#Short novel

[hunwes]

Aaaand... voilà! It's yours ❤️🤰❤️

"Did you really thought that using condom will be enough to crop down my reproductive instincts my love? Oh you were so wrong. Guess what: all your condoms are poked. So no, Mister! You won't just gonna have fun without giving me your genuine human seeds inside me to have your baby. You know I need to give birth as many hybrid babies as possible... why are you complaining? You don't need to pay that much for our half-alien love children. They are excellent in self-sustaining. No need to nurture them that much... what? 66 babies aren't enough for me?... well apparently no. How many times I have to tell you this? I have to spawn as many aliens as possible. You've agreed to help me with this mission. I told you there's no turning back. Anyway you're the best match for me to breed with. And you better confess now: you like to get me knocked up, aren't you?... now there you go. So skip yapping all the time. There's a better thing to do now. My alien cunt is itching. I need you to make me feel a woman again. So we better get this jeans off you again. That bulge must be uncomfortable anyway. Let's release what's inside, okay?"

#pregnancy #pregnant #preggo kink #pregnant kink #preggie #preggophilia #pregnancy fantasy #fanfic #alien pregnancy #short novel #accelerated pregnancy #rapid pregnancy #getting pregnant #big pregnant belly #ready to pop #alien mommy #alien mom #mom to be #unprotected sex #pregnantbelly #pregnantfetish #pregnantgril #fan fiction #alien girlfriend

[lifestoriesofourworld]

The son entered the university as a gift for his 17th birthday, which was a month before the summer exams. His mother was not yet 40 years old. She had divorced her husband when her son entered first grade, decided to devote herself to her son, and so she was happy when her son entered university the first time, because at that time they could not pay for the contract, and they did not want to postpone his studies for a year. In the autumn, my son entered the first year of university, and in addition to studying, he met people from the group. Everything was going well until, during one of the breaks, he was approached by a tall foreign student from Africa who was looking for a room to rent as half of the dormitory was undergoing renovation, and said that his parents would send him money to pay for the room and his own expenses. The son could not refuse and said that he would discuss the offer at home and give a final answer the next day. The foreign student said he would return the next day to find out the final answer. When the son returned from the university, he said that the foreign student wanted to rent a room. His mother agreed and said that the room was free and that they could use the money for additional needs that they had been denying themselves. The next day, the son agreed and the foreign student could move into the apartment where the son was living the following day. The day came when the son and his foreign friend were returning home after classes. Coming home early because the classes ended early and his mother was not home yet, the son decided to show the foreign student around the room and the apartment. When the mother returned home, he immediately introduced the foreign student who was renting the room. After the introduction, the mother suggested having dinner in the kitchen and discussing everything in detail. During dinner, they learned that the foreign student was a year older than her son and had come from Nigeria to study. After dinner, everyone went to bed.

It was just under three months before the New Year, and it had been a month since the international student had rented a room. It was his mother's birthday, she was expecting guests and, as is customary on such occasions, she wore a dress that only emphasised her figure. During the celebration, the foreign student complimented his son on his mother's beauty. After the birthday, the foreign student began to look at his mother differently. The son tried not to take these views seriously and attributed them to his youth. Shortly before the New Year, the foreign student asked the son what he could give his mother for the New Year. The son could not answer anything specific, except to say what things his mother likes and what she pays attention to. Then the foreign student decided to make a gift for his mother himself.

On New Year's Eve, when everyone sat down at the New Year's table, my mother wore the same dress she wore on her birthday. When the clock struck the first seconds of the new year, the first congratulations were heard and it was time to open presents, and the biggest gift was a gift from a foreign student for his girlfriend's mother in the form of a women's skin care kit. For the mother, this gift came as a surprise from the foreign student and she said that he did not need to spend so much money on the gift. The international student said that it was not just a gift, but a thank you for providing a room for the duration of his studies at the university. Subsequently, the foreign student repeatedly gave small gifts and even flowers, which the mother refused but accepted anyway. The son thought that this was a temporary phenomenon, that the foreign student would calm down and eventually everything would return to normal, as it had been before the new year.

It was spring, the beginning of March to be exact, and the mother's son was used to going to bed early because classes started at eight o'clock the next day, and one day he got out of bed shortly before midnight to go to the toilet. As he left his room to go to the toilet, he heard sounds coming from his mother's room. The son went over and opened the door, about 10 centimetres, and through the crack he saw his mother leaning against the wall, with a foreign student standing behind her, pacing back and forth. The son was shocked and confused by this situation. The mother leaned over and leaned on the bed as the foreign student approached her from behind and started walking back and forth. The sounds coming from the bed, as well as the mother's moans, were drowned out by the sound of the TV. After standing there for no more than 3 minutes, the son went to the toilet, and on his way back he stopped to see what was happening in his mother's room, and then the foreign student on the bed put his mother's legs on his shoulders and began to move back and forth. After standing there for a while, the son went to his room to go to bed, but he could not sleep for a long time because he had seen the scene in his mother's room. In the morning, the son woke up, but the foreign student was still asleep because he had to leave for university early. The mother was in the kitchen preparing breakfast, and the son pretended that nothing had happened, washed his face and sat down at the table. The mother and son were getting dressed when the foreign student woke up, and the mother said that she had prepared food for him and left it on the stove. The foreign student behaved as usual, as if nothing had happened during the night, and thanked his mother for breakfast. While studying at the university, the son kept thinking about what he had seen in his mother's room and whether what had happened between the foreign student and his mother that night would happen again the next time.

Returning home before everyone else, the son wanted to check if the situation that had happened the previous night would not happen again. His mother came home from work at her usual time, and the foreign student came home late because he had classes at the university until the evening. After dinner, the son went to his room and decided to wait for the usual time to see what would happen in his mother's room. The clock struck 23:00 and it was quiet in the corridor, so the son went out into the corridor, but when he passed his mother's room, he did not hear a sound and, opening the door, saw that his mother was sleeping peacefully, after which he closed the door and went to his room, thinking that it was a one-off incident. The next day, on Friday, everything was as usual: in the morning, my mother went to work, and my son and the foreign student left later than planned because there were few couples and classes started later. In the evening, there were no intrigues, everyone went to bed later because Saturday was a day off, and the son and the foreign student went to their rooms almost simultaneously. The son decided to check if the situation would repeat itself. Soon he heard a noise in the corridor and, after waiting for about 10 minutes, he went outside and saw that the door to the foreigner's room was not fully closed, so he opened the door a little and saw an empty bed. Then the son realised he had to go to his mother's room and decided to check it out. When he opened the door a little, he saw that the foreign student was lying in bed with his mother, and the TV was on, probably to drown out the sounds coming from the bed. While lying on the bed, the foreign student put his mother's legs on his shoulders and started moving back and forth. At first, the movements were slow and gradually began to intensify, and when the movements accelerated, the mother began to moan and then the son saw that his mother's legs were trembling, at which point it became clear that the mother had an orgasm. After 2-3 minutes, as soon as the mother came to her senses after the orgasm, the foreign student turned the mother over onto her stomach, then lay on top of her and began to make gradual back and forth movements. The son could not stand at the door for long because he was afraid of being seen, so he decided to leave early. When he returned to his room, the son concluded that sex between his mother and the foreign student did not take place every day, but at most 3-5 times a week, and further observations would confirm this.

This could not last. A month before his birthday, the son got out of bed to go to the toilet. As the son was walking to the toilet, a foreign student came out of the mother's room and it was a shock for everyone to meet and explain to the mother's son that he had accidentally entered the mother's room and his appearance allowed the son to ask the foreign student how long he had been in the mother's room and whether it was the first time he had entered it. The foreigner began to explain until the mother interrupted him, wanting to apologise to her son for his inappropriate behaviour. In the morning, when the mother got up early, she prepared food and went to work because the son and the foreign student had to go to classes at the university. When the son and the foreign student got up and sat down at the table after all the household chores, the foreign student offered to be present during sex with the mother as an apology. The son looked at him and thought why not. After some thought, the son agreed, and then the foreign student said that next time he would invite his mother's son. In the evening, when everyone gathered for dinner, the mother had no idea what would happen that night. When everyone went to their rooms, around 23:00, the foreign student entered the son's room and told him that he could get up and go to his mother's room. Upon entering the mother's room, the foreign student immediately went to turn on the TV, and when the mother woke up, she immediately asked what the foreign student was going to do. The son went to the other side of the room, where he took a chair, turned it around and sat down facing the bed. The mother got angry and got out of bed to make her son and the foreign student go to bed because they had to get up early tomorrow. The foreign student managed to undress and then grabbed the mother by the arm and threw her on the bed. The mother began to resist and shouted for him to stop immediately and asked her son to help, but the son just looked on. The foreign student asked her to calm down and tried to crawl between the mother's legs. When the foreign student was between the mother's legs, the resistance became less and he started moving back and forth. The mother realised that she would not be able to free herself so easily, so she stopped resisting and asked her son to leave the room, but the son ignored this request and continued to watch, while the mother began to moan more and look at her son with frightened eyes. The sex lasted about 30 minutes, after which the foreign student and the mother's son went to their rooms, leaving the mother crying in bed. In the morning, the mother was silent and did not say anything about what had happened the day before. In the evening, everyone gathered at the table and the mother said that what had happened was the last time, but the son said that everything was fine and they could continue, to which the mother replied that the son had no conscience to humiliate his mother like that. In the evening, the son and the foreign student decided not to do anything, and the next evening they repeated the same thing, and then the mother decided to agree without resistance. Then the son and the foreign student repeated the same thing many times, and the mother eventually got used to such situations.

When his son's birthday came, the foreign student decided to give him a video camera. It was an unusual gift for his son, and when the evening came, the foreign student suggested that he make his first video of his mother and the foreign student having sex. The son was interested in the idea and decided to make the video. The foreign student and the mother's son went to the mother's room and the son started filming and the mother told him to stop filming or it would be bad, but the foreign student quickly calmed the mother down and she started enjoying the sex.

In the middle of the summer, the foreign student returned home, and the second half of the summer was peaceful for the son and his mother.

At the end of the summer, when the foreign student returned before the new academic year. This time, the mother took the foreign student's request calmly, as if it were a matter of course, and even after dinner, the foreign student went to his mother's room, as he had done before. It is no longer a secret to the son that his mother and the foreign student indulge in intimate pleasures on weekends during the day if everyone stays at home. Life with the new academic year began in the same way as the previous one: the son and the foreign student went to university for classes, the mother went to work, and in the evening the foreign student occasionally came to his mother's room.

One day, the foreign student suggested that they go shopping at the weekend to buy something for his mother. The mother did not want to go for a long time and finally decided to go. The weekend came and the son and the foreign student got up early to go shopping. The foreign student, the son and the mother went to the same shopping centre. The shopping went well and everyone was home in the afternoon. The international student asked his mother to try on some new clothes and said that his mother should wear one of them in the evening. When evening came and everyone was sitting around the table, his mother was wearing a dress and sandals that she had bought at the mall during the day. After dinner, the foreign student would go with his mother to her room. Over time, this became the norm, and each time my mother wore different outfits that she had bought at the mall.

Meanwhile, as her birthday approached, a foreign student decided to give her a gift, a watch to be exact. On her birthday, my mother wore a dress she had bought at the mall and impressed the guests. After the birthday party, life went on as usual: the foreign student had sex with his friend's mother from time to time, and this continued until the new year. Over the past year, his mother had changed, changed her hairstyle and looked younger than before.

On New Year's Eve, the foreign student decided to make an unusual gift. When the clock struck the first seconds of the new year, the foreign student handed his mother a box with a ring, which was a declaration of love. It was a shock for the mother, who was speechless, and it was unusual for the son to be in such a situation. The mother looked at her son and asked what she should do, to which the son replied that it was a decision his mother should make. After some thought, the mother accepted the gift, and then the foreign student kissed the mother on the lips. After that, the mother's life changed, as the foreign student now sleeps in the same bed as his friend's mother.

A month later, the foreign student told his son that his mother was preparing for pregnancy, that sex had become more serious than before, and that she was only 40 years old and could become pregnant and carry a child. Two months after he told him this, his mother told him that she was pregnant, and three months later that she was having twins. The international student bought his friend's mother a black robe with patterns that showed her beautiful body. The foreign student registered the marriage and stayed to live with his mother. Later he plans to finish his studies at university and get a job, but for now he plans to provide for his family with money that will be sent to him from his home country, as his father works for an oil company.

#pregnancy #pregnant #preggie #baby bump #short novel #fan fiction #beautiful mature #mature woman #mature mom #pretty #stunning #gorgeous #beautiful #pretty woman #pretty women #cute woman #cute women #beauttiful woman #beautiful women #woman #women #hotwives #interracial #interracial couple #interracial love #blacked #interracial breeding #black breeding #white women black men #black husband

[goriromano]

Per prima cosa lavò tutto il corpo dopo i tre giorni passati tra lo sguazzo e i divani che la ospitarono dopo la furia

Sciacquò bene le gambe strofinando con vigore l'inguine e gli interni coscia per il sospetto di essersi la prima notte pisciata sui pantaloni con cui dormì e che vennero nascosti in una cesta sotto altra biancheria

Liliade asciugata pensava di poter trovare durante l'inverno una cura nella confessione, ben coperta con il nuovo montone che le amicizie residue la obbligarono ad acquistare

Dimenticò soltanto di nascondere le mani e la pellecchia smangiata che incoronava le sue unghie.

Con l'arrivo del sole dovette rinunciare alle tasche come rifugio, e alcuni sguardi ancora pieni di incazzatura continuavano a rimproverare per lo sguazzo il piscio e la pellecchia

Occhiate avvolte nelle vecchie camicie nere ereditate dalle ronde

A cui volle rispondere soltanto con un inchino e i polsi annodati dietro la schiena

Con un silenzio che augurava loro di non cadere mai in errore e riempire per vizio o debolezza una vasca di mota per poi scivolarci dentro

Senza una reale coscienza delle cose

Immagini: Emiliano Gori

Scritto: Gianni Romano

#drawing #art #scrittura #illustration #fotografia #primo post #short novel #books & libraries #master of the universe #he man

[driella]

https://docs.google.com/document/d/1S08VOY-cyF-LLLZ9lLiKcbT0LSsZI7bDAVe3nmXDe_s/edit?usp=drivesdk

My recent short novel😭(I did not edit it so yeah and quite a poor written novel:/)

And because I'm bored, I made their playlist

#dark academia #writing #literature #short novel #gay novel #shut up I made their playlist #Spotify

[justthoughts1310]

10 Year Reunion

I want to do something I've never done before. I want to post my original story. Please bare with me it's long (24 pages in words 1.5 space) and it has typos, but I will feel so blessed if you read it. Thank you!

High School Reunion (10 Years)

Author Forward:

            I want to start by saying that all the people in the story are real people whose names have been changed. I wanted to share this story in order to share my truth. However, to all of those internet sleuths out there, please do not try to identify the people in this story, and please do not dox any of us. The people in this story are all deeply important to me, except the ones who aren’t. Even those people are deserving of the utmost respect and are complex and multi-dimensional human beings who have real human emotions and a right to privacy.

            This story is the illustration of my dream and my hope for the future. That’s important, because as I former Christian I strongly believe in the Secret: the power of manifestation. I have literally been able to manifest everything else in my life that I have moved towards, excluding the healing of this particular relationship. I feel that I have exhausted my ways to appropriately move towards manifesting this desire of mine, so I am (anonymously) letting my desire be known to the world.

            I do not know how my story will be perceived in this story, whether good or bad. However, please remember two things: 1. I am human and worthy of grace. 2. I am not blameless.

            I hope that this story will entertain you all. I hope that it will move some of you and make others feel seen. If you learn anything at all from this story, I want you to learn that your feelings are valid and your feelings are real.

            You are not weird to want reconciliation and healing within your broken relationship. You’re not wrong for still loving that friend, partner, sibling, or parent that you lost connection with many years ago. You are simply a human having a human experience. You have the right to feel, and you have the right to love.

May – July 2025

            The high school reunion was everything Audrey thought that it would be, or maybe it wasn’t. It gave DMV or high school prom vibes. Audrey swirled her drink around her cup. In truth, she didn’t really want to be here, and she didn’t expect that many other people wanted to be here either.

            She was of the mind of many people. She didn’t need to be here, because everyone from high school who still mattered to her was actively part of her life still do this day. Everyone that was except for her: Anika Sharma.

            Audrey’s heart ached as the thought of Anika’s name echoed through her head. Her girlfriend winced in discomfort next to her, and she swiftly pulled away her hand and scolded Audrey. Audrey was quick to apologize. She had a tendency of accidentally squeezing or scratching Dunni whenever she was deep in thought. It was actually one of the main reasons that Dunni did not enjoy holding Audrey’s hand, despite Audrey’s protests and need for physical touch.

            Srinthi shifted next to her.

            “Oh look… there’s so-and-so…” Srinthi’s sweet voice rang out as she pointed to a small group of people that she was far more familiar with than Audrey ever was. Audrey frowned. She wasn’t interested in any of them, and she was ready to leave.

            Srinthi looked up and back and her with big eyes and kind face.

            “Go ahead and talk to them.” Audrey spoke encouragingly. “I’ll be here when you get back.” Audrey promised her dear friend of many years.

            “Are you sure you don’t want to talk to more people…?” Dunni asked.

            The room was somewhat disparate. Audrey had thought long and hard for nearly a year of who she would want to see if she saw anyone at all. Only a couple of names came to mind: Destinee and Raymond.

            Destinee didn’t know it, but Destinee had saved Audrey’s life. Deeply suicidal, Audrey wasn’t convinced that she would still be here today without Destinee’s intervention. A decade ago, Audrey was ready to end it all, and she was convinced that no one would care.

            Then there was Raymond. Still to this day, Audrey believed Raymond to be God’s greatest gift to the Earth. He, alone, was the kindest man she had ever met. His thoughtfulness and consideration blew Audrey away, and she felt blessed to have had known him even if it had only been for a season.

            I guess seeing some of the teachers was nice too, but it felt like something that she could have done at any time. Obviously, she couldn’t see all her old favorite teachers. Many of them had left like Mr. Herschel, Senorita Roberts, and Ms. Allen. However, many good ones who Audrey held dear to her heart stayed such as Mr. Alexander, Mrs. Fooks, Dr. Howard, and Mr. Jameson.

            There was one other person Audrey wondered if she wanted to see. She didn’t know what emotions she’d feel in their presence, but she felt that it was plausible that she would make an experience: Carina Lo. In Audrey’s mind, she had always seen Carina as a gate keeper to Anika. A part of her wondered, if she could just speak to Carina and get through to Carina, that maybe she’d have the chance to speak to Anika.

            Audrey was no longer certain if this was true, and every year that went by made Audrey less certain. She was sure the two of them were still good friends, but she wasn’t sure that Anika still hung on Carina’s every word as she once had.   

            “If you’re just going to stand here, then I’m going to go get some free food.” Dunni shrugged. Audrey gave a short nod of acknowledgement without looking at her girlfriend, and her girlfriend headed off to the buffet table.

            Audrey perched herself on the corner of the table and waited for her party to return to her. She released a long sigh and her shoulders dropped. She wasn’t sure if she wanted Alyse to be here with her. She figured that Alyse wouldn’t come and neither would anyone who lived out of state. Why would they? It was just a 10-year reunion. It wasn’t a 20-year reunion, and a lot of people hadn’t accomplished what they wanted to accomplish yet.

            Audrey had just been awarded her Associate of the Society of Actuaries (ASA) a few months prior, but she still wasn’t an FSA yet. In the same way, she imagined that many people who studied to be doctors were either still in medical school, still residents, or just started their first year of work as full-realized doctors. Though making it though medical school was a great accomplishment, it was hardly a bragging point when you remembered the low beginning salary and the crippling student loan debt.

            Audrey looked down at her watch. An hour had already gone by.

            “Oh… well…” This was a good opportunity to leave, go home, and drown her sorrows in some Bruster’s ice cream or some Cheesecake Factory cheesecake, maybe have sex with Dunni, and watch a movie on HBO Max or Prime Video.

            She watched as from the far corners of the room, Dunni and Srinthi began to head back towards her, when she saw three figures enter the room.

            The first figure was really tall and frankly unmistakable. Audrey’s heart skipped a beat and her mouth filled with acid. She often told herself that she didn’t care, but she knew that deep within her there was a part of her that was still mad at Tabitha. Audrey ground her teeth and pursed her lips.

            Srinthi looked back and noticed Tabitha. She looked as if she were going to say nothing, but she saw Audrey’s face and decided against it.

            “We can go home if you want…” Srinthi began to say, but she stopped when she saw Audrey intently analyzing the second tallest figure. The room was still smokey with fog, but Srinthi and Audrey were both able to make out the figure.

            Audrey would say that the woman was far more beautiful than Audrey remembered, but that wasn’t true. By pure coincidence, Audrey had accidentally seen her on the Model Path Trail in 2021. She had watched the woman intently, because she thought she was a stunning Asian woman, which was fine. There were many stunning Asian women, but there was something about this specific woman that made Audrey look longer, until she saw it all at once. The woman was Carina Lo.

            Carina Lo: the woman who was single handedly accountable for breaking Audrey’s heart and destroyed her trust, because she meddled in Audrey’s relationship with Anika in the most malicious of ways.

            Audrey wasn’t entirely surprised that Carina was here. Carina still lived in Georgia, and she was also such a fucking shmooze-er. She was appearance and network driven. She always knew the right thing to say, and in Audrey’s distant experience, she had difficultly being sincere.

            An expertly cut bob and a better fitting wardrobe had turned Carina from a funny looking girl to a true aesthetic beauty of a woman. Despite Audrey’s distaste for Carina, Audrey couldn’t deny that Carina had found her look and had subsequently become gorgeous.

            Audrey shook her head slowly. She watched the group like a predator, and she unconsciously brought her knuckles to her lips.

            Should she say anything? Should she say anything at all?             A small part of her wanted to speak to Carina, but another part of her would not mind never speaking to Carina again, less Carina deceive Audrey and give her false hope.

            The third figure was obviously shorter, and they seemed to tuck themselves behind Carina and Tabitha. The group moved as one to another group of people who stood closer to the dance floor. The two groups greeted each other gleefully and the room became noticeably louder.

            The group shifted ever so slightly, and the third figure was finally revealed.

            “Ugh…” Audrey’s breath caught in her throat. Her hand instinctively gripped the table and her jaw unconsciously locked. Her heartbeat quickened, and tears burned at the corners of her eyes. Unfortunately, Audrey didn’t know how to cry.

            Audrey did not know what to do. She had not planned for this in a meaningful way. She wanted to run away. She wanted to scream. She wanted to cry. She wanted to throw herself into Anika Sharma’s arms and bare her soul to Anika all night. She wanted to tell Anika everything that happened over the last ten years.

            Yet, despite all of that, Audrey stayed frozen in place. She felt trapped within herself. This felt like all of Audrey’s PTSD nightmares over the last ten years come to life, but Audrey wanted to this. She still wanted Anika. She always had.

            Audrey steadied her breathing and found herself enough to blink. A single tear rolled down her cheek.

            This was the whole reason she came here tonight. She came her tonight for the slimmest chance of being able to see Anika here, talk to her, and fix what had been broken 10 years ago. She just didn’t actually believe that Anika would come. She thought that Anika would avoid this place, like the plague out of fear that Audrey would be here.

            Audrey stood up steadying her feet under her.

            Dunni noticed the tear that had slipped down her girlfriend’s cheek. Her eyes followed Audrey’s, and she saw the petite woman (taller than Srinthi) standing on the other side of the room. She had never seen a picture of Anika before, but she knew it was Anika as soon as she saw her. Anika was absolutely gorgeous. She looked like the sun itself with the mane of a lion.

            Dunni found her own heartbeat quickening. Suddenly, her stomach felt unsettled, and she wished that she had not eaten as much as she did. Though, Dunni had never thought she would find love, she found it with Audrey. There was no doubt in Dunni’s mind that Audrey was the love of her life. Yet, Dunni often found herself doubting if Audrey felt the same way.

            She witnessed how much time Audrey spent thinking about Anika. She saw all the pain, agony, distress and longing Audrey felt over Anika. A part of Dunni wondered if Anika was, in fact, the love of Audrey’s life, but Dunni was too afraid to ask. In truth, Audrey was also afraid to answer.

            Could this be the moment that Dunni lost everything? She had finally allowed herself to believe that she could have forever with Audrey and that the two of them could be married. Now, she was watching Audrey silently cry over another woman that she at one point was very much in love with.

            “Hey…?” Audrey grabbed Dunni gently. She forced a reassuring smile as she looked at Dunni. Her eyes tried to convince Dunni that this was all she wanted: that Dunni’s love, and Srinthi’s friendship were more than enough. “We can leave now if you want?” Audrey offered Dunni.

            Dunni blinked. Everything in Dunni’s body screamed ‘yes’. She desperately wanted to run the hell up out of there. She wanted to drag Audrey to the courthouse out of fear of losing her, but she knew that if Audrey didn’t try to talk to Anika today, that she would always wonder. Dunni shook her head. Audrey and Dunni had been together for almost four years, and Dunni was so fucking tired of living with the ghost of Anika every day. She was so fucking tired of sleeping with the ghost of Anika.

            This needed to end one way or another, and they both had the opportunity to make that happen today.

            “You should go talk to her.” Dunni finally found her voice again. Her voice was soft, barely audible but strong. She spoke with an unwavering conviction that surprised even her.

            “How could she just be okay with Audrey going to speak with her ex?” They both wondered in unison. For Audrey, she saw Anika as her ex-best friend. For Dunni, none of that mattered because the way Anika impacted their relationship, Anika may of well have been Audrey’s ex-girlfriend.

            Audrey took a long look at Dunni. She searched Dunni’s eyes for permission, and Dunni’s demeanor did not waiver.

            “Go talk to her.” Dunni pushed Audrey towards the other side of the room where Anika was, before Audrey lost her nerve.

            Crossing the high school cafeteria again felt weird. It brought back so many memories. It brought back memories of both international night and memories of when Anika and Audrey had once stayed late after school. They had an assignment that had to be completed, but they also had to finish their Herschel notes, so they ran back to the classroom together and worked on them side by side.

            Another tear fell from Audrey’s eyes. Audrey had spent so much time these last ten years feeling as though she had just missed Anika. She felt as though she saw Anika’s ghost everywhere, but she could never reach her. She’d find herself in familiar places, and she was half convinced that Anika would walk up to her, wave at her, or hug her.

            Another tear tried to escape, but Audrey blinked them away.

            She was terrified. Every step was harder than the last. Her heart palpitated loudly. She moved slowly out of fear that she’d scare Anika and that Anika would run away again (for the third time). It had been ten years, Audrey prayed that the two of them were past at least this at this point.

            Audrey neared the group. She eyed them as she circled their perimeter. Anika was engrossed in conversation, but at the same time, Audrey could feel Anika watching her out of the corner of her eye.

            The two women’s eyes met and Audrey’s blood ran cold. They both quickly looked away, and Audrey found herself starring at the vending machine on the wall. Audrey looked at the wall for a long time, and she imagined herself leaning against it. She imagined herself just staying firmly planted there until she gained courage.

            “No.” Audrey shook her head. She refused to live her dreams/nightmares out in real life. She loved this woman. She had been without this woman for an entire decade, and she was going to get what she wanted from this woman, even if it took a long series of baby steps.

            Audrey stood up straight, hooked her fingers into her belt loops and made a beeline for the group. She positioned herself in such a way that Anika would have to walk past her in order to leave the room. Then, Audrey entered the group. She stepped around Tabitha, and she stepped closer to Anika.

            The group greeted her respectfully, but Carina and Tabitha eyed her nervously. Carina looked as if she wanted to say something, as if she wanted to play bodyguard. Audrey bit her lip. She didn’t know what to do. On the other hand, she felt that she needed to acknowledge Carina.

            Despite how little Audrey thought of Carina, she still chose to believe that Carina truly cared for Anika’s well-being. She needed Carina to know that she meant Anika no harm. She needed Carina to know that she knew the risks. She needed Carina to know that Audrey knew that in one foul sweep that she would retraumatize Anika and her both. Nonetheless, Audrey needed this desperately. She needed this like she needed to breathe. She was exhausted of living like this and could not take much more.

            Audrey looked at Carina and held her gaze for just a moment.

            “Please.” Audrey silently mouthed the words. Her eyes begged Carina.

            She knew that she wasn’t really asking Carina for permission. She needed to ask Anika, but she knew that Anika would never relax if Carina didn’t.

            Carina looked at Audrey for a long moment. She looked uneasy. Her mind seemed to be torn. Everything that happened had been so traumatizing, but the worst of it had also happened a decade ago. Audrey clearly felt guilty, and this was Audrey’s way of… Audrey was sexually interested in Anika…

            Carina paused for a second. She didn’t know any of that to be true, and as a school counselor with her Master of Education who specialized in suicide recovery and crisis management, she couldn’t assign any of those motivations to Audrey. Audrey was an 18-year-old child when she made her rash and inappropriate choices, and now Audrey was a nearly 30-year-old woman. She couldn’t ascribe the same motivations to Audrey that she once did. Frankly, she didn’t really know what Audrey wanted with Anika after all these years, but she knew it was her responsibility to listen.

            A part of Carina began to feel protective. What if she talked to Audrey first and then saw if Audrey was fit to talk to Anika? Then Carina could give Anika her recommendation. Yet, Anika was a nearly 30-year-old woman as well. She had the right to make her own choices, and if she wasn’t ready to talk to Audrey, then nothing would change that.

            Carina relaxed and nodded to Audrey, giving her approval.

            Audrey seemed to breathe a sigh of relief. She thanked Carina silently, before turning her attention to Anika.

            She paused for a long moment and they two women looked at each other out of the corners of their eyes. They both stood tense. Audrey wrung her finger together.

            “If you’re amenable to it… I don’t mean to bother you… I am sorry for bothering you…” Audrey mouthed the words to herself, and then shook her head. She didn’t want to be passive. She didn’t want to use the subjunctive or permissible language.

            This person meant everything to her, and she would not know peace until she took her shot in person. If Anika rejected her, then so be it. Yet, Anika seemed to still be able to will herself to stand in Audrey’s presence. Audrey didn’t know what she’d do if Anika left right now.

            For almost two years, Audrey had convinced herself that she hated Anika and wanted nothing to do with her, but her therapist had opened a can of worms, and reminded her that she loved Anika. All at once, Audrey realized that the feelings had never gone away. They hadn’t dimmed or subsided. They were just as strong as the day when Audrey realized that she was in love with Anika, and that made Audrey feel like shit.

            It made Audrey feel like shit, because she was in love with Dunni. Dunni was her promise, her future, her peace, her empathy, her family, her tether to the world, and her enlightened perspective all at once. Dunni was everything that Audrey could have never imagined and more. Audrey delighted in Dunni every single day from the first day the two of them started talking about sloths and koalas with chlamydia.

            Yet, Audrey was still in love with Anika, and standing here made Audrey feel like her whole heart was going to explode. Was she a bad girlfriend? Was she sinful?

            Dunni had once told Audrey that she was in love with Jessica, and the revelation left Audrey unbothered. Of course, Dunni was in love with Jessica, Jessica was Dunni’s soulmate. Audrey was convinced that the two of them were made for one another. The two of them continued to exist when they both wanted to die a long time ago, because they had each other. Yet, there was nothing romantic between them.

            So, aside from some excessive cuddling, Audrey didn’t mind that Audrey was one of two people that Dunni was madly in love with. Audrey just wished that she could give Dunni the confidence to not mind that Audrey was madly in love with both Anika and her as well.

            When Audrey thought about the complimentary way that Anika and her lives played out and continue to play out, Audrey could begin to believe for just the briefest of ways that Anika was her soulmate. If there was ever someone that God had made just for Audrey and cut from the same cloth, it was Anika.  

            Audrey knew Anika was different from the day she met her when they were both 11, despite the fact that she thought Anika was weird. In the same way, Audrey knew that Dunni was different from the day she met her, despite the fact that she thought she was weird. And Audrey loved both of them every day, she loved both of them so much that she was convinced that she loved them before she ever met them and that she had always loved them.

            “May I please speak with you tonight, Anika?” Audrey finally spoke. She ultimately used the subjunctive tense, but there was a respectful confidence in her voice. Her voice was calm, firm, but even.

            Anika’s lips parted. A part of her had wanted to scream ‘no’, and another part of her was curious. However, there was a gentle strength in her voice that made Anika feel safe. It felt so familiar, like one of Audrey’s hugs and her sweet scent. Anika felt emotional. In the past, how had Audrey always made her feel so safe and so seen?

            Audrey didn’t wait for Anika’s answer. She could almost feel everyone’s eyes on the two of them.

            “I’m going back to the other side of the cafeteria. I’m going to be leaving in the next 30 minutes. If you want to talk to me, then come find me. If you’re not ready tonight, then I’m sure you know how to figure out ways to contact me. I have never blocked you on anything at any point.” Audrey’s voice remained calm and steady.

            Anika played with the ring on the finger on her right hand. She gave Audrey a gentle nod. Audrey nodded in acknowledgement. Audrey then slid out of the group and headed back to the other side of the room.

            Audrey rejoined Dunni and Srinthi. She continued to lean against the table, but her heart palpitated out of her chest. It felt like her heart was beating a million beats a second. She felt as though she was going to be incurably ill, and she wanted to vomit. Her body shook slightly, and her girlfriend Dunni and her friend Srinthi looked at her with immense concern.

            Audrey wanted to break down and fall apart. She wanted to bawl her eyes out for days, but she had no ability to cry. She had no strength to turn her anger into violence. All she could do was feel trapped within herself. She wasn’t convinced that Anika would walk over here to talk to her.

            Tonight, would just become another slight. It would be another cut to the heart and a laceration to the flesh that Audrey would have to staple back together and sew up with sutures. At least, she’d be able to say she got the chance to stand next to Anika again. However, that might manufacture hope within Audrey, and hope made Audrey deeply miserable.

            Her hope for Anika warred against her peace and satisfaction with the beautiful life that God had already blessed her with. Who was she to want more? How dare she ask God for more?             She had two phenomenal friends of over ten years: Alyse and Srinthi. She had a beautiful girlfriend and soon to be fiancée: Dunni Choate. She had work friends and bible study friends and mentees that she poured into. She still had two amazing parents. So, why did she want more? Why did she want Anika?

            She refused to trade anything that she gained for the past. She refused to lose Alyse, Srinthi, her work and bible study friends, or her parents. However, the person who she was most terrified of losing was her baby: Dunni. Dunni: one of the most beautiful women inside and out to every walk the face of the Earth. Dunni who showed Audrey every day that she deserved love, and who refused to ever let Audrey settle.

            Who was Audrey to want both of them and pray for a reality where that would even work out? Audrey was getting so far ahead of herself. Audrey shook her head. Much of this was null and void, because there was such a high chance that Anika would refuse to talk to her altogether. Without conversation, there would continue to be no relationship of any sort.

            “Audrey…?” A voice breathed. She expected it to be Dunni or Srinthi, but it wasn’t. It was Anika. “Can we talk now?”

            Her voice was like a song.

            Audrey looked up at Anika, and a single tear fell down Audrey’s cheek. Audrey’s eyes were red with tears.

            She hadn’t heard Anika’s voice in a decade, and the sound of it meant everything to her. The sound of Anika’s voice was worth more than gold. The only one was a voice equally as magnificent was Dunni’s, which is why Audrey saved every voice recording and voicemail that Dunni had ever sent her.

            “Yes.” Audrey breathed before she remembered to ask Dunni and Srinthi for permission. Dunni, because Dunni is her girlfriend, and Srinthi, because they all rode together.

            Audrey stopped, realizing what she had done, and she looked to both of them.

            Srinthi looked tense. She had no kindness in her eyes for Anika. At times, Audrey did wonder if Srinthi disliked Anika. She was never sure, but she knew that Srinthi didn’t care for Carina.

            Dunni looked fearful. Audrey squeezed Dunni’s hand and tried to give her a reassuring smile, before she kissed her on the cheek and whispered into her ear,

            “You are always my priority.”

            At that moment, both of them relaxed. Neither of them knew what the future was going to hold, but both of them knew what the past held. Audrey chose Dunni every day. Audrey had always chosen Dunni. She had always put Dunni first, provided for and protected Dunni, and Dunni had down the same for Audrey. None of that was going to change after tonight.

            Audrey lifted Dunni’s hand to her lips, and she kissed the back of Dunni’ s hand lovingly, before Audrey stood up and pushed away from the table.

            Audrey then followed Anika through the cafeteria and into the West Wing. The two of them walked until they made it to Mrs. Marx’s former classroom, and both sat down at the table in the third row on the right side of the classroom.

            Audrey scratched at the tabletop. This room held so many memories, and it appeared to be relatively unchanged. Years ago, Audrey used to always wonder when she had fallen in love with Anika, when did their friendship become something significantly more to her? As she looked at the gray tabletop, she knew it was here.

            Well, not here per say. The room had been ordered in reverse alphabetical order. Audrey, last name, Alexander had sat in the back with Steph Bradely, who she deeply detested, and Anika sat in the front with people like Huda, Arshia (and maybe even Victoria).

            At night, when Mrs. Marx would assign essays and writing assignments, Anika and Audrey would read over each other’s work. Some nights when Mr. Herschel would assign Herschel notes, Anika and Audrey would text and call each other to keep each other company. Audrey wasn’t even supposed to be in this class. She wasn’t placed in this class at the beginning of the year. She was actually placed in honors US History and honors American Literature, but she begged and she prayed to be in APUSH.

 Even then, she still wasn’t supposed to be in this class. She had been placed in the opposite block with Carina first. However, the problem was that Anastashia Jebraili was in that block, and at that point in Audrey’s young life, Anna was the greatest evil that Audrey had ever known. In middle school Anna (who once was a friend), harassed Audrey to no end. Sometimes, Audrey wondered if Anika viewed her in the same light. Nonetheless, Audrey asked Mrs. Marx to place her in the opposite class. That’s how Audrey ended up in the same block as Anika.

            If it wasn’t for that, the two of them would have never been friends the way that they were when high school began to draw to a close. Now that Audrey was sitting here connecting the dots, a part of her wished that she had never asked to switch from honors US History to APUSH. Then she and Anika would never have become close friends, then she would have never fallen in love with Anika, and she never would have experienced the pain and heartbreak she had felt over the last ten years. Then she could actually love Dunni without hesitation or restraint.

            Audrey felt herself becoming emotional again. Her eyes grew wet. She wanted to cry, but she didn’t know how to. There was only one time in Audrey’s entire life that she had been able to cry for herself, and that time she was crying because of Anika.

            “Audrey…?” Anika breathed again as she saw how wet Audrey’s eyes were. She moved her hand closer to Audrey’s, but the two women didn’t touch. Audrey noticed and wondered what Anika’s skin felt like. What would it feel like to hold Anika’s petite hand again.

            Audrey still remembered the way Anika’s hugs felt. It was funny. When Audrey hugged Dunni, Dunni filled her arms completely. It felt as if Dunni had been created just to stand in Audrey’s arms, and as though Audrey’s arms had been created just to hold Dunni. However, when Audrey hugged Anika, she realized just how small Anika really was. She used to wear loose fitting clothing, so she was much smaller than she appeared, and she already appeared small.

            Whenever Anika hugged Audrey, it was always the same. Audrey would wrap her arms around Anika’s waist, and Anika would drape her arms over Audrey’s shoulders and encircle Audrey’s neck. Towards the end of their friendship, their hugs had begun to last a little bit longer than they should have, but it wasn’t because Audrey hadn’t been the one to let go.

            Now, when Audrey hugged Dunni, she made sure that she was always the last one to let go. She always ensured that the hug lasted a little bit too long, even if Dunni protested.

            The memory of Anika in Audrey’s arms made Audrey’s heart skip a beat, and she almost stood up and ran out of the room. What the hell was she doing? She needed to forget about Anika! She wanted to believe that she could stop herself from having romantic feelings for Anika, but she wasn’t entirely sure, and that terrified her. It mortified her, because she genuinely did want to give Dunni everything, and she wanted so much for Dunni to have all of her.

            Audrey sat up straight. Her shoulders tensed and she exhaled, allowing her mind to clear.

            “What did you want to talk to me about?” Anika asked, allowing Audrey to go first, once Audrey’s mind looked more settled.

            “I…” Audrey paused for a long moment. She didn’t know what she wanted to talk to Anika about. There’s was so much that Audrey wanted to tell Anika, but at the same time, she didn’t want to tell er anything at all. They’d need a year of phone calls every day just to catch up, because Audrey wanted to tell Anika everything and she wanted to know everything about Anika. The two of them had missed a whole decade of each other’s lives.

            However, despite all that, that’s not what this talk was about, because Anika and Audrey still were not friends. There was a strong chance that the two of them would never be friends ever again. So, all the things that Audrey wanted to tell Anika really didn’t matter.

            Audrey just needed to make sure that she said her peace with this once in a lifetime opportunity. That was all she could do, and all that she could ask for. She had no idea how much time she had with Anika before Dunni and Srinthi came to get her, before Anika decided to leave, or before the ten-year reunion was over altogether.

            Audrey closed her eyes. She felt crazy for what she was about to say next, but she had to say it. She might never get another chance to say it again, and she had never said it before.

            “Thank you for being willing to speak with me Anika Sharma. Before I start, because I don’t know how much time we have. I want to start by saying this: Anika Sharma, I love you. I have always loved you to the point that I do not know exactly when my love for you began. Ten years later, and my love for you has still not diminished even one ounce. In high school, I do not believe that I was you best friend, but by the time senior year rolled around, you were my best friend. I don’t say this, because I have any romantic desires of fantasies or because I am holding onto the past. I have a beautiful relationship with one of the most amazing women I’ve ever met, and I want to spend forever with. I say this, because I never got the chance to say it before, and I wish that I had. I wish I had said it 10 years ago.”

            Anika sat still for a long moment. She watched Audrey and then she spoke.

            “You did say it ten years ago, when you were sitting in the alcove outside of Dr. Howard’s room after school in our free period.”

            Audrey was almost surprised that Anika remembered, but it didn’t matter, because Audrey remembered it clearly too.

            “No. It doesn’t count. I said it with hesitancy and apprehension. I didn’t even look you in the eye when I said it, and I strung it into another sentence about something else. I didn’t give it the justice that it deserved, so I want to say it again now.”

            “I love you, Anika Sharma. You have always been very special to me.”

            “How do you know that you still love me? You haven’t seen me in 10 years. How do you know that you don’t love the idea of me? How do you know that it is not like the… obsession you had on Arshia?”

            “I definitely have ideas about you, but I don’t even remember what those ideas are anymore. What I do know, is that I truly believe that people at their core stay the same, so… In many ways, I know that you are probably completely different than the 16, 17, 18-year-old Anika that I fell in love with. Yet, I know in a myriad of other ways, that you are exactly the same, because she is you and you are her.”

            “I… umm…” Anika didn’t quite know what to say. She felt like she was fighting herself. She wanted to jump out of her skin and feel creeped out that after ten years Audrey said that she still loved her, but Anika didn’t feel creeped out. There was nothing crazed or perverted about what Audrey said. She looked into Audrey’s eyes and knew that Audrey meant every single word, and she had declared it as calmly as she had declared it definitively. “Well… I apologize, but I can’t say that I feel the same way. You…” Anika started to say and then she stopped.

            A pang of pain flashed through Audrey’s eyes, but her face remained unsurprised. It was clear that Audrey had never told Anika she loved her expecting Anika to say it in return. She simply wanted Anika to know that she was loved and thought of.

            “I wanted to say one more thing in person while I have the chance.” Audrey spoke. “I feel that it’s only right to say it in person, even though I know that I’ve said it in letters and emails far too many times.”

            Audrey paused for a long moment. She found Anika’s eyes again, and the two held each other’s gaze.

            “Anika, I am so sorry. I am so embarrassed and ashamed of what I did. I don’t sit here today to ask you for your forgiveness. I don’t have the right to ask you for it. I know the pain that I felt and how that motivated me to behave the way that I did. I give myself that grace, but it does not excuse my actions.

            I am sorry for how I treated you towards the end of high school. I apologize for how I disregarded and trampled over your feelings. I apologize for how I attacked your friend Carina with my words. I, also, apologize for not respecting your boundaries and for violating your consent multiple times in the years following high school, after you told me via email that I should move on and that you did not wish to speak to me.

            I did not have the tools I needed to process and regulate my emotions at the time, and I should have put my effort time and attention into getting those tools and fully utilizing them, instead of making you the target of my unprocessed emotions.”

            Anika blinked in surprise. Her eyes widened almost in disbelief.

            Audrey wasn’t a kid anymore. She wasn’t 18 anymore, but she was still Audrey. She was so mature and introspective. She was well-spoken and matter of fact. Her confidence, despite her strong emotions, placed Anika at ease as it used to when they were kids.

            Anika had played Audrey up to be the monster in her head for decades, and there was nothing there. She didn’t yet know if she wanted to speak to Audrey again after this, but she did know that there was nothing there. Audrey wasn’t intimidating. She was gentle, and she was just as terrified as Anika. She restrained herself physically, mentally and emotionally throughout the entire conversation. She yielded to Anika and checked in on her. She took accountability, and she did not shift blame, nor did she overshare.

            She was honest, transparent, and vulnerable.

            She was 18 year old Anika’s best friend, who Anika had met when she was 11 and lost when she was 19.

            “Anika…?” Audrey asked.

            Anika looked at Audrey only to see that Audrey was watching her with concern. She looked back at Audrey in surprise, and Audrey stood up and walked to the front of the room.

            Audrey grabbed something off the teacher’s desk and sat back down and placed it in front of Anika. It was a box of tissues.

            “Oh…” Anika touched her cheeks lightly to find that they were damp. She hadn’t realized that she had started crying. She wiped her tears away, but more tears flowed down her cheeks.

            Audrey pulled a tissue from the box, and she gently placed it next to Anika’s right hand that was resting on the desk. Anika picked up the tissue and wiped her eyes before blowing her nose, but more tears fell.

            This was all too much to handle. Anika wanted to jump out of her skin and run out of the room. She felt nauseous and her heart ached. All these years, Anika told herself that it didn’t matter how she treated Audrey, how she rejected Audrey, because Audrey was a vindictive and manipulative person who was only capable of cruelty and didn’t know love, but that wasn’t true.

            Audrey was capable of immense love. She just didn’t always understand her emotions. She had phenomenal self-awareness and accountability, and she catered to Anika. She had always catered to Anika. Every time she had waited for Anika outside of class, she had catered to Anika. Every time she had helped Anika with an essay (whether it was for Marx or college), she had catered to Anika. Evey time, she bought Anika the perfect gift or took Anika home after school, she had catered to Anika. Every time Audrey did Anika a favor that Anika knew no one else would do for her and Audrey went the extra mile, she had catered to Anika. And here she was, nearly 30 years old, and she was still catering to Anika, because that’s who she was. That’s who she is.

            Anika felt horrible. She shook her head.

            She had told herself for the last ten years that she didn’t need Audrey, and maybe that was true. Anika had a numerous amount of friends, but a part of her did want the friend that Audrey had once been to her.

            “I… umm…” Anika didn’t know what to say.

            Audrey rolled her lips in, looked down at her phone, and frowned as if she were remembering something when she looked at the time. Anika and Audrey knew what it both meant. Audrey had to go, but she didn’t want to.

            Audrey stood up to her feet, and she looked down on Anika. She stood silent for a long moment.

            “I just want to say a few things, before I leave… and I apologize if I spoke so much that I did not give you adequate time to speak. That was not my intention, and I should have been more considerate of you and more aware of the time myself.”             “The first thing I want to say is… and this might sound weird, but… I forgive you. I don’t think you can begin to know how much you walking away from me, and refusing to talk to me when we were in the same space hurt me. I don’t think you have any idea how traumatic that was for me and my mental health. However, I understand why you did it. You have the right to self-preservation and to protect yourself. You owe no one an explanation or justification for that, so for that I forgive you.

            The second thing that I want to say is that… I know we didn’t have a lot of time to speak today. I feel like there’s still a lot of healing that we need to do separately, and there’s a lot of healing we need to do together (if that’s something you’re ever interested in), so here’s my number…” Audrey slide Anika the number on a small piece of notebook paper she tore off. “It’s the same as it was in high school, so you can call me anytime, and we can meet up for coffee. Of course, I don’t drink coffee, so for me it would be hot chocolate, but I digress.”

            Audrey rambled a little and Anika found herself smiling to herself ever so slightly. Audrey had the same mannerisms that she always had. She still did the little over share, the digression, and she still had the sly playful smirk. Her large, dark Alexander eyes still sparkled when they caught the light when Audrey talked about something she really liked, and Audrey still titled her head up to the ceiling when she was talking through her thoughts. Audrey didn’t think that Anika noticed all these things about Audrey, but that was the thing, Anika had always noticed everything about Audrey.

            Anika could pick Audrey out from a crowd, she’d know Audrey’s voice anywhere, she could pull out Audrey’s handwritten letter from a mountain of handwritten letters, she could know if she was texting Audrey without Audrey ever identifying herself. She knew what Audrey would wear and what Audrey wouldn’t wear. She knew this woman to the core. She knew this woman to the misplaced, curly hair. She knew Audrey this well, because she had once loved Audrey more than almost anyone. There was a point that if she had lost all of her friends after high school except for Carina and Audrey, then she would have been alright. So, why had Anika become so cynical and spiteful towards Audrey over the last decade? It’s because Audrey had broken her heart. Audrey had broken Anika’s heart so irrevocably, and Audrey was one of the few people that Anika had ever given enough power to in order to do just that.

            “Oh, and the last thing, I want to say before I leave… Maybe, I’m weird to say it, but I want to leave everything on the table. I don’t want to regret anything. If I had one wish in the entire world. If someone asked me what I really true want, there’s only one thing that comes to mind (granted that I don’t lose all the love in relationships that I have gained). I want you. I want you as my friend again. I know that’s a big ask, but there’s not a single day that’s gone by that I haven’t missed your friendship.”

            With that Audrey gave Anika a small smile and a nod. Audrey seemed to wait for a long moment to see if Anika would say something.

            For a second Anika didn’t have the words, until she finally found something to say.

            “You should get back to your friends.” Anika dismissed Audrey.

            Pain shot through Audrey’s heart, but she resisted wincing. That was Audrey’s answer. For the last ten years, Audrey had given trying to heal and remedy her relationship with Anika everything she had, and that was Anika’s answer. There was literally nothing else left to be done. It was over, but at least Audrey could have peace tonight knowing that she had been brave: she had confronted Anika and told her exactly how she felt. It wasn’t enough for Anika, but it would come to be more than enough for Audrey.

            “Goodbye Anika Sharma. I hope that your life is as beautiful and amazing as you are.” Audrey politely spoke her salutation and left.

            Anika sat there for a long time by herself before Carina and Tabitha came to collect her. 10 years ago, Audrey had broken Anika’s heart, but now Anika finally realized that she had broken Audrey’s heart as well.

Epilogue:

Audrey stood next to Dunni’s side and smiled happily. She kissed her wife’s temple and asked her if she wanted a drink.  

            “Oooo see if they have some sweat green tea!” Dunni smiled from ear to ear. “I’ve been good this week, so I can have some. I haven’t had much sugar.” Dunni said referring to her chronic sugar induced headaches.

            “Knowing the host of this party, they absolutely have sweet green tea and or peach tea.” Audrey beamed at her wife. “I’ll be right back.” Audrey promised before she leaned forward and gave her wife a quick peck on the lips.

            A small blush spread across Dunni’s golden Alexander cheeks. She hadn’t always liked PDA, but she loved knowing that Audrey loved to love her outload. She loved knowing that she truly was and always Audrey’s number one priority.

            She knew that she had been married to Audrey for almost eight years from now, but the appeal of it all never wore off, and Dunni never took it for granted. Dunni got her happy ending, she found her Princess Charming, and Audrey was more than glad to give it all to her.

            Audrey walked across the kitchen towards the beverage table. Out of the corner of her eye, she saw Dunni make her way over a group of other spouses and begin to crack jokes with them. Audrey smiled; her wife’s laugh was contagious.

            “Hi Mommy!!” Two small voices chimed in unison and called up to her as she walked past them. Audrey looked down to see Dunni’s and her two daughters: Ryon and Zashia sitting on the floor and playing with their friend Hira, who was the daughter of the host.

            “Hira, Ryon and I are all drawing pictures of Financimal’s characters together. When we get home, can we use your XP Pen monitor, so we could upload our pictures to the Financimal’s Instagram account?” Zashia asked with beautiful bright eyes and a round, chocolate face.

            “You can...” Audrey smiled, “But remember not to work too hard and have some fun,” Audrey warned her daughters.

            “Working hard on your side hustle is fun!” Hira and Ryon exclaimed at the same time.

            Audrey chuckled nervously and walked away. She hoped that the girls hadn’t learned that from her. If they had, Dunni was going to kill her later.

            Audrey continued to the beverage table, when she was stopped by the host. The host grabbed her arm gently, and she led her into the home office where she shut the door behind them.

            “Hey… I’m sorry for pulling you away.” She apologized. “I know that you were headed to get a drink for Dunni, but I wanted to show you something real quick!” She looked so excited as though she were going to begin to bounce up and down.

            “Yeah, no problem, what is it that you want to show me Sharma?” Audrey asked warmly, while she grinned at Anika slyly. Audrey didn’t always call Anika by her maiden name, but when she did, it meant something special between the two of them.

            “Turn around.” Anika instructed Audrey softly.

            Audrey turned around to see a large frame on the wall, framing a document with Anika’s signature on it: Anika Sharma, MSPH as well as the signature of the House Speaker and the Senate Leader.

            “I wanted you to be the first person to see that I framed the bill. Without all of your help, I would have never successfully proposed my first health policy bill to be passed by both houses of congress.” Anika thanked Audrey.

            Audrey turned to face Anika. Anika looked emotional and tears began to run down Anika’s cheeks.

            “It looks amazing! I’m sure you could have done it without me.” Audrey smiled at Anika humbly.

            “No…” Anika shook her head. “I couldn’t have. In fact, I want to show you something.”

            Anika stepped towards the bill, and she pointed up to a single line.

            “The validity of the data and actuarial assumptions contained in this bill verified by Audrey Natalia Blake-Choate, FSA, MAAA.”

            Now, Audrey found tears running down her own cheeks. This moment almost felt like too much. There were times when Audrey had begun to believe that neither of these things would be possible. She began to believe that Anika and she would never be friends again, and she began to believe that she’d never be an FSA. Yet now, Anika and Audrey were friends again and their names were on the same bill, and Audrey was an FSA. She was an FSA that had her work validated by congress.

            Audrey chuckled a light chuckle and a few more tears rolled down her cheeks.

            “Thank you, Anika.” Audrey whispered.

            “No, thank you.” Anika whispered to Audrey in return, and before Audrey knew it, Anika had pulled Audrey into her arms. Anika had slightly more weight on her than she did twenty years ago, but she still didn’t fill all the space in Audrey’s arms. She was still tiny. She still draped her arms over Audrey’s shoulders and encircled her arms around Audrey’s neck. Audrey still instinctively wrapped her arms around Anika’s waist. After 20 years, the two women still didn’t skip a beat, when it came to holding one another.

            “Thank you so much for being my friend even when I wasn’t a friend to you.” Anika whispered into Audrey’s ear so quietly that no one else would have heard her even if someone else was in the room. “I’ll never be able to say it enough, but I love you Audrey Natalia Blake.”

            “Thank you, Anika. I always knew that you were worth the wait.” Audrey squeezed Anika even tighter. “I know that I will never stop saying it, so get ready to get sick of it. I love you, Anika Sharma.”

End.

#original story #short novel #love story #friendship #to love #for your entertainment #high school #angst #gay girl #lgbt #dream #hope #reunion #healing #reconciliation #love #understanding

[betustamorla]

The Sun & the Lion

Cor had been fighting since he was strong enough to hold a sword, all his life had taken a clear purpose since he met that young prince more than twenty-five years ago. His life, his death, it all belongs to the Kingdom of Lucis and serving the Caelum family… His life had been a constant of fighting in the war against Niflheim, so much that he had never had time to think beyond surviving and protecting, nor what his life could be beyond that. And perhaps that’s why a young princess had started to affect him so much. Because she wanted him to see more than a lifetime in battle, and she wanted to be with him through it.

So now it was his fault that she was again hurt by his rejection. He had let his guard down and had let her hope he might finally reciprocate her feelings grow. So they had fought the night prior, and this time he just couldn't put it out of his mind for the rest of the night.

They had been walking back from the King’s study after one last follow-up of the Verstael incident under Insomnia. It was coincidental they were taking the same way, as both of them were planning to go back to their respective offices to leave or read more reports and Cor just hoped it would pass without any exchange because nowadays he was starting to get troubled over what her words might cause on him or the other way around. But as it was, the Princess was as troublesome as usual, and as they were about to part ways the Princess had stopped him.

“Did you have dinner?” She asked.

Cor shook his head, he wasn’t even planning to eat anything one way or the other as he’d had a late lunch.

Still, she tentatively asked him to go get something to eat with her. The expectation in her eyes almost made him agree, but he caught himself and reprimanded his carelessness, remembering the girl had feelings for him—

“I’ll pass, Princess.” He said and turned to leave.

An exasperated sigh behind him told Cor this wasn’t over. Following footsteps and a hand on his arm stopped him again.

“You should take care, Marshal. Not long ago you were in a hospital bed, even if you don’t feel like eating, you still should. At least something light.” 

Her soft tone made him look straight into her eyes, which were filled with concern and care. Cor didn’t say anything until, as always, she couldn’t stand his gaze and looked away, then released his arm. He wasn’t sure what she saw in his eyes as she could never hold his gaze for too long, even if she could for the likes of enemies or foreign governance.

“Don’t worry about me, Princess. Take care of your own health.” And maybe it came a bit too cold, too harsh. Because Aelia pursed her lips downwards and she seemed to become smaller, but as soon as it came it was gone. She smiled, an honest smile if a bit pained.

“I can’t help but worry about you. You know that I l—”

He stopped her before she could finish it, “And you know that I think it’s a waste of your time. You’re just hurting yourself.”

Maybe there was a better way to say this, but he had never been good with words or coating things up, life was too short to waste in useless cajolery. Something the Princess had become very good at. And yet, the look of hurt in her eyes was as sharp as when she had half of her arm charred and burned.

"Stop! Stop saying loving you is bad for me! For it is not," Aelia's eyes fired up, "How could it be wrong, or bad to love someone who loves our people, who put his life on the line to protect the innocent, who has fought all his life to fight for those who cannot fight? How could it be bad for me, to want to give happiness, to give my life to someone like that?"

Cor clenched his teeth, damn the stubborn girl! And more damned his heart that quickened at those words.

"I've been fighting for and serving your father since before you were born, surely you must see what's wrong there." Cor managed to say callously, but his mind and feelings were very messy. 

"To hell with that! I don't care about it!" Aelia snapped back at him.

"But I do. And even if I didn't, it still wouldn't change anything. I'm a soldier, Princess, I am the kind of man who has taken away countless lives, the one who participates in the one thing you hate above all. And I'm most likely to end up dying at any moment in service of the King." He answered dryly, this much she ought to understand.

Cor saw her countenance grow more flustered and her eyes narrowed angrily, "At least just say you simply don't love me. You don't need to feel guilty for not returning my stupid feelings!" Aelia then paused and took a sharp breath. Her anger dissipated, then turned her eyes to the side, she couldn't bear to look at him any longer. "It was my mistake talking about this again… just forget it." She finished and turned away.

#ff15 #ffxv fanfic #ffxv #cor leonis #cor leonis x ofc #ffxv noctis #noctis lucis caelum #regis lucis caelum #older man younger woman #unrequited love #drama #short novel #final fantasy xv #final fantasy 15

[scifimagpie]

Just got my copy of Query!

If you're a writer, publisher, or a curious reader, I definitely recommend this.

With elements of ecological activism, queer drama, and metafiction, this is a short but delightful read that perfectly encapsulates the despair of hte modern oment - while also offering humour and hope.

It's a little bit similar to Martha Grimes' Foul Matter or Happiness(tm) by Will Ferguson, so if you liked those, check this out.

#book #writeblr #book rec #short novel #indie #independent #ecofiction #metafiction #postmodern #epistolary novel #query #publishing #industry

[luenia-bouquet]

Una psicóloga loca que sueña ser científica (short novel)

Descripción: Rinka Sasaki, una respetada psicóloga de 40 años, es profesora universitaria con un puesto prestigioso, pero ha estado albergando un loco deseo de realizar meticulosos experimentos de lavado de cerebro en humanos.

Un día se le ocurre que, si acoge a un niño bajo la apariencia de "adopción", podrá llevar a cabo experimentos de este tipo a diario, y así, acoge a Mikoto, un niño cuya autoestima ha sido destruida por los graves abusos de sus padres.

Sin embargo, Mikoto crece de forma distinta a lo que Rinka tenía en mente…

Disfrute de esta historia ficticia, aunque hay algunas diferencias con la realidad, como la psicología, las clasificaciones científicas y el sistema hospitalario.

El autor es un psicólogo aficionado, así que por favor absténgase de señalar los detalles de su área de especialización.

Si se siente mal después de leer esto, hágalo bajo su propia responsabilidad.

Capítulo 1: La melancolía de la psicóloga loca

—¡Oh, qué maravilla! ¡Qué hipótesis tan novedosa y qué examen tan meticuloso! Y qué interesante es esta observación... ¡Eres verdaderamente la Juana de Arco de la Sociedad Psicológica! ¡No hay otra mujer tan maravillosa como tú!

Es una lluvia de elogios.

—¡Profesora Sasaki! ¡La Asociación Americana de Psicología se ha puesto en contacto con nosotros para honrarla con un prestigioso premio! ¿Cuántos premios ha recibido ya por sus trabajos? De hecho, ¡es usted la profesora más joven de esta universidad!

Acumulación, fama.

—¡Sois el orgullo de nuestra universidad!

…Ah,

¿Y qué importancia tiene?

—¿Sabes? La Bruja Negra va a ganar otro premio de psicología. ¿Se habrá acostado con algún pez gordo estadounidense?

La mirada de preocupación en su rostro al mirar a su amigo, mientras mira de arriba abajo, confirma los signos de inquietud.

A pesar del lenguaje burlón, es evidente que no confía en sus propias opiniones.

—Qué idiota. Incluso el más enamoradizo de los hombres no querría acostarse con una mujer tan vieja que es toda piel y huesos y sin pretensiones de ser linda. Tiene más de 40 años, al menos debería aprender a ser sociable, pero no importa cuántos cumplidos reciba, ni siquiera sonríe, ¿sabes? Y lo que faltaba. ¿A qué viene tanta ropa negra últimamente? Es tan deprimente verla, aunque sean tan lúgubres. Es una bruja. ¿Qué pasa con la Juana de Arco de la Sociedad Psicológica?

En comparación, los alumnos muestran aquí claros atisbos de antipatía, como el labio superior levantado y la nariz arrugada.

Por otro lado, la tirantez de los párpados inferiores y las arrugas de línea ondulada en el centro de la frente son signos de miedo.

Si este miedo se debe al efecto cromático de la ropa "negra" que he estado usando durante un mes seguido, o algún otro factor, es imposible de determinar en este momento.

Examinaré un experimento comparativo para ver si su miedo disminuye cuando uno se viste durante el mismo periodo con colores como el "naranja" y el "verde", que tienen un efecto contrarrestaste sobre la ansiedad.

Veré los progresos.

—Realmente me pregunto por qué elegí el laboratorio de esa mujer.

—Soy una persona muy prestigiosa. La fama es lo mejor de nuestra universidad… en el mejor de los casos, aguantemos la incomodidad por ahora y usemos el nombre de esa tipa.

“Hm. Puedo analizarlo, pero no lo entiendo. La psicología de esta gente es...”

Dejé escapar un suspiro mientras miraba las grabaciones de las cámaras de vigilancia colocadas en secreto en las instalaciones.

Los sentimientos hacia mí que puedo ver en los dos estudiantes del vídeo son 'antipatía' y 'miedo', así como 'complejo de inferioridad' y 'celos' que no puedo ocultar.

Y la 'hostilidad' que surge de estos sentimientos.

Aunque hay una clara diferencia de posición entre un profesor y un estudiante de posgrado, como personas que comparten las mismas aspiraciones por la psicología, no puedo evitar sentirme amargada por el hecho de que soy la única que recibe elogios.

Más aún porque son estudiantes de doctorado que sueñan con ser profesores universitarios en el futuro.

Pero sigo sin comprenderlo.

“¿Por qué les preocupa tanto los elogios y el prestigio cuando son aspirantes a psicólogos como yo? ¿Qué más buscan en el mundo académico aparte de la búsqueda de la curiosidad intelectual?”

Entiendo que los humanos tienen un ineludible deseo de aprobación.

Sin embargo, no entiendo este deseo como una sensación física.

Formular una hipótesis.

Poner a prueba la hipótesis en un experimento.

Analizar los resultados y formular una nueva hipótesis.

Para mí, no hay mayor alegría que esta.

Sí, lo sé.

Lo sé, soy una anomalía.

Realmente no entiendo los sentimientos que tienen otras personas. Definitivamente algo importante como ser humano debió faltar cuando nací del vientre de mi madre.

Es por eso que soy igualmente impasible ante los elogios y abusos de los demás. No encuentro valor en las valoraciones de los demás.

Lo investigué porque no lo entendía.

Psicología humana. Emociones humanas.

La gente dice que mi hipótesis es novedosa. Yo digo que no es sorprendente.

Sólo porque carezco de ella soy capaz de analizar a las personas objetivamente, sin sentimientos subjetivos.

Es una perspectiva que las personas con una sensibilidad normal seguramente no entenderían.

“¡Ah! Quiero hipotetizar (¡quiero saber!), experimentar (¡quiero saber!), analizar (¡quiero saber!)”.

Como impulsada por las emociones que afloran en mi corazón, rebusco en la caja fuerte que he instalado secretamente en el laboratorio.

Acomodo cuidadosamente cada uno de los documentos que hay allí para no dañarlos y, mientras los miro como de costumbre, suelto un suspiro.

“¿Por qué? ¿por qué? ¿Por qué no viví en esta era?”

Los materiales alineados en el escritorio son todos libros prohibidos que han sido borrados del escenario público.

Fueron recogidos en el mercado negro clandestino tras viajar por todo el mundo.

¡En la locura de la guerra, incluso habría sido legal realizar experimentos inhumanos en humanos…!

Me lamenté ante los documentos de los numerosos experimentos de lavado de cerebro realizados entre bastidores durante las guerras mundiales.

Un soldado de absoluta obediencia que recorre el campo de batalla sin miedo a su propia muerte.

Un guerrero frenético que seguirá luchando hasta que haya destruido al enemigo, aunque le arranquen los brazos y piernas o muera.

Para los mandos superiores, son los peones más útiles, desechables y convenientes de usar.

En tiempos de guerra, son la fuerza de combate más deseable.

Sin embargo, nadie tiene tales cualidades para empezar.

Alguien tiene que crearlos deliberadamente y producirlos en masa.

Cada país involucrado en la guerra llevó a cabo experimentos de lavado de cerebro en secreto para convertir a soldados ordinarios en seres extraordinarios.

Escritos en varios idiomas, los traduje al japonés y los leí una y otra vez.

Luego, los combiné con mis conocimientos de psicología y llegué a una hipótesis que me pareció la más útil en el lavado de cerebro.

“Ah, quiero comprobarlo”

-----------------------------

Capítulo 2 en proceso de ser traducido.

La aparición del yandere se verá más adentante, será un proceso interesante.

#yandere #yandere boy #short story #short novel #chico yandere

[i-hitmypeak-atseven]

Finally finished Giovanni’s room !! Its actually a short book but it took kinda long time for me to finish it because of my university’s thight schedule. It is by far THE most beautifully written book that i’ve read and i can now say that this is my favorite book of all time. It is painfully realistic and beautifully surreal. I couldn’t imagine a more suiting ending. James baldwin is truly a genius <3

#giovanni’s room #james baldwin #bookblr #books and reading #libary #school #winter reading #short novel #modern classics #penguin books #lgbtq community #lqbtqia #reading #bookworm #bookworld #study aesthetic #book aesthetic #winter aesthetic #soft aesthetic #aesthetic

[planet3045]

Whispers of the Heart

In a quaint town where dreams and friendships bloomed, lived two teenagers named Anna and Smith. They attended the same school, their paths often crossing like two stars in the same night sky.

Anna, with her lively eyes and infectious laughter, had always admired Smith's artistic talents and his sincere smile. Smith, in turn, was captivated by Anna's grace, her kindness radiating like sunlight through the clouds.

As months went by, their glances turned into lingering smiles and fleeting touches. Anna felt her heart flutter whenever Smith's name was mentioned, and he found himself stealing glances at her during class.

One afternoon, as the sun painted the sky in shades of orange, Anna gathered her courage and confessed her feelings to Smith. Her words stumbled out, revealing the admiration she had been harboring. To her surprise, Smith blushed and admitted that he too had been drawn to her.

From that moment, their journey began. They explored parks, shared secrets, and stole moments under the stars. Their bond grew stronger, their hearts intertwined like vines in a garden.

However, secrets have a way of escaping, and Anna's twin sister, Bella, accidentally uncovered their romance. Bella, with her mischievous smile and keen intuition, couldn't keep this discovery to herself. She confided in their mother, setting off a storm of emotions.

Their mother, taken aback by the revelation, confronted Anna. Bella's well-intentioned actions had brought turmoil to Anna's newfound happiness. Feeling betrayed by her own sister, Anna faced her mother's disappointment with a heavy heart.

Bella, guilt-ridden, continued to report on Anna and Smith's every interaction. The atmosphere at home grew tense, and Anna and Smith found themselves walking on eggshells, their once carefree moments now shadowed by scrutiny.

The pressure of hiding their relationship became too much to bear. The stolen glances and whispered words lost their charm. Anna and Smith realized that their love deserved to thrive without constraints. They decided to confront the situation head-on.

In a secluded spot, they discussed their feelings openly. Tears mingled with laughter as they acknowledged the hurdles they had faced. With heavy hearts, they made the painful decision to part ways.

As time passed, wounds healed, and Anna and Smith found solace in friendship. Bella, remorseful for her role in their separation, learned the importance of respecting the emotions of others.

"Whispers of the Heart" became a story of blossoming love, shattered illusions, and the strength to overcome challenges. While Anna and Smith's paths diverged, they would forever treasure the moments when their hearts whispered the sweet melody of young love.

#teen romance #fluff #sibling rivalry #loyalty #loyal friends #crushes #first love #teen relationship #friendship dynamics #school life #twins #short novel #webnovel

[disgruntledpelicansstuff]

The strangest thing about jealousy is that it can populate an entire city—the whole world—with a person you may never have met.

From The possession - Annie ernaux

#the possession #annie ernaux #jealousy #jealousy is a disease #jealousy issues #quotes i like #quotes i love #book quotes #translated literature #quoteoftheday #relatable quotes #felt it #booksarelife #short novel #book readers #readers #quotes

[hunwes]

Milk time 🍼🤱

You and your alien girlfriend want to have a baby. After several attempts, conceiving didn't happened so far. But your alien's boobs started to produce breastmilk. As your GF expected: your genes and semen aren't compatible with hers yet. Therefore her body reacted with FPS (fake pregnancy syndrome) when you came inside her pussy several times.

Now you're on a strict breastmilk diet. You're not allowed to eat or drink anything else than her tasty nectar. There are 8 seances each day to speed up your purification and adjustment to be eligible to breed her.

Till you can't get her pregnant, you'll be her little hungry baby boy from Earth. But that's fine for you, as her boobs are the best for you in POV. You love being a baby anyway.

#lactating kink #lactation #lactating breasts #lactating women #lactating girl #lactacting #sexy breast #breastfeeding alien #breastfeeding kink #adult breastfeeding relationship #breast milk #trying to conceive #alien girl #alien lover #getting pregnant #mommy milkers #breastmilk #cw.breastfeeding + lactating #short novel #fan fiction #fanfic

[inevitablycharmed]

My story will be over soon. But it's not something to be sad about. As we count up the memories from one journey, we head off to another. Remembering those who went ahead. Remembering those who will follow after. And someday, we will meet all those people again, out the horizon.

#spilled thoughts #spilled words #books and libraries #literature #double metaphor #dark quotes #japanese literature #the travelling cat chronicles #cats #favorite quotes #sad thoughts #books #short novel #deep thoughts

[while-my-guitar-gently-sleeps]

On Earth We Are Briefly Gorgeous by Ocean Vuong

#ocean vuong #english literature #poetic #a tale of life #hardships #quotes #5 star reads #short novel #new post #like for follow #like for like #books #recent reads #photograpgy by me #edited by #edited by me #leave a comment #have you read it #aesthetic sky #book quotes #pigeons #birds #fly #clicked by me #loved it #cried a bit #ngl

[snt315]

だいぶ前に書いたやつ。Vが生きてた設定でどうにかしてふたりを再会させたかった。

#v for vendetta #fanfic #short novel

[lexxwithbooks]

📖: 𝑻𝒐𝒓𝒏 𝑯𝒆𝒂𝒓𝒕𝒔 (𝐻𝑒𝑎𝑟𝑡𝑠 #1.5) 📷🌊❤️‍🩹

✍🏽: 𝐂𝐥𝐚𝐢𝐫𝐞 𝐂𝐨𝐧𝐭𝐫𝐞𝐫𝐚𝐬

#torn hearts #hearts series #claire contreras #jensen reynolds #mia bennett #jensen x mia #mia x jensen #puppylove #friends to lovers #friends to strangers #angsty romance #short novel #second chance romance #novella #dual pov #first love #childhood friends #steamy #smutty books #new books #books recommendations #books #books recs #tbr #libros #libros recomendados #book tumblr #frase libro #booklover #book couples