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#Relationship advice
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We need to make sure that we’re someone our loved ones can come to if we’ve hurt them accidentally or overstepped a boundary. We need to work at being a safe person for this.
If we spiral, or go on about how awful we are, that person is less likely to feel safe coming to us in the future because of the emotional labour involved in having to turn around and comfort us instead. And this can cause long-term issues that end up destroying our relationship.
It’s okay to feel guilty. It’s okay to feel bad. And it’s okay to express that if you need to make sure they know you care about it. But it should be expressed like “I’m really sorry. I feel bad about that because you’re important to me and I’m going to do better in the future. Thank you for letting me know.”
If you express it like “I’m such a terrible friend. Why are you friends with me? I don’t deserve forgiveness. I don’t deserve anything” then, whether intentional or not, this comes off as manipulative and can lead to the other person feeling they need to comfort you and hide their feelings.
It’s hard because a lot of us were treated similarly. We learned our behaviour from being treated the same when we tried to communicate our feelings. But it wasn’t okay that was done to us, and it isn’t okay if we do it to others. It’s not too late to learn and do better.
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dreamgirlglowup · 20 hours
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🎀 How To Be The Prize 🎀
Know your worth — yes, we all have inherent worth as human beings, but you also need to know your worth as a woman.
Heal your wounds and trauma. Healing is a life long journey, but you love yourself enough to do the inner work consistently to be your best in this moment.
Cultivate a beautiful life for you — invest in your hobbies, health, social life, etc. Do things that bring you joy — not for a man or to impress a man.
⋆౨ৎ˚⟡˖ ࣪
Learn more here: 💖 dream girl glow up 💖
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dailyquotes6563 · 1 day
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Love isn't something you parcel out to just some people. You spread it around. The more people you love, the more people you're capable of loving.
Christine Nolfi, The Road She Left Behind
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mauvefiles · 10 months
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When a woman is consistently spoken to softly & treated gently, she becomes a new woman. You're helping her heal her nervous system, you're helping her heal generational trauma, you're allowing her feminine energy to flourish, you're helping her to remember who she is.
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theambitiouswoman · 2 months
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Green Flags in Communication 💚💬
"I want to know when I hurt your feelings."
This shows they are willing to understand and acknowledge the impact of their actions.
"I don't want you to feel alone in this."
This shows empathy and indicates that the person is supportive and does not want the person to deal with issues alone.
"I've been struggling with ___”
This demonstrates vulnerability and trust, as the person is open about their struggles.
"How have you been feeling about ___? I know it's been on your mind a lot."
This shows concern for the other person's issues or worries, showing that they are listening and care about what's important to the other person.
"I feel __ when you __; are you open to trying __ next time?"
This is an example of constructive communication.
"What do you need from me when this happens with your family?"
This shows awareness and sensitivity to the persons family dynamics and a willingness to provide support.
"I appreciate when you ___.”
Expressing appreciation is vital for positive reinforcement and acknowledging the efforts and qualities of the other person.
"I didn't handle that well."
This is a sign of self-awareness and accountability, recognizing one's own mistakes and being open to learning and growth.
"I'm sorry, I was wrong to say that. I'll try to be more mindful in the future."
Shows you are able to apologize genuinely and a commitment to improving behavior.
"Tell me more about that; I'm really interested in hearing your perspective."
Indicates a genuine interest in the other person's thoughts and feelings.
"I noticed you seemed a bit off today. Is everything okay?"
It shows you are attentive to the other person's emotional state and a readiness to provide support.
"I'm here for you, no matter what you need."
Offers unconditional support, creating a sense of security in the relationship.
"I love how passionate you are about your hobbies. It's inspiring to see."
Expresses admiration for the other person's interests.
"Let's work on a solution together. What do you think would be fair?"
Focusing on collaboration rather than conflict.
"I trust your judgment on this."
Trust and respect for the other person's decision-making abilities.
"Your happiness is important to me. Let's make sure you're taking time for yourself."
Prioritizes the other person's happiness and emphasizes the importance of self care.
"It's okay to feel that way. Do you want to talk about it more?"
Validates the other person's feelings.
"I appreciate how you handled that situation. You're really good at ___."
Praises specific strengths or skills, boosting the other person's self-esteem.
"I know we disagree, but I respect your point of view."
Acknowledges differences in opinion while still maintaining respect and understanding.
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newrelationshipgoals · 2 months
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Update me, disturb me, tell me about your day. I love all that.
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femmefatalevibe · 6 months
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Femme Fatale Guide: 15 Essential Business Skills Everyone Should Master
Articulate, confident communication
Crafting effective, compelling pitches
Operating and communicating through a solution-oriented framework
Research of all types (Google, market research, studies, polls, interpersonal conversations, etc.)
Learning how to streamline, edit, and organize information in a clear and logical way
Accumulating high-level working knowledge/proficiency in all tools and programs directly related to your type of work/industry
Budgeting and financial optimization (investment, tax benefits, etc.)
Reading and interpreting legal contracts/documents
Setting rates, boundaries, and learning when/how to delegate
Good posture, direct eye contact, and a firm handshake
Building streamlined systems for onboarding, different repeat project scopes/workflows, and KPI measuring
The art of following up, listening to (potential) clients' needs, asking thoughtful questions, and benefit-oriented salesmanship
Consistently reading, learning, and studying current events/cultural platforms/industry and field-related knowledge
How to spot customer/client/business partner red flags
Self-management, task/project prioritization, and optimization of your personal energy clock + levels
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todays-xkcd · 2 months
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Good to be a little wary of advice that sounds too much like a self pep talk.
Relationship Advice [Explained]
Transcript
[White Hat, Cueball and Ponytail are walking. White Hat has his palm out.] White Hat: What you have to remember is, relationships aren't easy. Ponytail: Yeah, fair.
[Close-up of White Hat with his finger raised.] White Hat: They're hard. They require constant work. White Hat: A relationship is a job. Off-panel voice: I guess...
[White Hat has stopped walking and is facing Cueball and Ponytail standing a bit further away.] White Hat: It's a challenge that feels overwhelming. It's a crushing burden. Cueball: Umm.
[White Hat has his arms raised while still facing Cueball and Ponytail.] White Hat: A relationship is a grueling ordeal. Cueball: ...Who are you trying to convince, exactly? Ponytail: Yeah, are you okay? White Hat: I'm fine! This is normal!
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sometiktoksarevalid · 8 months
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sk-lumen · 11 months
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A price I'm never willing to pay again is losing myself just for the sake of keeping another person.
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borderlinereminders · 5 months
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Something that was crucial to me being able to foster healthy relationships (platonic and romantic) was learning those around me aren’t mind readers.
Communicating honestly and effectively can allow people to be there for you. It can also allow you to work out conflicts in order to maintain long term relationships.
It might seem “wrong” to ask for your needs to be met. But it isn’t. In fact, usually our loved ones prefer us to be up front with our needs rather than hinting at them. (Hinting is exhausting for both parties and easily missed.)
Communicate your boundaries. “When you tease me about —-, it really upsets me. Please don’t do that anymore.”
Communicate what is working for you. “When you reach out to check in when I’m having a hard time, it really helps and makes me feel supported.”
Communicate what you need. “Things are really hard right now. I could use the company of a friend. Can I call you?”
A lack of communication can lead to relationships breaking. Resentment builds. Misunderstandings happen. Feelings get hurt.
If you don’t tell your loved ones what you need, then it’s unfair to us and them to be upset at them for not reading your mind.
You are allowed to have needs and wants. And you are allowed to express them.
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dreamgirlglowup · 2 days
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🎀 How to Get Princess Treatment 🎀
Prioritize the important qualities in a man:
How he loves and respects you, his discipline, his values, his character, etc.
Does he have a provider mindset? Will he be the kind of husband you want? If you want children, will he be a good father to your future children?
Do not focus too much on superficial qualities, such as looks, what car he drives, or how much money he says he has.
⋅˚₊‧ ୨୧ ‧₊˚ ⋅
Learn more here: 💖 dream girl glow up 💖
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dailyquotes6563 · 2 days
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Your character is not a fixed thing. You will sometimes have to move to keep up with it.
Matt Haig, The Humans
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mauvefiles · 10 months
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At this point in my life, it doesn’t matter how much I love you, how long I’ve known you, how much we’ve experienced together. If I feel a way about your actions, I’m gracefully removing myself from your life. I can’t change anyone and I don’t want to. I’m noticing now more than ever how people move and there’s just certain things I no longer want to put my energy into. People do exactly what they want regardless of your feelings, advice or opinions. Some people don’t notice your impact until your presence is no longer at their convenience✨
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theambitiouswoman · 5 months
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Don't tell people your boundaries. Show them.
If you tell someone they can't talk to you a certain way or do certain things, those are not boundaries. Boundaries are things we show. If you tell someone "if you do that again I am not going to speak to you" and you stay and continue to speak to them, that's not a boundary. Just words. Words that they now know means absolutely nothing and they can take advantage of.
You show people how to treat you.
You reinforce your boundaries with your actions. Unless you show someone with your actions that what they are doing is not okay, and you do not continue to allow it, they will keep doing it.
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