#Reality hurts

[i-should-have-stayed-home]

I Miss the kid me. The one with only happiness in their heart. The one who didn't yet care about what or who they are, and was just happy to be.

I miss the me I was before it all.

#i miss me #sad thoughts #reality hurts #reality #trans ftm #trans #transmasc

[epicwin64]

Me originally thinking Futaba Sakura was going to be a happy gamer girl only for reality to set in

#futaba sakura #persona 5 #when sojiro said her mother killed herself my jaw dropped #reality hurts #i feel sorry for her #persona 5 royal #ouch #give her a hug #I love how her palace is egyptian themed

[trappedinmy-mind]

Shattered plate

There is this plate that has fallen to the ground multiple times but surprisingly is always strong enough to not break. It’s a thicker plate with flowers on it, we’ve had it for years now. It’s beautiful and it’s my favourite. Over and over it falls and falls, and we laugh that this plate is so strong it’s never going to shatter. We’ve had lots of other plates that fall once and it breaks in an instant, but not this one. But little do we know that the plate has little hairline fractures that we don’t notice, that over time the little fractures become bigger, with each use and each fall.

We are the plate, our relationship is the plate. We fall and fall over and over, never breaking, thinking that we are okay, saying that we are okay. Moving right along in our life in routine; like the plate moves from the dishwasher to the cupboard. But little do we know that we are breaking everyday , but with just small hairline fractures that we don’t notice. Until one day, we open the cupboard to get the plate that we have both relied on over and over again to see that it had shattered on its own in the dark. The impact of falling didn’t break it, it was that it kept falling, never mending , that one day it just broke, silently. That was us, we didn’t break over one big crash, we broke silently over time, that one day we woke up and found our relationship shattered in the dark. Do you keep a shattered plate?

~e.t. | trappedinmy-mind

#trapped in my mind #shattered plate #shattered heart #my writing #you can fix a plate back up with tape right? #my mind #my heart #heartbreak #emotions #feelings #writers on tumblr #why #wasted #my words #writerscafe #never ending #reality hurts #relationship #relationship quotes #scary truth #naked truth #i love you #poems on tumblr #young love #truth is painful #i have to leave #do I? #mine #parts of my mind #it’s not always bad

[carry-on-my-wayward-butt]

imagine getting twenty four hours of a fraction of a taste of what marginalized bloggers on this fucking site have been told "doesn't break TOS" for the past 15 years and deciding to openly threaten to just nuke the entire website lmfao

#op #you know what makes people hesitant to fork money over to tumblr? #the fact that the leadership is so incredibly out of touch with the reality of this place #that his paper thin skin chafes at the mere thought of transparency and accountability. #you're a grown man worth hundreds of millions of dollars #stop pissing and shitting in your diaper about your feelings being hurt and do your fucking job

[borealistic]

it's so cool and so sexy how my best ideas for writing are at fucking 5am in the morning when i can't find my glasses let alone open a word doc

#reality hurts #fanfiction #ao3 #writers block #says someone who has never published a goddamn thing #no cause fr ill be writing poetic verse at 5am while my alarm rings like a death knell

[mooninkling]

Gifted kid they told me I was sometime, And lie it would be to say I didn't believe. One day, when, I don't know to tell, Life decided I had it too well. I found myself between the walls Of trusting myself or my teen phase calls. Horrendous nights full of tissues hidden under the bed, Days on the phone with a smiling dad. Things started fading, Never once I was or wanted to be depressing But everything felt without meaning As my life when I was 9 or 10 and I found about dying.

-Fragment from Gotta sort you out

#thoughts #my poetry #writing poetry #absolutely exhausted #i keep remembering those days #how the world started to suffocate me little by little #and i was so surprised #expecting the beautiful life I saw on TV since I was a kid #expecting the beautiful life of a teenager that never came #i was just a kid #just a kid when the world hit me #shook reality #destroyed #everything #plagued my mind with darkness #teenage #kid #life #reality hurts

[iwannadance]

history repeats itself . . .

#realism #reality #reality hurts #fml

[puppetmaster13u]

Prompt 71

Klarion is delighted, excited, impatient, and so very happy. He’s found a friend, not the justice league baby-crew who don’t know how to make friends properly or the order-magician who doesn’t play right, but another realm-being his age! They’re even around the same death-date, his is just a couple years earlier! But to beings who aren’t adults until they’re well into the hundreds that’s practically nothing!

His new friend even has a familiar too- even if he has to explain what a familiar is- and, and even shares his two other friends with him! 

He’s been in this world for what feels like so long trying to make friends and he’s made three in just a month! And they even know how to properly play and wrestle without targeting Teekl like a certain order lord who he doesn’t like. 

Oh! Hey it’s the justice league kiddy-crew! Were they feeling neglected or something?

#chaotic friendship au #dcxdp #dpxdc #prompts #klarion is roughly 4 years older in death years than danny #he found another baby ancient godling! #klarion is trying to cause mischief and play but there's a big culture clash #he's very confused why the young justice team only come for playdates whenever he pulls pranks #But now they've come over for a playdate all on their own!! #Phantom look at them they're learning he's so proud! #Someone: Klarion is very childish & destructive- #Tucker and Sam: He's only six stop being mean to him and his emotional support cat >:/ #Danny is delighted to have a friend whose also down for pranks and chaos but who understands he also has things like school #Realms familiars are emotional support animals that help their respective being #Since realms beings are usually half emotions (at least in core) hurting a familiar hurts their 'ghost' too #Danny's rogues just saw new door open and wanted to play #I mean look at them they're all like 30 years old at most #to the infinite realms that's like nothing #The fentons punched a hole in reality in the equivalent of one of the daycare areas of the zone that formed *after* they had put Pariah the #klarion the witch boy #danny fenton #Danny & Klarion when meeting Ellie: Its free battle friend #Dan will be so confused because in his timeline he never became friends with this other... holy fuck is this another halfa-

[vincent-sinclair-deserved-better]

i want to not be here i want to go away i want to not exist in this reality

living with fictional serial killer twins and their little brother and a dead town just seems much more desirable

#reality hurts #cylas speaks

[gatitahhh]

Your own blood are the worst. They make you feel worthless and not enough. Nothing seems to ever be enough or good. I want to disappear….

-Gatitahh

#life #relationships #family #families #family problems #sad thoughts #inner thoughts #spilled words #spilled heart #reality hurts #words hurt #hurting #depression #sad truth #sad #im sad

[bird--egg]

No one will understand you--you are all alone

[ID: Colored digital art featuring Lionblaze holding Dovepaw in StarClan and Hawkfrost holding Ivypaw in the Dark Forest. Their positions are mirrored vertically, linked by Dovepaw and Ivypaw's twined tails.

In the top half of the image, Lionblaze holds Dovepaw close to himself, shielding her with his paws, and he growls protectively at the viewer. Dovepaw seems to be uncomfortable at Lionblaze's overprotectiveness, trying to get out of his grasp. She has a solid yellow halo behind her head, and there's a larger yellow ring around her and Lionblaze. Six disembodied eyes are watching them. Outside the ring are several winged StarClan cats, with halos above their heads and around their wrists.

In the bottom reversed half of the drawing, Hawkfrost draws Ivypaw closer to himself, smiling deviously as he covers her face with his paws. Ivypaw looks away with a downcast expression. She has a solid red halo behind her head, and it's dripping like blood. Behind her and Hawkfrost is a dark purple forest of dead trees. Six paws claw upwards towards StarClan. Where the two sides connect are clouds and dripping blood.

The second image is identical, except that it is flipped so that Hawkfrost and Ivypaw are on the top. End ID] ID written by @curlfeatherstar

#wc #wc art #warriors #warrior cats #warrior cats art #ivypool #ivypaw #dovewing #dovepaw #hawkfrost #lionblaze #i always felt unsatisfied with how Ivypool and Dovewing ended up. hating each other and misunderstanding each other #like the erins sort of flubbed their charater arcs #when in reality they were both so young when they were manipulated and groomed by older cats #both taught that they were somehow 'special' #that they couldn't tell anyone what they were doing #even if they were getting hurt #or they were lonely #both of them isolated #lionblaze's intentions were more noble than hawkfrost of course #but the point stands #starclan

[badboysteve]

Steve really looked at these severely traumatized kids regularly giving him shit, threatening to prosecute him, dragging him into danger left and right and said:

'Yeah! Yeah, give me six of my own. I want to do this for the rest of my life.'

And I think that's beautiful.

#steve harrington #the party #erica sinclair #Steve said he always wanted a large family #but before meeting dustin #that was probably kore of an abstract thought #because he'd never really spent much time with people younger than him #because that could have hurt his cool guy image #and then he meets these little shits #who are antagonistic #and traumatized #and don't listen to him for shit #it would have been so easy to turn that into a reality check for him #but instead it became confirmation that this really is what he wants #its how I know he's gonna be a good dad one day #the foundation is already there

[hanafubukki]

Death.

That’s what would end this dream.

But it wasn’t fair, this was supposed to be a happy dream was it not?

But someone needed to die in order for Lilia to wake up.

In order for them to stop Malleus.

It would be cruel to have Mallenoa die in front of Lilia, in a dream that was supposed to end happily.

It would be too much if any of you were to cause such a demise.

But any other answer would be just as cruel.

The devoted son? No, that would break Lilia.

The overly loyal prodigee? No, that would add trauma and guilt for Lilia and might affect his relationship with Baul.

Grim had little to no ties with Lilia, his death would not cause him to wake up nor would you allow any harm to come to him.

…so that left only one answer.

Yours.

It would have to be the shock from your death that would awaken everyone from this dream.

Your hands shook.

Will this work?

And if it didn’t, what would happen to you? To the others? To Malleus?

As you stare at Mallenoa and the victorious fae army celebrating their win against the Knight of Dawn.

You had made a choice.

You breathed.

Deep breathes in.

Deep breaths out.

You swiftly turned.

I’m so sorry.

You knew your choice would bring pain to a number of people. Lilia and Malleus, who would lose a sister and mother respectively. They would also loose you if anything went wrong in this dream and reality.

Sebek, Silver, and Grim would feel devastated at not being able to stop you.

But this was the only way and the one least painful.

…you hoped.

You had never confessed your feelings to Lilia. You didn’t have the chance to, especially after he announced his departure.

And you couldn’t be selfish and weigh him down with your feelings.

But you hoped he cared enough about you that it would work. That the fleeing glances from General Lilia was an indicator of his feelings for you.

You allowed your self to be selfish just this once. You hoped that you would be enough to wake him up because anything else would be too painful.

If not, then at least it was just your death and the least painful of the four.

If this doesn’t work, I can at least keep Malleus company…despite his inky self and how awkward it might be.

By now, you can hear voices questioning what you were doing. You can hear the alarms in their voices as you near the edge of a cliff without any falter in your steps.

You turn around, there’s barely any space left between you and the air that would welcome you.

The others are in varying degrees of panic.

General Lilia had noticed the commotion by now, his eyes widening as he took in your form.

Good, he would be too far to get to you in time.

You smiled at them.

It will be alright.

…you fell back.

…only to wake up gasping back in Diasomnia’s lounge.

With several gasps echoing right after yours.

Part 2

#tw death #tw suicide implied #tw suicide #<- just in case #twst angst #first two tags implied since it is a dream world and not reality #Lilia Vanrouge #lilia vanrouge x reader #twst lilia vanrouge #twst x reader #twisted wonderland x reader #twst x you #hurt no comfort #kind of #open ending ish #hopefully ending #ambiguous ending

[kikker-oma]

Poor Four, he really has no idea what's happening to him 🥺

#poor boy is confused and hurt #wondering if this is a dream or reality #are thes mist people here to help or hurt? #Four sure doesnt know #hes just wondering where this wound came from #and where the heck did his sword just go? #linked universe #linkeduniverse #lu fanart #lu four #lu boys #tw blood

[mooninkling]

The part I hate and love most about reading is that it makes me wonder about a different way of living. Makes me yearn to wake up by the beach and fall asleep under the prying eyes of the stars. Convinces me that there is someone out there waiting for someone to talk with until the sun comes out. Someone that loves the quiet and the noise, the adventure and the peacefulness of the world, the history and future of all things, the magic of reading. Just like I do.

And so I dream over and over again, losing slowly all the hope I gathered with each story. With each word that seems to go further away from me.

#reading #life of a reader #thinking too much #sick of the words as we know it #reality hurts

[mewtwo24]

I finally finished reading the fourth volume of svsss in full, and thing is--the first time through I only read the bingqiu content because I was ravenous for more of their happy ending.

Turns out that was a perilous mistake.

Because I started reading the airplane extras. And I swear to god. MXTX is trying to kill me

What do you MEAN demon lord Binghe was sitting on his big fucking throne. All stoic and forbidding. Surrounded by his demon generals who don't know shit about human courtship. Asking them what he should do, fully demoralized by constant rejections from sqq, only to have airplane tell him to act more pathetic and needy. Which is already hysterically funny and insane, UNTIL LBH'S RESPONSE IS THIS, KILLING ME INSTANTLY:

LUO BINGHE. WHY DOES HE SAY IT LIKE: "I already tried that, didn't work--nothing works :/ not mean, not maidenly, not housewife, not spicy, not capable disciple. Is doubling down on clingy really all it will take? What's a born hater with only one love in his life to do????"

The dichotomy of him sitting there like 'how can I reach the unfathomable depths of shizun's heart?' A HEART HE'S ALREADY WON OVER, MIND and then in the Holy Mausoleum solving the puzzle without blinking and being like 'oh yeah you just have to hit the acupoints, no sweat.' Literally the comedy writes itself I'm so--

How am I supposed to be normal about this. MXTX understands the juicy quintessential queer joy of a person with the world's power at their fingertips wishing only for love. Willing to do anything to earn that love, when unbeknownst to them it's already been freely given. Totally not screaming and yelling and clawing at the walls

And that's not even touching airplane's uproarious account of events. The way he's like 'lol what's next, lbh and sqq are best friends now? smfh' only to see lbh TACKLE SQQ LOVINGLY. FOR SQQ TO BE BASHFUL ABOUT IT BUT SO SO FOND OF THE LITTLE SCAMP. This when we've been experiencing sqq's constant inner monologue of 'I'm so cool and so dignified about my role, truly the epitome of propriety and poser-level fortitude.' Meanwhile, in their universe:

Airplane constantly flaming???? Sqq and lbh in his observations????? His absolute bewilderment and confusion????? Legendary. No notes every single second of this shit was hilarious.

Airplane's comment that sqq + older adolescent lbh traveling together was just watching a couple in their honeymoon phase. OR the fact that lbh is exceedingly petty and refuses to share their food in the wake of airplane's interruption of their time together, until sqq relents sheepishly and insists airplane eat what's left (ONLY AFTER PLACATING LBH WITH MORE FOOD FROM HIS PLATE, SOBBING)

Watching airplane salivate over Mobei-Jun and acting like that's totally normal behavior. Finding out mbj and airplane got together first. Finding out sqq encouraged airplane. LIKE THIS. WHILE HE IS STILL IN DENIAL ABOUT HIS OWN FEELINGS:

Mobei-jun clearly thinking their arrangement is a forever thing, heartbroken his human abandoned him with all the hapless fury of a scorned wife swept away by false promises of fidelity. Airplane writing demons to be the type to beat up their crush lovingly and still unable to connect the dots about mbj's feelings. Mbj letting him go and respecting his wishes, only relenting when there's indication airplane was poorly processing his own feelings and didn't actually want to leave. Mbj caring for him and listening to him as soon as airplane voices what he needs directly and with clarity. None of these gays are functional and it's everything to me

Unrelated, but I physically can't hold this information in anymore:

I'm still reeling from younger lbh having his sexual awakening from the image of sqq wrapped in the immortal binding cables. Condemn me as you like he was so, so real for that.

And no I will not be taking any comments about how luo bingge couldn't bear to see luo binghe cherished in ways he never got to have and all the haunting implications of that. I will also not be taking any comments about luo binghe's instinct to look for sqq in that alternate universe, only to be shaken to the very core to be unable to find his shizun anywhere. The unspeakable and latent horror of his relentless mind likely piecing together what happened, but unable to say it; to suspect what is true, and live with the harrowing confusion of his double's actions. To blame himself, to assume that he had let his anger get the better of him in that world and result in unspeakable folly...

I also refuse to talk about how heartrending it is to hear Tianlang-jun weakly say "In the end, I really can't bring myself to hate humans." The implication that the foolishness of that hope and bright-eyed fondness--the very thing that put him through such unspeakable agony--couldn't be beaten out of him entirely. To discover that his faith in Su Xiyan hadn't been misplaced, to the contrary: his beloved hadn't scorned him at all, but rather fought to the miserable end to protect the fruition of their genuine feelings of love when she couldn't protect tlj or herself.

How MXTX has sqq deliberately draw parallels between their situation and that of ygy+sj and tlj+sx; desperately wishing it might not be too late for them. The concept of breaking cycles of abuse and harm pervasive throughout the newly devised story, how it evolves for the better only when love takes the place of power, pride, and domination. How the moment sqq chooses vulnerability instead of saving face, the genre shifts to the so-called "cringe" girly genre where most if not every character is more fulfilled, more true to themselves. How the "male-oriented" former genre was aimlessly sensationalized and sexualized, how it was a sustained performance of aspirational toxic masculinity. How men objectify other men without end. All of the unspoken gendered implications that come with that.

Anyways. Going to go put my head in a sandbox and try to process everything I just witnessed because even a second reading is not enough to find a modicum of closure.

#svsss #bingqiu #moshang #i swear to god this series is just 'gay man who doesn't know shit inflicting his delusional reality on everyone else and inciting chaos' #and literally it's slapstick levels of hilarious every single time; mxtx never change #also i fully agree that we did not get NEARLY enough mobei-jun and sqh/airplane content #the amount of mental illness to mental illness communication going on there was astonishing #mobei-jun being afraid of his uncle and bringing sqh because that's the only person he trusts fully (WAILING NOISES) #sqh having a tantrum but running away because for the first time he was honest about his needs + his dissatisfaction with catering to other #how that reflects his narrative compulsions and how he felt forced to warp more creative story paths for the sake of survival as a writer #how sqq's restoration of much of his original intent--as well as mobei-jun's acceptance of his needs--helps airplane begin to heal #how his happiness begins; how just like sqq he wanders in such confusion and denial before he's forced to realize what truly matters to him #SHREK VOICE: STORIES HAVE. L A Y E R S #it feels like modern day shakespeare and when i say that i don't mean it in a hollow elevating sense i mean it more like #mxtx just hits that perfect balance of poignance but also hilarious concentric circles of botched communication and brainworms #okay but real talk for a minute? .........;-; #the way lbh constantly struggles with such a crushing feeling that he'll be abandoned over any little mishap/thing/problem #really hit me where it hurts??? if only because its so clearly an anxiety that stems from original goods' upbringing #the way it becomes even more heartrending when you think back to all the sect leaders clamoring that he should have been killed as an infan #that he should have been aborted as a fetus--insisting right in front of him that his birth was a mistake and a disgrace #over having demon blood in his veins. like my god that scene is so viscerally upsetting i struggle to read it #the way its so easy to see the demons as a manifestation of otherness in precipitated form #how both sqq and sqh are influenced by human rhetoric without evening meaning to--assuming the worst against their better judgment #how both sqq and sqh both struggle with their own otherness in different ways and only find solace when they begin to accept who they are #how their lovers (lbh and mbj respectively) both are willing to navigate those confusing waters with them #how both demons love them as they are--accept them as they are despite how difficult forgiveness of perceived betrayal is for them #ty mxtx for changing my brain chemistry #as i get older i have such a fondness for the messiness of thematic queer self-discovery and growth into self-acceptance #that and how youth can so easily be defined by perfectionistic self-harm and the violence of repression