#Like obv it’s gonna take me forever to actually level him up but he can be there for moral support!!

[punkscowardschampions]

Buster & Rio Pt.4

Buster: [you know he’s gonna go like the gentleman he is and that he doesn’t need to ask because he’d been watching her all night since the second he walked in mcvickers’ pub door so knows what she likes and will shamelessly buy her the most expensive version of her fave because he is that bitch being all ‘they’re on me’ about it cos not gonna let her buy a single drink the entire time actually]

Rio: [‘I can get the next round’ like excuse me, I wanted to but we’re only that non-mad level of hey about it ‘I never buy drinks’ like if anything the world is owed so many on me]

Buster: [‘and you’re not starting now’ as he bowls off to get these drinks like no no]

Rio: [be here shaking your head like oh you]

Buster: [just be staring at her while it takes forever and a day to get served because how busy it would be in there makes me feel anxious]

Rio: you have really intense eyes, you know

Buster: The drugs are too long gone to blame

Rio: it’s just you

Buster: I’ll take it over nice

Rio: it’s a compliment, obviously

Rio: piercing just feels like the sort of word they only use in romance novels

Buster: I’d have to take your word for that, or be lying if I said I’d read any romance novels

Rio: 😏

Rio: only if it’s on your syllabus right now, I’m sure

Buster: yeah, and for better or worse, they definitely aren’t

Rio: I’ll read one to you when your head is done in by what is

Buster: A promise or a threat?

Rio: I guess we won’t find out how you feel about them ‘til we start

Buster: already knowing how I feel about your voice takes some of the guesswork out of it though

Rio: probably meant to be in your voice 

Buster: What do you mean?

Rio: the Prince Charming of it all, Hugh Grant

Buster: too predictable and tired

Rio: alright, I won’t set you a reading assignment back 🤪

Buster: There are better tasks you could set me

Rio: tempting thought

Buster: you’re welcome for it then

Rio: got to keep entertained somehow whilst we wait

Buster: Almost sounds like a dare

Rio: I’m up for the challenge if you are

Rio: the crowd I’m swamped by rn is so boring

Buster: of course I am

Rio: that’ll be why I like you best

Buster: The question is, do you want to dare first or be dared?

Rio: dare me

Buster: [we’re gonna have to say he does and it’s scandalous but she obvs does it because my googling and brain have both let me down but y’all would slay]

Rio: fuck, okay

Rio: [however long it would take you to do that and prove it etc]

Rio: 😇😇😇

Buster: Dare me, we’ll see how 😇 you actually are

Rio: alright, I’ve thought of a good one

Rio: tell someone at the bar that you fucked your cousin today

Buster: okay, come here so you’re in earshot

Rio: [do that, at least you’re tiny, snekk through these hoards of people casually]

Buster: [do that because my boo isn’t a flop and actually thought of something, and I’m gonna say either the bar person or someone else gives you a shot thinking it’s bants so you can give that to her]

Rio: [do that feeling like such a spy like haha you have no idea, random person]

Buster: You earned that for combining a dare and a truth

Rio: I’m good at games, you can’t have forgotten

Buster: I remember

Rio: you can tell me I’m 😇 now

Buster: [pulling her even closer to him through however many peeps necessary, excuse us, I have to do a hot move, so he can fully whisper in her ear just to be the most extra about it ‘you’re my angel, you can’t have forgotten either’]

Rio: [doing a shiver because we have not honey, shaking our head ‘never’]

Buster: [we all know it’s not a cold shiver but putting his arms around her anyway, just to be even closer ‘don’t’ because seriously never forget thank you]

Rio: [leaning into him like yes hug me ‘I promise’]

Buster: [hugging and kissing her in this little queue for drinks, no fucks given]

Rio: [‘I missed you’ as if you lasted any time at all]

Buster: [‘because you’re a good girl’ like yes of course you did]

Rio: [‘because you’re so…’ looking him up and down like you’re trying to think of an appropriate word for how missable he is ‘daddy’]

Buster: [gotta kiss her harder because he loves hearing that]

Rio: [making him hold you for a sec ‘cos you need to, making happy noises]

Buster: [and you’ll probably be able to get your drinks not long after that because the kind of charmed night you’re having and charmed life he leads in general so everyone will be thrilled about y’all leaving this queue]

Rio: [get out the way lads, and drink some of this drink instead of just making out, as is the temptation to do at all times]

Buster: [drink some of your fancy drinks and maybe you’ll calm down, my boo say]

Rio: [you absolutely won’t but we must at least not totally abandon them after the time and effort to get lol]

Buster: [there’s no calming down remotely until he’s at the airport but yeah, take a sec here]

Rio: [check in on all your siblings to make sure everyone is behaving even though it makes you sigh ‘cos real life]

Buster: [put an arm round her again but this time in a genuinely trying to be comforting manner because that sigh which you can easily guess the reason for]

Rio: [shaking it off metaphorically and literally like no, fuck that, can’t waste time]

Buster: [in the spirit of that, down what’s left of your drink and get her to do the same and go do some more grooving]

Rio: [you know none of the songs will be close to slow so do the most getting hot and sweaty]

Buster: [it’s been a minute since the initial dirty dancing that started all this, love that we’ve come back around]

Rio: [go us, if you want we can skip to when you have to start leaving ‘cos we know the vibe here]

Buster: [my boo says drinking and dancing is what’s up, but we absolutely can skip you’re so right, cos that’s gonna be the drama]

Rio: [just a thought lol ‘cos you’re probably just calling a car straight from this club so good luck saying this goodbye]

Buster: [I wonder what time clerbs shut on st paddy’s, something I have no clue about]

Rio: [me either, I’m just assuming they could stay open later but who actually knows]

Buster: [even if it’s poetic licence I agree that him leaving straight from there is a whole mood, and I am gonna be a massive cliche and say that he takes his jumper back but gives her his watch, which will be as adorably big on her, with the energy of counting down til Easter, soz again we are cockblocking you, love how cinematic it would be that he’s putting his jumper back on and she’s lowkey sad about it but then he puts his watch on her wrist, which he has been grabbing all night, though]

Rio: [it’s a cliche but a glorious one and yes v cinematic girl, unable to help our very real 🥺 about it, hugging you the tightest we are capable of]

Buster: [nbd just giving her his rolex like it’s nothing, sir ILY but you are ridiculous]

Rio: [thank god we know she’ll look after it lmao]

Buster: [his fam gonna think he’s been mugged lol, but he cares not and he’s just hugging her back and saying ‘I’ll see you soon’ from within it because a promise even though it ends up taking y’all longer to see each other again than you think rn]

Rio: [also your fam like where did you get that but that’s not an issue for now, excuse us we’re having emotions, just kiss him in response like it’ll be a million years regardless]

Buster: [they simply DON’T care about that soz baze and cali fams but they’re too in love atm keep your questions to yourselves, all they are bothered about is having this epic goodbye kiss and keeping it going to the literal last possible second and I do mean seriously until he’s getting in this car, don’t @ us]

Rio: [just annoying this driver by lowkey getting into this car to continue until you’re really forced to stop by time and said driver like hello ‘I’ll be waiting’ as you finally untangle yourself]

Buster: [sorry to that man, but I’m sure he’ll tip you to make up for it, sir, so you’ll be fine ‘Good’ with ALL the feeling ever that you can put into a single word]

Rio: [clearly you’re already like an exclusive and pricey driver or you’d never find one on this day at this short notice so you’ll be fine lmao, just shut this door for him and start waving like you’re not gutted]

Buster: [dramatically staring out of this car window at her until he can’t see her anymore is the only acceptable move because likewise trying and failing not to be and seem devastated lol]

Rio: [don’t know where the hell you’re going to go now and how you’re remotely going to start to process that]

Buster: [honestly, he has a flight to catch but she’s just been left there with nothing but a rolex and her feelings]

Rio: [like on the one hand, being alone would mean you could think about it but you might want to distract yourself so going to a friends is best of both but then if you fully wanted to distract yourself you could go back to the fam but I really don’t know at this point and probably neither do you so]

Buster: [lowkey wandering the streets but on her own this time, reliving it all, again how cinematic]

Rio: Will you tell me when you get back to London

Buster: Yeah, unless you’d rather I didn’t

Rio: why would I rather that

Buster: because it ends things, for now, at least

Rio: you don’t have to talk to me if you don’t want, I just wanna know

Buster: I’ll tell you, I said so

Rio: okay

Buster: It will be, you know

Rio: ‘course it will, there’s no reason why not

Buster: [telling her what time he’s due back so she can check this rolex like hang in there sis]

Rio: be home before you know it

Buster: Back to my real life

Rio: right, only a holiday here and for the night

Buster: exactly

Rio: probably take me longer to get back

Buster: Walking, in those shoes, we can call it a definite, babe

Rio: pisstake 😏

Buster: I’ve spoilt you and you’re out of practice even walking at all

Rio: Yeah you have

Buster: if you’re waiting for an apology you’ll be waiting longer than the easter hols, I’m not sorry

Rio: I’m only sorry it’s over, don’t get it twisted

Buster: It isn’t over yet, London marks the end

Rio: so talk to me

Buster: You don’t need to dare me to

Rio: The driver wasn’t that scary

Buster: Fear’s a motivator regardless

Rio: not necessarily one I aim to inspire though

Buster: you inspire the other

Rio: yeah?

Buster: tonight proved it

Rio: Agreed, definitely weren’t scared

Buster: Relying on a John Lennon quote as the basis for anything, though, is hardly the move

Rio: other % of your heritage being celebrated, like

Buster: playing fair isn’t always totally redundant, it has its place

Rio: If it’s fair to us, sure

Buster: it was complimentary to you, so

Rio: I know you can do better than that

Buster: You don’t like inspiring?

Rio: Hmm

Rio: 6/10, could be more if proven

Buster: noted

Buster: I’ll prove it using the pics of you, first chance I get

Rio: 😋

Rio: okay, that works

Buster: your underwear will too, very well

Rio: you were right, you needed them much more than I did

Buster: I’m rarely wrong, I did tell you

Rio: It might take a bit longer for me to get used to just how right you are

Buster: Truthfully, I can’t get used to having them in my pocket, it’s really distracting

Rio: I bet your hand is on them right now

Buster: one of them, it’s a secret where the other hand is

Rio: from the driver but from me?

Buster: you can guess, you’re a lot smarter than he is

Rio: I can imagine, almost well enough to feel it myself

Buster: like I said, smart in the Scouse sense

Rio: I just look like I’m really worried what time it is

Buster: Or really worried about wearing a watch like that as a girl all alone

Rio: being this naked felt smarter when you were here too

Buster: I’m going to have to teach you how to keep yourself safe when I’m not there

Rio: I know how to talk to people, it’s not gonna get nicked

Buster: I’m not worried about it, and I won’t be about you when you know what to do when talking isn’t working

Rio: Don’t worry about me, I’ll be at the pub before long

Buster: tonight, but I’m not back until [whatever date Easter is, soz once again babe lol]

Buster: I’ll make the lessons fun, you don’t need to worry it’ll be boring

Rio: I’m not worried about that

Rio: you’re meant to be remembering what’s good about me though, not thinking about my literal shortcomings

Buster: It isn’t a negative

Rio: that I can’t take care of myself?

Buster: that I get to show you how to

Rio: that has appeal, definitely

Buster: Or that you’re such a tiny little baby

Rio: being totally dependent on you was so good

Buster: it won’t be long before I’m not gonna be in London any more and you can be all the time

Rio: You know how much I need you to look after me

Buster: And we both know I’m the only one who can do it right

Rio: you’re the only one I trust

Rio: others have tried

Buster: but try is all they can do, never succeed the way I have

Rio: it’s never been anything like how it was with you

Buster: Because you’re mine, for me

Rio: like I was made for you

Buster: we fit together like that, I told you how into it I was

Rio: you like how small I am as much as I like how big you are

Buster: Like isn’t the word

Rio: it’s an obsession, I can’t stop thinking about it

Buster: Yeah, it is

Rio: I’ll be sick in the head if it means I can have you

Buster: I can’t stop touching myself right now

Rio: you have to, you’ll be so bored otherwise

Buster: you’ve got me feeling the strongest urge to

Rio: you can do whatever you want, you’re paying top dollar

Buster: What do you want me to do?

Rio: just keep thinking about your tiny little baby and touching yourself

Buster: You’re all I can think about

Rio: Good

Rio: you aren’t allowed to forget about me

Buster: Don’t let me

Rio: I can annoy you constantly

Buster: No, it’d only be annoying from someone else

Rio: you want all my attention

Buster: Why would I accept any less?

Rio: I’m obsessed with you, if you want it, you can have everything, you know that

Buster: All or nothing, you know that

Buster: give me fucking everything

Rio: It's already yours, I am

Buster: I’m yours, so completely

Rio: Buster

Buster: Rio

Rio: keep me forever 

Buster: if you could fit in my pocket too I’d take you out and have you wrapped around me like this underwear is

Rio: you need me that close, that often

Rio: you need looking after too

Buster: yeah

Rio: give them back at easter so I can wear them, feel how many loads you had to blow into them

Buster: You’re on

Rio: that makes me happy

Buster: you make me

Buster: Jesus, this feels so good and you’re not even here

Rio: How are you staying quiet?

Rio: it’s so loud when I walk

Buster: I’m not

Rio: that’s so sexy

Buster: Stop walking, sit down and show me how happy you are

Rio: [do that despite the fact you’re still just in the street somewhere because simply must]

Buster: oh god, now taste yourself for me

Rio: [video for that]

Rio: you miss how it tastes

Buster: I really do

Rio: I do taste good but I like it better when you can taste me for yourself

Buster: you’re my favourite taste, you know that

Rio: if you don’t remember how much I love your cum, you’ll have to look at the photos

Buster: I haven’t been able to close them

Rio: I’ll send you new ones every day

Buster: I’ll book you a flight as soon I can

Rio: you will?

Buster: I need you in the same city as I am, as much as possible

Rio: I love you, you know

Buster: Fuck, don’t say it if you don’t

Rio: I’m not

Buster: then say it again, please

Rio: I love you

Buster: It’s too late to show you what that just did to me

Rio: I wanted to say it when you were still here but I was too scared to

Buster: I can protect you whatever happens, scared is for other people

Rio: I’ve said it now, I couldn’t take it back if I wanted 

Rio: did you manage not to make a mess, as I’m not there to clean it up for you 

Buster: That’s not true, I wouldn’t hold what’s said in the heat of the moment, or when we’ve both had as many drinks as we have, against you 

Buster: wrong twin, you can take it back, or anything else, if you want to

Rio: do you want me to?

Buster: I’m giving you the option, I didn’t say it

Rio: alright 

Buster: you know it is

Rio: obviously I can do what I want 

Buster: Yeah, that’s been the entire point of tonight

Rio: I don’t know if point is the right word 

Buster: doing what we both want has been the most important thing, how could it not be the right word?

Rio: I dunno, wasn’t like there was a game plan or something 

Rio: It was unavoidable, bound to happen 

Buster: I’m obviously not suggesting either of us planned this

Rio: No

Buster: of course not

Rio: be mad to

Buster: and another case of mistaken identity

Rio: awkward at this point

Buster: awkward definitely wouldn’t be the word

Rio: closer to mortifying

Buster: As is the fact she’s getting yet another mention

Rio: I didn’t bring it up as a 💭

Buster: no, I did, and I was trying to make you feel better

Rio: Why? I’m good

Buster: Because I give a fuck and I wanted to make sure you were

Rio: You’re good, honestly, don’t worry

Buster: okay, Rio

Rio: Oi, why are you Rio’ing me like you don’t believe me?

Buster: Why would I believe you?

Buster: we barely know each other, which is why you were scared to tell me you love me in person and why I was giving you an opportunity to act like you hadn’t said it once you did

Rio: I don’t care, we’re still family

Buster: Don’t, that’s so distracting

Rio: You can’t deny that, it’s facts

Rio: no matter what else

Buster: I know, I’m not denying it, or you

Rio: Then let it be distracting, let me

Buster: What are you asking my permission to do, baby?

Rio: Let me turn you on

Buster: I can’t stop you, remember, everything you do is a turn on 

Buster: and I don’t want to, that’s a proven fact in itself now

Rio: You like it, I like it, there’s no reason to fight that, whatever words you put to it

Rio: You want me

Buster: It’s a fight I’m well aware I’d lose, and that isn’t a position I’d ever willingly put myself in

Rio: it isn’t one I’m interested in putting you in either 

Buster: we’re left with plenty of others

Rio: my current options are slightly limited but you’re still right

Rio: pretty quiet here… should’ve found this spot earlier

Buster: Mine too, but I can be quieter myself this time

Rio: Do you have to?

Rio: your driver has such bad taste to not want to hear more

Buster: If you wanna hear me, I’ll let you

Rio: You’re the best

Rio: but it’s cute, imagining you trying to keep quiet

Buster: I am, so don’t underestimate me, babe

Rio: Doesn’t sound like me, babe

Buster: at least I know you haven’t been robbed yet, it’s still very much you I’m talking to

Rio: I can take care of myself a 🤏

Rio: just prefer it when I don’t have to

Buster: Completely helpless would be a turn off, there are already too many girls like that in my circles

Rio: I’m familiar

Buster: my sister talks about it enough without me bringing it up as well

Rio: I’ve met a few of them, had my own friends like it before

Rio: it’s usually a grift anyway, stupider or kind guys will fall for it ‘til they learn better

Buster: I don’t doubt for your friends it is, mine actually need a nanny along with the rest of their staff until they’re 21

Rio: 🙄

Buster: yeah

Rio: well, must be nice to be able to afford to

Buster: Everything has its pros and cons

Buster: but I’d personally rather see my parents more than a couple of times a year

Rio: Obviously, everyone knows how fucked up posh kids can be

Rio: just a different look on how fucked up really poor kids can be too

Buster: Living in extremes leads to behaviour that is

Rio: and suburban middle class kids are bored, everyone has their shit

Buster: and their excuses ready

Rio: Valid or otherwise

Buster: I don’t think there is any valid justification for shitty behaviour, or that anyone should be given further encouragement to push blame around

Rio: Sure but there’s exceptions 

Buster: that’s such a polite way to disagree

Rio: I don’t gain anything by judging anyone

Rio: have to make sure you’re perfect before you start that

Buster: Well, you are perfect, take the moral high ground as often as you like

Rio: That was smooth

Buster: it’s a fact

Rio: Did your parents have to get the earliest flight possible

Buster: They didn’t know I’d have a reason to want to stay this badly

Rio: True, can’t exactly bring it up for a reschedule either

Buster: No, but I could’ve brought you to the airport with me

Buster: I’m an idiot for not taking full advantage of this driver

Rio: Oh

Rio: why didn’t we think of that before now 🥺

Rio: I’m stupid for getting out the car

Buster: We weren’t thinking clearly

Rio: Impossible to

Buster: I forgive you for not being here, it’d be as impossible not to when I still can’t stop thinking about everything we did while I was there

Rio: I’d know you were lying if you tried to say otherwise

Buster: You’ve always been able to tell

Rio: maybe I just pay close attention to you

Buster: there’s no maybe

Rio: not now

Rio: no plausible deniability with you, at least

Buster: Oh, do you think it’s plausible to pretend there was ever a maybe?

Rio: Oi, that’s nothing to do with me, you just think everyone is always looking at you 😏

Buster: As I’m not totally oblivious, I notice the people who definitely are

Rio: It’s definitely now, is it?

Buster: you chose maybe, I didn’t

Rio: You know how I think about you, and how often

Buster: Remind me

Rio: I think that looking at you has always been enough to turn me on

Rio: for as long as I can remember 

Rio: which could be very inconvenient considering but I never minded 

Buster: [Tell her about how turned on you were the last time you saw her and have a lil reminisce, I won’t commit y’all cos we might wanna do it at some point as there’d obvs be a vibe if not also a full moment ™️ to end up here, I think it would’ve been Christmas, even if you bailed before nye to party with your flop friends, correct me if I’m wrong]

Rio: [I think it would deffo be Christmas, nothing else is big enough bar NYE and like you said, you’d both be with friends for that more likely]

Rio: You looked even better than the last time I saw you, I don’t know how it’s always possible for you to best yourself but 😾

Buster: I could say the same about you and managing to wear my jumper so well though

Rio: Almost as well as I’m wearing your watch now

Buster: and you will the lingerie when that arrives

Rio: you’ll be the first to know 

Buster: It’ll soften the blow of returning home

Rio: Distracting you from your studies sounds more interesting than my own

Buster: Being distracted sounds too tempting not to allow

Rio: You have to play too, you’ve heard the saying

Buster: but it’s undeniably almost as tempting to see what you’ll do if I ignored you again

Rio: Well that’s just mean

Buster: Come on, play along

Rio: maybe I will when you actually ignore me

Rio: risk you have to take, isn’t it

Buster: you’ve heard the saying, no risk, no reward

Rio: 🤞 babe

Buster: Wishing me luck implies you think I’ll need it, a belief I can’t and don’t share

Rio: 😏

Buster: How did you know that’s what my face looks like right now?

Rio: I got a pretty good look

Rio: not just across crowded rooms, like

Buster: Pretty good?

Buster: that isn’t good enough

Buster: [obvs sending her a pic like hey]

Rio: 😍😍😍

Rio: I can’t handle you

Buster: Not true, you’re the only girl who can

Rio: You ain’t gonna wish that weren’t true any time soon

Buster: I know

Rio: just like you’re not REALLY going to want to ignore me

Rio: right, daddy?

Buster: I included the almost for a reason, baby

Rio: 🥰

Rio: the walk back feels longer

Buster: The drive to the airport is too short though

Rio: what you get for paying for a decent service 

Rio: I’ll miss having you all to myself

Buster: I already miss you

Rio: It’s weird, I couldn’t miss you before

Rio: who knows when we’d see each other again

Buster: Christmas was the only real certainty 

Buster: and we couldn’t tell each other how much we did, if or when

Rio: definite risk, no idea on the reward, yeah

Buster: Some idea, still a foolish amount of risk

Rio: Not as much idea as you’d like

Buster: unfortunately

Rio: it’s different now

Buster: and we aren’t really gonna go back, I was just playing about ignoring you

Rio: You know I wouldn’t let you for long

Rio: only long enough to be fun

Buster: I know there are so many other ways we can have fun

Rio: I know you do, even if I wasn’t totally certain before tonight

Buster: Weren’t you?

Rio: Not saying I thought you were boring or anything

Buster: What are you saying?

Rio: Just that I didn’t know how fun you were, obviously

Buster: We both outdid ourselves tonight

Rio: agreed

Rio: No need to hold back now

Buster: agreed

Rio: so you can talk to me a bit when you’re on the plane, right?

Buster: Yeah, of course

Rio: 🥰 thank God

Buster: You should be thanking me

Rio: I intend to

Buster: yeah?

Rio: you don’t remember how I worshipped you?

Rio: that won’t do

Buster: I haven’t forgotten, that wouldn’t do either

Rio: I’ll still remind you

Buster: good

Rio: soon, don’t want any random thinking it’s for them

Buster: Where are you?

Rio: nearly at [the location of the party]

Buster: Well then I wouldn’t worry, nobody left there is gonna be capable of forming a coherent thought

Rio: That’s true for the whole town, I reckon 😏

Buster: except for us

Rio: You’re worth being sober for

Buster: Nobody has ever told me that before

Rio: Sounds like they’ve got a problem then

Buster: A drinking problem?

Buster: true for my whole town

Rio: If anything gets in the way of feeling good, what’s the point

Buster: It’s a pointless postcode which I don’t belong in

Rio: Couldn’t agree more, obviously 😋

Buster: You’re biased, about Trinity’s location and me

Rio: Me? 😇

Rio: not at all buzzing how long it’ll take you to be properly qualified either

Buster: absolutely not

Rio: You’ll like Trinity

Buster: [tell her the uni stats etc cos idk but you would before you accepted that offer]

Rio: I meant the atmosphere but that’ll undoubtedly help

Buster: Oh, I’m sure I’ll love the atmosphere

Rio: You’re adorable

Buster: Me?

Rio: Very

Rio: and I’m not just saying that because I’ve got here and everyone is, as predicted, a total state

Buster: or because I’d have insane FOMO if you don’t

Rio: you know damn well you’re the only person I actually want to be with right now

Buster: I feel the exact same, you know

Rio: I’m gonna go sit on the kitchen floor and think about you

Buster: You’re full of the best ideas

Rio: [pics to show as much]

Rio: feeling like the best/worst idea and I’d rather go with your analysis so

Buster: The choices we’ve made shows our judgement has been impeccable 

Rio: I can’t even remember how it happened but I couldn’t be happier it did, conscious choice or otherwise

Buster: It happened because I’m full of the best ideas too

Rio: okay, so tell me what I should do now

Buster: That depends on which of the kitchen floor moments were your favourite

Rio: How can I pick when it was all perfect 🥴

Buster: think really hard

Rio: I can only think about how your cum should be all over my face still

Buster: Look at the pics again

Rio: Fuck, okay

Buster: it was you that was perfect, don’t forget it

Rio: I can tell you think it, just looking at these pictures you took

Buster: Everybody thinks it, I just acted on the thought before any of them did

Rio: I only want you

Rio: you treat me right

Buster: How else can I expect to keep you?

Rio: I’m yours for a reason

Buster: and you’ll stay mine for a reason

Rio: when you rub my feet…

Buster: I should be, you’ve walked so far

Rio: it aches

Buster: my poor baby

Rio: I really, really need you to look after me

Buster: Without me to take care of you, you’re never gonna feel better

Rio: I can’t do anything right now I’m so overwhelmed

Buster: [this boy just sending her a v extra and ‘comforting’ voice note as if this driver doesn’t exist]

Rio: your voice is so sexy, you haven’t talked to me enough

Buster: [obvs gonna call her, again as if both of y’all are alone when you absolutely are not]

Rio: [just answering with 🥺 noises as if you’re incapable of anything more rn]

Buster: [giving even more comforting noises back because of course]

Rio: [‘Buster, I seriously miss you’ as if you were thinking we were playing like no, you gotta know]

Buster: [saying her name with ridiculous amounts of !! because hard same in case she didn’t know lol]

Rio: [just moaning in response to this ‘I want you back’ again like its not so obvious already]

Buster: [‘I want you here’ likewise as obvious and also totally impractical for her to be in this car rn, the poor driver is having to deal with enough but anyway]

Rio: [‘if I was there-’ with the oh the things I would do not needing to be said]

Buster: [I don’t need to be going into the graphic detail he is about the things he’d be doing if she was, we know damn well and Clove is barely letting me type rn as it is]

Rio: [being blatant about how this has made us feel and what we’re having to do about it]

Buster: [it’s clearly mutual despite Clove saying no saucy antics]

Rio: [‘I don’t even care how embarrassing it would be if anyone walked in on me’ ‘cos clearly]

Buster: [add to the number of approx peeps who have witnessed y’all being feral as if someone had, being like ‘[such and such] isn’t an embarrassing number’ because we all know y’all are about it] 

Rio: [‘but I’m alone this time’ like isn’t that what would make it cringe, even though we actually don’t think it is]

Buster: [‘No you aren’t’ because really trying to do the most to make it like y’all are together rn]

Rio: [make happy noises about it]

Buster: [in the spirit of what she said about getting walked in on and not caring, tell her about this poor driver’s reactions to y’all being feral as per]

Rio: [‘tell him I’m sorry’ in the least sorry voice of all time tbh]

Buster: [‘I’ll tell him to make a detour and pick you up’ just saying we don’t care if we miss our flight as if baze wouldn’t be like um wtf son]

Rio: [‘you know I’d love that’ because obviously we don’t think it’s going to happen]

Buster: [I simply can’t let it happen sir, this is night 1 there will be plenty of time for things like that, calm down lol ‘I know you love me’ because he was into it sis, however much he tried to be like you can take it back if you want lol lol]

Rio: [‘yeah’ like you’re so nonchalant and there’s no part of you freaking out over how he feels that you said that ‘you don’t want me to get married’]

Buster: [‘you don’t want to marry somebody else’ just hardcore saying she does wanna marry you there, bighead, where’s the lie but you didn’t have to say it atm]

Rio: [you can’t really clapback like yes I do because who so just making a noise like the cheek]

Buster: [‘you belong to and with me’ like that’s case closed]

Rio: [when that shamelessly turns you on to a ridiculous degree ‘alright, come pick me up’ like you must]

Buster: [‘What do you have to say first?’ do we mean please or ILY or both, shan’t elaborate]

Rio: [going with neither and parroting ‘I belong to and with you’ like it’s a contract]

Buster: [this nerd being so turned on about it, I have to lol, being loud like that’s remotely acceptable]

Rio: [‘it’s not right that I’m not there’ as if there’s anything y’all can do about it ‘you wanna spend more time with me, don’t you?’]

Buster: [‘yeah’ but there’s nothing nonchalant about it, it’s obvs indecent and he’s also obvs going into yet more graphic detail about how that time would be spent]

Rio: [‘I swear that’s all I wanna do’ getting louder ourself because we’re so !!]

Buster: [‘You’re so good at promises’ because how she sounds just is sending him, he’s dying over here]

Rio: [‘you make it really easy to want to give you everything’ no lie, we’re on the same level here]

Buster: [‘You make it possible to offer you everything you could ever want without turning me into a liar’ because will give you everything, you’ll see, gal]

Rio: [just have to call him daddy because too compromised in all the ways]

Buster: [calling her baby in response because simply must but we all know he’s feral about the d word so that’s coming out sounding indecent af]

Rio: [‘keep me’ with all the sincerity and urgency like you cannot just leave this at this point, even though we know you all can’t, you’d obviously still be slightly concerned in the AM you might change your mind]

Buster: [‘it’s all I wanna do’ as !! ‘keep you feeling like this’ as if that makes it any less sincere or you can remotely pretend it’s just in a saucy manner]

Rio: [‘I will do anything for you’ so seriously like name it and it’s done lmao because we just wanna scream ILY at you at this point]

Buster: [‘say it’ because honey he wants to hear her scream ILY at him, can’t and won’t even pretend otherwise in this moment]

Rio: [we know what you mean and that gets to us like nothing else could so we are saying it but it’s amazing it comes out at all for how indecent a tone we are having to say it in]

Buster: [we all remember it making him cum the first time she said it so there’s no way it isn’t going to this time when she’s not only saying it again but being that extra about it, fully losing it in this car, soz to that man driving]

Rio: [which will in turn make you cum gal so excuse us, this party, we aren’t soz and it cannot be helped, here attempting to catch our breath]

Buster: [likewise so I love that you’re breathing together v dramatically on this phone lol, thank god he didn’t actually insist on the car being turned around cos how awks]

Rio: [gonna say you have to hang up this call to talk to someone who has walked in, whether they’re being like can u stop or flirty about it]

Buster: [both are realistic and feasible scenarios depending on the type of person strolling in, meanwhile this boy just sending her a pic of the mess he is in after all that, shamelessly and unrepentant]

Rio: 🤤

Rio: gimme

Buster: I swear I can feel your tongue on me

Rio: I wish I could taste you

Buster: I’ll do it for you

Rio: did I mention I fucking love you

Buster: [sending her a lil video of that moment for no reason except to be feral and so he can also react to the ILY because never over it]

Rio: I swear you aren’t real, you’re so perfect

Buster: Everything you could ever want, that’s what I said, and I’m a man of my word

Rio: How do you know exactly what I want though

Buster: because we’re soulmates, remember, I told you that too

Rio: how could I forget that

Buster: don’t

Rio: never ever

Buster: Rio

Rio: Yeah?

Buster: I’m basically at the airport

Rio: it’s okay

Buster: okay isn’t the word

Rio: no but I can’t say how gutted I am without sounding hysterical

Buster: I don’t know what to say and speechless for me might as well be hysterical

Rio: I won’t tell if you don’t

Buster: you can’t and neither can I

Rio: is that a good or a bad thing for you?

Buster: It’s a little jarring, given that this is the first thing in my life I won’t be bragging about after the fact, but I like having you as my secret more than I care about scoring points with people who are soon to be totally irrelevant

Rio: that’s logical

Rio: and you have so much else to brag about

Buster: exactly, why would I chalk it up to any kind of loss for staying between us when it’s actually the opposite

Rio: secrets are fun, if your friends didn’t suck so hard, you’d know

Buster: I can be myself with you, even if that’s bordering on hysterical

Rio: Not a word I’d choose but still, of course you can

Buster: it hasn’t been an of course before, with anyone else

Rio: People can be hard to trust

Rio: like you said, there’s security in this, neither of us can say anything without blowing our own shit up with it, and why would we do that

Buster: I don’t think you would betray my trust, under any circumstances, these are unusual but if they were more conventional and you had the option to, you still couldn’t

Buster: it isn’t who you are

Rio: I mean, yeah, I would never do that to you, I can’t imagine wanting to do that to hurt you for any reason

Rio: you wouldn’t do it either, we couldn’t have taken the risk if we really thought that was a possibility

Buster: That was never where the risk came from, no

Rio: we won’t get caught

Buster: I’ve done worse, you can rely on me

Rio: Fucking you whilst they were all in the building was so good, we can’t get caught because I need it again and again

Buster: We won’t

Buster: I had you up against the cellar door and nobody on the other side of it realised

Rio: I screamed your name so many times

Buster: I need that again and again

Rio: I don’t care who else is around then, or how close

Buster: I don’t give a fuck how close this airport is, all I can think about is making you scream

Rio: you’re so thoughtful, baby

Buster: you’re so important to me

Rio: your favourite

Buster: my girl

Rio: your soulmate

Buster: my perfect match

Rio: made for you

Buster: blood, like you said

Rio: you can fuck me forever, there’s no going anywhere, we’ll always be family

Buster: Jesus, I’ll miss my flight whilst waiting outside the airport if you don’t stop turning me on

Rio: I’ll try to behave, even though nothing about that really makes me want to

Buster: behaving could mean making me cum for the last time

Rio: protecting my reputation and halo like I’m not debating all the ways you can make me scream with our family there

Buster: You’re my angel, not theirs

Buster: and you know how badly I want to do every way

Rio: you like it as much as I do, that’s why you’re touching yourself again, just like I am

Buster: I love it

Rio: no one else should be able to touch me, not when you’re the one who’s always turned me on the most

Buster: they’re not anymore

Rio: you want me just for you, tell me 

Buster: any cunt who lays a hand on you will lose the use of it and I’ll break their jaw if they even try to kiss you

Rio: I’m so in love with you

Rio: too bad I’ll never see it because I’m solely yours now

Buster: I can always go for eye sockets when they look, if you wanna see how I feel about you

Rio: I wanna see you fight, can I

Buster: I’d let you watch every single one, be in London all the time

Rio: move me in

Buster: fuck you in each room of the house

Rio: I want you to be thinking about me wherever you are

Buster: I already am

Rio: every room, yeah

Buster: You know I’m obsessed with you

Rio: you can be all I think about, keep this up

Buster: I could travel back to America or anywhere I’ve been before or have yet to go to and I’d still have thoughts of nothing else

Rio: I’m yours before I’m anything else, you know that was true the moment you touched me

Buster: You didn’t need to touch me to make me yours, I haven’t been anyone’s the way I am for you

Rio: Buster

Buster: none of it means a thing, I thought I wasn’t being real because it’s all too shallow for any depth of feeling, and that’s true, but it was also because I was waiting for you

Rio: there’s nothing fake or shallow about this

Rio: you have to fuck me forever to make up for the fact you had to ever wait

Buster: And I feel like I could love you for that alone, never mind the rest

Rio: I don’t need you to say it, you show it

Buster: words get twisted, I twist them, manipulate conversations however I like, whenever it suits me

Rio: you’re intentional, you said I can have everything I need, what more could I possibly ask for

Buster: Ask and it’s yours, it’s as simple as that

Rio: I know, daddy

Buster: We could have it all, I believe that would be as easy

Rio: you do?

Buster: don’t you?

Rio: I wanna

Buster: I’ll show you, the world was mine and now it’ll be ours

Rio: Okay, show me

Buster: I’ll put a ring on every finger, you couldn’t get married to some other cunt if you were desperate to

Rio: fuck, do it

Buster: you can have the first at Easter, I’ll bring it with me

Rio: you know why I want it, yeah

Rio: not because I’m a golddigger 

Buster: You’ll be richer than me, babe, the content you’re gonna put out, I’m not worried about you being interested in my wallet

Rio: I’ll give you your share

Buster: I’ll earn it, or it isn’t my share at all

Rio: You know what I mean

Rio: only fair if you’re half of what they’re there to see

Buster: I know it won’t be hard work doing any of it with you

Rio: I should hope not!

Buster: You’re adorable 

Rio: Yeah, I am

Buster: I’d do it for free but I’ll take my share and save for a house I seriously can move you into

Rio: 😍

Rio: If only

Buster: it’ll happen

Rio: but there’s no point moving me there now

Buster: I didn’t say I would, we can do loads better

Rio: I don’t mind coming to see you in halls

Buster: I should hope not, babe

Rio: 😏 just saying, probably the only way I’m experiencing it

Buster: There’s nothing stopping you going when you’ve achieved your other goals, you’re more than intelligent and hardworking enough

Rio: yeah well

Buster: I’m just saying, you could do it

Rio: I’d rather be distracted by you though

Buster: Well that’s easily arranged

Rio: go on then

Buster: [sending her the hotel booking confirmation he’s just done for where they said they wanted to stay at Easter, soz you won’t get to do it, huns]

Rio: I’m going to buy so many pretty things to wear for you

Rio: like now, too excited to wait

Buster: Good, it’ll keep you busy, I’ve got a flight to catch and I’d hate for you to think I’ve started ignoring you

Rio: Thanks for the warning, babe

Rio: I won’t go hysterical now 😘

Buster: [do go and do that sir so there’s obvs a pause here]

Buster: I like you hysterical

Rio: You missed it

Buster: I’ve missed you

Rio: [the number of days it is ‘til Easter] to go

Buster: You counted

Rio: I had time

Buster: How did shopping go?

Rio: I’ve made a start

Rio: but you aren’t getting any clues

Buster: Why not?

Rio: because it’s a surprise of course

Buster: but since you’ve only made a start there’ll be surprises left

Rio: 😖 rude when you know I can’t say no to you

Buster: It’d be both insulting and ridiculous if you wanted to say no to me

Rio: I don’t wanna

Rio: [send him some of the purchases you have made, you know the vibe, nothing practical]

Buster: I’m really proud of you

Rio: 😳 stop it

Buster: no, I am

Rio: you like what I chose for you, daddy?

Buster: very much

Rio: Good thing I know what you like

Buster: You’ve proved it and yourself

Rio: well, you have good taste

Buster: I know

Rio: Are you in the air yet?

Buster: [send her a pic of whatever part of the airport process you’re at idk cos I’m disabled and have to be there ages early and am also not rich, realistically I’m sure you’re on the plane already]

Rio: 🛫☁️💭🛬

Buster: Are you still in your friend’s kitchen?

Rio: Thereabouts, yeah, when I wanna go to sleep, I’ll probably go to the pub or somewhere, no point trying to get to mine

Buster: I don’t know whether to be impressed or offended that I haven’t tired you out yet

Rio: Be impressed, that works for me and you

Buster: Good answer

Rio: I like the idea of you being impressed with me 

Buster: I have been for as long as I can remember

Rio: You know you’re impressive, so I don’t know what I can say for the same effect

Buster: Don’t you know you are?

Rio: I don’t think I am yet, not that it’ll never happen

Buster: You are, and you’re allowed to acknowledge it while striving for more, it’s the kind of attitude that’ll only help you get there

Rio: You’re a good motivator

Buster: I’m just stating a fact, you’re a business woman, at our age that’s impressive

Rio: I’ve barely started but thank you

Buster: nevertheless, you’ve started, instead of sitting around talking about what you might do

Rio: Talking is just that, we both know that

Buster: yeah, and most people are all talk

Rio: definitely

Rio: it’s hard to relate to my friends like that

Buster: I don’t relate to mine either

Rio: You’ll find them

Rio: school is just, the dickheads you live near, you know

Buster: absolutely, and it’s almost over

Rio: Thank God

Buster: We’re both ready to move on, plenty of those friends aren’t

Rio: it’s sad, how some people are already clinging on so tight before its even over

Buster: sad as in embarrassing, sure

Rio: A lot of people get lost in their 20s, as long as they sort it eventually, then we can say embarrassing not sad

Buster: As long as I don’t have to express sympathy toward or interest in said people during their 20s, they can waste their own time and opportunities however they want

Rio: Not the friends I had pictured for you, no 😏

Buster: I appreciate that, babe

Rio: I’m not that bitch, anymore than you would let me tell you what to do

Buster: I’m not opposed to you telling me what to do

Rio: oh yeah?

Buster: there’s a definite time and place for it

Rio: Interesting

Buster: Think about it

Rio: I am

Buster: What would you like me to do then?

Rio: Is now the time and place? 🤔

Buster: You’d rather wait until we’re together again?

Rio: On the one hand, yes, because there’s more I could have you do but on the other, maybe I’ll be too shy then

Buster: Well now I’m not going to be able to stop thinking about how stunning you look when you’re blushing

Rio: [an adorable selfie]

Buster: I’m never gonna get over how fucking beautiful you are

Rio: It’s mutual

Rio: I keep looking at everything I have of you

Buster: Same, plus everything else you’ve posted, which is an unfair amount of content in my favour compared to what I’ve given you, and I would feel bad about if I didn’t already feel a completely different way

Rio: It is entirely unfair and if it wasn’t my only desire to make you feel that way I’m sure your feeling, I would insist you felt sorry for me right now

Buster: At least you can’t demand it by looking at me 🥺 because I honestly can’t resist when you do 

Rio: that’s a really smart way to ask me to send you more and more photos

Rio: [do a 🥺 photoshoot]

Buster: You’ve given me such vivid flashbacks [and obvs he’s recounting every time during their feral antics that she’s made that face but I’m not gonna go back and re-read rn so I can list them lol]

Rio: Vivid is the word

Buster: and I’m so turned on right now that it’s bringing back the memory of how wet you were for my bulge and your reaction to the tip of me

Rio: I’m as wet as that from nothing but the memory now too

Rio: you have such a hold on me, you know

Buster: I wanna hear you

Rio: [send that voicenote]

Buster: Jesus

Rio: good thing you remembered headphones

Buster: True, but it’s a shame some passengers would notice me using your underwear as a gag

Rio: another reason to earn private flight sort of money if I ever heard one

Buster: And book a [huge number here because the whole point is they can hook up for ages uninterrupted whilst still ending up at a destination they’d wanna be at] hour flight to [the boujee destination that he knows from her socials she hasn’t been before and he obvs hasn’t either for that first]

Buster: [then just describing said holiday under the guise of all the saucy antics they are gonna do on this long af flight and at the hotel and every landmark cos that’s the mood y’all are in rn but we both know underneath that you’re not at all casually planning a romantic summer holiday cos it’s never just horny nonsense]

Rio: That would be perfect

Rio: you are

Rio: say we really can

Buster: Of course we can

Rio: and we can [add more sexual exploits you’ve somehow thought up]

Buster: [add some more of your own too, boy, you’re both extra bitches]

Rio: alright, lets do it

Rio: I can take a solo vacation, no one will be asking questions about that

Buster: We’ll have both earned it after acing our exams 

Rio: I’m going to have to knuckle down

Rio: I haven’t always been that focused

Buster: You haven’t always had me rewarding you

Rio: exactly 😋

Rio: everything used to be more drama before this year too, when most of us realised none of that really matters, you know

Buster: Too many people have their priorities all wrong 

Rio: you’re telling me

Buster: but I’d rather tell you more about mine and how right they are 

Rio: I’m certainly not opposed 

Buster: [make some more plans for y’all’s summer that I won’t commit you to rn cos we can decide when we get there lol]

Rio: it’s the first summer of the rest of our lives

Rio: full freedom

Buster: You know we don’t have to wait until summer to do whatever we want though, tonight was the beginning of that

Rio: ‘course but all we wanna do will be easier living in the same city

Buster: What do you wanna do first?

Rio: tonight, or when you live here?

Buster: Tell me both 

Rio: I’ll tell you anything you wanna know

Rio: tonight I just want to keep going, not lose any of it, make sure it’s real

Rio: when you live here, I’ll have to take you out properly, show you what you’ve been missing out on, convince you how much you need me

Buster: Haven’t I convinced you yet how much I need you?

Rio: Never hurts to be doubly sure

Buster: I’ll do whatever it takes to make you as sure as you want

Rio: you know I’m sure too

Buster: yeah, I do

Rio: I told you

Buster: And you know you can tell me anything

Rio: Might take a while to get my head around but yeah, right back at you

Buster: A lot of what’s happened could have that effect if you let it

Rio: potentially

Rio: not going to change my mind though

Buster: good, don’t

Rio: we’re a bit past that

Buster: Ordinarily we would be, but like I said when you said you love me, all normal bets are off as it’s just me and you who can and do have any idea where we are and what we’re doing there

Rio: Well yeah, but we can’t just pretend to ourselves like it didn’t happen

Buster: We haven’t had that luxury for a long time

Rio: okay, true

Rio: I can promise you I have 0 desire to go back to how it was 

Buster: I swear I have no desire to either

Rio: I believe you

Rio: you’re not an idiot

Buster: I believe you

Buster: you’ve obviously learnt from your previous terrible relationships

Rio: that’s not fair, I can’t judge you for your crap choices

Buster: I’m not judging you, I’m judging them, which you’re perfectly within your rights and welcome to do

Rio: only if I had time or inclination to go through your tagged pics

Buster: you don’t need to pretend you haven’t

Rio: Shh

Buster: we’re definitely past that, babe

Rio: anyway, not all my boyfriends have been shit

Buster: Bullshit

Rio: you’re hot when you’re jealous

Buster: I am, but there’s nothing to be jealous of where your ex boyfriends are concerned

Rio: 😏

Rio: maybe not now

Buster: not at any point

Rio: that’s just mean

Rio: they’d touched me and you hadn’t

Buster: I could’ve while you were with them though and they can’t now you’re with me

Rio: not just them

Buster: exactly

Rio: you said with you

Buster: I did

Rio: 🥰

Buster: [a pic that’s like the equivalent of that and v 😍 just because and also if you were making summer holiday plans for a while there I could realistically say you’re getting off this short af flight and it not just be blatantly just a we’re on page 29 shh move]

Rio: that was too fast

Buster: Remember what a short flight it is when you’re waiting for me to show up for Easter

Rio: Who knew you were so positive 

Buster: You should know I’m in a good mood

Rio: I like to see it

Buster: and you like how much credit you can take for it

Rio: it helps

Buster: I’m glad because you’re gonna have to stay positive yourself while I’m heading home

Rio: I get it

Rio: no privacy in a car filled with your fam

Buster: I’ll talk to you soon, hold me to it

Rio: You will

Buster: yeah

Rio: talk soon then 🤎

Buster: Goodnight, Rio

Rio: Buster

Buster: I know

Rio: Sweet dreams then

Buster: you too, baby

[hellonoblesky]

Windswept Waves

#genshin impact #genshin leaks #genshin kazuha #kaedehara kazuha #I love one(1) man #hIS AESTHETIC PLEASEEEE #I don’t know if it’s because my birthday is in October or I just adore glowy leaves but I adore himmm #I have 2000+ primos saved I’m trying my best to save for him #Skipping Zhongli AND Yanfei my beloved for him it better be worth it #Like obv it’s gonna take me forever to actually level him up but he can be there for moral support!! #caps warning

[hwabang]

Hi can you do a reaction to Ateez falling in love with a foreigner girl who barely knows Korean :)

ATEEZ Reaction: Dating a foreign female who doesn’t know Korean

A/N: I’m back from my unofficial hiatus! This time with two functioning arms :) I’m so sorry this took me so long; kinda hard to do anything with a broken arm :/ Enjoy!

A/N 2: This is so cute~ I loved writing this one (insert emoji) I didn’t plan for some of them to be longer than the others, it just kinda happened (insert emoji)

Genre: Fluffity fluff

Warnings: Fem! reader, reader is new to Korean (knows a little but enough), take it as the reader lives in Seoul (maybe for work or school)

—————

Hongjoong:

When Hongjoong first met you he kinda already knew he was gonna fall in love

I mean you’re just that awesome💅

It didn’t take long for him to fall in love with you either

Eden was the one who encouraged Hongjoong to just go for it

He’d be hesitant to ask you out but not because of the language barrier

It’d probably be because he’s so busy he forgets to take care of himself, he doesn’t wanna do that to his s/o

Hongjoong doesn’t care that you’re a foreigner

He loves it a lot actually because it gives him a chance to learn English

He’s very confident in his English skills

Actually, his English is probably better than your Korean (but that’s okay!)

“Y/n, is my pronunciation correct? Ah really? Okay good.”

And he’d love to teach you Korean too

Sometimes he giggles when you get something wrong and softly corrects you

Other times he’s like, “Yah, how can you get this wrong it’s so easy.”

“It’s okay baby, we can try again later let’s take a break.”

Seonghwa:

When Seonghwa first met you he was attracted, he admitted that to Hongjoong

But he soon realized that he started actually having a crush on you and he was scared

(I saw a ‘Seonghwa as a BF’ post that said he dates to marry and I kind of agree!)

He was scared because although he wanted to pursue you, he was worried about the language barrier since baby’s English skills are intermediate :(

But Hongjoong told Seonghwa to go for it because he could tell Seonghwa liked you a lot

Practices English so much in his spare time so he can impress you next time you meet

Seonghwa himself said his English is intermediate, and from what I can tell, he understands English pretty well and just has a hard time speaking

So he definitely understands you when you speak in English, but he’ll probably respond in Korean unless he is 100% sure he can convey his message perfectly in English

Cute texts in English

Is also very patient with you learning Korean and ALWAYS offers to help

The type to have cute study dates in cafes with you, where you’re studying Korean and he’s studying English

And you’re just practicing on each other and asking questions

Forever telling atiny“My English got better because of Y/N~”

Yunho:

Yunho isn’t really good at speaking English either, so he would be a little cautious

But he also doesn’t really care; he likes you for you not for what language you speak

Probably would just learn like two flirty phrases to ask you out asdfghjkl

He really wants to learn English so he’d always pick up on phrases you use, and then use it with atiny to impress them

I honestly feel like Yunho understands English fairly well, so when you talk in English he’s not entirely lost unless you’re using very modern slang or big words

Like for example if you were saying, “Hmm… idk baby that’s kinda sus.” He’d be like, “... sauce…?”

Ahh it’s adorable pls admit that you love it

Also one to boast that he learns English from his girlfriend

LOVES to help you when you’re attempting to learn Korean

Is so so patient with you too, and helps you calm down when you’re frustrated

Yeosang:

Yeah no way he’s approaching you first

I mean ok let’s be honest he didn’t even tell the guys he liked you

Wooyoung noticed and told the whole group

They obv told him to go for it because they could tell Yeosang wanted to be more than just friends with you

Scared that when he uses his limited English skills to say something sweet, he’s gonna say something entirely different

Had to get a LOT of encouragement from 99 line + Jongho (especially Wooyoung)

Final push was Seonghwa and Hongjoong

Forces you to teach him English (not that you mind at all)

Your strictest Korean teacher too

“Nope. Get these questions right and THEN I’ll cuddle you.”

Approximately 10 minutes of his solo vlive is him preaching about how, “When learning a new language, it’s helpful if you’re dating someone who speaks said language because it’s much easier to obtain it than reading off textbooks.”

Tells atiny that’s the only reason he’s dating you Yeosang pls

San:

Literally does not care at all

I mean at ALL

San is confident enough in his English skills to become friends with people who don’t speak Korean

Same goes for a s/o

He probably talks to you more in English than in Korean tbh

Asks you to teach him modern slang so he can better understand atiny when they post on social media

If someone comments about his English being really good, he responds with something like “Thank you! My girlfriend teaches me!”

Constantly asking you questions

“Baby how do you say ___ in English?”

But he also teaches you too

“You know, in Korean, this is called ___!”

Mingi:

Oh boy

Mr. “I cannot Englishi” really don’t know what to do

Cuz like… he likes you a LOT

But he knows that it’d be hard for him to communicate with you

Because both his English and your Korean are at very basic levels

Definitely talks to his hyungs about it

Who in turn cheer him on to ask you out, and if you’re willing to try despite the language barrier then you’ll say yes

Spoiler alert you said yes

Asks Hongjoong to help him w his English whenever they’re both free

Watches a lot of YouTube videos to get the pronunciation down

Tries to teach you Korean but honey you’re better off getting a tutor

You think it’s so adorable how he mixes Korean and English when talking to you

Unfortunately, the Korean words he uses are the main words of a sentence (like nouns/adjectives) so you’re still hella confused)

But it’s okay because he’s so cute and you love him

Wooyoung:

Another member who has no confidence in his English

In turn, tries to teach you more Korean saying it’s more helpful because you live in Korea

But definitely tries to pick up English for atiny and so one day he can talk to your family

I think all of them would constantly ask you to translate certain words into English

I just think San, Wooyoung Jongho would do it the most

He’s not the best Korean teacher (sorry Woo)

The type to teach you a dirty sentence but tells you it means something cute

But he tries to help (when he doesn’t feel like pissing you off)

Begs you to teach him English because he wants to impress atiny

But complains so so so much

“Y/n~ this is difficult. You’re telling me read and read are spelled the same but pronounced differently, but read and red are spelled differently but pronounced the same?! English is hard!”

(English is hard Woo, it’s okay)

Jongho:

I’m sorry the first thing I thought of was, “Neck is very long and head is very small!”

I love Jongho. Anyways.

Was slightly worried when he realized he wanted to ask you out because obviously communication is key but that’s hard when you don’t speak the same language

But he gave himself a pep talk; saying how it’ll be okay since you’re trying to learn Korean and he’s trying to learn English

And he was right; you guys are going strong and your Korean + his English has significantly gotten better

To the point where you two can have full conversations in both only English AND only Korean

(I’m proud of you both)

Once your relationship is out he’s constantly bragging

“Yeah~ I learned English because of my girlfriend. I am a professional! And I am such a good teacher because she speaks Korean so well!”

Definitely does a lot more covers of songs in English now

Because he can check his pronunciation with you to make sure he doesn’t mess up

Also makes you help him write messages to atiny in English

Will sit down with you for 2-3 hours just to help you with Korean and he takes it pretty seriously (also brags about it)

“Hyungs! Look what Y/n learned today! I taught her!”

#ateez reactions #ps hwa #ateez #kim hongjoong #park seonghwa #jung yunho #kang yeosang #choi san #song mingi #jung wooyoung #choi #ateez fluff #ateez imagines

[cheekbites-moved]

ok i still havent gotten the secret ending but farming for it might take me a bit so im gonna make a thoughts post for age of calamity now:

Major spoilers obvs so ill put it under a read more

things i enjoyed:

revali beatdown simulator

the controls for the divine beasts are a bit clunky, but i think the angles they used for them did an excellent job at really making the player feel like we were actually controlling a divine beast. so i think it was done well.

link’s personality really gets to shine full force in this game with the amount of cut scenes and it was wonderful to see

every character clearly had a lot of love put into how they operate. they truly all feel unique, & all of their play styles fit them really well in my opinion

the game does a really good job of making you understand what a real threat the monsters are. like in botw they’re intimidating at first, but once you’re far enough into the game they become just an inconvenience to work around if anything. this game managed to actually make certain monsters intimidating for me again, and i think that’s a real accomplishment

the blight battles are actually somewhat challenging in this game and that is truly a commendable achievement lol i think all the bosses are good tbh. i didnt rly dislike or not enjoy any of them.

the way daruk and link’s friendship & urbosa’s motherly relationship towards zelda got to shine was. so good. it’s all i could’ve ever wanted

seeing the descendants again was really nice & it was awesome to see the champions interacting with them!! especially sidon and mipha omggggg. that was. really fucking good shit

kohga. just. kohga in general. getting to see more of him was really rad, he’s such a fun guy! and his english va was Excellent. you could really tell he was having a lot of fun playing him, and it was lovely to see! :)

zelda getting to really shine in this game was also lovely to see. and her being so assertive and badass by the end? omg. it was so wonderful especially after botw. man. 

the combat is done very well imo. im rly glad that they took so many elements from botw, but also added their own flares to make it feel fresh. it was rad.

sidon’s tagline is “winning smile” and his power is “boundless optimism” and i think that’s beautiful

the music in this game is SOOOOO good oh my god. multiple times during playing i had to pause to just appreciate it. it’s pretty much all remixes of botw with a few originals for the new characters, but they all slap. there was not a single song in this game i didn’t like. it is definitely one of my favorite video game soundtracks officially. maybe one of my favorite overall soundtracks in general tbh.

the visuals obviously look just like botw, but it still looked fucking gorgeous at some points. like. man. they really went off to make it look not only faithful to botw as far as appearance goes, but also as far as capturing botw’s beauty and it was. excellent to see!

if anything is true to botw’s backstory, it’s definitely how op link is. cause he was established to be op in botw, & when u finish botw he is also op as hell. he is so fun to play as the higher leveled he gets. he absolutely kicks ass. especially with a two-handed weapon??? daaaaammmmnnn. thats my badass baby boy!!!!

link eating rocks not once, but TWICE. just showing PEAK gremlin energy. 10/10 for those scenes they were great

the ending was really beautiful actually and i did cry like a little baby for it what about it

things i didn’t like:

obviously first and foremost.. this is not the game we were advertised. and no matter how much i overall enjoyed the game, it will always have some layer of being tainted attached to it due to the false advertising. this is not the prequel we thought we’d be getting. & not using “prequel” specifically doesn’t matter when all the advertising, including the box art talks about this being the story of what happened 100 years ago. with no indication it wasn’t the story of what happened 100 years ago in the botw timeline, but a separate universe/timeline entirely. i do hope we get dlc for the game at some point giving us what we were advertised, but at the same time... rly wish that the story that’s in the final game was dlc, & the story we were promised was the original :/ or just having the game have two separate storylines originally would’ve been cool. i just wish it wasn’t falsely advertised. 

fort hateno can fucking eat my whole entire shit WHY is that part so needlessly obnoxious compared to everything else oh my god

being forced to fulfill revali’s power fantasy TWICE hurt my soul

fuck any mission where you have to protect the useless hylian guards. i hate them. they suck.

the ai for player characters when you aren’t playing as them can also be pretty useless. it was really frustrating failing missions because my fellow party members weren’t helping me, and i was basically expected to be in two places at once to get shit done myself. :/ ik you can just switch between characters to make it easier, but like. i like playing as link the most. he’s my favorite character, & ofc since he’s mandatorily played for most of the story, he’s gonna be the most leveled up character regardless so he’s just the best to play as in general especially for harder missions. it was annoying to be forced to play as other people Solely cause the ai was so useless.

king rhoam’s attempt at a redemption arc. i’m not sorry that i just fucking hate this man. i don’t mind him entirely in botw bc you can see clear, genuine remorse during the cut scene at the end of the great plateau. but the redemption arc he gets in this game? after all the fucking shit he does in this game? especially when after his ~redemption arc~ i had to sit through a cut scene of him being an absolute fucking asshole to baby zelda after her mother just died????? absolutely fuck that shit. i don’t appreciate that crap at fucking all. he’s a verbally abusive piece of shit and i hate his guts.

obviously there was gonna be some retconning of how certain things worked in botw in order to make this kinda game work but the way sheikah technology works in this game is so goddamn confusing i do not get it. the works of botw are never outright said or explained completely, but it’s straightforward enough that it doesn’t really matter. this game does try to explain certain things and it just becomes. really clunky and confusing very quickly. 

the story is alright, i guess, but..... really confusing/convoluted as hell at times to a point that it’s. really fucking distracting. especially in comparison to how straightforward botw’s story is. like..... cannot help but be annoyed that such a problem wouldn’t have been a thing if they stuck to botw’s story.

i was sad when the egg thing died but i dont like the egg thing.... it is the MAIN reason shit was retconned so much & i just. dont get its purpose. but i did really like the reveal that zelda made it herself. that was good shit!

also the egg glitched out like. a LOT. idk what the fuck was going on with the poor thing but there was multiple times during a cut scene or when i was just sitting there that it was freaking out in the background and it was rly weird

elemental overworld boss monsters................. obnoxious. especially elemental guardians like goddamn bro what the fuck

i know warriors’ games aren’t about exploring anyway but the limitations for exploring was really sad/frustrating. this is still somewhat the world of hyrule before the calamity, which is something we’ve always wanted to see. not being able to explore even the immediate area at certain points because of shit like timed missions was really upsetting, man. :( i just wanted to see hyrule castle Before the calamity why was did they have to rob us like that.....

creepy corrupted egg’s transformation. why. what was that. what the fuck

even though i did enjoy the boss fights, it did get. incredibly taxing eventually to have to fight the SAME bastards so many times. like yeah botw is also guilty of this with the blights, but goddamn.... at least i have a choice to avoid certain encounters with them? this game has you fighting the same bitches like upwards of 3-4 times. it was. really annoying tbh. like the fights themselves are enjoyable, but damn we added new characters and it still inevitably lacked variety in boss fights.

no playable kass >:( if he’s available later in dlc then fine but i wish he was playable in the original game. so many random choices you’d never expect are. why couldn’t he also be there >:(

overall:

it will forever have that sour taste for the false advertising attached to it unfortunately, but that aside, i overall did enjoy the game! i think it has a lot to love in spite of the issues i encountered. as someone who has this as their first warriors game as well, it did lend itself to letting me see the appeal of them. idk if i’ll get more, but i do get why they’re so beloved/popular now. it was an alright time, with some amazing highlights that i’m gonna think back on very fondly for a very, very long time. if i had to rate it..... 7/10 

#hw #aoc #hw aoc #hyrule warriors #age of calamity #legend of zelda #botw #danni plays hw aoc #mine #long post #v long post sorry lol i have so many thoughts/feelings

[mychemicalxmen]

Hey so I think the whole “Ticket to Heaven” story beat was really rushed and under-utilized but honestly could’ve been the centerpiece of Klaus’s S2 arc so here’s a two-part proposal on a super self-indulgent and potentially controversial rewrite

(Do whatever you want with Destiny’s Children in this universe, I could honestly take or leave most of it but Ben/Jill is important to me)

Part 1: Basically, it’s mostly about Ben.

-Set up the concept of Going Into the Light sooner. The rules of death are under-explained in tua, and Ben’s second death would hit harder if we had background on what was happening.

-I would literally have Ben’s funeral (or an equivalent vehicle of exposition) show up in the first half of the season so we understand where they’re both at on the topic and get the vibe that Klaus still feels guilty about it deep deep down.

-I made a shitpost about this, but Klaus staying sober for three years with no clear external motivation to do so is... pretty sus. Especially when you remember what a wreck he was at the end of Vanyapocalypse week, even when he did have reasonable motivation.

-Therefore I raise you that his new drive to stay clean can be the want to keep Ben in the physical world (ig corporeal, for lack of a better term? but not really). Klaus has just established it was possible, and now that he’s in a strange new place where his brother’s his only familiar face, and said brother is expressing more and more interest in interacting with the living world, and goddamn you at least owe him that after how bad you screwed his afterlife up, he’s gonna give it his all.

(-Optional: since Klaus’s contact with Ben isn’t stunted when he turns to alcohol, we can deduce drinking doesn’t really affect his powers in a way that matters, but... what if it did? What if there’s a certain level of drunk after which point Ben can no longer interact w the physical world? Bc. That could be something. Honestly that could be everything. This is unrelated to my main point but. Ben accusing Klaus of prioritizing his little Heartbroken Pity Party over his brother’s needs. Klaus accusing Ben of only preaching sobriety so he can become corporeal again. Yo.)

-So keep those moments where the arguments ride the line between shallow bickering and a relationship gradually splintering. And make the day of Ben’s funeral One Thing We’re Both Thinking About But Won’t Acknowledge Out Loud.

-So in this world, the rules of Ben’s ghosty-ness are established early on, as well as the reason for the extra tension between the two brothers. Ben’s second death and final words for Klaus feel a little more cathartic because we actually know the lore we’re supposed to going in.

Part 2: [Insert sad Gene Pitney lyric here]

-I think that Klaus being dead-set on preventing Dave from enlisting was a bigger deal than the show treated it as. I mean, that’s some Grand and Selfless Shakespearean True Love Bullshit. He’s essentially deleting His Dave from existence. ig it’s significantly easier to swallow when you remember Klaus thinks his family is lost forever and he’s never coming back to the present, so any chance of him seeing His Dave again is out the window anyway.

-So he still goes into the hardware store to enact Stage 1 of his plan. Maybe drops some hints of his agenda right there.

-But after seeing that Allison is alive? And having reason to suspect Five is alive? And then actually seeing Five and hearing his plans to get them back to the future? Mm.

-Give Klaus infernal conflict over changing the past for most of Season 2. Because he’s not a saint, he still has selfish tendencies, and he’s been hopelessly in love with this guy for like three and a half years now, so if there’s still a way to see His Dave again, I mean...?

-If you want a true bastard moment, have a scene where he’s talking to Dave while he’s still all over the place about the issue and he kind of suggests that enlisting might in fact be a good idea. For whatever reason. Go as light or dark as you wanna.

-Obv at some point near the end his conscience kicks in.

-But here’s the thing! Ben parallels! Klaus struggling with handling his powers! But now instead of Fear vs Perseverance or whatever, it’s Clinging Too Hard to the People You Love (as ghosts) vs Letting Them Go Where They’ll Be Better Off.

-So when Ben talks about the Dave situation, we’re getting that Maaaaad Subtext.

-And whatever Klaus does in the end, it works, and Dave does not in fact enlist.

-I don’t know how he convinces him, or if his input accumulates with other factors in Dave’s life, there’s a lot of ways this section could go. But Dave somehow reports his decision to Klaus. Maybe thanks him? Maybe tells him how he’s gonna spend the next five years instead? Or maybe it’s just a written note left at the mansion? Whatever it is, this is a Really Weird Bittersweet Goodbye Moment for Klaus.

-And Klaus is ultimately relieved, but he has to deal with that. Whatever he was dreaming of to keep Dave around just wasn’t realistic. And this way there’s no question about whether or not he’ll show back up in S3. It’s just over.

(-I mean if he does as a twist, sure, whatever, go nuts Steven.)

-But I think it might be important for Klaus to take a moment and consciously let go of something he’s been holding onto through years of insane circumstances.

-Also. He just lost the two most important people to him in one season. So. This is how you set him up to either be reborn like a Wild West Flavored Phoenix or fuckin snap like an apocalyptic glow stick.

#tua #the umbrella academy #klave #kinda

[trensu]

Episode 34: The One where Detective Wangxian is on the Case!

WWX IS RUNNING FOR HIS LIFE!!

From Fairy the wonder dog, lol. The pupper just looks so pleased to be chasing after wwx.

Poor wwx gets himself cornered tho and jin ling looks all smug about it, the little brat

OMG I AM D Y I N G

Wwx: LAN ZHAN HELP MEEEEE

Lwj: *backflips into the scene with his scabbard held high totally ready to throw down with a kid*

Chill out, lwj, the kid’s like twelve

And as soon as lwj places himself in front of wwx to protect him from the big bad kid, wwx LATCHES ON TO HIM, 

GRIPPING LWJ’S SHOULDERS WITH ALL HIS MIGHT

AND HE’S ALL PRESSED UP AGAINST HIS BACK 

AHHHHHHHH

But lol, jin ling seems to seriously be weighing his options here?

Like, hmm, this is the great hanguang-jun so my odds aren’t the best but i got fairy the wonder dog and also my dad’s awesome Magic Ghost-Busting sword so…

Wwx: i’m so glad you’re here!

This is when lwj notices that wwx is actually cowering from the dog, not the child, and lwj levels a glare at the dog. Like, he really Glares at fairy.

Fairy NOPES right out of there bc animals have better self-preservation instincts than humans

Jin ling lets out this cute little gasp when fairy ditches him and then he glares at lwj

(pretty ballsy move coming from a kid, tbh)

Lwj, obvs, is completely unfazed and just gives him a cold stare in return

THEN JIN LING POUTS LIKE THE ADORABLE BRAT HE IS AND KICKS AT SOME BASKETS BEFORE STORMING OFF

LOVE THAT KID

(i mean, if i met a kid like that irl i’d probably hate his spoiled little guts, BUT BC THIS IS MAKE-BELIEVE I CAN ENJOY HIS BRATTY BEHAVIOR LOLOLOL)

Once the dog is gone, wwx makes this nervous little giggle (SO FREAKING CUTE) and peels himself off of lwj

Pretty sure lwj is like wait no come back, but like internally bc god forbid he express himself verbally

Wwx goes back to the mountebank and starts interrogating him about Plot Things

We’re gonna ignore all that chitchat and just watch his pretty face get all animated in detective mode

*dreamy sigh* wwx, so pretty so pretty

Lwj hasn’t stopped staring at him this whole time either! I FEEL YOU BRO

AHHHH WE SEE NHS BEING ALL MR. KNOW-NOTHING

“I DON’T KNOW, I DON’T KNOW, I REALLY DON’T KNOW. PLEASE DON’T ASK ME ME. I REALLY DON’T KNOW ANYTHING.”

LOVE THAT GUY

GIVE HIM AN ANCIENT FANTASY CHINA OSCAR.

Now we’re in a forest! This is MUCH better than the last time we were in a forest!!

OUR BOYS ARE WALKING SIDE BY SIDE TOGETHER LIKE THEY’RE SUPPOSED TO BE AND I AM OVERJOYED

They’re chatting about the nie bros, like omg can’t believe nhs is sect leader and his big brother dropped dead???

SUDDENLY THERE’S BARKING!

Wwx: DOG!!

AND IMMEDIATELY DUCKS BEHIND LWJ, GRIPPING HIS UPPER ARMS LIKE HIS LIFE DEPENDS ON IT

HE’S MAKING HIMSELF ALL SMALL BEHIND HIS HANDSOME HEROIC SOULMATE WHO WILL DEF PROTECT HIM FROM ALL THE BIG MEAN DOGS IN THE WORLD

Lwj: wei ying, there’s no dogs here

Omg wwx is clinging so close that his chin brushes up against lwj’s shoulder aND I AM SWOONING

Oh, but he lets go, all embarrassed and awkward

Lwj gives him a Look

Wwx: don’t look at me like that

Lwj: why are you afraid of dogs?

Wwx: don’t ask me why either

HE SOUNDS SO CUTE AND SULKY SAYING THAT AND HE’S GOT A LITTLE POUT

AND I’M JUST LIKE AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH SO CUTE I’M GONNA DIE

Lwj is a perfect gentleman tho bc he just accepts that wwx doesn’t want to talk about the dog thing and goes on ahead

But before lwj can get even 3 steps away, wws LUNGES for him and grabs his arm

Wwx: lan zhan! Alright, i’ll tell you, i’ll say it

He says this like lwj twisted his arm and forced him to or smth lol

Wwx: i was a street kid when i was little and often had to fight stray dogs for food

POOR BB!WWX :( :( :(

Wwx: thankfully jfm took me to lotus pier but he also made jc send away his puppers, just like i made jin ling do…

Wwx: they really live up to their blood; he hates me so much. Just like jc.

HE SOUNDS SO SADDDD

And then he sighs like resigned to the fact that his brother will hate him forever??? WHICH HURTS ME SO MUCH, LET MY YUNMENG BROS RECONCILE AND BE HAPPY, DAMN IT

Wwx: lan zhan, let’s go

2 seconds later he hears barking again

Wwx freAKING YANKS LWJ IN FRONT OF HIM AND THEN COWERS BEHIND HIM IN THE MOST ADORABLE WAY

Wwx: that really is a dog, right??

HE CLINGS SO TIGHTLY TO LWJ’S ARMS, I CAN’T

Lwj: it’s still far. Why are you hiding?

He asks like he's not absolutely LOVING having wwx cling to him

We get a wonderful close up shot of wwx’s face here, so please take a moment to admire it (so pretty, so pretty, i love him!!)

Wwx: just let me hide!!

Lwj: *lets him hide* it sounds like jin ling’s wonder dog. It’s barking, something must’ve happened

Wwx: let’s...let’s take a look?

Awww, wwx stutters that out and he’s all pale with fear but he’s still willing to go investigate BC HE WANTS TO MAKE SURE HIS NEPHEW IS SAFE DESPITE THE BIG SCARY DOG

I LOVE HIM SO MUCH

Wwx: h-hanguang jun, move. How can i move if you don’t move?

BC HE’S STILL ALL CROUCHED BEHIND HIM, SO CUTE SO CUTE

Lwj purses his lips here and looks back at wwx

Lwj: let go of me first

It comes off as kind of annoyed BUT WE ALL KNOW HE’S JUST UPSET THAT WWX IS GONNA HAVE TO UN-CLING FROM HIM

And now we get beautiful close up shots of wwx’s hands gripped ever so tightly on lwj’s fancy white outer robes and watch as they very reluctantly loosen and let go

He’s laughing all nervously aND CRINKLES HIS NOSE WITH A BASHFUL SMILE AND I’M GONNA DIE FROM THE CUTE OMG

I LOVE HIM SO MUCH

HAVE I MENTIONED?? BC I DO. SO VERY MUCH.

As soon as lwj forges ahead, wwx grabs him by the shoulders again and follows close behind lol

Oh great, more fog in a forest

Wwx: this is a disorientation trap! It must’ve been set by a human

Lwj: looks like the legends of walker ridge are not unfounded

(oh yeah, plot thing about a man-eating ridge which is why we’re in the forest)

Wwx: lan zhan look!

AND NOW WE GET TO WATCH THEM WORK TOGETHER

I LOVE WATCHING THEM WORK TOGETHER

LOOK AT THEM BEING BEAUTIFUL AND IN LOVE AND DETECTIVE-ING ALL OVER THE PLACE

And now we’re at a mysterious creepy bunker in the middle of the forest!

Fairy barks again and wwx hides behind lwj AGAIN and everything IS GREAT

Wwx: why can i hear the dog but not see it???

Lwj: the disorientation trap must be keeping it out

Wwx: would jin ling be kept out by the trap too??

Lwj: nah, if jin ling were out, the dog wouldn’t be freaking out

Wwx: makes sense *does that nose tap thing THAT I LOVE* sooo how do we get in?

Lwj goes to investigate and wwx lunges for him again

Wwx: ah! Lan zhan, wait for me!!

I AM LOVING EVERY SECOND OF THIS

Our boys find that the bunker’s been busted open and figure that jin ling must’ve done it so they go inside to look for him

We hear screechy noises of resentful energy

Oh no! Wwx gets all woozy from it!

Lwj: how is it?

Wwx: noisy

HE KEEPS HAVING TO PAUSE TO CATCH HIMSELF, MY POOR SUNSHINE BOY

Oh, he pulls out the evil-detecting compass to help guide them through the bunker

Following the compass, following the compass, compass tick tick ticks away

BLADES SHRINE

WE’VE ARRIVED AT THE BLADES SHRINE

Wwx starts calling out for his nephew and he and lwj start cracking open caskets like graverobbers, shame on them!

Wwx: weird. Why are they all blades?

GUQIN TIME

I LOVE GUQIN TIME

IT’S INQUIRY GUQIN TIME!! EVEN MORE FUN!!!

Wwx gets all excited: you’re associating with the spirit?

Lwj: *nods* he’s here

Wwx: ask him for me - what is this place, what is it for, built by whom?

Omg wwx take it easy, one question at a time plz

Ofc lwj just goes ahead and does exactly as his wei ying asks him

The guqin lets out a couple of notes from the spirit (FOREVER THE COOLEST WAY TO COMMUNE WITH SPIRITS)

Wwx: what did he say?

Lwj: idk

Wwx: ??????

Lwj: the spirit said ‘i don’t know’

Wwx: good for you lan zhan, you even know how to make me speechless now

Lwj keeps playing his guqin for answers

EEEEEEEEEE WWX JUST CLIMBS UP AND PLOPS HIMSELF ON TOP OF THE COFFIN THAT’S HOLDING LWJ’S GUQIN AND JUST SCOOTS HIMSELF CLOSER TO LWJ

I LOVE MY SUNSHINE BOY

So they keep interrogating the spirit and find out that the spirit knows nothing

Wwx: a spirit confined here and he knows nothing? It’s the first time i’ve ever seen a spirit like that

Wwx: lan zhan, could the spirit be...nhs?

HE SAYS WITH A HUGE SUNNY SMILE ON HIS FACE AAAAAAHHHHHH I LOVE HIM SO MUCH

Wwx: lol jk, don’t mind me. Lan zhan, how about asking it’s gender. He should know this

Lwj: male

Wwx: FINALLY a decent answer

They keep asking questions and determine that jin ling is in fact in the room even tho they haven’t seen him anywhere!

Wwx: could the spirit be lying??

Lwj: i’m here. He can’t lie.

Look, i know he means it bc spirits can’t lie through inquiry or whatever but i LOVE the implication that people simply cannot lie in the presences of the great hanguang jun

Lwj starts guqin’ing again while wwx searches the blades shrine again

We get a shot from outside the bunker and see the robes of a ~mysterious figure~

Ooooh, and we get an absolutely GORGEOUS close up shot of lwj’s eye (lovin that eyebrow, man) as he listens to the spirit’s response

Wwx: what did you ask him?

Lwj: his age and where he’s from

Wwx: what did he say?

Lwj: 16, lanling

WORRIED UNCLE!WWX (also, i guess jl is not twelve, but whatever)

Aaaanndd we find out jin ling is inside the wall of the blades shrine!

Lwj goes and cuts the wall to pieces with bichen like a badass

And wwx immediately starts digging his little nephew out

HE’S SO WORRIED FOR HIM

He’s calling his name out and lwj goes and gives the boy some spiritual energy since he’s all unconscious from being stuck in a wall

Lol while lwj is doing that, wwx grabs bichen and starts poking it into the dirt

Seems kinda disrespectful to bichen, if you ask me...but lwj and bichen don’t seem to mind so whatever

Wwx gets all woozy from the resentful spiritual energy again

He’s starting to piece things together when jin ling suddenly wakes up (kinda)

Jin ling like, zombie-walks himself back into the wall

Lwj and wwx look at each other like what the heck??

They decide they probably shouldn’t stick around so get out of the bunker

They spot someone running away from the area and wwx is like go catch them, lan zhan!

Lwj: i’ll go. You and jin ling…

And wwx is all, i’ll get him out of here and we can meet up at the tavern after

Lwj stares at him BC HE DOESN’T WANT TO LEAVE HIS SIDE, HE JUST GOT HIM BACK LAST EPISODE!!

But wwx is like, lan zhan go catch the bad guy before he gets away!

Wwx: i’ll be there. Lan zhan, take care

Chase scene!

Huh, nhs is pretty nimble on his feet, isn’t he?

Lwj chucks bichen at him but only manages to slice off a piece of his robes

THAT’S SOME NICE LOOKING FABRIC THO

I’D BE MAD AS HELL IF SOMEONE CARELESSLY SLICED UP MY GOOD FABRIC LIKE THAT OMG

Oooh, wwx got jin ling back to his room and noticed a curse mark on jin ling’s leg

He pulls open jl’s robes to see if the mark spread to his chest (it hasn’t)

Ofc jin ling wakes up just as wwx finishes doing that

Jl: whAT ARE YOU DOING WHY ARE YOU TAKING OFF MY CLOTHES

Good boy, jl, that is exactly how you should react if some strange guy tries to undress you when you’re unconscious

Wwx: why are you freaking out bro, i just saved you from that man-eating wall

And jl is all IMMA KILL YOU!!

And wwx is like been there done that, don’t really want a repeat…

Wwx sees jl’s jade lotus pendant and asks him about it

Jl: my mother left me this! Don’t touch it!!

See, jl is such a brat but then these little moments happen and i just want to hug him and bundle him up in blankets and make him hot chocolate…

HE’S SO STARVED FOR LOVING FAMILY AND AFFECTION, THAT POOR KID ;_;

We get a flashback to jyl giving wwx a similar pendant and wwx clutches at his robes in AGONY at the memory

Lol

Jl uses this moment to put on his boots and FUCKING BOOK IT RIGHT OUTTA THERE

GOOD FOR YOU KID, GOOD FOR YOU

DEF THE RIGHT RESPONSE AFTER ALMOST GETTING UNDRESSED BY SOME STRANGE MASKED DUDE

Cut to street view, wwx is wandering around trying to find jin ling but instead he hears jc’s voice and dives for the first hiding place he can find

LOL I LOVE LISTENING TO JC AND JL INTERACT

Jc is scolding jl ofc

Jl: don’t grab me like that, i’m not a 3yo!!

Jc: you think i can’t discipline you now?? EVEN IF YOU’RE 30, I CAN STILL DISCIPLINE YOU

Omg this is freaking hilarious, i love these two

Then jc asks him where Fairy is

Wwx is all smug thinking to himself: lan zhan must have driven it away

And the world is like, PSYCH FAIRY’S ACTUALLY RIGHT THERE IN FRONT OF YOU

Wwx almost avoided a jc encounter

He would’ve gotten away with it too if it weren’t for that meddling dog

At least we get to see jc use zidian. I love zidian.

We get a big reveal scene and jc finds out that mo xuanyu is Wei Wuxian, surprise!!

Oh no, sad/angry yunmeng bro time (I MISS MY HAPPY YUNMENG BRO TIMES, GIVE THOSE BACK)

They’re back at an inn or whatever and jc is really just tearing into wwx

We’re not gonna go into detail except for this bit - 

Jc: 16 years...and lan wangji STILL wants to protect you

He’s so mad

It’s giving me Emotions™

Jc: maybe he’s not doing this to protect you. Someone with such integrity couldn’t possibly tolerate you. Maybe he had a deal with the guy who saved you.

Wwx: JC! Watch your language!

LOOK AT HIM DEFEND HIS SOULMATE FROM SLANDER

Yikes, they keep arguing and jfc they really know how to hit where it hurts, don’t they?

A wild Jin Ling appears!!

He lies through his teeth to JC. like yeah, i totally saw wen ning in an abandoned shack really really far away from here, for real :D

Now jin ling is in charge of guarding wwx after jc ties him up with zidian (seriously the COOLEST spiritual tool)

Jin ling takes it right off 

I LOVE THAT THE ZIDIAN LISTENS TO JIN LING OMG

We get a lot of fun uncle wwx and nephew jin ling interaction here bc jin ling helps wwx escape into the forest

Oh look, another moment that makes me like jin ling

He helps wwx escape since wwx saved him from the killer wall

He has honor!

Also wwx apologizes to jl here for that time he stuck his foot in his mouth way back at the start of the series

Wwx demonstrates his A+ acting skills by pretending to have been caught by jc and jl whirls around in a panic and wwx knocks him out

He inspects the curse mark on jl and is all, hmmm, can’t undo that curse rn but i can totally transfer it onto myself to save my nephew

And that’s the end of the episode!

LOOK AT ALL THE QUALITY WANGXIANTICS WE GOT!!!

THANK GOD, WE DEF DESERVE IT AFTER ALL THAT PSYCHOLOGICAL TORTURE WE ENDURED IN THE LAST FEW EPISODES

*hugs episode to their chest, sobbing* I’VE MISSED YOU SO MUCH, DON’T EVER LEAVE ME AGAIN

Return to Masterpost

#WangXiantics #wangxian #the untamed #cql

[blacknovelist]

sup ok here’s the promised details on uhhhhhh All for One in @guardianlioness​‘s and I’s Ageswap Mess, formed by collaborative headcanon jamming on discord and then roughly paraphrased via a run thru the unfortunate Quadruple Lengthening Filter that’s built into my brain bc I’m incapable of being brief.

(something of an expansion on this post and this ask. Nooooot spoiler free, actually pretty spoilers, idk, will pop it under a readmore bc who knows how long I’m gonna go on also)

ALSO!! I can’t at u but @randommly-passing-mia u asked forever ago about Toshinori and AfO’s relationship in this AU and i answered what I could then but I’m pleased to announce this goes more into that bc I knew Very Little back then. :)

So, All for One! Now, I feel it appropriate to note that the previous post I made regarding the history of OfA in Ageswap, as well as just about everything I’ve posted abt AfO and OfA for Ageswap (except for the linked ask above, obv) was made before the arc with the League of Villains and Shigaraki’s backstory all came out. Now that we’ve got some of those contexts, we can go a little further in fleshing everything else out, which we did, a little, today.

Pls keep in mind that Ageswap’s goal is not and never has been to make a direct 1:1 translation of adults to kids and vice versa -- good lord we’d have a lot of empty spaces if we were doing that. So, uh. Anyway. it’s time for “we make a mess of the characters and also the timeline and the plot because it’s Our City Now”

Student AfO is a different creature to small Toshinori of our au. For the purposes of this post we’ll call him AfO, because while I’d love to just jump into referring to him as Shigaraki there’s a lot of confusions that lie down that road. Also, again, we’re calling mr heckhands mcmike Tomura, because Shigaraki is a name with Weight.

Because canon parallels, Ageswap AfO has a little brother who we’re making Kyudai Garaki/the Good Doctor and also quirkless for our purposes (whether he’s AfO’s biological brother is up in the air, we haven’t settled yet). Garaki has something of an intense obsession with quirks, constantly studying and doing research, not unlike Izuku, and the age gap between him and AfO is... about six years. Now, because AfO had already manifested a quirk of his own and that quirk had fearsome potential, One for All was originally going to be passed on to his brother, because before Ageswap Izuku, OfA had strictly been handed down to trained members of the family.

Tomura was a member of the group that had, through the generations, been working to fight against the users of One for All. To hit them where it hurt, he attacked Izuku’s mentor’s (we’ll call them the Mentor) home with a group of League fighters. When he found out there was a quirkless boy, and a second one who was all but quirkless for all that he’d been told to avoid using his own powers, he quickly took them in under the League’s wing -- both in an act of cruelty against OfA and out of some misguided sympathy for the boys.

The fearsome thing is the toxicity of the relationships Tomura formed with the League, and eventually with the boys. He meant well, when he took them in, but whatever this version of him went through... well, just about all his relationships are some level of manipulative and unhealthy by default. See: his tendency for physical closeness and being tactile, as mentioned in the ask.

He’s firmly of an opinion along the lines of “if you’ve got the power, and you know you have the power, and you’re not using it to do whatever you can or want, then why do you even have it?” and, for all of AfO’s childhood, Tomura tried his hardest to share this with AfO and sway the kid to his side. With the Mentor having dropped off the grid and abandoned the Shigaraki name in grief, AfO and his brother had nowhere else to go, but AfO was a smart and cautious kid: he couldn’t just listen without a fight, or a reason.

(AfO didn’t know Tomura meant to kill them, that he attacked their home on purpose. When he eventually finds out, he firmly believes Tomura meant to save them)

But Tomura’s persistent, and he doesn’t stop, and eventually he points out: if All for One is a quirk that allows him to take and give quirks, does that not mean he can seek out the perfect quirk for his little brother? All the reasons he’s suffered, AfO has the power to fix that.

That’s the thing that sways AfO to their side, that convinces him to stay with the League and learn under Tomura. Because if it’s for family, isn’t it worth it?

(AfO sees Tomura as a teacher, as a friend, as someone beloved and important. Shigaraki was AfO’s name, but it can be Tomura’s too, if Tomura wants. Then everyone knows they’re family. And Tomura accepts it -- another spit in the face of an enemy, a welcomed token from a beloved student. Shigaraki is a good name for the rest of the world to use, but Tomura, Tomura is a name for the League and the League alone.)

AfO tries, at first, to find other quirks for his brother while he trains, while his brother studies (while Tomura tries to sway Garaki to their side also, because look at what you know, what you could do with that knowledge, combined with your brother’s quirk, you’re so young and so so smart-). OfA is gone beyond the League’s sight, in the hands of the Symbol of Peace, so there’s no point on dwelling on it, really, surely another quirk would work better?

But then One for All comes back around, in the hands of this blond... nobody. His brother’s quirk, running around in a stranger. AfO continues to hunt potential quirks down for his brother and his brother’s studies, but he has a new goal: to try and claim OfA back and give it to who it really belongs to.

the problem of course being that he can’t take it by force like every other quirk, and killing Toshinori would merely render it lost forever.

Essentially, AfO’s primary grudge against Toshinori is the fact that he’s the current bearer of a quirk that, in AfO’s eyes, should belong to Garaki. And Toshinori’s quirklessness, or past quirklessness... is easy to know when you know the secret of One for All.

Some good stuff gets said abt AfO vs Toshinori in this answer here I think, and I’m drawing on it: Toshinori’s more instinct and heart to AfO’s logic and strategy. That’s not to say, obv, that neither of them draw on the other quality, but it’s what stands out most to me about the two of them and just, kind of their general dynamic (or at least, that’s how it seems).

USJ was a subtle message laid beneath a louder declaration. Two-for-one, if you will. “Wouldn't it be so nice to have a quirk that fit better in your hands? that didn't fritz or go funky whenever you so much as turned your head? A quirk you might not even have to coax and strain and train and change your body for?”

But AfO does not confront Toshinori until much later, until after the sports festival. See, the mall incident in this AU is a scene on bargaining.

He confronts Toshinori at the mall -- his face is not known, and it’s a simple matter to pull him off to the side. But there won’t be fighting here today. No, he only came to talk.

Questions, first. About Toshinori, his experience with One for All, what he thinks of other people’s quirks. About what it was like for him, growing up quirkless, left abandoned by so many people for it. Eventually, his conversation circles back around. I have a little brother. He’s quirkless, just like you. You know what he went through, what he suffered.

All for One even did his research, is even willing to play by rules closer to Toshinori’s own: tucked under his arm is a folder, with lists upon lists of people. Villains with sentences for life, villains under the death sentence, people who would have no life of returning to the world ever again. People who don’t have a reason to use their quirks any longer. People for whom it wouldn’t matter if he took their quirks anyway. “Take your pick,” he offers Toshinori. “I’ll give you whatever quirk you’ve ever wanted. I’ll even take it from a villain so none of your precious civilians have to suffer the loss — but that one belongs to my little brother.”

And, well. We all know he says no.

Why would Toshinori hang onto a quirk that isn’t even his? All the people out there, bearing the quirks that his brother and even his greatest enemy were robbed of at birth, and AfO has the power to grant both Toshinori and Garaki the power that they’d dreamed of, that belongs to them. He knows what it means to suffer without a quirk. Why won’t Toshinori let him fix that?

and idk specifically what Toshi would say, but I think it’s something along the lines of “no one asks for what they're born with or given, but we make the most of it anyway. That's how we're supposed to live.“

Anyway Toshinori and All for One hate each other SO fucking much but. Unfortunately, also just kind of Get Each Other on some level. Like, they despise one another but also, if there’s one thing they can believe in, it’s that the other will always Be The Way They Are. Friendly Enemyship, if you will.

There’s some level of pity that AfO also holds on the percieved coldness of Toshinori’s relationship to his mentor, Izuku. Izuku is... really awkward, in his relationship with Toshi, and while Izuku loves his student very much he has a hard time showing it -- and Toshinori thinks so poorly of himself, it’s hard to grasp how close they are from the outside sometimes. AfO totally tries to recruit Toshinori to their side, even after he figures they’re Tight and also even though he knows Toshinori won’t ever say yes. Like, he hates the guy, but that doesn’t mean he wouldn’t be a kickass ally.

Tomura would like Toshinori and AfO says as much to his face. “You’re more like him than I am, anyway. You can act without overthinking. And he wouldn’t care if you were quirkless. He doesn’t with my brother.”

(Toshinori hates that. He isn’t, he isn’t he isn’t like him at all.)

Tomura has also more or less promised AfO that, at the end of his lifespan, his student should take on Decay. AfO, of course, doesn’t want that and is on the hunt for a good longevity quirk to give to his mentor

In the end, the way All for One is kind of being played in this AU is something not so far off from Anakin Skywalker.

In Lioness’ words:

Noble in his desire to keep his family alive

But horribly misdirected

#Boku no hero academia #BNHA #My hero academia #mha #Ageswap AU #Blacknovelist talks #BNHA AU #BNHA Spoilers #long post #fukc this is long #All for One #AfO #Shigaraki #also technically #Toshinori #yeehaw yall

[jlf23tumble]

Fic rec anon here, and I'm blanking in the moment! I know you have a lot of recs and I love them all. Maybe your favourite AUs? Broadly speaking? Seeing some of them might help jog me into more specific categories ! xx

Gotcha, sort of like my prison rec list, only I like to think of it more in terms of what would I have on my phone to read when I’m bored and traveling, lol. Obvs, this sort of list is super hard, but having it focused on AUs kinda helps? At any rate, this isn’t a deep dive, it’s just my top level, so hopefully it’ll spark you. These are in no particular order, so come back if you want more!

Tuxedo Dress-Up, by Blake (honestly, ANYTHING in this fandom by Blake, I file this one under hot and hilarious, but every line is just swooooon). Louis is an aspiring song writer by day, a makeup artist for drag queens by night, and masquerading as a full-time real estate agent for his third most famous (and first most handsome) client Harry Styles.Or, five times they fail to fuck in a closet, and one time they get it right.

Once Upon a Dream, by objectlesson (again, ANYTHING by Phoenix, and most of it is canon, but where to even start with her AUs, jesus god, I struggled to rec just one, so I went with the AU she gifted me, ilu!!!!). “M’not gonna half-ass our fake relationship,” Louis almost snaps, voice sharp with a defensive edge, like Harry wandered too close to a bruise with needy fingers. “Now kiss me again. We’re gonna make every shitty tourist here wish they had stayed in the Midwest. We’re gonna burn Disneyland down with our gay.” Or, a fake dating AU where everyone is lying and they happen to be at the Happiest Place on Earth.

knock knock, i love you, by @thelovejandles aka beautlouis (another one of my fave authors in this fandom, proof that wips DO finish, and they’re absolutely worth it). Harry and Louis get kicked out of a statistics exam for passing a knock knock joke note, and subsequently fall in love. Harry's a virgin, there's a cat, a hot cocoa date, a lot of sex, even more knock knock jokes, and everything is lovely and happy.

Tied Down, by @ham-palpert (the twists and turns here, my goddd, just masterful) The most interesting case in Liam and Niall's careers falls directly into their laps, courtesy of an epic fuck-up of one Harry Styles, partner to the almost-infamous drug dealer Louis Tomlinson. The investigation yields an unexpected yet satisfactory outcome for Liam and Niall. For Harry and Louis, however, things are far more complicated.

Alien Roadtrip! by @helloamhere (needs ao3 account; I love desert roadtrips, and this captures that vibe perfectly, plus it’s hilarious). For the first time in his life, Louis doesn’t know where he’s going. Harry doesn’t mind. Or, a roadtrip with desert feelings, too much snack food, and empty motels. Harry is definitely absolutely not an alien. That would be ridiculous.

Harry Styles Cooks..., by @magicalrocketships aka sunsetsmog (aka the very best wip on earth, I weep with joy whenever I get the notif). In which Louis Tomlinson can’t cook, there’s a very special shower curtain, and Harry Styles used to be a baker. Or Louis owns all of Harry Styles’ cookbooks, and he never intends to cook a single thing out of any of them.

just call me inspiration, by @hereforlou (in which I *am* Liam Payne, porn editor!) The truth is Louis knows he’s going to hell, if there is such a thing, but it isn’t because he writes erotic fiction for a living. If anything, it’s because his muse, the reason he’s inspired to write about people shagging in increasingly creative ways everyday, is the sweetest, loveliest, most genuine (and completely oblivious) future children-book illustrator in the world.

Buried Like Treasure, by @becomeawendybird aka quickedween (marcel marcel marcel!!!). Prince Harry Styles is very private. He chooses to keep himself out of the public eye but feels lonely and isolated while surrounded by people in his hectic royal life. When he finishes his dissertation, he decides to take a solo holiday to one of the royal family's properties in the Swiss Alps. Semi-retired thief Louis Tomlinson has been pulled in for one last job: steal a painting from an uninhabited mansion. Neither one of them expects a natural disaster.

into another serotonin overflow, by @mercutionotromeo (this story packs a LOT into a little, it helped inspire my sideblog with smaller fic recs, actually). Harry's the yearbook photographer who's been assigned to take pictures of Louis, the new captain of the football team. Harry's got a massive, obvious crush on Louis and somehow, Louis feels the same way.

Turning Page, by @daisyharry aka purpledaisy (pretty much every on-set picture I see of Harry these days just makes me tag it for this fic). “You wanna buy Harry a drink?” Louis lets his eyes drip back to Harry, to his wide eyes and the way his shoulders curve down. He really is pretty – Louis will be the first one to admit it and the last one to ever say it out loud. Louis almost smirks and his lips twitch as he tilts his head, “Not particularly, no.” An AU where Harry Styles tries to get lost in a place he’s never been. Louis Tomlinson has been perfecting the art of being lost for years. What they don’t expect to find is each other.

hush. by wankerville (this story is achingly evocative of just about every shitty small American town, but my god is it beautiful, the sweetness of how it ends). “I don't like you like that, Harry.” “See,” Harry starts, Louis can hear the smile in his voice, “that's where I think you're lying.” Or an AU where small towns suck, louis is losing it, and harry’s just too perfect.

Three French Hems, by @gloriaandrews and @100percentsassy (I wish I could pick just ONE of my top three from these two, but alas...do persimmons smell like come? discuss).  In which Louis is a designer at Burberry and Harry spends December wearing Lanvin… and Lanvin… and Lanvin.

Thought the Song Was Sung, by @gloriaandrews and @100percentsassy (see above, pretty much, and how happy I am that the tweets still show up! with Dame Julie Andrews even!!). Louis never auditioned for the X-Factor. Years later, Harry's just another gay ex-boybander who lives alone with his cat... until Niall decides to take matters into his own hands and set up a profile for Harry on a dating website.

Wild and Unruly, by @gloriaandrews and @100percentsassy (Iconic, even the abstract is iconic, everything still holds up. oh for cute, etc. etc.). Harry is a cowboy sitting on the biggest oil reservoir in Wyoming, and Louis is the paralegal assigned to pressure him into selling his land.

Are You Gonna Be My Girl? by loadedgunn (another one that inspired my sideblog dedicated to short fics! So much greatness packed in, Jesus, it’s in my top five for sure). Louis reenacts his first time, and Harry wants to be his good girl.

“burn this flame” by @rainbowninja aka rainbowninja167 (anytime I reread this, I smile...filed under hot and hilarious). When Harry gets invited to play in a celebrity charity match with Louis Tomlinson, Manchester United's star player, he's determined to impress him with brilliant football skills. The only flaw in Harry's otherwise foolproof plan? He has absolutely no football skills, brilliant or otherwise.

Challenging Nature: A Look into Male Lactation, by @jaerie (hands down, one of my fave kinks, handled fantastically well...and this isn’t the author’s only one!).  Even taking into account all the bizarre things Harry has subjected himself to in the past for the sake of an article, Harry has received his strangest assignment yet. It comes up as a random misunderstanding in a meeting and builds into a conversation — can men breastfeed? Internet searches reveal documented cases of male lactation popping up at different times throughout history, but are any of them true? Can a man will himself into lactating? Harry has two months to make it happen.

like how your hands feel me up and down, by ballsdeepinjesus (this author wrote a lot of my faves back in the day, I have so many ~thoughts about the amazing writers in this particular era). “It’s -- you’re tight,” Louis chokes. “It’s tight, I mean. It’s. Yes.” His hand is curved around his hip now, squeezing lightly. “Tight’s good, right?” Harry murmurs, batting his eyelashes. He almost can’t believe himself. “Very good,” Louis grunts. Or louis works in a halloween shop and harry needs a costume.

baby look what you've done to me, by ballsdeepinjesus (see above; even the username kills me). The next day kind of turns everything upside down, though. Louis gets another lingerie catalogue addressed to Harry. He’s about to toss it when he sees a personalized note stuck to the front; it thanks Harry for his previous purchases and offers him a complimentary six-month subscription to their magazine free of charge. Or louis moves into harry's old flat. harry gets a lot of mail.

Take Our Bodies Higher, by @littlelouishiccups (I’m something of a connoisseur of the phone sex trope, so the way this author flips it and makes *Harry* the operator plus what ensues? chef’s kiss!). Harry wasn’t often caught off guard at his job anymore. He called different men Sir, Master, or Daddy for work almost every week, but he’d never been told he was a good boy in a voice quite like that. In which Harry is a phone sex operator and Louis dials a wrong number.

Make a Dime Go One Hundred, by @screwstyles (I’d rec this for their jobs alone, but everything in it, just wow). “Do you think you could trust anyone enough to have full control over you?” he asks into the night, hoping his sentence won’t break their bubble. It doesn’t, if the way Harry’s eyes meet his is any indication.“What do you mean?” Harry’s voice is barely above a whisper, rough from the singing they had done earlier. Louis wants to keep this memory forever.“You know, if someone wanted to, uhm,” he coughs, “to tie you up, or blindfold you.” Or a friends to lovers AU where Harry volunteers to help Louis experiment with bondage. Things don’t go exactly to plan.

it ain't trickin' if ya got it, by sarcasticfluentry (needs ao3 account; I often stare at the wall and wonder what another installment in this universe would be, fuckkkkk, it’s so good, I only wish the social media was still in it). 28-year-old blockbuster actor Louis Tomlinson rushes home to give his 20-year-old model boyfriend Harry a good seeing-to after a particularly provocative Instagram post and, in his excitement, alerts the entire world. Featuring daddy kink, anal beads, and feelings.

If You Asked Me if I Love Him (I'd Lie), by allyasavedtheday (needs an ao3 account; it’s a sequel, but I reread it over and over vs. the first piece).  Or the one where Harry and Louis eloped but neglected to mention it to anyone. Meanwhile Lottie is getting married and the only way for them to not steal her thunder is by pretending they're just friends for the weekend. Featuring Harry and Louis as terrible liars who don't know the meaning of the word platonic and some Tomlinsons and Styleses who definitely don't believe them.

Damn, I could go on, but I’ll stop! My sideblog dedicated to short fics is @marathonficbreak, and it has some smaller ones, if this is too intimidating, lmao...hope some of them are new for you, enjoy!

#fic rec #long post #i do have deeper dives but this is a nice representation of my fave AUs #one direction

[underwaterwoods]

so i saw the star war

spoilers ahoy

i guess this is just gonna be random bullet points

* i actually feel pretty chill about it. yay for being spoiled. also like.... if you ignore the ridiculous stuff there’s actually a lot to have fun with in this one. i don’t know how i’ll feel about it once i’ve processed it more. i just know i had fun while watching it, which i know isn’t true for everybody. i totally understand the negativity - it all makes sense to me. i’m just glad i sort of.... FORCED myself to have enough distance to just go in like ‘i’M PrepArED fOr wHAtEveR’

*i did like all the jumping around between locations in the first half and how ben would show up everywhere rey was. what a ‘you’re everywhere i go’ pairing. /chef’s kiss/. also having the different locations gives a sense of spaciousness (even if it’s all happening over a short period of time) which i missed in tlj.

*one of the things that gave me the most joy as the hux thing ??? X’’’D it was EXACTLY like that ‘the farce awakens’ ep where hux LITERALLY JOINS THE RESISTANCE cuz he can’t stand kylo. like what kind of fanfic...... how do the hux fans out there feel? (i really love the hux fans they’re a great bunch XD). shame that he was gone right after though.

* i actually enjoyed the trio dynamic? like i get the desire to move away from ‘trio mentality’ but the rey/poe tension with finn as mediator was fun. and finn and poe as joint generals? adorable. shame that the whole finn/poe thing got a bit clouded by.... stormpilot baiting and rose erasure and all the things... Also i’m not anti any character - i like zorii - but.... let poe stay a gay icon? i guess he can still be a queer icon it’s all good i’m down for whatever.

*speaking of finn.... loved seeing more of his humour back. didn’t love that there was no unpacking of how he feels taking out stormtroopers. but loved the found family of jannah and the other ex-stormtroopers. i feel like that gave SOME resolution/depth to finn’s origins. and finn being a non force user but seemingly super attuned to the force and its ways? i can roll with that.

*more speaking of finn... i wonder what they were doing with the ‘thing he wants to tell rey that he never gets to tell rey’. seems like an obvious ‘i love you’ thing. but at the same time we got reylo (/basks in that for a second/). it feels to me like throwing a bone to the finnrey people? like they didn’t get it in this movie but it could be a thing in the future? regaurdless, i did like how finn and rey were very connected and back to that loving friendship they had in tfa. we never quite got the ‘you have a force bond with the supreme leader?!!’ conversation but we got.... SOME conversation.

* speaking of the supreme leader... kinda love that we got renperor AND ben solo TM. i prefer to view ben more holistically (he is both ‘ben’ and ‘kylo’) but i get that making them two distinct identities was a helpful shortcut of sorts. he could ‘kill’ kylo and switch to being ben in a single scene. i always prefer Soft Boi Ben but if we were gonna get Bad Boy Kylo i’m glad they established it right out the gate. it was like ok, this is what to expect; this is where we’re at with this character. 

*ben with his costume change at the end....... omg. gave me BIG smuggler!Ben vibes. urgh, give me all the AUs. ben deserves more.

*the amount of swagger when he was fighting the KOR

*idk i feel like i’m not even touching on the big stuff. this was just a ‘get all my side thoughts out of my system’ post.

*adam’s smile after the kiss though......... ...  /the most beautiful thing in this world/

*truly iconic that people were right about the strategic, covert introduction of force healing via baby yoda like one month before tros.

*oh yeah it was wILD that so much of the imagery from the trailers/tv spots etc was in like the first five mintues of the movie ??? i totally assumed the ‘i have been every voice you’ve ever heard inside your head’ moment would be climactic rather than right up front

*oh yeah the vader mask.... that didn’t really mean anything in the end then did it?

* re: ben’s death. maybe it’s because i was braced for it but in some ways it’s the best way he could have gone. he was definitely happy and reunited with the light - both through love of rey and of his family. hIGHKey could have done with ben’s force ghost also appearing at the end? the only good thing about not seeing it is.... LF deciding to retcon his death ? ??XD obs they’re not gonna but if you want a crackpot silver lining there it is.

*what exactly does rey’s future look like, may i ask?

* oh yeah, Passing The Saber Through The Force. maybe my favourite moment. the force bond as a bare concept is so romantic to me i would watch a whole trilogy just exploring the magic system of that - it’s limitations and possibilities. 

* i do like that jj developed the visual style of the bond. we got to see them occupying the same space, the way each of them would be seeing the other (’can you see my surroundings, i can’t see yours, just you’)

*i miss that rian johnson sound editing on the bond though..... god, the iNTIMACY of the tlj bond scenes....

*’i DID want to take your hand’

*also just the word choice of ‘take your hand’/ ‘i offered you my hand’. it’s extremely marriage.

*there was also a moment in the hanger when ben was like ‘we’re one’ basically? he was saying it in the context of rey’s lineage but still...............the validation. one soul. 

*palps was like ‘you live and die together’ which made me REALLY think of skytalkers podcast. obviously assumed they would both have to LIVE together but.... /deep sigh/

*blah this could go on forever i’ll add more later

edit #1:

* OH YEAH! reverse anidala was such a thing! why did it have to be SO reverse anidala though? X’D instead of taking her life, he gives her his own. (i know it’s not clear anakin totally killed padme etc etc but ya feel me)

* ok i hate that ben died obvs obvs but, taking that for what it is, it was very romeo and juliet. i kinda love just the imagery of it. like... the physical blocking/choreography of adam getting daisy into his arms, holding her, then he falls and it’s her holding him. the way she catches his neck. really reminded me of the smoothness of the bridal carry. and rey’s flexed foot in that moment of shock. love the body language. back to that kind of ‘’staccato’’ rey of tfa days.

edit #2:

*lololol @ LF trying to establish how ‘bad’ kylo is by having him kill a bunch of people in the beginning. it was just.... Hot.

edit #3:

* rose deserves better. obviously. she looked so good though. i like that she had some moments with connix too. 

* ben called han ‘dad’......

*ben standing there, overlooking the waves, with his leG EXTENDED BEFORE HIM. wanderer above a sea of fog. wanderer above a sea of foggg.

* rey having compassion for the snake thing. we been knew. kinda nice to have it in there. obviously good set up for ~later force healing shenanigans~

* OH YEAH OH YEAH. i kept thinking about atla. i know people have been making comparisons to it from the start and i’ve been DEEPLY INTO those comparisons. but it was truly a blessing for me to remember.... there is a version of this out there that you love and that is Good Content TM. legit i can just go watch atla again to heal from this. omg yeah cuz REY HEALING HIS WOUND ALSO HEALED HIS SCAR. very crystal cave.......... nah but nah but - the ‘you are every jedi’ was EXTREMELY avatar-esk..... like, engage avatar state. i don’t like how it ended up being the same old conflict between jedi and sith - ‘good’ and ‘bad’ - OBVIOUSLY THE POINT IS TO INTEGRATE THE CONFLICTING PARTS OF SELF; THE SHADOW SIDE; TO TRANSCEND OLD DICHOTOMIES - but i did love hearing all the voices from past jedi. that’s some good ‘the ancestors are with you’ shit.

edit #4:

* i think the first thing we hear rey say is ‘be with me’? ngl i was like ‘pls be invoking the force bond’ X’D i am a clown. that was a beautiful shot though. and love that a version of the bond kicked in like two seconds after that. 

edit #5:

*there’s that bit where reylo are fighting on the death star ruins and he’s winning and rey kinda falls to her knees panting and lowkey defeated and, not to be a shallow bitch but..... it was Hot.

*also dark rey......... was HOT. SHE WAS SO KIRA, WHATEVER THE FUCK THAT MEANS, AND I WAS INTO IT LIKE HNGGGG

*obvs i wanted rey to be truly no one. but casting jodie comer as rey’s mum ? ????? urgh, pefection, i love it.

*palps was so random i stg..... his plan was.... convoluted to say the least. 

*also who was under all those hoods?

*the KOR just kinda... being around again was hilarious. no explaination required. the boys are back in town. ben facing them without a mask and essentially wearing his pjs? loved it. 

edit #6:

*seriously though ben’s redemption outfit.............. /heart eyes emoji into the sunset/.......... you can see his collar bone.............. /cares about the important things/.................

edit #7:

*one thing i loved about the reylo was how Space Wizards TM they both were in this movie. it so highlights their connection by making it clear that they are each other’s only peer. i thought it would be a thing of ‘why is the supreme leader constantly interacting with/going after this girl?’ but it’s not because it’s so clear that they are the only two people on each others’ level. no one would dare question the fact that they’re constantly circling each other in a lustful murderous rage.

#tros spoilers #tros reaction #3 #4 #5 #mtp #the rise of skywalker #star wars #this is messy as hell #just getting some thoughts down

[punkscowardschampions]

Mattie & Lulu & Dolly (mostly)

PlanityPlan: Okay, so we wanna get down what Mattie, Lulu and Dolly are like, that’s the main point

PlanityPlan: but then we wanna pinpoint the time of this reunion for their storyline together, so we can then say what Jay is up to, Beckett not really ‘cos he’s a child but we could also say what we wanna do with you eventually here because we are planning to use him but yes, kind of unrelated but not

PlanityPlan: So it’s like, individual story, what they’re like, the lives they’re living, and then the storyline we’ll do with them together

PlanityPlan: OKAY so Mattie doing an accelerated 2-year Maths and Computer Science degree at Greenwich (57, 58) and then her PGCE which takes a year and in this year you do 2 school placements, 2nd placement at the girl's new school after gay teacher drama in Surval, so this 2nd meeting after first failed attempt at contact, in 59

PlanityPlan: Basically, energy being, making contact before starting Uni and the twins are like nah and then we show up at their new school (accidentally) and the twins relationship has suffered so now we have an in

PlanityPlan: OKAY OKAY so Mattie reaches out Summer 57, she's about to start Uni, the twins are 14 and just finished year 10, 58 teacher stuff to happen and come out year 11, 59 we move to new school year 12, Mattie starts placement too

Junie B Jones: The school I found for the twins is called Surval Montreux in Montreux Switzerland and they’d have been going there from age 12 (and leaving at 19) it’s obviously an international school but there’s a heavy focus on French in lessons as obviously because English is usually a 2nd language, but don’t even worry ladies cos there is only a maximum of 10 girls (cos it’s only gals) in your classes and 60 in the entire school

Junie B Jones: worth noting the finishing school bit from 17-19 cos your mother would love that for you and you can share a room no problem as it’s usually 2 or 3 anyways

PlanityPlan: So, do we be evil and say they have to share with another poor gal?

PlanityPlan: ‘cos we could run with that

Junie B Jones: that poor girl requesting a transfer cos they are so odd hahaha but yeah I say there’s potential there even if it was only for a while like maybe it’s lowkey a version of how they put me and Trace in separate classes cos the teachers are like UM

PlanityPlan: I see that, forcing you to stay involved, ‘cos with 60 people you’d have to be all up in each other’s business, like you’re for sure meant to see the teachers as friends/fam too

Junie B Jones: the website was very culty and that energy

PlanityPlan: which brings me to my first idea ‘cos I think it works on many levels beyond being a cliche

PlanityPlan: Okay so, I thought it’d be interesting to have a secret between them ‘cos how hard it’d be to keep

PlanityPlan: and then I thought that it’d be hilarious karma if Dolly had an affair with a female teacher but we actually let it go there

PlanityPlan: ‘cos it’d be a massive scandal even your parents can’t ignore and the girl gives off some gay vibes and it’d be like, a thing they can’t share in if Lulu isn’t gay like we share a boyfriend but we’re not sharing this teacher moment

PlanityPlan: and it’d probably get you both kicked out so we can time it when we want it and Chloe would be fuming about this lesbianism lmao

PlanityPlan: so with the whole culty school like this would be NEWS ‘cos they’re tight with the teachers clearly so it’s like ARE THEY ALL BEING GROOMED lmao

Junie B Jones: Lulu gives off the straightest vibes EVER so I am down & also the vibe that she would love that culty school

PlanityPlan: right so not only have you kept a love affair and gay from me, you’ve also ruined our school moment, it’d really shake them and their weird twin energy to it’s core, which is the fun of it all obvs

Junie B Jones: I see now why you agreed to share a boyfriend hun, also the potential for her to have a gay awakening with the roommate so hitting all those cliches

PlanityPlan: right, I’m not being gross but it’s true that all-girls school girls experiment together, facts, like Lulu probably joined it with it too but it’s like oh you actually like girls for real

PlanityPlan: but if Dolly isn’t just then living her best gay life and is trying to get shit back to how it was, I think it makes it different

Junie B Jones: the tea and also it seems like the kind of school where a teacher would go there, especially if it’s a younger/artsy one like that film Cracks that Imogen Poots was in, soz Nancy but most teachers won’t

PlanityPlan: it’s a cliche with posh schools for a reason, the bond is closer by the fact there’s not 30 kids in a classroom, there’s more opportunity for it to happen because you have actual relationships with all your teachers, whereas in normal schools they barely know your name lol

Junie B Jones: gross but necessary question being how long do you see the relationship spanning in secret before the big reveal

PlanityPlan: it should probably be somewhere between enough that it’s an actual thing that happened and not like, it happened once, like the teacher probably thinks they’re gonna be together if she doesn’t go to jail lol, but not so long that it is like, how’d you not know

PlanityPlan: it’ll be fun to like, play out, see how long we feasibly could

PlanityPlan: and if Lulu finds out before EVERYONE finds out, then she has to decide what to do with this info for a bit too, which would also be good

Junie B Jones: I love that because the twin vibe is very much like oh we can read each other’s minds haha bitch you thought

Junie B Jones: totally can picture Lulu snitching on you ngl gal

PlanityPlan: accidentally fucking yourself over when they kick the lot of yas out, a mood

PlanityPlan: NEW CO-ED SCHOOL IN SURREY, STILL BOARDING

PlanityPlan: maybe Lulu does care more about school in general, but also specifically that school and being one of the girls forever

PlanityPlan: ‘cos then it’s gonna be hard to win her back when you end up in another school, with boys dundundun

Junie B Jones: she very much comes across like that to me, not only because she’s clearly the clingy controlling twin here but I think she clearly likes how small and family like this school is trying to be cos of how chaotic and lacking their home life is, she’s definitely scared of boys & navigating socialising with them without making a tit of herself because of how little dealings she’s had so it’s gonna be a SHOCK

Junie B Jones: dobbing her sister in because 1. You think the teacher will get sacked and it’ll be over 2. You think you can score some points back and stay in the school’s good books

PlanityPlan: It’s honestly sad how much sense it makes, like you really buy all in with the family vibes and then ya twin fucks it all up, rude

Junie B Jones: okay idk how plausible this is but remember in Wild Child aka the greatest film of all time that boy is like the headteacher’s son, what if the boyfriend (Danny Griffin is his IRL name but I’ll give you a french af one in character boy) they share is like the son of someone who works at the school (obvs he doesn’t go there but like he’d have to live nearby and generally loiter) which is part of the reason Lulu picks him cos all the girls would want to but also she could tell him something about this and he’s like UM you have to dob her in

PlanityPlan: I see that, they can’t all be spinsters like this is an enid, they’d have families and stuff, I can vibe it because again, a thing if there’s any male in the vicinity we all lose our minds lol

Junie B Jones: and like obvs that’s why she got with him but there’s potential for an actual relationship to form with this boy on some level if we want

PlanityPlan: Yes, maybe you actually like him, because clearly Dolly doesn’t, have him to yourself hun, but also then you’ll have to move so rude

PlanityPlan: Another reason to be fuming when you were the clingy twin before, role reversal

Junie B Jones: and another reason to not want to leave because I can’t imagine that your parents will move you to another school in Switzerland because it’s tiny and the scandal so literally in a different country

PlanityPlan: yeah, we’d probably move you to the uk like we’re going to be more involved like doubt that lads but you know

Junie B Jones: my thoughts exactly

PlanityPlan: so the question is do we want to do this before Mattie gets in contact or after

PlanityPlan: I’m leaning towards before so then 1. You’ve got a chance of getting in but 2. You can also help or not help them get on better terms, whatever we vibe

Junie B Jones: maybe when she first gets in contact it’s a secret still so we get the best of the both worlds, cos like you’re gonna get stonewalled then hun but when it all pops off you can be there

Junie B Jones: just cos I’m thinking if it’s all happened by the time they’re 16 that’s slightly drama but then again we’ve done worse lol

PlanityPlan: That’s a good idea, it makes the most of it for sure

PlanityPlan: I’m not sure what the age of consent is but that might affect how in deep shit this teacher gets

Junie B Jones: it’d be a way to show how their dynamic and relationship changes from a POV that isn’t just their own

PlanityPlan: for sure and then we can have the outcome be not just down to their new school and their parentals

Junie B Jones: poor Mattie getting way more drama than she expected

Junie B Jones: are you having her go to a UK uni because obviously relevant because this isn’t getting resolved in a summer hol

PlanityPlan: I’m kind of vibing no uni, honestly

PlanityPlan: because a lot of gen 4 do go and it isn’t the only option

Junie B Jones: love that for her tbh

PlanityPlan: So yeah, you’ll be around for sure

Junie B Jones: do you have a job/career in mind yet?

PlanityPlan: not really, like I see you being a bit lost in that sense, which is fine because you’ve got a lot in other respects and you’re looked after, but it’s definitely a vibe of not knowing what you want to do, but not just doing uni ‘cos as most people in that situ do, so you probably have lots of random jobs

Junie B Jones: that’s legit cos loads of people don’t know what they wanna do but don’t have the luxury of taking time to figure it out but she does & lowkey it doesn’t matter if she never does cos like you said she’s fine in a lot of other ways

PlanityPlan: like I won’t let you be insufferable with it and not work and just bum about but you’re just striking me as work-driven, which a lot of characters are again, so I’m not mad

Junie B Jones: I like it

PlanityPlan: So it’s just working out what your actual main motivation is, which I think could be tied into getting in contact with this fam

PlanityPlan: as we’re saying Jay doesn’t really want to, so it’s a difference there

PlanityPlan: and it’ll be good to have it not a total failure if you do make something with the twins but we know you won’t with Chloe so there’s the struggle with that

Junie B Jones: it pleases me because the obvious and cliche thing to do would be to have Jay be the one trying to do this as she actually has memories of and issues with Chlo whereas Mattie is basically Ava’s child

PlanityPlan: and I don’t think it resembles like, Edie’s feelings about Drew and Caleb etc either, it’s not like I NEED you to be my mum because you biologically are

PlanityPlan: it’s just lowkey a curiosity like, people can’t just vanish from our lives like that, like what are they doing, ‘cos you know their main house is still in London too, like it’s just like, why shouldn’t I look into this

Junie B Jones: agreed, it’s not coming from a place of having a deficit, she’s happy and has everything she needs in that sense, so it makes sense for her to only gain from it

PlanityPlan: and it is naive but that is how I vibe her being in a not really annoying way lol, not a jaded character though

PlanityPlan: and it will be shit when Chloe is Chloe but it won’t destroy her or anything it’s just like oh god, what is wrong with her though

Junie B Jones: and that’ll strengthen her relationship with Jay because she doesn’t wanna talk about all of that and you’ll get why in a way that you can’t unless you experience the crazy that is Chloe for yourself

PlanityPlan: exactly, like that can be a source of strain between you when you’re first deciding to do this

PlanityPlan: and you’d give Chloe a few chances ‘cos like I said you aren’t looking for a mum so you’d be trying to lowkey work it out and being empathetic so she’d probably actually love that ‘cos she’s a narcissist so it’d be a bit dicey

PlanityPlan: suddenly wants to tell you every drama in her life like poor me

Junie B Jones: how real

PlanityPlan: ‘cos you can think you’re like objective and just putting the mystery together but you’re gonna get dragged in, clearly

PlanityPlan: especially combine this with the twin drama which you do genuinely care about

Junie B Jones: mhmm, Lulu is gonna drag you in gal, not like she can bring these emotions and drama to her new school when it’s a scandal and this is supposed to be a fresh start

PlanityPlan: which is what you were warned about/one of the reasons we left it ‘til you were grown but you’ll have to work this all out, which will be good

PlanityPlan: ‘cos you can’t be dealing with your younger sister’s drama instead of living your own life but clearly at a point here we are ‘cos bit lost

Junie B Jones: you’re so clever boo, this is such a good idea that flows

PlanityPlan: heheh, I think it makes sense if you’ve had such a chill upbringing and the twins have not that this chaos can take over your life and drag you in

PlanityPlan: I’d like to think we all get to a healthy place gals but we’ll see tbh

PlanityPlan: as for who Dolly is… I think she never bought into the school as hard, like it’s probably better than home, not that we’d know, but we’re not like omg this is IT

PlanityPlan: same with the boyfriend clearly, none of it is as real but the twin bond is so like may as well until the gay drama comes along

PlanityPlan: but then that’s lowkey over before it’s begun so then we go into overdrive of trying to win her back

Junie B Jones: which Lulu is not having sis

PlanityPlan: like in reality we should accept our truth and start working on separate personalities but we’re like no no

Junie B Jones: potential for how far aka too far she can try and take winning her back, like that creepy book energy

PlanityPlan: deffo, like we’ll have to think of ways but if we’re going all-in on this, there isn’t reason not to

PlanityPlan: ‘cos we don’t care about school or whatever mum and dad are saying or doing

Junie B Jones: not gonna kill you off gal but oh the possibilities for danger cos lbr your grandparents can’t stop you either clearly

PlanityPlan: bless them they’re alright people but obvs a bit useless for all this to happen lmao

Junie B Jones: hence I vibe that Lulu totally walks all over/ has them wrapped around her little finger like Chloe did but more subtly because she has no nuance

PlanityPlan: deffo, oh lads

Junie B Jones: which is a shame when they could literally give you the family energy you want without need for a creepy cult school but hey, you’ve been taught to treat them like that

PlanityPlan: exactly

PlanityPlan: they should’ve lowkey took you in but we’re too posh for that and you’ll probably be fine right lmao

Junie B Jones: at least Dolly can stay with them when her parents are literally hate criming her

PlanityPlan: sad that you won’t ‘cos getting back in that closet so hard like will you forgive me if I’m straight and we’re still the same

Junie B Jones: it’s really sad like this isn’t sustainable huns and shouldn’t have been allowed to be a thing for this long

PlanityPlan: at least Mattie does have fresh enough eyes to be like, respectfully, maybe let’s not do this

Junie B Jones: just like Lulu don’t haze your sister thank you

PlanityPlan: right, I think this gives us energy to go on for all y’all

PlanityPlan: *** so the energy now is she can get more drawn in because she's literally there living at the school too, and after the placement, she's getting a permanent position at the school, so we can actually work through this together and have relationships etc etc

#gen 4 #mattie pemberton howard #dolly blossom farrington stone

[servingliesarch]

there are some people who probably think i’m exaggerating when it comes to how badly merlin felt, and how much he lost, and i know there are, i got questions about it, so let me provide you with a list of what merlin life was like and why he fell into a pit of despair even tho being strong enough to keep his shit together.

born into a world where his sole existence was a crime, had to hide who he was from day one, never knew his father or even who he was, fearing he might be a monster because there was no one like him

born into poverty even though without great purge, though most likely be never born, he’d also be titled accordingly and respected for his station and level of power

had to leave his home at eighteen, sent by his mother into the heart of a kingdom ruled by a man who committed a genocide on his people

was appointed a manservant to his son, who though they did develop a very important relationship eventually and were meant to change things, was a mean bitch to him for a significant time they spent together

had to fight countless monsters, kill people, fight battles, drink poisons, get beat up, saving everyone’s lives countless of times but never getting any thanks or recognition for it

while also having zero friends who knew the truth about him in the castle

he lost his childhood friend will early on, to a pointless death he probably blamed himself for

was constantly forced to make life and death decisions, choices affecting the grand scheme of things without any support and no recognition for it whatsoever

had to constantly live a lie because otherwise he would be sentenced to death and executed, and even if he wanted to tell people, people who were his mentors constantly told him to shove it.

legit died a bunch of times and went back to life. would have been dead at eighteen if he wasn’t immortal.

met freya, whom he was willing to love, even run away with, who could understand him and knew the truth about him, got killed almost immediately after.

was subjected to believe morgana, who was his friend, would turn bad and betrayed them, so he had to poison her.

learned the truth about his father, got to know him a day before he died and had to save the day once again without knowing it, using his new dragonlord powers.

made a new friend, gwaine, who was this great person but of course he had to be sent away bc Uther i guess.

still zero recogniton, zero thanks. a lot of being killed or hurt or whatever it is.

morgana was in camelot then and he knew she was going to hurt them all but there was nothing he could do.

got legit sat down at arthur’s right hand, but you know, only like when no one sees because it makes sense that arthur who values his friends no matter who they are, elevating them to have a voice and have his back, knighting even strangers, marrying gwen, would not do shit about his closest friend merlin, whom he sat at his right hand.

you’d think things were getting better and merlin had friends finally, and lancelot was there where he deserved. oh right now, because then dorocha happened, and he died, and then lancelot went and died in arthur’s place, and they didn’t even have a body to bury it.

every time he hopes arthur might see magic in different light, shit happens and backtracks him like ?? so hopeful he will see that if merlin as dragoon saves uther even tho fuck should be dead, but morgana’s thing backfires, so he loses hope rly.

naturally one takes a hint and can no longer tell anyone his secret. do your friends notice you become distant and alienated tho? no. fuck character development.

oh, arthur’s uncle is a traitor in love with morgana who almost got gaius killed and no one would listen to you? yeah. that happened. it was great.

stabbed more times. died more times as well. zero recognition, arthur still refuses to listen or acknowledge most of the time. keeps saving the world, and it gets a bunch of people killed by him.

legit zero friends at this point when you’re being reasonable.

so like, he saves the last great dragon egg, helps it be born, hopes for once that dragons will not go extinct, but then kilgharrah fails to care for it, and dragon betrays them siding with morgana which could be okay if aithusa didn’t get crippled and wouldn’t live for like five seconds later.

murders arthur’s uncle but that one felt good for once.

his friends? knights, a queen. merlin? a servant. mordred, who was a druid and arthur met? a knight. the round table? is there but merlin stands at the back still. so what arthur listens to him the most, he has zero Real Voice.

is hardened, burdened, there isn’t much left of that young boy from season one in season five. legit depressed when you look at the signs.

and shit is going down so all of this destiny is back on him, with looming war and arthur dying, and morgana, and mordred there who will kill arthur, having more respect than merlin, and it’s all really fucking hard.

uther’s ghost comes back to haunt them and like....... i guess at least he got to like, tell him off so it’s not as bad.

gwen gets possessed, a bunch of people die including people he grew to care about because of morgana’s doing, plus fearing he might lose gwen after all. saves her tho, but still zero thanks.

merlin’s still extremely alienated from everyone tho.

they lose elyan, who’s gwen’s brother and who was always so kind to merlin.

almost dies again, is gifted a prophecy from his followers he literally never meets bc why let merlin have friends. so, arthur will die and war is neigh. great.

they lose mordred, who tells morgana what he is, and it wouldn’t have happened if perhaps merlin actually had a real voice but i guess not.

so anyway, the war comes, merlin seemingly loses his magic, sees his friend gwaine for the last time and rly misses a significant part of the battle in which arthur is mortally wounded. but at least he gets back his magic, tho morgana did him dirty there.

so anyway, wins that war, finds arthur, arthur’s stabbed, merlin after ten fucking years reveals his secret.

takes two days to get over it and the entire arc of this episode deserved to be more than just on episode for both of their sakes since arthur was dying.

merlin has to kill morgana for good and it’s terrible. he blames himself for her.

arthur dies anyway, and like why does he even have all of this magic.

has to give him a funeral and send the only weapon that can kill him away as it is his duty, all the way to avalon.

finds out gwaine is dead too which is just the worst blow really.

kilgharrah is also seen for the last time, because he’s old and has to die so it’s just  a lot of loss all around.

and they achieved nothing but the dragon makes it like they did, which they didn’t, and then doesn’t even rly warn him he’s not gonna die, tho he probably already figured it out. like give him something solid, not like a maybe thing that MAY happen but who knows, and when ?? WHO KNOWS

then obvs other things happen, but the truth is merlin stops aging, can’t die, but everyone else do, so he’s rly just subjected to an eternity of watching everyone he’s ever known die, everything he’s ever known disappear and he’s alone forever, no dragons, disappearing magic, the last of his kind.

#( meta. ) #it's not even all of it but lmao #aNYWAY #♦ ┆ ᴛᴏ ʙᴇ sᴘᴇᴄɪᴀʟ ﹠ ᴘʀᴇᴛᴇɴᴅ ʏᴏᴜ’ʀᴇ ᴀ ғᴏᴏʟ ( character study. ) #rant tw

[goron-king-darunia]

Tagged (by vague gesture of “if you wanna do it, TAG!”) by @biophilie like, 2 years ago, so I’m finally doing it. Rules: Choose any three fandoms and answer the questions, then tag 10 people you want to know better.

My Three Fandoms: Legend of Zelda, Tales of Symphonia DotNW, and One Piece since those 3 have taken up big chunks of my attention over the years. Would do Darkwood since it’s a current interest but since there are so few characters, it would make the meme here harder so... Darkwood will have to wait.

The first character you loved: LoZ: I was a slut for Link as a kid, TBF I liked most protagonists, but I liked Link a LOT. DotNW: I actually liked Ratatosk a lot at first because he was cool and mysterious and tough! My first impulse was really liking Richter’s design but the first character I loved/really liked based on gameplay and actual characterization was Ratatosk. One Piece: I really liked Red Haired Shanks and was sad when he didn’t really show up again for a LONG time.

The character you never expected to love so much: Loz: There’s a few so I’m gonna cheat a bit. In OoT and MM, Ruto and Skull Kid were just kind of characters that existed but I didn’t like much. Didn’t actively dislike them but didn’t really bother taking an interest in them. But I like them a lot more now, especially with how they’re characterized in “non-canon” material like the Manga and Hyrule Warriors. The only other character I can recall from the game series that I was surprised that I liked was Peatrice from Skyward Sword. At first it was just like “Oh, yeah, she’s just the girl who stores your items, whatever. She’s neat I guess.” But then she started changing. She got more cheerful when Link came around more and showed an interest in him and when she asked if he liked her I just couldn’t say no! And then she just became so obnoxiously bubbly and happy about it and I LOVED THAT SO MUCH. Unironically I ship Peatrice and SS Link because, like, Link and Zelda are great friends but they don’t interact much since Link has to try to save her and Zelda has goddess things to worry about. Peatrice is just always there and unlike Zelda who already has a good rapport with Link at the start of the game, you get to SEE Peatrice warming up to him and I am SO soft for that! SO SOFT! Actually, one more also from SS. Groose. He’s an obnoxious, selfish, gloating bastard man, but by the end of the game with all the changes he went through, he totally grew on me as a cool dude. Especially with how he and Impa got along.  DotNW: Slight cheat here too since the character didn’t debut in the game but... Colette. I honestly didn’t like her that much in Symphonia. I just kind of viewed her as an object that motivated Lloyd for a while and the impetus for everything happening in the game and it wasn’t until the end of Symphonia that I really started thinking of her as more than just a ditz that Lloyd happens to like. I’m not really sure when it happened but I started really appreciating her after DotNW, and not really because of anything she did. I guess I just eventually noticed a lot of her finer points and all the ways she contributed and how her kindness is actually super refreshing and hopeful and how soft that is considering what she’d gone through. See also my next point on Nami because hooo boy I was kind of a shitlord kid and needed to get through some things... One Piece: Nami. I HAAAATED her when I was young. Partially because of internalized sexism (probably shit I learned from sexist media, my dad, and just the lack of trust I had for any girl that wasn’t my friend because of massive bullying as a kid, but I digress.) and partially because one of the biggest parts of Nami’s arc early on was her utter betrayal of the crew. Like, we find out WHY later, and obviously I TOTALLY get where she was coming from now and all but as a kid that was just UNCALLED FOR. I also HEAVILY viewed her as the “no fun allowed” type that was actively impeding my new fave, Luffy, from having all the fun he could want because that shit costs money and the money is HERS. As a broke Millenial, I now 10000000% get where Nami is coming from and her financial responsibility is honestly hella impressive because she absolutely DOES NOT withhold the treasure from the rest of the crew, she fucking BUDGETS it. In general, I tended to dislike a lot of leading females for being catty or killjoys or a lot of other things when honestly, they were just being completely normal humans. Glad I grew out of that shit because while Nami still isn’t my fave, she’s fucking amazing.

The character you relate to the most: Loz: It’s changed over the years. I relate to Ruto a lot more now because yo, I would also just fuck off into the gut of my people’s patron Deity if my dad was being a pain and trying to marry me off (okay, so this is Manga exclusive, sue me) and 10/10 would give a precious family heirloom to a cute boy that rescued me. But more than that, IDK, she’s just... a lil’ spoiled but in a cute way, a lil’ tomboyish, but overall, for a Princess, she’s just kind of doing her thing, she’s responsible when it matters. But for OoT, y’all KNOW Darunia is my patronus because DAYUM. Chunky but strong (I’m a wuss but shut up), Grumpy butt but cares about his people, actually totes a fun dude when he’s not stressed about a food crisis, says “fuck you” directly to a fucking evil asshole despite the consequences, treats a fucking 11 year old kid like a full human being (I do not agree with leveraging a kid to fucking fight a dragon but... Link could handle it so...) names his own kid after Link because why the fuck not, befriends anyone that does him a favor and treats them like family. Dude’s just got chill old man vibes and I dig that shit. 10/10 relate to just being a fat dude that is grumpy but also wants to befriend everyone. HOWEVER, I think my top tier relatable character is Midna from Twilight Princess because that bitch is just me. Cursed to be a hot bitch trapped in a cute chunky body (I am working on myself. XD) 10/10 spoiled and bitchy as fuck, cheeky lil’ asshole who’s actually very sweet, think’s Link is dumb but also cute, cares about her world but ALSO cares about Link’s world, a lil’ selfish but also HELLA selfless because she cared more about Link and Zelda than her own life and cared more about her people than her own safety because she just fucking WENT TO FIX THAT SHIT when Zant started causing trouble, even though she didn’t have to. She’s everything I am or aspire to be. 10/10 one of the best Zelda characters. DotNW: Hard to say. I identify a lot with aspects of Richter, Aster, and Emil. I don’t have a lot of self confidence and am a bit of a shy bean, lil’ grumpy, but also a complete goober and an idealist, 10/10 would walk into hell for someone I love without thinking twice and would make deals with demons to try to save someone I care about because I am a dumbass. I love the DotNW boys because the DotNW boys are me. One Piece: Chopper. I just really fucking vibe with the whole “nobody likes me EXCEPT HOLY SHIT SOME PEOPLE SOMEHOW LIKE ME, WHAT THE FUCK DID I DO TO DESERVE THAT?” thing he has going on, as well as the whole glutton for praise but telling people to shut up when they praise me thing he has. I for real wanted to be a doctor when I was younger BECAUSE of Chopper. I’m just a weird little bean that doesn’t fit in anywhere very well while also being a slut for praise and wanting to take care of others and help them because other people have cared for me. Low key also vibe with Usopp because dude absolutely gels with kids, is a huge fucking wuss but deals with it anyway, will literally fight someone over petty shit and then come back and fight side by side with his bud’s again.

The character you’d slap: LoZ: Mmmmm. Hard to say. Like, obvs the villains but IDK who else I’d really want to slap? Does it count if I want to slap Anjuu/the Cucco Lady but, like... gentle and on the butt and in a sexy way? IDK, man. I’d feel bad but maybe Slap Mido? He looks like a kid so I’d feel REALLY bad for it, but aren’t Kokiri literally just kids forever? Asshole could be 100 years old, man... Either way he’s kinda a brat. 10/10 would slap early-game Groose from Skyward Sword also, but I’d feel bad about it because he ends up being a decen guy later. Also would slap Ghirahim for being both sexy and evil. DotNW: Alice for deciding that “never being weak again” means treating everyone else like garbage, even though I 1000% get where she’s coming from. Richter for being a fucking dumbass and not asking for help and deciding that demons were a good option and manipulating a child older dude with a magic core was a great idea even though I would do the exact same thing in his shoes. Ratatosk for being a murderous prick and starting the whole thing even though I absolutely understand where he’s coming from and I would also probably accidentally smite someone if I was a fucking spirit and in a shit mood because the only thing I really cared about was fucking ripped away from me. Honestly, mostly just me slapping people that remind me of me for doing exactly what I would do. Sensible me slapping actual me because actual me is a fucking dumbass emotional bitch with violent tendencies. One Piece: The fucking villains, obviously, Dr. Hililuck/Hiriluck for being a fucking bastard in the manga, holy shit was he an asshole! And also FUCKING SANJI. Jesus fuck, I am not over the pervy shit he does, what a creep.

Three favourite characters (in order of preference): LoZ: This is gonna be REAL hard because I love a lot of characters so... Midna, Link, and Darunia? It’s hard man. I love a lot of characters SO MUCH and it’s really hard to pick faves! DotNW: Richter, Emil, Aster. Emil and Aster share the same level of favoritism, but Richter is my number one. One Piece: Chopper, Zoro, Luffy. I used to like Luffy way more than I do now, but he’s still a fucking dork and I still like him tons.

A character you liked at first but don’t anymore: LoZ: I can’t really think of any, but I guess the character I waffle on a bit is Malon. Sometimes she’s like “Heck yeah! FAVE!” and sometimes I’m like “Eh, she exists...” IDK, I really like most of the characters. DotNW: I used to like Zelos a lot, but not anymore. Yeah this is kinda cheating since he ALSO didn’t debut in DotNW, but he’s in it so... TBF I like him in DotNW BETTER than in the first Symphonia, but not as much as I used to like him overall. One Piece: Fucking Sanji. I used to like him before the creepy factor set in. What really hit home for me was the Thriller Bark arc where he outright says he wanted the power of invisibility to creep on girls. Fucking nasty. The womanizing thing was just a quirk before that. I don’t think I’m ever gonna be over it. So gross and creepy now knowing he actively thought about creeping on girls using a special power. I know guys say this is a common thing and just how dudes are but no. That’s fucking sick. It’s one thing to say “yeah, I want to oggle women because tiddies are sexy” or whatever. It’s another thing to say “I WANT TO SPY ON WOMEN WITHOUT THEM KNOWING SO I CAN SEE TIDDY.” and it’s a third thing to say that IN A WORLD WHERE IT IS PHYSICALLY POSSIBLE TO BE INVISIBLE that you WOULD USE THAT POWER TO STARE AT WOMEN WITHOUT THEM KNOWING.

Three otps: LoZ: Link and basically everyone, but let’s narrow that. Link and Zelda is a classic, Link and Ruto is a guilty pleasure, Link and Peatrice is the underdog ship that I dig a lot. DotNW: Every combo of Richter, Emil, and Aster, enough said. One Piece: Luffy and food because he’s Ace, just let him fucking eat. Zoro and whoever he ends up liking. Tashigi maybe. Chopper and Milky.

Tagging: Anyone that wants to do it~

#ask meme #fandom meme #about me #kinda

[serenagaywaterford]

Have you seen Amanda Brugel's last instagram post? I'm beginning to worry Serena doesn't survive the season

HEY ANON! SERIOUS QUESTION: ARE YOU TRYING TO GIVE ME A HEART ATTACK LOL?! Now, cue me frantically pouring over the post!

I’m curious. What makes you think that it’s ominous? It could be my wishful thinking, but nothing screamed out at me from it? Am I blind, lol? I mean, of course, there’s Ever waxing all FOMO over it, but that’s expected cos she’s not in the show all that much as it is. And the photo, if I’m reading Amanda right, is from S1. Is that why?

Maybe it’s wishful thinking but I don’t think they’ll kill off Serena–yet. Mainly, she’s one of the central characters, and certainly the central (human) antagonist to June specifically. (We all know the real villain is Gilead and male power. Fred is a secondary antagonist imo, and more like a stand-in for Gilead itself to make it easier to see the true evil.) There is a great deal of focus on her thus far, to develop her and weave her into a story that, if we’re all being real, the Waterfords should have been gone from already and certainly by the end of S2 but we know there’s going to be even more about both of them. And there is quite QUITE a lot of potential to move Serena across the “villainy spectrum” towards neutral or even true anti-hero without it being a deus ex machina/jump the shark sort of thing. And that sort of story is pure gold for a writer. It can be milked for a long time and works easily with drama, and the feminist themes of the show. I don’t want to say “redemption arc” cos that would require A LOT of work and I think most viewers are still stuck on 210 (once again–that was a HORRIBLE MISSTEP FOR THE CREATIVE TEAM the way it was written. I’ll say that forever because so many, many people missed the underlying point about it), but movement is possible.

Also, Miller seems to really enjoy the character/actress, and Yvonne’s got a LOT of hype on social media/critics circles. I think even if you hate Serena, you recognise how stellar Yvonne’s doing. Like, that’s why Serena is so hated (other than people not understanding Serena)–Yvonne plays her so exceptionally well.

I have NO idea what the contract situation is like, but I’d suspect she has a 5-year deal, like most. Quite frankly, the only reason I can see for killing Serena off is that Yvonne wants out, to be with her new baby. It must be dreadful to have a newborn and be working 6 months on such a dark, cold show about the oppression of women and horrible things about children. But she is a professional so we’ll see.

Or, I suppose, if they want SHOCK VALUE. Cos, who really expects Serena to die? I know a lot of vocal idiots online cream themselves over her dying a painful death and wish her horrible death constantly, but those are just loud online idiots – and if I’ve learnt anything from decades of fandom, it’s that showrunners rarely give a shit about those fans or take them seriously. They’ll pander to a degree, but they deep down don’t care. (Obvs there are exceptions but most showrunners and writers have a goal and view and it doesn’t change based on the whims of rabid fans on Twitter and Tumblr. There was a time in my life that I believed they cared. They do not, lol.)

But hey, this is complete wishful thinking cos she’s my babe and I don’t want THT without her. So I live in denial that they’ll kill her off. She’s honestly the most complex and second most developed character in the entire series. It would seem short-sighted to dump a character like that.

Honestly? I think it’s far more likely that Rita will leave the show than Serena, if we’re looking at Amanda & Yvonne. Which is a shame too cos she’s the only Canadian in the main cast and a good character. It all depends I suppose on the direction they go with the Resistance/Mayday and the Waterfords. Rita and Serena could BOTH go by the end of the season.

I’m gonna rant now about the characters that SHOULD go…

In terms of characters that have run their course, I vote for the main males. Both Fred and Nick are totally redundant to me now–and this has nothing to do with my dislike of Nick, I swear. Just on a narrative level, he no longer serves much purpose if we’re supposed to be watching a show about women fighting back against a repressive patriarchal fascist regime. (I don’t need some cutsey romance subplot, thanks. And I don’t think June requires it either, not when she’s on a mission to get HANNAH back and make to Canada to reunite with her HUSBAND and bff, all whilst saving ALL the children and women of Gilead. She’s got quite enough going on. The story is supposed to be less depressing this season so the argument that the N/J thing brings “lightness” and “hope” to a bleak story is also outdated too.) He’s just redundant. Served his purpose, and it was an important purpose, don’t get me wrong! I understand his very integral role especially in S1 but it’s just run its course, imo. I think even Nick stans seem to recognise this on some level cos they’re always terrified he’s going to be killed off almost every episode lol.

I may not care for Luke either, but he actually will remain important to the story, I think and I can’t see any good reason to get rid of him. He needs to remain alive. I think it would kill June to find out he’s dead.

Fred is just… a cartoon now and needs to go. How many more Evil TM things can he do? Yawn. We don’t need the personification of Gilead anymore I don’t think. We get it. Both Nick and Fred have dodged certain death now and it’s just like, OKAY, with June I get it cos she’s the protag, but them? Give me a break. Lazy. The only reason I don’t think they’ll kill off Nick is pure fanservice. I can’t see any rational reason other than that. Those LOUD fangirls will have a fucking meltdown. (I’ll say that when I speak to non-fandom people offline about the show, the vast majority don’t really care about the N*ck/June storyline nearly as much. Most people I’ve spoken with care much more about the larger issues–and it was crazy cos I was talking to a friend that I hadn’t seen in like 4 months about THT, and I know isn’t a fan of THT–like she watches it but isn’t in fandom. Just casual. And I brought up Serena (of course I did) but I was very critical of her, and she (who knows ZERO about my true feelings for Serena lol) was defensive of the character. It blew my mind cos she’s really not the type to defend problematic characters or villains. (I honestly thought she’d be a Nick fan, N/J fan, and Serena hater. But she’s a JUNE fan first and foremost, doesn’t really care for N/J but thought it was cute at the time, and doesn’t hate Serena.) She even brought up points that we Serena fans say, completely unprompted by me. So, I think in terms of casual fans, they’re a little more perceptive than the vocal majority of N*ck/June fangirls that dominate fandom. God, it’s such a relief to talk to offline people sometimes. By and large, they seem far more reasonable when it comes to this show and where the focus should be. (I should probably mention that almost all of the people I’ve spoken to about THT have been over the age of 25 (many over 30), which probably has something to do with it tbh.)

Both Fred and Nick are props for the female characters, and I think June and Serena are developed enough at this point to stand on their own without the need for either of those dudes. I don’t need men to help tell a story about women, thanks.

But again, I’m just some online voice. The producers and showrunners don’t give a shit what I think. They don’t even know I exist. And that’s probably a good thing (considering my obsession with having June/Serena fuck, lol. I’m gonna wager they don’t wanna see that.).

I’m just gonna pretend I am not now freaking out about Serena being killed off in S3. As much as I think it may be a terrible idea, I honestly don’t put it past this show…

#i'm not shaking nope

[nickireadstfc]

The Foxhole Court, Chapter 1: Angsty With A Chance Of Extra™

In which we are introduced to Neil Josten, the angst-iest protag since OOTP!Harry Potter, and we meet his new friends: Coach Wymack, a Certified Hufflepuff, Andrew Minyard, a kitten who thinks of nothing but murder all day, and Kevin Day, a Big Deal. Everyone is blessed with a healthy dose of Extra and Dramatic™. Hernandez is also there, I guess.

Sounds good? Then it’s time for Nicki to read The Foxhole Court.

So a while ago I made this post demonstrating my absolute confusion over what the fuck The Foxhole Court is (What is the court everyone’s talking about? Why so much orange? What is that weird ass sport? What is the court???). Since then, I’ve had countless anons trying to explain the plot to me and/or urging me to read the damn books.

So here I am. Reading the damn books.

Disclaimer: This is, first and foremost, 100% inspired by/based on Mark Reads ‘Harry Potter’ which I truly believe is one of the most hilarious and well-written things you can find on the Internet. Mark, I owe you everything.

Let’s fucking go.

           Neil Josten let his cigarette burn to the filter without taking a drag. He didn’t want the nicotine; he wanted the acrid smoke that reminded him of his mother.

What the hell. Two sentences in and I can already tell that Neil is extra. Like, seriously Super Extra™. I get that it’s meant tragically and refers to past trauma and all, but oh my god. This is some Augustus Waters type shit.

For the record: I love it.

(Please do not ever take anything I say at face value. I’m a sarcastic piece of shit and I can already tell I’m going to love this series. Please.)

So apparently, Neil’s dad is in prison and his mom is dead. He is also an actual homeless dude who sleeps either in an abandoned real estate or just in his school’s locker room. What the fuck, that is the saddest shit I’ve read all day. No wonder is angst levels are through the ceiling. Someone care for this kid.

           His neighbors rarely left the comfort of their couches and daily soaps, but every time he came and went he risked getting spotted. If people realized he was squatting they’d start asking difficult questions.

Okay so this is my bilingual brain talking, I know squatting means something else here, but I just imagined Neil idly doing his squats in his appropriated backyard.

No shit, dude. I’d start asking questions too.

This is the point where we finally get some info on what the fuck Exy is.

           Exy was a bastard sport, an evolved sort of lacrosse on a soccer-sized court with the violence of ice hockey, and Neil loved every part of it from its speed to its aggression.

MURDER LACROSSE! Yay!

Why is it called Exy though, is what I’m wondering. Because that is a dumb ass name. Endanger and eXplore Yourself? Extremist Youngsters? Extremely Yellow?

The last one is a joke. We all know that they’re fucking orange.

What I’m also wondering is how the hell that sport came to be. It evolved from lacrosse, sure, but like… How? Someone just thought “Hey, I want my lacrosse to be a lot more MURDEROUS so I’m gonna play it on a BIG ASS FIELD with VIOLENT ASS PLAYERS”?

Then again, someone also thought to just play golf but with tiny weak balls and clubs, and today we have mini golf. So there’s that.

Now it’s time for the entrance of someone who’s shaping up to be my first favourite character: Coach Wymack.

           “Bullshit,” Neil said. “No one recruits from Millport. No one knows where it is.”

           “There’s this thing called a map,” the stranger said. “You might have heard of it.”

That’s his first line. That’s his first line. I love this guy.

I continue loving this guy because he offers Neil a way out of his shitty living situation: Hey, come play with my team of rejects, homeless dudes, juvies and addicts! We might be so shitty we’re gonna get kicked out of the Almighty Exy League if we don’t deliver, and our players have regular actual suicide attempts, but at least we’re getting a lot of media coverage! Oh, you’re on the run from your murderous dad and trying to lay low? My bad.

What a dude.

Next up, another character introduces himself in a wonderfully defining way: Andrew Minyard, who likes Neil’s hot bod so much he decides to smack a racquet into it.

          “God damn it, Minyard. This is why we can’t have nice things.”

I agree. Chill out, my man, no need for violence.

(I have a slight feeling “No need for violence” is not exactly the Foxes’ team slogan.)

Surprisingly, Neil turns out to be a massive stalker fanboy as he exactly knows who Andrew is and has been collecting newspaper clippings on him for, like, years. No biggie. I can already smell the shippers lurking in the distance.

Spoiler alert: I also know that those two will end up Banging™ at some point because tumblr told me. It’s seriously the only thing tumblr told me was for sure happening.

What can I say. We love our gays here on this hellsite.

However, Neil’s ability to easily follow all the drama that was going on in Exy World also adds to the questionable existence of Exy. A sport has to be around for some time to get that kind of news coverage.

Example: My best friends do competitive cheerleading, which has been around for years and years, but it’s still a minority sport here in Germany. They have massive tournaments and fierce competition between teams, yet no one gives a shit. Only like, two teams even get any news coverage, and certainly not enough to make this level of stalking possible.

I’m calling bullshit artistic freedom.

(I don’t actually mind too much because I live for the drama. Also, Palmetto State Uni is fictional as well, so who gives a shit.)

It’s time for another wonderful character introduction: Meet Kevin Day.

We don’t know much about Kevin yet except for the fact that he’s a Big Deal in Exy World and Neil sorta hates him. They go way back, apparently.

           Kevin was sitting on top of the entertainment center along the back wall. He’d pushed the TV off to one side to give himself more room and covered the space around him with papers.

Again, this may be me bilingual brain talking, but. How am I supposed to understand this?

Papers, as in newspaper that he’s been reading? Like “Oh god, you guys were taking so long being Emo and Persuasive out there with your contracts I just had to read something to save myself from actual brain death”? Or papers, as in actual sheets of paper that he just spread around himself for dramatic effect??

Either way, it’s Extra and Dramatic and I love it.

           He and his adopted brother Riko Moriyama wrote the numbers one and two on their faces with markers, tracing them over and over every time they started to fade. Neil didn’t understand it then, but Kevin and Riko were aiming for the stars. They were going to be famous, they promised him.

Literally what level of E X T R A.

I cannot stop laughing at this.

What a nerd.

Also: Riko! I’ve heard that name before. I think he and Neil don’t exactly wear friendship bracelets. I think.

Does he wear friendship bracelets with Kevin?

Intrigued for more. #findrikosfriendshipbracelet2k17

Kevin is also probably kind of an idiot. Like, you watched a man get murdered with this guy and yet you don’t recognize him with a little bit of hair dye on? Either Neil is Hannah Montana or you’re just a massive dumbo.

(Or he’s just pretending not to know him for Plot Related Reasons, which is the most likey answer. But let’s go with Hannah Montana for now.)

           “Your opinion has been noted and duly dismissed” Wymack said.

Fury, anyone?

           “You need one of us to talk to your parents? (…) Are they the ones who hurt you?”

Have I mentioned I love Wymack.

           “You know the people I look for. (…) Foxes are Foxes for a reason and they know we wouldn’t sign you if you didn’t qualify. That doesn’t mean they know specifics. It’s not my place to ask, and I’m sure as hell not going to tell them.”

Okay but have I mentioned I love Wymack.

           Coach Wymack was quiet for a minute. “Did you think I made the team the way it is because I thought it would be a good publicity stunt? It’s about second chances, Neil. Second, third, fourth, whatever, as long as ou get at least one more than what anyone else wanted to give you.”

Okay but HAVE I MENTIONED I LOVE WYMACK.

Holy fucking shit. I cannot get over this guy.

This is the most Hufflepuff thing I’ve read in probably forever. Like, he deserves a badge. A Certified Hufflepuff badge. Which is, in my opinion, the highest honours you can give someone. What the hell.

Obvs, Neil signs with the Foxes after that shining, glittering star of a motivation speech.

Next up: University! Murder lacrosse! Childhood trauma! Fun gay times!

(Side note: I feel like that’s a good description of the series as a whole.)

I seriously cannot wait.

#the foxhole court #tfc #the raven king #the kings men #nora sakavic #nicki reads tfc #findrikosfriendshipbracelet2k17

[spectrumscribe]

I live commented on the latest (and very leaked) episode of TMNT and this was the result.

Spoilers below, obviously speaking. Avoid if you don’t want to see this shit before you see the actual episode of Owari.

Not much of a break down or analysis of the episode, just me being salty about a lot of things.

----------------------------

Finally he’s fucking dead

Why did they bury him don’t they cremate folks in japan

Oh fuck no he’s still alive

Wait no he’s a ghost, fucking great.

Oh real helpful advice splinter thank you

No he’s not the fucking sensei he’s their idiot older brother don’t tell him he has more power than he does

Oh oh he’s leaving

Fucking bye splinter, real useful advice as always.

Now the hospital scene. God. Karai I’m sorry your life sucks you didn’t deserve this.

Oh hey they mentioned Casey has an actual family. Whoa. It’s only been like two three seasons since they did.

Ew hand holding

Ew touchy hand holding

Nice a montage scene

Casey you disaster I love you, I can’t believe he did that to shredder’s mask. Oh wait yes I can he’s Casey.

Okay everyone looks like they’ve been listening to too much MCR and I can’t tell if I hate it or love it.

At least April is untouched.

Kay I have to admit, the sneaky black look when they’re in the actual dark is p cool.

Also April killin it as always. Thank you for that nick.

Y’all have been at this for like three years stop tempting fate and saying the Thing every time you get a break.

Real strategic guys, go straight for the cliff. Nice.

Aw shit its Xever. Finally someone who knows what they’re doing at least most of the time.

Apparently Raph leveled up since the last time he fought Xever. Nice.

Whoa cold, leaving him to suffocate. I like.

I can’t believe it only took a whole four seasons to get the kids on board with the murder plan.

Yo what the retromutagen is back?? Where the shit has it been all this time.

Omg the reason stockman has been a fly all this time is because he liked it. He actually liked it. Wonders never cease.

“Michael” omfg

“Michael” I can’t get over that. That’s almost as strange as Mikey saying “papa” out of nowhere.

At least bebop and rocksteady don’t forget Casey and April like the plot often does. Thanks guys.

Oh hell yes some Donnie ninja action for the first time in forever. Donnie hurry Casey is about to die and you’re not the one to do it.

Wow I can’t believe they finally remembered the shit Donnie can do when used correctly. Beautiful.

OH SHIT ROBOT ARM NICE

“-all of your hands,” nice

Ooh clockwork hands are nifty. Loving the steampunk.

Okay so April can take a full on punch from tigerclaw but not one slash from shredder on the arm, like what??? Continuity, people, please.

And Leo continues to have bad catch phrases in battle. Bring this back more often thanks.

OH SHIT MORE TIGERS

YES

Bruh wait has tigerclaw been chillin with a bunch of actual tigers

This seems like furry shit

I’m calling it he’s a cat fucker

MOLOTOV COCKTAIL THE NINJA EDITION YEEEAAAAH

Oh and we conveniently leave the humans behind. nice.

Showdown. Fuck yeah.

A family that murders together stays together. Kill a bitch, boys.

Actually working together in battle, nice nice. Everyone’s getting their shots in, I’m loving it.

OH FUCK IS IT GONNA BE DEE?

no of course not, who am i kidding why would they let him do anything cool in this hell show.

Retromutagen time. Oh no it doesn’t fucking work, of course it didn’t work.

DEE NO

Oh nvm his boyfriend and girlfriend saved him.

But shit he can’t get back up. Convenient.

YES MIKEY GO BEAT HIS ASS

NO DON’T

FUCK- well there he goes too. Bye Mikey, RIP.

The first they show of how scary he is in seasons and he’s thrown off a building. Ugh.

And there goes Raph too. At least he smashed shredder’s head against shit before then.

Oh shut up Leo shredhead obvs gives no shits anymore. Don’t try guilting him now.

HA HIS ARM

FUCKING

WOW JUST LIKE KARAI NOW YOU CAN BE TWINSIES

Rat dad no this is not the time for a vision

“Fear nothing” um excuse me that’s not helpful here

Wtf why was Leo’s sword able to defeat shredder but not fucking Karai’s, who had a direct shot at his stupid radioactive heart

I call bullshit

BULLSHIT

also

OH FUCK ITS HIS HEAD

Wait no it’s not a head. I thought it was a head.

The end- oh wait no more hetero

“-what no one else could,” like you?? Why is she just letting this go? Karai don’t let it go. You wanted the bastard dead and you didn’t get to do it yourself why are you not mad.

What happened to Leo’s broken arm. Did he healing hand it when no one was looking and not share that with Karai. Wtf.

Well that was a horrendously out of character moment from Raph. Thanks nick.

Everyone emerges from the shadows to cockblock Leo, bless.

Why are you all out in the middle of daylight holy fuck

Guys get underground it’s like noon or something

“Right, sensei?” guys Leo’s talking to thin air you should do something about that

And we pan out with a watermark in the sky of splinter. Real classy.

Okay but

WHERE IS SHINI

HELL WHERE IS EVERYBODY

Guys you had like, an armada of friends who are basically tanks why didn’t you use them to defeat shredder.

Wtf

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Okay so all in all- yikes.

Ignoring some continuity errors, it just felt… kind of really rushed? Also a bit forced in specific areas.

The whole “Leo defeats the big bad” thing is really bothering me. This was a family fight. The whole family. That should have been the brothers all together, their friends who are basically their extended family now, and Karai maybe?? Since she’s actually related to and very deeply involved in this mess??

But nope. Lone Wolf Leo strikes again. As per fucking usual. I don’t know how they’re expecting Leo to lead the team, honestly. His skills on teamwork need some serious polishing. (The whole “you are their father and master now” thing with splinter last ep is still seriously bothering me. Like…. Eugh.)

Definitely not a fan of how things worked out. We barely saw the other brothers do much of anything, Karai was flipping bed ridden- I swear she wasn’t that injured in the last episode, I’m calling bull- and Casey and April were utterly exiled from the final showdown.

Nvm that the Mutanimals- who lost their only safe refuge and literal home in all this- weren’t even mentioned. Also Shini. Where did that beautiful murder lady get off to? She was fine in the last ep, why didn’t she show up and shank shredder for her wonderful senpai?

And the retromutagen. Seriously, that’s been completely ignored for over a season, and it suddenly shows up again. There’s been a number of innocent mutants come and gone who could have used that stuff. Feels weird that the boys never even offered them the chance at humanity again. (Karai too, have they even told her it exists?? Though I doubt she’d take that offer, it’d still be nice if they at least told her she has the choice.)

((What is it with this show and taking choices away from characters? More specifically the female ones.))

At least we got an explanation why stockman was still a fly. Wow is he a weirdo. Gotta love him for it though.

So yeah, lots of dropped points here. Important points. Would have been nice to actually mention a few of them, even just in passing.

Over all I didn’t feel much emotion or gravity from the episode. Mostly just salt. I’ll bet people will be crying all over the place about what happened in this thing and I’ll just be sitting here feeling nothing but sodium powered emotion.

I’m still kind of really laughing over the whole MCR look though. I can’t wait to see all the angsty AMV’s that come from this, it’ll be fucking hilarious.

#writer's notes #my writing #SALT #oh god so much salt #Owari #TMNT 2012 #meta #a play by play of the episode #because i couldn't stand to be alone in my reactions #thus i'm sharing it with everyone here #thanks guys #y'all are troopers #tmnt spoilers #tmnt season 4

[silvrhxnd]

looong stream of thoughts on that latest julian interview (this isnt sw-related, sorry sw mutuals)

im just gonna copy/paste the tweets i made, then i’ll keep going normally

imo ed sheeran sucks but also like this is why julian doesnt say anything in interviews like ppl love to hang onto one thing he says abt how a lot of popular music is nothing that innovative (which is largely true) and everyone thinks julian is taking some kinda high ground

like his thing has always been that he wants to make weirder stuff that ppl havent heard before, more popular, to push the boundaries more i guess? No ones saying ur not allowed to enjoy pop music just cuz it’s not that musically innovative

i cant like read his mind but it’s always seemed like what bugs him is that stuff that sounds formulated to be as marketable as possible is what becomes most recognized as good music, when artists who are doing new, v different sounding things arent at all

Which, i mean, is understandable cuz that stuff is new so it isnt easy for the masses to enjoy it immediately. &tons of ppl enjoying smth doesnt make it BAD. But to me, it’s sad artists making things that rly push the envelope arent also considered good enough to become popular

like ofc u can love pop music (i like it myself). it’s just that w pop it’s like well of course it’s successful; it meets the criteria of what’s long been established in everyone’s mind as “good” music. From what he’s been saying for years, it seems julian is bothered by the fact

that the music business machine (specifically the industry of popular/“mainstream” music) is so focused on making money by churning out profitable hits, it doesn’t leave much room (if at all) for expanding what that “good” music criteria can be

I don’t mean to put words in julian’s mouth, but it seems like ppl hear his words and take them as an attack on a specific artist or on people’s personal taste, when it’s actually a dislike of the industry focusing on profit over quality and innovation of music

and anyway i rly dont think that julian "or maybe im just full of it/don't listen to anything i say/*says 'or not' after everything he says" casablancas is like trying to dictate to the world what should and shouldn't be liked/popular

not to write an essay but...im not saying i agree w everything julian says,obvs, but it rly seems like he can be as careful and tip-toey w his words as possible 2where his responses are 4 paragraphs long, & journalists will still find some controversial statement in it to blow up

(end tweets)

and tbh like all this nonsense goes all the way back to when the strokes first rly blew up and every magazine was like LISTEN TO THIS BAND THEY WILL CHANGE THEIR LIFE THEY’RE TAKING THE WORLD BY STORM WOW RISING STARS and even back then julian (and the other guys too!) was like can u guys chill out cuz people should like listen to the music and decide if they like it?

but ofc nobody listened cuz hype=$$ for music “journalists” 

and i mean i think their music definitely deserves the success that it got; i think it’s rly awesome music! but the kinda bummer-side of all that laud is that now there are so many expectations placed on the strokes--not as a group of 5 friends in a band that makes great music, but as The Strokes™ aka the commercially successful, influential NY indie rock band that defined music for a generation and blah blah blah. and again i think they deserve recognition as artists, but the problem is that NOW so many people (fans, journalists, whoever) see them as The Strokes™ as if its a brand with a whole brand identity attached to it (that the guys themselves did NOT set out to create) that includes commercial success and making music that is Good by default just cuz it’s got the name “The Strokes” attached to it. and while having success attached to a group you’re a part of is definitely not bad in itself...i can understand why as an artist, julian would wanna step away from all of that for a while. 

there’s nothing remotely near that level of expectation with the voidz. idk i guess creatively, it seems like it’d definitely allow for a creative energy that’s different than what the strokes have. like obvs he loves the strokes guys and theyve been friends for forever! but it doesnt all have to be about the strokes.

ALL THAT BEING SAID..........

i do not agree with 100% of everything julian says. ariel pink is a misogynist and doesnt deserve popularity. bill maher isnt funny. and julian should rly pay attention to commentators/intellectuals/philosophers of color. 

ok rant over i guess lol

this is kinda dumb and i may delete it later like who cares what i think abt an interview??????? 

#delete later #maybe