Tumgik
#Taylor Entertainment Group
tulsajazz · 2 years
Text
"Celebrating the Women of Jazz" An International Jazz Day Event! April 30, 2022 7 pm at The NSU Center for the Performing Arts!
“Celebrating the Women of Jazz” An International Jazz Day Event! April 30, 2022 7 pm at The NSU Center for the Performing Arts!
TulsaJazz.com and The Taylor Entertainment Group are thrilled to announce “Celebrating the Women of Jazz” performed by the NSU Jazz Ensemble under the direction of Dr. Clark Gibson, featuring Jazz Vocalist and National Recording Artist Cynthia Simmons. This is a free event! The program will feature music from some of the greats like Sarah Vaughan, Ella Fitzgerald, Nina Simone, and more. The…
Tumblr media
View On WordPress
3 notes · View notes
taylorvaughnsaidso · 5 months
Text
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
4 notes · View notes
kstarvibes · 3 months
Text
K-Pop Dominates US Music Charts in 2023: In-depth Analysis of Top-Selling Albums and their Impact on the Industry
In 2023, the music industry in the United States witnessed a significant rise in the popularity of K-pop albums. According to data released by Luminate, a music data tracking firm, seven out of the top ten best-selling albums in the U.S. were from the K-pop genre. This achievement highlights the growing influence and global appeal of K-pop music. In this article, we will delve into the details of…
Tumblr media
View On WordPress
2 notes · View notes
tv-moments · 1 year
Photo
Tumblr media
Mayor of Kingstown
Season 1, “This Piece of My Soul“
Director: Stephen Kay
DoP: Stuart Campbell
8 notes · View notes
geekcavepodcast · 1 year
Video
youtube
Two Sinners and a Mule Trailer
Kicked out of a small town for being all “sinful,” Alice and Nora set out to pursue their dream of opening a restaurant in Virginia City. On the way they come across a wounded bounty hunter named Elden on the prairie. For a cut of the bounty, Alice and Nora nurse Elden back to health and help him stalk his prey, Grimes. But it seems Grimes is on the trios’ tail instead, making the hunters the hunted, and everything gets even more complicated when both Alice and Nora develop feelings for Edlen.
Two Sinners and a Mule stars Cam Gigandet, Chantelle Albers, Hannah James, and Buck Taylor. Raliegh Wilson directs.
Two Sinners and a Mule releases to select theaters, digital, and on demand on April 21, 2023, and on DVD on May 30, 2023.
0 notes
jaylver · 11 months
Text
HOW YOU GET THE GIRL — P.JS
Tumblr media
SYNOPSIS: Beach parties are supposedly fun and exciting, aren’t they? Wrong. Experiencing college parties is rare for you, but you decided to give this one a go after your best friend’s constant pleas. Things were alright until everything turned sour when trouble found you and eventually you were roped into a fight alongside the campus’ famous hockey playboy. As if that wasn’t enough, the devil himself conjured up an idea that you found yourself being entangled in. It was all fun and games up until confusion arose, feelings being confessed and played, in the end, Jay had to learn how to get the girl, his girl.
Tumblr media
PAIRINGS: ice hockey player!jay x afab!reader
GENRE: strangers to frenemies to lovers, fake dating au, college sports au, romance, fluff, angst, secret pining
WARNING(S): drinking, parties, profanities, slight violence, possessive jay, mentions/hints of cheating, miscommunication, slow burn-ish, a pinch of suggestiveness
WC: 21k
AUTHOR NOTES: yes, the title is based on taylor swift's song, the story is lowkey inspired from it hehe! i also included a scene which was inspired from "sleet kitten" so credits to that ;) PLEASE LEAVE A FEEDBACK! it would mean THE WORLD to me <3 hope you enjoy!
part 2 of 'no competition' series | series masterlist | masterlist
© jaylver 2023
Tumblr media
“WHY AM I HERE?”
You found yourself asking your best friend, Minji, only after barely ten minutes of setting foot into the party. Look, you didn’t wish to complain, but a beach party basically equaled sand in shoes, which you absolutely hate and despise, yet you were stuck here against your will.
It all started on a random stroll across campus where Minji brought up the night beach party hosted by some rich frat boy, typical. Being the anti-party person you were, you brushed the idea away initially. Hey, staying in bed with a cup of tea was miles better than having sand in your shoes and frat boys trying to get into your pants, yuck. But eventually, you gave into the idea of relaxing and letting go for once after a horrid chemistry test. How you absolutely regretted that choice now.
“You’re here to enjoy yourself,” Minji hissed through her teeth, holding onto your hand as the two of you walked past strangers. “What’s wrong with getting free booze and some hot hunky beach boys?”
“Everything is wrong with that. Their booze sucks and the beach boys hide at night,” you huffed, hugging your body tight as the wind blew across your face, the smell of sea lingered in the air.
“There are still some cute guys here,” Minji kicked at the sand lightly, staring around where people were littered in groups here and there, a small bonfire alighted in the middle of the beach. “The hockey guys are here,” she nodded at the loudest bunch in the area.
You knew a part of them since you did occasionally stop by to watch a few major hockey games, but definitely not well enough to pair their names to their faces. You spotted the captain first and the one with freshly dyed white hair, who you recognized was also his usual partner on ice, then there was the player with a really odd number, 99. Was it Jason, James or Jeremy? All you could remember was him being number 99 and having a J name, not to mention, an interesting reputation to his name.
"They're cute, don't you think so?" Minji nudged you and you shrugged.
"Cute but fuckboys, and I need them to step up during major games too,"
"You should ignore the hockey part about them. It'll hurt less when they lose," Minji's head turned and she pointed to another group. "The footballers are there too. Trust me, they're bigger fuckboys,"
"Oh, I can tell," you spotted many of them already having a girl by their sides, whispering and giggling while they poured each other more drinks. "This is why I'd rather go back to the dorms,"
"Maybe, maybe not. Something entertaining will eventually happen at these types of parties,"
"I feel like you'll jinx it,"
Minji threw her hands up in defence, raising her eyebrows and shrugging. "Don't blame me, blame the system,"
"There's no system," you shot back, suddenly feeling the need to walk away for a moment as the beach slowly overwhelmed you. (you hated the beach, can't you already tell?) "I need to stop by the restroom for a while, look after my drink, will you?"
You were practically racing to the nearby restroom, finally escaping the area and being able to breathe freely without drunk college students bumping into you. The restroom was basically just a single cubicle, so you were squeezed tightly and you felt uncomfortable as each second passed. You were praying to God that you get to leave this place pronto. 
Leaving the cubicle made you feel slightly more grateful about the beach, but upon only a second from exiting, you started hearing shouts coming not far from where you were. At first, you wondered if you’ve reached the point of hallucination, but following a few more grunts and yells, you knew you weren’t. Your body tensed immediately considering it's a distance from the main area. What could even be happening here?
You knew this was how horror movies usually start, but your curious mind just had to wander off further into the abyss and bring your leg along, so you chose the stupidest decision and followed the distant commotion.
'I'm not dying tonight. I'm not dying at a beach. I'm going to be fine' were the affirmations you repeated in your head, though you felt quite the opposite of that.
"Fuck you, are you banging my girl?"
That was when you stopped in your tracks completely, thrown absolutely off guard, eyes widened and lips forming into an 'O'. It wasn't a murder case, but from the way the conversation sounded, it was about to be one.
"I didn't bang your girl, who the fuck are you?" Another voice spat back and you inched closer, hiding behind the other cubicle and you peeked your head out, shocked at the sight before you. 
There was already a small crowd surrounding the commotion, who wouldn't want to miss a free show anyway? But the bigger matter on hand was the centre of attention, the two guys were the campus' well known hockey player and footballer. 
You recognized the footballer at once, remembering the time where Minji practically shoved his Instagram profile into your face. Yoon Keeho. Star player paired along with his amazing features, he was a popular figure who had a popular girlfriend from the dance team, Karina. They were basically every comics' perfect couple.
Then there was the hockey player, your jaw could only hang lower in plain shock. Mr 99, hockey star and infamous playboy, you knew he was trouble, but this kind of trouble? A little unexpected from him.
"Look man, I know people say I fuck around a lot, but I never fucked her!" It was obvious Mr 99 was starting to get heated, but the footballer was relentless in egging him on.
"Oh fuck off man, I know you did it!"
This back and forth had you rolling your eyes, eventually getting bored from the “no I didn't”s and “yes you did”s thrown back and forth, so you slowly crept back, trying your best to avoid tripping over rocks and shells.
'Crack' 
You spoke too soon. Way too soon.
"Hey!"
You took a few cautious steps ahead. Maybe if you just pretend nothing happened and continue walking, it would be fine. Maybe if you walked away, he wouldn't notice—
"Hey!"
You squeezed your eyes shut, contemplating between immediate death or a quick dash away, but neither could be decided when the voice kept on calling after you, ruining your patience completely and you whipped around, looking like a deer caught in headlights. 
"Yes?"
Mr 99 stared back at you, a sinister look in his eyes. From the looks of it, he had something evil brewing in that head of his and soon, you were about to be the victim of his dodgy plan.
What came out of his lips next definitely made you wish you were home instead and simultaneously, wishing you had the freedom to strangle him. This fucker—
"That's my girlfriend there, she can vouch for me," you heard him telling Keeho, a smug smile on his face. Girl … friend? Gasps were heard and all eyes were on you in an instance. "Come here, babe, I've been looking for you!"
You blinked, your body absolutely rigid and unmoving as if paralysed. This couldn't be happening, right? Please wake me up from this dream. I'm just hallucinating—
"Babe, come on," your brief dissociation had you completely unaware that Mr 99 was now in front of you, dragging you by your wrist towards the scene of commotion. 
"What are you doing?" You whispered harshly into his ear, making sure it wasn't loud enough for the other couple to realise from a distance away.
"Play along, please, I'll pay you," he pleaded, desperation clear in his voice. Who were you to say no to free cash? Nevertheless, you still hated being the centre of attention, and Mr 99 here was only making matters worse.
"I don't even know you,"
"I'm Jay from literature, so technically now you do. Just help me for a few minutes," he grunted through his gritted teeth, flashing his best version of puppy eyes that failed to execute its purpose. 
“Do you even know my name?” you hissed lowly, glaring pointedly at him. He could only sigh in exasperation. He had the audacity to seem annoyed while you were literally the one who’s getting dragged to her demise. 
“You’re Y/N from English literature. We have the same classes and I’m not a douche for not knowing my classmates, okay?” you were slightly pleased, but not enough to be someone’s fake girlfriend for show. Against your free will, you and Jay were finally standing face to face with the couple. 
"So you're his girlfriend?" Keeho had an eyebrow raised, a sense of accusation and suspicion in his gaze. He was so not buying this.
You glanced at Jay, face twisted in uneasiness, not loving the idea of this, but instead, he shot you an encouraging look which was screaming 'go on, tell him'. "Y–yeah. Girlfriend,"
Keeho was unconvinced and you couldn't blame him, you were doing a shit job at pretending to be someone you weren't. "Where was your boyfriend yesterday at night? Was he out?"
"He—" the words got stuck in your throat and Jay raised his eyebrows at you, mouthing some random words you totally couldn't decipher. "He went out on a date with me,"
"To?"
"Baskin Robbins …?"
Keeho remained unamused, his girlfriend holding onto him snickering silently under her breath, and you, on the other hand, got naturally defensive.
"What's wrong with ice cream? At least my man cared enough to bring me out for ice cream dates instead of letting me cheat on him freely. Just saying,"
"What?"
Now it was Keeho and Jay's turn to stare at you with their jaws hung low. Karina's face gradually grew scarlet, her lips twisted into a snarl. "What do you even know about my relationship? Keep out of my business, you bitch,"
"Hey, who the fuck are you to call her a bitch?" Jay stepped in front of you, an arm shielding you and Karina cowered away. Damn, he was good at this.
"Don't talk to her like that, you fuck," Keeho spat at Jay, daringly pushing Jay on the chest and he stumbled slightly into your arms. 
Jay scoffed, brushing his front and adjusted his shirt, shaking his head a little. "You're such a dick, Yoon Keeho. You're the prime example why I hate footballers,"
"And you hockey players are the reason why you're dragging the school's name to the ground,"
"Save the talk, we literally won the playoffs while you and your team could barely crawl to the top—"
You gasped, and so did everyone else watching. Keeho had thrown a hard punch across Jay's pretty face, which meant Jay's aggravation unfortunately worked a little too well on the footballer. 
To your surprise, Jay took the hit better than you'd expected. He did seem taken aback at the start, but then he started laughing instead. Was he secretly psychotic?
You would be lying if you said you weren't shell shocked initially, but after a moment of recovery, you peeked over his shoulder, staring at his face for any obvious bleeding or bruising, unaware of how close your face was to his.
"You okay, big man?"
"Took it like a champ," he muttered back, a smirk pulled at his lips, seeming as though nothing had even happened. "Permission for me to punch him back, girlfriend?"
"He's all yours. Go beat his ass, boyfriend,"
Jay shrugged nonchalantly, rubbing the side of his face roughly and in a flash, he threw a punch back at Keeho and panicked whispers broke out in the crowd.
"Look man, this is a misunderstanding, I totally didn't fuck your girlfriend," Jay panted, his eyes narrowing at Karina. 
"Don't look at me like that," she snapped back, but her voice wavered, giving away the fact that she was obviously hiding something and was intimidated by the way Jay could see right through her.
"Oh come on, fess up, I'm pretty sure I saw you with Yeonjun," 
Karina stilled, her eyes beginning to twitch. Bingo. You didn’t sit through a boring psychology talk once for nothing.
"You don't know shit about me,"
"Okay, say that to Yeonjun the next time he finds you," 
Maybe you did regret having too big of a mouth. You just had to blabber on and agitate the mean girl and now you were reenacting a scene from one of your favourite high school rom coms. 
Before you could even register what's happening, you felt a sharp tug at your hair and pain washed over your whole head. Getting bald wasn't the thing you wished for upon reaching here. You screamed on instinct, reaching over to grab Karina's hair in defence, invoking a loud cry from her.
Jay and Keeho were left stunned at the turn of events. Hell, you were stunned at the attack yourself. Who would've thought you would be sacrificing strands of hair to Miss Dancer? They eventually came to their senses (thank heavens) and tried to pull you and Karina off of each other. It was strenuous work just trying to break you two apart, your hand was unwilling to let go and neither were hers.
She might’ve been a dancer, but you’ve experienced more fights than this. Jay managed to rip you off of Karina and you were left dishevelled, heaving heavily, Jay's hands wrapped around your chest from the back.
"Calm down. Breathe. You're so close to ripping all her hair out," he whispered into your ear, his breath fanning your ears. If you weren't so out of breath and adrenaline spiked, you would be weak in the knees by now. 
"Good. She was the one who laid her hands on me first," you spat, glaring straight at her and she did the same, hair and attire equally as messy as yours. 
"Look man," Jay called out to Keeho, grabbing his attention away from his murderous girlfriend. "I might fuck around a lot, but I swear I didn't touch your girl. I never stoop that low and you know it. Go ask her for the truth yourself, I'm leaving now,"
Jay got ahold of your hand and pulled you away from the wandering eyes and lingering attention. You almost got a whiplash, unable to even yourself completely together and digest what even went on before he dragged you towards the main area. 
"Woah, woah, wait," you yanked your arm away, stopping abruptly which made Jay turn around, a questioning look on his face. Why is he looking at me like that? You thought as you crossed your arms.
"Look, you might've saved my ass from Miss Crazy over there, but the part where you dragged me in your stupid drama, so not cool," 
"I know, I'm sorry, okay? You were just coincidentally … there,"
"Wow," you exclaimed in disbelief, face scrunched in slight distaste. "Girlfriend, huh … I hate to burst your bubble but there were people there and if—" you poked at his chest and he stared at you, a slight smirk on his lips, "—people actually believe we're dating, I'll beat you up,"
"What's so wrong about me?" He whistled, leaning down to meet your challenging gaze, a sarcastic grin wide on that devilish face of his. Maybe if he wasn't this annoying, you would've found him pants-dropping hot.
"I hate you," you continued your journey back, brushing past him and he could only let out a laugh at your words.
"Oh, come on," he caught your wrist and pulled you to him, making you land on his chest with a soft thud. If only someone could take a picture of this, it would be something straight out of a 2000s classic romcom.
"You're ridiculous, let go," you tried to get your hand out of his, but he persisted in holding onto you. 
Pushing and pulling was something you hated. Whether it was in relationships or just whatever this was, you wished it was gone, because in the next second of tug of war, one of you decided to lose balance and fall to ground.
To your biggest nightmare and headache, you ended up lying on top of Mr 99, Jay, the devil in disguise. The beach was already a nightmare for you, but a fucking man under you? You wished you could disappear now.
"Do you always like this position?" 
"If only I could choke you to death in it, then sure,"
"Kinky. You're really romantic,"
"I know," you gritted out, finally mustering all your energy to push yourself up and away from Jay, almost losing your balance in the process. You definitely wouldn't want to fall on him again.
You dusted sand off of your shorts, peeking slightly at Jay, who remained on the ground, his hands behind his head to support him as his stare remained on you, a small smile on his face. You truly wondered what was running through that head of his. Knowing him, it was probably nothing good.
“Do you think we’ll meet again after this?”
You scoffed, a frown etched on your features. “You’re acting like I’m cinderella. I’m on the campus,”
“I mean, we both might be on campus, but that doesn’t mean we’ll cross path,”
“It sounds like you’re trying to propose something—” Jay opened his mouth to respond, but you continued off, not letting him interrupt, “—whatever it is, it’s a ‘no’ from me, okay?”
“Alright, rude,” Jay pushed his body up from the sands, sitting cross legged paired with an offended look. “I’m not trying to propose anything. What’s that dirty mind of yours thinking? I was simply wondering,”
You squinted at him, doubt in your gaze and your face scrunched, humming softly. “Let’s leave our next meeting to fate again. I’m afraid if I keep seeing you I might—”
“Fall in love?”
“Explode. Close enough,” you grimaced, shaking the sand off your shoes. "Look, I'm leaving now. Good luck on not getting beat up again," you turned to leave, but halting once Jay spoke again.
"Will I be seeing you at my matches?"
You pondered for a second, then shrugged. "Depends. I'm not a big hockey fan, but who knows?"
You heard a small chuckle from Jay, rolling your eyes a little. "Fine by me. Let's see how fate sets us up then, Y/N."
You wished fate didn't set you and him up. You wished fate would never ever do so. You didn’t wait for another minute and quickly dashed away, finding your way back to the main area that (thankfully) wasn’t far from where you were. It seemed that the fight didn’t reach the main area where everyone was from the way they were all dancing and drinking like normal.
“Where were you?” Minji pulled you close to her once you had managed to locate her amongst the bunch, concern laced in her voice. “And what the fuck happened to you? Why’s your hair messed up? Wait—” the worry in her gaze soon turned into suspicion. “You didn’t have a secret hookup right?”
“What? No!” you shrieked, glancing around in slight embarrassment at your voice rising unintentionally. Just thinking about what had happened just now gave you a first degree burn of embarrassment, it was going to be your first and last experience, never again. “I … got into a fight,”
“You what?”
“Listen,” you placed a hand on Minji’s shoulder, trying to calm her down while inching closer and making sure to keep your voice down. “I stumbled upon a messy couple related drama and somehow I got roped into it. It’s all Jong Seong’s fault, okay?”
“Jay? What did he do?”
“Accused of fucking Keeho’s girl. It would be funny to witness the whole thing without being apart of it, honestly,”
“I need more context,”
“He called me his girlfriend so that I could vouch for him and I said something bad to Keeho’s girlfriend so we … kinda got into a tussle,”
Minji was stunned to say the least, but there was still a hint of amusement from the way she smiled.  “I won’t directly say she deserves it, but she does,” she let out a small laugh and you two shared a look before bursting out laughing, having to hold your chest from the random jokes she threw in between.
“So, time for us to leave?”
“Fucking finally, I was waiting for you to say this,”
“No girls trips to the beach in the future, huh?”
“Nope.” you mumbled, letting Minji wrap an arm around your waist as the both of you start making your way to Minji’s car. You strangely felt a pair of wandering eyes pinpointed on you and you turned your head slightly to the right, meeting Jay’s playful gaze among his group of hockey guys. It was barely a second before you were dragged away anyway, leaving you minimal chances to process anything.
Park Jong Seong, please don’t ever drag me into your schemes ever again. Fuck it, let’s never cross paths again.
Tumblr media
IT SEEMS THAT FATE HAS PLAYED ITS ROLE ONCE MORE IN TORTURING YOU.
In what way was ‘never getting involved with Park Jong Seong’ so hard to understand, huh, fate? You found yourself having an angry internal monologue on the way back to your dorms, your coffee threatening to spill out of the cup with the aggressiveness in your walk. It all started out like this: you just got your donut for the morning, walking to lecture with your earphones blasting your favourite music, what could possibly go wrong? Everything.
You were just walking as per usual, until a girl tapped you from the back, and like every normal person does, you stopped and turned around, a confused look on your face. Who’s this? You wondered. That’s the last thought you could form before everything started crumbling eventually.
First, she asked whether you were dating Jay. Eye roll. You knew this was bound to happen. So, you said ‘no’, which was a reasonable answer since you were, in fact, not dating him. But the girl thought otherwise. You turned to leave, halfway to shoving back your earphones in when she grabbed hold of your wrist. Woah. 
“I know you’re dating him, everyone do after he made y’all official during that party,”
“Okay…?” it was no use trying to fight back with her persistence, so you just went along with it, not knowing what you were even getting into.
“You do know he fucked me before right—?” TMI much. “Can you tell him to come over and get his stuff? It feels wrong having a man’s stuff around knowing he’s in a relationship,”
“Oh,” was all you could muster out. This whirlwind of information being smacked into your face at 10 in the morning was something you hadn’t expected. “You can tell him that yourself. I’m … busy. I have to go,”
Like any sane person would, you dashed away, possibly leaving the girl in a confused daze but you couldn’t care less, pulling out your phone to angrily type Jay’s Instagram handle and sending him an annoyed text message.
you: a girl just told me she fucked you and she felt it was wrong that you left your stuff while you’re ‘dating’ me. can you please sort this out? istg i’ve been asked too many times whether i’m dating you today fr
Not even after a minute of sending that, Jay replied back at once. 
jaypjs: how did you know what my Insta profile is?
You rolled your eyes, your fingers working hard but careful to not accidentally break your screen with the vigour you had whilst typing.
you: is that so important right now? can you at least answer my question?
jaypjs: just ignore it, it’ll pass soon, i swear. ttyl i have practice ;) 
Jerk. 
As much as Jay had asked you to ignore it, it seemed to have backfired instead. At the library, cafeteria, girl’s restroom, you were bombarded with the same question over and over again. ‘Are you dating Jay?’ You swore if you had a dollar everytime someone had asked you this question, you would’ve been a billionaire by now.
Evening soon fell upon the campus grounds, students were rushing around to find a place for dinner, but the hockey team were still remained in training, and being you, you just had to impulsively barge into the arena, practically rushing down the stairs to the glass panes, spotting your target at first glance. 
You would be lying if you said you didn’t find him mesmerizingly attractive in that split moment. He reminded you of someone that had just appeared straight out of a scene from ‘Top Gun’, except on ice. He had his helmet in his hand, his hair wet with sweat, his eyes trained on his coach as he lectured the team on that and this.
You thought your staring had gone unnoticed, but that’s when one of his teammates pointed at you, his gaze turning to you now, a hint of curiosity and surprise in his face. If only he knew you were actually there to murder him.
“Y/N?” You heard his muffled voice through the glass as he skated towards you right after his coach had dismissed them, inching closer and closer until there was barely any distance, only a singular glass pane separating you two apart.
“Jay,” you started, pushing down whatever volcano that was close to bursting inside you right now. 
“Did my girlfriend miss me so much until she decided to give me a surprise visit?”
“If I hear that word one more time today, I think I might jump down the nearest building,” you snapped, poking a finger on the glass threateningly. “Look, I’m here because we need to talk—why does this sound like an actual couple conversation—whatever, just get your ass out here immediately,”
“Fine, fine,” Jay threw his hands up in defeat, sensing the seriousness in your voice, you did not come to play. “I’ll be out in a second,”
He disappeared out of sight, and to your dismay, that left his teammates a great opportunity to approach you. Just your luck, huh?
“You’re dating Jay?” the captain, Heeseung, shouted over at you, waving his hockey stick in the air in an attempt to grab your attention.
“It’s complicated,”
“Friends with benefits?” the one with a head of freshly dyed white hair, Sunghoon, chimed in. You recognized the both of them from the party, what are the odds?
“Non-physical type of complicated,”
“That does sound complicated,” Heeseung hummed, practising passes with Sunghoon. “Played with your feelings?”
“I don’t know if I can count it as that…yet,”
Heeseung and Sunghoon shared a brief glance at one another. “Jay might be a playboy, we all know that, but he’s a softie at heart. Hear him out, he might not look like it, but he’s the best at talking,”
“That’s why he’s so good at picking up girls—” Heeseung slapped Sunghoon’s head, giving you a small reassuring smile while the other winced in pain, not appreciating that one bit.
“I’ll hear him out, don’t worry,” you said rather begrudgingly, sitting down on one of the empty seats now, rubbing your hands for warmth as you awkwardly waited for Jay.
“Stop pestering her already, damn,” Jay’s footsteps were heard thumping down the stairs in the empty arena. “Go wash up,” he slid into the seat next to you, now in clean clothes, a towel hung around his neck, his hair wet and messy, his shirt hugging his body and biceps tight. Lord, give me strength.
“Hey! I’m the captain!” Heeseung shouted, but abided, pushing Sunghoon along and out of the rink, leaving you two to yourselves in the ambiance.
“So, what did you want to … talk about?” Jay stared at you expectantly.
“Us? I suppose, if there’s even an ‘us’ in the first place,” you gestured between you and him. “It’s just everyone’s thinking we’re together and all your past fuck buddies are up my ass for it. So—” you tried to put on the nicest smile you could muster. “—could you please, somehow spread it around that we’re not together?”
“But what if I don’t want to?”
“Jong Seong!”
“Government name and all, it’s serious,” he murmured under his breath, suddenly seeming anxious. “You’re going to kill me for this—”
“As if I’m not going to already,”
“Let me finish,” he pressed a hand on his forehead, running it further back into his hair and he let out a distress sigh. “I know you’re going to hate this but I need your favour in this. I have this hockey event next Saturday, a charity event, and I need a plus one,”
“You’re asking me out on a date basically?”
“Kinda? But not really—this is so stupid—but this event will be after a home match, so our opponents and many others from different schools will be a part of this event. The thing is…our opponent, one of their players, is dating my ex,”
“And?” you raised an eyebrow at him, urging him to continue on, his cheeks gradually turning red in embarrassment.
“They’ll be there together, and I was hoping—since we’re already in this mess—to bring you as my plus one, to try and prove to her I’m way better off without her,”
“You’re kidding,” you breathed out in disbelief. “Give me one reason why you need to prove to this girl about you being happy and taken,”
“She cheated on me multiple times while we were dating…the guy was one of them and they’re still together surprisingly,”
“Damn, I’m sorry about that,” you swallowed, a little taken aback from the fact that the infamous fuckboy had his heart broken in the past. Maybe that was the starting point of his fuckboy journey. Gosh, everything felt so cliche, you thought you were in a web series by now. “So…you want me to fake date you?”
“Why are you saying it as if the idea of dating me is an offence?”
“Jay, this isn’t some 2000s romcom, for fuck’s sake,” you snapped, your frown deepened and your blood pressure heightened. You swear you might actually explode soon.
“I’m aware,” Jay sighed, a small whine in his voice. He did seem desperate, and you wondered why out of a hundred girls that were practically lining up for this man, you just had to be the one that had to be a part of this mess with him. Talk about being in the wrong place at the wrong time. Worst of all, you were about to agree to something as dumb as this. “Help me out this once?”
“And what will I get from this?” you crossed your arms, hesitatingly giving in slowly and gradually.
“You like Juyeon don’t you?” Jay questioned all of a sudden, his features remained stoic and serious as he watched you experiencing another whiplash, cheeks turning into a shade of light pink at his bombarding question.
“W–where did you get that information from?” you demanded, completely thrown off. Look, you did say you liked him a little from his sweet smile to his nice style, and not to mention, his athletic side, but it was to Minji, not Jay. How in hell could he have this information?
“I’m not wrong am I?”
“Am I being blackmailed?” you gasped and Jay rolled his eyes, leaning further back into his seat. He wasn’t making this easier by looking good. “I don’t like like him in that type of way, I just think he’s kinda cute,”
“So, you’re interested,”
“You could put it that way, I guess?”
“How about I help you make him jealous,” 
You choked out a laugh, Jay surely succeeded in always surprisingly you with the way his mind turned. “Dude, I literally only know him from that one Chemistry class, and we were partners once. We barely talk now except some greetings,”
“That’s better than nothing,” he mumbled, his lips pressed in a flat line. “Hey, I know him more, okay? He goes to parties and so do I, I can help you get closer to him,” Jay raised his eyebrows, as if trying to convince you that was the smartest plan ever.
“You’re an idiot,”
“I don’t hear a ‘no’,” 
“Don’t push your luck,” you poked his forehead gently, letting out a deep sigh as you contemplated for a second. Future you was going to kill the present you. “Fine. But honestly, I don’t care about Juyeon,”
“I’ll try my best to repay you either way,” Jay beamed, his whole demeanour changing entirely compared to the nervous and shaking version from earlier. “So, what ground rules should we set to make it at least quite convincing?”
“No kissing, unless we are pressured into one,”
“You’re not completely objecting the idea of kissing me,”
“Believe me, I’d rather have virgin lips than kiss you,”
“Ouch,” Jay held onto his chest, feigning hurt. “Wanna try practising?”
“You have other girls to practise on anyway, no thank you,”
“But you’re my only girl now,” he shrugged, staring down at his fingers and avoiding your stare. Was he shy? You would be lying if you said he didn’t make your heart flutter slightly with his words, but you forced yourself to push those thoughts down, denying them instantly.
"Shush," you rolled your eyes, the man opposite you snickering instead. "Maybe a soft launch might work,"
"I literally called you my girlfriend in the middle of a fight, I don't think that's any part of a soft launch,"
"You're right, we've already skipped that part," you tapped at your chin, pondering thoughtfully before Jay interjected.
"You have to come to my matches,"
"Every one of them? I don't watch hockey much,"
"Just be there for show, most of the teammates' girlfriends are there and trust me, they don't care much either," he glanced over at the rink for a brief moment, then turned back to meet your eyes. "You'll fall in love with me the moment you watch me play,"
"Alright, hotshot. When's the next match?"
“This Friday,” he winked, resting an arm on the seat and casually leaning a little closer. “But before that, wanna come to a party? It’s pretty much a ‘pregame party’, that’s what they call it, but I’m sure it’s a lame excuse to just have a party in general for every week. I can pick you up though, we'll get to have our second hard launch,”
“You’re lucky I’m not feeling murderous anymore,” you snapped back, still in disbelief at yourself that you actually agreed to all this. “Pick me up at 7,” you mumbled begrudgingly, watching a smile stretched on Jay’s face.
“Say less.”
Tumblr media
“YOU’RE DATING WHO—”
Spilling the tea to Minji on a random Wednesday morning was a chaotic decision. You couldn't help yourself from letting loose all of the information that was bottled up internally. She took everything in rather calmly and fairly, that was until Jay's name was mentioned.
It was just a day before the party, and you couldn't lie, you're starting to panic. What if you didn't know anyone there? What if you're under dressed? What if you're overdressed? What ifs stormed your mind, you were a natural overthinker after all.
"Fake dating," you corrected, cringing once the words left your mouth and you realised how ridiculous it sounded.
“I didn’t know you liked Wattpad cliches so much,”
"Shut up," you muttered half-heartedly, pursing your lips slightly. "Do you think I'll regret this?"
"Will you end up falling for him?" Minji shot back and you hadn't expected that. 
"God forbid," you chuckled, though rather nervously. Chances were low at the moment, but it wasn't completely impossible, and that was the problem. 
“This won’t be like those movies where they pretend to date and actually end up falling in love,” you laughed, trying to play off the hidden horror you had.
"This will come back and bite your ass," Minji said simply, not noticing your wide eyes and panicked gaze.
"Don't jinx it, hello!" 
"My bad," Minji shrugged nonchalantly. “How did he even convince a non party goer like you to attend one?”
“He wants to ‘hard launch’ us for a second time,”
“Cute?” Minji mused, nudging you softly, wiggling her eyebrows. "Any outfits planned?" 
"Nope," you regretted saying this because in the next second, you noticed a menacing grin on Minji's face. If there's one thing you know about her, it's that she loves dress ups, and you were about to be her next model.
Minji dragged you back to your dorm, pushing you onto the bed and ripping your closet doors open, rummaging through intensely.
"This won't do," you heard her mumble quietly before pulling out a mini skirt and a simple crop top. "Bingo,"
"You can't be serious," 
Turns out, she was. Both of the pieces have yet to be worn in a long time, so you didn’t know how it would fit you, leading up to the moment when you tried it on, you instantly felt your head pound. The skirt was God forbiddingly short, the crop top hugging tight against your body. The entirety might've looked plain, but it was a slutty plain.
You were already running late, panic and stress in your system giving you slight adrenaline as you finished up some last touches on your makeup. If Minji wasn't out for a dinner date, you would've been strangling her for the outfit and for the untimely lack of support. 
“You took quite a while in there,” Jay said the moment you entered his luxurious sleek black Mercedes. You knew he was loaded, everyone did actually, but it still managed to shock you somehow.
“I was giving myself a pep talk to not try and run away from this party,” you flashed him a sarcastic smile. 
“Haha,” Jay replied flatly, unamused. “It’ll be an easy party, don’t worry, you won’t get mauled. I’ll just introduce you around and then you go have some drinks, soon we’ll be back before you know it,”
“You’re not drinking right?”
“You think I’d like to be charged with a DUI?”
“Have you ever thought about that when you drive multiple girls home after parties?”
“It’s not nice to slut shame,”
“Whatever you say.”
The car ride to the house was quick and loud. It was calming when you and Jay were vibing to some music along the way up until the two of you started fighting over who was the best rapper in the industry, that eventually led to debating which genre is the greatest. The debate continued on even after entering the threshold, but nervousness washed over you once you were met with unfamiliar faces. 
“Pop is not even considered in this deb—”
“Jay, hold my hand,”
“What—”
“Hold my hand,” you repeated firmly, and he listened despite being in a daze, intertwining his hand in yours, instinctively pulling you closer. “We have to make this convincing, remember?”
“Right,” he squeezed your hand lightly, unknowingly giving you a hint of reassurance. “Stick by me, some of the people here are not the best,”
“Thanks, I can’t wait to get out of here,”
Jay only rolled his eyes at your words, a slight grin tugged at his lips. He held onto your hand tightly, pulling you further into the crowded house, occasionally turning his head back to check on you. “There, my hockey boys,” he nodded towards a small group by a small makeshift bar, instantly recognizing them from that day at the rink.
“What if I told you now that I have social anxiety,” you whispered into his ears, trying to give him your best pleading eyes. 
“It’ll be a little too late now,” he returned a knowing stare, clearly unfazed by your tricks. Smart bastard. “Come on, you’ve already met them anyway,”
“Y/N!” Heeseung was the one who spotted you first, waving his hand enthusiastically, Sunghoon following suit. You returned a small wave, but you tensed, feeling Jay removing his hand from yours, sneaking onto your waist instead. You were not strong enough for this, you were a woman with desires at the end of the day.
“Hey,” Jay greeted them, resting his hand on your hip, your hand unconsciously travelling to his back, his smirk at your touch going unnoticed.
“So, Y/N, is he still in ‘complicated’ status?” Sunghoon brought up, eliciting a small laugh from Heeseung, meanwhile Jay was equally confused and unimpressed at his teammates’ unseriousness.
“Don’t worry, he has upgraded,” you prodded him, passing a pleased smile to the other two.
“Will we be seeing you at our games?”
“Maybe,” you said vaguely, feeling Jay’s hand leaving your hips and sneaking lower towards the hem of your skirt and slowly pulling at it. You turned your head, meeting his eyes and at that moment, you felt something you denied over the last week. You were weak, you were definitely not God’s strongest soldier. It was bare minimum, but you still appreciated the little things. 
“Let’s go walk around,” Jay suggested, leaning close to you, his face only inches away from yours, his hand squeezing your hip gently. Who knew he was this good at acting?
“Don’t be too protective over her, Jay boy!” Sunghoon called out as he dragged you away from his friends, earning a soft laugh from you and grudging mumbles from him. 
“They tend to be quite a handful sometimes, sorry about that,” Jay said apologetically, leading you to a room full of people playing beer pong and some other drinking games. 
“Don’t worry about it, they seem fine,” you brushed him off, pressing yourself closer to his side in caution as your eyes scanned the whole room. “They don’t look like they believe the fact that you’re actually ‘dating’ someone though,”
“They once said they would be married by the time I found someone,” he scoffed, pulling you into an unoccupied coach. “Which isn’t true,” he continued, placing a pillow on your exposed thighs. “I just haven’t found the one, or just not yet. Maybe I already did and I just didn’t know, ”
“Take it easy, loverboy,” you softly punched his shoulder, making him grin a little. He was cute, you couldn’t lie about that, but your heart continued to. “You’re still young, you should be worrying about it only if you’re 35 and single,”
“You’re right,” he nodded solemnly, his attention averted away. "It's Juyeon," 
At that moment, Juyeon walked into the room, greeting some of his friends and welcoming hugs from them, the atmosphere in the room became noisier. Your gaze followed his figure, blinking quicker than usual as you suddenly felt an overwhelming sense of alarm.
"Don't drool," Jay clicked his tongue, his eyes turning fierce. What's up with this guy now?
"I'm not," you gritted out, your heart dropping slightly at the sight of Juyeon interacting with other girls. You were lying when you said you didn't care, maybe you did.
"I don't get why you like him anyway, he's a jock, a football jock," he said the last part in distaste, making it seem as though footballers were the worst on earth.
"It's called being interested, dumbass. Having someone to admire makes college life fun," you fought back, caving into Jay's touch when he draped his arm over your waist. You shouldn't be liking this skinship. You mustn't.
"He's coming over, he spotted us," Jay mumbled, flashing his smile at Juyeon's approaching figure. "Act natural,"
"Thanks for the advice," you gritted out dryly, shifting around uncomfortably.
"Yo Jay," Juyeon called out to Jay, dabbing your supposed boyfriend up, a friendly smile on his face that blinded your vision and made your heart eyes appear. Fuck.
"Sup," Jay greeted back, breathing out a quiet laugh. “Oh, this is—”
“Y/N,” Juyeon finished Jay’s sentence at once, his gaze shifted onto you now, causing you to shy under his stare. “Partner from Chemistry?”
“That’s me,” you beamed at him, clapping your hands together, absentmindedly leaning further into Jay’s hold. 
“I don’t normally see you at these type of parties,”
“Not a big party person,” you scratched the back of your neck, the feeling of awkwardness creeping up on you. You were never the best at meeting new people, though Juyeon wasn’t exactly a total stranger, but he wasn’t someone you were close to either. 
“Right,” he paused for a moment, peering back and forth between you and Jay, a slight raise of his eyebrow. “So what brings the two of you here? You’re Jay’s date for the night?”
“She’s Jay’s girlfriend, actually,” the man himself spoke beside you, his hand on your waist pulling you closer to his side, a tight smile on his face. "My girlfriend,"
You could feel heat crawling up the back of your neck, choosing to avert your attention away and see what Juyeon’s reaction was. Turns out he was grinning, he was fucking grinning? 
“Jay with a girlfriend? For real?”
Jay let out a scoff, seemingly offended by everyone’s surprise. Hell, if you didn’t know him and found out he had a girlfriend, you’ll be surprised too. “Yes, dickhead, surprise,” he grumbled, earning a chuckle from the footballer, who clearly loved irking Jay.
“Chill, good for you, man. About time,” he lightly slapped Jay’s shoulder and you sat quietly, not knowing what to say either. You really wanted to leave. “I’ll be at tomorrow’s match, see you,”
“Yeah, yeah, bye,” Jay bid a half-assed goodbye to Juyeon while you just waved at him instead, a tight lipped smile on your face. Once he was out of the picture, your head whipped to stare at the hockey player next to you, an impatient plea to leave this party written all over your features.
“Fine,” he sighed, letting you slip your hand in his. “How was all that?” he asked coolly, but you noticed a hint of displeasure in his tone, yet you waved it off again.
“I don’t know, he’s … okay, I guess,” you shrugged, truly confused about your current feelings. The thought of Jay stormed your mind. Juyeon? That’s the last J name of your concerns right now. But will you ever admit out loud that you were thinking about Jay, the man who constantly gives you headaches? Fuck no.
“Just ‘okay’?”
You hummed in response, sensing that he was a little bit more at ease after hearing your answer. He was easy to read, too easy.
“Does that make me better than him?”
“Woah, don’t get too ahead of yourself, Park,”
“Don’t hurt my ego like that,”
“Am not,”
“Come on, say I’m better, hotter and funnier than him,” he egged on, inching closer to you, a teasing grin stretched on that stupid face of his. 
“Zipping my mouth shut,” you gestured at your lips, deadpanning at him.
“You’re too afraid to admit it,”
“Whatever you say, big head,” you bumped his shoulder and he stumbled a little, narrowing his eyes at you, a challenging smirk plastered on his face. Oh no.
In the next minute, Jay swept you off your feet and threw you over his shoulder. You let out a sharp yelp, unable to process everything at once, hearing Jay’s playful laugh fill the streets in the quietness of the night. 
“You’re so dead,” you seethed, hitting his back with your utmost might, but he only cackled in response.
“Whatever you say, pea brain,” Jay mocked, earning him another hard punch on his back and this time, it actually made him wince. Choosing the safest route for himself, he kept his mouth shut.
Thus, you had no choice but to give into hanging over a hockey boy’s shoulder as the two of you ventured into the night in search of his car, not realising the mess you’ll be facing soon.
Tumblr media
IT’S OFFICIAL. YOU'VE REACHED THE STAGE OF REGRET.
It was the next day, hockey game day, you turned up at the arena and copped a good seat. You might be wondering, ‘what’s so bad about a hockey game to the point you start regretting everything’, well if you could trade places with anybody in the world right now, you would, and that said a lot. 
Jay had greeted you for barely five minutes before the game, rushing away immediately once he saw the time, giving you an apologetic hug that almost had you convinced this was real. What he hadn’t prepared you earlier, was the fact that there was a fucking kiss cam. One look at the jumbotron and you knew you were doomed.
‘KISS CAM’ was written clearly on the screen, the music in the arena was drowned out completely and you felt your heart drop. It might’ve seemed overdramatic for you to react like this, but in reality, kissing a stranger was terrifying. Your first kiss was already a nightmare, let alone kissing someone you don’t know, what would make it better?
“Nothing will happen,” you assured yourself over and over again, unaware that somebody had just slipped in the seat beside you.
“Hey,” 
You flinched, brought out of your daze and you met Juyeon’s eyes. Good-fucking-bye to the world right now. His smile distracted you, having you muted and malfunctioning. Cool. This was cool. You’re cool. 
“Hi,” you gave him a small smile that turned out more awkward than you thought. 
“Supporting Jay today?” he nodded at the rink where the team was currently practising, your eyes wandering over to Jay’s figure.
“Him and the team. School spirit, you know?”
“Yeah,” he chuckled. “I heard about the kiss cam—” he pointed towards the screen and you wanted to close your eyes instead, but basic courtesy mattered. “—apparently for raising funds,”
Raising funds through a kiss cam? What was this? ‘The Kissing Booth: hockey edition’?
“That’s … interesting,” you uttered, nervousness laced in your voice. 
You were saved from the awkward tension just as the game started, secretly wishing you had Minji with you instead of a mouth watering football player next to you. The game was intense, effectively grabbing your attention away from your surroundings, but the flash of the kiss cam starting its quest on finding couples was distracting.
As the game progressed, you grew confident that your mind was just playing games in making you anxious and nothing would happen. Your mind eased as you joined in the cheering when the home team finally scored a goal, watching the team celebrate had you grinning, staring down at a specific number 99. 
The high soon died down and you chose to glance up at the jumbotron, the kiss cam focused on a cute couple who were weirdly making out instead of just simply kissing. PDA, yucks. It then swiftly moved on to another pair, thankfully. They were probably strangers, but being good sports, they shared a quick peck, earning some ‘awh’s from the crowd. Another change, your eyebrows furrowed, a frown tugged at your lips, was that—
It was. Your nightmare has come. For a moment you wondered if you were hallucinating, but a couple of beats later, you came to the realisation you were not. The kiss cam was focused on you and … Juyeon. When you said you were interested in him, you didn’t mean this, nope not at all. 
Embarrassingly and reluctantly, you avoided the footballer’s gaze and shook your head, feeling tripped out as you stared at your own self on the screen, catching some disappointed groans from a few people. “I have a boyfriend,” you mouthed, trying your best to seem apologetic, but Juyeon didn’t look like he wanted to back down.
“You don’t want to kiss me?” he murmured, attempting to seem as lowkey as possible. 
“I have a boyfriend, sorry,” you pressed your lips into a flat line, not enjoying this for a bit. The kiss cam swerved away to pinpoint another pair, but Juyeon was persistent.
“Come on, don’t pretend you don’t want to kiss me,”
You glared at him, your features turning sour, in disbelief at what you’ve just heard. Was he serious? “Excuse me?”
“Forget about Jay, I know how you were looking at me that night,” he whistled lowly under his breath and you scoffed, but you were caught off guard almost immediately when you saw the kiss cam lighting up in the corner of your eyes, and it zoomed into your face again. FML.
“He’ll never know,” he arched an eyebrow, welcoming the idea hugely. Scumbag. 
“I don’t stoop that low you fuck—”
Before you could jump Juyeon and curse him out, a loud crash startled you and everyone around. You jumped in your seat, your head turned towards the direction of the noise. Jay was in front of you, his fist against the glass, helmet in hand. If looks could kill, you would’ve been dead. 
Wet strands of hair stuck onto his forehead, his eyes narrowed into a death stare as it trained on Juyeon. “Fuck off,” he yelled through the glass barrier, his fist clenched. “Back off,”
The blood in Juyeon’s face was completely drained, obvious embarrassment and shame washed over him, but knowing him and his ego, he played it off, pretending as if that didn’t happen. “Whatever,” he got up from his seat and stormed off. Deserved.
You hid the small smile forming on your face, your sights redirecting towards Jay, your heart beating wildly against your chest the moment you met his eyes, softening when he mouth ‘you okay’. You nodded back at him and you could tell he instantly loosened up, returning a half smile before turning away and joining the team.
Moral of the story: don’t fall for playboys, which sounded pretty ironic considering the situation you were currently in.
The game had thankfully ended in a win for the home team, and honestly, that whole experience seemed to be years instead of just a few hours. Never again. You were glad to see Jay and everyone else cheerfully exiting the rink, taking that as the cue for you to chase after him. 
Upon arriving outside the locker room, you found yourself standing awkwardly as you waited for him to appear, greeting his friends half-heartedly when they were on the way out. Your patience was thinning and only until then, he only decided to appear, a little shocked that you were there.
“Congrats on the win,��� you joined his side and walked together, letting his shoulder brush against yours softly.
“Thanks,” he mumbled, a lollipop in his mouth. You didn’t enjoy this questionable tension between the two of you, noticing his rigidness. 
“Hey!” You cut to the chase, snatching the lollipop from his lips, finally getting his attention as he turned to stare at you with wide eyes. “What was that for?” 
“Nothing,” he shrugged it off, and you didn't understand why, you could tell he was blatantly lying.
“You're acting really weird,” you narrowed your eyes at him in accusation.
“Am I?”
“Ask yourself that,” you huffed, instinctively putting the lollipop into your mouth, not bothering to care anymore. “Anyway, I think mission Juyeon is officially cancelled, he gives me the ick, didn't know he was such a big douchebag,”
“Told you so,” he shrugged, his gaze wavering from your lips to your eyes. Woah. “Keep the lollipop, I have loads,” he gulped, avoiding your eyes. 
“Drop me off?” You suggested, putting on the most convincing, sweetest smile, which somehow worked since it got Jay to grudgingly mumble a ‘yes’.
“I would give you a kiss right now if I could.” You skipped on, leaving Jay to tail behind you, your words ringing in his ears.
Maybe somewhere inside, he did wish you would.
Tumblr media
“SEE? I TOLD YOU HE WAS A JERK,”
Minji continuously flailed her hands dramatically as you and she made your way through the campus. It was the week of the hockey event that Jay had mentioned, meaning another restless week of frat party, dress shopping, hockey match and then a fancy event. 
“Yes, yes, I know, you've made your point,” you grumbled annoyingly, having not one but two people saying the same to you. 
“It's quite cute that Jay stood up for you though,” she nudged your side, her eyes glinting. You knew what she was indicating.
“Fake dating, fake. Not real,” you threw your hands up in defeat, but internally, you were beginning to second guess if you even wanted to call it fake, maybe deep down, you didn't want it to be.
“Whatever helps you sleep at night,” Minji mumbled, but you were able to catch onto it, huffing in denial next to her. “Anyway, when are you going shopping? The event’s this weekend already,”
“Fuck, I forgot,” you brushed your hand through your hair, having another headache to add on to. “Do you have any nice fancy dresses? I'm sure Jay is ready but I'm not,”
Minji flashed a knowing smirk, she definitely had something up her sleeve. “You know I do. I'll bring them to your dorm and we're going to have a whole makeover,”
“You're not going to burn my hair this time right?”
“We'll see.”
A few days had passed and it was your second hockey pregame party, repeatedly cursing that your Thursday night was ruined once more, but seeing Jay’s pleading eyes at your doorstep, you just had to give in again. How did he have that effect on you?
“She’s going to be at the party,” Jay noted casually on the way to the house. 
“Oh,” you pursed your lips, not knowing what to say next. “What’s her name? You’ve never mentioned,”
“Sujin,”
“Her?” you gasped, eyes widened in plain shock. Out of all the girls he could’ve had his heart broken by, it had to be the infamous Instagram blogger who was known to play around. Look, you've always been a supporter of every woman's rights and wrongs, but she was way beyond any defending. 
“Yeah …” Jay sighed, his fingers drumming lightly on the steering wheel. “We were high school lovers, but things went sour in college,”
“Well, forget about her, you want to prove her wrong right? Then prove her wrong,”
“You're oddly over confident today,”
“What's wrong with confidence, Park?”
He glanced over at you briefly, a wide grin on his face as he shook his head. “Nothing. I just like to see confidence on you,”
You rolled your eyes, but something inside you twisted, finding yourself ignoring whatever feelings that sparked internally. “Are you ready for Saturday?” 
“Suit’s ready, but me? So so, I guess,”
“You sound pessimistic, don’t tell me you’re starting to regret all these,”
“Hey, now you’re just putting words into my mouth,” Jay grumbled, putting the car into park right outside of the familiar frat house. “I won’t ever regret you or this whole thing, now come on,”
You weren’t left a single second to even process the fact that he said he won't regret you. Yes, you, not just this stupid scheme, but you. Upon entering the threshold, you were met with a cup of beer thrusted into your face from a passing Heeseung, your other hand occupied by Jay’s, trying your best to make it past the crowd without stumbling over. Everything was a whirlwind.
“Fuck, she’s here,” his hold on you tightened and you followed his line of sight, your gaze landing on the over dressed Instagram model, her skirt a little too small and her heels a little too high.
“Just act normal, Jay. You said you’re over her, then you should act like that,” you yanked him close to you, walking over to the mini bar, pouring yourself a drink. “That’s her boyfriend?” you nodded at the taller man towering beside Sujin, his face contrary to the one you had in mind.
“Yeah, that’s Intak,” he said quietly, aware of the lingering ears around the two of you. “Seeing him every time we have a game against his team is revolting, I can’t believe I have to see him here too,”
“Then look away,” you pushed his face softly, earning a huff of annoyance from him. “Come on, it’ll be over in an hour,” you rubbed the side of his arm in comfort, his lips twisting into an endearing smile.
“You’re right,” Jay sighed, blinking harshly, his gaze flickering between you and your surroundings. “I’ll go find Heeseung and Sunghoon for a moment, is that okay? Will you be alright alone? You can come along too. If you want—”
“It’s fine, Jay, really,” you laughed, putting your hands up to stop him from blabbering on. “Go find them, call me when it’s time to leave,”
“I’ll come find you once I’m done,” he held onto your shoulder, pressing a hasty kiss on the top of your head before turning away to another room in search of his hockey teammates.
Safe to say you were able to find yourself a company, who turned out to be a girl you knew from your literature class. Why was she there? She didn’t know either and you thought the best was to not question further, grateful that you were not alone in this house of strangers. The clock was spinning fast, soon it was already past midnight and Jay was nowhere to be seen. You were praying that you weren’t in a remake of ‘Scream’.
The feeling of unease crept up on you and you couldn’t handle it any longer, standing up from the couch and storming into different rooms of the house, all occupied and filled with people, none of those were Jay. The last option you had was the upstairs, which lied the unimaginable behind those rooms that you were not about to explore, thank you very much!
Wandering the upstairs of a rather large frat house all alone was quite a challenge, especially when you were trying to hunt a 5’10 hockey jock, adding onto the fact that you literally and physically bumped (crashed, actually) into said hockey jock’s enemy in the corridors, shit was turning upside down.
“Fuck—sorry,” you coughed out, regretting your last sober choice of bringing your beer cup along.
“Shit—it’s fine, no worries,” Jay's enemy/ex’s boyfriend, Intak, reassured, dabbing himself off with some napkins that were miraculously lying on a table nearby.
“I feel bad, if you need it cleaned I can help,” you frowned, leaning over to see the damage you’ve caused: a yellowish stain on his once perfect white tee.
“No, it’s completely fine, shit happens,” he laughed, waving his hand, an awkward silence filling the air momentarily. “So, why are you even up here?”
“Oh—I’m finding … someone,” you gave him a tight-lipped smile. 
His eyes lit up. “Me too, actually. I can’t leave the party without them and gosh, I’m getting a headache already,” 
“Twins, I think the beer is getting to me soon,” you clapped your hands, glancing around for any signs of Jay.
“Before that happens, may I know your name first?”
You raised your eyebrows. “It’s Y/N,”
“Nice to meet you, Y/N, I’m Intak,” you accepted his handshake, trying your best to be friendly and not seem awkward. "I play in a hockey team, the one that's playing against yours for tomorrow,"
"Right," you nodded as though you hadn't already known that prior to this. "I would wish you good luck on normal occasions, but since it's against the home team … I need to keep my school spirit,"
Intak let out a small laugh. "Totally understandable," he met your eyes, a hint of sheer curiosity in them. "Do you have a date for tonight—"
"Intak?"
"Y/N?"
You, together with the hockey player, turned around to find each other's partners standing down the corridor next to one another, a look of confusion written on their faces. But you, you had anger and an obvious "what the fuck" painted onto your expressions, and it was clear that Jay had noticed it too when he came close.
"Uh—we're leaving now, bye," Jay murmured, grabbing a hold of your wrist and dragging you away, giving you only a brief second to say goodbye to Intak.
You didn't and couldn't understand what was happening, just hating the way Jay was acting. You kept your mouth shut until you were completely out of the house and walking towards the car when you yanked your hand out of Jay's hold, causing him to look back at you in a daze.
"God, you're such a dickhead!" You seethed, breathing heavily.
"What?"
"'What' was all you could say? Jay, you left me in that party alone for God knows how long and then you disappear on me just for me to find you running back to your ex? Make it make sense,"
"I didn't run back to her, Y/N, for fuck's sake," Jay ran a hand through his hair, his lips pressed into a thin line. "She pulled me away and started claiming weird shit that never happened, I wanted to leave but she kept persisting until I managed to break down the fucking doorknob,"
Silence fell between the two of you, the dark of the night consuming your thoughts and the moon was staring down at you, your mind and soul in a daze. You couldn't understand why you were feeling this way, after all, it was fake, it wasn't real.
"I believe you," you sighed, gulping down the anxiety building up within you. "Forget it, it's fine, sorry for being so worked up, it's not like we're really dating, right?"
You looked at him, noticing his eyebrows furrowed and eyes glinting with something unreadable, his mouth opened then shut, wanting to say something but nothing came out, heaving a small sigh. "You're right, it's not real anyway."
As much as you wished to forget it, you couldn't. The way he wasn't even fighting and being in denial, his words stemming sadness into your heart and reminding you again and again that it was never real to begin with. 
Fake dating was meant to be fake, wasn't it?
Tumblr media
“I CAN'T BELIEVE YOU'VE BROUGHT ME HERE FOR EMOTIONAL SUPPORT,”
Friday night hockey was something you loved, but after what happened yesterday, you dreaded coming. 
You still remembered the tension filled air on the way back to your dorms, the silence in the car and the quiet exchange of "goodnight" haunted you. Crashing into Minji's bed having a breakdown definitely made you two come to a conclusion that you were indeed harbouring something for Jay. Were you going to straightforwardly admit it? Never.
Now, you had zero balls to be at the game alone, choosing to drag Minji along and you knew even if she was vocally complaining, she was actually enjoying the hot hockey players secretly.  
"Did you talk to Jay after yesterday night?"
"No,"
"Will you?"
"Maybe,"
"I think that's a 'yes',"
You stared pointedly at her and she shrugged, resuming her watch on the hockey players practising. You watched along as well, your eyes instinctively following Jay's figure, but then you noticed Intak on the far end as well. Somehow, you knew that this match wasn't about to end well.
"Is this seat empty?" A voice startled you from your internal monologue, snapping your head just in time to see little miss ex standing over you.
"Oh—yes," you said uneasily, grabbing your phone immediately to text Minji.
you: it's her
jiji: who
you: the girl next to me!!! that's jay's EX.
jiji: YOU'RE KIDDING
you: i wished
You exchanged a wary look with Minji, playing it off as natural as you could as you sensed Sujin sitting next to you, elbowing Minji in panic and she does the same back to you, making it look wild and weird from a third perspective. You stopped the frenzy nudging war with Minji, swallowing thickly and hoping nothing happened, but actually, something did, hooray!
“You’re Jay’s girlfriend?” you heard her asking and you turned your head slowly, meeting her blinking eyes and curious gaze.
“Yes,” you tried your best for it to sound convincing, and it seemed to have worked.
“Cool.” she whistled under her breath, returning her gaze back to the arena and you resisted rolling your eyes, biting back a snarl.
The game started in a haze, both teams trying to break one another’s defence and score a goal, yet it all failed in the end, turning it into a tie for two periods straight. You and Minji sighed in disappointment, watching the home team giving their best to not collapse there and then. Sujin, on the other hand, looked nervous throughout the game, occasionally standing up and clapping.
The third period approached in a blink of an eye, two teams eager to score and win, the tension was high and you could tell they were sweating heavy loads. It began in a peaceful and lowkey attack, but shoving and punches were seen here and there, earning entertained jeers from the crowd. You sighed, both in exasperation and stress, hoping nothing would land Jay a bad game. But everything proved you the opposite once more.
Your eyes widening in the next moment, noticing two players shoving each other and throwing gloves onto the ice, punches almost thrown but was interjected by the referee and teammates. Lord, it just had to be Jay and Intak, it was basically written in the stars, wasn’t it?
Once the game had ended, you couldn’t care less about the scoreline, listening to Minji’s brief rants on how not to fumble your emotions about Jay and stopping her halfway through, pointing to the clock as your time ticked. You were attempting to squeeze your way out when you heard a cough behind you and to your disappointment, it had to be Sujin.
“You’re aware of who I am, right?” you heard the sneer in her voice, holding in the urge to rip her hair out and instead, remained facing away from her.
“Don’t worry, I do. You’re Jay’s dumpster ex girlfriend,”
“What—”
Timing was right and you took the chance to slip away, thanking the world that you were finally miles away from Jay’s dusty ex. All of that didn’t matter though, the important aspect was finding Jay now, awkwardly speed walking to locate Jay’s whereabouts.
Upon arriving at the front of the familiar locker rooms, you patiently waited, feeling a sense of deja vu. That wasn’t all. Your anxiety was at its highest point. What were you about to say to Jay? Can you even face him? What if you pussied out and ran away—
“Y/N?” speaking of the devil …
You whipped your head around, Jay’s curious eyes meeting your panicked ones, your whole body frozen to the spot as he approached you, taking a cautious step at a time. 
“Are you alright? Were you hurt?” you couldn’t help it, after seeing the minor fight on ice, your first natural instinct was to ask him this. Jay lowered his head, hiding a smile that was threatening to appear. A small sense of relief washed over you.
“I’m fine … thanks. Just a small conflict,” he muttered, then proceeded by a brief moment of silence, where you swore it felt like forever considering how it was just quiet stares and exchanges of friendly smiles, and you couldn’t really handle it much longer, being the one to break first.
“Jay, I—uhm—yesterday, the party thing, I’m sorry about it, I don’t want that to make things awkward between us,” you gesture wildly at the space between you and him, his eyes following your movements. “And it’s wrong for me to say those stuff,”
“It’s partially my fault too. I’m the one to blame to ditch you,”
“I’m the one who accused you of shit and I feel really bad for assuming something I don’t know. I just got worked up, I’m sorry,”
He took hold of your hands, grasping onto them tightly as though he was fearing you’d run away. “Y/N, do you trust me?”
Do you trust him?
In a heartbeat, the answer was an obvious ‘yes’. You had to admit, you did initially find him annoying and a total fuckboy that you knew would break your heart, but as time passed, you couldn’t care anymore. Even if it meant your heart was on the line, at least you knew Jay was genuine about you; at the very least, there was someone who would stand up for you, listen to your rants about music, and put you first. 
“Yes,”
Jay pulled your hand, practically yanking you towards him, landing on his chest with a thud and a heart thumping crazily, butterflies swarmed your stomach and you could feel heaven getting close, aka you dying in Jay’s arms. He pressed his head on the top of yours, feeling his heart beating against your chest, his cologne no stranger to you now. 
“When I said you’re my girl, I meant it, it doesn’t matter if it’s fake or not, I’ll always care for you, and I will never ever hurt you, so please—” an underlying mix of desperation, hurt and care were laced in his voice, and you were weak, weak for him. “—trust me, and even if it means I need to earn it or whatever, I will,”
“Jay…” you faltered, resting your chin on his shoulder, arms wrapped around his waist. “I’m sorry for not trusting you, I should’ve heard you out, of course I do trust you,”
Jay was silent for a second, whispering a quiet ‘thank you’ and pressing a swift kiss on your forehead, which didn’t get completely unnoticed by you, but you decided to not say anything about it, letting yourself melt into his arms. Internally, you were conflicted, torn between whether your feelings about him were mutual, you were scared, petrified that you’ve already broken the first and most important rule of fake dating:
Do not catch feelings.
Tumblr media
jayjay: DUMPSTER EX? you’re soo foul for that
you: truth hurts unfortunately :/ you never told me what happened that day
jayjay: it was stupid, he just started attacking me, for OBVIOUS reasons, so i couldn’t help defending back :( 
you: i’m glad you didn’t get your ass beat
jayjay: gasp you have zero confidence in me!
Tossing your phone to the side was a hard task considering how Jay was basically spamming your message inbox, ranging from panicking about the event that was happening at night to gossiping about exes, he was certainly experiencing many emotions. You were similarly distraught, having a hard time choosing between a black dress or a red one, placing them in front of you for evaluations that just ended up failing.
“By the time we’re done I think the party would’ve ended,” Minji groaned from her side of the room, lounging on her bed as she watched you glancing between the two dresses.
“Not helping,”
“I literally chose the black one and you told me, in your words, ‘what if I looked better in red’ girl, that’s your problem now,”
“I'm indecisive and you know that,” you mumbled sourly, picking the black dress in the end. You were grateful for the fashion Gods, the dress was an absolute banger and you didn’t understand how you even picked it out, you just knew. 
“See? I told you,” Minji whistled, manhandling you to do a forceful 180 turn for her, and from the way her face morphed into a smile, you could tell she was pleased. "Jay would drop dead when he sees you," she squealed.
"God I hope not," you joked, squeezing onto your clutch tightly.
jayjay: im outside :)
"He's here," you hissed, becoming frantic all of a sudden, double checking everything at the last minute before slipping your heels on, making sure to give Minji a small kiss on the cheek too and off you went dashing towards Jay's car, noticing his figure faced away, leaning against his car as you got nearer.
"Hi," you panted, masking the fatigue and exhaustion from the amount of panic and stress you went through in those 5 minutes.
You could see Jay glancing up from his phone, then shoving it into his back pocket and turning his head around, his burning eyes locked with yours. A smirk slowly stretched onto his lips, a mischievous glint in his gaze as he sweeped your figure. You were no better, eyes shamelessly boring into him, scanning his attire and you swore your legs were shaking.
Him in a plain black suit shouldn’t be affecting you, but it was. The prada tie hung around neck was equally distracting, how was he making something so simple seem breathtaking? You hated him for it, yes, you absolutely do. His hair was styled back and a single loose strand hung over his forehead, practically challenging the Zayn Malik look.
“Hey,” his hand instinctively reached for your waist, bringing you closer to him. “You look amazing—you’re amazing,” he breathed out, completely transfixed.
“You look great too,” that’s a lie, he looked more than just great.
“Getting complimented by you for once? Honoured,”
“You should be,” you snickered, letting Jay guide you to the passenger side and adoring the way he opened the car door for you. Although it was a small gesture, you appreciate it greatly considering how literally no man had done this for you before. Known fuckboy Park Jong Seong was proving you wrong day by day.
The drive there began quietly and you knew it was going to take a while since it’s quite a distance away, fearing it would be awkward silence once more, but the moment Jay had switched the radio on, the music discourse started, then it progressed into movies. 
“I can’t believe you hate rom coms!” you gasped, staring at him in horror as he fumbled to defend himself.
“Look, I didn’t say hate, but it’s just pointless,” 
“You’re telling me you’ve never watched the classic rom coms before?” you dramatically leaned away from him, earning a huff.
“No,” he grumbled.
“That’s criminal,” you exclaimed, a little evil idea forming in that brain of yours. “I’m making you watch them,”
“You’re so not,”
“Oh, I am,” you beamed, clapping your hands together. “There are ‘How to Lose a Guy in 10 days’, ‘Notting Hill’, ‘Pretty Woman’, the list goes on and on and Julia Roberts is literally a rom com legend—oh my God, please tell me you’ve watched Mamma Mia before,”
“Of course I did! I’m not that bad,”
“I’m glad,” you let out a sigh of relief, sinking into your seat and making a mental note to write down a list of rom coms to watch with Jay. A rom com marathon date with Jay, cute. The rest of the ride, you listened to Jay’s hilarious rants about the pizzas he tried and the interesting stories from his trips abroad.
The venue was absolutely spacious and screamed sponsored. It was at some five star hotel, the parking was already a clear indication that it wasn’t a hotel to be taken lightly in consideration. Even Jay was surprised, his head twisting and turning to look at the small details of everything, his hand in yours and it genuinely felt like you were dragging a curious child around.
“Didn’t know the hockey associations had this in them,” he cooed, entering the ballroom of the hotel, a big hockey banner hung at the stage, round tables littered here and there, a huge space in the middle for the dancefloor and as for the cherry on top, a wide array of food and drinks displayed freely. Maybe you didn’t fully regret coming.
Despite all that, you only managed to recognise one or two people from the hockey team, but the rest of them were plain strangers, players from different schools that only Jay could probably recognise. You simply felt uneasy.
“Remind me what this is for again?”
“Literally nothing, it’s the same as the frat party but classier I suppose,”
“Real charming,”
“Come on,” Jay said quietly, his hand resting on the small of your back, guiding you towards your designated table, actually glad for once when you saw the hockey team, including Heeseung and Sunghoon. “It’s going to be over soon and hey, you can always talk to the guy’s dates,”
“Will I be seeing their dates the next time?” you arched a quizzical eyebrow at him, knowing their reputation, you wondered if this was a one night exclusive kinda thing, but you weren’t there to judge.
“Hard to say,” Jay frowned.
“Wait—” you paused, placing an arm on Jay’s shoulder. “What about us? This whole deal was for tonight, but what happens after?”
“I don’t think it’s the right time to discuss this right now, Y/N,” Jay glanced back and forth between you and his friends at the table, making sure his voice was extra hushed. “Let’s just survive tonight first, and we’ll talk about the rest after. Capiche?”
You nodded, but deep down, you could tell that talk was already dreaded by the both of you. You’d hate to admit it, but after being with Jay for a while, you were not willing to let go. What if he didn’t feel the same and you’ll just end up being those clingy girls he dated before? It was such a wrong time to think about all these when you’re in the middle of some stupid event, but your mind has its way to put you off, always.
“You okay?” Jay was close, his eyes scanning your face for any signs of emotions. It definitely helped in snapping you out of your daze, and it took your utmost willpower to not shy away or kiss him at that exact moment, he was so pretty, painfully pretty when he was up close for you to be able to capture his every feature. 
“Yeah,” you breathed out, squeezing his shoulder lightly before looping your arm around his. “I’m a little hungry,”
“Me too,” Jay groaned, his head turning over to where the buffet was, evidently displaying heart eyes. “I’ll go get us some, you should join them first, and save me a seat too, please,”
“‘Please’? That’s a first from you,”
“Do you want your food or not?”
“You’re so romantic whenever you threaten me,” you shooed Jay away, forcing him to fetch some food while you trudged your way towards the table, Heeseung and Sunghoon nodded at you when you caught their eyes.
"Y/N," the two hockey players regarded you, their dates giving you friendly smiles and you took a seat next to Heeseung's date.
"Heeseung, Sunghoon," you raised your eyebrows. "And the ladies," you have to admit it, at least they had great tastes.
Heeseung and Sunghoon introduced you to their dates, one was Chaewon and the other was Kazuha, both of them being the nicest people you've ever met and you swore you were about to ditch Jay for them instead.
"Hey," Jay finally appeared, his hands were occupied by two plates and thankfully, he was smart enough to fill them up to the brim. He slipped into the empty seat next to you, acknowledging his friends and their dates.
“This is a first,” Heeseung noted thoughtfully, catching both you and Jay off guard.
“Hm?” Jay hummed, passing you the utensils.
“Don’t ‘hm’ me. This is literally my first time seeing you treat a girl like this,”
Jay stared back at his friends as if they were insane, you just stayed amused. “You’re making me sound like I’ve treated other girls like a dickhead,”
“You know what I mean,” 
You didn’t. But it seemed Jay did, silently sighing underneath his breath and shrugging Heeseung’s words off, turning to you instead. “I got you some strawberries, I remembered you mentioned loving them once,”
There was a tug at your heartstrings, it was your absolute weakness: people remembering your favourite things; Jay most definitely had a great way to get into your heart and mind. He was slowly but surely ticking off the boxes on the list you’ve created in your head, titled ‘things Jay is forbidden to do so that I WON’T end up liking him’ and he was proving you wrong by checking them off one at a time, damn it.
The food wasn’t the best but the company surely did help. The whole of the hockey team was cracking jokes around the table, you were laughing until your stomach was hurting, the atmosphere high and wild, you were too busy trying not to choke at the jokes to notice that you were practically leaning onto Jay’s side, shoulders touching and you could feel the warmth emanating from his body.
What’s a fancy event without a speech at the end of the night? Other than that boring part, you were relieved to hear there was at least a dance to end the night off on a high with, since the dance floor was there for a reason. The team around the table started dispersing in pairs, until it was only you and Jay left. 
“Were you waiting for me to ask?” Jay teased, his eyes lingering on you.
“Isn’t that how it’s supposed to go usually?” you mused, raising an accusing eyebrow at him and he stifled a laugh. 
“I’m playing with you. I was waiting for the other’s to leave first so that I could be alone with you—” he bumped your shoulder gently with his, “—and ask you personally,” he stood up from his seat, the soft glow from the lights shone across his face, alighting his delicate features, he looked like a fantasy, too good to be true, and maybe he was. “Would you like to dance?” 
“I would love to,” you accepted his hand, allowing him to lead you to the dancefloor and you suddenly felt nervous, hoping you wouldn’t end up tripping or stumbling, or worse, stepping on Jay’s toes. Somehow, he would always sense your distress and this time, it was the same. 
“Don’t be nervous, I won’t start hoisting you up like those Disney shows,” he said with his recognizable playful smile that you’ve grown used to. 
You were facing him now, his hand not leaving yours and only tightening its grip, pulling you in closer and closer until you were only mere inches away from him, noses almost touching. The other hand of his rested on your waist, yours on his shoulder, eyes not leaving one another. The lights were dimmed down, slow music was playing in the background and you swore you saw something sparked in his gaze as you two started moving to the rhythm. 
“I might’ve said it earlier already but genuinely, you’re absolutely breathtaking,” Jay whispered, his voice low and his gaze piercing.
“Have my love potions finally worked?” you smiled, hoping and praying that Jay wouldn’t notice the slight tinge of pink rising to your cheeks.
“I think they did,” Jay nodded slowly, biting his lip for a moment before leaning even more closer, space was basically nonexistent between you two now. “I might want to keep you forever now, keep you by my side and never let you go,”
Could this be his answer? An answer to your countless doubts and thoughts that piled in your mind. This was stupid, he was stupid. Stupidly handsome and charming it had you going insane and you thought hockey jocks wouldn’t have this effect on you, guess you were wrong all along.
“Really?” you breathed out, barely audible, but expectant. 
“I don’t think I was ever joking,” 
“I—”
“Jay!” Sunghoon’s voice boomed through the crowd and you could see the hope drain from Jay’s face, his eyebrows furrowed and features twisted into annoyance. “Dude, I heard there’s some free booze that costs thousands! Can we please go check it out—am I interrupting something here?”
“You think?” Jay seethed out, taking off his suit’s blazer and placing them over your shoulders. It was something small, maybe even insignificant to others, but to you, it meant a lot, and you were hoping no one noticed your slight shyness after. 
“It’s fine,” you placed a reassuring hand on Sunghoon’s shoulder. “You can whisk him off for the night, but don’t make him drunk,”
“Got it,” Sunghoon showed you two thumbs up, throwing his arm around Jay's shoulder. 
“I’ll see you later? Call me if you need anything,” 
“I’ll be okay, I have Chaewon and Zuha here,”
Jay only silently nodded, begrudgingly following his friend but making sure to turn back and take a last peek of you before fully disappearing away. You were left alone standing in the midst of the dancefloor, feeling a pair of eyes on you and you knew exactly who it was, Sujin.
Maybe this whole plan worked too well, it had you totally forgetting its original objectives and you couldn’t tell if it was a good or bad thing. All you knew was that you needed a long and deep talk with Jay and whatever he said earlier definitely had you on the edge all night while he was somewhere getting wasted. Hey, someone had to be the responsible one, and it happened to be you.
“You’re telling me Heeseung spilled a drink over a girl a few days ago?”
You found yourself giggling and messing around with Chaewon and Kazuha, the three of you sharing odd stories of one another and it evolved into gossiping about your own dates. Chaewon turned to you, a cheeky grin wide on her face.
“You and Jay are dating right?” she nudged you playfully, Kazuha followed with a smile.
“I guess so?” you threw your hands up, sipping from a drink you didn’t really like but still endured.
“You seem unsure—oh wow, did he never confirm it between you two?”
“No, not that—” it was that, it was complicated. “It’s just something’s bugging me,”
“What is?” the two girls leaned in closer. 
“Just, the other day at a party, I saw him coming out of a room with his ex and I got mad—”
“Rightfully so,” 
“I heard his explanation and I felt bad for jumping to conclusions,”
“Oh, honey, it’s our first instinct, you don’t have to beat yourself up for it,”
“Yeah, I know, I do trust him, he didn’t seem to look like he had just freshly made out with her or anything, but something in me just doesn’t feel like I’ve fully made peace with this whole thing,”
“Which means?”
“I don’t know exactly, I think I’m either super paranoid or simply scared something bad might happen,” 
“I might’ve not been with Sunghoon for long enough and I don’t even think we’re a thing, but I’ve hung out with him and Jay included, and it’s enough for me to say that Jay is a good guy. He might be a well known fuckboy at first encounter, but the more you got to know him, you’ll realise he’s actually the sweetest and nicest guy ever,”
“Excluding his reputation,” Chaewon added thoughtfully.
“Excluding that,” Kazuha repeated. “But he probably changed, I don’t see him at many parties anymore after he got with you. It’s cheesy to say but I think you might’ve changed that man,”
“Mhm,” Chaewon nodded along, placing a hand on your thigh and giving you a comforting pat. “Please don’t let some ex overwhelm your thoughts and sever your relationship, I’ve been there and it sucked, believe me. I see the way he looks at you, I can tell he likes you a lot, I really don’t wish anything to happen between you two,”
“Plus, the three of us needs to hang out more, go on dates together, it’ll be fun,”
“Agreed,” 
You broke into a smile, laughing softly and leaned into Chaewon’s embrace. “I know we’ve barely met but would it be too soon to say I love you guys?”
“Never,” the two girls snickered in unison. 
The night gradually passed without your knowledge, time practically nonexistent when you spoke to your new found besties, only noticing how late it was when you saw people slowly making their way to the exit, hand in hand with their partners, and you thought of Jay. Please don’t be high or drunk somewhere, or just both in general.
“God, look at the time, should we go find them?” Kazuha pointed out, Chaewon stretching her arms out beside her while you readjusted yourself uncomfortably in this dress. 
“We really should, they’re probably drunk or something. Come on,” Kazuha pulled you up and it took your utmost strength to not collapse from the pain, all thanks to your killer heels you were now wincing everytime you walked. Beauty is pain indeed.
It didn’t take long for the three of you to spot the hockey guys, distinguishing Sunghoon’s glorious silver hair that shone particularly brighter under the lights from the mirrorball. Although they seemed sober still, you could tell they were beginning to be at their wits end, but forget about them, Jay was nowhere in sight and you couldn’t help feeling unease.
“Where’s Jay?”
“Oh, Jay?”
“Yes, Jay,” you folded your arm, staring expectantly at them.
“He got a call or something just ten minutes back, he said he was supposed to be back soon, as in right now, but he’s not here,” Heeseung said, trying to take a swig of his cup before it was swatted away by Chaewon. “He did go that way,” he pointed at the door that led out to the terrace.
“I’ll go get him,”
“Do you need any of us to help?” 
“I’ll be fine … for now,” you gave them a smile of assurance, but you yourself were far from being assured.
Trudging your way past the dispersing crowd, you were wondering where Jay was, silently cursing him out as you continued your way even if your shoes were killing you. Never again. The terrace was a nice place to getaway, the open space looked out to a night sky that was illuminated by skyscrapers and stars, plus the cool night breeze made it even better. 
The area was wide, tables and chairs littered here and there, but there was no five feet ten hockey player anywhere. You decided to walk around a little bit more, pulling your phone out and dialling Jay’s number, praying he was somewhere near. There was no way this would be a second reenactment of the party at the beach except this time it’s actually a real scary movie, right?
Wrong. 
The moment you rang Jay, you managed a sigh of relief once you heard a ringtone sounding from a distance away, so as anyone would, you followed it, turning around a corner and you saw Jay’s back, elation filled your heart, but before you could even shout his name, your perfect bubble burst.
Jay wasn’t alone, no, he was with someone, a girl. You squint your eyes and you swore your knees turned into jelly in that second. Sujin, the dumpster ex, pulled him into a kiss. A mix of countless emotions swelled in you, whether it was anger, shock or sadness, all you knew was that you needed to get out right now. You couldn’t believe it, Jay, the guy you actually considered was doing this. Maybe trusting him was the worst idea you could ever conjure up your entire life.
“Fuck me,” you cursed out, maybe a little too loudly because it definitely did make Jay stumble back from his ex, turning around to meet your eyes and you could tell he was not expected you here, hell you weren’t even expecting yourself to be in this foolish position.
“What—Y/N?” Jay somewhat looked too disoriented, unaware of what was happening as though he had just woken up 10 years later. But you couldn’t care less, you were hurt and you weren’t about to pretend nothing had happened and start acting jolly good. No, you weren’t going to stand there to let the scene before you swallow you whole, no way, you were going to leave this situation, this stupid event and this entire agreement. 
You stormed away, not daring to look back, mustering every bit of courage you had to swallow down a sob and remain prideful, even if it meant you had to fake it till you made it. Hurt wasn’t a stranger to you. You’ve experienced hurt in many forms. Physically, when you fell down on the rough rocky road; emotionally in terms of family, friends, love. But this was a hurt that resembled a deep cut, the feeling of being stabbed in the heart haunted your soul.
“Y/N, wait,”
Fuck, not here, not now, not when you were inside and standing in the middle of the room. Even though there was barely any one here by now, the guys from Jay’s hockey team remained, including Heeseung and Sunghoon, you were not ready to confront or be confronted.
“No, Jay, no ‘wait’,” you put your hand out, distancing yourself away from him, but you could still smell the alcohol in his breath. You wished and hoped he was sober enough for this, because in the next hour you were going to be the one drinking to death instead. 
“I can explain—”
“Can you?”
“What?”
“Can you explain this time? Is it just a drunken mistake? Is that what you were going to say?”
“For fuck’s sake, Y/N, we aren’t even dating,” 
Heads turned, you could sense people’s attention on the two of you now, but you were far from caring about that, not when Jay’s words felt exactly like a dig at your already fragile heart. God, you were so so stupid and naive.  
“Say it again,” the words came out in a whisper, your lips trembling. “Say it again, say how we were never real, how all of this was just a fucking scheme to get back at your ex, and ha—!” you threw your hands up, swallowing down a lump in your throat, “it worked, didn’t it? I ended up falling for your tricks and I ended up falling for you too, funny isn’t it?
Jay’s face twisted upon digesting your words, but you went on.
“I should’ve known that you were using me all along just to get back with her…” you faltered, your voice eventually failing you.
“Y/N, come on…” he said weakly, but you just shook your head.
 “Go back to her,”
“Don’t you get it? Fuck, I’d choose you over her, any day, any time. I’d choose you over everyone God damn it. Can’t you see that?” 
Your mouth fell open for a second, but nothing could come out as a response.
To say that you were bewildered was an understatement indeed, you were absolutely stunned speechless. The man before you, despite looking in a daze from God knows how much alcohol he had consumed, showed that his eyes said otherwise, staring back at you with desperation, longing, pining and sadness. Your heart could only take so much.
“Goodnight, Jay.”
What pained you more was the fact that he didn’t even try after that. No, he didn’t call for you nor did he stop you from leaving like those scenes from your favourite rom coms, he just decided to let you go. 
At one point, you really wished someone would come out and yell ‘this is a prank’ at you, but obviously, no one did. This whole thing was basically a reenactment of Cinderella, except it was a modern day and much more angsty version of every kid’s favourite movie. 
Of course, you happened to be Cinderella and he was Prince Charming, the clock struck midnight, you were leaving him in a haste and he was left stranded alone in the middle of a dance, how ironic. 
Oh, how you wished you were able to hide away from your own Prince Charming like the old mediaeval days.
Tumblr media
“ARE YOU GOING TO CONTINUE CRYING OVER ‘HOW TO LOSE A GUY IN 10 DAYS’?”
“Leave me alone,”
“It isn’t a good coping method,”
Somehow, it was already almost a week since that night. You remembered calling a cab in the dead of the night (dumb idea) and phoning Minji the whole way sobbing till the point where the driver had to pull over. You were pathetic and even a stranger could tell so, but you know what, he was nice about it and that’s the positives you’d take from that.
“And it’s ironic how I actually did somewhat lose a guy too,” you tried laughing, but it only sounded like a choke, Minji shaking her head sympathetically at you. 
Speaking about Minji, she definitely wasn’t pleased to hear what had happened. Knowing her, you knew she was about to say ‘I told you so’ but seeing you in your pathetic state, she kept her mouth zipped and quiet, letting you into her bed and having a sob session. It was a crazy night.
“When will you hear him out—did you even hear him out in the first place?” Minji eyed you accusingly and you began cowering under her intense gaze.
“No…”
“Y/N,” Minji sighed, shifting closer to you. “I know the whole picture is super messy and totally off putting, but what if it was an accident?”
“Him kissing his ex is a pretty clear picture to me, how would it be an accident?” you wrapped your blanket tighter around you, mumbling disheartedly.
“What if he fell on her or something?”
“Now you sound absolutely ridiculous,” you scoffed.
“What I really mean is, you should go and talk it out with him, if not, this thing will just drag on and you’ll hurt more,”
“I don’t think I’m ready, the wound’s still fresh,”
“I get it,” Minji placed her head on your shoulder, snuggling on your side. “It takes time, and I don’t think he’s ready either.”
Jay wasn’t ready, in fact he thinks he’s never going to face you again.
The moment he watched you slip away from him that night, he knew it was best to just let you go. Or so he thought. Best believe he got an earful from both Heeseung and Sunghoon, not to mention their dates. He could still remember the bursts of disbelief from them, the amount of ‘it was fake?’ and ‘what did you do?’ rung through his head till now, where he stared blankly back at the rink, sitting silently on one of the seats in the stands.
“It’s barely 24 hours and it’s also a Sunday, what are you doing here?” the team’s captain boomed through the empty arena, approaching Jay and eventually taking a seat next to him.
“Taking my mind off … things, what are you doing here?” Jay regarded Heeseung for a moment.
“I figured you’re here,” 
Jay nodded at Heeseung’s words, silence eventually filled the space between them. It was one of those moments where they knew something was wrong, but no one wanted to speak up about it.
“Are you not going to tell us what happened? Or did you simply decide to kiss your ex?” Heeseung broke the ice, coming off slightly harsh, detesting the silence from Jay. He knew this wasn’t the best friend he trusted his life with, the Jay he knew wasn’t a cheater, even if the relationship wasn’t real.
“Would you even believe me?”
“I would, I’ve known you for years, there’s no way you’re doubting my trust for you,” Heeseung rested his hand on Jay’s shoulder, giving him a reassuring squeeze.
Jay ran his hand across his face, blinking momentarily before sighing deeply. “I wasn’t the one who kissed her. I don’t know what happened to lead up to that, but I swear she suddenly turned me around and pressed herself onto me. I was just chilling outside for fresh air,”
“You’re kidding,”
“If I was I wouldn’t be here at all,”
“Have you confronted Sujin?” 
“Kind of? If you count screaming at her and telling Intak about it as a confrontation, then yes,” Jay was fidgeting with his fingers, his eyes trained on the rink. “I think Intak broke it off with her after,”
“Deserved,” Heeseung mused, a small smile on his face, karma truly worked wonders. “Now that’s settled, what about Y/N? I still can’t believe you roped her into a fake dating scheme just for that event,”
“Alright, alright, I’ve done some dumb shit and this was one of them, I know,” Jay admitted, throwing his hands up in defeat. “And I know I’ve hurt her … a lot, that’s why I don’t know how I can ever face her again,”
“I don’t understand why you didn’t chase after her that night,”
“I admit I did pussy out a little—”
“‘A little’?”
“Shut up,” Jay narrowed his eyes at his captain, who stared back, equally unamused. “I thought letting her go was the best choice, I was scared of hurting her more,”
Heeseung’s gaze softened, remaining quiet as he listened to his best friend opening up. Heeseung had these types of deep talk with Jay many times before, but this time, it was different. Being the one who stuck alongside Jay since his first breakup to now, he was the clearest when it came to Jay and his feelings. Over the years of witnessing Jay and his casual one nights, Heeseung expected it to last until the very day Jay retires from hockey, but your sole existence proved him wrong, and it definitely proved Jay wrong as well.
“Jay, do you like her?” Heeseung said after a while, catching the latter off guard.
“I–I–” Jay stammered, his body rigid and thoughts were circling in his mind. He didn’t just like you, he knows he’s fallen for you, you were the first girl to ever caught his eyes way before he even got to talk to you. 
He remembered it clearly, you were the one who called hockey stupid in front of his face, oblivious to the fact that he played the sport. He was injured at that time, sitting in the stands and watching his team play when he heard your voice complaining, your then boyfriend next to you. Offended Jay was once he heard the insult, though he was fascinated by you, but it was just his fuckboy side talking and he ended up staying silent instead.
Next thing he knew, he was all recovered and you were in the crowd, your face blank, the seat next to you was empty. Jay assumed it was a break up, something in him was giddy and he went on to score a hat trick that night. After all that, people might assume he would’ve gotten your number already, right? Nope. He never had the guts to and you stopped coming to games, only appearing once in a few months, until that fateful night at the beach.
“I do like her, fuck,” Jay threw his head back, leaning into the seat and his hands on his face, swallowing deeply as if he was in trouble, maybe because he was. How was he going to tell you he liked you and confront you about that night? There were two big stones thrown at his head. "I like her so much till the point where I think the amount of denial I had is turning into delusions instead,"
"So, you've reached insanity, got it," 
"God, I haven't been romantically in love with many girls before, but I'm pretty sure this is what being in love feels like, right … ?" 
Heeseung stared at Jay's pathetic expression, sighing deeply, clapping his back. "It's different for everyone but I can guarantee that you're on the right track, buddy,"
"Okay," Jay said breathlessly and nodded blankly, seeming as though he had just freshly figured out his feelings, putting the missing pieces into his puzzle. "Got it, but how do I apologise to her now?"
"What do you mean? Just go up to her and talk, say sorry and explain," 
"I feel like that's not enough,"
A sudden spark alighted in Heeseung's eyes, a shiver equally went down Jay's spine when he witnessed that before him. Lee Heeseung and his ideas were a mix of trouble and sometimes success, mainly trouble. “You know, Sunghoon pitched this idea to me yesterday, he said something about this is how you get the girl,”
The mention of Sunghoon's name and his idea didn't help at all.
“Write her an apology on our jumbotron,”
“You're insane,”
“And we happen to have access to it,”
“... tell me more.”
Tumblr media
YOU WERE REGRETTING YOUR CHOICE OF AGREEING TO HEESEUNG AND SUNGHOON’S INVITE.
Hockey games were never up your alley, they knew that, but somehow they still managed to pull you into attending their game, even after what had happened. They did offer to bring you out for a luxurious buffet and you guessed it was their way of an apology, not passing up on it either.
“This better be worth it,” you grumbled under your breath, settling into your seat, glancing down at the rink, making it a strenuous effort to not stare at him. Ladies, do not chase, attract. You were not about to go running after Jay, nope, never.
No matter how hard you tried suppressing the thought of Jay, it lingered nevertheless. You wondered when he would talk to you again, or if he ever would, and being the most stubborn person you were, you weren’t going to confront him despite the need of an explanation clawing at your deepest desires. 
The first and second period rolled by mindlessly and you were starting to be at your wits end, reminding you why you barely ever attend hockey games after your ex, but at least the home team was leading. The third period was slightly more thrilling thanks to the small fight between two players, enraging you and the crowd, but once the puck landed on Jay’s end of the stick, everyone was on their feet, watching him zoom past the defensemen.
Without saying, Jay scored the game’s winning goal, the crowd going wild. You couldn’t help smiling, the whole team engulfed him wholly, making you let out a small giggle, and you had to admit, times like this where teams win crucial games do make you happy. Meanwhile, what you hadn’t noticed was the fact that Jay was glancing up at the crowd, his eyes searching for your figure. 
On the other hand, what you did notice was the jumbotron. A video of Jay doing his celebration flashed big on the screen, a giant ‘GOAL’ next to his head, but there was another line of words under that caught your attention at once, knowing it was directed at you. ‘I’m sorry and I miss you. I’ll wait for you, even if it’s a lifetime. Please come back to me.’ Totally not heartbreaking and gut wrenching for you! 
Screw being a cold hearted girl boss, all you wanted was to run back to him. 
Slinging your bag onto your shoulder, your mind was in a mess as you made your way out, squeezing past people and mumbling apologies in return. You mentally made a list of things you were going to do. First, run back to the dorms. Second, cry. Third, figure shit out. Just to make matters messier, your journey out wasn’t the smoothest, especially when you had to bump into Jay’s dumpster ex. What great timing this was.
“Y/N?” Sujin was shocked to see you, but you were clearly unimpressed.
“You still have the guts to turn up in front of me? In here? In a school you don’t go to?”
“I–I just wanted to talk to you,” 
“Me? What’s there to say?” you crossed your arms, staring expectantly at her. 
“Look, Jay didn’t kiss me, I kissed Jay, you get it?” 
You blinked. Were you supposed to get it? As much as you wished you didn’t, you did, and your mind turned into a worse state of mush. God rest your soul, you were about to pull someone’s hair out.
“What?” you exclaimed incredulously, furiousness crawling into your system. “So, you’re telling me you basically threw yourself onto him?”
“I suppose?”
“Wow, you really are a freaky ex, not freaky in a good way either,” you gestured at Sujin, a sick feeling in your stomach. It was never Jay’s fault, but his dumpster ex, and maybe all along he was trying to explain his side, yet you didn’t listen. Now, you felt like an idiot and an asshole. “You can stay in the dumpster and never return. You’re sick and twisted and I hope you’ll never turn up and harass Jay ever again, you got it? Or else I’ll curse you into being single forever,”
“I—”
You didn’t let her finish, you couldn’t bother to do so, instead you turned away, speed walking towards the locker rooms that unknowingly became yours and Jay’s meeting spot. Heart beating quick, your feet stumbling from walking too fast, your breath heaving, you were getting anxious. By the time you were standing in front of the locker room, sweat was trickling down the side of your face, whether it was from pure anxiety or just walking, you didn’t know. All you knew was that you needed to talk to Jay.
“Y/N, what brings you here?” Heeseung had his hands in his pockets, headphones around his neck, looking fresh off the shower as he greeted you. “I know Sunghoon and I invited you for dinner but I don’t think it’s tonight—”
“Where’s Jay?”
“Jay?” Heeseung repeated, he didn’t seem like he was believing what he had heard. You resisted the urge to roll your eyes to the back of your head. 
“Are there other ‘Jay's' that you know?”
“Uh—no,” Heeseung stammered, shaking his head as if he’s trying to shake his dizziness away. “Jay left already, Y/N,”
“Oh,” it was obvious how deflated you became, the drop in your voice and disappointment written all over your face. Heeseung gave you an apologetic smile, but you could only manage a small wave of goodbye and a quiet bid of goodnight before turning back to the original path to the exit. 
To say you felt frustrated, embarrassed, sad was an understatement, those words would never amount to the real emotions you were feeling. You were a mess, your love life was in a big distress and practically crumbling apart. The walk home couldn’t be more depressing than usual, can’t it?
Taylor Swift playlists to sob to, a tub of strawberry ice cream, a random rom com were all going to be your biggest hug of the night.
Tumblr media
“GODS, THIS IS MISERABLE,”
A tub of half eaten ice cream sat sadly on your bedside table, a 90s romcom remained playing in the background. You couldn’t help frowning at the sight of the two leads falling in love, everything felt pathetic at this point.
You truly did stick to your words. Arriving back to an empty dorm room, courtesy to Minji for staying over at her boyfriend’s place, you practically had the whole dorm to yourself, meaning a space of free self loathing, you ran to your bed and plummeted into it. It took everything in you to not let out a blood curdling scream, instead you just took your laptop out and put on your favourite movie.
It was still early, midnight was barely approaching, so you were glad to be able to stay awake longer. It began raining heavily outside, a perfect sign for you to be in your sheets, reading your unfinished book that you’ve left hanging since months back. The whole scene of you being in bed on a rainy Friday night truly reflected a part from a romcom, how ironic it was.
In the midst of ‘16 Candles’ playing loudly on your laptop, the doorbell rang out of the blue. You froze, pausing the movie, slight paranoia creeping onto you. Right, being alone in an empty dorm room with a thunderstorm happening outside definitely wasn’t a common plot from horror. At first, you planned to ignore it, but a second ring prompted you to muster your courage to open the door.
‘I’m going to be fine’ chants were circling your mind as you approached the front door, one hand on the door knob, eyes glancing back and forth at the kitchen knife, you weren’t going down without a fight. A turn of the door knob and a pull of hand, the door swung open to a man. Wait. Not just any man—
“Jay?”
His name naturally rolled off your tongue, but your eyes couldn’t believe he’s actually standing right in front of you. 
Jay stared back, equally startled, as though he hadn’t expected you to open the door for him. He was standing there like a ghost, fully drenched from head to toe, shaking from the rain. His face was impassive, but his gaze showed otherwise, a hint of sadness and desperation painted in his brown irises.
“Are you insane?”
Jay glanced down at his attire that was basically soaked to the core, a small sigh escaping his lips. “We need to talk, Y/N,”
You nodded wordlessly, your eyes unknowingly avoiding his piercing gaze as you slowly backed away to the kitchen, grabbing a dry towel. “Here,” you handed Jay the towel, your hand shaking a little. 
“Thanks. Can I—” he took a peek over your shoulder, “—come in?”
“I—yeah,” you were slightly alarmed, moving to the side for him to enter before shutting the door, making sure to draw in a big breath to calm your nerves.
 “Y/N, please let me explain—”
“Jay, I’m really sorry—”
The two of you halted, realising that you’ve spoken in unison, the silence dawning on the both of you. Jay broke into an awkward smile and you felt yourself grinning just a little. Jay gestured at you to continue, so you did, letting out the things you’ve bottle in for days.
“I’m sorry, I didn’t know what happened and I just jumped to conclusions, which was wrong for me to do but—” you swallowed, blinking hard, “—but it was heart wrenching for me to see you kissing someone else, especially when it’s your ex, and it’s stupid, it’s so stupid that I’m feeling this way when we’re not even a thing!”
“It’s not stupid, Y/N,”
“It is,”
“It’s not,” Jay repeated, taking a step closer, a look of pining in his eyes as he searched for yours. You didn’t realise how much you’ve truly missed him until you saw him close. “I never intended to kiss Sujin, you know? I went out because she called me saying she needed help, and she took the chance when I was confused to kiss me. I know I’ve asked for you to trust me before, but if you don’t, I’ll get it,”
“I do,” you said at once, eliciting a small look of surprise from him. “I spoke to her,”
“What?”
“She admitted it to me, and I wanted to find you after the game but you were already gone, then I realised how much of an Idiot I was,” 
“Ah,” Jay said softly under his breath, combing his fingers through his hair, seemingly trying to digest everything in. The beat of silence was suffocating you gradually, uneasiness hung in the cold air of your dorm. It took you everything to pour the words you’ve been holding in your heart out.
“I trust you, I do, but what are we, Jay? What are we doing?” you breathed out, chewing anxiously on your bottom lip. “If you want to end it here, then say it—”
“We can be anything you want,”
“I want you, Jay,” you blurted out, it was too late to turn back and run now. “I don’t want you to need me, I want you to want me, just as much as I want you,”
Jay stepped closer, testing the waters between you and him before sensing the green light from you to continue further. Space was practically nonexistent, you were inches from him, letting his hand wander from your face to the back of your neck, naturally leaning into his warm touch that reminded you of the feeling of fire on a cold night. The hand resting on the back of your neck pulled you in closer, one wrong move and you would be kissing him. 
“I do want you,” Jay said quietly, the minty scent laced in his breath entering your senses. “I like you, Y/N. There’s no doubt about that, I know it. I’m aware that this whole thing started out fake and I expected nothing from it, but when I realised I felt something more for you, I was scared you would leave, especially since I had a history of—”
“Being a fuckboy?”
Jay rolled his eyes, grinning at the unamused look on your face. “That. So I thought letting you go after that night was a good decision, that my feelings would eventually disappear and you wouldn’t be hurt anymore, but God, I ended up hurting you instead and you have no idea how I had lost my mind,”
“Jay…” you were quite literally speechless, his words didn’t just had to tongue tied and had rendered you wordless completely, it made your insides twist and turn in the most childish way, it made you feel like you were a teenage girl who had just talked to her crush for the first time, you were giddy. 
“I choose you, my love. Any day, any time, anywhere. It’s always going to be you, only you,”
You were resisting the urge to break into the cheesiest smile ever, Park Jong Seong was about to be the death of you. “I like you too, big head. If you don’t kiss me now, I might change my mind,”
“You’re going to be the death of me,” 
Jay finally closed the space between you and him, pressing his lips on yours feverishly, your honey flavoured melting onto his lips and his cologne swarmed your senses, this was heaven. His hand travelled back to rest on your cheek, while yours was having a field trip travelling up his chest and into his hair, giving a slight tug which resulted in a groan from him. You tilted your head, feeling Jay part his lips and deepening the kiss, his other hand on your waist to pull you much more closer, your body now pressed up against his.
“Y/N,” he mumbled against your lips as you gently pushed him towards your couch. 
You hummed in response, feeling his body fall onto the couch with a thud and you followed suit, falling onto his lap, his arm wrapped tightly around your waist. You opened your eyes, pulling away to meet his heavy gaze that was staring back with equal desire.
“Be my girlfriend?” his voice came out in a whisper, but your ears perked up at those three words, a teasing grin pulled at your lips and your hand instinctively reached for his cheek to squeeze, earning a look of annoyance and endearment from him.
“Only if you take me out to dinner first, big head,”
“You’re such a tease,” he chuckled, pressing a haste kiss on the side of your lips and you giggled, brushing the strands of hair from his forehead.
“I’d be crazy to say ‘no’ after all this, you idiot,” you flicked at his forehead, eliciting a sharp hiss and a piercing glare from him, reminding you of a black cat. “So, yes, I’d like to be your girlfriend,”
You watched the man before you smiling wider than the time he won the championship with his team last season, his eyes shining bright and face beaming. Gosh, he was such a dream. One hand cupped your cheek, pinching it softly, “Don’t worry, I’ll treat you like my wife instead,”
You rolled your eyes at his words, deadpanning at him. “You’re too cheesy, Park Jong Seong,”
“And you love me for that.” he said in a sing-song tone before bringing you in for another kiss, this time softer and gentler, as if Jay was scared he would shatter you if he had kissed you too hard. 
If you had the choice to stay just like this for the next few hours, you would gladly take it. You were relieved everything was well now, even if it meant Jay's wet pants were staining your couch, but you're sure Minji would understand.
Just as Taylor Swift would say, you believe you were entering your 'Lover' era, and you couldn't wait to be with your hotheaded hockey boyfriend. Yes, boyfriend, with no space.
Tumblr media
“SO … YOU’RE TELLING ME YOU’VE ALWAYS BEEN INTO ME ALL ALONG?”
It has been a few months since you and Jay made it official together. To top off the unforgettable experience, Minji came home the next day to see you and him cuddling in bed, not missing the chance to get a picture and proceeding to give Jay a humble Ted Talk during breakfast, but it was all good after. 
Jay did stick to your request and bring you out for dinner, but Heeseung and Sunghoon unintentionally beat him to it first by dragging you to the buffet they promised before Jay’s fancy dinner night, and he was forced to follow begrudgingly. Breaking the news to Heeseung and Sunghoon was definitely an interesting occurrence, including the usual bro talk and the crazy ship names, but in the end, they were glad you were finally together with Jay and was miles prouder of Jay for finally working up the courage to confess. 
Now, here you were, on a Saturday night at Jay’s apartment enjoying a glass of wine, a random rom com in the background as promised of a marathon, and listening to your tipsy boyfriend spill about his first impression of you, which led to him unveiling the part where he laid eyes on you during the hockey game. 
“Not always, don’t get ahead of yourself,” Jay cut you off, raising an eyebrow at you. "I still can't believe you called hockey stupid,"
"It was a moment of hatred, okay?" You tapped his chin, swirling the wine glass in your hand. "Now, I'm a big hockey fan,"
"You're stupid," 
You feigned a dramatic gasp, punching his shoulder softly. "You're stupid … stupid,"
"Yes, yes, I am," Jay eventually gave in, closing in and pressing his lips onto yours, tasting the familiar taste of the red wine on your tongue. "I'm so grateful to have you with me, lovely. What would I be doing without you?"
"Fucking other girls?"
"You've ruined the mood,"
You laughed, pressing a kiss on his cheek. "I'm kidding. You would be in a ditch without me,"
"You're not wrong," Jay's thumb was grazing against your lip, his eyes half-lidded, the alcohol in his system overpowering. "God, I love you,"
"I love you more, big head," you said, feeling a swarm of butterflies fluttering wildly in your abdomen. Jay was perfect, too perfect that it intimidated you, but what you didn't know was that he felt the same way about you too. "Are you turning red, Jong Seong?"
"What? Pft, it's the wine," he waved your words off, turning away to hide the obvious that he was becoming a shade of pink and maroon. You snorted at his ridiculousness, pushing his face to face back at you.
"Kiss me again?"
"You make me such a happy man, you know that?" Jay grinned, saying nothing more and pulled you in, abandoning his wine glass.
Jay couldn’t help but smile against your lips, being the happiest man in the entire universe at this moment, because he knew he finally got the girl, his girl, and there was no way he would ever lose you again. Never.
4K notes · View notes
gunnerfc · 20 days
Text
Consequences | Katie McCabe x Arsenal!Reader (18+)
Summary: Katie overhears you claiming to be the more dominant one in the bedroom and has to put you in your place
Warnings: semi-public sex (not the whole fic), edging, fingering (r receiving), teasing from Katie, strap use (r receiving), Katie calling r “good girl” and “slut”, strap sucking
WC: 2.7K
AN: posting this a bit later than I originally planned </3 
You were sat at a table in a loud pub with Steph, Lia, and Beth laughing at some of your teammates butcher a Taylor Swift song in a round of karaoke. Arsenal had just won the Conti Cup final and everyone decided that getting drinks and celebrating together was the best thing to do. You giggled to yourself watching Katie forget all the lyrics when it was her turn to sing, knowing it was definitely the alcohol she had consumed. 
Lia’s eye caught the love in your eyes as you stared at your girlfriend with a bright smile. “You and Katie are really cute! It’s sweet seeing how different she is off the pitch with you,” the midfielder all but shouted over the loud music. You tore your eyes from the group at the front of the room, Steph and Beth offering words of agreement with Lia.
You weren’t sure if it was the alcohol coursing through your veins, but you felt like being a bit messy. Perhaps scoring the winning goal was affecting you more than you thought. “Please, Katie is nothing like how she is on the pitch, you’d be surprised at what I could get her to do,” you smirked, throwing your teammates a teasing wink as you took a sip of your drink.
“That’s a bit surprising, you don’t have a commanding bone in your body, babe,” Beth laughed as she sipped her drink. You gasped dramatically at her words, earning a laugh from Steph and Lia as well. 
“Yeah, Y/N/N, you won’t even argue with a ref when you have the right to,” the Aussie added more insult to injury. You knew they were right, and you definitely knew Katie was the dominant one in your relationship, but hearing how your friends didn’t think you could be made you eager to continue the lie.
“I’ll have you three know that Katie is not the same person at home,” you huffed. While trying to convince your friends about something you knew to be untrue, you failed to realize your teammates who were doing karaoke had made their way back to the table. Others were still at the bar, chatting among themselves where they could actually hear each other.
None of you noticed the sly smirk on Katie’s face as she overheard your conversation. She found it entertaining that you thought you could be in charge in the bedroom, and it was even more comical that your teammates didn’t really believe you. 
“You good, babe,” Katie said as she took her seat next to you, a teasing glint in her eye when you jerked your head toward her. 
“Hi, baby! You sounded so good up there,” you knew she heard you just by the way she was looking at you and you knew she wouldn’t let you live it down. Katie laughed at your praises, you were in for it when the two of you got home. Though, a part of Katie wanted to tease you about your comments now, rather than wait. 
Katie waited until your teammates were distracted with new conversations before she leaned closer to whisper in your ear. “Meet me in the bathroom in a minute, love,” her accent laced with command, knowing you would listen. You nodded your head subtly as she stood from the table and headed towards the bathrooms. 
You let your teammates return to their conversations so they wouldn’t notice you were leaving the table as well. Your breathing picked up as you walked towards the bathroom, your heart was breathing against your chest as desire filled your body. You didn’t think Katie was going to be nice enough to give an orgasm so soon, but who were you to complain about your girlfriend making you cum.
The bathrooms were empty aside from the Ireland captain leaning against one of the stalls. The stall wasn’t the best size to do anything but seeing Katie’s smirk with a slight head tilt as she pushed the door in some, you didn’t care how small it was. You quickly entered the small cubicle, Katie joining you as she locked the stall, not that it really mattered. 
Before you could even plead your case, your girlfriend’s lips were on yours in a heated kiss. Your mouth moved against hers, Katie easily gaining dominance over you. You were grateful her lips were on yours as a loud moan threatened to escape your mouth. Katie’s hands held your waist tightly as she pushed you against the side of the stall. Your hands moved to wrap around her shoulders as your hips started rolling against her.
Katie pulled back when she felt your hips moving, her hands pushing you further against the siding to stop their movements. “What do you think you're doing, love,” she asked, fake confusion gracing her features. 
“Please, Katie! I’m sorry for lying to them, please just do something,” you whined lowly, hoping she would decide to be a bit nicer tonight. Katie laughed softly at your words, this was just the beginning for her. 
“Since you asked nicely,” she smirked as she moved one of her hands to the buttons on your jeans, easily undoing them without a second thought. Your heart was thumping against your chest in anticipation, waiting for her fingers to reach where you needed her most. 
You tilted your head back against the siding of the stall as Katie traced a finger over the top of your underwear leaving a blazing trail against your cool skin. You tried to jerk your hips forward but her hand that remained on your waist kept you from doing so. Just as you were about to beg again, Katie’s hand dipped under the waistband and ran up and down your dripping core.
The defender didn’t give you a warning before two of her fingers pushed into you. You had to control your volume as she moved her hand, thrusting lightly into you. Katie set a slow pace as she worked her fingers inside you and leaned forward to attach her lips to your exposed neck. One of your hands moved to tangle in her hair as she sucked harsh bruise-like marks along the side and column of your neck.
“Do ya enjoy this, you lyin’ slut,” she mumbled against your skin as kissed up toward your jaw. Your eyes rolled back at her words mixed with the agonizingly slow thrust of her fingers. You knew she wasn’t looking for an answer, she just wanted you to know your place. 
Begging for her to go fast would get you nowhere, knowing Katie she would stop altogether if you asked for more. Through heavy breaths and low moans, you focused on how close you were to coming. Katie could sense you were close, she’d given you enough orgasms to know how to read your body for signs. But she wasn’t going to let you off the hook that easy.
Just as you were about to cum, Katie pulled her fingers out of your tight cunt. You cried out at the loss of contact just as you were about to let go but Katie paid you mind as she redid the buttons on your jeans. As you opened your mouth to complain, her fingers that were previously inside you were shoved in your mouth. She didn’t have to tell you what to do as you sucked her fingers clean, moaning at the taste of yourself on them.
“Since you’re in a lying mood tonight, love, go tell the girls you don’t feel well and we’re gonna head home,” Katie ordered with a menacing smirk on her face as she pulled her fingers from your mouth. 
You didn’t speak, only nodding your head obediently. The quicker you could leave, the quicker you could get home and Katie would let you cum. Katie let go of your waist and moved so you could exit the stall first. You made your way back to the table a bit uncomfortably, you were beyond dripping and it was driving you crazy.
“Hey guys, I think we are gonna head out, I’m not feeling too good,” you spoke over the loud music, hoping you were convincing the team. A few of them made an ‘aw’ sound while others wished you well. Katie quickly waved goodbye to the team as you joined her at the entrance. You were in for a long car ride full of even more teasing.
When you reached Katie’s car she quickly opened the door for you, giving you a big grin when you got in the car. A minute later the two of you were off, heading back to your shared apartment. Katie had one hand on the steering wheel and the other held tightly to your thigh, squeezing it every so often.
“It’s not nice to lie to your friends, y’know,” the defender spoke, not even sparing you a glance. You took a deep breath as you prepared yourself for the remarks she was going to make.
“Not gonna respond, are we, love,” she chuckled as she stopped at a red light. Katie turned her head in your direction, watching your chest heave and your thighs attempting to rub against each other. She tightened her grip on your thigh, stopping you from succeeding in finding a bit of relief.
“I could,” you mumbled softly, “be in charge,” you finished with a deep breath. The lack of contact where you needed it most was getting to you and you weren’t sure how long you could last whenever Katie decided to finally give in.
Katie laughed sarcastically at your words as the light turned green and she took off. “You heard Steph if you can’t argue with a ref when you should, what makes you think you’d be able to boss me around,” the Ireland captain taunted with a grin.
You knew she was right but a small part of you believed that you could if you were given the chance. Though tonight would not be that night. The rest of the car was silent, Katie’s hand stayed on your thigh and you felt yourself growing wetter by the second.
You said a silent thank you when you pulled up to your apartment building, thankful that you were a bit closer to an orgasm. You and Katie rode the elevator in silence, both of you going over what was about to happen when you got inside your apartment. 
Katie quickly unlocked the door and you were pulled inside at lightning speed. Your back met the door roughly once it was closed and Katie’s lips were on yours once again. She easily won control of the kiss, you were too desperate to fight her. You let your girlfriend guide you through the apartment, her lips never leaving yours. 
When you reached the bedroom is when you were given the chance to breathe again. Katie pulled back from you before she all but shoved you toward the bed. “Be a good girl and strip,” her strong voice echoed around the room and she didn’t bother to watch as she moved toward the nightstand to get the girthy strap she liked to use when she deemed you to be ‘bad,’ 
You quickly got out of your clothes, tossing them wherever you could. You stood at the foot of the bed, naked and ready for the next order from the defender. Katie took her time taking off her own clothes and getting the toy situated around her hips. When she was done, she joined you at the foot of the bed while her eyes took in your naked form.
“Knees,” was all she ordered and you dropped to the carpeted floor. Katie held the toy near the end, holding it up toward your mouth and without needing further instruction, you took the toy into your mouth. 
You hollowed your cheeks as you sucked, taking the toy as far as you could before you started gagging. Katie had her hands in your hair while she rocked her hips forward, helping the toy go further down your throat. You were dripping down your thighs, and having Katie fuck your throat was affecting you greatly.
After a few minutes, Katie let go of your hair as she pulled the toy from your mouth. A string of saliva connecting your lips to the toy drew a deep groan from the woman standing above you. You waited on your knees for your girlfriend to tell you what to do before she motioned to the end of the bed.
You moved off the floor quickly as you lay on the bed, letting your legs dangle off the end. Katie used her foot to kick your legs open and you moaned lowly at the cool feeling on your wet cunt. Katie moved in between your legs and pulled them up to wrap around her waist. 
The defender ran the tip of the toy through your folds, teasingly pushing it in a little bit. You whined at the feeling, it wasn’t enough and if something didn’t happen soon you were going to cum around nothing. Katie lined the toy up with your cunt before she pushed it in, using her hips to push it further into you. Her hands held your hips tightly and she didn’t waste any time before her hips snapped against yours.
Your hands held the top cover in a tight grip, your knuckles turning white as loud moans spilled from your lips. Katie’s movements didn’t start slow, she immediately started pounding into you quickly. “Good girls don’t lie, bad sluts do. Are you a bad slut,” your girlfriend questioned as her skin hit yours.
You couldn’t formulate a sentence, high-pitched moans were too busy escaping your mouth. Katie squeezed your hips as she angled her hips slightly to hit that familiar spot inside you. A loud gasp echoed off the walls at the feeling, if she kept hitting that spot you were going to be coming soon. 
“I-I’m sorry! I’ll be a good girl! P-please let me cum,” you croaked out in between moans, tears falling down the sides of your face. 
“I don’t think you deserve to cum,” Katie said as she moved one of her hands to push down on your lower stomach. Your moans turned to cries as you felt an orgasm about to wash over you. 
“P-please, Katie! Let me cum,” you cried out as the familiar coil in your stomach started to break. You tried to hang on as long as possible, knowing if you came without permission, you were going to get punished for it.
Katie’s movements sped up as she pushed down on your stomach and held on tightly to your hip. She kept a steady pace as the sound of her skin slapping against yours and the wet sounds of your dripping cunt filled the room. Katie wanted to make you suffer for lying to your friends but the sight of you fucked out and coming was something she couldn’t pass up.
“Be a good girl and cum for me,” the defender growled, eyes locked on your face watching your expression as you let go.
Your orgasm sent shockwaves through you as your back arched off the bed and your head was thrown back. You came all over the toy attached to Katie’s hips but that didn’t stop her movements. She kept her pace the same as was determined to pull another orgasm from you. 
You cried at the overstimulation but the cries quickly turned to moans at the feeling of being full. Your second orgasm of the night hit you quickly, cum dripping down both your and Katie’s thighs. Katie slowed her movements, letting you calm down for a minute before pulling out of you completely and unwrapping your legs from her body. 
“Move up the bed and roll over, baby. We aren’t through yet,” Katie huffed out, she was going to show you just how wrong you were. 
You took a second to catch your breath before following her orders. You knew it was silly to lie to your friends over something like this but if it meant having Katie treat you like and having multiple earth-shattering orgasms back to back, then you couldn’t be too upset that she overheard you. You had a long night and felt every bit of it the next morning, but you were far from complaining about being sore.
426 notes · View notes
reiniesainyo · 1 month
Text
IN BETWEEN. charlie bushnell x reader – 01
01 | SPARKS FLY previous | next | masterfile
SYNPOSIS. when a girl's co-star is good to her and now she wants it more than everything in between. (smau)
A/N. this chapter is more like world building (it's where i explain what the fuck i'm doing with the YN okay)
Tumblr media
The "Percy Jackson and the Olympians" series at Disney+ has added an unexpected pick to its growing cast.
The new live-action series is based on the hugely successful novels from author Rick Riordan of the same title. We will be seeing YN LN join the series as Rina Velasco, one of the supporting characters of the show.
LN's Rina Velasco is referred to as "the offspring of The Muses, goddesses of the sciences and the arts." Unlike most other demigods, she is born out of the artistic and scientific output of the muses. When the moral ingenuity of humans meets the divine musings of The Muses. Her character is described as a unique allrounder who becomes a mentor figure to our main cast as they embark on their journey.
This will be LN's first on-screen role of her career. LN's experience mostly lies in Broadway, she is known for playing Kim in the Miss Saigon revival on Broadway. LN was nominated for a Tony in 2022 for the same role. She is repped by Salonga/Chien Entertainment and B817 Agency.
Riordan posted on the Meta app, Threads, about this update to the casting saying: "YN was one of the actors we didn't expect to see a tape of but when we saw it, we couldn't help but fall in love with her. She embodies the spirit of Rina so well and is such a kind spirit, we can't wait for you to fall in love with her too! Welcome to the cast, YN!"
The live-action show is based on Rick Riordan's Percy Jackson book series. It tells the fantastical tale of the titular 12-year-old modern demigod (Scobell), who's just coming to terms with his newfound supernatural powers when the sky god Zeus accuses him of stealing his master lightning bolt. With help from his friends Grover (Simhadri) and Annabeth (Jeffries), Percy must embark on an adventure of a lifetime to find it and restore order to Olympus.
Production on the show is now underway in Vancouver. Riordan and Jon Steinberg are writing the pilot with James Bobin directing. Steinberg and his producing partner Dan Shotz are overseeing the series and serve as executive producers alongside Bobin, Rick Riordan, Rebecca Riordan, Bert Salke, Monica Owusu-Breen, Jim Rowe, Anders Engström, Jet Wilkinson, and Gotham Group's Ellen Goldsmith-Vein, Jeremy Bell, and D.J. Goldberg. 20th Television is the studio. Salke was formerly the president of Touchstone Television and originally put the show into development.
Tumblr media
liked by percyseries, iamcharliebushnell, and 37,789 others thelnarchive the child of the muses @percyseries
percyseries OUR MUSE!
user1 this is literally perfect casting who cried i did ↳ user2 she's so rina coded! thank the gods for the casting directors
iamcharliebushnell only muse in my life ↳ thlnarchive only traveler in my life ↳ user3 the way filming hasn't started and they're already like this ↳ user4 their chemistry is chemistry-ing
user5 roman empire. she is my roman empire.
dior.n.goodjohn i LOVE LOVE LOVE women ↳ thelnarchive HELP i love you
user6 this is so fcking random but i NEED her in a taylor swift music video
A/N i truly hope you guys can forgive the horrible editing in the pictures. the article portion is based on (and has some parts that are directly pulled from) this article from variety ! here's some succint information about rina velasco, the PJO character YN LN plays (and is my childhood OC!) - rina velasco, filipino, 18 years old (year younger than luke) - she's an offspring of the muses, not directly a child or daughter, though she may be referred as such - by her being an offspring of the muses, i mean that she was born in the same way athena's children are born. - but in rina's case she's more like a weird conglomeration of each muse. her birth is a rare event, but her mothers are honored as minor goddesses so she stayed in the apollo cabin (connection to music) - rina operates as a guidance figure for the main trio, especially annabeth - she's also luke's love interest, there's a lot of tragicness and doomed romance stuff with those two - and for the sake of everyone, we pretend like the weird i love you from the books didn't happen !
237 notes · View notes
jinnie-ret · 6 months
Text
destined at the VMAs
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
stray kids x musician!reader (platonic)
genre: fluff
content warnings: none.
word count: 1.7k
summary: a musician under the name CLOVER is starstruck when she meets her favourite group Stray Kids at the VMAs, only to find that they're big fans of her too
This imagine is written in first person under the name of an artist called CLOVER.
As voted for by you! Make sure follow to have a say in regular polls for what I'll post next!
Or if you have any ideas you want to see them you can send in asks!
Hope you enjoy!
MAIN MASTERLIST
Tumblr media
"Okay guys, I'm really excited right now because we have the one and only CLOVER, all the way from the UK and making her debut American television appearance here at the VMAs!" an interviewer for Entertainment Tonight introduced me to the camera whilst other celebrities arrived and walked the pink carpet.
"Hi!" I greeted her politely and waved at the camera. I felt so excited to be here at the VMAs, my first time in America and it was on such a well known awards show, I couldn't believe it. I hoped my fans liked my bold type of outfit too, a beautiful black gown with a daring slit up the side where it rested against my thigh.
"Welcome to the US, CLOVER! We're so happy to have you here, how are you finding it?" the interviewer asked me, holding the mic out.
"It's big. America is so much bigger than I expected it to be, especially compared to back home," I said with wide eyes, wearing a shocked expression on face which made the woman opposite me laugh.
"That's right, you've come all the way over here from England, right? How excited are you to perform here?" she asked me.
"I'm incredibly nervous, if I'm honest haha. There's so much talent here so I just hope that people will enjoy what I bring too," I smile, wiping my hands down on my dress awkwardly. I really hoped the camera didn't somehow pick up the sight of my sweaty palms.
"Well I've seen some of your performances before and let me just say, I'm a big fan myself!" she confessed, which made me heart feel warm.
"Wow thank you so much!" I blushed, hands clasped together now. I really couldn't stop fidgeting with them.
"I mean, you've been nominated for best new artist! That must feel amazing right?" she smiled at me.
"It really does, to be nominated for an award, let alone perform here is just beyond my imagination. Like Ice Spice, Peso Pluma, Pink Pantheress my UK sister is nominated too! It's crazy!" I exclaim, hoping I'd meet my fellow UK artist too, not realising that later on I'd meet a different honorary British artist.
"Speaking of, is there anyone else you're excited to see here today?" the interviewer leaned towards me, like she was ready for any gossip.
"Wow, pretty much everyone!" I laughed, "but I'd have to say Demi for sure! I'm excited to see them perform I've loved their music for years! Also Maneskin and there's Stray Kids and TXT too! I'm so excited for Stray Kids oh my god..." I ramble, waving my hands in the air as I talk excitedly, unable to hide my big smile.
"Stray Kids certainly seem to be stealing everyone's hearts this year, I spoke to them earlier, and... wow," the interviewer laughed with me, and it felt like having a conversation with a friend at that point.
"I don't blame you haha," I giggled.
"Well, thank you so much for chatting with us, CLOVER, we'll see you out there later tonight, best of luck!" she smiled at me before turning to the camera and ending the interview. I waved bye to her and the camera and walked round the corner, heading backstage with my manager and taking a deep breath in.
It all felt so surreal, I was sure I caught a glance of Taylor Swift and waved and smiled at her, shocked to have gotten the same actions returned and squealed, unable to help myself as I jumped around and bumped into someone behind me.
"I'm so sorry!"
"Oh my god sorry!"
We both apologised at the same time. And when I turned around to see who it was I thought I was going to spontaneously combust right there and then.
It was Felix of Stray Kids.
"Felix?!"
"CLOVER?!"
What. The. He knew who I was?
"Oh, you know Stray Kids?" he asked me shocked, an adorable expression on his face as he helped me rebalance myself, I was wearing heels after all.
"I should be asking you the same question, I've been listening to you guys for years!" I gushed, probably embarrassing myself a bit but Felix didn't seem to react to that, seeming to get excited himself.
"You have? Wow... Stray Kids are such huge fans of your music, we really love your songs," Felix happily explained to me, still holding onto my hands as he waved them excitedly.
"No way... that's insane!" I couldn't put everything I was thinking into words.
"Tell me about it," he laughed, pulling his hands away to scratch the back of his neck.
"Felix!" the other members walked over, not noticing me at first, which was lucky otherwise they would have seen me looking at them like they were ghosts.
"We've been looking everywhere for you!" Bang Chan patted his shoulders, speaking in Korean and then turned to see me, a shocked expression painting his face.
"Sorry I didn't mean to be keeping Felix," I then spoke back in Korean, some of the members seeming to jump back in shock at hearing their native language.
"Woah, CLOVER?! Wait, you speak Korean?!" Han bounced on his feet, beaming at me.
"Yeah my best friend is Korean so I ended up learning it, definitely helped when watching you guys. This is just like a dream, I can't tell you how amazing it is to meet you guys!" I felt myself getting almost hyper by seeing them in front of me.
"We could say the same to you! We're all big fans of you!" Changbin stepped up, whilst some of the other members stood back nervously.
"If I'm being honest I didn't believe Felix when he told me that," I shook my head in disbelief.
"Well believe it now," Seungmin laughed, seeming to feel more comfortable now.
"I'm so hyped to see you guys perform tonight! How are you feeling?" I asked them, feeling more confident now as the ice had been broken.
"I think we're nervous but we're going to do our best out there," Lee Know shyly admitted.
"We could do with some words of encouragement, could you say Stray Kids hwaiting?" Han asked cheekily.
"Han we've just met her, don't scare her away," Hyunjin did his iconic laugh.
"It's fine, it's fine haha. Stray Kids hwaiting!!!" I cheered for them and they all clapped for me after, making me blush and hide my face.
"Your Korean is really good," Jeongin commented.
"Thank you, well, like I said, it's all thanks to my friend. She's so cute, she'd cheer me on before every gig I used to do like, CLOVER hwaiting!!" I share, hoping they wouldn't find it weird how I'm rambling on.
"Hahaha, that's cute, is she a stay too?" Bang Chan asked hopefully.
"Oh, big time! She's the reason I got to know your music and watch your variety stuff too," I nod back at him. They all let out sounds of amazement.
"You watch our other stuff?" Changbin asked shocked.
"Yeah! I'm a big fan of SKZ Code!" I admit sheepishly.
"Wow that's a good friend you got there," Seungmin nods, smirking.
"She's the best, she's supported me through my music the whole time," I grin, thinking about my best friend. I wish she could have come to America with me but she was too busy.
"Are you planning on releasing any new music soon?" Felix asks me.
"Well, I'll let you in on a secret, I'm working on some right now!" I fake whisper to them, but it didn't really matter. I was speaking to them in Korean at this point so it wasn't very likely anyone backstage would expose the fact.
"You are? Wow I'm looking forward to it already, you have such a unique sound," Han praises my music, making me a hold a hand over my heart.
"Wow that honestly means a lot coming from you guys. You have such a unique sound too and it inspired me to go with the direction I really wanted to in my music," I compliment them, seeing their eyes light up.
"Thank you! Have you ever thought of collabing with another artist?" Changbin asks, seeming to be hinting at something as Minho pats his shoulder warningly.
"Well, now that you've brought it up, I've always wanted to make some songs with you guys," I confess shyly, blushing even more when they all ask 'really'?!
"That would be amazing, I think we could create something great together," Bang Chan nods, a more professional tone as he thinks about their music.
"Perfect! Well I have to go now, but I could get our managers to exchange numbers?" I say, realising I should be getting ready to find my seat.
"We'd love that!" Felix claps his hands together happily.
"Great! Well it was lovely to meet you guys!" I wave as I start to walk away, before I turn snack around quickly and call over to them, "oh, by the way Han, thanks for representing us British Stays, your accent is the best," I daringly tease, giggling to myself as I walk away.
I felt like I was on cloud nine. I met my favourite people in the world... and we were going to try and collab together. It really doesn't get better than this.
Except it does.
For my performance I had changed into a beautiful green dress to match the nature filled scene behind me, performing one of my songs called 'Salvia'. It was a reassuring song to comfort a partner, before the scene behind me started showing dying flowers as I transitioned into a song called 'Rotten to the Core', the pure opposite of the first song. As I ended the performance I saw Stray Kids up and applauding for me, and I smiled and nodded in their direction.
Then I saw them perform too. And the remix they did blew my mind. I was so happy they were getting recognition from other artists too, who may not have seen them before. And I returned my admiration for their performance as I gave a standing ovation of my own, seeing them look my way too.
It all felt like a dream. The future was really looking up, especially with a collaboration with my favourite people in the midst of it all.
629 notes · View notes
medellintangerine · 3 months
Text
If We Make It Through December
2023 Secret Santa Fic for @tieronecrush
Tumblr media
Summary: Having moved back to your Texan hometown after a break-up, a Christmas party at your friends’ house brings Javi Peña, your first love thought long-lost, back into your life...
Word Count: 5.6 k
Dedicated playlist of songs that have inspired this fic here. 
Dividers by @saradika
Roughly takes place around the end of Season 2 of Narcos. 
A/N: My little Christmas postcard to @tieronecrush as part of the @pedrostories Secret Santa event. Thank you for organising this beautiful event and to @pedrorascal for your reminders and guidance throughout ❤️💚
I have truly, and entirely self-indulgently, gone overboard with the Phoebe Bridgers/Taylor Swift references here. I feel so lucky to have written in honor of the amazing creator of ‘Seven Minutes in Heaven’ Frankie, and for somebody who has such a similar taste (including our love for Javi P!). 
Not beta’d- I did not have as much time as I would have liked on this due to life being crazy prior to the holidays. But it got me started with my writing again, which has just been a great bonus, as Christmas this year brings a few issues for me, too. I would usually like to edit a fic like this a bit more, but it really shows my love for some slow burning, mutual pining dialogue. I hope this does @tieronecrush justice, which would be a huge Christmas gift to me. Thank you for your beautiful work Sam, hope this season treats you well - Merry Christmas!
Warnings: Javier Pena x F!Reader; Angst/Fluff/Smut/Drunken confessions and mutual pining/Lovers to Ex-Lovers to Lovers again/Emotional Hurt and Comfort/Subtle references to reader’s toxic previous relationship/alcohol consumption - reader thinks Javi is drinking a little too much wine to deal with issues/unprotected PiV(don’t do as I write)/some dirty talk - I will have forgotten some warning, please feel free to let me know!
Tumblr media
‘Come and join us, darlin’ - no good hiding back here all night’.
Brendan, your best friend’s husband, smiles at you softly as he clinks his beer bottle against your glass. Phoebe had insisted you try one of her ‘seasonal cocktails’, a sickly-sweet concoction of chambord and gingerbread syrup that is hiding the decent scotch you can detect in there somewhere. 
‘Yes, yes, just taking a quick breather’ you reply, hoping your smile reaches your eyes. Brendan smirks at you but doesn’t push the issue further. 
You grab some ice from the freezer, hoping it will dilute the drink somewhat, and move to the other side of the kitchen, leaning against the counter to will yourself to be sociable. The claustrophobic feeling that has been haunting you since returning to your hometown of Kingsville, Texas creeps up and wraps itself around your upper body. You force yourself to count the twinkling fairy lights on the Christmas tree in Brendan and Phoebe’s living room, swallowing down the pangs of envy at the scene of their happy domesticity. Only six weeks ago you had hoped that maybe the prospect of Christmas would bring some peace between you and Josh - telling yourself ‘if we make it through December, we’ll be fine’ over and over again like a mantra. 
But only two weeks later you had resigned to things being beyond what you could handle, and packed what you could of your belongings into your small car and made the drive back home to Texas, taking your mother’s friend up on the offer of a small apartment she was renting out. No more picket fence. But some calm at last. 
You sip on your drink and take a deep breath, about to join the crowd, when you see Brendan turn away from the small group of people he had been entertaining to grab a bottle of wine from Phoebe as she passes him. The motion allows a glimpse of who had been facing him and your breath hitches in your throat and your face heats up. Your hand finds the counter behind you as you will your features not to display the shock of spotting the one face you did not expect to see here. A face that was once the most familiar, most comforting sight to you until you slipped away from its sleeping features one winter morning, hoping to remember it like that forever. 
Javier Peña. 
You take in Javi and find a chuckle bubbling up your throat. He’s still sporting a moustache, the same checked shirt and tight jeans. Fashion had clearly passed him by. You guess that he most likely doesn’t care. His cowboy boots look recently cleaned - if he’s visiting home you just know his dad will have put him to work on the ranch immediately, so he clearly had gone to some effort tonight. You catch yourself checking out his hands for a wedding ring, and can’t quite process the fluttering in your stomach when you see there is none. 
Your pulse starts to race as you observe his broad shoulders, emphasized by the way his shirt stretches over his upper body. You suddenly remember vividly how it felt to rest the back of your head against those same shoulders as he held your back against his front  - at the cheap hotel as you watched your mutual friends dancing on the night of your high school graduation, in one of the bars downtown during the first year of college as you tipsily swayed to terrible Country music, or atop Bobby, Javi’s favorite horse as he guided the brown stallion down obscure paths just on the perimeter of his dad’s ranch.  
As the heat rises up your chest, which you doubt is caused by the alcohol, you see the expression on Javi’s face and feel like there’s an invisible string connecting you to him. He smiles along to Brendan’s jokes and nods at the other men politely when they speak, but his eyes mostly seem to study the floor and the vacant look on his face is unlike anything you’ve ever seen before. Brendan refills his glass and as Javi immediately downs almost half of it with a smirk, you suddenly realize how strange it is for you to see him with a wine glass in his hand. It was always whiskey for him. 
The knot in your stomach is still there, though you now feel a strange sense of serious concern for Javi. Something is up, you just know it, and you can tell he’d rather be anywhere else than at this Christmas party right now.
Hoping to be inconspicuous from where you have hidden yourself in the little alcove of the kitchen, you try to match up the figure in the room across from you with the snippets of stories you had heard over the years - of the local boy who had not only gotten into the DEA, but was actually at the forefront of fighting narco crime in Colombia, of all places. 
However, the man before you did not look like the eternal homecoming king you thought he’d always be, and as he empties the wine glass that looks way too delicate in his hands, you have become convinced something is deeply unsettling Javi and suddenly it feels like somebody has simply pressed rewind on the last couple of years and you yearn to speak to him. 
It might be dutch courage, but you find yourself checking your appearance in the toaster, smoothing out the sparkly dress you had grabbed at the last minute this morning to appear at least somewhat in a festive spirit. You grab the bottle of Scotch Phoebe had so perversely used in the cocktail, and know exactly where the tumblers are kept. Armed with your props you take one last deep breath and head out of the kitchen. 
You keep your eyes on Brendan as you stride over to his group, sliding up next to him. 
‘There she is! Decided to grace us with your presence, your highness?’ Brendan slurs slightly as he elbows you jovially. You smile at him. You’ve always felt safe and respected around him ever since Phoebe had introduced the two of you when they came over to L.A. at your last place. You were genuinely pleased she had found somebody so kind and solid, even though you couldn’t deny the sting of envy as you prayed for just morsels of the same affection from Josh. 
‘Yeah, yeah - thank you’ you reply sarcastically,, trying to keep your cool as you roll your eyes at the other three men.
Javi looks like he has been frozen to the spot. When your eyes meet, his deep brown irises bore into you, and you worry you might drop the fancy glasses you had grabbed on your way over, so quickly turn towards Brendan again. 
‘Actually, I was trying to rescue this fine bottle from another one of your wife’s mixology attempts if any of you fancy a sip?’ You try to sound cordial, but the fact that only Javi has finished his wine has not escaped you. 
‘Oh, um, think we’re on the vino for now, darlin’. Maybe later?’
You decide to go for it and turn your body towards Javi. 
‘What do you say, Javi? One for old times’ sake?’
Javi is still gawping at you in utter confusion. Luckily, Brendan is there again to iron out the awkwardness. 
‘Oh you guys know each other? Well, I guess that’s not surprising in this ltown’
‘Yeah, from as far back as high school actually.’ you respond, remembering that Brendan was actually not a local kid, though he seems to have inserted himself into the community seamlessly since moving in with Phoebe back in her hometown.
Your desire to speak to Javi alone now feels like desperation as you ask to admire Brendan and Phoebe’s new back porch. 
‘Sure, you two go catch up’ Brendan motions towards the French doors. You turn on your heel casually, and can practically feel Javi’s presence behind you. Phoebe is busy talking to some girlfriends, but nonetheless shoots you a stern look as she watches you head outside with your teenage sweetheart. You quickly avert your eyes and step out into the garden, setting the glasses onto the table and taking a seat on a deck chair.
Tumblr media
The music is muted as Javi closes the doors, and there’s a glint in his eye now, telling you you’re about to be at the receiving end of some Peña sass. 
‘Here’s a sight for sore eyes’ his deep voice rumbles as he pulls the chair to sit closer to you. He sits down and leans back, looking you up and down and you aren’t sure if it’s the cold causing goosebumps to rise on your skin. 
‘Last I heard you had disappeared out of state to live the domestic dream’. 
You exhale with a scoff as you open the bottle of Scotch and pour both of you a glass. 
‘Yeah. Something like that.’
Javi’s fingers brush yours as he takes the drink. 
‘Hm. So what made you come back then? Couldn’t handle the Cali life?’ He raises his eyebrows at you in challenge, but you try not to let it rattle you. 
‘Long story. Guess it was time to come back to my roots. Reconnect with old friends. Sometimes it’s good to go back to what you know’. You smile genuinely as you turn over your shoulder to watch Phoebe and Brendan laugh with their guests, most of them people Javi and you had grown up with. 
Javi chuckles as he follows your gaze. 
‘I guess. Though seriously, you’re telling me you’re choosing a provincial Christmas party over some swanky soirée up in L.A. now?’
You know you’ve got bold, quick-witted Javi in front of you now, trying to get a rise out of you as your gaze is on you. But you’ve always been more than capable of holding your own when he’s like this. 
‘Ain’t too bad. Full of… good food and lousy beer’ you respond as you break eye contact and watch the whisky swirling around your glass before taking a long swig. You say a silent prayer for your stamina when it comes to drinking. 
‘Darlin’…’ Javi starts and your throat constricts at the same pet name Brendan had used so innocently only a few minutes ago, now that it is uttered in Javi’s deep baritone voice. ‘How come you’re back here? Everythin’ alright with… what’s his name…John?’
You intently focus on the fairy lights in the trees ahead of you for a few moments. 
‘It’s Josh, and we've split up. So I’ve moved back here for the time being. Spend some time with Ma and Pa. But I’m doing really well, actually.’’ You swallow, fearing you’ve maybe said a little too much, sounded a little too cheery. Javi’s silence and the way he seems to be searching your face only feed into your anxieties further. You slowly sip some more Whisky, deciding to turn the tables on him:
‘You look like you could do with a listening ear yourself - don’t pretend all’s well with you either. You fancy a walk?’ 
Javi snickers: ‘Alright. I got some more whisky down at the ranch. You could say hello to the horses - still have a few there.’
‘Wanna show me your horse collection now, do you Peña?’ You wink at him. 
Javi says nothing but flashes you a lop-sided smile that makes your legs go funny. He tells you to wait outside and dashes back through the French doors. 
Within a few seconds, Phoebe is leaning out from the living-room.
‘You ok, hon? Need us to call you a cab?’ The look on her face tells you she already knows your answer.
‘Thanks, but I’ll be ok. Javi’s walking me. We’re just catching up‘’
Phoebe sips on her garish cocktail, but her eyes never leave yours. 
‘Alright. Guess Christmas is the time for some nostalgia. Just don’t go too far down memory lane.’
Javi appears holding the same denim jacket he was walking around in when you were dating in college. A leopard never changes his spots, you think to yourself. Silently, you pray he hasn’t heard Phoebe’s comment. You finish your drink and pass the glasses to Phoebe. 
‘Don’t worry about me - thanks for a great party.’ You give her a quick hug and turn towards Javi, who is hovering by the back gate. As you leave, ‘Have Yourself a Merry Little Christmas’ plays. Javi wraps the jacket around your shoulders and you wonder just how much the two of you look like your teenage selves. 
Tumblr media
A brisk walk in the night air had cleared your senses somewhat, but you were feeling the effects of the glass of Pinot Noir Javi had dug out from his dad’s pantry. Never did you think you’d see the two of you share a bottle of red wine out on the porch. 
You had been subjected to Agent Peña’s interrogative skills and had eventually told him about your and Josh’s relationship breakdown, entirely unfiltered. Your body felt like that invisible string was running between the two of you again, electricity sparking through your fingertips straight to your chest. The feeling overwhelmed you and the words were practically tumbling from your lips before you heard them yourself. You rattle on and on about the news, the terrible incident down in Dallas - his response a short grumble and an angry shake of his head - the all female spacewalk, the Supreme Court proceedings and your anger at them. Somehow, you end up sharing how things fell apart with you and Josh, how he would spend days on end making you feel like you weren’t worth the dirt on his shoes. At some point, you were sure you heard him sneer a ‘lo mataré’ (I’ll kill him’) through gritted teeth. 
The intimacy between Javi and you, which had picked up exactly where it had lied buried for years, had been a little overwhelming. Strolling through familiar streets downtown, past houses illuminated from the inside by grandiose Christmas trees in picture-perfect living rooms, you felt a sense of having fallen into one of those daydreams you had pushed down for years, only rising to the surface in the aftermath of the most toxic fights between you and Josh, when you had yearned for the simplicity and ease of your first love. You twist in your chair and pull your knees up to your chest as you look at Javi. 
‘Anyway, what’s going on with you, exactly? How come the golden boy also returned to his old stomping ground?’
Javi doesn’t answer for a few seconds, instead watching out over the paddocks of the ranch. The two of you had opted to sit out on the porch once again back at his place, a light wind providing a breeze but not yet making you feel cold. You kept Javi’s denim jacket wrapped around your shoulders nonetheless. 
The despondent look crosses over his face again and he is clenching his jaw. You can just make out the music playing from the stereo inside. 
You think Javi is about to speak when he reaches for the bottle of wine and pours you another large measure, then himself an even larger one.
‘Jav’ you prompt, tapping your foot against his. He glances at your ankle for a second, then looks at you directly. Suddenly, you feel tipsy and lightheaded but keep your composure. You take the glass from his hand, having to gently wrestle it from him. Yet his limbs seem to relax a little when you place your hand on his forearm.
‘I just…’ he starts, then seems to reconsider. ‘Things got intense down there, and I just wanted to stop those fuckers. At any cost. And I guess sipping mid-range wine at a Christmas house party is the cost of the choices I made. You won’t believe this, but this one time…’
Javi talks about the agreements he entered with people he wouldn’t usually want to share his air with and opens up about some of the things he had to witness down in Colombia. He clearly hasn’t gotten over how he was treated and made an example of, and your heart aches for the older and more jaded version of the idealistic, albeit hot-headed young man he had always remained in your head up until tonight. Cuddling up on the deck chair next to him, you place your hand in the crook of his elbow, and he trails off as you sit in comfortable silence for a while. 
‘C’m here’ Javi suddenly says as he grabs your hand and stands. ‘Let’s have a dance’. 
‘What?’ you ask and don’t move from your seat, but Javi simply takes your glass and places it on the large table behind him. He pulls you up towards him, placing his hand on the small of your back. You lean your head against his chest as you sway slowly. 
And it's hard to be at a party when I feel like an open wound
It's hard to be anywhere these days when all I want is you
You're a flashback in a film reel on the one screen in my town
And I just wanted you to know
That this is me trying
(And maybe I don't quite know what to say)
I just wanted you to know
That this is me trying
At least I'm trying
‘You know I’ve never forgotten about you, right?’ 
Javi’s comment stops you dead in your tracks. You pull back from him to try to find his face. He is looking straight ahead at nothing in particular, out in the distance, but you can clearly see his glassy eyes, and he is now definitely slurring his words. You lean into the crook of his neck again as you whisper. 
‘I know. Me…me neither. It was for the best though.’ The knot in your stomach has returned.
‘Was it?’ he asks quietly.
‘Jav… you wanted to go and play GI Joe, remember?’ a little laugh escapes you. ‘There was no way you’d have turned down that DEA assignment to play house with me. And… that’s ok, we were basically kids.’
Javi mirrors your laugh now. ‘Hm. Guess that’s true, darlin’. Did you have to leave in the middle of the night though?’
You pull back slightly, but Javi is still holding you tightly against his chest. 
‘Jav, that last conversation we had was painful enough. And you were passed out from that night out with the boys. What good would it have done?’
Javi leans over towards the table and grabs his glass. He takes a quick sip as you continue to swing from side to side and you wonder how much searching the bottom of a glass has become a coping mechanism for him as he continues:
‘My dad would’ve wanted to see you before you left, too.’
You smile sadly thinking about Chucho.
‘I came back the day after to pick up the rest of my things, once you had already gone. He was so kind, given the situation.’
Javi looks surprised but chuckles.
‘Figures. He always liked ya.’
Warmth fills you remembering the laughs you shared with the older Mr Peña, his kindness radiating from him as you spent barbecues and movie nights with him and Javi at the ranch. The place you had often imagined living yourself at. 
‘You know you never asked me to come with you, either’ - a slight hint of bitterness infuses your words and Javi shakes his head. 
‘You? In Colombia? That place would have tainted you.’
‘And how did you know that, then huh?’ you widen your eyes in challenge at Javi, but he holds your gaze.
‘Ah come on, you just said how we were just kids. Plus, you were ready to leave, too. Always thinking of flying off…my little …’
‘Don’t’. It’s your turn to interrupt Javi now, as you pull away from him, unsure how you’ll react to the pet name the two of you only used for each other when you were alone together…
‘...butterfly’.
A single solitary tear falls down your cheek. You feel like the past few years have disappeared into a void, like it was only a few days ago that you closed the door to Javi’s bedroom one final time. Javi wipes the tear away gently, but keeps his hand on your face for a moment, rubbing your cheekbone with his calloused thumb. When he removes his hand as you start to speak, the warmth of him stays on your skin for a little while longer and comforts you. 
‘It’s really good to see you’ you admit. ‘That party was fun, but I think my social stamina isn’t what it used to be. It’s funny, but I’ve been around people constantly since coming back, mom and dad hovering around me all the time, but I’ve never felt more lonely’. Once again, the words have left your lips before you can think.
‘Guess you don’t have to be alone to be lonesome’ Javi replies as he places his chin on the top of your head. 
‘I’ve missed you’ you say softly. 
Javi’s eyes dash down to the ground briefly and you can smell the alcohol on his breath. You tell him he smells like a brewery and laugh at him, but realize you’re in the company of the only soul who could always tell which smiles you were faking. Closing your eyes, you allow yourself to drop the grin and inhale his scent to welcome the familiarity and nostalgia that lingers underneath. Javi wraps you up tighter and lifts your chin with his fingers, pulling you towards him before meeting his lips with yours. 
Whereas you felt a simmering kind of electricity before, your body now feels like it’s been hit by lightning. You try to focus on the music in the background as you taste wine, whisky and something that is purely Javi on his lips. 
Feeling like a teenager again, you run your tongue along his lower lip and he gasps, swallowing your moans in response. Javi strips off his jacket from your shoulders, and a chill that you know isn’t merely from the cold runs along your spine. His fingertips are rubbing up and down your arms and he smoothly pulls the straps of your dress down. Wrapping your arms around his neck, you try to anchor yourself to Javi as he sits back down on the sturdy deck chair and pulls you to sit on top of him. 
It feels like your heart is about to burst out of your chest when you can feel him hardening through his jeans underneath you. All you want is more of Javi, and pretend he was never gone from your life. Your core is aching with need for him and your muscles are stiffening with how tightly you are trapping him between your thighs. Eventually, you break the kiss to catch your breath, but stay pressed to him, his large hands now caressing your buttocks and providing you with some much-needed friction as he rubs you along his length.
‘I know we were so… young, but…did it ever…feel like it did between us with…him?’ Javi pants, interspersing his words with little pecks on your lips that feel almost chaste, were it not for the fact you are basically dry-humping each other like you used to in the back of his first car. 
You whine as you know the truth deep down: Nobody had ever made you feel the way Javi had, and though you had put the intensity of your time together down to teenage hormones, you had often made yourself come to the memories you had of his touch over the years. 
‘Javi… I need you… now’ you stutter as you frantically work to pry open his shirt. Running your fingernails down his warm chest, you feel his quickening breath on your skin. Javi drags your dress down, revealing your chest to him. He strokes your breasts, only stopping to swirling his tongue round your nipples, one by one. He halts suddenly, and you worry that he’s come to his senses. But when you move your head from where it was nestled in his shoulder, you realize that he has spotted the tattoo you got your first week after leaving Texas. 
‘Mi mariposa’ he whispers as he traces the outline of the turquoise butterfly on your ribcage with his fingers. You feel tears threatening to spill from your eyes again, flashes of Josh’s derision at your ‘common’ tattoo entering your mind.
Arching your back and gripping a fistful of Javi’s hair, you don’t care that you’re pleading with him now:
‘Javi, please. Fuck me.’
He growls as his lust-filled eyes find yours.
‘Fuck, baby. Sound so good when you beg. Thought I’d never hear that again. D’you wanna go inside?’
‘No…no, just… right here, now. Please’ you utter as you scoot backwards slightly to gain access to his zipper. Javi takes your hands and wraps your wrists behind your back with one of his, quickly shuffling his jeans down enough to reveal himself to you.
Javi is still holding your wrists in one of his hands, but pushes you slightly up and forward, before using his remaining free hand to guide his cock at your entrance. He moans when he feels how wet you are for him. You gasp and thank past you for daring to go without underwear tonight.
‘You ready, baby? Need you to ride this cock so much.’ Javi’s needy voice matching yours.
Your response is to kiss him once again as you sink down onto him, groaning when you take him inside of you. Both of you take a moment to adjust to the feeling, foreheads resting against one another. You can’t hold out much longer though and have to start moving on top of him before long. 
Your knees are sore from rubbing against the wooden deckchair, but you could care less about that now. The pressure is building from your pussy quickly, and as your moans become louder, you gratefully remember that Javi said his dad was spending the night at a friend’s house for poker night. 
You wrestle your hands from Javi’s hold to find the back of his head again, grabbing two fistfuls of his curls for purchase as you bounce on him, slowly, with control to savour the feeling. Javi runs a hand up your neck and pulls your hair just hard enough for pleasure and pain to mix deliciously.  
‘Yes, mariposa, ride me. Make yourself feel good. Need to see you come so bad’ Javi growls as he thrusts up into you, and you know you’re not far off. You run your cheek along his, his stubble scratching you softly as, emboldened by the alcohol in your system, you murmur into his ear.
‘...was never like us… he was never.. like you’.
Something between a moan and a sob leaves Javi’s lips and it’s what sends you over the edge, your orgasm rippling through you like a wave as heat envelops you. You tip your head back and Javi latches onto the soft skin of your exposed throat to him. He sucks hard and you can feel him pulsate inside you now.
‘Come inside me Javier’ you mutter as you ride out the last of your high. 
Javi’s fingers dig into your sides and you pray that he leaves marks on you so that you have something to remember this night by in the morning. He says your name over and over as he finds his release inside of you. 
Flushed and out of breath, the two of you stay in the same position for what feels like hours as you drift in and out of a light sleep, the music in the background fading in eventually. 
The holidays linger like bad perfume
You can run, but only so far
I escaped it too, remember how you watched me leave
But if it's okay with you, it's okay with me
Tumblr media
You wake on the couch, sunrays dancing on the wooden floor. You dimly remember Javi carrying you into the lounge and laying you down, stretching out behind you as the remaining warmth of the fireplace lulls you back into a deep sleep. A woolen blanket is wrapped around you, but you can’t feel Javi next to you. Panic floods you and you briefly wonder if that is how he felt when he woke up without you that morning all those years ago. But the next second, the smell of coffee enters your nostrils and you turn to your side to see Javi in the kitchen, his broad back to you as he moves around quietly, the birds singing outside and music from the radio the only sounds you can make out. 
You take your time to admire the man only a few feet from you, familiar yet new. Javi turns around and looks at you from over his shoulder, the soft smile you were desperately searching for last night now playing on his face.
‘Mornin’’ he says, cheerfully but quietly, as he walks over with two coffee cups in his hand. ‘Thought this might wake you. You fancy havin’ these outside?’
You stretch your limbs and only now notice how sore your head is.
‘Ew, yes please. Fresh air and caffeine sound heavenly right now.’
Javi nods to something above you. ‘I, uh, brought you one of my shirts, in case you… fancied some comfier clothes’. 
You turn to find a soft flannel shirt thrown over the back of the sofa. Smiling to yourself, you pull it on over your head. Javi chuckles silently and you feel slightly self-conscious. 
‘What?’ you ask slightly perturbed. 
‘Nothing, ‘s just… this is how I remember you’ he replies and moves towards you almost hesitantly. After placing the hot mug of coffee in your hand, he lightly pulls you towards him by your waist, placing a soft kiss on your lips. 
Sipping your coffee, the two of you sit once more in comfortable silence on the deck chairs you’ll never look at the same way, as life starts up on the ranch, Javi having let out the horses first thing in the morning, and you marvel at how right this feels again already. Surprisingly, it’s Javi who speaks first. 
‘So, what are your plans for Christmas?’
You had forgotten it was Christmas Eve today.
‘Uh, I’ll just be at my folks’ tomorrow.Guess I’ll go and see Phoebe and Brendan at some point. You?’
‘Just me and dad. Will be a quiet one this year, the holidays are hard for him, what with mom no longer around.’
You give Javi a soft smile and rest your head against his shoulder. 
‘I can imagine’.
Javi nuzzles the top of your head with his nose. 
‘Hm. Pop always says if we make it through December everything's gonna be alright.’
As you lean up to kiss Javi, he places yours and his coffee mug down and takes your face in between his hands, rubbing his thumbs on your temples soothingly, making you close your eyes. His voice sounds shaky, barely above a whisper:
‘Hey, I just… had a thought. Do you, maybe, fancy… going away for a bit after the holidays?’
You open your eyes and can see something like worry on his face.
‘Like, where?’ you ask.
Javi looks away but pulls you onto his lap, wrapping a blanket he had brought out from the couch around you.
‘I don’t know. Somewhere, somewhere different, new. Maybe even California? I‘m not talking L.A. - wild horses couldn’t drag me up there and I guess you don’t want to go back there right now… but somewhere out in the mountains, maybe? Somewhere quiet. Never been to Yosemite.’
Contemplating his suggestion, any worries you’d had about going back to square one suddenly seem a lifetime away. 
‘Yes, that… that sounds perfect, Jav.’
167 notes · View notes
ezrasbirdie · 2 years
Text
cool girl
Tumblr media
summary: We all found our own ways to entertain ourselves during quarantine. Yours happened to be sending Dieter Bravo a picture of a raccoon on Instagram every Wednesday. He’s never once answered. But what happens when he does?
rating: E [warnings: SMUT but nothing outrageous unless you hate praise kink, discussion/mentions of the pandemic and Covid-19 as a background due to the setting/time period, alcohol use, me pretending I know fuck all about interior design or how IG works nowadays]
pairing: Dieter Bravo x f!reader
word count: ~8.5k (I really considered making this two parts lmao)
note: Okay so I finished something, and I wanted to give it to @coastielaceispunk​ because she deserves everything nice. And even if I don’t know if this is my very best work, it’s pretty fun and soft and funny, so! Thanks to @starlightmornings​ for the beta, I’ll run the taglist tomorrow at some point probably. Oh, and in case you’re wondering--yes, I made those, and I am so proud of them.
masterlist | series masterlist
~
You couldn’t remember the last time you left the apartment. Two weeks turned into months, with no end in sight, and you’d resigned yourself to Zoom hangouts and chats with your dog for the foreseeable future. 
“Truth or dare?” 
For fuck’s sake.
“Again?” You asked. Your friends had gotten way too into the most annoying game on the planet, but it was something to do. You could only play so much rounds of Jackbox.
“Dare,” you sighed, not ready for the trauma-bonding that inevitably followed “truth”. 
Taylor, your best friend of ten years and chief bullshit instigator, broke into a grin that made you want to backpedal. She was pretty and blonde and wore red lipstick even under a mask. You missed getting into harmless trouble with her.
“I dare you to send Dieter Bravo a message on Instagram.” 
A great chorus of cackling came from the rest of the group as you rolled your eyes. “Very funny,” you said. 
“I’m not kidding! I dare you!” Taylor insisted. “He might respond!” 
“He won’t,” you said. Not only was Taylor the chief bullshit instigator, but the chief investigator, too. She was too nosy for her own good, and after finding out about the soft spot you nursed for the eccentric actor, she never let it go.  
“You don’t know! Come on, it’ll be funny. Send him a raccoon meme,” she goaded. 
“A raccoon?”
“He kinda has a raccoon vibe,” she pointed out. Her boyfriend leaned into the frame and nodded agreement.
“Total raccoon vibes,” he confirmed.
“What’s the worst that can happen?” Taylor asked, knocking the remains of her glass of rosé.
“He can think I’m fucking crazy and block me.”
“He probably won’t even see it!”
You sigh. “Fine! Fuck, fine. I’m not playing this game ever again.”
“That’s fair,” Taylor said, shrugging.
You weren’t getting out of this without looking like a total brat. You pulled your phone out, chose the first image after Googling “raccoon meme”, took a deep breath as you open your Instagram messages, and hit send.
Tumblr media
[Image description:
Instagram Direct Message between reader and dieterbravo420
Reader sent an image of a raccoon that says "I am up to no good, I will be actively disturbing the peace]
Okay, that was pretty fucking funny.
“There,” you said, holding your phone up as proof. “You happy?”
Taylor’s cackling laughter sent you into hysterics. She was right. What was the harm? Maybe he’d see it, maybe he’d find it funny. Maybe he’d answer you back, and you’d start chatting and then he’d realize you were the love of his life and then you could live the life of a famous movie star and, sure, he seemed to have a drug problem, but—
Girl stop are you out of your fuckin’ minddddd? The logical part of your brain, though a little tipsy, kicked in, and you shook those ridiculous thoughts right out of your brain. 
It was your turn, and you forgot all about the picture as the game went on. Later that night, lying in bed giggling to yourself, you checked your messages. Just in case. He hadn’t replied. You ignored the pinprick of disappointment in your stomach. 
But a week later, you sent another one. And then another one the next week. And then, suddenly, it was a scheduled Wednesday activity. He never opened them, but you sent them anyway. It was your own private joke, something stupid to get you through everything happening around you. And besides, how hilarious would it be for him to open it, only to be met with an avalanche of raccoon pictures? 
He was never really supposed to see them.
**
A year into this fucking pandemic and, finally, he has some work. Dieter Bravo spent most of the last year laying on his carpet, blitzed out of his mind on anything he could get his hands on. He needed something to do, dammit. 
Dieter was fully aware his life had been easier than ninety-five percent of the people on the planet over the last year, but that didn’t mean he wasn’t close to another nervous breakdown. 
It wasn’t so bad in this weird compound he wasn’t allowed to leave, though. Unlimited KitKats and that pretty front desk girl and all the drugs he could ask for. If he’d had to spend another moment alone in his big, empty house, he was going to walk into the ocean.
Things started getting weird fast, though. The security firm responsible for putting those trackers on all of them blew Lauren’s hand off, and the producers acted like that was a perfectly normal, if unfortunate, occurrence. 
The fuckin’ director was no better, running half the cast off set before the day can even start, and Dieter wasn’t known to keep his thoughts to himself.
“Got any good notes for that, Mr. Sundance?” Dieter asked after the most recent disastrous take, rolling his eyes. Maybe he was being a brat—he was definitely being a brat—but damn, he was just ready to go now. Even if it meant going back to the big empty house and all his thoughts. 
Dieter had been shitty to Darren since the beginning, keeping his distance because he knew directors like this—one hit and they think they’re fucking Steven Spielberg with the ego to match. 
Darren’s reaction was…unexpected.
“You’re a poser,” Darren snapped, rant finally over, and walked away.
“I’m posing with my Oscar!” Dieter yelled, but it didn’t sound as cool as it did in his head. He stomped off the set to lick his wounds in peace.
Usually it was just a matter of smoking a joint, maybe jerking off for a while, but his mind refused to clear. If anything, his loneliness worsened—even if he had someone around to help to take his mind off things, it’s not like they’d stay for conversation afterward. No one ever wanted him around for that long.
Dieter picked up his phone, tapped the Instagram icon, and scrolled idly. He didn’t really understand what he was looking at. It was all ads for shit he didn’t want. Technically, he wasn’t allowed access to his account—not since Instagram threatened to delete it for too many Community Guidelines violations—but his assistant took pity on him during quarantine and had, apparently, forgotten to revoke the privileges. 
He sighed as he scrolled through his own tag. Not even kind words from adoring fans were enough to pull him out of his funk. 
What if Hunger Strike really was a fluke? 
Dieter hadn’t wanted to entertain the thought, but Darren’s words echoed in his head. No one seemed to think he was taking this role seriously, which pissed him off. They’d given him a half-written script to play a villain they couldn’t even bother to assign an actual nationality to. 
“What accent am I supposed to be doing?” He’d asked, and they’d shrugged. 
So no, he wasn’t taking this seriously. It wasn’t a bad gig, but if they weren’t putting their best into it, why should he? And they’d had the audacity to complain about his “attitude” at the welcome dinner. 
Fuck them.
And, still, he practiced the stupid accent alone in his hotel room.
Surely there’d be something in his DMs to distract him. He didn’t make a habit of answering or even answering messages from people he didn’t know, but, well, desperate times. 
Lots of ‘I love yous’, lots of ‘I’d suck your dick for free’, lots of messages that start out with DADDY!!! (which, to be fair, made him giggle), but nothing really interesting. Script pitches from desperate up-and-coming filmmakers. One, though, sent a day or two ago, just says “Sent an image.”
It piqued his curiosity. The tiny icon was a pretty face with a sweet smile, and they looked normal. So he opened it up and found…raccoons? Dozens of pictures of raccoons with weird shit written on the images, sent every Wednesday like clockwork for a year. He spent twenty whole minutes browsing through them and laughing. How fucking weird. 
He loved them, but they weren’t the only things she’d sent.
She started sending sporadic messages in September.
I hope you’re not too lonely. 
He had been. 
Happy Halloween!
He didn’t remember Halloween. 
Merry Christmas!
He didn’t remember Christmas, either.  
She might have checked in on him more last year than his entire family and circle of friends combined.
Dieter finally clicked her picture. He had to know what kind of person sends a stranger pictures and messages so regularly, never once asking for a response.
He found a regular girl with a dog named Delilah. Pictures of friends and coffee and home improvement projects and the bread she learned to bake and her favorite Star Wars Funko Pop and romantic interests that just didn’t pan out. He lost himself in her normal person life, scrolling and scrolling until he got to the bottom, to her very first picture from years and years ago. Another dog—not Delilah—in her lap, as she held up a college diploma. Finally, the caption said.
He moved back to the DMs and typed a message. He shouldn’t respond, really, but he was high enough that it seems like a good idea. What was the worst that could happen?
these r hilarious
And for good measure, he found a picture of a screaming possum and hit send. He turned off the lights and let sleep take him, finally, not thinking of Darren’s words even once. 
He hoped she liked the possum. 
**
Seen 1hr ago
Well, that could not possibly be right. You’d never seen that notification before. Ever. Not once. Dieter Bravo was a movie star—he was supposed to have a public account that fans follow for news, and a private one that all his real friends and family follow. That’s how it worked. Everyone knew that.
This was just a bug. A glitch. 
Definitely. 
Typing…
“Oh, what the fuck?” You yelled, earning a scowl from Delilah.
You hurled the phone across the room like it was timed to explode. It landed with a thud next to a pile of laundry, and you peered at it over the edge of your bed. This was a trap. 
The sinister ding! of a DM sounded, and you got up from your bed, approaching it carefully. There was a new picture, one you hadn’t sent. A simple possum hissing in alarm at the camera, followed by a message:
 these r hilarious
“What the fuck?” You shouted.
Delilah jumped off the bed and stood next to you, looking up in interest. “Look at this, Delilah,” you said, shoving the phone under her nose as though she could understand. She said nothing because she was a dog.
It’d been a long year.
Delilah was more concerned with the fact that it was dinner time than that a famous actor replied to your absolutely ridiculous series of messages.
Should you respond? It was probably just a one-off thing. Like a publicity stunt. But still, it was rude to leave someone on read, right? 
Thanks! I picked them all just for you 😂
You hovered over send. Was it weird? Were you being weird? 
Fuck it, you thought, and hit send.
**
She was funny. 
That was why he kept talking to her. 
She still sent him raccoons on Wednesdays. 
He followed her back to see more pictures of Delilah. Definitely not to see the posts of her walking in the park, or her stories about the plant she had just bought and was not going to kill. He didn’t care about her early morning selfies. Not a bit. 
She was just really cool. A cool girl. That was all. 
That was why, eventually, he’d get her phone number and send her texts, and she’d feel more like a real friend. Because she was—she was his real friend. When was the last time he’d made a real friend?
She thought he was good in Hunger Strike, and that mattered to him, for some reason.
**
Was it a silly PR stunt? Did you really care? It kept you entertained, at least. You weren’t foolish enough to think that Dieter Bravo himself was actually sending you messages. But then he followed you, and that’s…weird. 
No one noticed until he liked a picture of Delilah. 
You didn’t have that many followers on Instagram, but from the way your phone blew up with notifications, every single one of them noticed that like. Taylor even called you. She never called.
“Is that Dieter fucking Bravo?” She screamed, foregoing a hello. You chewed your lip. Taylor didn’t know about the messages.
“Okay, don’t be mad?”
“Depends,” she said. 
“So…remember like a year ago when you dared me to send a raccoon meme to him?” 
“No?”
Of course.
“Well, you did. I kind of…kept doing it,” you explained, trading your lip for your fingernail between your teeth.
“You kept doing what, exactly?” She asked after a brief pause. 
You took a deep breath. “Look, you know how shitty everything’s been. I just, you know, sent him pictures and memes of raccoons every Wednesday that reminded me of him.”
“Oh my God,” she said, cackling. “You’re fucking crazy! I love that!”
“He wasn’t supposed to see them!” 
“But he did?” 
“Yeah. And he answered me one day and sent a picture of a possum and now we talk. A lot, actually. I thought it was some assistant at first playing a prank, but now I don’t think so.”
“You know I need to see the proof, right?”
“Taylor—”
“Oh, come on! I won’t show anyone!”
“I’ll just show you in person. You’re all vaccinated, right?”
“Duh,” she said, a hint of defensiveness at your questioning. 
“Just making sure,” you placated. 
Two days later, your schedules lined up, and Taylor was just throwing her bag on the entryway table when you got a new possum. You sent a raccoon in reply.
Tumblr media
[Image description: Instagram Direct Message between reader and dieterbravo420 dieterbravo420: (picture of a possum that says "My drip is immaculate and my depression is constant") this u? lol reader: nah, this is u tho :P (picture of a raccoon that says "I am a luxury few can tolerate")]
“All right,” you said as she made herself comfortable. “See?”
You thrusted the phone at her. Her eyes went wide as she scrolled up, and you snatched it back before she could find anything that made you look desperate. Anything sent when you were drunk, for instance. 
“That’s the craziest thing I’ve ever seen,” she declared, giggling. 
“I’m sure it’s just someone fucking around. Making him seem more approachable, you know?”
She looked at you. “No offense, but what the fuck do they care about you? You have like sixty followers. I think, in this case, it makes more sense for it to actually be him. Right, Delilah?” Delilah barked. “See? Delilah knows.”
After splitting a bottle of wine and catching up, Taylor headed home, still giggling over your new friend. You settled into bed, scrolling before you fell asleep as always, despite every sleep hygiene study in the world warning against it. 
Dieter Bravo sent a message
Weird. It must be close to three in the morning where he is. 
u up?
Uhhhhhh. 
yeah i’m bored go to sleep it’s late can’t sleep they put us in quarantine again put who? the cast and crew ur really part of the movie? i’m a fuckin actor wait do you not know who i am i mean….i thought u were like a PR person why would u talk to me if i was a PR person? my life is a lot more boring than yours i guess i can show u. wanna ft?
Your heart leapt into your throat. It felt like a prank. But what if it wasn’t? Imagine passing up the opportunity to talk to your favorite actor, face to face?
So you agreed.
He was real. It was really him—fluffy haired and patchy-bearded with a big, genuine smile. 
“This is so weird,” you remarked as he showed you around his fancy hotel prison. Everything was ornate and gold, and it didn’t match him.
“Maybe,” he said, shrugging. “Everyone here sucks. Everyone in Hollywood sucks.”
“How do you know I’m not in Hollywood?”
“You’re too sweet. Like a peach.” 
There was a pause as you swallowed and tried to think of something to say, but he moved on. “Is Delilah around?” 
Delilah perked up at the mention of her name. She was curled up at the foot of your bed. “Yeah, she’s around. Delilah, your biggest fan is on the phone.”
His eyes brightened as she came into the frame. “Hey, beautiful,” he said. Delilah was a smart dog, but you didn’t think she really understood the whole person-in-screen thing. 
The conversation lulled for just a second after you ran out of things to say about Delilah, but he picked it back up, talking enough for the both of you. EMFs mess with your brain, birds weren’t real, he couldn’t get the accent for this movie down because the character didn’t even have a set nationality. His director was an asshole. There was a girl named Anika he liked, but he was worried she was too young.
He didn’t ask you a thing about yourself. 
It shouldn’t really surprise you, but it did. It wasn’t like you hadn’t been talking over text for the last few weeks. Maybe he just got nervous. 
“How do you have so much energy?” You asked, faking a yawn. “It’s so late over there. Or early, I guess.”
“Adderall,” he said matter-of-factly. 
So that’s why he’d wanted to talk. You should have known.
“Well,” you murmured, checking the clock. “Some of us have work in the morning.”
“Can I call you again?” He asked. You giggled at the thought, as though the whole conversation wasn’t some kind of upper-fueled, manic decision he made out of boredom. 
“Oh, yeah. Totally,” you said. “I’ll count on it.”
He frowned, though. “I will.”
“Uh huh. I believe you, Bravo.” It’s the first time you’ve said his name out loud.
“I will! I mean, if you want me to,” he said, scratching the back of neck, suddenly not so self-assured. 
“I do,” you said. “If you want to.” 
His grin came back. You liked it better than the frown.
**
She wanted him to call again, even though he’d been totally keyed up and being a terrible conversationalist, and she still wanted to hear from him. And that thought was enough to get him, though exhausted, through the rest of the day. 
**
He really called.
He wasn’t so wired up now. This time he sounded sleepy and soft, like he’d fallen asleep and woken up just to call you. 
“Can I see you?” He asked. “I wanna tell you something that happened a few weeks ago. It was crazy, and I wanna see your reaction.”
“Fine,” you said. “But I have a face mask on, so you’re going through my night routine with me.”
“You say it like I don’t have one of those,” he said. 
Which, okay, fair point. 
He asked you what products you use. Everything was from CVS, but he acted interested. You doubted Dieter Bravo was using Burt’s Bees witch hazel, but he nodded along regardless. 
“You have really nice skin. Sweet and soft as a peach,” he said, and instead of swatting the compliment away, you smiled and thanked him. 
“Okay. Tell me about your co-star’s hand getting blown off?” 
** 
Dieter called a lot, actually. 
He really must be lonely. 
You talked to him more in those two weeks than you’d talked to anyone else all year, except maybe for Taylor. 
He listened, too. 
“Look, do what you want,” you said, “But the twenty-seven-year-old hotel employee just screams creepy power imbalance. You’re, what, forty-three?” You asked like you don’t know everything the internet has to offer on the man.
“So?”
“You’re just in different places in life. That’s all.”
“And how old are you?” He asked, indignant as you giggled at him.
“Wouldn’t you like to know?” 
**
For the first time in almost a year and a half, you had plans. 
You debated telling him you’ll be out late. It had been a week, and he’d FaceTimed you every night at nine since that first day. But it wasn’t like he was your boyfriend or anything, despite a few flirty remarks here and there. It’d be weird to tell him your plans, right? Or maybe it’d be rude. And maybe he wouldn’t even call. 
You settled on not telling him. 
Taylor asked about him, of course, and you just shrug. Taylor had been your best friend for years and years and years, and your stomach clenched lying to her, but you weren’t sure what this thing was. If you told her, she’d point out all the red flags, and you’d have no choice but to listen to her and shut this whole thing down.
You didn’t want to shut it down. Not yet.
At nine, your phone buzzed. The gallery opening is pretty good, but you were mostly in it for the open bar and canapés. You didn’t answer. 
🍑? out w a friend ): i’ll be home in like an hour. you don’t have any other friends you can talk to? jeez i don’t like any of them and you like me? more than them
You set the phone down and rolled your eyes.
“Hey,” you said, trying to keep your voice casual. “I think I’m gonna head home.”
“What? It’s so early!”
“I know. I’m just tired. Wine makes me sleepy now, I guess,” you lied.
“Well, all right. I’m gonna stay, if you have a way home.”
“Just called a ride.”
She gave you a suspicious once-over, but didn’t push it. You weren’t totally lying; your eyelids were heavier than usual. You just happened to have someone to talk to when you get in bed. 
He’d never seen you all done up before, though. Maybe you’d keep it on a little longer.
**
“You look pretty,” he rasped, taking another hit off the joint. Thirty minutes later and he’d been babbling about something someone did on set. You could never keep the names straight of all the B-list actors he talked about. “You always look pretty, but you…you know. Always pretty.”
“Thanks,” you giggled. “I think.”
“You have a date or something?”
You caught the waver in his voice as he looked away from the camera. 
“No. Nothing like that,” you said. “Just an art opening.”
“You like art?”
“Sure. I like the free food a lot, too. It was one of Taylor’s friends.”
“I like art,” he murmured. “I like to paint.”
He admitted it like a secret, whispered and furtive.
“What do you paint?”
“Nothing really…good, I guess. I did this last time they quarantined us.” 
He panned the camera to the wall opposite—
“Is that—”
“It’s just a copy—”
“Yeah, like, an exact copy of Goya’s Saturn Devouring His Son?”
He pulled the camera back to him and shrugged, a sheepish grin tugging at his lips. “I have original stuff, too. It’s back home.”
“Well, maybe you’ll show me one day,” you said, offhand. You weren’t serious, it’s just something people say, but your stomach roiled as soon as the words left your mouth. He was never going to show his original paintings, because this was just a temporary situation. He was only talking to you because there was no one else to talk to. “Uh, anyway.”
“So you don’t have a boyfriend or anything?” He asked abruptly, and you almost spit out your wine. Which wouldn’t be the worst thing in the world, because you don’t need to drink any more. 
“No, Bravo, I do not,” you chuckled. 
“How’s that possible, man? You’re the whole package.” 
“Shut up. How come you don’t have anyone special?”
“That’s easy. I’m a fuck up,” he said, coughing out a laugh. “I can’t even get laid. It’s been months.”
You snort.
“I haven’t had sex in over a year, Dieter. Remember? The whole pandemic?”
“Negative tests required,” he said, shrugging. “I’m responsible, peach.”
He’d never called you that before. The word washed over you, warming you more than the merlot sloshing around in your mug. 
“It’s really been a year?” He asked after a minute. 
“Over! January 2020,” you lamented, alcohol loosening your tongue. “And it wasn’t even good.”
“How do you function?” Dieter asked. He was genuinely curious. 
“I mean…for the most part, I’ve been too stressed to care. And they make these things called vibrators that do the job better than most guys I’ve been with, so. You know?”
He shook his head. “What a waste.”
“What’s that supposed to mean?”
“It means you deserve someone to fuck you like you need. Look at you.”
This was not the first time Dieter said nonchalant, wildly sexy things to you like he was talking about the weather. It was, however, the first time they’d been directed at you. He was a whole ocean away, but your body reacted like he was right there.
“If you were my girl, I’d never leave you unsatisfied,” he said quietly. “I’m a fuck up, but I can do that.”
“Dieter—” You said, but he cut you off. Which was good, because you weren’t sure what you wanted to say. Stop? You didn’t want this? Because that was a lie.
“You wanna know what I’d do if I were there right now?”
You did.
“Yeah,” you breathed. 
“Let me see what you’re wearing.”
Oh my God, what is happening?
“It’s just, you know. Pajamas.”
“Please?” 
It wasn’t special. Sleep shorts and an old baggy t-shirt—you weren’t anticipating showing off. But you balanced the phone on your nightstand and spread yourself out, chewing your lip. You weren’t a supermodel.
“Damn,” he said. Thanks to the earbuds, his voice was still snug in your ear, even if his face was a little farther away. “Fuck, you’re pretty.”
“Thank you,” you whispered. “You are, too.”
He gave you a soft, fond smile. 
“I’d make you feel so good, you know. I’d never let you go so long without cumming on my tongue—”
You let out an involuntary whimper, and his voice got huskier. 
“You want me to keep talking, sweetheart?”
“Yeah.”
He sounded like music, scratchy and soothing like an old record. 
“You look a little shy, baby. No need to be shy. You wanna know what I did before you called me back?”
“Mm,” you murmured, squeezing your thighs together. 
“I woke up so hard. Dreamed about you—I’m always dreaming about you, you know?”
No, you didn’t know. 
“You always look so pretty and sweet. Always listening to me even though… I don’t know what I’d do without you,” he babbled. Is he just high? He’s probably just high. “I had to get myself off before. Wanted to keep cool. Didn’t work.”
He gazed down, moving around on the little screen. “Shit, you make me so hard.” He paused and looked at you, face shiny and red. “You tell me to fuck off if you want, but…” He bit his lip, and it hit you—he was touching himself again. He was jerking off and talking to you and looking at you. “Do you wanna see how hard you make me?”
“Dieter,” you whispered, trying to get his attention. Because as much as you wanted this to happen, as much as you wanted to indulge in this fantasy, he wasn’t in his right mind. He was a handsome, famous actor and you were just a girl who happened to be around. He caught your wrinkled brow and stopped. Even through the phone’s pixelated representation of what must be the most beautiful face in the world, you saw the blush of his cheeks. 
“Everything okay?” He asked, going still. 
“I don’t know if this is a good idea,” you said. Regretfully, bitterly. 
Dieter was so quiet. His lips were parted slightly, eyes narrowed in comprehension. So you waited and waited and waited for what was most likely all of five seconds until he uttered sheepishly, “I made you uncomfortable, sweetheart?”
“No,” you said quickly. “It’s not that I’m uncomfortable. I’d just rather you be…fully present.”
He cocked his head to the side like this is the first time he’s ever heard anyone say anything of the sort. “Oh.”
You’d never met a man who handled rejection well, even when you gave a perfectly good explanation, and you braced yourself for an insult that never came. There was a rustling of clothes as he, you assume, put his dick back in his pants. Dieter cleared his throat. 
“So,” he said. “You liked my painting, though?”
Your limbs relaxed, fists unclenched, the tension in your jaw releasing as he moved past it. 
“I really do,” you said.
** 
She wanted him to enjoy it. She wanted him to remember it. 
He wanted to remember it, too. 
Filming finally—finally—came to an end. One thing was for sure—he was never working with Darren fucking Eigen ever again. That whole studio can go to hell, as far as he was concerned.
Dieter wanted to tell her everything that had happened.
He wanted to see her reactions, he wanted to hear her laugh, and he wanted to be present. He wanted her.
“Guess what?” He asked, grinning, fully sober for the first time in weeks. 
“What?” She asked. She was getting ready for bed as usual, Delilah barking in the background. He wants to meet Delilah, too. 
“We’re done! The movie’s over!” 
She squinted, looking over his shoulder. “Is that a different hotel?”
Where did he even begin?
“Yeah, we—yeah. I’m in London. It’s been crazy, but it’s okay because I’m done!”
She said nothing for a minute, and he wondered if they’d lost connection. “That’s great,” she said weakly, forcing a smile. “I’m so happy for you! I know it’s been rough.”
She was rote, mechanical—forced. She was lying. 
“What’s wrong?” He asked, brute forcing his way through to her. 
“Nothing, really. Nothing,” she said. “I’m just tired.”
He didn’t believe her, not really, but she wouldn’t give him anything else. It was like the light had gone out of her eyes. 
“Hey,” he said, getting to the real point. “Listen, I want…I wondered if you wanted to visit me. After I get home.”
Delilah barked again. 
“I—really?” She asked, her mouth open. Shocked. 
“Of course really,” he said. 
“When?”
“When can you fly to LA?”
“I really don’t have money to fly—”
“I’m obviously going to pay for your trip,” he said, impatience creeping into his tone. “Just tell me when. My assistant handles all my air travel shit so I’ll tell her and she’ll send you an email with the details.”
She was quiet again, eyes shinier than when the call started.
**
The day you arrived, Dieter had back-to-back emergency meetings with his agent and publicist and manager to talk about the disaster that was the Cliff Beasts 6 production. He apologizes profusely, promising he’d be home as soon as he possibly can. 
“Just make yourself at home,” he said, voice crackling over the phone. “I have plans for you.”
“For me?” You asked. 
“Mmhmm.”
Make yourself at home. Easier said than done.
After you got off the phone with Taylor to confirm you were, in fact, alive and to remind her Delilah needed to be walked three times a day or she’d tear up whatever area she happened to be in, you took a leisurely tour of this biggest house you’d ever been in. It was less of a bachelor pad than you’d imagined. The exterior screamed Mid-Century modern with just a touch of industrial. He had far too many bedrooms and even more bathrooms, and as you wandered the halls waiting for him, you found a gym and spa, complete with a massage table and salon chair. You also found a sauna connected to the spa, and a very tiny room with what looked like pink Himalayan sea salt on the walls. It was huge and beautiful and open, and all the furniture and decor were perfectly placed. 
It didn’t feel like a house anyone had ever lived in.
Upstairs was a little different. Surrealist paintings dotted the walls, all similar enough for you to piece together that they were by the same artist, and in the right-hand corner on every one you saw “D.B.” scribbled in tiny letters. There were at least a dozen of them, each one stranger than the next, and they all felt like him.
He told you to pick a guest room, any of them was fine. You were still opening doors to find them all when you stumbled into what had to be the owner’s suite. The California king bed faced an oversized floor to ceiling glass door that opened to a patio overlooking downtown Los Angeles. The en suite bathroom was as large as the bedroom. 
It was completely overwhelming. 
But his bedroom was full of knick knacks and paint tubes and brushes. Against the wall lay a large, unfinished canvas. A bong sat neatly on a little table near a small couch. 
His sanctum. 
“Hey, peach.”
A warm, scratchy voice that you’d only ever heard through a speaker came from behind and you froze in place. He was going to think you were snooping and kick you out for snooping and that would be well within his rights because you were definitely snooping.
You turned slowly, and not just because of the anticipation of being in trouble, but because now he’d know you were real, and he was real, and then where do you go from there? 
But you faced him regardless, and he looked like sunshine. He was grinning, bobbing up and down on his feet, arms spreading open like he was going to hug you. 
He was going to hug you. 
He was next to you in a flash, arms thrown around you with enthusiasm you hadn’t expected. Dieter didn’t strike you as a hugger. 
You stood dumbly for a moment until you remembered your arms work and you should probably hug him back. He was solid and warm and smelled like coconut oil. 
“You’re real,” he whispered, and tears pricked the corner of your eyes because yes, you were both real and he was still happy to see you.
Dieter pulled back and look you up and down. For a moment you swore his eyes dropped to your lips, but he moved away. It occurs to you that you’ve spent the last few months conversing with a talking head. The most you’d seen of him over FaceTime was his torso and that had been—well, it had only been once. 
And sure, you’d seen plenty of him in movies and photoshoots, but you’d never seen him. Your eyes scanned him, taking in the full breadth of his shoulders covered in a faded blue t-shirt, soft and worn under your fingertips. You itched to touch the curve of his soft stomach. 
“Yep, I’m real,” you said, shaking your head clear of absolutely ridiculous thoughts. “Sorry, I didn’t mean to snoop—”
“I don’t care,” he said, interrupting you. “Open book. And you’re the guest of honor.”
He took your hand and pulled you out to the hall. “Oh, I haven’t picked a room,” you explained, feeling very silly when you realized you’d been hauling your suitcase around the house with you. 
“Leave it here for now,” he shrugged, pointing to a spot next to his bed. “We have plans.”
**
She was in his bedroom. 
Well, near it, anyway. She was on the balcony, forearms resting on the safety railing as she leaned over to take in the view of the Los Angeles skyline. He bought the place just for that view, but she’d made it better. He’d seen hundreds of pictures of her, but when she turned around with her mouth all slack, sheepish at getting caught in his room, it was clear cameras did her no justice at all. 
She was soft in his arms, warm and inviting, and he wanted to kiss her. The only thing that stops him is the hazy memory of rejection. 
“What plans?”
He grinned.
**
He’d had grander plans, plans that involved five-star restaurants and parties and clubs, but the pandemic, despite everyone’s best efforts, raged on. Dieter was forced to scale down, but he could still give her the star treatment. 
The first night was dinner prepared by a private sushi chef followed by movies in the mini theater. She fell asleep on his shoulder, and he stayed like that until she woke up and jumped away from him, stammering some apology. He didn’t mind it, though. While she slept he memorized the contours of her cheekbones and the curve of her bottom lip. 
She always complained about her neck. It was stiff, it was sore, she typed too much, she’s hunched over a desk. Regular desk work sounded fucking horrible, and he had no intention of ever finding out just how horrible or what it involved, but he wanted to give her some relief from it.
Anders came once a week to loosen knots in his lower back and shoulders. The guy didn’t look like an Anders, and Dieter suspected his name was really something like Jason or Tim, but he understood the appeal of a stage name. As long as Anders kept him loose, Dieter didn’t give much of a shit what he called himself. 
“I have a guest this week,” Dieter said, voice low over the phone. Anders agreed to bring what Anders called “his apprentice”—Dieter was unaware that there were apprentices in massage therapy, but again, he didn’t care as long as they got the work done. The apprentice’s name was Johanna, and her fingers dug harder into Dieter’s flesh than Anders’. 
Anders was perfectly professional, skilled fingers and palms remaining completely appropriate as he worked his way up her legs. If she noted discomfort, Anders pulled back. There was nothing flirtatious about it. 
However.
Anders reached the base of her neck, spreading his fingers to knead at her shoulders. “You’re very tight,” he said, and she let out a nervous giggle. 
“It’s my work, you know?” 
“I see this a lot. We’ll get you fixed up,” he assured her. She sighed, and he hits something in her that pulled the smallest, sweetest moan from her lips. Dieter  balled his fists, his body seizing up, heat flushing up his neck and ears. Johanna stopped.
“Is it too much?” She asked. 
“Nope,” he said through clenched teeth. “Not at all. Harder, if you want.”
He needed a damn distraction. 
Afterward, Dieter’s hands were shaking. He was going to be sore for days, but at the very least the blood rushing through his ears prevented any of those little noises from invading. 
She stretched her arms over her head, no doubt basking in her loose muscles. “Could we go swimming?” She asked, not paying a bit of attention to Anders as he gathered his belongings. 
His heart lightened a little.
**
You started to relax, and you didn’t even mind the lecherous gaze he gave you in your swimsuit.
Dieter did a cannonball from the balcony into the infinity pool below. When he came up, his face was contorted in pain.  
“Are you okay?” You asked, laughing so hard your stomach hurt.
“I need to be higher to do that,” he said, wincing as he swam over to you. He moved like he was made for the water. You raised your eyebrows. “What?” 
“I just didn’t expect you to swim so well,” you said. He made a face. 
“And why not?”
“I dunno. Just didn’t.”
“Are you calling me clumsy?”
“I said nothing,” you teased. 
“Because I’ll have you know,” he said, leaning back on the pool’s edge, spreading his arms wide. “I am a classically trained stage actor, and I’m very graceful.”
You giggled. “My mistake.” After a beat you asked, “Are you really?”
“Really what?”
“Classically trained?”
“No,” he said, laughing.
His broad chest glistened in the dying sun, water droplets clinging to his curly hair. All you wanted to do is swim over to him, wrap your legs around his waist, and bury your face in that chest. It occurred to you that he might let you; that he’d let you fall asleep on him last night, and hadn’t even tried to move you. 
It occurred to you that it’s been too long since you let yourself get lost in someone. 
“Would you ever have sex with me?” 
The question came out of nowhere, piercing your thoughts like a bullet. He was grinning, still, but there was a gleam of vulnerability in his eye. “Huh?” You asked, dumbstruck. 
“Would you ever have sex with me?” He asked again, smile falling a fraction of an inch. Heat crept up the back of your neck and between your thighs. It was like he’d read your mind. 
You swam to him slowly, coming to a halt directly in front of him. Twilight suited him well. 
“Do you want me to have sex with you?” You asked. 
“You gotta know the answer to that by now, peach,” he murmured. He leaned toward you and slid his big hands under your thighs, bringing your legs around him. “You gotta know I want you.”
You leaned in and kiss his collarbone, licking the salty skin. He let out a shaky breath. 
“We should get cleaned up, yeah?” You murmured. 
“Yes, ma’am. Whatever you want,” he breathed. 
You led him upstairs to his bedroom, dripping saltwater all over the smoothed cement floors. He didn’t seem to mind, intent on following you. 
The bedroom door clicked closed, and he darkened the smartglass. You press your lips against his, and he let out a soft, needy moan, plush lips so pliant and willing under your own. 
“Let’s take a bath,” you said. He chased your lips as you pulled away, and his whine of protest made you cup his jaw and kiss him again. “I’m not going anywhere. I’m staying right here.”
He sighed and nuzzled against you. “Okay,” he murmured, and the relief in his tone broke your heart. He turned on the tap and faced you. “Can I undress you?”
“I love how you ask,” you said. You’d expected him to take what he wanted, and you delighted in your mistake. “Yes, you may.”
He stared at you, swallowing hard as he took in your naked body. You could see the outline of his cock through his wet shorts. He wiggled them off, and you bit your lip. Because of course he had a huge dick. Of course.
You got in first, and pulled him between your legs. He leaned his head back onto your shoulder and sighed. “You feel nice,” he said.
“So do you.”
“What can I do?” He asked. 
“Shh,” you murmured. “I get the feeling you do a lot of the doing, yeah?” He nodded, and you slipped your hands down his torso. His cock jumped as you got further down, cupping his balls and reveling in the whimper you pulled from him. You brought your other hand around to wrap around his cock, tugging up and down lightly, just enough to tease. 
“Fuck,” he said through his teeth. “Peach, baby, I can—I can take care of you. You can use me however you want.”
“This is how I want,” you whispered in his ear. “I want you to feel good.”
You moved your fist faster, and he squirmed under you. “Okay,” he breathed. “Okay.” Head back, neck fully exposed, mouth rounded in sweet surprise. He looked like a painting, lost in pleasure. 
“I don’t wanna use you,” you murmured, pressing kisses to his sinewy neck and sharp jaw. His warm, hard length, slick with water and pre-cum, pulsed in your grip. He opened his eyes and whimpered. 
“I—I’ve been thinking of you for so long,” he said. You said nothing, steadily pumping him as he confessed. “Since—fuck, that feels good—since forever. It feels like forever. All I think about is eating your pussy. I haven’t—haven’t wanted anyone else.”
That could not possibly be true.
“I want my tongue buried in your cunt,” he said, bucking himself in your hand. “And in your little asshole. I b-bet you taste like peach all over.” He turned into your neck with his tongue licking over your skin like he’s practicing. “You—you don’t understand—I fuck my hand thinking about you all the time. Oh, fuck. I fuck my hand, I fuck the stupid toys, I fuck my pillow, I fuck everything and all I—want—is—you.”
You let yourself entertain the belief that he’d been lusting over you this whole time as he grinds into your hand. “Shh, slow down, baby. Slow down,” you murmured. “Plenty of time for all of it.”
“No,” he whined. “Need to cum. Need to cum now. Your hand’s so fuckin’ soft and pretty.”
“Okay,” you cooed. “Okay, okay, then cum. Cum in my hand.”
“Thank you,” he groaned. “Oh, thank you so much. Thank you, thank you, thank you—”
He bucked his hips again, straining as his cock throbbed, his spend landing in the water. You kissed him, absorbing his whimpers and grinding yourself slightly on his lower back he’d pushed against your mound. “Good boy,” you murmured as he slumped down. 
Dieter looked at you with glassy eyes and gave a lop-sided smile. There was a brief, awful moment where your brain told you he’d kick you out now, but it was wrong. Dieter just kissed you, nuzzling your nose with his own. 
“It’s my turn, peach,” he said, and before you could protest he pulled you into the bedroom, rubbing your damp skin down with a towel and positioning you on the end of the bed, ass and hips hanging off the edge as he got on his knees and spread your legs. 
“Fuck,” he murmured. “Fuck, I think I’m already hard again.”
**
She was finally spread out in front of him, pussy glistening in the dim light, enticing him—it was so worth the wait. It was so, so worth it. He meant what he said—there was no one else. It was just her. There was a drawback, though.
“You’ll have to forgive me, peach. I’m a little out of practice here.”
“What do you mean?” She asked, leaning up on her elbows. 
“I haven’t been with anyone in months,” he said, and she looks at him with a raised eyebrow. 
“You—really? You’ve been back in L.A. for ages, right?” 
“I wanted you,” he said simply. And then he pressed his lips against her pussy, sliding his tongue up and down her lips. “I fucking knew it,” he said. “I fuckin’ knew you tasted divine. I fuckin’ knew I’d choose you for my last meal if they asked. I was fuckin’ right.” He groaned into her, spurred on by her breathy whimpers. She looped her fingers into his curls and tugged, pushing him forward. “That’s right, peach, you fuckin’ take what you need from me.” He pulled back and inhaled her musk, pushing one thick finger into her. She was warm and soaked, and he quickly found a spot he knew would make her breathless.
She was babbling above him, but he barely heard her, blocked by her soft thighs against his ears. Dieter couldn’t believe he’d gotten so lucky—he’d planned to wait, to play off the question as a joke. But she’d responded and he knew it was a sign.
“Oh, come on. Come on, peach, I can feel it. I can feel that little cunt ready to cum around my finger. Squeezing the fuck out of me. You want another one, baby?” He asked, and she nodded her head vigorously. 
“Please,” she said. He slid a second finger inside and her thighs shook. She was still a little tight, so rubbed circles inside of her as his tongue pressed against her clit. Her fingers tugged his hair harder, and she cries out as she clenched and throbbed around him. She looked like an angel.
“Dieter,” she sobbed. 
He worked her through it, rubbing until she batted him away, and he crawled up to kiss her forehead. Dieter had never said a word to anyone about how vulnerable he was in these precious seconds after he’s pleasured someone, how anxious he is to know he’s done a good job—he suspected he’s not subtle about it, either, but he’s never voiced it. 
“Good boy. That was so fucking good,” she said, like she could read his mind, and any insecurity he had melted away as he kissed her still-damp forehead, her eyes sparkling. 
“What now?” She asked. 
“I want you to ride me,” he said. 
“Dieter,” she said, and he knew what she meant. 
They acted on it, and now it’s not the same. Things are different. 
“We see where this goes? I still…still need to meet Delilah, you know?”
“To see if she approves?” She giggled, but looked away. “What if this doesn’t work?”
“What if it does, though? I haven’t…felt like this in a long time. You like me.”
“Of course I like you.”
“No, I mean—you’ve seen me just be me. And you like me.”
“Yeah, Dieter, I like you.”
“People don’t.”
“I’m not people. If anyone’s in danger of being found out it’s me,” she joked.
Dieter frowned. “What do you mean?”
“I just mean…I’m not, like, cool. I need attention. I need my needs met.”
“Do you…do you think I won’t do that?” He asked.
“It’s not that. Just that my needs are too much, you know?”
Dieter slid his hand up her naked torso, kneading her breast in his big hand. “Never. Never too much, peach.” She smiled. “Look, we’ll try it. I’ll fly out to see you. I’ll fly you in. We’ll do whatever. Maybe you become my little kept woman.” She shot him a glare. “Or not! I—there are ways. You were five thousand miles away and I didn’t care about anyone else.”
“Why? Why me?” She asked. 
He pulled his phone out and went to their DMs. 
“Remember when I answered you?”
“Yeah, it freaked me out,” she laughed.
“That was a bad day. Awful day. You made me laugh, and I don’t think anyone cared about me like that. Not once.”
He felt pathetic again, but she cupped his face in her hands. “You deserve that.”
“I don’t. I made a lot of shitty choices.” 
“But that’s the past, isn’t it?”
“Yeah,” he said, eyes watering. “Could you ever love me?” He rubbed his thumb across her cheek and hoping he hadn’t asked a stupid question. She cocked her head at him, and he was ready to take it back. 
“Of course,” she whispered, pulling his face to look directly into her eyes. “Of course I could.” 
He grinned, heart a million pounds lighter, and kissed her. Her lips opened at the soft prodding of his tongue, and she welcomed him into her mouth, sighing at the intrusion. 
“God, I wanna fuck you,” he murmured. She grinned against his lips.
“What’s the rush?” She asked. 
“I’m just impatient.”
She rolled him onto his back, kissing down up his neck. “Lucky for you,” she said, nipping his jaw, “So am I.”
2K notes · View notes
tulsajazz · 2 days
Text
Jazz In Pink Live at the Berks Jazz Fest's Sunday Jazz Brunch hosted by Michael Tozzi!
Location: DoubleTree by Hilton Reading Grand Ballroom Reading, PA DOORS OPEN AT 10:30 A.M. / BRUNCH AT 11:00 A.M. / CONCERT BEGINS AT 12:00 P.M. — ONE TICKET INCLUDES BRUNCH AND CONCERT Tickets: https://vivenu.com/event/brunch-jazz-in-pink-copy-copy-6c3whq JAZZ IN PINK featuring Gail Jhonson, Paula Atherton, Brooke Alford, Keyanna Hutchinson, Tiffani Walker Michael Tozzi, who first visited…
Tumblr media
View On WordPress
0 notes
soraontop · 1 month
Text
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
SORA TRIVIA
She auditioned at Cre.Ker Entertainment as a joke in 2015 with singing Adele’s Rolling in the Deep and dancing to BTS’ RUN, but was surprised when she was accepted.
Even before Produce 101, she’s always been a popular trainee— especially when her cover of Katy Perry’s Wide Awake went viral in 2014.
She has a Chihuahua named Miso that lives with her friend, the two adopted her in 2018 when they were roommates.
Her favorite idols have always been Lee Hyori, IU, SNSD, and Wonder Girls.
She is a huge Jujutsu Kaisen fan, fans have given her gifts from the show’s merch or handmade gifts.
Her Dark Moon character is named Lua, and she has the ability of invisibility and force-field manipulation.
In 2020, she left Cre.Ker Entertainment due to inconsistent promises on her debut and joined BigHit Entertainment (G)I-DLE’s Soyeon (though, just ‘a friend’ to the public’s knowledge) told her about how they were looking for female trainees for a co-ed survival show.
Her biological mother died in 2005, her brothers are all half-brothers and their mothers have either left or died.
She is not a PDA person at all, but she’s always sleeping with a teddy in her arms. (The boys do get jealous … of an inanimate object.)
She’s allergic to dogs and strawberries. Despite this, she still has a dog and eat strawberries.
Despite her closed off nature, not letting people in, she has a lot of idol friends.
Her hidden talent is that she can tie cherry stems into a knot with her tongue.
She is a brand ambassador for Gentle Monster and a global brand ambassador for Dior.
Old classmates of her have said she was well liked amongst staff and classmates alike, always willing to help with classwork and kind, encouraging words. She was also really easy to get along with.
She loves American artists like Taylor Swift, Olivia Rodrigo, Sabrina Carpenter, and 5SOS. She has a wide variety of taste in music, she even likes a bit of country.
She’s been a fan of 5SOS since 2013.
She shares a birthday with Jake’s dog, Layla.
She loves space and conspiracy theories.
Her favorite features on herself are her eyes and lips.
She is close with RIIZE’s Seunghan, LE SSERAFIM’s Kazuha and Yunjin, ITZY members, (G)I-DLE’s Soyeon and Shuhua, THE BOYZ members, IVE’s Yujin and Wonyoung, and her former I.O.I. members.
Fans found old photos of Sora and RIIZE’s Seunghan when they were younger and connected the dots, fans even spotting Sora in a hat and mask at RIIZE’s debut showcase. She then later confirmed it on a WeVerse Live.
Along with the entire group’s manager, Wooseok, she has her own female manager, Hyosun, as the company thought would be best for her to have a woman she could go to and not any men.
She was on a swim team when she was younger.
She’s not easily scared by horror films, and enjoys them as long as they make her jump.
She’s the most flexible in the group.
The members she talks to the most from I.O.I. are Somi, Doyeon, Yoojung, and Chungha.
She went to an international school as her father thought it’d be more beneficial for her future.
She made her acting debut in 2010 as Jung Somi in The Man From Nowhere, where won Best New Actress at the 2010 Korean Film Awards for her role. She also played Do Kyunghee, Cha Eunwoo’s character’s sister, in My Gangnam Beauty in 2018.
She loves spicy food but can only eat so much without something to drink.
She has a low alcohol tolerance, the members have to watch her when she’s drinking.
The members compare her to a cat, similar to Jungwon, with how she denies affection and then craves it.
It’s easy to be her friend, but it’s hard to get her to open up.
She finds it funny with how much she has to say an English word in a Korean accent for the others to understand sometimes. She finds it even funnier with Jake’s accent.
She chose Sunoo and Jungwon as the cutest members.
With Engenes, she finds their reaction when she flirts with them funny, but she also loves seeing their reactions when she ‘rejects’ someone (i.e. affection, fans asking her out, etc.) so she picks and choose how she responds to certain things.
After I.O.I. but before ENHYPEN, she had a YouTube channel named Sorabae where she posted make-up videos but the channel has been inactive since 2019.
She can play the piano, but hardly ever plays anymore.
Her persona in front of fans and her actual persona were very different for a while after debut. She didn’t know how to act in front of fans, especially after debuting as the only girl. She slowly started to get more comfortable around fans in the beginning of 2022.
For the majority of her career, including I.O.I., she had a ‘Golden Girl’ image until she gradually changed and allowed herself to let go of things. ENHYPEN have hinted towards this, saying how much she’s opened up to them and more comfortable. She’s also often said how she’s no longer the same girl.
She likes teasing fans more than feeding into delusions, flirting with them and taking it back with a joking snarky comment or saying a comment that had a double meaning and acting as if she had no idea what she said really meant.
She has a small appetite and always ends up giving the rest of her meals to her members.
Her favorite drink is a mocha frappuccino.
Out of everyone, she probably keeps most of her personal life to herself from the fans.
Her favorite dessert is cheesecake.
She prefers fall weather over the summer.
Along with Jay, she cooks the most in the dorm which she doesn’t mind.
She hates waking up early, but she does it to make sure everyone eats.
In an old middle school picture of her on a field trip, Sunoo is seen photobombing behind her with a peace sign.
She knew Heeseung, Jay, and Jungwon before debut as they were all trainees under BigHit.
She was best friends with a fellow trainee and contestant on I-Land, Lim Chaeyeon. The two were both expected to debut in the final line-up until Chaeyeon was eliminated in the last episode, leaving Sora (and Iseul before she left) the only girl(s) in ENHYPEN. This has started rumors of I-Land being rigged, especially with how seemingly neither girls talk anymore.
Both of her upper and lower lobes and her antitragus are pierced, as well as her left industrial and right helix. She plans on getting her right industrial done when her first is finished healing in a few months. She also wants to get her belly button pierced.
She thinks “tattoos are sexy.” (Dark Blood Fancall 230530)
If she wasn’t an idol, she’d probably have a career in the medical field.
reply to join taglist!
87 notes · View notes
nhlclover · 1 year
Text
the moment i knew | trevor zegras
Tumblr media
word count: 1.24k
summary: it’s your birthday but your boyfriend doesn’t show.
warnings: angst, crying
notes: based on ‘the moment i knew’ by taylor swift. my first post and it’s angst lol i promise they won’t all be like this.
I walked up the front steps of my friend's house, the house seeming a little too quiet. It was just before 8 pm on the night of my 21st birthday, and my friend was hosting a small party for me with our friends. It was pretty obvious, however, that it was going to be a big party with a bunch of people. I knock on the door and hear a little bit of shuffling before the door swings open, revealing my friend.
“Happy birthday, y/n!” she cheers, bringing me in for a hug.
“Thank you, Lily.” I smile, stepping into the house, and shutting the door behind me. As I do so, dozens of people jump out from behind furniture and from behind walls, shouting a blend of surprises and happy birthdays. I pretend to be shocked, plastering a fake surprise look on my face.
“Oh my gosh, you did this for me?” I ask.
“You knew didn’t you?” she asks, sighing.
“I’m sorry it was a little obvious.” I chuckle. “But I appreciate it so much, thank you, Lily.”
I greeted some other friends who all wished me a happy birthday. When the flow of people slowed, I realized one person was missing from the group.
“Where’s Trevor?” I asked Lily, inquiring about my boyfriend's presence, or lack thereof.
“I think he’s coming a little later.” she replies, her voice sounding unsure. “The ducks' game only ended like, 30 minutes ago. Don’t worry, y/n, he said he’d be here.”
I nod, accepting the explanation. She was probably right, after all. He would have to shower after the game and get dressed. I expel a sigh of relief and accept a drink being handed to me by another friend. I engage in conversation with friends I haven't seen in months, people asking me how I’ve been, though I’m only half present in the conversations as I keep one eye on the door, waiting for him to walk through. 
An hour passed and he still hadn’t shown. I was only able to forget about it for a few minutes before I let my mind wander, recalling how much effort I had put into my look that night. I had worn a pink silk mini dress that had a slight cow-neck; the exact dress Trevor had told me looked amazing on me when I bought it two weeks prior. I had done a bit more makeup than normal, deeming that it was a special occasion, and done my hair in soft curls.
Finally, the door opens, and I see Mason and Jamie walk in, but see Trevor not with them. They spot me and come up to me. 
“Happy birthday, y/n!” they say simultaneously. 
“Thanks, guys.” I smile back, hugging them both. “Is Trevor with you?”
Mason and Jamie exchange confused looks. “Uh, no. We came straight from the arena. He said he needed to stop by the house first.” Jamie shrugged.
“Oh.” I falter. 
“I’m sure he’s just changing or something.” Mason recovered, hoping to save my hopes. “He said he’d be here.”
Hours passed and my boyfriend had yet to walk through the door, no matter how intently I looked at it. I had spent all my energy pretending that nothing was bothering me, entertaining the people that were there to celebrate me. My social battery was almost empty and my emotions were starting to rise to the surface. I excused myself from the current conversation I was trapped in, as I walked down the hallway, finding the bathroom and locking myself inside it. Just as tears threaten to spill from my eyes, a knock on the door forces me to keep them in.
“Occupied!” I choke out, fanning my eyes.
“Y/n… It’s Jamie and Mason.” I hear Jamie’s soft voice say from the other side of the door. His sad tone threatens the dam that’s keeping my tears back. 
I unlock the door, opening it. Their soft expressions are what pushes me over the edge, as tears start to fall from my eyes. Jamie catches me in an embrace as my knees give out, sobs engulfing my body. He holds me up as I keep my arms wrapped around his shoulders. Mason steps in, shutting the door behind him so I can cry in private. They don’t say anything as they let me expel my emotions. Finally, I pull back from Jamie, wiping my tears off my scarlet cheeks, when another knock comes at the door. My false sense of hope spikes, as I think momentarily that Trevor finally showed up, however, it falls when I hear Lily’s voice.
“Y/n? Are you okay?” she asks. I nod at Mason to open the door.
He does so, revealing my puffy and red face, with my birthday makeup slipping off. “Oh, y/n.” she winces.
The pity in her voice only makes me feel worse as I break down again, this time in her arms. “He said he’d be here.” I wept. 
As it was nearing 1 in the morning, Lily decided to send everyone home. She gave me a spare change of clothes, not wanting to send me back to my apartment alone tonight. Jamie and Mason were the last to leave, also hesitant to leave me alone.
“Are you sure you’re okay?” Jamie asked.
“Yeah, I’ll be okay. I’ve got Lily here. Don’t worry about me.” I force a smile.
“Sleep well, y/n.” Mason said. “And trust us, we’ll kick his ass whenever we see him next.”
I chuckled softly at his comment, thanking them both as they walked to the car before getting in and driving home. I totter over to the guest bedroom, tucking myself in and letting myself drift off to sleep, which proved easy to do after my emotions had worn me down. 
When I awoke, the mid-morning sun cut through the blinds casting a soft glow on the room. I rubbed at my tender eyes, the remaining makeup from the night before that hadn’t been washed away by my tears coming off on my knuckles. The bedside clock reads 11:03. I look around for my phone, but don’t see it. I slide out of the sheets, making my way to the kitchen where I see it on the table.
I pick it up and turn it on, seeing the lock screen flooded with a myriad of notifications, spotting Mason’s text asking me how I was doing at the top. A few notifications down I spot my boyfriend's contact name covering the next few spots. I had missed a series of text messages and phone calls that had come in that morning from him.
Trevor y/n I’m so sorry my love
Trevor I knocked out after the game and slept all the way until this morning
Trevor Baby please answer my calls I'm so sorry
I sigh, seeing he had texted me about 5 more times and called about 5 more. Hesitantly, I clicked on his number. The phone rang twice before I heard his voice come through the phone.
“Y/n?” he asked softly. 
“Hi.” I croaked out.
There was a beat of silence as I could tell Trevor was considering what to say first.
“I’m sorry I didn’t make it.” 
Tears begin to spill onto my cheeks as the emotions of last night come to the forefront of my mind.
"I'm sorry too." I say softly.
462 notes · View notes
tv-moments · 2 years
Photo
Tumblr media
Mayor of Kingstown
Season 1, “The Price“
Director: Ben Richardson
DoP: Maya Bankovic
8 notes · View notes
feralforfrank · 2 years
Text
JEALOUSY, JEALOUSY.
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
BRADLEY "ROOSTER" BRADSHAW X FEM!READER
summary (loosely based on jealousy, jealousy by olivia rodrigo.) rooster and you have never liked each other. or rather—you haven't admitted it you like each other. one night at the hard deck is enough to change the dynamic between you.
cw ANGSTY ANGST, unrequited love, reader comparing herself, mention of reader almost losing control of her plane, rooster being kind of an asshole to reader when they were younger. enemies to lovers (and everything that comes with it; angst, fluff, etc.) NON-DESCRIPTIVE READER.
a/n reader's callsign is swift. i dont know if im going to put it on the next part (if i make a next part hehe) so i'm explaining her callsign here. she listens to a lot of taylor swift but shes also really swift/quick in the air. ALSO, this is my first time writing for tg:m, fingers crossed people read and interact with it!
masterlist | taglist
Tumblr media
Bradley "Rooster" Bradshaw was annoying, and you hated him. Yeah, you despised him. All you two have ever done is argue and (passive-aggressively) insult each other.
So, why were you red from jealousy watching him flirt with one of Nix's friends?
Okay, maybe you lied. Maybe, you have had this massive crush on Rooster since you joined the Naval Academy. He was charming, funny and intelligent, not to mention hard-working and efficient. He was four years older than you and usually hung out with the older students.
All you could do was admire him from afar. Admiration turned into liking, which later developed into something more than a crush. But you never told anyone—you'd be crazy to do so. You've never even spoken to each other.
Until one night changed everything. 
You don't remember much from the night. One of your acquaintances was throwing a party, and after a particularly hard day, you'd decided to join your friends.
You were having fun until you weren't. You hated dividing people into stereotypical categories like people did in high school, but bullies exist wherever you go. In that case, even in the Naval Academy.
The guy was drunk, and so was half of his friend group. You don't even remember what he was making fun of you because all you could focus on was him. Bradley Bradshaw was part of that friend group, and—it might've been the alcohol talking—but he was checking you out.
He'd finally noticed you.
After that party, he paid more attention to you. But not the kind of attention you wanted. It started with small jokes about your ability to fly a plane. Sometimes you'd chuckle at them, for his jokes were creative and funny.
But he didn't stop there. You quickly realised he wasn't laughing with you but at you. It hurt you, but your crush towards him didn't disappear as you'd like. It grew stronger.
So, you stopped entertaining him and his friends. You couldn't understand why he kept making jokes that turned into insults when he knew you wouldn't react to them. 
It was a stressful day for you when you finally burst. You were training in the air, and you'd gotten paired against Rooster. He was throwing passive-aggressive jabs throughout the exercise, resulting in you nearly losing control of the plane. You'd gotten off your seat so fast, yelling at him for almost getting you killed.
From that point on and forward, all you two did was argue. Argue over the smallest of things. Were you at the top of the class? Rooster beat you when the next test came around. Were you planning on going to a bar? Rooster was there to ruin your night.
It was so much worse now that you were in Top Gun. You felt the obligation to look and be better than good, not only in front of him but to the rest of the men. Women in the Navy were rare, and you'd fuck Rooster up if he'd try to ruin the reputation you fought so hard to gain.
Despite your dislike of his behaviour towards you, you could never shake off the butterflies you got when he walked into a room or the blush coating your cheek every time he addressed you by your callsign.
You just wished—just for a minute—that he could look at you differently. You didn't want his glaring or snarky comments, but the charming smile he gave everyone when he entered the Hard Deck and the attention he paid to Nix's friend—what was her name again? Maria?
"If you keep glaring at them like that, people might start getting ideas," Phoenix whispered in your ear, and you could hear the smirk in her voice.
"Just lost in thought, Nix. I'm not looking at them."
Co-comparison is killing me slowly.
Her hair was smoother and silkier than yours. You could see how healthy and shiny it looked, even across the room, whereas yours was tired from being on a tight bun all day.
Her clothes fit her amazingly. Tight shorts and a white crop top highlighted her cleavage and perfect tan. You, on the other hand, had opted for a baggier pair of shorts and a Hawaiian button shirt that Rooster had teased you for having. I know you want to be like me, baby, but this is going too far. God, you wished he would comment on it now.
I'm so sick of myself.
I'd rather be, rather be,
anyone, anyone else.
Jealousy, Jealousy.
You'd rather be anyone else at this moment. You couldn't bear to watch the pair laugh, talk and for Rooster to completely ignore your presence. You were so used to having him around you, throwing insults, commenting on your appearance and getting red when you threw snarky comments back.
I wanna be you so bad, and I don't even know you.
You wanted to be her. Listen to the enchanting way he spoke and watch as he moved his hands around while explaining or narrating a story. You wanted to be the centre of his attention, the reason he was smiling. The urge to punch him was still there, but the fucking fluttering in your stomach was overpowering it.
She was so beautiful—you don't even think she was trying. Her smile and her posture. The way she held her beer, how she leaned on Bradley when she laughed, or how she lightly hit his shoulder when he teased her. Everything was perfect. This Maria girl was flawless—and you hated it.
All I see is what I should be.
Happier, prettier, jealousy, jealousy!
All I see is what I should be.
I'm losing it. All I get's; jealousy, jealousy!
I have to stop, you think. You have to look away. The staring is getting creepy, and your self-esteem drops significantly each second that passes. Jealousy courses through your veins along with the remnants of your beer. 
You decide that's enough sulking. You came to the Hard Deck to drink and have fun with your friends. Rooster can go fuck himself. Or better yet, fuck the pretty blonde currently hanging off his arm.
"Where've you been all night, Swift?" You hear Coyote call you, as you approach the pool table.
"Here and there!" You shout over the loud chatter.
You watched as Hangman tried to get the pool ball in the socket but missed terribly, and suddenly the lightbulb above your head turned on. You had a terrible idea. The alcohol, combined with the jealous feeling running through you, gave you the push you needed to execute it.
"Hey, Hangman. Let me show you how to win this thing." You said as Fanboy shot the ball right into the socket.
You approached him, grabbing the pool stick and calling him behind you, and you set your hips at the right angle, your hands finding the right spot on the stick before calling him to come behind you. He placed his hands on yours, his body flush against yours. 
Right before you hit the ball, you look in the direction of Rooster. Maria is talking excitedly, but he's not paying attention to her. His eyes are fixated on you, and you find yourself smirking. Why are you smirking? He could have been glancing around, and you just accidentally caught his eye. That might've been the case, but the way he's glaring at the man leaning above you says otherwise. 
Is Bradley "Rooster" Bradshaw...jealous?
That'll teach him for flirting with another girl.
With precise movements, the ball is inside the socket, and you both cheer, high-fiving. "Yeah! That's how you do it, baby!"
You turn to his direction again, wanting to savour his reaction but what you see is more than enough to break your heart into tiny pieces. Bradley is kissing Maria. And it's not just a peck on the lips but a full-blown make-out session in the middle of the bar. And your heart breaks, just like when you realised he was laughing at you with his friends.
Your eyes tear, and you look down to avoid anyone spotting them. You look at your watch—23:17. You blink rapidly and look up, your eyes meeting Nix's worried ones.
Nix knew. She had caught you staring at him once too many times with that disgusting lovesick look in your eyes—her words, not yours. She'd pressured you until you finally caved in and told her about your infatuation with Rooster.
She looked concerned and apologetic, but it wasn't her fault. Maria wasn't at fault either. The woman was here to have fun—your stupid feelings had nothing to do with her. It wasn't her fault she happened to be extremely attractive and flirting with the pilot you hated but also wanted to fuck. Wow—that's a discussion for another time.
"I-I'll be going now. Good luck on your game, Hangman." You smiled at Jake, but it didn't reach your ears. 
You grabbed your bag from the chair next to the pool table, responding to anyone who said goodbye to you. You were halfway to the door when Nix caught up to you.
"Are you okay?" She asks, touching your shoulder gently.
You just nod, wanting nothing more than for your bed to swallow you. But of course, you can't have that. 
"Yo, Swift! Where are you going?!" Coyote's voice is loud enough to attract unwanted attention.
You open your slightly quivering lips, smiling as much as you can. "I'm tired from beating your ass all day in training today! I'm heading home."
"You didn't look tired to me a few minutes ago."
"Are you disrespecting a woman's choice, Coyote? While inside the Hard Deck?" Phoenix calls out, and the people who've gone quiet oh at her comeback.
Your eyes unintentionally shift towards Rooster, but you immediately regret it and turn your gaze elsewhere. His arm is around Maria's waist, but he's looking your way with—is that a worried look he shoots your way? Nah, it can't be. But what if it is? I'm not looking back again.
"Hey, Penny! Coyote just disrespected a woman! Ring the bell, please!" Nix's voice brings you out of your thoughts.
The bell rings, and she nods at you. This is your perfect chance to slip out unnoticed. The crowd cheers at Coyote, and he's defeated yet smiling expression. You're out of the bar in seconds.
But your quick getaway is the reason you missed how Rooster's expression fell when you left his eyesight. Or how Maria's waist felt too cold to hold—so he let her go—and how his face twists into regret as soon as he finds Phoenix's glare fixating on him.
You missed the mumble that escaped his lips; "What have I done?"
Tumblr media
previous | next
1K notes · View notes