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#TW: Thanatophobia
cracklewink · 2 months
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Harmony Syndrome Part 5/5
The last chapter of my mlp infection AU! Thank you to everyone who followed along. Some final thoughts on my twitter @cracklewink if anyone's interested : )
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comic-art-showcase · 1 year
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Bruce by Chris Samnee
Batober prompt: Absence
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Pairing: Yandere!Mahito x Reader
SFW
Word Count: 1'129
Warnings: Yandere, Kidnapped reader, Talks about death and the afterlife, Mahito's experiments, Mahito is an asshole (but what else is new).
Additional Notes: Ya girl has Thanatophobia and therefore Reader does as well. Reader also does not believe in an afterlife here.
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“Why do you look like that?”
The question made you frown, attention shifting from the dripping water coming off the pipes above your head to Mahito’s crouched form beside your makeshift bed.
“Like what?”
“That,” he said, lifting a hand up and poking your cheek. You could feel the indent of his finger digging into your teeth. “You look like a sad wet dog.”
You were quick to smack his hand away, expression turning annoyed. “I’m fine.”
He tilted his head and you suppressed a sigh. Usually, you were quick to quip back at him with something you thought was clever, like his comment being something every woman wanted to hear - spoken in your typical sarcastic tone.
You weren’t surprised that he’d find that kind of answer underwhelming.
“What is it?”
“It’s nothing.”
“Come on.” He dragged out the last word like a needy child, sprawling himself across your lap so you’d be forced to fully focus on him. “It’s obviously something.”
The sigh you finally gave in response held far more weight than you had wished. He grinned. “Nothing you can do anything about.”
He snorted. “Did I offer to do anything about it?” he poked your cheek again. “Tell me what’s going on in that little mind of yours.”
The slight twitch of your eye that followed betrayed the fact he had you exactly where he wanted. It made you sick just thinking about it.
“I’m just…” You chewed on your bottom lip for a moment as you looked away from him. “I can’t stop thinking about what happens… after.”
You could feel Mahito’s hair grinding between your thigh and the back of his skull as he shifted his head in your lap. “After?”
You gestured vaguely before looking back at him. “After we die.”
He blinked. “That’s it?”
The disappointment in his tone wasn’t surprising. It didn’t take a genius to figure out that the topic was either boring for him, or he just genuinely did not care. Regardless, it clearly wasn’t something that interested him in any form.
“You asked.”
“I did, I just didn’t expect it to be something so uninteresting.” He said as he sat back up, a small pout on his face.
You cringed at the confirmation of your thoughts, but anger quickly overtook the embarrassment.
“And you wonder why I don’t want to talk to you, you just make fun of me.”
“Then stop making it so easy.” He grabbed your jaw before you could turn your face away from him again. “Why are you wasting time on something so dull?”
“I can’t help it,” his lips twitched up at how petulant you sounded for a moment. “How can I after what I saw?”
His eyes widened in almost a madding form of glee as his face twisted to match the expression.
The macabre sight of his experiments was something that was burned in your mind forever. No matter how much you tried to scrub the events from your memory, you could not get the stain out. It was as permanent as those ghastly red stains on the walls and floor of the sewer he had dragged you into. As sick and gut-wrenching as the pleas for help from the ones who had enough mental capacity remaining to beg for death while your own words were caught in your throat.
And yet it made you wonder if that really would be a mercy because, to you, there was no afterlife. There was just… nothing.
And that terrified you almost as much as what Mahito was capable of.
“Awe, did that upset you?” He cooed, running his thumb along your cheek in a gesture that would be sweet if it wasn’t so condescending.
You smacked his hand away, teeth grinding as your anger came back up. “Fuck you.”
His giggles were like nails on a chalkboard. “Later, right now I wanna know if you’re gonna keep being a downer over something that happened days ago.”
“You can’t be serious.” The incredulous words left you before you could stop them because you knew he was. It was written all over him, without shame or reservation.
Sometimes you wondered if it was even possible for him to have any before you were reminded of the fact he was a Curse with each perverted expression of schadenfreude.
Your disgust coiled inside your gut like a parasite.
“So you are.” he let out a puff of air that blew a few of his shorter blue strands away from his face. “They’re going to die no matter what, what does it matter to you if they go to heaven or whatever fairy tale you humans like to believe in?”
“Because I want to know if I’m going to end up the same as them or not.”
There was a shift in his expression once you said that. Gone was the usual childish glee, replaced temporarily with god-awful authenticity.
“You’re not going to.”
He said it with such conviction that it made you laugh for a moment.
“I don’t believe you.”
You decided at that moment that Mahito’s frowns were far worse than any of his smiles could ever be as he looked at you directly in your eyes.
He stayed like that for a little while. Silent. Analyzing.
Then his eyes gleamed. “You’re scared.”
Of course you were. “No.”
“Yes, you are, don’t be silly.” He got in your face again, amused. “Your eyes don’t lie, I can see your soul trembling.
You shoved him away. He let you. “Why are you so afraid of something that’s inevitable?”
“Yes, how foolish of me to fear the end of my own existence and the destruction of everything I was and ever will be.” The words were bitter as you spoke them, eyes narrowing.
He snickered. “There’s no point to birth and death. It’s only your meaningless attachment to life that makes it terrifying, you know.”
You could only scoff, unable to come up with anything to say in response to that. You returned your gaze to the pipes, completely appalled.
When you failed to say anything after several minutes he sighed and crouched in front of you once more. “If it’s any consolation, I’m not going kill you.”
His hands cupped your cheeks as he brought his face about an inch away from yours. “If you somehow died, I still would not let that be the end of you.” His tone shifted into a sincerity that caught you off guard. “Your physical body would be gone for the time being, yes, but I’d still have your soul.” His thumb brushed over your lower lip and he grinned for what felt like the millionth time. “And that’s something I intend to keep around for a very… very long time.”
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© absolute-flaming-trash 2023. Do not repost, modify, copy, or claim.
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v1model · 5 months
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merge
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themogaidragon · 8 months
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Thanatophobia Pride Flag
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[IMAGE ID: a flag with five horizontal stripes with the central one being bigger. Their colors are, from top to bottom, grey, brown, white, grey and dark green. In the center of the flag there is a dark brown symbol of a skull. END ID]
[IMAGE ID: a flag with five horizontal stripes with the central one being bigger. Their colors are, from top to bottom, grey, brown, white, grey and dark green. END ID]
Thanatophobia: irrational fear of death. Can also be called death anxiety.
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starryoak · 1 year
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It’s bizarre to hear anyone talk about their experiences with their mortality or whatever, like, when they first conceived of death as a thing that could happen to Them Specifically, or like, when they started thinking about death more, and they mention like, their teen years, or their twenties, or their thirties, and I just… fundamentally cannot relate, because I first started conceiving of my own mortality when I was like 5 and my grandma died of brain cancer. My parents got me a book for children that had entirely developmentally appropriate information on what death was and how to process it, of course it brought up all the important stuff like that everybody dies and death is normal and all that shit, but as we were atheists and the book was also, presumably, for atheists, when it discussed what happens after you die it mentioned that some people believe that nothing happens after you die, IE; you just stop existing. And unfortunately, even at that age, I actually was entirely capable of understanding that “everybody dies eventually” also applied to me, and I put this together with the second bit of information that the book taught me, the concept of cessation of existence, and developed a lifelong crippling trauma.
Admittedly, it didn’t hit me in full force until my OCD got really severe in late elementary early middle school, but the idea of like, not having spent every night for years lying awake in crippling terror so severe it caused me actual physical burning pain over the fact that I have a finite ever decreasing time on Earth that even now is constantly ticking down with no way to stop it and no way to avoid it, and that in full likelihood that there’s nothing after death and there’s no afterlife whatsoever? It’s just hard to imagine for me. 
Like, I would literally just sit there counting down seconds thinking about how every second I get closer to death. I still get kind of triggered by counting numbers manually in general, because it so easily ties into a realization I had that I could easily go find a calculator for the average human lifespan in days and just count down the days until I die, and I just can’t imagine how anyone spends their life at least not a little terrified of that fact, the shortness of the human lifespan and how finite and entirely realistically countable that it actually is.
Even now that I’m mostly over it, I’m only mostly over it because I’m able to ignore it and get on with my day, rather than actually have come to terms with it, I just push the thoughts away whenever they come till the next time they come. I guess it’s just entirely baffling to me, to hear people talk about how they never processed their mortality as a kid, or how they just started thinking about it now that they turned 30, or almost anything about how most people talk about it in general, just because the idea of living your life not haunted by the omnipresent spectre of your own mortality is so completely foreign to how I’ve lived my life in complete and utter terror of how finite it is.
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rongrii · 4 months
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thanatophobia crumbs ?🙏
(also, as someone whos working on an au themself, do you have any tips for the writing process?)
Sure! Have some info:
There no illusion discs in this au; nightmares that Evan(CC) sees are not real. How did Michael see them? When ghost haunts a person some part of their memory transfers to someone they haunt.
AU ends on fnaf 6, Henry and OMC are the same person. Because Henry was not holy he suffers his own form of punishment.
Toy and Funtime animatronics(excluding Baby) are not possesed. Also, Toys even before they got reprogrammed by William they had bad face recognition technology, but Fazbear Entertainment didn't really care.
William firstly talked to Charlie, comforting her, and only after that got behind the corner and then killed Charlie.
Child ghosts don't target children; they don’t remember who killed them but remember an adult figure they followed. Hiding behind a mask would save you, like it did in fnaf 2
Thats all I want to tell rn! I like that you got interested
As to how to write your own au, you should focus on key points this au will change. If you are writing fnaf au, it can be hard because of games messy timeline. Be not afraid to change and simpilfy some points of the story if you need to!
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melanch0ly-gh0st · 10 months
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I’ve heard from people that when the world around them isn’t exposed to religion, they’re a lot less… afraid of death.
Death anxiety for me is crippling. Every time death is mentioned in any serious capacity, I get this ping in my gut, like my stomach isn’t there. It’s louder than most of my thoughts, and knowing how little emotional stimulation I receive, that’s incredibly dangerous. But then I go and talk to my friends of people on this site and they talk about how they or their friends weren’t exposed to religion the way I was- receiving a non-secular education, being made to believe that an almighty will torture me for eternity if I don’t love it, etc- have less of a fear for death or for talking about it. Suffering and fighting for your life aren’t as taboo as it is for me. People speak openly about it, they justify the pain they feel and talk about fighting back against it.
So I wanted to ask, if anyone that sees this was religious and became atheist after some time or was atheist for their entire life, can you reblog, reply, send a message or an ask, anything you feel comfortable with, talking about your perspectives on death? I would like to hear because I’ve been in an environment where God is the norm for so long, and I want to know if the pain I feel and the dread from death I get came from something more than brain waves.
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r04dk1lld0g · 4 months
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sometimes it feels like theres no point in doing anything because the ultimate truth is that im going to die. why start or finish anything, why experience shit, why go through pain and heartache and guilt and anger if im just gonna die? on the flip side though, experieincing the nice emotions is pretty cool. and the negative emotions have their own charm. i just sometimes w1sh it was easy to give up on myself, to just not do anything so i could fade away. so i could die, passively, without putting in any effort. but our bodies and brains arent made for that. they cant just let us die. so really living is selfish anyhow.
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icestar-74 · 10 months
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Shizaya Week 2023
Day 5 You're Pretty When you Cry
"Damn Izaya. I did not expect that ending." Shizuo shuddered. "It was like Inception but in your mind. Wait, Inception was sleeping and that's in your mind."
Izaya gave a small agreement and that's when Shizuo realized he had been too quiet.
They were watching a show that everyone had been talking about. Izaya loved the crazy things humans were up to in it. He found it fascinating. This was something else.
"Hey?" Shizuo turned to him. "Are you ok?"
Izaya was starring at the TV. When a single tear slid down his cheek Shizuo felt panic seize his heart.
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"Fuck." He tried to pull Izaya close. He noticed then the small shaking that was wracking Izaya's frame. "It's ok. It's all ok." Shizuo tried to get through.
Izaya then began to breath hard and sob. "Sh-sh-shiu-Shizuo." He choked out. "It's not it's not right. It's not right. It's not right."
"Shhhhhhhhh " Shizuo tried to hush him. "Everything is fine. You're here. In our living room. With me. It's all ok." He forced Izaya too look at him.
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Izaya shook his head violently. "N-n-no! It's gonna end. It's gonna end. I'm gonna end. I'm gonna end." His words tumbled out on repeat.
"Damn it." Shizuo wrapped his arms around him tight. "You're having a panic attack Izaya. It's ok. It'll pass. Just listen to my voice. Just be here with me. Focus."
Sobs ran through Izaya. He managed to get words out between each breath. "The helmet. He died. His mom. He said mom. It was short. It was long. He died. The game. Ended. But didn't end. It never ended. It didn't start. Nothing was real." It was a jumbled mess into Shizuo's shoulder.
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"Shhhhhh." Shizuo squeezed him tight. "You're ok."
After several minutes Izaya quieted down and eventually only shook every now and then. Shizuo had began to rub his back.
"I'm fine." Izaya sniffled. "You can let go." He took a deep shuddering breath. "How embarrassing."
Shizuo did let him go, but not far. He grabbed Izaya's hands and lifted them up in his own. Izaya glared at him, clearly wanting to escape.
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"Hey, there's nothing embarrassing about it. It happens." Shizuo growled softly. "Fuck." He wiped a tear from Izaya's eye. "Why are you so pretty when you cry?"
Izaya gave a small laugh. "No I'm not."
Shizuo grinned. "Yes you are. Don't tell me how to think." He stood up. "Wanna go to bed?"
Izaya nodded but didn't get up.
"C'mer." Shizuo leaned down to pick up Izaya. "You gotta start sleeping better flea. Lack of sleep fucks with your head too much."
"Isn't that why you're taking me to bed?" Izaya smiled slightly. "Unless you're taking me up for something else."
"How can you think about THAT at a time like this?!" Shizuo asked.
Izaya kissed his cheek. "Easy, it's one of the few things that make me feel better."
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comic-art-showcase · 1 year
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Kevin Conroy tribute by Damion Scott
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tw death )) Hey y'know the phrase "Nothing good happens after 2AM?" I'd like to reaffirm this. Had a freaking mental breakdown about my own mortality. Couldn't fall asleep "because someday I'll fall asleep and never wake up." What the hell do you mean by that, brain?
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sonysakura · 1 month
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Translation: MEANWHILE /i want to die\i don't want to die/i want to die\i don't want to die/i want to die\i don't want to die/ EVERYTHING IS JUST PEACHY
Apparently I've never posted this on Tumblr?? ✨QUALITY ART✨ dated 2019, remains pertinent
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themogaidragon · 8 months
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Cardiophobia Pride Flag
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[IMAGE ID: a flag with five horizontal stripes with the central one being bigger. Their colors are, from top to bottom, dark red, pastel red, white, grey and dark green. In the center of the flag there is a dark red symbol of a broken heart. END ID]
[IMAGE ID: a flag with five horizontal stripes with the central one being bigger. Their colors are, from top to bottom, dark red, pastel red, white, grey and dark green. END ID]
Cardiophobia: irrational and extreme fear of having an heart attack and heart diseases. It is a form of thanatophobia, the irrational fear of death.
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theinternetdemon · 1 month
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death anxiety is gonna kill me one day, no one knows whats beyond all of this and we're all walking towards a possible void of nothingness
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derschwabe08 · 2 months
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CW: Thanatophobia
Duty
Standing there forever watching,
The old and weary guardsman stands.
His duty kept him going
Through all those years of watch.
Gone are all his comrades now,
Fallen one by one.
Yet here he stands remembering,
And doing still as he was told,
For duty is his blood and soul.
Abandoning his post he dares it not,
For fear of what to others it might do.
But when he stands there all alone,
The wish is growing strong and stronger,
That someone else might take his place.
So he may leave and follow,
Those that left to sweetest rest so long ago
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