Marry My Dead Body
Movies watched in 2023
Marry My Dead Body (2023, Taiwan)
Director: Cheng Wei Hao
Writer: Cheng Wei Hao & Sharon Wu (based on a story by Lai Chih Liang
Mini-review:
I had so much fun watching this! I feel like the movie's tonal shifts and mixtures might be a bit too jarring for some people, but they worked perfectly for me. Most of the comedy lands pretty well, and the dramatic moments strike a nerve. There are even some effective jump-scares here and there! But the thing that takes the film to the next level is the acting. Greg Hsu and Austin Lin deliver flawless performances that really draw you in. People expecting a full-on gay romance will be disappointed, cause that's not what the story is about at all, but the chemistry between these two actors is fantastic and energetic. The directing is also dynamic and keeps you on the edge of your seat. That being said, the movie is not perfect. It tends to represent gay people in a way that feels somewhat stereotypical, and I think it could have delved much more into the social issues it addresses. I know the film has the best of intentions, but yeah, it could still be better in that regard. Anyway, Marry My Dead Body is a very fun experience, filled with humor, drama, action and great performances.
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I'm sure all one of my followers were waiting with bated breath for my daily sh*tpost, but wait no longer, for I am here! Time for Kuan Yin 2, Electric Boogaloo!
You know how I said in my last post that Miao Shan/Kuan Yin's family all moved to live with her in the Southern Seas? WELL I may have skimmed over a FEW details about the trip. Nothing big, you know, just your standard kidnapping.
You see, on the way to the mountain the king and queen get kidnapped by the White Elephant and the Green/AZURE Lion. No one you know, I'm sure. But don't worry, the kidnapping gets fixed with the help of Ao Guang and someone my book calls the "Red Child Devil."
What.
I'm sorry,
WHAT?!
Those that haven't read JttW may not understand my confusion, so allow me to elaborate.
In JttW, Kuan Yin is present during Monkey's rampage through Heaven as well as his sealing under Five Phases Mountain. Then, after Buddha creates the sacred macguffin that is the driving force of the entire plot, she goes and chooses the Scripture Pilgrim and his dum-dum disciples around 500 years later. This means that Kuan Yin was already at least 500 years old by the time the story really gets going and the pilgrim posse meets Hong Hai'er aka Red Boy aka Red Child Devil aka RED SON. She takes him on as her disciple and nothing seems TOO wierd until you think about the timeline of events.
Kuan Yin was still in her 20's or maybe 30's when her family moved in with her in the Southern Seas yet Red Boy, a character she doesn't become affiliated with until she's at least 500 (maybe older, the length of Wukong's imprisonment is vague) is already helping her out??
You might argue that Red might just be a bit older than we thought, until you remember that his father the Bull Demon King is Wukong's sworn brother and definitely would have told Monkey all about his kid even IF said child was sent away to be raised by another diety to control his fire powers. This man had his son's date of birth memorized to the SECOND, you think he'd skimp on bragging about his kid to his friends? Yet in JttW, neither Monkey nor Red seem to know each other. Monkey only even learns Red is his sworn brother's son because some local mountain gods tell him, not one of them recognizing the other.
This is likely a case of mythology not really holding together under scrutiny because it wasn't MADE to, as is often the norm. Most videos by OSP will show many more examples. Here, Red was probably added to the list of rescuers because he was associated with Kuan Yin in later bits of folklore and mythology without anyone taking too close a look at it because they weren't really interested in that.
Anyway, enough about my Red Son tangent, didn't I mention something about Azure Lion? Yes, he and Yellow Tusk are there kidnapping Kuan Yin's parents. Why? Who knows! But they end the story being caught and forced to be the mounts of Kuan Yin's older sisters, which could wring out some juicy character drama if they ever met the goddess herself in more modern media.
Sh*tpost Masterlist
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Chen Kuan-Tai in The Boxer from Shantung / 馬永貞 (1972)
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Chinese surnames that are more common in Taiwan
Recently I realized that I’ve met a lot of people with the surname Hung but virtually no Hongs. Hung is a romanization of 洪 used in Taiwan (it's Hong in pinyin). So why have I met so many Hungs but not many Hongs? It turns out that in Taiwan, 洪 is the 14th* most common surname, but in Mainland China it’s way down at 107th**!
After learning this, I realized that 洪 is not the only surname for which I've noticed this imbalance. Using rankings I found online, I calculated the differences in ranking and also the "quotient" (rank in Mainland divided by rank in Taiwan) for over 200 surnames.
This list consists of surnames "significantly" more common in Taiwan ("significant" means quotient > 2). I’m focusing on surnames for which my personal observations line up with the numbers. The rest of the surnames meeting the criteria are under the cut.
List order: By rank in Taiwan, from most to least common
List format: 简体字 | 繁體字 pinyin (Taiwanese-style romanization)
蔡 Cài (Tsai)
Taiwan rank: 9
Mainland rank: 44
Difference: 35
Quotient: 4.888888889
洪 Hóng (Hung)
Taiwan rank: 14
Mainland rank: 107
Difference: 93
Quotient: 7.642857143
邱 Qiū (Chiu)
Taiwan rank: 16
Mainland rank: 77
Difference: 61
Quotient: 4.8125
曾 Zēng (Tseng)
Taiwan rank: 17
Mainland rank: 38
Difference: 21
Quotient: 2.235294118
廖 Liào
Taiwan rank: 18
Mainland rank: 66
Difference: 48
Quotient: 3.666666667
赖 | 賴 Lài
Taiwan rank: 19
Mainland rank: 98
Difference: 79
Quotient: 5.157894737
叶 | 葉 Yè (Yeh)
Taiwan rank: 22
Mainland rank: 49
Difference: 27
Quotient: 2.227272727
庄 | 莊 Zhuāng (Chuang)
Taiwan rank: 24
Mainland rank: 138
Difference: 114
Quotient: 5.75
江 Jiāng (Chiang)
Taiwan rank: 26
Mainland rank: 79
Difference: 53
Quotient: 3.038461538
简 | 簡 Jiǎn (Chien)
Taiwan rank: 32
Mainland rank: 224
Difference: 192
Quotient: 7
游 Yóu (Yu)
Taiwan rank: 35
Mainland rank: 166
Difference: 131
Quotient: 4.742857143
詹 Zhān (Chan)
Taiwan rank: 37
Mainland rank: 152
Difference: 115
Quotient: 4.108108108
施 Shī (Shih)
Taiwan rank: 39
Mainland rank: 105
Difference: 66
Quotient: 2.692307692
颜 | 顏 Yán (Yen)
Taiwan rank: 45
Mainland rank: 110
Difference: 65
Quotient: 2.444444444
柯 Kē (Ko)
Taiwan rank: 46
Mainland rank: 188
Difference: 142
Quotient: 4.086956522
卓 Zhuó (Chuo or Cho)
Taiwan rank: 61
Mainland rank: 256
Difference: 195
Quotient: 4.196721311
Additional surnames meeting the criteria:
The first 4 surnames are so common everywhere that I haven't observed an asymmetry. Thus, they are listed down here.
陈 | 陳 Chén
Taiwan rank: 1
Mainland rank: 5
Difference: 4
Quotient: 5
林 Lín
Taiwan rank: 2
Mainland rank: 16
Difference: 14
Quotient: 8
黄 | 黃 Huáng
Taiwan rank: 3
Mainland rank: 8
Difference: 5
Quotient: 2.666666667
许 | 許 Xǔ (Hsu or Shu)
Taiwan rank: 11
Mainland rank: 35
Difference: 24
Quotient: 3.181818182
翁 Wēng
Taiwan rank: 47
Mainland rank: 177
Difference: 130
Quotient: 3.765957447
阮 Ruǎn (Juan)
Taiwan rank: 62
Mainland rank: 189
Difference: 127
Quotient: 3.048387097
蓝 | 藍 Lán
Taiwan rank: 67
Mainland rank: 260
Difference: 193
Quotient: 3.880597015
古 Gǔ (Ku)
Taiwan rank: 70
Mainland rank: 208
Difference: 138
Quotient: 2.971428571
纪 | 紀 Jǐ or Jì (Chi)
Taiwan rank: 71
Mainland rank: 157
Difference: 86
Quotient: 2.211267606
连 | 連 Lián (Lien)
Taiwan rank: 73
Mainland rank: 239
Difference: 166
Quotient: 3.273972603
欧 | 歐 Ōu
Taiwan rank: 75
Mainland rank: 161
Difference: 86
Quotient: 2.146666667
巫 Wū
Taiwan rank: 86
Mainland rank: 283
Difference: 197
Quotient: 3.290697674
官 Guān (Kuan)
Taiwan rank: 116
Mainland rank: 274
Difference: 158
Quotient: 2.362068966
Sources:
*As of 2018, via 台湾姓氏 (Wikipedia)
**As of 2020, via 2020年最新百家姓氏排名,快来看看你排第几? (Sohu)
See similar posts:
Chinese surname ranking analysis
A guide to Taiwanese name romanization
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It was an amazing competition. I'm a bit sad to see my husband's career end, but he's had an amazing career, and to end it with a fourth (!!!!) world title is incredible.
If you didn't see the press conference - yes, he's done. He's had a recurring back injury, and while he skates through it, it's causing him and more problems. He and I also want to move on to the next phase in our lives, and we can't do that if we're both competing. He's ready to move on and has nothing left he wants to do.
Free Program
Guang-hong de la Iglesia - CHN - 224.26
Otabek Altin - KAZ - 221.69
Seung-gil Lee - KOR - 220.34
Emil Nekola - CZE - 218.79
Kenjirou Minami - JPN - 210.94
Jean-Jacques Leroy - CAN - 208.37
Paul Kuan Yim Han - FRA - 206.90
Adam Loughton - GBR - 206.48
Louis Leroy - CAN - 204.53
Michael Anderson - USA - 204.27
Alexander Carpenter - USA - 199.47
Andrin Caspari - SUI - 180.68
Souta Yamada - JPN - 173.13
Nikolais Januais - LAT - 168.38
Maskim Semenjov - EST - 163.49
Issak Ashenkazi - ISR - 162.76
Gi-joon Khan - KOR - 161.44
Dante Sebastiani - ITA - 160.02
Roman Khasanov - KAZ - 154.17
Daniel Vargas - MEX - 152.48
Ambrosi Lomdize - GEO - 149.47
Justin Hwang - CAN - 149.21
Devit Kazarian - ARM - 140.53
Magnar Holberg - SWE - 135.25
Overall
Otabek Altin - KAZ - (1, 2) - 335.14 @otabekvoiceblog
Guang-hong de la Iglesia - CHN - (3, 1) - 334.38 @guanghongvoice
Seung-gil Lee - KOR - (4, 3) - 330.27
Emil Nekola - CZE - (9, 4) - 320.45
Jean-Jacques Leroy - CAN - (2, 6) - 319.24 @jjleroy-rp
Kenjirou Minami - JPN - (5, 5) - 316.21
Adam Loughton - GBR - (6, 8) - 310.18
Louis Leroy - CAN - (8, 9) - 306.40
Michael Anderson - USA - (11, 10) - 305.26
Alexander Carpenter - USA - (10, 11) - 300.72
Paul Kuan Yim Han - FRA - (22, 7) - 284.39
Souta Yamada - JPN - (7, 13) - 280.85
Andrin Caspari - SUI - (12, 12) - 274.09
Nikolais Januais - LAT - (15, 14) - 257.80
Dante Sebastiani - ITA - (13, 18) - 253.12
Gi-joon Khan - KOR - (16, 17) - 249.65
Maskim Semenjov - EST - (17, 15) - 247.57
Issak Ashenkazi - ISR - (18, 16) - 243.25
Ambrosi Lomdize - (15, 21) - 241.55
Roman Khasanov - KAZ - (20, 19) - 243.19
Daniel Vargas - MEX - (19, 20) - 232.67
Justin Hwang - CAN - (21, 22) - 227.21
Devit Kazarian - ARM - (24, 23) - 213.99
Magnar Holberg - SWE - (23, 24) - 211.45
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蓮花空行身染愛(Liân-hue Khong-hīng sin jiám ài)
Lotus Dakini Dyed in Love by Collage
又閣是彼个 無代無誌想著的形影
iū-koh sī hit ê, bô-tài-bô-tsì siūnn tio̍h ê hîng-iánn
There it is again, that figure I remembered out of the blue
親像一陣風 吹落來 是春風少年
tshin-tshiūnn tsi̍t tsūn-hong, tshue loh lâi, sī tshun hong siáu-liân
It came over me like a passing breeze - that unfettered youth
坐嘛是思念 坐袂牢 真無聊的思念
tsē mà-sī su-liām, tsē bē tiâu, tsin bô-liâu ê su-liām
I sit here and reminisce, but it doesn’t linger - such a restless thought
倒咧眠床頂 ���月娘 笑��个暗暝
tó leh bîn-tshn̂g tíng, hōo gue̍h-niû tshiò kui-ê àm-mî
Laying on the bed, making the moon laugh until late into the night
我行過你的世界
guá kiânn-kuè lí ê sè-kài
I’ve moved past your world
啥物我攏無愛
siánn-mih guá lóng bô ài
And I don’t want anything
只想欲佇你心內(寫一條歌)
tsí siūnn beh tī lí sim-lāi(siá tsi̍t tiâu kua)
only your heart (to write a song)
車行過 *𪜶的期待
tshia kiânn-kuè in ê kî-thāi
Cars passed by your expectations
這站閣無落來
tsit tsām koh bô loh-lâi
And didn’t stop at this station
無想欲對誰交代(心內驚驚)
bô siūnn beh tuì siáng kau-tài��sim-lāi kiann-kiann)
Without offering an explanation (hearts unsteady)
想起我彼暗小可仔歹勢
siūnn-khí guá hit-àm sió-khuá-á pháinn-sè
I realize I feel sorry about that night
予你揣著我
hōo lí tshuē-tio̍h guá
I made you realize that I
規身軀藏無好勢的委屈
kui-sing-khu tshàng bô hó-sè ê uí-khut
Can’t properly hide my misgivings
風 中的飛龍咧吼
hong-tiong ê pue-liông leh háu
The dragon amidst the clouds is roaring
聲 聲予天搖地動
siann-siann hōo thinn-iô tē-tāng
Causing the earth to shake
愛你的傳說寫佇頂懸
ài lí ê thuân-suat siá tī tíng-kuân
The legend of our love is written in the sky
感情紲來愈飛愈懸
kám-tsîng sua-lâi lú-pue lú-kuân
Feelings also grow the higher it flies
花 開佇你蹛的樓
hue khui-tī lí tuà ê lâu
Flowers bloom at your doorstep
想 當時欲綴你走
siūnn tong-sî beh tuè lí tsáu
Almost as if they intend to go with you
多情的雨崁著目睭
to-tsîng ê hōo kham tio̍h ba̍k-tsiu
The passionate rain conceals your eyes
你的代誌講袂清楚
lí ê tài tsì kóng bē tshing-tshó
Your affairs are can’t be told clearly*
看你行過千山萬水
khuànn lí kiânn-kuè tshian-san-bān-suí
Watching you traverse a thousand mountains and ten thousand waters
手內薔薇微微仔芳
tshiú-lāi tshiông-bî bî-bî-á phang
The rose at hand lightly fragrant
行踏輕鬆跤步的我 (恬恬佇遮攏無出聲)
kiânn ta̍h khin-sang kha-pōo ê guá (tiām tiām tī tsia lóng bô tshut-siann)
And I light on my feet (am here quietly, without a sound)
日子過一工閣一工
ji̍t-tsí kuè tsi̍t-kang koh tsi̍t-kang
Days pass, one after another
你的一切攏猶未放
lí ê it tshè lóng iá-buē pàng
And you still have not let it go
越頭欲揣過去的我
ua̍t thâu beh tshuē kuè-khì ê guá
A turn of the head, and you want to find the departed me
煞來袂記家己的名
suah-lâi bē kì ka-kī ê miâ
How could you have forgotten your own name
是我欲陪你流浪
sī guá beh puê lí liû-lōng
It is I who wants to lead you astray
長路終點滿天花雨
tn̂g-lōo tsiong-tiám muá-thinn hue-ú
At the end of the long road are clear skies, flowers, and rain
雺霧內底戇神
bông-bū lāi-té gōng-sîn
Dazed in the middle of the fog
千年流轉你的世界
tshian-nî liû-tsuán lí ê sè-kài
Your world is a cycle of death and rebirth*
自作多情的人
tsū-tsok-to-tsîng ê lâng
Before a self indulgent person
眼前地獄家己揀的
gán-tsiân tē-ga̍k ka-kī kíng ê
Is a hell of their own choosing
天上 地下 人間
thian-siōng, tē-hā, jîn-kan
Above heaven, below hell -- the mortal world
四方妖孽請恁退下
sù-hong iau-gia̍t tshiánn lín thè-hā
Quartet of demons*, please back down
這繁華世間
tse huân-hua sè-kan
This prosperous world
眾生有情人
tsiòng-sing ū-tsîng-lâng
Where everyone has loved ones
有情生煩惱(甘願受罪)
ū-tsîng senn huân-ló(kam-guān siū-tsuē)
As such are troubled (yet willing to suffer)
心狂閣火著
sim-kông koh hué-to̍h
They set their hearts ablaze
明知會艱苦
bîng tsai ē kan-khóo
Knowing it will one day bring unhappiness
千錯萬錯 (攏佮你無關)
tshian-tshò-bān-tshò(lóng ka̍h lí bô-kuan)
Tens of millions of faults (all have nothing to do with you)
* - the original phrasing is in reference to concepts/phrasing that exist in reference to religion that I have only found information on in very formal Chinese, however I am not skilled enough to translate properly, as such the translation is lacking.
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a o e i i er ai ei ao ou an en ang eng ong i ia iao ie iu ian in iang ing iong u ua uo uai ui uan un uang ueng ü üe üan ün a o e er ai ao ou an en ang eng yi ya yao ye you yan yin yang ying yong wu wa wo wai wei wan wen wang weng yu yue yuan yun b ba bo bai bei bao ban ben bang beng bi biao bie bian bin bing bu p pa po pai pei pao pou pan pen pang peng pi piao pie pian pin ping pu m ma mo me mai mei mao mou man men mang meng mi miao mie miu mian min ming mu f fa fo fei fou fan fen fang feng fu d da de dai dei dao dou dan den dang deng dong di diao die diu dian ding du duo dui duan dun t ta te tai tei tao tou tan tang teng tong ti tiao tie tian ting tu tuo tui tuan tun n na ne nai nei nao nou nan nen nang neng nong ni niao nie niu nian nin niang ning nu nuo nuan nü nüe l la le lai lei lao lou lan lang leng long li lia liao lie liu lian lin liang ling lu luo luan lun lü lüe g ga ge gai gei gao gou gan gen gang geng gong gu gua guo guai gui guan gun guang k ka ke kai kei kao kou kan ken kang keng kong ku kua kuo kuai kui kuan kun kuang h ha he hai hei hao hou han hen hang heng hong hu hua huo huai hui huan hun huang z za ze zi zai zei zao zou zan zen zang zeng zong zu zuo zui zuan zun c ca ce ci cai cao cou can cen cang ceng cong cu cuo cui cuan cun s sa se si sai sao sou san sen sang seng song su suo sui suan sun zh zha zhe zhi zhai zhei zhao zhou zhan zhen zhang zheng zhong zhu zhua zhuo zhuai zhui zhuan zhun zhuang ch cha che chi chai chao chou chan chen chang cheng chong chu chua chuo chuai chui chuan chun chuang sh sha she shi shai shei shao shou shan shen shang sheng shu shua shuo shuai shui shuan shun shuang r re ri rao rou ran ren rang reng rong ru rua ruo rui ruan run j ji jia jiao jie jiu jian jin jiang jing jiong ju jue juan jun q qi qia qiao qie qiu qian qin qiang qing qiong qu que quan qun x xi xia xiao xie xiu xian xin xiang xing xiong xu xue xuan xun
NAKU 🫵
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Boys Planet Dual Position Battle, final bits and thoughts
This recap will cover the final point reveals from the end of episode 7, as well as my final thoughts on the performances, including my own ranking and my analysis of MNET screentime allocation (I have the numbers, my loves).
Ranking announcement from the end of ep 6
Ok, here’s the ranking announcement from the end of episode 6. At this point, ep 8 is probably out, so this is out of date, but it’s still kind of interesting.
What I did is, I put the votes in my spreadsheet and found the average number of votes per trainee, which turned out to be 818,005. Then I had the spreadsheet calculate what percent of the average vote each person’s vote was. I think that helps put the number of votes in perspective. For example, international sweetheart Sung Hanbin’s 3.3 million votes represented 404% of the average (in other words, more than four times the average!). Meanwhile, poor Feel Special member Lee Donggun’s 81,739 votes represents about 10% of the average. Ouch.
What’s kind of interesting is that the top 15 were all 123% or more of the average or higher, while from 16 to 51, they were all 89% or lower of the average. It’s really a kind of haves and have-nots situation here.
People who were on a team that got the 100,000 benefit will be marked in blue. People who also got the 150,000 personal benefit will be marked in purple. Members of Zoom are marked in green (because I think they should have won.)
Sung Han Bin 3,307,923 404%
Han Yujin 2,909,883 356%
Seok Matthew 2,825,146 345%
Zhang Hao 2,673,322 327%
Kim JiWoong 2,529,910 309%
Kim Gyuvin 2,283,675 279%
Kim TaeRae 2,172,772 265%
Keita 1,881,172 230%
Jay 1,376,663 168%
Hui 1,338,595 163%
Park Gunwook 1,327,449 162%
Kum Jun Hyeon 1,315,229 160%
Park Hanbin 1,138,119 139%
Ricky 1,131,856 138%
Haruto 1,002,517 123%
Yoon Jong Woo 728,860 89%
Wang Zi Hao 654,985 80%
Zhang Shuai Bo 645,683 79%
Yoo Seung Eon 627,720 77%
Seo Won 609,101 74%
Takuto 573,842 70.15%
Na Kamden 573,627 70.13%
Chen Kuan Jui 570,537 69.75%
Lee Seung Hwan 550,610 67%
Cai Jin Xin 453,496 55%
Ollie 439,284 54%
Hiroto 425,135 52%
Ma Jing Xiang 397,838 49%
Lee Jeong Hyeon 382,238 46%
Mun Jung Hyun 366,626 45%
Anthonny 309,114 38%
Jung Mingyu 290,220 35%
Brian 285,579 34%
Cha Woongki 282,786 34%
Chen Jian Yu 266,785 33%
Lim Jun Seo 265,140 32.4%
Dang Hong Hai 257,333 31.5%
Lee Yedam 248,293 20%
Park JiHoo 238,539 29%
Cong 238,039 29%
Ji Yun Seo 230,839 28%
Wumuti 219,507 27%
Bak Doha 204,607 25%
Oh Sungmin 198,846 24.3%
Krystian 196,543 24%
Lee Da Eul 177,458 21.7%
Lee Dong Yeol 172,206 21%
Park Hyun Been 123,848 15%
Jeong IChan 113,935 14%
Choi Woojin 103,062 12.6%
Lee Donggun 81,739 10%
The Performances, the votes, and the rankings
In the last ten minutes or so of episode 7, they gather the trainees together in what might be the space where the audience usually stands, and torture them for a bit before finally revealing how many votes each team got. The winner within each category gets to perform on MNET countdown, each member gets 100,000 extra points, and the number one ranked team member on that team gets an extra 150,000 extra points.
Below, I list the songs, the audience votes they received, and the total screen time (adding up the episode 6 segment and the longer segment in episode 6 or 7). I list them in order of audience vote.
Vocal and Rap
Tomboy 860 votes, 27 minutes of screentime
Man in love 752 votes, 14.5 minutes of screentime
Limousine 719 votes, 13.5 minutes of screentime
Not Spring… 617 votes, 15 minutes of screentime
Winner: Tomboy; Zhang Hao gets the extra benefit
My thoughts:
My favorite is easily Limousine. I just loved this performance. Man in Love and Not Spring were about tied for me; each had one singer I quite enjoy and a few singers I don’t enjoy as much, and neither was a song that I exactly want to listen to over and over. I guess Tomboy actually came in last for me -- I would rather listen to any of the other three again than listen to Tomboy again. If I’m watching the performances, then I’d rather watch Limousine the most -- the performance is so emotional and so good -- but after, that I’d obviously choose to watch Man in Love to see TaeRae’s weird elf face that I like so much. So, putting all that together, my rank is:
Limousine
Man in Love
Not Spring…
Tomboy
Vocal and Dance
Love Killa 840 votes, 20.5 minutes minutes of screentime
Home 716 votes, 19 minutes of screentime
Feel Special 677 votes, 19 minutes of screentime
Butterfly 664 votes, 19 minutes of screentime
Winner: Love Killa; Kim Gyuvin gets the extra votes
My thoughts:
None of these performances exactly floated my boat. Love Killa was marred by sort of blank performances, in my opinion (though it’s cool with me if you liked it, hope I’m not yucking your yum). Home was lovely at times but marred by tight, strained vocals here and there. Feel Special was a mess, brightened by Woongki's cuteness and, honestly, Z-bo's cheerful performance (I'm not his biggest fan, but it's not like the audience vote came out of completely nowhere). And Butterfly just sort of fell apart, as beautiful as Chen Kuan Jui's dancing was. I don’t really want to watch any of these performances again, or listen to them either.
I tried thinking, ok, which one would I want to watch a fancam of? For example, if it was a fancam of Gyuvin from Love Killa vs. a fancam of Woongki from Feel Special vs. a fancam of Chen Kuan Jui from Butterfly vs. a fancam of Yoon Jong Woo from Home, which would I prefer? And I found myself just ranking them based on how much I like the song itself. So my ranking is meaningless. They're all tied for 2nd place. No one is in first. First place is held in reserve for how good Love Killa would have been if Yoon Jong Woo and/or Ricky had been in the group instead of Matthew and/or Seo Won. (Sorry! I love Seo Won and want to get fro-yo with him, but the song didn't really suit him.)
Rap and Dance
Law 846 votes, 19 minutes of screentime
Zoom 813 votes, 14 minutes of screentime
Gang 798 votes, 12 minutes of screentime
Rush Hour 742 votes, 20.5 minutes of screentime
Winner: Law; Park Hanbin gets the extra votes
My thoughts:
This one is easy. Zoom. Zoom is my winner, hands down.
I can see why Law won. It was exciting and sexy and the boys looked good. I like all five of these trainees a lot and think they're great performers. But here’s the thing about Law -- it’s so fucking good the first few times you watch it, but then it gets kind of dull. It’s just all kind of monotonous dancing, you know? Yeah, there’s the stupid flag wave, but there’s nothing else to break it up.
In contrast, I keep noticing more cool things about Zoom as I watch it over and over. Like, the detail of how, when Wumuti does that kind of lifted leg butt wiggle on the line, “Wumumutiti!,” the other trainees do a far scaled down version of the move, so that they’re supporting him but your eye still stays on Wumuti. It’s so subtle, but it’s cool because it controls where your focus is. I like being led around visually as I watch a dance -- tell me where I should look, choreography! Also, and I’m aware that this isn’t a unique take, but I love the way that the end of each rap section connects to the beginning of the next one. It makes it all feel like this is a real team, not just trainees who got stuck with each other. And I get so excited when I hear Wumuti’s awesome screech “Lights Camera Action baby!” and I know it’s Haruto’s dance break. YES!!!! Haruto, hit that breakdance pose and hold it for the camera click sound! It’s also so fun to watch Haruto’s fan cam and see him cheerfully clowning around with the other trainees when they were on the sidelines, during the performance. Ollie's cute rap, Hyunbeen saying "braggadocious," it's all so charming. They’re just all having so much fun. They’re IN the performance.
For the record, I assume it was Keita behind most of what’s good here. From what I’ve heard, he did basically everything for this song, and did a lot in previous challenges, too. Keita’s so good that even MNET’s editing can’t hide him. The judges won’t shut up about him and every single other trainee respects him. I’m so glad that the audience sees it too.
So, Law won over Zoom in part (in my opinion) because Law was sexier -- I have a whole other post about how I think that Zoom’s styling really brought them down. But it may also have been the scheduling. I saw someone talking (in the comments section of The Bias List) about how she was in the audience for the taping of these performances! Jealous. According to her, it took ages and ages, with lots of time in between performances. She says Zoom was the last performance and by then, it was midnight and the audience was exhausted by then. But the team started performing and it was so energetic and fun that everyone in the audience jumped into life again. This is all according to a person on the internet, I can’t substantiate it, but I don’t know, it kind of rings true.
It would be like MNET to try to sabotage Keita. Production had to know how good Zoom was and that it was likely to win, which would give 100,000 points to Ollie, Wumuti, Haruto, and Park Hyunbeen, and almost certainly would mean 250,000 points for Keita. If you look at the vote list above, you can see how much 100,000 points would mean for most members on this team. Yes this is just an interim vote and the final tally would be bigger overall, but even so, 100,000 points would help lock Haruto into safe territory, it would probably ensure Ollie's survival, and it would give Wumuti and Hyunbeen a fighting chance. 250,000 more votes might also move Keita up one space in the top 9. Scheduling Zoom last meant that it was an exhausted, cranky crowd who were voting, and that probably hurt it.
Anyway, enough about Zoom and Law. What about the other two groups?
As for Ggang, I think it was never going to appeal to me much because the song itself isn’t really my style. It’s not the trainees’ fault at all -- they did a decent job. But nothing about this performance specifically grabbed my attention to where I’d want to watch it over and over, and my little cousin Kum Jun Hyeon's shirt lift joke didn’t strike my fancy.
And of course, Rush Hour just drags my spirit down when I try to watch it. I don’t know if I’d feel differently if I didn’t know the back story, but I do know the backstory, and I can’t turn that part of my brain off.
So in the end, I guess my rank is:
Zoom
Zoom
Zoom
The other teams
Oh, and here’s my pie chart of the number of minutes devoted to each team. It’s kind of wild to see how little time was devoted to Zoom compared to Tomboy, isn’t it?
As for the new songs that they’re going to be performing for the “Artist Battle”...
Oriental Pop “Switch” - sounds like a lost NCT Dream song
Sentimental Hip Hop “SuperCharger” - fast paced, kind of like Law
R&B Pop “Over Me” is sexy and charismatic
New-tro synth pop “Say My Name” is cute and lighthearted
Funk Pop “En garde” is sort of weirdly forgettable.
Based on my theory on how important sexiness is, I think most of them will want #3, whether it suits them or not. Dancer types like Wang Zi Hao will probably want #2, and cutie pies like Woongki will probably want #4. It’ll be fun to see who ends up in which group, and whether it was the song they wanted or not. I’ll especially be interested in where the fans put Matthew, because he keeps trying to do sexy concepts and I think he’d be much better suited for something more like #4.
Ok! We're finally done! And episode 8 is out. In fact, it's been out for a week if you knew where to look, and I did know where to look, but I have held back and didn't spoil myself.
Hope you're having a lovely day, hope that good things happen to you, and hope that all your pants are real sparkly. See you in the next one!
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If you haven’t gotten the Shawscope Vol. 1, 12-film, 8-Disc box set from Arrow Video, it is a must have! It’s incredible.
Get it on Amazon!
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Tiot masterlist
Reactions
With other bp contestants
Waking them up with kisses ft. Jay, Zhang Hao, Kum Junhyeong,Chen Kuan Jui, Matthew
OT4
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Headcanons
OT9
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Kim Minseoung
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Hong Keonhee
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Kum Junhyeon
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Choi Woojin
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Drabbles
Kim Minseoung
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Hong Keonhee
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Kum Junhyeon
Why so quiet?
Memories
Choi Woojin
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°◇°♡°♤°♧°◇°♡°♤°♧°◇°♡°♤°♧°◇°♡°♤°♧°
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✧ BOYS PLANET ✧
타임어택 1분 자기소개 ✧ Time Attack, 1 Min. PR
✧ K Group
Bak Do Ha : https://youtu.be/Bdm8bVWnYQg
Cha Woong Ki : https://youtu.be/I0oF3feyb4c
Choi Ji Ho : https://youtu.be/34W9BZ3ICcU
Choi Seung Hun : https://youtu.be/_eS1B-tSz-U
Choi Woo Jin : https://youtu.be/gNsA8SG7KCY
Han Seo Bin : https://youtu.be/-XFaIaj7Gxg
Han Yu Jin : https://youtu.be/yD-1-04n5yE
Han Yu Seop : https://youtu.be/xyY19-48mTo
Hong Keon Hee : https://youtu.be/RwQujHVRQO0
Jang Ji Ho : https://youtu.be/5tWf_9wEm2I
Jang Min Seo : https://youtu.be/LjVqpdL6-f4
Jang Yeo Jun : https://youtu.be/BcC3LL3HuTo
Jeon Ho Young : https://youtu.be/Pl5tIoHjj74
Jeon Woo Seok : https://youtu.be/T8GY0h0IOfU
Jeong I Chan : https://youtu.be/zoV37PdCaPk
Ji Yun Seo : https://youtu.be/iFVxRna3LKs
Jung Ho Jin : https://youtu.be/kSb6vgDqGPw
Jung Hwan Rok : https://youtu.be/ej6kiundfJc
Jung Min Gyu : https://youtu.be/-bwwMJ8vV9o
Jung Seyun : https://youtu.be/DB0MuZkkVVk
Kim Gyu Vin : https://youtu.be/xnw0sbiiyjg
Kim Ji Woong : https://youtu.be/pOP5k5JTD1c
Kim Min Hyuk : https://youtu.be/FRMfQi3Qvaw
Kim Min Seoung : https://youtu.be/xBRWY7UJzo4
Kim Tae Rae : https://youtu.be/D2sTOzPZ7gk
Kum Jun Hyeon : https://youtu.be/MVU5SDvjUkw
Lee Da Eul : https://youtu.be/ua2OeaQ14CE
Lee Dong Gun : https://youtu.be/LH_cvLtfuys
Lee Dong Yeol : https://youtu.be/zQy270g60LI
Lee Hoe Taek : https://youtu.be/BwxcboDCGxg
Lee Hwan Hee : https://youtu.be/nvk60sSGZiY
Lee Jeong Hyeon : https://youtu.be/bRlBhjGaZto
Lee Seung Hwan : https://youtu.be/ptsz-M1v1S0
Lee Ye Dam : https://youtu.be/hJSX8ZYUa14
Lim Jun Seo : https://youtu.be/0Iy-T0e2QIc
Mun Jung Hyun : https://youtu.be/lujLHn0dqiQ
Oh Sung Min : https://youtu.be/7YqqvKoyDoA
Park Gun Wook : https://youtu.be/tElDOgg1K-Y
Park Gwan Young : https://youtu.be/2IjpvV28vzM
Park Han Bin : https://youtu.be/qaCCMuM_JcI
Park Hyun Been : https://youtu.be/vA_9Fc9XX4A
Park Ji Hoo : https://youtu.be/vA_9Fc9XX4A
Park Min Seok : https://youtu.be/YBabjIH3iIE
Seo Won : https://youtu.be/l9qG5qp6Pi0
Sung Han Bin : https://youtu.be/suD2NfKRq3U
Yoo Seung Eon : https://youtu.be/tjO6v6XOYag
Yoon Jong Woo : https://youtu.be/pEAfs0m_ujE
✧ G Group
Anthonny : https://youtu.be/EcgeMI68oT0
Brian : https://youtu.be/sE3pw4scU0Q
Cai Jin Xin : https://youtu.be/sjHuJT6rZ-c
Chen Jian Yu : https://youtu.be/LAJHqARlasw
Chen Kuan Jui : https://youtu.be/EtCp9rUEqho
Chen Liang : https://youtu.be/vXwYCApgqcU
Chen Ren You : https://youtu.be/-PeKmKiZgFI
Chen Yu Geng : https://youtu.be/8F8Wg45RdiI
Cong : https://youtu.be/0ljIEXXa-NY
Dang Hong Hai : https://youtu.be/qgbIozwsp6s
Dong Dong : https://youtu.be/XSTsYc935-A
Feng Jun Lan : https://youtu.be/u7RjAM94N_w
Haru : https://youtu.be/uUAuI4m09-Y
Haruto : https://youtu.be/u_lc8HBM7lE
Hiroto : https://youtu.be/Wb0Q17Qq2MI
Hyo : https://youtu.be/lI_CF7RXhU0
Ichika : https://youtu.be/k5EkcmFEY7Q
Itsuki : https://youtu.be/kyEWK_t36No
Jay : https://youtu.be/iLibl6cbHbg
Kei : https://youtu.be/RVu6zlu5vjw
Keita : https://youtu.be/kSHT009TsFc
Krystian : https://youtu.be/03vCmVhf_E8
Lin Shi Yuan : https://youtu.be/fPtzEFb1gek
Ma Jing Xiang : https://youtu.be/wKwL12Oigks
Min : https://youtu.be/kqa0S2qfMiY
Na Kamden : https://youtu.be/InYMLYuN34g
Nice : https://youtu.be/TckeqHI5vKA
Ollie : https://youtu.be/lcXxF-U5Nqo
Osuke : https://youtu.be/2I-w1yoYnzs
Ouju : https://youtu.be/QsSfSZ8A18U
Qiu Sheng Yang : https://youtu.be/Y0PdpGbQivU
Ricky : https://youtu.be/a9fMfGigkPE
Riku : https://youtu.be/tpEuVhf-jLo
Seok Matthew : https://youtu.be/kF1NKaN3Z4s
Takuto : https://youtu.be/KdI9wZ_teW0
Toui : https://youtu.be/-4Cw-WDU-bI
Wang Yan Hong : https://youtu.be/o9RYNdHyqGU
Wang Zi Hao : https://youtu.be/KDQgcMZESXE
Wen Ye Chen : https://youtu.be/B6ec66Xa9bA
Winnie : https://youtu.be/PqNcGa0l5qU
Wumuti : https://youtu.be/q3vf-q7tP2w
Xuan Hao : https://youtu.be/_8Kjw-M5V8Y
Yang Jun : https://youtu.be/Vqiv8N0cens
Yuki : https://youtu.be/HFy1sbCtlUQ
Yutaka : https://youtu.be/dIJi6cNlbTI
Yuto : https://youtu.be/XGE7wqXTzr8
Zhang Hao : https://youtu.be/e4Y22OQbMU4
Zhang Shuai Bo : https://youtu.be/6XzEnGZB9n8
Let’s Shine! ✧
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Ji ji fu ji ji
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