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#admin: SMARTHILY
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John: Kiss, marry, kill: Donovan, Anderson, Molly.
Sherlock: Kill Donovan, kill Anderson...
Sherlock:
Sherlock: Marry Molly.
Sherlock: *looks at Molly with intention*
Molly: Yes.
John: *whispers* What the heck just happened?
Lestrade: *whispers back* I...I think they just got engaged.
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Molly: You know, Sherlock, I’m glad that we’re just keeping our anniversary simple this year.
Sherlock: Hahaha, me too! *frantically waves off marching band*
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Molly, to herself: Everything’s going to be fine. It’s just a little crush.
Sherlock: Hello, Molly.
Molly, under her breath: I love you.
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Mycroft: I sleep with a knife under my pillow.
John: I sleep with a gun.
Sherlock: You’re both pathetic.
John: Oh yeah? What do you sleep with?
Sherlock: Molly.
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Molly: *texting Sherlock after the boys had a night out* I don’t care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Sherlock: Alive.
Molly: Not in jail?
Sherlock: *read 3:46 AM*
Molly: SHERLOCK ?!
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Sherlock: I have good news and bad news, which do you want to hear first?
Molly:
Molly: Good.
Sherlock: It is very unlikely that I will ever, EVER, do it again.
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[Valentine's day]
Molly: [reading Sherlock's text] Sherlock just said he's going to give me 131 minutes of pleasure tonight.
Meena: Oh wow.
[later watching Die Hard]
Sherlock: You look disappointed.
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Molly: Are you alright? You didn't sleep at all last night.
Sherlock: I got a solid eight minutes.
Sherlock: Not consecutively but still it's fine. You're not even that blurry.
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Donovan: Welcome to the ‘Fuck Sherlock Holmes’ support group, where we gather to say a collective "fuck you" to that asshole.
Anderson: But first, a few words from our newest member.
Molly: Umm, so I may have misunderstood-
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*watching a singing competition on TV*
Sherlock: I could do that.
Molly: Sing?
Sherlock: Judge people.
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Sherlock (after Sherrinford): OH SO I’M JUST SUPPOSED TO ENJOY GOOD THINGS THAT HAPPEN TO ME?! INSTEAD OF LIVING IN FEAR THAT THEY’LL TURN TO DUST IN MY HANDS?!
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Sherlock: I can't sleep.
Molly: Maybe that's because you slept all day.
Sherlock: It was just a short nap.
Molly: A short nap isn't eight hours long.
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Sherlock: Guys, I need your help.
Mary: Love help?
Lestrade: Legal help?
John: Emotional help?
Molly: Help moving a body?
Everyone else: *looks at Molly*
Molly: ...What?
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In bed
Molly: *I want to be cuddled. Time to press my butt against him.*
(moves to do so)
Molly: *Doesn't seem to be working. Must press on.*
(shifts closer to Sherlock, who's already on the edge of the bed)
Molly: *CUDDLE MEE!!*
Sherlock: You're pushing me off the bed again.
Molly: Quick, grab me for safety.
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Sherlock: On a scale of one to ten, how bad do you think it would be if-
Molly: At least a twenty.
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Meena: Crushes are the worst.
Molly: Yeah. Whenever I’m near someone I have a crush on, I start being clumsy.
Sherlock: You’re always being clumsy.
Molly: Yeah, don’t think about that too hard.
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