My brand new website is live! Engage with all my poetry and leave your comment or like.
https://tinashemanyanya.com
Thank you being part of my community.
I am eternally, devastatingly romantic, and I thought people would see it because 'romantic' doesn't mean 'sugary.' It's dark and tormented — the furor of passion, the despair of an idealism that you can't attain.
I’m used to abrupt love. Love that consumes you from the very first touch. Love that makes you question everything about yourself, and them. And how you could change yourself to make them love you more.
But, the more I think about it. The clearer it becomes that what I have experienced isn’t love. It’s careless, it’s hard work. It’s time consuming. It creates anxiety and fear, a dependency for their continued acceptance. An urgency for their attention. Like a starving child who cannot communicate they need food.
This is different. This is slow. There is no urgency or pressure. I can exist and know whole heartedly he wants to exist with me, in whatever reality we choose. I can breathe and he will listen and still think I’m beautiful. I don’t have to change any part of myself to make him love me, because he chooses me just as I am. And I am enough.
🍁They say I don't like anything, but they never asked about books, movies, poems, stories, science, skies, sunsets, sunrises, rain, stars, moons, lighting, darkness,
And every other thing that is related to art, science, and, moreover, life.
I was there in a forestKneeling With my eyes closed Feeling the earth, the heartbreakThe wet sand that I clinched with my fistsA declaration of war perhaps But it felt good to the touch.
I lowered my ear to the ground To listen to the sound of the mighty, invisible, wild river of the night. Maybe she will comeThis is the place she is said to visitIn my anguish I shall await her arrivalForever…
I am no one's love. I am no one's first choice. I ain't in anyone's poem. I ain't anyone's obsession. I am not anyone's muse. I am not my best friend's favourite. I am just loud, weird, hopeless and misunderstood.