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#again I dont hate the person mentioned here
starlatte27 · a day ago
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Its ironic that this person blocked me when... I would NEVER want anyone to be attacked over Stolitz.
Did they make this as a response to the people who dislike Stolitz? Because.... most of us never want to directly attack others in the first place. We are just saying our own thoughts on our own blogs with little to no discourse besides maybe a few direct responses. But thats it!! The fandom has ironically been MORE peaceful since episode 5.
Basically what im trying to say that if ANYONE attacked people over a ship with fictional characters then they’re the worst filth on this hellsite.
These fictional characters arent more valuable than the human lives behind the screen. So again, I find it to be very ironic that this person got pissed at me because in reality.... I actually agree with everything this post is saying! 🤦🏾‍♀️
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twatshag · a day ago
"Can I ask you something?"
♤ In which haikyuu boys ask you personal questions ♤
Pairings: iwaizumi x reader, osamu x reader, kuroo x reader All gn!!
Warnings: mentions of death(not the characters), suggestive topics, mentions of daddy issues, mention of past troubles, insecurities, mentions of exs cheating, crying
Genre: fluff, slightly angsty but still fluffy.
A/N: In honour of mental health month I wanted to write this piece to make you guys feel loved by the boys ! You are loved and cared for and as much as I hated hearing it but things WILL get better. Stay strong I want you to fight.- Kira
Miya Osamu
You and your boyfriend were cuddling against one another in your bed it was a routine you both loved doing on your free days. Basking in each others warmth while talking about your days and what the future holds.
Osamu's laugh rang through the bedroom walls while he played with your hair. "And then she literally drops her cake right onto my laptop and it freakin' broke it!!" "Ma god angel was tha cake that hard?" "You have no idea how much I wanted to punch her for one, baking a cake that was literally so hard if I ate a rock it would've been softer and two for breaking my freaking laptop !".
Osamu chuckled once again as he kissed your forehead and you frowning because of how can he find the awful events that you've been dealing with all week funny at all.
"There there angel A don't want ya getting forehead wrinkles from frowning too hard ya know." He chuckled while poking your ticklish sides earning a slap on his hand. "Jeez I think I'd literally cry if I ever got them." Osamu smiled against your hairline as the conversation came to a halt maybe this was the right moment to ask what he's been thinking about all week he thought.
"Angel can a ask you something?". You tilted your head to look at him while he gazed right back at you while popping an eyebrow at his question "is your question going to be 'can ya help me get off?' ? Because your answer is no."
Osamu chuckled and rolled his eyes at your so bold statement just a while back in your relationship you'd be blushing profusely if he made any type of suggestive comment wondering what happened to his innocent S/o.
"Nah angel I'm serious here". Noticing his serious features you decided to nod and see what he has to say.
Gulping he decided to ask away. "What made ya believe in love again? Ya know after yer ex had cheated on ya?" Your eyes widened at his sudden question earning a worried panicked look from him. Looking around the room to avoid this awkward situation he put himself into "Y-ya dont hafta answer ya know A- a Just couldn't-" "you."
His eyes met yours with a dumb founded expression you deciding to continue on since there was no backing down now. I mean you always knew that one day he'd ask you about it but it still made you sink a bit when he did.
"I mean sure of course there would be times where you smelled different or something and I'd panic or times you got so many notifications on your phone and i'd let my past get the better of me and snoop but after 3 months of dating, you told me something that just healed everything I've been through."
You smiled at him and he looked back at you with a curious look to what his so called healing words were.
"You told me you loved me. And I know that sounds so stupid" you laughed heavily releasing the lump in your throat.
"But the way you looked at me was like an unspoken promise to never hurt me like he did." You shrugged smiling at him and burying your face against his chest.
Osamu was dumbfounded by your response sure he knew he might be the reason but confirmation doesnt make the love sick smug grin on his face and the warmth rising to it any less effective.
He held you as tight as he can. "God angel ya really know how to get a man flustered say how bout ya help me get o-" "no" "Angelllllllllllll" you scoffed at him and hit his chest. "Shut up and sleep Miya" to which he laughed at the sound of his last name even when you were upset and you addressed him by his last name he can't help but smile at how beautiful it sounded coming from you. "Yer breaking ma heart here angel don't make me take yer cuddling rights." Chuckling as your grip around him tightened and drifting off to sleep together while he played with your hair.
Making mental note to always be the one who heals you forever because you were the one who healed him too and God did he love you so much for everything that you did.
Iwaizumi Hajime
Today was your regular late night drive throughs and talks about your life while stuffing your face with fast food with your beefy athletic trainer boyfriend.
As you brought the sandwich to your mouth and took a big bite you moaned at the heavenly taste earning a chuckle from the green eyed man next to you.
"Can't believe I'm not the one who's making you moan that way but a sandwich."
You rolled your eyes at his snarky comment while stuffing your mouth with the sandwich "shushth up iwa-chanth".
"Jeez who knew romance was dead L/n and I told you stop calling me that and don't speak with a mouth full last time you did you had to clean my car seat" he laughed earning an intensive glare his way from you.
You swallowed and thought about a good come back for a second. "I wasn't the one who threw up in my cup holder was I? Iwaaa-chaaaannnn" making sure to drag the annoying nickname out just to tease him.
He rolled his eyes at you "you're such a brat, doll and you know how I can't deal with spicy food who's fault was that?" You laughed "oh shut up, you loved me for the after care you got Hajime." "I'll think about it."
Smacking his chest lightly as you both laughed into the night.
Should I ask ? I really don't want to pry. I mean it's been weeks since they've told me about it and I dont want them to feel alone maybe I shouldn't ask them iwaizumi thought to himself while staring at the sandwich in his hands. But before he could decide he was snapped back to reality by your voice "not hungry Haji?" Before he could settle on a decision the words have already come out of his mouth.
"Doll can I ask you something?" You raised an eye brow at his sudden serious tone and you nodded "of course, anything haji-baby" feeling the atmosphere turn tense you decided to pull out the favourite nick name card and he smiled nervously.
"Do you miss her?" You felt your heart sink. Your friend had gotten into an accident talking with her boyfriend while driving resulting them in a critical state which lead to them passing away. You smiled weakly.
"Yes I do.." he stared at you worried that he might've crossed a line or broke a boundary but before he could overthink you opened your mouth to speak again.
"But you know, my care taker always told me something that always stuck to me about death. They said Nobody dies before age" he frowned confusingly. "What do you mean?" He asked eager to know what your statement meant.
"It means that when a person passes away they've served their purpose and they accomplished what they wanted to on earth so they go into their next step. A life even better than what they've gotten." You gazed at him smiling of course it hurt, alot but your friend was very successful and very happy when you went to the funeral and walked up to her casket the way she lied there was a peaceful sight. Slight smile on her face despite her body being cold.
As much as it hurt saying good bye you couldn't help but smile at how happy she looked to earn peace of an even better life in the next. Leaving her pain behind her.
Iwaizumi reached to hold your hand thinking he couldn't possibly be more in love how foolish he thought.
"You're really strong you know that?" You laughed heavily squeezing his hand while a few tears slipped out of your eyes. "Its a part of life you know its just it always hurts when they leave but it makes me at ease knowing that something better is out there for them."
You looked up at your boyfriend who was tearing up in front of you exchanging silent smiles and promises to never be sad when anything happens to you both individually because at the end of the day the light at the end of the tunnel is always brighter than the start.
Kissing in the dead of night as a confirmation to what you both were thinking and agreeing to your promise. While he held you in his arms remembering to always make you feel better because even though his job was draining coming home to you and embracing you was something that always, always made him feel better. Hoping that it would be your cure as well.
Kuroo Tetsuro
"Kitten! Come help me with this!" Kuroo whined as he was trying to hang up the drawn portrait of your pet dog on the wall. Today was just a normal lazy day in the kuroo & L/n household. "Tetsu- stop whining can't you see I'm busy here" you rolled your eyes at your 6'2 pouting boyfriend who's suddenly bad at everything he can do alone knowing damn well he just uses it as an excuse to be close to you.
Despite what everyone thought of Kuroo he sure was the clingy type in fact if you got up to the bathroom during the night he'd whine about how you don't love him anymore because you left his arms.
Walking over to you trying to put the portrait into different frames you had placed on the floor deciding which one would look the best on the wall. He crouched down to your level and hugged you from behind while resting his chin on your shoulder.
"Kitten don't use that sassy tone with me I'm still your senpai chibi-chan." You giggled and rolled your eyes at his silly nickname "you know that it's been 5 years since high school right ?" He smirked at you and kissed your neck earning a whimper from you at the warm sensation. "But you're still my chibi-chan" "whatever you say captain"
you smiled at his warmth while sliding the portrait out of the frame you put it in. "Say chibi-chan, why don't you start calling me captain in bed?" You looked at him with the best deadpan expression you could make while he wiggled his eyebrows at you as a way to say 'whatcha think???' "No". You answered back.
you stood up grabbing the frame you thought fit best on the wall and he followed you like a lost puppy "oooohhh come on chibi-chan, how would that hurt? You refused to call me daddy you know!" You laughed at his annoying smug grin and rolled your eyes at his pouty face.
"I'm not calling you captain testu- besides why isn't testu enough for you? Sex is supposed to be intimate why would I call you something that I don't like thinking about." You chuckled,
but he knew better than anyone that your chuckle wasn't because you thought it was funny but because you were hiding the slight pain in your voice.
If you had anything common with kuroo it was that your home wasn't as perfect either. Your father was indeed home and he lived with you guys but if he wasn't it would've probably been for the better. And he knew about that.
"Kitten can I ask you something?" You rolled your eyes thinking this was going to be another bribe for you to call him some nick name during sexual intercourse but decided to play along. "Aye aye captain ask away." Popping the cardboard open to place the portrait inside the decided frame you heard him swallow and he opened his mouth to talk.
"Is it because of him?" You almost dropped the portrait from your hands. Grip hardening on the piece of paper in your hold.
You looked at him sadness reflecting your eyes trying to hide it behind your weak smile. You nodded. "Yeah. It is".
You didn't notice how your hand started shaking becoming angry and over rushed with every negative emotion in your body tears swelling up your eyes not noticing how your boyfriend was already by your side placing the paper you held so tightly on to the side while pulling you in to his chest and relaxing as you softened against him.
"I'm sorry I shouldn't have asked you that." You sniffles against shaking your head. "No it's okay, it's just.." he placed his hand on your head tracing his thumb against your hair lightly something that always soothed you when your sad.
"I just don't want to remember him, You know and I still feel like it's my fault that he's the way he is, maybe if I-" "no."
Kuroo cut you off by lifting your chin up to look at him worry and pain plastered onto his face. How can anyone hurt you he thought.
"It's not your fault kitten, if anything he's the asshole. You didn't deserve him and his shitty behaviour if I was in his place I would've made sure to protect you even from myself."
You laughed while he wiped your tears and you leaned to his touch "you just made this sound gross testu" he chuckled and pulled you into his chest once again allowing you to hear his racing heart that only raced for you.
"guess I'm gross for making my kitten laugh while crying" you giggled wrapping your arms tightly around him, enjoying his warmth and love for a few seconds before mumbling. "Captain sounds nice.." giggling to yourself and suddenly yelping as he picked you up bridal style and kissing your lips making his way to the bedroom
"Tetsu put me down!!! We still didn't hang the portrait yet!!" He chuckled as you squirmed in his hold "nope I'm sure the portrait could wait right now I have to take this new nickname for a test drive" as he closed the door to the bedroom leaving you and your worries behind.
You knew that at the end of the day kuroo would never hurt you. Unless it's in bed but that's beside the point.. he truly loved you and while you laid in his arms that night completely bare he vowed to himself to always protect you. Even if that meant from himself.
A/N: I hope that you guys enjoyed this piece dedicated to mental health month! Please don't ever doubt your feelings they are valid and you have every right to feel the way you feel thank you all for being the way you guys are ! Much love to everyone! Stay strong
- with love kira
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nightmare-cubed · 4 days ago
the person you just reblogged from is super shitty. (trench///rat) i dont have the energy to type everything out but theyre transphobic anti mogai anti neopronouns calls people the r slur etc etc
Don’t worry, we keep an eye out on who we reblog from! He is trans, though, and talks about transphobia often? I’m not sure where you got that one from.
Also, while he is generally anti-neopronouns and anti-MOGAI, he still respects them if you have them.
We actually follow him. He was nice and respectful to us when we spoke to him, and we don’t like closing ourselves off entirely. We want to be friends with people who disagree with us, as long as they’re willing to speak with us like reasonable people. We don’t want to be stuck in an echo chamber, y’know?
Not to mention, because we can curate who we speak to, who sees our content, et cetera, to a significant degree, tumblr makes a great avenue for exposure. We’re going to have to learn to accept that people won’t agree with us, that people that hate us exist, and that we can’t panic whenever we see a slightest bit of it. If it ever gets to be too much, we can just unfollow.
It’s also just generally important to treat people like people, and not “thing that spouts the bad ideas” — to be able to engage in good faith discussion. We aren’t here to have a perfectly curated no-discourse blog. We often engage with people who post discourse, and not always in agreement with them! If they’re kind to us and listen to what we say, even if they don’t agree in the end?
They’re good in our book.
TR also is autistic, and we made a post a while back about how being able to use a slur doesn’t give one the right to use it against others. We shared it with him, and he shared that he was somewhat desensitized to it. I haven’t seen him use it since, so once again, we think that he’s actually willing to listen.
People and our issues aren’t black and white. Reasonable people can believe the “wrong” things, terrible people can believe the “right” things. I am not the judge of right and wrong, I am not the judge of people and not the judge of issues. Nuance is important, and there’s plenty of it here.
We both have our own opinions, and we don’t agree. But that’s okay. He respects us, he respects our opinions, and he respects people in general even if he doesn’t agree with them. That means a lot to us.
If you don’t want to see posts from him, let us know! We can tag them so you can filter them out.
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vaporwave-trolls · 5 days ago
ok so to address the anons ive been getting here is kind of where it started,please don't reblog this and once again if you know who this is don't go after them,theyre are known for being shitty but i also dont want them swamped with hate either. i dont want drama i just want this to be over with i want them to just forget about me
so the first thing they are referring to is THIS post i made talking about things that bothered me with japanese troll and i was really heated when writting that post
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they would always come to me to talk about other peoples trolls with japanese themes and wanted to constantly get trolls cancelled for having tat sort of influence which they would constantly label as appropriation which im saying right now it is not
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now i got pretty sauced at this point as i have always been open with them about my struggles with being mixed and it effected me pretty bad growing up im Japanese Brazilian and took after my father but i grew up in japan so looking foreign in school was not great i got called a lot of stuff which led to me completly disowning the fact i was japanese till i was 17 pretty much becuse not looking japanese caused me a lot of grief
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and heres where i was probably a little mean but let me explain. before this point i thought of this person as a friend cus it had been 2 years and they hadnt done anything truly bad so i had trusted them with some private information and this is when i found out during these 2 years this person had been already saying shit about me behind my back and telling people no to come to me for anything keep in mind we where friends during that.this person also had a history of taking my struggles and turning it into theirs. i lost my birth parents they're dead,i was fetishized at 15,i struggled with being mixed in a less then accepting country,my family disowned me for being mixed from my Brazilian dad and 9 out of 10 suddenly they had that problem to when never before did they mention it also they lied about a lot of little things to and constantly change theyre race. the small mention of my dad being brazillian and black then suddenly theyre parent was mixed black to??
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im Japanese Brazilian i was adopted at 15ish by family friends who are Spanish which is why i live in Canada i have always been open about this and they knew that . also they say they where born in japan in a town that doesnt even have a maternity ward and they cant speak or understand any japanese in voice chat they never understood me if i said something in japanese and when it comes to them making sentences in my language theres always mistakes and its very poorly written and many times its just base level anime phrases. they also knew my biggest insecurity is my eyes which i have never edited (only my nose if im honest and i stopped doing that in 2017) this is me and this is also the picture they try to use to say i edit but neither of these are edited
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also me liking anime and collecting it means im not japanese to them? i also havent been back to japan since 2016 17 ish and when i have gone after that is was only for a few days to take care of things . they constantly share pictures of me without permission and theyre pictures that have been deleted that they keep, they know i dont have much of my childhood pictures as they have literally seen me crying over how much stuff i left behind.they got to a point where the only time they would talk to me was to talk about japanese things i have never met somone so obsessed with Japanese culture who also claims to be Japanese but cant speak it,they never even cared about out friendship they just liked the fact i was japanese then went up on the defence when i said they where acting sus. they're selfish and childish
im just tired of dealing with them and anons, its been a year and a half and theyre still doing it its an obsession at this point that they wont let go of it. the thing that bothers me the most is that they are literally using my insecurities and struggles against me something i trusted them with
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melaboveall · 7 days ago
Story time. Confession.
l don't like any of you people who tease those acting like you fuck with them when you really dont, especially not being straight up at least that you don't like them and are only nice to them only because deep down you want something from them. I remember one time me and someone use to take pictures together but the vibe has been off like we never knew each other to begin with. Like there were times I would smile and give her a head nod wanting to converse with her, but she acted like she didn’t know me. Maybe deep down it was me, I didn't know so I was like oh well. But since then I always noticed every time I was around attractive pretty girls here she comes out of nowhere tapping me on my shoulder, saying hello to me smiling as she saw me talking to them. I didn’t think too much of that but it was weird so I just smiled back, said hello, and conversed with her again at the point like we never vibed away from each other. Even introduced her to the girls I was talking to. But on a different day she started doing it again, acting like I didn’t exist or she didn’t fuck with me when she saw me again. But again, here she comes again waving at me when she saw me talking to more pretty girls. This time I didn’t acknowlege her because deep down I knew she really didn’t want to say hello to me. Deep down I knew she only tried to act cool with me to get to the pretty looking girls since I knew them so that I can introduce them to her. And I hated that. This time I gave her that look and a uncomfortable “hello” back like I didn’t know her right in front of the girls. She didn’t like it, it embarrassed her, but she never did it again. But I could careless how she felt because I wasn't going to fall for that again. 
A guy who was once mean, rude, assholish to me in school and I knew didn’t like me did the same thing to me too. I just didn’t want to be bothered with him.
Lastly another situation where this person I really liked and bonded with, maybe even considered a friend with didn’t feel the same towards me, and she really only wanted to connect with me because of the group shoots that I was doing. I did notice her demeanor towards me at times where she would be a little aggresive, acting like I annoyed herm or  be harsh to me but calmer and nicer to the  girls she saw me around with which I didn't like, but I didn't think all too much of it. I later found out she would go around telling other people how she really felt about me, but alway wanted to collab. She never told me how she really felt about me because I didn’t ask. I had to find out through someone else. I even found out she said my work was trash, but still wanted to collab. It had nothing to do with business, it had to do with she just wanted to be apart of the pretty gang group. That was it. To fit in with the other pretty girls she sees as well like the other girl I mentioned about this post. I couldn't do that. I take that as disrepect. This time when I broadcasted a new group theme shoot, she wanted to join, I just straight up ignored her and invited other people. She never heard from me again as I didn't want to associate myself with her anymore.
There’s a lot of different ways these things happen, and it IS THAT DEEP. I guess when having to deal and experience these things with these type of people since then I always felt like I was bothering and annoying others around me for taking interest, for just randomly wanting to communicate, always caring what people think of me etc. It's a trauma thing. I don’t need to be around fake people, people who have secret animosity towards me, people who are just plain rude and disrespectful to me only acting like they cool with me because in their minds they want something else, and being nice to me is the only way for them to get it done. IT IS THIS DEEP. Deep down I feel like a lot of people still act this way to me to just to get something. You either fuck with me or you don't.
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alarajrogers · 9 days ago
It’s lesbian visibility day? Great! I’ve just been thinking about lesbians. My very own lesbians, that I made up.
Lately (past two years) I have been writing a lot of lesbians. Or wlw anyway (I’m bi myself). Basically for my own purposes I’m going to make a list of lesbians, and how likely I am to expand or finish their story:
The Earth and the Moon Are Lesbians: This stands on its own. Not expanding it.
The Evil Overlady and her Evil Queen: My contribution to a thread; it is unlikely, but not impossible, that I may turn this into a story.
The Broken World: I have been planning this since like 2016. It will be a thing. Eventually.
Driving Across America: This was originally a worldbuilding exercise, based on a line from the song “Ozar Midrashim” by Information Society (”In the distance, I can see a huge holographic Ronald McDonald between the grain elevators and the trees”), but somehow lesbians got into it. I intend to write it as a story or book sometime.
The Swan Wife: Part of the 52 Project (that I’m going to fucking finish, somehow). Based on the fairy tale, but included a cat, and lesbians. Is actually a complete and full story that is done!
Storm (Inktober 2020): Inspired by the song “Fear for the Storm” from Starship Iris, but the Iris here ended up drawing on a different mythos.
Rose (Writeober 2020): Quite some time ago I had an idea about magical girls who are now adults returning to the place where they grew up and fought their battles, and the evil they fought rising again. Due to my obsession with The Locked Tomb series by Tamsyn Muir, two of the magical girls became lesbians who used to passionately hate each other in the old days but now they’re married.
Guardian/Potion (Writeober 2020): Based on the prompt that the witch is taking first born children in order to get them away from parents who give away their kids for material gain. Then the witch turned out to have a wife.
Ancient (Inktober 2019): I know it’s not what Dolly Parton intended, but in my head, Jolene is a succubus, not a human woman. What if she relented and gave the singer back her man, because she saw something in the singer that attracted her? Not as a succubus but as a woman? This one’s also complete.
Honorable mention for Buddy (Inktober 2020): I don’t actually know yet if Wanda Joyce and Irin Liath are gonna end up girlfriends. I just know that if I was watching a TV show in which a middle-aged black starship captain who is also a mom, from Earth, got flung through a wormhole into a region of space where everyone looks human except they are all either blue or brown, and the only “white” person is an albino scientist of questionable morality who decides to be Joyce’s protector and best friend because Joyce saved her life, I would absolutely be shipping the hell out of that. (Any noticeable similarities to Farscape are absolutely intentional, thank you.) So do I not ship it just because I’m the creator of the canon? I dont know yet. (If I decide I’m shipping it, then Wanda’s bi, because I am a bisexual who is mysteriously not writing any bi rep for reasons beyond my personal comprehension, and in fiction I really don’t like “I was married to a guy and had kids with him but I was really a lesbian all along and I’m not attracted to men.” Yes, it happens in the real world but this is my fictional world and there can be bisexual women in it.) I mean, the main character in “Ancient” is bi because it’s a big part of the plot that she was deeply in love with a man, but you’d think a bi woman would have more bi women in her stuff.
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shauta · 11 days ago
thots on realxtime
quick notes:
+jin’s gun appears again -thotser is here +everybody still hates thotser +punching kong +Hell’s Energy has Destroyed the World. +/-Deadwife Manpain -raiden and naki don’t transform +Heaven or Hell... It doesn’t matter.
so i think realxtime is pretty good for the most part. yua actually does shit for the most part and is at least active in progressing part of the plot (more than in show, imo), fuwa is there and uses rampage vulcan which is always good, hellrising hopper at least looks good for how edgy it is, and es is an alright villain, which really isnt that high of a bar to pass for zero-one, but is worth mentioning
the plot revolves around es trying to bring paradise through ending the world, which sounds dumb, but theres a twist where the people he kills are actually the ones chosen to be saved in a virtual world he created for his fiancee after she died from nanomachines injected into her during the daybreak incident. its kind of dumb but i prefer it over like, him just trying to bring her back to life like every normal villain who has a dead loved one. the key moment of hellrising hopper is aruto using the key because he feels he has no other choice to save everyone, being told that it will kill him if he decides to use it, and then he goes sicko mode on es because it ends up possessing him, until izu comes and stops him
which brings me to what i think drags the movie down a bit, and its the last couple of episodes of the series. not about aruto becoming ark-one (which i dont like, but doesnt really affect this movie for me), but about izu dying and then aruto making a new izu at the end of the final episode, which is kind of fucked. i personally dont think izu needed to die at all, but if shes going to die, i think making a new copy of her is like, kind of makes her death a bit pointless, but realxtime really just says “fuck it” and downloads the old izu’s memories and stuff from zea into the new izu. whats the fucking point of her dying if she just comes back anyway. its not even a situation where the old data fades away after the fight against lucifer, the old izu is just back now. i feel like they shouldnt have made a new izu at the end of the finale, and then have izu come back through miracles or w/e to help aruto stop lucifer, and then disappear at the end like with jin in kyoryu vs gobus... or, you know. just not kill izu at all. but whatever
i think realxtime is enjoyable if you liked zero-one at any point in time and did remind me a bit of why i even enjoyed zero-one in the first place. goodbye
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melancholy-pal · 12 days ago
I keep self-sabotaging my friendships. Why?
1st: my goal of this post is to have an idea where this behavior is stemming from so i can research and get help.
The situation: I’ve known my best friends separately for about 6 years. And we really didn’t have many issues. We met occasionally.. like weekly or 2 times a week.
And last year i had to move cities. So i decided to introduce them to each other. And i did. And they got on well.
I was fine with it, but i kept on thinking that im getting left behind which wasn’t the case (you’ll see why in a bit.) But I really struggled. So i threw a fuss about it and decided to cut them off by blocking them from everything. They tried to reach from different numbers to check up on me. And it lasted few nights then i came back. We talked then we moved on.
Things were great for few months or so.. then again.. i decided to cut them off because I was feeling bad about something related to them being closer of friends. I’m pretty sure this time i was convinced I’m gonna be successful at cutting them off. They really really care about me still. But i blocked them after saying some awful shit to them.
A week later.. things calmed down in my mind and started to realize how insane and childish i was.
Because i know for a fact that this friendship is something i do care about.
Its only these few short moments (before blocking) that i snap and decide to cut them off.. i kinda don’t see them as them i only see a distorted image of them.
So once i calmed down, i reached back. Apologized again.. they told me to stop doing that.. and to talk about what im feeling instead of blocking them.
And i was ashamed but i made a promise to myself and them to actually try to be a better friend and better person. So i went on researching, trying to find a therapist. I don’t live in the west and the options are extremely limited here.
My only option was online therapy (BetterHelp) but i also remember trying it before and them being scummy and unreliable.
Soo... after few months or so .. i went at it again. I decided to cut them off because whenever they mentioned each other in a conversation with me (in a completely normal way friends talk) i feel a little shitty about myself for some reason
.. and did the same bullshit. I cringe as im typing right now. I blocked them. And this time took a month.. i know it will hurt. And i was (thought i was) ready for it.
I was 100% sure its over. And the month was incredibly painful. I felt lonely. I felt doomed. I felt like i lost the best caring people iv ever known.
And .. well.. i contacted one of them few days ago. told him my thought process when i made that decision.. and it’s basically that i felt hateful towards them. I felt like an awful friend for not being able to cope with the fact that my friends are now friends.
I literally wished he could punch me on the face so I don’t die from my shame and embarrassment. But he kept texting and saying how this should stop. And he was worried for weeks after what i did and even thought he should drive to the city i live in now to checkup on me but he didn’t know my address.
I have no doubt my two only friends love me.. and I really feel bad for putting them through this shit. I hated the fact that i was abusive and emotionally draining.. and shitty.
And i am not sure if what i did (and how many times i did it) stems from something deeper. (This is by no means me trying to not take the blame for my actions, but i figured there might be something broken that needs to be fixed in a fundamental way)
But i need to know if you guys have an idea of the reason of this shit.. is there a name for it that i can read about and find ways of dealing with it?
Because I TRULY TRULY dont wanna repeat that ever again. And I’ve said that the previous time i cut them off, which makes me doubt myself..
I started journaling recently.. and i wrote down our conversation.. and my friend told me if these feelings ever come up, no matter how shameful you feel, you should tell me so we can rationalize it together.
So reddit help .. what should research to learn more and prevent this happening again.
And where do i find international therapy option that isn’t better-help
submitted by /u/CCaC_Ukp [link] [comments] from Mental Health
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ollypopp · 12 days ago
thank u for speaking up on the rd situation! so many rd manic fans are going around on this site telling creators who get sent hate to ‘ignore and delete’ yet in the same breath cry about how nd had to leave because of anon hate? and now there’s a new theory going that creators are sending anon hate to themselves to stir stuff up as if it’s so unimaginable that these manic fans of this smut fanfic cant spread hate to others.
I mean without opening up this can of worms again I’m gonna say like most creators have: I don’t actually give a shit if you like it. I have thousand things going on in my life and anyone’s fanfic preferences really don’t register on my radar.
It’s fanfiction, we write fanfiction for free on this app that low key should have died out like forever ago. I’m not trying to downplay anyone’s creations but like I just want people to have some perspective lmao. But it does take a lot of courage to share your writing, fanfic or not and we are all here to have fun and share our work or enjoy others work.
Why is it always brought up that nd had to leave because of anon hate but not that countless others also have deleted, been harassed on multiple platforms and should just what? Sit there and be the bigger person? Why? I don’t want anyone of them to be harassed not nd and not any of my friends who literally just want to write their stories and have a good time talking Star Wars.
Also, I really doubt these authors send themselves hate tbh. Mostly because we don’t actually get shit from these anons. It doesn’t boost engagement, we lose followers more often than gain them just for simply mentioning that fic without praising it to the high heavens. it doesn’t do anything but make you tired so like why would they?
TLDR; we just want to have fun and people making the space hostile dont get to just shit all over everyone and not expect backlash. That’s not how the world works. Take the “Delete and ignore” bullshit elsewhere we aren’t fucking doormats we are people
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id0ntexistt · 13 days ago
(TW: mention of sexual assault//death)
All the memories are coming back.
I feel disgusting.
The fact I’m in the same school as you and in the same fucking class makes me feel horrible.
Why did you do this.
You knew I was uncomfortable.
It’s been a fucking year and I’m still not okay.
Cops even came into it and ofc you said “no I didn’t do it I asked”
I hate every little thing about you.
I feel disgusted.
Don’t you dare ever come into my life again.
Why. Just why. I was always so supportive and here for you but the time I was going through a huge depressive episode and canceled on you, you say the truth. Well. One of the many.
“I was testing you”
What test- what.
I have no answers.
All you left me with was “remember and always think about this my life was a lie”
I still think about it.
Also remember the death threats you gave me on a daily bases and got me thinking that’s normal for a friendship??
your voice rings in my head, I can still feel your hands.
I hate your name.
I hate you.
I hate the way you act.
I hate who you are as a person.
I’m loosing.
I’ve always lost against you.
The trauma you gave me.
Oh yeah remember how you tried to lagit KILL ME
And you blamed it on your “demons”
God damn I fucking hate you with everything I have, not hate DESPISE my god.
I hate the fact I had a crush on you during all this time. I really don’t know why.
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I don't see Dreamtale as an Undertale AU
I know this title sounds pretty controversial, but before you get angry at me, let me say this first. I'm not saying that I hate the concept and popularity of it, nor am I saying that these facts are right. All of this is my own personal opinion. With that out of the way, here's my first reason.
1. How does Dreamtale connect with Undertale or the multiverse
This sounds like a dumb thing to point out since joku explained how it works.
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But if you really think about it more, Nim's world was originally not from the undertale multiverse, meaning that it basically existed outside of it for a while. Again, sounds like i'm reading too deep into this. But if you compare dream and nightmare to the other undertale au characters, you can easily tell they don't fit despite looking like a sans. Which leads me to-
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2. They don't fit in with the multiverse or any au
This also sounds dumb cause Underverse adds them into the story. But even then, they rarely do anything to contribute. And i would also like to mention that nightmare used to have gaster blasters before joku removed them to make them not a sans.
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3. No mentions of Undertale characters
Joku basically said that none of the undertale cast would be in dreamtale. But wouldn't that mean it's not an undertale au? Granted you could make an Undertale au character like ink, but he's more meant to represent both the fandom and came from an unfinished au. However, what joku is doing is basically just making dream and nightmare the only characters and claiming it's an undertale au.
That's all i have to say since I don't want to cause drama with Jokublog, not after what they did on their last blog. But remember, all of this is just my opinion.
Where I got most of my sources: Also the art isn't mine
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technowoah · 18 days ago
Hi! This is my first time doing a request for a prompt list but can you do prompts 1,34,25 if you can put those in one fanfic, or mini series. Again this is my first time requesting a prompt list thing. If you can’t fit those three in there you can just do 1 of them. If anything I wrote just made sense, sorry if it didn’t. Have a good day!
Rather Be Devisive Then Indecisive...
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Thanks for the request! I decided to do Techno cause I need some Techno content here!
Sorry it took so long 😭
C! Techno x gen neutral! Reader (platonic)
1) "I fucking hate you" "please dont say that"
34) "one more chance please?" "You're being greedy"
25) "You're right. You are useless"
⚠︎ swearing, indecisive reader, angst, angst, mentions of weapons, mentions of death, mentions of tnt & explosions, Wilbur's last canon life, sad techno, I didn't proofread, this story is so fucking long-
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"Dont you see history repeating itself?!"
You found yourself in a huge predicament right now while standing by Technoblade's side, adorned in netherite armor and weapons. You were facing against the people you used once to love, the people you eere supposed to kill. You hadn't seen Tommy's face so distraught in quite some time.
Everyone thought you were the traitor, you lost the trust of the people you once sided with and loved. You couldnt stand to see the pain Tommy had in his eyes and the betrayal Tubbo showed. It wasn't true, from what you heard it wasn't true.
You didn't just appear on Technoblade's side one day, it was a tough ride to follow. The beginning of your journey had you looking desperately for a place to be, a home. You were lost in the huge kingdom with huge monuments and different types of people.
Then came L'Manburg. A place where you could be free, at least they sold it like that. You had met Tommy and Tubbo while on the Prime Path and immediately asked about their blue war coats and they immediately introduced you to L'Manburg. You were accepted a while later, meeting the citizens and making connections with all of them.
Then came Manburg and Pogtopia which led you here next to Technoblade as he went on about replacing tyrant with another. You were always on Technoblade's side ever since he joined Pogtopia. All it took was constant literature sessions and talks about politics and you were on board with his ideals and his hate for government.
You were apart of L'Manburg before Pogtopia and Technoblade had changed your mind on government he made you see everything through a different lense and that lense was beautiful and clear. You adapted his ways of thinking quickly and became "one of his personal favorites" as he would say.
Technoblade set off a firework explosion and everyone screamed and scattered, that was the "go" you ended up attacking somone else that wasn't a close friend of yours. You were trying not to attack anyone, this wasnt your style. Yes, Techno had taught you fighting styles and how to become stronger but you didn't want to fight who you considered your family.
You eventually found yourself on a hill looking over the explosions and swords swinging in the gleaming sun. People below were looking in your direction quickly then heading back into battle wondering why there werent any fireworks hot from above, but you couldnt do it. You just couldn't bring yourself to soot the crossbow that was hanging on your hip. Techno kept looking up towards you as you looked back towards him in distraught.
Everyone was yelling until Dream had spoken up.
"You know who the trader was Tommy? Tommy the traitor was Wilbur."
No it couldn't be.
"No! Technoblade killed Tubbo and Y/N left us behind, they're the traitors!" Tommy exclaimed in confusion.
Your mind couldn't make up anything at the moment, was Wilbur the real traitor instead of everyone thinking it was you? Everyone was questioning if Dream was right or not, but you were so into your own mind you didn't hear that one faint scream that lead to many others.
The ground started shaking like a earthquake was about to happen and then the ground started to break apart and explode revealing the huge amounts of TNT that was placed under the stone and dirt. You felt uneasy as smoke, and debris flew from the ground and up into the air. You heard screams of agony who were caugh in the explosion, screams of anguish who witnessed the explosion and screams of joy.
Emotions flew through you like blood. This wasnt what was supposed to happen was is? You were a citezen of L'Manburg before a citizen of Pogtopia and this was the worst thing you have ever seen. The sky turned dark and grey, the place you used to call home is gone and the person who destroyed your home was the one who built it.
"Wilbur?!" You screamed as you saw him and Philza staning next to what looked like a man made cave in the hill.
Everyone else followed your line of sight and saw Wilbur standing next to Philza talking to him. Philza had a sword in his hand and what is seemed like arguing with Wilbur as well. Everything seemed so chaotic you didnt know what to focus on, Wilbur and Philza, Dream inevitably sneaking away, or Technoblade's glare at you from a top a building. You couldn't bring yourself to face Techno right now. Technoblade was a source of comfort for you, but at this moment you had no where to turn.
The straw that broke the camel's back was seeing Philza kill Wilbur. He pierced the sword through his heart and as Wilbur's legs couldn't hold himself up anymore Philza hugged his son and fell down to the ground with him hugging him in his last moments as everyone below screamed at Philza.
Your vision became blurry as tears welled up in your eyes. Everything was gone. You had nothing left to go back, no home, no Wilbur. It seemed like Tommy and Tubbo didn't want you back in their lives so it seemed hopeless. Falling to your knees you cradled your face in your hand trying to block out all of the commotion outside.
L'Manburg was like a home you always wanted but never had. They were like family and you grew too attached. You loved them like brothers and a sister. You loved them you grew attached to them as well, especially to Wilbur because you looked up to him as a leader and he took you under his wing when you had no where to go, he cared for you like a big brother. Tommy and Tubbo were also another two you grew too attached to because of Tommy's impulsiveness and Tubbo's attention to detail and caring for others.
After the fall of L'Manburg Technoblade had to make everything worse.
He had looked towards you one last time before getting into position.
"Are you just gonna sit there!? We have a job to do!" Techno said while unsheathing a sword.
"Isn't the job done already?!" You yelled back still sat on the hill.
Techno started to laugh. "Barely!"
He jumped down from the building and into some rubble underneath him and you followed him down the hill. Techno had brung out soul sand and began placing it on the ground with wither skeleton skulls in his hands. You walked over to him and he handed you a skeleton skull, you reluctantly took it out of his hands and you saw him smirk at your compliance.
Tommy began walking towards Techno and you in a fiery rage ready to fight him. He couldn't get straight to him because of a small gap the explosion made. Tommy was trying to keep everyone on that side, safe. Dream and Punz jumped over the gap and joined both you and Techno by the soul sand.
"Stop this right now Techno!"
"You stay over there Tommy!"
The two bickered back and forth until they eventually died down and Technoblade spoke up over the talking and yelling coming from the side Tommy was on.
"Tommy, do you think you're a hero? Is that what this is?" Techno said while letting his guard down for a moment and put his crossbow down.
"I just- I just wanted L'Manburg!" Tommy exclaimed back clearly confused.
You werent a stranger to Technoblade's speeches you were a fan of them really, but not when its against someone you would consider a brother.
Technoblade spoke up over Tommy. "You wanted power.
"I wanted L'Manburg, thats all I ever wanted. I wanted..." Tommy stopped talking for a moment, like he was thinking.
"Tommy you just did a coup! You just did a hostile government takeover and then immediately instilled yourself as president." Techno explained to him in a more serious voice than before.
"And then you gave it to your friend, but that still a tyrant Tommy!"
"But the thing about his world Tommy, is that good things dont happen to heros. Let me tell you a story Tommy. A story of a man called Theseus."
Technoblade had taught you about Greek literature and how they could be compared to people in the kingdom today. He so happened to find correlations between Tommy and Theseus at this moment.
You were still anxiously waiting for Technoblade's long speech to end so you could get this heartbreak over with. The need to cry more never became more apparent until now, the need ro run away and never come back but you wanted to listen.
"His country was endagered and he sent himself forward into enemie lines, he slayed the minotaur and saved his city. You know what they did to him Tommy?!"
"What did they do-"
"They exiled him. He died in disgrace, despised by his people. Thats what happens to heros Tommy." Techno finished his Greek mythology speech.
Tubbo spoke up from behind Tommy. "But he saved everyone!"
"The Greeks knew the score, but if you want to be a hero Tommy that's fine." Technoblade started walking backwards with a wither skulls in each hand.
You had soul sand infront of you and you were waiting till Technoblade set the first wither out into the world. There were wither skulls in the brown grass so you all could quickly put the skulls ontop if the sand. Technoblade thought it was a good idea to have multiple withers flying in L'Manburg at once. You and Techno were probably going to get attacked by the withers too because withers dont know who made them, they just attack.
"Technoblade dont do this! We're so close! Im not the hero! No one's the hero!" Tommy pleaded and that made your heart drop.
"You want to be a hero Tommy?! THEN DIE LIKE ONE!"
There it is. Techno started placing the skeleton heads on the soul sand and you followed suit placing three skulls onto the other. The two withers started to form and grow besides you and Technoblade. You didnt want to do this at all. You could hear the screams from the former Pogtopia and L'Manburg citizens, this wasnt what you wanted. You didn't want Wilbur to die, you didn't want L'Manburg to go, and of course you didnt want your family to die.
Technoblade grabbed your hand and led you to a higher plane, both of you dodging the blows the withers were giving out to anyone in their way. You had made it a top of the building Technoblade was before. You felt like your lungs had no air in them, from the running and and seeing Tommy desperately trying to fight a wither above him, Tubbo shooting arrows next to Quackity and the withers making Wilbur's explosion bigger than it was.
Technoblade started laughing at the destruction and the screams of the people below. You knew Technoblade was a dangerous man, he killed and did it for his own reasons that you didnt argue against. He had told you that he will tell you one day, but this wasnt that day. You didn't want to hear anything from him, you had lost everything.
"I fucking hate you." You breathed out in disbelief at the destruction below.
"Please dont say that." Techno rolled his eyes.
"You're not telling the truth-"
"MY LIFE IS GONE TECHNO! I- My home is gone! Wilbur is gone! Where do I go?!"
"Hou have me! What are you talking about? Did you just blindly follow me?! Newsflash I'm not Wilbur, Im not Schlatt! Im my own person that dosent associate with government so might as well destroy the government physically." Techno looked back out into the chaos.
"This cant be the way!"
"Do you have another plan?!"
"If I did it wouldn't have mattered." You said calming down, but still angry.
"Should've said something sooner." Techno said while walking away from the edge of the building and away from you.
"Again, it wouldn't have mattered." You said as a final statement before he walked away.
You didnt know where he was going nor did you care at this point. You retreated for now and found yourself back in Pogtopia. Going down into the decorated cave and reminiscing on times shared. The moments where Tommy was messing with Wilbur, when Tubbo immediately relaxed when he found himself around Pogtopia and he could be himself, when Techno and you had extremely deep talks in the potato farm.
You ended up going back to your home later that night trying to clear your mind and trying to know where to go next. The next morning your feet had a mind of its own that morning because you ended up at Tommy's house. You had knocked on his door and he swung it opened it with his widened eyes not expecting you to be there. He was bandaged up more than usual, he had scars on his hands and face too. It was a sad sight for you.
"Y/N?! What are you doing here!? I didn't-"
You cut Tommy off by hugging him and trying not to cry at the sight.
"Im so sorry Tommy." You said regretting everything.
"Im sorry I hurt you."
"Hey calm down. I forgive you, but it's gonna be hard ya know?" Tommy explained as you let him go sniffling.
"I understand, you shouldn't feel obligated to forgive me I know its going to be hard to help them grow even though I betrayed them." You slightly laughed and Tommy smiled.
You felt accomplished that day. You hung out with Tommy the whole day, then found Tubbo as well. They both accepted you but slowly but surely were going to forgive you. You hated that they were in pain but they knew you were in pain as well. Later that day you sat down with the both of them and wrote letters to everyone wanting to reconnect again. The two had said they would help deliver the letters while you delivered some too.
The day turned into night and you and Tubbo were currently walking around doing nothing in particular. Tommy had headed home as you promised to visit him tomorrow. You and Tubbo both ended up on the topic of Phil. Silence fell upon you two, you didn't know what to say about that. You didn't know Phil that well, but he seemed regretful. Wilbur's death became a touchy subject between you two. Tubbo then asked you about Technoblade and you had no answer to that either.
Technoblade left without telling you anything at first you didnt care, but now you are slightly regretting having that stupid fight. Days continued to go on and your regret became more apparent each and every day. You had reconnected with former L'Manburg members and asked for forgiveness. It was a slow process but you all became closer in due time.
Technoblade and your relationship grew further apart and you noticed that. You never seen him since the final day of L'Manburg until one day.
You had visited the abandoned and long forgotton Pogtopia once more longing for the days before all Hell broke loose.
"What are you doing here?" You turned your head to see Technoblade standing not too far away from you.
"What are YOU doing here?! Where have you been?" You exclaimed not knowing whether to run to him or stand still.
"Well im used to being left alone. It's not that hard you should try it sometimes."
"Last thing I remember was you walking away."
"Last thing I remember was you yelling at me and telling me that you fucking hated me." Techno said matching your tone.
"I was in a bad place at that moment." You tried to justify your actions when in reality you couldn't.
"Weren't you all!"
"What's that supposed to mean?" You said getting defensive.
"I mean all of you L'Manburgians. You all were going through something. That something was the death of your leader and the inevitable death if your country. You apparently never let go of that side, L'Manburg is still with you somehow." Techno explained to you.
He always read you like an open book. You still never let go of L'Manburg and thats why you went back and left your and Technoblade's relationship behind. Yes that was your fault, but you can try and reconnect, try to build trust again.
"Can't I be with them and you at the same time?" You asked, while your confidence left your body.
"NO! WHAT?! Why would you say that?! Have you been listening to me?!"
"I have! You-"
"No you clearly fucking havent! They are feeding into the very thing they sought to destroy! History is repeating and you going back is only encouraging it! Soon enough the new "L'Manburg" will fall time and time again!" Technoblade yelled clearly fed up with the conversation.
"Technoblade. I wanted to make ammends with you! I wanted to be on your side again!" You pleaded.
"Apparently not because you keep runnning to L'Manburg!"
You were getting desperate, it felt like everything was lost again. Why did you have to chose between anti-government and pro-government. You didnt have to, you just needed your friendship that was torn apart glued back together. The need to rekindle the friendship between you and Technoblade began to exceed everything else and continued to cloud your mind.
"One more chance please?!"
"You're being greedy." Techno taunted.
"Techno listen! I-"
"I am listening." He interrupted you on purpose.
"Seriously I wanted to rekindle our friendship so please just let me do this!" You pleaded.
"That's not going to be happening anytime soon. You know Im usually the one being left, but now that I see you like this I now understand why people leave others." He laughed.
You stayed silent and that gave him the opportunity to speak more.
"Those that have treated me with kindness, I will repay that kindness tenfold. And those that treat me with injustice, that use me, that hunt me down, that hurt my friends. I shall pay that injustice a thousand times over."
Another speech he would use another time. Your gaze was set on the stone ground beneath you. You couldn't face him and you knew he was talking about you. You weren't going to get the happy ending you always dreamt of. You were always aware of falling out of friendships but you never knew that one of your falling friendships would hurt this badly.
"All that time ago, you're right, you were right. You are useless."
"I dont need you anymore." Technoblade continued and ascended up the stairs to leave. He left you alone down in Pogtopia, it was hard.
"I came here to get actual shit done, but it turns out I couldn't." You heard Technoblade mumble upstairs before you were for sure he left.
You were left in the once lively underground community of Pogtopia. It was quiet and still now with the only thing was a small cool whispering of the wind.
You had your family, slowly but surely it was coming together but now everything seemed more broken than ever. Unbeknownst to you everything would get worse.
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melancholy-pal · 18 days ago
Please can I have someone to talk to?
A bit of background on my current situation about a month ago my dad decided to beat me up in February and because I finally called the police after years of him getting away with hurting me and mental, and physical abuse my older brother and sister have turned against me. My older sister and I didn't speak previously because we all lived on the same house and she and her boyfriend always left the house in a state and my mom was recovering from a double mastectomy and needed everything to be clean I spoke up about how they were leaving the place and I received death threats and got called some incredibly nasty names by my sister. And my older brother doesn't talk to me because according to him my autism is an excuse for me to get away with things. It's really sad because my brother has 2 children with autism himself which he loves to drop on me, my mom and little brother whenever he feels like.
I recently received a text apology from my sister ill link it below:
Grace I am fully aware I am possible the last person you want to speak to but I honestly hope your okay. I apologies for being the worst sister ever and not being there for you when you need someone the most. This whole situation is so difficult and I have found it hard myself knowing what to do or say and in most cases it turns out to be the wrong thing. I hate that as a sister we aren't talking and that there is so many issues between us. I truly am sorry for anything I have said to upset you and I hope you can forgive me. I feel so incredible sad that I haven't been able to support you but believe me I will try harder if that's what you want. I hate that our family has isn't the way it should and I really want to rebuild our family because we all need each other grace. I know there are plenty of things that need to be addressed and sorted but fingers crossed we will be able to do that soon. Again I apologies so much for my part in it and how I made you feel. Please let's try to build bridges grace because I mentally and emotionally can't take this anymore xxx
So that's what she sent me last Saturday. She mentioned in later texts that's she'd like to arrange a coffee meet up but never arranged it. I found out from my moms social worker on Wednesday this week that she arranged to meet on Friday but I wasn't even made aware of that so I expressed to my moms social worker that I dont even want to go since I haven't been told myself and it feels like my sister is able to mark me as the devil push me out of the family one minute and then the next click her fingers and im allowed back in its not right. But the social worker said I have to go for my mom and little brother... don't care about what I think or feel.
So Thursday rolls around and I get a text from my sister saying:
Hey grace sorry to do this but gonna have to cancel tomorrow I have the flu not Corona luckily ha ha but don't want to pass it on just my luck to be Ill on my birthday can most likely do next weekend if Ya fancy it? Coffee or a cocktail if Ya down xxx
She has the flu... but today she text my mom saying she's going to the zoo, how convenient her flu disappeared oh so suddenly to allow her to go out. Its just bullshit.
My dad has just sent me a text too im not even going to read it but I'll copy and paste it :
Just want to say sorry for what happened in February and let you know that it was not your fault so don't blame yourself. I know you were in hospital a couple weeks ago and I am sorry that the whole situation has affected you so much. Regardless of what happened I am still here for you and will do what I can to support you. I am staying at Simone's to give you some space as the whole situation in the house was not good. At some point I will need to return especially to support your mom as she is not well and will be back in hospital soon for an operation. Again I am truly sorry and hope you can find the strength within you to forgive and return to the way we both used to get on. You still remain very special to me.
Can someone just help me here please? What am I supposed to do?
submitted by /u/Littlekittyyyy [link] [comments] from Mental Health
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imacomfymess · 20 days ago
"write a letter to min"
the credit of this goes to Min,@burntcilantro
the idea of this (from waht i understand) is to help others express their emotions (both good and bad) through writtinng/typing, generally directed at a certain person. this is my letter, that has been in my google docs since i first saw the letter to min- thing tw: manipulative themes(?), illusion to suicide, homophobia/transphobia
Dear x,
in all honesty, i dont know how i really feel about you. now, i get what you said. i am genuinly sorry about what happend. but you need to unsderstand, that that doesnt excuse what you did.
you were always a bit rough, and 0, whos knoewn you longer, says that as well. i get that you thougfht of it as playfighting, but it actually hurt sometimes. and there were times where you were genrerally...mean.
you body-shamed 0, which was uncalled for. which was a reason whhy you two fought so much. for the first two years, i did my best to stay neutral. i tried to even out my time. but then that third year? that got harder. and here is why.
coming out to you and 0 was probbably one of the hardest things i had to do. while 0 was okay with it, you were not. i can still very clearyly, remember what you said. You said i was crazy, and even suggested i see a therapist. yet, you stuck around. but since i came out to you, you'd make small comments, such as:
"did you schedule an appoinment, yet?"
"you know, you're wrong, right?"
-and so on.
you and 0 got into more heated arguements. and this time, i admit, i began to side with 0. and beacuse of that, i began to become involved in arugements.
you said how i favored them. how i didnt care about you. but i did, and i still do care about you. but, probably not in the healthiest way.
and then we split for a bit. and then, you know what happened. which, again, i am truly sorry that that happened. but, again, it doesnt excuse your behavior.
after that, i tried to include yuo as best as i could.i and 0 reconnected with some old/new friends, during our split. and please, believe me when i say i tried to include you. i tried, i did. and i know, that my attempst werent really succesful, and i am sorry.
and i hate to say it this way, bc i still cant fully belive that you were doing this, but you were kind of painting yourself as the victim. and i admit, that i was unfair to you. and that you had things rough.
but, the things you commented to me got worst.
"i bet youre happy that that happened to me."
"you think that you have it bad? did you hear what i told you about what happened to me?"
"youre so selfish."
"you're such a bad friend."
"i care about you so much, but why dont you care about me?"
"if you cared about me, you could end it and make me happier." or "if you cared about me, you;d actually try and realize, that this whole 'gay' thing is affecting me badly, and try to fix it!"
"things would be so much bettre between me and 0, if you werent here."
"im trying to help you!"
"0 doesnt care, i do."
youre comments began to get to me, and made me believe that evyrthing that was happening to you, and bewtween you and 0, was my fault. and they still get to me.
i have to tell msyelf, that it wasnt all my fault. only partially. but then i remember the things you say, and i begin to doubt.
and thats why i've never told anyone abuot what was happenning. i told my parents how you and 0 were arguing, but i never mentioned anything that you said to me. because i completely believe, that if i told them, or anyone else for that matter, that tehy would agree with you.
you know, i had to write a personal narrative, for my english class. and i chose to write about coming out. and you know what? i lied in it. i changed your reaction, to being fine with who i am. because i know that if i told the truth, that there'd be qeustions. and that i'd have to talk about you. a part of me still feels like im in debt to you, which is why i lied. because then you wouldn't have to be talked with about saying those things. and if you didnt need to be contatced, then i wouldnt have to see you, again.
i am terrified, because my mom is still in touch with yours, and you could come back into my life. and that is not what i need. at least not right now.
we ran into your mom one day. and i was so freaking scared. i was scared that i'd see you walk through the store entrance. i sat there, as my mom and yours talked. i kept my eyes on the door, or the windows, looking for you.
but no matter how scared i am, that yuo might come back into my life- i think of all the ways i could apoligize to you. and so many of them, include the line, "it is my fault."
there is a freaking question mark, next to manipulative themes, in the tigger warnings; because i cant convince my self, that you were being maniupulative, and rather speaking the truth. that i was the fault, and you were the hero.
sincerley, enigma*
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bangtangalicious · 26 days ago
cancelled (2) | myg, jjk
summary: you cheated on your boyfriend, one of the most sought after boys on campus, with the nerd from the back of the lecture hall. now a video has leaked across and everyone is turning against you for hurting such a perfect s/o.
pairing: yoongi x reader ft jungkook
wordcount: 3.7k
genre: smut, yandere!yoongi and nerd!jungkook exyandere!jungkook
established-relationship!au college!au cheating!au
warnings: reader discretion is advised. penetrative sex, unprotected sex, really steamy sex, ring tease (is that a thing), yoongi is a master with his tongue but we knew this, manipulative behavior, yandere behavior, controlling, dirty talk, guilting, mentions of past dubcon activity, illicit filming, mentions of mental illnesses, gaslighting, toxic behavior. this is pretty dark so dont read if it bothers you
twoshot: part 1 | part 2 | masterlist
There are some scents we find comforting. Not necessarily because of the nature of the scent itself, but because of a memory associated with it. For you this scent was Yoongi’s burnt pancakes. They were not good, he knew that and so did you. But your heart would almost burst with joy at the gesture, and you could never quite deny him when he would ask to make you breakfast. The way his kitten like eyes would be full of excitement, eager to please you.
In this case, the scent made you feel guilt. A common theme over the past few days after the entire school had access to a livestream of you cheating on the most loveable, pure and kind guy on campus.
But he was not mad.
Something stirred in you. You wished he was angry, wished that you two would fight it out. At least that would result in a resolve of some sort. You were now simply immersed in a stale mate. Not forgiven, but not accused. Not innocent but not guilty.
You had blocked Jungkook right away, not even entertaining how he would be handling the situation. You had bigger problems.
And those problems manifested into your sweet boyfriend making you pancakes.
“Here you go baby” He handed you a plate. Not an ounce of negativity was seen in his eyes. You felt like you were going insane.
Your phone beeped, another notification. You were not even shocked to see it was just another random person yelling at you for what you had done’ You’d seen it all— death threats, people telling you you were the scum of the earth. Internet hate knew no boundaries. You had lost all your friends. Even your family caught news and did not want to speak with you at the moment. All you had was Yoongi.
“Listen y/n” Yoongi kelt down in front of your seat, placing his hands on your knees affectionately. “I know things are hard right now. If you want, you and I can leave this place. We can leave and go somewhere else where people won’t know about all this.”
Tears escaped the edges of your eyes, “We can’t just leave…No one will hire me, a background check will show up with PornHub on the first search result. I’m ruined.”
“I’ll get the video taken down y/n. Clearly that guy did not have your consent to post it.”
“That isn’t the point” You screamed, grasping his hands firmly as you sobbed, “Everyone knows it happened. They know I was unfaithful. To you. The love of my life. Literally the most perfect angel of a human ever. I’m so horrible I don’t even know why I did it I just…”
Yoongi kissed the tops of your hands. “I know…he manipulated you didn’t he? Guys are the worst. He made you think you wanted it.”
For some reason you were not that mad at Jungkook. Maybe it was because you were too occupied with your own guilt. You did not feel like he coerced you, but telling Yoongi that wouldn’t have really mattered.
“Come on baby. Let’s move somewhere. And let’s get married. I’ll be able to give you what you need. You’ve been such a good girl for holding out so long. We can start over, together, away from all this. There’s nothing else here for us”
The idea was tempting, but your heart clenched thinking you would never see this beautiful campus again. Your friends, your classmates, none of them.
Yoongi reached into his pocket and brought out a small velvet pounch. In it was a dainty little diamond ring, the studs circling in a simple and elegant design. He held the ring to you and you simply gaped at him.
“Baby…You know I love you. I know you love me. So you messed up, who doesn’t? You’re human, and I denied you of what you needed and I am sorry for that. Marry me y/n. Marry me and leave this place with me. Let’s go where no one can ever find us, and be together forever”
You were too young for this. Sure, being in a long-term relationship might not have the same freedoms as being single, but being married was a whole other level of commitment. You knew it would come eventually, but it was still so sudden. But how could you say no? What right did you have to deny the kindness and love of this man after what you did to him? You couldn’t be an even bigger bitch and end your relationship after this could you? It would look so bad. People would think you dumped him because he didn’t want to have sex, which would make you look like a slut and then…
Your mind was dizzy. Yoongi simply chuckled, beginning to kiss the tops of your knees. Inching slowly in the direction of your thighs.
Once his lips were close enough to the hems of your pajama shorts that you were sensitive, you let out a surprised yelp. Yoongi grinned, face still pressed in the inside of your thigh, ring in hand. He wiggled his tongue in a way to push past the cloth, looking up at you briefly with a twinkle in his eye before his hot tongue barely traced your heat.
“Y…yoongi” Your heart rate picked up as Yoongi bit the crotch of your shorts and began to drag it down. It was an erotic sight, and you couldn’t help but feel shivers as you anticipated his next move. Then he did something shocking. He took the diamond ring and placed it flat against your exposed clit, his finger in the circle holding it against you. The cold metal felt amazing. He slowly dragged the ring along your folds, watching as you twitched. He lined the ring up with your entrance and next thing you know he shoved his finger through the ring and into you. You cursed loudly.
“Just say yes. Say you’ll marry me and I’ll give you everything you need baby girl”
He twisted the ring harshly against you causing you to squirm. “F…fuck yes. I’ll marry you. I love you. I love you” You were chanting like it was your mantra. Yoongi grinned and slid this ring onto your finger. He stared momentarily at your hand before returning his gaze to you and capturing your lips in a deep kiss. He kissed you with a hunger you had never quite felt from him before.
“I love you y/n. Now it’s just you and me.” He whispered as he trailed kisses down to your collar, using his skilled tongue and teeth to wiggle off each button, his hands planted on your thighs. He disrobed you, sliding your body to the edge of the chair in order to give him access. You let your legs spread wide. You almost couldn’t believe what was happening.
You had dreamt of this moment for so long. The day you would finally be able to have your boyfriend’s cock buried deep in you. The day where you could curse out his name in pleasure and love him right like he deserved.
Yoongi got up to take off his own clothes. You had never seen him fully naked before, just his chest. You always had an inkling he was big, after feeling him get hard after steamy make-out sessions. Him then politely stepping away to calm down, then cuddling with you affectionately.
His cock popped out, already hard and eager. You couldn’t help but lick your lips at the sight. Yoongi shook his head to try to get his hair out of his eyes, and an evil smirked played his lips. He stroked his cock harshly while looking at you.
“Look at you” He sneered, “My little slut, so eager for me. You needed cock so bad you’d just go anywhere for it isn’t that right hm?” You shook your head.
“Yoongi…I’m yours…I just want you” You tried to spread your legs even wider, the chair beneath you pressing into your back uncomfortably.
Yoongi walked up close so that he was standing inches away from where your legs were splayed out for him. “Show me how sorry you are you whore” He spat. You whimpered, his words hitting too close to home. You blinked back tears as he slowly lowered himself onto you, the rails of the chair almost cutting into your skin, making you wince in pain.
“Yoongi…let’s go to the bed…” You suggested weakly as his kisses found your breasts and he nipped away at you. He shook his head, allowing his face to pummel in the suffocation of your tits.
“Do you deserve the bed?”
“No but…” You looked away, “It’s our first time”
Yoongi paused, his head still rested against the valley of your chest. He got up suddenly and gripped your hips, picking you up off the chair into his arms. Your naked legs wrapped around him, and your wet core could feel his toned stomach. You couldn’t help but grind at the friction. Yoongi kissed you again, gentler now, his lips swallowing you in so that you could feel every ounce of his pure love. He carried you to the bed and slowly released you onto you back.
He stroked himself a few more times before lining himself up with your entrance. You were soaking at this point, your pussy drooling for cock.
“I love you” He said, not looking at you so much as the desperate clenches of your pussy onto nothing.
“I love you too babe” Now he looked at you. A dark gaze had overtaken him. The love in his eyes was absolutely gone, and there seemed to me a strange aura of anger.
“You’re mine y/n. Once this cock goes in, it’s the only cock you’re ever going to get.”
“I know baby”
“I’m going to fuck you. All the time. You and me, just you and me. You’re all mine. All mine to play with”He started to rub his cock in circles against you, “My little girl, sweet little whore all for me to fuck whenever I want to.” He entered you in one thrust, causing you to yelp as the push of the girth against your walls was too sudden for you to adjust.
“Gonna fuck you up so good” He exhaled, funding into you mercileslly, “My wife, my beautiful fucking wife. My little cocksleeve, baby girl ohhhh” You squirmed in frustration as Yoongi came inside you, his hot seed reaching the depths of you and filling you to the brim. “Shit. You felt so good baby, I’m sorry”
You shook your head. You were more than pleased with the experience. “It’s okay baby.”
“I’ll make it up to you” He pulled out and rolled you into his embrace, nuzzling his face into your chest. “I’ll make you cum so many times baby, we have forever to do it. You’re all mine now”
“Yes baby, all yours”
Jungkook bit his nails nervously. He had called up an old hacker friend to help him get into Yoongi’s computer. Something was off. Jungkook would know. Cameras? It had to be Yoongi. It made too much sense, but the question was why. Why would he want the whole school to see someone else fucking his girlfriend?
“Jungkook” His friend, Seokjin, was typing away frantically into a large computer, “Bro this is fucking insane”
“What?” Jungkook rolled his seat up to get a better look at the screen. They now had accessed Yoongi’s servers, and there was all the incoming footage from various cameras all around campus. Under each panel was a small description: Y/n’s biology class, Y/n’s favorite bathroom, etc.
“This guy keeps fucking tabs on his bitch yo. I thought you said they’d been together for a while”
“They have…” Jungkook peered at the footage. “Somehow I don’t think she knows he watches her like this”
“No shit” Seokjin made wild eyes at Jungkook sarcastically and smacked him. Jungkook rolled his eyes.
“I have to tell her. Something is fucked here”
“Look, I don’t know these people, but I have heard about guys sort of isolating their girls so that they become really, like, dependent or something. So that they can take them away and do whatever they want. Pretty fucked.”
Jungkook considered his friends words. “You might be onto something…He could be guilting her into staying with him…” Like an epiphany, the pieces fell together, “Marriage. He’s gonna make her marry him.”
“That’s fucked.”
“Dude shut-up,” Jungkook snapped, his protective instinct now in overdrive. “Give me your keys, I need to tell her. I have to go save her”
“Why?” Seokjin chuckled, “It’s really none of your business. You barely know her too, you guys are nothing but classmates” Jungkook’s heart dropped at the statement.
He shouldn’t care right? He was better now. Was interfering in her life just him becoming obsessive again? Was he reading too much into it?
“Fuck. You’re right. I’m insane” He exhaled, “My first instinct was to hack into her boyfriend’s computer uh, I clearly need to calm down” Seokjin hummed in agreement as he continued to click around on Yoongi’s server.
There were a few moments of silence before something inside Jungkook just ticked. She wasn’t safe. He could just tell. She needed him. He had to find her. “No…no, dude. If there is even a slight chance that she’s in danger I can’t…I can’t let that happen” Seokjin shrugged and tossed him his keys. Jungkook let the key ring twirl on his finger as he quickly dashed out of his apartment.
Yoongi and you had been at it for hours, not being able to get enough of each other’s bodies. You were xausted, laying on the couch butt naked, straddling Yoongi and hugging him tightly. Your skin was sweaty, and so was his. You guys were sticking to one another like glue. The smell of sex was evident throughout the room. You probably would have fallen asleep like that if it weren’t for the sudden phrasing on your door.
“Y/n! Y/n are you in there! It’s Jungkook, please it’s important!” He screamed urgently. Your eyes widened and you looked at Yoongi who simply had a silly grin on his face. He released his hold on you, allowing you to get up
“Um…give me second” You called back, running to your room to find some clothes. Yoongi got dressed as well.
You opened the door and Jungkook popped inside the moment he could fit through the crack.
“I…I need to show you something” Jungkook glanced at Yoongi who was simply grinning with an interested expression. “In my apartment…please…look I know you don’t want to be seen with me, but I promise you I did not film us. I didn’t even want” Yoongi glared at him and he shut his mouth, “Look please, please Y/n you have to believe me. Come over and I’ll show you”
He was gripped your forearms tightly and you wiggled away. “Um…I’m definitely not going to go to your apartment Jungkook” You scoffed, “Just say what you have to say right here”
Jungkook gulped, and Yoongi licked his lips, extremely amused and anticipating the events that were going to follow.
“Can we talk in private?” Jungkook looked deep into your eyes, searching for any small ounce of trust you might have left in him, and ultimately coming up dry.
“No. Just say what you have to say” You said, crossing your arms.
Yoongi paced over to where Y/n was standing and placed a hand on your hip from behind. Jungkook glared at him and he glared right back.
“It was you” Jungkook said dryly, a serious expression causing him to clench his jaw, “You’re a fucking psycho”
Yoongi tilted his head to the side, “Excuse me?”
“You filmed us. She didn’t tell you to pay me to fuck her did she? Hm? No. You, you paid me to fuck her and you filmed it, you live streamed it so that the whole world could see. All so that she wouldn’t have anywhere to turn but to you. You’re a manipulative bastard and a predator and Y/n” Jungkook met your outraged eyes, “You are not safe with this guy. I have proof”
“What the fuck are you saying? Are you high?” You slapped him harshly.
There was a moment of silence as Jungkook touched the side of his face that you hit, looking back up at you bitterly. “I know it sounds crazy. But he literally has cameras following you around everywhere. He watches your every move. He’s sick. Go to his computer and check if you don’t believe me”
“Actually it’s funny you should say that” Yoongi piped in, a charming expression still on display, “The other day I found something really interesting about you Jungkook” He quickly went and grabbed his laptop, opening it up to show them the screen. “You’re calling me a psyco, but you really just want Y/n all to yourself don’t you. You’re the one who’s a creep. I mean,” He scoffed, “I can’t believe you filmed this” He pressed play.
The blood drained from Jungkook’s face. It was a video of you and him. All those years ago. Fucking senselessly, two horny teenagers, all over your house.
Your mouth hung open in shock. You blinked, looking from the screen to Jungkook to try to convince yourself what you were seeing was real.
“You…when did this happen…is that me?” You stuttered, the scenes unfolding in the video overwhelming you. It was definitely your house, and he was definitely moaning your name.
“Y/n…No, I…” Jungkook was at a loss for words. He glared at Yoongi, who was smirking still.
Jungkook grabbed your hair and shoved you up against the window, your chest pressing into the glass. Anyone walking past would be able to see your naked body on display. He let his nose trace from your ear to the back of your neck, inhaling your sweet aroma. You whined his name, trembling as his grip tightened and he pulled your hair back.
“You know how many times I’ve wanted to do this? Hm? You know how bad I’ve wanted to just bend you over and fuck you right when I see you? Years. I’ve wanted this for years. Such a sweet…sweet girl. I knew you’d taste so sweet” He thrusted into you and you moaned his name in pleasure. “Just like that my sweet baby, mmm. Scream for me. Tell me how much you love it” He turned you around and picked up through legs, stopping briefly to remove his glasses.
“Wait…” You panted, your breasts heaving with your deep expirations. “Keep them on”
Jungkook smirked.
“I…I like them…I like you…”
You dropped the the floor in shock. You couldn’t remember any of this, but you did remember feeling some type of way about Jungkook’s glasses. You didn’t even want to know what happened. You needed him to leave. You just wanted Yoongi. Yoongi was simple, kind, and loved you. Jungkook was only making life more and more complicated.
“Get out” You growled at him.
“Y/n…please I know how this looks but you have to believe me”
“He’s clearly obsessed with you. Went to your highschool, followed you to college and didn’t even tell you. He’s probably been stalking you this whole time” Yoongi muttered, clicking his tongue in pity, “Poor guy probably has something wired wrong in his head. I hope you get the help you need Jungkook, really. But I think you better go if Y/n doesn’t want you here” Yoongi politely put his hand on Jungkook’s back to lead him out.
“Y/n! He’s crazy. Yoongi is crazy. He paid me to have sex with you I…” Jungkook held up his wrist, “He gave me this watch! Half a million dollars to do it. See?” You looked to see he was in fact telling the truth, Yoongi’s pricey watch was on his wrist. Yoongi turned to you and gave you a concerned look.
“Oh gosh. I’ve been looking for this, I though I lost it somewhere.” He said innocently, sliding the watch off of Jungkook’s wrist. “Did you steal this Jungkook? Look, my buddy knows a really good therapist, I’ll email you his contact information, please do get some help okay”
“No…” Jungkook struggled violently against Yoongi who was calmly trying to push him out the door, “Y/n…please believe me…I…I don’t even like you okay. I don’t!”
You scoffed, hands open aimlessly as you sat on the floor, still dazed. The tape of you and Jungkook still playing.
Finally Yoongi managed to drag Jungkook out. He was gone for a bit, but you didn’t notice because you were lost in pure shock, trying to desperately search your memory for answers.
When Yoongi came back, he was wearing a pair of glasses. “Hi baby. Are you feeling any better? Poor thing” He knelt down by your side.
“Are those Jungkooks?” You asked. Yoongi nodded, taking the frames off into his hands.
“Yeah. I figured if you like them I may as well take them”
“He just gave you his glasses?”
Yoongi paused.
“I just…took them” Right after he beat in his skull with a baseball bat in the alley behind your apartment.
162 notes · View notes
And here I am again, on the topic of Carlos haters. I'm actually very happy for you for not being around people who wish him to crash or to die, because there are so many out there. And its scary. Especially in F1. In a sport where every single fan knows, how it can end. In a sport where its not that inpossible for a driver to actually loose his life. And still they are out there.
Triggerwarning, don't read if you get emotional easy
I had someone telling me that he wishes for Carlos to die, and that his whole family should see it, and that he should have a long and horrible death, which should cause him a lot of pain because "this is what he deserves".
And this broke me. Because its F1. Because it could happen. And I wouldn't know what do if Carlos would actually loose his life, not to imagine his family... And there are people out there who actually put it into words. Its distrubing, alarming. And it leaves me helpless. What should I with messages like it? How can I stop it?
I got nightmares of any kind of drivers dieing because of stuff like this. Because people throw around words without thinking. Or maybe its my fault? Because I'm too attached to drivers? Maybe their death or those people shouldnt bother me?
If you dont feel like sharing this message (because it might be quite disturbing and I got carried away quite a lot, sorry for that) but still wanna answer me, you can call me "Jamie B." in your post and I will still know that you meant me and this message. I was gonna write you a DM but it feels better to stay anonym in this topic, or people might use this against me.
Trigger warning - the following text and also the ask above contains content that some may find disturbing. Please, read with care.
Seriously, anonym - I'm very glad you sent this message to me, because such things need to be talked about and not get ignored! It's so important to talk about this topic and not just look past it.
Yeah, I know I can call myself really happy to be around people who don't wish Carlos or any other driver any harm. Yes, not everyone of the people I follow/talk to support Carlos to 100%, but at least they all stay respectful and are grown up enough to know that you DON'T say duch things! NEVER EVER! ABOUT NO ONE!
Like I have said before, I really wasn't aware about that there are (still) so many people out there, that say stuff like that and even worse they also really mean the thoughtless things they say serious. Mostly because I block every account that comes past my way and is not respectful towards Carlos.
And like I have also said before, I have never seen such a hate post before, but hearing about the (anonym) message you have got gives me chills the worst possible way. This just can't be true, or?! I actually don't even know where to start here..
First of all, it's okay for me to send me anonym asks or requests for fics, but if you have to say something, if you want to tell someone your opinion then for fuck's sake have the damn balls to not send it anonym! I'm pretty sure most of those hate messages people receive are because of the damn anonymity of the internet. First those people are cowards in my eyes and second they really need to see a therapist for just thinking stuff like that, not even mention it to write them down, take their time to send it to someone and overall mean that also serious!
In what a sick world are we actually living to wish someone's (long, painful) death and also let his/her loved ones/family watch him/her dying!? How sick is that?!
Yes, Carlos had said/done some things in the past he shouldn't have and he could have at least apologized for it, but that still doesn't give you the right to wish him stuff like that! He is still only human, like you and me. No one, really no one deserves this!
And the thought that some people would really cheer in front of their TV, if something should ever happen to Carlos makes me really, really sick. Because like you have already said, anonym - stuff like that can happen so easily and quickly in this sport. Carlos or anyone else could really die out there! They could really lose their lives, for real!
I really want to know (no, I actually don't even want to know) what goes through those people's mind, what they are thinking when they write those words down. I mean, how would they feel, if they would read stuff like that about themselves somewhere on the internet from complete strangers (even worse, you don't even know their identity)? (God, I really hope Carlos won't ever have to read those kind of messages) How would they feel about that? What would those words make to them? Don't they see their loved ones/family in front of their inner eyes how they would react, if you would be the one passing away? Are they really so cold and heartless to not ask themselves those questions before sending those messages? Do they really don't think at all before? What's wrong with these people? Have they never received any love in their lives?
To your ask about what you should do - talk, talk about it! Talk with your family, friends or with me about it (also anonymous, it's totally alright if want to stay anonym in this case). Talking about it helps, believe me.
I can also call myself lucky once again, because I have never received such hate messages before (this will probably change after this post..),but if I would get any, I would publish them. Maybe I wouldn't respond anything, but I would want people to know about it, because it's not okay, it's actually the worst thing ever.
And maybe, but only maybe, those people will change their minds if they will read other people's thoughts on their death treats, maybe they will finally be able to understand that such things are unacceptable, that they finally need to educate themselves properly, grow up and finally start to be good.
But if you don't want to publish those messages or read any of their words anymore, you should better really deactivate anonym asks. It's really for your own good and mental health, because I can tell you are suffering a lot because of it.
And if I have understood you right here (God, I really hope I haven't) and you actually know the person who has told you this, then please stop any contact with that person, if he/she doesn't want to understand why this is the worst thing ever. Stay away from those people who aren't good for you and who obviously aren't happy with their own lives. You don't need them. You don't have to listen to their sick thoughts.
But please, don't search the problem by yourself - it's really not your fault at all. You can support/be a fan of whoever you want and there will always be people who disagree with you - which is actually okay - but what these people are doing is more than just sick. It's not your fault that people are like that, their problems are not on you.
I hope I could help you here a little, anonym - but don't ever forget, if things should become too much, please talk with someone about it or take a step back from social media.
And please, also don't ever forget - don't fight hate with hate!
Stay safe, anonym and enjoy the good things in life ❤️
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strykingback · a month ago
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Ok... Gotta say my Farewell to Vol 8. So If you dont like  what Im about to say best click off now or ignore it.
Ok so you decided to click on it,  Alrighty brace yourself 
This entire Arc was just fucking horrendous. No joke, this entire arc was just garbage entirely, no joke. The way how they made Ironwood into a cartoon villain making him into some albeist joke of people who are diagnosed with ADHD, PTSD, Actual Amputees’, etc. This was meant to be A FUCKING WAR ARC!!!
Which means I expected these few things from this Arc even though I was not watching it.
- Plenty of Character Deaths ranging from Main, Secondary, and Tertiary Characters.
- Stakes at An All New High. 
- Characters being forced to make tough decisions or risks that fail or pay off.
- Uneasy Alliances being forged.
- Tensions between Team RWBY, Ironwoods Group, and Salems. 
Instead We Got: 
- Ironwood being “villainized” even further instead of turning him into a morally-grey villain. 
- Team RWBY “winning” through plot armor and bad writing like the Mary Sues they are. 
- Bumbleby Ship-Baiting... AGAIN. (Seriously. . . fuck off) (No hate to anyone who ships BB but at this point it was seriously getting annoying and tiring)
- Salem Just Getting Merked... NOT ONCE FOLKS. BUT TWICE!!!
- The Hound Getting Merked.....
Seriously no joke, this was such a bullshit, deadbeat volume. No joke it makes me so frustrated to see that this entire Volume was fucked up to no end. Yangs and Rubys argument did not feel like an actual fucking argument. 
What I expect from an argument was four things.
- Calling them Out On Their Actions. 
- Person A and B Debating About their Actions/Decisions which said argument intensifies. 
- Person A or B Starts a fight after saying something that pisses one of them off
-  Fight Between A and B, Totally Optional to have a bystander such as C or D end the Fight. 
Instead we get....a simple Argument that barely intensifies and only has Yang calling Ruby out on her abilities being a leader of a team. We should have Ruby also calling out Yang for sharing the information to Robyn and her “Happy Huntresses.” Which should’ve escalated to the point where Ruby says.  “Well that Gung-Ho Attitude is what caused you to lose your Arm!!” 
or Yang saying: 
“Well If you didn’t decide to...Oh I dont know have our faces pasted on EVERY VIRTUAL BOARD IN ATLAS FOR YOUR SHIT DECISIONS!” 
Not to mention to have Blake ,Weiss, and the Rest of ORNJ just look in awe or shock.... at seeing them argue to the point where they start fighting SERIOUSLY THATS WHAT A FUCKING ARGUMENT IS MEANT TO FEEL LIKE IN A WAR ARC!!!!
Moving on from that... anyways Cinders Past was just so so so SO LAZY.....
No joke her past was so boring it was to the point where I found it just uninteresting at all. Yet that brings up a good point hat I said once and I will say again. “How Come the FNDM praises Women that get beaten and show love to them rather than Men who also get abused like Adam whose EYE WAS BRANDED and MERCURY WHOSE LEGS WERE BROKEN BY THE FEMUR NO LESS.”
No joke for her it was just... a shock collar and she was berated verbally.....You know this actually makes Ellie from Last of Us Part 2 Look Better than Cinders. (Yeah I went there!)
Like if you want to do Twisted Cinderella with some RWBY Vibes.... heres how you do it. 
- Have Cinder be in Awe at the Sight of a Huntsman or Huntress fighting which inspires her to be a Huntress when Reeves finally tells her she can be one. 
- Show that Reeves does care about her and when he falls ill and dies Cinder is berated even more by the twins and the proprietor where she was enslaved. 
- What Finally causes her to snap and kill everyone was when she finds out her “sisters” burned her Academy Approval letter on their mothers order causing her to kill and murder which she is later on arrested and then bailed out by Watts who leads her to Salem. 
Finally SALEM. Oh God how did they fuck up with Salem?! I will admit there was some moments that spooked me. However it was not enough to make me feel nervous for the characters as a whole. 
Like for example I expected her to wipe the floor with Atlas’ forces and just seriously showing destruction and chaos arriving. Instead last season it looked like she was JUST APPROACHING THE CITY. 
Which would have been a “Race Against The Clock/War” Volume since Salem would have begun her destruction of Atlas and even forcing her way into Atlas.... and then suddenly Hazel performs a Heel-Face-Turn that suddenly screams BS because seriously he should’ve had some sort of a better redemption that felt built up, then she gets  BURNED THEN NUKED BY OZPINS MAGICAL CANE OF SUPERPOWERED BULLSHIT. Which Held enough magic to unleash it....which could have been used during the BATTLE OF BEACON. However, I wont complain about it why?
Cause, I think the major reason is because If he were to use it in there he would be revealing Beacon’s Relic Vault as well to Cinder which she can use to open it and take the Relic of Choice. Which I believe was a pragmatic choice because you also have to think of the people who are still trying to escape or evacuating at the moment. 
Now the ultimate disrespectful thing the CRWBY did for their “Design a Grimm” contest was the Sulfur Fish. 
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However what does CRWBY do instead of giving a Full Scene where we see its Forms or attacking other soldiers/people. 
It gets... *Drumroll*
A Cameo sequence...thats it. A Cameo....Wow CRWBY you are shit. Just absolutely shit at writing and even giving the winner of the Design-A-Grimm Contest Winner an actual shot...while you overwork your animators giving Anxiety Disorders or PTSD. Great Show. 
 TL;DR: RWBY Volume 8 was one of the most boring, shittiest, and a snoozefest of a volume with such bad writing that it makes even watching The Last of Us Part II look good! 
If you are planning on dropping RWBY let me offer you an Alternative. 
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Say hello to Meta Runner! A series that I find to be a favorite of mine and one that is actually better than RWBY’s garbage ass bullshit writing. 
To give you a brief synopsis, This series follows Tari a girl who wakes up in Silica City without any memory of what has happened except some brief flashbacks. To which TasCorp the antagonistic corporation seeks to use her for entertainment, while there is a mystery element about a famous gamer gone missing... and its up to Tari and the help of a Resistance force to find out this mystery. 
This series is done by Glitch Studios which many do know them as...drumroll please!  *drumroll*
The Youtubers SMG4! Who is well known for doing GMOD Shitposts! 
Its actually quite relieving to see a series that these two brothers actually want to share with us! They dont want to do it for money or for anything just for the sake of a good story! 
Oh did I forget to mention that Meta Runner is backed by:  Epic Games
AMD Lastly.... and hold onto your butts...
You know you hit it big WHEN THE GOVERNMENT BACKS YOUR SERIES!!! Come On you cant help but smile at that! So far the Third Season is being worked on at the moment but no release date at the moment so it could be sometime this year or next year. 
So if you have any plans on watching that I highly recommend giving it a watch. Anyways 
Fuck RWBY Volume 8. Fuck the Canon. Fuck Everything about RWBY!
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velvethopewrites · a month ago
Ok now I know your lying because that was my exact review that I loved your story but just didn’t agree with your HC that they would have a threesome. You still went on discord and said I was destroying you and asked everyone why you dont get nice reviews. Everything positive you turn negative thats why I asked maybe you should have a note to explain
You’re right I used the wrong type of waste but I’m learning English and can handle when someone tells me Im wrong. Im done with your Fics dont worry your blog makes it obvious you are desprate even though you mock others like when you mocked about the person who wrote ‘whispered yelling’. Keep being angry at the tiny things and beg for feedback and not liking what you get, im done
Anon, just tell me who you are. You are clearly on discord. But afraid to say anything to my face. As for the review you mentioned, I honestly don’t recall ever receiving one like that (that I deleted) that was nice ( again this would be the key word), let alone going on to discord and saying you were destroying me (that seems melodramatic, even for me). I admit I have ranted about rude reviews before, but that is my right. I am allowed to talk about a review that bothered me. Do you not understand this? Do you think just because we write fan fiction that we lose our rights to defend ourselves or  lose the right to talk about them with other writers? 
You clearly have a problem with me. It’s cool. I mean, you’ve clearly fixated on me and my responses to things I don’t even recall. I don’t get what you’re trying to achieve here, exactly. 
“everything positive you turn negative” - um, no, not really, but okay, if you say so. 
My blog makes it obvious I’m desperate? Really? This blog? This blog where I post photos of H/G and coffee and inspirational writing quotes and whatnot? Okay.  Hmm. I was unaware that me being a human and having feelings of self-doubt was a powder keg issue. Bad me. I’ll try to be less human in the future. Although I guess it doesn’t matter because you’ve already said you’re done.
lol whispered, you got me. It was funny, to me. I wasn’t nasty about it and I didn’t even point out who wrote it. So, am I not allowed to even laugh at things now? 
You’re using instances of the past to tear me down in an unfair way, Anon. You see that, right? I don’t know what review you’re talking about, so I can’t even tell you how it made me feel. If it was deleted then it was probably not a nice one. Again, this comes down to you feeling entitled to your anger and your feelings.  Something I am apparently not allowed to have. 
What exactly do you want from me, Anon? For me to beg your forgiveness? For me to stop writing? For me to not be a human being with flaws and/or a personality? What, exactly? I’m sorry my response to you was to stand up for myself and I guess that’s what you really hated the most. 
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dracowars · a month ago
could u write where draco and y/n tells scorpius how they met, their relationship etc etc throughout hogwarts ☹️☹️ and scorpius is just like omg :O and maube y/n can be a hufflepuff so like a super cute slytherpuff relationship ARGH (ofc u dont need to do it 👍🏻 no pressure!! have a great day 🤍)
undying love | draco malfoy
pairing: draco x hufflepuff!reader
word count: 1,5k
summary: where draco and y/n tell scorpius about their love story
a/n: i love family tropes :( thank you for sending this in! <3
warnings: none
universe: harry potter
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“Mommy, look what I found!”, your son calls for you through the house and shortly afterwards you can hear him coming down the stairs at an unbelievable speed, running to you in the kitchen. With a cup of tea and the latest edition of the Daily Prophet, you sit at the dining table and look at Scorpius as he walks towards you with what looks like a photo in his tiny hands.
“Look, look!”, Scorpius says excitedly while placing the moving picture on the table in front of you. A gentle smile forms on your lips as you take a closer look. The magical photo shows Draco, your friends and you at your graduation from Hogwarts so many years ago. You proudly hold your certificates in front of the camera, the traditional graduation hats on your heads, waiting for the enchanted boats, that took you to Hogwarts prior to the start of your very first year, ready to leave Hogwarts forever.
At the sight, beautiful memories of your school days come up inside of you and you have to hold back a sob until you notice that Scorpius’ big, interested puppy eyes are still on you.
“Yes, that is us, Scorpius darling”, you smile at him gently and pull him onto your lap in order to take a closer look at the picture together.
“But Mommy had completely different hair then!”, Scorpius giggles and points at your former self, which is smiling brightly into the camera with Draco’s arm tightly embracing you and pressing you against him. “And the hats look funny!”
“That is true. The photo was taken several years ago. It was when we graduated from Hogwarts. You know, in a few years, you will be going there too. It is a special school for Witchcraft and Wizardry. It is for young magicians, to teach them everything they need for their life in the Wizarding World”, you explain to your son, whose gaze is still fixed on the photo.
“Mommy and Daddy have been a couple for that long?”, Scorpius marvels at your words and averts his gaze as he shifts on your lap to look up at you. Kissing him on the forehead, you smile and nod.
Before you can tell him more about it, however, the slamming of the front door announces that Draco is back home.
“Daddy!”, Scorpius immediately exclaims excitedly and hops down from your lap, takes the photo from the table and rushes to the entrance. Because of Draco’s following laughter coming from the hallway, Scorpius must have happily thrown himself around his father’s neck as he usually does as a welcome.
With Scorpius in his arms, your husband finally walks into the kitchen while Scorpius is babbling incoherently. Not quite sure what it is about, Draco just smiles before greeting you with a tender kiss before putting Scorpius back down on your lap.
“Look, Daddy! Look what I found! That is you!”, your son giggles and hands Draco the photo. A big grin immediately decorates his lips when he looks at the picture and he sits down at the table with you.
“Oh yes, it really is us. But we were still pretty young then”, Draco chuckles and Scorpius fidgets on your lap, wanting to know as much as possible while leaning forward.
“How was it at Hogmarts?”, Scorpius asks innocently and due to the misnomer, you and Draco can’t help but giggle in unison before Draco softly tousles your son’s white hair, which he naturally inherited from his father.
“It was a great time that I would not want to miss for anything in the world. If I had not gone there, I would have never met Mommy”, Draco explains, getting Scorpius’ full attention. “Just wait until you are eleven years old. You will experience incredible adventures that you would not even dare to dream of right now.”
“Eleven?!”, Scorpius huffs out in shock and puts on an offended expression while crossing his arms in front of his body. “That is too long! I want to go there now.”
“I am afraid you will have to wait a little longer, but I am sure that you will become a great wizard someday”, you reassure Scorpius, although you feel a little nervous inside. Yes, you have had wonderful adventures that ultimately made you stronger. Still, most of them were extremely dangerous, and it was not just once that you skipped death.
“Once you are in Hogwarts, you have to make sure to get into Slytherin”, Draco mentions, earning a shocked expression from you.
“No way! Scorpius will definitely be a Hufflepuff. I mean, look at him!”, you deny your husband’s statement and softly squish your son’s cheeks. “It is in his blood.”
“What is a Slinger and Pufflehuff?”, Scorpius asks interested, looking up at both of you.
“There are four different houses at Hogwarts that every student is placed in during the Sorting Ceremony at the beginning of their first year. I was a Slytherin, the best house there is. You will get into Slytherin if you are resourceful, determined and ambitious. Your mother, however, was in Hufflepuff”, Draco explains to Scorpius, a disparaging tone in his voice as he talks about your house. “Only the uncool children who are patient and loyal go there. Totally boring.”
“Draco!”, you utter out indignantly and give him a slap on the upper arm.
“I want to be a Slytherin”, Scorpius decides and while Draco is obviously happy about this statement, you can only shake your head in disbelief. “But if you do not like Mommy’s house, why did you fall in love?”
In response to Scorpius’ straight forward question, even Draco’s words get stuck in his throat and he does not know what to say next.
“Oh exactly, why did you fall in love with me when I was so extremely boring?”, you mock him playfully, raising your eyebrows as you now look at him expectantly.
“In the end, everyone is the same, no matter what family or house you come from. You must know, Scorpius, your mother actually hated me, but she just could not resist me and my charm”, Draco winks at you while telling his lie – well, maybe not all of it is a lie.
“Your father was really obnoxious when he was younger. Always considered himself the most sublime and someone had to teach him otherwise and get him back to the ground. He really did not like that it was a girl from Hufflepuff who taught him a lesson in the end”, you giggle and make Scorpius laugh with your story.
“That is not funny! Everyone laughed at me after you turned me into a weasel!”
“Wow! You can do that?”, Scorpius asks amazed and turns to you while you reach for your wand that lays on the table, nodding.
“And I could do it again anytime”, you threaten your husband and point the tip of your wand at him, but he does not move a bit.
“You would not dare. Unless you want all your books to fly around your head again”, Draco replies, thus awakening the painful memory of when he had bewitched your books and they literally flew around your head.
“Actually, your father always did all of this to impress me. At some point it might have actually worked”, you continue to tell Scorpius about your love story, a love story which is probably not that common.
“If I had not negotiated an armistice back then by taking you to the Yule Ball, then maybe we would not be here today.”
“And if I had not given you another chance, I would probably never have found out what a great person you actually are”, you smile at him lovingly, while Scorpius just sits in front of you with his mouth wide open, listening intently. “Suddenly, Daddy was very friendly and attentive, he bought me gifts every week until I finally showed mercy and returned his love.”
“What are you even talking about? I clearly had to reciprocate your love, not the other way around!”, Draco intervenes immediately, although you both know exactly that what you said is true. He just wants to look cooler in front of his son.
“Mommy and Daddy loved each other very much and that is why I am here”, Scorpius grins, leaving you two speechless yet again, ending your little argument.
“You are right. And I could not have asked for anything better in my life than your mother, Scorpius. Had she not been there a few times, I would have done very stupid things. I am very grateful that we have found each other and that we now also have you in our life. I could not think of anything more beautiful”, Draco admits, and his demeanor is suddenly so loving and gentle, something he was afraid to show back then. Something you taught him to not hide but to show openly.
“Your father and I, we complete each other. We always did”, you reply as you all take a look at the photo again. “I would even say that we are even happier now than we are in this picture.”
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amazingphilza · a month ago
twitchcon :: cc!multiple x reader
fluff , platonic , gender neutral ! some mcyt headcanons if you were to attend twitchcon w them
cc’s included in order: tommyinnit , tubbo , ranboo , wilbur soot , philza , technoblade
cw: kinda lengthy for the minors (i think), not as much for the hags LMAO /hj
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this man is so excited to be at his first twitchcon & being able to hang out with all his best friends makes it a hundred times better
when he isn’t at a panel or doing meet & greets, he’s dragging you everywhere to see the whole convention center (clingyinnit)
he is just so at awe despite this not being his first convention to attend
you’d be surprised he gets tired pretty quickly & stops over to the partner lounge
you both rest for a bit against a wall in a pretty packed hallway despite it being an exclusive area to twitch partners
every time a famous streamer walks by he will yell it out and record it then vlog your reaction, even if they’re surrounded with bodyguards & trying to get to another place quickly
he’d zoom in his camera to their face at a horrible angle and be like
“oh my god it is THE ninja. ninja famous fortnite player, HELLO.”
but he gets completely ignored
then the camera pans out to you, still really zoomed in that the capture is blurry
tommy is so confused, forgetting the bit ninja did on his twitter where he renamed himself ‘ninjainnit’ for a split second
okay tommy isn’t that athletic but he will chase you and the rest of your group down a hallway if he had to
he’d probably find a toy gun from the artist alley/seller booths and shoot you and wilbur with it
but if tommy stumbles across any of the dream team, it’s about to be minecraft manhunt but irl
and he will def play his stream music while walking or smth when he’s bored (or trying to jump dream & sapnap)
oh my god,, now thinking about it he’s probably the one to open like random doors of empty rooms and steal stuff while you film him
like he will take a random empty glass, a bunch of pens, a freebie t-shirt, everything he sees he takes with him and you’re just panic
“tommy we’re literally not supposed to be here, and i’m stuck here filming you. it’s surely a felony in action”
“well, it’s their fault for leaving the doors open! plus this is great content. who’s the dirty crime boy now, HM?”
you’d tell wilbur about this and he’d scold tommy and threaten him with the same pen tommy stole
tommy probably would also drag you some weird event happening outside twitchcon along with tubbo and ranboo
“pokimane is giving out free pizza to everyone if we go to this one restaurant down the street!”
“we are literally gonna get bombarded. have you forgot you’re like three of twitch’s top streamers? i’d rather pay for all of our meals than try getting free pizza from pokimane against all her other fans”
“DEAL! let’s go to five guys then!”
you unfortunately end up paying for all 3 of their meals and picking on their food instead of buying your own
even with all of them making way more money than you, they still happen to be cheapskates
OR tommy will end up getting a burrito from a taco truck, immediately making a mess of himself, then proceed to complain how messy the food is to eat despite knowing what he was getting himself into before even ordering
“shit my clothes are all ruined now!”
“well that’s your fault you got a burrito, as if it’s your first time having one”
“i mean the food is good, i’m not complaining about that but i don’t think it’s that good that it’s worth costing my red and white shirt, im just saying”
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same with tommy, he is so excited
i don’t know why but i imagine him overpacking his suitcase and you making fun of him for it
anyway tubbo has his irl backpack on and streaming EVERYTHING
probably spends a lot of time at a bunch of different booths, checking out all the pointless gadgets he could buy for his stream
you’re the one to stop him from doing so
“okay theoretically speaking, how the hell are you going to even bring it home? which—let me remind you—is across the country for you and not to mention the giant ocean separating america and the uk”
“free ship-pang!!!”
“i hate to break it to you tubbo but there is no way you can get free shipping on a FIVE FOOT PC. it’s nearly as tall as you! what are you even gonna do on it, hack the government???”
the arguments are all lighthearted but eventually you give in and let him splurge over a thousand dollars in different devices he claimed he “needed”
i could honestly see him visiting the beaches in san diego and going for a swim or even renting out a boat to use for a bit :D
also he’d bring benson along with him and taking a bunch of scenic photos with it in them
i have a feeling he’s the type to schedule a spontaneous meet & greet because he was bored & gets in trouble for causing a mob in a certain part of the convention
he’s like “oh god, i did not expect this many of the bois to show up AHAHAH oops”
tubbo would def pull a lilypichu and bring his melodica or ukulele and play themes while following random people/cosplayers
at the end of the day, you’d find his bag just stuffed with crap he either got for free or bought in the convention
“how did you get all that stuff? i was with you all day??? and it’s only the first day of the convention, hello?? it looks like you’ve been collecting as if twitchcon has went on for a week already!”
“HA i have my ways, do not underestimate my powers”
lani would probably tag along for the vacation honestly
like whenever someone comes up to her giving her gifts/asking for pics, you and tubbo would tease her about how famous she is
and i dunno but something about tubbo just gives me this amusement park energy and going to legoland and spending the whole day there since it’s near by and because he can
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he is like a beacon in a sea of people, that’s it .
i honestly just see him causing as much chaos as the other two
ranboo would probably like take someone’s camera whether if they’re streaming or if it’s for the vlog, hold it up high, and point the camera directly above someone’s face
it did not matter how tall you were and if you had platform shoes on, ranboo was a skyscraper next to you
“HAHAH this is how i see you from this height, this is funny”
then he shows you the vid of the recording of him getting like an aerial view of your face
like you see your nose and all your pores and just overall a bad angle to be captured in
i dunno why but i feel like he’d jump scare every person that was cosplaying as his minecraft character from behind for some reason
“ranboo i’m not even remotely dressed as your skin—”
“don’t worry i’m practicing it’s fineee”
“you’re like the height of 2 people combined, i think you will be fine as is. you even intimidated the security at the front”
i feel like if he had his own panel he’d like pull up some undertale song in the middle of it and scare all the people in the crowd
“lore but in real life”
probably would get some matching keepsake with you from artist alley/the booths!
i could imagine like a cute keychain or smth :D
i feel like he’s the type to like randomly volunteer as a participant for those mini events in a booth thinking it would be funny but regrets it the moment he’s on stage
after introductions the presenter is like “okay ranboo, you will be given a random meme prompt above your head you won’t be able to see until after and you will have to make a random face to compliment it!”
and you can just tell by his facial expression he’s just thinking
oh god what have i gotten myself into
what is this game? who came up with this idea?
you’d laugh at him the whole time, even after he’s off the stage and finished with that small fiasco
“that was horrible. never again.”
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wilbur soot
honestly with wilbur it’s slightly more chill
he already experienced twitchcon before so he’s just glad to see his friends again after so long
insists that you explore the convention yourself rather than sticking with him the whole time but you do anyway!
wilbur would probably have like a mini concert and gets you front row seats with the rest of the group
but that doesn’t mean before it that you’re not helping him set up
“y/n please– my amp is so heavy, i can carry it”
“don’t worry! i’m strong” :D
and musically talented or not, he will probably bring you and the rest of his friends up to stage to just vibe and sing a bunch of random acoustic songs
it’s not like some big concert hall stage,, i imagine more like a casual thing w a slightly higher platform from the ground yk?
after spending a long day at the convention he’d also bring everyone across the city to la jolla or smth !
you’d all probably have dinner there and chill, watching the pretty sunset
“this place is really pretty but oh my god im gonna lose my breath hiking up this stupid hill, please slow down”
and wilbur is like ??? because he’s completely fine with his long legs and everything
“just walk faster”
“no, you walk slower”
AHAHAH and for context traversing through la jolla by walking around the town is a bit hard since it’s basically on a bunch of hills (walking up from the beach to a restaurant actually is actually sm work, trust me ive been there)
wilbur honestly doesn’t spend that much time in the actual convention center, he’s probably sightseeing a bit of san diego with you instead
but i could imagine him staying at the tabletop games area playing dnd or smth
“c’mon y/n, come join!”
“uhh i’m not sure, i’m not the best at roleplay and...”
“it’s fine don’t worry!”
he’d pull you in with him and end up enjoying yourself even if it was your first time
and if you’re of age, you’d be wilbur’s +1 at the twitch partner party and make sure mans doesn’t too drunk
if it’s not too late in the night, you two would chill at the beach after the party
it’s just a nice, calming moment after all the loud music mixed with hundreds of conversations at the party
also something about like taking polaroids pictures with wilbur just seems to go hand in hand for me
i’m not sure why but you will be taking lots of pics with wilbur for sure (not necessarily you both in the photo, but of sceneries as well while you’re together!)
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literally a dad on vacation with his children, it doesn’t matter how old you are
need sunscreen? surprisingly has it
want a snack? probably has a small granola bar somewhere in his bag
but same with wilbur, he’s more chill like this isn’t his first time at twitchcon
omg he’d def bring you to the artist alley and just buy a bunch of fanart and stuff tho
“oh wow look phil, someone made a giant poster of the dream smp and shit!”
“holy shit that’s so good what the fuck!”
and he’s like rushing to that artist’s stall to buy a poster or print
idk why but phil seems like the person to know where he’s going all over the convention center
he probably had a copy of the directory map but yk
you just have trouble reading it bc all the signs seem to be misleading to you
nothing really crazy screams out to me of what phil would do at twitchcon besides like go to a few events, spend a bunch of time w his friends, etc
HOWEVER i could see him wasting a lot of his time at the gaming area and testing new games that are currently on the works of being developed
like “woah y/n, this vr game is sick, you should try it out!”
ngl i feel like phil would plan a visit to disneyland for everyone, like he gets the tickets and everything but once you’re at the park it’s free reign, y’all go everywhere with not much of a plan
the minors would try to cheap out phil and pay less than the others even though everyone else fully paid phil back and everything LMAO
ok but if he’s feeling nice, phil will buy everyone cotton candy/pretzels :D
and if you’re not hungry, he’d at least get you a mickey balloon
just in general, best idea phil had for taking everyone to disneyland :D
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surprisingly techno is really calm despite this being like one of his first conventions
but when he finally settles in and gets comfortable, he’s showing the same energy
if you’re playfully yelling, he will yell back
however there’s still those awkward moments that are unavoidable
idk why but something about him makes me think that if you feel tired and want to go back to your hotel room, he’d go with you just to make sure you get there safe
he probably also needs a break from being around everyone else for a moment too LMAO
i could also see him searching far and wide in the artist alley for fanart of himself AHAHAH
walking around with him in the convention consists of someone yelling “BLOOD FOR THE BLOOD GOD” every 5 minutes but you don’t really mind
something about him makes me think he’ll be forced into playing minecraft twitch rivals along with the rest of sbi or smth
and he’s like “oh god, i’m going to be on stage? and people will see my face while i play minecraft?”
“i’m sure it will be fun!”
“i mean i like being competitive and feeding my ego, but i’m not that desperate.. well”
do i imagine techno getting easily tired of being surrounded by a bunch of people and just going back to his hotel room with phil and watching some anime with him? yes
and will you watch even if you have no idea what’s going on? also yes
i feel like after a while of you guys hanging out in techno’s room, the rest of the gang will just slowly join you guys
like eventually everyone is there; you, techno, phil, wilbur, niki, tommy, tubbo, ranboo, etc
and techno is like “wha– where did you guys come from?” because his room is basically packed
and niki could be like “oh we can go if you want!”
then techno just insists that she’s fine “but who let the child get in?” clearly implying tommy’s presence
eventually techno gives in with the company and someone gets a bunch of board games to play from the front desk
lots of yelling and laughing for sure
when it becomes late at night, techno is like half conscious, you’re on your phone, wilbur is staring out the window & enjoying the night view, tommy is passed out on the couch from tiredness, tubbo & ranboo is still wide awake quietly talking, and phil & niki are helping clean up the giant mess
eventually everyone brings themselves to go back to their own room except tommy who won’t budge
you give techno a look and he immediately understands what you were thinking
he rushes to the bathroom to fill up two cups with ice cold water and handed one to you
“on three?”
“okay.. one”
then both of you pour the water on the poor child’s face
he jolts awake and saying a string of curses
“what the fuck techno? y/n too?”
“get out” is the only think techno says that before tommy rushes out with his stuff and you leave right after
a/n: i honestly can’t wait until conventions open up again though,, phil and ranboo were talking about vidcon earlier and omg.
also i kinda want to take in tommy requests but i’m not sure??? it would be both cc! and c! x gn!reader for sure tho. i love writing him to bits but who knows, maybe i’ll only stick to my ideas,, or not. send in a tommy x reader request, might do it, might not, but he’s my fav cc if you can’t tell so! :D (i dunno if i will keep it strictly platonic, but unrequited crushes and stuff are fun to write hehe,,)
edit: let’s hope i fixed all the grammar mistakes LMAO we love writing late at night :) /s /hj
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