“I didn't fall in love with you. I walked into love with you, with my eyes wide open, choosing to take every step along the way.”
// Kiersten White, The Chaos of Stars
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If I had a dollar for every horror book I read this year (that was also published this year) in which a conservative cult used powers beyond mortal ken to enforce their conservative agenda onto a bunch of queer and neurodivergent children who then turned that power around to decimate the cult at some point in their lives, I would have two dollars, which isn't a lot but it's great that it happened twice.
Anyway, read Camp Damascus by Chuck Tingle and Mister Magic by Kiersten White.
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"I didn't fall in love with you. I walked into love with you, with my eyes wide open, choosing to take every step along the way. I do believe in fate and destiny, but I also believe we are only fated to do the things that we'd choose anyway. And I'd choose you; in a hundred lifetimes, in a hundred worlds, in any version of reality, I'd find you and I'd choose you"
I just want someone to grab my little face and scream "ON PURPOSE, ON PURPOSE I AM GOING TO CARE ABOUT YOU"
Chidi Anagonye : Can I ask you a question? Soulmates aren't... real, are they?
Michael : Chidi, in all honesty, I don't know. But I don't think so.
...
Michael : If soulmates do exist, they're not found, they're made. People meet, they get a good feeling, and then they get to work building a relationship.
Anne Carson, Euripides || Dulce María Loynaz, from “Poem XCI,” trans. James O’Connor, Absolute Solitude: Selected Prose Poems (First Archipelago, 2016) || Kiersten White, The Chaos of Stars || Russian Doll, Season 2 || Jenny Slate || Dead Poets Society || The Good Place || Death with Interruptions, José Saramago || Russian Doll, Season 1
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Another year, another absurd amount of books read (296, because if I wasn't reading or writing this year, my brain was on fire). I was asked again for my top books of the year, so here we go: 2023's top 10, in no particular order.
This was the first book I read of the year--literally, vacated the hangout with my wife and sibling-in-laws to sit on their couch upstairs and eat through it. Do you love The Fall of the House of Usher, but wish for a nonbinary protagonist and a lot more mushrooms? This is the book for you! (T. Kingfisher is fucking rad, I made a concerted effort to only list ONE of her books on here, but honorable mention goes to The Twisted Ones for fucking me upppp.)
A gay, post-apocolyptic Pinocchio retelling involving copious robots, found family elements, and a cool-ass treehouse. Klune always hits for me with his unrepentant queer family dynamics and sense of humor. Honorable mention to the first two in the Green Creek series (although that's got a lot more...adult elements in among the werewolves, you've been warned).
I thiiiink I found this through The Homo Schedule podcast (PSA: if you missed out on Jasmin Savoy Brown and Liv Hewson doing a podcast together, now you know better), and it wrecked my shit. Tons of trigger warnings, as this is a memoir about abuse within a queer relationship, but it's so beautifully written. I personally suggest listening to the audiobook first, then standing anxiously behind someone at a book warehouse sale, hoping they'll set down the only paperback copy so you can swipe it.
A fantastical-historical reimagining in which the KKK is filled with literal monsters, and Black women are resistance fighters armed to take them out. Visceral and intense, and truly an excellent horror story.
Just. Such a soft time travel story about a daughter and her father and cherishing the time you get with loved ones. I was thoroughly unprepared for how lovely I found this one. It's very kind.
Spooky house, take-no-shit redhead, protective sibling elements, bisexual recluse with a sword who really just needs a nap. I haven't found a Harrow book yet I haven't slapped five stars on. She's so good at character and atmosphere, and I'm always surprised at how fast her stories race by.
The whole Daevabad trilogy (of which this is the first book) is just magical. A girl from the mortal world finds herself embroiled with the centuries-long prejudices and wars of djinn in a fantastical city. It's one of the rare stories of its kind that does have a love triangle, but doesn't feel like a love triangle; it's far less interested in the insufferable "who gets picked" than it is in the actual horrors these people are both perpetrating and coping with. It's an intoxicating ride.
Fuck You, TERFS: the book. Given that fact, there's obviously quite a lot of transphobia to deal with, but it's very clear that those people are wrong, and it's a super-engaging (and super-oh-god-what-comes-next) witchy time populated with queer, protective, interesting characters I'm excited to see again in the follow-up.
Have you ever wanted a haunted house story with visceral imagery and a rather lovely twist? Gailey has you covered. As much as I enjoyed The Echo Wife, I think I actually loved this one more, and it makes me so excited to see what else they've got up their sleeve.
One of my final reads for the year, when I was just churning through hardcovers at the speed of sound. I love this book. I recognize it won't be for everyone, but it takes so much of what I love about IT (one of my all-time favorite books, despite its flaws) and twists it through the lens of an author who escaped the Mormon church. It's horrific, it's fantastically abstract in places, it explores childhood and memory, imagination and abuse, and almost every character is queer. It's a great "I simply cannot sleep until I've finished" read.
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If I become the buyer of the bookstore I work for (not an outrageous goal), one thing I'm going to do is set up a display of Books We Hate and What to Read Instead.
This idea brought to you by the absolutely loathsome Final Girl Support Group (Grady Hendrix), which you should skip and instead read Hide by Kiersten White.
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“I didn't fall in love with you. I walked into love with you, with my eyes wide open, choosing to take every step along the way. I do believe in fate and destiny, but I also believe we are only fated to do the things that we'd choose anyway. And I'd choose you; in a hundred lifetimes, in a hundred worlds, in any version of reality, I'd find you and I'd choose you”
~ Kiersten White, The Chaos of Stars
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