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naanima · 1 year

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Oh dudes. I sometimes forget how not many of you remember or witnessed the whole Tyler Seguin as a Boston Bruins phase of hockey history. I gotta be honest I witnessed the whole thing from a distance because I was fully committed to the Flyers back then (all the heartbreak). The only thing I knew about him was that he was Bruins' hot young superstar who won the 2011 Stanley Cup with the team in his rookie year, and that he liked to party.

Dudes, the pics of him & Brad Marchand drunk & dancing on tables were legendary & amazing (below, you can Google for more on your own). Gods they were both so young.

But yes, from afar I couldn't help but like him bcos Tyler Seguin have personality in spades, and he just seemed so damn honest (so dumb). A young, talented, self aware himbo fuckboi ticked all my boxes, but I was starting to ease back from hockey due to some heartbreak. So I watched from afar, watched as his post rookie season didn't live up to the hype, watched him get skewered by the Boston media for being uncontrollable & a party animal, watched the rumours spread about how management had to post guards in front of his hotel room to stop him from making a run to get drunk & party.

It was a complete & utter shitshow bcos it was so public & must have been so humiliating for him. The Bruins organisation did nothing to protect him, they fucking let the rumours run rampant, let him be crucified. When the news came out that Boston traded him for Dallas I was shocked & angry, which took me aback bcos I wasn't even a Bruins fan or even really a Seguin fan. But the way everything went down, how front office decided on his trade (FOREVER curated on YouTube) , how the supposed last straw was him turning up to team breakfast late (I'm not even kidding - fucking breakfast? That fucking story kept on getting retold) left such a bitter taste in my mouth.

Despite all the shit that was said about him, despite the way the Boston Bruins handled everything, Tyler Seguin, the himbo has never publicly said one bad thing about the Bruins. My himbo prince might not be the smartest person, but he has always been receptive to feedback and is self aware enough not to be an asshole, in public at the least.

But honestly after Tyler's trade I only did a cursory look of his life there - he seemed happy, but didn't do further digging because I was on my way out of hockey completely.

A decade later I return to hockey, and I'm shocked that Seguin is still around, and still part of Dallas Stars. Looking back I'm fucking glad he got traded to Dallas. Bcos Dallas hockey fans fucking love him, and Seguin finally got a team of bros he can love & ho with proper. There will still be shits but Tyler Seguin went to Dallas as their superstar, as their great hope, they fucking love him. And in return he did everything he could - played the best hockey he could, broke his body, changed his playing style both physically & mentally - to get that team the Stanley Cup.

I don't know if Dallas Stars will win the Cup this year (🪵🪵🪵🪵🪵🪵), but the Stars are in the second round of the 2023 playoffs (be ashamed that Pavs got a Dick Trick and you fucks still COULDN'T win). And it has been almost exactly ten years since the Bruins traded Seguin to the Stars - 4 July 2013. Hockey & I love its narrative.

So, dear hockey gods, I don't even know if you all exists, and I know exactly how it is all superstitious bullshit. However, it has been almost exactly a decade since the fucking trade, the Bruins has been knocked out of the playoff, and in Tyler Seguin you have the perfect narrative. Are you gonna fucking deliver for me & my himbo prince?

Dallas Stars, are you going to show them all?

(Or we get fucked over, and hockey proves once again that there is NO god, superstition is bullshit, and the team who can effectively exploit the opposing team's weakness, and you know, play actually good hockey wins.)

I AM PREPARED. WILL I BE JOYOUS and roll around in the NARRATIVE, or is this gonna be my Villain Origin Story? (I'm gonna fucking support the fucking Leafs or the Oilers if these fucks lose).

#Tyler Seguin #dallas stars #boston bruins #text post

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icedbatik · 5 months

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Penguins to retire Jaromir Jagr’s No. 68 during pre-game ceremony on Feb. 18

By Pittsburgh Penguins

November 10, 2023

The Pittsburgh Penguins will raise two-time Stanley Cup Champion Jaromir Jagr’s no. 68 jersey to the rafters at PPG Paints Arena on February 18 versus the Los Angeles Kings as part of a pre-game celebration, it was announced today by the club.

As part of the ‘Celebrate 68’ festivities, all fans in attendance that night will receive a replica Jagr No. 68 banner. In addition, a commemorative Jagr bobblehead has been added as a giveaway to all fans in attendance on Thursday, March 14 versus the San Jose Sharks.

Jagr, whose NHL career spanned over two decades, is one of the most accomplished players in NHL history and a member of the league’s ‘100 Greatest Players.’ In 1,733 career regular-season games, the 6-foot-3, 230-pound winger scored 766 goals, 1,155 assists and 1,921 points. He ranks fourth all-time in games played and goals, fifth in assists, and only Wayne Gretzky (2,857) has recorded more points than him. No player in NHL history has more game-winning goals than Jagr’s 135.

Drafted by Pittsburgh in the first round (5th overall) of the 1990 NHL Draft, Jagr spent the first 11 seasons of his 24-year NHL career with the Penguins, appearing in 806 regular-season games notching 439 goals, 640 assists, 1,079 points, 78 game-winning goals and was plus-208. He is in the top-5 in franchise history in games played (5th), goals (4th), assists (4th), points (4th), plus/minus (2nd) and game-winning goals (4th). He was one of 13 captains in team history, serving in the role from 1998-01.

Jagr was an instrumental piece of Pittsburgh’s back-to-back Stanley Cup Championships in 1991 and ’92 – his first two seasons in the NHL. In that two-year span, Jagr suited up for 45 postseason contests, notching 37 points (14G-23A), which was sixth in the NHL over that stretch. Jagr shined during the 1992 Stanley Cup playoffs, recording a playoff career-high 24 points (11G-13A) in 21 games. In total, Jagr has dressed in 208 Stanley Cup Playoff contests, accumulating 201 points (78G-123A). He is one of just six players in NHL history with 200 or more playoff points.

The 10-time NHL All-Star has won a plethora of awards over the course of his NHL career. He is a five-time Art Ross Trophy winner (NHL Scoring Leader – 1995, ’98, ’99, ‘00, ’01), three-time Ted Lindsay Award winner (Most Outstanding Player – 1999, ’00, ’06), and was the recipient of the Hart Trophy (NHL MVP) in 1998-99 and Bill Masterton Trophy (Perseverance, Sportsmanship, and Dedication to Ice Hockey) in 2015-16. Jagr was named to the NHL’s First All-Star Team seven times (1995, ’96, ’98, ’99, ’00, ’01, ’06), the Second All-Star Team in 1996-97 and was a member of the All-Rookie Team in 1990-91.

Throughout NHL history, only Chris Chelios (26), Gordie Howe (26) and Mark Messier (25) have played more seasons in the NHL than Jagr’s 24. Of his 24 seasons, he notched 20-plus goals 19 times and 30-plus goals 15 times, which both rank third in league history. He’s also hit the 100-point plateau five times, and was the sixth-oldest player in NHL history to accomplish that feat during the 2005-06 season at 34 years and 31 days old.

The native of Kladno, Czechia has multiple accolades on the international stage. He’s won a gold medal (1998) and bronze medal (2006) at the Olympic Games, two gold medals (2005, ’10) and two bronze medals (1990, 2011) at the IIHF World Championship and a bronze medal at the 1990 IIHF World Junior Championship. Jagr is one of just 30 players in history to join the Triple Gold Club, which includes winning a Stanley Cup, an Olympic gold medal and an IIHF World Championship gold medal. He and Jiri Slegr are the only two players of Czech descent to accomplish this feat.

Jagr currently owns Rytiri Kladno of the Czech Extraliga and has been majority owner of the team since 2011-12.

#Jaromir Jagr #jersey retirement #it's official #February 18 - 2024 #November 10 - 2023

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leafsbabe · 1 day

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Serious, scientific question. When SidxNatexReader get married, what's their first dance song? What song do they each request to twerk to? Also, EJ & Gabe would 100% have "first" dances with Nate & Reader because they're so close and that's that. (Maybe Sid too? Idk, you tell me)

engagement wise I think they would get reader a massive rock like they have two nhl salaries they can afford it and even though Sidney would like something more simple Nate is like nope if she can hold her hand up without help it’s too small, but you’re also just getting one ring not one from each, they ask your help picking out rings for each other but they’re definitely gold boys

it’s gonna be the hockey wedding of the century even though it might be a little too much like you just want to marry your partners in peace, nope massive flowers, road blocks, several churches declaring they’d be totally cool with polygamy if you want to go that route, Nova Scotia is so close to just shutting the entire island down because their heroes are getting hitched

as to who gets the legal marriage and who just gets the commitment ceremony you do something like pull pucks from a bag and the matching ones marry but you don’t tell your guests which one is the legal marriage because to you it’s the three of you until the end and nobody is allowed to question it

the playlist is pretty mixed I feel like for the more lovey dovey ceremony part there’ll be a bunch of instrumental covers of modern songs, just keeping it on the classier end but for the party it’s hot girl central somebody better be throwing hockey ass

yes you get railed somewhere between the ceremony and the reception

cake cutting is fun and nobody ruins your hair and makeup because they want you to feel angelic all night, Sid does smash Nate’s face with wedding cake though and the guests lose their shit

there will be roughly 50 speeches, Sid cries at all of them, Nate just holds him and tries to subtly wipe away his own tears while you pat their hands like there there

the og Avs Squad also includes Tboobs (because I think him and Sid played the Olympics together and I needed a third), they choreographed a dance, yes you all get twerked on), EJ was forbidden from wearing his teeth to the wedding

if people think the alcohol bill from the 2011 Boston Bruins Stanley Cup celebration was rough they do not want to see the one for the wedding, you can’t drink any because somebody decided to knock you up the month before

the one other player that booked their wedding for the same weekend had like 2 hockey guests there and that’s it

#sidney crosby #nathan mackinnon #leafsbabe bullshit #SidDogg

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911onabc · 2 months

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3 & 19 🥰

3. If you could write a storyline for the show, what would it be?

I want to write a sports riot big emergency plot based on the 2011 Vancouver Stanley Cup Riot!!

19. If you had the same characters but had to completely change the premise of the show, what would the new setting be?

I love the episodes where all the characters are being quirky together ie. Treasure Hunt so I would love if the whole show was like that. I would put them in a Scooby Doo ass show but it’s like. This unlikely group of people commit crimes together! It’s a comedy.

#ask game

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specificallybruins · 17 days

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Moar silly captions: 2011 edition

The 2011 version of The Last Supper

"Krecho lemme kiss you"

It's a bird! It's a plane! It's...Adam McQuaid?

Fers now is not the time to be square dancing with Daniel Sedin

"OMG haiiiiii"

"Yeah that's what I thought! Too chicken to catch these hands!"

"hey lil' mama lemme whisper in your ear" (just 2 big bois)

"Would you like to see the knife I hid away earlier? It's for stabbing anyone who GETS IN MY CREASE"

Zdeno please grab the child before he runs off

This child is so bouncy where's Bergy when you need him?

"Touch the goalie, you get the chokies"

When he holds you so tenderly and stares at you with so much love in his eyes

I'm convinced Marchy learnt to shoot with the leg kick from the vets as a bonding event

"Another day, another game where Marchy starts a fight with the whole enemy team. But touch him and you deal with us" (Honestly Bruins culture at its core)

A rare bloodthirsty Krej. He looks like a vampire who just finished feeding. He looks happy. I like it. I like a happy Krej.

Remember when a little baby rookie Marchy absolutely rocked the veteran goalie Luongo? I don't, but Luongo certainly does (I haven't gotten into hockey yet)

That's all i can think of for now rip

#silly captions for goofy bois #2011 stanley cup champions #2011 stanley cup playoffs #bruins #boston bruins #nhl bruins #brad marchand #adam mcquaid #tim thomas #chris kelly #patrice bergeron #andrew ference #mark recchi #zdeno chara #dennis seidenberg #david krejci #baby marchy #there's a bunch of people i should tag but i'm too lazy and there's too many of them

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hulk- · 3 months

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As closed-mindedness continues to spread in fandom, I want to make this reminder:

People can have opinions. People are allowed to like and dislike different things, and they are allowed to post about it, even with feeling. You're not an anti for feeling strongly about characters or media in general.

But respect and consideration is important when you communicate these opinions.

The real problem starts, and the "anti" definition comes into play, when people who don't like a character start targeting users who do like the character, to argue with or otherwise heckle all of their posts. It starts when they bully people for not hating the character. It starts when they fill up the character's main tag with untagged vitriol. When they insult people who like the character. When they go around trying to censor people who write, draw, or say they relate to them. Or when they simply go around being a total raging hemorrhoid because how dare people have other opinions.

That's not cool, boo.

The opposite situation, where someone loves a character and can't stand the thought of someone disliking them, is equally annoying. In that case, you have "fanatics". And as the saying goes: "be a fan, not a fanatic."

Otherwise, you end up like the overzealous idiots in the Vancouver Stanley Cup 2011 riot. Don't incite the fandom equivalent of this riot just because you love or hate something that much. Channel it into a more productive outlet.

#fandom #critical thinking #writing #censorship #bullying #commentary

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areyoutherelarry · 9 months

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Title: Slapshot Through the Heart for 1D Tour de Fic Fest

Author: areyoutherelarry

Summary: Being the third overall draft pick comes with a lot of pressure, pressure that Shawn Mendes feels like he’s cracked under until he joins the Florida Panthers and develops a massive crush on their illustrious captain, Niall Horan. However, now that Matthew Tkachuk, the sixth overall pick from Shawn’s draft year, is joining the team, maybe Shawn overexaggerated his and Niall’s connection, maybe he is the biggest draft bust, maybe he isn’t good for the team at all.

Or the Florida Panthers’ crazy 2022-2023 season but make it a friends-to-lovers Shiall Hockey AU with a dash of Matthew Tkachuk propaganda.

@1dtourdeficfest

LONG appendix below cut (Hockey people and glossary)

NHL People

Matthew Tkachuk- (American) Rat king, nepo baby (his dad played for a long time), loves to start shit and plays very good hockey, thriving in Florida, is so obsessed with his new team, always munching on his mouth guard, went #6 in 2016 NHL entry draft, won 0 Stanley Cups (left)

Mitch Marner- (Canadian) tiny baby hockey player, adorable and smiley very good at hockey, went #4 in 2015 NHL entry draft, won 0 Stanley Cups (right)

Dylan Strome- (Canadian) long-suffering, played with Connor McDavid in juniors, considered somewhat of a bust (I love him don’t come for me), went #3 in 2015 NHL entry draft, won 0 Stanley Cups (left)

Auston Matthews- (American) another great hockey player,, known for being fashionable and ✨cool✨, went #1 in 2016 NHL entry draft, won 0 Stanley Cups (right)

Connor McDavid- (Canadian) long-suffering best player currently in the NHL, known for being boring af, went #1 in 2015 NHL entry draft, won 0 Stanley Cups (left)

Nick Foligno- (American-Canadian) I don’t know much about him, another nepo baby, went #28 in 2006 NHL entry draft, won 0 Stanley Cups (right)

Alexander Ovechkin- (Russian) will probably break Gretzky’s record for # of goals scored, is a powerhouse, considered one of the best hockey players of all-time but people consider him a showboat but like yeahhhh duh, went #1 in 2004 NHL entry draft, won 1 Stanley Cup (left)

Phil Kessel- (American) Ridiculous hockey player but was good, think stereotypical Wisconsin dude and yep you’ve got him, known for drinking Coke and eating hot dogs, went #5 in 2006 NHL entry draft, won 3 Stanley Cups (right)

Connor Bedard- (Canadian) Considered a generational talent like Connor McDavid and Sidney Crosby but is only 18, hope he isn’t crushed by the Chicago sports ecosystem (I’m from Chicago), went #1 in 2023 NHL entry draft, won 0 Stanley Cups (duh) (left)

Sidney Crosby- (Canadian) One of the best players, hockey men consider him a whiner but boo to them, he is a big weirdo who has lots of superstitions and doesn’t have public social media, an enigma, went #1 in 2005 NHL entry draft, won 3 Stanley Cups (right)

John Tavares- (Canadian) He’s such a dad, considered to have “abandoned” the Islanders, whatever, went #1 in 2009 NHL entry draft, won 0 Stanley Cups (left)

Ryan Lomberg- (Canadian) Lomberghini I don’t know much about him, chirper, went undrafted, won 0 Stanley Cups (right)

Jonathan Huberdeau- (Canadian) Huby I don’t know much about him, regularly leads teams in points, went #3 in 2011 NHL entry draft, won 0 Stanley Cups (top left)

Claude Giroux- (Canadian) Scrappy hockey player who was captain of the Philadelphia Flyers for a long time, such a dad, went #22 in 2006 NHL entry draft, won 0 Stanley Cups (top right)

Paul Maurice- (Canadian) *I’m missing how to find NHL coaches’ headshots so here’s a funny Paul pic* Says this year’s team has brought back his love of hockey, notably quit previously in the middle of the season because he just couldn’t anymore, also played but only juniors because he got hurt, won 0 Stanley Cups (left)

Sergei Bobrovsky- (Russian) Always seems long-suffering, people talk a lot of shit about Bob, went undrafted, won 0 Stanley Cups (top left)

Keith Tkachuk- (American) *This picture is hella old but he looks so much like his kids* Has lots of points because he played lots of games, comes from an NHL family, pretty chirpy even with his own kids, went #19 in 1990 NHL entry draft, won 0 Stanley Cups (left)

Brady Tkachuk- (American) *The head tilt the Tkachuk brothers do* WILL FIGHT, once got bit during a fight, captain of his team has outrageously high number of penalty minutes compared to other captains, nepo baby, the Tkachuk brothers harass and love each other very much, went #4 in 2018 NHL entry draft, won 0 Stanley Cups (right)

Tim Stützle- (German) I don’t know much about him, except he loves doing adorable antics, he and Brady are silly together, hilarious conspiracy that Matthew thinks he’s annoying, went #3 in 2020 NHL entry draft, won 0 Stanley Cups (left)

Thomas Chabot- (Canadian) I don’t know much about him, he hit a teammate in the face with his stick this year accidentally, went #18 in 2015 NHL entry draft, won 0 Stanley Cups (right)

Kris Letang- (Canadian) eternally cursed, this poor man has had two TWO strokes during his career, his dad died not long after he had his second stroke, known for being French Canadian, beautiful, and obsessed with his hair, went #62 in 2005 NHL entry draft, won 3 Stanley Cups (left)

Evgeni Malkin- (Russian) is so moody, will fight you if you irk him just a little bit, also considered whiny with Sid, loves to chirp those he loves, loves jokes and is funny, went #2 in 2004 NHL entry draft, won 3 Stanley Cups (right)

Eric Staal- (Canadian) homophobe, one of four Staal brothers who have played in the NHL, went #2 in 2003 NHL entry draft, won 1 Stanley Cup (left)

Marc Staal- (Canadian) homophobe, one of four Staal brothers who have played in the NHL, went #12 in 2015 NHL entry draft, won 0 Stanley Cups (right)

NHL Glossary (most of this was copy and pasted from around the internet)

The Presidents' Trophy- The Presidents' Trophy is an award presented by the NHL to the team that finishes with the most points during the NHL regular season. Teams get two points for each win, one point for each tie, and no points for a loss

The Presidents' Trophy Curse- Finishing with the best record in the regular season has become a dubious distinction: Only twice in 20 years has the Presidents' Trophy winner gone on to win the Stanley Cup — most recently a decade ago when the Blackhawks beat Boston in the final. Since then, only one team has made it past the second round.

Captain- In ice hockey, the captain is the player designated by a team as the only person authorized to speak with the game officials regarding rule interpretations when the captain is on the ice. At most levels of play each team must designate one captain and a number of alternate captains (usually two or three) who speak to the officials when the captain is on the bench.

BioSteel Camp- The annual BioSteel NHL CAMP is a four-day event where 30 of the top hockey stars and prospects go through both on- and off- ice training as the NHL season start is just around the corner.

London Knights- The London Knights are a junior ice hockey team from London, Ontario, Canada, playing in the Ontario Hockey League, one of the leagues of the Canadian Hockey League.

Memorial Cup- The Memorial Cup is the national championship of the Canadian Hockey League, a consortium of three major junior ice hockey leagues operating in Canada and parts of the United States. It is a four-team round-robin tournament played between the champions of the Ontario Hockey League (OHL), Quebec Major Junior Hockey League (QMJHL) and Western Hockey League (WHL), and a fourth, hosting team, which alternates between the three leagues annually.

Chirp-Hockey insults are known as "chirps.” The basic theory behind any kind of trash-talking is that, by disrupting your opponent's concentration and confidence through chirping, you gain a competitive edge that might just help you win.

The Show- Many players refer to the NHL as “the show”

Training Camp- NHL training camp is the period when professional ice hockey clubs gather to prepare and enhance themselves for the next season. It starts before the start of the regular season.

Development Camp- Development Camp provides an opportunity for prospects to showcase their talents and show management and staff that they are progressing in the right direction. Players at camp are all looking to prove different things. Some camp goers will be looking to prove they're NHL-ready, some will be hoping to show the staff they've improved on areas of need based on last year's camp, some are looking to be signed and some are looking to make a good first impression, along with much more.

Prospect- A prospect is typically a player who was drafted and/or signed by an NHL team, and is assigned to a development farm team. These development leagues are the American Hockey League and the ECHL. Besides these minor leagues, draft picks may continue playing for the team that they were drafted from in the Canadian Hockey League (consisting of the Ontario Hockey League, Quebec Major Junior Hockey League, and Western Hockey League), the NCAA, the United States Hockey League, various European leagues such as the Czech Extraliga, Finnish Liiga, German Deutsche Eishockey Liga, Russian Kontinental Hockey League, Slovak Extraliga, Swedish Hockey League, the Norwegian Fjordkraftligaen or Swiss National League.

Messier Trophy- The Mark Messier Leadership Award is a NHL award that recognizes an individual as a superior leader within their sport and as a contributing member of society.

Selke- The Frank J. Selke Trophy is an annual award given "to the forward who best excels in the defensive aspects of the game." The winner is selected in a poll of the Professional Hockey Writers Association at the end of the regular season.

Waivers- Waivers is an NHL labor management procedure by which an NHL team makes a professional ice hockey player's contract and rights available to all other NHL teams. Other NHL teams "waive" any claim to a player designated for assignment in the American Hockey League (AHL) or designated for release. This means another team could sign that player to their NHL team before they go to the minors.

Celly- Slang for “celebration” and refers to the expression of joy after a player scores a goal; a celly comes in many forms and can range from a fist pump to sheathing a stick as if it were a sword to belly-sliding across the ice. The degree of celly is typically correlated to the importance of the goal.

Liney- The lines in hockey refer to the different lineups that teams utilize throughout the game. Each line typically consists of three forwards, a center and two wingers on either side of the center, and two defensemen. Usually, teams field four lines of forwards and three lines of defensemen. A liney is a player on the same line.

Cross Check- Cross-checking is “The action of using the shaft of the stick between the two hands to forcefully check an opponent.”

Empty Net- Empty net goals usually occur on two occasions in ice hockey: In the final minutes of a game, if a team is within two goals, they will often pull the goalie, leaving the net defenseless, for an extra attacker, in order to have a better chance of scoring to either tie or get within one goal. OR In the case of a delayed penalty, the non-offending team will often pull their goaltender for an extra attacker in this situation as well.

Shift- A hockey shift is when a “line” takes their turn to play while the other lines take a break on the bench to rest. Each line rotates about every 45 seconds to keep the game intensity up and give players time to rest.

Holding- Holding is any action by a player that restrains an opposing player by impeding their progress whether or not they are in possession of the puck, or by such action prohibiting their ability to pass, shoot, receive, or otherwise propel the puck.

The Box- The penalty box or sin bin (sometimes called the bad box, or simply bin or box) is the area in ice hockey where a player sits to serve the time of a given penalty, for an offense not severe enough to merit outright expulsion from the game.

Powerplay- In ice hockey, a team is considered to be on a power play when at least one opposing player is serving a penalty, and the team has a numerical advantage on the ice (whenever both teams have the same number of players on the ice, there is no power play).

Shoot-out Goal- A hockey shootout is a penalty shot competition used to decide the result of a game that is tied after regulation time and is still tied at the end of overtime. In a shootout, a player starts with the puck at center ice and has a scoring opportunity 1-1 against the opposing team's goalie. The puck can only move forwards. If it moves backwards, the play is considered dead.

Gentleman’s Sweep- A gentleman's sweep is where a team wins a playoff series but loses one game leading to a 4–1 win. It is called a gentleman's sweep under the pretense that it would be rude and unsporting to embarrass a team with a 4–0 victory, so the winning team lets the other team win a game to save face.

Important References

2022 FL Panthers Primer

Matthew Tkachuk Daddy Issues

Hockey Fun Facts

Florida’s Schedule

Shiall Timeline

Dylan Strome Primer

2015 Draft Class

Matthew Tkachuk

#1dtourdeficfest #1D Tour de Fic Fest #shiall au #so much hockey #please don't laugh at my horrible photoshop skills lol look at niall on sasha's body #i spent a lot of time on the appendix please read #niall horan #shawn mendes #matthew tkachuk

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authortobenamedlater · 5 months

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Since tomorrow is S4 even though I won’t get to watch it until Saturday, here are my For All Mankind predictions:

This is Ed’s last season at least as a major character. He’s 70-something now. I have a feeling he’ll die since that’s how this show likes to send out its main characters, but even if he doesn’t, he’s getting too old to be the show’s driving force.

Sergei will bust Margo out of the USSR.

We will learn that Margo traded herself for Sergei and family’s safe passage to the US. She goes to work for Roscosmos and gives them info on NASA, the KGB looks the other way while Sergei and his family get airlifted out of Moscow.

Maybe Margo is a double agent? Mr is convinced of this. I wouldn’t be surprised.

Kelly and baby are living on Mars with Grandpa Ed. Ed calls his grandson (I think it was a son anyway) his favorite Martian.

Ed and Wayne have weekly emotional support phone calls. Maybe not. But they should.

Danny is still living in exile in the crashed North Korean landing module, probably starting to act like Tom Hanks’s character in Castaway. Maybe he named his helmet Wilson.

Things I’m wondering:

If 9/11 ever happened

If the American female gymnasts still won gold in 1996 (if they didn’t I will set something on fire)

If George W. Bush is President and if not, is it Al Gore or someone else

If the USSR will ever fall and how will it happen

If the Patriots won Super Bowls XXXVI and XXXVII (some things are important)

If the Red Sox win the 2004 World Series (some things are VERY important)

Depending on how many years the season covers, if the Bruins win the Stanley Cup in 2011 (again with important things)

Don’t know what I’m talking about? Get AppleTV and find out. You can watch all three seasons if you start right now.

#for all mankind

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9116 · 2 years

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Toronto Maple Leafs forward Jason Spezza announced today his retirement from the National Hockey League after 19 seasons. With his announcement, Spezza will be joining the Maple Leafs' front office as Special Assistant to General Manager Kyle Dubas effective immediately.

"It is difficult to describe just how much of a lasting and positive impact that Jason Spezza made in his three seasons with the Maple Leafs," said General Manager Kyle Dubas. "Jason's passion for the game of hockey, his desire to continuously push himself and his teammates to improve, as well as his capacity to make strong connections with all members of the organization, have been invaluable. Though today marks the end of his tenure with us as a player, it is a pleasure to have him join our front office to impart all that he has to offer."

Spezza, 38, recorded 995 points (363G, 632A) through 1,248 career regular season NHL games split between the Maple Leafs, Dallas Stars and Ottawa Senators while collecting 76 points (28G, 48A) in 97 career Stanley Cup Playoff games. The two-time NHL All-Star (2008, 2012) ranks in the top 100 on the NHL's all-time list for games played (t-96th), assists (80th) and points (94th). In addition to serving as the eighth captain in Senators franchise history, Spezza sits sixth in all-time club games played (686), and second in goals (251), assists (436) and points (687) through his 11 seasons in Ottawa.

Internationally, Spezza has represented Canada at the IIHF World Championship four times (2008, 2009, 2011, 2015), the IIHF World Junior Championship three times (2000, 2001, 2002) and the Spengler Cup in 2012. Spezza won a gold (2015) and two silver medals (2008, 2009) at the IIHF World Championship and captured a silver (2002) and two bronze medals (2000, 2001) at the IIHF World Junior Championship. He also won the 2012 Spengler Cup with Team Canada.

Spezza was originally selected by Ottawa in the first round (2nd overall) of the 2001 NHL Draft.

Statement from Jason Spezza:

"I love hockey. Since the age of three, I've been lucky enough to live out my dream and do what I love for so many years," said Spezza. "I eat, sleep, dream hockey and it's always been there for me. There are too many people to thank individually but I'm forever grateful and indebted to the Ottawa Senators, Dallas Stars, Toronto Maple Leafs and Hockey Canada for their support and belief in me as a player and person. To my teammates, coaches, support staff, trainers and equipment staff - a heartful thank you for everything. Through countless hours at the rink - whether on the ice or with those behind the scenes - I have been so fortunate to have forged friendships for life.

Hockey has been my life's work and to be able to come home to Toronto and bookend my playing career where it started was incredible. To the fans - in Ottawa, Dallas, Toronto and across the league - your impact on the game is immeasurable. I'll never be able to replicate that feeling of stepping onto the ice to the roar of the crowd, but it is something I'll always remember. Thank you.

Looking forward, I'm very grateful to the Leafs for the amazing opportunity to transition into this new role. It enables me to continue to follow my passion; learn and live new experiences within the game I love.

Lastly, none of this happens without the unwavering support of my parents, siblings, wife, and kids. You have always been my cornerstone."

#🥹#jason spezza

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