#STOP that’s not funny fuck you asshole

[essektheylyss]

Honestly, it is so funny remembering that Annabeth Chase's literal, stated, canonical fatal flaw is hubris.

Rick Riordan was like, "This clever, neurodivergent preteen girl believes that she is smarter than the gods, and she will get the chance to prove herself right," and he was correct. 😌

#pjo #honestly annabeth best character cuz in the end the gods straight up are like 'you're right. here's your dream come true' #like never once did mr. riordan say 'and she should stop being like that.' #honestly in general mega props to pjo for framing fatal flaws as a source of strength consistently #both percy and annabeth in the end get to be So Valid in their fatal flaws lmao #like it's so funny that in the end percy straight up is like 'I don't know shit but you all need to shut up and listen to annabeth' #and annabeth is like 'I might be an asshole but percy is the best most loyal person I know and we all need to be willing to die for him' #and they both are so correct for it. the NARRATIVE SAYS THEY ARE CORRECT ON BOTH COUNTS. #actually uwu cuz like #thinking about the fact that annabeth takes that dagger to protect percy and it's basically her last major act before the battle is won #and the fact that percy appeals to luke by saying 'annabeth was right listen to her' and that's how he finally wins #literally using each other's fatal flaws to win and live. ANYWAY I MADE MYSELF EMOTIONAL #as you can tell i will be a fucking wreck once the series comes out nobody touch me.

[elkian]

One of the things that’s incredibly funny to me about Murderbot and ART’s meeting is that Murderbot is being so ridiculous about it.

ART: *bumps up the life support to make its construct passenger more comfortable, watches shows with its new friend, offers free surgery and advice to pass as a human, watches over Murderbot as it goes to do dangerous things, watches out for Murderbot’s new humans*

Murderbot: This asshole boat is trying to kill me and I hate it so, so much. Yes I’m being a brat about it, no I don’t intend to stop-

#19th #November #2022 #November 19th 2022 #secunit #murderbot #asshole research transport #the murderbot diaries #tmd #elk text #its unreliable narration is so fucking funny if you take two seconds to look at it from an outside perspective #murderbot even knows it's being petulant at times it just can't stop #truly the most relatable of all murder-based constructs tbh #like to be clear it has totally justifiable reasons for not wanting to do certain things #but it also can't communicate these reasons bc it's not in touch with its emotions #and can't verbalize what it's feeling #so it's stuck throwing a tantrum basically #which is so relatable that it is physically painful to me a little bit #this is the same character that took nearly 4 books to admit that its friend is its friend #....and also about 4 books to admit that ART was its friend #that tracks

[jocelynmakenna]

Ngl the story progression of RWBY never fails to make me laugh like volume 1 was like "look at this cool world! We're gonna be hunters/huntresses! We're gonna fight evil" and now it's like "I have personal beef with god"

#rwby #im not knocking it #i actually really love the progression #its just objectively funny #like remember the food fight scene where they used swordfish as swords #and now ruby committed suicide? #same fucking show #like yeah i know the cat is a parallel to salem #someone who was left by their creators bc they got bored and moved on #after giving them the worst possible curse for someone like them #fucking #NONE OF THIS WOULD HAVE HAPPENED IF THE GODS WEREN'T ASSHOLES #I GOT BEEF WITH THE GODS #STOP HURTING MY BLORBOS YOU FUCKS #ok ill shut up now #rwby spoilers

[quietwingsinthesky]

if there was a torchwood/spn crossover, jack would get shot in the head so much. i know he already dies a lot, but he’s going to die so many times during this crossover. keeps getting bullets unloaded into him. they stab him with silver and steel and copper and none of it keeps him down. he’s gonna get squirted with borax and that one’s not gonna kill him but it is going to ruin his coat, which is materially worse for him.

#also gwen cooper would wrestle dean to the ground and beat him half to death #ianto is going to get himself possessed. im not saying he doesn’t take every precaution he knows how to against it. im saying he does and it #doesnt work <3 #i think sam and tosh could be friends :) (<- actually means they’re just both stuck in ‘make this conversation go as smoothly as i can by #masking so fucking hard. so that i can leave sooner’ mode.) #and i think owen would kiss dean on the mouth because it would make him so uncomfortable and owen can and will use his ability to be an #asshole without regret for the good of the team. especially if this moment is directly a result of like. Dean hitting on Tosh while she’s #clearly not into it. Owen is going to kiss that man at the risk of getting shot just like jack has 17 times in a row just so that he’ll #fuck off and leave tosh alone. and this will work because dean winchester will immediately malfunction upon being kissed by a man because #now he doesn’t know whether to direct his homophobic impulses at owen (<- unaffected by anything he could say.) or himself (<- guy who #believes being gay works like cooties.) #and in the background you can see jack sort of gently put his hand over toshiko’s and she releases a pen she was holding onto very tightly #and this is the part where you realize Oh She Was Going To Stab Dean In The Knee With That If He Didn’t Stop. #i also think Jack should get to kiss Crowley. i think they’d both be into it and it’d be funny. i think they should reference that they’ve #been off-and-on lovers for years actually. (gwen: you’ve been sleeping??? with the king of hell???? || Jack: see i don’t know why this is #surprising to you.) (ianto has been standing there with his mouth slightly open for a full minute. long enough for crowley to comment on it #and for owen to jokingly try to shut it for him. (cue short impromptu slap fight as ianto bats his hands away and then owen gets too into #defending the honor of his poor slapped away hands.) but anyway. <3 ianto you’re into guys you really need to come to terms with this at #some point sir. jack is *not* your exception this is an all day job.)

[im-pure]

People when baxters character isnt black and white

#“HES NOT THIS HES THIS ACTUALLY” #my brother in christ he is the nuance character #im sick and tired of people attacking others for how they view baxter #“PEOPLE ONLY LIKE HIS SUAVE MASK BUT ITS NOT REALLY HIM” you have fallen into #the same exact mind trap that the character himself put himself in #where he thinks if he isnt 100% a success at something then hes a 100% failure at it #HES GREY. HES GRAY. HES IN BETWEEN. HE IS ALSO THAT. AND ALSO THIS. AND ALSO THAT. HES GRAY. STOP FUCKING WITH OTHER FANS FOR IT #YES HES A STUPID MESSY LOSER. HE IS ALSO SUAVE. YOU CAN STOP HARASSING OTHER FANS NOW #i would not be talking this much shit if i havent seen people shit on others for this exact same reason #OVER. AND OVER. AND OVER. AND OVER. AND FUCKING OVER AGAIN. #IM FED UP #IM PISSED!!!!!!!!!! #also i think the most important fact to remember is: NONE OF THIS IS REAL OH MY GOD HES JUST A CHARACTER WHY ARE YOU #FUCKING HARASSING PEOPLE OVER A CHARACTER. #im really fucking SICK OF THESE ASSHOLES #sorry for ranting so much fellow baxwardigans i have so much rage omg #I JUST WANNA HAVE FUN WITH FELLOW FUNNY MONOCHROME GUY FANS BUT WHY SO MANY ASSHOLES

[stannussy]

Mmmhh that one time a fandom darling basically showed their whole ass to me bc I wanted to talk about how someone that'd been sexually harassing me and others but tell me not to on the pretense that the person harassing us might hurt themselves just bc they were autistic 🤦🏽‍♂

#dunno men #its the combo wombo for me #also its fine y'all maybe I write abt it later on bc im all grown up now and I feel like I can finally stand up for myself #its just.... its funny in a fucked up way JNsndndjfnfj #like did multiple oopsies while trying to stand for something good #which hun.... you should've had asked first???? #funny enough I ended up getting more recenment to this person than the actual weirdo #which is not fait mind u #but still #💕🤷🏽‍♂ #thats why i basically stopped posting abt fc5 #two people ruined my enjoyment in a way I didn't felt safe anymore #jason still rocks on my heart and so does that ugly dog jacob #but its hard for me #bc it was something i could retell my issues and feel safe just for some asshole to come and take that away from me #and also a 'well meaning' fool to come and play corner while knowing NOTHING

[hecksupremechips]

Honestly though I think it’s really a bad sign when I look at Shin Tsukimi and literally feel like he’s a self insert 😩

#the klock keeps ticking #yttd #i wanna replay yttd so bad but i also like Gotta play other stuff with the time i have akskks #but yeah the brainrot this specific character has given me idk if I ever really talked about it but it was BAD #i like obsessively played the game in like 3 days and it was not a good idea lol but just like shin #i had to take like a week to recover from this guy cuz i couldnt stop thinking about him and how hes just like me fr #first off just the very inconsistent personality hes got going on that is very me he has these different personalities he wears to cope with #all the traumatic shit happening hes both so helpless its comical and so manipulative its terrifying #and idk its really interesting how like good and bad he is at being manipulative like hes very smart and can analyze weaknesses and lie so #good not even he knows the truth but hes also grasping at straws he doesnt think things through at all #like the second main game he just didnt prepare at all hes fumbling his way through everything its going so bad #he just wants to go home he wants to outdo the game makers but hes being used by them so bad he wants it to STOP #and its just the way that like. it hits so hard cuz you know hes really not a bad person not at all he doesnt want any of this hes just #being horribly manipulated and doing whatever he can to survive but its also really scary how #well hes able to lie and manipulate and claw his way through but hes also weaker than a grade schooler #and you never forget that either and as much as he cheated his way through he still failed it was all just a cheap trick in the end #and all of this hits very hard like his personality is eerily similar to mine and just the way he thinks and acts #cuz im the same like im weak and a dweeb who likes funny cats but im also emotionally detached and observant and selfish #but where it hits the hardest is his relationship with midori like oooof that one was too real just like #the first person who was ever his friend was horribly abusive and treated him like a child and didnt respect any boundaries #and he just got sick pleasure out of seeing shin be upset and he was like. a groomer #and shin was fucking relieved when he died but also kept his scarf and adopted his personality to survive #and still goes by sou after ch2 and the scene that gets me the most is when shin ai is asked about his relationship with midori #and you can just SEE how horrified shin is because his deepest shame his abuse is being shared to everyone without his consent #and hes reliving it all in that moment and literally seeing who he used to be experiencing the abuse #he just curls into himself and like covers his ears and pulls his hair thats literally what i do AAAAAA #im just so grateful for the direction they took this character kokichi ouma wishes he was shin tsukimi so bad #and yeah just like damn. its scary how similar i am to shin like damn i really am going through it huh oof #I LOVE HIM I LOVE HIM I WILL DEFEND HIM WITH MY LIFE HE DID ALL OF THAT STUFF YOUR HONOR BUT LISTENNNN #have you considered that hes cute and smart and weird and maybe just needs friends who arent assholes

[bumblingbabooshka]

'Parturition' is so brave for being the yaoi ship trope episode of Voyager. "Neelix and Tom Paris had a physical.....fight." Also continuing Tom's beautiful habit of loving both infidelity and child abandonment with all his heart. Also, wonderful out of context quote: "I had no right to push that pasta in your lap."

#Also I forgot about the Tom/Kes stuff in early seasons #You know what? I think Kes can flirt. Disaster as a real couple/ship but I do believe they'd do some going-nowhere flirting #post Neelix breakup. Also once again Kes SHOULD have been able to ADVENTURE more!!! #Tom's true wife is a beautiful woman named infidelity and he loves her more than anything except Harry Kim #Tom: (bothered & horny) Play the clarinet Harry. #Harry has a really cozy couch setup btw #OH ??? I sthis a thing??? #In two different episodes now Harry's said 'there's an old chinese expression...' <- was that something they were trying out?? #Thank God it didn't stick. #Harry: You keep setting yourself up for rejection. You must like playing the part. / Tom: Don't knock it 'till you've tried it. #<- Sound of a nail being hit squarely on the head...Harry's so handsome #YEEEAAAAH THE GIRLS ARE FIIIIIGHTIIIIIINGGGGG!!!! #Neelix being so possessive of Kes is obviously bad but him just out of nowhere insulting and tossing pasta on Tom IS very fun and good #removed from context. Tom: -eating. doing nothing- / Neelix: You fucking lowlife asshole. =_= #SNRKAHAHHAAH 'I'LL KILL YOU!!!!' CARTOON ROLLING AROUND ON THE TABLES~!!?!?? #I like how this is a fight but NOT serious at all....they are looney tunesing it #Even the background crew are like...smiling & laughing. This is so funny <3 #The doctor would love if two men fought over him. He'd be concerned and tell them to stop but he'd secretly love it I know him I know this. #'How delightful!' indeed. Kes' green & black outfit in this episode is really pretty! Also she & the doctor's banter is nice~! #'That's not funny!' / 'It's not meant to be. You LOVE autopsies?' and her laughing at him saying 'then your world must have very dry lit.' #Also love the doc's ultimate advice of 'It's not your problem' bc it's not~!! Yaoi sin planet with cure what ails em #NEELIX SAID TECHNOBABBLE!!!! HE SAID THE LINE!!!! #Tom: I'm picking up caves west of here. / Neelix: Yaaay. <3 <- negative. sarcastic. hateful. #YEEEEAAAAAAHHHH DINO PUPPET BABYYYY!!!!! #Janeway: Tuvok can you do X? / Tuvok: (preening) I have anticipated your request Captain. / Chakotay: =_= #Tom: The baby's shivering...that's normal right?? <- Yeah Tom <3 It's so normal <3 You're gonna be a great dad <3 #Also Neelix just smiling earnestly at being called Godmother...-raises brow- #Neelix & Tom: Kes - Captain - we've worked out our differences! We had a baby <3

[computer-boy]

Stop shipping quality man Dazai Osamu with irrelevant flop side characters who absolutely do not deserve his greatness and beauty

@sad-emo-dip-dye @justsomewill @stlangels @noxious-amillion @sleepy-kitty-boy @b4ckr00ms-k4ndl3z @gempuff11 @kyoukamybeloved @hmmmmmhmhmh @friedoafauthoreclipse @jkookieflowers @astraltrain @kr0issant @daz4i @pricel0ss @babygirlchuuya @2383-lines-of-code

holy shit theyre still here ahfdhjsafsjhgjhsfsdfugsdf??

#asks #sorry to all the people im pinging but this is hilarious #therye still at it... its been at least half a year #chuugly tag #this is so funny to me. pleaseee please please just get a hobby #i can recommend some things! sewing. gardening. learn a language. crochet. yoga. whatever floats your boat #get interested in some niche science and bother everyone you know about linguistics or entymology or something. collect stamps. #learn an instrument even if the only thing you can play is nursery rhymes. make pins. you can get the plastic clipon templates for 4 bucks #butlike dear anon if you Actually Genuinely For Real consider putting this whole deal on the back burner my dms are open to be friends #im not kidding i want the best for you friend #um please stop harrassing people and insulting art because it has chuuya or soukoku in it though . have you considered you are being #a fucking asshole. or whatever. maybe. #ok talk over nice chatting to you!

[running-in-the-dark]

I'm watching the new Sad Boyz episode and Jarvis has been talking about Fall Out Boy for thirty minutes and I'm juuust. not enjoying it

#I hate FOB #I'm so sorry I wish I didn't and I feel bad for it #but oh my god I hate them so much #the second concert I went to was a FOB concert. I was like 13 or 14 I guess? #anyway I was an emo kid so I did kinda like them #but they were my best friend's favourite band so I wasn't allowed to REALLY like them #but she wanted to go to the concert so I had to too. #it was a horrible experience and I had a huge panic attack because we got pushed close to the mosh pit and I couldn't move #because I was a TINY teenage girl #and I genuinely thought I was gonna die. #idk what little I saw of the show was good I think. but the fans really fucking sucked. like damn you have to be an asshole if you see #basically A KID full on sobbing and still not help them get out or anything or stop pushing and all that. #soo yeah idk it was all around just a horrible day and I haven't listened to their music since and I get really anxious when I think about #them. #funny thing is the next concert I went to after that was with my little brother and that same friend. it was a shitty german rapper #that I can't stand. BUT the fans there were so damn lovely to us. they looked out for us the whole time and everything. maybe because they #were mostly older idk #man I really hate concerts now though. #BUT I love Jarvis and I will keep watching the episode and it's fine and hopefully they'll move on soon.... #personal

[lavendorii]

anyway. good afternoon everyone and my block list that is now slightly longer

#OH! sorry my autism makes me angry and mean and stops people from having fun. i thought autism was the fun disorder! #i thought autism was the ha ha funny funny fortnight yippie disorder! and its when you like things! but youre not brash or rude or angry . #thats morally reprehensible #shut the fuck up #txt #goes into a google doc and types in the words “you are not the main character'' and then starts printing and handing them out like flyers. #self obsessed inconsiderate assholes #you ruined this

[the-gayest-sky-kid]

my brother keeps being a bitch on purpose and it's really not helping

#my therapist says hes probably doing to feel better about himself and it's like. fuckin hell dude #because like. look im not saying i dont poke fun at him either right #but i like go think i dont go below the belt in terms of shit??? #like i love him im not going to call him genuinely stupid or ugly or anything. #hes good at math and pretty capable. even if he incinerated mac n cheese once and we had to get a new microwave #but he keeps going up to me like (aether) whats a×b? oh how do you not know that instantly? are you stupid? #its because (extremely personal issue) LOL (deep cutting personal issue again) #and its like look ive never been good at mental math stop being a fucking jerk over me not knowing fuckin 9×7 off the top of my head #and i keep telling him to drop it and shut up but its just spurs him on more because its funny to him #and he keeps bringing up other shit like being queer or being trans specifically because he knows its upsetting and its just fucking funny #he loves to say people with weird pronouns and think there's more than two genders should kill themselves because he knows it makes me angr #with him. and he knows im fucking queer. he knows our grandmothers queer. and he still pulls this shit #and i cant say anything because when i do i get a whole lecture about how hes my flesh and blood and i should treat him like such #and im the asshole for suggesting he act like it for once #i love my brother and im proud of his achievements but i cant keep fucking doing this #and i know its my fault because hes a stupid kid and going through typical middle school boy bullshit #and seriously getting hurt by whatever a middle schooler says is downright pathetic #but it fucking hurts to hear someone you held as a baby and defended say people like you should kill themselves #and it hurts to have them fucking push a topic that upsets you for their own amusement #swearing cw #aethers rants #cw vent #personal posts and stuff idk

[biscuits-spooky-corner]

imagine wanting actual living breathing people to die because of their fictional ships could not be me because im normal and not chronically online 🥰

anyone who isn’t an exact copy of me are dumb and lame and also some ships are super duper dumb cause they don’t have chemistry or they’re literal siblings/family/an adult and a minor which like you do you ig but like i’m gonna bomb you

#also i don’t want anyone to die because of their ships??? that’s a genuine asshole move and if i say something like “kys” or “i’m gonna kill #-you” i don’t mean it because that’s how tumblr is you dumb fuck #people are mean and violent get used to it it’s funny as fuck #also please don’t come into my askbox to harass or be a dick to me it’s not cute or funny it’s just fucking annoying so please stop #okay sorry for the rant but i don’t really give a shit cause if you knew how to read you could read my pinned post #it says there that i’m mean to dumb people so if i was mean to you and we aren’t friends then you deserve it #also saying i’m chronically online is really funny cause like nuh uh #but sorry you’re too close minded to understand jokes i’ll change myself for you and you alone #how can i serve you #anon? how can i accommodate to your needs? it’s your world #i’m just living it it #asks

[jibunwo]

MADE FUN OF MY SIBLING AND THEY MADE A FACE AND I COULD TELL FROM THEIR FACE THAT THEY WANTED TO PUSH ME DOWN THE STAIRS AND AS I WAS OPENING MOUTH TO TELL THEM I LIKED THEIR IM GONNA PUSH YOU THE STAIRS FACE THEY SAID SHUT UP ILL PUSH THE STAIRS

#this was near the stairs but not so near that they couldve just done it. like they could see the stairs but i was not quite ripe for the #pushing so it was extra funny that i could divine their intentions from just their face #im good at that though. i have an intuition for what sorts of silly violence people are planning to enact unto me #once my friend offered me a warhead. like the candy. and i was like oh no thanks :) and he was like are you sure? and i looked at him and #immediately covered my water cup. he was like HOW THE HELL DID YOU KNOW WHAT I WAS GONNA DO WHAT THE FUCK #and i was like HOLY SHIT YOU WERE ACTUALLY GONNA DO IT I THOUGHT I WAS CRAZY #and that started a longstanding tradition of putting shit in each others waters. he liked to sneak up on me and get me with a nerf dart bc #he knew hed never manage it if i could see his face. asshole got a napkin in my milkshake in low lighting once though. i could always read #him really well with that kinda thing though like he wasnt that surprised when i stopped on the sidewalk and walked to his other side so he #couldnt shove me into the street bc wed known each other for ages at that point but they warhead thing was like. a couple weeks after we met #ALSO SHOVING ME INTO THE STREET WOULD NOT HAVE BEEN DANGEROUS WE WERE IN BUTTFUCK NOWHERE THERE WERE NOT CARS. HE WOULD NOT SHOVE ME INTO #THE STREET TO GET HIT BY CARS. WORST INJURIES I WOULDVE GOTTEN WERE SKINNED KNEES AND THAT WOULDVE BEEN HILARIOUS AND HED NEVER HAVE LIVED #IT DOWN. BUT NO CARS. NO GETTING HIT BY CARS. ALWAYS HAVE TO REMEMBER SHOVING PEOPLE INTO THE STREET GETS THEM HIT BY CARS WHEN I TELL THAT #STORY BC ITS GETS ME INTO THE BUTTFUCK NOWHERE MINDSET WHERE CARS DONT HIT PEOPLE THEY ONLY HIT DEER #what was my point. dont remember. oh well send tweet or whatever #mine

[andthebeanstalk]

pssst.... there are a lot of queer christians! their experiences and faith are valid. it sucks you weren't able to jive with the church, but don't act like its impossible because of your sexuality when many other lgbt folx have managed just fine

My friend, you do you, but being a faggot dyke tranny helped keep me out of an abusive organization, and for me and all of my formerly religious friends, that is that.

#t slur #f slur #d slur #truly I am working through a rainbow alphabet of queer slurs at this time! #original #listen if you're able to believe that your God loves you then you should do that. #I tried to for many years myself. but it never came back no matter how much I wanted it #and I think the fact that queer people are generally safer in non-religious environments in America is extremely telling #alright i think I've officially hit my limit with this so I'm probably gonna stop responding to anons #I was such a good little Christian Child. but I was so so sad and so scared and so ashamed. and I didn't even know I was gay yet! #I get that there are queer christians but like. there are waaay more former Christian queers for a reason. #seems only a very small percentage of us born into the church grow up to be in the church #I like how Stephen Fry talks about it. a lot of atheist speakers are fucking assholes about it like Bill Maher but Stephen Fry really #approaches the issue from what appears to be a genuine love for other humans and a desire to see them treated well #maybe it's not impossible for YOUR sexuality but for me I'm too nose deep in pussy praise the Lord it's a medical condition XD #in my defense humor also helped me leave the church. things have less power when they can be funny. and i needed it to have less power. #because it was an abusive situation #gods I'm so proud of the phrase 'nose-deep in pussy'. can't believe I thought of that in a goddamn catechism post 😅 #actually no wait I can totally believe that

[rinringringu]

god i know classroom of the elite is a LN/anime targeted to cishet men and so the fanbase is full of them but they're so fucking annoying i need them to shut up for one sec

#legit saw a dude pull the ''false rape accusations are worse than actual rape'' under a characters wiki... be fucking for real. #it's almost funny how ayanokoji can be a total batshit insane asshole who uses people for his own gain- #-and he is praised for it- #-but when kikyo does the same exact thing at a much lower deegre shes called a bitch and hated by everyone #not to mention she actually has a reason you can empathize with at a certian level #at least i did personally #and im not saying you can't like ayano. i like ayano! but stop having double standards ffs #cote #;; 🩸 daniel talks