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tojisbbg · 4 months

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𝙞 𝙬𝙖𝙣𝙣𝙖 𝙗𝙚 𝙮𝙤𝙪𝙧𝙨

❝secrets i have held in my heart, are harder to hide than i thought; maybe i just wanna be yours.❞

♡ gojo satoru ♡

a/n: writing another gojo smut since the last one i wrote of him flopped. 😞💔

reblogs, comments and likes are always appreciated <3

(also, a lot of you have been dming me and it's honestly so sweet, shoot me a message anytime :D)

content: gojo satoru x fem!reader, reader is extremely horny lol (hypersexual??), sassy gojo (he's a little dick sometimes), fluff, smut, best friends to lovers, not edited.

...

"well, you look like shit." gojo snorted, entering your dorm room as you woke up from your short-lived night's sleep. you let out a yawn, doing that weird whole body shaking thing before sitting up; rubbing your eyes to see your best friend more clearly.

he looked equally worse as you, dark eye bags, chapped lips, arms crossed over his chest along with a scowl painted on his lips.

"thanks, you don't look any less shitty yourself." you snickered, leaning against the headboard as you watched him roll his eyes before making his way towards your bed; sitting on the edge.

"i wonder why." the white haired male grumbled, a small glare thrown at your direction.

"hmm? i don't know what you're talking about." you innocently batted your eyes, making him narrow his eyes.

"i would've been done studying by two in the morning if you would've stopped blowing up my phone every two seconds about how roughly fucking me would help you memorize the formulas better." gojo complained, making you bite back a laugh.

"well, you could've just go on dnd or block me." you shrugged, indirectly calling him a dumbass.

"you threatened to kill yourself if i did that."

"oh."

"anyways, what time did you stop studying and hit the lights?" gojo changed the topic, examining your tired face.

"i don't know, i think five-thirty?" you tried to think hard, but, recently all these nights where you pulled all-nighters have been a blur.

"not bad, i slept around that time too." he sighed, rubbing his temples while wincing in pain.

"hurts?" you asked, hearing him hum in response.

"yeah, i took painkillers before getting here but it's not really helping." gojo groaned before looking at you through half-lidded eyes, his words making you pout.

"well, i can't really help you with that. but, i can offer you some mind-blowing head instead." a smirk tugged on your lips as you threw a wink at him, making gojo look at you with an unamused look.

"this fucking early in the morning too? god, it's barely seven in the morning." he stared at you in disbelief, making you chuckle.

"jeez, i'm kidding. no need to act like you got a stick up your ass all the time." you stretched, while gojo scrolled on his phone through social media along with his emails.

"you gonna do final revisions on the way to campus?" he asked you with curious eyes, making you let out a hysteric laugh.

"fuck no, i stayed up till five something reading and writing notes until my fingers went numb. i couldn't even fuck myself to sleep because of the pain." you casually answered, making gojo's nose scrunch up in distaste.

"fucking hell, y/n, you're filthy." gojo commented, making you laugh before you crawled towards him, sitting on his lap as you pinched his cheeks.

"but you love me." you cooed, squishing his cheeks into a pout as he let you. gojo's arms instinctively were wrapped around your waist to make sure that you don't fall and crack your head open.

"unfortunately." he sighed.

this is how it has always been for you and gojo, his inevitable torture starting from when you both were in diapers. both of your families were extremely close, your mother being high school besties with his mom.

of course, both women decided to continue this legacy by making sure that their children grew up together. so, you've been stuck to gojo by the hip.

gojo's family was extremely wealthy, like filthy rich. his father owned one of the biggest company in all of japan. your parents, however, owned a humble sushi place in kyoto.

nonetheless, gojo never looked down on you or treated you like you were some ant that could be stepped on. he was like your protective shadow, scolding you when you acted out, being there to comfort you when you were down or struggling, and he dealt with all your stupid jokes.

as you both grew older, puberty hit like a truck.

no, not even a truck; like a fucking tsunami.

your body matured and your hormones went absolutely wild. you don't know what the hell happened, but you craved for sexual pleasure so often. after discovering the magic of masturbation, you did the act almost religiously.

your jokes were pure filth, full of suggestive language. it was like the only thing that circled your mind was dick, dick, dick, sex, sex, cum, cum.

no, quite literally.

you were horny almost 24/7 for some unknown reason.

oh, and you were still a virgin. yeah, shocking.

your situation wasn't helped after realizing how fucking hot your best friend became either. gojo began to hit the gym, basically turning into a gym rat in high school as you accompanied him after school every day before heading home together. he became beefy and so fucking tall, nearly 6'4ft.

no wonder why girls in high school chased him like he was the jackpot. well, they still do now that you both attended college.

though he was a pretty face, gojo was smart as hell. well, the both of you are; it was kinda like a mutual academic rivalry you both had. of course, it was all for shits and giggles.

he was a math nerd, meanwhile, you hated the subject with a burning passion. you liked english better, as your reading and writing skills were beyond talented. so, you and gojo made a fair deal, he'd help you with your math homework while you'd help him with english.

sometimes you both would do each others homework when it was time to cram study for other subjects. the subject you both have a common liking towards was science.

people sometimes mistakenly thought that you and the snow haired male were a couple. the truth is, you both were just super close best friends. gojo got used to your dirty jokes and remarks, no longer affected by them, as it was like common language for him now.

"can you eat the damn banana like a normal person for once?"

"why? you wish i was deepthroating the banana in your pants instead?"

"y/n, which outfit looks better? the first or second one?"

"neither, stay naked and let me smash, pleaseee."

"oh my god!! you look so handsome satoru, i'm literally gonna cum on your face."

"look at you wearing that tight black compression shirt, you slut!"

"put on a shirt and cover those tits before i suck them, toru!"

"y/n, i'm at that one plushie store downtown and there's like a bunch of sanrio shit. imma get that one hello kitty headband you were looking last night for you."

"oh my god?? hello, what the fuck, i'm literally gonna let you say hello to my kitty, toru. ugh, i love you so much."

"do you need help on doing your sit-ups? i could hold your legs down."

"yeah, but don't come too close or else my pussy is gonna start pulsating your name in morse code."

"i don't know what to get you for christmas, y/n."

"how about you lathered up in coconut oil and wrapped in a cute pink coqutte bow under my tree?"

"you horny fuck, oh my god."

"you idiot! i don't care if they taste bad, i told you to suck on those cough drops to help you soothe your throat."

"but i'd rather suck your balls, satoru."

"for the love of god, seek therapy."

"sex therapy with you?"

"you gonna stay on me forever or get ready for class before we're late for our last final exam?" gojo playfully pinched your side, making you yelp as you rubbed the site.

"jerk, i was thinking about how this is the perfect position for me to cockwarm you." you said, earning a flick to the forehead.

"you got ten minutes or i'm leaving you." gojo ignored your whines, standing up with you still clung onto him like a koala.

"satoruuu, i don't wanna go! they're gonna brutally torture me for the next hour based on organic chemistry." you dramatically cried into the crook of his neck.

"the school is gonna kick us out if we don't take this exam, y/n. it's worth like sixty-five percent of our final semester grade. besides, we both studied hard for this. you'll be okay." he rubbed your back comfortingly, making you pull away with a huff.

"you have enough money to buy the entire university, satoru."

"my dad is gonna burn me alive, y/n."

"okay, fine! i have a better solution. how about we start an onlyfans? you know, we both could occasionally do solos or you know... fuck each other too! like-"

"no."

"satoru!! hear me out." you tried to reason, but gojo knew it was all bluffing and you just wanted to stall. so, he forced you down from his hold, making you stand on your feet as you looked at him with a glare.

"ten minutes, you big baby." gojo said before leaving your room.

---

it felt like you just survived a war, coming back home with nothing but trauma written all over your face.

what the fuck was that exam?

all those hours of studying this entire week, sleepless nights, missing meals... all gone to waste?

you punched in your lock combination on the small keypad outside your dorm room, hearing the small beep as the door unlocked. with a twist of the knob, you opened the door and entered. you saw the familiar pair of shoes by your door, not paying much mind to it as you kicked your own shoes off to the side.

you saw gojo leisurely laying on the couch, mindlessly scrolling through his phone.

"when did you get here? the exam didn't start until eight." you asked, your voice barely audible from how exhausted you were, physically and mentally.

"like fifteen minutes ago. my proctor started the exam like twenty minutes early by accident, since the clock in that room was broken." he explained, making you nod your head as you walked to the couch.

you tapped his long legs, ushering him to bend them so that you had space to sit. a moment of silence graced the atmosphere, neither of you uttering a single word.

"it was shit." you both blurted out at the same time, looking at each other with equal shock.

"you too?!"

"fuck yeah. i mean like, what kind of formulas were those?!"

"i know right?? it was like another language, completely different from the review packets."

"man, i should've just given up and fucked myself to sleep. at least, i'd get some good sleep."

"bro, you and fucking yourself. one night without having your fingers inside your pussy won't kill you." gojo sat up, shaking his head in disbelief that your concern was something so ridiculous.

"uh, yeah it will since you're clearly depriving me of your dick." you retorted, making him roll his eyes.

"whatever. what are you gonna do now?" he asked, leaning towards the small table to grab his water bottle, opening it to take a sip.

"have rough kinky sex with you." the words casually flew out of your mouth, catching the snowy haired male off guard as he choked on his water.

"i'm being serious!" he said in between his coughs, watching your laugh at his reaction.

"i'm gonna sleep, what else, idiot? i need my brain to rest and recover from all that trauma. besides, we do this every time when it's finals season, satoru. you got amnesia or something?" you joked, patting his back to help him stop coughing.

"sorry, my brain is malfunctioning. my dorm or yours?" gojo asked after clearing his throat.

"since you're already here, let's sleep in mine. i'm gonna go change into something more comfortable. if you wanna change out of those, there's a spare pair of your sweats and t-shirt in my closet." you informed him, making him nod as you both got up and headed towards your bedroom. you grabbed your clothes and headed into the bathroom to freshen up and change into them, giving up your bedroom to have gojo change.

after finishing up, you walked back into your room, seeing gojo already inside your bed; looking like he was half dead. you snorted, walking over to the other side before placing yourself on the empty spot.

"don't hog the blanket, or else i'll kill you."

"no promises."

with that being said, you scooted closer to gojo, in need of feeling his body's warmth against you. it wasn't anything new, this was sort of a tradition you guys did after finals week was over. you both slept for hours together.

you threw your legs over his waist, tugging onto gojo's shirt as he laid down while facing the ceiling.

"hold me, 'toru." you mumbled, your movements slightly bringing him back to life. gojo groaned in annoyance, turning his body to now face you as he wrapped his arm around your waist, pulling you into his chest.

"better?" he spoke into your hair, which was slightly tickling his nose. you nodded your head, your cheek pressed against his chest as you inhaled his scent.

gojo always smelled sweet with a mixture of expensive cologne.

a few minutes passed, and you could hear his heartbeat slowing down, indicating that he was falling asleep.

"hey, you awake?" you poked his cheek, making his eyebrows furrow.

"no." gojo murmured, eyes still closed.

"you know, satoru, if you jerk off before going to sleep then your sleep is gonna be like ten times better. science says it helps release stress and improves blood flow. if you want, i can jerk-"

"go to sleep, y/n." gojo sternly cut you off along with your wonderful visual of how you'd jerk him off, giving your thigh a light smack before resting his hand there. you let out a small whine, playfully biting his cheek.

you saw gojo's eyes scrunch, making you sigh.

"sorry." you mumbled to yourself, as gojo most likely didn't hear you since it seemed like he was already asleep. you pressed a small kiss on the spot you bit before snuggling into his neck. your arms and legs tightly wrapped around his body, fingers finding home between his snowy locks.

"it's okay." was the last thing you heard before you were no longer able to resist sleep.

---

gojo stirred in his sleep, mumbling incoherent words as he felt the constant buzzing noise vibrating on the bed. he painfully opened one eye, half-lidded, as he realized you were still tightly tucked way in his arms. you snored softly against his chest, lips pouted, making him tempted to kiss you.

the snow hair male tried to find the source of the buzzing sound, grabbing a hold of his phone only to see that his phone was dead. gojo's eyebrows furrowed in confusion 'cause then what the hell is it?

his eyes landed on your phone which was shoved under your back and gojo momentarily saw your screen flicker open. bingo! it was your phone that was annoyingly going off.

gojo grabbed your phone, deciding to silence it for you, even though you were passed out like you're dead; so you most likely didn't hear it anyways. but, he was a light sleeper and your stupid phone was keeping him awake.

as the screen flickered open again, gojo saw that you had well over a thousand notifications. his eyes widened, you were never the type to be social. of course, you weren't a loner or something of that sort; you had friends whom were also gojo's friends.

but, the both of you kept your friend groups small and restricted so avoid any unnecessary drama.

"tumblr?" gojo mumbled under his breath, knowing that it wasn't his place to snoop around. but, he couldn't help but feel a little jealous. the notifications were all indicating that people hearted a post you made along with commenting hearts and all that shit.

a weird feeling bubbled inside him, something in between the lines of possessiveness and anger.

so, he decided to investigate, knowing that it was wrong but he couldn't help himself. it was convenient that his face id was added onto your phone, just like how yours was added onto his. after unlocking your phone, he found the tumblr app.

at first, gojo thought it was a dating website as it sounded very familiar to tinder. but, he would soon be proven wrong as he saw a feed full of different blogs and writing.

gojo's curiosity ran wild, silently exploring the new waters he was introduced to. he clicked on your notifications list which was flooded with heart and comments.

not any comments, but horrendously down bad thirsty comments.

sanemiswh0re: ahhh author!! i'm literally running laps, this was so good!

localbbg: this was pure filth and i loved every word of it!

cherrytones: hello?? i need a toru in my life! a tear just ran down my thigh.

yourhotgf: bro wtf, white haired men 🔛🔝 of me!! toru with that big dick energy?? lord, i need him in me so bad.

gojo's eyes widened at the comments while he scrolled. toru? it's a silly little nickname you've been calling him ever since you were kids. since when did you write stories? and... they were about him too?

he clicked on one of the comments which led him to said story, making him smirk as the naughty photo used in the border was enough to give him an idea. gojo settled in bed comfortable, with you still wrapped around him, without a fucking clue of what that menace just found.

"jesus.." gojo breathed out in shock, reading the pure filth you wrote of him and the 'y/n' used in the story, but he assumed that she was based off of you. it was no use denying it, the male character toru resembled too much of his personality and the female character y/n resembled you a lot too.

he wasn't even halfway done yet, but it seemed like you wrote an entire hour long porn script. your writing was so descriptive, describing the sex scenes in such a pornographic yet sensual way. gojo would be lying if he said it didn't make his heart flutter and cock throb.

were your fantasies of him always this dirty?

did you always want to be manhandled by him? praised and teased? being slutted out? a mix of a gentle dom that was a little witty?

god, where did you hide all of this?

of course, you were never ashamed of your vulgar comments and jokes that you threw at him. but, gojo always brushed them off because he grew accustomed to it. however, this was completely new to him.

your smutty writing of him and you made him feel hot and bothered. he knew you were dirty, but not this dirty.

you began to wiggle in his arms, stirring awake as you made a few groaning sounds.

"hmm, time... toru." you groggily asked, eyes still shut as you waited for a response.

"it's 8:23." gojo replied, still not bothered to place your phone back to where he found it. instead, he continued to surf through your dashboard to which he found more of these smut of him.

"why are you awake so soon?" you yawned, cracking an eye open only to wince from the sudden light exposure.

"had a leg cramp." he lied, making you grimace.

"ouch, you should've waken me up then." you commented, your hand find his as you played with his really long and thick fingers. it was a habit to toy around with the rings that wrapped around them.

"you looked too peaceful to disturb. besides, i found something to read in order to kill time." gojo boldly said, making you hum in amusement.

"oh? and since when have you been a bookworm? please, do enlighten me." you teased, making him chuckle. a smirk etched onto his lips, trying to collect his words before attempting to send you into cardiac arrest.

"it's actually very interesting, i have to say. i never thought i'd be into erotic romance." he started out, and the very unexpected words leaving his mouth made your heart pound inside your chest.

he was reading that shit besides you and you had no clue?

"jeez, and you call me a horny dog?" you scoffed.

"well, maybe it's torusluvr who's the real horny dog." he dropped the bomb, making your heart stop it's usual cardiac rhythm as you heard your tumblr account's username. you shot awake from bed, eyes meeting his playful ones as the color drained from you face.

"what? how did you-" you were a stammering and confusing mess, searching for your phone until you looked at his hand.

"looking for this?" gojo waved your phone, the screen on full blast lighting and filled with words of nothing but sex.

"give me my phone back, satoru." you panicked, trying to grab your phone from his grasp. but, gojo's body structure was stronger, bulkier and taller than yours; so you struggled.

however, gojo took your struggle as a form of amusement. he noticed how your face was covered in a blush from being caught red-handed, movements so shaky and alarmed.

it was kind of cute.

"nuh uh." gojo suddenly tossed your phone to the side before grabbing both of your hands. a yelp escaped from your lips as you were pinned to the bed in mere seconds, gojo's body hovering above yours as he slotted himself between your legs.

you gulped nervously, your cheeks growing warmer as it suddenly felt too embarrassing to look at gojo in the eyes. you were a mere ant compared to his body, his stature standing at six feet four inches, and his body was beefy as hell yet so soft to the touch.

"does this turn you on, y/n? hm? being manhandled by someone who's twice your size." the white haired male teased, his husky voice due to his previous slumber sent heat waves to your cunt.

"satoru-"

your words were cut short as gojo leaned closer to you, grinding his hard on against your throbbing cunt, making you gasp.

"satoru? what happened to toru?" he whispered, shoving his face into the crook of your neck, taking a minute to inhale the scent of your perfume which has been permanently engraved into his senses and brain.

"stop joking around, we're friends... best friends." you tried to reason, watching his eyes darken.

"oh? and do all best friends write porn worthy shit about each other?" gojo snickered, pressing soft kisses along your jaw. your throat went dry, words getting stuck.

"i guess we can't be best friends anymore 'cause i wanna recreate all that shit that i read— with you." a smirk tugged on his lips and before you could even process what the hell was about to go down, you let out a small whimper after feeling him bite down on your collarbone before peppering soft kisses on the abused skin afterwards.

"toru... please." you desperately begged, needing some kind of friction between you and him to relieve the ache between your thighs.

"i bet if i touch that cute little pussy of yours, my fingers are gonna come out glossy wet, yeah? should we test it out, y/n?" gojo continued to pester you with his teasing remarks, making you blush further at them as you were to embarrassed to have him find out about the wet patch that was created on your panties by now.

you shyly nodded but this wasn't enough for gojo to take for an answer. you felt a small pinch on the plush flesh of your thigh, making you wince.

"use your words, y/n. you didn't shy out when you were right all that stuff about me and you." he scoffed, making you whine in embarrassment.

"touch me, toru... i need to feel your fingers." your voice was meek, throat getting dry as you desperately bucked your hips upwards. gojo cocked an eyebrow, watching your body squirm underneath him in amusement.

"so needy." gojo laughed, rubbing your thighs before giving it a small squeeze. your body grew warm and your face flushed red from his touch. you've fantasized about this moment for so long and now it was finally happening.

gojo's fingers hooked on the waistband of your shorts about to pull them down until your hand came down to stop his movement. he was a little confused and felt a little guilty because he didn't know if he was moving too fast for you or made you uncomfortable.

"you okay?" gojo asked with genuine concern washed on his face. you bit down on your lips, averting your gaze from his.

"i'm not wearing any lace and my panties aren't even matching with my bra." you said in a little panicked voice. gojo was a handsome jerk and this most definitely wasn't his first time sleeping with someone.

you saw his hookups, they were always the prettiest of the prettiest girls. they looked like polished gems, wearing fancy feminine clothes in contrast with your hobo looking outfits, hair and nails were always done... they were like runway models.

you couldn't help but feel a little insecure. you knew that satoru was different, but that small part of you still felt like perhaps this was still some kind of cruel joke the universe was playing on you.

the books you read always gave the female lead a perfect body free of blemishes, wearing expensive and sexy matching undergarments and so much more.

while here you are with unmatched undergarments, a completely inexperienced virgin who only knew how to shamelessly masturbate to find relief while fantasizing about her best friend.

"hm? so what? they're coming off anyways, princess." gojo reasurred you with a soft smile, leaning in to press a soft kiss on your lips. without hesitation, you wrapped your arms around his neck, indulging in the sweet taste of his lips. he used the strawberry carmex lipbalm religiously.

the kiss was slightly messy, as you were still a little inexperienced in this area as well. you can't remember the last time you last made out with someone, so your teeth clashed with his here and there. but, gojo never complained, he drank in your mistakes and guided you with the fluid movement of his lips and tongue.

the white haired male gave your bottom lip a gentle bite, one of his hands grabbing your jaw to keep your head in place while his other hand pulled down your shorts. gojo threw the annoying article of clothing on the floor, pulling away as a string of saliva connected the both of you.

he looked down and if it was possible to get any harder than how hard he was right now, gojo thought he might've exploded already. you laid under him like a pretty gem, face flushed and your lips swollen as you panted a little from the breathless kiss. a small grin tugged on his lips, the hand grabbing onto your jaw now coming to stroke your cheek.

"just relax for me, princess. let me show you just how much better reality is than your little stories." gojo whispered, leaving open mouthed kisses on your jaw that were leading south until he was peppering kisses on your neck.

you decided to take a leap and pull your t-shirt off, catching gojo off-guard by your sudden eagerness. a genuine smile was forming on his lips at how adorable you looked. your cotton panties had a strawberry pattern on it with a tiny pink bow on the front and your bra was a solid blue color; both of which satoru is well familiar with as the two of you did your laundry together.

"stop staring." you embarrassingly pouted, making him let a raspy chuckle escape his lips.

"can't help it when my best friend is this cute." he teased, pinching your cheek which made you yelp.

"shut up and go back to what you were doing." you nagged, making him cock an eyebrow.

"oh? eager are we?" gojo hummed, skillful fingers whisking your bra off in a matter of seconds, your tits spilling out of the cups that held them. you averted your gaze from him after seeing how gojo's eyes widened, feeling your face grow hotter by the second.

"look at me, y/n."

"no."

"look at me."

"eat my ass."

"i will."

"satoru!" you gasped, finally looking at him as his response caught your attention. however, gojo didn't pay too much mind to it as brought a hand down to fondle your tits, watching how you bit your lips at the sudden squeeze.

"don't look away from me, baby. you're such a pretty girl, so let me admire you for a bit, yeah?" with that being said, gojo latched his lips onto on of your nipples, making you whimper.

"shit.." you moaned, feeling the tip of his tongue flicking the sensitive swollen bud. he peered up to meet your eyes, looking so fucking pretty even with a mouthful of your tits. his stupidly charming blue eyes staring into your half-lidded eyes. you brought to stroke his cheek as he continued to suckle on your nipple.

"pretty boy." you cooed, feeling his hand kneed the plush flesh of your thighs before giving it a little spank, making you squeal. being the tease he is, he gave your nipple a gentle bite before releasing the bud with a 'pop' sound.

"you wore my favorite panties." gojo complimented, making you scoff.

"stop saying that to make me feel better about my mix-matched undergarments." you rolled your eyes.

"you could think that my words are lies but it still won't change the fact that i jerked off with those same panties." he shamelessly shrugged after revealing such a dirty secret, making your mouth gape open.

"huh?!" you were at a loss for words, but, for some reason it made your pussy throb at the thought of your hot best friend masturbating to the thought of you.

even if he used your panties.

"mhm... now, let's put them to some use again." gojo pulled down his shorts along with his boxers, completely disposing them to the floor to meet with the rest of your clothes.

your eyes shamelessly came in contact with his cock and you couldn't help but harshly gulp. gojo was fucking hung, not lacking in any area. his dick had to be at least a good seven or eight inches long, a single vein running on the side of the shaft, with a pretty blush pink tip that was angrily leaking with precum.

"feel a little overwhelmed, princess?" gojo sensed your shock, and you truthfully nodded.

"y-yeah... i never-"

"wait, you're still a virgin, y/n?" he genuinely asked and you thinned your lips before nodding. gojo gasped, slapping a hand on his mouth.

"what the fuck? and you wrote all of that with no experience??" gojo was truly amazed as you shyed away from his eyes.

"it's okay if you don't wanna, you know." your throat went dry, a little disappointed that it would end this way.

"fuck you? of course i wanna fuck you, princess. but, are you sure you're okay with me taking your virginity? we could stop and forget about it if you want to, no pressure." he asked in a soft tone, rubbing your hips in a comforting way.

"yeah, i want you to take it, toru. i trust you." you gave him a girlish smile, making his heart jump.

"okay then. i'm gonna prep you real good to make sure it doesn't hurt as much." gojo pressed a tender kiss on your lips. he stroked his cock a few times as a husky groan left his lips, making him sound so sexy.

gojo hooked two fingers to the side of your panties and lifted them up before sliding his cock inside the fabric. you moaned at the feeling of his warm and hard cock sliding past your folds, his wet tip nudging and coating your clit with his precum.

"fuck. you're so wet, baby." gojo breathed out, leaning down to suck on your tits as he continued to thurst his hips back and forth between your folds. your juices lubricated his cock and the stimulation provided to your clit with every nudge of his tip made your eyes roll back.

"oh my god... just like that, toru. please!" you begged, your hand finding purchase to his snowy locks as you pushed his face further to your tits, as he licked and sucked your nipples. gojo's hips never faltered, continuing to glide his thick dick between your slit, feeling your clit throb.

you felt your orgasm building up, making your breath hitch as you whimpered. after a few more thrusts, you gushed on top of his cock as gojo cummed on your pussy, messily spreading both of your juices on your cunt.

gojo pulled his cock out of your panties, seeing how there's a wet patch on the front of your panties. he used his index finger to outline and rub your clit, making you shake from the overstimulation.

"w-wait." you tried to catch your breath but gojo wasn't gonna let you rest until you cummed on his tongue and fingers.

"nope, gotta stretch you out now, princess." he pinched your clit, making your thighs shut close from the sudden impact.

"you little shit." you threw him a playful glare, to which he only stuck his tongue out and use his strong hands to pry your legs open. this time, gojo wasn't going to be so patient. he pulled your panties down and threw them somewhere, his cerulean eyes fixated on your cunt.

"fucking hell." gojo swore under his breath and you couldn't help but think negatively.

"what's wrong?" you asked a little worried.

"i'm trying to hard to not cum again from just looking at this pretty pussy of yours." he groaned, using his thumbs to spread your lips apart, watching how it glistened with both your and his cum from the previous pantie fucking session.

you supported yourself on your elbow as your other free hand pulled his head forward, crashing your lips onto his. you kissed him with need, sucking on his bottom lip before giving it a bite. gojo began to slide his middle finger between your wet folds, making sure to rub your clit at a fast pace.

you moaned into his mouth, which gojo happily drank as he continued to give the neglected bud some attention. his finger stopped at your hole, experimentally shoving it in a little bit. you winced at the sudden intrusion as gojo's fingers were longer and thicker than yours.

"shh.. it's okay." gojo assured, pecking your lips as he entered his finger. your walls clamped down on his finger and gojo couldn't help but groan at how fucking tight you were.

"shit, gonna have to stretch you out quite a bit if this sweet pussy of yours is gonna take my cock. don't wanna rip you apart, baby." gojo chuckled, kissing your cheek before sliding his body down until his face was directly above your wet aching cunt.

gojo licked a fat stripe up your cunt, eyes rolling back at the taste of your pussy. you tasted so fucking good and he knew he'd get addicted. he slurped up all your juices, his tongue circling your clit before flicking it. you gripped onto his hair, pulling his mouth closer to your needy pussy as you basically humped his face.

gojo decided to add in another finger and a guttural moan escaped your throat, feeling him scissoring in the two thick digits in and out of your hole. your legs began to shake at the amount of pleasure you were getting from being tongue and finger fucked at the same time.

"fuck! augh~ i-i'm gonna c-cum!" you moaned as you felt the knot on your lower stomach tighten, your hole enclosing around his fingers as you creamed on gojo's fingers.

"that's it, there you go, princess." gojo praised, drinking up all your cum and licking you clean. your breathing was irregular as you were trying to calm down your erratic heartbeat.

gojo looked up at you with a slutty expression, his lips glossy with his own spit and your cum along with his chin dripping with your arousal.

"think you ready for me, baby?" he teased, placing a playful kiss on your clit before slotting himself between your legs. gojo's hard cock rest on your inner thigh, his eyes giving you a glimmer full of tease and play.

"i think that if you don't put your dick inside me within the next minute i'll kill myself." you dramatically responded, clearly not in the right state of mind due to pleasure fogging up your mind. gojo laughed at your words, leaning in to kiss you.

you could taste yourself on your tongue, but that did not bother you as much as having your throbbing hole empty.

"toruuu~ pleaseee." you whined, bucking your hip up to his in an attempt to get some friction to relieve the ache between your legs.

"my pretty girl needs something, hm?" he continued his banter, making you pout. you trailed your hand down and grabbed his cock, giving it a few pumps and watched your best friend crumble from your touch.

"need your cock inside me, toru." you said in a sultry voice, using the tip of dick to rub up and down your slit, parting your folds. gojo decided to stop being mean and help you, grabbing the base of his thick cock and rubbing it on your dripping wet cunt.

his tip now rested on top of your hole, his eyes looking up at you for further movement. you nodded your head, hands going to the side to grab the sheets.

"it's gonna really hurt bad for a minute but i promise it'll get better. i'll go slow and gentle, 'kay?" gojo offered you a soft smile as reassurance, to which you nodded, fully trusting him to take care of you.

"can you come closer." you asked in a meek voice, and gojo nodded as he leaned forwards so that you could wrap your arm around his neck.

gojo pushed in the fat bulbous tip of his cock, the stretch of something fatter and bigger than his and your fingers immediately burned.

you winced in pain, making him apologize and you told him that it was okay. gojo stayed like that for a little before thrusting the tip of his dick in and out of you to help you get a little used to the intrusion. it took every fiber of his body to have enough self-control to not shove the entire length of his cock inside your cunt and use it like his personal cocksleeve.

"look at me, y/n." he breathed out, making you open your eyes as your eyes were a little glossy. gojo never fucked a virgin before, and you were his best friend, so he wanted to be extra careful to not hurt you.

"i'm sorry." gojo quickly blurted out and you were confused for a quick minute, until you let out a pained cry as he shoved his entire cock inside your pussy inch by inch. he quickly latched his lips onto yours, swallowing your cries as his thumb came down to play with your clit.

your nails dug into his flesh, tears streaming down your face as the stretch of his cock was so painful.

"hurts so much, toru." you sniffled, mumbling your words on his lips.

"it would've hurt more if i went inch by inch slowly. you'll be okay, baby, trust me." with that being said, gojo slid his cock fully out, your pussy missing the feeling of being full. you mewled at the loss of contact, until he slammed his hips back into you, shoving his cock in one go.

within each slow thrust that he gave you, the pain faded away and you were soon drowning in pleasure. your cunt clamped down on his cock, the delicious feeling of the vein on his cock grazing against your wet walls made your eyes roll back.

"such a sweet pussy, fuck you're so tight." he grunted, grabbing your hips in place as his pace was unforgiving. his cock curved and kissed every inch inside your cunt, making you grip the sheets for dear life.

"satoru! i- fuck. wait, it's too much!" you cried out, your vision becoming blurry and you couldn't tell if it was from the tears that were forming due to overstimulation or from exhaustion.

maybe both.

"you could take it, princess. this pussy was fucking made for my cock." gojo moaned, grabbing the back of your knees before pushing them back to your head; placing you in a mating press.

this new angle gave him a better view of your tits bouncing with every thrust along with every ripple of your ass that came in contact with his heavy balls. your free hand came down to play with your clit as the other hand grabbed the back of his head to give him a sloppy kiss.

"feels so good, toru." you slurred, as his cock continued to kiss your cervix, bullying it's way in and out of your aching hole.

"gonna fuck you so dumb, till you become mine." he grinned against your skin, biting down as he placed a slap on your pussy, making you let out a cry.

"please, please, please! i-i'm gonna cum!" you stuttered out, feeling his balls hit against your ass while he continued to fuck your hole. your cunt began to convulse around his cock.

with another thrust, another rub on your clit and a gentle kiss on the side of your neck, you let out the most desperate and needy moan known to mankind as you began to cum around his cock.

gojo began to chase his own high, satisfied with the ring of white cream forming at the base of his cock, fucking you into over stimulation.

"f-fuck, gonna cum. god, i-i love you, y/n." he choked on his words, fingers clawing onto your hips as he gave you one final thrust before release thick wads of hot cum inside your hole.

gojo fell on top of your body with his arms supporting him a little to make sure he doesn't crush you with his weight, cock still lodged inside your wet cunt that was now filled with both his and your cum.

"i... fuck, i love you too, satoru." you whispered, swallowing thickly from how dry your throat was. you stroked his snowy white hair, the both of you breathing heavily as gojo continued to lazily fuck his cum into you.

"you know, i didn't expect you to be a virgin from how horny you are." gojo giggled, making you hum. he rested his head on your chest, playfully taking your nipple in his mouth as he sucked on it.

"well, i guess i got the real life experience now." you gave him a cheeky smile, leaning down to kiss his cheek.

"better than your little books?" his voice was a little muffled due to having a mouthful of your boobs in his mouth.

"mhm, i should write about it." you thought out loud, catching his attention.

"if you have writers block anytime else, just let me know and i'll help you. that's the least i could do for my dear girlfriend." gojo smirked, making you blush at the last word.

"oh? and since when have you declared that you're my boyfriend?" you joked, making him bite your nipple.

"since forever. you're mine now anyways." he pouted like a child, making you laugh.

"fine, so are you finally gonna let me stack donuts on top of it?" you said, making him look at you with a look of disbelief.

"maybe."

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whorerificstuff · 1 year

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What if you and this male character had an argument or maybe they were just stressed or he was already pissed off and you manage to mess up a bit so he let out his frustrations on you. Words that he didn't mean spew out of his mouth till he said the words he didn't mean the most.

"I wish you would just disappear"

You were hurt well hurt was an understatement. It was the last thing you wish to hear from your husband's mouth. So you left not taking anything with you. You weren't angry you were hurt, you weren't the type to slam the door shut. The last thing you told him was a soft "I'm sorry" as you closed the door softly. He never bothered to chase after you. He just went to your shared bedroom and slept expecting for you to come back, sleep next to him and the two of would reconcile tomorrow.

But that never came he woke up without you next to him. The home you shared feels off, feels eerie then he realised all your belongings are no where to be seen. He panicked and dialled your number but it was someone else who answered the call. His heart was thumping fast thinking you left him for good while he was sleeping and took everything with you. He asked your friends but they didn't know who you were even went to the house where your parents lived but it was owned by someone else too. He was confused, he thinks he was going insane, he thought he was being pranked, pranked by the cruelest joke. It was like you disappeared from this world, that you never existed. That thought dawned on him, those last words he told you, the shock and hurt in your eyes as he said those god awful words, that he wished for you to disappear. He refused to believe you disappeared. You couldn't have, you married him, the both of you exchanged rings.

He looked at his ring finger, and froze, the band that signifies your union and promise to each other was not there but he never took it off, he never did. He was sure you're real, he IS sure everything he had done with you IS real but why aren't they there? why aren't you there?. He wanted to make sense to everything, anything that could've led to your disappearance, why everyone you know were confused who you were. He couldn't help but feel defeated and cry on your shared/his bed. How can a lie be the truth. It was all a lie, every hurtful things he said to you were just in the heat of the moment, he didn't mind your shortcomings like how you are to him. He wants you back, heck he'll even pray and beg to God to give you back, to grovel at Gods feet to give everything back to him. He'll do anything just to give you back to him.

Imma stop right here

Idk why I wrote this but feel free to use it ig???

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brodieland · 2 months

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.˚ 𓈒 ࣪.𝝑𝝔 Can we finally call a Truce? ´ˎ˗

Percy Jackson x Fem!Hades!Reader Synopsis: The two were sworn enemies like three days ago, now what are they doing ??? Warning(s): some swearing Word Count: 2728

╰➤ MASTERLIST pt3

When you woke up, you didn't recognize the room at first. You went to sit up when you noticed something weighing you down. You looked down and saw an arm holding you by the waist. 'Oh my gods', you thought when you realized it was Percy holding you close. You leaned over to the nightstand and grabbed your phone to check the time.

[9:32] AM

As you saw the time, and started to freak out. "PERCY" you turned over and shouted. You did your best to shake Percy awake. That only caused him to yawn and move in even closer. 'Why NOW.' You continued to shake him till you threw him off the bed.

"OW, what the hell Y/N" Percy shouted.

"Percy, we have class together today! And it starts in twenty minutes" you yelled upset.

"Shit" Percy said as he stood up and quickly grabbed some clothes to change.

"Percy, can I borrow some clothes. I don't think I can go out like this" you rambled off as you looked down at what you were wearing. A pair of shorts and a sports bra.

Percy looked at you up and down before saying, "yeah um, for sure. Grab whatever you want" then walked out the room. And you did. You grabbed a pair of baggy jeans and a hoodie. After you finished changing you ran out to find Percy waiting for you.

"Thanks for waiting" you said rushing toward him.

"No problem." You two were now running to try and make on time. Sadly, since you guys had to swing by your place to grab your bag, you guys were about two minutes late. You both ran in during attendance, absolutely winded and out of breathe from running all the way there. After apologizing for being late, you took your seat next to Annabeth, whose eyes were so wide they might pop out, and Percy took his seat in front of you.

40 minutes go bye and suddenly a paper hits your desk. It was a note from Annabeth. 'why did u come in late w/ Percy????? did something happen ur not telling me???'

You then wrote on the other side of the note, 'you can wait 20 minutes ;3.' You drew a penis before you slid the note back. This earned you an angry glare, but she accepted it.

Finally, class ended. But now you have to explain to Annabeth. After you both made sure you were out of earshot from Percy, Annabeth started asking questions.

"Why were you late with Percy, and what the HADES, are you wearing" Annabeth said really fast. Breathe girl.

"So um, last night I couldn't sleep. So, I texted Percy if he was up so I can come over, and he was up, so I went over. Anyways so I got there and we were just hanging out and talking till it got late. And since I was really tired Percy let me sleep over so.. yeah, that's all that happened." You finished explaining.

"Hm, okay if that's what you say, but why are you wearing Percy's clothes. And don't even deny it because I KNOW your closet" Annabeth said while sticking her fingers in the air.

"I cant come to class in shorts and a sports bra now can I?" you questioned sarcastically.

"I wouldn't mind" Silena snuck up from behind the two of you, causing you both to jump.

"Gods you scared me" you said.

"OH MY GODS SILENA YOUR HERE" Annabeth screamed.

"Please tell me your going to explain Y/N's choice of clothes" Silena eyed you up and down with a raised eyebrow.

"I slept at Percy's dorm. Nothing happened so you both can calm yourselves" you stated.

"Nothing happened but you went over in basically nothing, now tell me where exactly you slept" Annabeth question. You know she kind of had you with that. You went silent for a little bit, making the two girls in front of you smile, knowing the answer.

"So his bed" Silena and Annabeth said in unison.

"I HAVE A PAPER TO TURN IN, GOODBYE" you shouted as you left the scene. The pair were cackling behind you as you almost tripped on the jeans that were a little to long for you. You made it to class and turned in your paper then took a seat. Class starts and its horrendously boring. Halfway through class, you get a text from Nico.

'DID YOU AT LEAST LISTEN TO ME'

What?? You texted him back.

'What are you talking about??'

A minute goes by and he responds.

'when I said be safe of course'

THIS GUYYYY.

'im gonna fight you, I did nothing of the sort'

"Ms. Y/L/N, is there a reason you are on your phone as I lecture" your teacher asked.

"Um, no. Sorry sir" you apologized.

"Please go spend the rest of class in library." Bro, again?? Twice in three days? You didn't argue as you packed up your things and left. As you walked toward the library, you passed by Percy's class and looked through the window on the door. You saw Percy and he looked so bored it was funny. You thought you'd be the amazing friend you are and get him out.

You walked into the class and spoke up. "Excuse me Mrs. Ariti, Mr. Gabris is asking to see Percy" you made eye contact with Percy as you said that. He was trying not to laugh as you blatantly lied.

"Of course, Mr. Jackson you're excused." And with that Percy and you rushed out of class.

"Nice going Y/N, gods that class was literally rotting my brain" Percy shook his head while talking.

"Consider me your night in shining armor" you pointed to yourself with your thumbs. Percy just smiled at you.

"Yeah, yeah whatever you say." You both started walking around campus talking like normal. You notice Percy keeps looking at you, or looking your body.

"Like what you see Jackson, you want a picture to go with it" you joked. You could've sworn his face got warm.

"You look good with my clothes on" Percy said. Now you went a little warm. That was just really bold of him. "Aw is someone a little nervous" Percy teased.

"Nervous? Never, who are you" you turned away.

"Never she says, whatever floats your boat" Percy said. "If you're gonna treat me like this then you can give me my clothes back." Percy pulled your back toward his chest as he jokingly pulled at your/his hoodie.

"Excuse why you trying to get me naked right now" You yelled. Percy rushed him arm from behind you and slapped it on your mouth to shut up. This caused you to laugh and whip around. You didn't realize how close the both of you were until now. You two were barely inches apart with your hands on his chest and his over your shoulders.

"Hey" you whispered.

"Hey" he whispered back.

That's when you noticed something, he was staring at your lips. You'd be lying to yourself if you said you didn't think Percy was hot. You always did, he was just an annoying little shitter. But hey, you both were past that now. So, fuck it. You both started to lean in until..

'RING'

The bell rang, scaring the both of you. You both stepped away from each other. There was an awkwardness hanging in the air. No one said anything for a few moments. Thankfully, Percy spoke up.

"So." And that was it. What a way with words.

"Soo" you repeated.

"Would you want to hang out at my place later or" Percy said, he seemed a little shy and you found that funny.

"For sure" you smiled as you look up at him. You could Annabeth and Silena appear from the distance. "I'll see you then okay, bye Percy" you waved him off and he did the same.

"Hey guys" you said as you approached your friends.

"Hey Y/N, sorry to pull you away from your boyfriend" Silena said. You laughed.

"He's not my boyfriend, lets just go eat" you said. You guys made your way to get some food and sat next to each other like always. Silena and Annabeth were talking about who knows what while you sat their not saying anything and zoning out. You were busy thinking about, someone you didn't want to admit, Percy. What would have happened if the bell didn't ring. What'll happen when you go to to his dorm later. You were so deep in thought you didn't realize that the two girls in front of you have been calling your name.

"Y/N" Annabeth yelled as she threw a piece of bread at you, landing straight on your face.

"HEADSHOT" Silena exclaimed, throwing her arms in the air. You grabbed the bread and took an angry bite from it.

"Was that necessary" you said. They both nodded. "What did you need?"

"We need to know why your so quiet, and if we interrupted anything earlier" Silena asked.

"I mean, you didn't interrupt anything" you said with emphasize on the word 'you.' "The bell did though."

"What does that mean" Annabeth asked.

"It means I'm going to his place later" you said. Your friends just turned to each other and smirked. They side-eyed you as they did. "What?"

"Nothing" Annabeth said.

"Have fun on your date" Silena said. You rolled your eyes.

"Haha" you deadpanned. "its not a date. I'm gonna go now though, bye guys." As everyone said their goodbyes, you head back to your dorm. When you got there, you decided to bother Nico.

"Hey Nico." You slammed the door open to see Nico doing.. homework?

"I'm doing homework" Nico said like it was a normal thing I've seen him do.

"This is literally the first time I've ever seen you do homework" you stated as you jumped on his bed.

"You're a funny one aren't you" Nico said as he shut his laptop.

"Oh you were just waiting for a distraction weren't you" you both started laughing.

"Did you come in here just to bother me orr" Nico asked.

"Perhaps" you said smiling. "You know you love me."

"Yeah yeah sure. Anyways, what is that" Nico asked pointing to your outfit.

"Why is everyone so invested with my clothes holy shit" you shoved your head into a pillow. Nico just laughed at you.

"I'm just messing with you jeez. Are you hanging out with him again today." Why does he know me so well.

"Yeah I am actually" you said. "I almost kissed him" you admitted. You looked over to see Nico not even giving you a reaction. "Are you not gonna say anything? Not even a single emotion?"

"You say it like its a shocker anymore" Nico said. "Why didn't you?"

"The bell rang. Then it got awkward, but its fine" you said. You wondered if he was a good kisser. Then you got a text from Percy.

'I want a rematch from our hippocampi races'

You laughed at the message before replying.

'The fact you lost and these are literally your creatures is actually INSANEE. Your on though'

You jumped up from Nico's bed and saw him getting back to his homework. "Nico I'm gonna go now. Love you, bye."

"Love you too Y/N" Nico said, without looking up from his screen.

You ran into your room to put on a black bikini and just put Percy's clothes back on before heading over to his place. You walked up to his door and started banging on it like you were going to punch a hole through the door. Percy swung the door open.

"Are you being chased or something" He asked shocked.

"No, I just wanted to alert you of my presence" you said sweetly as you stepped inside.

"You alerted the whole campus of your presence, but okay" Percy said. "You ready to get destroyed?"

You looked at him with a smirk. "No your weird, you can go now" you both were bent over laughing now.

"Okay, okay lets go, and no I won't be getting destroyed" you said, air quotes on 'destroyed.' You guys made your way out to the beach and got into your bathing suits. When you got in and the water was at your shoulders, Percy did it again. Grabbed you close, this time felt different though. You didn't get a chance to think about it before Percy zoomed you both into deep water and called the hippocampi.

After you both mounted on, you guys started racing, with you winning again. At the last race, the sun started going down and your hippocampi was slowing down.

"She's starting to get tired." Percy said. "We're really far from shore, hop on mine." And you did. You sat right behind Percy and wrapped your arms around his waist, holding him close so you didn't fall off. All you could think about was the skin on skin contact between the two of you. Suddenly Percy turned around, making sure to hold on to you by your waist so you don't slip.

"Hey" he said.

"Hey" you returned.

You guys were just staring at each other. You were thinking about earlier, he seemed willingly to kiss you then. Would he still want to now? You caught yourself staring at his lips when he just leaned in and kissed you. You were kissing him back. And yeah, he was a good kisser, great one even. You started sliding closer, wrapping your legs around him with your arms around his neck. He was wrapping his arms tightly around your waist. You guys kept making out until you were out of breathe.

"I can't believe it" Percy smiled down at you.

"What" you laughed out.

"Just three days ago you were shouting at me in the middle of class about how much you wanted me dead. And here you now, making out with me" Percy teased. You playfully slapped his chest.

"I think I was hacked. Nico possessed me in my sleep" you joked.

"Oh really?" Percy was now jokingly trying to push you off. "How much do you mean that?" You were almost off the hippocampi and in the water.

"I don't mean it! Pull me back up" you shouted. And he did. You guys were quiet for a little bit. This time the silence wasn't uncomfortable.

"So what now?" Percy spoke up, you knew what he meant.

"I don't know" you admitted honestly. Its quiet again for a little bit.

"One date" Percy said. You looked up at him.

"What" you asked. Woah, he actually wanted to take you out?

"One actual date, something I should've taken you out on before the beef started" Percy said. Since before? You thought about it.

"Sure, one date" you were smiling now.

"Perfect" Percy agreed. You both now reached the shore and walked to grab your clothes.

"You want your clothes back" you asked.

"So you could walk back wearing that?" He pointed to your bathing suit. "Just give it back another day." You both got dressed, and Percy decided to be a gentleman and walk you back, like he did last time.

You reached back to your dorms. "Goodnight Percy."

"Goodnight Y/N" Percy said as he pulled back your hair and tucked it behind your ear. He rested his hand by your jaw. You decided to lean in and kiss him goodnight. This kiss last a little longer than a little peck. And of course, just like last time, Nico slammed the door open. Causing you both to jump apart.

"Hey guys" Nico greeted. You sighed.

"Goodnight Percy" you said as you walked past Nico.

"Goodnight Y/N" Percy turned to Nico. "And goodnight Nico."

"Goodnight" Nico said in a jokingly sweet voice. He was dying not to laugh. He shut the door and turned to you. "We're just friends" he said in a girly high-pitched voice, imitating you.

"We technically still are" you said quietly. There was silence before you spoke up again. "We're going on a date tomorrow."

"Finally oh my gods. The world is moving forward" Nico said. He is soo dramatic.

"Okay drama king, I'm gonna go shower now" you waved Nico off.

Wow. You and Percy had a date tomorrow.

..............................................................................................................................Pt. 4?? 😱

#percy jackon and the olympians #percy jackson #percy jackson pjo #percy pjo #percy series #percy jackson x reader #percy jackson x y/n #percy jackson x you #percy jackson fluff #annabeth chase #annabeth pjo #silena beauregard #silena pjo #nico di angelo

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justlemmeadoreyou · 8 months

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Waiting^

sorry this is shit, i am just sad and wrote this. the ending sucks, I know. might do a part 2

. . .

You were excited. Excited was a small word to describe what you were feeling. Thrilled, maybe?

Today was you and Harry’s 6 month anniversary. And it’s not as big as it sounds, but it was for you. It was the longest relationship you’d been in, without getting your heart broken or thrown away.

You were excited, and so was Harry. He woke you up with his raspy voice, and an overload of kisses, that made your cheeks turn red from the utter adoration you felt for him in that moment. You couldn’t believe your surroundings at that moment. Being so much in love, it almost hurt.

You both cuddled, till one of you had to break away so that you both could leave for work, or you would have ended up lying there till the afternoon or so.

He had a few interviews today, which he promised to finish up early, so that he could be there at the dot, pulling out the chair for you on your reserved table. At 8 pm.

And now, as you glanced at your phone for what felt like the hundredth time that night. 8:46 pm. No sign of Harry. No call, or even a text.

You felt sad, almost pathetic sitting there and waiting for him. He forgot. Of course he did. He was so busy even when on a break, and had a million things to attend to. A stupid 6-month anniversary dinner was not worth his time.

The waiter gave you an apologetic look as he asked you if you were still waiting or were going to order.

“I think I’ll leave. Thank you.”

You picked up your belongings, your phone and purse, and headed out into the chill air outside. You walked to your car, trying to hold your tears in, atleast till you were inside and had the windows pulled up.

He could’ve just said that he wouldn’t be able to make it, when you had first asked him. Could’ve just said no, instead of standing you up and making you suffer. That would have hurt less.

The tears escaped from the chokehold you’d held them in, flowing through your makeup, and on your red dress, which you had brought specially for this occasion. You had saved up for a few months so you could buy an expensive one, to at least try and curb the difference of him wearing a thousand-dollar suit.

But, it all went down the drain.

You started driving, wiping off the never-stopping tears so you could focus on the road. As you reached the intersection, instead of turning for the road to your shared home, you turned for your old apartment.

It had grown old, and Harry had suggested that you move in somewhere else. You were packing up to do that, and then he asked you to move in with him. You happily agreed.

Maybe that was the issue. You were a pushover, or just an easy game in general. That was why nobody could stand you for even three months.

Turning and parking into the parking complex, you searched for the keys and went upstairs. Opening the door with a bit of effort, you made your way in. It had gotten dirty, but was enough to atleast spend the night in. You would move somewhere else tomorrow.

Making your way to the bedroom, you didn’t even bother turning on the lights. Removing the expensive dress and leaving it on the floor, you jumped on the bed, pulling the sheets to cover yourself.

Your crying had stopped, but you couldn’t stop the repulsive and self-loathing thoughts filling your head. He didn’t forget anything, till today. He even remembered the smallest of the small details, even your college grades. How could he forget this?

Was he done? And he didn’t want anything more to with you anymore? Maybe it was all your fault. You were so talkative and expressive of everything you felt. He got tired and needed breaks. But your stupid self just couldn’t understand, could it?

You weren’t perfect too. You didn’t have a skinny body or long legs like the models he had dated. Didn’t have that beauty, or that money. But, you worked hard and made enough to take care of yourself without depending on your parents or him. Wasn’t that enough?

Maybe that wasn’t for him. Maybe he wanted all he had before, before you. Maybe he wanted to try a mediocre girl before going back to the ones he really wanted to be with. Maybe you were just a rebound for him.

It took a while for you to focus on the sound ringing thoughout your room. It was your phone. A call from Harry.

“Hello”

“Hi” your voice sounded raspy, your throat swollen from all the crying.

“Love, I know I’m super late and I’m really fucking sorry. I just went for a few drinks with the guys and lost track of time. Are you near the restaurant? I’m halfway there-”

“You couldn’t call? Or even text?”

“Sorry. I’m really fucking sorry, it’s just, tha’ I-I completely forgot.” He was swearing a lot, something he did when he was drunk.

“You forgot? After I had been telling you for almost a month. I reminded you in the morning? And why are you driving after drinking? Are you insane?”

“Look, I’m really sorry. I know I messed up. Are you still near the place?”

“No, Harry! I’m not. It’s almost 10 now. The reservation was for 8 pm. And stop talking on the phone while drunk driving. Someone else couldn’t have dropped you?”

“Everyone was drunk, and I left without telling them. Will you just tell me where you are?”

“No, I won’t. Just turn around and go home. It’s just 5 minutes away. Don’t bother about me.”

“What? Why? Look, the signal is on. Just tell me. I’ll be there in a bit.”

“Go home!”

“Why are you bein so mean?”

“Bye, Harry”

. . .

taglist: @freedomfireflies @gurugirl

dm, or send an ask if you want to be added!

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mysticmunson · 1 year

Note

can we have a blurb about reader returning to school and being cornered by jason? 🙃

so funny enough i almost wrote this in the original post but i decided not to last minute so this is perfect. i hope you enjoy this darling! i wrote this in one sitting so just let me know if i fucked something up lol.

tw: language, a/o/b dynamics, unwarranted touching (not assault)

word count: 2.1k

Waking up just as the sun peeked behind the huge oak trees in the yard, you woke to an empty bed for the first time in days, Eddie returning to his place before you both made your return to school.

Nerves had kept you tossing and turning, wondering who knew or who would notice. You felt different, physically and mentally, and when Eddie came back from presenting, most figured it out, although an alpha’s transformation is more drastic visually.

The warmth of your sheets comforted you as you stared at the popcorn ceiling, making shapes from the ridges. The birds outside chirped to each other, rustling by and landing on a branch. Your smile at the peaceful scene was cut short by your alarm clock, jumping out of your skin before slamming it to snooze.

Applying makeup with shaky hands and putting on a blue, cotton dress with sneakers, you tried to regulate your fears before they got the best of you. Grabbing a snack on your way out, you took a long exhale once on the opposing side of your front door, wishing you could hide for a bit longer.

Your stride gained momentum as you neared Hawkins High, grateful to see Robin being dropped off by Steve, rolling her eyes at something he said from the inside of his BMW. She caught your gaze and let a grin spread across her freckled cheeks, signaling you over as Steve drove away.

“Hi Rob, thanks for your help last week.” You said as you approached her, feeling blood flood to your cheeks at your compromised state. She snorted, swinging an arm around your shoulder, her jean jacket rubbing against your bare arm.

“Anytime, just owe me a movie night this week since it didn’t happen on Friday.” She compromised, making you laugh and agree, knowing she didn’t say this with accusation. The tiled halls were bustling with students, not taking much note of who was coming in and out of the doorway.

Thankful for the busyness, you felt a significant weight being lifted from your shoulders, but still kept your eye out for Eddie. He was notoriously late, so you figured it would be awhile till he returned.

Robin rambled about her movie night with Steve and how he hogged the popcorn and burnt it, something you always managed not to do. As she continued her rant, you saw a quick glance of a basketball player whose name you couldn’t recall. He quickly disappeared into the sea of teenagers.

Trying to shake it off, you figured it was awkward eye contact, knowing you usually cowered away with awkwardness yourself at that. You bid goodbye to Robin as you entered your first period, taking a seat at the end of the middle section, attempting to garner as little attention as possible.

As class went on, you could feel sets of eyes lingering longer than usual, blaming it on your heightened nerves and that it would all calm down soon enough. The math equations scribbled in your notebook were barely legible, foot bouncing beneath your metal seat until the first bell rang.

Grabbing your bag, you took one step out the door until a hand grabbed you, yanking you into their chest. While the action startled you, the recognition was instant as you saw his curls, smelled his potent aura, and the lips pressed to your cheek.

“Hey pretty girl.” Eddie greeted, intertwining your fingers as you both descended down the hall. He was in an Ozzy Osbourne tour shirt from ‘84, a pair of black ripped jeans, and bracelets on his wrists with one dangling cross earring in his right ear. You wanted to bite him.

“Hi Eds.” You smiled, quickly wrinkling your nose, “Did you skip first period?” Your question made him scoff, shooting air as if he couldn’t care less. While you did care about his education and making sure he graduated this year, you both knew this past week was eventful to say the least.

Forcing glares to anyone giving less than a smile or not looking at all, Eddie was on high alert with you on his arm, his chest puffing in authoritative nature. He had the urge to stay by you in every class, but knew the teachers would either give him detention or kick him out.

So he dropped you off at every class, racing back when class finished to repeat the action. The only time he didn’t was when they were going to lunch as the cafeteria was right between both rooms, a bit of distance between it.

The fluorescent lights felt more intense as your exhaustion settled, rubbing your upper brow as another scientific theory was explained poorly by the P.E. teacher who was brought in to substitute. As he began to describe Newton’s laws, the bell signaled lunch, your stomach grumbling as if on cue.

Filing in with the array of overly energized underclassmen and chronically stressed upperclassmen, you went in the direction of the lunch room until someone called your name. Walking to the side to fully turn around, you didn’t see anyone looking your way besides for quick glances, making your brows furrow. As soon as your back turned, you heard it again, this time closer until a majority of the students were down the walkway, getting their daily dose of cold meatloaf.

“Well hi there sweetheart.” You heard a chilling voice, not belonging to the one shouting your name previously, only to notice Jason and two of his teammates beside him. Their looks made you feel two feet tall, biting the inside of your lip to avoid crying which made you even more frustrated.

The influx of emotions were too much, if this would’ve happened weeks ago, you’d just walked away with no comment. However, your feet now felt cemented in place as he loomed over you, a few strands of his blonde hair falling out of place.

His friend backed away, continuing a conversation aside from you as Jason smiled, leaning against the lockers beside you. His eyes sparkled with mischievousness, unable to read his direct intentions.

“So a little birdie told me you had a life changing weekend…” He trailed off, his fingers trailing against your elbow, “I could take care of you, would never have to lift a finger or be scared ever again. I would keep you safe.”

Swallowing the lump building in your throat, you could only muster up a whisper, barely recognizing your voice. “Eddie takes care of me.”

This made him chuckle, rolling his eyes as he grabbed your arm lightly, his golden skin warm against your tricep. His rough fingers brushed against your dainty dress, feeling much too thin at the moment, making the tears come to your waterline.

“I could truly take care of you, want you to be my omega,” He cooed, his free hand catching the stray tear, “No need to cry, I’ve got you. I’ll drive you home today.”

As he finished his sentence, you felt your feet be lifted from the figurative quicksand, turning on your heels. A burn blossomed within your ribcage providing you a shortness of breath as you wiped away the dampness on your cheeks. Breezing through the now empty lunch line, you bought a lemonade and treat from the end cart, the older woman giving you a look. One that meant you better eat something better tomorrow, you smiled at her in appreciation, knowing her for years.

Eddie was looking amongst the crowd before he met your sight, shoulders relaxing visibly as you walked to him, sitting at the seat saved beside him. The boys of Hellfire gave you a kind smile and a hi before going back to their campaign talk.

“Where’s your lunch?” Eddie questioned as you popped open the plastic covering the small rice krispy treat. You shrugged, taking a bite of the sugary snack as Eddie began quietly reminding you how important it was for you to eat well, particularly after heats.

The anxiety didn’t leave as you took a sip of your drink, nearly choking on it as you saw the basketball team sitting at their typical table, including their MVP. His touch taunted you, his voice grating as he spewed false promises, but nothing felt worse than seeing his false smile and almost trusting him.

You didn’t like Jason, but the nature aspect of alphas and omegas was irrefutable in the beginning stages. He was telling you what you wanted to hear, things Eddie didn’t have to directly vocalize because you already knew he was your alpha, knowing he would provide for you.

“What’s wrong? You’re scared.” Eddie interjected your psychoanalysis as you twisted a sticky piece of puffed rice in between your fingertips. Shaking your head, you tried listening to Gareth describing their next attack, but Eddie reigned you back in.

“Hey, talk to me, please.” He whispered, his hand grabbing your knee in a comforting manner, the best feeling you had experienced all day. Yet the whiplash of feelings made the tears resurface, opening your lips to speak before clamping them shut and scurrying out of the lunch room.

You didn’t look back as you went straight to the parking lot, inhaling the fresh air intensely as if you hadn’t breathed in a minute. The sound of sneakers followed behind you, feeling Eddie behind you mentally until his hand reached your lower back.

“It’s nothing.” You muttered, wiping your black stained tears, sniffling. It was naive to believe you could hide things from each other anymore as every interaction was more intense than the last, feeling your bodies mush into one cohesive response system.

He didn’t need to edge you on, only raising his eyebrows and staring down at you. Damn those soft, brown eyes that always made you melt, enticing you with every blink. He hugged you close to his chest, hearing his heartbeat evenly.

“Jason talked to me in the hallway,” His body instinctively tensed, “S-said he wanted to be my alpha, drive me home, and take care of me. I don’t want that, you’re my alpha.” Nuzzling deeper against his band tee, his jaw clenched in an attempt to reign in his anger.

“He’s not going to lay a hand on you, baby doll, but let me pay him a visit.”

The final bell rang to signal everyone out for the day, escaping as fast as you could for the gravel filled parking lot. You waited near the steps for Eddie as cars sped off, blasting the newest Billy Joel or Soft Cell record, much different from your alpha’s taste.

Peace only lasted so long though as Jason drove around the road, looping back to pull up in front of you. His car purred to a stop, hopping out and pushing his sunglasses to his hairline.

The green letterman jacket on his arms squeaked as he outstretched his arms, waiting for you to come closer until he saw your hesitation, sauntering a few inches closer. His breath fanned against your face, tickling your lower lashes to make you blink harshly.

“You have two seconds to back the fuck off, Carver.” Eddie all, but growled at the shorter man before him, leaving the double doors a foot behind you.

Anger was laced with every word as his disdain for the spoiled rich kid interfered with his newfound alpha protectiveness. His knuckles cracked as they clenched at his sides, only opening a hand to push you behind his frame.

“How about you learn to treat your girl right-” Jason began until Eddie grabbed him by the collar, lifting him from the ground.

While they both were newfound alphas, having an omega meant enhanced results, like an increase in strength. He saw the flash of fear in his light colored eyes, making his brain produce serotonin.

“Say one more thing to her and you’ll never speak again or be able to have children, got it?” He ordered, watching as the boy in his grasp rolled his eyes before he slammed his body into his car, grunting in pain.

“Eddie, please.” You begged softly, not wanting to risk suspension or a crowd of people who couldn’t give less of a shit of his well being. Thankfully Jason nodded, making Eddie release his firm grasp before walking you back to his van.

The ride was quiet as he drove down the winding roads of Indiana, the leaves going from green to orange, some scattering the ground. His hand rested on your upper thigh, tight as if you would vanish right beneath him. A part of him feared you would really leave him for Jason, someone who could take care of you financially and not have the town's eyes on them in a negative light.

“I wouldn’t dream of leaving you, handsome.” You spoke as if to his thoughts as he smiled, eyes still trained on the black road before him, lifting your hand to put a gentle kiss on your soft skin.

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angelstate · 1 year

Text

You Shouldn't (PT. 1)

Pairing: Peter Parker x fem!reader

Genre:, Angst, Fluff? (Not finished ending)

Warnings: low self-esteem, depression, negative and pessimistic mindset, mention of eating disorder, suicide attempt.

Please do not read if you're sensitive to those topics or if you're easily triggered by them.

Summary: You could no longer pretend to be happy, your boyfriend peter notice but you were too far gone into your own head.

Words:4.7k!

(sorry for being gone! I wasn't doing well mentally and i wrote this throughout that so this is super sad and maybe a little heavy to read)

you were ok, you had to be, everything in your life was great, you were studying to become a psychiatrist just like you wanted, you had a loving boyfriend and you were writing a book about a tragic love story.

How could you not be happy? You had no reason to be unhappy but..you are.

you were so unhappy it was maddening, you couldn't eat or sleep because of how tired and suicidal you felt since the moment you woke up to the moment you would fell back asleep.

you tried to blame the final exams, because of course they were super stressful, but you have aced all of them. you tried to blame the pressure you felt about finish writing your book because of course that was super stressful too, but you had all the time you wanted to write it.

maybe it was the fact you went low contact with your parents because of how against they were about you studying psychiatry but you did that for your own good 2 years ago and you never regretted it.

maybe it was seasonal depression? it could have been it if it wasn't for the fact you have had clinical depression since you were 8 years old.

it was so infuriating. Because why, why right after you had finally put your life together you were drowning again in the ocean of depression you had fought so hard to get out of? It was like the universe wanted you to fail and fall deep into your feelings.

you knew the moment you stopped eating breakfast and dinner that you were spiraling back into your unhealthy cycle; your pride didn't let you pay attention to that though.

you held too much pride into the fact the you finally had control over your life to stop and accept you were going into your depression again.

maybe if you had gotten up one day and told your therapist that it had gotten bad again you would already been out of this horrible state.

instead you chose to fake it till you make it, stupid decision because even if you fake your not depressed that doesn't change the fact that you were. Being in denial about it was just going to harm you in the long run.

and it did. it harmed you so fucking much you stopped pretending you weren't depressed. What was even the point, nobody even noticed the first time you were depressed so they wouldn't the second time.

_______________

"you have to get up" peter said and looked at you.

you were laying on your bed, blankets covering you till your neck, hair messy and full of knots because you haven't brushed it in 3 days.

"i don't want to" you answered and closed your eyes pretending to sleep right in front of peter.

"you have to" peter pressed and sat in your desk chair.

"no i don't" you said, today you didn't have classes so you had no reason to get up.

"you do, when was the last time you ate something?" he asked and pointed at you with a look of worry in his face.

"i don't know, like 4 hours ago?" You lied and pressed your lips in a thin line.

"really? because I've been here for the last 8 hours so how didn't i saw you at the kitchen?" He Said with a tone of disbelief, questioned you.

"i had food here" you lied again.

"ok, then what did you eat?" Peter crossed his arms and raised an eyebrow waiting for you to answer, maybe this time with the truth.

"i ate a Snickers and a protein bar" you answered after 10 seconds of silence.

"where are the wrappers then?" He knew what to ask. You were cornered because what lie could you possibly say now.

"i don't know" you pouted and looked down.

"don't lie to me, flower. tell me, why have you not eaten?" peter said softly, worry dripping from his eyes and voice.

"i haven't been hungry" you answered.

"ok...are you hungry now?" he asked, ready to get up and bring anything you felt like eating.

"not really" you whispered and closed your eyes again, you felt so tired.

"are you ok flower?" peter stood up and walked towards you, sitting on the bed and moving the covers do he could see your face fully.

"yes, just tired" your voice was shaky, you were the furthest thing from ok.

"alright, then sleep, tomorrow ill pick you up so we can go eat breakfast at the new coffee shop" he said before giving you a little kiss on your forehead.

"good night, flower. I love you" peter whispered in your ear.

"bye pete. I love you too" you whispered back and let yourself fell back asleep.

________________

you pulled away from peter two weeks after he caught you lying about your eating habits.

you were ashamed and embarrassed. Not just for getting caught lying but because no matter how bad you felt for doing it, you still believed that stop eating wasn't a bad thing.

You were losing weight, you actually had lost 11lb in the span of 4 weeks. it's not like you needed to lose weight, you were underweight now.

But who didn't liked to be underweight? That meant you didn't have to worry it you gain weight because that meant you would enter into your perfect weight.

It was different with you, you had anorexia nervosa when you were a teenager. You punished your body by not eating everytime you weren't good at something.

you punished yourself a lot at the time, not because you weren't good but because your parents always told you that you could be better.

It didn't matter if you were good because you weren't the best.

now, 2 months have passed since you slowly pulled away from peter. You didn't cut him off or broke up, you talked to him, you spent time with him but you no longer could be by his side all the time.

you wanted to be left alone, in the dark of your room, in the hole you dig to hide your feelings. You just wanted to pretend you weren't in pain with no people around you to show you how obviously you were lying to yourself.

"can i have uhm...a water with strawberries toppings" you said.

"what size the drink?" the girl behind the register asked with a kind smile.

"a venti please" you answered.

"do you want ice in the drink?"

"yes."

"ok, it will be 2 dollars and 50 cents" the girl said and you gave her a 5 dollar bill.

after she gave you your change you sat down on one of the empty tables to wait for your drink.

you had a lot of things to do today so you forced yourself to get up early, brush your teeth, shower and brush your hair.

now all you needed was breakfast, what you just ordered was your breakfast.

you felt guilty about even coming to Starbucks and buying it.

you should have just brought a water bottle from your department but you didn't thought about it before you left.

you were on Instagram seeing your friends posts when suddenly peter called you, sighing you decided not to answer.

thirty seconds later he called again, you picked up this time. Maybe it was something important.

"hello?"

"hi, flower. how are you?"

"i'm great, what about you?"

"i'm good, what are you doing?"

"im at starbucks, uhm..eating breakfast"

"really? That's great. i called you because aunt may want you to come and have dinner with us today"

"today?"

"yeah, are you busy?"

"uhm, a little but i can make time"

"great! i can go pick you up at 7"

"you don't have to, I'll just go after i finish my errands"

"are you sure?"

"yeah, I'll be at your house at 7"

"ok, i love u"

"love u too"

"I'll see you later, flower"

"see you"

you hung up, your body already felt tired and drained. All the energy you had for the day was already gone after that phonecall.

when did putting effort in your relationship began to feel so tiring? why were you becoming such a shitty girlfriend.

you loved peter since you were 14, you became his friend and spend months of your life with peter by your side till he finally became your boyfriend and now you couldn't bring yourself to putting the effort even though you're mind was screaming at you to do so.

"i'm a shitty person" you whispered and walked out of Starbucks with your drink.

_____________

"why didn't you show up?" Peter was in your front door, face filled with frustration and anger you knew you had provoked.

"im sorry" you said, that all you could say to be honest. you weren't capable in going on a full rant about how suicidal you felt yesterday to the point you just went home without even finishing your errands and then fell asleep crying because of how tired you felt.

the thing about the depression is, you can't tell people why you're depressed. sometimes you don't know why. And when you do, you can't bring yourself to tell anyone. you didn't want for people to think you felt entitled to receive help.

"i knows you are, what i don't know is why you didn't show up" he said loudly, stepping inside of your apartment and closing the door so this conversation would be private.

"something i ate made me sick" you lied and hugged yourself, looking up you saw how peter face had a expression of disbelief.

you saw how his eyes scanned your figure, throwing daggers at the way your "skinny jeans" were baggy on your figure, how your shirt seem oversized and how your skin was pale and dull.

"don't lie" he finally answered and looked at you with worry, his voice still filled with frustration.

"im not lying" you weren't exactly lying, you did felt sick, you had thrown up but you didn't ate so no food made you sick.

"you are, i know you're not eating. There's something wrong and you're not being honest with me. I can help you if you don't talk to me" peter stretched his arms out, reaching out to you but waiting for you to walk into his arms.

"i don't need help" you took a few steps back until the back of your legs made contact with the couch.

"i know you need help, if this is like when we were in high school i can help you. I know how you just need to let me in" peter pressed and walked closer to you.

"this isn't like high school, pete. I'm not sick i don't need your help or any help at all." you lied.

you needed his help, your body and mind were screaming for it. for him to save you from drowning in this ocean of depression. to give you his hand so you can take it and see the sun again and felt nourished by the sun rays.

"don't do this, please." peter suddenly begged you.

"don't do what?" you asked unsure of what to do at the sudden change of mood in the room.

"don't shut me off again. I want to help you and be by your side, you can't give up on yourself. You can expect me to give up on you" peter whimpered at the last sentence, his eyes slowly began to form tears.

your heart broke, and your emotions began to explote in your mind, how sorry you felt for peter, for feeling sad about your unhealthy state and for how miserable being with you was making him be.

you needed to be comforted and yet you broke the boy in front of you to be point he needed it more than you at this moment.

you were a shitty girlfriend.

"in sorry, ok?" you whispered and closed the distance between peter and you before hugging him.

you were sorry, you were really really sorry about not showing up, about lying, about pulling away and not putting effort in the relationship.

You hated the fact that even feeling extremely sorry you couldn't bring yourself to speak to him about how it had gotten bad again and this time you really believed you wouldn't be able to get out.

"please don't push me away" peter whispered in your ear and hugged you back hiding his face on your neck, breathing in your smell and realizing how his frustration didn't left his body.

"i won't, your stuck with me forever" you answered but didn't what you said didn't felt true

of course you wouldn't push him away again, but 'forever'? would you really be here for him forever, alive? you weren't sure that was a promise you could keep. Sooner or later you would give up.

"forever" he whispered back.

____________

forever: adverb

meaning: for All future time; for always.

you shouldn't have used the word forever, not then and not now. In the ending of your suicide letter.

you shouldn't be promising to be stuck by his side forever in the after life or on all the other lives you'll have to live until you can finally rest.

you shouldn't be whispering to yourself forever now, promising yourself and eternal bed of rest.

you shouldn't be laying on your bathtub with your clothes on, filled to the brim with hit water, so hit that it's making your skin sting.

you shouldn't be eyeing the blade in your right hand like your past lover from another life, finally reunited after such a long wait to kiss again.

you shouldn't.

you shouldn't but you were.

you had love and fear tattooed on your eyes, your mouth tasting the bitterness of fake acceptance of the ending.

your hands shaking with excitement and fear; with anticipation and hesitation.

you shouldn't be doing this if half of your body is drowning on sorrow and hesitation but you were doing this.

it had been way too long, you used too much time to feel your feelings so now you were acting on them. your pain was acting his most desired fantasy.

you were screwed from the moment you picked up the red inked pen and wrote on that white sheet of paper that was laying on your desk, waiting to be used, waiting to be stained with your tears.

you wanted to pick up your phone and cry for help to your peter, tell him you were about to do something you shouldn't and to save you like the super hero he is.

but you couldn't, you couldn't, you couldn't.

you couldn't and it that was about to kill you.

"god please forgive me" you whispered, running the blade deeply in both of your wrists, cutting a long line across your upper arms.

the pain took your breath away, like when you were a kid and almost drowned in your uncle's pool, the same pain and breathlessness the water inside your lungs created.

the sound of your blood dripping into the bath made you feel nauseous, like when you were a teenager and the smell of food when you starved yourself for to long made you throw up.

the smell was slowly getting stronger to the point in got overwhelming to your tired body, like the first time you took this same desition.

This was too much.

you shouldn't, you shouldn't, you shouldn't.

but you did.

and god how good it felt.

wow.

everything went black, your mind filled with peace, the silence was comforting and you were wrapped in a bed of comfort. Slowly sinking more to the point you couldn't breath.

your skin felt warm, like your head was disconnected to your body, your thoughts finally leaving your mind like a running tap, nothing stopping the flow of your most secrets and suicidal thoughts.

there was nothing and there was everything around you, all the things that filled your soul with experiences was happening around you, memories flooding the endless space you were floating so carelessly.

this was paradise, until your mind started to rant about the way hell was here

hell was you

hell was waking up

hell was taking deep breaths

......

wake up and take a deep breath; look around you and accept your alive in between disasters out of reach of your fixing hands.

wake up and take a deep breath; look beside you and take in the features of who's laying beside you, in the same bed of pain. Suffering differently but in the same level as you.

wake up and take a deep breath; look at your body laying in a bathtub of pain filled with red water, realize is the same as the bed of pain, only lonelier and eternal in your dying body.

wake up and take a deep breath.

________________

you woke up and took a deep breath, looked beside you and found the familiar features of who just like promised, was laying beside you, this ion a uncomfortable chair, head resting on the hospital bed your tired body was resting on.

his hands was holding yours, touch warm and comforting, just like the last thing you remember.

he moved, slowly. Bringing his head slightly closer to your body, searching for the warm your tired body wasn't able to provide him anymore.

he just found your waist, bringing his free hand to rest on the new found skin, searching for a trace of past memories.

the ones his bedroom walls witnessed.

you took a deep breath, filling your lungs with the air you desperately tried to get rid off, you body slowly fighting to bring your warm back.

to bring you back to life in the spiritual way, the one you died long ago.

you took a deep breath.

this time he woke up, eyes adjusting to the light of the room before falling on your face.

your eyes wide open, lips and skin pale but screaming silently about the minuscule life it held.

slowly, his expression filled with realization of your not so lifeless body, his eyes grew wide and desperate, his lower lip quivered and his hands that held you began to shake.

"your alive" he said in disbelief, voice shaking and out of breath.

you couldn't say anything, there were no options going through your mind, everything was empty. no words sounded appropriate in your mind.

so you just stared at him with your clueless and death doe eyes, no light inside of them to show him a peak of your bruised soul.

"why are you alive?" your eyes went completely empty, how can you answer that?.

"I don't know'

.......

(to be continued)

#peter parker #peter parker fic #peter parker fluff #spiderman #tom holland spiderman #peter parker x fem!reader #peter parker x reader #spiderman fic #spiderman angst #spiderman fluff #spiderman sad #the avengers

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graysnetwork · 1 year

Note

Hiiii I saw your Keegan work and I must say I love it and I was wondering if you could write something with Keegan where he and s/o having an argument and how they make up

Hi!! Ty for the compliment 🤭🙏🏼 this was such a good idea!! 🫶🫶

(Not my gif obvi) (but my man)

So usually you two don’t argue, it’s very rare, but it’s doesn’t happen sometimes

He would probably get upset with you if you had done something a bit risky, like being close to an edge of something with no railing,

or almost touching fire by accident, things like that

But one day you found his guns and you checked them out and one of them was loaded in case of an intruder

And you didn’t realize and Keegan found you and got mad that you were snooping through his things

You started getting mad at him for not telling him about the guns

You two were obviously just mad in the heat of the moment and you weren’t that upset you just wanted answers

He cut you off in one of your sentences and said “y’know what, im leaving, I’ll be gone for a while” or “I can’t do this right now sweetheart. Im leaving” and he would give you a quick peck on the lips hoping you would get distracted

But it only made you even more upset

He left for a few hours so you made dinner and put some food in the fridge for him

While he was gone mid drive to the park to cool down, he realized how dumb the argument was and he wanted to apologize to you for not telling you, cause you were right (ofc u were)

But Keegan’s really awkward about all that stuff cause he’s “always right” and he’s “bratty” as you say

So he wouldn’t really know how to tell you “I’m Sorry, you were right”

So he went out to go get you flowers and a card, cause he’s better at writing then saying it to you (he’s better at saying how he feels in letters and card then saying it to you cause he shy and doesn’t know how to articulate anything)

And then he went to the park to let himself cool down and think for a while

When he got back home you were just coming out of the shower so he left your flowers and card on the kitchen island

He decided he would try to apologize to you, face to face, but when he to your guy’s room you completely ignored him

“Don’t ignore me sweetheart” is what he’d say but you just continued getting ready for bed

He just sighed and accepted that you would act like this since you were upset, so he went to his last resort… in the kitchen

….

He tightens the jars in the kitchen so you have to ask him for help

It’s the only way he get you to talk to him when your mad at him but it works every time

And you never realized which he’s so great full for

And then the next day you wake up, go to the kitchen and read the card Keegan wrote

“Y/n, I realized you were right and I’m sorry about not telling you about the guns, the only reason I have them is incase something happens and I just want to be safe. I just never thought that you would need to know about them, and it was stupid of me not to tell you, because you could someday need to use it. The argument was stupid and I was wrong, im sorry honey, can we please just talk and work this out? Please forgive me sweetheart”

Btw he’s a very good writer, he loves writing

Anyways

Back to the head cannons

You smiled at the letter and the flowers he got you, but you weren’t going to wake him up yet, so you decided to make breakfast.

And you needed help unscrewing the pancake batter (like the one that u shake)

So you had to go into your guy’s room and ask him for help

You shook him by his shoulder till he finally woke up “hm? What’s up” he said rubbing his eyes, you held the mix out and said annoyed

can you open this for me” and he took it and opened it for you, to put some dramatic affect you crossed your arms

You weren’t mad at him but you wanted him to think you were cause you weren’t gonna let him off that easy

“Thanks” you said when he opened it and left the room, he just smiled to himself, hoping you would cool down soon

He sat up in bed and grabbed a bright pink sticky note off of the night stand, it read “hurry up and brush you teeth, so you can eat with me handsome”

You had made a note for him and left it when you came into the room ☹️🫠

#imagines #x reader stories #fluff #call of duty #oneshot #keegan p russ #call of duty keegan #cod keegan #keegan russ #keegan x reader #keegan russ x you #keegan russ x reader #keegan russ smut #keegan smut

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imbestforyou · 9 months

Note

can you write about the reader never drinking/smoking so jj stops doing it as much too?

(sober-ish) with you

requested - blurb

pairing: jj maybank x reader (she/her)

summary: read request ^

approx. reading time: around one minute

warning(s): drinking, smoking, pet name (baby)

note: i did briefly talk about this in this fic, fireworks (go check it out if you haven’t) you weren’t specific with what you wanted so i just wrote what felt right for me! let me know if you want something more specific!

requests are open, send them in!

masterlist | navigation | request guidelines

you didn’t like drinking or smoking. so when you met jj’s friends, the people you knew went to keggers and smoked so much the smell was radiating off them, you were intimidated.

jj knew your dislike of these habits and although he still did them, it wasn’t as bad as before you came into his life. he didn’t drink every day from the moment he woke up ‘till he passed out at night. he occasionally drank and only smoked outside of the house, he would then take a shower to get the smell off of him before he laid in bed with you.

you didn’t want to change him, you only wanted him to be safe and healthy.

after being introduced and realizing they weren’t what everyone had whispered about, you relaxed. and so did jj.

he started drinking one beer, then two, then two turned into four and you couldn’t help but notice it.

“hey j?” you whisper.

“yeah baby?” his full attention to you.

“you’re drinking a lot.”

“you’re right i’m sorry.” he immediately gives his beer to john b.

“you’re already done man?” he hesitantly takes the beer.

“yeah yeah, i’m good we gotta get home safe.”

although you could tell john b wanted to say more he didn’t.

like jj promised he didn’t drink the rest of the night and you both got home safely.

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callsign-magnolia · 3 months

Text

Love In The Dark // Ch. 2

Mature Content 18+

Summary: Iris never realized how much she truly depended on her eyesight until it was gone. But it never really stopped her, just another hurdle to jump over in life. Depending on people was never something she got used to, she still attempts to do things herself. Eventually, her roommate and best friend let's her down, but a tall, sandy brown haired aviator catches her.

Rooster x Blind!OC

Warnings: angst, alcohol, deception? I think that's it, if I missed any let me know!

Word Count: 3.7k

Chapter 1 | Masterlist

The next three weeks were awkward. Mandi avoided Iris like the plague and Iris didn't push her. "I still wish you had called me." Emily, Iris' assistant said as she sat on the opposite side of her desk. "I thought about it, but I knew Lucas was in bed." She scoffed. "Josh could've taken care of him if he woke up, or I could've sent Josh to get you. Just please don't take rides from strangers. It's dangerous for anyone, blind or not." Iris bit her lip. "Iris." Emily scolded. "Well he's not a stranger any more!" Emily looks at her in shock. "You still don't know him! What's his real name? Where does he work?" Iris stayed quiet because she didn't have the answers. “Exactly. He's still a stranger so if there is a next time, no matter how late it is, call me?" Iris huffed, sitting back in her executive chair. "Yes mom." She laughed at her just as a notification sounded on Iris' computer. "We have fifteen minutes till our meeting with the Lee's." Iris had just set out some water bottles when Emily brought the Lee's in. "Iris, this is Julia and Hank Lee.” Iris turned towards Emily and gave a wide smile. "Mister and Misses Lee." She took a single step forward and held out her hand. "It's wonderful to meet you." The calloused hand of Hank Lee met hers before the smaller and softer one of Julia. "Why don't we have a seat?" The couple nodded before remembering. "Of course." Hank said. They took their seats as Iris sat across from them. "I have to say, we were nervous to use you." Julia said, and Iris gave her a wide smile. "It's understandable.” They felt relieved at her words. "But we took so many chances with this house, and they've paid off. So we decided we wanted to take one with you." Iris nodded, excitement building in her chest.

"Well, I really think you'll like what we came up with." Iris turned towards the screen as Emily used her laptop to cast the live prints onto the large tv. Hank and Julia's jaws dropped. "Wha-how. It's beautiful.” Julia gasped. "It's just what we imagined! How did you know?” Iris grinned at them. “You told me what you wanted. I just wrote it all down and I got an image in my head. I described it to Emily and she drew the blueprints. You talked about the house being in the middle of the woods and how you loved natural light so I wanted there to be plenty of windows.” Iris explained and Julia nodded. “You also have a semi open floor plan. So your kitchen is split from the living room, but you only have a divider, not a whole wall.” Iris told them and went over the rest of the floor plans. “We absolutely love it.” Julia said and Iris smiled at them. “I’m glad you do. We strive to ensure that you get everything you want out of these plans.” Emily nodded. “So if you like them, we can go into my office and get some paperwork filled out.” Emily said, standing and Iris joined her. “We’d love to.” Hank said and turned to Iris. “Thank you for making our dreams a reality.” He said, shaking Iris’ hand one last time. “I’m grateful you gave me the opportunity to do it.” She replied and they smiled at her. “This paperwork won’t take long. Follow me.” Emily said, leading the Lee’s out of the conference room.

By the time Emily dropped Iris at home, she felt exhausted. She punched in the code to the door and walked in. She could hear Mandi in the kitchen so she made her way upstairs, opting to shower before she did anything else. She set her purse down and gathered some comfy clothes to take into the bathroom. As she stepped out of her room she heard footsteps. “Iris?” Mandi spoke, standing at the top of the stairs. “Yes?” Iris asked. “Um, I made dinner.” She said and Iris raised a brow in her direction. “Okay.” She said and Mandi sighed. “Can we talk at dinner?” She asked and Iris stilled for a moment before nodding. “Sure.” She said before disappearing into the bathroom, leaving Mandi standing alone in the hallway. After her shower Iris towel dried her hair before slipping into some pajamas and making her way downstairs.

“Smells good.” She said as she slowly approached the kitchen. Mandi nodded, smiling at Iris as she pulled the pasta off the stove. “It’s your favorite.” Iris gave her a small smile, feeling very odd at their current situation. “Creamy Italian Sausage Pasta?” She asked and Mandi nodded. “Yeah, why don’t you go sit down. I’ve already put some wine on the table.” Iris nodded and made her way to the table. Once she sat down she slowly reached for the wine bottle, the cold glass meeting her hand as she wrapped her fingers around the neck of the bottle. She pulled her glass close, touching the bottle to the glass and turning it up. “Stop.” Mandi said and Iris smiled, stopping. “Did you let me pour your kind of glass or my kind of glass?” She asked. “Your kind. It’s practically full.” She said and Iris chuckled. Soon Mandi put food on their plates and they started eating. “I want to apologize.” Mandi interrupted and Iris stopped eating, a little surprised by Mandi’s words. “Thank you.” Iris said, wiping her mouth with her napkin. “It was very selfish and very wrong of me to do what I did, and to react the way I did as well.” She said and Iris sat there quietly, unsure of what to say. “You left me stranded, Mandi.” Iris said when she found her words. Mandi nodded, acknowledging her words. “I know, and Iris, you have no idea how bad I feel.” Mandi said and she saw Iris fold into herself. Mandi saw Iris do this many times in college and she knew she was losing Iris’ trust. “Let me make it up to you.” Mandi said catching Iris’ attention. “How?” Iris asked. “Jake, the guy I left with is having a barbecue tomorrow and he invited me.” She said and Iris sighed. “Invited you not me.” Iris specified. She didn’t want to be the person who crashed the party. She was not explicitly invited so she wouldn’t go. “Oh come on Iris! It’ll be fun and I’ll tell you what, I will text Jake right now and ask him.” Mandi said and Iris sighed. “As long as he says it’s okay.” Iris said, propping her chin on her fist. “You know how awkward it is when you aren’t invited.” Mandi thought back to college and all of the parties she crashed. But it was never awkward. Mandi grabbed her phone and text Jake quickly. She thought it would be a while before she heard from him but she was shocked when he texted her back immediately.

‘I thought you said she was annoying?’

Mandi pursed her lips. She did say that, didn’t she. Iris did get on her nerves when she needed her, but that wasn’t often. Mandi really was a bad friend last weekend and she needed to make it up to Iris.

‘She can be. But she’s been down for a few days and I think it would make her feel better.’

They made small talk through dinner until Jake texted back. “He said it’s okay.” Mandi said, smiling at Iris who still looked uncomfortable. “What time do I need to be ready tomorrow?” She asked. “He said to be there by one, so like twelve-thirty.” Iris nodded, getting up and grabbing her plate. “Oh, I got it.” Mandi said, standing and taking the plate. “I can help you clean up.” Iris tried to offer but Mandi shook her head. “No, I got it.” She said and took the plate from Iris’ hands. “Okay. I’m just gonna go upstairs and dry my hair.” Mandi nodded, turning for the kitchen. “Okay! Goodnight!” She said and Iris headed upstairs. Iris thought about Mandi’s invite. Usually Mandi just went to these things alone. She’s invited Iris to these things before and she’s gone but it’s been a few years since that happened. Now they do their own things now, not needing to be with each other all the time anymore. So it felt odd that Mandi wanted her to go. After Iris dried her hair, she called Emily. “Hey.” Emily said and Iris flopped on her bed. “Tell me if this is weird.” Iris said and Emily chuckled. “Ooh! I love this game!” Emily said. “Mandi invited me to a barbecue tomorrow, hosted by the guy she left with when she abandoned me at that bar.” Iris was startled by the noise that came from the other side of the phone. “No way.” Iris nodded. “What did you say?” She asked and Iris sighed, climbing under her covers. “I told her I'd go.” She said and could practically feel the disappointment from the other side of the phone. “Really?”

“Yeah, she texted him and everything and he said I could come.” Iris wanted to go, to give Mandi the chance to prove that Iris could trust her, but she also didn’t want to go, scared it would just be a repeat. “After last time I don’t know how I feel about you going out with her. I’m not your mom, and I can’t tell you what to do but please call me if you need me. I’d feel better knowing you would call me if something happened.” Emily said and Iris nodded. “I will.” She said. “I guess I’m gonna go to bed. The last few weeks have made me so exhausted, mentally and emotionally.” Iris said, rolling onto her back. “Okay, well keep me updated. I have your location so if you need me, I’ll come get you, okay?” Iris nodded. “Okay, goodnight Em.” With that they both hung up and Iris put her phone on the charger before laying on her back again. She faced the ceiling, nerves making her stomach roll. She would know nobody there besides Mandi, and if Mandi left her stranded again that was it. She would tell Mandi she’d have to find somewhere else to live. A part of Iris felt like she should’ve told Mandi that the first time, and maybe she should have, but she knew Mandi could be a good person. Mandi just had to prove it to her.

The next day, Iris made sure she was ready early. Denim shorts, a white tank top and a sage button down seemed good enough for a barbecue. It was simple and casual. Iris left her hair down, but made sure a clip was in her purse in case she got hot later. “Alexa, what time is it?” Iris asked and the device answered her. “The time is twelve oh five p.m.” She nodded, making sure she had her phone and everything before making her way downstairs to wait on Mandi. Mandi usually takes a while to get ready so Iris turned on the book she had been listening to to pass the time. Soon half an hour goes by of Iris sitting on the couch before Mandi finally makes her way downstairs. “Is that what you're wearing?” Mandi asked and Iris rolled her eyes before turning off her book and standing. “Is there a problem with what I’m wearing?” She asked, crossing her arms over her chest. “No! It’s cute, just very casual.” Mandi said quickly. “Well what are you wearing?” Iris asked as she made her way towards the front door. “Oh, just a dress and some heels.” Typical Mandi. Always dressed to the nines wherever she goes.”Cute.” Iris said as Mandi grabbed her purse and followed after her. “Thanks.” With that they walked out the door and towards Mandi’s Infinity.

Things felt like they were normal in the car. Like they were back to being best friends and Iris enjoyed it. It gave her hope that things could go back to how they were. Iris didn’t want to lose Mandi as a best friend, but she couldn’t keep her as one if she couldn’t trust her with something as simple as taking her home from a place she dragged her too. Once they arrived Iris slid out of the car, walking towards the front of the car to wait on Mandi. “You feeling okay?” Mandi asked as she walked towards Iris, gently linking her arm with Iris’. “A little nervous, but I’m okay for the most part.” Iris told her and Mandi nodded. “It’ll be okay.” She said, gently squeezing Iris’ arm as they walked up to the front door. Mandi could see in through the glass door and she noticed everyone was out back so she rang the doorbell.

Within a few seconds, Jake’s head peeked out of the kitchen and smiled when he saw Mandi. He used a towel to wipe off his hands and walked towards the door. “Hey come on in.” He said as he pushed the glass door open. Mandi let Iris go in first before she followed. “Hi darlin’.” Jake said, leaning in and kissing Mandi’s cheek. “Hi Jake.” She said before turning to Iris. “Jake, this is my friend Iris. Iris, this is Jake.” Iris immediately stuck her hand out, allowing Jake to meet her in the middle. “It’s nice to meet you.” She said and he nodded, observing the girl who still had her sunglasses on. “It’s nice to meet you too.” He responded. “Well I’m just finishing up some of the food, everyone else is outside. I'll introduce you.” He said, leading Mandi and Iris out the back door and onto the large deck. “Hey guys, most of you probably remember Mandi.” He said and she waved as everyone greeted her. “And this is her roommate, Iris.” He said and Iris gave a small wave as well. “Make yourselves comfortable. I’ll be back.” With that, Jake turned around, kissing Mandi before he went back inside. “Hi guys.” Mandi said, walking with Iris over towards the long table where everyone else was. “Hey Mandi, good to see you're still around.” Coyote said as he pulled two chairs out. “Yeah, he can’t get rid of me that easily.” Mandi said. “So Iris, is it?” Coyote asked, catching the woman's attention. “Yeah and you are?” She asked, listening to his voice closely. “Javy, but everyone calls me Coyote.” He said and Iris held out her hand and he shook it. “Nice to meet you Coyote.”

Everyone at the table introduced themselves and Iris listened very closely to their voices, hoping she could keep from mixing them up. So far she has pinpointed three women minus Mandi and many, many men. “I’m gonna go grab a drink, want anything?” Mandi asked Iris and she faced Mandi. Normally she’d be opposed to Mandi drinking, but Iris wanted to give her the benefit of the doubt. “Um yeah, anything with vodka.” Mandi smiled at her and nodded before getting up and going inside. “So Iris, what do you do?” The woman who introduced herself as Halo asked. “Oh I have an interior design business.” She said and Penny sat up. “Really?” Penny asked and Iris nodded, facing her. “I do.” She said. “I have been considering remodeling my house and I have some ideas but I’ve been needing some help.” Penny said and she nodded. “Sure, just get with me later and I’ll give you my card and we can schedule an appointment.” She said. She didn’t want to tell everyone just yet that she was blind. She found that letting people get to know her before she told them was the better way to go.

Rooster huffed as he pulled into Jake’s driveway. He had been here all of ten minutes before Jake asked him to go back out and get two bags of ice. Of course it was also a weekend where everyone else in southern California needed ice. Rooster hauled the two bags inside and glared at Jake as he walked into the kitchen. “I went to four different gas stations and three grocery stores for these bags of ice, so pay up.” He said as he set the bags in the two coolers Jake set out. Jake just laughed and pulled out his wallet, handing Rooster a twenty for the gas. “Thanks for getting them man, I really do appreciate it.” Rooster just nodded, stuffing the twenty into his own wallet. “Want me to put the beers in?” He asked and Jake nodded, "Do you mind?” Rooster shook his head and headed for the garage where he knew all the cases of beer were. “Oh, sorry!” A feminine voice said as he swung the door open and almost ran into her. Rooster stopped for a second and stared at the woman before it all clicked in his head. “Hey, you’re uh Mandi right?” He asked, stepping past her in the doorway. “Yeah, Rooster right?” He nodded. It was weird seeing her sober. But all he could think about was her roommate and how she just left her at the bar with no way home. “Yeah.” He muttered before turning away from her and grabbed the cases.

When he walked back into the house he caught a glimpse of everyone on the back deck, and he froze when he saw a familiar face. “Who’s the other drink for?” Jake asked Mandi. “Iris. She said anything with vodka and she loves a good vodka soda.” She said as she made her drink. Bradley heard Iris’ name and his heart sped up. “What the hell?” He muttered to himself. “I thought she didn’t drink?” Jake asked and Mandi shook her head. “She does occasionally. It’s not something she does often so it’s nice to see her letting loose a little.” Mandi said as she started on her own drink. “As long as she doesn’t start clinging to you because I have plans for you later.” Jake said as he wrapped his arms around her waist. Rooster rolled his eyes at them before he looked back outside and saw Iris laughing at something Payback had said. “She won’t. She’ll relax, I’ll take her home and then I’ll come back.” Mandi said. “You could just get her an uber.” Jake said and Rooster scoffed to himself. “No. I left her stranded that night I went home with you, and this is me making it up to her.” She said and Jake sighed.

“Well why don’t we go upstairs for like five minutes-” Bradley had heard enough and cut Jake off. “I don’t want to hear any of that.” He said, making a disgusted face at them. “I’m going to put the beers in the cooler and then go outside with everyone else.” He said, immediately pulling the beers out and putting them into the cooler. Once he was done he turned for the door but stopped and turned back to Mandi. “Can I have that?” He asked and she furrowed her brows. “Um why?” She asked, picking up the drink and holding it close. “It’s okay, darlin’. Rooster’s cool.” He said and Mandi visibly relaxed. “Wait, Rooster…” Mandi thought to herself, closing her eyes before she opened them and looked at him. “That’s right. You brought Iris home that night I left the bar with Jake.” She said and Jake turned to him. “What?” He asked, thoroughly confused. “I did.” Rooster bit back the venom he wanted to spew at her and Mandi could tell. “Um yeah, she’ll appreciate you bringing it to her.” She said, handing him the drink. “Thanks.” He muttered, turning for the back door.

“Hangman is a great guy and he does like Mandi, he can just be real cock sure sometimes and he comes off as an asshole sometimes.” Phoenix said to Iris who nodded. Iris was asking about Jake because she wasn’t so sure about him. But Phoenix definitely made her feel better. Iris felt someone pull out the chair next to her and sit down. “One vodka soda extra lime for the lady.” Iris immediately recognized that voice. She could pinpoint it anywhere in a crowd because it was so distinct. She turned to face him, a large smile on her face. “Rooster.” She said and he smiled at her. “Hi I-oof.” He was caught off guard when she sat up, pulling him into a tight hug. He squeezed her back smelling her lavender and sage soap. “How’ve you been?” She asked, pulling away. “Good. Kind of kicking myself for not getting your number.” He said and he was glad she couldn’t see him because a blush crept up his neck, almost matching the one on her own cheeks. “Well you can definitely have my number.” She said and Rooster smiled at her. “I’m sorry, am I missing something here?” Phoenix asked and Rooster nodded. “The night Mandi left with Jake, Rooster took me back to my place since Mandi was supposed to be my ride.” She said and Phoenix’s eyebrows shot up, looking at Rooster.

“Oh? And how did that go?” She asked. “Pretty good, he was sweet enough to wait till he heard me lock my door before walking away.” Iris said, her hand reaching out and resting on his arm and she grinned at him. Man, Rooster was so glad she couldn’t see what she was doing to him. “I didn’t think you heard that.” He admitted and Iris giggled at him. “Of course I heard it, and it was really sweet Rooster.” He’d been a mess the last three weeks, wondering how to get back in touch with her. He certainly didn’t want to show up at her house unannounced. “Um Rooster is my callsign in the navy. My name is actually Bradley. Bradley Bradshaw.” Iris laughed loudly as she slowly grabbed her drink from where he placed it in front of her. “Bradley Bradshaw? Did your parents want you to get picked on your whole life?” She asked before taking a sip and Rooster chuckled as he smiled. Oh yeah, he had to get her number.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Taglist: @roosterforme @mygyn @kmc1989 @briseisgone @lyn-js @shanimallina87 @dizzybee03 @lilylilyyyyyy

#maverick top gun #topgun #top gun imagine #top gun maverick #bradley bradshaw fic #rooster bradshaw #bradley rooster bradshaw #bradley bradshaw #rooster fanfic #rooster top gun #rooster imagine #rooster #bradley bradshaw imagine #bradley bradshaw x named reader #Rooster x Blind! OC #Love In The Dark #Blind!OC

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builtbybrokenbells · 6 months

Text

Gold Dust Woman | xiii

Gold Dust Woman finally learns how to pick up the pieces and go home.

Read part twelve here

Listen while reading: unknown/nth - Hozier (listened to this and cried the entire time I wrote this 🤭)

Pairing: Jake Kiszka x f!reader, Sam Kiszka x f!reader

Word Count: 13.5k

Warnings: ANGST, sadness, crying, breakups, feelings of regret/heartbreak, sad jake, swearing, smoking, some fluff! Sorry if I miss any!

only one more left after this one 😁 buckle up for the last bit of the ride (I was going to wait till the poll ended but I could NOT wait any longer. I’m so excited to finish up this piece as it’s been my main focus for so long. also lightly edited. my apologies 🫶🏻) as always, enjoy, be kind, and don’t mind any grammar mistakes!

Another city, another show. You were so caught up in the whirlwind of your life that you seemed to have forgotten what home truly was. Hotels were more familiar than you thought they ever could be, and you craved for a moment alone in your own house despite previously hating the emptiness that screamed from the walls. The show the night before went by without a hitch, and the weight of your decision was sitting heavy on your shoulders. You knew what you had to do, you just hadn’t yet gotten the chance to do it. After the concert came to a close, you were all too tired to even think about managing a night at the bar. You drove to the city over which you would be playing for tonight, and checked into the hotel rooms with no intent on leaving until the next morning. Dylan had fallen asleep in your bed with you, mid conversation about the high points of the night.

When you woke, she was still deep in slumber in her jeans and hoodie, neglecting blankets and pillows completely. You crawled from the mattress, a headache lingering but making a promise to leave as long as you had a sip of coffee. You showered, did your makeup, and dressed all before she even made a shift in her position. You opted to leave her there to catch up on her sleep, knowing that out of anyone, she deserved it most. You thought maybe the early morning would be the best time to execute your plan; not many were awake, and you might be able to reach Sam’s room without interception from anyone else. You knew that if you had to see any sad eyes or wistful faces, you would crack and crumble to the ground before you could even get to your destination. You slipped onto the patio attached to your room before making the leap to end the race, needing a moment to collect your thoughts before the inevitable end.

You sat on a flimsy deck chair, a cigarette smouldering between your fingers as you gazed out at the city. Despite your own drowsiness still existing, the world was awake and begging you to join it. Cars passed, honking angrily at pedestrians and other drivers in hopes it would make them hurry. The sun was bright, casting a glow over the ground that made even the busiest of streets seem inviting. Sidewalks bustled, and shops were decorated with neon signs inviting potential customers inside. You wondered if when the pain passed, you could resume some semblance of normalcy that you had been craving for so long. Then, you wondered if normal would be better than your previous sense of the word with Sam by your side, taking on the world with you. As excited as you were to find out, your hands still shook with anxiety for the future.

You were not doubting your certainty of loving Sam; you knew that to be true in every sense of the phrase, and you had known it long before your revelation in the bathroom the night before. Loving Sam was one of the easiest things you had ever done, and you knew that regret for picking him was implausible. Sam had an iron grip on your heart from the minute you met him, and he showed no signs of letting go. What you were doubting was your ability to choose the right path, and your willingness to let go of Jake. As much as you loved Sam, you knew you felt it for him, too, and you were not prepared to accept that you would never have Jake again. As much as love terrified you, letting go was also high on your list of fears. But, as they say, when one door closes another one opens, and this was not a grievous end as much as it was the next chapter of your life.

You loved Jake completely, and so much so that when you thought about it for too long it made your chest ache and your head spin. He did not lack anything in the slightest, but your driving force was justified by the fact he was just too similar to you. You shared the fear of intimacy as well as commitment, and you both struggled with vulnerability and communication. Because of that, the emotions housed between you were often volatile and difficult to navigate. You were a self-assured hot headed person who needed someone to ground you, and you feared that Jake would feed into that side of you because he housed so many of the same traits. So, it was not a lack of love causing you to walk away; it was simply because you knew you had the same ability to hurt him as you did love him, just as he did for you. Loving someone means taking risks, but a risk that large could be fatal, and you were not willing to sacrifice him or yourself at the hands of pleasure.

You thought for so long that your cigarette burnt to an end before you had the chance to enjoy it, and the sun had slightly shifted positions in the sky. Now, it was shining directly on you, illuminating the extent of your sins and showcasing it to anyone who cared to watch. No matter what the right decision was, hurt was inevitable, and you all but paved the way for it to be. It was only right for you to play the game in which you thought it should be, because dragging it out any further would only be torture for everyone involved. You tossed the cigarette to the ground, not even a cherry falling out to reminisce on the fire it used to have. You felt the same, discarded and out of place as your flame slowly flickered away. Your only hope was that after the day was through, you would begin to shine brighter than ever before.

When you went back inside, Dylan was still snoring peacefully with no sign of stirring anytime soon. You chuckled at the sight, grabbing a blanket that had been pushed to the foot of the bed and gently throwing it on top of her. You stepped towards the door, letting your hand rest on the knob as you gave yourself a pep talk. You knew what needed to be done, but had doubts about your strength to do so. Underneath your hard and confident exterior, you were nothing but a mess of cowardly second-guesses and insecure assumptions. You feared that once you stepped outside, any sense you had talked into yourself would flee and never return. With a deep breath, you swung the door open and stepped outside. The silence was astounding, and it seemed to be loud enough to deafen you. The sheer emptiness of the hallway was overwhelming, and it felt like it was slowly paralyzing you as it encouraged you to run circles.

With an unsteady nature, you stepped forward in the direction of Sam’s room. You made it halfway, then had to stop and reconvene your thoughts. “Why is this so fucking hard?” You whispered to yourself, running a hand through your hair. You leaned back against the wall, inhaling deeply in hopes that it would aid you in your search for confidence. You ran your palms across the fabric of your jeans, the scratchy material sending a shiver down your spine and regulating your body. “Okay, y/n. You can do this. It’s not that hard. Just knock on his door, and take it from there.” You whispered, knowing that if anyone were to see the state you were in they might have genuine concerns about your mental well being.

Just as you were about to continue on your journey, a door swung open just ahead of you. You snapped your head up, looking in the direction of the noise as a genuine fear flooded you. It looked like Sam’s door, which only prompted you to want to run. After a few seconds, a body stepped into view, and almost all of your nerves calmed. “Oh, hey, Aaron.” You sighed, laughing at your own foolishness.

“Y/n!” His eyes lit up as if he’d won a grand prize by finding you in the hallway. “I was just coming to get you. Makes my job easy.”

“Oh, me? No, actually, I-I have something I have to-“

“I think you’re going to want to come with me.” He chuckled as he walked towards you. He held out his arm, beckoning you away from the wall.

“No, Aaron, I have something really important to do, and-“

“This is more important, I promise you.” He said, waiting for you to join him. You watched him, hesitation clear in your face as you looked between him and Sam’s door. When he raised an expecting eyebrow at you, you let out a sigh that trailed off with a groan, slumping your shoulders as you walked to join him. “I will make up for whatever I’m taking you away from, but I really think you’ll be happy to come with me.”

“Whatever you say,” you sing-songed, letting him guide you towards the elevator. You both disappeared behind the doors, leaving Sam’s room as nothing but a memory as you were transported down to the first floor. “So, what’s this about?”

“It’s a surprise.” He chuckled. “I’m just thankful you were awake so I didn’t have to fight with you.”

“Come on, Aaron. You can’t drag me away from my very important things and not even tell me what it’s about.” You complained, tapping your foot against the ground as you crossed your arms over your chest.

“Okay, how about this: I’ll tell you what we’re doing if you tell me what you were doing that was so important.” Your movements paused as you racked your brain for an answer. There was no way you were willing to tell him the true intent of your journey, and the elevator dinged before you could come up with an excuse. “That’s what I thought.” He laughed, walking out without another word. You let out a huff of annoyance as you followed behind him, but you could not argue with his clear advantage over the conversation. He led you into the lobby of the hotel, making sure you were close behind him in case you had any inkling to turn away. The room was oddly quiet for a morning; nobody seemed to be waiting impatiently to check out, nor did the staff seem hassled with work.

When you made it to the front doors, Aaron greeted the bodies that were waiting for you. You could not see past him, so who was there would come as a surprise once he stepped out of the way. When the doors swung open and your manager stepped forward to exit, your heart sunk and your stomach churned. Jake was looking down at his phone, sunglasses on and wearing what looked to be the clothes he slept in the night before. When you woke that morning, Jake was not the first brother you had hoped to have an interaction with, nor was he the one you had the courage to face. You barely had enough nerve to walk towards Sam’s room, and you knew you would not have the strength to maintain any kind of normalcy with Jake.

“Didn’t know you were coming along.” Jake smiled, joining you by the side, but his excitement did not seem to match his words. He knew you were coming, and he had been shaking with anticipation since finding out about it. This was not your idea of a worthwhile trip, not because you did not want to see Jake, but because you wanted to see him so badly that it made your chest ache. You did not know if you would make it through the day without cracking under his pressure, and you knew if you did let him back in, you would only be breaking his heart even further.

“Guess everyone’s full of surprises this morning.” You tried to smile, but it came out with more similarity to a grimace rather than anything welcoming. “Not even sure why I’m here.”

“He didn’t tell you?” You shook your head, avoiding looking over at him for as long as you could. When you felt his hand grace your lower back, you nearly jumped out of your skin. “Trust me, you’ll be happy you came.” He said, tightening his grip ever so slightly. You had to fight every molecule in your body to not give in to the touch, to lean into him and forget every single thing you had sworn to that morning, but you persevered. Even if it was with great difficulty, you still considered it as an accomplishment.

“I’ll take your word for it.” You breathed, climbing into the backseat of the vehicle they had waiting for you. He slid in beside you, closing the door gently and locking you into seclusion with him once more.

“Have I ever lied to you, Gold Dust Woman?” He asked, looking over at you. You caught his eye for the first time that morning, feeling the breath catch in your throat.

“Not yet, Jacob.” Out of all the times you wished you could be alone with him, you never once thought you would wish you could get away from him. You looked out of the tinted window, mindlessly drumming your fingers against your leg in a clear show of anxiety.

“You seem tense.” He noted, inching closer without even realizing it.

“Oh, just tired.” You lied, hoping it would ease his worry enough to give you some more time to collect yourself.

“You know you can’t lie to me, Gold Dust Woman.” He said, sneaking his hand towards you and settling it on top of your own. You closed your eyes, revealing in the intimacy that would not last long. You hated knowing that you would have to put the moment to an end even if you were enjoying it so much. No matter if you still wanted Jake, you knew that all the conclusions you had drawn were correct and of grave importance. The longer you let the dance continue, the worse the situation would end. You had hurt him enough to know that you no longer had any right to be selfish, even if you so badly wanted to.

But, delaying the inevitable had always been your area of expertise, and for simplicity’s sake, you thought it alright to do it one last time.

“Can we just… can we just be friends, today? Co-workers?” You asked, avoiding looking at his face. You knew the pain that stemmed from your words was evident and quick to surface. “Yesterday was just… it was a lot for me, and I think I just need to sort my thoughts out before jumping right back into it.”

“Friends…” he deliberated, slowly releasing his hold on your hand. “Did you just friend-zone me?” He asked, almost laughing at the incredulity of the question.

“Just for today, Jacob.” You assured him. Even if it was a lie, you knew it was for the best. Your intent was to get both of you through whatever Aaron had planned for you, and then deal with your personal matters afterwards. If you were to break the news to him so bluntly and so soon, recovery would not be possible in the near future.

“Just for today,” he pondered, looking out the window. “Don’t think we’ve ever been good at being friends, sweetheart, but for you, I’ll try my best.” And he was right. Jake had been much less of a friend than any of the other boys. For a long time, he was an active participant of the party lifestyle that was so accessible in your home, and he grew into an acquaintance. Neither of you were fond of the bonding process, and fell into routine of knowing each other while remaining strangers. Within the months leading up to his confessional session in your bedroom, you had managed to bridge the gap between stranger and friend. You were caught alone more often, sharing secret hangouts away from the others to avoid jealousy or confusion, usually filled with shared music and drunken fun. It was never anything serious, or so you thought. Now, thinking back to the few days you spent with him as a ‘friend’, it was clear to you that Jake was trying to tell you he loved you without actually needing to say the words.

You felt even worse recalling his silent show of adoration, because you realized you had always been doing the same thing to him as Sam had done to you, yet he never seemed broken or bent out of shape because of it. Jake had grown familiar with the idea of loss, but he had not let it get in his way. Friends was never in his itinerary, but when it came to making you happy, he would sacrifice everything including his own life. “So let’s try for a day,” you said, more intrigued by the idea. “Even if we suck at it, it’s worth a shot, right?” He looked back at you, thrilled that you had finally found the strength to look in his direction. He gave you a small smile, not pleased about the idea, but curious as to what it would be like. “Can you spend an entire day not trying to get me into bed?” He chuckled, holding your gaze as he thought of a response.

“That would be the ultimate test of willpower, but I suppose I could try. Do you think you can spend the whole day rejecting me if I can’t?” It was your turn to laugh, finding the nature of the conversation easygoing and comforting. You missed laughing with Jake, and you hoped that after the day was through, you would still be able to laugh with him again.

“I think I can manage.” You nodded.

“Alright, Gold Dust Woman. Friends for a day.” He said, extending his hand towards you. You grabbed it, shaking it with a little bit of force. You felt guilty knowing that he was ultimately agreeing to the loss of you, but you were enjoying the happiness too much to break his heart.

“Friends for a day, Jacob.” You reiterated, dropping your hand back to his side. The rest of the car ride was silent, both of you wondering how you would be able to separate love from your relationship. It was a daunting task, but you were both too stubborn to admit you would not be able to do it. When the car rolled to a stop in front of the venue you were supposed to play at later in the evening, you were confused as to why you needed to be here so soon.

You broke out into the day, squinting at the stinging sunlight in your eyes. You waited for Aaron to join you so you knew where you were headed. He guided you into the back entrance of the building where you immediately noticed a crowd of people much to large for so early in the day. You bit your tongue instead of inquiring about your curiosity, knowing that you would find out why you were there in only a few moments. Jake immediately found himself busy with a crowd of people who were stationed outside of his dressing room, and Aaron guided you towards your own. He had a smile stuck on his face, clearly excited to see your reaction to the news of what you would be doing. When you peered inside your room, Rachel, your stylist, was sitting inside and on her phone to pass the time. “About time you got here,” she said, looking up with a smile. “I was beginning to think that you would never show up.”

“I’m here,” you laughed, giving a small wave to serve as a greeting.

“Sit,” she ordered, directing you towards the wardrobe chair. You did as you were told, taking post in the seat as she grabbed some items from her suitcase of supplies. “We’re going to spend a lot of time together today.” She said as she ran her fingers through your hair.

“Don’t we spend lots of time together already?” You asked with a small smirk on your face.

“Today’s a special day,” she informed you, turning your chair so she could see your face. “Did nobody tell you why you’re here?”

“No, and I’m assuming by now that nobody will.” You didn’t mean to sound so annoyed, but after being pulled away from Sam so early in the morning with no good reason as to why, you couldn’t help but feel slightly put off. She laughed at your comment as your personality showed through and as usual, it didn’t bother her in the slightest.

“You look better today. Brighter, more relaxed. You sleep good last night.” Her comments hit you like a truck. You knew the last two weeks your appearance had been lacking, so run down by the exhausting back and forth you had found yourself in. Running without a destination was tiresome and pointless, but now that the finish line was in sight, you could not lie and say that you did not feel better just by seeing it. You had your energy back, and your mind was finally calmed down just by knowing that you had a real chance at happiness. Until it was in your grasp, though, you refused to accept that this was the end. Your hesitancy to accept finality was not because of doubt in your decision, but because you knew the brothers too well to think they would let this go without a last word.

“Yeah, we did sleep really good last night.” You said, closing your eyes as she began applying makeup to your face. “Think the tour life is just catching up to me.”

“Mhm,” she hummed, dusting eyeshadow over your eyes. “Or the Kiszka life, maybe?” You peeked at her through the eye she wasn’t focused on, surprised that she made such a bold comment.

“Well, they do say that you shouldn’t fall in love with your coworkers.” You said, closing your eye again. With how public your ordeal had been made, you couldn’t even find it within yourself to be upset that she was commenting on it.

“Especially not two of them.” You both shared a laugh, finding it easier to joke about it than make it into a conversation. “Don’t let them steal your shine, Gold Dust Woman. They may be special, but not as special as you.”

“I’m trying,” you assured her. Within a few moments, she was finished with your makeup and pointed you towards an outfit she had picked out for you. She allowed you to change before pinning everything in place, and only took a few moments to do your hair. “Casual today?” You asked, looking the mirror as she worked on the waves in your hair.

“Simple, but beautiful.” She said, spraying on hairspray as she continued. She styled your bangs, making sure they would stay in place before stepping away to take a look at the finished product. “What do you think?” She asked, waiting for an answer. You looked to the mirror, dawning over the detail of your makeup. It was so well done that you could barely tell you were wearing any. Your hair was perfectly in place, and your clothes matched the look effortlessly.

“Very 70’s,” you noted, looking down at the bellbottom jeans. The tank top you were wearing was very low cut, one half a burnt orange and the other a rustic brown. The fabric was connected just under your breastbone with a large gem, and the shirt settled just around your rib cage. She threw a leather jacket your way with a smile and shrug of her shoulders.

“Is that a bad thing?”

“No, it’s a great thing.” You corrected, throwing the tan coloured jacket over your shoulders.

“Then it’s showtime.” She smiled, ushering you to stand. She guided you into the hallway where groups of people were standing with cameras and sound equipment. You looked back over your shoulder at her, nervous about what was to come next. Between a cluster of bodies, you caught sight of a familiar head of hair. You felt relief flood through you, knowing that whatever Aaron was putting you up to, Jake would be there to do it with you.

He looked around, noticing you almost as soon as you emerged from your dressing room. He broke off the conversation he was stuck in, and pushed through the crowd to join you. When he was fully in your line of sight, you felt like you had been punched in the stomach from his beauty alone. He was dressed in an all white suit, a flash of his chest showing and the lower button of his shirt loose. He had a ring on his finger, a chain around his neck, and a smile on his face that matched the ethereal aura he possessed. You managed a smile to match his despite your anxiety, comforted by his familiarity and always happy to be in his company.

He joined you by your side, clearly itching to wrap an arm around you, but stuck his hand in his pocket instead. He was always open for a challenge, and if being a friend was the subject at hand, he would try his absolute best to achieve the desired outcome. “You know what we’re doing, yet?” He asked, looking down at you. Even if he was adamant on complying with (in his opinion) your ridiculous request, he could not hide the pure adoration he held for you in his eyes. It was hard to ignore, even when you weren’t looking for it, and the strength in which he felt for you nearly sent you to your knees. On top of trying to force yourself out of love with him, you had to try not to punish yourself for the choices you made. Breaking his heart was never something you intended, but it was something you both knew was a possibility.

“Dressing up and taking pictures? That’s usually all you guys do.”

“Ha,” he rolled his eyes, mocking your weak insult. “You’re so clever, you know.”

“I try.” You grinned. He was trying to ease your mind with humour, and it was working. The longer you laughed with him, the less you thought about anything else.

“Pictures will definitely be involved, but not necessarily the focus of the day.” He said, giving you a hint in hopes you would figure it out on your own. You looked around, thinking hard as your eyes gazed at the bodies in view.

“An interview?”

“There you go, sweetheart.” He nodded.

“Like, a real interview?” You asked again, the reality setting in. “For like, a magazine?”

“Mhm,” he hummed, chuckling at your excitement.

“They actually want to interview me, too?”

“Of course they do,” he said, finally reaching out and placing a friendly hand on your upper back. It did not strike you as romantic, rather just a friend sharing your elation. “I meant it when I said that you were meant for this, y/n.” Your heart warmed at his soft smile, and you couldn’t help but reach out and wrap your arm around him, too. It was not laced with any implication, much less like any other touch you shared with him previously. Instead, it was just a physical show of your appreciation for each other. Even if you were not going to end up with Jake, you knew that you had a wicked respect for him as a person and never wanted to see a lifetime without him in it. Even if you were in love with him now, you knew he had the ability to be the best friend you had ever had, and you were holding on to that knowledge to get you through the rest of the battle.

Aaron stepped towards you two, happy to see the comfortable dynamic the two of you were engaged in. He had a small fear of you two not wanting to try and get along for the occasion, especially since the last few weeks he had seen nothing but the two of you ignoring each other. “Alright, are you guys ready?” He asked.

“Yeah,” Jake nodded.

“They’re going to take some pictures first, then the two of you are going to sit and answer some questions. That sound good?”

“Together?” You asked. Aaron nodded. “Okay, sounds good.” The manager gave you both a smile, then nodded his head down the hallway as if to tell you to follow him. When he took off in a fast walk, you both followed suit without any further questions. He lead you down to a nearby room that had been cleared and set up with loads of photography equipment. There was couches off to the side, and beside the white screen for the photography background, both of your guitars were set in stands, clearly polished and shined for the occasion. “They look awfully pretty together, don’t they?” You asked, looking over at Jake. He gave a small chuckle, slowly nodding his head at your words.

“Yeah, they do.” He replied, looking off at the distance but not necessarily at the guitars in question. A sad smile crossed your lips, but you didn’t let it linger. Before you had a chance to move on from the minor hurt, a photographer was quick to join you in the room.

“Alright,” she said, looking between you both. “Let’s get some individual shots, then some together. Mr. Kiszka, we’ll do yours first, if that’s okay.”

“After you, Mr. Kiszka,” you noted, a laugh stuck in your throat. You stepped to the side, allowing him to take the centre of attention. It wasn’t long before she was positioning him and snapping pictures. Some of them on his lonesome, but mostly of him with his SG. You were thankful for Jake’s growing collection; after the tragic loss of his SG due to the altercation between him and Sam, he at least had a backup to play for the meantime. You couldn’t hide your smile as he posed, finding yourself lost in the small details of his face. Even if you knew that a relationship with Jake was not in your future, you couldn’t deny his blinding beauty. His presence took up all of the space in the room, and you couldn’t find it within yourself to complain. You didn’t mind living in Jake’s shadow for the day, as a guitarist and as a person, because he deserved the attention. His talent and his personality was well deserving of recognition, and you were happy to witness it first hand.

“You’re up,” Jake said, placing his guitar back on the stand.

“Okay.” You nodded, making a move to stand in his previous position. You tried to relax yourself as much as you could, lowering your shoulders and putting on a blinding smile. The flash from the camera was overwhelming every time it went off, but you tried your best to not let it bother you. She took a few pictures of you in different positions, getting your best angles before asking you to grab your guitar. You did so, carefully holding it in your hands and positioning it as she asked you to. Eventually, she asked Jake to join you. He grabbed his SG, waiting for her to direct him further. She stepped forward, guiding him towards you and placing you back to back. She helped you position your arms to show off the instruments before taking a step back to see if she needed to change anything.

You were standing, leaning against each other as you held your guitars upright, slightly turned to face the camera. She took a few with no smiles, and a few with. You couldn’t lie and say that you weren’t thrilled about the outcome; she showed you both the product of her work, and you had fallen in love with the last picture. You were both standing in the same position, guitars shining brightly under the studio lighting, and you had smiles on your faces so large that you would never be able to guess there was any turmoil beneath the surface. Your eyes were glistening with the joy of being with each other. Despite the impending heartache, you had to stop and appreciate the moment of warmth. It was a memory you would long remember, likely until the end of your time, and the fondness would be solely accredited to Jake.

“Can we get a copy of that one?” Jake asked, feeling the exact same as you did about the picture.

“I can edit it before I send it, if you’d rather me do that.” She offered, but he was already shaking his head before she finished speaking.

“No, that’s okay.” He said, looking to you in hopes you agreed.

“Yeah, just like that is fine.” You nodded.

“Alright, sounds good to me. I’ll get started, and the interviewer will be here in a few minutes.” She said, smiling at the two of you. “Thanks, guys.”

“Thank you,” you said, head still spinning at the idea of being plastered on a magazine. Jake placed a gentle hand on your back once more and guided you towards the couches as the photographer left the room.

“See, that wasn’t bad.” He offered, taking a seat first. You sat down behind him, shaking your head.

“It was so cool.” You tried to hide your own gushing about the situation, but it was evident in your features. He laughed at your face, unable to hide his feelings for you as he did so. He settled back on the couch, fighting every urge to touch you in hopes that you might give in first. You settled back, too, also finding it difficult to keep your hands off him. You hoped that once the truth was spoken and the storm had passed, the desire to be with him would somehow disappear.

A few moments later, a young woman stepped in, different from the one who took your pictures. Behind her, there was a crew of people with audio equipment who would take care of the filming. She moved to greet you, shaking both of your hands and introducing herself. She settled on the chair beside the couch, pulling out a clipboard from her bag. “Alright, I won’t take up too much of your time. We just wanted to ask a few questions for the next issue of Guitar World. This tour is the talk of the town, and Gold Dust Woman is one of the biggest up and coming bands around.” She smiled at you as she finished her statement. You thought you were going to choke on your own shock, your heart racing and your eyes widening as you tried to process what she was saying. You had no idea the interview was for ‘Guitar World’, and you had no idea that you had gained enough popularity for such a prestigious magazine to know you by name. “They’re going to film, just so I have the interview on record to write the article later, so don’t mind them.”

“Sounds good to me.” Jake smiled, eyes lingering on the interviewer for a second too long. You noticed, shamed at the rush of jealousy you felt flood your body. You had no right to feel such things about him anymore, and you needed to get yourself out of that headspace as soon as possible.

“So, if you guys are ready, we can get started.” She offered. You both gave a nod, not finding any argument for the statement. “Perfect.” She said, settling back in her chair and giving a thumbs up to the staff running the filming. One they gave her the go-ahead, she started slow, getting you both to state your names and your band’s names. After that, she jumped right into the bulk of the questions. She started with Jake, asking a few simple things about their new album and their plans for the future. She noted the Grammy nomination they had received very recently, and inquired about his excitement on the topic. Eventually, she turned to you and began her deep dive into your musical career. “So, y/n, you and your band seemed to come out of nowhere; have you been a band for long, or is this something new for you?”

“Well, we’ve been a band for quite some time now, but we mostly played at local bars and restaurants around home. We’ve always been fond of the idea of doing something more, but never really had the chance to do it until now.”

“That’s fantastic,” she noted, making sure you knew she was listening. “Now, ‘Gold Dust Woman’, is that a play on the infamous Fleetwood Mac song, or does it mean something more to you?”

“I suppose both,” you chuckled. “I’ve always been a huge fan of their music, and Stevie Nicks in particular, but I was actually given the nickname a while back by a very important person to me. When we agreed to tour with Greta, we hadn’t really talked about an official name. I brought up the idea and they all seemed to love it. From there it was history, I guess.”

“So it’s almost like you get to carry a part of that person with you wherever you go?”

“Yeah,” you nodded, unable to hide the smile that was forming. “I owe a lot to that person, even outside of music, too. They helped me get to where I am today, and I couldn’t think of a better way to thank them for it.” You tried not to look over at Jake, wanting to avoid any sneaking suspicions from the public that it was him you were talking about.

“How has touring been so far for you? You said this was your first time?”

“Yeah, it is. It’s been fantastic so far. Seeing the world, spending time with my best friends and doing the things we love most… I couldn’t have asked for better.”

“Do you have any plans for an album for yourself?” She inquired.

“We definitely talk about it, but we don’t really have a label or anything of the sorts. I’m actually a recording artist when I’m not on stage, so if we do something, I can see it just being a private event for us.”

“I think now you’ll have labels fighting for you; the energy you have on stage is electric, and I don’t need to mention the talent, because that’s just a given.” You laughed, feeling your cheeks heat with a blush at her statement.

“Thank you,” you replied, trying to ease your nerves as you spoke. “That’s the dream, really. Music has always been a passion, and to think we have a shot at doing it full time is absolutely mind blowing.”

“I think we’re all wondering about your relationship with Greta. Have you been friends for long, or only in the recent months?”

“Oh, yeah. We’ve been friends for years, now. It’s been really cool touring with friends, because even when we’re exhausted, the work still doesn’t feel like work. Just like a little family living life together.” She smiled at the statement, nodding along with your words. Then, she turned her attention to Jake.

“What are your thoughts on the matter?”

“Oh, me?” Jake asked. “I agree wholeheartedly. Given the opportunity to work so closely with such fantastic people has been nothing short of remarkable. They’re all very passionate about their work, and they have proven to us beyond anything we ever expected that they were meant for that stage. It’s been an honour to work so closely with them, and if I could have it my way, I’d tour with them for the rest of our careers.” You looked over at him, a small blush dusting your cheeks at his kind words.

“You guys really seem to fit together in terms of visuals; has there been any hardships along the way? I know that sometimes everything might not be as perfect as it seems.” After a moment, he gave a slow shake of his head.

“No, not that I can think of. The benefit of working with people who you connect with on a higher level is that even when we struggle and all of our ideas seem to clash, we always come out stronger.” He said, confident in his answer. “I can’t speak for the future, but so far, it’s been delightful and almost cathartic in a way to connect with people who live and feel the same way about life as we do.”

“Awesome,” she grinned. “And of course, this might be a loaded question, but from one musician’s perspective on another, what is your opinion on Gold Dust Woman?” He drew in a long breath, leaning his head back for a moment as he thought about his answer. Eventually, he looked over at you while he collected his thoughts, then looked back at the interviewer.

“I think that they embody the spirit of what music used to be, and in todays age, that’s incredibly hard to find. As a musician, I have so much respect for their work and the energy they put into it and as a guitarist, I feel like there is so much that I learn from her all of the time. It’s wonderful to share a love for something so beautiful, especially when it’s something we can teach each other more about every day. I’m grateful for her talent and all of the ideas that she brings to the table, because watching her work her magic on that fretboard has inspired me to work harder with mine.”

“You seem quite fond of her,” she noted. Jake let out a small laugh, nodding his head.

“Yeah, you could say that. She’s more than my colleague; she’s my best friend. Family, even. I mean look at her up on that stage when she performs. It’s like she’s the modern day Stevie Nicks. I hear it in her voice, in the passion and the love for music, but it see it in her eyes and her heart. She’s got this aura that follows her around wherever she goes. It screams rock and roll, and power, and all of the other wonderful things that come with it. No matter who you are, I think it’s hard not to admire her when she’s doing what she loves most. And aside from the talent, she’s just a great person, and I can confidently speak for all of us when I say that it’s been an incredibly inspiring experience to be able to work with her.”

You could not seem to tear your eyes away from him as he spoke, your throat constricting and your eyes threatening tears. You had never heard words from Jake that were quite like the ones he spoke, then. They were full of truth and more profound than anything you had ever heard before. You never would have believed someone could speak about you with such admiration, and the fact that he was willing to admit it to the world was overwhelming. You had to pry your eyes away from him, feeling yourself falling in love all over again despite knowing that you couldn’t have him like that, anymore. You had made your decision, and you had to stick with it. It was the only way you would make it out alive.

“How do you feel on that subject?” She asked you, pulling you out of the trance you were stuck in.

“I couldn’t agree more,” you shrugged. “I mean, Jake is a phenomenal guitarist and working so closely with someone who can create magic with an instrument has been enlightening and encouraging. Despite popular belief, it’s never been a deterrent for me to work with someone who is so skilled. If anything, it’s been a huge benefit, and I find everything he does it’s very influential. When I feel like I should give up, I can look to him and find the inspiration to keep going. He teaches me just as much about music as I have for him, and as a musician, I envy the talent he has. I hope that I continue to have the opportunity to grow and play alongside of him, and that I can continue to know him as a person. We owe our success as a band to Greta, but I owe my success as a guitarist to him.” You could feel him staring, but you did your best to fight the pressure to look back.

“My final question for you guys is quite a simple one; we couldn’t call ourselves a guitar magazine if we didn’t ask the most important question of all. What guitars do you both play?” You both laughed at the simple nature of the inquiry, looking to each other to see who wanted to go first.

“I have a 61’ Gibson SG. Although, back when they first produced the line of guitars, they sold them under the name Les Paul. It’s my go to, and my pride and joy. I have a few other ones I use, but that guitar is definitely my number one.”

“I mainly use my 57’ reissue. It’s a Les Paul Gold Top style, and it’s been my tried and true since I started writing music.”

“Alright,” she grinned. “Thank you both so much, it’s been a pleasure speaking with you. I hope to talk again sometime, and I hope that the rest of the tour brings just as much happiness as the first half has seemed to. Maybe next time we see each other, you’ll have a new record for us to fawn over.” She told you.

“Thank you so much.” You said, reaching out to shake her hand. Jake did the same, and the both of you settled back in your seat as the crew filed out of the room. You let out a long sigh, heart still pounding in your chest. When the room was empty aside from the pair of you, you finally turned to look at him. “Did you mean all of that?”

“Of course I did, Gold Dust Woman.” He whispered. “Did you?”

“Yeah,” you nodded, feeling the sting of heartbreak begin to make its appearance once again. You had no idea how to let him go after he said such beautiful things about you. He checked the clock on the wall, noting the time of day before he spoke again.

“Did you want to grab some lunch before soundcheck?” He asked. “As friends, of course.” He added, making sure you were aware he was still adhering to the agreement.

“That sounds like fun.” You agreed, almost wishing that you did not agree to be friends for the day. The longer you spent with him, the more your morals seemed to disappear.

“I’ll go get changed, then we can go?” You nodded, unable to speak any more words without either ending things forever or professing undying love for him, and neither seemed like an option you wanted for yourself. Without any other conversation, he stood and left you on your lonesome.

You leaned back into the cushions of the couch, praying that they would swallow you whole and hopefully end your incessant misery. You knew that going out with Jake would only worsen your predicament, but you couldn’t seem to refuse the offer. Much like the beginning, he was irresistible in his charm and impossible to forget. You weren’t even sure if the devil or the angel was behind the decision, and you didn’t seem to care enough. Whether good or bad, you were bound to enjoy the experience anyway. If you had to leave him, you would at least have one good memory to end the experience with. You settled your shaking hands, satiating your thoughts with empty promises to yourself as you stood. You knew that in no way was entertaining any further relationship with Jake the right thing to do, but you were just too much of a coward to confess it.

You walked into the hallway, almost immediately running into Aaron. He gave you a pat on the back and a few words of gratitude for your cooperation. You made it a note to genuinely thank him later on once the turmoil in your heart had settled. You walked towards Jake’s dressing room, waiting patiently for him to finish up. You did not have to wait for long, because within a few moments, his door swung open and he was back in your company dressed in his regular clothes. He had a pair of sunglasses settled low on his nose and a lazy smile on his lips. It only took a few seconds for sandalwood to choke you and your sin to catch up in time for the kill.

Wordlessly, you walked out of the back door of the venue. You headed in the direction of the street in search of somewhere to eat. The sidewalks were barren in contrast to the cars passing by, and you only had to walk for a short while before you came across a strip of buildings. There were a few local shops, but your eyes landed on a coffee shop that peaked your interest so much that you couldn’t bother to see what else the town had to offer. Jake noticed your expression, not needing to ask if that’s where you wanted to go. When it came to caffeinated beverages, you were always the first in line. He led the way to the front door, opening it for you and allowing you to go inside.

The vibe in the air was immediately calming and the smell of coffee filled your nose. You let out an audible sigh of relief just knowing that you would have one in your hand soon enough. Jake stood beside you in line, silent but relaxed as you both looked over the menus. “What do you want to eat?” He asked, turning his head to look over at you.

“I think the ham and cheddar looks good,” you noted before looking to the next board. “Oh, they have soup!” You exclaimed, keeping your voice quiet. He had to laugh at the glee you felt for such a simple idea. Before you could say anything else, he took a step towards the cashier. You followed behind him, but clearly didn’t need to aid him in ordering. He listed off your coffee, the sandwich and your favourite soup out of the list they were offering. He ordered for himself and paid before you could even think to grab your wallet. “You didn’t have to do that, Jake.”

“I know, I wanted to.” He assured you, moving down the line to wait for the order. When everything was ready, you both carried the items to a secluded booth in the corner. When you sat down, silence became you once more as if it were your destiny to have so much to say but be unable to speak it. You were so wound up with anxiety that you found it difficult to begin eating. Instead, you sipped at your coffee and found yourself delighted at the taste. Once again, he proved to you his ability to remember the details that nobody else cared to look for. “Oh, I almost forgot,” he noted, grabbing his phone from his pocket. He was occupied with the screen only for a moment before you felt your own vibrate. You grabbed it, checking the message he had sent you. There was an attachment, and when you clicked on it you felt a whole new wave of shame wash over you. It was the picture the two of you had gotten together during the photoshoot. “She emailed it to me during the interview. Figured you might want it too.”

“I do, thank you.” You muttered, never letting your eyes move from the photograph. It was an infinite reminder of the elation the two of you felt when around each other, and it would forever haunt you because you knew you had to let it go.

“Speak your truth, Gold Dust Woman.” He said, taking a bite of his own food.

“What do you mean?” You asked, cracking the lid of the disposable soup container.

“Something is on your mind.”

“No, I’m okay.” You shook your head, another punch of guilt thrown when you saw he had somehow also known what your favourite soup was. He seemed to know everything about you without you ever needing to speak the words, and it seemed like every higher power had intent to punish you, and they were doing their job splendidly.

“How many times do I have to tell you, you can’t lie to me, y/n.” You looked up to meet his eye, immediately crushed under the weight of his stare. You had to correct your previous thought; it was not the picture that would haunt you for a lifetime, but rather him as a whole. How strange it felt to be haunted by someone was still alive, but that was exactly how it felt to be in his presence in that moment.

“What do you want me to say, Jake?”

“Anything,” he pleaded, although not blatantly apparent in his desperation for an answer. “You didn’t ask me to be friends for a day because you can’t make a decision; you asked me to be friends today because you already have, and it’s not me.”

“No, Jake.” You shook your head hoping he would see reason. You hated that he could decode every lie and half-truth that came out of your mouth before you even spoke it. “It’s not like that,” it was like that, but you were nowhere near ready to profess it.

“Then what is it, sweetheart?” His voice was not condescending, nor angry. It was inquisitive, like he just needed to know what the truth was.

“I don’t know,” you sighed, closing your eyes to block out the tears that were begging to be shed. “I know that it hurts, but I don’t know where it hurts. It doesn’t stop, and I don’t think it ever will. And I know that we suck at being friends, because I’ve spent the entire day falling more in love with you than I ever was before. You get on camera, and you say those sweet things that nobody else has ever thought about me, and you look at me like I’m the best thing to walk this earth, but I’m not, Jake. I’m far from it, and you need to realize that, too.”

“So that’s your plan? You want me to stop loving you so you don’t have to pull away, first?” He knew, and he knew from the minute he saw you. You couldn’t back down and you couldn’t run away. He had you cornered, and you felt like you were going to snap under the pressure. “If so, that’s never going to happen, angel. I’ve loved you quietly for years, and I can keep loving you quietly while I hope you come back. Falling out of love with you has never been an option, so I’ll learn to live with it, even if it hurts.”

“And I’ll love you forever, even if it hurts.” You said, a grimace taking hold on your lips. “I can’t figure out how to stop loving you.”

“Then why are you trying if you haven’t made up your mind?” You looked up, tears blurring your vision as they landed on his face. He had locked you into stalemate yet again. You wished that you didn’t have to feel it anymore, but you felt everything. The pain sprinkled with regret, the shame mixed with sadness, and the love coated with desire. You felt everything for him, but you knew you shouldn’t. It was a terrible game to play, the one in which you tried to differentiate between right and wrong, especially when it came to him. From the very beginning, the rights felt wrong with Jake and the wrongs felt right. When in his company, you had no idea how to draw the line between needs and wants, and you had no idea how to implement any sort of morality when he was more powerful than any sin or holy force. “You can say the words, y/n. I can take it.”

“I don’t want to.” You shook your head.

“You have to.” He said, defeat clear in his face. He had lost, and he needed to hear you say it in order to begin to heal from the wounds.

“Jake,” you sighed, hands shaking as you reached for your coffee cup “don’t do this, now. That’s not why I came here with you.”

“Maybe it’s why I came, y/n.” He offered the idea, knowing that you hadn’t yet thought of that possibility. “I love you, and you know that, but if I’m not what you want anymore, I need to learn how to be your friend. It’s going to suck, but it’s something I have to do, and I have to start now if I’m ever going to be able to do it.”

“I love you,” you whispered, biting the inside of your lip to stop the tears from falling.

“But you love him more.” He said, watching your face to try and understand if he was reading the situation right. “It’s okay, angel.”

“It’s never been about that,” you shook your head. “It’s not about loving someone more, or even wanting someone more. It’s just been about what feels right, and what you and I have been doing is fantastic, but it’s just as hard as it is good. I don’t know if I can do that for the rest of my life.” Your heart ached for him, and the pain that was clear in his eyes. He had no fight left in him, and neither did you. It was a horrible thing to say, but it was the truth. You and Jake had been no stranger to struggle, and perhaps the complications lied within the lust that so often overshadowed your emotional need. You had forgone the emotional connection in hopes that sex would solve it for you, but the truth of the matter was that you both had no idea how to love one another despite feeling it so strongly. The good days were great, but the bad days were horrible. Days of ignoring each other, the name calling and yelling all pointed straight to failure.

You knew you could love Jake forever, but the work that you would need to do was extensive, and the idea alone sounded exhausting. He was worth the work, but the knowledge that heartbreak was still such a huge possibility if you chose him was a major deterrent. It was not a lack of love that was driving you away, rather just your fear getting in the way once more. If it were any normal type of pain, you would be able to see past it, but heartbreak over Jake was entirely new type of pain that was worse than any other.

“That’s okay, Gold Dust Woman.” He assured you, but you saw a glisten of tears in his eye. It was gutting, and you had to look away to stop yourself from crying, too. “We tried our best, and that’s what matters.” He cleared his throat, trying to cover the quiver in his voice, but you noticed it more than you heard the words he was saying. “No matter if you’re with me or not, you are the fire that burns in my heart, y/n. It has been a privilege to love you, and I really hope that maybe I’ll get the chance to love you again someday.”

“Jake,” you pleaded for him to stop. Your heart could not take the weight of his grief, and you were certain if he continued, you would succumb to the temptation of loving him.

“I get to speak my mind, too.” He defended himself. “I love you so much, y/n. More than I ever thought I could, and I’m happy if you’re happy. Loving you has never been a selfish thing for me; I do it even knowing that it could hurt me, because your happiness is above everything else. I’m just grateful to have spent time with you at all.”

“I love you, Jake.” You said, reaching out for his hand that was resting on the table. “I keep thinking that things would be easier if we did this the right way, but there is no right way, and it hurts no matter what I do. I’m trying to convince myself that it’s okay that this wasn’t for us, but it kills me. I wanted it for us so badly, but sometimes things just don’t work out.”

“I know, angel.” He said, running his thumb over the back of your hand. “Thank you for being honest with me.”

“Can we… just wait until we’re back at the venue? One last date, in love and happy.” You asked, but it was more like begging. You could bear the weight of the separation yet, and you would do anything to delay the inevitable.

“You don’t look very happy, baby.” He said, reaching across the table and swiping a tear away with his free hand. You closed your eyes, fighting back a sob as he held your face in his hand.

“I’m with you, so of course I am.” You breathed, but more tears fell just from speaking the lie of happiness.

“Come on, beautiful. Look at me.” He said, voice so quiet that it barely broke through the air of misery. You did as he wanted, eyes opening only to be met with his own saddened face. “Dates are supposed to be fun, there’s no need for tears.” His comfort served little purpose, because there was one falling down his own cheek as he tried to calm you. You lifted your hand, settling it atop of the one he had on your cheek. You managed a small smile through the mess of tears, uncaring for the public display of emotion.

“You’re right,” you sniffled, nodding your head. You wiped your face clean, taking a breath to calm yourself down. “Dates are meant to be fun.”

“So much for friends,” he chuckled, wiping his own cheek free of tears.

“I told you, we sucked at it anyway.”

“We did.” He agreed. “Destined to be lovers, stuck being friends.” He attempted to make the joke, but the reality of his words was harsh. You took another drink of coffee, hoping the beverage would warm your soul and give you the energy to make it through the day.

You both got lost in small chatter, ignoring the outside world and choosing to remain in the little comfortable bubble you had created in the cafe. Inside, nothing could hurt. At that table, you were free to love each other forever and never have to worry about stopping. Outside, the cold world would put an end to the relationship you had worked so hard to save. You wished you could stay in the cafe until the end of time, with Jake and away from any other worldly trouble, but it was just not plausible. Eventually, when both of your phones began to ring, you knew you had to move on and let go. Letting go was the hardest part of living, but you knew you had to face it sooner or later. You could only hope that when the storm cleared you could both move on and better yourselves from the mistakes you had made with each other, but the thought of learning from your mistakes with Jake only to use the lessons with another was sickening. As much as you knew that you needed to, letting him walk away was terrifying, and the thought of him loving another was gut wrenching.

When it came time to leave, you both were dragging your feet walking out the door. With his hand in yours, you began the slowest walk of your life, using a snails pace to avoid the inevitable end that came with your arrival. The building came into view like a grim foreshadowing of the future. Before your reached the door, you had to stop him in hopes of savouring one more moment of peace. You turned to face him, hand still resting in his own as you tried to catch his eye. His gaze seemed glued to the ground, fearful of looking up at you in case you caught sight of his weakness. “I love you, Jake.” You whispered, snaking your arm around his neck. He pulled you into him by your hip, so close to your face that your noses were brushing together.

“You could take any type of love, multiply by a million, and you still would only have a glimpse of how I feel about you.” Your heart was shattered, all of the pieces lying sharp in your chest and stabbing into you with every breath you took. You leaned forward, kissing him softly as a show of affection, but also as an apology for the pain you caused. For a few beautiful seconds the world seemed right, but as always, it had to come to and end. He placed another soft kiss to your lips, just like rubbing salt in a wound. “I’ll always be here, Gold Dust Woman. If you ever change your mind… I’m here.”

“You’ve always been too good for this world, Jake. I’m so sorry that I couldn’t be more for you.” He shook his head, face still unbearably close to your own.

“You are everything, angel.” He corrected, not willing to accept any slander towards you. “In another world, you and I are happy together. Just because it’s not this one doesn’t mean that you aren’t enough for me. Maybe you’re just too much, and I don’t know how to appreciate all of it yet.” He leaned up and pressed a kiss to your forehead, lingering for a moment too long. He had to force himself away from you, knowing that it was doing nothing but hurting you both more. “Thank you for everything, y/n. These last few months have been so amazing, and it’s all because of you.”

“Thank you, Jake. You have no idea how much you’ve done for me.” He gave a tight lipped smile and a curt nod, knowing he shouldn’t continue feeding into the conversation, but wanting it more than anything.

“Here’s to being friends, Gold Dust Woman.”

“To being friends,” you let out a shaky breath, feeling the tears begging to make a return. You both let your stare linger for a moment longer before you eventually took a step towards the building. He watched you walk away, desperate for you to stay but unable to muster the courage to say it. He knew the most amicable thing was to let you go, but it was horrendous for him knowing that once you walked through that door, you would never be his again.

You nearly broke down the door with the strength you used to open it, tears flooding your cheeks once again as you walked towards your dressing room. As you stepped inside, you managed to stop your sobs just enough to catch your breath. Unfortunately for you, it was not enough to evade the questions of the person who took post in your room, waiting for your return.

“Y/n? What’s wrong?” You looked up, shock and sadness written all over you with no way to hide it. As if the universe was playing a trick, another violent lesson after your months of nothing but learning, Sam was sat on your couch, looking up at you with major concern.

“Fuck, Sam.” You swore, wiping your face free of the mascara stains. “You scared me.” That was not what you truly wanted to say; in fact, you wanted to send him away and cry in solitude, to tend to your wounds without an audience, but you thought that maybe his comfort was exactly what you needed. The rainbow shining after the storm, sitting on your couch waiting for you just to prove that life could still be beautiful despite the pain.

“Sorry, Princess. I didn’t mean to.”

“It’s okay,” you shook your head, taking a step towards him. “It’s okay, I’m okay, everything is okay.” You promised, but you were trying to convince yourself of the fact more than anything else. “I’m glad you’re here, I’ve been trying to find the time to talk to you all day.” You chuckled, shaking your head at the days events.

“Well, I’m here now.” He assured you, standing to meet you. He reached out, drawing you in to him with an open arm and an invitation. You gravitated towards him, throwing your arms around his neck and pulling him into a hug. He responded with the same energy, holding you tightly and revelling in the warmth of your touch. You settled your head on his chest, taking a deep breath to relax your mind. In his arms, it felt like the war was over; you had won, and it was time to go home and rest. “Oh, I got you a coffee. I heard you were here early this morning, so I figured you didn’t have time to stop and grab one for yourself.” He said, pulling back from you only slightly. Your heart warmed at his words, comforted by the idea of him thinking of you.

“Thank you, Sammy.” You smiled, already feeling the pain begin to melt away.

“Oh, and congratulations on the interview.” He grinned, reaching behind him to grab the cup sitting on the table. “I know we’re supposed to be keeping our distance, but I just had to come and see you. Being on the cover of Guitar World is a huge deal, and I’m so happy for you.”

“It’s okay, I’m happy you’re here.” You assured him, feeling your heart speed as you prepared to confess all of the things you had been waiting to tell him.

“Me, too.” He smiled, handing you the coffee that was still hot. “I’m always happy to see you.” You closed your eyes, letting the cup warm your hands as you mustered the courage to speak. Before you said a word, you brought the lid to your lips and took a long sip of the beverage. As you swallowed it down, you almost grimaced at the taste, immediately looking down at the lid. “Oh, shit. I’m sorry.” He laughed, shaking his head. “I couldn’t remember how you liked it, so I got some cream and sugar on the side.” He said, suddenly recalling the bag of items that was also laying on the table.

You felt frozen, your eyes stuck on the lid marked with nothing but a big, bold red flag. The blood drained from your face, leaving you pale while dread seeped in to take its place. The interaction, although small, spoke louder than anything had before. A flash of memories took over you, recalling all of the coffee cups presented to you from Jake in the past, all marked with hearts and smiles, and the exact order that you would have had if you bought it yourself. You thought you might be sick, your stomach churning with unease and anxiety as you continued to stare down at the cup in your hands. The interaction was earth-shattering, making it obvious to you of one horrific thing; Sam knew you, and that was true, but just not enough. After months of dates at cafe’s and restaurants, he couldn’t seem to remember the simplest of things, and for some reason, the fact was abhorrent for you to choke down.

Sam knew you, but he did not know you as well as Jake did, and after all of this time, he was still not the one for you.

You had spent so much of your life wishing that Sam would notice you, that he would suddenly become the person you had always hoped he could be, but it was all too much to ask of him. All of those months ago, the euphoria of finally hearing that he cared about you the same as you felt about him seemed to overshadow the reality of the situation. Your love for Sam had clouded your judgement in the worst way possible, so much so that you had put him in a pedestal and opted to ignore every flaw and red flag, just so you could continue viewing him as this perfect person you had created in your mind. If Sam wanted you so badly, he would have cared enough to notice how bad you wanted him. He would have taken the step, crushed the fear of rejection and loss so he could have his chance to be with you, but he did not. He waited until the very last second to speak, until you were emotionally vulnerable and unable to see the difference. Sam loved you, and you loved him, but it was never enough to make the difference. If Sam was meant to be with you, the universe would have allowed it long before now, and it never would have sacrificed Jake in the process.

As much as you hoped Sam was the one, he was not, and your former self wept for the person you wished he could be. You were such a fool for Sam that you disregarded every warning the higher powers had been trying to show you. Jake making his move on you that night was not a cruel trick, nor a joke made by the universe to laugh at your struggle. It was a sign and even more so, a reminder that if Sam was meant to be yours, he would be. It was the universe begging for you to move on, to actually see the world you had been missing out on due to your blind loyalty to someone who refused to notice you. Jake approached you that night because he loved you wholly and selflessly, the same way you had been loving his brother. He took the chance despite knowing you were foolishly in love with someone else, and he did it with strength and courage, even if he knew he was bound to lose sooner or later.

Choosing Sam was not a way to avoid heartbreak; it was only the beginning of a lifelong struggle with what-if’s. Sam had the opportunity to love you for years, but never managed to take the leap. Jake loved you so much and so quietly that it killed him, and when he finally understood he couldn’t just stop loving you, he found the courage to confess despite his own fear of vulnerability. By choosing Sam, you would only be admitting to your inability to grow and change, and you wouldn’t be facing up to any fears that you had been trying so hard to conquer. Loving Jake had risk, but real love always did, and he was more than worth the risk. If you truly grew as much as you believed you did, you would have recognized that your fear was for good reason, but nothing close to what you previously thought it was; you weren’t scared of Jake breaking your heart, you were afraid of losing the only person in the world you had ever genuinely loved with every single part of you. It was not a fear of hurt, rather a fear of failure, but in that moment, you knew you loved Jake enough to make anything work. Failure wasn’t an option, because you would die before losing him.

As you sat, staring at the coffee in your hands, you challenged every single thing you had ever believed in. When you looked up at Sam, you knew that you had made a mistake. Sam was not your person, and he never would be, but you had already broken the heart that had sacrificed everything for you. With little hope and little faith, you knew you had to right your wrongs one last time, to atone for the sins you had been recklessly committing for weeks. You had already broken two hearts, and now you had to break a third before ever having a chance at peace. You knew you had to, but the struggle lied within finding the strength to do so. Your only solace was in the idea that you may still be able to salvage the relationship with Jake, and that after so much heartbreak, you might actually be able to mend two back together.

It was time to pick up the pieces and go home, and home was a person, this time, and not the one you previously thought it to be. Jake had always been home to you even if you failed to realize it, and your only hope was that home still had his heart open to you. If not, you wondered if you had the right words to get Jake to find room in his life again for a Gold Dust Woman, because his Gold Dust Woman was more than ready to love him for the rest of her life.

pale shadow of a woman, black widow, pale shadow of a dragon, dust woman

haven’t i always said that it’s not over until it’s over? ;)

TAGLIST: @itsdannysworld @gretavansara @jaketlove @laneygvf @freefallthoughts @psychedelicsprinkles @idontwannabeherenow @joshysgirl @sanguinebats @objectsinspvce @klarxtr @sinarainbows @jakesmustache @gvfpal @hellowgoodbye @profitofthedune

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nightsadness · 17 days

Text

Can I come with you?

Tags: fem!reader, angst

Pairing: Fyodor Dostoevsky x fem!reader

Warning: The death of a canon character, the reader longs greatly. There may be errors in the text, as I am not a native English speaker, I often had to use the help of a translator

A/n: I was inspired by the song "Ap$ent - Можно я с тобой? (Can I come with you?)" and wrote this headcanon based on the verses of that wonderful song. As I wrote above, I don't speak English, so I used a lot of translators, trying to write normally 😞. Please let me know if it's really bad.

Горят фонари Я бы до зари с тобой мог говорить

The street lights are on

I'd chat you up till dawn

Though you were no match for Dostoevsky in intellect, Fyodor thought you were an smart person with whom he could have a good conversation. In those rare moments when the man gave you time, you could talk for hours, mostly on quiet evenings, against the window, which was not covered by curtains, and thanks to this, the room was illuminated only by the bright light of the moon, giving its own special, peaceful atmosphere.

Но тебе снова пора Как всегда, какие-то дела с утра But it's high time for you to be gone

You've got work to do, as well known

You and Fyodor spent very little time together. You didn't like it, but there was nothing you could do about it. After all, Dostoevsky was obsessed only with his goal, and it was his first priority. You couldn't deny it. And you, no matter what, wanted to be with him and always waited for him.

Longing was your frequent companion when you felt the lack of a man's attention, but you didn't bother him, realizing the importance of his "purpose" realizing how much own plans meant to him. Every day you woke up and went to sleep alone. Though there were exceptions when Fyodor lay down with you, but, as a rule, in the early morning he was no longer in bed. And those moments were so rare that you could count them on your fingers.

Да, тут так себе вайб Видимо, пора. Ну что ж, бывай, родны край!

Yes, the vibes here're better be kept at bay

So, my land, bye-bye! Seams, it's time to go away...

That was the day. The day when you saw Fyodor for the last time in your life, but you hoped with all your might that it wasn't true. You couldn't even sleep for a few nights, thinking about him all the time. And you were not comforted by the thought that Fyodor was so damn cunning and clever, and he always had everything under control. Every day was a nightmare for you, because those damned thoughts were tormenting you from the inside.

По кустам ночной тропой Да, план отстой. Nocturnal trail is truly long

Yes, the plan is sucks

You heart sank into my heels, and there was a look of pure shock mixed with sadness on my face. You didn't want to believe that Fyodor was dead. How, HOW the hell could this have happened? Your breathing quickened at the news, and you fell helplessly to your knees, clutching your head with your hands. You'd always known his plan was a really sucks, and you'd even said Fyodor about it. But he didn't care what you thought of his goal.

To get your thoughts together, you decided to go for a walk. It was a blue night and a cool breeze was blowing. That's what you needed..

Всё давно позади Но зато есть вспомнить что и что обсудить

All in the past, the deeds we tried

But there are things to call to mind

It had been about six months, but you still wanted to be with Fyodor, to hold him again, to kiss him, to listen to him. You missed his attention, which he gave you, though rarely, but still gave it to you. Maybe he didn't really love you, and you were just a pawn...or maybe not? But that didn't bother you much. You wanted to be with him and only him. It's hard without him. So hard, such unbelievable pain. Every single day you remembered all the moments with him, that was your only consolation.

Если решишь уйти на покой Вдруг раньше, чем я — постой

If you decide to leave peace

before I do, hold on...

One day you were sitting on the roof of a high-rise building, looking up at the night sky, rubbing the pendant that Dostoevsky had given you. You never took it off, especially since the man was gone from your life. The longing was eating you from the inside out, but you had to be strong! Hah....You couldn't. Or just didn't want to, who knows. Your gaze was downward, the city seemed so small, and people walked around below like ants. Building was too high and you were sitting on the very edge. but it didn't scare you.

— Можно я с тобой?

#Spotify #fyodor dostoyevsky bsd #bungou stray dogs fyodor #fyodor dostoevsky #bsd fyodor #fyodor bsd #fyodor x reader #fyodor dostoevsky x you #fyodor dostoevsky x reader #fyodor bsd x reader #bsd #bungou stray dogs x reader #bungou stray dogs #bungo stray dogs x reader

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silent-raven13 · 8 months

Text

You're my Habichuelas to my Beans on Toast! 😘 2

(Part 1)

Miles woke up from his boyfriend's bed feeling his lower back aching a bit. "Mmm," He could smell garlic and onions in the air with a slight hint of tomatoes. The nineteen year old got up from his partner's bed going to the restroom to brush his teeth and wash up his face.

It's a few days since dinner with his boyfriend and his family had. This time Miles was able to sleepover at his boo, letting his mom know he won't be able to come home till the next day around noon. Luckily his mom allow him to spend time with his boyfriend, unlike his dad.

Miles is in Earth 138b, so his new upgraded watch had him fit into the world's reality. He had fonts over him with tired symbols being gloomy. "Weird." He always looks amazed by the way he looks in Hobie's world. The weird word would pop out of him with a bold italic font and ripped paper, somehow he is the only that sort of noticed this.

Every time he mentions it to Hobie about these things, being a bit surprised about it. Apparently in his boyfriend world not many noticed or would play along to these weird fonts or images of ripped magazines, newspaper like it was apart of them. Hobie never realized until he got the watch that he was able to have very expressive imagery all around him. Even when he turns pink or any color, he doesn't noticed until Gwen pointed it out when he came to her world.

When the nineteen year old came out of the bathroom, he saw his boyfriend stirring something on the pan. Hobie's eyes look over to find his cute Sunflower in his blue and red boxer shorts walking barefoot. "Morning, luv. Had a good sleep?" He asked having to stir their breakfast with a metal spatula.

"Mmm, morning, baby!" Miles went over to slouch on his boyfriend to give him a kiss. Hobie is in his boxer briefs being shirtless too. Their lips entwine for the moment as he went back to cooking. "Smells good."

His boyfriend holds onto his punker while taking a peak at the pan, "Beans?"

"Yes, luv. Today you'll be trying Beans on Toast. A classic British breakfast!" Hobie hums, "I got tea on the kettle. You prefer Earl's?"

"Yeah, that's fine, baby. I'm willing to try anything." Miles nodded being ready for it. The two had talked about trying more of Hobie's cultural foods, since Miles always share his Puerto Rican meals. It's only fair.

Then, a loud boat horn out loud on the docks, "Looks like, the old geezer is doing his morning salute." Hobie rolled his eyes, as the two hear Hobie's neighbor blowing his morning horn.

"He still thinks there's another World War coming." Miles set up two cups to put in tea bags waiting for the kettle to be ready. The young man met Hobie's neighbors a couple of times, a crazy old man that likes to salute his country's flag.

"There always is, darling." Hobie said having to toast some bread slices with butter.

Miles sat on the small round booth dinning table by the window to see the London's river and other houseboats. Hobie's is much larger boathouse than everyones, he calls her his beautiful Poly Styrene. His boat was abandon, and extremely used with a lot of wear and tear, but for the punker it was love at first sight. He put so much love and soul to his beautiful Poly.

Heck, he even decorated with his own punk aesthetics with a lot of spray paint, and Miles happily wrote Poly on it for class. "Here you go luv." Hobie placed their cups filled with tea on the table, "Best tea in London, eh?"

"Always, baby." Miles chuckles knowing his boyfriend always buy store bought tea bags, he sips a bit knowing its burning hot, "Mmm, delicious."

"You need sugar and cream, Sunflower?" Hobie asked having to look at his boyfriend's chest covered in his love bites and hickeys, a beautiful sight.

"Nah, I'm good for now." Miles giggles, "Breakfast almost ready?"

"Yeah, luv. Just wanted to ask you if you care for some scramble eggs on it or the yolk?"

"Give it to me the way you eat it, baby."

"Alright. It's very simple, darling."

"It's alright, mi flor de Luna." Miles hums feeling a bit cold, he rub his hands together underneath the table. He spoke Hobie turning bright pink with red heart patterns around. "Hehehe, you like that?"

"I do, Sunflower."

"I know, Moonflower." Miles smiles happily, he knows Hobie loves it when he speaks Spanish to him.

Soon Hobie placed their plates of two beans on toasts. "Sometimes my siblings like it with cheese on top."

"And you eat it with cheese?" Miles asked noticing his boyfriend took a bag of shredded cheese on the table.

Hobie shrugs, "Sometimes." He placed knives and forks just to be fancy for his boyfriend. "I'm always a fan like this or plain. The butter is to give it that flare."

"So you're impressing me, huh!" Miles flirted back, "Fancy with the butter and toast?"

"Only for you, Sunflower." He sat next to his partner to show the plate, "I overfilled on the beans since that's how I like it."

"Hmm,' Miles looks at the beans noticing onions, garlic and fresh tomatoes, "You added some?"

"Yeah, this is how I made it for my siblings. Gotta add that Jamaican seasoning, luv." Hobie kisses his boyfriend's cheek, "Hope you like it."

His boyfriend took a knife and forks trying get some toast with the beans, "I'll add the cheese once I try it like this."

"Some of my sisters like adding ketchup with the cheese." Hobie casually said which got Miles looking at him.

"What? Ketchup? Con frijoles?" There's that Rio's resemblance on his Sunflower's facial expression. "I mean... I know some Americans like adding kitchen while making chili..." Miles stood quiet as he took a bit of English Heinz bake beans with toast and butter.

Hobie's smile widen watching his boyfriend chewing very slowly trying to understand the flavor, it's really funny to see. Miles wasn't sure if his food palette was so used to Boricua flavors, or he's not into Heinz baked beans. He always ate Goya Red Kidney Beans- It's always a staple in his family's house. That's how his mom make their Habchuelas Guisado!

"Mmm," Miles could taste a bit of Jamaican seasoning which did help the plain tomato canned beans. He nodded, "Not bad. I need to try the can to know what's better."

Hobie went on the counter to show him the canned he used, "There's some sauce in here, luv? You don't like it?"

"It's not bad. I'm just not used to it, baby." Miles use his fork to pick a bit from the canned to try it, he smacks his lips taking a moment to see if he likes it or not. "Okay, I like your way more. This is a bit... plain?"

"It's that Puerto Rican that's hating on the lack of flavor, luv?"

"Yeah," Miles took a bit of cheese to sprinkle on the toast, "I feel like I have to eat it fast so it won't get soggy." Using his knife and fork to cute another piece with the cheese on it.

"Luv, that's the best part! When it gets all soggy and mushy, MMM. Lovely." Hobie said out loud, that's why he didn't start eating his breakfast yet. Taking his fork, he started to cut in the middle to see if the toast is a bit soggy to his liking, "Look at that, darling. beautiful."

"Nah, bae. That looks like it's gonna fall apart!" Miles said out loud seeing his boyfriend taking a piece for him to try, "Baby, nuuu!"

"Come on, one itty bitty bite for me?" Hobie's body turns with cute confetti, cute puppy images turning a soft yellow with pink. His eyes formed the cute begging look.

"Ugh, fine!" Miles took a bite making his body shivers with disgust. Somehow Miles' body images turns to many Yucky emojis expressions and images of modern font that said Ew! His skin turned a grossed green.

This made Hobie noticed causing him to laugh out loud, "My older sister thinks it's disgusting too, darling."

"I hate soggy bread!" Miles swallows having to chug it down with his tea, with Japanese Emoticons like '(￣￣|||)' or '(⇀‸↼‶)'. Hobie closes closer seeing more Japanese icons and slangs.

"How did you get those?" Hobie asked being surprised.

Miles look at his skin, "I'm not so sure..."

"You're too cute, darling." Hobie plant a kiss on his boyfriend's cheek with his arm around Miles' neck to pull him closer.

"Mmm, trying to get out of trouble! Giving me that nasty ass soggy bread." Miles angrily pucker his lips still being upset about it. "I'm going to finish my beans on toast!"

Hobie laughs seeing the slight red color with Kaomojis around his boyfriend's body. '⁽⁽(੭ꐦ •̀Д•́ )੭*⁾⁾, [ •̀ ^ •́ ], (˚ ˃̣̣̥⌓˂̣̣̥)' patterns all over with a slight of muted red. "Darling, it's delicious that way."

"No, it's not!" Miles argues, he dig his fork into the toast trying to eat it before it gets soggy. "Also, with cheese it's good, too."

"Wanna try it with ketchup?"

"No, I wanna play it safe." Miles admits, "Have you try this with my mom's beans?"

"I have and it's delicious that way too, darling." Hobie chews his beans on toast, his body beaming yellow with satisfying imagery around him, "Mmm, perfection."

"Heh, you really like this, huh? You grew up eating this a lot."

"It's one of the only things me and my siblings could eat."

Hearing this made Miles stop for the moment, "What? Your mom didn't cook?"

"Nah, she's a drunk. Never cared to cook anything for us. My older sister had taught herself how to cook. One of the things she knew was this, so we all learned to eat this." Hobie casually said. "Sometimes we only had a few cans and bread for breakfast, lunch and dinner."

"You never got sick of it?"

"You couldn't or else you don't eat, luv." Hobie finally looks at his partner, "And eating this is way better than starving three times in a row."

"Baby..."

"Don't give me that look, luv." Hobie sighs turning back to finished eating.

"What look?"

"That look like you feel bad for me."

"Baby," His boyfriend wrapped his arms around Hobie's arms, "you never told me your childhood was this bad."

"Because I don't want to be view some poor boy getting pity on bollocks! My mum was a fucking drunk that didn't give a shit about me and my brothers and sisters! It was bad enough we got looks for being black, but a poor black family?" He scoffs.

"Bae, I just want to know more so we can talk about it. I didn't know your mom was this neglectful! hey, look at me, Hobie. Come on, baby," The nineteen year old caress his boyfriend's hand noticing he's upset. When Hobie gets upset about his childhood, he tends to shut down or avoid the conversation all together, it's better that way. "Hobie, it's okay to get upset. Look, I'm surprised because you rarely talk about. I'm sorry if I did anything to hurt you. I promise I won't bring it up, again."

"Nah, luv. It's my fault. I know you want to know more about me, but I'm afraid..."

"Why?"

"Because you might see me a bit too damage." Hobie rested his head into his boyfriend's arms. "Like ripped old jeans."

"Getting a bit poetic there, bae."

"Sunflower!" He frowns then chuckles. "I'm too damage, darling. Got some terrible demons in me."

"So?" Miles scoffs having his arms wrapped around his boyfriend's upper chest, then giving him kisses on the forehead feeling his thick wicks rubbing against his collar bones. "I love you, baby."

"But you only know a part of me."

"Then show it. I love all of you, Hobart Brown. Your flaws are beautiful to me, mi amor." Miles kisses his boyfriend's plump lips. "Your my Poly."

"Poly?" Hobie looked confused for the moment.

"Your houseboat, baby! You told me you found her looking like shit, all broken and one part was about to crack open and sink the boat," Miles began, "You always found something special about this place and look how fucking cool this place came out! You're my Poly, bae."

"You can fix me, bae?"

"I'm saying people saw this boat as damage and shitty, but you found her to be special. Just like I found you to be special to me, bae."

"You're saying I'm shit?" Hobie jokes.

Miles pouts, "Your not listening to me, mi amor. So mean!" His body turning into angry Kaomojis and fonts. "You ass!"

"Hahaha, I'm joking, Sunflower. I get you." Hobie pucker his lips, "Kiss?"

Miles kisses him again. "Take your time talking about your past, baby. We got all the time in the world."

"Yeah, I will. Say, should we let your parents try this." Hobie have a sly grin on his face.

"Yeah, we should! I wanna see their reaction!" Miles could picture his dad's reaction. Hobie laughs along with him.

A week passed since the two sleepover, they were super busy with being Spider-man and their own personal life been so busy. So to their relief they were able to hang out.

Hobie came by to Miles' world as they walks together on the streets to a Bodega after bodega to find the beans. Of course, it wouldn't be sold in stores where they specially sold Latins or Black products. Miles wanted to make Beans on Toast for his parents to try, so he looked at his phone to find a store that sells the brand Hobie used.

"Man, I can't believe we have to go all the way to Manhattan to find a can of beans!" Miles sighs, they walk together into a store where it sells special International items, sometimes trendy snacks and meals.

Hobie casually said, "Luv, I didn't know this was a mission. I should've brought my own."

"Nah, it's fine." Miles wrap his boyfriend's arms, "Besides, I like spending time with you."

"Me too, Sunflower." The two went inside the store to finally found the Heinz Baked Beans, only thing was... they come with flavors.

Miles saw the original canned took a pack just so Hobie can eat it at his place if he craves for it. "Luv, look... they have it with curry!" Hobie's eyes lit up seeing the baked beans with curry, "Can we get it?"

"Sure, bae!" Miles took a canned beans with curry flavor, "I can't wait to see them try this. I wonder how Billie will do."

"She'll probably give you the side eye, darling." Hobie hums as he wraps his around his lover's waist as they went to pay and leave out of the place. "Shall we take a scroll or Spider-man it?"

"Spider-man it, bae. I rather get home so we can snuggle." Miles said with his cute eyes on him

"Alright, luv." The two went into an alley with their masks on having to be Spider-men. They swing, jump and do all sorts of tricks till they reach Miles' home.

At the Morales' place, Jeff had a pink hat on having to playing with Billie. The little girl wanted her dad to be a princess playing tea party, "Mas?" She holds the tea pot asking her dad.

Rio watches in amusement seeing her big masculine husband dressed in a pink dress, anything to keep his daughter happy. "No, thank you! I have a full cup." Jeff said in a high pitch voice.

"No, more!" Billie scowls having to pour more into his cup. "Gluk. Glue!" Mimicking the sound of water being pour into her dad's tea.

"No, it's already full, Miss!"

Billie ignores him as she took a plastic cake toy, "Cake?"

"Yes, ma'am."

"Hehe. Oh, how's the weather, Madame Sprinkles?" Billie asked her dad playing the role.

"Lovely!" Jeff sounded like an old British lady.

Rio chuckles, "Your into it, huh Papi?"

"Only to make Princess Billie happy!" Jeff stay in his role.

Then, Miles and Hobie walks into the front door. "Hey!" Miles said out loud, "Hobie is here."

Jeff was about to quickly take off the outfit, but saw Billie giving him a warning look. He sighs staying in his role. Hobie greeted the parents, "Hola, Mrs. Morales," Giving her a hug, his eyes look at Jeff with a big grin.

"Hola, mijo! How you been? Did you eat all the food I gave you?" Rio asked having her hand touch his arm to check.

"Yes, ma'am." He saw Miles going to the kitchen to prepare the families' lunch. Then he turn his head at Jeff, and grins widely, "What's going on here, pops? Got your fancy dress and hat looking like the Queen?"

"No! That's not daddy it's Miss Sprinkles!" Billie spoke up in her British accent, "And we're having a lovely cup of tea!"

"Yea." Jeff put his normal voice on.

"NO! Do the voice!" Billie scowls at her dad.

"Yes." Jeff quickly did the voice which got the punker laughing.

Miles turns to Hobie, "Bae, should I heat it up in the microwave?"

"If you want. I always like cooking on the pan, darling."

Rio looks over her shoulder being nosy, "Qué estás haciendo?" She asked out loud to her son.

"Making Beans on Toast!" Miles grins widely seeing his mom looking at him, "Hobie wants you guys to try it."

"Oh lord." Jeff mumbles, "Do we have to?"

"PAPÀ!" Billie shouted at him for not paying attention to her game.

"Oh, sorry, dear." Her dad did the old lady voice.

Hobie said, "A classic English meal, dad." He went over to the small round table to sit in an empty spot, "Can I play along, Billie Boo?"

The two year took a moment before giving a slight nod, she went to her box to pull out a crown and dress. "You be Mrs. Dotting!"

"Darling, orange isn't my color." Hobie took the crown to put on, then looks at Jeff's dress, "I want something similar to Miss... what was your name, dearie?" Already into character.

Rio just laugh out loud. Billie took the dress to get a magenta one, "Dis?"

"Perfect, darling. This color matches with my starlit eyes, don't you think?" Hobie asked being dramatic.

Billie giggles, "Yus!" Rio watches at Jeff being lost making her giggle.

Hobie took the plastic tea up and sips, "Oh, darling... it seems my tea is a bit cold."

"Oh!" Billie pours more tea into the cup, "Gulk. Gulk. Gulk!" She said in her weak British accent, "Is that better?"

"Mmm, perfect. Best tea in all London." Hobie pretended to sip the empty cup, "Is that a good Earl's Grey or a lovely cup of Black tea?"

Jeff tilted his head, "What?"

"Ummm...Ummm, tea!" Billie said out loud. Heck, how should she know there's different types of tea?

Rio cracking up on her husband's and daughter's reaction, hearing sounds from her son in the kitchen, her curiosity got the best of her. She sat up to look over to find Miles cooking on a pan. "Miles, are you using lata de Goya?

"No, mamí. This one is special from Inglaterra." Miles hums already heating up some beans with onion and garlic, just the way his boyfriend makes it.

"Habichuelas de inglaterra?" His mom asked being a bit worried and surprised. "Guau."

"Mamî, hay mantecaditos?" Miles asked looking in the fridge.

"Shortening or Butter?" Rio asked.

"Butter!"

"Should be in the fridge!" His mom got up to help him look in the fridge. "Aquí," She took a butter container to find it filled with Sofrito, "Oy, hmmm, let me see the back." Rio looks at the pan, "te vas a quemar los habichuelas."

"Oh!" Miles put the heat on low as he stirs it with a wooden spoon, "Found it?"

"Yeah, here." Rio took the right container filled with butter, "Butter with beans?" She looked a bit confused.

"Butter for the toast." Miles explained, "You guys wanna try with egg yolk?"

"Oy, no! No-no, let's try it the way your novio eats it." His mom shook her head, unsure what's to come.

When Miles was finished, he gathered his parents and Billie to their spots. Placing their plates in front of them only to see them arching their eyebrows and tilting their heads together. Hobie saw his own plate, "Ugh, thanks, luv." He happily ate his plate, "Mmm, is this the curry one?"

"Yeah, I added a bit more curry since the flavor was light from the can." Miles put the can in front so his boyfriend can try it.

Hobie chews the beans from the canned and nodded, "That's light alright. Mmm, still heavenly, darling."

"So this is what you eat?" Jeff got his fork to poke at it.

"Ay, Jeff. Don't start, that's rude!" Rio gently smack his hand from being rude to Hobie's English meal.

"What! You were thinking it too!"

Billie stood on a chair as she leans over to pick the toast seeing it soggy, and the beans not like her mom's way. "Ewww..." She lets it go knowing she won't like it.

"Come on, guys. it's not that bad! Look." Miles took a piece and chews it. "And I made it better than the canned." He offer Billie a piece from his fork.

"No!" Billie turned her head away.

"Come on, Boo-Boo. You'll like it." Miles cooed, he got close for Billie to try it, "Please."

"Mmm," His little sister stood hesitant for the moment, slowly she tries it. Smacking her lips, she wasn't sure if she did like it.

"Well, I'll be happy to try it." Rio took a fork to dig in, and her husband follows her.

Hobie watches the two slowly chewing it, their unsure expression got him laughing out loud. Billie still smacking her lips still confused by the beans, "Jugo!" She called for her juice.

"Okay, I'll get you some." Miles went into the the kitchen to get her sippy cup filled with juice.

"Me too, son!" Jeff finally said, he kindly push back the plate, "Nope. Sorry, Brown. This is a no for me."

"It's not bad, but not like mines." Rio took another bite trying to be respectful.

Miles came in with a sippy cup and glass of juice for her dad and sister. Billie happily took her juice to sip then open her mouth at her mom, "Ah!"

"Quieres más, mi amor?" Rio asked seeing her toddler standing on the chair.

Billie nodded, "Huh uh. Mas!"

"Not you, Boo-boo!" Jeff said to his little girl.

Billie shrugs, "Good with juice!" She took another bite from her mom's spoon.

"Jeff it's not bad."

"I don't like it. It's too plain for me." Jeff sips his glass of juice.

Miles arched his eyebrows, "Dad, I added a good amount of salt. Besides, you can add cheese on top of it or scramble eggs."

"Or if you're feeling a bit daring some hot sauce or ketchup." Hobie chews having the biggest grin on his face, he finds it hilarious that Miles' Jeff didn't like his favorite meal.

"Ketchup?" Jeff asked out loud with his eyes wide from a mix of disgust and shock.

Rio pressed her lips together, "Like this?"

"Nonono!" Billie shook her head, "No, kes-up!"

"Cheese taste good." Miles said.

"Lord, my stomach already bubblin'." His dad shook his head, "I'm too old for trying this stuff."

"Cheese, I understand, but ketchup?" Rio asked Hobie.

"It gives a bit of sweetness." Hobie finished his plate up all clean, "Luv, that was amazing. Is there more?"

"You're lucky I bought the second can." Miles giggles, "I'll make more for you, bae."

"He can have my plate. I'm order pizza." Jeff huffed.

"Ohh, pizza!" Billie chews.

"You want pizza, bebé?" Rio said to her daughter.

The little girl nodded, "Cheese pizza!"

"Some good New York pizza will satisfy me." The middle age man got up to make an order over the phone.

Miles came with a second plate for Hobie using the curry beans canned. "Here you go, baby."

"Thanks luv, this beats pizza any day." Hobie happily eats his meal being extremely happy.

"Don't British people like Fish with fries?" Jeff asked out loud.

"Ahhh, now that's better than pizza." Hobie said out loud, "Battered fish with chips with a good ale on a Friday night! Ah, the best!"

"Hahaha, there's some places around here that makes Fish n' Chips, bae. Maybe you'll like them." Miles chuckles.

"Me and my big mouth." Jeff grunts, "I'm fine with pizza on a Friday night."

Rio said, "You always like a filet fish from McDonalds with a hot cup of coffee."

"That's different, baby! That's for lunch during work! Pizza is great for Friday night!" He responded back.

Hobie said, "Nah, pops! Fish n' Chips."

"Chips?" Billie asked.

"He means french fries," Miles kisses his little sister's cheek. "I learned that the hard way."

"Well, fried fish is always good." Rio said thinking about her recipes.

"Chips covered in gravy and a bit of vinegar with a dash of salt is great too." Hobie said out loud.

Miles giggles, "Bae, I think your just hungry."

"I guess, so. You know, I could go for Mrs. Morales' habichuelas guisado with rice after this!" Hobie finished his second plate.

Rio's eyes gleamed with a big smile on her face, "I have a big pot in the stove, mijo! Don't worry I'll get the rice cooking!" Being so happy Hobie likes her habichuelas guisado.

Billie bounced happily, "Oh! Me too!" She loves her rice and beans.

Miles sat on Hobie's lap having to chuckle in his bae's ear, his dad being busy ordering pizza. "Hahaha, bae. You made my mom so happy!"

"Darling, I love her cooking."

"I know, and mines?"

"Your's came out great. Maybe I have to ask you to make me some." Hobie kisses his cheek.

"Well, your the Beans on Toast to my Habichuelas, bae." Miles teased.

"Using my line, huh! I like it." Hobie playfully kissing his boyfriend's cheeks.

"Hey, six feet away, Miles!" Jeff caught the two being lovey dovey before going back on the phone.

"No! Nonono! Me!" Billie got on the table to walk over to her older brother. "My bro-der!" Her brother quickly pick her up seeing her being protective.

"No, he's mine." Hobie teased the little one.

"No, mine!"

Miles merely sighs seeing how his family is all over the place, then he smiles at his man. Hobie looks a lot happier than the first time they met, he's glad he can give his boyfriend the family he needs.

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