#LISTEN TO A BRITISH PERSON PRONOUNCE THIS WORD

[arminsumi]

I want to kiss you / キスしたい

G. Satoru

NOTE: i recently started learning to write in japanese for not much reason other than to occupy my mind with something new. this little daydream came to me and i can't stop thinking about it, i think falling in love despite a language barrier is one of the purest and sweetest ways to fall in love.

WARNINGS — it might be fem reader idk, kissing 👍, ur married w him at the end, not proofread lol i'm snuggled up in bed ok

Satoru cant speak english and you cant speak japanese; Suguru is the translator friend. You met him online years ago, who knows how. But you hit it off, and four years of friendship rolled by.

Satoru heard all about Y/n and saw you many times when Suguru facetimed or called you. You and him had many cute, playful interactions, ranging from making hearthands at each other to flipping each other off and laughing about it. Sometimes Satoru would be sat off-camera, overloading Suguru with things to translate, because he had a lot to say to you. One time, Suguru left for a few minutes to get a pizza delivery, and then Satoru got very quiet and the two of you blinked at your screens.

"Hi."

"Hi."

And then you two for some reason started laughing with your whole chests, Suguru walked in with a confused smirk. He joked, "Sooo... what did you and Satoru talk about while I was gone?" He asked, gentle accent coming through in soft waves. "The mysteries of the universe." You replied. Satoru was already diving into the pizza box, but he still listened to you speak; he wondered what you had said, maybe you used some fancy words to say that you liked him? He'd be lying if he said he didn't memorize variations of "i like you" after that. He was paranoid that he could miss you saying that you liked him.

You managed a slow, meticulously-pronounced nice to meet you in Japanese when you finally visited Tokyo. It was at the airport. You and Suguru had shared many hugs — good grief, you'd seen height comparisons many times but none painted a real idea of just how big these boys were. But Satoru? He was loudmouthed on a screen and surprisingly shy in person. Eventually he hugged you and didn't let go. He even got so comfy as to hang and cling to your body like you saw him doing with Suguru in countless photos and videos.

Though you could barely pronounce the little Japanese that you picked up, Satoru felt giddy to hear your pretty voice in his language. He listened to you like you were reciting love poetry to him, fists under his chin and eyes starry. But you were just saying basic phrases, boring things — nothing that articulated your thoughts properly.

He was far too embarrassed to try and speak any English when he first met you, even though after developing a crush on you he did start learning some English on the side. He knew quite a bit, but listening was so impossibly difficult it frustrated him like nothing else. He was also self-conscious of his English accent, though Suguru tried to assure him that he sounded very cute and almost oddly British.

So often instead of attempting to speak tiny phrases to you, Satoru threw a lot of hand motions and signals your way which got the two of you and Suguru laughing — poor Sugie, he was always translating even the smallest things you said even if you muttered them under your breath, because Satoru was eager to know every little thought and expression you had, even if you were simply commenting on the weather.

Once you commented that it was so hot, you were visiting during a heatwave-filled summer. Satoru raised his brows at Suguru expectantly, and you heard a familiar translation;

暑い。

It's hot.

There was such a frustrating language barrier between the two of you, it became more evident when you had finally flown over the sea to meet them.

Yet you and satoru fell in love silently and beautifully, your love flowing like a river in the most unexpected directions. You felt his affection emanating from his irises. You and him joked around, and talked — though you had no idea what the other meant most of the time. Sometimes the two of you gave up and you talked in English, he responded with Japanese, and it went on like that very comedically until Suguru came back to bridge the gap.

Lots of time was spent putting your heads together over your phone, reading translations of what you wanted to say to each other.

One day, when Suguru left the two of you alone in his apartment kitchen so that he could hop to the convenience store, Satoru typed something into the translator and let you read it. Your face warmed up.

キスしたい。

I want to kiss you.

He looks at you expectantly.

You type back to him.

Then kiss me.

それからキスして。

He blushed and hesistated, the two of you making electric eye contact for a while before he boyishly pecked your lips to test if you liked his kiss, but oh that's all the two of you needed to realize just how much you liked each other. You melted into each other like your bodies were made for nothing else but to embrace and be one. He shook a little, tentatively gliding his lips over yours. His hands nervously cupped your cheeks. With the way he handled you so carefully, you'd think you were made of porcelain.

Your reciprocation meant everything to him. His confidence flourished. The soft smacking, wet sounds got louder when he kissed you more passionately. Those gentle hands found their way to the back of your neck, and he softly pressed you closer to him as if he was scared you would pull away. What if you changed your mind mid-kiss? He was overthinking and you wouldn't have even guessed it, because you thought he was in the same blissed out dream state as you were. So high on kissing that the world fell away.

The two of you started smiling embarrassedly, grinning so hard that you couldn't continue kissing. Then the two of you just giggled against each other's faces — a subconscious realization swept him; laughter and kissing are their own languages.

Yes as years passed and you visited time and time again, your Japanese improved and his English improved. When you moved to Japan, eventually you adopted a messy mix of Japanese and English with Satoru. He liked showing off how perfectly he could pronounce things, and you liked showing off that you could write very neat kana.

Years and years and years passed and when you and him were married in your own little apartment, starting a life together, a very fluent Satoru reminisced about how the two of you fell in love despite barely speaking to each other.

"It was your eyes for me." You said.

"Oh really? It was your voice for me. I didn't know what you were saying, but it sounded nice." He said.

"Mmm I liked your voice, too." You said, snuggling your head on his shoulder. He basked in the attention, though it was common, it always felt special for him. The smallest hand touches and wrist kisses made his heart lurch.

"Remember when I always nagged Suguru to translate every little thing you said?"

"Yeah, you worked him to the bone." You chuckled.

"I just wanted to know what you were saying. I had such a crush on you, looking back now it was even ridiculous how much I liked you considering the barrier and all."

"Ooh, did you?"

"How is this surprising? We're married??"

"Oh yeah."

#🗑️ — trash #♥️ 𝐆𝐎𝐉𝐎 𝐒𝐀𝐓𝐎𝐑𝐔 — 五条悟 #gojo #gojo satoru #fluff #gojo fluff #gojo x reader #gojo satoru x reader #gojo x fem reader #satoru x reader #gojou satoru x reader #jjk gojo #satoru gojo

[ghostofthemost141]

Welcome Home Simon

Pairing: Ghost x Soap, Third Person POV

Word Count: 2,601

Themes: !18+! for Suggestive Themes but nothing Explicit, Fluff

About: Johnny welcomes home his significant other after a long and grueling mission.

Notes: I am starting to get into this pairing a lot, they just have so much chemistry with each other and I was heavily inspired by the lovely @wispscribbles and their art 'Welcome Home Simon' to write this so thank you for giving me permission to write this!! I enjoyed doing this. For some reason, this music fits with the theme of this fic so of course I was listening to it the whole time I was writing it. And this is also a situation where Simon is in the military and Johnny isn't. Enjoy!!

The soft distant boom of thunder that occurred every few seconds was enough to keep him awake. Even though it was nearing two o’clock in the morning, he knew it was worth it to see the one he loves the most. Johnny ‘Soap’ MacTavish never thought this would be his life. A year ago, he was working in a dead end customer service job. He wanted something more in life. It was miserable getting up just to go to a job you hated so much. His life was essentially on repeat back then. Get up, go to work from nine am to five pm, come home, eat some cheap dinner, watch some stupid soap opera show he secretly enjoys, take a shower, go to bed, and then rinse and repeat. Johnny knew there had to be something more to his life, he just wasn’t sure where to look. One day, after work, he decided to try this local new coffee shop that opened up. As he entered, there was a little line but he had all the time in the world to wait. He was not in any rush. 

“I'll just have regular tea, please.” 

Tea? Who the fuck orders tea at a coffee shop? Johnny thought. It was the man in front of the line. The first thing he noticed about the man was how tall and broad he was. Johnny was pretty fit himself but this man was huge. The man wore a dark navy jacket with gray jeans and regular tennis shoes. The second thing he noticed about the man was his thick British accent. Johnny himself was Scottish and everyone always giggles when he starts to talk, simply because of the way he pronounces and says some words, and while it doesn’t bother him for the most part, he can’t help how he sounds and where he is from. The man paid for his tea and stepped to the side to wait for it. Johnny was one more person away from ordering a coffee. But for some reason, he couldn’t take his eyes off of the man who ordered tea at a coffee shop. Johnny was surprised to find the man wearing a skull mask that concealed his face apart from his eyes. His deep brown eyes scanned the entire shop, eventually landing on Johnny who immediately looked away, feeling a little flustered he was caught staring. The man was given the tea he had ordered and he turned and walked out of the coffee shop. 

Wait..is that his wallet on the ground? 

Johnny stepped out of line and approached the lone, leather wallet that was on the ground. He opened it up to find an ID card and a military ID card both issued to Simon Riley. So that’s his name. In the regular ID, Simon Riley had short, poofy blonde hair, the same deep brown eyes, and light skin. It has to be his, just from the eye color alone. Maybe he could catch him, he couldn’t have gotten far. Ditching the coffee all together, Johnny closed the wallet and sprinted out of the coffee shop, his eyes scanning outside to find the masked man walking down the street. 

“Sir? Sir?!” Johnny called out to the man, hurrying up his pace. 

The masked man turned and faced him, relieved that it was indeed the same man who was in the coffee shop just moments ago. 

“You..” Johnny paused, catching his breath from sprinting, “you dropped your wallet in the shop.” 

The man took the wallet from Johnny, examining it to confirm if it was his or not. 

“Thank you.” The man thanked Johnny and was starting to turn and leave when Johnny remembered the military ID card. 

“Are you in the ‘milatree’?” Johnny asked. 

Simon was amused by Johnny's accent. 

“Yes.” Simon plainly answered. 

“Oh that's nice. My cousin is in the military too. I didn't mean to snoop but I had to check and see if it was ‘our wallet before I chased you down.” Johnny explained himself. 

Simon understood and appreciated Johnny's act of kindness. Most people are turned away by him due to his appearance but this Scottish man was the first to not be. In fact he wanted to have a conversation with him. 

“I appreciate you returning my wallet.” Simon thanked him. 

And from then on it was history. Johnny and Simon kept bumping into each other in town to the point that eventually Johnny asked to hang out with him. Although Simon was reluctant at first, he agreed. From then on, both Johnny and Simon grew close. Real close. Johnny was the first to get feelings and he pushed them away. He didn’t even really have a real reason to have romantic feelings for Simon. He has always had girlfriends. Granted they were never anything serious or lasted long, but for some reason, Simon was special. He has never felt this way about any man or anyone in general. His heart would race every time he would think he saw him, his leg would start bouncing if Simon sat too close to him, he would chew the inside of his cheek if Simon prolonged eye contact for too long, and his palms would get sweaty if Simon brushed his hand on his leg. When they were out with friends, Simon always insisted on sitting next to Johnny. Johnny didn’t understand why he was having these feelings for Simon. He figured this phase would past eventually and maybe just maybe he just had an infatuation for him and looked up to him. It wasn’t until one night when Simon brushed his hand on Johnny, a little too down low, and Simon immediately felt it in his pants. He tried to hide it, but he knew Simon saw it. He had to have. That confirmed it for Simon. He was in love with Simon. He didn’t understand why but he did. He loved Simon. 

And then Simon told Johnny he would have to be deployed again for another mission. 

Present Johnny was glad he did it, but Past Johnny didn’t understand why he did it. Simon invited him over to his place to hang out before Simon would have to leave early in the morning. He had it in his mind to confess to Simon how he felt, in fear he would get killed in combat before he ever got the chance to do so. So he did. He told Simon how he felt. 

“I don’t know why, I feel this way about ‘ou. But I love you, Simon.” 

For a moment, Simon was silent. His deep brown eyes pierced into Johnny’s bright blue ones. It was then that Johnny started to regret what he did. 

You stupid focking idiot. Why would you do that? 

The thoughts stopped when Simon lifted up his mask, just enough for his lips to be out,leaned in and placed a passionate kiss onto Johnny’s lips. Johnny immediately latched back, feeling romance and lust take over immediately but he managed to hold himself together to avoid hurting or making Simon uncomfortable. He didn’t expect that night to go as far as it did, but it very much did to the point were Simon was worried he would get a noise complaint. But it was the best night of their lives. They both thought that. 

“So dis whole fucking time, you were teasin’ meh?” Johnny asked the scruffy blonde man. 

“Maybe I was, maybe I wasn’t.” Simon teased back as Johnny rested his head on Simon’s soft but muscular chest, feeling loved for the first time ever in his life. 

The next day was hard for both of them. They didn’t care that everyone was watching as Johnny gave Simon a ‘Good luck’ peck on the cheek. Even though Simon couldn’t give a peck back due to all of the gear on him, he instead bumped his forehead onto Johnny’s. Simon didn’t care what the rest of the team thought, whether they were supportive or not. Turns out they were supportive, but he wouldn’t stop being relentlessly teased the whole time. The first time Simon came back home from a mission, Johnny had a warm and hearty dinner ready for Simon. Of course, Simon was surprised, but very much appreciated it. And that’s what Johnny did every single time Simon came home from a mission. During the day he would work at his carpentry job that Simon got for him and then come home and make sure the place was tidy and would be ready for Simon to come home. He missed him when he was out on missions, but it only made their relationship stronger. 

And that is exactly what Johnny was doing right at this moment. Simon already warned Johnny ahead of time that he would be flying in really late due to their original flight being canceled. Of course, Johnny insisted and still prepared a meal for him, despite making it hard for him to stay awake. Just as he was drifting off on the couch, the door swung open. 

“Si?” Soap tiredly called to him. 

“I’m ‘ere, Johnny.” Simon responded as he approached the couch. 

Johnny smiled at Simon as he pulled his mask up to his forehead, his handsome face being put on display for Johnny. 

“How was your flight?” Johnny asked as Simon approached him. 

“Bloody fucking lovely.” 

Johnny chuckled at his sarcasm. 

“Take all that gear off, love.” Johnny suggested as he went to grab Simon’s tactical vest. 

“At least take me out to dinner first.” 

Johnny broke out into a chuckle, leaning his head onto Simon’s chest. Simon was significantly taller than Johnny so he was always at perfect eye height at his chest, which is Johnny’s favorite pillow. 

“I promised I did cook some grub.” Johnny said, not moving his head. 

Simon ran his fingers through Johnny’s mohawk. He could tell Johnny missed him a lot. 

“How was your mission?” Johnny asked as Simon led Johnny to the couch. 

Simon laid down on his back and Johnny laid down on his chest, wrapping his arms around him. 

“The worst we had in a long time.” Simon said. 

“I’m ‘orry, Simon.” Johnny apologized. 

“Ain’t your fault, Johnny. I’m just happy to be home.” 

Simon had felt instant relief when he entered their home they both had bought recently. They bought it a couple of months ago and it was perfect for the two of them. When Simon first got with Johnny, he had walls up. While he too had feelings for Johnny, he was afraid of letting him in. He wasn’t afraid to show his face almost right away to Johnny. In fact, remembering that moment always puts a smile on his face. It wasn’t like a ‘grand reveal moment’ he just took it off in front of Johnny one day and Johnny wouldn’t stop staring at him. 

“What? Do I have some shit on my face?” 

“No, not at all. You’re just..” 

Johnny could barely put the words together to describe how he felt. But one things for sure, he had hit the jackpot. 

“Just what?” Simon asked, afraid of what Johnny would say. 

Johnny just approached Simon and smashed his lips onto his. After a moment of lust, Johnny finally managed to find the words to say. 

“You’re just stunning, Simon.” 

Simon chuckled to himself, remembering the moment. 

“What’s so funny, aye?” Johnny asked. 

“Nothing. Just remembering the time you first saw my entire face.” 

Johnny’s face turned pink once Simon said that. 

“I assume for a good reason righ’?” 

“Yes of course.” Simon reassured Johnny. 

Johnny just held Simon tightly, fear of him disappearing. 

“I thought about ‘ou every single day.” Johnny commented. 

“So did I.” 

Johnny smiled to himself, knowing that Simon loves him as much as he loves him. Things were kind of awkward when they first got together only cause neither of them had ever been with a man before and they were still getting to know each other. But now they know for sure that they love each other very much. 

“Dinner is in the fridge.” Johnny softly told Simon. 

“Is it alright if I go get it?” 

“Of course, love.” 

Johnny moved first so Simon could get up. As Simon was in the kitchen, Johnny got into his own thoughts. Everyday he wakes up not believing that this was his life. Some days it feels like a dream. He couldn’t believe he had gotten so lucky. So damn lucky. Johnny was always afraid that his Captain would be at his front door instead of Simon, but he is thankful every single time Simon is the one who shows up. But there’s always that chance that the next mission he goes to could be the last time he sees him. Even though they always spend as much time as they can together before he gets sent off again, Johnny feels as though there’s always that off chance that something could happen to Simon. Anything could happen. Johnny knows that Simon is the one he wants to be with for the rest of his life. He still gets flirted on and hit on by many women and even though it makes his ego bigger, he always turns them down, happy to inform them that he is happily taken. He just wants to actually have physical proof of it. The kind that rests on your finger. 

“Fuck it.” Johnny mumbled to himself. 

Johnny got up from the couch and marched over to Simon. Before Simon could even get a word out, Johnny grabbed him by his vest and pulled him into a kiss. Simon immediately melted into the kiss, his food leaving his mind that very second. One hand went into Johnny’s mohawk and the other on his hip. Both of Johnny’s hands stayed on Simon’s chest as he pulled him even closer, deepening the kiss. Something was growing intensely inside both of them and they both knew it well. Simon was the first to pull away to get some air. 

“Someone missed me.” Simon smirked at Johnny. 

“I can say the same about ‘ou.” 

Simon laughed, giving Johnny a light peck. 

“Let’s get married.” 

Simon’s eyes went wide when Johnny said that. 

“Really? You wanna get married to me?” Simon asked Johnny. 

“Fucking ‘ell, yes I do. There’s always that chance that you may not come back home alive. I want to do everything with ya Simon. I love you.” Johnny poured his heart out to him.

Simon felt his heart racing. He has never had someone pour their heart out to him like that, let alone demand to get married. He never thought his life would end up like this. Never. But he was happy, very happy. 

“Johnny..” Simon started.

Johnny perked up, waiting to hear what Simon had to say. 

“It’s going to be bloody fucking hard deciding whose last name gets changed.” 

Johnny knew that was Simon’s way of saying yes. Johnny hugged Simon tightly, just so damn happy. 

“Quit stabbing me, Johnny.” Simon remarked. 

Johnny’s face turned beet red, forgetting about their ‘predicaments.’ 

“Let’s go take care of that.” Simon seductively said. 

“But Simon, you need to eat.” 

“Eh, I ain’t that hungry.” 

Johnny placed a kiss on Simon’s lips, just high off of his love alone. The food got cold in the microwave, the storm raged outside, the sun was starting to peek through the windows, but neither of them cared. They only cared about each other and that is all that matters to them.  

END

#simon ghost riley #cod #callofduty #call of duty #cod modern warfare #ghost x soap #simon riley x john mactavish #ghoap #ghoap au #soapghost #soap x ghost #ghostsoap #john soap mactavish #ghoap fic #ghostofthemost141

[sayitaliano]

Studying languages tip #IDK

Reminder for my fellow language learners (not just Italian learners): do not just "listen" to your target language (and I mean also with subtitles), repeat out loud. Repeating out loud what you hear can help you fix in your mind the actual sound of a word and remember it better, and also recognize it whenever you hear it from natives. Do not just rely on how you remember the sound of a word, at least not in the first days you're learning it.

So for example:

1- search for easy youtube videos in which there are only words lists pronunciations. Kids videos generally will do. (Reminder if you're studying Italian I have posted a few audios in the "#audio audios" section and you can listen to them or ask me to make some more, talk slower or whatever). You can also search for kids' songs if you want, and break them down to easy words.

2- choose a song you like or by your fav artist (in your target language). Find the lyrics and follow your artist voice for a few times, then start singing along with them. It doesn't matter if some words will sound weird or be uncorrect or you'll end up saying "blabluojaos" instead of "macchina" even if you know how to pronounce "macchina": you're singing, following the rhythm and thinking about the pronunciation of the next words as well: it's a lot. Just take your time and remember, you can do it more than once and for a few days too. [I learned English and many vocabs more cause while I was having lessons in school I kept listening to English songs: for example I ended up learning by heart Linkin Park's songs and nowadays I can still sing Mike Shinoda's rap parts. So if I made it, you can too].

3- if you're watching movies, or anything you can stop and replay, try to stop and repeat especially the words you find "uncommon" or that you have never heard of. Listen to the actor/person saying them a couple of times, then repeat them a couple of times. You can also repeat the whole sentence you heard from the actor/person, note your word down and search for its meaning if it's not clear (it may also have more than one), and maybe try to use it in different sentences (make them up). [again, if you're studying Italian and need help with meanings, transcriptions -maybe you're not sure you heard a word correctly-, how to use a word... feel free to drop an ask or search in the vocabularies you can find on @sayitalianohome ]

Just beware: once more, especially if you're studying Italian, it may happen that the singer of your choice or actor/person speaking, may not use a "standard" Italian but a regional form or abbreviations or something like that. So keep in mind that you MAY learn words in a specific sound or with a specific use that MAY not always be the one we know/use in common Italian (but you can check it anyway). Back to my personal example: I have learned not just English but also Spanish by listening to songs. My "mistake" was that I kept listening to American English and South American Spanish: this is why when I listen to British/UK English and (Spain) Spanish, I still have some troubles in understanding some words (depends on the accent of the speaker tbh). But ofc you can ask for people to repeat, there ain't nothing bad in it. (And yeah, when I speak English I tend to use an American accent and same for my South American Spanish, cause those are the accents I am more used to and I learned better).

Anyway, don't be scared, sing, yell, talk out loud. It's gonna make a huge difference in your learning life.

#studyblr #langblr #languages #language learning #studying tips #language #polyglot #learning languages #languageblr #studying languages

[nordic-language-love]

i was curious if you could recommend any books/resources for learning Norwegian? (or just your favorite language resources in general) thank you!

Hi there!

In terms of books like textbooks:

The Mystery of Nils (A1/A2) and Mysteriet om Nils (B1/B2) are pretty great imo.

Norwegian Tutor from Teach Yourself has been an absolute life-saver for grammar

Also from Teach Yourself is Norwegian Short Stories, which has vocab lists for each story

Enjoy Norwegian is good for higher intermediate (although I've never really clicked with it)

Another one I never clicked with but is used in a lot of language schools is På Vei (A1/A2 level)

Some other resources:

Lesnorsk norskkurs - texts from A1-B2 level

I do actually think the Duolingo course is okay tbh (the audio's sometimes a bit strange, but as far as free resources go it's really good imo!)

Memrise is also a popular resource: here's a link to the first of their Norwegian courses (never clicked with it myself, but a lot of people like it)

Lingohut is also pretty good!

CALST is awesome for helping you learn to speak specific dialects

I’ve not tried using it, but Bnorsk seems to be a website where you can learn Norwegian for free

I also take classes on italki (if you're interested in giving it a go then lmk so I can give you a referral code and get you a few dollars off your first lesson. I've also taken lessons from a number of tutors and can maybe help you find the best one for you)

Here's a bunch of Norwegian instagram accounts you can follow

This is a website with set expressions and idioms in Norwegian

Bildetema is good for vocabulary - you see pictures with the Norwegian words next to them, and you can click on them to see how they’re pronounced. There are lots of different topics too!

ung.forskning.no is quite good if you're like B1 level and interested in science because the articles are quite short and basically made for younger readers so the language isn't so difficult (a number of them also have corresponding podcast episodes, so you can read the article to learn a bit about the topic and then listen to the podcast)

Drops and uTalk (both apps) also have Norwegian available to learn (I’m not a huge fan of them, but you might be!)

I also use the Anki app on my phone to create flashcards (there’s a free knock-off version and a legit version that costs like £20+. I use the free one and it’s fine).

Podcasts:

Norskpodden is a good podcast for learners as they also have a transcript

Lær Norsk Nå! is also aimed at learners

Norsklærer Karense has her own podcast too (A2+)

I quite like Smartere på 10 minutter as well because it's interesting and it's short and the presenter speaks in clear Oslo dialect. If you're still not used to listening in Norwegian, you can slow it down to half speed. (B1+)

Oppdatert is also not too long, the presenters speak quite clearly and it’s about current affairs (B1+)

E-books

While I absolutely do not endorse the author's awful transphobic views, I know a lot of people are interested in reading the Harry Potter books as a way to expand their vocabulary, and it sure would be a shame if you could find all the PDFs free online and not have to give money to that aforementioned author. (Side note: the translator uses "omforladels" as a translation for "sorry" which like no actual Norwegian person apart from maybe in some dialects uses ever. Also remember it’s a translation, and the translator has tried to maintain a sense of “Britishness”, so some of the language isn’t entirely natural)

You can also search ebooks by language (including Norwegian) and download them for free from here (definitely 100% not illegal in any way shape or form *shifty glance*)

If you prefer to buy Norwegian ebooks actually legally, you can do so here.

Youtube channels:

Special shoutout to Norwegian Done Easy because Markus is my italki tutor and he's awesome (plus I'm featured! So you can see my silly little face Norwegianing as hard as it can!)

Norsklærer Karense (I'm uhh not actually a fan BUT she has lots of useful videos for like A1-B2 level. There's also a lot of useful information about culture and moving to Norway and integration and test-taking)

Preben's Norwegian Academy (he's from Nord-Norge, so you get some dialect exposure too)

Norskkurset (it's not updated for a little while but there are some good videos there!)

Norwegian Teacher Karin (another one that's not updated for a while but still has some good videos)

Norwegian With Tor (for a little Tromsø dialect)

Hope that's enough to get you started/keep you going! Let me know if you have any questions :)

#ask #norwegian #norsk #resources #learning norwegian #norwegian langblr

[trulybetty]

oct' 07 x chestnuts

Prompt: chestnuts Pairing: Dieter Bravo x Bryony Morgan (OFC) Word Count: 982 Warnings: un-beta'd is the name of the game, barely a mention of the prompt, unabashed hippo content with a touch of spice with the mention of oral sex (f receiving) Summary: no clue how we started at chestnuts, through to hippos, but here we are - I just love these two

x. masterlist

Dieter's office was a paradox in every sense of the word—meticulously disorganized, both casual and sophisticated. A space Bryony had always suspected he rarely worked in, yet one that seemed to capture the essence of him so completely that you couldn't help but think it was an extension of his personality.

Bifold doors filled the back wall of the room that looked out to the garden behind his desk. Built in bookcases framed both sides of the room, all filled with various trinkets outlining both Dieter’s career and interests. His Oscar for ‘Hunger Strike’ stood amongst the trove, topped with a knitted hat Cricket had made a couple Christmases ago. The walls were adorned with paintings of Dieter’s own creations, framed and hung with care by Bryony.

“Conkers.”

“Con-kas?” Dieter repeated, a poor imitation of Bryony’s accent which earned him a pointed stare, “is this one of your weird British-ism things?”

Bryony shot him another glare, “It’s not weird, and it’s legit what they’re called.” she insisted, glancing at a ceramic hippo paperweight on his desk as if to imply that he was no stranger to 'weird.'

“Chestnuts.” Dieter countered.

“Conkers” Bryony reaffirmed, her eyes momentarily landing on the Oscar statue. Despite the hat, it looked oddly dignified.

Dieter chuckled, ripping the foil of a KitKat with a satisfying tear. “And they say I’m the one in this relationship that’s off balance.” 

“Well you are the man who is eating a KitKat, that he had my mother send him from the UK because they taste better than the American ones.” Bryony shot back, smirking as she looked over at the bookshelf nearest the sectional she was lounging on, it was filled with scripts, a mixture of fiction and nonfiction, and, of course, more hippos.

“Because they are,” Dieter said, defending his KitKat as if it were a point of honour. He snapped off a piece, biting into it with a satisfied grin.

“I know,” Bryony smirked.

“Châtaignes,” Dieter pronounced carefully, his mouth full of chocolate and wafer.

“Huh?” Bryony blinked, puzzled.

“Châtaignes,” he repeated again once he’d finished eating, “chestnuts in French, because I know it’s going to be your next question.”

Bryony smiled, because it was going to be her next question - she could listen to the man talk French, and he did at length, all day. He’d perfected his French lilt over the years since he started learning at twelve thinking it would help him with girls. 

His parents, European immigrants to the States well before Dieter was born, had long shed their own individual languages when they’d moved continents in an effort to assimilate to their new home. Though his relationship with his parents taut, he had a distinct memory of his mother talking about a French man who had courted her before his father came along. She still had romantic notions about the man decades later and owed it in part to the language he would speak which left a lasting impression on a young Dieter.

Bryony shook her head, amused. “You're insufferable.”

“And yet you suffer me,” Dieter replied with a cocky grin.

She glanced at the other trinkets around the room, particularly the hippo memorabilia. “Fiona still your muse?”

“My pride and joy,” he said, looking at the framed picture, signed in a childish scrawl as if the six-year-old hippo from Cincinnati Zoo had autographed it herself. “You know, they sent me a video update just last week. She's growing so beautifully.”

“You're the only adult I know who gets this excited about a hippo,” Bryony chuckled, amused.

“Jealous much?” Dieter waggled his brows, standing up to lean against the edge of his antique, walnut desk, which Bryony suspected had never seen a single day's work.

“Jealous of Fiona?” Bryony quirked an eyebrow. “No, although I wish I could get as much attention for just existing.”

“You don't need to be a cute hippo to get my attention,” Dieter said, the playful tone in his voice shifting ever so slightly towards sincere. “You've always had it.”

Bryony felt a warmth in her cheeks but chose to keep the atmosphere light. “Well, as long as I rank higher than a KitKat on your list of priorities, I think we're good.”

“You're definitely higher than a KitKat,” Dieter said, “but let's not get into dangerous territory by discussing where you stand in relation to Fiona.”

“Ah, so it's like that, is it?” She smirked, as she sat up on the sofa..

Dieter took another bite of his KitKat, savoring it. “Mmm, it's exactly like that.”

“This room is a trip, you know.” Bryony tapped the glass top of the surprisingly large coffee table as if to emphasize her point. It was held up by a bronze hippo with its baby underneath, “Only you could make this collection work.”

“You think it works?” He looked genuinely pleased.

“Absolutely. It's you, distilled into a room.”

Dieter chuckled and put down the remains of his KitKat, reaching his hand down to help Bryony stand from the sofa, “Speaking of things that work, I think it's worth noting that you fit pretty well into all of this, don't you think?”

She looked up at him, caught a bit off guard by the sudden change of tone as his arms wrapped around her waist.

Dieter eyed the obnoxious coffee table with a sly raise of his eyebrow, “No, Dieter.”

“What?”

“I’m not having sex with you on that thing.”

“I didn’t say have sex, in fact I didn’t say anything.”

“Dieter I know you better than you know yourself.”

“Well then Daff,” Dieter purred and before Bryony could protest found herself being lowered onto the glass table, the cold sting of the glass quickly replaced by the warmth of Dieter’s hands pushing up the oversized t-shirt she was wearing, the only thing she was wearing. “How about I reacquaint myself with you then?”

#october x 500 #autumnal offerings #dieter x bryony #dieter bravo fanfic #dieter bravo fanfiction #dieter bravo x ofc #dieter bravo x oc #pedro pascal character fanfiction

[tongue-ttied]

my avatrice headcanons because they’re adorable pt.2:

(also im sorry to all of you that i hurt with the last headcanon on my last one, unnecessarily sad)

-Ava’s a huge fan of taylor swift

-Beatrice is more of a pheobe bridgers fan / and a big fan of instrumental

-Ava would marry Bea with paper rings

-Beatrice listens to Taylor Swift when Ava isn’t around / they share a spotify account so Ava totally knows

-Bea won’t go out with Ava on a night out but still tells her to go have fun / Ava always leaves early cause she just wants to go home to Bea

-Ava flirts really hard with Beatrice when she’s been drinking and it gets Bea all flustered

-Ava is oblivious to everyone flirting with her when she bartends because she only has eyes for Beatrice

-they bake cookies together and Ava eats all the raw dough and Bea tells her she’s gonna make herself sick (which she always does)

-Ava hates her birthday because she was always alone / she forgot about it this year

(canonly in s1 e4 Sister Francis says Ava will age out in a month so that means Ava turned 20 while in hiding. s2 is two months after s1 but Ava said that Bea and her had only been at the bar a month so either they have only been in the Alps for 1 month or they’ve been there for 2 and but worked at the bar for 1?? / im thinking too hard about this)

my head canon is they’ve been in the Alps for two months but only worked at the bar for one please tell me if i’m wrong

-Ava let it slip that her birthday passed and Bea was sad she didn’t tell her about it / Bea then baked a cake, bought her a gift, made her a card and cooked her a nice dinner to make up for it / it was the best birthday Ava has ever had

-Beatrice thinks she’d be a terrible mother because of her own relationship with her family/ Ava KNOWS Beatrice would make an amazing mother

-Beatrice taught Ava german

-the few times Beatrice has fallen asleep reading on the couch she’s woken up to Ava asleep on top of her like a weighted blanket

-Ava has a tendency to get changed right in front of Beatrice because she really doesn’t grasp the concept of privacy around her / “we’re best friends Bea who cares if you see me in my bra!”

-Beatrice gives Ava piggyback rides when Ava claims to be “too tired” after training

-Ava likes to study all of the lines, scars and callouses on Beatrice’s hands and Bea just lets her / Ava knows all the stories of all the scars she’s ever seen on Beatrice

-Ava definitely calls Beatrice by other pet names / she’s definitely let ‘Babe’ slip a few times and played it off

-Beatrice likes to run her fingers through Ava’s hair when Ava rests her head in her lap while she reads

-Hans thinks they’re dating / that’s what the ‘glance’ was about he thought they were having a couples argument

-the pretty girl at the bar whispered to Bea “she’s been watching us the whole time, now she knows she’s not the only friend in the world”

-Ava always holds Bea’s hand or links their arms when walking around town so she “doesn’t get lost”

-The day that Ava had fallen and basically died, Beatrice held her so tightly the entire night and couldn’t sleep, she just had to make sure Ava was breathing the whole time, reminding herself that she was okay, that Ava was alive

-Ava eats off of Beatrice’s plate even if they’re having the same food

-Ava mimics Beatrice’s British accent sometimes / asks her to pronounce long or funny words just to hear how she says them

-Beatrice keeps buying new socks because Ava keeps loosing them / she’s a barefoot around the house kind of girl

-Ava is also a floor girl

-Beatrice is a morning person who likes to do long stretches, Ava is a night owl who likes to sit on their fire escape and look out at the town

-they’ve spent countless nights staying up until the sunrise just talking about anything and everything

-even though Ava can levitate she always asks Beatrice to grab things that are too high for her

#i tried to make this one less sad #i have so many thoughts about them #these are so random and all over the place #avatrice #warrior nun #beatrice x ava #ava x beatrice #sister beatrice #ava silva #ava x sister beatrice #love #lgbtq #gay #wlw #couple #headcanon #warrior nun headcanons

[fuckyeah-jessicabiel]

Jessica Biel for Vogue, February 2010

The Real Biel

You can learn all sorts of interesting things about a person on a road trip together. For example: Jessica Biel is a very good driver. She is behind the wheel of a Subaru heading north from Vancouver toward Whistler, one of the ski resorts hosting the Olympics this month. Because of record-breaking snow, Biel has decided to ditch the more traditional plans she’d made for our interview and hit the slopes instead. So here we are, side by side, snacking on trail mix and listening to the sound track to Where the Wild Things Are. In the car in front of us is Biel’s assistant and best friend, Lindsay Ratowsky, who is being driven with all of our bags and equipment. Our mini caravan left Vancouver in the late afternoon in a downpour, and now we are driving in the dark in a snowstorm. Wearing jeans and hiking boots, Biel, who grew up in Boulder, Colorado, and has been snowboarding since she was a kid, is utterly in her element. “This is very much a me moment: in the snow, in the Subaru, listening to music,” she says. “I feel really at peace in this environment.”

It’s a far cry from where we were two hours ago, when Biel had 40 pounds of ammo strapped around her waist and an M4 semiautomatic assault rifle hoisted above her right shoulder. We were on the outskirts of Vancouver in an empty warehouse the size of a Walmart, part of the soundstage where she has been filming The A-Team. Paul, a dashing fellow with a British accent whom Biel describes as the “resident badass,” was teaching her the finer points of racking and reloading. After Biel squeezed off several deafening rounds, Paul calculated the number of mistakes she made and then said, “Twenty-four!” She dropped to the floor and gave him two dozen push-ups. It was only then that I noticed that she is as thin as a teenage boy and all muscle. Her usual Jessica Rabbit curves have all but disappeared, the red-carpet Sex Bomb nowhere to be found.

Who is Jessica Biel? Let’s admit it: She is a bit of a cipher. The girls who read the tabloids think of her as Justin Timberlake’s on-again, off-again girlfriend; my aunt Nancy thinks of her as little Mary Camden from the mid-nineties WB series 7th Heaven; and most men under 40 think of her as the smokin’ hottie who let Adam Sandler massage her breasts in I Now Pronounce You Chuck & Larry. I think it is fair to say that Jessica Biel has not yet experienced a unifying cultural moment. In other words: She can still ride the subway, which, in fact, she tells me she just did the other day. “I talked to a girl who liked my shoes,” she says. “ ‘Oh, those are cute. Where’d you get those?’ ‘I got them at Barneys.’ ‘Are you from New York?’ ‘No, I’m from out of town.’ ‘Oh, cool. Nice to talk to you.’ ‘Nice to talk to you!’ ”

My own expectations were equally off-base; I imagined her as a sort of modern-day Raquel Welch. I thought she would purr. But that notion was shattered the instant I met her. It does not take long to figure out that Jessica Biel is a mellow creature, a young woman who appears to be completely at ease with herself and who meets the world on her own terms. I spent nearly two full days with her, and not once did I see her tense up. This is at least partly due to how she was raised. She describes her parents as hippies. “They are major outdoor people,” she says. “They rafted the Grand Canyon when they were in their 20s. They are an incredible couple.”

Her father, Jon, worked for GE for many years and ran his own business consultancy in Boulder. “He is extremely motivated and ambitious,” she says. “I get those qualities from him.” Her mother, Kim, grew up one of six kids in a small town a few hours southwest of Denver where Jessica and her parents both own cabins on adjoining properties. Her mother’s side of the family is part Native American: Those crazy-high cheekbones are shared by her younger brother, mother, and grandmother. When she tells me that her parents dehydrate their own food, culture their own vegetables, and make their own coconut kefir, I can’t help laughing. “I actually do, too!” she says.

One of the benefits of having hippie parents is that they tend to indulge whimsy. Handbell choir! Jazz and tap class! By the time Biel was in her early teens, she was training as a level-six gymnast and starring in local musicals. One summer she took a commercial-acting class. It led to a talent convention in Los Angeles, which landed her an agent and a scholarship to a kids’ acting school. “I was hooked,” she says. It was around this time that her parents started making sacrifices so she could be in L.A. for pilot season. “It was stressful, for sure: my mom leaving my brother when he was so little for months at a time; my dad having to deal on his own. Sometimes I look back and think, God, you guys were crazy for letting some twelve-year-old do what she wanted. I mean, they did everything for me.”

It paid off. In 1996, when she was fourteen, Biel was cast as the levelheaded eldest daughter, Mary Camden, on the weirdly successful Aaron Spelling series 7th Heaven, a treacly morality lesson dressed up as a weekly family drama about a progressive reverend and his family. It ran for eleven seasons and is—get this—the longest-running family drama in television history. But as the show became a staple in Middle America’s living rooms, Biel blossomed into a knockout and began to chafe at the limitations of playing the same Goody Two-shoes year after year. She wanted out. It is now part of showbiz legend—and one of Biel’s enduring regrets—that just a few weeks shy of her eighteenth birthday, she posed nearly naked for the cover of Gear, a magazine owned by Bob Guccione, Jr., and got her wish. If in the end it turned out to be a savvy move, freeing her from a stultifying character, at the time it infuriated her colleagues. Stephen Collins, her TV dad, called it “child pornography,” and Spelling released her from her contract after the fourth season.

Now, as she is focused, laser-like, on getting us through the storm, she seems thoughtful about the whole episode. “I really wanted to go to college, and it all kind of happened at the same time. I did this photo shoot; the photo shoot came out; it was terribly embarrassing. I had to apologize to everybody, including my parents. It was a big learning experience: learning how to have boundaries and how to say no.”

Not surprisingly, Biel has a lot of empathy for young girls dealing with adolescence in front of an audience. “I have this overwhelming motherly feeling toward them. Just do what you gotta do, girls! Hold it together! I wish everyone would just leave them alone.” Biel has clearly figured out the importance of maintaining some semblance of autonomy in a highly scrutinized life. She likes to drive by herself the eighteen hours from L.A. to Boulder with her dogs—even though everyone tells her it’s dangerous. When I mention that Gwen Stefani wrote the song “Just a Girl” about this very phenomenon—pretty girls being cautioned not to go anywhere alone—Biel says, “Rock on, girl. I feel her pain.”

Suddenly we hit a backup on the highway. There has been an accident. If we have a minor accident, it will add drama to the story, I say. “I was thinking that, too!” she says. “Actually, I was just thinking, Where are my gloves? Because if we crash we’ll have to get out, and we’ll have to be warm.” She laughs. “And then I took it to another level: What if I kill him? My other thought was, At least they would test me for drugs and alcohol and I would be clean. I would not go to jail. But you would be dead, and it would be horrible! There’s no good outcome!” We are laughing when we finally pass the scene of the crime. “What is she doing in a skirt?” says Biel, looking at the woman who has obviously caused this mess. “And high-heeled boots?” She looks over at me and smiles. “We are going to get there alive. I just know it. I have good karma.”

If Jessica Biel seems to live a charmed personal life (rumors of breakups notwithstanding), she hasn’t had such great luck in her career. Not long after we arrive at our hotel, we meet for dinner at the restaurant downstairs. Biel shows up wearing black Frye motorcycle boots, dark-blue jeans that look like leggings, a loose black scoop-neck T-shirt, a droopy red Steven Alan cardigan, and a chunky white Chanel watch. Once again, she winds up in the driver’s seat, engaging our waitress on the wine list and then talking me into ordering a Gewürztraminer. At one point she asks the waitress about the halibut. “Is it still in season? Is it nice?” It’s really nice, says the waitress perfunctorily. “I don’t know if I believe you,” Biel says to her in the most startling, matter-of-fact way. “Talk to me more about it.” The waitress admirably rises to the challenge. Finally convinced, Biel orders the dish (and cleans her plate).

The conversation quickly settles on her vexed post-TV career, which goes like this: ill-conceived remake of famous horror film; tragic Bret Easton Ellis adaptation; even more tragic Kim Basinger vehicle; meaningless third installment of Blade franchise; terrible movie; terrible movie . . . The Illusionist! Starring Edward Norton and Paul Giamatti, it is easily the best film Biel has been in. Though it was not a commercial hit, it is a pleasure to watch, and Biel is believable as a Viennese woman from the turn of the last century. “A lot of times people I work with have said, ‘Oh, this movie is going to be the one,’ and then nothing happens. But with The Illusionist I felt it more than ever, that people really started to see me differently.”

And then there is Biel’s run of bad luck with great directors. Cameron Crowe cast her in Elizabethtown, a film that flopped on a grand scale, and David O. Russell gave her the lead in Nailed, based on Kristin Gore’s novel Sammy’s Hill, about a woman with no health insurance who gets a nail lodged in her head and goes to Washington to fight for justice. “Jess was tired of being cast as merely sultry and was more than ready to throw down for all the weird behavior a nail in the head gives her character,” says Russell. “She auditioned and went for it—she is fearless.” Gore (Al’s daughter), who co-wrote the screenplay with Russell, spent three months with Biel on the set in South Carolina. “I think her range is something that has yet to be discovered by the larger world,” she says. “She also has this preternatural self-assurance.” The production shut down because of money problems with just one thing left to shoot: the scene where Biel gets the nail shot into her head. That was in 2008, and with each passing month it grows ever less likely that her most challenging film work to date will make it to the screen.

Meanwhile, the film industry has gone through a major upheaval since the recession. “The last year in this business has been harsh,” says Biel. “There’s no material. Nobody wants to make dramas. And that’s what we all want to do.” What is getting produced, she says, are “commercial movies—horror movies, big romantic comedies, and action movies. Those can be great, but you don’t want to do only those kinds of films. You can’t live on éclairs alone. You have to have a spinach salad every now and again.”

For now, however, she gorges on éclairs. This month she stars in Valentine’s Day, an ensemble romantic comedy, directed by Garry Marshall, that features a galaxy of A-list stars: Julia Roberts, Jamie Foxx, Anne Hathaway, Jennifer Garner, Patrick Dempsey, and so on. Biel plays a neurotic sports publicist and toxic bachelorette. “I really get to play crazy,” she says gleefully. “A girl who has hit the wall with wanting to find a man. And I get to do some broad comedy; it’s a little Lucille Ball-esque.” And who better than Garry Marshall to direct her? “She was so eager to do physical comedy, in particular, because she knew I worked with Lucy and with my sister on Laverne & Shirley,” Marshall says. “She sings a wild song in the movie; it’s kind of down-and-dirty singing, and it’s really great.”

Biel and Garner became friends on the shoot. “She’s incredibly girly and warm and open—all of the things she seems to buck against when she’s looking at roles,” says Garner. “The first scene that I did with her, she was drunk in the scene. It’s hard to play drunk, not to overdo it. But she did it in such a subtle, real, kind of pathetic but very, very deeply funny way. I was, take one, totally impressed.”

The dearth of good material has pushed Biel to diversify her portfolio, so to speak. Last August, she was cast alongside Brian Stokes Mitchell when the Los Angeles Philharmonic did a three-night concert version of Guys and Dolls at the Hollywood Bowl. Biel took everyone by surprise with what director Richard Jay-Alexander described as her beautiful, “silvery” singing voice. On the last night, she received a rousing standing ovation from 17,000 people. More recently, she landed a part in Lincoln Center Theater’s two-week-long workshop of the musical version of the Pedro Almodóvar classic Women on the Verge of a Nervous Breakdown, along with Salma Hayek, who plays the lead. “I think they are going to put it up in the fall,” she says hopefully. “And I think they will approach me again.” A girl can dream, can’t she? As far as Garner is concerned, Biel should: “There’s nothing between her and bigger things except for one job.”

The next morning we wake up to discover that the snow has turned to rain. By the time we arrive at the base of the mountain, there is only one gondola running, and the line stretches all the way through the village. Deflated, we decide to eat breakfast in a honky-tonk saloon that reeks of last night’s beer. Amid the German techno music, the Madonna/Justin Timberlake song “4 Minutes” suddenly blasts over the sound system, and we stare down at our plates awkwardly. Biel looks up at me with a big smile on her face and punctures the silence: “Dance break!” (We had another awkward moment in the car during our drive when Biel was talking about her style. “I like really überfeminine, classic-looking things mixed with something rougher around the edges. I’ve been looking at Rihanna a lot, checking her out. She’s got something going on that I am sort of craving a little bit.” I nearly choked on my trail mix. I could not tell whether this was a Freudian slip, some worrisome Single White Female voodoo, or a calculated little piece of spin designed to show me that she is unthreatened by the rumors that her man has eyes for the diva from Barbados.)

Biel and Timberlake have been an item since 2007 and for a long time looked like a happy couple. Recently, however, they have had to endure all manner of tabloid speculation about their private lives. Biel recently laughed off the rumors to a reporter, saying, “It’s definitely been weird and sort of bizarre to deal with. But you have to have a sense of humor about the whole thing. Honestly, I look at a magazine and they know more than I do.” Last night at dinner I brought it up and was met with steely resolve. “I don’t want to talk about it,” she said. “I don’t feel the need to clear anything up. It’s the most precious thing that I have in my life, and I care about it so much that I don’t care about what anyone says or thinks. I have just not addressed it in any real way, and I’m not going to. It’s mine. And I really like that about it.”

There is something refreshing about a girl with boundaries, someone who has her priorities in order despite the relentlessness of the tabloids and the strangeness of doing drills in some warehouse far away from her own life. And if there is a sense that potentially great things await Jessica Biel—that she has not yet shown us who she is and what she is capable of—it’s hard not to wonder what exactly is holding her back.

One possible answer came up during our dinner, when we were talking about her va-va-voom image—so at odds with how she really is. “When I see myself in pictures with makeup on, even to this day, I think it looks weird. My eyes get squintier and smaller. On the red carpet, I’m playing a character. As soon as I get off that thing I think, Oof, wipe that gloss off. I’m wiping and wiping and pulling my hair out and trying to change my outfit. I’m immediately trying to get comfortable. It’s really a part I play.”

One wonders why she can’t just play herself. In person she projects such a winning and natural beauty. As Jennifer Garner puts it, “She’s not just beautiful, she’s kind of on another level, but there’s an earthiness and a strength to it.” Too much makeup and the wrong dress seem to smother all that, and it’s a disconnect that clearly extends to the roles she chooses.

We eventually make our way up the mountain, and above 1,200 feet, it is snowing: The skiing is sublime. Not surprisingly, Biel is both goofy and confident on her snowboard. Afterward, we head back to the hotel lounge; her assistant, Lindsay, joins us, and Biel orders an old-fashioned. At one point someone took a picture of her on the slopes and she said to me, “Smile for Biel.” Now she explains: “My grandmother, whom we call Biel, thinks it’s very unbecoming of me not to smile for the paparazzi. So every time I see them I think, Smile for Biel!”

This is a reminder of why Jessica Biel is so grounded: Her family keeps her that way. When I point this out, she says, “I might just be way too boring to ever be a really great actress.” Great actresses can live boring lives, I say. It’s great stars who kick dust up everywhere they go.

“I don’t do that,” says Biel. “Maybe I should do a little bit more of that.” She laughs at the thought. “A dust kicker-upper might be kind of fun. . . .”

Lindsay pipes up: “Think of your life if you were like that, though. I would probably hate you. Your boyfriend probably wouldn’t be that into you. You’d be a big bitch.” But it’s clear that Lindsay thinks the world of her boss. “If you met her at a barbecue, you would never know that she was a movie star,” she says. “To her friends, Jess is the most compassionate, caring, kind, loving, wonderful human being that they know.”

“See?” says Biel. “Nothing that interesting!”

#jessica biel #vogue #vogue magazine #scans #2010 #magazines #cover #vogue cover #Interviews #articles

[consult-sherlockholmes]

Any tips on the British accent?

In a week I’ll have to fake it for some personal purposes. And I need your help.

Which British accent are you exactly referring to, given all the different accents depending on the area in the UK. But I assume you mean the received pronunciation of southern England.

The best way to emulate another accent is to first observe. Watch videos of people talking with your desired accent, listen closely, but also look how they move their lips and shape the words and try to recreate that. Many vowels and consonants are also differently pronounced in comparison to American English, so it is best to research that a bit, and maybe go to Cambridge Dictionary's website, where you can listen to recordings of words in both American and British english. Also certain vocabulary is more common in British English than in American English, that is also important to note.

Personal purposes? Are you trying to fake being British to show off?

#rp #roleplay #sherlock roleplay #sherlock rp #sherlock gives advice #i am not a linguist

[mariisntreal]

I can’t escape the feeling that I’m not smart enough. There’s more to learn, more to know, and I know nothing. I’m not a philosophy student who spends her birthday writing. I’m not an English lit student who reads every minute of the day. I barely know how to pronounce municipality (apparently, I can barely spell it either). I am a poser at heart. I listen to jazz and pretend I know everything. I answer questions with false confidence and accept the undeserved praise with open arms. But I know nothing, and I am nothing. I add documentaries and courses to my to do list, but they sit there collecting dust. If I really craved knowledge, I’d have it. But I am a poser at heart. Do I want to seem smart but not actually be smart? Is that what it is? At night I lay down and obsess over my behaviour during the day

Did I say the right things? The smart things? I dissect everything I did and said until there’s nothing left and I go to bed feeling dumber than I did when I woke up.

I read books with a dictionary by my side because of the number of words I don’t understand and have to look up. I use a dictionary instead of just googling the words on my phone because I’m a snobby, pretentious dick who wants to appear smarter. 

I have no socials, and while it’s better for my mental health, I secretly crave the surprise on peoples face when I tell them that.

“Wow, I could never! I love posting on Instagram” 

I know, that’s what makes me so much better than you. I don’t waste my time on rubbish like that. I spend my time writing and reading because I’m sooooo much smarter. Except I’m not better nor smarter. I don’t even know if my use of nor in the previous sentence was correct.

But I speak two languages! Surely that makes me a bit smarter than the average person? 

No, that’s not impressive, it would be slightly impressive if I spoke 3 or more, but who am I impressing exactly with two languages? My mother who laughs at my occasional pronunciation and spelling mistakes? Or my friends with the thick British and American accents who giggle when I let my Arab tongue slip. 

I know I’m a snob, I know I can be an asshole, but I need to fill this desire to be the smartest person in the room, the most impressive, the most interesting. I know nothing, I know nothing, I know nothing. 

It will drive me insane. 

Why can’t I know things? Like who painted that crappy old painting that’s hung in that crappy old museum. What was the technique used and what the artist wanted us to know. I don’t even have a favourite painting; my favourite movie is toy story and I have a regular degree in psych (a real smart person would have an honours degree). I’m 22 with no job and no great accomplishments. What gives me the right to demand knowledge when I don’t deserve it. I don’t deserve it. 

I study the flags and states in hopes that somebody will ask me to name them, and I’ll have my moment to shine. I read the news and look up interesting articles in hopes that I’ll get to tell someone about it and impress them. 

“Oh no I actually read an article; I don’t get my news from social media like other people”

What a piece of shit.

It kills me, it hurts me that I don’t know. What am I then? What am I if not an intelligent, charming, and interesting woman? I’m nothing but a fraud, nothing but a poser. There’s nothing inside me but a tangled-up mess of different desires I’ve had in my life that have never been satisfied.

I feel so small. I don’t know why I’m like this. I don’t think I’ll change. My worth is defined by my knowledge and smarts. By grades and praise. But maybe I’m not cut out to be a smart person. Maybe smart people don’t behave this way, smart people are just smart. They don’t act, they just are. Me on the other hand, I’ve been acting since I was young. 

But I do really want to know everything. I want to see and experience everything. I want to be wise for my sake as well! Not just for others. I realize there’s a problem in me, I know something is wrong with me. I need so much approval and validation. Boo hoo. Everyone does. 

I need to become everything. 

I want to swallow the entire world. I want to become the universe. I want to be God.

Even as I write this (supposedly for myself) I imagine you, the reader, and how you’d react to it. Would you maybe highlight something and always remember it? Or would you look away unimpressed and call my work rubbish. How lame…

But I’ll try to not care, I promise I’ll try. I’ll try (and fail) to ignore the voice inside me that craves your admiration. You. Person I’ve never met. Do you think I’m smart?

#personal essay #writing #essay #journal

[mediapen]

em your brain is sooooo big and youre so right lets talk about it. as someone from madrid (been here my whole life) trust me when i say that anyone who goes to the british council school here comes out with a very fluent british accent. if you ask a spanish person (esp in madrid) to speak english to you, youll immediately be able to tell if they went to a public/private spanish school (they have the typical spanish accent) or if they went to "el british council" as we call it (which youll have a british accent). so im genuinely interested to know if carlos deliberately chooses to make his accent more spanish in certain situations (its a very easy accent to imitate, hence it renders itself susceptible to very good impressions). i could genuinely write an essay about this i think, just analysing when he chooses to talk in certain ways its just so fascinating

YOU GET IT. kiss. KISS. genuinely thank you for the background - I assumed this based on most people adopting the accent they're taught second languages in but obviously didn't KNOW. and it makes it crazier honestly? like that everyone around him would've dropped the accent?! if he just spoke english as a second language I'd have nothing to say on this whatsoever, but going to a british council school and retaining your native LOCAL (!!!!!) accent in the second language but also being able to modify and drop it like he can? that's insane. like it absolutely indicates to me that it's a choice. also, I do think you can tell he's been educated in english - he has a big vocabulary and speaks really fluidly and easily, but again the heavy accent throws people off. idk it's really interesting.

I also think his default accent in english is the more spanish one - like, his radio messages are sometimes genuinely incomprehensible, and I don't think it's just the poor audio quality - I think the accent sometimes makes it hard to understand on first listen, especially when you don't have context as to what he's talking about. like... when the way he speaks isn't his primary focus, that's probably gonna be the more 'natural' accent.

++ re: impressions - I think he speaks english more slowly than a lot of spanish people, and the madrid accent seems to be less... idk. difficult for a native english speaker to copy? like, for ease of comparison - alonso sounds like he speaks with the front of his mouth. it's very light, he rolls every r but with the tip of his tongue, sounds kinda 'typically' spanish. and they're broadly difficult sounds for a native english speaker to imitate, right? but carlos sounds like he uses his whole mouth. he pronounces more of every word. all of which probably makes copying it easier? idk! obsessed!

#thinking about launching an ma in carlos studies PLEASE submit your essay as an application #hibi also mentioned in her tags that his italian accent is 'pretty solid.' which is a WHOOOOLE new level of fun to me. speaking english #with a heavy accent as praxis ✊ #answered #ma carlos studies

[sollucets]

I DO NOT KNOW IF THIS IS HELPFUL OR NOT but I keep meaning to share bc i do not know anyone else who would care lmao - แซนด์, phonetically pronounced Saaen (soft aae, like the word air in a "british" accent) but romanised Sand. The little garan mark above the d ด์ basically means it's there but not pronounced, usually because it's a loan word. Like in First's name, เฟิร์ส which is why you hear his name pronounced Fehd/Fuhrd.

Don't get me started on the fact this is only a rule until it's not. See: เรย์. Ray. Except the y is silent and the ae is a short, flat a like in the word cat. Except it's not because the letter y seems to be an ongoing and largely unspoken joke to the people of Thailand. And the a isn't flat because there's a y. But. And then.

Anyway.

Regardless, I will still be calling him San. Because sanray is too fucking cute and I like the fact they're going to be the antithesis of any kind of sunshine.

i did understand that thai end consonants are really more like a suggestion usually so i did figure that’s what’s going on with sa(e)n(d). i didnt know that that was how that a(e) was pronounced!! its very interesting thank you,,, i ought to somehow work on reading thai because to my knowledge literally all attempts at romanization are fucky and wrong

even in first’s name, i do know it’s there but to me i barely hear the ‘d’ at all. it just sounds like ‘fer’ with like a soft stop x_x. and oiiii what even is that for ray… we’ll just have to listen for his name said out loud i guess??

i’m mostly just waiting to see what they’ll go with for official subs at this point bc it’s just gonna be a style choice (and sometimes theyre not even consistent there like. in bmf i saw them spell his short name ‘kawi’ and his long name ‘bodkawee’ like….)

i’m biased against ‘sand’ personally for arbitrary and petty reasons, but if it’s consistently spelled that way in the official subs i will regretfully and reluctantly change. :(

#i absolutely do care thank you for sharing #also so i can bitch abt it lmao #my original ‘complaining about calling him sand’ post did get a fair bit of traction though so #i do think theres more than me who’ll care about it #rowan asks #jay c: #only friends

[simptasia]

HI OKAY, SORRY! No I am the Aaron accent/Dialect anon and may have sent other anons, but that's neither here nor there, but I come with updates? So I was really interested in this especially with your answer (which thank you so much for answering by the way I really appreciate it like so much! And never apologise for taking time to answer anons your time is your time!!! Play Sims 2 it's the best and if you do answer do it when you want to and have time to again it takes brain time to think of answers so don't like, apologise for that!!! :^D) BUT ANYWAY did some lil looking up the internet and I came across a study done in Antarctica where this exactly is happening which leads me to believe not only would Aaron accent shift but everyone else would as well? Here's the link (https://pubs.aip.org/asa/jasa/article/146/5/3327/993882/Phonetic-change-in-an-Antarctic-winter) to a really interested article and a TikTok (https://vm.tiktok.com/ZGJVt8mfm/) in case you're like nah I don't want to read all that, but the gist is they sent 8 British people, 1 American, 1 German and 1 Icelandic person to a remote station in Antarctica for work, there completely isolated from the world for a few months working and when they came back they were all pronouncing their vowels more similarly than before, and they were doing stuff like pronouncing their vowels 30 milliseconds longer and doing something called o fronting which is putting the o sound in the front of the word. SO WITH ALL THAT, I NOW BELIEVE THAT NOT ONLY WILL ARRON AND JIN YEON WOULD DEVELOP A NEW ACCENT. Sorry for the cap locks and super long explanation but It's so interesting cause okay let's imagine a world where none of them ever left they stayed on that island isolated from the world in a small community, they would start to see the beginning of a brand-new accent. Even though most of the islanders are American like i said there from all over so different pronunciations you would have Kate's Iowa twang mixing with Danielle's French while simultaneously mixing with Shannon's Cali girl style and getting drenched in The two Brits and single Aussies many slang words and ways to pronounce them then mashing that against Hurleys gorgeous Spanish accent (which I went and listen to god is there anything that man cannot do?) . Even if we follow a normal timeline where they make it off the island, they may be changes in Kate and Hurleys accent from hanging around Sawyer/ Charlie too much. Humans are human you copy stuff of your friends certain pronunciations copying quirks now take that to an isolated island in the south pacific. Again, so sorry to fill your inbox with this nonsense, but just imagine Ben and Locke's terrible divorce also ended up in their accents copying each other due to the nature of everything. Like imagine you hate this guy on the island and months later your accents are literally copying certain or mashing with their's to form a new one I would be so mad, I really would start biting people.

ooh wow i stand corrected, maybe Aaron and Ji (and other hypothetical island babies) would sound more weird than i realised!

again, don't say sorry. what's nice is that LOST is so multicultural that one's mind can lead to wonderings like this!

oh, oh, what you said about ben and locke there reminded me of a headcanon i have about hurley and ben. basically that because they're gonna spend so much time together, they're gonna start affecting each other. like hurley dresses neater (button up shirt + his curls in a poytail), ben starts being more casual (looser shirts and more unkept, like unshaven). and this idea includes hurley becoming more articulate and ben speaking less formally. it's not a full on uncanny valley transformation but they have influenced each other

legit, ben and hurley end up like, a good marriage

without the sex. but that's just my opinion

#i went off topic but i didn't know what to say #but you sent so much that i felt like i needed to say more than ''ooooh good shit!!!''

[tellthemeerkatsitsfine]

I’m listening to Andy Zaltzman’s interview on the WTF podcast, recorded in January 2021. I find Marc Maron incredibly annoying, for some reasons that are objectively justified and some that probably aren’t. I’ve sat through him twice before – once for John Oliver and once for Stewart Lee. Both times, Marc annoyed me hugely, but it was worth it to hear the guest.

He’s annoyed me in Andy Zaltzman’s podcast too. I’m a bit amazed at the number of new and inventive ways he finds to pronounce the word “Edinburgh”, managing to end it with the word “bro” a lot. “Edin-bro.” That’s one of my less objectively justified reasons to dislike him, probably, but it is pretty bad to not know how to say that properly if you’re such a significant comedian.

I’d say my least justified one is when he said to Andy, “So you grew up in London?” And I said, “No, come on, he grew up in Tumbridge Wells in Kent, a place he has described as ‘So conservative you were considered a bit of a leftie if you only voted Tory once in each election.’ Come on, Marc. How could you be so stupid as to think Andy Zaltzman grew up in London?” I then had to stop, take a step back, and remind myself that it is not at all reasonable to expect an American comedian to know where Andy Zaltzman grew up. Most British comedians do not know where Andy Zaltzman grew up. The vast majority of people in the world do not know where Andy Zaltzman grew up, it’s fine.

So I tried to check my anti-Marc Maron bias a bit, and once I did that, I realized… actually, you know what? Weirdly, Marc Maron might be the best person in the world to interview Andy Zaltzman. Andy Zaltzman tends to get evasive, to uncomfortably steer away from certain topics and it’s hard to tell when it’s genuine discomfort (which I don’t think an interviewer should press him on, I’m listening to this because I want to know where the most creative comedy I’ve ever heard comes from, but I don’t need to hear about anything he actively doesn’t want to talk about) versus just his social awkwardness making him sound vaguely uncomfortable about every topic. When I hear most people interact with Andy Zaltzman, they sort of know this, and if they get near most topics you can hear them expect to get the vaguely ironic or surreal reply. In this case, Marc Maron’s drawback as an interview who knows fuck all about his interviewee works in his favour. He asks Andy Zaltzman questions and expects to get an answer the way you would from a normal person, and when he doesn’t, he just repeats it. It’s kind of cool.

Marc Maron and Andy Zaltzman are wildly different comedians in just about every way, but they do have one weirdly specific thing in common, which is a… complicated relationship with The Daily Show. That highlights how different they are – Marc Maron spent years very publicly being a huge asshole about Jon Stewart, due to jealousy of Stewart’s success. And then sort of offered to apologize but only if he can do it for publicity on his podcast – seriously, fuck that guy (I’d say this is one of my more justified reasons to dislike Marc Maron). While Andy Zaltzman spent the first few years on The Bugle with a running joke where after John Oliver would tell one of his showbiz anecdotes about whatever celebrity he’d met through his Daily Show job that week, Andy would add that he had quite a good [insert different type of lunch meat each time] sandwich that week so they’ve all got stuff going on. He kept that up for so long that when I was relatively early in my Bugle listening, I made a bunch of posts on here saying I can’t figure out what’s going on with Andy Zaltzman, he seems to genuinely be totally unbothered by the commercial success discrepancy. When I got a hundred or so episodes into I declared that I’d figured out the answer, and it’s that Andy Zaltzman is just totally unimpressed by anything in the world that isn’t a bad pun or a cricket stat. He truly, deep down, does not want to meet Hugh Jackman. Episode 90 was the one in which he absolutely roasted John Oliver for committing the embarrassing transgression of winning an Emmy, and it didn’t sound like jealousy, it sounded like he understood awards ceremonies to be the stupidest thing in the world.

Cracks in that did start to show eventually, mainly when Johnny Showbiz’s Daily Show career became less about meeting Hugh Jackman and more about propelling him to get his own TV show and leave the rest of his career behind. But they were only ever the tiniest of cracks. He did his Comedian’s Comedian episode in 2014, just as this was starting to happen, and Stuart Goldsmith had to push him pretty hard, from a few different angles, to get the words “Yes, maybe at certain times and in some ways I have been a bit jealous” out of him, which felt like a massively out-of-character thing to say. And once he actually left, there may have been a short while of just the tiniest traces of bitterness in the way he used the once-purely-affectionate nickname Johnny Showbiz, and one time he took a moment out of one Bugle episode to say congratulations are owed to his former colleague on winning two Emmys in one night “Presumably for Most Elongated Departure From a Podcast and Least Enthusiasm For Physical Contact on a Football Pitch,” and he might have once shouted “Fuck you Percy Primetime, everyone in this room has heard of me!” upon finding three members of his stand-up audience who hadn’t heard of John Oliver. You know, little cracks. There was that one time when a reviewer called him a “left-behind sidekick" and he had what was, by his normally unflappable standards, a small breakdown, referencing that review with increasing frustration for several weeks’ worth of episodes, and recording an interview with himself about how he doesn’t want to be famous anyway and he loves writing in his shed.

So really, when you look at all that, Marc Maron might be the right guy to interview Andy Zaltzman. Both had reason to be bitter toward The Daily Show, one expressed this loudly and publicly for ages, while the other made like one slightly passive-aggressive comment on a podcast an average of every 1.5 years. One has built his comedy brand on relentlessly oversharing every single emotion he has for money, another does almost entirely political and sometimes vaguely surreal comedy, and sounds notably uncomfortable if he’d expected to get personal about anything. This is all relevant context for this exchange:

Andy Zaltzman: [John Oliver and I] met doing the live stand-up circuit, and he did little sketches in my first Edinburgh show, I did some stuff in his first Edinburgh show the following year, in 2002. We toured on the student union circuit – in my generation of British comedians there was quite a thriving student union circuit where you could go and experiment, and it didn’t matter so much if you…

Marc Maron: But that was better than clubs, right?

Andy Zaltzman: It was better than clubs, partly because, generally you were booked in to do a whole tour, so it wasn’t like you had to succeed at every gig to get called back. So we got to know each other pretty well then, we did some radio series together, then when John got the Daily Show job and left me doing an Edinburgh show alone instead of a two-hander in front of about twenty-five people a night as he went to the biggest comedy show in the world… um…

Marc Maron: And how did that go for you? How did you take that?

Andy Zaltzman: Well, I’ll be honest, it was a bit tricky at the time. [Marc Maron cackles in the background, like a man who was not expecting to be able to get a guest to talk shit about Jon Stewart-era Daily Show on this day, and is pleased it’s gone in this direction] It was about a month before Edinburgh started, and so… it would be an exaggeration to say I had to rewrite the show, because we hadn’t entirely got round to writing it at that point…

Marc Maron [audibly sensing blood in the water]: That must have been a horrible conversation.

Andy Zaltzman: Well, not really, because it was – you know – clearly a pretty big opportunity, so…

Marc Maron: No, yeah, I know. But still, you had to suck it up.

Andy Zaltzman: Uh, I guess so. And we’d also had two BBC radio series canceled round about the same time, and I found out my wife was pregnant, so it was a month of considerable upheaval… uh, for me.

Marc Maron sounded like he was having so much fun in that exchange. In John Oliver’s episode, he pushed John Oliver to talk shit about Jon Stewart and John Oliver refused to do it, straight-up shut down that line of questioning and said he knows how Marc feels about Jon but he doesn’t have a single bad word to say about Jon Stewart. Marc kept trying for a bit in a way that made things incredibly, painfully awkward, and he was clearly disappointed when he couldn’t get that, you could see he’d been looking forward to having on the Daily Show guy so he could find an outlet for his grudge against Jon Stewart. There’s such a contrast to how he sounds at this point in Andy Zaltzman’s interview, so excited to get the tiniest bit of commiseration about the shared experience of getting left behind by The Daily Show. To the point where weirdly, I may have started to sympathize with Marc Maron a tiny bit. And you can tell that Andy Zaltzman has no idea he’s been put in the middle of any of this, and is just trying to stumble through answers to the questions.

Although he may have had some idea, because he’s mentioned at other times that he had to rewrite stuff for their 2006 joint Edinburgh show once it became a solo show instead, which makes me think by saying they hadn’t written it before John left, he was downplaying how much effect that event had to avoid giving more bait to a shark that sensed blood in the water.

They then discuss whether Andy Zaltzman should do a show about having a baby, or a breakup show, the way some people win awards for doing these days, but the drawback is that he married young and it’s worked out ever since. I found that conversation hilarious, just because it’s funny to imagine Andy Zaltzman doing a show like that. It would be amusing if he did just one sometime, and didn’t explain it. An entire show about parenthood with absolutely nothing surreal, just true stories about the wacky adventures of raising teenagers, and then go right back to his usual stuff.

They also discuss Judaism, and I suppose that’s another thing they sort of have in common, both being Jewish. Again I find myself sympathizing with Marc Maron a bit, because you can hear that he’s so interested in learning what it’s like to be Jewish in Britain, and Andy Zaltzman keeps disappointing him. Marc Maron would have more luck getting John Oliver to talk shit about Jon Stewart than getting Andy Zaltzman to give a detailed an accurate account of Jewish communities in Britain. Andy Zaltzman, whose most personal stand-up material is probably the stuff about how much loves bacon and doesn’t even know when the Jewish holidays are despite the religion into which he was born.

Marc Maron then asks what the difference is between Oxford and Cambridge, after Andy mentions that he went to the former and John Oliver went to the latter. Which I thought was quite a funny question, even if unintentionally so. Weirdly, I am warming to Marc Maron more and more.

He asks Andy in about eight different ways for some basic biographical details about how Andy Zaltzman got into comedy during/just after his days at Oxford, and Andy Zaltzman is relentlessly more interested in explaining how ancient Greek plays can be applied to modern stand-up, and at this point the interview becomes a comedy of wildly mismatched personalities. He eventually gets the story out of Andy that he did one comedy gig that went very badly and then spent a year sub-editing articles, before getting back on the comedy circuit.

Marc Maron: And who was around? Who were the guys that you started with, that are still around?

Me: Oh! I can answer that one, actually, Marc. Have you ever heard of a drink called chocolate milk?

Andy Zaltzman: Well, John was starting round about the same time. Um, Russell Howard was starting ‘round then. Jimmy Carr, people who’d been very successful around then. Daniel Kitson was sort of the… the big… you know, the most successful comedian of my generation… creatively, him, he was, I think, you know, everyone of my generation, on the circuit, sort of looked up to. He was, you know, started doing stuff…

Marc Maron: Yeah, yeah, I heard about Kitson for years, and I think I saw, I saw one big show of his in London. I know he does – you know, he’s a, uh, unique person. Uh, doesn’t do the podcast, or talk, or, you know, function, necessarily, in a sociable way… but I’ve met him a few times, and I know that he’s revered.

Me: Aaaannnd there goes my sympathizing with Marc Maron. It was building up for a bit, gone now. Go fuck yourself, Maron.

I transcribed Andy’s answer word for word, including the stuttering and filler words, to try to get across just how much it sounds like having this conversation is akin to water torture for him. And how getting a straight answer out of him seems a bit like pulling teeth for Marc Maron. These two could have a sitocm together based on comically contrasting personalities, the oversharing American and the reserved Brit.

Anyway, that’s about halfway through the interview, at which point I decided to stop and write this down. They covered a bunch of other stuff too, about Andy Zaltzman’s familial, educational, and comedy backgrounds. Marc Maron got more out of him than most people do, just by not seeming bothered by the discomfort he created, which may be a good thing in some cases and a bad thing in other cases. Marc Maron talked a lot of shit about the Edinburgh Fringe Festvial, and Andy Zaltzman defended it.

This has gotten pretty long so I think I’ll post it now, even though there are forty-ish minutes left. I am quite enjoying this. Will get into the 2022 Bugle after this, and then presumably go back to having stuff to say about the actual comedy, I’ll admit that this entire post, and this entire interview, are pretty much only about comedian gossip. But it happens to be the exact side of comedian gossip I’m interested in. Marc Maron is clearly the man to go to if you want some gossip.

[sewi-li-suwi]

This is @anti-anti-anti-anti-wiz-council, asking anonymously because I can't ask from a sideblog. This ask is in response to your question in the tags about my use of "innit". (Obviously this whole ask is OOC.)

While "innit" originated as a contraction of "isn't it", it was my impression that in at least some British dialects it had come to be used as a general-purpose intensifier, even where "isn't it" wouldn't make grammatical sense. I did check a couple of online dictionaries to make sure before I made that post, and both the Cambridge Dictionary and Wiktionary seemed to confirm that impression, complete with sample sentences. ("They're such a wicked band, innit"; "You like listening to pop music, innit?")

That being said, it should be noted that the person playing @anti-anti-anti-anti-wiz-council is not an actual Brit, but an American attempting to affect an exaggerated British dialect for the character, so I make no guarantees that I'm using all these words correctly. (And there are almost certainly places I've used American spellings, because it would be hard to consistently keep track of that.)

(Oh, come to think of it, I already know one place I used American spellings—I wrote "color" instead of "colour". Whoops. Oh well.)

oh cool! yeah, i'm most used to it being used alongside dunnit (doesn't it), dinnit (didn't it) and wonnit (wasn't it), used for present tense verbs, past tense verbs, and past tense other stuff respectively. ig "won't it" /wəʊnɪt/ would also be the same sorta thing. i should also say that i i'm guessing the spelling of most of these, and they exist in my dialect primarily as loans from other dialects.

hang on, i can make this into a table (hopefully this works fine):

past present future

verbs: dinnit dunnit won't it

non verbs: wonnit innit won't it

i think in your examples ("they're such a wicked back, innit" and "you like listening to pop music, innit?"), i'd use "aren't they" and "don't you" instead, but it definitely makes sense that innit'd be used in all cases! it's definitely the most prevelant, and this is actually symptomatic of a wider process called grammaticalization - the way that content words evolve into grammatical markers. there're three main recognised processes:

semantic bleaching: word loses meaning (n/a in this case, but look at "i have to" or "i gotta" for a good example)

morphological reduction: word loses agreement with person, tense, number, etc, and becomes used in more places (seen in the examples you gave)

phonetic erosion: word becomes quicker and easier to pronounce (isn't it > innit)

anyways! thanks for sending the ask :D i really enjoy stuff like this

#also dw about using american spellings in places #i'm british and tend to use both ''color'' and ''y'all'' #linguistics #ask #sewi's stuff #yeah thanks for the ask #i enjoyed writing this :D

[jasunwuu]

The Advantages of Learning English Abroad Over Studying at Home

Imagine standing amidst the hustle and bustle of a vibrant city, where the air is filled with the rhythmic harmony of a foreign language. You are picking up the nuances of native English speech, the slangs, the idioms, and the cultural connotations behind the words. This scenario could well be your reality if you decide to take the leap and study English abroad, far away from your comfort zone. There are immense benefits to be gained from immersing yourself in a new culture and learning a language at its source. The experience not only enriches your learning journey but also enhances your understanding and usage of English in real-life situations. The same can't be emulated when studying at home. It's like comparing a San Diego Chemistry courses near me experience to studying the subject online through AmazingTalker - while the online course offers convenience and efficiency, the real-life experience provides hands-on practice and instant feedback. Similar comparison could be drawn when you take San Diego German courses near me, San Diego Hindi courses near me, or even when hiring San Diego English tutors near me, and San Diego Math tutors near me. The decision you make today could potentially revolutionize the way you learn, so choose wisely.

The Advantages of Living in an English-speaking Society

One of the key advantages of living in an English-speaking society is the chance to experience immersive learning. This form of learning goes above and beyond the traditional classroom; it exposes you to the real-life usage of the language which can greatly enhance your comprehension and fluency.

Benefits of Immersive Learning

Understanding Cultural Nuances: Immersing oneself in an English-speaking society allows you to grasp the cultural context behind the language. For example, the idiom "piece of cake" indicates something easy in English but directly translating it to another language might not carry the same meaning.

Practical Application: Living in an English–speaking society increases opportunities to interact with native speakers, thereby providing natural engagement with the language. This can be during simple tasks such as grocery shopping, attending social events or even while watching local television shows.

Accent and Pronunciation: Regular interaction with native speakers helps you to understand and mimic their accent and pronunciation. The phrase 'tomato' for instance, is pronounced differently in American and British English, and living there helps you distinguish and adapt to such nuances.

Vocabulary Enhancement: Immersive learning also accelerates vocabulary enhancement since you're regularly exposed to new terms and slang that may not be part of academic curriculum but are widely used in day-to-day conversations.

Real-Life Examples of Language Practice Opportunities

Studying abroad is a quintessential example of living in an English-speaking society that offers numerous language practice opportunities. One instance is joining local book clubs or discussion groups that enhance both listening and speaking skills. Another is volunteering in community services or local events that provide a platform to interact and connect with native speakers. Such experiences not only foster cultural integration but also present an engaging and interactive format to learn and practice English.

In conclusion, residing in an English-speaking society provides numerous advantages, particularly in terms of language learning. Immersive learning, in this context, presents a practical and engaging environment to master the English language, one that goes beyond textbooks and dives into the heart of everyday linguistic interactions.

Boosting Self-confidence and Independence through Study Abroad Experience

Living and studying abroad is not just about acquiring a new language or learning about a different culture. It's also about personal growth - the growing self-confidence and independence that comes with being in a new environment. These virtues far extend beyond language learning and have a profound impact on one's life in general.

Blossoming Self-confidence

While the initial idea of living in a foreign country might seem daunting, it could end up being one of the most confidence-boosting decisions you'll ever make. As you navigate through day-to-day activities in an unfamiliar environment, you're bound to encounter challenges. Yet, overcoming these hurdles is what builds resilience and boosts your self-confidence.

Being able to communicate in a foreign language with locals, mastering public transportation, or even successfully ordering a meal in a foreign language are all accomplishments that help you grow more confident. This newfound confidence feeds back into your language learning process, encouraging you to take more risks in communicating, thereby accelerating your progress.

Cultivating Independence

Living abroad also fosters a sense of independence like nothing else. Away from your comfort zone, you learn to rely on yourself for everything from managing finances to problem-solving daily issues. This independence sharpens your decision-making skills, resourcefulness, and adaptability - qualities that are invaluable for language learning.

Understanding a language is not just about vocabulary and grammar, but also about interpreting cultural nuances and contextual clues. As an independent learner, you're better equipped to explore these complexities, enriching your overall language learning experience.

The Winning Edge in English Learning

When you look at the English learning process, self-confidence and independence are key drivers. They motivate you to immerse yourself in the language, engage in conversations, question, learn, and make mistakes. They give you the courage to step out of your comfort zone and communicate.

In other words, living and studying abroad isn't just a fun adventure, it's also an effective vehicle for becoming a confident and independent English speaker, paving the way for success in the multi-cultural, multi-lingual world of today.

The Unforgettable Value of Connections and Friendships While Studying Abroad

There's more to studying abroad than just learning a new language. One of the most enriching aspects of this experience is the connections and friendships that learners make along the way. These relationships can be a cornerstone of personal and professional development.

Imagine being in a café in the bustling city of Seoul, trying to order a cup of coffee in Korean after studying it on AmazingTalker. The barista, appreciating your effort, starts a conversation with you. You exchange pleasantries and even laughter. This is just the beginning of a friendship that goes beyond language learning. You've not only gained a new friend, but a source of local insights and cultural appreciation.

Or, consider studying in Barcelona, Spain, where a classmate invites you to a family gathering. You're warmly welcomed, and over homemade paella and passionate conversation, you're immersed deeper into Spanish culture than any textbook could teach. You have the opportunity to practice your Spanish in a real-world context and forge relationships that extend beyond your time abroad.

Experience unique cultural opportunities and deepen your understanding of the local lifestyle.

Connect with people from all walks of life, broadening your social and cultural perspectives.

The friendships formed often become a support network, offering motivation in learning and exploration.

Real-life conversations provide excellent opportunities for practice and refining language skills.

In essence, the friendships and connections made while studying abroad bring life to language, adding a depth and richness to your experience that is irreplaceable. So, as you embark on your language learning journey with AmazingTalker, remember that language acquisition is not just about grammar and vocabulary. It's about the people you share it with, the friendships you build, and the cultural encounters you experience. It's these connections that truly make the journey worthwhile.

The Benefits of Studying Abroad on Your Resume

Studying abroad is not just an adventure of a lifetime; it's a valuable addition to your resume that can set you apart in the increasingly competitive global job market. How you might ask? Well, here's why:

Demonstrating Critical Skills

First and foremost, studying abroad demonstrates to employers that you possess certain critical skills.

Adaptability: By living and studying in a completely different culture, you show that you can adapt to new environments and situations.

Problem-solving: When you study abroad, you're bound to encounter unexpected situations. Navigating these challenges by yourself demonstrates your problem-solving skills.

Communication: Being in a foreign land often requires learning a new language or at least getting by with a different form of communication. This showcases your language skills and your ability to communicate effectively in diverse settings.

Independence: By taking the leap to study in a foreign country, you show a high level of independence and self-initiative.

Record of Achievement

Studying abroad isn't easy; it requires planning, determination, and discipline. The fact that you've successfully completed a study abroad program proves that you're persistent, responsible, and committed. It also reinforces that you're ready for challenges, a quality that most employers look for.

Global Network

Studying abroad provides the opportunity to establish a global network. You meet people from different parts of the world, which can lead to life-long friendships and valuable professional connections. This network can be beneficial in your future career.

In conclusion, studying abroad is an enriching experience that adds significant value to your resume. It demonstrates essential skills and qualities that employers look for, making you a more appealing candidate in the job market. So go ahead, take that leap, and kickstart your global career today.

Experience More While Learning English Abroad

Pursuing English studies abroad isn't solely about mastering the language - it's also a golden opportunity to immerse oneself in a new culture and diverse experiences. The recreational activities, relationships, and local traditions that students engage in can significantly enrich their language learning journey.

Discover New Hobbies and Cultures

Delving into local customs and traditions allows learners to understand the context and nuances of the English language in its natural setting. Whether you're sipping on a cup of traditional English tea or engaging in the merriment of Thanksgiving in the USA, these culturally immersive experiences can offer practical language use cases that prove invaluable in mastering English.

Likewise, picking up new hobbies, such as joining a local football team in the UK or a jazz club in New York, can expose students to English jargon and vernacular that are often omitted in traditional classroom settings. These hobbies can be additional outlets for students to practice English, with the added perk of making new friendships and building connections.

The Learning Advantages

The benefits of exploring local culture and hobbies while studying English abroad are numerous:

Contextual learning: Understanding language within cultural narratives and local activities enriches vocabulary and contextual understanding.

Practical application: Engaging in daily conversations and hobbies provides a real-life platform to practice language skills.

Cultural understanding: Gaining insight into traditions, celebrations, and lifestyle adds depth to the language learning experience and promotes global awareness.

Networking and socializing: New hobbies and local explorations can lead to interactions with native speakers and fellow learners, fostering friendships and support networks.

So, should you decide to embark on a journey of studying English abroad, remember that it's not just about the grammar and vocabulary. Embrace the culture, engage in local activities and hobbies, and let these experiences enrich your language learning journey.

Harness the Power of Language Learning with AmazingTalker

AmazingTalker is an incredible resource for those eager to enhance their language skills from the comfort of their own homes. With a focus on providing customized, one-on-one teaching, AmazingTalker ensures that every single lesson is tailored to your unique learning needs. The advantages of using AmazingTalker are multifold, especially if you are on the journey of learning English.

Personalized Learning Experience

With AmazingTalker, a personalized learning experience is not just a promise, but a given. Here's why:

Customized teaching materials: Every tutor uses tailor-made learning materials that cater to your specific language aspirations and proficiency level.

One-on-One teaching: You can benefit from individual lessons that are designed to help you learn at your own pace, without any distractions.

Unmatched Flexibility and Convenience

AmazingTalker understands that your time is precious, and learning should fit seamlessly into your schedule. Here are some features that provide unmatched flexibility:

No contracts: You won't be tied down by any long-term contracts. Simply pay as you learn.

Transparent pricing: Know exactly what you're paying for. No hidden fees, no surprises at the checkout.

Flexible lesson options: Choose from a wide range of lesson options. Whether you prefer a quick 25-minute trial lesson or longer sessions, AmazingTalker's got you covered.

Handpicked Tutors

All tutors on AmazingTalker are pre-vetted to ensure they have the qualifications and experience to provide top-class language learning services. Besides, you even get to choose your tutor:

Transparent qualifications and experience: You can review your tutor's credentials, experience, and student reviews before making your choice.

Choose based on budget, requirements, and schedule: With the liberty to choose tutors based on your budget, learning objectives, and schedule, you are assured of a learning experience that suits you best.

Broad Range of Language Courses

AmazingTalker offers learning solutions in a whopping 48 different languages, including English, Japanese, Korean, Spanish, French, and German. The English courses, in particular, are quite popular and come with a wide range of resources designed to ensure comprehensive language acquisition.

In a nutshell, AmazingTalker is a one-stop-shop for all your language learning needs. It offers a truly personalized, flexible, and engaging learning experience that can help you master English or any other language you choose to learn. Dive in and start your language learning journey today!

Wrapping Things Up

In summation, we've dived deep into the compelling reasons why studying English abroad is an enriching and transformative experience. We talked about how it enhances your language proficiency, exposes you to various cultures, and sharpens your personal growth and adaptability. But initiating such a step can indeed be daunting. That being said, with resources like AmazingTalker, you are never alone. This platform is designed to connect you with top-notch English tutors from around the globe, all in an endeavor to support your language learning journey. So why not broaden your horizons and leap into this exciting adventure? Remember, the world is a book, and those who do not travel read only a page. It's time to turn the page. Dive in, start learning, and start experiencing with AmazingTalker.

#study abroad #exchange

[fuckround-findout]

my fucking mom

So recently my mom started listening to a podcast about paranormal stuffs and possession and demons ya know things like that. And the main (?) person talking is this dude with a British accent, and he pronounces the word 'demons' the same way me and my sister do. We pronounce it 'demonds' like with an extra d at the end.

So she's come to the conclusion that we are closet british...... Yes closet british.

#closet british #im so done #family #fucking why #paranormal podcast #british #accent #moms are weird saga