Tumgik
#TO THE POINT WHERE LIKE EVEN AFTER I MOVED ACROSS THE COUNTRY WITH MY NOW HUSBAND WE WERE KEEPING IN TOUCH
dollerines · 4 months
Text
Tumblr media
How I entered the void so easily after 1 year of trying
So after 1 year and half of trying to enter I finally did it and I am so mad because it REALLY IS SOOOOO EASY and tbh if in this post you are looking for any sort of validation or info you smart ass already know then please REMEMBER THIS : entering the void is extremely easy. You just have to do it in a way that resonates with you.
Personally for me since I had adhd I couldn’t just stay still and affirm for 1 or even a few for 10 mins. Not just because I was lazy but because just repeating “I am in the void” for so long gets me tired and makes me think of the void more and you actually don’t want to think too deeep about it. I couldn’t wake 3 hours prior and then affirm or even have the patience to do the psych k, yes I was extremely lazy back then and unpresistent but one thing that helped me even backed then was THE ALPHA STATE MEDITATION !
You just have to find what works for you, find a method technique whatever you want to do that doesn’t seem like a chore. So In a post back then I found on @gorgeouslypink acc talking about doing the alpha sate meditation and I tried it back then and I felt really relaxed and it was a good feeling but like I said back then I was realllly lazy so after a few mins I stopped. Then many months later passed and I was still looking for anything and everything on the void. Then just like two days ago I came across another post which was pretty simple and the technique I used was called the DISTRACTED TECHNIQUE.
All there was to do was the usual you get into a comfortable position and then she said to use the alpha state meditation and used the one gorgeouslypink recommended. So I used it and then what she tell you to do is to just think of anything else just get distracted basically and this WAS SO GOOD 4 ME because back then I had adhd so it made it harder to concentrate on just affirming and so yeah I just thought of random things and then at some point where I was completely distracted I felt my body like lift up 😭 if that makes sense I just can’t clearly describe it. It felt really like a shift and I was like ‘panicking’ in a way but I wasn’t actually panicking I just kinda became aware what was going and then I got scared a little but I just relaxed shortly after. Also my fan that was making like a loud noises was coming in an out and then I only hear it in one ear and then I didn’t hear anything and I just stayed there wondering if I reached the void and i actually was!!! I didn’t feel my body it felt like I had no body at all and it was pitch black just like how I imagined the void to be. For a few minutes I just stayed there feeling the most surreal peace I have ever felt. I needed that peace fr 💀.
So then I affirmed for my desires all I said was “I have all my desired results from my subliminal playlist.” Then just to be extra sure I just said “I have everything I want.”
At that point I got really excited and then I wiggled my toes to get out because I was too dam happy I needed to see all my shit the moment I wake up and then I slowly started getting out and when I tell you I cried for like a good dam minute when I woke up and saw how DIFFERENT. My room looked. I literally screamed onto my pillow. I was so dam scare and yet excited to see how I looked.
WHAT I MANIFESTED :
Desired body and face
Having silky straight tailbone length hair cuz mines was originally curly
And everything in my sub playlist
My desired boyfriend and guys I made him be like Gojo Satoru ( because we are all delusional over him 🤪) and let me tell you he is so tall, handsome, sexy and a literal god. He is so silly too 🩷
Moving countries I now live in ny
Never actually meeting my ex and all the people in my old school forget me and have actually never even met me. Like if u asked them about me they have never heard or known me before
Extremely rich rich like hella bands
Got rid of my anxiety and mental health issue
Plus +++
NEVER EVER GIVE UP ON YOUR DREAMS.
Even if the circumstances seem to be eating you alive don’t mind that too much. Even if all seems hopeless don’t give up because you already know nothing can decide or be unless you give it power to be. So stop being goofy and take responsibility and DONT STRESS!! You don’t see God stressing do you. All he has to do is blink and whatever he wants to happen, happens. Plus a lot of confidence came from non dualism that I owe a huge thanks to @trynafindbarbiee she really said it like it is !!
YOU GOT THIS ML 🩷🩷🩷🩷
3K notes · View notes
nouvxllev · 2 months
Note
Omg hi! Do you think you would ever do a sequel to head over heels, your hand over mine? Maybe where Jenna proposes?
your hand over mine, my ring over yours
Pairing: Jenna Ortega x Fem!Reader
Summary: ^ request!!
Words: 2.8k
Warnings: damn this is shorter than what i expected
a/n: the obvious answer is yes i (do) will!!
prev. || masterlist.
Tumblr media
"Why did you say yes to him anyway?" Jenna's voice, now your girlfriend (awesome as hell, you may add), echoed over the room. Mic in between both of her hands as she sways side to side over you.
The both of you decided to stay in the karaoke booth for a while, it was a waste of money after all. Your money, might you add. The guy didn't even bother to pay for it!
You shrugged, watching her figure fall into place beside you, a song chosen by Jenna playing in the background. "I needed to move on from you. It was clear I didn't have a chance."
Jenna's eyes narrowed, you could see her eyebrows crinkling even in the dimly lit room. "Move on? Didn't have a chance?"
You nodded, almost laughing at how the mic was still in direct contact with her lips, you were avoiding direct eye contact but it was so clear that Jenna was fuming.
"I seriously can't believe there's someone out there so oblivious and it's you." You heard her chuckle, yet her voice was soft. You expected her to get mad at you by the way she started her sentence, but you forgot she was the one who ran (not really) over here and confessed to you all so abruptly.
"Weren't the flowers and hundreds of letters mailed to your doorstep enough to hint that I liked you?"
You scratched your head, a sheepish smile playing on your lips. "Okay, in my defense, I just thought you were being extra friendly. Who wouldn't want a friend who sends flowers and letters, right?"
Jenna shook her head, letting go of the mic and crossing her arms. "I was practically spelling it out. All that was missing was dropping down on one knee and proposing to you."
You raised an eyebrow, "hey to be fair, my mom was the one who gave you the motivation."
Jenna shrugged, nodding her head with a smile. "Yeah, I owe her one."
------------------------------------------------------------------------------
That was five years ago.
Now it was your 5th anniversary with Jenna.
You lay at your bed with Jenna’s headphones on, staring at the ceiling for God knows how long, doing your best to fall asleep without Jenna’s warmth and presence beside you. It was difficult, difficult than it should be. You were the daughter of the Winona Ryder, damn it! Why couldn’t you go for months without the love of your life by your side.
Ever since you and Jenna got together, everyone was, of course, not surprised but they were happy nonetheless. Hell, you even took up acting just because you can be one of Jenna’s love interests in a movie. Of course, that could be a hassle for the directors whenever it was a kissing scene. They have to yell “cut!” In front of your faces to get the both of you to stop.
Now you couldn’t help but wallow in your own sadness because there weren’t two arms wrapped around your waist and a familiar warmth along your bed for the past and next two months.
All day, you've been binging Jenna's interviews, shows, and movies to the point you can rehearse them in the back of your head.
The room felt emptier without Jenna's presence. You noticed how she was returning so late at night, how her filming dates often varied so random you couldn't even be there or keep track, how she took up almost any part she was given to her, how she often came home looking so overworked and stress you couldn't even talk to her without fearing that she'd blow up on you. And now she's all the way across the country to film another movie.
The film industry often meant sacrificing personal time apart from the holidays, and Jenna seemed to be giving it all.
Yet she always gives you that damn smile, you couldn't possibly think she's falling out of love. But it still worried you why she was doing all of this.
She was hardworking and passionate, it was part of what made her so lovable, but you couldn't help but worry about how it was affecting her.
You sat on the edge of the bed, lost in thought, you could text or call her but you knew it wasn't going to be seen for atleast another three to four hours. You didn't doubt her love, it was one of the many things you couldn't, but the worry was still there.
That was until you got a notification.
j 🤍🎧
i missed u too yn o right can u check outside for a minute? i think i mailed a package outside your room might be beside the living room, i asked them to deliver it there personally seen, 11:44 PM
The only thought that ran across your mind was 'They can do that?'
Slipping on a pair of slippers, you made your way to the living room, your steps being pulled down by whatever weight that was on your shoulders.
Jenna's message made you happy, of course, the distance seemed a little bit smaller but you couldn't help but wish she said something more than requesting you to pick up her package. Maybe a simple little 'I love you and happy anniversary' would have been something to put you at ease.
As you turned the doorknob and stepped into the living room, the fluorescent light shining from the living room made your eyes burn like hell. You squinted, but that didn't really help, you tried to adjust to the light, putting your palm above your eyes.
"Why is she always across the country," you murmured to yourself, "why are you like this, Jenna?" Your voice started to get louder and louder once you started to speak to yourself even more. You were going insane, that's the most part, but who wouldn't. "Why couldn't you just choose a project closer to home for once..." It was selfish to ask for, too selfish to make Jenna choose you over her career, but you couldn't help it.
"Does she even love me..." Your voice trailed off when you turned the corner to the living room.
Oh, what the actual fuck.
It would be an understatement to say that the living room had been turned upside down. Everything was lit up, and everything was rearranged. Hell, there was a fucking balloon arch with Jenna at the center of it all while the couches were pushed back as if it was an aisle to a wedding ceremony.
Damn, were you that depressed to the point you couldn't even hear what the fuck was going on outside your room for Jenna to transform it into this?
You couldn't say anything. Every word that was about to come out of your mouth left before your mind can even process what was happening.
Without uttering a single word, you ran towards her, your heart pounding in your chest you wouldn't be surprised if you'd have a mid-crisis heart attack. You wrapped your arms around Jenna as if she was something so untouchable, burying your face in her neck as you melted within her presence, her scent mixing in with hers as she took a step back to hold you dearly.
Her comforting warmth was a fix even you can’t tolerate. Jenna was in your arms like before, her body fitting perfectly against yours, her soul reminding you why you were alive up until this point.
Your grip on her tightened, holding on to her as tears slowly started to stain her clothes, clinging onto Jenna as if she were a mirage about to disappear from your desperate arms.
"I missed you too." Jenna's voice broke through you, your tears coming in further. Her voice was soft and tender, coming as a whisper that soothed your troubles.
"How? Why?" You murmured, your voice mumbled and tear-streaked as you lifted your head to face her. Puffy eyes and all because of your crying. "Why are you here?" Your voice cracked, "I thought you wouldn't be back for another two months." You searched for something in Jenna's eyes, something that you longed to see once again.
Jenna gently wiped away a tear from your cheek, you missed how her touch was the most reassuring thing in the world. "I heard that Winona was out of the country for filming, and it's our anniversary." It was so little for the explanation but it said everything.
You pulled back once Jenna started rummaging out of her pocket, you watch Jenna pull out a small box.
Wait, holy fuck.
"Jenna, holy shit, is that—"
"Yes, yes it is that." She chuckled, nonchalantly, as if she didn’t just swoon you for the millionth time in the past minute, turned your living room into a makeshift wedding ceremony, and is now proposing to you.
"You can't be serious. Jenna if this is just some joke I'm actually breaking up with you."
"No, no, y/n! Of course it's not. I'm being completely serious."
She fiddled with the box, not opening it yet as you stood there with eyes wide open.
"I'm sorry," she began, her voice vulnerable and sincere as she looked up to you, "I'm sorry I haven't been around. I'm sorry I keep coming back home looking stressed, I'm sorry I took up too many auditions and movies that I can hold myself up to, I'm sorry I couldn't spare even a single minute of my time loving you as much as I did before, I'm sorry I made you worry countless of times, more than I can count even. I'm sorry I haven't been the partner you deserve."
She continued, on and on until tears welled up in your eyes once more. "I know I've been distant, I know I've caused pain in you for the past months, maybe even years and I know I've let my career consume me."
"I don't have any excuses for it." Her voice dwindled, almost cracking as she looked up, trying not to cry as she laughed. "But I did all of it for a ring that would bind us forever. It's not the—"
You couldn't help but push your lips against hers, cutting her sentence off. You missed this. How your pain went away with a kiss.
"It's the perfect excuse."
Her vulnerability touched your heart, she had never been more vulnerable to you than now, you gently reached out to gently wipe away the tears that had begun to fall from her eyes. "Jenna, it's okay," you reassured her as you noticed her lips started to tremble. "I understand. I understand all of it, all of you."
Jenna's gaze met yours once she started to calm down. And there you saw it, something you searched for in her eyes ever since she landed on your doorstep this evening. Devotion.
You kissed her once more, whispering, "You know how many people would kill to be your wife?" You didn't let her open the box just yet, you held back. You know she has more to say.
Jenna, with tears of joy still glistening in her eyes, chuckled at your words. "You'd die and kill. That's the difference between you and others. You'd die for our love, and you'd fight for it with everything you have, and I think that's morbidly fascinating." She explained, "and what do you mean?"
"I'm saying that are you sure you want to marry me? I mean, there are so many people in the world you haven't met." You explained, your lips trembling.
"I could meet all of them in a single file and yet, you would still be the one who enchants me," Jenna replied, brushing a strand of hair away from your face.
"I love too much."
"I'll let you pour all your loving on me, or love everyone in the world but me. Just stay by my side. That's all I ask."
"I cry too easily. Over the simplest of things."
"I'll let you cry an ocean that surrounds every inch of you and I'd swim across everything."
"I get mad more often than not."
"I'll let you throw storms my way, express your angry through disasters upon disasters and I'll be there for all eternity even if it kills me."
"I doubt myself too much. I don't even know if I love myself."
"I'll let you love yourself before you have a chance to love me. Doubt may knock on your door, but I'll be there to answer."
"I can be difficult to handle."
"I'll let you be someone you're not at times. I'll be the one to show understanding and how to love yourself before loving me yet again.
"I'm scared of losing you, too scared for you to even love me that much."
"Then let me take your hand, and let me show you that my love couldn't waver over. Even at death I'll call his name and let me live once more with you. I'll wish in every star that in every universe, we are together. I want you to see that I'm not going anywhere."
"You know you'd eventually drown if my love for you was an ocean."
"Then let me die," Jenna whispered, a smile gracing both of your lips, her eyes filled with that same devotion and commitment you saw five years ago.
You chuckled,"We have odd ways of saying I love yous."
"Well, I am proposing to you in your living room late at night. It's accounted for." Jenna laughed softly along with you, her eyes sparkling with affection as she leaned in to press a kiss to your lips, your mouth curving into a smile as she did so.
"Reminds me that you haven't said those five words yet."
"Oh right."
"Y/n," she got down on one knee, her hand on top of the box as she prepared to open it, "You're one marvelous, just spectacular girl I've ever met. I'm so fucking happy Winona decided to tag you along that day," she chuckled.
"Every chore wouldn't be the same without your presence by my side, and my presence beside yours, I don't want to ever imagine that. My heart surrendered to your precious eyes, and I say it truly from the deepest depths of my heart that it has no plans of bail. Wherever you go, I follow. I don't want you to be the only one suffering a burden that would eventually kill you, I don't want you to be alone in your times of darkness. So please, let me be the one who will carry your burdens, your sadness, your everything. Let me be the one who will scar and carve my heart and skin for you to dump your sadness and let me carry it with a proud heart. When I die, my spirit will do everything in its power to regain the same feeling when I was alive with you. How does one understand the great love you've given me that would last millions of lifetimes, y/n? You became the reason why I now wake up with a smile, and why I became the happiest version of myself. And now, I can't think of a better grave of eternal slumber than in your beloved arms. Thank you."
The sincerity in her words left a big hole in your heart, but it was nothing but mere content and happiness. Tears welled up in your eyes as she spoke.
"Will you, Y/N/L/N, marry me?" Jenna opened the box, the ring almost blinding your eyes. Ethereal was out of the question to describe it, it was too marvelous for words. It was diamond, of course, but it had other gems that symbolized something more than love.
"Yes. Yes, Jenna!" you exclaimed, "Yes, I will." You could almost say that a million times and not get tired of it. Especially when Jenna is looking at you as if you held the stars and the moon with your bare hands.
She chuckled, standing up as she waited for you to offer your hand. "Isn't it yes I do?"
You grinned, it was an understatement to say that your heart was brimming with pure joy and happiness. "When it comes to you, it's definitely not." You offered your hand to Jenna, her fingers tracing your hand as she delicately placed the ring on your finger. It felt like a promise because it was. You gazed at it with awe, it was more than a piece of jewelry on your hands, it was Jenna. It was Jenna entirely. Her person, her love, her soul, her everything on your hand.
"You look simply gorgeous. Oh my God, I can't believe I'm marrying you," Jenna squealed, her happiness infectious and heartwarming.
"That's my line," you jokingly laughed. "And isn't it gorgeous?"
"No, you're gorgeous. The ring is just a bonus," Jenna replied, staring at you instead of the ring she probably spent hundreds of sleepless nights over. How this woman loves you was beyond anything of human comprehension.
"I love you so much, even you, Jenna Ortega, couldn't describe it." You wrapped your arms around her waist, sealing the deal with a kiss on her lips once again. You never got tired of it.
"I love you too."
You pulled away, a smile lingered on your lips, knowing that no matter how many times you kissed Jenna, it would never be enough to represent the love you had for her.
With your hand over hers, and her ring over your finger, you couldn't imagine a life without her anymore.
------------------------------------------------------------------------------
a/n: i finished reading 7 husbands of evelyn hugo the other day and i cried so much. its such a great book!! i might do a story based off of it. i just dont know what jo characters should i do for the pairing
348 notes · View notes
goatpaste · 1 year
Text
Tumblr media
Alrighty, this has been something I'v been putting off for awhile because I really just wanted to save all the money myself but I just dont think its gonna be able to happen anytime soon and I'm tired of putting it off for Daisy's sake
but this is officially the Donation Post for us to start pooling together money to move daisy up from Texas to Pennsylvania. I'll bore you with the details under the cut but in the mean time here is links and info on the ways you can support the move!
[My commissions are Open] [My Etsy is Open]
[My Kofi were i offer PWYW commissions as low at 3$]
[My Toyhouse has designs for sale on it]
[You can Donate here and all the saving made toward this will be going directly into savings]
These are all the ways you can directly support us and help us work toward the goal of getting Daisy into a safe and better environment! I know not everyone is going to be able to chip in but anything helps even reblogs and sharing around! We've been talking about this move for over a year and I want to try and move her by the end of this year at the latest.
For more info on our specific situation and bit more details, please read under the cut
Daisy has been my friend since we were 6 years old, she is like a sister to me! We've been at each others side through thick and thin and I care about her so much.
Daisy's home life has never been the best and her parents are nightmare people who are a blight on the general public but as well as Daisy's home life.
Daisy doesnt have the ability to drive, work or save her own money even when she did work as her mother would take the money she earned constantly, and was ultimately the reason Daisy was unable to keep her job.
So for Daisy's end she has no ability to save and moving funds, it will primarily be on me to round up the money.
We are not 100% sure how much we are going to need at this moment in time but have a rough estiment.
Were hoping to get Daisy's mother on a good mood and have her pay for Daisy's plane ticket. We are going to be unable to move all her stuff and will just have to pack as much as she can into a large suitcase and fly up. So we will not have to pay for the plane, but will have to pay for bedding, and everything else she will need once up here. we have some temporary arrangements Via my bed and couch and potentially picking up a blow up mattress. But my current apartment is extremely small and not much room for two people let alone just me. Not sure how long I will be in this space while Daisy is up here if at all.
I may potentially reach out to my step father and ask him to dip into the savings he has kept for me to get Daisy furniture and necessities. But im avoiding that for as much as i can as im not on the best terms with my dad.
I will start looking for a bigger place for us to live together once we start getting in a comfortable area on savings. As the only money maker currently i will be needing savings to afford a place for us to share that will of course be much more expensive than where i am right now. Daisy will start looking for a job once she is/has moved up here and hopefully we will be able to support ourselves at that point, it will just be the first little bit of time we will need a cushion.
this is one of the areas im not 100% sure how much were going to need but certain in the thousands area knowing rent for a place big enough for two individuals.
after that its just gonna be us figuring it out.
but this is the situation as it stands right now, we are trying to help a trans woman out of her shitty living situation and across the country where her friends who love and care and want to support her are. We dont know exactly how much its going to be, but its going to be a lot and were really just looking for a bit of support!
thank yall so much!
1K notes · View notes
gemsofgreece · 7 months
Text
You really should know about Storm "Daniel"
Unlike how much all of us Greek blogs notify our tumblr communities about the regular (at this point) arsons wildfires afflicting Greece, we did not say much about the floods the country has been suffering from right now. There was a mention here and there and I even made a joke post as the storm was starting but not a lot of stuff in general. So, I think there's a couple of things you should know and I feel like I could address about it and actually it's not just about Greece. So I believe this could interest a lot of people and it should be something known worldwide.
In the beginning of September there was an alarm about an extreme weather phenomenon forming above the Ionian Sea at the west of mainland Greece. In truth, the phenomenon was not caused by the climate change. It was just a very rare occurence where a high pressure atmosheric system was sandwiched between two currents of low pressure. Low pressure systems are the ones resposible for stormy weather while high pressure systems generally create stable weather. As the low currents encircled the high pressure system, the storm that had started forming became unusually stable for a storm. As a result, the storm moved northeast above Thessaly and other regions of the central part of Greece and... just decided to stay there for an indefinite amount of time. Furthermore, because it's September and the Ionian Sea had warmed up throughout the summer, the medicane (Mediterranean cyclone) gained tropical features as it was forming, pushing its intensity to extremes unknown to this area.
The storm remained above all of central Greece for about 4-5 days but at the meantime it was causing side-storms in neighbouring countries, such as Bulgaria and Turkey. Both countries suffered from floods causing damages and deaths.
Tumblr media
Istanbul, Turkey (CNN).
Tumblr media
Tsarevo, Bulgaria (CNN).
Four people died in Bulgaria and seven in Turkey.
But like I told you the core of this was exactly on top of Greece's central mainland and islands. So what happened there? I happened to experience this shit first hand. My recollection of it is that it was unlike any other storm I had experienced before. My knowledge on meteorology is not very advanced, however I believe due to the high pressure part, there were actually no winds at all - or they were insignificant, so it wasn't like what you might have in mind as a conventional cyclone. It was a rainstorm but it was like a rainstorm from hell. The crucial part is that in Greece summer violent rainstorms may last for about five minutes but certainly not for five days nonstop. There was no pause, not even for a second. It kept pouring and pouring in indescribable volumes, without decreasing or slowing down, not for a moment. The fourth day it started taking short breaks.
As a person with a phobia of lightnings since childhood, I kept wearing earplugs throughout all these days. For four days, ten seconds did not pass without at least one lightning shrieking exactly on top of our heads. In the end, I am dead serious, I think my lifelong phobia has been cured somewhat due to this extreme exposure that eventually had a numbing effect. I think only the first day there was a record of 7,000 lightnings. I believe there must have been dozens of thousands overall. The lightnings also caused fires but the downpour was so overwhelming no fire could ever stand a chance.
Whether during or after the rains, what I was seeing outside was post-apocalyptic. The only thing missing was the zombies. It really looked like a background from a videogame, including a constantly lit up sky. I was not in danger though people dear to me were. The worst for me was a huge fall in the quality of living but that doesn't matter. The rains caused severe destructions across cities and villages. They caused floods, they broke bridges, they broke a massive number of roads, they made walls collapse, they destroyed springs, they damaged water and electricity outlets entirely, they drowned flocks and flocks of animals, they destroyed mountainous and coastal villages alike, they made cars float and fly over each other and they uprooted houses.
Tumblr media
Village in Mount Pelion, Greece.
But that's not the end of it. Four days later, the storm moved southwest towards the Ionian sea, basically to the place of its original formation. It side-swept over Athens in the meantime, flooding the city, but that doesn't mean much since I could cry and Athens would still flood with my tears. Anyway. AFTER the storm left, the floods caused by it started multiplying and expanding. Picture that: a crystal clear sky, a bright sun and your phone screaming state alerts about evacuating your village or town because a lake has launched at you! Here's the thing: Thessaly is a massive plain surrounded by a ring of mountains. Half of those downpours fell right on the lowlands causing floods and destructions the first days. The other half however fell on the mountains, filled the streams heading down and they all met up and filled the lakes and the large river of Thessaly, Pineios and they all basically exploded the next days. Pineios especially exploded both in its western and eastern part, sinking the entirety of Thessaly's plains under water. As a result, floods were actively taking place days after the storm had ended and the weather was good. The phenomena have only started subduing since yesterday.
Tumblr media
The overflowing of the river, trapped by the mountains.
Farmers won't be able to work this year and next year is questionable as well. There are huge concerns about various epidemics breaking out as more and more dead animals are found in the waters. Entire villages are under the water. There are estimations that some villages in west Thessaly might have been lost forever and their residents will have to move elsewhere. Sixteen people have died from the rainstorm and the floods.
Tumblr media Tumblr media
Actual villages in Karditsa, Greece.
A more longterm danger is that the ground received such an unnatural amount of water that it might have been severely eroded and destablised, making it vulnerable to natural disasters I don't want to utter. Many roads are either broken or bloated and Thessaly has been cut out from communication and transportation with the rest of the country. To this day, there are maps guiding people how to drive from North to South Greece and vice versa by entirely skipping Central Greece! (Hint: they will have to drive through Epirus, aka western Greece.) The first days there was also complete isolation from what was happening in the country and the world and also the very regions we were in as we had no electricity and our only chance was getting a call from somebody being elsewhere and telling us what is going on.
Tumblr media
Volos, Greece (CNN)
Many regions have received within 2-4 days 55 times their monthly amount of rain or more than twice the yearly amount. Greek meteorologist Christos Zerefos estimated that such a phenomenon occurs every 300-400 years. Meteorologists were alarmed internationally - with Germans and Americans reportedly saying they hadn't studied such a phenomenon again in their career. Its intensity was record high in the history of Greece and right in the top of Europe's as well. They also agreed that such a phenomenon would be devastating even if it had hit the most advanced and prepared country.
BUT THIS IS NOT THE END. The weakened Daniel seemed to slowly move towards South Italy but it decided to take a turn and headed south towards Libya and Egypt. Quite possibly, as the storm was once again travelling across the warm Mediterranean Sea, it was rejuvenated and gained even more tropical traits. Eventually, the medicane hit Libya with unprecedented force.
Tumblr media
The cyclone travelling from Greece to Libya.
The toll it took on Libya is unspeakable. As I am writing this,
More than 5,226 people are killed and more than 10,000 are currently missing.
Like, can you wrap your head around what I am talking about? I don't see this shit being acknowledged enough across the world. I am checking this again and again, to ensure I am reading this correctly.
Daniel has officially become the deadliest medicane on record.
Tumblr media
Eastern Libya, from Al Jazeera.
In the meantime, Greeks found opportunities to practice their favourite sport: political infighting. People who weren't even here when hell broke loose say that if this or that was properly done, we would not have problems at all. I even saw an idiotic Greek expat comment how "we got drowned in a little bit of rain". The truth is we should bloody thank our lucky stars and I say this with the entire awareness of half of Thessaly being currently underwater. It is true that Greek governments and people have done so many things badly, like building on top of streams and rivers, changing rivers' natural route, drying up natural lakes and all that shit that guarantees you are going to have massive problems once a serious storm breaks out. Also, the disaster revealed that there was once more a very questionable management of all the money given by the EU for anti-flooding measures after a previous flood (Ianos). Of course, I would be happy if at last we viewed this disaster as an opportunity to improve ourselves and the management of our land, however whatever happened these days wasn't the fault of anyone in particular. On the contrary, A LOT worse could have happened. A lot. Maybe Libya is not an indication because if Greece is not used to such extreme rain phenomena, then Libya is probably ten times less used to them, however we should not forget that this monster was STUCK at least five days over the heartland of Greece. For this alone we should damn be thankful we did not get it any worse and that the land endured in any way and of course now we have to correct old mistakes as well but let's do it united and determined and without wasting time once more in pointless infighting, which in this case might even be unfair. (In fact I think the thing we should blame the state the most about was not making it clear beforehand that this was going to be unprecedented, not just "very severe". They probably didn't want to cause panic and mayhem but still. We should know.) Of course I am not talking about how the state will treat the afflicted regions from now on, which is entirely its responsibility. And we should stand next to Libya. Greece has its wounds to mend but it should absolutely provide support to Libya. We know what this freak phenomenon was like.
I know this text is long but please consider reblogging this. We should know what happens on our planet. Thousands of people are dead from a freak phenomenon devastating regions across lands and seas. Also forgive any mistakes I might have made although I believe the information is correct for the most part. I didn't speak more about Libya because I don't know enough to analyze the situation as much. Perhaps there are ways of supporting the country too. As a last note, this phenomenon was not freakish because of the climate change - it was just a very unusual occurence. However, the - otherwise normal - warmth of the sea did feed and intensify the storm and the climate change might in the future cause these super rare, accidental phenomena to become more frequent.
783 notes · View notes
mystic-writings · 3 months
Text
tangled up (in strings of emotion) | wilbur soot
Tumblr media
PAIRING – wilbur soot x fem!streamer!reader, implied wilbur x shubble
REQUEST – anon - Hi! ok so, i had a very angsty idea. basically, we all know how wilbur had a crush on shubble? basically, my idea is that wilbur and streamer!reader have been dating for a while and the internet loves them (as they should) and reader and shubble are good friends like reader, shubble and niki are all like an iconic trio, but then wilbur starts to distance from reader and spend more time with shubble and you know who catches on first? james. and then jack figures it out, and tommy and niki and the band all have it figured out and niki (i love niki more than life itself) tells reader and the readers like “fuck you, it’s me or her william.” with prompt 9 from “angst prompt 2”?? i feel like that would be really really cool and your angst is absolutely *chefs kiss* :) if you don’t wanna do it that’s fine! just a thought, have a lovely day!!
PROMPT – 9. “don’t make me choose.”
SUMMARY –  you finally find out why your relationship with wilbur is falling apart, even if you didn’t see the signs. 
WARNINGS – angst, hurt/no comfort, tw cheating mentions
WORD COUNT – 2,720
NOTES – i listened to haunted by tswift the entire time i wrote this bc it matches so well tbh | first fic of 2024 & no surprise, it’s ANGST !!
masterlist | taglist form
Tumblr media
How have you been so blissfully ignorant all this time?
These past few years of your life, the ones you once looked back upon as the best of your life thus far, were tainted with a dark stain. 
You don’t know how you missed it. All the signs were there, but maybe you were just too happy to believe that something could’ve been wrong in the first place. 
Being a streamer, and a successful one at that, was a blessing you never thought you’d have. It led you to all of your best friends, and to your boyfriend of nearly three years. Wilbur Soot, more commonly known now as Will Gold, who you met through your friends Niki and Shelby. It felt like it was fate, meeting him. You were at a point in life where things just felt sour all the time, and you barely had the energy to create content at the time. Then, around the beginning of January 2020, Niki asked if you wanted to make a video with her, Philza, and Wilbur, and from there things were history. 
After starting dating over the internet for a while, and with the lockdowns coming and going frequently, you and Wilbur met for the first time in his tiny flat in London. It was amazing, spending that time together, just the two of you. Deciding to make things public and when was a tough decision, but you thought it would be safer to do so after you took the jump and moved to England. You’d never forget that conversation, sitting on your kitchen counter at 4am.
“And you’re sure you want to do that?” Wilbur asked. “I mean, moving here, moving across the country just so we can be together it’s- it’s-” 
“A big step, Will. I know. But it’s been almost a year, you know. Restrictions are lifting soon. And I want to be with you. I want to be able to see Tommy and Phil and Niki and Jack easier. I want to be happy.” You told him. “I know I have Shelby here, and I love her with everything I have, but she’s the only thing here and it’s just not enough anymore. I need you.” 
After a long, anxiety-inducing silence, Wilbur sighed. “I know. I need you too. I just want to make sure you’re making the right decision here, you know? I don’t want you to have gone through all that trouble just to get here and find you don’t like it, or something happens and you have to go back, anyway.”
You shook your head, even though your boyfriend couldn’t see you. “Nothing’s going to go wrong, Wilbur. I know what I want. And besides, there’s no place on Earth I wouldn’t live if it meant I could live with you.” 
“I love you.” 
“I love you, too.” 
“You should go to sleep. It’s almost 5 in the morning. You need rest.” Wilbur told you, and you couldn’t help but smile. 
“I know, I know. I’ll talk to you later, though. I promise.” 
“Alright, darling. Love you.”
“Love you, too, Will.”
Tumblr media
And it was after a long, unnecessarily stressful process with customs and gathering the right papers, that you finally moved in with Wilbur, who began renting an apartment in Brighton not long after the process began. 
Over a several-week-long process, you met all of your best friends in person for the first time, and it was the best few weeks of your life. Niki especially was excited to meet you, and she was one of the first to do so. 
Life for the next year or so was amazing to say the least. Yours and Wilbur’s respective careers were taking off, his in music and yours in streaming and on YouTube. Everything was coming out on top for the both of you, and for all of your friends. 
Until now, you were the happiest you’ve felt in a very long time. 
You and Wilbur had been travelling for his tour for a while now, both of you putting off streaming to travel with the rest of Lovejoy for their very first American tour. Christmas was closing in, and you were in California, visiting Shelby, Quackity, and a ton of other friends that you hadn’t seen in a long time. 
Wilbur’s show was amazing, as per usual, and you and Shelby spent the whole night glued to one another. Will, like he normally did during the performances when you were in the crowd, kept tossing loving glances your way for most of the set. He even dragged Quackity on stage to cover a song with him. It was truly amazing. 
Tumblr media
The trip to see your friends, and the rest of the tour overall, was amazing. After it ended and you all went back to England, you noticed a shift in Wilbur’s behaviour. At first you assumed it was just work stress and post-tour burnout of sorts, but soon it became very apparent that it wasn’t directed at anyone but you. 
You spent a lot of time around Wilbur and your friends, as group hangouts became very common since you were both gone for so long. They were normally hosted at Tommy’s flat or James’, sometimes Jack’s house or round yours. It was always fun, though, and that’s what mattered.
Streams became frequent again, both solo and with whoever was available at the time, planned or not. You even did a subathon for your birthday that lasted a week and a half. You invited everyone in the area to come over for cake, called those who were too far away and everything; it truly was a wonderful birthday. 
Content creation was always unpredictable, and everyone’s lives were hectic, so you weren’t too surprised when Shelby stopped communicating with you as frequently over the next few months. The summer of 2023 seemed to be busy for everyone, including yourself. 
You were helping Tommy with his tours and upcoming plans, and your own plans for the future had you being pulled every which way. Wilbur even bought a house for the two of you, despite the rift that was still forming between the two of you. He spent most nights in his office, playing video games or working on music. 
Still, even with the distance between you, you never would’ve guessed that the others could see it, too. 
It started with James giving you odd looks whenever you’d excuse Wilbur’s lack of presence at hangouts, even when they were at your house. Then Niki, who asked if you were okay on more than one occasion. Then Jack, who came to you about an editing problem and brought up how you hadn’t mentioned Wilbur in a little while, and whose mood seemed to sully when you shrugged and told him it was because he was very busy right now. Then one by one, it seemed everyone was catching onto it, and you nearly shouted at them to leave you alone, because it was your relationship and you didn’t see any problems.
Even if Wilbur barely slept in the same bed as you anymore. Even if he rarely ever touched or kissed you anymore.
Niki. Poor, unfortunate Niki, was the first to find out why. She never told you how, or who told her, but she was the only one who knew. She came to you with it on a beautiful Friday afternoon, a day where you both decided to not stream in favour of a nice, relaxing afternoon in your backyard, drinking coffee at a little table in your garden, full of flowers and flourishing at your hand and hard work. 
She’d seemed off to you the entire time she was there, quietly sipping on her second cup of coffee and admiring the flowers. 
“Are you okay, Niki?” You’d asked, eyeing her with concern. 
Her eyes snapped to yours from the peonies beside her. “What? I’m fine, Y/n, don’t worry.” 
“You sure?” You asked. “You seem… off. Like something’s bothering you. If you want to talk, we can, I mean, we’ve been friends for long enough that you can tell me anything you want. You know that, right?”
“Of course, I’m not an idiot.” She stated, fiddling with her fingers. Her stature was small, eyes attempting to steer clear of your gaze and finding solace in her mug. “I just- I don’t know if you’ll like what I have to say, and I don’t want to hurt you. You’re my best friend.” 
You smiled gently at the girl. “Don’t worry, Niki. If there’s something you need to tell me, I’m sure I can handle it. You can’t hurt me that badly.” 
Your smile faltered when Niki’s weary eyes met yours. “Y/n, I’m so sorry. I only found out last night, and I hate to be the one to tell you, especially because it’s not any of my business, I just felt that you needed to know, I-”
“Niki, calm down,” you reached out to place your hand atop hers, and she turned it over to grip it in return. “What’s going on?”
“It’s Wilbur.” She sighed, and your heart rate skyrocketed. “I know why he’s not acting himself around you.” 
“Is he okay? I mean, he’s healthy right?” You asked. “Why wouldn’t he tell me this himself?”
“Because he didn’t want you to know.” She said, tears forming in her eyes. “He’s not sick or anything, Y/n. He’s… he’s in love with someone else.” 
The world around you could’ve set fire and you wouldn’t have known. Niki’s words rang in your ears, and your heart plummeted from the place in your chest, as if Wilbur himself had dropped it from the safe place you put it; right into his hands. 
“With who? Do I know her?”
Niki only nodded, sniffling and blinking away her tears while yours threatened to fall. After a long silence and a heavy sigh, she squeezed your hand again and opened her mouth, her next words coming out shakily. “It’s… Y/n, it’s Shelby.”
You pulled your hand from hers. “What?”
“They’ve been talking for months now. She told me last night and I haven’t spoken to her since then,” Niki swore. “She said she feels bad for doing this to you, especially because she rejected Wilbur for a long time and you’re best friends. I guess she couldn’t stop herself after a while. I don’t know. All she said was that Wilbur initiated it.” 
“She still participated.” You said, words lined with tears. “Do you know how long he’s been… been pursuing her?”  You nearly gagged on the words. 
Niki nodded. “Since the LA performance in December.” 
Somehow, your heart fell further than it did before. 
Finding out was a blessing and a curse, really. Everything started to make sense once you truly thought it over. All those nights holed up in his office lately, the distance that formed after the tour ended. Those loving glances during the LA show. Somehow, you could tell now that they weren’t for you. 
After you talked and cried more about it with Niki, she left to go tend to her cats in her apartment, and offered a place to stay if you needed it. 
You spent hours on the couch, anxiously awaiting Wilbur’s return from the studio. Your stomach turned with the thought that he could be on the phone with Shelby right now, chatting and making her laugh and telling her how much he felt for her. You almost broke when you wondered if he’d ever told her he loved her. 
Finally, well after sundown, the door creaked open and shut. In walked Wilbur, guitar case gripped in one hand, shoulders sagging from the weight of the day. 
“Hello, love.” You said, barely looking at him, words cold as ice.
He tossed a quick glance at you. “Hi, darling. How was your day?”
“Good.” You said, watching him lean the guitar against the arm of the couch, lazily kissing your head as he did. 
Somehow, after all these months of being emotionally distant, Wilbur could tell something was wrong. “You okay?” He asked as he headed to the kitchen on the opposite side of the house. 
With a sigh, you stood up and clenched your fists. Might as well get it over with. “What’s going on with you lately, Will?”
His brows furrowed as he stopped in the doorway, turning to face you. “What d’you mean? I’m fine, darling.” 
“No you’re not.” You said. “You’ve been distant, and for a while now. You’ve been borderline avoiding me. It’s like you’re not even in a relationship with me! Like you don’t want to be in a relationship with me anymore! Did you know our friends have noticed? Every time I show up to a gathering without you they ask what’s wrong. Where you are. And I have nothing to say because I didn’t think anything was wrong.”
Wilbur sighed, face scrunched with indignation. “That’s because nothing’s wrong. I’m just busy.”
“Really? What, busy talking to Shelby?”
Wilbur’s face fell, the colour going with it. 
“Yeah, don’t act surprised, Will. I know.” You said, the emotion finally flowing back to you. “I know you’ve been seeing my best friend behind my back. I know you’ve been pursuing her for a year. Niki told me. She said you’ve been after Shelby, wearing her down, trying to get her to go behind everyone’s back. After all this time, after everything we’ve been through, and you cheat on me with her of all people? My best friend. The woman who helped introduce us and you didn’t think I’d find out at some point?” 
“Look, it’s not what you think, I just-” 
“Just what, Wilbur?” You asked, biting back a sob. “Just wanted to use me to get to her? I don’t even know why you asked me out in the first place. I knew you had a crush on her before we started dating.” You breathed a shaky sigh, wiping the tears from your cheeks. “I guess I was just naive enough to think you’d gotten over it. Maybe you did, for a little while.”
“I swear, it’s nothing like that, Y/n. I love you, I do.” He pleaded. “Just let me explain everything, please.” 
“I don’t want to hear it. I can’t believe you, Wilbur. You bought a house for us! I moved here for you! We were building a life together! And you tore it all down for her!” You screamed. The neighbours could probably hear you by now, but you didn’t care. You needed to let everything out. “I left my family behind, my life behind for you. That’s how much I love you. I guess you just don’t love me enough to do the same.” 
“Y/n, don’t- I love you, too. We can fix this, I swear. I promise.” 
“Fuck you.” You spat, catching Wilbur off guard. “You don’t love me. Not enough to cheat on me with one of my best friends. So fuck you, William. It’s me or her. You don’t get to have us both. I won’t put myself through that.”
Wilbur’s eyes filled with emotion, with indecision. “Don’t. Please, Y/n, don’t make me choose.”
You stepped closer to him, fury burning through you. “Fine, then I will. I don’t know what the hell you thought you could do when you got yourself into this, but you’re sure as hell not gonna keep dating me.”
Before Wilbur could speak, you were marching upstairs to your bedroom – the room you spent more time in than Wilbur did – texting Niki on your way to pack a bag. Your heart was crumbling to dust in your chest, and the emotion was finally replacing whatever temporary anger you felt, crashing through you like waves, putting out the fire within you. 
Wilbur begged and pleaded as you packed your bag, but you didn’t listen. You just packed whatever was necessary, whatever you could think to bring for the night. You’d come back for the rest later. 
15 minutes later, after a quiet Uber ride, you were sitting in Niki’s living room, crying and wondering what you were going to do next. Because you changed your life for Wilbur, and it was his reckless betrayal that tore it all down around you. 
Tumblr media
forever taglist: @just-here-to-escape-from-reality@mazerunnerrose @theboldandthebootyful @miraclesoflove @queen-asteria04 @heliads
wilbur soot taglist: open!
169 notes · View notes
barzysunflower · 10 months
Text
you’re losing me — mat barzal
ok so I definitely impulse wrote this after listening to the song one too many times! (still listening to it, still sobbing about it) definitely check it out although it may be a bit hard to find haha taylor pls just release it
spoiler: this is a HEA bc I am incapable of writing/reading sad endings. my life sucks enough, my fictional world doesn’t need to either lol so not all aspects of the song are used/it’s not exactly the same as the song, it’s just inspired by it
word count: 3.9k warning: angsty, with hea
Tumblr media
"I need a break."
"From what?"
"Us."
—————————
When you started dating your boyfriend Mat seven years ago you thought you were going to get married. Even with his busy schedule he was the most attentive, caring, and loving boyfriend you could have ever dreamed of. When he moved to New York, of course you were extremely happy for him. Playing in the NHL had been his dream since he was a kid, so you were very supportive, but you couldn't help but feel heartbroken over him moving across the country and leaving you. But ever since the day he landed in the city, he begged you to come live with him and eventually he convinced you. You transferred university to one in New York, lived in the dorms for a couple of years until Mat and you got an apartment together. You finished your undergraduate degree, then started and finished your masters. Mat had always been just as supportive of you as you of him. He made living away from your family easy. He made living easy. Date nights in all shapes and forms, luxurious vacations, and just him making you happy with all of his little quirks. Your relationship was something straight out of a movie. It was perfect. Until it wasn't.
You don't know when things began to change in your relationship, nothing really caused it, but one day you started feeling unhappy. Mat changed. Or maybe you did. But you weren't the same two people you once were. When you came home from work, you got a 'hello' and a kiss but the passion behind his eyes were gone. He barely asked you about your day anymore or told you about his. Just enough before you fell back into silence. You didn't used to mind the silence. Sitting comfortably in silence was a sign you truly felt at peace with a person, but when the silence got uncomfortable for you, you knew something was wrong. The amount of times you two went out alone decreased to the point where you could count on one hand the amount of dates you had been on in the past two months.
He just stopped making an effort and any effort you put into the relationship was rejected or gone unnoticed. Like making him dinner or doing his laundry and him not at least thanking you for it.
His love language was most definitely touch, but even that had slipped away day after day. He kissed you in the mornings, at night, and when either of you got home, but the spontaneous make out sessions or random quickies throughout the day were basically nonexistent anymore. You had sex after his games or when he got home from a roadie, but somehow that had started to feel like an effort.
You missed the old Mat that always had some part of his body touching yours. At dinner, sitting next to each other, he usually intertwined his pinky with yours, only breaking to use his knife. Or he always held your hand or had an arms wrapped around you when you were out of the house, like he was afraid to lose you. That stopped and now you were the one afraid that you had lost him.
You had just gotten too comfortable with each other. You knew each other so well you could anticipate what the other would say or feel that you didn't need to tell each other anymore. You still wanted to that, you were still interested in what he had to say, in hearing his voice, but after countless efforts being rejected, it was easier to say nothing.
The worst part was that you couldn't even blame his schedule and just wait for the season to end. It hadn't changed. You had made it work that past few years before, even with you being busy with school, so why now? You were starting to question your self worth, because what else could it be?
The last few months had been hell for you, silently and lonely suffering. Because every time you brought up the subject of your relationship, he said everything was fine and that we'd just hit a little rut that would resolve itself.
You wanted to believe him so badly. You wanted to believe that everything would be okay. You didn't want to throw the last seven years away. You had worked so hard to be here. You had experienced so much together, made so many memories. Was it really worth throwing it all away?
But you were sick of waiting for it to stop. Sick of your efforts being lost. Sick of Mat not seeming to care. You hit your breaking point.
And that's how you found yourself on the verge of tears standing in front of Mat in your kitchen in which you had made so many beautiful memories. "I just can't sit around waiting for you do something anymore. I gave you so many chances for you to do something, say something, risk something for me, but you did nothing. You're losing me, Mat, you don't even seem to care."
He blinked. A blank expression on his face. Just like the last few months. Some part of you wasn't surprised, the other ripped your heart into shreds.
"I just– I need a break."
"From what?," he finally asked, already knowing the answer.
"From us." A tiny, very tiny, weight lifted off you when you said it out loud. You had been wanted to say it for months and although you weren't happy about the situation, you were proud of yourself that you did. "I'm going back to Seattle for a few months. I just need space from you right now."
"When? For how long?" That's probably the most he'd asked about you in a while.
"I haven't booked a flight yet, but probably tomorrow." He nodded, pressing his lips together. "At least until the end of your season. Until you have some free time to figure out if you still love me or not." You lips were shaking, tears threatening to flow freely. You didn't want to say it, but a part of you felt bitter.
"(Y/n)–"
"No!," you stopped him. You couldn't hear it. "If you tell me you love me right now I'll stay. And this wasn't an easy decision but a necessary one. I'm weak for you, Mat. I'd do anything for you, but I don't feel that from you. So, please, just stop. I made up my mind. This has to happen. Maybe in a few months we can work it out, but right now I need space."
He gave you another nod then turned around and left. You heard him rustling around in your bedroom and a few minutes later your front door slammed shut. He was gone. A part of you was angry at him for not putting up a fight, but then again you had asked him not to. But just once, you wanted him not to listen to you and tell and show you how he felt. You guessed you had your answer.
The next few months were rough for you. A different kind than the few months before, but still difficult. You missed Mat terribly. Countless of times you came close to booking a flight back home to New York and burying your face in his chest. But it wasn't your turn this time. He had to fight for you.
But you missed him nonetheless. You had almost called him when Anthony got traded just a couple weeks after you left, but you didn't. Then again when not shortly after he got hurt in a game against Boston. You wanted, but you didn't. Not until he did. But he never did.
It took a while, but you started to be able to breath again. You got a small job at a café, since you took a leave of absence from your big girl job in New York and still needed some money. You made some new friends, most of your old ones having moved away or gotten too out of touch with, and developed a new daily routine. You started feeling better, but the whole inside you was reserved for only Mat to fix and would probably take years to mend if he didn't make a move soon.
Weeks, then months went by and not a single word from Mat. You couldn't even see him on TV for his games (which you still watched) since he was injured and his social media was a bust too. Your friends and his teammates (also your friends) checked in every once in a while, asking how you were and telling you how miserable Mat was. But unless you saw that for yourself, you couldn't really believe it.
Then, by some miracle the Islanders made it to the playoffs and Mat was scheduled to be back to playing. You tuned in, but almost had to turn it back off when you saw his face. His beautiful face that you loved to kiss and touch and simply just look at. Now though, it was riddled with frown marks, dark under eye circles and his unshaven scruff that took you years to like. He fought more on the ice, too. He rarely took penalties for righting but during these next few games he collected them like trophies. He was short and snippy in his post game interviews, again, something usually unlike him. He was miserable, you could tell. But then why had he not made an effort to get you back? Had you pushed him too far away when you left him? Was that the wrong thing to do?
You fought with yourself day and night. You wanted to go back to him and fight for him, but then you remembered that you did. You did fight for him countless of times. In your head you used to screamed at him to do something, say something, risk something, but he never did. So stayed put, waiting for his season to end and see what he would do.
A couple weeks later, your parents were out for dinner, you were home watching a movie with a big glass of wine when the doorbell rang. You didn't feel like answering, but who rang the doorbell after six pm? Your ex boyfriend who just showed up without a warning from across the country did. Or current boyfriend?
He stood there, outside your door with his grown out hair, unshaven beard, and sad look on his face. You started at him, processing. He was here.
"Mat? What–"
"No! It's my turn to talk now! (Y/n), you left. You just fucking left me without a warning." When you opened your mouth to protest, he held up his hand silencing you. "I know, I probably should have seen it coming, but you left! That hurt like hell."
He rubbed his face with his hands, also combing through his hairs before he went on. "I don't know what happened. I swear. I felt something change, yeah, but I just got comfortable. I didn't fall out of love with you. Never. And I'm sorry. I just assumed you felt the same and I shouldn't have. I should have checked in more. I'm sorry for taking for granted what I had. You. You're the best thing that's ever happened to me and I totally understand if you're done with me, because no one should take you for granted. (Y/n), I love you and the way you care for people, for me. You light up any room you walk in, you make everyone smile, you're– god, you're so so beautiful."
He took a deep breath, fighting his tears. You had given up holding them back pretty much the second you opened the door. "What I'm trying to say is, I'm sorry. I've been such a jerk and I realize that and take full responsibility. These past few months have been hell for me without you there. Our apartment feels so cold without you. But it gave me some time to think about everything I fucked up and everything I will do better if you're willing to take me back. Please take me back, (y/n), I don't know how to live without you." He shook his head and tears away, collecting himself. "No, wait. I came here to apologize and give you time to decide whether you'll forgive me. The 'I want you back' speech will come later. If you'll hear it."
You were speechless. All these months, even before you left, that's what you had been hoping and begging for to hear. Why couldn't you speak? Or move?
Moments passed with the two of you just staring at each other. Mat hesitated to say more, but he couldn't read your face. Did you want to hear more or slap him in the face and tell him to leave? "Alright, uhm, I'm gonna go. Don't really know where, but I'm sure there's a hotel open around here." He got ahold of the suitcase next to him. "Uhm. I guess, text me? Or call? Whenever you're ready."
He waited a few more seconds for you to move, but when you didn't he slowly turned around and walked out of your driveway. Seeing his back turned, him walking away from you again when he had just come back made you snap out of it. "Maty!"
You sobbed running up to him and into his arms that had opened for you the second you yelled his name. You buried your face in the crook of his shoulder, inhaling his scent while you clung to him. He held onto you just as desperately. His hand I'm your hair at the back of your head, the other around your waist holding you tight to his body. You felt like home again after months and months of searching for it. You heart expanded and pounded swiftly for him and him alone.
"Fuck, baby, I missed you so much." He had let you down, but now both of his hands held your cheeks as he looked at you. He dropped his forehead against yours. "I'm so sorry."
You weren't ready to forgive him just yet, but you were so ready for him to kiss you. "Kiss me." And boy, did he. His mouth attacked yours with that intoxicating passion you had missed so much. Your tongues danced their dance without a hitch as he claimed you as his again.
You must have stood out there for minutes before breaking apart and coming up for air. You pulled him into the house, you had given your neighbors enough of a show. You settled on the couch, but put a pillow in between the two of you so you could talk things out before you did something you'd regret. That didn't stop him though from reaching his hand out to you. First, he took your hand then let it wander up to your face. "Come back home with me," he whispered. His sad green eyes were begging, too, a look that was very hard to resist.
"I want to," you whispered back, your voice starting to shake with emotion again. "But I can't just go back like nothing happened. Mat, those few months were extremely painful for me, I can't just ignore that. I'm so happy you realized it now, but I need to see some action. Your words, as happy as I am to hear them, aren't going to fix it alone."
He nodded, then dropped his forehead against yours. "I'm sorry. I'll fix this. I promise."
"We'll fix this. I don't want to throw us away, I want to work on this, but we need to do it slowly."
He nodded again and brushed his lips against your nose. "I have to go back to New York tomorrow. I have a few meetings and exit interviews and stuff, but after that I can come back here or you come back and I'll live with Wally or something for a while so we can work on this."
You nodded and threw the pillow separating you to the floor. You'll hash out the details later, but right now you just needed his big, warm hug. You sat like this for hours, not saying much, just enjoying each others company after you had been away from each other for so long.
The next day, he really did leave to go back to New York but he came back just a few days later. He stayed at a hotel, which did feel weird, but it was for the best. You needed to trust him again and doing it slowly would result in the best outcome. You spent a few hours together every day, catching up and talking about your plans to rebuild your relationship. At the end of the day, he'd bring you home and kiss you for a few minutes, then leave. Every time you wanted to run after him and go with him, but you could already feel the hole in your heart fixing itself, so you didn't and just trusted the process.
The day you told him you were ready to come back to New York was one you'd never forget. He spun you around in the middle of the park you had decided to have lunch at and kissed you like nobody was watching. It felt good, like the beginning again.
You celebrated his birthday a few days later and the day after he left to go visit his family in Vancouver for a few days while you tied up some loose ends here in Seattle. You'd meet back in New York in your apartment.
After an exhausting cross country flight, you were surprised Mat had sent an Uber to pick you from the airport instead of picking you up himself. But when you finally walked through your apartment door and the lights were off except for a few lamps and candles that you had carefully collected over the last few years, you knew why.
Mat, dressed nicely, stood in the middle of your living room surrounded by flowers and lit candles. Little Polaroids and pictures of the two of you were laying across the floor and furniture as well. You approached him slowly, taking his outstretched hand until you stood directly in front of him. His other hand slid into his pants pocket and pulled out a small red velvet box.
"I promise I'm not doing this out of desperation to get you back. I've had this ring since last year. I've been thinking about doing this for a long time. I've just been waiting for the right moment. I didn't want to propose during the season because I wanted to celebrate and do it right. And I had planned on taking you to Africa or the Maldives or somewhere more fun than our apartment but, you know... And I can't wait any longer." He smiled, then chuckled. "But, I'll still take you wherever you want to go."
"Maldives sound good." Why that was the only thing you were answering to you weren't sure, but with a chuckle he kept going.
"Good. And that probably also means you're not going to say no to my next question, but I'll ask anyway." He lowered down in front you onto one knee with his hand still holding onto your left. "(Y/n), for the past seven years, there is not one second that I haven't loved you. I know I haven't always shown that, but I promise you that won't happen again. You are the most important thing in the world to me and I promise there won't be another day where you will question that ever again. There's no one else I want to spend the rest of my life with. It's you, babe, it's always been you. Will you marry me?"
You dropped down to your knees and grabbed his face to kiss him. "Yes," you repeated over and over again between kisses that tasted salty due to the tears running down your face. He got emotional, too, when he finally slid the ring on your finger. It was exactly the one you wanted and had dreamed of getting your entire life. It was perfect and so was he.
And he did keep his promise. Now and every single day there after.
*******
a few years later
"... the end."
"Again!"
"No, it's bed time now, honey."
"No! No sleep! One more book." Your three year old son jumped from your lap and dove towards the bookshelf to pick out another book to read. You checked your phone to see if your husband would be home any minute and in fact he would be, so you agreed to one more book.
"There you guys are." The door opened and Mat walked in with a big smile on his face.
"Daddy!" Your son, again, jumped from your lap into his fathers arms.
"Hi, buddy. I missed you." They hugged dramatically while your son told him all about his morning. Mat eventually put him down and took the couple steps need to get to you.
"Hi, princess. I missed you, too." He picked up your almost one year old daughter, who was also sitting in your lap, and hugged and kissed just as dramatically as he did with your son. Her sleepy eyes lit up with excitement and she filled the room with adorable baby giggles.
"What about me?," you pouted as you stood up.
"You have no idea." His arm wrapped around your shoulder and his lips gently touched yours, but with two children demanding your attention, the kiss was kept short.
You all hung out in the room for a bit, catching up on what Mat had missed while he was away for the last few days on his hockey road trip. Then you put your kids to bed, although putting an exited toddler to bed was no easy task, but eventually he did fall asleep.
"Hi," Mat whispered after you finally closed your sons bedroom door. You turned to face him and his messy hair made you smile. He aged like fine wine and you were thankful every day that he was yours.
"Hey." His hands took ahold of you and slowly pushed you against the hallway wall.
"I missed you," he whispered against your lips before claiming them. His hands roamed your body to find all the places to squeeze and touch while shoving his tongue in your mouth for an amazing kiss. How he went from fun goofy dad to horny teenage in a matter of seconds, you didn't understand, but you also didn't mind.
"Mat, not now. It's the middle of the afternoon," you said between kisses when you could tell this was going to be more than just a make out session.
"So?" He sucked on and kissed your neck. Yeah, what was the problem?
"So? They're both asleep. Hurry up and take me to bed." He didn't need to be told twice and a second later you were up in his arms and enjoying some much needed adult time.
620 notes · View notes
axcel-lucci · 11 months
Note
umm... I have a really weird idea.. how about a scenario with Law x Reader as ASL's sister where they notice a bite/hickey on her neck from him?
please, if you don't like it, ignore it!! thank you in advance (^▽^)
I'll try anon.
Also, cute request!
Don't leave a mark,
Requested by: anon
Trafalgar law x fem!reader
Note: it's in the modern time cause I can't take ace being gone in the og universe :((
(Suggestive)
Tumblr media
"Law..." (Y/n) breathes out a soft pleasurable sigh, "Don't leave a mark. Dummy..."
"I'll do what I want." Law growled before sucking even harder and pulled away with a huff.
"I swear... If this leaves a mark, my brother's will kill you. Especially ace!" She pouted making him chuckle
"Don't worry... I won't die" he grinned sexily, "let's continue this in the bedroom, cause I doubt Bepo would want to see us."
(Y/n) glanced down on the small Pomeranian puppy by their feet
"Yeah... Let's not destroy his innocence.."
...
"ACE! SABO! LUFFY!" (y/n) yelled upon seeing them at the airport.
Law and (y/n) actually moved across the country to be both closer to where Law works because he was relocated and where (y/n) studies college.
(Law here is 24 and (y/n) is 22)
"(Y/n)!!" Luffy yelled and ran over to tackle her
She just staggered for a bit before laughing
"(Y/n)! Look at you, so grown" Sabo smiled before Ace scoffed
"She's still a child to me. Why did we even let her move into this... Bastard..." He grumbled as Sabo elbowed him
"It's much closer to where she aims to study, dumbass." Sabo scoffed.
"Where's Torao?" Luffy asked before jumping off of (y/n)
"He's by the car, he actually has an emergency business call earlier, so he had to take it. He said we could just walk back over there right now." (Y/n) smiled
Ace has squinted his eyes for a bit before gasping, dramatically, I must say.
"What's that on your neck, (y/n)?" Luffy asked cutely as he pointed at a part of his neck where he saw it.
"What?"
"Here, look." Luffy said before handing her a mirror, "right there."
There was a big hickey... "This should've been gone yesterday!" She thought but looked up at Sabo and Ace.
Ace has a dark aura around him ready to kill, whilst Sabo had a smile that would sense they'd kill.
"Guys... Calm down..." (Y/n) said
"Where are you guys parked?" Sabo said, voice dripping with venom.
"U-uhm..."
Later...
Law leaned against the car's hood after finishing his call, he soon heard (y/n) calling him, he looked and saw a raging Ace but a "calm" Sabo while Luffy was excited as ever.
"Law, run!" She called
"What?" Law was confused, of course, before seeing the hickey on her neck making him smile and his eyes widen, giving him the "oh fuck." Expression.
Ace immediately dashed past (y/n) and tried to get to law but since law used to be a fugitive, he just jumped the wired fence and stayed there.
"Law! I told you so!" (Y/n) said as she tried to stop Ace from climbing the fence, but Sabo had already successfully did so.
"Law!" Sabo yelled as law himself jumped and ran as Sabo followed.
Sabo, being a police officer, ran fast, but law used to be a fugitive in his younger years so he just ran as well.
"Law! Be careful!" She yelled
Luffy cheered for law while Ace yelled for Sabi to catch him
Guess law has learned the hard way.
Sorry Law
603 notes · View notes
averyangrypossum · 21 days
Text
Ladies and gentlemen, may I introduce the
Flowerbroadcast AU!
Tumblr media
Based on the two drawings I did of a fankid for the ship radiostatic.
The full-body one
And the one with both Vox and her
And now, I’m gonna tell you all about it and exactly who the fuck this little kid is.
Lotus is the daughter of Vox (as you can tell) and Alastor and is six years old. She was created shortly after Vox and Al broke up, oh yeah I should probably talk about their relationship status. Vox and Alastor, unlike in canon, weren’t only close friends but were dating at some point, mostly because Alastor wanted to manipulate Vox’s feelings to where he’d be more compilable but accidentally took it too far, and since Vox is a piss baby Alastor decided to entertain Vox for a while.
Was this relationship healthy?
NO!
Would Vox say these were the best years of his afterlife?
Yeah.
But anyways, in this au when Vox asks Alastor to “join his team” he was actually proposing and Alastor finally realized,
“Shit maybe this has gone out of hand” and breaks it off with Vox which leaves Vox heartbroken and with an incel breakdown. Now instead of trying to move the fuck on, he has our little darling Lotus, who he has trying to fill the hole that Alastor left.
So obviously having a child for that reason isn’t going to make you a good parent.
Lotus’ relationship with the Vees are as follows in the particular order.
1 Velvette: She does Lotus’s hair everyday and picks out outfits for her to post on her social media before Lotus immediately undos everything that Velvette does and just goes for pigtails and her nightgown. Velvette has wine aunt energy and is probably the only one of the Vees to know how to talk and get through to Lotus.
2 Valentino: Surprising I know, but Lotus doesn’t know what he does to his workers, she knows what he does for work but grew up with thinking that was just something normal since Valentino was never hush hush about his job around her much to Vox’s dismay. Valentino isn’t a big fan of children and doesn’t hang around her often, but sometimes he’ll draw along side her while bitching about a particular show she’s watching even though it’s literally made for kids.
3 Vox: Wow, how bad do you have to fuck up for a pimp who hardly spends time with her to be ranked higher than her own father?? Vox, despite making the conscious decision to have her, isn’t around like at all. Hes a workaholic through and through, and mostly leaves her with nannies and Velvette. Doesn’t mean he doesn’t love her, au contraire he loves her with all his heart and soul. Will give her anything except having quality time with her. He uses her more of an accessory than a child.
Now how exactly Lotus was made is up to you.
A robotic creation Vox made? Sure!
Some voodoo magic shit? Yeah!
Some weird magic thing where she kinda just poofed into existence? Why not!
Mpreg? I mean, do what you wanna do ig?
Cuz it really doesn’t matter!
This whole au starts with Lotus running away from the Vee tower to explore hell since she's basically Rapunzel. She gets lost and terrorized by sinners until our deer Alastor rescues her. Seeing his chance to promote the hotel he takes her there where she is offered to stay there by Charlie when Lotus complains about how bad her dad is. She graciously accepts because shes only six but is going through her “My dad hates me and I hate him” era, which I mean…I would get that impression too if I didn’t see my dad that much.
Wait my dad lives across the country…don't talk to me rn I’m busy dyeing my hair black and becoming emo 🖤
But anyways she stays there while Vox is loosing his fucking mind, and becoming more mentally unstable.
Meanwhile! She's having the time of her life with the hotel's residents and a new father figure who treats her well and pays attention to her! Alastor! Now Al doesn’t know she is his kid, but that doesn't stop him from being a better dad than Vox out of spite!
Anyways, thats all I have, for now! Stay tuned my friends~
Tumblr media
92 notes · View notes
sunraies · 1 year
Note
rafe request — can you please write about reader getting into an accident after a fight with race and rafe getting worried but make it really really dramatic like car accident life threatening, i wanna cry and feel angst 🫢
I mean this in the nicest way possible. I hope this is angst enough to make you cry. If this doesn't work, watch Daisy Jones and The Six. That made me cry today or the Notebook. We all need a good cry sometimes x
You Can Go Your Own Way
Rafe Cameron x Kook!Reader
Warnings- Angst. Car accident. Argument. mentions of a pregnancy scare. Talks about future. Hospital. Coma
As requested above.
-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-
It wasn't even that big of an argument. At least wasn't meant to be until you told Rafe, you couldn't do it anymore.
"What the fuck is that supposed to mean?" He frowned, hurt flooding his eyes that you loved so much.
"I just. We keep going round in circles" You began gathering your things dotted around his room.
"Baby, stop" He tried to gently stop your hands before you moved away from him and continued "Baby, fucking stop!"
"Rafe, it just isn't going to work" You could feel the tears burning in your eyes as they threated to fall.
"It will! I promise" He tried to pull you closer but you resisted, knowing the minute you were in his arms, you would melt.
"Don't make promises you can't keep" You whispered before cutting off his reply "god, Rafe. I love you but we want different things. I'm off to college, and you'll be here, working for Ward."
"I never said I didn't want you to go," He frowned. "All I said was let's get married. "
You looked up to the ceiling before back down at him. "Because of a scare fucking pregnancy, Rafe" You pointed to the test thrown in his bathroom bin, only moments ago "God, your face when you were hoping it was positive. I can't do that. I don't want that. Not right now."
"I know, baby, I know." He ran a hand through his hair, "but I meant it, I would marry you. Not because of a baby but because I fucking love you"
You shook your head and swallowed "I don't want to be some tropy wife. I've seen how it broke my mother. She had so many dreams and I do too. You can't come with me and I can't stay here"
You had always wanted a life bigger than Outerbanks could give you. Collage in New York was that chance. Your heart was torn in two, all because you had fallen in love with Rafe Cameron.
"I love your dreams" Rafe looked like he could cry too. "I want you to live them, baby"
"I can't do that as a married collage student with my husband half way across the country. All I'm asking is that we wait. I can't give you the future you want right now"
"Why wait? It's just a ring. It shows that you are mine." He sighed before your eyes widened. It suddenly twigged, the other reason he had asked you.
"That's it! Fuck Rafe, do you really think that little of me? I'm not going to sleep around!"
"No. No. It's the guys I don't trust" He desperately tried to reach for you as you nodded and picked up the last of your things. "Baby, please"
"I'm not something you can fucking own, Rafe"
You had been together for two years and it was wonderful. Rafe was kind, caring, protective but the one thing that always caused a problem was when the protectiveness turned into possessiveness. A little you could handle, an arm around you at a party, a kiss on temple as you talked to another guy but the fighting, the anger at someone for even looking at you the wrong way, it was too much.
As you stammered your car door and locked it. Rafe ran out to you and hammered on the window. He called out to you, but you drove away, leaving him cursing barefoot in the driveway.
You weren't sure where to go. You couldn't go back home right a way. The moment your mother saw you crying, it would feel too real. Your best friend was most likely in The Cut, and again, if you fall into her arms, it would be too much to bare. You loved her brother so much, it hurt. So you drove into the night to clear your head.
It happened quickly. They say things can change in the blink of an eye. That life is made up of split seconds.
You had been adjusting the volume on the radio as 'Go Your Own Way' by Fleetwood Mac played. It seemed like the sky was crying with you as it began raining heavily.
Your phone lit up with a message distracting you.
Gorgeous 👑 - 'Call me or tell me when you are home safe...'
The rest of the message was cut off.
The name you had given him made you smile at the memory of him finding it. It was a few months into your relationship, even after the years together, you hadn't changed it.
----------------------------
"Why gorgeous? And a crown. " He frowned as he stared at your phone
"Because you're my gorgeous king." You kissed his cheek
"That's fucking cheesy as shit" He teased before you grabbed his phone
"Oh yeah, what's yours, then, huh?" You opened it, smiling at his lock screen of you before finding the contact and laughing "Baby with a red heart? And mine was cheesy"
"Shut up" He blushed before pining you down on the bed as you laughed.
----------------------------
When you glanced back up at the road, all you could do was gasp as yellow headlights blinded you. You tried to swerve but you just felt the car spin out of control on the wet road before the impact of metal hitting metal, the stretching, the boom of air bags, the smell of burnt rubber and the iron taste of blood.
Every nerve in your body screamed as your head felt heavy. Somehow, you ended upside down. You could hear a strangers voice, muffled like it was under water. A buzzing caught your attention as your phone lay broken on the road. Rafe’s face appearing on the screen, his gorgeous smile, broken and cracked as it showed he was calling. It was the last thing you saw before losing conciseness.
*-*-*-*
"Who the fuck are you?" Rafe asked as a male voice was on the other end of the phone.
"Calm down, son." The officer, on the other end, replied, "I'm officer Warron, now I need you to remain calm for moment."
Rafe dropped to the floor, holding his head as Officer Warron told him you had been involved in a road traffic accident and that you had been transferred to the General on the main land in crucial condition. They had contacted him as your mother had told them too, he needed to know. She couldn't bring herself to do it, and he was the last call on your broken phone.
He got to the hospital as quickly as he could, taking the Druthers as fast as it would possibly go. He almost forgot to pay the taxi before following the instructions your mother had messaged.
"Oh, Rafe!" Your tearful mother embraced him as he entered your room. He gently patted her back as he looked over to you.
You looked so broken and fragile in the bed, hooked up to a million machines. He just stared feeling completely numb.
"I know, it looks scary, but they said the surgeries went well. They put. They put her in an induced coma to, to help the healing." Your mother stumbled over her words. "She can hear you"
All Rafe could do was nod before your mother gave him a sad smile. "I'll give you two a moment," she moved to kiss your cheek before speaking to you. "I'm just going to update your dad, sweetie. Rafe's here. He's here."
They both could have sworn your heart beat raised a little at her words before she left.
Rafe stumbled into the seat next to your bed and shakily took your hand. "Shit, baby. I don't. I don't even know what to say, " He whispered. "I'm so sorry. Fuck..."
He suddenly broke down, his head on your arm as he sobbed. The only sounds filling the room were the beeping of your machines and his broken sniffles.
443 notes · View notes
daydreamtofiction · 9 months
Text
Malicious Compliance // Surgeon Strange x Reader
Masterlist | Request a Fic
Summary: After a brief meeting with the world renowned neurosurgeon Doctor Stephen Strange, he plans to make you his latest conquest. He’s only interested in one thing, but that’s okay, because so are you. (female reader)
Word Count: 4.6K
Warnings: Strong language, explicit sexual content, pre-sorcerer Strange (arrogant, cocky). Smut: no strings attached, dominance & praise, oral sex (receiving), light choking, unprotected sex (sort of?). Readers must be 18+
A/N: Just a quick lil oneshot for you all. I literally thought of this today and the whole thing poured out of me in one sitting lmao. I like it though, hope you guys do too!
Tumblr media
His eyes are glaciers. Cold, hard, yet always moving. They flit towards the window, sunlight turning them the crispest blue, then back down to the notebook on the table in front of him. They warm slightly when he looks over to Doctor Palmer, roll languidly whenever Doctor West speaks. But in the end, they always seem to settle back on you.
He’s as hubristic as you’d expected; leant back in his chair, elbows on the armrests, taking up as much space as his body will allow. He corrects a colleague when they call him Stephen. It’s Doctor Strange, he says, voice so deep and rich it’s almost tangible. 
He watches as you press your finger to the inner corner of your eye, trying to rub away the tired itch beginning to take root there. You wonder how offended he’d be if he knew you fell asleep reading one of his published papers last night, how you woke up in your hotel room this morning with your cheek pressed to page seventeen of The Strange Palmer Method. It would make his blood boil, you think, to know his work had been used as a pillow. You resist the urge to tell him. 
Coffee burns the roof of your mouth. You wince and place the cup back down on the boardroom table, sift through the pile of papers in front of you as the room waits for you to speak again.
“Honey,” says Doctor Strange. 
“I’m sorry?” you reply. 
He points to your mouth. “It’ll help with that burn.” 
You stare at him for a moment before shaking your head. “Oh I didn’t- It was just a little warmer than I expected. Thanks, though.” 
The corner of his mouth curls and he turns to look down the length of the table, the flecks of silver at his temple catching in the light.
You clear your throat as you find the document you were looking for. “So, pending approval from the ABMS, we would like to roll out training for the Strange Palmer Method in all of our hospitals.”
“What about my new technique for stent placement?” asks Doctor West. 
“Oh please, Nic,” Strange scoffs. “We’re talking about actual revolutionary surgical procedures here.” 
Doctor West’s back straightens, you open your mouth to speak but he gets there first.
“Excuse me, my stent technique could drastically cut down the amount of time a patient’s brain is open on the table! Do you even realise-” 
“Mhm, why don’t you go win some awards and make national news, then maybe we can talk.” 
Doctor Palmer’s head falls into her hands as the other surgeons groan and shift uncomfortably in their seats. You’ve met your fair share of asshole surgeons in this job; travelling up and down the country stroking egos and exalting god complexes. But this man sitting across from you is, without a doubt, the victor of them all. 
“The stent technique is very interesting,” you say, easing the tension in the room. “But we would need to see the results of a study or trial of some kind before taking it any further.” 
“Very diplomatic of you,” says Strange. 
“Not diplomatic. I just know a promising procedure when I see it.”
“Hm. Are you a doctor?”
Your gaze turns to a glare. “I am.” 
“Where do you practice?”
“I don’t anymore. My job is to keep other doctors at the top of their game. Hence why I’m here right now with all of you.”
He’s almost smirking, head cocked slightly, twiddling a pen between his fingers. It’s fitting, you think, to see a surgeon take such pleasure in getting under people’s skin. 
You hate that you find him attractive. That you’ve managed to fall victim to a charm buried so deep beneath layers of pure arrogance that you have to dig to find it. If he wasn’t so beautiful on the outside, you’re almost certain you wouldn’t bother fighting to find something redeemable within. But the way your body reacts to him; the warmth, the buzzing deep in your belly, it must be there. 
The meeting finishes and you remain at the table, straightening the wad of papers in front of you and slotting them back into your binder as everyone filters out of the room. When you’re alone, you stand and walk to the large window, taking a moment to gaze out at the view. Your eyes skim New York City, admiring the blend of old and new; small stone buildings wedged between tall skyscrapers, the late afternoon sun glinting across metal and glass, pockets of green peppered amongst brick and mortar. You wish you got to come here more often. 
You pick up your briefcase and drape your jacket over your arm as you make your way out of the boardroom. The corridor is bright and quiet, but the bustling of the hospital is a low hum. You close the door behind you and begin to walk, unfazed by the sight of a figure leaning against the wall up ahead. 
His arms are folded over his broad chest, dark blue scrubs doing little for his tall, robust frame. His legs are crossed at the ankles as he rests his weight back against the wall, head stooped slightly, but his eyes are on you. 
“Doctor Strange,” you say with a polite nod as you continue past him.
He smiles, allows you to pass, but you feel him move behind you. 
“You don’t really think Doctor West’s procedure holds any merit?” he asks, catching up to walk at your side. 
“I do.” You furrow your brow. “You don’t think there’s merit in improving the efficiency of existing surgeries?” 
He shrugs. “Just not all that exciting when you compare it to what I’m doing.” 
“You mean what you and Doctor Palmer are doing…” 
There’s a chuckle deep in his throat, like he enjoys the back and forth, watching his opponents fight for their lives while to him it’s just a sparring match. He quickens his pace to slip in front of you, turning to face you and forcing you to halt in the middle of the corridor. 
“Be honest,” he says. “You’re impressed.” 
“Of course we’re impressed. Why else would the board have sent me here?” 
“No I mean you, specifically.” 
You glare up at him, hiding your amusement with an eye roll. “Yes, Doctor,” you say slowly, your words empty and biting. “I am very impressed.” 
His cupid’s bow deepens as his lips curve into a self satisfied smile, lines forming in his cheeks and the corners of his eyes. He knows you find him infuriating, but it only seems to encourage him. There’s a moment of silence, long enough for his gaze to trail the length of you, just once. 
“You know, I’d love to talk more with you about it,” he says, looking down at his obviously expensive watch. “Maybe over dinner. Have you eaten?” 
You draw in a deep breath through your nose, letting it out in a sigh as you begin to speak. “I don’t need your superficial attempts to woo me, Doctor.” You reach into your briefcase and pull out a pen and a business card, scrawling on the back of it and handing it to him. “This is where I’m staying. Come by around eight.” 
You’re certain he’s going to protest, pretend he actually wants to go to dinner, talk, that he was ever interested in anything that didn’t involve the removal of your clothes. You wait in suspense as his eyes flit down to the card in his hand, then back up to your face.
“I prefer to fuck in my own bed,” he says bluntly. 
A wave crashes in your stomach, rushing down into your core, the sensation so strong and unexpected that your knees almost buckle. This isn’t the first time one of your work trips has ended in you going home with a surgeon, but the way this one doesn’t try to feign the ‘nice guy’, doesn’t pretend to want anything more from you than your body, that’s new.  
“Unless I’m on vacation, of course,” he adds with a cocky smile. 
“Of course…” 
He flips the card over and plucks the pen from your hand. You watch as he scribbles on it and hands it back to you. 
“So this is where I’ll be tonight,” he says. “You said eight works for you?”  
You press your tongue to the inside of your cheek, unsure if you’ve ever met anyone as imperious as this. You slip the card into your pocket and move to walk past him, stopping as your shoulders brush and looking up at him. 
“I hope your dick is as inflated as your ego.”
He smirks to himself, remaining quiet as you continue to walk away. 
Tumblr media
Your skirt is riding up your backside. You reach back to yank it down for the hundredth time before pressing the buzzer on the wall of the apartment building. The setting sun is just a glow beneath the horizon but the streets are still busy, the air warm with a pleasant breeze. You lean back to stare up at the building, the mirrored windows stretching so high you can’t see an end to them. You wonder which one is his. 
There’s a scratching sound on the intercom, followed by a deep voice. “Yeah?” 
“It’s me,” you say, glancing over your shoulders as if you’re on some kind of secret mission, scared of being seen. 
He doesn’t speak again, instead there’s a quick buzz followed by the click of the heavy front door. You let yourself inside, heels clacking against the glossy marble floor as you hurry towards the elevators. When the doors slide open, you pull out your business card, punch in the floor number he’d scrawled in the bottom corner. It begins to ascend, making your already swirling stomach turn. 
You pull down the back of your skirt again as you step out into the hall, peering down the length of it in search of his apartment. The door is tall and wide, dark timber and a heavy metallic handle. You knock but your knuckles barely make a sound, the dense wood swallowing the echo. 
Still, he comes. You regard him quietly as you step inside, the snug sweater and tailored jeans, a pair of sneakers making you feel entirely overdressed. He’s already grinning; a smug, confident smile that reignites the ire in your chest. You ignore him and walk further in, eyes wide in awe at the vast, industrial space.
You walk over to the window that stretches the length of the apartment, floor to ceiling, wall to wall, framing a perfect snapshot of the city. 
“Now I understand why you make the women come to you,” you say. 
“Hm?” 
“This place. It’s impressive.” You glance over your shoulder at him. “That’s the point, right? You like to impress. To show off.”  
He laughs quietly and makes his way to the kitchen area, opening the extensive liquor cabinet. “You want something to drink?” 
“I have rules,” you say abruptly, turning around to face him from across the echoey room.
He straightens. “Go on…” 
“Nothing that happens here can be used for any type of professional leverage, good or bad, by either of us.” 
“Of course-”
“This isn’t a date. I don’t spend the night, I don’t keep in touch, I don’t call when I’m back in town so we can do this again. This is just tonight. And it’s just sex. Understood?” 
“Understood.” He returns to the cabinet and takes out a bottle. “So, about that drink…”
You’re already gone, wandering off through a door at the rear of the apartment in search of the bedroom. 
You find it. It’s a dark, cave-like space, large curtains draped across another huge window, only the faintest glow of the sunset fighting through the fabric. It’s clinical, just as you’d expect from a surgeon; sleek furniture void of any clutter or knick knacks, exposed brick walls with the occasional piece of art - no photographs. There’s a full length mirror, a small couch, and a bed so large you could sink into it and disappear. You wonder just how many women have delved beneath those sheets before you. 
He appears in the doorway, looking you up and down. “You’re eager, little one,” he teases.
You roll your eyes, watching as he closes the door behind him and approaches you. You reach up to touch him, to kiss him, but instead he takes your wrists in his hands and lowers them back to your sides. 
“Mm, not yet.” 
You scoff in dispute, eyes following him as he strolls across the room and switches on the wall sconces, illuminating the area above the bed in a dim, warm light. 
“Look,” you say. “If you’re just going to mess with me then-”
“Well actually, after you left the hospital this afternoon, I got called to consult on a patient and ended up having to stay late. I just got home around fifteen minutes before you knocked on my door. So if you don’t mind, I would like to take a shower first. Is that alright with you?” he finishes sarcastically. 
You settle down, composing yourself and relaxing your shoulders. “Of course.” 
“Make yourself comfortable.” 
He pushes open a door to the right and you catch a glimpse of the luxurious, marbled master bathroom as he steps inside. The door closes behind him, leaving you alone again. You stand there for a moment, listening to him whistling to himself, his belt buckle unfastening and hitting the floor. Water bursts from the shower, the sound like soft static, and you immediately rush over to the mirror. 
You examine yourself carefully; fix your hair, press your nose to your skin and clothes, shift your underwear so it sits smoothly and undetectable beneath your skirt. Then you sit down at the foot of the bed, knee bouncing impatiently. You change your mind shortly after, moving to the small couch opposite the bed instead. 
Ten minutes or so pass, but it feels like an eternity. You picture him drawing it out on purpose, working the lather into his skin one section at a time, scrubbing at his hair for much longer than necessary, just to make you sweat. The water shuts off and you listen to him singing to himself, the hum of his voice through the door. When the door finally opens, steam escapes into the bedroom, the rich smell of citrus and cedar filling the air as he walks out, still humming quietly. 
You glance over at him, mouth falling open slightly to find him completely naked, your gaze falling immediately to the pronounced length hanging from his body as he pads across the room. You look away quickly, rolling your eyes and huffing with indignation. Of course he’s naked, you think, he likes to spar, and you’ve willingly stepped into the ring.
Droplets sit on his shoulders and roll down his torso as he moves around the bed. He climbs on and lays down right in the middle, hands resting behind his head, propped up slightly on the headboard. His hair is still damp, half-coiffed, the grey at his temples darker than it was before. His body is solid, the mystery beneath the scrubs now revealed to you in all its glory. His arms are thick as they flex either side of his head, divots of muscle creating shadows across his torso, cock resting proudly on his thigh as he parts his legs in wait. He’s exquisite, and you can’t help but bask in the sight. 
“So,” he says casually. “Are you just going to stay over there looking at me? Or are you going to come and sit on my face?” 
You glare at him, unamused. 
“What?” he shrugs gently. “You’re the one that said this was strictly sex. Forgive me for abiding by your rules.” 
“There’s a word for that, you know,” you reply. “Malicious compliance.”
“Mm, is it really malicious if I’m offering to eat you out?”
“Depends how good you are at it.” 
“Come here and find out.”  There’s no humour in his tone, but it’s still playful, like he’s goading you. 
You stand up and take a step towards the bed. 
“Clothes,” he demands. 
You stop, pressing your lips together tightly. His eyes never leave you, remaining locked on yours as you kick off your shoes and untuck your top from the waistband of your skirt. 
“They should study you,” you say. 
“Study me?” 
“Yeah.” You lift your top over your head and throw it to the floor, reaching down to unzip your skirt. “Look into how one singular person could possibly be such an ass.” 
“Clearly there’s a part of you that likes it, y’know, since you’re here… taking your clothes off for me.”
“What can I say? I’m partial to a surgeon. Think it’s the hands.” 
The skirt pools at your feet and you step out of it, extending your arms as if to say ‘ta da’. He smiles. 
No one has ever looked at you like this. So intense, like he’s studying every inch; relishing in every freckle and blemish, every curve and crease, mapping out the places he plans to touch, taste, explore. 
You continue towards him but he raises his palm, halting you again. “You haven’t finished,” he says. 
You glance down at yourself, then back up to him, letting out a grumbling sigh as you reach behind you to unclasp your bra. It pops open, the release of pressure on your skin as soothing as a deep breath. His gaze darkens as you slide the straps off your shoulders, watching your nipples harden as you reveal your bare breasts to him. 
“These too?” you ask, hooking your thumbs into the waistline of your underwear. 
“Mhm.” 
You take them off as gracefully as you can, shimmying them over your hips and thighs and kicking them away. His cock is hardening, swelling and rising towards his stomach. Your mouth twitches with a triumphant smile, but you suppress it as you climb onto the bed, crawling up to meet him. 
You lean down and press your lips to his, feeling your skin prick, arousal kindling in your core. His mouth is smart, but it’s also divine. The feeling intensifies, spreading through your belly and pounding between your legs as you sweep your tongue into his open mouth, feel his restraint wavering as your hot breaths mingle. You let your chest press against his, the feeling of skin on skin making you burn with need. 
You bring a hand up to his face, he brings his to your throat, bracketing it gently and peeling his mouth from yours. 
“I didn’t tell you to kiss me,” he says quietly. “I told you to sit on my face.” 
You pull back a little more, making eye contact, breathless as a million comebacks shutter through your mind. But in the end you say nothing, letting out a soft huff and slowly shifting your body up the bed.
You hold the top of the extravagant headboard with both hands and swing one leg over him, straddling his shoulders as his fingers reach up behind you to the small of your back. His touch is electric, lips searing as they plant a kiss on your inner thigh. A soft whimper escapes you in a breath, as though anticipation is its own foreplay. 
He wraps his arms around the backs of your thighs and pulls you down onto his mouth. Your grip tightens on the headboard, fingernails digging into the soft, cushiony fabric as he parts his lips against your centre, sucking softly on your already throbbing clit. Your head falls back when his tongue drags up the length of your slit, moulding itself to every pucker and groove, lapping you up like he adores you, and you wonder how many women have fallen for him in these moments. 
You groan quietly, closing your eyes as you focus on the flicks and strokes of his tongue, the sucking and swirling, the hums deep in his throat and he devours you. Your clit is sensitive, making you shudder, the pleasure so intense you can barely stand it. Your body raises up instinctively, but he tightens his hold on you, spitting on your clit and returning his mouth to the place that both aches and sings, somehow at the same time. 
You gasp in response, eyelids fluttering as you swear under your breath. He releases one of your thighs and you glance over your shoulder to see his hand wrapping around his cock. He begins to stroke it forcefully, working himself to the rhythm of his mouth, and you almost fall to pieces. 
“Oh my god,” you moan, slumping forward and pressing your forehead to the headboard. 
Your thighs clamp around his head, but it only spurs him on, making him bury his face deeper, and you can’t remember the last time he came up for air.
“I can’t,” you whisper. 
The nerves in your clit are screaming, dancing on the precipice between pain and pleasure. He continues to lap at your centre, pushing you to the edge until you’re clinging on for dear life. Pressure swells in your core, flooding you with a tingling heat that softens your bones and turns you to liquid. Until finally you’re there, falling, melting. 
He growls as your body begins to shake, working his tongue over you one last time before releasing you from his grasp. You collapse next to him, sliding down the pillows until you’re lying at his side. You’re breathless, chest rising and falling heavily as you stare up at the ceiling. 
He rolls onto his side to face you. “You’re quiet when you come,” he says, placing a kiss into the crook of your neck, another at the dip of your collarbone.  
“I’ve spent the past two years practically living in hotel rooms,” you reply. “I’ve learned to be inconspicuous.” 
“Hm.” He props himself up on his forearm and leans over you, his other hand trailing softly down the side of your body. “Let’s see if we can do something about that.” 
Before you can reply, he’s kissing you. His mouth is slick, it tastes of you. Your body is spent, limbs heavy, yet still you find it responding to his touch. He shifts further onto you, spreading your legs with his hands and settling himself between them. You can feel his cock nudging your centre as he rocks his hips, sliding along the soaking wet mess he left there and brushing his head over your clit. It’s sensitive, raw, makes you gasp. But he swallows the sound with a heady kiss.
He’s big. Thick. Hard. Maybe that’s where he stores his arrogance. He continues to tease you, soaking himself in the mix of spit and slick as he wraps his hands around your neck, kisses you so deeply you can feel him drawing a moan from your throat.
He pulls away and looks down at you for a moment. “Condom?” he asks casually.
You’re on the pill. Have been since you were seventeen. But still, you know you should say yes. Yesterday, this man was a stranger; a face you only knew from TV and the medical articles you’d read.
“No.” You shake your head and reach down, gripping his cock and directing it into you.
He chuckles, the sound deep and low. “What a good girl.” 
You sigh as he teases at your entrance, pushing the head of his cock in and out but never breaking all the way through. 
“Were you thinking about this today in the meeting?” he taunts softly. 
You groan and buck your hips, desperate for him to take you. 
He eases back slightly and tuts. “I saw you squirming in your seat. How hot and flustered you got when I looked at you. Tell me how much you wanted this.” 
“What I wanted,” you begin quietly. “Was to wring your neck.” 
The corner of his mouth curls into a smirk. “Really…” 
“Really.” 
He squeezes his fingers gently around your throat and you exhale softly. The desire is almost painful, your core throbbing, pussy aching. 
“Funny how things work out,” he says. 
You let out a stifled moan as he sinks into you, filling you so completely you’re certain you can’t take it.
“That’s it,” he mutters as he looks down, watching his cock disappear all the way to the hilt. 
You whimper and tighten around him. He sucks the air in through his teeth, returning his gaze to your eyes with a mischievous smile. 
“I’m gonna need you to not do that,” he says. “You’ll have me finishing in seconds.” 
“Are you telling me the great Doctor Stephen Strange lacks self discipline?” You contract your walls again, this time on purpose.
He bows, forehead resting on your chest, and growls deep in the back of his throat. Then suddenly, without warning, he draws his hips back and buries himself in you again. You gasp, fingers digging into the blades of his shoulders as he repeats his thrusts, building to a firm, steady rhythm. 
A small cry escapes you; a sound you’ve never heard yourself make before. He hums in response, keeping you pinned to the bed with his hands around your neck as he snaps his hips, punishing you from the inside out. 
“Wrap those legs around my back,” he demands. 
You do as you’re told, locking your ankles and gasping as he sinks further, the head of his cock kissing the deepest parts of you and sending jolts of pure electricity through your stomach. 
“You’re going to break me,” you whisper.
“Not this time. Maybe later,” he replies, still so arrogant it makes you want to reach up and slap him. 
But your hands are stuck to his back, nails digging into the smooth, taut flesh. Another unfamiliar sound falls from your lips, somewhere between a grunt and a hum. He likes it, you can tell in the way he closes his eyes to compose himself.
“Jesus,” he hisses.
His movements begin to stutter and he rests his forehead against yours. You feel his cock throbbing, your pussy growing wetter until it’s dripping. He lets out a long, satisfied groan and begins to slow down, every rock of his hips like the promise of another climax. 
“Don’t stop,” you whisper desperately. “Please don’t stop, I’m so close.”
He doesn’t open his eyes, but still he obliges; continuing to stroke into you as you squirm beneath him.
“Oh god,” you groan. “Harder. I need- harder.” 
He grunts, screwing his eyes shut tightly, and begins pounding his cock into you with such force you can feel your body shifting up the mattress. You know he already came, you know how sensitive he must be. But somehow, knowing that makes this all the more delicious.
The electricity builds again, every thrust like a lightning strike through your core. Your legs begin to shake and you finally let go, giving in to the current and letting it course through you. Your orgasm is intense, sharp and tingly, making you shudder, body stiffening until it passes. 
He slows to a stop, resting his full weight on top of you. You welcome the pressure, like a weighted blanket; warm and grounding, soothing the ache beginning to settle in your limbs. 
After a few moments, he slides out of you carefully, rolling over to lie at your side. “You want that drink now?” he asks. 
Hair sticks to your forehead with sweat, you brush it back, sucking in deep breaths as you stare up at the ceiling. “No, I’m good.” 
Silence envelops you, neither one of you speaking again until your hearts stop thumping. 
“So… I guess this means you’re going to approve the training for my method,” he says. 
You turn your head, glaring at him in stunned silence. 
“I’m kidding,” he says with a smile, greatly amusing himself. 
“God, surgeons are assholes,” you mutter.
Tumblr media
388 notes · View notes
ingravinoveritas · 27 days
Note
Tumblr media
Firstly i dont think she adjusted since moving to the UK what do u think?
And secondly this post feels that its all about her again like and the character is based on her in real life but the project was longed talk about in 2017 as michael said on the Graham norton show to which michael was with Sarah at that point. It's again trying to be the centre of attention again and stay irrelevant just cos she not getting it from michael
What ur thoughts on this recent of post of Al
So, apologies that it took me all week to answer this--I feel like the entirety of the month of February has just caught up with me, which essentially feels like a lot of tiredness hitting all at once.
I did see this on Monday, however, and I just...am again at something of a loss. I got a bit down on myself over my response to her Insta story from the first preview of Nye and thinking I was overreacting/reading too much into things...and then this happens.
The first thing I would say is that I agree with you that AL is making it all about her again. The post itself comes across as PR, which it likely was because Georgia also shared the same clip that day--albeit with a caption that was actually about Michael/centered on the show. And the contrast becomes even more stark when you look at this post from Caroline Sheen. Caroline is Michael's cousin and she had a small role in The Way, and her post is much more personal and essentially what you would expect from someone who is close to someone in the production. Which subsequently makes AL's post look even more like PR in comparison.
But I think what irritates me the most about Anna's post is that it's yet another instance of her making a dig at Wales. Talking of patterns as I tend to do, she did this previously in September of last year (the #FromManhattantoTonypandy hashtag), and in both of these cases it's her reminding everyone of where she lived before, and likely where she still wishes she lived. In thinking of your initial question, AL may have adjusted to Wales in some ways, but it's clearly not where she belongs or thinks she belongs. I've written previously on my blog about her likely thinking she would be living the celebrity life in New York or London, and Wales was almost certainly a place she didn't even know existed until Michael. So this entire post feels like it's tinged with passive-aggressive resentment as a result.
Let me be clear: In no way do I think that moving to a new country is an easy thing, and it is more than understandable that someone might not love every single thing about the place in which they live, especially if they are an outsider coming from a completely different culture. But the thing is, The Way is literally about Wales. It is entirely focused on Welsh identity and history, and it is a project into which Michael has poured a tremendous amount of his passion and energy and time, which speaks to what you mentioned about him talking about this since 2017.
Why, then, would you make such a snarky comment on a post promoting a show so centered on Wales? That your own partner directed, no less? At best, it comes across as thoughtless and self-centered, and at worst, as deliberately disrespectful.
I can also fully understand why Michael put out a tweet of his own promoting the second episode less than an hour after Anna posted that story. If we are to say that Georgia is a good representative for David on social media--which she arguably is, most of the time--then Anna, by contrast, is the worst possible representative for Michael. And a post like the one above only further highlights how mismatched and wrong for each other they truly are. I also think it's pained him to refrain from tweeting for this long, and now he finally has a reason to start again, for which both we and Michael can be thankful.
So yes, those are my thoughts on AL's story from earlier this week. Glad to hear from my followers as well about your reactions to this. Thank you for writing in! x
57 notes · View notes
remedyx · 4 months
Text
Tumblr media
Last Christmas
Summary: It's been a year, but I'm still not over you...
Pairing: Hongjoong x Reader
WC: 1,562
Warnings: Not much. A little angst. Some reconciliation. Overall just reader and Hongjoong not over one another.
Tumblr media
I used to be excited for the holidays. But now the twinkling lights only served to deepen the darkness that shrouded me rather than disperse it. I sighed, pulling my coat a little tighter around me to fend off the cold as I stared up at the neon sign above the convenience store. Being back here after a year was a little bittersweet. It was nice seeing my family after so long, but it also served as a constant reminder of everything I had left behind a year ago. Or more precisely, the person I had left behind.
Christmas was always our favorite holiday. Not only because we’d both get time off of work and be able to spend time with our friends and families, but also each other. The one time of year where nothing came between us. We’d spend the entire week leading up to Christmas Day with one another. It had sort of become a tradition in the years we’d been together. Maybe that’s why I had found my feet already carrying me this direction before I could really notice where I was going. This particular store sat almost exactly half the distance between our apartments.
Or it did until I had packed up and moved halfway across the country. My job was the reason I had left, and things ended between us.
I couldn’t stay in a place that didn’t offer me a chance to climb the ranks in my profession, but I also couldn’t ask Hongjoong to drop everything for me. Not when he was doing so well for himself. I had considered it. Asking him to go with me. But as if fate itself had a hand in my decision, he had been promoted the day I meant to talk with him about it. And the excitement in his eyes was something I couldn’t bring myself to dim with my own problems. That would’ve been incredibly selfish of me. Granted, the conversation following was the hardest one I’d ever had in my life.
My excuse had been that we were at different points in our lives. That I wasn’t ready to settle down. I couldn’t tell him the truth. The last thing I wanted him to believe was that the issue was with him or his job. Because that wasn’t true. I was the one who wasn’t satisfied where I was. I needed more, wanted to pursue more. Some crummy desk job for the rest of my life wasn’t what I had planned for myself. It broke my heart. And the way his face fell as I told him, and his eyes turned glassy, I could tell it had done the same to him.
It had been a year, but the wound was still fresh. I still loved him. I don’t think I ever would stop loving him. A whole year and I still tear up any time our memories popped up on my phone. I huffed, noticing how my breath clouded in the air as I ducked into the store. My feelings that were never too far from the surface were probably why I found myself in this store again. As if the past twelve months never happened. The only difference is that I didn’t have Hongjoong with me like I would have in the past. Even though so much has happened since the last time I set foot in here, this place was the same.
Almost like I was on autopilot, I mosied my way towards the back of the store. The store was warm, the heat already seeping through my cold body as I made my way down a familiar aisle. I paused in front of the small selection of baking items they put out every year. My eyes instantly gravitated towards the marshmallows placed right next to the peppermint bark.
“You do realize marshmallows are like, the most basic thing you could include in your hot chocolate?” I snorted, teasing Hongjoong as I stole one before he could drop them into his mug.
“Not basic. Classic. Besides, you’re one to talk. Peppermint is a close second.” He grinned, throwing another marshmallow at me.
The package in front of me was blurry as tears gathered along my waterline. I blinked several times, sniffing hoping to stave them off as I reached out to grab the same peppermint bark I always did. I paused as another hand reached out for the marshmallows on the other side of me at the same time. Our arms crossing over one another. I looked over in surprise, my heart nearly leaping out of my chest as I recognized the face partially hidden behind his scarf.
“Hongjoong?”
Little tufts of blonde hair poked out from underneath his beanie. The color a startling contrast to the dark chocolate it had been when we were together. His eyes widened at the sound of his name, the dark irises looking just as shocked as I was.
“Y/N? You’re back?”
“Erm, yeah. I came back to see everyone for the holidays.”
I knew I had missed him. But physically seeing him in front of me, looking just as handsome as ever and not just a figment of memory was like a punch to the gut. One that knocked the breath out of me completely when he pulled his scarf down just enough to show me the beautiful smile I used to be on the receiving end of nearly every day.
“What a coincidence running into you here then!”
“Yeah.” I laughed humorlessly.
His smile quickly faded into an expression of confusion as he looked at me.
“But wait, what are you doing here? Don’t your parents live further from here?”
I smiled wryly, a small huff escaping my lips as I picked up the bag of peppermint bark.
“Yeah, they do. I came for this.” I lied, waving the bag between us.
“Peppermint. Of course.” He chuckled, reaching forward to grab the bag of marshmallows he always got. “I guess some things never change.”
I hummed, nodding at the bag. “Guess not. You still come all the way over here even when there’s a store right outside your building.”
It was his turn to flash a sardonic smile.
“It’s tradition.” He shrugged, smile dropping as his eyebrows pinched together in the expression I recognized as him debating about whether what he was about to say should be said or not. “And… I wasn’t ready to spend Christmas without you.”
My breath lodged in my throat as I slowly looked back at him. He chewed on the edge of his bottom lip, eyes flickering from the floor to me nervously.
“I know you probably don’t want to hear it and I’m sure after an entire year, you’ve put it behind you, but I can’t. Your mom told me why you left.”
It was hard to meet his eyes. So, I let my gaze drop to the bag in my hands as he continued.
“At first I was really mad at you.” He chuckled dryly. “I was mad because it felt like you were making a decision for me. You didn’t give me an opportunity to consider it for myself.”
I flinched. His sorrow piercing my heart. Making me feel even worse than I have been since that night. The guilt ready to eat me from the inside out.
“I’m sorry.”
I finally gathered the courage to look at him through my lashes. His features softening as he stepped closer to me.
“It took me a while, but I understand why you did it. I might have made the same call if our roles were reversed. And once I got past my anger, I just missed you. I miss you so damn much. I miss you calling me and asking me if I’d had lunch and telling me about your day. I miss having you over for movie nights and dinners. I miss holding you and kissing you. And the closer Christmas came, it just got worse. This is our holiday Y/N. There is no cheer or warmth or happiness for me without you in it.”
I couldn’t stop the tears. They overflowed and kept coming no matter how much I tried to keep them in. Hongjoong caved, his arms wrapping around me and pulling me in, soft reassurances falling from his lips. I could have crumbled at the comfort he provided. These last twelve months had been some of the toughest in my life and not having him beside me for them was even worse. He was my rock and shelter. I didn’t realize just how much support we shared between one another until I no longer had it. And thinking back on it now, choosing to end things the way I did was the biggest mistake of my life.
Not only did I hurt myself, but also him. I could’ve kicked myself for doing that to him. Especially when he was someone who didn’t deserve it.
“Come home with me.” He whispered, laying his cheek on top of my head. “We can figure things out in the morning but let me have tonight. Let’s spend Christmas together like we always do.”
“With hot chocolate and marshmallows?” I sniffled, laughing.
“And peppermint bark.” He chuckled, grabbing a box of it too.
I nodded, taking his hand as he pulled away. “Okay. Let’s go home.”
There is no taglist for this series.
Back to Masterlist | Next
83 notes · View notes
iluvnewports · 3 months
Text
Canary
An AU one-shot of Butcher from The Boys where years after Becca dies, he finds himself fighting his feelings for you and finally gives in. + fluff & angst
minors dni
Tumblr media
“You were always like my canary, I suppose.” Butcher breathes out painfully as he looks over to you across the console. “I knew when I couldn’t hear you anymore I had gone too deep.”
You have half a mind to slap him upside his head, gripping his stupid beach shirt by its collar to hoist him up from leaning against the door. “Stop talking like that.”
“Like what?”
“Like you’re fucking dying.” You place both your hands back on the wheel, making a sharp turn that makes Butcher groan. “You’re going to be fine.” You look over to his blood-soaked pants and his bloodied hands atop it.
“Keep your fucking hands on it, Butcher, Christ.” You look between his hands and the road. You knew it was only a matter of time until his luck ran out and something didn’t go his way. You’re the most wanted criminals in the country for fucks sake, it was only a matter of time. Everyone wants your head.
“Oi, stop fucking shouting, they didn’t shoot my ears out.” Butcher barks at you as you make another hasty turn which causes yet another groan. Serves him right, snapping at you like that, all when you only care about his well-being.
“Just shut up.” You slam on the brakes a little harsher than you should’ve so he lunges forward a little with a pained groan. Pulled up next to the curb, you hastily unbuckle your seatbelt, turning to look at Butcher who’s already staring daggers at you.
“Can’t even let a tender moment stop you from being a cunt, can ya?”
You smile, one corner tugging up further than the other. “There he is.”
You move around to the other side of the car and help the injured man out, escorting him down the steps as he wobbles on his hurt leg. You kick open the door swiftly, though it’s not anything impressive as it is more of a small nudge, heads turning as you two sleuth into the dingy basement.
“Jesus Christ, Butcher!” M.M jumps up from his seat as Hughie looks around panicked, unsure what to do he stands up and grabs the back of his head, mouth hanging open as he stutters.
Kimiko’s brows raise as Frenchie mutters a curse, everyone rushing to their feet to help guide Butcher to the table. He’s practically pulled from your arms and you feel a bit defensive at this, furrowing your brows as you almost pull him straight back into your grip. It’s as if he isn’t as safe unless he’s in your hands.
“What happened?”
“Vought happened.” You murmur, helping Butcher sit down in the chair, his pained groans not particularly worrisome to you until now. You grab his shoulder in comfort, watching as M.M assesses his leg.
“Butcher the bullet is still in there, there’s no exit wound.” He props his leg on another chair, cutting the fabric of his pants around the wound. Blood pools around the wound, his leg hair around it turning slick and red as flesh pokes out around the bullet wound, crimson red flesh peeling like a lotus flower around the gaping hole.
“So, what, you’re going to dig into his leg?” Hughie looks as if he’s breaking out in a cold sweat as he swallows dryly, his voice becoming high-pitched with worry.
“What the hell you want me to do, huh?” M.M raises his arms in question before pointing back to Butcher’s leg. “Just leave it in there?”
“I don’t know—! Shouldn’t we get him to a hospital?”
“No!” You, M.M, Frenchie, and Butcher all say in unison.
“Hughie, go find your nuts, they’re probably hidden beneath your twat, and fuck off,” Butcher says roughly, head thrown back as he winces. M.M is quick to sterilize a pair of forceps, pulling around his spinning chair. He pours alcohol on his leg without warning, causing Butcher to grit his teeth and wail out a “Fuck!”
You grab his hand, your palms clasping together with a squeeze as you cling to his arm as if you’re the one getting a bullet dug out of you. You rub his shoulder gently as your other hand clasps his, watching as M.M digs the forceps into his leg, causing Butcher to jerk and startle. Frenchie grabs his other side, trying to keep him still.
“Be still, Mon Ami.” Frenchie says as delicately as always.
“You wanna swap fucking seats then?” Butcher snaps. He’s always so curt, so rude, and you all just withstand it. Because, hey: that’s just Butcher.
You give his hand a squeeze, signaling him to ease up a little. He only grunts, shooting you a look. He doesn’t say anything, though. M.M continues digging around, tongs deep in his leg as the handle sits at an awkward angle.
“I found it.” He murmurs, squinting his eyes as he pushes the two handles together with a tugging motion.
“Fucking hell!” Butcher curses as his head falls backward, hair falling into his face as sweat beads his chest, which you can see since his top two buttons were popped off. Eyebrows pulled together and eyelids crinkled close, you allow your eyes to wander down his glimmering chest. His pecs are large, which you’ve always loved in a man, even the harsh lamp light making his skin look appealing. He’s just so… rough. In a good way. His body carries stories, tales of the past, tales of how hard his life has been and what he’s carried, what he’s endured.
M.M gives another harsh tug to no avail, causing Butcher to curse again. “Just fucking pull it out!” You yell, feeling nauseated. Not because of the scene, but because it’s him.
“I’m fucking trying, Jesus!” M.M snaps at you, whipping his head up to meet your eyes. “Do you want to try? Since you’re such an expert all of a sudden.”
“I’m just saying—!”
“For fucks sake don’t yell at her.” Butcher defends, which causes M.M to quiet down. Your eyes snap to him, unsure how you feel about it all. He’s always been a bit… defensive over you? It makes you feel almost embarrassed like you can’t handle yourself.
M.M is quiet for a moment as Butcher groans more, shrugging Frenchie off of him with a small “fuck off,” as he stares down the barrel of his leg as M.M grips the handles and slowly pulls out of the wound, presenting a bullet dripping in gore, clanging against the metallic dish he throws it into. The blood flows off the bullet, saline becoming pink as crimson floats upwards in a somewhat beautiful pattern.
M.M is quick to grab his needle and suture as he begins stitching the wound up, murmuring something under his breath as Butcher tilts his head back to look up into your eyes, hazel as beautiful as any moss-covered tree. You feel a chill at your side as your heart warms under his gaze. It’s not completely foreign to you but this time, it’s more intense.
You both pull your hands apart slowly, your touch lingering longer than necessary. You lift your head, noticing M.M looks at your hands and back up to you. He says nothing, shooting a look you can’t exactly decipher, shooting Butcher a look.
Butcher, never one to be the silent type, also says nothing.
“You’re gonna be sore, but you’ll live.” M.M breathes out a murmur, wrapping up his tools into a cloth before discarding the bloodied gauze.
“Fan-fucking-tastic.”
“I don’t need a fucking babysitter.” Butcher slices his hand through the air firmly, tilting his head and raising his brows as he nods in confirmation. “Right.”
“Butcher, Jesus, it’s just a few days, stop being such a baby.” You collapse onto the dirty couch and tuck your legs beneath you as you curl into the corner. You pat the cushion next to you. “C’mon. That old Translucent movie is up next…” You trail off with a smile. Butcher wobbles closer, groaning as he rolls his eyes.
“I’m glad the old cunt died before he could make a sequel.” Butcher stands nearby, watching the TV. “I feel fine, it don’t even hurt.”
“You’re wobbling, you can hardly walk.” You pat the cushion again, though harsher this time. “C’mon, sit. Even super badass wanted criminals need a day off.”
Butcher groans but eventually walks over and sits beside you, maybe just a few inches away, your legs almost touching. He puts his arm up to rest on the back of the couch almost wrapping around you. The silence is comfortable, endearing.
You turn your head to look at Butcher some minutes into the movie and you can tell he’s deep within his thoughts. A dark place, one you know too well. So you shift your whole body, turning to him as you rest your chin on your arms which rest on the tops of your legs. “Do you remember when we first met?” You ask with a smile.
Butcher leans his head back onto the couch, turning to you with a half-tilted grin. “Like it was yesterday, sweetheart.”
“I really didn’t like you, you know.” You smile softly, looking behind him as you think. “Which is so weird because you’re just so likable.”
Butcher chuckles. “Like you’re some dainty flower yourself?” He scoffs in humor. “Right bloody nerve you must’ve had, throwing a drink in my face. That’s how I knew you had balls.”
“A compliment? Are you sure you’re feeling alright?” You bring the back of your hand to his forehead as if feeling for a fever.
“Oh piss off.” He waves you away, humor laced in his tone even if he doesn’t smile. You laugh and your hand falls to his shoulder, remaining there as you look at one another.
In an instant, all in one fluid motion, grabs you by the back of your head, pulling you into him as he angrily devours you, kissing you harshly as he grips your hair, fingers tangling into your hair as he pushes them along your scalp. His other hand moves to the small of your back as he pulls you into him, still sitting side by side as you kiss.
He bites your lower lip harshly, almost harsh enough to make you bleed, soothing it with the lapping of his tongue before moving to your top lip, moving between the two repeatedly. He’s dominating you already, pulling at you as if he needs you. You couldn’t pull away even if you wanted to. You can feel your lower stomach aching, pulsating for more as warmth bubbles in your abdomen.
He pulls away, breathing heavily as his focus moves across your face. You are beautiful, beyond beautiful, in every state he’s ever seen you. Dirty and tired, bright and happy, pissed off. “I ever tell you how knock-dead you are?”
You get what he’s saying, blushing, but you shrug it off. “You know nobody ever understands what you’re saying.”
He pulls you in closer so you’re flush against his side, holding the back of your neck as he buries his face into the side of it, kissing and nipping at you until he licks up to your ear. “You’re fucking gorgeous.”
Your face burns as you chew on your inner cheek. You don’t know what to do with yourself, especially when someone compliments you. And Butcher of all people feels so unfamiliar. You let your head fall to the other side, eyes fluttering close as he licks up your neck and nibbles your ear.
Butcher pulls back and shifts himself so he’s between your legs though not putting his weight on you as he drags his hands from your neck all the way down to the waist of your pants, pausing as he looks up to you. “May I?”
You nod, though a bit hesitant. He immediately removes his hands, backing up a bit. “Are you uncomfortable?” His tone is gentle, something you don’t see often.
“No!” You’re quick to exclaim, shaking your head. “No, no. I want to.”
Butcher smiles cockily, hooking his fingers into the waistband of your jeans. “Say it.”
You look at him with furrowed brows in confusion, which he immediately picks up on as he pushes himself back between your legs and leans forward into your lips. “I want you to tell me what you want.” He whispers.
You hesitate, breathing out slowly in embarrassment. “I want you to fuck me.”
“Of course, I will, sweetheart.” He breathes against you as he’s quick to pop the button of your jeans and strip them down your legs so you’re left in your thin cotton underwear. He backs away, looking down at your slightly parted legs, and dives his large, warm hands down between your thighs to spread them wider, craning his neck to the side as he examines you. You sink in on yourself, blushing, the cushion beneath your bare ass is scratchy and you sort of feel bad knowing this is where your friends sit.
You’re wet, leaving a damp spot right center of your underwear. He runs a thumb down over it, making you jerk slightly as he chuckles to himself. “Don’t be shy.” He looks to you as he hooks a finger into your underwear from the side, pulling it away to reveal your glistening slit.
He looks in awe as he stares at you, his lips parting slightly as he absorbs such beauty. He feels hypnotized, wanting nothing more than to fall to his knees and please you for hours until you’re screaming and raw just so he can worship you and his tongue can memorize you, every crevice and curve.
His tongue runs over his bottom lip as he dips his head down and you can’t help it, “What’re you doing?”
“How do you mean?” He looks up at you confused.
“I thought we were just gonna…” You trail off.
Butcher shakes his head slowly, looking at you as if you were crazy. “I’ve been fantasizing this a long time, love.” Truth be told, it gets him off just thinking about making you cum with nothing in return. “And all I really want is your thighs wrapped around my head until you’re hoarse.”
You almost gasp at his forwardness, though you’re not sure what you expected; it’s Butcher, after all. Even his soft side isn’t very soft. You feel a pit in your stomach, you’re sort of scared. What if it’s bad? And then you’ll have to face him, forced to live with him in this shitty basement, knowing that he doesn't particularly know his way around a pussy, despite most of his vocabulary consisting of ‘cunt’ and ‘twat’.
His finger curiously runs up your slit and you shudder, tucking your lips together as you try and quiet yourself. Butcher yanks at your legs so you’re now flat on your back, head resting on the couch as he displays his wet finger with some sort of pride, glistening in the light before pushing them past your lips and pressing down on your tongue. You suck on his finger slowly, a groan falling from his parted lips as he watches you intently.
“Fucking hell,” he murmurs, pulling the finger from your mouth and grabbing your chin so you’re forced to look up at him. He leans down to kiss you, grinding against you and you can feel the hardness of his bulge against your cotton underwear.
His finger slips down and rubs circles around your clit as he kisses your open, moaning mouth. Your eyes pinch close in agony at the slowness of it all, feeling the way he wants to draw out each and every second of pleasing you. “Look at me darling, come on.” You open your eyes to see him watching you intently. “That’s it, good girl.”
Butcher slips his fingers down your slit and teases your entrance, causing you to gasp slightly, which he reacts to by letting out a deep breath before kissing you deeply again. His touch leaves you needing more and every sense hones in on it as your back arches off of the couch as he slowly draws moans out of you.
As he pushes in and out slowly, he pushes down on your hips with his other hand, ensuring your stillness for him as he works you over and over. Your underwear begins to chafe slightly as you let out a light moan, looking down between the two of you. Lowering his head down between your propped legs, he kisses between your thighs, and his beard scratches against your skin lightly, almost drawing a small smile from you.
He hums into your thigh before dragging his other hand to scoop beneath your thigh, giving you a warm squeeze, fingers spread across your skin. As he kisses down, he begins leaving sloppy kisses that leave your skin wet, nipping you on the way, breathing heavily against you, ready to burst. His head dips down further, though slowly, teasing you as you buck your hips further.
Eventually making contact, his fingers stall as his tongue swipes up your cunt in a long stride before pulling away and savoring the way you taste on his tongue. He chuckles to himself as your hips jolt, going back down to lick up you again, his large, flat tongue trailing slowly as he runs circles on your clit. You gasp out, sitting up halfway and leaning back on your elbows as you look down at him working wonders on your pussy. His hand shoots up to rest on your stomach, pushing you back down onto your back.
His fingers pick back up again, curling up into you as he sucks on your clit, lapping circles against you as you breathe out a string of moans. Butcher grabs the bottoms of your thighs as he pushes your knee back into your face, exposing you further to him, digging nails into your flesh. As you moan again, he moans against you, causing your sensitive skin to vibrate as you dampen his beard. He devours you as you secrete onto his tongue and he finds you oh so sweet.
Your fingers push into his thick dark hair as you pull at him, wanting him closer and closer to you as he curls into your g-spot. Your back arches, one hand moving down to feel his jaw and the way it stretches to mold around you perfectly, moving up and down to lick you raw. Your moans turn into pants as your chest heaves up and down, every movement of his fingers and tongue pushing you closer and closer to the brink.
He notices this, keeping his fingerwork consistent as he pulls his mouth away, wanting nothing more than to watch you fall apart in front of him as he watches.
“That’s it,” he praises, leaning above you as your face contorts in delight, eyelids falling gently as you breathe deeply. “Just like that, gorgeous.”
His praise pushes you over the edge as the bubble in your lower stomach bursts and you’re riding the high of your orgasm, jerking your hips so you’re essentially riding out the high atop his fingers. It’s a good thing he’s as strong as he is, otherwise, you might feel self-conscious.
Butcher plants soft kisses along your collarbone as you heave out another string of moans, coming to the conclusion of your climax as your head spins in a blur. This doesn’t stop the pumping of his fingers, though, the overstimulation of it all causing you to jerk, your eyes flying open as you smack at his shoulder with a cry. “Billy!”
His fingers stall, not yet pulling out, and you almost gasp thinking you went too far, wanting to kick yourself for ruining the moment. You can’t read his face and you’re half-expecting him to curse you as he pulls out of you, leaving you alone and half-naked on the couch.
But he doesn’t. Instead, he pushes forward as he kisses you deeply, passionately, hand cradling your face as he breathes against you, noses touching as he looks down into your eyes. He pulls his fingers between you too, your sweet slick coating his fingers thickly as he inserts them into his mouth to lick them clean.
You can smell yourself on his breath and you push him back, two hands on his chest as you sit up, pushing him down into the couch. You claw at his shirt, ripping it open with such ferocity and desperation that it rips completely, buttons flying off and clanging to the ground. His chest, god how you could stare at it all day, your hands coming up to scoop and grab at his pecs as you dive down to kiss his neck. You can’t get enough of him, quickly diving your head down to kiss his chest as you lick down his torso, leaving wet kisses behind, biting at him. You bring your head back up and kiss along his pecs, close to his nipple, before you’re stopped by a hand laced in your hair, pulling you backward.
Face to face with Butcher, his hand wraps around your cheeks as he squishes your face slightly, chuckling lowly with a head shake. “That’s not how things are gonna play out sweetheart.”
In one fluid movement, he throws you onto your back, towering over you menacingly as he grabs at your throat. “I ain’t half the bitch you must be used to.”
Your pussy clenches at his alpha-male-esque as he shrugs off his ripped button-down, diving down to kiss you as you hungrily kiss back. Attempting to pull your own shirt off your head, he settles to rip your shirt as well, ripping the collar apart as you gasp a startled laugh into his mouth. “This is my favorite shirt, you know.”
“Oh I know love, and you look lovely in it.” Rip. “But you look a lot better out of it.” Riiiiiip. He pulls the loose, torn fabric from beneath you, discarding it on the floor. You sigh slightly, though humorously.
“You rip mine I rip yours.” He shrugs, dipping back and kissing you as he claws at your back with dull nails, unhooking your bra and pulling it off your arms as he goes down to kiss your chest, all the while he unbuckles his belt to give himself a bit of relief from the hardness within his jeans.
Licking down between the valley of your breasts, Butcher pinches your nipple and rolls it between his rough fingers as he nips at you. You arch your back in delight, gasping at the sensation as he takes your other breast in his warm mouth, flicking his tongue over your nipple before sucking on your breast, now rubbing his hand up and down your bare torso.
Your fingers knit in his hair as you throw your head back in a moan. “Fuck, Butcher.” You’re sure not to push your luck by calling him Billy again, which he’s always hated from us for some reason.
Your body breaks out in chills as his fingers lightly graze your skin, clearly more focused on pleasing you than himself. After giving your nipple a nip, which causes you to jump, you push at him and he hovers over you, lips parted as he adjusts himself in his pants. “Tell me you want it.” He groans.
“I want it. You.” His head tilts to the side. Not good enough.
“I want you to fuck me.” You groan in need to which he nods, unbuttoning his pants as he dives his hand down into the front of his jeans.
Pulling himself out, fuck he’s huge, you feel intimidated as he aligns himself with your entrance, running his large tip along your slit which causes you to shiver. Fuck. Your legs are already shaking.
Butcher places a hand on your lower stomach, rubbing slowly. “Relax.” He purrs, tugging at his cock so precut beads over the top. “You’re okay.”
You nod as you take a deep breath, exhaling slowly as he pushes his tip within your entrance, the sudden fullness causing you to gasp as he stretches you out to fit himself snuggly within you. You whine aloud at the sting, shaking your head. “I don’t think it’s gonna—“
“We’ll make it fit.” He whispers a coo, pushing himself in slowly with a slow sway of the hips, moving back and forth in rhythm with what length he’s already accomplished.
You nod, eyes crinkling shut as you push past the burning sensation. It’s odd—it hurts, yet feels so good. Your pussy throbs, a deep ache you never knew had become prevalent, a hunger deep within you igniting as you wish you could swallow him whole. He continues to thrust deeper, laying forward as his chest meets yours, kissing you passionately as he rocks into you, inch by inch stretching your cunt so you’re personally molded for him. He groans into your ear which breaks your skin out into chills, cursing under his breath as he buries his face into your neck, two hands gripping your ass to spread you apart for him and his liking.
His cock hits the sweet spot as he rocks fully into you in a primal need, picking up his pace as he pushes himself above and hikes up your leg against his side, arm scooping beneath to hold it there as he slows himself to a painful pace, cocking his head to look down at your glistening face, sweat beading down between the valley of your breasts as you moan out into the air.
“You were made for me.” He huffs out, throwing his head back with a groan as you tighten around him from his praise. You can feel yourself climbing that same high from earlier, chasing it more ferociously now, his cock ramming into you until the walls of your pussy are raw from the friction. Your other leg shoots up so they’re not hooked around his waist, pulling him into you so you can kiss him because god is he sweet.
You kiss into his open, moaning mouth as you slink your fingers up his rough backside and rip your nails into the flesh, ripping down his back as he slams into you harshly, cursing under his breath. You can feel yourself tightening around his cock, building more and more pressure for the two of you as his hand wands to press down on your lower stomach and the other grips beneath your head, fingers pushing through your hair before bunching it in his fist to tug at as some sort of anchor for himself.
“You’re a fucking succubus, you know that?” He whispers harshly, trying to contain himself as he presses down into your lower stomach, causing your pleasure to tenfold as you moan out, trying to ground yourself as you stab your nails into his back to try and not lose yourself completely.
“Cum for me sweetheart.” He urges, wanting nothing more than to serve you before himself. “I know you’re close.”
You nod, mouth falling slack as you moan out his name, tightening your grip within your legs around his side, feeling his motion and rhythm as if it was your own. You suck in a sharp breath, finally pushed over the edge as he fucks you through your high, filling you with a sort of comfort, playing a game of ping pong with your orgasm; you push onto him, and he only pushes you back. It’s wild and wide, your legs shaking around him as he holds you and fucks you into ecstasy. All you can do is gasp, unable to even speak, feeling as if you are within the heavens themselves. Who knew you could feel so good, especially at the hands of someone so bad?
You feel Butcher’s cock twitching within you as he breeds you, groaning loudly, louder than before, though you can hardly hear him over the ringing in your own ears. He curses a “fuck” and “shit” as he spills himself into you, heaving like a wild animal as he pushes into your with broken thrusts, his cum serving as some sort of slick cushioning from the burn of friction. You can feel his cum spill out of you slightly as he pulls all the way out and pushes back in, both of you breathing heavily as you orgasm together. An unstopping force meets an unmoving object as you two mold into one beautifully, always meant to pass but never meant to stick.
Butcher pulls completely out of you, collapsing onto you as you both breathe as if you had just run a marathon.
You might’ve well have.
“Fucking hell,” Butcher says between breaths to which you nod, heart pounding within your chest as you stare up towards the ceiling, sweat clinging to your naked body feeling tacky and cool as you two gather yourself. Once ready, Butcher lifts himself off of you and pulls his pants up, laying back onto his back as he pulls you into him, resting your cheek on his chest as he rubs your shoulder, body resting between his spread ones.
He kisses your temple, nuzzling his cheek into the top of your head as he runs his hand up and down your arm gently, comforting silence overtaking you two for a moment as you two reflect on what just happened. You crane your neck up so you can look at him.
“You really remember the first time you met me, all those years ago?”
Butcher nods, looking at you and then off into the distance. “Of course I do.”
You adjust your head back so your cheek is to his chest, nodding. “You’re not as heartless as I thought.”
Butcher is silent for a moment, reflecting on your statement. His instinct is to run away from the statement, to retreat and prove you wrong. But this one time, he allows himself to be vulnerable. And while he doesn’t know what to exactly say (he’s never been the best with words), the action of holding you tighter and leaving a long kiss on your temple tells you enough.
“Me neither.”
part two here
84 notes · View notes
utdmoon · 1 year
Text
drunken confessions | jude bellingham
jude bellingham x footballer!reader
summary: in which jude and his teammate can’t stand each other… until one night changes everything
word count: 3.7k
note: first time writing in second person and i’m not a big fan of how it turned out lol please let me know your thoughts x
request here
To be able to represent the country you'd grown up in was a dream come true, something you still couldn't fathom even after travelling halfway across the globe to play in the World Cup. It was difficult of course, being one of the youngest players in the squad, but your teammates were always there to support you, giving you advice as well as helping you deal with the new changes. However, there was just one person that you could never seem to get on with, despite how hard you tried.
"I just don't understand what I've done wrong," you ranted to your best friend over the phone, who was currently staying in her hotel ready to watch you play over the next few weeks. "I get on well with every single person except him, it's like he has an agenda against me!"
You were telling her about all of your troubles with Jude, who didn't seem to like you at all. The first day the team was all together, he'd given you the cold shoulder, only talking to you when necessary. However, after that, it had developed into constant bickering, to the point where you were often separated by other members of the squad. You knew it was only a short while until Gareth would notice and have to step in, and it frustrated you, because you were never the one to initiate the conflict. It was strange because your chemistry on the pitch was phenomenal: the two of you were like a house on fire, but as soon as you were taken out of that setting, all hell broke loose.
"What did he say today?" your friend laughed over the phone, knowing this was a daily occurrence. She seemed to think that he was doing it because he liked you, which to you was absolutely absurd. You weren't in primary school anymore, if he liked you, he would have made it clear.
"So I'm just chilling in the lounge room reading my book and he complained that I was 'turning my pages too loudly', like what the hell?" you complained dramatically, your voice raising a pitch. "And then Jordan just told him to move if it bothered him and he refused because 'he sat there first', he's such a child!"
"He's older than you, Y/N," your friend chuckled, causing you to roll your eyes.
"By what? A month? I don't understand because he's so mature otherwise, he's just like that with me. It's like, he complains about me, and then is constantly in my presence, surely if you don't like someone you'd want to stay away from them?"
"Y/N, I swear I've never met anyone as oblivious as you – it's obvious he likes you!"
"Don't be silly, I've never heard something so untrue in my life."
Later on, you were sitting with the rest of the boys in your hotel, scrolling through your phone in boredom. Training had been completed during the day, and so now you had some free time to wind down. However, your teammates had no intention of relaxing, instead planning on going out, which you knew would result in them getting drunk.
"You coming too Y/N?" Trent asked you, taking your attention away from the game you were playing.
"Probably not, we have a game tomorrow," you shrugged, knowing you didn't want to be dealing with a hangover. You weren't exactly the best at handling your alcohol and you knew you would be suffering the consequences in the morning.
"It's tomorrow night, you have like a whole 24 hours to recover," Jack tried to convince you, but to no avail. You looked up to see Jude's eyes on you, his piecing gaze causing you to look away almost immediately. His expression was unreadable, almost as if he wanted you to go too, probably because he wanted to see you embarrass yourself whilst drunk.
"Nah, I think I'll stay, you lot have fun though!" you decided, knowing a night out was definitely not what you needed. Your perfect evening sounded like a warm blanket and Netflix, alone time something you'd seriously been craving.
"I knew she'd be too boring to go," Jude commented, causing you to roll your eyes. He always had to make a snarky comment every time you spoke, and it was seriously starting to irritate you.
You wanted to bite back but you knew that was exactly what he wanted, so you held your tongue. Instead, you sent a sweet smile his way. "Have a good time Jude," you said, causing his brows to furrow just the slightest amount, enough to let you know that wasn't the reaction he had anticipated. You left the room after that, giving the boys your farewell and deciding to head back to your hotel room.
A couple of hours later, you had just completed your bedtime routine, your skincare done and your teeth brushed when you were disturbed by sudden loud noises outside. You groaned, realising that the boys were probably back from their outing with no intention to quiet down any time soon.
You drowned yourself in your duvet, hoping that it would drown the sound of them too, but to no avail. Eventually, you got up, swinging your door open and heading towards the noise, an irritated expression on your face.
"Seriously? Can you not keep quiet, I'm trying to sleep," you whined, rubbing your eyes. Your face twisted into confusion when you realised it was only Jude, Jack and the security guard stood outside. "Wait... why is there so much noise when it's only you three here?"
"Y/N!" Jude giggled, rushing towards you. You stepped back in alarm, suddenly very awake.
"Everyone else has gone to sleep but Jude's obsessed with you," Jack claimed, laughing at the younger man's actions.
"How drunk are they?" you questioned the security guard, who looked just as concerned as you.
"Jack's not as bad, I can get him into his room but Jude... he's been non stop asking for you the whole way home."
"Me?" you asked in disbelief of his words. "Are you sure?"
"Positive," he replied, glancing at Jude who was now latched onto your arm. "Do you think you could take him to his room whilst I take Jack? I'm sorry for disturbing your night but it'll take forever with both of them together."
"Oh no, of course! Don't worry about it," you reassured him as he sent you a grateful smile before turning away with Jack. This wasn't exactly how you envisioned your night to go, but you felt back for the security guard and so agreed, meaning you now has to deal with a very drunk Jude.
"What the fuck is wrong with you?" you questioned him as soon as the others were out of earshot. He was practically hugging your side, his eyes glazed over and a broad smile on his face.
"You look so pretty with your hair like that," he completely ignored your words, referring to the messy bun latched on your head. You widened your eyes, stepping away from him. Pretty? He'd never complimented you before, and you hated the way it sent tingles through your spine.
"You're drunk, Jude," you reminded him, but also yourself. "Go to sleep," you grumbled, beginning to get annoyed with his behaviour.
He began to giggle, louder and louder to the point that you had to slap your palm over his mouth, desperately trying not to disturb everyone else in their rooms.
"Can you shut up?" you scolded him, causing him to quieten but not completely stop. "What's your room number?"
"I don't know," he shrugged, a teasing smile on his face.
"Jude, I don't have time for your games, please, what number is it?"
"I don't remember!" he spoke exasperatedly.
"Show me your room key," you sighed, only for him to shrug again. "You don't have it?" you asked, and he nodded. You threw your head back towards the ceiling, tears growing in your eyes out of frustration.
You dragged him into your own room, well aware that it was against the rules but you had no other choice. If you were to go and ask for a new key now Gareth would certainly find out, and although you and Jude didn't get on, you didn't want to purposely get him into trouble.
You threw a pillow and extra blanket on the floor as he simply stood behind you, watching your actions. "You can sleep on the floor."
"What? Nooooo, Y/N don't be like that," he whined, once again latching onto your arm. You turned to face him, your faces closer than you expected, causing you to suck in a harsh breath.
"It's either that, or you can sleep outside. I shouldn't even be having to deal with this, I wanted a relaxing night."
Your heart skipped a beat when he wrapped his arms around you, burying his head in the crook of your neck. "Let me at least sleep in the bed, please," he mumbled, his hot breaths against your skin sending a shiver down your spine.
"Okay... but you have to keep your distance," you eventually gave in, his close proximity making you nervous.
"I've tried, and it's impossible," he winked after pulling away, and you furrowed your eyebrows in confusion.
"You need to stop speaking in riddles," you moaned, picking the pillow back up and placing it back on the bed. "Go to sleep," you added, climbing to the very edge to ensure he wouldn't be anywhere near you whilst you slept.
"Not before you give me a goodnight kiss," he giggled, joining you on the bed.
You turned around abruptly, meeting the expectant expression on his face. A goodnight kiss, had he gone insane? "I don't know how much you drank today Jude but please learn how to handle your liquor next time."
"Come on Y/N, you know you want to," he wriggled his eyebrows in an attempt to be funny. You hated the fact that he was right, you would be lying if you said you didn't find him attractive.
"You wouldn't be saying this if you were sober," you commented, eyes travelling over his face.
"Yes I would," he replied. "Please, just one kiss?"
"No Jude, go to sleep," you refused, turning your head to the side again. You were just about to fall asleep when you felt his arms wrapping around you, pulling your back into his chest. "I told you to keep your distance!" you exclaimed, grabbing your pillow and whacking it over his face.
"Owww," he whined, rubbing his nose. "Why are you so aggressive?"
"Why are you so annoying?" you muttered.
"Me? Annoying? You're annoying!" he argued back childishly, making you groan.
"You're the one who has a problem with me! No matter what I do you complain about me, what have I even done to you?" you questioned, voice quietening at the end. You didn't even know why you were questioning him whilst he was drunk, it's not like he could give a coherent answer.
His eyes softened at your words, guilt flooding his features. "Y/N, I'm sorry."
"You can do this in the morning – that's if you haven't changed your mind by then – but right now Jude, I just want to sleep," you concluded, knowing that his apology would only be genuine if given whilst sober.
You thought he was finally going to listen, until his voice suddenly sounded again. "So no goodnight kiss?"
He glanced at you hopefully, the slightest pout forming over his lips. He looked adorable and you couldn't help it, so you placed a gentle kiss on his cheek before instantly turning back around as your face flushed. You couldn't believe that you just did that, regret flooding your body. Would he remember that in the morning?
"See, that wasn't that hard," he chuckled, finally lying down on his side of the bed before you both fell asleep.
The morning sunlight fell on your face and you basked in the warmth, a content smile on your face. However, that wasn't the only source of heat around you: heavy arms were wrapped around your middle, locking you into place. You relaxed into the feeling, your eyes falling shut again until you realised where you were.
At the world cup. On match day. In your room, that only belonged to you.
"Jude, get your arms off me!" you suddenly exclaimed, wriggling out of his grip at an alarmingly fast pace.
"It's too early," he groaned, rubbing his face. His voice was raspy with sleep, and you hated the way it caused butterflies in your stomach. "Wait... Y/N?" he questioned once he'd opened his eyes, instant panic setting into his face.
"Yes, Y/N. You've overstayed your welcome, get out of my bed Jude," you shoved him aside before getting up.
"My god... how much did I drink last night?" he sighed, climbing out from the other side. You ignored him, walking up to the vanity to brush your hair that had become awfully messy overnight.
"Are you going to say anything?" he asked, watching you from the side.
"Why should I say anything? You're the one who was being loud outside my room at god knows what hour and then wouldn't leave me alone so had to sleep here – you're really irritating when you're drunk you know," you ranted, annoyed that he was in no way apologetic.
It was as if your words had caused all of the memories of last night to suddenly replay in his mind, for his face suddenly flushed in embarrassment. His eyes dropped to your lips, probably remembering how much he'd begged you to kiss him and he winced, avoiding eye contact. You simply raised an eyebrow, waiting for him to speak.
"I'm leaving," he simply said, causing you to frown. That was it? Not even a simple 'thank you for looking after me'?
"Good. And Jude," you spoke, causing his head to turn as he approached the door. "Don't pull that shit again, I can't deal with your drunkenness."
He didn't reply, letting out a small scoff which made you want to cry in frustration once he'd left: why was he so difficult?
You made your way downstairs, pulling the strings of your hoodie so your face was practically concealed, still exhausted from the nights events.
"Woah Y/N, you look more hungover than everyone else and you didn't even drink," Bukayo commented, everyone else chuckling in agreement.
"Let's just say I had a long night," you replied, glaring at Jude who avoided eye contact. Everyone around you seemed to notice the tension, sending each other curious looks. "I need some coffee," you stood up, walking to get yourself a hot drink.
On your way back, you overheard Jude speaking to Trent. You knew you shouldn't have eavesdropped, but you couldn't help it, especially when the topic of conversation was you.
"I fucked up so bad man, I was there begging her to kiss me, do you know how embarrassing that is?" he groaned, his strong Brummie accent coming through.
Trent chuckled in response. "Well maybe it's a sign for you to stop being so mean to her, you clearly like her."
"That's the problem! I wish I didn't, this is all so complicated," he dropped his head onto the table in frustration. "I don't even mean to be such a dick, it's just that it's easier than having to deal with my feelings."
Your heart stopped at his words: so his feelings for you were genuine? You had been denying it to yourself this entire time, but anyone could tell that you felt the same way. Your teammates always joked that there was 'sexual tension' between you and you were always quick to shut it down, but perhaps they had been right.
Nevertheless, you were still annoyed by Jude's words, rolling your eyes as you walked past. If he liked you, he could've just said that instead of treating you horribly.
You spent the rest of the day well away from him, trying to clear the thought of him from your mind and instead prepare you for the match to come. It was the last one of the group stages and you were playing Wales, and so you needed to win. You hadn't played that much so far, usually only coming on as a substitute so you were ecstatic when told you were in the starting lineup.
The sound of the fans cheering you on as you walked out of the tunnel made your heart beat rapidly: it was moments like this that felt so surreal. The support was what pushed you to play your best, knowing there was thousands of people behind you, not only here in the stadium but back home too.
Unfortunately, the first half ended up goalless, but that only meant you were even more determined as you came back out for the second. So far, your performance had been good and knew that a goal was soon to come from your team.
Only five minutes in, your team has a brilliant attack, with Luke Shaw running rapidly up the left. He passed to Jude, who dribbled through the opponents before quickly assessing his options, realising you were the only one. The ball was crossed to you, gliding your way beautifully, making it easy for you to shoot into the back of the net, the whole stadium erupting into cheers.
You lifted your hands up to form a love heart which you sent towards the fans before your teammates came running at you. Jude was the first to hug you and you reciprocated the movement, temporarily forgetting about all of your troubles.
"Thank you for the assist!" you giggled, high on emotion. You couldn't care less about how he'd treated you earlier, or whatever conflict there was between the two, your goal being the only thing on your mind.
"Your first international goal, I'm so proud of you Y/N!" he squeezed you tighter, and the butterflies in your stomach made a reappearance.
After that, your team managed to score 3 more goals, one from Phil and a brace from Marcus. You were all elated as you entered the changing rooms, having secured your place at the top of the table and into the round of sixteen. However, by the time you had all returned to your hotel, you were exhausted, for it was almost 1AM.
You hadn't spoken to Jude since your goal, and you knew he wouldn't be the one to initiate a conversation, so you took it upon yourself.
"Jude, can I speak to you?" you asked him in the hotel lobby, and suddenly everyone else was interested. He glanced at you with tired eyes, much like you, but if this conversation didn't happen now, you knew it never would.
"Sure," he agreed, and there was a hint of embarrassment on his face, for he knew what you were going to discuss. The two of you walked towards your room, where you had some privacy.
"Thank you for the assist again," you said awkwardly, balancing on the balls of your feet.
He quirked up an eyebrow, "You don't need to thank me, you scored, but Y/N, I know that's not what you're here to talk about."
"Right," you nodded, throat feeling a little constricted. "Do you remember what happened last night?" you asked him, just to ensure you were on the same page. His cheeks flushed pink and his gaze dropped to the floor, confirming your beliefs.
"Do you have anything to say about it?" you laughed at his silence, not mockingly, but encouraging him to speak.
He grabbed your hand, pulling you down to sit down on the bed, but not letting go once you'd done so. "Y/N, I'm sorry," he said, your eyes widening slightly in surprise.
"Not just for disturbing your night, but for everything. I've been horrible to you ever since you came here and you didn't deserve that at all. You're an amazing player and it must have been so difficult for you anyways, being new to the team and everything, and I probably made it worse." His face was littered with guilt, his hands squeezing yours slightly without even realising.
"Jude, it's okay," you reassured him, noticing the sincerity in his voice. Honestly speaking, you didn't think it was that deep; it was mostly childish bickering, it wasn't as if he'd actually hurt your feelings. "Well actually, you were quite a bit of a dick, but it's okay,” you chuckled, causing him to laugh with you.
His eyes travelled to yours, scanning your face to make sure your words were genuine. "I was more than just a dick Y/N," he shook his head. "But I did it because..." he trailed off, as if he was assessing what to say next.
"You did it because...?" you repeated, already knowing his reasoning due to his conversation with Trent.
"I like you Y/N,” he admitted, his eyes glassy with vulnerability. “I like you and it's so frustrating because I don't know what to do about it, I've never felt this way about anyone before, especially not a teammate! All I've been thinking about last night is how you kissed me on the cheek, and I'm so embarrassed about how I acted but I can't help it," he ranted, before immediate regret flooded his features.
Before he could say anything to take back his words, you leaned in and placed your lips against his, and after the initial shock, he kissed you back, a kiss of passion and want and need. You were both breathless as you pulled away, silly smiles on both of your faces.
"There, that's another thing for you to be thinking about," you winked, pinching the heat on his cheek, despite yours feeling equally as hot.
781 notes · View notes
jadedvibes · 1 year
Text
Always (II)
Summary: Bucky helps you pack for your move and makes a small request before you leave.
Pairing: best friend!Bucky x reader
Warnings: lots of feels and yearning, more angst, swearing, pet names.
Word Count: 1.7k
Series masterlist
Like, comment, and/or reblog to put a giant smile on my face ♡
Tumblr media
You and your friends met up for one last brunch at Wanda’s insistence. You knew it’d be tough, but you were glad you did because it would be a while before your next reunion. The majority of your apartment was packed away, so you took a good part of the day celebrating your graduation with the people that got you through the journey. Fortunately, the gang was staying back in the area, so it was only a matter of time before you could see them all again. 
Bucky stayed close by the entire day, and you felt his eyes on you whenever you separated. Everyone could tell that he was a little off, but they also knew why, so they made no mention of it. He was missing you before you even left.
He insisted on helping you pack what little you had left after you said your goodbyes to your friends. And since you could never tell him no, you accepted the help. 
With your arm linked with his you grabbed a pizza from your favorite spot before going back to your place – at least for a few more hours. 
The two of you danced around each other during the moving process, both wanting to say more, do something, anything. But neither of you did. 
He kept watching you, and you stole glances whenever you thought you could get away with it; you were going to miss having him around. But it got to a point where his staring wasn’t subtle any longer, so you turned your full attention onto him. “B, you look like you want to say something.” 
You wanted him to say what he was thinking in the hope that it was similar to what laid heavily in your heart – because you didn’t have the courage to say it yourself. 
Bucky’s eyes widened, and he turned his head toward a stack of boxes lining the wall. “I dunno what you mean.”
“You’ve been eyeing me all day, is there something on my face or what is it?” 
His brows furrowed and a smirk crossed his face. He didn’t realize he’d been that obvious. Although, it might have been a good thing – perhaps the time for subtlety had passed. Stepping in front of you, he stared down at you again. 
“Definitely something on your face, honey,” he lied, lifting his thumb and dusting it over your bottom lip.
He didn’t know what he was doing, but he couldn’t stop himself. 
Gazing up at him, you were moments from throwing caution to the wind and going for it as his gorgeous eyes held yours for a few seconds longer than it should have. You swallowed nervously before unconsciously biting your lip. 
Bucky’s breath hitched in his throat and he slowly stepped back as he shook his head to try to push away his thoughts; he couldn’t go there, even though he wanted to bite your lip too. If you kept looking at him like that he was going to do something he’d regret, and he wasn’t selfish enough to complicate your life like that – no matter how much he wanted to. 
The wheels were already set in motion. You had a plan, and you had to follow through with it. Whatever love or feelings he thought he had would fade away as you both worked on building your careers. 
You shrugged off that slightly awkward encounter, realizing it was better this way. The two of you finished packing the last of your boxes into the moving truck, finally clearing out the entirety of your apartment. Four years worth of furniture and life, reduced to boxes in a small van. The entire packing process would have overwhelmed you were it not for Bucky’s intervention; he helped make it easy, and now the long distance movers would do their part by delivering it all to your place across the country. 
Your cab was on its way because you had a late flight to catch, and despite Bucky’s preference, he would have to say his goodbyes now. 
He wanted to drop you off at the airport, but you knew that his first day of work was the following day, and you would not be the one to mess with that. 
He was going to do great, stepping into his father’s position at the architecture firm. It’s what his dad had been training him to do for years, and it’s why Bucky double-majored in business and architectural engineering. You wanted him at his best, and that’s why you insisted on this being your final farewell, for now of course. 
“Thanks for all your help, B. I would not have been able to do all of that without you,” you smiled at your best friend. 
“I know you would’ve managed just fine, but you’re welcome,” he gave you a soft grin, rocking back and forth on his heels with his hands in his pockets. 
“So I guess this is it,” you mumbled. How do you say goodbye to your closest friend that got you through one of the most hectic times in your life? Sure, you knew you’d see him again someday, but life was busy and work schedules would conflict; the distance certainly wouldn’t make it easy. Then there was the issue of your heart belonging to him, that was a bit complicated too. 
“I guess this is,” his blue eyes held yours. 
“We should make plans, for maybe New Years’ or something,” you suggested. 
Bucky thought about how that was six months away – half a year he’d have to go without you. He wasn’t sure how he’d manage that. 
“I’d like that,” he gave you a small smile before looking down at the ground. 
This wasn’t supposed to be so hard, and it wasn’t supposed to make your heart ache, so why the hell did it? Your chest tightened at the sight of your best friend torn up over your decision to go – but this was what you had to do. 
“Bucky,” you whispered. You stepped forward and slid your hands over his shoulders, linking your fingers behind his neck. He wrapped his arms around your waist tightly, clutching your body, anchoring you to him. 
Goodbyes were a bitch, but distance would make it easier, he reminded himself. Time apart would do you both some good, he assured himself. 
But it was all a lie – he knew that too. 
You saw the yellow cab turning onto your long street, and you exhaled a heavy breath. Tears welled in your eyes, and you caught Bucky blinking back some of his own. While staying close, you really looked at him, taking in his handsome features; those pouty lips that teased you, those cerulean eyes that watched out for you the last few years, and those adorable cheeks that blushed at the first sight of embarrassment. You’d miss it all.  
Your heart knew why this was so hard, but you knew it was too late to do anything about it. 
You had to leave behind the man you loved. 
Bucky saw the cab slowly cruising over and he gave you a tight smile, brushing his thumb over your cheekbone. “I think we should forget about what’s to come and you should let me kiss you goodbye.” Though his voice was leveled, his eyes pleaded with yours. 
Despite your better judgment, you nodded your head and waited with bated breath. 
He grabbed your face with both hands, gently, as if you were the most precious thing in the world, and leaned in. His soft warm lips touched yours, and you knew then that you were making a terrible terrible mistake. His eyes fluttered shut and his arms suddenly curled around your waist, pulling you even closer so that your body was pressed up against his. You took his face in your hands and kissed him with everything you had, feeling his heart pound along with your own. 
You tasted sweeter than your nickname, and you felt better than any pair of lips had ever felt to him before. His tongue slid between your parted lips, and Bucky knew he’d regret this then. 
Urgency, warmth, and need flooded your senses as his tongue danced along yours. 
Your body fit perfectly against his, better than anyone else’s ever did, or ever would. He kissed you until you were breathless, and then a little more for good measure, only breaking apart when the cab driver finally pulled up and honked his horn. 
“Damn,” he muttered under his breath, pressing his forehead to yours. 
“I’ve gotta go, B,” you whispered, wishing you could stay. 
“I know, honey,” he kissed your forehead, before pecking your lips one last time. 
Grabbing your carryon, he placed it into the cab’s trunk. 
After shutting it, he stepped before you. There was nothing left to do. Holding your breath, you looked at him one last time for a long while. There was so much you could see in those blue eyes; dejection warring with desperation to touch you again. At least that’s what you thought you saw, because that’s what you were battling too. 
The air felt charged, and he still had so much he wanted to say, but he knew he couldn’t stop you from taking the job you’d worked so hard to get. 
“Safe travels. Text me when you land,” he finally said.
You nodded your head, reminded that you had a plane to catch. “Best of luck tomorrow. I know you’re ready and you’re going to do amazing.” 
Bucky nodded with a polite smile and opened the car door, letting you slide in. He held his breath as he watched you for the final time. Once you were in, he carefully shut the door. 
“I love you, honey,” he said to you through the open window. 
“I’ll always love you, B.”
Bucky watched as the yellow cab took off with the love of his life. He chastised himself for waiting so damn long to realize what was always in front of him. 
He shouldn’t have kissed you, because now he knew exactly what he’d lost. Although, he wasn’t sure if he could live with the alternative – always wondering what your sweet lips would feel like against his. 
How he would survive waiting six long months to see you again, he didn’t know. Just like how he had no idea how to move forward with his life without you by his side. 
Part III
403 notes · View notes
sannieluvrr · 1 month
Text
Eternal Sunshine ~ ch.1 - Moving Out
Tumblr media
dividers used, created by @cafekitsune
warnings: The moving out part moves quickly. I didn't want to linger on family life for the reader since everyone is different, but I do take creative liberty because the reader has anxiety. I apologize for that, but not really lolz! Mingi’s anxiety/depression is mentioned, but I try not to make it seem like I know what he goes through.
word count: 3k (ish)
please check my account. Nameless/photoless/ageless blogs will be blocked. check here
!! MDNI !!
Tumblr media
Your decision to return to school had been abrupt and shocking to everyone you told. Many people saw how you became a homebody after your first year away. No one knew what had happened, just that you needed to be home.
This year, though, you promised everything would be different. You would take charge of your life and find who you were again. For your most significant change, you decided to go to a school across the country that is far enough driving distance to prevent more home visits this year.
While you truly love your home life, it was time for a change. You never left your room, turned the lights on, opened your blinds, or didn’t go out of your way to eat. You were living an unhealthy lifestyle.
By the time your family helped you decide therapy would be a good idea, you had already been looking up therapists. It took a week to find the right fit and then a month to visit. They requested in-person visits, but you still need to be worked up to that.
After months of therapy and advice on ways to help bring joy back into your life. It started with upbeat music, then happier movies - which, more often than not, were cartoons, then you started walking in the morning with your father before work—one in the evenings with your mother.
You started cooking with your mom at meals. You have reintroduced yourself back into an everyday home life. That was when your therapist suggested living in a dorm. They never said to go across the country; that was all you. But you knew being in the same state as your family would enable your actions from before again. You didn’t want that to happen. That’s when things got serious at home.
Your life sped up. You retook all sorts of college entrance exams. You chose somewhere sunny for school to enhance your new ‘live in sunshine’ life. You had been ecstatic when you got your test scores back with high marks and few errors.
Now, here you are, on the beautiful sunny campus, not even five blocks from a beach. Looking up at the gorgeous light stone buildings for housing, behind a neighborhood of houses, and near the campus. You see many buildings all surrounding a central point and more housing buildings behind that.
You enter your building and are hit with the sense of chaos. People are moving everywhere. They’re entering in and leaving dorms from across the hall. Some walk down hallways to their rooms, and others carry their belongings up the stairs and into elevators.
All this is happening on multiple floors, but you are shocked at the sight of the common area before you. Couches line the walls, and there are computer stations; there is a TV where more couches lay around. Another area has multiple tables for various purposes, along with an area for snacks for you to grab and go.
You will love this place, making sure to remember the grab-and-go station. You look down at your welcome envelope and see “502,” you look around for an indication of where that could be when you smack into a wall. Except the wall chuckles.
“Are you okay there?” a deep but delicate voice says. It startled you, and you looked into their chest, tilting your head.
“You're very tall,” you say out loud, surprising yourself and the wall. “I’m sorry. I don’t know why I said that out loud. I'm okay, thank you. I'm sorry I wasn’t paying attention.”
“Not your fault. I was paying more attention to this,” Yunho says, waving a book. “Do you need some help?”
“Oh yes, where would I find room 502? I didn't know where I should go for that room number.”
“Ah, you're on the top floor. Luckily, there are fewer rooms up there. I think only five? Fascinating. Would you like me to show you? I was heading up there myself.”
“If you don't mind? How hard do you imagine stealing the elevator would be currently? I have a couple more bags, and I am not walking up those stairs five times.” you mention.
He looks down at you curiously, his grey-blonde hair falling into his eyes. He smiles and says,
“Well, if you want help, my roommate and I can help you. However, he might still be asleep. He was up late working on some stuff.”
“Only if he wants. I would never want to disturb someone’s rest,” you state, somewhat going back into your shell. The thought of meeting another person intimidates you. If he notices, he doesn’t comment on it.
“How about this? I grab some more bags with you. Then, we can go up together. Hopefully, the elevator will be available; if not, we will take breaks at each floor if necessary!” he states, his smile brightening his entire face and reminding you of his stunning beauty.
“I don't want to pressure you into helping me,” you say, quickly losing yourself to your insecurities.
“Well, Tiny, I offered, so it is no trouble,” he says, reaching out and grabbing the duffle bag you have off your shoulder and moving it to his. “Come on, lead the way.” throwing out one arm in a ‘lead the direction’ gesture.
“I, but you, ugh, okay.” you show him to your car, still in shock from the nickname. You never considered yourself tiny, but you guess to someone the height of a skyscraper, anyone can be little.
He follows along behind you, smiling. He had seen you turning and staring in shock with a hint of terror at the sight of the common room. He thinks you must be new and a freshman. He doesn’t want to be that guy who goes after freshman, but he remembers how stressful his first day was, let alone doing it in a coed dorm.
But before he could speak to you and announce his presence. You had spun around and walked right into him. Looking at you, he’d never seen anyone like you. You had this beauty of real-world experience but childlike innocence hidden beneath your eyes.
He noted the hint of fear that crossed your features after he spoke, seeing you look at him like he was an entirely different species. He didn’t know you, and you could have been sheltered as a teen, so you got scared. He was never one to judge. His best friend was that sheltered kid. Everyone assumed the opposite with how he acted, however.
As you neared your car, you slowed, opening the trunk to show him what you had. To be fair, you didn’t bring much. But you got your happiness. The boxes in your backseat held the keys to keeping you from spiraling again. You would die before letting someone carry those.
“A few bags. There's only three more in here, Tiny. What else do you have?”
“Um, there's a box or two in the backseat, but I will get those,” you state. Pulling your hands into each other and anxiously twisting them around.
“Ah, okay. Let’s grab these then.” He says. He looks up in time to see his roommate emerge. He was handsome, wearing an outfit of comfort, hoodie and sweatpants. Hood pulled over his head, practically making it hard to see his face.
“Mingi! Come grab this,” he shouts. You jolt at the sudden tone of his voice. He notes your reaction but doesn’t comment. He has seen these actions before. You’ll be able to confide and trust in him and Mingi in no time.
“Yunho, why did you wake me at such an untimely hour?” he says, his voice deep and rough. Your eyes go wide in shock at the sound. It sends a note of something down your spine. Not unpleasant but unexpected.
“We’re helping our new neighbor out. Come on,” Yunho says, you love their names. He opens the back door and grabs the first box, handing it and a duffle bag to mingi.
“But I thought our floor was full.” mingi says in confusion, looking behind Yunho to you. You stand there in shock, taking deep breaths. Trying to calm your racing heart because there is now another giant in your midst. “oh, hello, aren't you adorable!” he says with a bright smile.
You burst into flames right then and there. Sure, your cheeks are darker than tomatoes, and your hands are moving at a speed rivaling lightning McQueen. You giggle at your comparison, knowing others would say something more relatable for your age.
Yunho looks at you and smiles as he grabs the first box and another duffle bag. “Hey, Tiny, you can carry two duffles, or do you want Mingi to make one?”
“um- i uh don't care. I can do it.”
“Tiny?” Mingi says, looking between you and Yunho.
“Yeah, isn’t it cute? I don't need a name for them, and they get tiny. since they are so adorable.” Yunho says, smiling. It is then that you realize they are carrying your precious boxes.
“AH, no, no, I’ll- I’ll take the boxes, a-and you guys can take the duffle bags. I- those are important to me,” you say anxiously, moving to take it before Yunho lifts it high.
“No can do, Princess, we are your servants now. But we are the ones leading the charge. Maybe we should be your knights instead.” mingi states. Smiling brightly, he grabs one of the duffle bags from the trunk. “There, you take that last one. We don’t want to exhaust you, Princess.”
“But- I need to. I- those are more important than anything to me,” you say, your chin tilting down and your eyes turning anxious with severe intent of protecting them.
“and we will protect them with our lives,” Yunho says, holding it with more care than he had carried anything else before.
“O- o-o ay. Let's go.” you stutter out. You take a deep breath and lock your car.
~~~~~
You follow behind the boys as they claim the next elevator ride. You get in and notice the care they give your boxes, not once messing with them. You slowly look mingi over, his ten shoes gray like his sweats. You speed your eyes up to his torso and not how toned his body is, even in a baggy sweatshirt. one that you are sure would dwarf you if you tried it on.
You give your head a little shake. Why would you be wearing his hood, y/n? Don’t be ridiculous. You meet his eyes, and he has a subtle smirk that contradicts the soft, caring look in his eyes. You blush and look at your shoes again.
You hear the elevator beep and move to get out when Yunho stops you. “us first, milady,” he says goofily. You giggle and wait as they carefully get everything out before keeping the elevator door open for you. Your duffles are on the floor, but the boxes are still safely in their hands. Not once have they been removed from them.
You smile to yourself as you follow them out of the elevator. Looking up, you see a common room with a kitchen and hang-out area to the right, and on the left are five doors, one at the end of the hall and two on each side leading down to it.
As you pass each one, you note the different decorations and designs. Mingi taps his door and proclaims it as theirs before moving forward. You remember the second door on the right. Luckily, there are unique designs and names on each of their doors, but still,
As you pass, you remember San and Jongho on the first left, Wooyoung and Yeosang on the first right, Seonghwa and Hongjoong second on the left. All of them had fun designs and decorations around them. In contrast, your door lay empty and bare.
They turn and look at you as you study their door. They were smiling at the headphones designed in Mingi’s name and the gaming equipment in Yunho’s. They smile at your smile, happy to see you getting comfortable.
“Who did this?” you ask curiously, looking at the door signs as you open the unlocked door.
“ah that was hongjoong hyun. He took a lettering class last semester and remade all our names as part of the project. The professor loved it. Tried to keep them, but Hongjoong told him no.” he laughs as he goes in.
Your apartment opens into a living area with a doorway arch to the left that must be the bedroom, and to the light is a kitchen/dining area. Luckily, the place comes furnished, and they have it beautifully decorated with a central couch and a TV stand. You look around after setting the duffle on the floor near the sofa.
You go to the kitchen area with the island and walk around it looking at everything you have: oven, microwave, fridge, sink, and dishwasher. It’s all nice and new. Four bar stools sat on the opposite side of the island facing into the kitchen.
You turned to look at mingi and Yunho to be greeted by them looking at you with smiles. You smile back and notice the duffle bags are gone, but the boxes are still in their hands.
“why are you guys still holding the boxes?” you ask, tilting your head in curiosity.
“Ah well, they are precious cargo, and we are still on duty,” Yunho says, still holding it with utmost care, even though it must be heavy.
“Yeah, Princess, we need to keep your belongings safe. And you, of course, but these are your most prized items.” Mingi states, holding the box protectively while making it look weightless.
“You guys,” you giggle, “you can put them down. Thank you for taking care of them.”
“of course, we saw your serious face. While it was adorable, it was still scary. We aren't facing your wrath.” Yunho says, gently putting his box on the coffee table, then raising his hands in an ‘x’ in front of his body.
You laugh at him as you open the box, Mingi setting his box down next to Yunho’s and stepping back. You pause, looking at them. You can tell their curiosity. You’re sure they think it’s inappropriate, but that’s not what these are. You laugh and open the first box.
They both try to subtly lean in to look at it, only to be shocked at the sight of cartoon DVDs. They look at each other before looking down at you in curiosity. Yunho thinks you are the picture of innocence, and Mingi believes this is a source of peace for you.
“What are those looks for you guys?” you ask nervously before opening the second box. They look at it and see a bunch of movie and TV equipment, along with some gaming devices and games, both old and new school.
“Well, Tiny. I mean, the kids' movies are a little, uh, in the nicest way possible, very on-brand for you.” Yunho says, scratching his head. He thought there was going to be something more intimate in there.
“princess, is this a Nintendo 64?” mingi asks, pointing to the box without touching it.
“Haha, yeah, it is. My dad had it locked up in storage but gave it to me over the summer. My switch is in my duffle bag somewhere.” you say, going to look at it.
“no, no, no, you don’t need to grab it. We are going to give you some space to unpack. we’ve already intruded on your time.'' Yunho says before lightly touching your shoulder. You stand up straight and nod.
“Yeah, but once this system is set up, can I come to see your setup?” Mingi asks you. His eyes go wide and sparkly as he looks at you like a puppy.
“Of course. Unfortunately for you guys, you are now stuck with m.” You say with a small smile. You already have a lot of trust in them that you haven’t had since high school.
“Good. your stick with us too.” Mingi smiles. He sees you relax slightly, and he throws you a wink. He loves your reaction and how your cheeks immediately go pink.
“Ah, alright, Mingi, let's go. Maybe Woo made something for lunch that we can steal.'' Yunho says, steering him out of your room. mingi gives you a bright smile before getting shoved out the door. Yunho goes to close the door before stopping and looking at you. “what is your name, tiny?”
“I thought it was Tiny. You claimed that the second you said it,” you said to Yunho before walking into your room area. Leaving Yunho shocked by your bold attitude and slightly falling for you. He closes the door.
On your door sign, he writes:
???, and in a bullet list, he puts Tiny and Princess. Before following mingi into the common room.
~~~~~
You smile, proud of yourself—the old you, finally growing stronger and wiser now. You grab the duffle bag you carried. Inside the bag held a mini box filled with your second-most precious items.
You set it on your bed, open the smaller duffle, and grab the photo box and tape. You start setting up a collage above your desk. Photos of your high school days, you and your best friend. The two were inseparable until graduation.
The few of your family that you have and some tiny prints you made wrap the outer edge. In the center, there is a picture missing. You know exactly which photo it is. You gave it to your first love before he went to college.
You smile sadly before making a list of things you’ll need to go out and get before you unpack too much.
Down the hall, someone looks at the photo of him and his first love. Smiling as he lightly touches their face, the frame has held that photo since graduation.
“Come on, man, Woo made food!” his roommate says in his doorway. “ah, looking at that old photo again? You haven't seen them in forever. Have you ever reconnected with them?”
“Nah, I tried once, but their parents said it wasn’t a good time. My mom told me they were struggling and hadn’t seen them since graduation.”
“That's unfortunate. I'm sorry, man.”
“It’s all good; hopefully, they’re doing well. I think of them every night before bed,” he responds with a sad smile.
“What was their name?” his roommate asks as they leave the room for the kitchen.
“y/n.” he smiles.
Tumblr media
thank you so much for reading! please comment with thoughts, reblog too! i will be working on making a tag list, be patient cause I have NO clue how to do that >.<
36 notes · View notes