"Precisely when the child becomes capable of reciprocity, when he realizes that he, too, must give, the behavior of adults change: they now want to teach the child that he has no rights and is inferior because he lacks knowledge and ability to decide what he should and should not do."
- Sperber, 1974, pp. 99-100
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sometimes i forget that not many people are familiar with adlerian psychology and therefore do not seem to fully (or at all) understand what 'superiority complex' truly means. nothing wrong with not knowing, of course, but it is a bit frustrating when terms like that get thrown around in the media in the most reductive way possible.
anyway. anyone up for a nerdy fun riven meta?
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Finally finished The Courage To Be Disliked. I must confess there were moments of frustration and grappling with the ideas and literally tossing the book away lol. Welp, it really challenged my mind's framework but coming into the last chapters, the pieces finally fell into place.
"The life that ends at the age of twenty and the life that ends at ninety are both complete lives, and lives of happiness." This is my nth self help book since my mom died. Idk, perhaps I'm looking for an affirmation or something about her life, her death, or just human life in general. And this felt like it. Every time people talk about my mom, most of the time, it goes about how untimely it was. And even within my own family, I would constantly hear my brother say "sayang, hindi ko man lang naparamdam kay mama 'to *insert typical milestone*"... I know (and it also awfully pains me tbh) that she died without experiencing a lot of things. She didn't get to see my brother finish law school, didn't get to see me in my Sablay on a stage, didn't get to see another country, didn't get to see us married or have grandchildren, etc. I totally get the guilt and regret, but there's also a strong internal debate that it isn't right to feel that her life went about just like that because she missed some "core memories." I know deep in my heart that she lived earnestly and the people saying "sayang kasi hindi *ganito*, hindi *ganyan*" - we are all wrong. She's the kind of person who actually lived the series of moments of her life (that's why she's such a sunshine even if she's just playing candy crush or watching K-drama) and that is enough. Her life wasn't unfulfilled just because she didn't get to see these milestones set by others and arrived at their expectations.
She danced and her dance ended at fifty-eight. It is a complete, fulfilled life, a life of happiness.
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Do you ever say something to someone that according to your private logic makes perfect 100% sense and then the person you say it to hugs you and says ‘someone hurt you pretty bad, huh?’
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The key to self-growth: What is the secret to building a happy life?
“The courage to be hated: The teachings of Adler, the source of self-development” by Ichiro Kishimi, Fumitake Koga
Based on Alfred Adler's principles, the book "The Courage to Be Disliked" offers a strategy for leading a happy life. Adlerian psychology is a branch of psychology that promotes the search for personal fulfillment and meaning in life while understanding how social interactions affect an individual's behavior and thought processes. This book explains how to approach self-development, enhancing relationships, and accomplishing goals using Adler's theories.
The narrative is told through made-up dialogue. The narrative shows the young man who is the primary character's journey toward understanding Adler's ideas. He starts to doubt his life and learns about Adlerian psychological theories. There, he picks up techniques based on Adlerian psychology to boost self-esteem, enhance interpersonal connections, and accomplish goals.
Adlerian psychology is concerned with interpersonal connections and situates each person's actions and ideas within a larger social framework. Since humans are social creatures, it is believed that a person's interactions with other people have a big influence on their thoughts and behaviors. As a result, Adlerian psychology is thought to be useful in a number of areas of life, including goal-achieving, enhancing interpersonal connections, and self-esteem.
"The Courage to Be Disliked" is a widely recognized book that offers practical strategies and an easy-to-understand explanation of Adlerian psychology theory. For many readers, it serves as a helpful introduction to psychology because of its narrative style and concise explanations. Furthermore, it is said that the method for developing oneself and enhancing relationships that is founded on Adler's ideas is applicable in everyday life.
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holy fuck i graduate with my masters this year
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Live in this moment !!
Live in this moment !!
“If you want to be happy, do not dwell in the past, do not worry about the future, focus on living fully in the present.”― Roy T. Bennett, The Light in the Heart
It seems a pervasive picture, not even adequately clicked, yet it holds an untold story and an important lesson we all should learn from it. I clicked this photo last year when I visited my brother’s flat and one evening I was standing…
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Oh shit I have to find a new talk therapist now
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idk why we never get to learn adlerian theory in our dev psy classes it’s always the damn freudian shut the fuck up old man ‼️
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25 pages into this book, boy, I am not a fan of Adlerian Psychology and am ready for a fist fight with the philosopher. 😤 #1Week1book
The enso circle is kinda comforting though.
By Ichiro Kishimi & Fumitake Koga
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Tbh I always headcanoned that Regulus was seen as the “thinner, less handsome” version of Sirius was because of both actual health issues and a more reserved/inward personality. I guess in my head I always saw that he had some health issues as a kid, but they would have been things that were fixed with time. And that Walburga didn’t understand that just because Sirius was an energetic prodigy in every sense of the word, doesn’t mean that his brother would be the same, and that’s ok!
Ergo, if Reg survived and was able to grow on his own terms and get healthier, more filled out, AND relaxed a bit while reforming his moral compass, the only difference physically between him and Sirius would be that he has a slimmer build and is a little shorter. Other than that the resemblance would be uncanny, he’d look like a reserved Sirius ( instead of idk reserved and dour 🧐)
Tbh I always saw a fully grown Regulus as tall as an average tall guy (like 6 feet even). Sirius just sets unrealistic expectations by existing 😂.
Oh geez, sorry it's taken almost a month to respond to this 😖 I must have missed it when I was going through my notifications after getting out of the hospital and I just saw it.
I like the hc of Regulus having health issues as a kid. I think sickly Victorian-esque child suits him. Making him a second-born child prone to illness also happens to slot him very nicely into Adlerian psychoanalytic theory (Alfred Adler, known among other things for his creation of the "inferiority complex" concept and theories about the impact of birth order on one's personality, was himself was a sickly child and a second born son who was intensely jealous of his older brother) and there's little I love more than psychoanalyzing my beloved fictional characters to death.
I can definitely see Walburga not understanding Regulus' temperament at all. She seems to have been quite an energetic woman and, as you said, Sirius set the bar and he set it abnormally high. This is why I am partial to the idea that Orion is more mild-mannered (by no means actually mild, but comparatively) and that there's some sort of kinship between Regulus and his father, neither of whom enjoy the loud, dramatic displays that Sirius and Walburga seem to relish in.
Ok so, based on your theory about Regulus surviving, I am imagining an AU where Regulus survives and fucks off somewhere lovely and warm and spends a decade and change relaxing and enjoying his new life away from any familial responsibilities or reminders of his past. He grows into a healthy adult, and is mildly dismayed that he is the spitting image of his brother. One day in the middle of the summer, he starts getting funny looks from people and has to evade the muggle police a handful of times because his face is plastered all over the news as a wanted criminal. Of course it's not his face, it's Sirius', but they look similar enough that it forces him to go even further into hiding.
Adult Regulus can be tall, he can be 6' if he likes, as long as his growth spurt is a year or two delayed, not until late adolescence. I'm partial to him being average/slightly below average height as a child/early adolescent.
I suppose, canonically, that would mean that he'd finally grow to his full height only to die shortly after. Live fast, die young, leave a tall corpse or something.
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12/19/2023
I don't actually remember taking this picture but here it is.
Positive thing: I finally had my last day of work and I got to leave early.
I was very restless all today. Like just constantly switching whatever I was doing. It's not the first time I've felt like this but I can't really tell why it's happening now. Oh well, that's what therapy is for.
I did end up doing a bunch of Japanese study related stuff today since I was switching activities so much. For my next books I'm reading アドラー流子育て (Adlerian Child Raising) and also volume 2 of ヨコハマ買い出し紀行 (Yokohama Shopping Log). I figure since one is a manga I can switch back and forth easily enough. I also got really caught up in looking for study resources but the thing is that I'm at a level where unless I'm looking for a specific subject (like pronunciation or something) there aren't really any resources for me. The best course of action is just to do what I was already doing and keep consuming native Japanese material and doing Anki.
Learning Japanese feels like such an undertaking. Not just because it's literally one of the hardest languages to learn but also the whole Japanese-learning-sphere is inundated with resources that are super overwhelming to try and sift through to see if they're actually any good or not. In the end it comes down to asking around and figuring out what works best for you. But for me that took years and years and most of it was structured (i.e. classes) so I wonder how everyone else figures it out.
Honestly it probably really just comes down to attitude and motivation. Someone with the right amount of both can get through the hurdles of figuring out what resources to use. Everyone else just gets discouraged and drops.
I was definitely one of those people who dropped. I have a lot of insecurities when it comes to Japanese, mostly due to the circumstances surrounding when I was at the peak of my learning. But I was thinking more about it today and having gone through all that is probably how I can get over new hurdles a little easier. Now that I've found the motivation, I'm kinda just like "well at least it can never be as bad as it was back then" so smaller setbacks hurt less nowadays.
Man. Study abroad was a time. I'm glad I never have to repeat that nightmare. Even terrible program management aside, those were easily the most grueling classes I ever had to take. Thinking about it, the people whose Japanese-learning opinions I value most went through their own harrowing experiences trying to learn it in some way. Maybe it's a rite of passage of some kind. (I don't actually believe that.)
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the first semester that kyle is majoring in psych he becomes obsessed with calling shit “freudian.” everything and everyone is freudian to him. that is, of course, excluding the things and people that are jungian or adlerian.
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I studied adlerian psychology and don’t have a praise kink anymore
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What do you know about the adlerian approach to autism, and therapists that might practice it? I have recently realized I am autistic and trying to find someone to talk to to help me work with this, and almost all of the therapists/counselors in my area who specialize in working with autistic adults seem to mention the adlerian approach. I am doing some research, but am curious if you have any opinions or information about this??
yeah, i used to teach at a for-profit PsyD school that was rooted in Adlerian psychology and it blew and they really took advantage of their students. i think it's pretty culty and unsubstantiated by research tbh
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different types of therapies
accelerated experimental dynamic psychotherapy
acceptance and commitment therapy
Adlerian therapy
animal-assisted therapy
applied behavior analysis
art therapy
attachment-based therapy
bibliotherapy
biofeedback
brain stimulation therapy
Christian Counseling
coaching
cognitive behavioral therapy
cognitive processing therapy
cognitive stimulation therapy
compassion-focused therapy
culturally sensitive therapy
dance therapy
dialectical behavior therapy
eclectic therapy
emotionally focused therapy
equine-assisted therapy
existential therapy
experimental therapy
exposure and response prevention
expressive arts therapy
eye movement desensitzation therapy
family systems therapy
feminist therapy
forensic therapy
gestalt therapy
human givens therapy
hymanistic therapy
hypnotherapy
imago relationship therapy
integrative therapy
internal family systems therapy
interpersonal psychotherapy
jungian therapy
marriage and family therapy
mentalization-based therapy
motivational interviewing
multicultural therapy
music therapy
narrative therapy
neuro-linguistic programming therapy
neurofeedback
parent-child interaction therapy
person-centered therapy
play therapy
positive psychology
prolonged exposure therapy
psychoanalytic therapy
psychodynamic therapyy
psychological testing and evaluation
rational emotive behavior therapy
reality therapy
relational therapy
sandplay therapy
schema therapy
social recovery therapy
solution-focused brief therapy
somatic therapy
strength-based therapy
structural family therapy
the Gottman method
therapeutic intervention
transpersonal therapy
trauma-focused cognitive behavior therapy
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