson X Reader
Rated M for future chapters 
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Of course, when Olivia suggested the three of you spend some time together you were ecstatic. However, now you're feeling a little shy. Alex is gorgeous and smart and she and Liv mesh so well together and then there's you.
The evening has been smooth so far but most of the conversation is between Olivia and Alex. The two of them tell you stories about the old days and the squad. It's actually pretty funny to listen to. After dinner Olivia suggests that the three of you enjoy some wine in the living room. She offers to make the glasses while you and Alex head into the room. You make your way quietly to the couch with Alex close behind you. She smiles at you as the two of you sit in silence.
“So y/n Liv tells me you're going to classes for your Masters's degree?”
“Ah. Yeah. I should be finished by May of this year.” you say smiling shyly.
“That's wonderful. Education is Important.”
“Yeah. “
The two of you smile while the room grows quiet again. Alex sighs before she turns towards you.
“Listen, if you're unsure about all of this it's okay. I'll understand and so will Liv.”
“I'm not backing out.”
“I just wanted to remind you. I mean I'm honestly shocked,” she says. You tilt your head slightly bewildered by her statement.
“Why are you shocked?”
“If we're being honest I'm half your age.”
“So is Olivia.”
“I know but you too are in a relationship.”
“And?”
“And, I'm just shocked but also i’m flattered,” she tells you smiling.
“I want this. I'm a little nervous I'm not going to lie but that's not because I'm unsure.”
“Then what is it?” Alex asked you sighing.
You blush as you start your explanation “you're insanely hot and smart and it makes me nervous.” you tell her fidgeting with your fingers. Alex smiles taking your hand into her causing you to look up at her.
“There's no reason to be nervous. None of us have had a threesome before. And just so you know the feeling is mutual. “ she says holding your hand in hers. Alex tugs on your hand pulling you closer to her “come here.” You scoot closer to her on the couch trying not to hold your breath as her hand Caresses your cheek. She leans in slow enough for you to pull away but you don't. Her lips move closer and closer to yours until finally, they meet. The kiss is soft and slow and her lips are soft and move easily against your own. You moan into the kiss as it becomes more intense. Alex pulls back smiling at the way you tried to follow her lips. Your eyes open gradually as your heartbeat slows down. Once your eyes are fully open you look at Alex. She's smiling ear to ear “did you like that? she asked.
“Mmhm,” you say nodding your head. The two of you were so caught up you didn't notice Olivia watching from a distance.
“Holy shit,” Olivia said a little too loudly causing you and Alex to look over giggling at her shocked expression.
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amanda-glassen · 3 years
Note
But would Serena would swap out Jamie's workout playlist with a Zombie Chase workout?
(I feel I already know the answer, but wanted to check)
Yes. Yes, she would, and I loved this thought so much that I had to write a drabble about it. (But it's technically not a drabble because it's over 1000 words). I love these two idiots so if you have any other horror/autumn-themed requests I will gladly write them.
Slightly less than a month after their wedding, Jamie found herself back in Beverly Hills for Thanksgiving with the Benson family. It was her first time spending the holiday away from home, but with Serena’s family in Beverly Hills and her family in New York, they agreed to alternate between the two cities for the holidays. The morning after Thanksgiving, Jamie decided to go down to one of the basement-level rooms that had been converted into a gym. Her wife had stayed up watching Krampus and Black Christmas and a few other slashers with her siblings and Olivia the night before because they were considered holiday movies in the Benson household. At twelve, she felt Olivia should be watching The Grinch and she shook her head when she realized it was too late for Olivia; she had already become one of them.
So while the rest of the Benson family was still asleep, Jamie pressed play on her workout playlist and started running on the treadmill. She was five minutes into her workout when she heard someone start to describe a zombie apocalypse story and was given the revelation that a horde of zombies was chasing her. “Damn it, Serena!” she said as she put the treadmill in cool down mode.
“You rang,” Serena said jokingly, standing in the doorway in some flannel pajama pants and one of Jamie’s hoodies.
“I’m not even gonna ask if this was you,” she said as she stepped off the treadmill. “I know it was, but the joke’s on you because it actually seems interesting.”
“Come back to bed, Jamieson,” Serena insisted. “I like smelling you when you’re all sweaty.”
Jamie grabbed her phone, towel, and water bottle. “I wouldn’t admit that to too many people, Ser Bear.”
Although her workout didn’t last long enough to break a sweat, Serena cuddled up to Jamie in their bed and nuzzled into the crook of her neck. “This is your usual scent. I wanted my sweaty wife.”
Jamie couldn’t help smiling when she saw Serena’s pouty face. She placed a kiss on her wife’s forehead and started to rub her arm. “What’s come over you?” Jamie chuckled. “Are you pregnant? Did I knock you up on our honeymoon?”
“Just the opposite,” Serena responded. “The bloodening has happened earlier than expected. I’m cramping and I want cuddles.”
“Did you take something?” Jamie asked. “Want me to get you some Advil? A heating pad? Your cranberry tea?”
Jamie felt her wife pinch her lips shut. “Stop talking, Jamieson. No words. Just cuddles.”
“You know what’s really good for that time of the month?” Jamie asked once she was finally able to speak. “Exercise.”
“Ugh,” Serena groaned. “I am trying to not feel miserable.”
“A lot of couples exercise together. I think it’d make you feel better, too. You could cut down on the caffeine and actually have natural energy. Maybe if we both change our eating habits too it’ll-”
“You’re not attracted to me anymore?” Serena immediately sat up. “Are you cheating on me, Jamieson? What’s her name? Do I know her? Is she younger?”
“What?” Jamie asked in disbelief. She noticed the look in her wife’s eyes, the look she saw in movies right before wives killed their husbands. Be careful, Jamie. Not only is it her time of the month, but she’s crazy even on her best days. “Serena, no one has ever loved anyone as much as I love you and I’d rather gouge my own eyes out than check out another woman.”
With that statement, Serena’s mood went from homicidal to soft. She pulled Jamie back down to cuddle her, making her feel grateful that she had said the right thing. “Good,” Serena said as she cuddled up to her again. “Because if I ever caught you checking out another woman, I’d gouge your eyes out myself.” And we’re back to homicidal.
“I’m sorry, Ser Bear. I didn’t mean to make you feel bad. Wanna know something funny?”
“Always.”
“That first Saturday morning we spent together and you wore those athletic leggings and a sports bra, I got the impression that you were one of these women who went hiking or went to the gym on a regular basis. I thought it was something we had in common.”
“Yeah, that couldn’t have been further from the truth,” Serena smiled. “I wear those athletic pants when I’m too lazy for regular pants and, as for the sports bra, that all comes down to me not wanting to wear anything with underwire during the weekend.”
“I’m gonna get you to workout with me. I think you’ll like running if you use the zombie app.”
“My zombie apocalypse plan is not to run, Jamieson,” Serena said defensively. “If all you do is run, you’ll be running from zombies your entire life. My plan is to kill.” Imagining this 5’5”, 108 pound woman as a killing machine would have been laughable to those who didn’t know her, but Jamie felt it was entirely possible. “If the zombie apocalypse were to happen, my family and your family are going to the house by Tahoe. The whole reason that house was built is because Great-grandpa Benson went crazy and became a survivalist.”
“Serena, I know you’re messing with me again.”
“No, it’s true. One day back in the ‘90s, he just went crazy and had a house built with crawl spaces, a lookout tower, and a basement that could withstand an atomic blast. That last one is up for debate though. He also has a weapons room.”
“Like guns and knives?” Jamie asked nervously. “There was a shit ton of weapons in the house that we spent our honeymoon in?”
“Guns, knives, the bow and arrow he taught me to use when I was seven,” Serena said nonchalantly. “Lexie had her cheerleading. Kyle had baseball. I learned to kill a man from one hundred yards away.”
“That’s impressive and...frightening.”
Serena reached over and gently smacked Jamie on the behind. “You’re safe with me, Pumpkin Butt. You can like...plant us a garden or something while I protect our families.”
Jamie held Serena close until she fell asleep, careful not to disturb her. I love you, my little zombie killing machine.
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Rating: M
Trigger/content warnings: Alcohol, bar setting, angst, implied car sex
Spoilers: Lead
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Evocations: XX
Olivia stood in the shadows near the entrance of the bar, taking the opportunity that the last few days of working hadn't afforded. Across the room sat Alexandra, downing lime cocktails; the blonde that, until the afternoon three days prior, she hadn't laid eyes on in four years.
"I wasn't drafted. Jack asked me."
She supposed that she should be angry that it had taken three years and Jack McCoy to get Alexandra to show her face again. But as she stood taking her in, the only thing she felt was a deep sense of relief.
"That was a great thing you did," Olivia said when she stepped up next to the ADA.
"You mean pull my head out of my ass?" Cabot quipped, tipping ice into her mouth.
"Oh, c'mon now," Liv smirked, sliding onto the seat next to her, "you must've known your whole high-powered Bureau Chief thing was never going to fly down here in the gutters with the riffraff."
"I had time to get used to the easy win over the moral high ground," Alex agreed. "Drink?"
"Can't," the brunette shrugged, curling dark hair behind one ear, "I'm driving."
"Since when do you rent in the city?"
"It's not a rental; I own it."
Alexandra's eyes widened around the crunch of ice between her teeth. "You bought a vehicle?"
Liv nodded, her gaze sliding to the countertop as Alex motioned for another drink. "You didn't call," she said quietly, swallowing against her rising emotions.
A blink would've missed the miniscule wince that flickered across Alexandra's face. She cleared her throat. "It wasn't personal," was her answer, "I haven't spoken to anyone . . . from before."
Before, and after. No matter what happened since or going forward, those were the two books that everything was measured against, for Alex.
Olivia took an unsteady breath. "Not personal. Alex - "
"Olivia," Alex interrupted, "please don't."
Liv's eyes filled with tears of which she was immediately ashamed. "So that's just it, then?"
"We have to work together."
"Oh." The brunette's gaze sharpened. She nodded curtly. "You're right." She stood abruptly, and walked away in the same direction she had approached from.
The spot where she had parked the convertible was dark, and the lot big and empty as Olivia crossed it, digging in the pocket of her jacket for the keys. She was still only halfway to the car when her ears pricked at the sound of a second set of hurried steps behind her. All her muscles tightened as she strangled the keys in her hand and closed the last distance.
Alexandra stopped short about ten feet from the driver's door and let out a low whistle. "When you do something, you really do something," she commented of the vehicle.
Turning to face the blonde again, Liv crossed her arms over her chest and didn't respond. The cool night wind ruffled the blouse just inside the ADA's jacket as she sighed and looked skyward above the rim of her dark glasses.
"What do you want me to say, Liv?"
"You could have at least told me you were out of the program."
"I didn't talk about it with anyone! I came back and started again as if it was just another move in the program. Jesus! I was engaged over a year and even they didn't know anything about Valez and Connors!"
The more Alexandra tried to explain, the more nauseous Liv got. At the idea of her being engaged to someone else, Olivia lurched unsteadily and tried with bleary vision to find the key that would unlock the car. As Liv turned to slot the key in the lock, Alex strode forward and slammed her hand onto the shiny black chrome door, her body pushing into the brunette's space.
"Don't you get it, Liv?! I'm not the same person that I was!"
"The hell you're not," Olivia hissed, and bit her lip that dared to tremble.
"I'm not! Six and a half years I spent on the run, leaving half-lived lives in my wake! I still never feel safe or grounded anywhere. I drop people, jobs - everything - at a moment's notice. That's not what I originally promised you. That's not what you deserve."
"Your engagement?" Liv asked quietly.
"I ended it."
"The job you took for Jack?"
"I only agreed because he said it would be temporary."
Olivia's breathing was thin and ragged. "So if he hadn't asked . . you were just never going to see me again? Never going to pick up the phone and call?"
Alexandra closed her eyes, stilled in the night air. The scent of Liv's shampoo was just under her nose; the bodyheat of her anxiety thrumming just warm enough that the blonde could feel it filling the space between them.
This time when she spoke, her voice betrayed her and broke. "I don't know. Forever is so long. Six years hasn't changed the fact that all I really want is to fuck you on the hood of this sinfully hot car."
Liv sniffed and chuckled. "I don't know if Dolly would approve."
"Dolly?"
"The car."
"Mm. I should have guessed," Alex nodded knowingly and then turned her head just enough to press her lips to the feverish skin of Olivia's neck. "How does this thing do on the open road?" she rumbled.
Liv pressed back into Alex's kiss and murmured, "Tell me where you want to go, Counselor."
.
.
The rhythm of the waves hitting the shore of Fort Tilden beach was calming. The sound snuck softly into the backseat of the convertible parked on the shoulder of a sandy dune covered in scrub grasses. Across the back seat, Alex and Olivia spooned nude, under a blanket made of their jackets.
Both women were soothed, somewhat, now that they had claimed one another's bodies again; proving to themselves and one another that time couldn't take everything from them.
Liv curled her fingers tighter against the fingers of Alexandra's hand around her own and brought them closer to her mouth. "How many other women have you loved, in your six years?" she asked quietly.
The blonde pressed her warm body into Liv's and rested her chin at her shoulder so that her mouth when she spoke was just above Liv's ear.
"None," she said simply.
Liv turned, struggling to see Alex's face, her brown eyes wide.
"That surprises you?" Alex smiled, "Why? Men are easy, if all I need is sex. I don't pursue women unless I want emotion - and I haven't had the space for that in six years."
Olivia took a breath that reached all the way to the bottom of her lungs and felt something deep inside her loosen in selfish, strange relief.
"What about you?" Alex turned the question back curiously. "Have you bedded yourself a team of blondes in my long absence?"
"Don't be ridiculous," Liv chuckled, wrinkling her nose.
"Mm - I didn't really think so, although ..."
"What?"
"I often wondered if I would come back and find you and Elliot married with a few of those little Catholic children he's so fond of," she admitted.
Another strange alcove in the hidden parts of Olivia startled and throbbed at Alex's words, but the brunette wasn't about to trot out her feelings on the subject.
They wouldn't run away together. They would likely never have the life they had originally intended to share together. But they had whatever it was between them that made it easy to reconnect. They had this intimacy that compelled them into each others' depths.
Liv listened to the ocean crash and turned beneath Alex, taking one of her hands and pushing it over the rise of her pelvis invitingly. "Again," she murmured, licking a short warm line with her tongue over the salt-sweet skin of the blonde's neck.
With a contented sigh, Alex moved her fingers lightly and kissed Liv's mouth.
"Yes," she assented.
TBC
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bilingualfiction · 3 years
Text
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Me Quedo - L&O SVU Fanfic
Prompt: Family
Relationships: Alex Cabot x Olivia Benson
Warnings: none.
Summary: After three years Alex is back from WPP - but she’s not alone.
A/N: Thanks to @swimmingstudentchaos891 who came up with the Antonio Movement. This turned out way softer than I intended. I apologized in advance for the bad Spanish 😅
Read on AO3
They meet again in the middle of a street during a high profile case. The vic is still inside the house, dead. A diplomat 's wife.
“The ADA is on his way,” Captain Cragen told them, “I told you this was important.”
“Actually,” one of the homicide detectives chimed in, “the ADA is on vacation but his sub is already here.”
“Alex?” Elliot spotted her first. With the same suits and high heels she used to wear three years before, Alex approached them with a regarded smile.
“Hey, guys. I was going to tell you I was back but the case came first.”
Olivia was caught so off guard that it took some seconds before she realized that Alex was really there.
“Wow, it’s so good to see you, Alex. How long has it been?” She wanted to jump in front of the blond. Hug her, squeeze her. The situation was less than ideal though. She was trying hard to curb her enthusiasm.
“Almost three years,” Alex answered, smiling at the brunette detective.
“Alex,” Captain Cragen greeted the blonde, “I didn’t even realize so much time had passed.”
“You didn’t miss me, then?”
“We all missed you, Alex.” Olivia answered.
Cragen excused himself to talk to the homicide captain and Elliot, Olivia and Alex moved to the sidewalk to wait for the turn to go in the house.
“It’s really weird to be back,” Alex commented, “especially since everyone thought I was dead.”
“Yeah, that has to be weird.”
Work called them and they had to stop their catching up sooner than they’d have wanted. About an hour later things had moved along and they were together again at the same sidewalk
“We gotta go, Liv. Melinda is waiting for us. Alex, don’t go missing on us. Drinks” Elliot pointed at Alex before adding, “tonight.”
“I -”
“Come on, Alex,” Olivia begged, “three years! We deserve it.”
“Yeah, yeah ok,” She relented, “O’Malleys? Is that still a thing?”
“Of course it’s a thing. 8pm. Be there”
When they got into their car Olivia was still smiling.
“Someone is finally looking happy,” teased Elliot.
“Shut up and drive, Stabler.”
___________________________________________________________________
The next day started too early for Olivia. They ended up working late and their get-together never happened. That wasn't anything uncommon, it just bothered Olivia that she didn’t have time to spend with Alex.
“Sorry we had to cancel at the last minute, Alex.”
The counselor was sitting in the squadroom after visiting the captain’s office. Just like old times. Just like three years of no contact hadn’t happened.
“It’s the job, I get it.”
It was only them at that time. Everyone else was busy on their many cases. Olivia was busy too, but she had seen the blonde leaving Cragen’s office and couldn’t help but make time to chat.
“But today… I mean, Elliot has a thing with his family tonight. Fin is outta town for the week. Cap has dinner with the high ups. Munch is….no, I won’t pretend to know what Munch is doing.”
“But you’re free?” Alex eyebrow lifted up, a small smile forming.
“I’m free.”
“Great,” she said firmly, “so let’s do something.”
“O’Malleys?” Olivia suggested.
“Actually… Would you like to go to my apartment? I swear I won’t cook.” Alex was already up. Her cell phone was buzzing, probably working calling her back to her office.
“Yeah, I’d love to.”
“Ok, it’s a date,” She winked before leaving the room.
Olivia spent the rest of the day wondering if she had dreamt that last part of their interaction.
___________________________________________________________________
Olivia got a text from Alex around 3pm. She didn’t even know she still had her number.
Hey, Liv. It’s Alex
Forgot to say I’m in a new place.I’ll give you the directions here. I also didn’t mention we’ll have company tonight. I think you’ll like him.
See you later
Olivia was devastated. She tried not to but it was hard. During these three years she had time to confront her feelings towards Alex. She supposed she always knew she never felt strong enough to act on her feelings for far too many reasons. There was also the fear that the blonde wouldn’t reciprocate. Now, after everything and all the time apart - Wasn’t Alex just flirting with her a couple of hours before? Was she so in love that she had made everything up in her head?
In the end, the reality was that she was going to her friend's house later in the day to probably get to know her new fiancé. With that in mind, Olivia moved on with her day - now much more sullen.
___________________________________________________________________
When Olivia arrived at Alex’s new apartment they had hugged each other for so long that Olivia thought they would never tear apart again. They both had tears in their eyes when they finally moved away from each other.
“Feels like we’re finally seeing each other for the first time,” said Alex while she guided Olivia inside the apartment.
"I know. It’s complicated, our job…”
“Told you I wasn’t cooking but I do have wine.”
“So, who am I meeting again?”
“Curious, huh? I wanted to tell you before but everything happened so fast.”
“I heard about it. The case, I mean, your situation.”
“Yeah. I did spend some time with my parents before coming to the city but I was,” Alex shook her hands in front of her face, “not in the right mind, I suppose.”
With wine glasses full they moved to the living room. Alex’s apartment was much bigger than hers. It looked like it would be bright and cozy during the day.
“Three years in WPP will do that to you.”
“That’s what my parents said,” she took a sip of her wine before continuing, “I’m better now. Working on it. Besides, I’m not alone anymore.”
“So, about that. Are you going to tell me or not?” She had wondered about this the entire day. Olivia had resigned herself. She at least had her friend back. She would be happy for Alex, no matter what.
Just as Olivia was taking a deep breath and Alex was opening her mouth to tell her the news, they heard a door opening. From the main bedroom a little chubby boy appeared in the corridor. He was holding what looked like a gameboy. He looked towards them with curiosity.
“Hey, Antonio.” Alex called, “this is my friend Olivia. Remember her?”
Antonio smiled shyly, waving at the detective. He continued his path towards his room without saying anything.
“I don’t think he does.” Olivia laughed as the boy entered his room.
“Probably not. But I talked about you all the time - he knows who you are.”
___________________________________________________________________
“So, you just adopted him?”
Alex had finished telling her a brief summary of everything that had happened in those long three years.
“Liv!” Alex scolded her.
“What?” She really didn’t mean anything bad. It was mostly a surprise. She had to admit she never thought about Alex and motherhood.
“Well, if you put it that way. I don’t really know how to explain, if I’m being honest. You know me. I’m an objective person, I know exactly what I want. But this, Liv. I didn’t know what it was. I just knew I had to be with him, no matter what.”
“That’s beautiful, Alex. I think that’s love.”
“Perhaps. It hasn’t been easy. I - I really didn’t know what I was getting into.”
“Do you regret it?” Olivia asked even though she already knew the answer. She could see in the blonde’s eyes while she was telling her the story that adopting Antonio had been the right choice.
“Not for a second.”
“You’re a mom.” Even if it felt right now it still surprised Olivia to think of Alex as a mother.
“I - is that weird? I guess I am. I’m still shocked whenever I think about it. It all happened so fast. One day I was worrying only about myself, about my career, my next step. Now I have this whole person who’s completely dependent on me. It 's scary and surprisingly amazing”
“I bet. I mean, I can only imagine.”
It wasn’t a secret to anyone about how much Olivia wanted to become a mother herself. And it wasn’t a secret to people who were close to her how much she was scared of that. There were many issues with motherhood and Olivia.
“What about you, Liv? Regrets?”
___________________________________________________________________
“And these were from a couple of weeks ago, at my parents,” Alex was finishing showing the pictures she had taken during her time in WPP, “we stayed there for a bit before coming back - I told you that, right? Here,” she said, pointing to a picture of Mr. Cabot sitting in a kitchen, grinning with Antonio on his lap. “Dad’s so in love with Antonio. I think he secretly always wanted a boy.”
“What about your mother?”
“Here, look,” She took another picture from her stash. It showed Mrs. Cabot, an older version of Alex, smiling in a garden. Antonio holding her hands, gazing up to her with adoring eyes. “They just instantly bonded, it’s a little unsettling.”
“Alex!”
“I’m serious. I think Dad was jealous ‘cause he thought Antonio would love to hang out with him and his cars but he was hypnotised by mom and her garden.”
“I don’t think your father is the only jealous one.”
“I - you’re right. I’m a little obsessed with him. In my defense, he’s a great kid.”
___________________________________________________________________
There was a lot to talk about, so much to fill in about each other's life. When Olivia realized it was almost time for dinner and the little boy would soon come back to the living room, she decided to take away what she had been wondering about all this time.
“Alex, are you - ?” She didn’t have time to finish.
“No,” Alex said firmly, “are you?”
“No.”
Olivia couldn’t even process how much relief she was feeling at that moment. She had spent the entire day dreading the moment she would hear about how happy Alex was with another person.
“Good.”
___________________________________________________________________
“So I’ll order pizza, I hope that’s alright.”
“Sure. Let me -”
“Liv, no. It 's just pizza. I think I can treat you with some pizza, right?”
It arrived rather quickly and they moved to the kitchen to get everything they needed for their meal.
“Can you put this down? I’m gonna call Antonio.”
___________________________________________________________________
“Put it away, Antonio. Time to eat.”
Antonio, who was sitting next to Alex and in front of Olivia at the dinner table, begrudgingly shoved his game under his sit.
“What are you playing?” asked Olivia.
"Pokémon." Antonio looked at her warily. She usually had a good rapport with kids. Everyone praised her for being good with victims. She remembered Antonio as the chubby little kid, scared out of his mind after losing his parents in the most horrific way. He seemed to be doing well now. Kids were resilient, she knew that better than anyone.
“You want cheese or pepperoni?” Alex asked the boy.
“Queso.”
“Oh, before I forget,” she said while serving a slice of pizza, “the piano lady confirmed the class for tomorrow.”
“Mañana?” Antonio didn’t seem very excited at the prospect.
“Liv, you used to play the piano when you were a kid, right? You still play?”
“Nah, I don’t think so. I stopped around 11, I guess? I used to love it though.”
“Hace mucho,” Antonio commented, mouth full of pizza.
“Antonio!” Alex scolded him but Olivia could see she wanted to laugh.
“He’s right, it’s been a long time. Alex told me you’re learning to play the piano. Do you like it?”
Antonio just shrugged.
“He’s still deciding, right Antonio?”
“Yeah,” he agreed.
Alex turned to Olivia before continuing, “Why’d you stop?”
“I don’t really remember. Probably nothing to do with me. Mom used to put me in all sorts of extra activities and then drop them just because.”
“That doesn’t sound like fun.”
“I didn’t care most of the time but I do remember being a little upset about the piano.” Most of her childhood stories were not exactly fun and she usually tried to brush them off. It wasn’t something she loved talking about.
“I like piano,” Antonio said suddenly.
“Oh,” Alex looked at him mildly amused, “so you’ve decided?”
“Yes,” he answered simply before digging into his pizza again.
Alex grinned at Olivia and she smiled back.
“Ok, then.”
___________________________________________________________________
A couple of days later Alex had stopped by at the precinct one more time to discuss a different case. She then proceeded to invite Olivia for an outing with Antonio.
“I don’t think he likes me much, Alex”
“He doesn’t know you and he’s shy.”
“I don’t know, ‘Lex,” it wasn’t like Olivia didn’t want to go out with them. Truthfully, she was still surprised that Alex would like to include her in these kinds of things. Still, she couldn’t help but feel she’d be intruding in their little family, “I don’t wanna make him uncomfortable.”
“Don’t listen to her, Cabot,” Elliot said. They both looked out surprised to see him there. They hadn't even noticed he was listening, “she says the same thing about my kids and they all adore her.”
“Wasn’t planning on listening at all,” Alex said while getting up. She got her bag and folders and then, pointing a finger at Olivia, finished, “zoo, Saturday, 2pm. It 's a date.”
She left before Olivia had time to recover.
"It 's a date?” Elliot repeated.
“Shut up, Stabler.”
---
“I still don’t think this is my place.”
They had spent the entire afternoon at the zoo. Antonio was having the time of his life. Animals were apparently a big hit with 9 years old.
“And I still think you’re wrong.”
If she was honest, she didn’t even know why she felt the way she did. Antonio had warmed up to her during their afternoon together. Alex seemed very keen on having her around, even calling whatever was happening a date. She couldn’t count how many times she had wished this scenery before. Again, her own insecurities were speaking louder. Just like when they first met and she couldn’t find a way to ask the blonde out.
Antonio came in running before she could explore more on the topic. He had been busy looking at a giant snake for the last ten minutes.
“Alex, can we get palomita now?”
“Yeah. Do you want popcorn, Liv?”
“No, I’m fine.”
Alex dug into her purse and took out a five dollar bill.
“Here,” she gave the money to Antonio, “you get it.”
They saw him running over to the popcorn vendor and waiting in line for his turn.
“Did you like the snakes?”
“I hated the snakes but I loved the company. Seriously, Alex. Today was amazing.”
“You didn’t seem very comfortable.”
“I know but - that’s nothing to do with you or Antonio. It’s me. As much as I love this, I can’t help but feel like I’m intruding.”
“You are,” Alex said. She took both of Olivia’s hands into hers. Looking into her eyes she continued, “because I’m asking you to.”
___________________________________________________________________
They were back at the apartment because an entire afternoon together didn’t seem enough and she gladly accepted Alex’s invitation to have dinner again.
“What is this, Alex?”
They had played board games with Antonio, eaten dinner and watched a movie until the little boy had fallen asleep on the couch.
“I don’t know, Liv. What does it seem to you?”
She had her hands in Antonio’s curly hair, caressing him while he slept soundly. When Olivia didn’t answer she continued.
“You always told me you wanted a family.”
“I know.”
“Here we are.”
___________________________________________________________________
Alex would share all of Antonio’s milestones with Olivia and she loved listening to it. She’d even ask for her opinion. Olivia didn’t think she had enough knowledge to help out but she could see that Alex was having a hard time and she’d do anything to help.
“I finally decided on a school for Antonio.”
Alex was at the precinct again. She was in a hurry to go back to court but made sure to stop at Olivia’s desk to share Antonio’s latest news.”
“The bilingual one?”
“Exactly. He visited last week, loved it. You should have seen his face,” her face would glow up every time she’d talk about the boy, “and - ugh I have to go. I’ll call you later to tell you everything.”
“Olivia?” Elliot called her from his desk a couple of minutes after Alex had left.
“Yes?”
“What are you waiting for?”
“What are you talking about?”
“You and Alex.I mean, you, Alex and Antonio.”
“Wha -”
“She was hiding for three years. You were moping for the same amount of time. Plus, kids grow fast, Liv. What I’m saying is, you don’t wanna miss more than you already have.”
“El…”
“Don’t act dumb, Liv.”
She knew exactly what he meant. It just seemed so out of reach for her. A family. A real family. She’d love that.
---
Soon her visits to Alex and Antonio’s apartment became more frequent. She caught herself going over for dinner two, three times a week.
“Alright, homework.”
Olivia loved to see Alex acting like a mother. Her hands on her hips, messy hair trying to shake Antonio’s attention away from the television.
“I don’t have homework today,” he answered, eyes glued to the cartoon on the screen.
“You have homework everyday,” she looked around for his backpack, “let me see your notebook.”
“¿para que?”
“Because I'm telling you to, Antonio.”
Alex didn't scream but the frustration was clearly in her voice. Antonio signed dramatically before going to his room to get his notebook.
“You think I’m too harsh,” Alex had caught Olivia staring at their interaction and instantly assumed she was failing as a mother. It wasn’t the first time.
“I’m not thinking about anything,” Olivia tried to reassure her.
“Yes, you are. Am I too harsh? I don’t know what I’m doing. Who the hell allowed me to be a mother.” She signed, sitting beside the detective on the couch.
“A judge. A lot of social workers. You’re doing fine, ‘Lex. You’re doing amazing.”
“He’s cranky all the time now.”
“He’s in a new school, it’s normal.”
“I just want him to be happy.”
“He is.”
Alex finally looked at her. Her face was still full of worry about not being the perfect mother Antonio needed. Olivia reached her hands over to the blonde’s. They stayed like that, sitting next to each other holding hands, old cartoons playing in the background until Antonio’s voice broke the spell.
“Alex! The science project is for tomorrow!”
___________________________________________________________________
Another Saturday came in and Olivia was once again in the company of her new favorite family. After eating, Antonio had gone back to his room to enjoy his last hour of video games. Alex served their third glass of wine and Olivia was already feeling all sorts of warm and fuzzy.
“I didn’t know you were into Romeo Santos.”
Alex had turned on her audio system and the latin rhythm had started playing.
“Antonio likes it,” Alex shrugged. Grabbing her wine glass she sat down next to Olivia on the sofa. They were almost touching even though Alex’s sofa was ridiculously large.
“Can you dance?”
Alex laughed, “God, no.”
“I can teach you,” she was drunk and suddenly it seemed like a good time to flirt.
“You can dance bachata?” Alex challenged.
“Don’t act so surprised. Elliot paid for some classes on my birthday last year.”
“Why?” Alex asked curiously.
“He said I was sad - thought I could socialize and meet new people,” she tried to mimic Elliot’s patronizing ways.
“Did you?” Alex asked more seriously, “meet new people,” she added.
“No.” She answered simply.
It was true. She had not been open to it. She was moping alright but that didn’t mean she was going to agree with Elliot’s little plan for her. She was too proud for that. She did however learn a couple of bachata steps.
Ten minutes later they were holding each other in the middle of Alex’s new living room. Romeo Santos playing in the background, wine running wild in their systems.They weren’t good but Olivia couldn’t remember having a better dance partner. They were so entranced that the detective didn’t even notice when the little boy came back from his room.
“It’s rude to stare, Antonio.” Alex said to the boy who was standing in the corridor staring at them. Her arms were still holding Olivia tightly. The moment she said that, Olivia tried to get free from her grasp but the blonde kept her tight embrace.
“Ustedes no bailan bien,” he said with a lopsided smile on his face.
“We know, kid.” Alex agreed. She then surprised Olivia by kissing her on the cheek, almost touching the detective's lips.
“Ew” They heard Antonio say before he went back to his room.
“What was that?” Olivia asked in shock.
“That was the PG version of what I really want to do.”
“Alex…” Suddenly sober, Olivia’s thoughts came rushing in. What were they doing? What would that mean? She was so scared of losing Alex again.
“Olivia, stop worrying. I really want this. Do you?”
“I -”
“It’s a yes or no question, detective.”
Romeo Santos was playing the most romantic song in the background. Alex’s hands on her backside felt hot on her backside. Their faces were so close they were almost touching. Yes, Olivia was scared but Alex’s stare gave her the courage to do what she’s been wanting since she first saw the blonde counselor.
Olivia was proud to have been the one to initiate their very first kiss. They danced more, cleaned up the kitchen and waited for Antonio to go to sleep before going back to their long awaited make-out session, Romeo Santos still playing softly in the dark living room.
Yo me quedo, mami, yo me quedo
Dame una miradita con deseo
Yo me quedo, ay 'more, yo me quedo
Si tú quieres yo suspendo ese vuelo
___________________________________________________________________
“Are you free Thursday night?”
They were getting coffee at the precinct before Alex had to leave for her office.
“Yeah.”
“Antonio has a play. He’s playing a rat, ” she said matter-of-factly.
“Is that….good?” Olivia didn’t know much about school plays to know if a rat was a good enough part.
“I - I think so?” Apparently, Alex didn’t know either.
“I bet he’ll look cute.”
“Is that something you would like to do?” Alex, who was usually pretty sure of herself, asked cautiously.
“What? Of course! Is it ok with him?”
“Yeah, he asked for you.”
She left and Olivia almost threw her coffee on herself when she heard Elliot speaking behind her.
“So, your kid is playing a rat?”
___________________________________________________________________
“Why are you wearing a vest?” Alex asked Elliot as soon as she saw him sitting at his desk.
She was at the squadroom again a week later. Looking around, Alex searched for Olivia but couldn’t see the brunette anywhere.
“Good afternoon, counselor,” Elliot answered charminly.
“Do you want some advice?”
“Not really.”
“Don’t wear vests.”
He laughed before pointing out to one of the back rooms, “thanks. Your girlfriend is in room five”
___________________________________________________________________
“Did you tell Stabler we are dating?”
“What?”
“Your partner, “ Alex explained. She sounded confused but not exactly upset, “the tall one with an anger problem.”
“I know who Stabler is, Alex.”
“Right,” she sat down at a desk where Olivia was sorting through old folders, “Why would he say you're my girlfriend?”
Olivia didn’t know exactly what Alex was going on about but she had pretty good idea, “he was probably just teasing you.”
They were silent for a moment, the only noise coming from Olivia shivling old paper and folders.
“Would you mind?” Alex finally asked.
“Being your girlfriend?”
“Yeah.”
“Are you asking me to be your girlfriend because Elliot was teasing you?”
“Maybe.”
“I would like that.”
___________________________________________________________________
“So, I’m the reason you’re finally dating the love of your life?”
She had told Elliot what had happened a couple of days later when they were in a stakeout.
“I knew you would think that. I told Alex it would give you too much power. Who are you texting?” She tried to see what he was texting but he hid the phone from her.
“Kathy,” he answered grinning, “you guys are one of our favourite forms of entertainment. We had a bet on how long it would take for you to start dating now that she’s back. I won.”
“What are you going to tell Antonio?”
“That we’re dating. Don’t make that face, Olivia. I’ve explained things to him before. Way before, actually. When he first came to live with me. I wanted him to know what could happen.”
“Did you find someone else during that time?”
“You want to know if I was dating another woman, Liv?” She teased, “not to the point of introducing them to Antonio, no.”
“So, I’m the first one.”
“You are.”
“Maybe that’s why he was so wary of me at first,” she pondered.
“Yeah, but he likes you. I mean, he might be a little jealous now.“
“He has all the right. It was just the two of you for so long.”
“I know. But you don’t know how happy I am that we are now three.”
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babygirlizz · 3 years
Text
izzie’s favorite movies and tv shows of 2020 (aka the worst year ever)
another year, another movie and tv show review. this year has, to put it simply, sucked. 2020 has been so terribly awful that sometimes the only light you can see are the absolute bangers of movies and tv shows that came out this year. with that being said, some of the movies and tv shows didn't come out in 2020. if the are mentioned in this post it is because they either: had a season come out this year, i found them this year, or they became popular this year.
SPOILERS: it may not come as a surprise but just in case you didn't realize, there will be many spoilers ahead, read at your own risk.
tw // death, suicide, drug use, mild adult language. if any of these things might trigger you, i strongly urge you not to read this post.
there is no specific order of these shows and movies, i'm just writing as they come to mind. if you enjoy any of these movies or tv shows, or if you have any suggestions for me, please let me know!
TV SHOWS
1) Santa Clarita Diet
Okay, so I know this show doesn't have anything to do with 2020. But, I found this show in 2020. I put it off for a while, thinking it wasn't my style of a show, but boy was I wrong. I loved this show. Sheila Hammond (Drew Barrymore) is a normal suburban wife and mom. She is a real estate agent with her husband Joel (Timothy Olyphant). She struggles with the fact that she isn't very adventurous. This all changes when she throws up an insane amount at a house showing. She then finds herself craving adventure, and craving human flesh. Yeah, she's a zombie. Not only is this show super hilarious, but it also shows the growth that they have with their characters and their family. I'm also team Abby (Liv Hewson) and Eric (Skyler Gisondo).
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2) Outer Banks
So, I'm from NC. And, watching this show at first bothered me because I can very obviously tell this show isn't actually filmed in the obx, and the geography isn't exact, but once I got past that, I loved it. John B (Chase Stokes) is a teenager that lives in the poor side of the outer banks. He has a friend group called the Pogues which consists of JJ (Rudy Pankow), Pope (Jonathan Daviss), and Kie (Madison Bailey). They absolutely hate the Kooks, which are the rich kids. A while after John B's dad gets lost at sea, presumed dead, the group finds some evidence that may solve the mystery, and make them rich. In the process, John B falls in love with a Kook names Sarah (Madelyn Cline) whose father Ward (Charles Esten) may have a little more to do with the mystery than he let on. Through friendship, murder, and secrets, the gang may just figure out what happened to John B's dad.
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3) Love, Victor
Alright. I loved loved loved Love, Simon. I also really loved the book "Simon vs. the Homosapien Agenda." So, when I heard about this show, I was so excited. Victor (Michael Cimino) is a teenage boy that moved to Creekwood with his family. He meets Felix (Anthony Turpel) who lives in his building. He also meets Mia (Rachel Hilson) and they begin dating. But, he also meets Benji (George Sear). While trying to get used to a new school, new friends, and a new relationship, Victor finds himself questioning his sexuality. With the help of Simon (Nick Robinson) and his friends, Victor finds it in himself to finally come out, and he admits his feelings, for Benji. This is such a good show, but I was so upset when season 1 ended on a cliff-hanger.
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4) The Haunting of Bly Manor
The sequel to The Haunting of Hill House. Now listen, haunting of hill house was an absolute banger. When I saw that Bly came out I nearly died. I was so excited. But, I was alone in my apartment and also a lil bitch. So, I had to wait a week until I was home with my family to watch it. Now, I was so excited to be scared, and there were a few jump scares and ominous moments, but this season was more centered around the story line of Dani Clayton (Victoria Pedretti) and her new life in a foreign country. When seeing an ad for a live in job as an au pair. When she gets there, she meets the two young children she’ll be looking out for and the other workers of the house, including the gardener, Jamie (Amelia Eve). Throughout her stay at Bly she begins to notice weird behaviors from both children and by the end of the series she sacrifices herself for the children. Sadly, this story is being told by Jamie who Dani had fallen in love with during her stay at Bly. Now I was somewhat upset about the lack of horror, but was still very intrigued and drawn in by this series.
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5) Julie and the Phantoms
Alright, at first I was not gonna watch this show. I thought it looked a little too young and childish for me, but everyone was talking about it on twitter so I had to. I. Love. This. Show. This show centers around Julie (Madison Reyes). Julie is a teenage girl who, sadly, lost her mother. The one major thing she shared with her mom, was their love for music. Since her mothers passing, she gave up music. This is until, dead musicians from the 90′s show up in her garage. Luke (Charlie Gillespie), Alex (Owen Joyner), and Reggie (Jeremy Shada) all tragically passed away in the 90′s after eating bad street hotdogs. When Julie finds their CD in her garage, she decides to play it and they come back in ghost form. But, only she can see them. With their help, she finds her confidence to play music again. Also, she has to find away for them to stay because they’re slowly disappearing. 
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6) Derry Girls
Bitch. I love this show. And yeah it didn’t come out in 2020. Shut up. I found this show recently after watching the cast on the holiday special of the Great British Baking Show. I loved the actors so I had to watch the show. This show focuses on Erin (Saoirse-Monica Jackson) a 16 year old girl that lives in Derry, Northern Ireland in the 90′s. Alongside her is her cousin Orla (Louisa Harland), her two friends Clare (Nicola Coughlan) and Michelle (Jamie-Lee O’Donnell), and Michelle’s English cousin James (Dylan Llewellyn). During these years, a lot of people in Ireland struggled, especially because it was during wartime. Even thought this show isn’t focused heavily around the war, it’s amazing to see these teens live a fulfilling life while struggling with the state of their country, and the lack of money that their families have. 
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7) Elite
HA. This show did have a season in 2020 so leave me alone. But bro, I love this show. At first, I didn’t watch it because I thought I could only watch the dubbed version in English, which I hate. I hate dubbed shows they look so weird. But, once I found out I could watch this show in Spanish, I fell in love. But, sadly, theres too damn much to talk about in one little post. It’s crazy. But basically it just follows the lives of teens in high school that are trying to survive. And no, not in the “I’m surviving high school,” sense. No, people be getting murdered. 
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MOVIES (tbh i didn’t find a lot of movies good this year lmk which movies u liked this year and maybe i’ll like them!)
1) All the Bright Places
After the death of her sister, Violet (Elle Fanning) is devastated. She closes herself off, and has her parents get her out of doing school work that involves working with others. But, as time goes on, they realize she may need to start to move on. Violet then meets Finch (Justice Smith) who is enamored by Violet. He suggests they do a project together. While finding and visiting some of the smallest wonders of their state, they begin to fall for each other. While you are focusing on Violet and her mental health, you tend to miss some of the signs that Finch’s mental health isn’t great either, but by the time you do, it could be too late. 
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2) Dangerous Lies
Hmm. This was weird for me. I had only ever seen Camila Mendes in Riverdale, and honestly, not a fan. So, Katie (Camila Mendes) and her husband Adam (Jessie T. Usher) are struggling with money. Katie decides to take a job working for an elderly man, and eventually gets her husband hired there as well. Unfortunately, he dies, but for some odd reason, leaves the house and all of his fortune, to Katie. As they get comfortable in the house, they begin to uncover some very weird and dangerous lies. 
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3) The Devil All the Time
Ok. Iconic. You got so many hot men in this movie. Bill Skarsgård, Sebastian Stan, Tom Holland, Robert Pattinson. C’mon now. That’s crazy. But, this story is so long and in depth that I wouldn’t even know where to begin. This movie is a bit disturbing. It involves murder, sexual assault, killing of animals, and so much more so if that’s an issue for you please do not watch this movie. It was also quite long, but it was still good.
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4) After We Collided
Okay just listen. I was that teenager. I read wattpad stories and was, embarrassingly, addicted to After. This was not a great movie per say, but it was After. This is a sequel to the movie After. This movie centers around Tessa (Josephine Langford) and her recovery after her breakup with Hardin (Hero Fiennes Tiffin). Theres sex, alcohol, bad acting. The whole nine-yards. But c’mon, they’re so cute together.
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5) To All the Boys p.s. I Still Love You
Okay it was a good movie. I enjoyed it. This movie focuses on Lara Jean (Lana Condor) and her boyfriend Peter (Noah Centineo) and their relationship post the first movie. But of course relationships aren’t super steady, and John Ambrose McClaren (Jordan Fisher) shows up. Yeah, John Ambrose, from her letter. They become closer and Lara Jean has to decide who she wants to be with. Spoiler, it’s Peter. BOOOOOOO justice for John Ambrose McClaren, he deserved better. 
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gothxmcitysirens · 3 years
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@fixitmuses
The past week had been a whirlwind for Liv. At the beginning of the week she was just a Jersey girl trying to find a way to break into the LA music scene. And now she was the opening act for Sunset Curve. Very few people knew who she was and now she was on an international tour with one of the hottest bands of the decade.
The show went off without a hitch, they even called her on stage during their set to cover Remembering Sunday. It was incredible, being up on stage with them. Liv had always been more of a solo act, but she had so much fun out there with those boys.
Reggie’s girlfriend suggested they go out to celebrate; to get dinner and drinks. The boys seemed to really like that idea, but Liv was still a little wary, these guys had known eachother for years, she was prepared to feel sort of left out. Like the odd man out. What she hadn’t expected, was to find amazing friends in their manager, Maeve, and Reggie’s girlfriend, Tara. They were both so cool and did their best to include her in conversation. It’s not that the boys hadn’t, they were very welcoming to her as well, but the girls went above and beyond.
She liked the boys just fine, Reggie was sweet and a little slow, Alex was sarcastic and quick witted, Bobby was a man of very few words, but it was oddly comforting, compared to his loud and brash band mates. Luke hadn’t given her the greatest first impression, but he was talented and passionate about music, which was a-okay in her books. Even if he had a habit of sticking his foot in his mouth whenever he was talking to her.
“Liv?” Tara’s voice snapped her back to the conversation at hand. Liv hadn’t even noticed she zoned out.
“Huh?”
“I was just wondering what your story was. Since we’ve all been friends for years and we know eachother’s stories well.” And had been part of those stories.
“Oh... uh... I’m from New Jersey, I’ve wanted to sing for as long as I can remember. I used to beg my parents to get me lessons; guitar, singing, any sort of music lessons. Um, I moved out here as soon as I could, got in my car, and just drove.” There was nothing left for her in New Jersey.
“You look so familiar.. Have we been at the same house party?” Tara asked, hyper focused on placing her face. She’d definitely seen her before, the blonde just couldn’t place it.
“Yeah, remember that mysterious colourful haired girl MGK was dating last summer?” She said carefully, not really wanting to get into that. They had kept things way down low. So low that the press never got a good photo of her face or a name. Liv refused to be known as MGK’s girlfriend; she’d make a name for herself with her music alone.
“THAT WAS YOU! OH MY GOD! I TOLD YOU, REG!” She was so excited, it was sweet. “Sorry, I just, I thought you were Colson’s ex. Or...” Tara trailed off, praying to anyone listening that this wasn’t a sore subject.
“Ex.” Liv confirmed, nodding curtly,  taking a sip of her drink to hide the discomfort on her face. “We’re good though; we’re better as friends.” Or at least sort of friendly lately. She sort of retracted into herself as they moved the conversation along. Her and Colson were sort of a raw subject and she sure as hell didn’t want to talk about it on their night of celebration. She refused to let him ruin her night.
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demigodreading · 3 years
Text
You Weren’t There
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Tumblr Prompt: You Weren’t There
Summary: Established Olivia Benson and Alex Cabot relationship. Touches on what happens when she has to go into witness protection program and how Olivia reacts when she comes back. The tumblr drama prompt was: You weren't there. Overall just a little SVU oneshot.
Characters: Olivia Benson, Alexandra Cabot, Elliot Stabler
Relationships: Established Olivia Benson x Alexandra Cabot. A Cabenson oneshot
Words: 965
Read on AO3
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Olivia remembered that day more than she would like to admit. Every single detail was burned into her brain. The way the bullets sounded in the air. The way Alex collapsed on the sidewalk. The way the blood rushed through Olivia’s fingers. The way Alex’s eyes flickered shut after she whispered I love you. However, what was even more traumatizing to Olivia was the event that happened after. Watching Alex step out of the van breathing and her face full of life. Watching as Alex shrunk away from her when she tried to reach out to her love. Watching the blank look on Alex’s face when she said that she would be going away… and that Olivia wouldn’t be coming with her. This comment had even shocked Elliot. He had assumed that after Alex had stepped out of the van they had been called so Olivia could go with her. The blonde and brunette duo had been together for a little over two years now. Alex had just proposed to Olivia two weeks before and they had started their wedding plans. Olivia had shown off the ring to everyone she knew.
Olivia rolled the ring between her fingers as she remembered the way that she dropped on her knees and begged Alex to take her with. She remembered the tears that rolled down Alex’s face as she got back in the van. Olivia even remembered the last words Alex said before the door closed: Wait for me Olivia Benson.
So Olivia waited. For the first year after “Alex’s death” Olivia still wore the engagement ring every day. It was just a simple silver band but Olivia loved it. Everyone at the precinct thought that Olivia was still grieving but Elliot knew the truth. Olivia was still holding on to her beloved. By the second year, Elliot watched as Olivia slowly stopped wearing the ring. She didn’t mention it but Elliot occasionally watched her rub the spot where her ring was absent-minded. He wanted to support her but he didn’t know-how. So instead he let Olivia face it alone and they each suffered in silence facing their own personal hell.
It was after a particularly hard day that Olivia now laid in the bathtub with the engagement ring rolling through her fingers. Three years had passed and she still didn’t have the heart to get rid of the ring. She was sure Alex had moved on by now but she felt trapped in this dark place that she couldn’t get out of. She didn’t really know who she was anymore. Maybe that is why she decided to go undercover in that prison two weeks ago. She wanted to feel something. Of course, she didn’t expect to endure everything that had happened but at least it had given her something to feel besides empty. She let out one final sigh before putting the ring on the side of the tub and draining the water.
The next morning Olivia tucked the ring away deep in her sock drawer where she always kept it. She grabbed her usual coffee before heading to the precinct for yet another day of feeling empty. However, this day was completely different because as she walked in she came to a complete stop staring at the woman in front of her. In her usual tight pencil skirt with her long blonde hair flowing past her shoulders stood her fiance. When Alex caught Olivia’s eye she smiled which only caused a pit in Olivia’s stomach.
“Liv, I was wondering when you were going to join us today,” Alex grinned.
At the sound of her voice, Olivia dropped her coffee from her hand. As it spilled onto the floor she turned on her heel and rushed out the door. She ran all the way to the corner before she could barely breathe and her body began to shake. Olivia had just begun to calm her breath when she heard heels click behind her. As she looked up Alex was standing in front of her.
“Liv, you know I can’t run in heels,” Alex said breathlessly.
“Why are you even here?” Olivia retorted using the edge of the building to help her up.
“I’m here to work. I’m back. Permanently,” Alex smiled, shaking off Olivia’s bad attitude, “I thought you would be excited to see me.”
“Excited? Alex, you left for three years!” Olivia screamed, tossing up her hands.
Alex jumped away from Olivia and whispered, “I thought you were waiting for me.”
Tears rolled down Olivia’s face as she responded, “I did wait for you, Alex. I waited longer than any rational person ever would have. But I’m done waiting for you, Alex. You weren’t there when I needed you the most. ”
“What are you talking about Olivia?”
“I got assaulted on the job… and the only person who could have ever comforted me was gone. You left me! You purposely chose to not take me with you. All you did was tell me to wait. But what am I even waiting for I’m done Alex.”
“No, Olivia. Please. I still love you,” Alex said, reaching for Olivia’s arm.
Olivia pulled her arm away, “If you really loved me. You would have taken me with you… I am not going to start over like nothing happened, Alex. I’m done.”
With that Olivia placed her hands in her jacket pocket and walked down the street. Tears streamed down her face the further she got away from Alex. She didn’t stop walking until she got all the way back to her apartment. The very first thing she did was open the window of her apartment and threw the ring as far as she could. When it finally clattered onto the pavement Olivia only felt one thing. Free.
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