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#a trustfall of a relationship
prettyboykatsuki · 7 months
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warm-ups | gojo + nsfw + inspection
✮ tags ; afab + gn!reader (they are wearing a skirt / panties) but no gendered language, established relationship / power imbalance (they're dating but gojo is their superior) , teasing, humiliation, pussy inspection, praise, petnames (sweet thing, baby), fingering + penetration, creampies 18+
✮ wc ; 1.9k
✮ a/n ; i swear on my entire fucking life i did not rig this one at all KJSDF. the wheels just decided i promise this on my life.
idk if the writing reflects what i experienced trying to write this but . good fucking lord. good lord.
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"Let me see,"
Embarrassing. Humiliation is making your face burn hot as Gojo stares at you. He's smiling, of course he is - a lazy grin, head tilted slightly to one side. His teeth peek out, sharp incisors and even sharper canines like a light in the dim light of an empty classroom.
"Satoru," You reason, hands fidgeting on the hem of your skirt with a sigh "We're in the—"
"I want to see," He's not asking, so much as telling. Your heart races. You squirm. Earlier, when he called and asked for you to wear something cute - you thought it'd be some of his typical flirting. You decided to appease him. Not particularly hoping he would make any advances on you. It wasn't something you thought to justify to yourself.
It struck you as odd when he asked about it. The husk of his voice as he leaned in behind you and told you good before waltzing off back to his lesson. The whole day he'd done nothing else out of ordinary. Made his usual jokes and stupid, unserious flirtatious advances.
And then you were alone. The building is empty, and you're supposed to be planning practical lessons for the first years. Gojo cornered you here and sat with you in silence for a little while, eyes following your curves and edges before stopping to look at you.
He wanted to see what you wore. But it wasn't like usual. Something was different, obviously - he'd been thinking about something else and like usual opted not to tell you about it. You're sure he won't even if you ask.
It's a trustfall with him - always testing you to see if you'll give him blind faith. You think he likes seeing you flounder more than he's concerned about your loyalty.
You can't get a read on him.
"You're really—"
"Let me see," He says again, not as playful. You swallow thick. It's your fault for indulging him so much "I want to know what you picked."
You go to take it off and Gojo shakes his head.
"Flip your skirt up,"
"You can't be serious."
He looks at you. Reprimanding. He's very serious. You swallow around something in your throat again, turning your head. Focusing your attention on anything else. The open window that gives view to the darkness outside. If anyone came right now they'd see this. You decide to close your eyes after all.
Wordlessly, you grab the end of your skirt and flip it up. Holding the material just over your thighs - to give visibility to the sheer, delicate material underneath. A brief silence is followed with echoey footsteps. Intentional. He's letting his weight hit the ground each time he does it.
You know he stops when you feel him looming over you. Before you can get a worse in edge-wise, he drops down. Squats until his face is at level with your pussy.
But he doesn't touch you. You can feel his breath distantly, and you're too afraid to look. But he's careful not to touch you. When you do feel his hand, it's brushing against your ankle. Fingers playing with the frill of your socks.
"Spread your legs a little."
"But—"
The air changes. You clip your mouth shut and listen, sneakers squeaking along the tile as you spread yourself. Standing at shoulder width, making yourself more clear to view.
"Good," He says, like it needs no explanation "I like when you listen to me."
You don't reply. You just sit, and wait - heart hammering so hard against your chest like you've run a mile.
You count the seconds but the numbers feel muddled after you count up to three hundred. A little over five minutes before he moves again. He touches the palm of his hand against your knee, planing them up the tops of your thigh. A barely there movement. Goosebumps cover every single inch of you. He hums, arbitrarily running his fingers along your inner thigh but never quite committing.
You're almost too afraid to move. Not that he'd do anything bad. But you have no idea what he's doing in the first place. It's starting to make you sweat.
"These are pretty," He says, conversationally running his finger along the top seam where the bows are. Still not touching "They new?"
"U-uhm," Your fingers tighten around your skirt "Yes?"
"Mm," He tugs the waistband, letting it snap against your skin lightly "Were you thinking of me?"
"I thought you'd like them."
"I do. I like when you think of me."
You shudder.
"Were you thinking anything of it when you put them on this morning?"
"No," You answer truthfully.
"Really?" He answers back, genuine "Even in the afternoon,"
"I just wasn't thinking,"
"What a shame," He replies, soft and gentle. He runs fingers against the place where you thighs meet your legs. Still no direct touching. You feel yourself starting to get wet around where he isn't. "I was thinking of you all day."
"Oh," You mumble.
"Wanna know what I was thinking about?"
He doesn't give you a chance to answer.
"I was thinking about," A single finger, his middle finger, runs along the seam of your panties. A ghost of a touch that makes your knees weak "Giving you a nice, thorough inspection."
You can't think.
"I was thinking," He answers again, but this time he pushes and you gasp at the sudden contact "About what it might be like to watch you make a mess like this," Another press, a little harder, still not where you need "Get these nice and dirty,"
"Satoru," Your voice is high-pitched. A whine. A sound you didn't even know you could make.
"I was thinking," He repeats, removing his hand completely "How wet I could get you by telling you all the dirty, awful, nasty things I wanna do with you,"
"What a-are you?"
"It's not proper at all for a trusted grown-up hm? To be pulling up your skirt and showing off your sweet little cunt to your superior? There's windows. They'll see you,"
You can only repeat his name. "Satoru."
"Do you want them to see you?" He asks, hand gentle on your thigh. He trails up "Do you want them to see you bent over the desk while I fuck you? Or maybe you want to spread your legs more,"
You choke on your spit, trying to keep the noises in.
"Make you sit with your legs wide and fuck you with my fingers till you squirt all over the desk. Let everyone see how filthy you let me make you,"
That makes you open your eyes. Once squeezed shut, now wet with need. You turn slightly, looking down at him. He looks pleased by this, by your staring. He watches your face as he gathers the material covering your pussy, pulling it between your lips with enough friction that your knees nearly give out.
"It's good that these were so light," He offers "Didn't think you could get this wet over something like this."
Your lower lip is trembling.
He still doesn't take pity on you.
"You did well," He kisses your knee. It's the most you've gotten from him today "What should I give you hm?"
Your words feel slurred and your head feels completely heavy. "Make me cum. Please, I wanna—"
"Shhh," He coos, patting your leg "Sit up on the desk ,"
You listen, sitting up and far back enough to sit comfortable. Gojo positions you with your feet flat on the desk underneath you. He pulls your skirt up this time, guiding your arms around his neck as he pushes his hand into the waistband of your panties.
The sudden contact is deliciously overstimulating. You gasp and Gojo hums, pleased.
"So sweet," He praises, after you've finally lost all of your resolve - brain clouded with nothing but unadulterated desire. It's hard not to give into Gojo. He always makes it good for you in the end "And so wet. You'll leave a stain."
You sniffle "Satoru," You repeat. He laughs good-naturedly. It makes you huff.
"Right, right. Sorry,"
He doesn't make you wait. The feeling of Gojo's hand makes you gasp with your face buried in his neck. His fingers are thick, smooth skin cool to the touch like a balm on your ever growing heat. He starts with his middle finger, fucking into you slowly and even though it isn't enough to make you cum - it's enough to stimulate you. Already so worked up, so needy it's so good.
But he's not doing it to make you feel good. He's preparing you, wanting to give you something better.
"Gonna give you my cock," He mumbles against the crown of your head, free hand tucking your head to his chest "You're gonna cum all over it for me, okay?"
A pathetic uh-huh leaves your lips, dazed. He doesn't give you anything more after that. One finger without resistance prompts another, and he stops at three. You can feel yourself stretched. You've taken it before, more than once.
But this time feels different. Your stomach is tied in knots. Gojo pulls away from you slightly, enough to undo his pants and let his cock spring free. White hairs neat at the base, tip flushed red. He's so hard, he's throbbing against your thigh where you can feel him.
"Take me in, baby," He hums, pushing the round tip against your cunt before it catches. He lets himself in slowly "That's it,"
The intial stretch leaves your lungs feeling punched out. Already undone, nerves frayed and mind fuzzy - the soft stretch of your pussy accommodating his length leaves you shaking. Skin on skin, raw and desperate, he swears under his breath and throws his head back. His adams apple bobs slightly, smiling as he swallows.
"So good,"
He fucks himself deeper Lets you adjust to each inch, and waits to bottom out until it's comfortable. The brief moment of tension only drives your lust further out of control. You can feel every slight throb and twitch. It gives you a second to appreciate every vein and the slight curve. The deep angle he's hitting you.
Just when you think you can't lose it anymore, he maneuvers his hand between your bodies and uses his thumb on your clit. Every neuron fires at once as he rubs the abused bundle of nerves, achy and weeping between your legs.
Your fingers tighten in his shoulders and Satoru laughs. He starts to move like that, careful and practiced. He angles each thrust of his hips to time it with his fingers. All precision, all reward. He thumbs your needy clit and fucks his cock right against the sweetest, softest part inside of you. He knows it so well by now, it always remembers him.
"Cum on me, sweet thing. Just a little more."
You wrap your legs around Gojo's waist as all the tension in your body started to overflow. All your tight muscles, the hot feeling in your belly that flows and disperses through your whole body. Every sensation works in tandem in making you fall apart and all of it happens at Gojo's mercy.
"Oh, Satoru, oh,"
You cum so hard you see white in your vision. You can feel yourself pulse as Gojo fucks himself as deep into you can go. All the way in your stomach, up to your throat - it knocks all the wind out of you as your pussy pulses and holds and clings to Gojo's cock like it never ever wants it to leave.
Gojo follows you in the aftermath of your own orgasm.
A few more shallow thrust of hips before he pours his cum into you, thick white ropes making your belly feel even hotter.
You stay like that a minute, full and exhausted until Gojo pulls away to kiss you.
"Let's clean up," He offers, an apology without saying sorry "We'll finish up at home, hm? Okay?"
You nod.
"Kay."
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carlottawllms · 4 months
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Trustfall
Mason Mount x Reader Angst-ish / Fluff Word Count: 5.4K
Flashbacks in cursive TW: brief mentions of toxic relationships (nothing graphic or detailed)
My writer’s block makes me question every single thing I write atm, so I’m not entirely sure what to think of this one, but I’m hoping you’ll like it!
As always, feedback is very much appreciated! And now, enjoy 🩷
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You’d never thought that a single person could change not only your whole life, but also you as a person. But then, you’d experienced it twice.
The first relationship you’d ever been in had been a toxic one. Not straight from the beginning, no, cause when you’d met Arthur, he’d been a gentleman, a total sweetheart. He’d made you fall for his charms and good looks; he’d worshipped the ground you walked in and showered you in love. Until he hadn’t anymore.
You hadn't really noticed it for a long time. Or rather simply ignored the red flags and tried to convince yourself that it would change again, that he only did it because he loved you and was scared of losing you. Your family and friends had voiced their concerns, but you hadn't listened to them. And just like that, Arthur had changed you over the timespan of weeks and months. Made you into someone you weren't.
It had taken a very long time until you’d understood that things couldn’t keep going that way and with the help of friends and family, you’d broken up with him.
But even after that break-up, your nightmare had been far from over. Distraught by everything that had happened, you’d had huge problems building trust with people. You’d even distrusted friends who’d been by your side for years, and even if they understood why, you could feel how hurt they’d been.
A year after you’d ended things with Arthur and had made amends with your friends, you’d met Mason. He’d been a good friend of a friend of yours and said person had introduced you to him at a birthday party.
Mason had been nothing, but kind and he’d never made the impression of having bad intentions, but your guard had been so high up, you’d distrusted him from the very first second. He was a footballer and although nothing was wrong with that, their reputations weren’t the best. It was superficial and probably nothing but magazines begging for attention, but his species was constantly portrayed as notorious cheaters.
You’d had a small argument that same evening as you’d said things you regretted today, and Mason had felt judged prematurely. But one of your friends had taken him to the side and explained briefly why you’d reacted that way and from the corner of your eye you’d observed how his gaze had softened.
After that birthday, he’d asked you out a couple of times, but you’d said no every single time. You’d rejected him over and over again, but Mason had never given up. He’d been persistent and eventually, you’d agreed to going out with him for a coffee.
Despite your hesitation, you’d gotten along well and whilst part of you’d wanted to go out with him again, you’d known you couldn’t. Mason was big on PDA; his love language was touch and that had scared the shit out of you.
Arthur had used it for manipulation. He’d never physically hurt you, but with his touches he’d more often than not managed to convince you of things you’d never actually wanted.
One afternoon, after you’d ghosted Mason a little, he’d shown up in front of your door and at the sight of him with a small bouquet of flowers in his hand and a fond smile on his face, you’d crumbled:
“Mason?” To say you were surprised to see him in front of your door would be an understatement. You’d ignored him – well his messages – for the past three days for a reason and you’d thought he’d gotten the hint, but apparently, he hadn’t.
“Hi, y/n.”, he greeted you quietly, a small version of his beautiful signature smile pulling at the corner of his lips. “I erm…I know you never messaged me back, but we got along so well, and I didn’t want to just give up on you, you know?”
“Mason, I erm…” You didn’t know how you were supposed to even begin to explain what was going on and with him right in front of you know, your heart was beating out of your chest.
The hope was visible in his big brown eyes, but you could also detect a hint of disappointment at your lack of happiness about seeing him and it broke your heart. He was a sweetheart, deep down you knew that, but after building your walls so high, it wasn’t that easy anymore.
“I brought you these, too.” Hesitantly, Mason took another step until he was right in front of you. A small bouquet of your favourite flowers in all your favourite colours in his hand. “I was hoping maybe we could talk and- y/n, hey, don’t cry please.”
“I…I…I can’t do this Mason.”, you choked as tears fell down your cheeks. “Plea...please just…leave.”
“What? No. y/n, I’m not leaving you like this. C’mon, talk to me, what’s wrong?” Mason reached out in an attempt to comfort you, but when you immediately took a step away from him, he pulled his hand back in an instant.
“I…I…Mason…I don’t…”, you tried, but the sobs wrecking your body were too powerful to fight and despite you pushing him away, Mason carefully stepped past you and managed to slowly pull you along into your living room where you eventually flopped onto your sofa.
With your face hidden away in your hands, you tried to regain your composure, but the fact Mason was sitting right next to you, leaving a deliberate space between the two of you, made it incredibly difficult. He’d come here despite you ignoring him, he respected your space and yet, he hadn’t left you on your own when you were at your worst.
“I…I’m not what…what you’re looking for.”, you sobbed. “I…I can’t do all…all these touchy things, I…Mason I have so much baggage and…and I don’t want…I’d be a burden and…”
“Hey, don’t say that y/n.”, Mason whispered. He carefully got up from his position beside you and knelt down in front of you, dying to touch you, but after what you’d said it would probably upset you even further, so he kept his hands in his lap. “C’mon, love, look at me.”
When your teary gaze eventually found his, Mason’s heart dropped into his stomach. Pure sadness and fear shone in your beautiful eyes, pulling at his heartstrings.
You hadn't told him much about your past that had made you the person you were today, but he had enough pieces of the puzzle together to understand that things that seemed so easy for him were incredibly challenging for you. But the time he’d spent with you – even if it hadn’t been much so far – had taught him that you were worth it.
You were worth fighting for, you were worthy of an easy life full of love and he wouldn’t give up trying for you.
“You, y/n, could never be a burden, okay? You are this incredible and beautiful person and I get that you don’t like yourself very much right now, but it doesn’t have to be like this forever. I know you don’t really trust me and that’s okay, y/n, but please give me the chance to prove, that I mean it. I want to earn your trust and I don’t care how long it takes, you know?”
With the sleeves of your hoodie, you wiped the tears from your face. His words sparked a tiny something deep inside of you, but you couldn’t convince yourself to give in.
“Mason, I don’t think that’s a good idea.”, you sighed as fresh tears welled up in your eyes. “You’re so into touch and I can’t give you that, I just…it’s difficult for me and I can’t just snap my fingers, and everything is fine. It might never be fine, I might never be okay with everything you need and-“
“I don’t think it’s you who gets to decide what I need, hm?”, he chuckled quietly. “I told you I’m willing to wait, y/n, to give you all the time you need and to earn your trust until you’re ready for touch and whatever else there is.”
“But you love touch.”, you pouted sadly, knowing how natural it came to him.
“Yeah, I do, but is that more important than spending time with you and talking to you and getting to know you? Obviously not, y/n. It might take me a moment to get used to it, cause it’s so natural to me, but I can live without all of that. But in a few years’ time, I don’t want to look back, thinking what if, you know? We can take it slow. As slow as you want to, okay? Please don’t push me away, y/n. Give me the chance to be what you deserve.”
It hadn't been easy for you because everything in your head had been screaming don't do it, but a little part of your heart had fallen in love with Mason's words and his caring nature and as crazy as it sounded, that little part had actually won, and you’d agreed to another date with him.
Parts of Mason reminded you of Arthur and the way he’d charmed his way into your heart, but then there was this big chunk of Mason that was so incredibly different to your ex. Arthur would’ve never gone through so much trouble for you. He would’ve never tried again if you’d ignored him like that. He would’ve left the moment you'd made it as difficult for him as for Mason now.
And for the date, Mason had made it one out of the public eye. With the ulterior motive of showing you more of himself and starting his mission to prove himself to you, he’d invited you to his home and cooked for you.
The second date was followed by a third and that quickly turned into a fourth. And even in between those days, you’d kept in touch; talked a lot on facetime, shared messages and from day to day it became easier to let him in.
It had still taken you a while, but not as long as you’d thought because Mason had made it easy for you. He’d never pressured you; never tried anything, but instead he’d given you all the time in the world. He’d waited for you to make the first step and then he’d simply followed.
You could vividly remember the first time you’d grabbed his hand in public:
Over the month you’d been dating already, Mason and you had developed the habit of taking walks in the late afternoons to watch the sun set on the horizon and spend some quality time together without being watched by too many eyes.
It was a bit of a chilly afternoon as, after a rather long walk, you sat down on one of the benches around the small lake in Painshill Park.
“It’s so beautiful.”, you sighed as you let your gaze wander over the landscape. The setting sun was reflected in the water, the surface of which was becoming increasingly turbulent as the wind picked up and although you felt a little cold, you weren’t ready to leave yet.   
Mason was bound to leave for an away game in the Champions League and whilst you couldn’t really place the feeling yet, you knew you didn’t like the idea of him being that far away and too busy to talk to you as much as he normally would.
“It really is.”
From the corner of your eye, you observed Mason for a moment. The way he sat there, staring at the water and enjoying the time he got to spend with you with a soft smile on his lips. He was handsome at the best of times, but when he looked like this, peaceful and at ease, he was just absolutely gorgeous.
It was something that made you feel a little insecure at times. He could have anyone, so why you of all people? But then again, you reminded yourself that he was making as much time as possible for you and not for anyone else. He could have had it easy, but he had chosen the difficult path and had never deviated from it.
You didn't know why you out of all people, but you knew that he deserved an honest chance.
Your heart was racing in your chest, threatening to burst your ribcage and you were close to chickening out, but this one time, you wanted to be brave. You wanted him to know that it was worth it, that you were indeed worth it.
And with one final deep breath, you reached your shaking hand out and grabbed his.
Mason froze on the spot, his heart skipping a few beats before it appeared to be bursting in his chest. Slowly, he turned his head, gaze settled on your joined hands before he locked his eyes on yours and when you smiled at him timidly, almost unsure of yourself, he threaded his fingers through yours and squeezed your hand.
For everyone else, it probably seemed to be a tiny thing, nothing more than a couple holding hands, but for you it was a huge deal and Mason knew that and for the first time it felt as if you were slowly, but surely accepting and reciprocating his love language.  
“Thank you, Mase.”, you whispered, leaning your head against his shoulder. “For accepting me the way I am and giving me the time I need. I really appreciate it.”
Mason just squeezed your hand, too overwhelmed to actually say something and despite fearing he was pushing his luck, he brushed a barely-there kiss on top of your head.
After that evening in the park, things had relaxed further between you two. Not in the sense that you’d been constantly touching him, but ever since that first time, it had felt natural to hold his hand while watching TV or playing with his fingers whenever you had the chance to and one evening, you’d even been brave enough to snuggle into his side, searching for more of the calmness his touch and presence brought.
However, up until that point, you’d kept it behind closed doors. Not because you didn’t want other to see or because you wanted to hide your relationship, but because you were terrified of the others picking up on it and starting to be more open with touching you too.
But only a few days after the moment in the park, even that would change. Not that you’d had that on your bingo card, but the feeling of safety he provided gave you the bravery you needed to get over yourself and do things that had always seemed impossible.
You’d both been invited to a small gathering with friends at Luke’s and whilst you’d been hesitant to go, Mason had assured you it would be fine. He hadn’t told you specifically, but you were sure he’d told his friends that touch was a big deal for you, meaning hugs and everything coming close to it were off the table and whilst at first it had made you feel a little more at ease, now that you were about to knock at Luke’s front door, it made you feel a little uncomfortable.
What if his friends thought you were all weird? What if they-
The way Mason’s hand tightened around yours pulled you from your thoughts. “y/n?”
“Yeah?” With a brave smile on your lips, you tilted your head up to look at him.
“We can leave whenever you want to, okay?”
His big brown eyes stared straight into yours, worry and concern clearly visible on his features, and the way his lips were pulled into a fond smile had warmth rushing through your body.
“Thank you, Mase.”, you whispered, a little overwhelmed from the loving expression in his eyes. “I’ll be fine.”
“I know you will be.”, he chuckled quietly before pressing a soft kiss to your forehead. You froze for a second, still not used to how affectionate he was with you, but quickly reminded yourself that it was Mason and that it was okay. “But come and find me when you want to, okay?”
“I promise you.”, you smiled and in a split-second decision, you pushed yourself onto your tiptoes and pressed a quick kiss to his cheek. “Now let’s knock. Otherwise, they’ll think I’m even weirder than I already am."
“No one thinks you’re weird.”, Mason laughed, pulling you into his side before knocking. “Well, maybe I do, but they don’t have to know that.”
“Hey!”, you complained jokingly as you hit his chest in jest, noticing once again how easy it was to be with him.
Your worries that Mason's friends might not like you were quickly put to rest, as the moment you’d been introduced to everyone, Anouska had simply whisked you away and integrated you into her girl friend’s circle as if you’d always been part of it.
Her friends were incredibly welcoming and happy to get to know you and whilst normally you struggled with opening up and making friends, you found yourself enjoying the evening way more than you’d thought you would. Your little group talked about everything and nothing, joked about how difficult their boyfriends could be and although they probably didn’t know anything about your and Mason’s relationship, they didn’t prod, but waited for you to tell things on your own accord.
It had been a long time that you’d felt this at ease around so many and especially new people.
For the majority of the evening, you hung out with the girls. Mason had come over once or twice under the guise of wanting to ‘be part of the girl’s stuff’, whilst actually he’d just wanted to make sure you were okay.
He’d shot you an apologising look when you’d whispered to him that he didn’t have to mother you, but by the cheeky smile on your face, he’d been able to tell that you’d simply been messing with him a little as you did appreciate the way he so openly cared about you.
The clock was close to striking 11 when you started to get a little tired. Everything about today had been new and whilst it had been more than exciting, it was becoming a little exhausting too and you needed a bit of a break.
“I’ll join Mase for a bit.”, you announced with a smile and when they all nodded and told you to speak again later, you got up and slowly walked over to where Mason seemed to be in deep conversation with Luke.
You didn’t really want to interrupt them, as their time off the pitch was limited as well, but after having spent all evening with new people, you longed for some familiarity and Mason’s calming presence and whilst you were still debating whether of not to go over, Mason had noticed you already.
He could see the uncertainty in your eyes, clocking on to how unsure you were if he was okay with you interrupting his conversation, so with his head tilted a little, he sent you a reassuring smile. And like just about always, it made your heart skip a few beats.
His smile was one of your favourite features of his. It could light up any room – especially your heart though – and whenever it grazed his lips, he radiated that little bit more warmth than he did anyway.
“Hello you.”, he said softly the moment you found your spot in front of him. “You’re alright?”
“Yeah, just a little tired.”, you nodded, not noticing how Luke discreetly moved away to give you some space. “They’re all very nice, just needed a bit of a break for a moment.”
Mason, who, in a constant need of knowing you were okay, hadn’t been able to take his eyes off of you the whole evening, breathed out in relief. Deep down he’d realised very early on that you were enjoying yourself but hearing it from you and seeing the happiness shining in your eyes relieved a heavy weight from his chest.
He focused on the way your eyes crinkled as you smiled up at him, your cheeks slightly rosy from the tiredness taking over, but the way you looked so happy made him all giddy. He’d known you’d get along well with his friends and their partners, but to see it with his own eyes was something else.
When you’d come over, you’d simply wanted to talk to him a little, to ease the exhaustion in your mind, but now that he was right in front of you, you couldn’t help but long for something else. After everything he’d done; after the weeks he’d spent earning your trust by giving you the time and space you needed, without ever putting any kind of pressure on you, he deserved a little more too.
He deserved something that showed him just how much you appreciated everything he’d done and how much you trusted him already. Not once had he given you the feeling of not being good enough and now it was on you to show him that he was good enough too.
Mason froze to the spot when you stepped closer and it took him a moment to wrap his head around what was happening as you cuddled into his body, arms circling his waist and head finding a home on his chest, but the moment you let out a deep breath of relief and snuggled further into his shirt, he eventually reciprocated the hug and pulled you flush against him.
His heart was beating out of his chest, threatening to burst his ribcage and he was sure you could feel it thundering against your cheek, but you simply melted a little more into him as one of his hands began to run up and down your spine.
Cuddling had become somewhat normal over the last couple of days, but he’d never thought you were comfortable enough to show it with other people around.
For a while you simply stood there, wrapped up in each other’s arms and enjoying the embrace and the comfort it brought you both.
A couple of months back, you’d never thought you’d open up to anyone ever again, thinking you’d stay by yourself to safe yourself from heartbreak, but Mason had put it all into perspective. It had been one bad guy, one person who’d broken your heart and used you, but that didn’t mean that everyone was like that.
He had been a lesson. A lesson to be more careful, to recognise your own worth and to choose carefully who was worth being a part of your life.
And when there was one person worth of being in your life, then it was Mason. The most thoughtful, patient, caring and loving person you’d ever met. The epitome of a good person.
Your person.
Filled with comfort and love, you carefully tipped your head back and rested your chin on his chest to look at him and when his eyes locked on yours and you could spot the shimmer of tears in his, you squeezed him gently.
You were about to say something, when a jaw escaping your lips caused Mason to laugh quietly. “Want me to bring you home?”
“I erm…”, you dropped your gaze to his chest in hesitation. There was nothing to worry about, but the thought of him saying no was still nagging in the furthest corner of your brain. “Do you think I could stay at yours?”
It was as if you’d dropped a bomb, leaving Mason speechless. You watched his lips part in surprise and the way he gulped was nothing short of heavy and made you feel a little anxious, but his arms squeezing you tightly reassured you that little bit.
Mason felt pathetic when you reached out to wipe the stray tear that rolled down his cheek, but you staying over at his was such a big deal and the fact you’d asked him to out of nowhere had simply overwhelmed him in the best way possible. It meant that you trusted him enough to let your guard down completely, to be at your most vulnerable around him and he couldn’t help but feel as if he’d eventually made it to the summit of your heart.  
“I erm…”, he croaked, trying to keep the rest of his tears at bay. “Of course you can. I’d love for you to stay over, y/n.”
Carefully, he pushed a stray strand of hair behind your ear, the tips of his fingers just about brushing your soft skin and when goosebumps erupted all over it, he softly cupped your cheek.
From the way he was looking at you, you could tell that he really wanted to kiss you and whilst you’d envisioned a different place for your first kiss, you really wanted to feel him too, so instead of overthinking it like you always did, you made the first move, bringing your face a little closer to his, and when Mason dipped down to meet your lips, you didn’t pull away, but instead let him kiss you softly.
It was your first kiss in a rather long while, the very first one with Mason and it was the most perfect kiss you’d ever had. He was gentle, downright hesitant but when you kissed him back, he sighed softly, before applying a little more pressure.
His head was spinning, and he was sure that this one taste was enough to be addicted to you and the feeling of your lips against his, but from the way you didn’t part from him, he could tell that you felt the same.
After that evening, things had developed further, and things had become a lot easier for the both of you. Now that Mason knew you trusted him entirely, he was a lot more relaxed around you and the way you were more physical and open with him encouraged him to be the same around you.
Whilst he was still a little scared of overstepping and making you uncomfortable, he didn’t shy away from hugging you from behind when you were in the bathroom removing your make-up. Neither did he held back when it came to pinching your bum or kissing you randomly and you showing him the same amount of love kept reassuring him as the days went by.
And for you?
Well, after everything you’d been through with him, you could finally be sure that he wasn’t worthy of just your trust, but also your love. You’d told him you loved him a few weeks after that evening at Luke’s and ever since that moment, things were simply perfect.
You loved being around him, holding his hand, hugging and kissing him and whilst you’d never thought it was possible, sex with Mason was simply amazing too. He cared about your feelings, about you as a person and made sure to tell you every day.
He worshipped you as much as you worshipped him.
And now, four months into your relationship, you’d eventually asked him to meet your family. Mason had been bricking it ever since you’d told him, knowing that after your awful ex, your family had become wary when it came to men in your life.
When you’d arrived a few hours ago, your family had welcomed him kindly, but you’d both been able to read the hesitation in their eyes. Mason’s hand had tightened its hold on yours ever so slightly in fear, but after they’d all warmed up to each other, the doubts had slowly but surely been washed away.
Your dad had pulled you aside not too long ago and told you that he really liked Mason and that the way he looked at you like you’d hung the moon made it obvious just how much he cared about you. He smiled at you and pulled you into a hug and with a kiss to your head he’d said that he couldn’t have asked for a better person to be by your side.
Now it had gotten a little late and you’d moved to the living room. You were cuddled up to Mason, with his arm around you and your head on his chest as you listened in to him talking to your brother.
With the nerves having kept you on edge all day long, everything about today had been more exhausting that you’d thought it would be and you’d become a little sleepy, so you snuggled a little more into your boyfriend’s body, willing to pay attention to his and your brother’s conversation, but soon enough his steady heartbeat against your cheek and the soft rumbling of his chest whenever he chuckled, had your eyes growing all heavy and it didn’t take long for sleep to take over.  
Mason had noticed a while ago that you’d gone all soft on top of him, basically melted into his body and from your shallow breaths he could tell that you’d fallen asleep on him.
For the first time ever when others were around and as he looked down, a peaceful expression on your beautiful face, he couldn’t help but squeeze you a little. The realisation of how much he loved you was so overwhelming sometimes and he didn’t know where to put all of these huge emotions.
“Oh, look at her.”, your mum suddenly cooed. A smile grazing her features at the way her daughter had nodded off. “That’s never happened before, I think.”
“Hm?”
“She’s never fallen asleep on someone else before.”, she explained. “At least not when others are around. She never told me why, but she must trust you a lot, Mason. Otherwise, this would’ve never happened.”
Never having been good at accepting compliments, Mason dropped his head shily. In an attempt to hide his blushed cheeks, he dropped a kiss to your head and when you subconsciously snuggled even further into him, fuzziness spread through his whole body.
“I’m just so lucky to have her.”, he whispered, the tips of his fingers just about brushing the warm skin of your cheek. “I know it’s not been easy for her at all, but she’s so special and so wonderful and she deserves everything good in life. I’m so grateful I get to be in her life and I really hope it’ll stay like this forever. She’s the best thing that’s ever happened to me.”
From the corner of his eye, he watched your mum wiping the tears from her cheeks. Her eyes were focussed on you and the way you looked so peaceful, but it wasn’t until you dad spoke up, that he realised just how much they approved of him.
“I think you’re the best thing that’s ever happened to her, too.”, he said, voice slightly strained. “After everything that happened with Arthur, we didn’t think we’d ever get the old y/n back, but you, son, you brought her back and I don’t think we can ever thank you enough for that.”
Mason gulped. He’d only been able to guess how difficult it must’ve been for your family after all hell had broken loose, but to hear it himself now was something entirely different. It was harder and more emotional, and only made him want to be the one for you forever even more.
“There’s no need to thank me.”, he mumbled, a little overwhelmed himself now. “I just knew straight from the beginning how special she was and that I really wanted – and still want – to spend as long with her as she wants me to, but I’m glad I could have a bit of an impact on her after all the awful things she had to go through. I just want her to be happy.”
“Thank you for taking care of my little girl, Mason. Thank you for loving her the way she deserves to be loved.”
—————
I genuinely hope you enjoyed reading this. You would make my day if you left a little feedback so I can see what you liked and what I can improve on 🩷
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elisysd · 13 days
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5. We'll talk, then we'll cry, then we'll laugh 'til we're done
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Masterlist - Previous - Next
Chapter soundtrack: TRUSTFALL - P!nk
Behind a Haas. Never in his career would he have ever thought he would end up behind a Haas. Not that he thought it was a bad team, he truly thought that both Kevin and Nico were fighting the best they could with the car they had. But struggling this much, in a car that was supposed to fight for wins, against one that was the worst of the grid hurt. It wounded his ego and the questions he had already answered hadn’t helped to ease the blow. So, seeing you, adjusting something on your microphone as you were talking quickly with a Spanish journalist, made him sigh. He was dreading your questions as usual but, a part of him was hoping that the chat you had a few days ago and your confessions had improved your relationship. He hoped that it changed something. He hoped he hadn’t been the only one to feel it. As he walked to you, he first noticed your apologetic and empathetic smile. 
“What a weekend for you Charles. Could you tell us more about what happened?”
“I don’t know, really. I feel like I’m repeating myself each weekend but… we have to truly sit and talk about the car and what we can do to improve because we can’t keep going like that. I had no feeling with the car, I was struggling in each corner. Truly one of the most painful races in my career.”
“Do you have any hopes for the situation to improve?”
“Thankfully, Fred already managed to build up a strong team spirit. We can all talk freely, that’s something that was seriously lacking before, so I trust Fred. We will bounce back and come back stronger.”
“Thank you, Charles.”
Getting out of the media pen, he was in a better mood than when he got in. It had felt nice to talk with you, even briefly and if Silvia had not pushed him to leave, he would have stayed. Your gentle smile had calmed him down. He shook his head, suddenly feeling very stupid. Now was not the time to start to develop a crush on you. He would only make a fool of himself, knowing perfectly that you would never reciprocate whatever feelings he could have. He breathed in and breathed out the hot hair of Florida before Silvia told him that he had to hurry to not be late for the meeting. He couldn’t wait to get inside, at least there would be AC. But he wasn’t excited for the meeting ahead. He knew it would be a long one. Fighting with a Haas was not supposed to happen in any way, shape or form. 
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You were coming out of your post race debrief as the air felt cooler on your skin. You were tired. It had been a very stressful weekend between the race preparation and your nerve wracking interview with Charles. It had left you emotionally empty. Luc was a tough subject. One you hated talking about. You hadn’t much if you were honest. You had kept it bottled out inside of you, hoping that by not mentioning it, it would be easier to let yourself heal. It was stupid. And you were only seeing it now. You hadn’t been fair to Charles. He didn’t deserve it. And still, he had not judged you when you had explained what had happened to Luc. It felt good. But quickly, you felt scared. By talking about your grief, you felt a little lighter as if it was freeing you. But you didn’t want to be free. You didn’t deserve it. You wanted to keep Luc’s memory alive within yourself. You didn’t want to let go. You didn’t want to let him go. You didn’t want to forget him. And talking to Charles felt like it. You shook your head, trying to get a grip and decided to wander the paddock, fishing for information. That was what you loved to do. It was quite easy, you were just walking from one end of the paddock to the other, trying to see if people were available for a little chat. You were doing that a few times. That was kind of like your working out routine on race weekend. It was how you would get little insides from the teams, new and useful information.  
Though, you were a bit hungry. You hadn’t had the occasion to eat lately, busy with everything that was happening around you. A few biscuits here and there had made their way to your stomach but that was all. You could feel a migraine coming and with the sun still high in the sky and the air still hot overall, your visions start to blur. You barely had time to lean against a motorhome wall when you felt two strong hands grabbing your shoulders and a voice that was feeling so far away from your ears. You felt yourself being forced to sit down on the ground as the voice screamed for water. You felt the tip of the bottle against your lips as the fresh liquid was being poured into your throat. It didn’t take long before you started to feel better and that’s when you saw a red cap and two blue green eyes worryingly looking at you. 
“Nothing good ever comes out of Miami.” you mumbled sheepishly, feeling your cheeks redden. 
“That’s something I can agree with you.” the monegasque replied.
You tried to get up and stumbled. If it weren't for Charles' quick instincts, your face would have met the ground. His hands around your waist, your face close to his chest and his eyes intently looking at you made you feel suddenly very conscious of your surroundings. Trying to avoid his intense gaze on you, you tried to search for a diversion, anything that could break the intimacy of the moment. 
“Nice pants.” you ended up saying. 
“Yeah? One of my friends is a designer. He gifted them to me. They stand out, I wasn’t sure at first but…”
“It was sarcastic.” you cut him. 
“Oh.”
“You make questionable choices in every aspect of your life as it seems.”
“Come on, they are not that bad.” he defended himself.
“You’re right. They are worse.” you chuckled, making Charles do it as well. 
“I will blame the heat. You don’t know what you are saying.” he softly smiled. 
As you were about to leave him to go back to your hotel you felt him next to you. 
“Let me give you a ride. I would feel better knowing you made it home safely.”
“You don’t need to act like a knight in his shiny Ferrari, you know.”
“I would feel responsible if something was happening to you.”
“I’m a big girl.”
“A big girl who faints when there is a little sun outside.” he teased you.
“I don’t want people to see us together. I don’t want anyone to imagine that something is going on between us.”
“Do you trust me?” he asked. 
“No.”
“Well, you will have to because I’m not letting you walk away alone.”
You were about to reply when he took your hand in his and forced you to follow him.
“I promised I would show you that some people are decent human beings. This is me proving it to you. Accept it.”
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Reaching the hotel, you still look awfully pale and you didn’t even try to argue when Charles told you he wouldn’t leave your side until he was sure you would be okay on your own. You found it stupid but you were so tired you didn’t send him away. It would have been useless anyway.
“You know,” you began arriving in front of your door, “ I can manage from there. I’m going to order room service, take a shower and work a little…”
“Not even in your wildest dreams. You won’t work after almost fainting. You are going to rest.”
You glared at him. Who was he to try patronizing you?
“I’m going to do whatever the hell I want after crossing this door. I don’t even know why you even think you can allow me to do stuff or not. You won’t be there to watch over me.” you raised an eyebrow, crossing your arms over your chest. 
“Do you want to test me?” he replied in the same tone as you. 
“What if I do?”
Quickly he snatched the card from your room, hanging loosely between your fingers and threw you over his shoulder as he unlocked the room and walked in. You didn’t even have the time to protest as you were already sitting on your bed as he poured a glass of water from your carafe. He didn’t even ask you before ordering two burgers with double portions of fries for you from the phone. 
“You are truly something else, Leclerc.” 
“I know.”
“Very humble with that.” 
He laughed, making you roll your eyes, slightly annoyed. Understanding he wouldn’t go anywhere, you decided to still work on what you had planned. You took your laptop out of your bag and opened it on a blank document on which you typed Imola 2023. You prepared a few documents like the race recaps, the track history and started to write some notes and highlight the parts you deemed useful. You could hear Charles muffles and his breath down your neck as you turned around, your left hand closing your laptop. You both stared at each other, waiting for the other one to flinch and give up. 
“I said no work for you.” 
“You’re not my boss.” you replied. 
“I might not be him, but I’m sure Jean would be exhilarated to know that a member of his team fainted in the paddock because she doesn’t know how to take care of herself.”
“I didn’t faint.” you corrected him, gritting your teeth together. 
“Thanks to me. Listen, there is a little break before Imola, you can rest. You don’t have to work right now.”
“I feel fine! And I want to prepare some stuff now. I have the weekend in mind, I’m in the mood to work and I surely didn’t ask for your opinion on that. You can leave, I’ve never asked you to stay.”
“Maybe you didn’t but I want to.” he argued. 
“You’re so annoying!”
“Great, so now you know what it feels like whenever I look at you!”
You hissed and turned your back at him. Maybe if you ignored him, he would leave you alone. As you opened your laptop again, it was closed almost immediately by his hand and you barely had time to process the situation that he took it away from you.
“That’s it! I’m calling the security!” 
You didn’t have time to do so as someone knocked at your door and as if he owned the room, Charles went to open it, said a few words that you could barely make out and came back, the trail of food in front of him. 
“I don’t want to fight…” he sighed. “Let’s make peace around two very greasy burgers.”
“Is that allowed in your diet?” you arched an eyebrow. 
“Will you release an article about me not following it properly?”
You shook your head in his direction. 
“Then we are good. And after this disastrous weekend, I think I deserve a treat.” he told you before taking a huge mouthful. A little bit more shyly than him, you did the same. 
Surprisingly, he was easy to talk to. You talk about many things, the sport's history and he tells you how much he loved Senna and how much he meant to him. He talked about his brothers, his friends and how one of his best friends was the dad to an adorable daughter whom he loved very much. He even was keen on showing you pictures of her. He talked about his life with such ease that it threw you off. He didn’t really know you but yet he trusted you with so many private parts of his life. He felt like an old friend, someone you had met in another life. You were not one to believe in soulmates but yet, he could make you change your mind. Maybe in a past life you were friends. Maybe in a past life you wouldn’t have made all the mistakes you made in this one. Maybe in another life, you had a family. 
You started to feel emotional and he noticed it. 
“Anyway… what about you?”
“What about me?” you repeated. 
“Tell me something about you.”
You sighed. You were much more at ease with making people talk about themselves than you were with talking about your life. 
“What do you want to know?”
“Anything. Why is your job that important to you? To the point that you don’t even want to be my friend…”
You gulped, fidgeting with your napkin. 
“That's all I have left. My parents don’t talk to me, my best friend has her own life, I travel most of the time, you know how it is. My job is the only constant in my life, the one thing that truly makes me happy. I’m alone. And it’s fine. I’m not saying that for you to pity me. I made peace with it. I’m alone, it’s a fact.”
“Having a good support system is so important for me, it helps me, it grounds me. I’m sorry you don’t have that.”
“You don’t have to. I’m fine, you know.” you smiled. 
He scooted closer to you, snatching fries on your plate making you whine in protest.
“So, you studied journalism.”
“No shit Sherlock.”
“How was it?”
“Fun. Tiring. I spent a year in New York to study there. I used to cover the Yankees’ games and the Knicks’. It’s fun how it had nothing to do with F1. I was supposed to meet an old friend there in the next few days.”
“No way!” Charles laughed. “That’s a funny coincidence, I’m going to New York for a few days as well and I’m invited to the Yankees’ game!”
It made you laugh as well involuntarily. That’s too big of a coincidence for you to keep your poker face. It seemed life had decided to play you by throwing Charles in every aspect of your life. 
“I didn’t take you for a baseball fan.”
“I’m not. But I like to discover new things. It will be fun, I’m taking my brothers with me.”
“I could teach you a thing or two about the sport if you’d like.”
You didn’t know why you said that and from the look on his face, he wasn’t expecting it either. There was silence. Uncomfortable. You checked the time and stood up, almost running to your suitcase, pretending to look for something as you’re unable to look him in the eyes. 
“It’s… it’s late and I have an early flight tomorrow. Not that I’m forcing you to leave but…” you stuttered. 
“You need to sleep. It’s okay, I understand and you’re right it’s late.”
You could see in his eyes that you hurt him. You didn’t mean to, of course, deep down you truly appreciated what he had done for you today. He cared and it had been such a long time since someone cared for you that you didn’t know how to take it. You closed your eyes and breathed in before getting up and looking at him. 
“Thank you. For today. I haven’t told you and I’m feeling so ungrateful when you went out of your way to make sure I was okay. I haven’t been the nicest and you didn’t deserve it. You’re a good guy. Maybe you were right, there are still decent men out there.”
He smiled at you and took a step towards you, putting a hand on your shoulder. That was the first time he had ever been that close to you, willingly. No accident, no fainting, just a calm and steady comforting hand on your skin. You shivered and felt your cheeks getting hot. If he noticed it, he didn’t comment on it. 
“Maybe you don’t want to be my friend but I want you to be mine. And I’m always there for my friends. Whether they like it or not.” he chuckled. 
“Why?” you whispered. 
“Because you look like you need one. And I like lost causes. I’m a Ferrari driver after all.”
That time you laughed. A real, big and loud laugh. It made him smile wide. You shook your head, punching him lightly on his chest. You went with him to your door and as you opened it, you both jumped noticing Marion in front of you. She was as surprised as you were. Her eyes darted between Charles and you, making you both uncomfortable. You could already guess what was going inside her mind. Charles sent you an apologetic look and avoided Marion as he left you alone. 
“Marion, I swear it’s not what you might think it is.” you rushed to explain. 
“Y/N. I don’t care. I really don’t. I won’t judge. I know how tempting it can be, just be careful. If you want to play with fire, you will get burned. These guys are pure gasoline on dry wood under a heatwave. One small ray of sun on it and it’s wildfire spreading for weeks.”
“You don’t have to worry. Nothing happened, nothing is happening and nothing will ever happen between Charles and I.” you stated. 
But for an unknown reason, you had a hard time believing in your words. 
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Author's note: It's progressing. Slowly. But don't worry, they will get there. For now, I really do enjoy writing their banters.
Don't hesitate to leave a comment or an ask, as well as reblogging and leaving a like. Besides the fact that I absolutely love to read you, it helps a lot for the story to find its audience. I also have a taglist for this story, so if you want to be added so you never miss a chapter, let me know.
If you wanna be part of the taglist, let me know.
Taglist: @itsjustkhaos @thirstylion @cmleitora @charizznorizz @sltwins @boherahpsody @herondalism @roseamongthorns13
If you are tagged and do not receive the notifications, please take a look at your parameters!
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chalkrevelations · 7 months
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I’m not sure if this is going to pan out, but Kanghan is reminding me very much of Vegas Theerapanyakul at this point. And some of this may be stock trope work, but
They’re coming from different directions, to arrive at the same point. Vegas’s father expects everything from him, far beyond reasonable expectations, which means Vegas will never measure up. Kanghan’s father expects nothing from him, which means Kanghan has nothing to measure up to, which means he will never measure up. So both of them are desperate for validation from a father figure that they’re never going to get. Instead, they turn to cruelty and violence within their own sphere and scope, because if you can make people do what you say, if you can pull the reaction you want out of them, that’s replacement validation. You are effective, you have successful control of your world, and people give you the emotional response you want – contextually, fear and submission in both cases.
Pete (in the torture chamber and the safehouse) and Sailom (from the very beginning) break the cycle of “positive” feedback that Vegas and Kanghan previously have received for their violent and cruel behavior. Both Pete and Sailom are actively defiant. Pete laughs in Vegas’s face during torture; Sailom fights back, throwing Kanghan’s money in his face and punching him. Pete spits out the congee from the bowl Vegas shoves his face into; Sailom spits on Kanghan’s shoes rather than “prostrate” himself. This is fascinating – different, “more interesting” - behavior to both Vegas and Kanghan, who are determined to get the response they (think they) want. And ultimately, in frustration, because Pete will not bow his head and eat, because Sailom will not bow his head and prostrate himself, Vegas and Kanghan turn to the belt and the gun. And in neither case do they like what they end up seeing – they don’t want to actually see Pete or Sailom reduced. In fact, I submit that both of them learn they don’t actually want submission, once they see what it looks like from the subject of their fascination.
(And then both Vegas and Sailom get pushed into the role of caretaker, and suddenly a new way of being effective, of being able to do something meaningful - a new type of validation – opens up. This doesn’t take away from the desperate need either Vegas or Kanghan still have for validation from their fathers, but it does give them another point of connection with another person and becomes the bridge on which a relationship is built.)
I think what Pete gave Vegas in the safehouse when he handed him the rope, what actually rocked Vegas’s world, wasn’t submission but surrender – a trustfall.
I’m interested to see where they go from here with Kanghan and Sailom’s relationship, and if there's an equivalent moment - some kind of trustfall - from Sailom.
(And whether it comes before or after the "I'll buy you myself" line. I'm trying not to draw TOO many parallels, but that has the capacity to be Kanghan and Sailom's Ep 13 soup-tipping moment.)
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rainbowrelyea · 1 month
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Tagged by @fazedlight. I was actually tagged in something very similar aaaages ago by @inkedroplets so consider this me finally responding 😆
Last Song(s): Technically? "Pancake Robot" by Parry Gripp (it's a kids song that my littles like to blast on Alexa). Intentionally, I've been rocking P!nk's entire "Trustfall" album quite a bit lately
Currently Watching: Wife and I are watching Next Level Chef together, on my personal docket I'm debating starting either Merlin or Warrior Nun (feel free to weigh in on my decision!)
Three ships: Supercorp, Wayhaught, and Bishlova. *Honorable mention to Agentreign and Bechloe
Favorite color: either green or blue or somewhere in between
Currently consuming: Copious amounts of Valentine's day chocolates 💝
First ship: Hmm, didn't really "get" ships until recently, but I suppose my first would be Rachel and Lucy from Imagine Me & You
Relationship status: Married to wonderful woman who has been patiently putting up with my nonsense long enough that I'm starting to question her sanity 😜
Last movie: Captain Marvel rewatch, in preparation to finally watch The Marvels for the first time (I can't tell you how sad I was when I missed getting to see it in theaters).
Currently working on: a handful of supercorp fics, probably 2-3 that I'm actively working on, while the other ones float around in my brain reminding me they are still there. Also just started on my art piece for SG Mayhem
No-Pressure tags: @fabulousglitch @casualkoalatea @kiakahawhovatic @thealieninhidng @appropriatelystupid
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presiding · 5 months
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just saw that there's a monster in the hull update and realized i'd missed three of those........this + the audio are such treats giggling and kicking my feet about it fr. going to leave a comment on the fic itself but in the meantime needed to drop a letter on here to say i love the way you write billie--her loneliness, her thoughtfulness, distrust of yet attraction to emily and everything she represents........not to mention the way she's haunted by daud, the longing for a life she can't fathom and will never have !!! society if everyone gave billie the complexity she deserves. and your banter and prose are stunning as always lord everything abt this fic is so good. bringing wine to you on the deck to drink together about it in spirit and yes pun intended
🙏😭 thank you so so much I don't know what to say! that's amazingly kind of you ♥ its a genuine pleasure to like. double down on themes and nuance and less popular characters and just like. idk. trustfall into the fandom that there's people with taste like you, and you can invite them onto your metaphorical deck for wine and meaningful looks 🍷♥♥♥
re: billie - no one else in the dh universe comes close to whatever she has going on
hiding my thoughts about writing dh2 billie >
there's so much material to her!
i thought i'd never write for dishonored 2 (not derogatory - its my favourite game). its undoubtedly linear & doesn't have the mystery or grit of dh1 IMO.
but i saw lapin post that billie & emily comic, and i saw a few other people i respect mention billie/emily and it had me rotating them until the abjection/emily-monster thing clicked and then it was downhill from there
but there's more to think about - what billie has been doing with herself, how she feels about daud & the whalers at this point in her life, her relationship with sokolov (god.a separate rant), her history in karnaca & dunwall, emily's place in the empire and how that fits into billie's story, her lifelong revenge arc, and comparisons between jessamine & deirdre.
like. when you consider billie's perspective you realise how fucking badass she is for going back to dunwall. she not only did it scared she did it scared for her life. suicidal level flimsy disguise trapped in a tin can with your enemy. etc
PLEASE tell me if you ever decide to post that daud & billie fic you mentioned a while back :O
#asks#corpseprince my beloved <333#thinkin bout your one-day fic. daud and billie are SO difficult to write#not simply father daughter but like. the suicide pact vibes they have and the all consuming nature of dauds bonds#and there's a strong running tension between them#not to mention neither being the type for feelings#the more 'dishonored fandom friendly' fics im working on i've deprioritised recently#yuri on the way <3 there was a deficit anyway!#mostly excited for brigmore smut#if i may bitch on your lovely post (sorry). if you cbf with that stop reading here#idk. it keeps happening#so i post a chapter. maybe get 2 kudos that week#which is nice and i smile every time im stoked to see readers around#but then one or two days later some unpleasant fucko on tumblr has taken one of the ideas i put in the new chapter of my fic#and turned that into a low quality textpost like it was their idea. it gets a heap of notes#and its always a *highly specific* idea after i posted it. and i know what the fandom is talking about broadly so it sticks out#i dont mind at all when its like mutuals or people who have commented or talked to me then its more like 🤝#like. someone who doesnt appear to have ever interacted with me or the fic#im not trying to flatter myself by saying theres no chance its a coincidence. but its offputting as hell#backhanded signal of success? bestie thats my meta post but you made it worse <3#so my focus rn is niche-r stuff for smart cool people with taste#THE RAMBLING. *tops up your wineglass if you made it this far*
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ospreyeamon · 1 year
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lana, theron, and prescience
One of Lana’s letters says Arkous felt a connection form between her and the player upon the moment of their meeting. Lana confirms it in the optional Rishi romance scene; “It’s like when we first met. I knew our fates were going to be intertwined completely”. It is implied that a similar bond springs into being when Lana encounters a Pub-side player – though Lana is less candid about it as they are loyal to opposing factions – but also that the same thing happened to her with Theron, offscreen on Maanan.
It’s not like the Force says 💛One True Work Husband💛 upon meeting Theron any more than it says ❤️Great Love Of Your Life❤️ or 💙Captain My Captain💙 or 💚Tea Buddy💚 about the player character. It’s just … this one. This one is important, pay attention. A whisper of future knowing without whys or whens or hows.
Nothing that Lana couldn’t ignore, if she chose to, but Lana trusts in the feelings she gets from the Force. She’s the one who reaches out to Theron initially, on Maanan. (Theron tells a Pub-side player that he’s received a message; Lana says that she senses the presence of a potential ally.)
On Ziost, after their original alliance has ended and while Theron is still nursing sore feelings about being trustfall dropped on Rishi, Lana seeks him out again. When the Republic and Empire have both surrendered to Zakuul and everything has gone to hell, Lana calls Theron up to join her seedling rebellion.
Much later, during the mess with the Order of Zildrog, we get to see Lana in murderous overcorrection mode. Theron was maybe the only person other than the Commander and herself who she didn’t suspect of being the mole. Even after he shoots her, Lana’s traitorous instincts are still telling her that traitorous Theron isn’t a traitor and Lana is so angry about that.
(Theron’s optional death on Nathema is something I’m inclined to write off as an unrealistic product of KotFEET’s delusion that “meaningful player choice” is providing endless opportunities to kill companion characters. Lana is stubborn and self-assured and has repeatedly blown past the player character’s objections to take what she believes is the best course of action; investigating Arkous even if you tell her not to, continuing to work with Theron even if you say it’s a bad idea, putting you in charge of the Alliance even if you don’t want it. Dragging Theron back to the shuttle with her regardless of the Commander’s objections would have been more in keeping with her character than abandoning him to die solely on their say-so.)
From my understanding, a Force bond is the manifestation within the Force of a connection that exists independently of it. Even artificially constructed bonds rather than spontaneous natural ones; after all, you wouldn’t make the decision to intentionally tie yourself to a person you had no connection with. Where things get weird is when Force precognition is added into the mix. You’re not tied to this person yet but in the kaleidoscope of the future there are a thousand possibilities where you will be. When you meet, the presence of what might be is so overwhelming that in the Force it can almost feel like what is.
Which is kind of awkward when one of your destined people turns out to be from the Republic. And also Force-blind so he has no idea what’s happened. And you let him get captured by Revanites and he takes it as a betrayal even though you didn’t mean it as one because you were certain he would survive.
Force bonds and precinct awareness aren’t necessarily markers of a positive relationship. If a person is liable to become your great nemesis whose life you will destroy as you destroy theirs before you die together with your hands around each other’s throats on a crashing ship like you’re the deuteragonists of an opera, obviously they will ping as someone of significant future import.
Theron registers to Lana as an ally, though, before they’ve even met. How could that not influence her behaviour? Lana doesn’t tell him because not being able to feel their connection means that he’s not affected by it in the way she is and because the knowing is an edge she has over him. Even though they have their little personal alliance, they still try to score over each other when the opportunity to aid the Empire at the expense of the Republic or vice versa presents itself. It’s just jostling though. Lana knows that Theron is Special and Important (and Hers). Imperial values hold that you must never hesitate to sacrifice people for the greater good of the Empire but Theron is much too Special and Important to justify loosing for any short-term gain. Theron is Lana’s Force-marked ally which makes him more useful to the Empire alive than dead.
But holding back to allow the Revanite’s to capture Theron isn’t sacrificing him because Theron will survive. Lana knows he’s been trained to resist integration, knows he’s been caught before and managed to turn the tables on those holding him. Either Theron will escape or Lana and their other allies will come for him. Lana would never truly abandon Theron unless forced to choose between him and the Empire; this is just her seizing the opportunity that has presented itself to them.
Theron doesn’t understand that though. Theron can’t feel the connection that marks him as Special and Important. He doesn’t know about the bond because Lana very intentionally failed to tell him, so he assumes that Lana was fully prepared to let him die. That Lana would be prepared to allow someone who was Special and Important (and Hers) to be tortured on short notice isn’t something that occurs to him. And that realisation is distressing for Lana because, even though she’s too proud and wary to admit it to Theron, she misjudged the consequences of her actions. She didn’t intend to break his trust in her. It’s important to Lana that Theron trust her because she trusts Theron.
(She doesn’t want them to die together as enemies on a ship crashing into an ocean moon. It may be terribly romantic in operas but in real life it’s just straight up terrible.)
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awentworth · 10 months
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Surely the person responsible for giving us Roman Roy, Gerri Kellman, and their twistedly challenging and endlessly compelling relationship - the person who wrote them INTO EXISTENCE - would also be capable of giving us a satisfying ending for their story, right? Right?? 
Jesse Armstrong?? I’m taking this trustfall tonight - I sure hope there’s something, ANYTHING, there to land on! You led us to this cliff, man, and dangled this thing in front of us, telling us to jump. And we’re jumping! We’re going! It’s happening!! (please have something there to catch us 😭)
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drabbles-mc · 3 days
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Trustfall
Canche x GN!Reader
Warnings: 18+, language, light angst
With the help of This Prompt List by @creativepromptsforwriting and my trusty Wheel of Names with every character I’ve ever written for, I’m aiming to write a fic in 500 words or less every day of March.
Prompt: pattern
Word Count: 500
A/N: the way this is reminding me that i have a multichap for this man that's almost done. i need to finish that soon so i can post it and get it out of my drafts lmfao. anyway! enjoy this in the meantime!
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It had been so much easier to compartmentalize your relationship with Canche when he was only in Santo Padre for a night or two. The pattern of push and pull was almost fun in a way because it wasn’t a constant. There were no obligations, no worries.
But ever since the night the Yuma charter stormed the clubhouse, it seemed as though he’d taken up residency there. It was rare for you to walk in and not see him, when it used to be the exact opposite.
Even before everything that had happened, the most you and Canche would give each other in front of people were small smiles and knowing glances—the real exchanges always happening after hours and behind closed doors. But these days you couldn’t help but to wonder if he ever even realized you were there. He didn’t owe you anything—that was part of the deal. Still, you couldn’t help but to find it a little strange.
Your night was over even though there were still plenty of men lingering. Marcus had given you the okay to head home and you weren’t looking to argue about it.  You slipped quietly out the side door to get to your car around back.
You were about to unlock your car when you heard footsteps coming up behind you. Assuming it was one of the men from Santo Padre, you spoke before turning around. “Alvarez said that I’m good to go, so do whatev—”
Canche cut your sentence short with a hand on your hip. He turned you around to face him and pinned you back against the driver’s door of your car. Despite his hand still resting on you, he left a sliver of space between you.
You let the back of your head rest against the window of your car. “Was starting to think you just didn’t recognize me anymore.”
“Part of me doesn’t.”
Your brows knit, tied together with confusion and frustration. “What the fuck’s that sup—”
“You thought it was going to be the same? After all the shit that went down?” His grip on your hip tightened. “Shit you didn’t bother telling me about?”
You put your hand between you. “You think they bothered to tell me about any of it?” You scoffed. “Not like you gave me the heads-up when your guys wanted to turn my clubhouse into fucking Swiss cheese.”
A smirk flickered across his face. “Your clubhouse?”
You rolled your eyes. “You know what I mean.” You paused. “What do you want, Canche?”
“We’re gonna be here for a while. It’d be nice to have someone around that I can stand,” his grip eased, “that I can trust.”
“I didn’t think trust really had anything to do with this.”
His lips curled up for a moment. “It didn’t. Maybe it should.”
You finally let your hand rest against the leather of his kutte. “Maybe.” You felt his tense muscles ease and you nodded towards your car. “C’mon, then.”
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Okay! So, I have an idea for an au. It focuses a little more on the platonic yan X-Men and Reader and their relationship, but the au is a bit more... wild? Kinky, maybe? It's more for an older audience. I am a bit inspired by Genshin and those weird playlists i find for dancing and being... "down bad"... but it isn't about or for Genshin. And it's all platonic. Because that is what I do. Let's discuss it:
So, imagine each teen/adult is a small god/entity of a territory/kingdom. They live as long as their territory does, and the people who worship them and live in their kingdom add to their strength. Of course, each kingdom/deity has their own special skills, trades, and traits. But they also have the whole... conquering, problem. It isn't romantic or s*xual, but... it can get weird, at times. They're deities who are older than the human race and some of the other younger deities, but they're a bit like... young adults. A little childish, sometimes petty. Still ancient by human standards, but they can make most of their own choices and own up to them in full.
To avoid wars and the like with each other and to avoid risk of death or fading away, they will have games to deal with issues. If they want to rule or conquer another region/deity, they have to win the game they're playing. If you win, the deity/ies who lost are in their control and their kingdom and people are too until the next games. If they/you lose, you are under the control of the winner and whatever they want to platonically do with you.
The problem is they're all weird, they have their own platonic kinks, and they like having friends/kids who can't leave them. If they want to make them into a drone for a bit, only able to feel their love for them, then that's what will happen. If they want to tie them up and cover them in platonic kisses, then that is set in stone. If they want to make them forget for a bit, make it so they can't worry at all or remember to and only feel at peace, then it will be. (None if it is s*xual, okay? I am so sick of everything being about s*x and romance. So are the platonic yans and Reader. Why can't kinks be platonic, too? Who doesn't want to platonically blindfold their friend and do a trustful trustfall, catching them and then rewarding them with a slice of cake and butterfly kisses? Who doesn't want to take away the pain of a companion for a bit, just letting y'all cuddle in bliss for awhile? I hope y'all get what I mean). They all need to smooth over issues, and this is the healthiest way they can think of doing so. There are safety rules set up, plans in case something goes wrong for even a minute. Look, the winning platonic yan wants their friends/wards/kids to feel good for a bit while also letting them have all the power. So, it's a win-win in their eyes.
It all gets a little fierce when Reader is involved, though.
A deity around their age or younger, and their traits are kind, loving, caring, and down for a good time. They are always giving gifts, letting everyone know how much they care, and always dressed to their best, handsome and beautiful and gorgeous. So the other platonic yans are always trying to catch them, to win a game against Reader... But it is near impossible. Reader is good, and they are a polite winner. With a sly, warm grin, a kiss to the knuckles regardless of which platonic yan it is, and pushing a bowl of sweets towards them with twinkling eyes. They don't mind losing against Reader... But they really, REALLY want to win against them, even just once. Reader never even keeps their control over them, backing out of the games before it can be set in stone.
Of course, they all love Reader. Who doesn't?! Their kingdom is one of the largest, full of art of all kinds, and is one of the most peaceful. They are cute, they're nice, and sometimes they all just really really really want to put them under and get them so relaxed. So completely under, that they can't fight any love they give. So they can relax for once, so they aren't worrying over anything. And to have that kind of power over them... It would be special, wouldn't it? To be caring for them and being cared for in return, with no issue or doubt or fear. Because those wouldn't be allowed, not one bit.
Of course... They'd have to actually WIN against Reader, which no one has ever done before... Well... except once... But THAT was ages ago! And no one will fess up who won over them, or what game it was, or how it went! It drives them mad, not knowing!
But the games are coming up again, and this time, if they win... They want to try out a few ideas with their favorite friend/sibling/rival/kid...
(Y'all see what I mean? This AU is kinda new, and the best I can manage. I also maybe want to give us all a way to relax a bit more, and this seems like the perfect way to do it. If y'all want to ask questions, please do. Just please keep in mind this all PLATONIC!!! So anyone who wants s*x or romance, get out. NOW. Okay? And find that somewhere else. For those who enjoy the platonic stuff, feel free to stay. And those who want to have some more relaxing and cute and slightly (insert word for platoncially hot) (IS there a word for platoncially hot?) snippets and prompts with Reader, feel free to read it and send in a prompt idea or two).
(Why aren't there more platonic bad*ss songs? Or friendship songs that AREN'T for a cartoon?? Come on, music makers! Please please PLEASE do a playlist or song or album about platonic hotness and being cute and being friends and being kick*ss buddies til the end!!! At least one that isn't about romance... or... eugh... s*x...)
(I need to come up up a name for this au...)
(🖤Ace of Hearts💖 AU it is!)
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frankieofmd · 5 months
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It’s a Trustfall, Baby
Author: @FrankieOFMD
Artist: @jickdraws
Beta readers: @EdsStAugustine1 @tallshipsallday Charlie(Jockles), 
Characters: Izzy, Ed, Stede, CJ, Badminton Twins, Lucius
Relationship(s): Izzy/Ed/Stede
Rating: E
Additional Tags: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Alternate Universe - High School Reunion,  Comedy, Dark Comedy, Guns, Anal Sex, Anal Fingering, Blow Jobs
Warnings: None
Summary: Izzy is a hitman. When his latest hit goes awry he decides to head home to attend his 20-year high school reunion. He hasn’t seen Ed or Stede since that fateful night that separated him from his best friends just before graduation. A fic about finally filling the gaping holes in one's past and future.
Wordcount: 12,956
Read on AO3
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motocorsas · 10 months
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Pedrenzo, Aleix and Martín, Rins and Mir and Aldeguer and Alonso
pedrenzo is real to me. i just KNOW they've almost divorced like five times but they're happily married and have a lovely condo in vienna where they can argue til the end of time. they're the only real enemies-to-lovers story i've ever cared about. quintessential sports drama turned relationship drama. lorenzo is the top of my list of riders most likely to come out as gay. he is a QUEEN, on and off track. i love it
aleix/jorge is so funny to me. they are hiding NOTHING. i don't really like a cheating narrative so i guess aleix's wife is fine with it. it's a bi4bi marriage. and jorge makes a good boytoy and a great friend even if he approaches this gay tryst in a very hetero fashion, trying to keep it bro-y despite this not being his first or last fling with another guy. as a long term commitment i don't really see it but if aleix retires after 2024 he'll probably still invite jorge over every once in a while.
fermin/alonso is fun as a friends-to-lovers thing with a subtle straight-to-gay conversion, but it's impossible to pick who starts as straight. it's absolutely not both of them but neither of them are really believable as the gay one either. two besties exploring their sexualities with each other as a bizarre bonding ritual/mutual humiliation/trustfall thing, i guess. i can see them having some kind of bitter feud in the near future that breaks them up. moto2 is like that.
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negative-speedforce · 4 months
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OC music ask game for Sohelia, Siv, Hailey, and Jay 💧🗡💞❤️💔👀🕑👋✍️💥
What's your OC's...
💧Cry song(s)?
Sohelia: When, marjorie, Sorry
Siv: What Was I Made For?, self destructive, We Watch Our Sad-Eyed Angel Fall, Once More, With Feeling!, Behind the Mask
Jay: this is me trying, Saudade
Hailey: Lover in the Sky, Bad Dream, Hungry Heart
🗡Angst song(s)?
Sohelia: mercy, I Didn't Ask For This, Body and Mind
Siv: One Day The Only Butterflies Left Will Be In Your Chest As You March Towards Your Death, Whispers, You Should Be Sad, Dynasty
Jay: you're somebody else, Scars
Hailey: the blue room interlude, Enemy, Love Like This
💞Love song(s)?
Sohelia: Hug All Ur Friends, All My Friends (Soho's the biggest aroace to ever exist lol)
Siv: Island, go to hell, The Saint and The Sinner, Stay, Darling, Cross The Line
Jay: Higher Love, As If It's Your Last, 10,000 Hours
Hailey: Devil in Disguise, Strange Love, Ruin My Life, Out Of The Woods
❤️Favorite song(s)?
Sohelia: Daniel in the Den, Inertia, Dear Arkansas Daughter, Soldier, Poet, King, Two Birds
Siv: Gods and Monsters, Ribs, Eat The Acid, Ancient Dreams In A Modern Land
Jay: Cherish, Style, Time After Time, Cut To The Feeling, 2002
Hailey: thank u, next , Special, Work, Wild Side
💔Least favorite song(s)? (I will not be linking these because most are annoying af and I don't want to screw up my Youtube reccomendations)
Sohelia: Dance Monkey, Cotton Eyed Joe
Siv: What Does The Fox Say, Gangam Style
Jay: Who Let The Dogs Out, Teenagers
Hailey: Love Shack, All About That Bass
👀Are there any songs that represent them and another OC('s dynamic/relationship)?
Sohelia: BFF (Matt), no body, no crime (Thaddeus), TRUSTFALL (Vanessa)
Siv: She (Gina), Storm Chaser (Hailey), Doomsday (Eobard)
Jay: Little Talks (Siv), Two (Cassandra) Storm (Cassandra)
Hailey: Same Place (Torryn), I'm Coming After You (Siv)
🕑Do they listen to music often?
Sohelia: Not really, she doesn't have time
Siv: Not that often, it's just not a priority
Jay: Fairly often
Hailey: Probably the most out of the vast majority of the OCs
👋What song(s) best represents their personality?
Sohelia: More Than I Am, Mulan
Siv: Panorama, Lilith, Battle Cry
Jay: Count On Me, Cure For Me
Hailey: Ghost, Elastic Heart, How Would That Feel?
✍️What song(s) best represents their story?
Sohelia: Blood in the Wine, Not Who We Were, Something Wild
Siv: Villains Pt 2, Hayloft II, What Do You Make of Me?, Rue
Jay: We Go Down Together, Funeral
Hailey: Dead Girl, Arcade, What If It Doesn't End Well
💥If your OC was having a cool/badass moment, what song would be playing in the background?
Sohelia: Underground, Queen of Kings
Siv: Belladonna, god sent me as karma
Jay: Mess With Mine, Transgender
Hailey: Needed Me, That Bitch
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the-alpha-incipiens · 4 months
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20 questions for fic writers
shamelessly stolen from @sapphicsandscience <3 questions and rambly answers beneath the read more!
How many works do you have on AO3?
63.
2. What’s your total AO3 word count?
451,140.
I’m kind of impressed that it’s almost half a million, but also just how much I wrote in the last two years after not writing/publishing anything at all in 2021.
3. What fandoms do you write for?
Currently, Star Trek: TNG and PIC. Before that, the fandom I wrote the most for was Once Upon a Time. Everything else was just two or three fics, at least on AO3. I’ve been writing fic for decades so there are A LOT of fics and fandoms that have been lost to time. (Random shout out to Battlestar Galactica, which I wrote for back in my LiveJournal days!)
4. What are your top five fics by kudos?
I’m going to do two sets here, because my All Years one are all OUAT fics no one cares about anymore, and I have enough fics published from this year to have a top five of 2023 so my current fandom has something to read that will make sense to them lol.
All Years
The Fire’s Found a Home in Me - my Dragon Outlaw Queen magnum opus, the one shot collection that makes up the bulk of my Flicker Beat universe that divulges in season four. Technically “unfinished” but complete since it was never intended to have a true ending.
It Happened Once… - a Evil Captain Charming crackfic that honestly has way more kudos than I expected. This one for some reason sees a lot of traction still. It was originally supposed to have a just-as-cracky sequel, but I never finished it.
A Loaded God Complex - ah, Golden Queen, my guilty pleasure OUAT ship. Set in s6, this was the start of a set of one-shots that took the romantic Golden Queen that finally blossomed in that season and ran with it. Mostly involves a lot of dark power struggles masking as sex. Aptly all titled after Fall Out Boy lyrics, if I say so myself.
Put Your Venom in Me - another Golden Queen fic, see above.
The Computation - a little Dragon Queen one-shot I did, short and sweet. Honestly surprised it’s on here, because it’s not my best work by any means.
2023
peace - my Picard/Crusher fic set directly after the epilogue in the PIC s3 finale. I was pleasantly surprised by how much attention this fic has gotten. I had suspected I would end up writing a prequel, but I never thought it’d turn into the four part series that it has. I hope everyone still enjoys it.
Mastermind - the first Star Trek: TNG fic I wrote since I was a teenager watching TNG for the first time! This was entirely thanks to my friend Jess, if I’m remembering correctly? She prompted me to rewrite the season 2 episode “Manhunt” with Beverly in it instead of Pulaski, because my favorite toxic trait of Beverly’s is her jealousy.
what could’ve been, should’ve been (you) - my PIC s3 Picard/Crusher masterpiece. I got the idea for this by the end of episode two, struggled with it as the season went on, and then finally wrangled it into something that I truly love.
in the business of misery - jealous!Beverly makes a reappearance in this s4 TNG fic that fixes QPid. Because fuck Vash, okay.
trustfall - dlfshfsl this fic. If what could’ve been, should’ve been (you) is my PIC masterpiece, I think trustfall is my TNG one. I disparage it a bit by talking as if it’s shameless smut, but honestly I’m quite proud of it as a character piece as Picard and Beverly navigate a new relationship and new dynamics across 11k of words. Set in TNG s3, post-Sarek.
5. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?
I try to! I genuinely appreciate comments, because I find it quite difficult to give them myself, so as a part of trying to be better I also try to respond to comments. I’m an awkward turtle, though, so I feel like I usually end up babbling about things people probably did not care about. If I don’t babble, I usually just leave a short and sweet “thanks for reading” that I hope doesn’t come across as insincere.
6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?
Probably Winter Song, a OUAT fic I actually wrote for a holiday fandom advent calendar we did back in the OQ fandom. It’s a wedding fic, and smutty as is my usual, but it’s got a heavy dose of sadness. I sort of tried to make it hopeful in the end, because ending a Christmas fic with no hope felt like I was killing Christmas.
Another OUAT fic I wrote, A Spark to Ignite, was also really angsty, now that I think about it and doesn’t involve any character death (canon or otherwise). It was supposed to have a part two that fixed it but I never wrote it.
7. What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?
Oooh. I’ll be polite and not take “happiest ending” to be dirty, even though I could list SO MANY fics for that. 
bound to break, my Greatest Showman AU that I wrote for Outlaw Queen (OUAT fandom, again) ends pretty cleancut happily after having some angst in the middle. And it’s technically a multi chapter fic, though it’s short lol.
I Know, I Know, I Know (I Feel the Same as You) as my Outlaw Queen college AU always makes me happy when I think about the ending.
8. Do you get hate on fic?
Not really. I’ve gotten some comments that were definitely unnecessary and mean-spirited, but nothing major. Truthfully, I’m not nearly a big enough deal to get hate.
9. Do you write smut?
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA. Sorry, nothing against anyone who doesn’t, but writing smut is basically all I do. It’s what I was known for in my previous fandom. It’s the thing I find the easiest to write, and secretly I suffer from a lot of insecurity because I feel like it’s the only thing I actually write very well. For a bit, in the OUAT fandom, I felt a little like a smut jukebox and it was entirely my own fault. But I wrote a lot of fun things and ultimately I enjoy writing smut.
10. Do you write crossovers?
I definitely have in my distant fic writing past, but nothing recently. OUAT almost counts as a canon crossover, given the story of it.
11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?
Not to my knowledge.
12. Have you ever had a fic translated?
No.
13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?
No, not really. My great network of fic writing friends have definitely provided excellent guidance and suggestions that have been enormously helpful, and that’s the closest I’ve gotten.
14. What’s your all-time favorite ship?
Lol I feel like this is impossible to answer? My current hyperfixation is Picard/Crusher, and that’s a ship I’ve loved for a very, very long time. So maybe it’s that. But I’ll always hold a place in my heart for Outlaw Queen and Dragon Outlaw Queen (especially for the latter, since I wrote SO MUCH of it). Adama/Roslin is my OTP from back in my LiveJournal days that will also be special to me.
15. What’s a WIP you want to finish but probably won’t?
Funnily enough, it’s not a Star Trek one, even though that’s my current fandom. The WIP I really, really wish I had finished is Where the Burn Marks Form. I had SUCH PLANS for Dragon Outlaw Queen and Calida and got too intimidated by what I wanted to do to actually write it. Sometimes I think it’s for the best though, because I think any remaining DOQ fans might have been sad about what all was supposed to happen (though it was always supposed to have a happy ending).
16. What are your writing strengths?
Smut. Once upon a time (lol), threesomes in particular. Ironically I used to struggle a bit with writing just two people having sex after writing so much Dragon Outlaw Queen, but I find it not as difficult anymore.
Character voices. Not to brag, but something I pride myself on is getting a character’s voice right. It’s something I work very hard at, and stress a lot over, but generally feel like I succeed.
17. What are your writing weaknesses?
Literally anything else? You want long, detailed plotty fic? Sorry, can I interest you in a smutty one shot instead. You want something angsty? Not really my style. You want a well-plotted completely alternate universe fic? LOL please, I write fic so I don’t have to world build. Canon compliant or canon divergence or bust, baby.
I write on vibes, and I’m sure sometimes that is blatantly obvious. I have the vaguest of plans whenever I sit down to write something, and I go from there. Probably someday I should try to have actual concrete plans and not just “hmm what if i do this” vibes.
18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic?
Lol okay let me piss off the entire Picard/Crusher fandom real quick: IN MY OPINION, it is annoying to write dialogue in another language unless it’s like… blatantly obvious what you’re saying. Very rarely is there a point to it, and it can be easily sidestepped by “blah blah blah,” he said in French. Basic phrases, sure. Pet names, have at it! Several sentences in another language?
Look I don’t speak French. If you put French in your fic, I’m having to pull out Google translate and heaven help me if it’s dirty talk, because now Google is translating “I want to fuck you,” to English from different languages (French, it’s French, I didn’t have this problem in my other fandoms). I wish if people were going to do that, they’d at least make a footnote (I would 100% be willing to find out how to format it) and!!! I think you can still use html to set it up so that when you hover over text, it gives you a little mouseover text where you can have the translation!!! That way I don’t have to one: try and scroll down to the end notes hoping for a translation and thus breaking my immersion as I scroll back up, or at least if it’s a footnote it’ll have an anchor taking me back to the sentence in question.
Sorry rant over, everyone please continue writing however you wish, I will deal. And honestly if you use the same French phrases enough I’ll learn them anyway, so it won’t matter in the long run. This absolutely is not a deal breaker for me when it comes to reading a fic, it’s just a pet peeve.
19. First fandom you wrote for?
Um, probably Harry Potter but that is my long-forgotten days.
20. Favorite fic you’ve written?
trustfall as mentioned above for Star Trek: TNG. With trustfall, it was maybe the second or third fic I wrote for Star Trek (I mean, at least not counting back when I was in my early teens writing for it) and I really think it's just some of my best work? It's a smut fic, but I think there's really, really good character exploration in it. It easily could have just been a fic where Beverly soft dommes Jean-Luc and all you get is that final scene, but I think the build up really makes it worth it. idk idk I have a lot of feels for this fic lolol.
Wishes in the Dark for OUAT. My key party in Storybrooke fic!! aka my Awkward David fic. I think this is one of the best fics I've written, period, for a lot of the same reasons as above. It's 30k, it's got Dragon Outlaw Queen, but more importantly it's got David lusting after Regina and Mal and getting the chance to sleep with them with Snow's permission... and then also Robin joins in and David realizes some things about himself. There's a whoooole side quest of things that was supposed to happen after this story that I never wrote. It's also got some really tender Evil Charming, because I couldn't resist.
And that's all folks! Thanks for reading if you made it this far, I know I really rambled. <3
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ramabear · 2 months
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Hey just wanted to drop in to say after reading trustfall, you have made me fall in love with the series again. Even moreso than reading saoid. I love your focus on the bkdk relationship. I know you are busy in the wizarding world but I do hope you revisit trustfall again.
aww thank you!! i appreciate it.
I would say that i'm definitely not done with trustfall, but my interest in fandom takes a while to circle back around to the same one again. I work on the chapters when i can and when I have more to post, i certainly will.
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sagedumortain · 11 months
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Emie, hello! Hope you’re doing well ❤️
I am popping up because I’m really, really curious about your Infamous oc, Evangeline, so without further ado… 👀
For the Infamous ask game, if you’re up to it, I’m gonna go with:
1. full circle
2. bandmates
3. wild card
4. seven
Have a lovely day/night!❤️
~ Gia
hi gia!! such good questions, thank you! 🎶
infamous oc asks
Full circle: What is the first song they ever wrote? Played? What’s the most recent?
the first song evangeline ever played was called trustfall. it ended up being the title of their first ever EP. as for the first song she ever wrote, it didn't even have a title and she wouldn't let anyone see it, ever. the most recent song she wrote is titled brave enough by now and is inspired by the impact her breakup with seven had on her.
Bandmates: How do they feel about the members of the band? Would they still be interested in stardom if they weren’t with that group?
the members of the band are truthfully evangeline's closest friends. she trusts them completely and hopes they trust her just the same.
and evangeline wants to write music, she wants to sing and perform. that was something she wanted before the band existed and it's something that she would still want to work towards even if she wasn't part of the band anymore (though she would be heartbroken, being with her friends is so special to her).
Wild card: Tell us something about your MC! 
evangeline has a reversible octopus plushie, and she always has it with her when on trips or long recording days. it's on the happy side most of the time, but it very rarely can be found on the angry/upset side. she will bring it with her on the tour bus, and she will leave it on the angry side for seven to see at least once or twice.
Seven: Do you have headcanons about their friendship and/or romantic relationship (past or future)? What do you imagine some of their best memories are? What do you think some of Seven’s favourite things about your MC were/are?
evangeline believed seven was the one for her, her other half, the person she would spend the rest of her life with. one of their best memories are writing songs together in her garden, and laying on the grass looking at the sky, holding hands. for the rest, it'll be easier to imagine more once more chapters are out i think.
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