#MCU crack

[bitchyycapricorn]

Well. Look at that. Anyways, I wrote this last night while I was drunk.

Peter looks at you from across the room, disgusted by ur gayness.

“Ew. How could u be gay. That’s so gross and totally wrong.” He says.

You look at him like he’s the numbest bitch in the planet. “Peter. Ur literally so stupid. Even frogs r gay.” You counter, still being gay as ever.

Peter narrows his eyes at you, “yeah well those frogs are going to like hell.”

YOu let out a loud laugh and simply counting r to stare at him. “You wanna get fucked by a gay grl.” You tease, beckoning him to come to the bathroom with you.

Peter’s eyes go very wide, but he is intrigued. Even if ur very very gay. So he stands up and goes to the bathroom with you.

You look him in the eyes and smile again. “So what u ganna do for me baby girl?” He asks, a big ass smirk when j his face.

“I’m ganna fuck u until you can’t walk” u say, pulling down his pants.

“Oh god please” peter moans, grabbing your hips and pulling you close. “I want u to tick me so hard please” he begs. Kissing your very soft juicy lips.

You let out a moan, kissing him back very passionately. “Mmm Parker” you grunt, despite not even liking men.

You finish stripping him from all his cloths, then you take off your own. “Wow Peter ur so sexy. I can’t wait to fuck your fat cock”

You push him onto the sink and slowly begin to sink onto his big ginormous fat cock. It feels so good inside you which makes you leg out a loud moan. You grip his hair tight, tugging his brow curls. “Mmmm sexy.”

You groan.

His hands grip ur hips ahead he leads ur hips up and down on his big man

Ohhhhhhh” he cries, kissing ur neck sloppily. “Gosh ur so hot baby” he cries, feeling u on his cock.

You let out another moan before hopping off his big dick, flipping him around, and bumming in his big juicy asshole.

Peter cute too, squirting all over the sink. “Ohhhh shit that felt so good” he moans.

+++

Peter found out he was probate about three months later. He couldn’t. Be more scared of having a gay bitches baby. How could he possibly have the bay of a gay Bo. Like what. Anyways, he was so very pregnant and Tony was so upset because his son is so young and so very pregnant.

But Steve thinks that it’s a miracle from the gays that he’s pregnant with your gay baby.

So Peter is told he has to has it because it’s a gay blessing from a hot sexy woman who got him prhegnage

So he keeps being very very primate u Gil it’s time to deliver. And he had the hunky ads baby and feels so proud cause he’s a mommy now.

But ur a mommy too.

Peter reali3/ he’s so gay because he’s a mommy a fan yoruens a mommy so you’re hay.

Peter is ashamed of his gay self and decides to tie. The baby to bucket because his one hand will be a better mummy them him.

The end.

+++

I’m so so so sorry. Also, if you commented on the OG 🤨 I tagged you

Taglist

@saltistic-dumbassss @t-hollanderrerr @crumpets-are-better-with-jam @clairebearfr @superficial-saturnrings @innieblogg @thetallscorpiobee @spider-biter

#peter parker #peter parker imagine #peter parker smut #peter parker x reader #peter parker fanfiction #peter parker x you #peter parker fluff #peter parker x y/n #peter parker x plus size reader #mcu peter parker #peter parker spiderman #peter parker x fem!reader #peter parker x plus size reader smut #peter parker x reader smut #mcu peter parker x reader #peter parker marvel #peter parker angst #Peter Parker crack #mcu crack

[thefaultinourforcebond]

“Shuri, listen to me. The human world is a mess. Life under the sea is better than anything they got goin' on up there. The seaweed is always greener....”

#nashuri #seaprincess #namor x shuri #mcu crack #namor of talokan #*the whole of talokan breaks into song* #*namora turns the music on* #while we devotin' full time to floatin' under the sea #has this been doen yet

[giveamadeuschohisownmovie]

Marvel exec 1: So, for the Fantastic Four movie, we start off with Susan Storm picking up Franklin Richards from school-

Marvel exec 2: - wait, what? We’re already introducing Franklin?

Marvel exec 1: Pedro Pascal is Reed.

Marvel exec 2: Ohhhhhh, okay, what happens next?

#pedro pascal #mcu #marvel #reed richards #susan storm #franklin richards #fantastic four #fantastic 4 #mcu crack #marvel crack #marvel humor #marvel studios #mr fantastic #mr. fantastic #the invisible woman

[super-sootica]

And two..

#stucky #stuck crack #mcu crack #marvel crack #look if you're team either is bi or pan or whatever I need you to know that this is referencing something else #and if you get the reference you get a cookie

[blackbyrenflowers]

"AI is not like the movies mother."

Shuri, you literally live in a universe where an AI made out of your most important resource tried to kill every living thing on the planet.

#mcu #black panther #wakanda forever #shuri #ultron #mcu crack #queen ramonda

[cherryschaos]

Started watching Thor Love and Thunder and it's LITERALLY a crack fic

I LOVE IT

#thor love and thunder #thor loki #thor 4 #loki of asgard #mcu thor #mcu loki #marvel #chaotic #fanfiction #fanfic #crack fanfic #crack fic #mcu crack #chaotic academia

[ragingstillness]

Thor Love and Thunder Spoilers without any context

#crack #mcu crack #thor #thor 4 #thor love and thunder #thor spoilers #thor love and thunder spoilers #mcu

[sprockingworkingonit]

Stephen Strange/Steven Grant.

C'mon, internet, you know you wanna.

#dr strange #stephen strange #steven grant #marc spector #moon knight #crack pairing #mcu crack

[rowenas-megacoven]

Owen Wilson will never know just how much I love his little ordinary time-man character. In a cinematic universe of super geniuses and sorcerers and aliens and enhanced soldiers and thunder gods, all with crazy abilities, I love his littlest normal human analyst who started out solving time mysteries so, SO much, in my very heart, soul, bones. He’s just some guy but like… he’s NOT just some guy at the same time. Some of my MCU favourites I’ve had over a decade of getting to know them, yet here Mobius is, sitting comfy in one of my atriums like he’s always been there. He’s so soft and soothing and reasonable and safe. If I had to choose between travelling to all sorts of weird and wacky and wonderful places with the Gaurdians, maybe Thor, or sitting in a Burger King gossiping over a Whopper and a Slushie with Mobius, I’d absolutely choose Mobius. He just has this vibe. I totally get why Loki would sit eternally alone to let Mobius live freely. Just a lovely, stand-up lil fella. He is coded like a well-needed hug. Thinking of him right now.

#mobius is like ‘I can fix him’ but actually follows through #I saw a vid of him cracking the ‘That’s showbiz’ joke to Brad and it brought me to tears #then this #what if we never see him again #WHAT IF 😭 #I want more Möbius content #mobius mobius mobius #Möbius #owen wilson #Loki #loki series #Lokius #marvel cinematic universe #mcu #marvel #mwah.txt

[pparkerized]

the scene where loki and mobius narrowly escape death together, wrapped in each others arms was SO gay. but of course they had to ruin it with loki immediately bringing up sylvie afterwards.

#loki writers clearly still on crack thinking a selfcest ship is the route to go here :/ #i used to like sylvie a lot but i feel like the writers kind of ruined her character. i don't necessarily hate her #like she's a genuinely interesting character when she's alone !! #marvel #mcu #loki #loki season 2 #loki spoilers #lokius #mobius m mobius #anti sylki

[fotibrit]

professor! Tony Stark leading an introductory class to robotics. The students, however, are quite surprised to walk in the room and see multiple Avengers casually seated with notebooks out.

(they’re sick of not understanding anything to do with Starks tech, and this might be the only way they start learning)

#marvel mcu #avengers #crack fic idea #fotibrit

[tomriddleslovergirl]

Marvel characters x oblivious!reader

Steve Rogers:

Steve and you had been getting to know each other for the past few months and were becoming good friends. Although, Steve had begun to get feelings for you that were not so friendly. He wanted more out of your guys' relationship.

He'd never been good with flirting, but decided to at least try in doing so incase he scared you off or made you uncomfortable by being too upfront.

So, while on a walk with you one winter day, Steve decided to make his move.

"Y'know, Buck once told me pretty girls always have cold hands." The cold didn't bother Steve because he was a Super-Soldier, but he assumed that it would cause some discomfort for a normal human.

You look down at your hands.

"Huh. Mine are always warm." But either way, you shoved your hands in your jacket pocket, not noticing that Steve had put out his hand for you to hold.

Peter Parker

Peter and you had been going out for a little while now, and every time he'd try to flirt with you, you'd be oblivious. So after building up some confidence (with the help of Ned), he asked you. "Can I have a kiss?"

You look at Peter in shock, wondering how he knew you had a bag of kiss in your bag. You rummage through it and hand him one.

"Here," You say, handing the small chocolate to him.

Ned held in a laugh.

"Th-thanks?" Peter said, his voice cracking with confusion and embarrassment at being rejected - even if it was done obliviously by you.

Wanda Maximoff

Wanda had tried flirting with you before and you would never quite get the hint. She had assumed there was something wrong with the way she tried to make romantic advances with you and went to the Natasha to get some pointers.

Later on, Wanda decided to use some of Nat's tips.

Wanda asked you if you wanted to bake cookies with her and invited you into the Avengers Tower kitchen.

While you both were baking and talking, Wanda would try to make her laughs sound breathy when you made a joke or would compliment you from time to time.

When she noticed you were having trouble icing one of the cookies, she stood behind you, and gently wrapped one of her hands around your hand that was holding the piping bag while you held onto the cookie.

"Here," she whispered, her hot breath hitting your ear as she helped you ice your cookie.

After Wanda was done, she placed the icing bag on the counter and looked at you, trying to see if her flirting had done the trick. But you don't notice anything out of the ordinary.

"Thanks, Wanda," you say, thinking she was just trying to be helpful.

You went to grab another cookie to ice, when she suddenly grabbed your chin. "You have something on your face," she says.

You look up at her in surprise as she swipes her thumb against your cheek. She brings her thumb to her mouth before licking the icing off.

You look up at Wanda, your brows furrowed. "That's disgusting, Wanda."

#Reader is a total dumbass😭😭 #This was based off of a tiktok but for some reason I couldn't link it😭😭 #peter parker x reader #peter parker #spider-man x reader #x reader #spider-man #marvel x reader #mcu x reader #mcu #marvel #steve rogers #steve rogers x reader #crack fic #wanda maximoff x reader #wanda maximoff #wanda x reader #wanda x you #fanfiction #captain america x reader #wanda maximoff x y/n #captain america

[dawnquafam]

cinematic parallels

#every time i look away from orm's pic and then look back at it i crack up all over again #loki laufeyson #orm marius #mcu #dceu

[giveamadeuschohisownmovie]

Another concept for “She-Hulk”:

So you know how one of the released clips of the show was a parody of “Law and Order”? The one with the guy with the deep voice who made the Law and Order “dun dun” noise. 

For the episode featuring Daredevil, bring back that same guy and have him do an acapella version of the Daredevil opening theme.

Or better yet...Charlie Cox does the acapella version of his own show’s theme.

#she hulk #she hulk attorney at law #attorney at law #she-hulk #jennifer walters #law and order #matt murdock #daredevil #charlie cox #tatiana maslany #marvel humor #mcu crack #NMCU #the defenders #hulk #the incredible hulk

[super-sootica]

Y'all were whining about us overusing the Castiel version so here you go, Ernie declaring his love to Bucky Barnes. This is your fault, think about you did

#sesame street confession meme #spn crack #mcu crack #marvel crack #bucky barnes #the winter soldier #bert and ernie

[lukas-dusk]

Peter : We need a distraction.

Matt : Is anyone here good at jumping up and down and making weird noises?

Wade, whispering : My time has finally come.

#incorrect quotes #marvel #mcu #peter parker #spider man #daredevil #matt murdock #wade wilson #deadpool #team red #marvel cinematic universe #Chaotic #crack