#Phil is a hazard to be around

[evilkitten3]

i will say that i find it annoying how quick mcu fans are to blame fury about every little thing. like i've seen people object to nat's "eighty people in two days" comment by saying that fury was responsible for most of them (which he was, but quite frankly a government agency that exists to protect earth from extraterrestrial threats should be willing to accept members dying to keep a hostile alien from escaping with the most powerful object earth has literally ever seen, so i actually have no problem with that decision of his - everyone in that base was shown to be highly trained and aware that death was a likely outcome– note that loki knifing several people in the throat did not cause anyone to turn and run. they're secret agent soldiers, this is their job)

BUT nat pinning that on loki isn't fury's fault. we have no reason to think he told her anything but what actually happened, as nat is as much of a professional as any of the soldiers in that base were. i don't know if that was intentional manipulation on nat's part (again, i have no problem with that– twisting the truth to motivate people to fight back against the alien whose stated intention is world domination is fine by me), or if she just made an assumption and fury didn't care enough to correct her (in which case the blame would be somewhat on him but frankly getting into semantics when you need to be focused on the actual alien threat is kinda pointless), or if nat just has a mindset of root cause->fault (which would've been interesting but g-d forbid we focus on nat's personality instead of her ass), but it's still not fury's fault that she said that

fury was one of the best characters in the first avengers movie (which wasn't like cinematic brilliance or anything but you know what it was a fun movie and i enjoyed it cringe isn't real in this instance), and people are way too willing to ignore the surprising amount of depth that movie gave him in favor of "government man bad" (which. ok yes i agree with that in principle irl but tony stark is a billionaire and thor tried to invade a sovereign nation like a year ago; you gotta make allowances for fiction or else they're all horrible)

the council fired two missiles at new york. everyone remembers tony yeeting the second into space, but i think people forget that fury took down the first one (somehow without killing the pilot):

to be clear, the world council are basically his bosses. they ordered him to nuke the city and he refused. they went and did it anyway. hill warned fury and he managed to stop the first missile himself and was also the one who alerted tony to the second.

just..... credit where credit is due, yeah? fury's not a cardboard cutout of a character, he's probably the mcu's first real attempt at a protagonist character entirely in the morally gray zone whose decisions and actions as a character are both shown in a way that also the audience to understand where he's coming from while also giving them the space to say whether they think he was right or not.

the whole "using the tesseract to make weapons" thing makes sense. he has a good reason for it too– even ignoring what we learned in captain marvel, the events of the first thor movie made it clear that aliens were out there and could fuck shit up, something agents of s.h.i.e.l.d. then established he'd known even before that. and he's right– earth really, really, really isn't prepared to defend itself against what's out there.

also, kudos to that scene in particular for doing a pretty good job of giving characters reactions that made sense for those characters (usually this is something that shouldn't need brownie points, but it's whedon, so not basing the whole thing on snark that could come from anyone is a step up). steve is against making weapons with the tesseract bc that's what hydra did (and while he has every right to feel that way and be angry about fury not mentioning that, i feel like it needs to be said that there's a noticeable difference between "i'm making this to take over the world" and "i'm making this so we don't get murdered by fucking aliens"), tony is against it bc he has weapon-making trauma, bruce is against it bc he doesn't trust the government (nor should he), thor is against it bc he thinks humans are meddling with what they shouldn't (which. sure but that's sorta our thing. we're the "hey what's that let's meddle with it" species), clint isn't there, and nat doesn't give two shits.

anyway this is a whole lotta nothing but i love nick fury and he deserves better than being written as a cardboard cut-out convenient antagonist in fanfiction (especially if the author goes out of their way to have coulson and hill be good guys trapped under fury's tyrannical thumb. real subtle, y'all.)

#mcu #marvel #nick fury #samuel l jackson #i know someone is going to interpret this as me saying ''all power to the american military'' so i'll just address that here: #fuck the government fuck america fuck the military fuck colonialism give the land back #also i don't care what the movies try to say shield stands for strategic hazard intervention espionage logistics directorate #and it's international fuck you movies #first director was still richard stoner but only bc his name is hilarious #also no one asked but in my hc clint is only an agent bc people call him that #as far as most of the higher ups are concerned he just showed up one day and wouldn't go away and they let him stick around bc he was funny #and useful sometimes #fury: coulson there's a guy in a nest over there #coulson: oh that's barton. i let him live here and sometimes he shoots stuff for me #fury: ...you adopted him didn't you #coulson: HE NEEDED A HOME NICK #clint: *visibly a grown man who absolutely has a home* *munches doritos* yeah nick what are you gonna do send me back to the circus #fury: ...fine he can stay. (seriously phil just let me know ahead of time when you bring home strays that's all i'm asking) #a few years later clint shows up with natasha #clint: hey she followed me home can we keep her #fury: are you actually asking or...? #clint: not really. i mean i offered her my nest but she said she wanted a job #natasha: i was a black widow #fury: cool gonna need to vet you a LOT but hired

[qtubbo]

Saw a post talking about Empanada being reluctant to call Phil uncle, “Phil uh uncle uh Phil” so I wanted to put my thoughts on the matter for how it relates to Em as a whole. Rambling below :] (not really about at all Phil mainly about Em)

Most of the eggs refer to all the islanders as their tio or tia, even ones they are not particularly close to, this is very much islander culture and I’m fairly certain Em has picked up on it. To me her trying to push herself to call Phil uncle even when not feeling close enough to do so, comes from trying to fit. Empanada has shown over and over again that she will do anything to keep the happiness of their (pepito em sunny) current life, including making her behavior more sympathetic and acting weaker. It’s a very normal instinct to try and match the behavior of the people around you for survival, and it seems likely that Em is doing just that. Empanada has nothing against Phil, and has never shown any more hateful or negative feelings towards him, she’s nervous but she is like that with most adults.

She calls Bad, Pac, and Fit tio, so this is less of a Empanada doesn’t want to overstep into Phil’s comfort zone and more that she just doesn’t know Phil yet. The only confusing part of her using family titles is how she treats Tubbo, whom she is very close with but not one of her moms or someone she calls by a title (at least as often as Pac or Bad). If I were to hazard a guess on that, because she does wake up for Tubbo and Sunny something she only does for her parents, she does think of Tubbo as family. I believe it may be a more parental thinking though, maybe from Sunny being Tubbo’s kid or just that he takes care of her when her moms are away. I think she may be stepping away from refering to him as some word of dad is she does think of him that way for three possible reason; she doesn’t want her moms to be upset or feel jealous, she doesn’t want to take Sunny’s Pa from her, or she doesn’t want to overstep with him and have him stop taking care of her.

#qsmp #qsmp empanada #qsmp tubbo #qsmp phil

[wandasaura]

hi aura! i think i have mega baby fever too honestly 🙁 like ik the convo abt them and babies and marriage has died down a little but i’m sparking it back up again

so ofc we know that wandanat is older than r so i feel they’re destined to have a friend who has a child already and basically said friend asks wandanat if they could babysit and despite their busy schedule wandanat says yes cuz i mean duhh and the baby like favors r for some reason and r just eats that up they’re attached to each other all day long but no one’s complaining

i feel r would’ve had one of those summer jobs to make some extra money before university and stuff and she was probably a babysitter which is why she’s practically a natural

r would def have the baby on her lap at her computer table “teaching” them how to do cs things but it obviously fails cuz baby probably just wants to play so r and baby go to the living room and like r does that thing where u hold the baby and guide them to walk

yeah like maybe the baby is on the brink of speaking and just babbles a bunch of words and r tries to teach baby how to say some names (including her own) and words and baby ends up saying some sort of mixture of rs name somehow and baby giggles a bunch and wandanat see this and it definitely just fuels their baby fever more

especially once r and baby are worn out from playing all day r feeds baby a bottle and they end up passing out on the couch and r is protective of the baby making sure they don’t fall or anything like either baby is surrounded by rs arm or maybe baby is on rs chest

wandanat just follow r and baby everywhere around the house snapping sooo many candid photos for the future

okay that’s the end of my baby rant but i just want one so so so bad or maybe just to babysit a relatives baby soon cuz they’re all so cute

- 🦕

it’s cannon that coulson and may are together and have a little one, and they ask wandanat to babysit on a whim when they’re both called into office for a national security threat. it’s an overnight assignment and while wanda and natasha have important office things to be doing, one of the main perks about running your own company is that you’re available to help your friends when they need it. the little bean is ten months old, an age r considers the sweet spot of babyhood. they’re not just a blob that screams for milk and sleeps, but they’re not entirely mobile yet and they’re cuddly. when she finds out that the baby will be joining them for a day, she goes into mother hen mode and starts frantically picking up the living room and kitchen, making sure all the remotes are places somewhere high and that nothing fragile or sharp is within reach. the baby isn’t walking yet, but she’s cruising all tables and couches so r takes no chances about what determined little hands can reach. the candles and glass decide pieces are all locked away in a closet upstairs, and she’s pleased to find that wanda and natasha have a couple baby toys stored in the garage from when morgan was little. she turns the living room into a playroom before wanda can even come back downstairs from taking a shower.

when phil and may drop the littlest coulson off, r hangs back, not wanting to overwhelm the baby whose already upset that her parents have left. she glides around the kitchen making a snack (overly smashed blueberries and strawberries sliced to small they’re practically inedible) but she will not risk a choking hazard, so natasha doesn’t comment on the fact that the baby can eat normal sized strawberry pieces. when she does come into the living room and sits down besides wanda, whose giving the pitiful little human a bottle, she smiles so softly as she glances down at the little angel dressed in a chaotic blend of colors. she has a sneaking suspicion coulson dressed the little one and they were in too much of a hurry for may to get her redressed. the baby looks up at her and it’s literally game over after that, she reaches a hand out to r, completely transfixed on her to the point where wanda pulls the bottle away in fear that she’ll start choking. r laughs when the baby practically launches itself at her, tiny hands clapping against her cheeks as the little one babbles. they’re inseparable after that. r has the baby either on her hip, cradled to her chest, or they’re both laying on their bellies on the floor of the living room. r makes colors seem like the most interesting thing ever. she’s holding up little plastic blocks and giving full monologues about the color and what else in the world is that color. she practically kills natasha when she gets to the green block and goes, “greens the best color in the world. your aunt wanda and aunt natasha have the brightest green eyes, and sometimes they look like soft blades of grass in early spring, but sometimes, when they get all mean and scary, they look like a forest in the middle of summer that’s three seconds away from being filled with fireflies.” and the baby just drinks up every little word that r says as she chews on her fist.

a couple hours into babysitting, both wanda and natasha have things to get done in the office, and the baby is meant to be napping so they see no problem with sneaking away for a couple of hours, but at the first pitiful whine that slips through the monitor, r is going and picking them up, bouncing around the nursery as she sings a soft song that’s in no way a lullaby, but the baby doesn’t know that. she decides against sleep, and takes the baby to her office where she tries to show them about coding, but tiny hands keep banging against her keyboard and while it’s adorable, she doesn’t want to have to get another one, so she brings the baby downstairs. they have a bottle and a cuddle on the couch, and when wandanat find her again, they’re both sound asleep with a cartoon muted in the background.

when coulson and may come back for their little one, wanda and natasha are quick to offer to babysit whenever it’s needed, eager to fill their camera rolls with more pictures of the two precious girls that have wormed a way into their hearts

#yail: drabbles #yail: asks #a: anon #answered. #𝒶𝒸𝒸𝑜𝓇𝒹𝓈 ꔫ

[phanfictioncatalogue]

Domestic Fluff (2) Masterlist

2009, 2012, 2019, 2022 (ao3) - OliveTheHobbit

Summary: “Most people have like yearly photo books, we have this weird ass videos” - Daniel Howell, some bloopers from phil is not on fire 10.

Some of the memories they gathered along the way got fresh in their minds at the moment they decided to buy a photo album.

In celebration to Dan and Phil’s 10th anniversary.

adapt (ao3) - orphan_account

Summary: this is the story of how dan grew to love neon lights

A Day in the Life of Dan and Phil in Quarantine! (ao3) - silentdescant

Summary: Phil posts a Day in the Life video of a typical day in quarantine.

a room full of my safest sounds (ao3) - snsk

Summary: day five: domestic fluff

A Sleepless Night With Phil (ao3) - Not_Dans_Secret_Account

Summary: A jet-lagged Sleepless Night With Phil

baby blue and bubblegum pink (ao3) - phantasticworks

Summary: Dan paints his nails. Phil wants to try it.

Basically I’m Gay (ao3) - ChainedKura

Summary: Dan is editing his coming out video when a deep sadness takes over his body. Lucky for him, he counts with a Phil Lester on his side that will do everything in his power to make his partner feel better.

blankets, coffees and afternoon naps (ao3) - zsunsetz

Summary: Blankets, coffee and afternoon naps have become the new normal.

Coming Clean and Kisses on Screen (ao3) - hygge

Summary: Dan and Phil are finally ready to make the news of their marriage and their new family public.

Dan and Phil and DOG (ao3) - nivi_chip

Summary: It’s Phil’s birthday, and Dan gets him a gift that’s long overdue

Dan and Phil Make 'Food Stew' - The Howlter Family Edition (ao3) - gerardopoly

Summary: Dan and Phil feature their son Dil in a special episode of their "baking" series. They both had thought it would be a great way to display their relationship as a family on film, and a way to change their content up a bit. However, the roles are switched around when the couple play the sous chefs, and their son, as the head chef. Come on down and learn to make the perfect 'food stew' on this special episode of cooking with Dan and Phil (+ Dil).

Doing Nothing Often Leads To The Very Best Of Something (ao3) - kae_karo

Summary: based on this (x) and a lil imagine i wrote (x) and expanded on so thanks to the lovely anon who originally sent “that pic phil posted of dan for his bday i think where dan is making a funny face and theres a nearly empty wine bottle in the background hhhhh that makes my demon heart drop” and to the lovely anon who asked for more!

Home With A Heartbeat (ao3) - JenCollins, WordsAblaze

Summary: Uni’s hard, so sometimes Dan ends up missing lunch. This time he goes to Phil, who gives him not only worried looks, a meal, and cooking skills, but also a home.

kitchen hazards (ao3) - manchestereye (orphan_account)

Summary: dan and phil take cooking lessons, only for shit to hit the fan

Magical Healing Properties (ao3) - adorkablephil (kimberly_a)

Summary: Phil’s sick and wants his mum’s chicken soup

Night In (ao3) - antiadvil

Summary: Phil feels bad after a five second fight with his boyfriend. He is extra soft to make up for it.

security! (ao3) - natigail

Summary: Dan comes home to Phil after tour rehearsals. They cook, kiss and banter. And Dan reflects on the word "security".

the stupid sushi bubble bath fic (ao3) - itsmyusualphannie (itsmyusualweeb)

Summary: dip and pip cuddle and eat sushi and take a bubble bath like the nerds they are.

Today Is For Us (ao3) - CaibrynM

Summary: Dan and Phil take a day for themselves in between the tour ending, planning for their premiere in Brazil and the upcoming Christmas Holidays. Lots of Fluff and a little smut.

Worth the Wait (ao3) - JudeAraya

Summary: It’s pretty hard to stay mad at Phil, even when he’s forgotten date night.

#phanfictioncatalogue #phanfiction #phanfic #phan #masterlists #domestic #domestic masterlist #fluff #fluff masterlist #domesticfluff #domesticfluff masterlist

[hornet-breaker]

Hallowed Wings

Mini break from writing Wyrm Problem because Tumblr is being a butt with saving shit, how about some crow father noms since I haven’t written vore in a bit and wanna practice more descriptive writing?

Tw: soft vore, digestion thoughts, injury, car crash.

Normally in winter, animals were supposed to be hibernating, or on low energy mode. You were driving down a snowy mountain road, fresh powder making it dangerous to drive any faster than the speed limit. As you turned on a bend a deer came out from nowhere, causing you to slam your breaks. The chains on your tires struggled to keep your grip as you slid towards the guard rail, and with a loud crash you were in brief free fall before tumbling down into the wilderness…

By some miricale after a few hours you woke up, shivering and chattering your teeth, winds whistled through your broken windows, glass ground finely all around you into a hazardous glitter. You managed to unbuckle your seatbelt, blood was on your hands and cut across your forehead, you were a wreck, and at least a half mile down from the crash site. Worst of all, there was no signal and your phone was dead. You got out of the car and got on top of the roof, looking around for anything, any sign of people having been here.

Other than the trail your car left by tumbling, you were the only one here. You jump off the roof and wince, your body was sore and cut up, you needed warmth and shelter. Grabbing your jacket and a blanket from your trunk you began walking. You kept walking, and walking, and walking. You were getting more and more lost, and sleepier. No shelter, too cold, what’s that noise? You faintly heard and felt something heavy approach and the calls of what seemed to be a thousand crows, but you were too cold. Snow drifting down around your tired form and haphazardly trying to cover yourself. Something gigantic had found you…

-~-~-~-

Phil was supposed to be asleep. He slept under the bush bridges of human activity, minding his own business. The only time he got involved was when someone was severely hurt. The giant Crow heard something tumbling down the mountain, stirring from his hibernation slumber.

Probably a boulder, the crow beast thought, tucking his wings closer to his body. But then he smelled it, blood. Faintly, but it was definitely there. That’s not good.

The instinct to protect was what got him up, yawning and stretching himself out. He exited his cave for the first time in about a month and released the deer he was using for an energy stasis, drying it off and watching it sprint off. He had a feeling this poor person was going to need it. Giants had a superior sense of smell compared to humans, so it was pretty easy to track them down. Or at least their car. Phil tsked with pity, the car was definitely totaled, the engine hood was pierced and even though he couldn’t see the details he knew the car wouldn’t even start. He gently picked up the car and pocketed it, continuing his search. Crows started to gather around him, chattering and perching on his shoulders and hat, some even on his nose.

“Okay okay, what is it?” He asked, trying to hide his worry.

Some of the crows took off heading in the direction of the scent trail, Phil followed but was careful not to run. He didn’t know how much the human was bleeding, and blood tends to interfere with the specific location of a target. Phil kept his eyes on the ground, and he paused, he’d found them. They were haphazardly covered by a blanket, and losing consciousness. The crows got antsy and started to fly from Phil to them. Shit, this was no good.

Phil kneeled down to pick them up, dark feathered talons with lightly tanned skin being as gentle as possible. He picked up the blanket and put it in another pocket, and examined the person. They were definitely going to need medical attention. But the nearest town with a hospital was too far, and he couldn’t visit as a giant, that would break an ancient and sacred agreement between man and giant. So he’d have to nurse them back to health. He shifted them into his other hand and gasped softly; They were still bleeding. Without (major) hesitation he lifted them to his face and opened his mouth, careful of his fangs, and slid them in, tucking them under his tongue. Giant saliva had a special healing property during hibernation season, so he was hoping it would get under their clothes and fix the wounds beneath.

He began heading home, catching a few deer to make him and his temporary guest a quick meal. Hopefully they liked venison, or they could probably eat some vegetable shavings. He got home and the murder of curious crows dispersed, leaving him and the human alone. He felt them moving faintly in his mouth, it felt weird not swallowing them already, but there were a few things that needed to be done first to ensure both of them would be fine. He got a pot of water boiling and some vegetables he’d stored deep in the cave, which was supposed to be a snack for when spring rolled in. He could always hunt when he wakes up again, but first was getting him and the human ready for hibernation. There was no way he was just going to put them on the road, they could get run over or abducted. It was safer with him, they were pretty deep in the wilderness afterall. Phil was waiting for the water to boil as he carefully shaved the deer he caught when he felt the human wake up, shit.

Phil carefully cupped his hands around his mouth and pushed them out, feeling them slip onto his hands. He enclosed the groggy human in his hands so they wouldn’t get temperature shock and used his undershirt to dry them up of any excess saliva. This was going to be a lot to explain…

-~-~-~-

Warm. It was warm and humid wherever you were. You stirred with a grunt, and paused. Everything was dark, it smelled awful, and was wet and, squishy? Something was on top of you soaking you in liquid, what the fuck happened? You tried pushing whatever was on top of you off, and it moved. A confused and startled hum echoed around you, and the thing slid underneath you and scooped you on top. You were in a mouth. A goddamn mouth that belonged to a giant creature.

You were expecting it to swallow. To tilt its head back and enjoy a midnight snack, but instead you were sliding towards its teeth, that opened up and let some light in. It was careful letting you out, hands bigger than your car cupped around the mouth to catch you and hold you close. The hands enclosed around you as you felt faint breezes of cold snowy air slithering through the thin slits between fingers. You assumed it was trying to keep you warm.

Because a living snack wouldn’t be fun to hunt if it died to temperature shock. You thought, shivering slightly. The creature lowered you down and partially opened his hands, part of what was probably a shirt slipping in as it shifted its hands and started to try and dry you up. You took off your jacket and let it, wanting to know it’s motives.

“Are you alright mate?” The creature rumbled. “You took quite a beating.”

It-he was trying to make small talk. You stayed silent, shocked by the sheer volume.

“… Mate? Little fella? You alive down there?” He asked, sounding worried. “Hello? Tap if you can hear me.” He asked, but in your position it might as well have been a demand.

You hesitated, but when you felt him shift his hands you quickly started rapping on his finger, the thick leathery surface felt alien and made you pause. You went from near death, to being in a mouth, to now being in a pair of hands, hitting giant fingers that probably didn’t care about your feeble efforts. But somehow the hands stopped moving for a moment, registering your touch, and they lifted slowly.

“I’m going to open up my hands, okay? Brace yourself.” He said, hands stopping their lifting motion. It felt like a weird fleshy elevator. You put back on your jacket, it was still soaked but it would provide some protection from the cold.

The hands slowly opened and revealed a gigantic pale face with some midnight-black feathers along the chin, soft blue eyes staring directly at you, blonde hair, and diamond shaped markings at the corners of his eyes, like a teardrop almost. You backed up, startled by how close he was, he was unphased by your movement.

“How are you feeling?” He asked you, his voice thundering through your body. You flinched at the tone slightly, then looked back up at him.

“I, I’m okay,” you said, hugging your knees to your chest and curling up. “What are you gonna do to me?” You asked, almost quietly as if you didn’t want to know.

“Well, unfortunately you’re gonna have to stay with me for a bit, we’re miles from the closest town with a hospital, you need some rest and some food.” He said, glancing over to his right. You looked at where he was looking, a large cast iron cauldron was bubbling softly above a flame. You paled, trying to stand up.

“Whoa! Take it easy mate, you just got out of a nasty crash.” He warned, one of his fingers shot in front of you to act as a rail to balance on. “Look, I’m not gonna cook you or chew you up or anything you’re probably thinking, I just want to help you out. I’ll explain more later.”

“Are you going to eat me?” You asked. He went silent and was thinking. “… s-sir? Are you going to-“

“There’s a lot to explain regarding that, I’ll tell you more after dinner.” He finally answered in a soft voice, “can you tell me what happened? The crash?”

“… all I remember was a deer on an icy road. It jumped out of nowhere, and I swerved and slid off the guard rail. I was supposed to be home by now…” you explained.

“And then?” He asked, shifting you to a single hand so he could stand up. He lowered you towards his chest, close to his heart. The rhythmic and steady beating of the powerful organ calming you down a little.

“I woke up, and grabbed my jacket and blanket to find help.” you said. “I know, pretty stupid, but, I was so scared.”

“Well you’re fine now mate.” The giant said, checking on the pot. “Say, do you like venison?”

“I, kinda,” you answered honestly. He hummed and set you down on a rocky ledge a bit away from the cauldron. He picked some dried plants from a chest next to it and crumbled them in his hand, sprinkling them in and using a well-carved wooden spoon to stir the pot. You backed away from the giant, his pointed ear tufted with black feathers perked hearing your movement.

“Calm down, you’re fine. I won’t hurt you I already told you that.” He said gently, not even looking up. It was maybe an hour he spent watching the soup, stirring and adding things to it. Looking around the cave you saw it was very bare, there was a large pile of feathers and moss deep in the back, a few chests scattered with labels scratched onto each one, a still cave pond, and towards the mouth was the cauldron and a wooden bowl. It was a decent shelter, it was a shame he was all on his own.

“You ready to eat mate?” The giant’s voice snapped you out of your thoughts. “You need to be well fed to survive the winter.”

You looked up at him, his attention was turned to you, you were shocked to see him from this far back. He had wings, massive raven black wings folded behind his back with white diamonds on the primary feathers’ tips.

Is he like a fallen Angel? You thought, nodding your head to his question. He blinked and tilted his head in confusion.

“You’re a little too small for me to see a nod or shake but I’ll take it as a yes.” He said, lifting his hand towards you. You gasped and braced yourself to be grabbed, but you felt his clawed finger nudge you moments later. He was offering his hand for you.

You looked ups and accepted, cautiously stepping onto the soft leathery texture. He lifted his hand and lowered you to the floor next to him, closer to the fire to warm up. He filled his bowl and dipped a smaller spoon than the one he used to stir the creation into the bowl and scooped out broth, some meat, and vegetables, blowing on it and offering it to you. You looked up at him, unsure, but he gave you a gentle and patient smile. He kept saying something about surviving the winter, so that probably meant you should be trusting his cooking. Standing up, you took a sip from the broth, and melted. This was amazing as you kept drinking, the giant nudged some of the soup chunks closer to you and you grabbed a carrot, retreating and gently nibbling on it. You’ve had enough food, he could tell as he then dipped the spoon back into the bowl and lifted once again, this time opening his mouth to eat the spoonful he had. You turned away from him, not wanting to think about that.

Once he was done he put the spoon and bowl back on top of the food chest, blowing out the fire. He then lowered his hand for you, and you hopped on.

“Alright mate, now comes the hard part.” He sighed. You were now frightened, what was he talking about?

“So as you know I mentioned that we’re miles from the nearest human town. And I’m not about to terrorize a bunch of innocent humans to get you home. So, we’re going to have to wait for spring, but you’re not going to like it.” You already didn’t like what he was getting at. “Typically a giant will swallow an animal to hibernate through the winter through this process called energy stasis. You both need to be well fed and at an equal proportion of energy to each other for it to work.”

He really was going to eat you. He was only being nice for an easy dessert. You started panicking, pressing yourself away from him, was he really trying to help? He noticed your panic and looked disheartened, but shook it off quickly.

“I promise you’ll be safe mate. All giants have a crop, a storage stomach if you will. You’ll be safe and warm, the sooner we get this done the faster you can go home.” He explained. What choice did you have really? It literally was his way or the cold frozen mountain highway, and who would be out this late?

“… and you’ll let me out when you wake up?” You asked.

“Yes, I promise.” He said sincerely. Well, into the belly of the crow you went.

“O-okay, wait! Before you eat me, what’s your name?” You asked. Hopefully exchanging names would lessen the chances of you being eaten and digested.

“Mh? Oh shit I never introduced myself!” He exclaimed, his feathers puffing up a bit. “I’m Philza, and you?”

“(Y/N)” you said, reaching your hand out to shake. He lifted one of his fingers to shake.

“Alright, you ready mate?” He asked, lifting you to his mouth. Hot breath escaping his lips and warming you up. You nodded, deciding to take off your jacket and left it on his hand. He picked it up with his other hand and opened his mouth wide enough for his tongue to cover his teeth.

He tilted his hand and you slid into the wet humid cavern. This time the tongue gently rubbing against you, the roaring sound of air whooshing in and out above you just made everything so surreal. It didn’t feel natural, everything was so odd. The tongue finished lathering you up for the journey below with a quick stroke against the face. Phil hummed softly and comfortingly, tilting his head back. Oh god, it really was happening. You wanted to change your mind, it was too dark, you didn’t know where anything was or how close you were to the throat yet, you were in free fall, until you were grabbed by flesh,

Gulp!

And you were off, sliding down the tight throat with the muscular walls kneading you deeper into the beast. The loud thumping of his heart echoed around you, calming you down, and grounding you in a way. The sound of his lungs hard at work, massive air sacs whooshing with each breath, it was mesmerizing. You were slid into a sort of empty space. A fleshy pit with calmly pulsing walls. You felt Phil get up and immediately pressed yourself to a wall. You felt soft patting from behind you, and a muffled yet echoing “Shh, you’re okay,” followed by a rumbling purr. You started taking deep breaths, starting to feel sleepy. This must’ve been the energy transfer he was talking about. You slumped against the storage stomach’s walls, it was getting harder to concentrate or think, all you wanted was sleep. And so you gave yourself what you wanted, relaxing and closing your eyes. You could faintly feel Phil laying down and heard a loud exhale, a huff you guessed. Two months inside a giant’s stomach, how hard could it be to adjust?

(Filler text to prevent deletion go! Wjgievhehfjvjr hydheufjdb ehdbeocbaaaaaaaaaaaaa-)

#mcyt g/t #g/t writing #some noms #giant!philza #safe vore

[kandisheek]

FIC REC WEEK 1 – STONY FAVORITES

In Which Tony Stark Builds Himself Some Friends (But His Family Was Assigned By Nick Fury): Series by scifigrl47

Pairing: Steve/Tony, Clint/Coulson Rating: M Words: 343,010 Tags: Team as Family, Slow Burn Romance, Hilarious Banter

Reasons why I love it: If you've been in this fandom for any amount of time, you've probably read or at least heard of this series. For good reason too, because scifigrl47 created an absolute masterpiece here. It's still ongoing, so I'm only going to be commenting on the complete works, but either way this one is definitely a must-read.

This series consists of:

Some Things Shouldn't Be A Chore

Pairing: Steve/Tony, Clint/Coulson Rating: T Words: 22,187 Tags: Humor, Fluff, Sentient Toaster

Summary: Steve takes things like personal responsibility and respect seriously. Tony's got people he pays to take care of that kind of thing, and anyway, he's pretty sure that he's going to die of some exotic disease in his workshop, because Dummy's still a little spotty about what is 'clean' enough to put on an open wound. The rest of the Avengers are in this for personal gain, except for Clint, he just enjoys being a dick. And some things shouldn't be a chore.

Reasons why I love it: Aaaah Tony, my love! The characterization feels so real, the humor is top notch, and the hurt/comfort is chef's kiss! I love this fic so much, definitely give it a read!

Ordinary Workplace Hazards, Or SHIELD and OSHA Aren't On Speaking Terms

Pairing: Clint/Coulson, pre-Steve/Tony Rating: M Words: 25,992 Tags: Humor, Pre-Slash, Roomba Army of Doom

Summary: Tony Stark has once again engineered something that might well lead to the downfall of Western Civilization. No one's really surprised. This time, however, it might just be the lesser of two evils. Clint and Phil hate playing pickup, but damn, Clint loves the Roombas, and damn, Phil loves Clint, though he's not really sure why sometimes. It's time to play Hide-And-Seek with hostile robotic AIs in the SHIELD home office.

Reasons why I love it: I ship Clint/Coulson to hell and back, so I squee every time I read this one. Clint and Tony bickering while being BAMFs is always a win, and who doesn't love Coulson and Steve freaking out over their loved ones' safety? A wonderful fic laden with action and comedy, go and check it out!

Four (Or Five) Reasons for Kidnapping Tony Stark

Pairing: Steve/Tony, Clint/Coulson Rating: T Words: 78,101 Tags: BAMF Tony Stark, Kidnapping, Team as Family

Summary: There are four reasons for kidnapping Tony Stark. Tony's sick of all of them. Well, there's potentially a fifth, but it's highly unlikely that Captain America will suddenly fulfill THAT fantasy. Tony's deeply disappointed about that. Steve Rogers, as always, is oblivious. At least, that is, until someone who isn't him kidnaps Tony. Then he's just pissed.

Reasons why I love it: This is one of the first fics I read in this fandom, and it's what drew me into the whole world of Steve and Tony in the first place. I love the asymmetrical storytelling, the suspense, the drama, the angst, the humor, the resolution, all of it! The plot is so fricking creative, and the fact that all five reasons for kidnapping Tony Stark are explored in such a varied way just wows me. One of my favorite fics of all time!

Dating The Long Way Around

Pairing: Steve/Tony, Clint/Coulson Rating: M Words: 66,979 Tags: Dating, Humor, Domestic

Summary: Tony Stark was pretty sure the Universe had it out for him. Call it karma, or the natural balance, but on occasion, he had a sneaking suspicion that for every good thing that happened to him, something bad was waiting around the corner. That being the case, his first real date with Steve Rogers would probably lead to something disastrous. But in that he was, in fact, going on his first real date with Steve, he wasn't sure he cared. Steve was certain he didn't. It's a Thursday night in New York City, what can possibly go wrong?

Reasons why I love it: The team being dorks about Stony's first date? Steve being an insecure wreck? The FLIRTING?!?? Hell fucking yes to all of that!! And when the plot hits, it just takes the fic to a whole other level. I love it to bits, and I think you will too!

Things Unseen (That Are Captured on Film)

Pairing: Steve/Tony, Clint/Coulson Rating: M Words: 42,476 Tags: Fighting And Making Up, Domestic Avengers, Developing Relationship

Summary: In which the Avengers discover the video footage of Tony testing the Iron Man armor, and that goes about as well as it could be expected. Steve Rogers attempts to make peace with his lover's rather cavalier attitude to his health and safety, and starts learning more about Tony's family along the way, both the one he was born into, and the one he's chosen. And, of course, the one that's chosen him. Subtitled: It's all Clint's fault. No one is surprised.

Reasons why I love it: If you sometimes get that itch of 'oh man, I wish character x would react to that thing character z did', then this one is for you. I absolutely love the idea of everyone watching Tony's reckless tests and being appropriately horrified. Plus, the following conflict and resolution is written beautifully, so yeah, definitely give this one a read.

Hollow Your Bones Like a Bird's

Pairing: Clint/Coulson, pre-Steve/Tony Rating: M Words: 95,514 Tags: Fix-It, Teambuilding, Coulson Lives

Summary: In the wake of the Chitauri invasion, Clint Barton wakes up in a world that he very nearly had a hand in destroying. And confronting a loss he might not be able to cope with. The Avengers always needed something to avenge, but once the crisis is past, what keeps them together?

Reasons why I love it: Ladies and gents and my non-binary friends, we've got angst! Clint's struggles are so visceral that I get completely sucked into the fic, no matter how many times I read it. It's heart-breaking and lovely in equal measure, and the resolution is worth all the pain. Clint is one of my favorite characters, so the way his trauma is explored in this fic is just incredible to me. Definitely, DEFINITELY check this one out!

#marvel #stony #fanfic #fic rec #fanfiction recommendation #a year in fanfic recs

[tokiro07]

Undead Unluck ch.155 thoughts

[Stowaways]

This just might be the outright funniest chapter in Undead Unluck’s run, not necessarily because any of the jokes on their own outshine the previous funniest moments, but because there are just so damn many

Nico puking from the zero-gravity training in the background, Sean running off crying with a pun on his name (”chikuShon” or “damnaSean”), Sean thinking that Gina is interested in him only for her to just move on with the conversation, Gina telling him to make his weight appear to be zero and thinking she’s telling him to die, Sean calling Gina a liar when she says everything went as she planned, Nico’s expression when he sees the stowaways, and of course, the piece-de-resistance: Gina’s face when she realizes that she has no plan

Tozuka has definitely proven that he knows how to get a good laugh, but this chapter makes me think he could probably carry an entire gag manga if he wanted to, perhaps something along the lines of Saiki Kusuo or Magu-chan. I don’t generally like gag series, but Tozuka has more than earned my faith as a reader, so if I heard his next series would be a gag manga, I’d be on board with his sense of humor

I don’t think there’s really too much to say about this chapter that others haven’t already said: Sean and Gina make a surprisingly fun duo, and the two of them insisting on joining the team even if it means defying orders makes a lot of sense for their characters. Sean’s need to stand in the spotlight and desire to have a place to belong were evident in the previous loop when he defied Rip’s orders and got himself killed, so of course now that there’s the opportunity for a mission as unique as going into space he’d want to be a part of it, especially when you consider that he only just joined the group midway through the previous mission. Now that he feels like he’s found his tribe, being left out so quickly would naturally feel reminiscent of the rejections he’s so used to receiving already, as if he’s immediately fallen back into his old patterns. It’s an inferior complex, plain and simple, and the timing of a mission that he’s not suited for just makes it harder for him to grow past those feelings

Gina, on the other hand, has always been the jealous type, easily swayed and motivated by her own emotions. She wants to be the most important person in the eyes of her most important person; it’s how she was with Andy in Loop 100, and it’s how she is now with Fuuko. She understands and appreciates that Fuuko wants her to recover from the strain of the previous mission, but she’s also let it get to her head that she’s technically the most powerful Negator in the Union (not counting Billy’s ability to copy her powers), so she won’t trust anyone else with protecting Fuuko when she knows that no one is as capable as her. Unfortunately, because she was still recovering and clearly isn’t the type to consider all of the factors, her condition is almost certainly going to catch up to her over the course of this mission, and that is going to necessitate that she grow and change from her current, arguably bratty mindset

I imagine that this is going to end up being related to or centered around Sean, as we’ve already had it foreshadowed that he’s going to get flung out into space during this mission. Fuuko’s fear was that Sean’s ability would change without anyone knowing it, and that’s exactly what’s come to pass- he’s gained the ability to trick the senses of machinery, meaning that the infrared goggles likely won’t work on him anymore. How Gina’s growth might play into saving him, I’m not sure, as it’s not like Unchange can work on the nothingness of space, right?

I guess she might save him as he’s about to fly out of the ship, perhaps making his suit Unchanging so that it stays in place or something to that effect? I don’t really want to hazard a guess, as I’ve been known to be wrong pretty often

It’s also possible that Phil’s Unfeel will somehow be relevant to saving Sean, but again, I’m going to keep my mouth shut for now

Speaking of being wrong, last week I said I was worried Sean wouldn’t get much more focus going forward, so I’m really glad to see that I’ve been proven wrong so quickly. I’m still not convinced everyone is going to get this much attention, but I’m really endeared to Sean, so I’m happy to see him getting worked into the story when it seemed like he was going to kind of fade back into the background

My biggest worry right now is that the extra weight on the ship will somehow cause damage or otherwise be the reason that something goes wrong. Gina and Sean didn’t get the necessary training, and Gina didn’t even secure herself and Sean in the cargo bay with Unchange, so I’m quite confident that whatever goes wrong will technically be her fault

Still, it’ll all work out, it’s not like anyone’s going to die, so while there’s definitely going to be drama like with Nico almost getting hit by Disk, I’m sure that this space arc is going to be a ton of fun overall. Looking forward to it!!!

#undead unluck #fouryearsandananime #4y1a reviews

[themculibrary]

Ceiling Vent Clint Barton Masterlist

Caught In A Net (ao3) - ShippersList clint/phil T, 1k

Summary: When Clint started roaming the vents, he didn't exactly expect to stumble upon Coulson's office. What a delightful coincidence.

Clint Barton's Guide to Friends and Ceiling Vents (ao3) - NoliteTimereEos clint/natasha T, 6k

Summary: In which Clint Barton meets a missing assassin in the vents and somehow becomes friends with him. Things don't go as bad as they could have.

Clint Barton's Super Secret Snipers' Club (ao3) - sara_holmes clint/bucky, steve/tony T, 67k

Summary: Clint Barton's Super Secret Snipers' Club. (Invitation and pending mental health evaluation required.)

"When Steve brings Bucky back to the tower for the first time, Clint’s first thought is that Tony Stark’s pride and joy is quickly becoming a less of a very tall and expensive ‘fuck you’ in the faces of investors who don’t believe in self-sustaining energy, and more of a superhero rehabilitation center."

Boyfriends, compromises and learning to like oneself.

Furious Fury and the Interrupting Intern (ao3) - Stella_Malodi nick/darcy G, 1k

Summary: Darcy's trying to find the cafeteria; somehow, she finds her Soulmate instead. (She really should've known better than to ask Clint "The Ventilation System Is My Highway" Barton for directions.)

Darcy had no sense of direction. This could be a problem when she was trying to find her way around SHIELD headquarters, especially since SHIELD agents were apparently horrible at giving step-by-step directions. Because, seriously? “Follow this hallway for five hundred feet, then turn North.” She wasn’t carrying a compass! And how was she supposed to know how far five hundred feet actually was?

Left in the Cold (fanfiction.net) - Nightcrawler's Shadow pepper/tony T, 2k

Summary: Clint doesn't like the cold, Tony needs to know why. The answer may not be what he expected. Bro!vengers, NO SLASH. tiny sprinkle of Pepperony. Rated for mentions of abuse.

Lucky Pennies (ao3) - IamShadow21 clint/phil G, 6k

Summary: In Clint Barton's official SHIELD file, there is a supplemental form with a string of letters and numbers indicating a superhuman ability. On it, there are two pieces of information. The first is 'Asset-Reported Ability (unverified)'. The second is 'Combat/Field Applicable Ability Y/N'. 'N' is circled.

Making The Best Of It (ao3) - dentalfloss clint/phil T, 33k

Summary: “He’s not telling us everything,” Fury reached out and shut the projection off, “I’m not comfortable with this.” Coulson didn’t respond, didn’t need to. “Let Rogers know I want Barton watched; he doesn’t go anywhere alone until we understand exactly what’s going on. I’m not losing him to some egotistical mind-f***ing blade-dancer who has mentor issues and wants to take it out on our asset.”

Phil nodded efficiently. He couldn’t agree more.

My Birdy (ao3) - GayRainbowBridge tony/clint T, 1k

Summary: Clint acts a bit like a bird and Tony finds it adorable but frustrating.

On Nesting (ao3) - snack_size clint/phil M, 5k

Summary: Clint moves into Avengers Tower, and promptly takes up residence in the air ducts, including the one above Bruce's lab. It soon becomes clear that this isn't just a cracky, quirky behavior.

Ordinary Workplace Hazards, Or SHIELD and OSHA Aren't On Speaking Terms (ao3) - scifigrl47 clint/phil, steve/tony M, 25k

Summary: Tony Stark has once again engineered something that might well lead to the downfall of Western Civilization. No one's really surprised. This time, however, it might just be the lesser of two evils.

Clint and Phil hate playing pickup, but damn, Clint loves the Roombas, and damn, Phil loves Clint, though he's not really sure why sometimes. It's time to play Hide-And-Seek with hostile robotic AIs in the SHIELD home office.

Pavlov was a Jerk (ao3) - BeneficialAddiction clint/phil E, 77k

Summary: Clint Barton: World's Greatest Marksman, submissive, high-functioning disaster.

When Clint comes in to SHIELD he's been on his own for almost four years, and he's been keeping himself level using conditioning techniques he's learned from a lifetime of abuse and neglect. Phil Coulson is the first to notice the imbalance – Clint's system seems to be all punishment, no rewards - but Phil's tastes aren't exactly average and it's none of his business anyway. Certain that what he wants is not at all congruent with what Clint deserves Phil keeps his distance, until a mission gone wrong sends the archer tumbling into an nasty case of subdrop and neither of them have any other choice but to take a chance on the other.

That Awkward Moment When Your Whole Class Shows Up At Your House (ao3) - MurdockSchmurdock T, 25k

Summary: After May tells Midtown High about an injury Peter sustained in a Spider-man incident, he is more than content to spend the next few weeks "recuperating" at Stark/Avengers Tower. It seems the universe has other plans, however, and Peter ends up being swept into his class's field trip. At Stark Tower. Wonderful.

That One Time Clint Lived in the Vents at Stark Tower for Three Months and No One Knew (ao3) - Era_Penn tony/clint T, 4k

Summary: Tony was pretty sure there was a ghost living out its afterlife in his kitchen. He thought it must have moved in approximately two Thursdays ago, and it seemed to really enjoying cooking - especially Italian - and crappy Chinese takeout. It also seemed to be very friendly, as it always left a note that said something along the lines of ‘for my generous host’ or ‘leftovers are Tony’s, NO ONE EAT’ on top of the food.

The Things You See (fanfiction.net) - DepressingGreenie steve/tony T, 605

Summary: Clint catches Steve and Tony making out.

Watching over you (ao3) - Ruquas

Summary: He didn‘t even mean to make it a habit at first. He just wanted to make sure that Pietro was okay. Just like with Phil the first time the other man had been hurt on a mission. Or Natasha. Or Tony. Or any other member of the team. He even had slept above Steve’s quarter a few nights, and he was a super soldier.

Welcome Home (ao3) - CarlyWrites wanda/vision T, 57k

Summary: Wanda arrives at the new Avenger's facility in New York and struggles to find her place among the team while dealing with the consequences of her actions following Ultron. However, her newfound family is quickly shaken to its core when one of their own is seriously injured. Part 1 of the Natasha and Wanda Series Not CACW Compliant

Where Spider-man is Not Having a Good Time and Neither is Anyone Else (ao3) - Guessthisiswhat N/R, 13k

Summary:Stark Expo, May 2010 14 kids go missing in the attack. Only one found alive.

May 2016 Peter Parker escapes the compound he's been in for the last six years.

August 2016 Spider-man makes his first appearance.

Or Peter Parker was kidnapped by Hydra at the Stark Expo in 2010 and was never reported missing because Aunt May and Uncle Ben died in the attack. Six years later he has escaped and now takes up the Spider-man persona. Leading the Avengers to be tracking him down, all while he is homeless.

You See, It Was Like This (ao3) - WriteItSmall (scribblemyname) G, 100

Summary: "Why is Agent Barton hiding in the vent above your desk?"

#themculibrary #masterlists #marvel #mcu #clint barton #ceiling vent clint #ceiling vent clint masterlist

[trenchcoatsbi]

JUMPS IN EXCITMENEF LETS GOOO

Do you have any stories you like to tell Phil and/or do any anons have favorite stories ? - Roier

OH OH OH!!! gonna be honest the whole uh reply I made to 🐣 with the stuff about like sticking together and stuff was all just stuff I've been thinking about cause of one of my canons. I don't wanna bore yall explaining lore so I am just going to gush about my friends because they are all so silly and I miss them dearly. I may come back and ramble off more stories in a sec too.

ANYWAY hi so my best friend and I met trying to save people from uh lets just call em barons! I was going to help a kid I met earlier that day and he was trying to get his parents and we kinda just ended up fighting together (<- i beat everyone up and got his parents out of there and he saved the family of the kid I was helping out while I was doing that) He invited me to his little resistance group after that and we did a lot of punching up against the bastards who were always making life where we were hell >:D!

It was a lot of planning and stuff which kinda was ugh I wasnt great with planning my style was just get in, cause problems, and then get out. But we also goofed off a lot we were barely adults and I wasn't big on being serious so I dragged the others into silly things all the time! I dragged them to festivals and little neighborhood parties and stuff, you gotta remember what we're fighting for yknow?

Uhm uhm idk a lot of my memories are based on the politics and the stuff we were doing and the goofy stuff is a bit less easy to talk about without a lot of me going on rants but I'm just gonna rattle off some more things under the cut

Ekko

EKKO!!!! RAHGHG this guy!! He's my bestie don't listen to him if he says otherwise we're the bestest friends he's just shy.

He never let me in his little lab >:/ To be fair I was an awful safety hazard haha electricity magic plus technology he was working on wasn't ggreat but i was always curious about his work i used to sneak in by which I mean I would just go in and stand around while he pretended not to see me

Me and Ez used to drag him around a lot he wasn't like an introvert but he was always working, he was the big leader of the rebellion stuff so he was always serious. He was so funny though, making him laugh was like the best feeling in the world.

He used to help me fix my gun and my coat and all that! (aka every time I broke everything he would be one of the one's I could always turn to to fix it) i used tech to help regulate the fact that I was always sparking lol I was like a live wire and it helped people not get hurt around me

Ezrael

EZRA!!! EZ!! EZA!! Him and me were so silly! I think it's so funny him and Ekko were friends, ekko just showed up with him at our base like he picked Ez up off the street.... stray golden retriever vibes...

He accidentally gave me coffee instead of tea once and I was so hyped up I ended up shocking the hell out of him with my magic... I also crashed a bike... and maybe almost blew up our entire base... Safe to say I was banned from coffee forever and Ekko scolded us so bad...

He wasn't from town he was from the richer upperclass area, but he got absorbed into out group so quickly. He was a bastard but he was our bastard and he's my silly goose [Honorable mention to Vi and cait!! i will always say acab!!! but they were cool after they uh stopped being basically cops!!]

I liked stealing his jacket... not even like to wear it cause mine was the one with my regulators in it but just because he always would chase me around to get it back and i thought it was funny lol

Sera

ughg i know why people don't like her like in terms of game stuff but I miss her so bad :((( she did leave town and was like moving up in life and stuff when her music career started really getting serious but she used to help me and ekko kinda? she would use her music to help out where possible

She wasn't part of the active fighting like me an ek but she was great for morale! music building community and all that. I miss her singing so bad it was so comforting on bad days after a job went wrong.. even after she left i used to listen to her music on my little disc player that ekko made me

I used to help her dye her hair! or really just idk i'd take any excuse to hang out and have a girls night with her.

Sometimes she let me help with her guitar and stuff sometimes too!!! I was awful with tech, I could use it, just couldn't wrap my head around building it so really i would just hold stuff for her and ask her a million questions about how it worked! still was fun i could listen her talk about things all day!

#phil posts #sbi asks #wow phil's one nonmcyt kin is showing... /j #i was gonna like tell stories proper but I got possessed and I just wanted to talk lmao #that moment when you kinshift lol

[motownfiction]

third floor

Sam moves out of his parents’ house in October of ‘89. He’s the last of the Doyle siblings to move away. Sadie moved out last year when she got married; Charlie moved out last month for the same reason. And then there’s Sam. Terminal twenty-two-year-old bachelor Sam. He could stay in his childhood bedroom forever. Except he doesn’t want to.

He’s spent the last two years saving up as much money as he can. The only reason he took the marketing job at his dad’s landscaping business was so that he’d make enough to save up for his own place one day. When he left that job for the gig at the record store, Dad was heartbroken. It hurt Sam something awful to see him like that. Head hung low, talking about how he was going to miss him. He meant it, too. Sam and his old man have always gotten on like Han and Chewbacca, Phil and Don before the split. Today, they harmonize “Bye Bye Love” as they move Sam up to his new apartment in the city, on the third floor. Mom’s lagging behind with a very tall floor lamp.

“I don’t understand why you had to move to Detroit proper,” she says as she stumbles into Sam’s new living room, lamp first.

“Just had to,” Sam says. “Better to say I did. Can’t be a suburban rat my whole life, can I?”

His mother makes a face like she just bashed her knee against the coffee table. Maybe she did. Sam can’t say he’s been paying close attention. His father walks around and puts his arm around her.

“Maggie, come on,” he says. “You really don’t want him to stick too close forever, do you?”

Sam watches as his mother frowns. He doesn’t know what she’s thinking, not really, but he thinks he can hazard a guess. Mom left the city when she realized she couldn’t be an actress … when she realized she was pregnant with him (and Sadie, but when she’s worried about her ego, then it’s all about how she got pregnant with Sam). She walks up to him and takes his face in her hand, just like when he was a kid.

“I just gave you all of my talent,” she says. “Mike, didn’t I? Didn’t I just give this boy all of my talent?”

“What talent?” Sam laughs. “I can’t sing. I can’t really act. I think I can dance, but that might be my absurdly high confidence talking.”

Mom tightens her grip on his face once more before letting go.

“You know what talent,” she says.

Sam doesn’t say anything. He knows.

That’s why he’s moving to Detroit proper, after all.

He and his folks get the last of everything in. Before they turn around and head back home, Mom looks around the place and holds in a cry. Sam knows she means it, too. She’s not that great of an actress. That’s why she’s his mom.

“I’m just … what am I supposed to do without a kid in the house?” she asks.

“Eh, Mom, you’ll figure something out,” Sam says. “One-woman shows.”

He motions to his father on the other side of her.

“One-man audiences.”

Mom laughs, and Dad puts his arm around her again. Sam locks his eyes with his father for a little while. He can’t really hear what Dad is thinking, but he swears he can feel what he’s feeling. Pride. Nervousness. Maybe a little guilt. Sam pretends like he doesn’t know what the guilt would be for.

“Oh, Sam,” Mom says. “What am I going to do without you?”

Sam doesn’t say anything. He just wonders. Is this when she’ll finally realize? When she’ll finally realize he was her ally? Sam is pretty sure he understands his mother better than anyone else in his family. More than Dad, more than Sadie, even more than Charlie. Mom is an artist in a way they don’t make artists anymore. He thinks about those old photographs of hers he found when she was ten … how he loved his little mother in them, how he wished he could have known her then. Maybe then she wouldn’t think he was a thief. Maybe then they wouldn’t look at each other like there’s a changing screen between them.

“I don’t know, Mom,” he finally says. “But I guess I’ll see you tomorrow.”

She smiles to keep from crying. Sam knows she means it, too. He did steal her talent, after all.

He looks down at his hands in his new third-floor apartment, and he knows it.

(part of @nosebleedclub january challenge -- day xxiv!)

#drabble #writeblr #ch: sam doyle #ch: maggie doyle #ch: mike doyle #year: 1989 #this should be better! i'm just busy!

[walkswithmyfather]

“And I am certain that God, who began the good work within you, will continue his work until it is finally finished on the day when Christ Jesus returns.” —Philippians 1:6 (NLT)

“I look up to the mountains and hills, longing for God’s help. But then I realize that our true help and protection is only from the Lord, our Creator who made the heavens and the earth. He will guard and guide me, never letting me stumble or fall. God is my keeper; he will never forget nor ignore me. He will never slumber nor sleep; he is the Guardian-God for his people, Israel. Yahweh himself will watch over you; he’s always at your side to shelter you safely in his presence. He’s protecting you from all danger both day and night. He will keep you from every form of evil or calamity as he continuously watches over you. You will be guarded by God himself. You will be safe when you leave your home, and safely you will return. He will protect you now, and he’ll protect you forevermore!” —Psalm 121:1‭-‬8 (TPT)

“For the eyes of the Lord range throughout the earth to strengthen those whose hearts are fully committed to him.” —2 Chronicles 16:9a (NIV)

“How precious are your thoughts about me, O God. They cannot be numbered! I can’t even count them; they outnumber the grains of sand! And when I wake up, you are still with me!” —Psalm 139:17‭-‬18 (NLT)

There isn't a moment of the day when you're not on God's mind and He thinks countless thoughts about you (Jer 29:11, Ps 139:17-18). He knows where you are right now and He loves you far too much to leave you as you are and where you are.

God is ALWAYS working all things in you and around you for your good (Phil 1:6, Rom 8:28).

No, it isn't all plain sailing. This is not an easy journey we're on. There are hazards everywhere in this sinful, fallen world. There will be storms, mountains, pitfalls, temptations and many other things to negotiate; but through them all, God is with you and He is working. God neither slumbers nor sleeps (Ps 121:4) and all the time He's weaving details into wonders.

“God, who began the good work within you, will continue His work until it is finally finished on the day when Christ Jesus returns.” (Phil 1:6)

By the time God is finished, you and your life will not be the same as now. Everything will be better. More blessings, more peace, more wisdom - better as only God can make things.

Friend, God didn't bring you this far to leave you! Remember that when the going gets tough. God is with you, He is mighty to save and He is faithful. Amen! 🙌

#psalm 121:1‭ ‬8 #2 chronicles 16:9 #psalm 139:17‭ ‬18 #bible #christian blog #god #belief in god #faith in god #bibletranslations #biblequotes #jesus #belief in jesus #faith in jesus #encouragement #christianblog #christian quotes #christian life #christians #christianity #christian inspiration #bible verses #bible truths #keep the faith #make him known #god thinks of you #god didn't bring you this far to leave you #philippians 1:6

[wobblewokgaming]

Akane Hasegawa has the Omnitrix AU

@smolstarthief, here's some more stuff for the whole Akane having the Omnitrix thing!

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Okay, so this takes place after the Omnitrix finally times out. Naturally, everyone is still in disbelief with everything that had just occurred. So, in order to relax, everyone makes s'mores. And for a moment, it starts to work.

Then, the Omintrix times back in. Akane, out of curiosity begins to examine it in more detail. She did what she did last time in order to bring the dial of the Omnitrix up, and instead of simply pressing it, she twisted it and began to scroll through the varying aliens it had, with Zenkichi telling her what species each one was.

While she had what seemed like millions of aliens on the watch, but Zenkichi told her to stick to ten for now and to try out some more later, once she had gotten the hang of the thing. So, she picks the following Aliens;

Conductoid (Feedback), Orishan (Water Hazard), Methanosian (Swampfire), Lepidopterran (Stinkfly), Appoplexian (Rath), Galvanic Mechamorph (Upgrade), Cerebrocrustacean (Brainstorm), Sonorosian (Echo Echo), Loboan (Blitzwolfer) and Kineceleran (XLR8).

During the first few weeks of Summer, Akane starts training with the aliens, so she could easily use them if she was to ever get into a scuffle with someone of alien origin.

As you'd expect, she comes across a bunch of maniacal super villains/villainesses. Dr. Animo, Zombozo and his Circus Freaks, Vilgax's Mechadroids. The works. But there are also some newcomers;

Kajima Kyushu: basically this AU's version of Kevin E. Levin. She's gonna be Akane's main rival/sometimes partner/eventual friend. Becomes incredibly flustered around Akane's cousin.

Maho Hasegawa: Akane's cousin, this AU's version of Gwen Tennyson (except Maho's a guy). Maho and Akane are much more buddy-buddy rather than antagonistic. "Dweeb" and "doofus" are terms of endearment between the two. He crushes hard on Kajima.

Eien Driscoll: Adoptive son of Forever King Driscoll. An alien/human hybrid (much like Kajima) who was adopted by Driscoll, the Forever King plans on using Eien's powers for the benefit of the Forever Knights. He's also Akane's love interest.

Yeah, quite a bit of newcomers, eh? And for those who know who the Forever King is, you can probably guess who Akane's gonna be fighting for the majority of her Summer Vacation.

______________________________________________________________

Characters that are important;

Zenkichi Hasegawa:

Before Zenkichi retired, he was of the level of Magister among the Plumbers. For those who don't know, Magister/Magistra is the second highest rank in the Plumber ranking system, with it being right under the title Magistratus and Magistrata. Once Akane has the Omnitrix, he comes out of retirement.

Zenkichi was partners with Max Tennyson, Patelliday, Phil Billings, Aoi (she was a Magistra), Xylene and a Celestialsapien Gladiator who went by the name Galaxia Starlight.

Before Aoi and Zenkichi were a thing, Galaxia and Zenkichi were romantically involved.

Later on the two have a reunion, with Galaxia mourning the loss of her friend and vowing to eradicate Owada if they were to ever cross paths.

Eventually, the two hit it off again, and Akane gets a badass stepmom.

______________________________________________________________

Yuuki Mishima

In this AU, Yuuki is the youngest person to ever become a Magister in the Plumbers

He's in an unwilling relationship with Looma Red Wind. Somehow, he beat her and she has been sending him Tetramand Gifts 24/7.

Teaches the Phantom Thieves the ropes during their training in Plumbers Academy (yes, I'm making the Phantom Thieves official members of the Plumbers, don't even @ me).

He entered the Plumbers Academy two years ago (like, a few weeks after the whole Kamoshida thing came to a close).

Yuuki is one of the few humans who can causally make conversation with Azmuth. What starts as a simple conversation becomes a storm of hypotheses and theories.

______________________________________________________________

Eien Driscoll

His relationship with Forever King Driscoll is akin to Hunter and Belos from the Owl House. The Forever King simply sees Eien as means to an end rather than a person.

Eien is a human/Fulmini [Full-Min-Eye] (Shock Rock) hybrid. He has a human appearance but can actively transform into a full Fulmini form whenever he gets too emotional.

When he finally reaches an equilibrium, his body takes on features of both a human and a Fulmini.

He has an intense fear of failure (Daddy Driscoll gives out some rather serious "punishments" if Eien does fail).

He's socially awkward, has only heard about the outside world through the news, old movies and old cartoons.

Was told that his parents died in a freak accident that totally wasn't caused by the Forever King.

Will geek out over monsters for hours if you let him. He likes them because he was always told that he himself was one by Driscoll he thinks they're cool.

Is desperate for love and affection. Can't tell when it's fake.

*slaps car hood* This boy can fit so much trauma in him!

But seriously, the poor boy needs a bunch of hugs and kisses A, S, A and P.

______________________________________________________________

Kajima Kyushu

She's an Osmosian, a species of humanoid aliens that have the ability to absorb DNA.

If you watch Ben 10 as a kid, you probably know how this all plays out.

When Akane hears her (Kajima) say "they haven't had the chance to make fun of me yet", I imagine that her heart would break in two.

Everyone's reaction to her Amalgam form could basically be summed up to the term "what the fuck".

Is an open pervert when it comes to Maho, much to Akane's annoyance.

She learns to absorb minerals and alloys during her time with the Phantom Thieves. And even later on, she learns that she can shift her body parts into weapons once she does this.

Soon, she joins Team Hasegawa and the Phantom Thieves after being convinced by Maho.

______________________________________________________________

Maho Hasegawa

As mentioned before, Maho is Akane's cousin.

Maho can be described in a few words; cute, kindhearted, hardheaded (to an extent) and somewhat protective.

Maho admires the Phantom Thieves like Akane, but to a lesser extreme.

When Maho first meets Kajima, he felt like he had been struck by a cupids arrow 20 times.

Much like in the Prime Timeline with Gwen, Maho finds one of the Charms of Bezel (the one that grants him incredible luck) and starts to go by the name Lucky Boy.

This causes Hex and Charmcaster to enter the story.

After fighting and defeating Hex, Maho becomes interested in actual magic and starts to study it profusely. Also, yes, Maho is an Anodite.

______________________________________________________________

Hope y'all enjoy this overtly long post.

#Persona 5 #akane hasegawa #zenkichi hasegawa #the phantom thieves #yuuki mishima #ben 10 #omnitrix

[qtubbo]

Tubbo calling Dapper his second favorite egg got me thinking about Creation's shell ranking. I wonder if we're ever going to find out the order, if there is one, and if there is any time travel connection I wonder when the ranks were set. Also are they set ranks or do factors like number of lives remaining affect it? Tubbo himself changes favorites depending on who he's talked to most recently. It's always genuine but at the same time doesn't mean much with how often it changes.

Tubbo always tells who he’s talking to that they’re his second favorite (Sunny of course stays in first at all times unless he forgets) which is probably due to having a close connection to his irl fam and siblings. The creation egg ranking is interesting because how is it determined? Obviously Sunny is at the top but after that we really have to guess, my thoughts is Em may currently be in second with how much Tubbo talks about her only having one life, and how he should be protecting her.

If I were to hazard a guess I think it’s a combo of emotional importance and active danger. We really just have to try to guess off of how he talks about the eggs, like for example I think Tallulah might be higher then Chay because Tubbo seems to think if Phil had to choose it would Chay. There may also be a preprogrammed calculation system where there is a literal point value assigned to each egg based on how much they need to be protected times Tubbo’s focus on them. So the list can actively change around depending on outside effects.

#qsmp #Qsmp creation #qsmp tubbo #asks!

[ao3feed-crimeboys]

A Real Fun Time All Around

by Vivid_Violet

In a world of heroes and villains, there will always be people that fall in the gray. Vigilantes, antiheroes, mercenaries all existed in this world. The latter of those are always the most sought after by both sides, though one tries to keep it quiet. This sought after position is something many have held, but none were quite as known as the ones of which our story follows. The mercenaries we’ll be looking into are six that go by the name of the Hazard Crew.

Or: Hero/Villain AU with bench trio+purpled+lani+drista as mercenaries

Or or: Found family later on and a whole bunch of interesting things

Words: 2798, Chapters: 1/20, Language: English

Fandoms: Dream SMP, Minecraft (Video Game)

Rating: General Audiences

Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings

Categories: Gen

Characters: TommyInnit (Video Blogging RPF), Toby Smith | Tubbo, Technoblade (Video Blogging RPF), Phil Watson | Philza, Wilbur Soot, Niki | Nihachu, Jack Manifold, Grayson | Purpled (Video Blogging RPF), Clay | Dream's Sister Drista (Video Blogging RPF), Clay | Dream (Video Blogging RPF), GeorgeNotFound (Video Blogging RPF), Sapnap (Video Blogging RPF), Darryl Noveschosch | BadBoyHalo, Eret (Video Blogging RPF)

Relationships: Wilbur Soot & Technoblade & TommyInnit & Phil Watson, Wilbur Soot & TommyInnit, Technoblade & TommyInnit (Video Blogging RPF), Toby Smith | Tubbo & TommyInnit, Ranboo & TommyInnit (Video Blogging RPF), Grayson | Purpled & TommyInnit (Video Blogging RPF)

Additional Tags: Fluff, Angst, Author is bad at tagging, My first fic, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Sleepy Bois Inc as Found Family, later on tho

#ao3feed #wilbur soot #tommyinnit #crimeboys #crime boys #crimebois #crime bois #mcyt #This is an automated process #If you see any fic that breaks boundaries #or the fic is yours and you don't want it shared send an ask #it will be looked at and removed if need be

[phanfictioncatalogue]

Cooking Masterlist

All I Wanted For Christmas This Year Was You (ao3) - orphan_account

Summary: Dan and Phil are having a Christmas party and get a little distracted along the way

A sight for sore eyes (ao3) - HeartSkipStyles

Summary: Dan teases Phil whilst they're cooking in the kitchen.

a room full of my safest sounds (ao3) - snsk

Summary: day five: domestic fluff

Dan and Phil Make 'Food Stew' - The Howlter Family Edition (ao3) - gerardopoly

Summary: Dan and Phil feature their son Dil in a special episode of their "baking" series. They both had thought it would be a great way to display their relationship as a family on film, and a way to change their content up a bit. However, the roles are switched around when the couple play the sous chefs, and their son, as the head chef. Come on down and learn to make the perfect 'food stew' on this special episode of cooking with Dan and Phil (+ Dil).

Don't start fires, darling (ao3) - natigail

Summary: Phil wanted to expand his and Dan's repertoire of dishes, so they didn't need to live off of stir-fry and delivery. He thought that cooking lessons would be an awesome way to do that and have a fun date activity. The people in the restaurant do not agree but he and Dan find the humour in it.

EXTREME TRIPLE CHOCOLATE NESTS (ao3) - orphan_account

Summary: Dan and Phil cook some Easter nests.

Home With A Heartbeat (ao3) - JenCollins, WordsAblaze

Summary: Uni’s hard, so sometimes Dan ends up missing lunch. This time he goes to Phil, who gives him not only worried looks, a meal, and cooking skills, but also a home.

Jealousy in a Less Obvious Form (ao3) - razortotherozary

Summary: Phil looked at his door briefly and then back at the camera. "Also," he said, pausing for a few seconds and taking another big breath. "I'm in love with someone. Though, they don't know it." Phil looked slightly sad in this moment, glancing at the ground. "And they'd hate me forever if they found out."

kitchen hazards (ao3) - manchestereye (orphan_account)

Summary: dan and phil take cooking lessons, only for shit to hit the fan

Magical Healing Properties (ao3) - adorkablephil (kimberly_a)

Summary: Phil’s sick and wants his mum’s chicken soup

Night In (ao3) - antiadvil

Summary: Phil feels bad after a five second fight with his boyfriend. He is extra soft to make up for it.

Of Cats and Smoke Alarms (ao3) - thatsformetoknow

Summary: In which Dan is the neighbour that keeps setting off the smoke alarm in the building and Phil is the neighbour that offers to give him cooking lessons, tired of his Buffy marathons and sleep schedules being messed up. Throw in a few house plants and Dan's cat that Phil happens to be completely in love with, if a little allergic to, and love is sure to blossom, right?

pancakes (ao3) - howelllesters

Summary: Dan tries to make Phil breakfast in bed. Instead he just makes a mess of the kitchen, Phil’s pyjamas, and his own hand.

ready to cook with fire (ao3) - CapriciousCrab

Summary: That time when unwanted cooking lessons end up being the best gift ever

security! (ao3) - natigail

Summary: Dan comes home to Phil after tour rehearsals. They cook, kiss and banter. And Dan reflects on the word "security".

the sanctity of fajitas (ao3) - kishere

Summary: prompt: dan and phil cook something without the recipe, because phil is confident they know how to cook it from memory

The whisk fic (ao3) - BREAD2000yeet

Summary: dan and phil get down with a whisk

Yes, Chef (ao3) - letspartyrightnow

Summary: Dan is really into his cooking lessons. And other things.

#phanfictioncatalogue #phanfiction #phanfic #phan #masterlists #cooking #cooking masterlist

[commaclear]

[she took the kids au] -- so about four to five months after fundy "left",,, a lot changed. wilbur now worked from home. techno came by often, he never really spoke about work, he made sure to leave out fundy especially in conversation. wilbur spends his day either in his bed working, playing a pretty acoustic guitar quackity had bought him for their anniversary. sometimes tommy comes and plays video games with him after school. he likes life now,,, well as much as you can when 4/7 days a week you cry yourself to sleep. quackity always stops by 2 or 3 days to spend the night. sometimes they watch a movie and cuddle,, other times a little more than that. one morning the two wake up, smiling tiredly and exchanging heavenly soft kisses. "mmm,,, wil, its Monday,," "cant you call in a sub?" "I gotta save those days for emergencies,,," quackity kissed wilburs forehead. "slimes over at karls this week,,, so I can come Tuesday night how about that?" wilbur thought for a second like he had an actual schedule, "yeah that sounds nice," he sat up and grabbed quackitys phone to give him, "we can meet at the bar, maybe catch a movie!" he suggested "I love that!" quackity tied his tie and folded up the pajamas he wore last night.

the two walked out the house and over to quackitys car, wilbur missing the concerned look from his brother and phil. Quackity buckled in his car and spoke to wilbur causally about their Wednesday night plans. "so 5 sounds good?" quackity whispered to wilbur

"yeah, thats good with me." wilbur smiled and leaned closer to quackity

"maybe dress up a lil bit, you could wear that shirt I always like,,," quackity drew closer and closer towards wilbur and stared at his lips. "you gonna give me a goodbye kiss or,,,?" wilbur smiled and quackity kissed him lovingly the two pulled away laughing, quackity looked up into wilburs eyes, soon sending a worried look to the eyebags becoming more and more apparent.

wilbur watched quackity drive off. As he headed inside, he noticed techno giving him a strange glance. "what?" "nothing" "do you have something to say?" "nope, you can head upstairs because I'm perfectly fine." wilbur felt that angry feeling creep up, ignoring phils look telling him to go upstairs and sleep in. "no I think you're upset about something," wilbur walked towards what I cant feel a little happy while drowning in a pit of despair?"

"im not against you being happy wilbur, im just making sure this isn't some spiral you're taking quackity for a ride in"

"excuse me?!" "he left four and a half months ago wil, there's no way you've just- completely moved on from that!" techno huffed, " and quackitys got enough stress right now! " "I know that! and were both fine! why cant you just leave me alone and stay out of me and my boyfriends business!" "not when its causing my dad and my family stress!" "techno-" phil pleaded. "wha-" wilbur looked over to phil, "what stress am I causing you?! i work, I eat, I sleep, and do everything I can to help you around!" "wilbur its okay, I'm not stressed over you," phil turned to techno, "please, don't start this now." "what? i cant be a genius or a prodigy so I'm just a stress hazard for everyone!? yeah I know having a 30 year old that still lives with his dad and isn't allowed to have any contact with his kid isn't such a great footnote during interviews!" wilbur yelled "wilbur! you know that's not true!" phil stood up in anger. "yeah I'm sure its not! its definitely not the reason you haven't spoken jack shit about technos new book deal!" wilbur started to starom upstairs "Language! tommy right here" techno yelled "oh fuck you!" wilbur screamed before he slammed his door. techno sat back in his seat and huffed. wilbur grabbed one of his pillows and muffled the biggest scream ever before punching it aggressively. He fell onto his bed and curled up, feeling significantly colder than he did just 30 minutes ago.

*hand trembling with either pain or excitement, I slowly hand you a cheap souvenir mood ring*

#mmmm future plans #anons my beloved #hi thirsty im dad #htid she took the kids au