#Javier Peña x Plus Size Female Reader

[tightjeansjavi]

𝙄’𝙙 𝙡𝙤𝙫𝙚 𝙩𝙤 𝙨𝙚𝙚 𝙢𝙚 𝙛𝙧𝙤𝙢 𝙮𝙤𝙪𝙧 𝙥𝙤𝙞𝙣𝙩 𝙤𝙛 𝙫𝙞𝙚𝙬

(Javi Peña x plus sized f!reader)

A/N: this by far has been the most intimidating piece I have ever written. I received this request awhile back and I wanted to make sure I throughly thought it through before writing. I have to thank my besties, @chaotic-mystery and @peterhollandkait for helping me along the way. Every body type deserves to be loved and appreciated, and I hope this sheds some positive light on all my plus sized babes out there. Thank you for entrusting me with writing this. ♡

~Word count: 3.7k~

Summary: A night out dancing with your friends in Colombia leads you to meet the man of your dreams, Javi Peña. He is the one man in your life who truly loves and appreciates all of you.

Warnings: established relationship, body positivity, brief societal bullshit in the beginning, Javi is a passionate lover, reader is plus sized, smut, oral (female receiving) face sitting, pussy eating, cum eating, huge fucking praise kink, teasing, banter, fluff mixed in between, swearing, NSFW, (+18) minors dni!

Songs used:

“pov” by Ariana Grande

“TiO” by Zayn

“PILLOWTALK” by Zayn

“Tuyo” by Rodrigo Amarante

Your boyfriend Javi never failed to make you feel like you were the most beautiful woman in the room. It didn’t matter where the two of you were, he didn’t hesitate to show the world that you were all his. He worshipped the ground you walked on. Your past lovers never loved you the way that Javi actively would. The ex men in your life never truly appreciated you for who you were. It was always superficial, and focused around your body. You realized at a young age that society valued women for their looks, and not what was on the inside. You didn’t fit in the category of the ‘ideal’ body type. You weren’t a stick thin model. You weren’t short and petite. You were boxed into a category that society deemed as ‘ugly.’ You were taught that all bodies were beautiful and women were more than just their skin. If only the men in your life would understand, and see things from your point of view. That was, until you met Javi Peña.

You have been dating Javi for a little over a year now. You met the DEA agent while you were out dancing with your friends one hot summer evening in Colombia. He was captivated by you, and the way your body moved. He was practically begging to take you home. You told him that he’d have to properly treat you first and for once, you didn’t see a man hesitate to take you out for a good meal. Javi knew all the best late night food joints in Bogotá, and for the rest of the late night, you enjoyed tapas together. Drinking, laughing, enjoying one’s company. He was adamant on making sure you made it home safely. You couldn’t help but invite him in for a nightcap, and next thing you knew, he had you pressed against the back of your door, hands roaming your body like a man starved. He stole the air from your lungs as he kissed you. Your mind was dizzy, captivated with this man who made you weak in the knees. Javi didn’t pressure you of course, and everything was taken at your own pace. You did end up having that nightcap together after a passionate makeout.

A year later, and your life is fully enveloped around agent Peña. You have a shared apartment now and the sparks continue to fly.

It’s Sunday morning, and you’ve always been an early riser. Your boyfriend? Well..he’s the complete opposite. You’re always understanding of course. You know just how much his job takes a toll on him. Mornings like these are your favorite because it’s just you in the kitchen, radio humming in the back as you cook you and your lover breakfast. You’re wearing one of his many shirts. This one is particularly your favorite simply for the fact that it’s an ‘unconventional’ color for a man to wear. The shirt is pink and you swear your boyfriend sprayed extra cologne on the cotton fabric just because he knows how much you love it.

You don’t even hear your lover's presence in the kitchen as you’re completely in your own world. Your hips sensually sway to the beat of the song playing through the radio as you hum along.

Javi loves the way that his shirts never cover your butt completely. He loves the way the fabric hugs your hips and thighs. He loves the way he can grip onto your hips and pull you against his chest. He loves the way that when you straddle him, your thighs take up the entire expanse of his. What society views as ugly, he views as beauty. You’re beautiful, sexy, in every way imaginable to him. Here in his kitchen, dressed in his shirt, sunlight peeking in through the stained glass windows. If only fools fall in love, then Javi was the president of the club.

You felt his presence behind you, his arms snaking around your waist and pulling your back flush against his chest. Your boyfriend is wearing nothing but tight black boxer briefs when you feel his lips press a soft kiss to the side of your neck, his mustache tickles your skin as you let out a soft giggle. “Buenos días hermosa. ¿Cómo durmió mi niña?”(good morning beautiful. How did my girl sleep?) He hummed against your skin, giving your hips a firm, loving squeeze as he continued to pepper kisses down the expanse of your neck.

Your eyes fluttered shut as you reached your hand back and threaded your fingers through his soft bead head, giving his hair a soft tug. “Buenos días mi amor, dormí bien. ¿Y tú?”(good morning my love, I slept good. How about you?) Your lover had taught you a thing or two about speaking Spanish. It was one of the many things that you and Javi did together, and It never failed to surprise him, and melt his heart when you would actively speak his native tongue.

“Getting better, cariño. That’s my girl.” He lifted his chin up slightly so he could steal a quick kiss, or two before he gently flipped you around so you were facing him. Your arms draped around his neck as he pressed you into the cool countertop. His shirt rode higher up your thighs from the movement, revealing more of your delicious skin to his adoration filled eyes. “Whatever you’re cooking there smells delicious, querida but my appetites are specific this morning. Can I eat you instead?” He wiggled his eyebrows suggestively as he grasped onto the back of your thighs, hoisting you up onto the edge of the counter top.

“Only for you, Jav.” You giggled as he lifted you up onto the counter top. Your thighs jiggled from the movement as they covered the expanse of the counter top. You wrapped them around his waist, yanking him towards you with a playful gleam in your eyes. Your boyfriend's vulgarity never surprised you and you knew how to match his energy beautifully. “You’ll spoil your breakfast if you eat me baby.”

“Don’t care. You’re looking too damn delicious for me not to. You know what you do to me when you’re wearing one of my shirts? Jesus fucking Christ woman, you know how to drive a man absolutely up a fucking wall.” He let out a low growl as he was already diving in for another kiss. “You look so fucking sexy in my shirt it’s unreal baby. Un-fucking-real how lucky I am. Luckiest fucking man alive.” He mumbled into your lips, swiping his sinful tongue across your plump lower lip before he took it between his teeth.

Finishing up preparing breakfast was no longer on your mind as your lover kissed you like a man starved. You wasted no time to pull him down on top of you, kissing him back with the same amount of passion that he exuded. A moan slipped past your lips when his teeth sunk into your skin. He had your head spinning already. “You want to devour me right here, right now?”

He tugged your lower lip out with his teeth before he released it. “I’ll get down on my knees for you right now cariño. You don’t even have to ask.” He purred as he pressed kisses all over your face now, playfully nibbling on your soft cheeks and cute nose. “I’ll eat your pussy here first, and then move you to the bed where you can sit on my face, and suffocate me with those gorgeous thighs. How’s that sound to you hermosa?”

You scrunched your nose up when his teeth playfully nibbled on it. How could your man be so sweet, and yet so filthy at the same goddamn time? “Get on your knees for me, Agent Peña.” Your voice dipped down an octave. Tone sultry, yet playful.

“Yes ma’am.” He chuckled as he stole one more kiss from your pretty lips. His tongue enveloped around yours, drinking in your soft breaths with your teeth clashing in a heated kiss. His skilled fingers were already moving up his shirt that you were wearing. The buttons were nearly about to burst open and your breasts pushed against the tight fabric was enough for him to rip the shirt open ferociously. The buttons clattered to the floor as you let out a gasp, swatting at his chest.

“JAV! Your shirt! You’ve gone and—oh fuck.” Your words were cut off when his mouth wrapped around your peeked nipple, his lashes fluttering up to your gaze as his teeth nipped at the sensitive skin before sucking harshly. His hand that wasn’t gripped on your thigh was now wrapped around the expanse of your breast. He kneaded the plush skin with his fingers, tugging on your nipple with his thumb and forefinger. He provided the same amount of lustrous attention to both of your breasts. His breath was heavy as he nipped and licked at every inch of your skin that he could get to. His movements were ravenous as you watched him sink to his knees below you.

“It’s just a shirt, cariño. I have plenty of them.” You felt him grin into the warm expanse of your inner thigh. Javi was a biter, and he prided himself on it. His lips and teeth were biting and kissing your plush skin. He was a fucking tease too as he ghosted his lips across where you craved him most. Your hand found purchase in his hair, threading your fingers through the soft strands as you tugged on them, fingers scraping his scalp. “Don’t you dare make me beg you right now Javi. Don’t you dare.”

“Paciencia cariño. Let me take my sweet sweet time with you and your pretty pussy. Don’t rush my work.” He tsked as he nipped at your inner thigh once more.

You opened your mouth to protest until you felt his tongue flatten against your covered clit. His broad nose pressed against your pubic bone as he tasted you through the fabric of your thin panties. His tongue dragged across your slick folds before gliding back up to your clit. He sucked on the bundle of nerves through the fabric, creating tingling friction from his hot tongue and the fabric rubbing against you.

“Fuck me. I need to feel you completely, baby. Please, Jav. Please don’t tease me.”

Javi used the broad expanse of his shoulders to keep your thighs propped open for him. He continued to lap at your covered pussy while looking up at you. His brow rose sinfully and you could see just how dark his pupils had grown. The sight of him buried between your plush thighs was enough to have your eyes roll back into your skull. “Look at me.” He mumbled against you. “Look at me with those beautiful eyes, hermosa. Look at me while I eat your pussy. Keep them on me.”

You let out a shaky breath as your eyes fluttered open and locked on his. There was never a hotter sight than your boyfriend beneath you.

“Good girl.” He hummed while he hooked his thumb around the thin fabric and pulled it to the side. He wasted no time burying his face into you, sucking in a lungful of air because he wasn’t going to take any breaths till he had you cumming along his tongue. His nose bumped against your clit as he lapped at your slick folds. He loosened his jaw up as he sucked your clit into his mouth and used the tip of his tongue to flick against it. The sounds he made while he ate your pussy were nothing short of filthy. He loved the taste of you on his tongue. Your natural sweet saltiness drove him mad. He wasn’t shy of admitting that he loved eating you out. He’d have his face buried between your thighs everyday if you’d let him.

“F—fuck Javi. Baby—your tongue it’s so—yes, yes right there. Oh fuck. Please don’t stop.” You mewled above him, scraping your nails against his scalp as you elicited a low groan from his chest.

“Taste so fucking sweet baby. All for me. Let me hear those pretty sounds. Your pussy sounds so pretty. You hear how wet she is for me?” He hummed with a mouthful of your cunt.

You let out a slew of profanities mixed in with his name as he continued to lap at you. He switched from slow, long licks to rapid ones as he shook his head back and forth against you. Each time his nose would bump into your clit, you’d jolt forward from the sudden contact.

You could feel him grinning against you as he dropped his tongue down your slick folds, gathering up your arousal before he slipped his tongue into your tight hole, fucking you with it at an agonizing slow pace.

You struggled to keep your eyes locked on him when all you could see was the bridge of his nose. His face was completely buried against you and he loved every second of it. It took him no time to coax your first orgasm of the morning. You ground your hips into his face as you chanted his name out like it was your personal prayer.

His mouth became more ravenous against you when he could tell your orgasm was quickly approaching. He felt your thighs quiver and shake against his head as he licked up every last drop. When the rest of his face was revealed to you finally, his chin, mustache and lips were coated in your slick. He was glistening in your juices while he rested his cheek against your plush thigh, smirking up at you. “How was that for good eating?” He teased.

“You eat pussy like a man starved, Jav.” You dropped your hand down to his face, dragging your thumb across his slick covered lips. He nibbled lightly on the tip of your thumbnail.

“It’s the only way a man should be eating pussy baby. If he’s not, he’s definitely not doing it right. I fucking love it. I’d have my face buried between your thighs every damn day if you’d let me.”

“Well, maybe those ‘men’ should learn a thing or two from you.” You giggled.

He released your thumb from his lips as he turned his head to playfully nip at your thigh once more before he kissed his way up your body, skating his lips across your navel and up between the valley of your breasts. He finally reached your lips, kissing you languidly as you got a taste of yourself on his tongue.

“You need a minute or two to recover cariño? We do have all morning so there’s no rush.”

“You just want me to sit on your face Jav. It’s okay, you can admit it.” You mumbled against his lips. Your thighs were still trembling as you hooked them around his waist pulling him in closer to you.

“Yeah, I want you to suffocate me with your thighs.” He casually stated as his hands found purchase around your outer thighs. “I want my face to be so deep in your pussy that I can’t breathe. You think you can do that for me sweet girl?” His lips detached from yours as he rested his forehead against you, teasingly brushing his upper lip across your lower.

“Is this your way of proposing? Because if so, yes.” You giggled, bringing your hands up to his face as you brushed your fingers across his firm jawline.

“Fuck. I am unprepared for this querida. Let me make it up to you, okay? My apologies hermosa. I should have a ring on deck for situations like this.” He had a tiny grin on his lips that you kissed earnestly.

You let out a faux sigh of disappointment. “That’s okay baby, I know it’ll happen someday.”

“te prometo que lo hará mi amor.” (I promise you it will my love)

Your response was to kiss him, pulling him as close as you physically could as your lips slotted with his. He kissed you like no man ever had. He kissed you with urgency, sincerity and passion. Soon enough, your boyfriend was helping you off the counter on wobbly legs. He was there to keep you steady as you made your way into the bedroom.

You had taken the reins then as you pushed him onto his back, watching as he fell back against the mattress with a smug look on his face. He scooted himself back against the headboard and tapped his chest for you to come take your seat. Once you were close enough, his hands were grabbing you, pulling you onto the expanse of his chest as your thighs settled around him. Your panties were quickly discarded down your ankles and to the floor as he brushed his thumb across your clit languidly. “Don’t be afraid to squeeze me a little, okay cariño? In fact, I’d absolutely love it if you did.” He looked up at you with a grin.

“One skull crusher coming right up, baby.” You giggled as he let out a deep chuckle. The playful edge was gone when he grasped your thighs between his fingers and pulled you down directly onto his face.

His tongue dragged against you once before his teeth were nipping at your meaty inner thighs. His hands slipped around your thighs, settling along your ass as he squeezed and kneaded the plump flesh, driving you further into him.

From the angle you were at, you could barely see his face as his tongue found its way to your clit once more. Your thighs were fully wrapped around his head now as he groaned against you. Tongue lapping away as he brought one of his hands down on your ass, feeling the skin jiggle from the contact before he was gripping it tightly again.

You could only see his eyes, which were blissfully closed as he swirled his tongue around your clit, sucking into his mouth. When he felt your gaze land on him, his eyes snapped open, locking on yours intensely. There was something so erotic watching your man devour you from this angle. To see him enveloped by your pussy and thighs was the hottest thing you had ever seen.

He continued to work your clit against his tongue. He was getting especially sloppy with his mouth when you started to ride his face. He could barely breathe with you clenching in around his head but he fucking loved every second of it.

Your moans were muffled and fuzzy sounding to him as he completely zoned in on making you cum again. He surely was pussy drunk at this point by the way he furiously lapped at you. Did his jaw ever feel sore after? You weren’t even sure at this point.

“C’mon baby. I know you got one more in you sweet girl. Wanna feel you cum on my tongue hermosa. Give me another taste, please.” His filth was muffled by your thighs, but his voice vibrated deliciously against your core as your hips continued to buck into his face. Your hips continually rolled into his tongue as your head dropped between your shoulders.

“Baby—oh fuck. Keep doing that. Whatever you’re doing keep fucking doing it. Don’t stop!” You moaned above him, grinding your hips faster as you chased your impending orgasm.

“Good girl. That’s my good fucking girl. Get off on my face you pretty filthy thing.” He growled against you, digging his fingers into the thick purchase of your ass as he drove you forward.

“Oh fuck. Oh fuck. Javi I can’t—” your hands dropped to your thighs as they began to tremble around his head.

“Yes. Yes you can hermosa. I got you baby, I got you. One more for me, just one more.” He shook his head back and forth, pulling the orgasm right out of you as you screamed out his name.

He continued to praise you, all the way through your post orgasm. His face was still buried between your thighs as he gave your pussy light kitten licks, and a chaste kiss before you were physically yanking his head up.

“Too much? I wasn’t completely finished with you, querida.” His lips were held in a plush pout as he looked up at you. His big, puppy dog brown eyes were melting your heart all over again.

“Jav, baby. I love you but you’re gonna have to give me a few after that one..Jesus fuck.”

“Mmm. That’s okay baby. I can stay right here. I don’t mind at all. Can I give her a kiss? Just a little one.”

“You fucking— fine. Just know, you have completely wrecked me, beautiful boy.”

Javi pressed one more light kiss to your sensitive clit before his hands slid from your ass to rest upon your thighs, rubbing soothing circles into the plush skin.

“I love you cariño. I’m not just saying that cause I’m a little pussy drunk right now. Okay, not a little, a lot actually. I just want to remind you that you are quite literally the most beautiful woman, mi amor. Mi corazón y mi alma son tuyos. (My love, my heart and soul are yours.”

“Javi, this isn’t you trying to sweet talk your way into eating me out again, is it?” You looked down at him with a playful grin, narrowing your eyes when his stuck his tongue out ever so slightly—

“I don’t think I have to do much sweet talking for that pretty girl.” He squeezed your thighs beneath his warm palms. “Just want to remind you how much you mean to me.” he let his one hand that was grasped around your thigh, drop to the nightstand beside the bed. He pulled open the drawer before grabbing his box of cigarettes and lighter, placing one of the cigarettes between his lips. He gently scooted your thighs back slightly as you grabbed the lighter and leaned down over him, lighting the tip of the cigarette as he inhaled, looking up at you.

“Well, I love you too, Javi. Mi corazón y mi alma son tuyos.” You softly spoke as he took a deep inhale of his cigarette, while his free hand stayed wrapped around your thigh.

“Siempre, mi amor.” He confirmed, knowing that one day he would marry you, make you his wife. Spend the rest of his days with you by his side, in his arms.

Always, my love.

Tag list: @chaotic-mystery @peterhollandkait @loquaciousferret @userpedros @meveispunk @lovers-liability @atinylittlepain @777-wonders @korynnekorynne @novemberrain-writes @cutesyscreenname @bearsbeetsbeskar @beskarandblasters @yazsos @soaringcloud @soft-cryptids @pr0ximamidnight @last-girl @pedgeitopascal @kirsteng42 @dinsdjrn @mirasantidotes @dreamingofdaddydin @thetriumphantpanda

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[nerdieforpedro]

When Our Time Meets

Javier Peña x plus size ofc

Summary: The rides to work are wonderful and could lead to something more but tragedy strikes. Can a new path forward be forged?

Notes: This is the darkest thing I’ve written to date. Please review the warnings carefully if you decide to enjoy the work.

Fanfiction 18+

Masterlist/ Javier Pena Masterlist

Warnings: allusion to smut, mentions of sex work, mentions of violence, actual violence and descriptions of body parts, SA (sexual assault), cursing, PTSD, drug use (illegal and legal), weapon use, self-esteem issues, self-doubt, stalking, breaking and entering, intimidation, murder/self-defense, fluff near the end

Javier’s rides with Rosa were never long and always from her apartment to work or from her apartment to Steve’s house where his wife Connie insisted, they had dinner to bring some sort of normalcy to their lives. The DEA agent knew she worked at the hospital with Connie and was a nurse, but what Connie did, he didn’t remember, and he knew Steve would be mad that he didn’t remember.

The short chats, mainly about nothing, gave Javier a sliver of hope that after they caught Escobar, there might be peace and more chats like this in Bogota and Medellín, there wouldn’t be bodies in the streets or houses and so many gunshot wounds and drug overdoses in the hospital where Rosa worked. She was pleasant, he normally saw her in pastel pink scrubs and on occasion, in a flowing dress for those dinners. They never clung close to her body; he could tell that she was thick which wasn’t bad, not bad at all, Javier wondered at times what it would be like to wrap his himself within her softness between her legs or breasts. What sounds she would make, what expressions would she give him, what would they talk about the morning after?

Javier was used to prostitutes and other women who only came for sex, word was around about him and his skills in a bed, hood of a car, in a bathroom stall, your childhood bedroom, wherever you could pin him down or pin you down if you want. Some of the sex workers gave him a discount, he still paid they full price, it did make his chest puff out that they offered. Javier however still need time alone with his thoughts which is why he never had anyone stay the night or vice Versa. He needed a strong drink and puffs on his cigarette to try and blur the images he saw daily, bodies mutilated, mothers, brothers, fathers, sisters, sons and daughters crying for their loved ones who had died. On the same token, there were those who hated that the police and government that were coming after their folk hero, Escobar. That damn demon.

Rosa though, was someone neutral who he could ask silly things like what books she reads and what she does on days off, he noticed that she didn’t mention any boyfriend, girlfriend, or husband. She sometimes mentioned different meals he may want to try cooking, that were simple, not that he was going to cook much anyway, what sides they would pair with. He would pick her up in the evenings when her shift ended and drive her home, otherwise she would walk. The nurse insisted she was fine, but Javier knew all too well, it could change instantly.

Sadly, it turned out it did change.

Rosa had been in a relationship two years prior with a man who she felt she may settle down with, however, that changed the day she came back to her apartment and found drugs on her kitchen table. She had cursed her boyfriend out and threw him and his drugs out, it got physical, and she couldn’t go to work because of her injuries (busted lip, bruises, dislocated shoulder, and internal bleeding). Eventually she recovered, she only told Connie after she had dropped by her place and saw her injuries. Connie all but forced Rosa to give the man’s name and information to her husband Steve. The nurse did but Steve was only able to find out that yes, he had indeed gotten into bed with Escobar’s gang and no he was not in town thankfully, though Steve would check from time to time to try and make sure he hadn’t come back for her. Rosa focused on getting healthy and back to work, which she did. And the car rides with Javier were fun though she thought odd when he first offered, but since that bastard had stolen her car when he left, it did make it easier to get to from work most days.

Javier recalled the first dinner where he met Rosa. A flowing red dress enveloped her body as she stood to shake his hand, a warm smile on her face. No makeup, still beautiful, gentle hands with a strong grip. Her dark hair was in an updo, spreading out from the top of her head like a pineapple, that made him chuckle. Her honey eyes seemed suspicious of his grin, but she didn’t give any signs that she was the least bit uncomfortable with him, but not particularly interested either. This made Javier even more curious about the woman before him. Had Steve or Connie mentioned his rather expansive history to her, and it turned her off or was it something else?

“Hello, I’m Rosa. Nice to meet you, Connie and Steve have told me a lot about you Mr. Peña.” She chimed. Javi shook his head and smiled back. Did they now… What exactly did they tell her? Is it because she’s a friend of Connie’s that they would cockblock him? Steve would if Connie said so. That’s what love does to a man, sounds almost as dangerous as the cartel.

“No, no the pleasure’s mine and please hermosa, call me Javier or Javi. Mr. Peña is my father.” He chuckled, the four sat back down to eat. What they talked about he didn’t remember, he just stole glances at her from across the table laughing at whatever Steve just said, he’s not that funny, Javi knew that. The night was uneventful, the best kind. Connie’s casseroles were passable per usual, but Rosa had brought a chocolate cake with cream cheese icing. Javier ended up licking that icing off his fingers. Rosa couldn’t look away especially when the DEA agent struggled to get the icing out of his mustache, she offered to help him wipe with a moist napkin. Javier happily obliged guiding her hand to his facial hair. It was a moment that didn’t go unnoticed. Steve pulled Javi aside.

“No. You have so many other women, they literally come to you. She is Connie’s friend. No Peña.” His parter said sternly. Steve knew why it would be bad for Peña to bed her. His partner could likely get under Mother Teresa’s habit and have screaming for The Lord her savior. But not her, not after what she went though and not while they were close to getting Escobar. Steve had to have extra security for his wife and the baby due to threats and increased violence. Javier rolled his eyes but agreed, it would honestly be for the best. Acquaintances they would stay until Javier wasn’t able to pick her up after work. They did?! Damn it to hell, but he’s not wrong. Fine.

It was three months later, Javi arrived in the evening to the hospital to pick Rosa up. He gave it 15 minutes and then went inside, asking after her. Most hasn’t seen the nurse but two of her co-workers came over to him, looking worried.

“You’re the guy who picks her up in the evenings right? Could you check on her? We’ve called but she either doesn’t answer or when she does, her voiced is hushed like she doesn’t want someone to hear her talking.” They explained, they mentioned it to their manager, but all they were able to do was to call the police and have them do a wellness check. The police were far busier with Escobar and the rampant violence and drugs. The pair further explained that it had been a week since they had last seen her.

Driving over to Rosa’s apartment was easy, he cursed the entire time and made sure he had his badge and that his gun was loaded. Fuck! Fuck! Fuck! What could have happened?! Rosa doesn’t go anywhere…that I know of. But she would have called, she’s responsible, irritatingly so that she gets me lavender oils from time to time. It just makes me think of her before I go out for the evening to drink and work away some frustration. If anything’s happened to her, the fucker better pray he’s dead.

Rosa enjoyed her rides with Javier, sometimes she would tease him by calling him “Agent Peña” or “Javier” and a sour look would appear on his face, like he sucked on a lime. Talking with him was one of the only enjoyable times she had spent with a man in the last two years. She did advise him to get more sleep and gave him oils and teas to help, he always took them, but she wasn’t sure if he used them or not. She remembered asking him if he didn’t sleep due to nightmares, she tried to think of him having PTSD from the things he’s done, things he’s seen and who knows what else. There were nights where she thought about letting Javier in, she was well aware of his reputation, and she was curious about two weeks ago and asked:

Javier pulled up to her apartment building, “Cariño, I have a collection of those oils, you don’t need to get me anymore.” Mainly because I’m thinking of you when I put them on my chest and jerk myself off after I drop you at home. The curves under those scrubs, I want to grope them and have you moan and scream for me. “Have a good night, okay?” Javier looked forward at her apartment building, he knew she lived on the third floor and if his eyes spent any more time on her, he might be fully hard instead of a manageable half which he could pull his shirt over.

Rosa lingered. She squeezed her soft hands into fists and looked up Javier who usually didn’t look at her when got in the car or got out. It was odd, but she was getting a free ride, so she didn’t ask about that. “Javier,” his face got that sour look again, “did you want to come up for some dinner? I have some left-over rice and tamales my neighbor taught me how to make. I think they taste pretty good; I could use a second opinion.” She sheepishly asked the agent, looking up from her fists to his mustache that was hanging above an ‘O’ his mouth had made. He had his sunglasses on like always so she couldn’t see his dark brown eyes she only saw on dinners with the Murphys or on the two times they had went out for dinner and gotten some delicious tapas and the other time and enchiladas. I always remember my time with Javier so vividly, I wonder if he does the same? Maybe not. I’m a friend of his partner’s wife. I’m not sure why he still gives me rides, we chat sure but never about anything important. I should have just left it…

“Si hermosa. I could get a bite to eat.” Peña turned the car off and stepped out of the car, walking around to open the door for her, ever the gentleman. The first time he did it, Rosa told him he didn’t have to, which Javier took great offense to. He told her as long as she’s riding with him, wait for him to open the door. He was not some pendejo, he was a lot of things, but not that. Rosa laughed and took him at his word. He was one of the few people she knew she could. She got her keys out and open the outer apartment door and they walked up to her apartment.

“Sorry for the mess.” Rosa muttered before opening her door, she was trying to remember if she had cleaned on her last day off, her mind was blank. Thankfully, there was only her laundry basket on her coffee table with her basic navy-blue panties sitting front and center a top the pile of clothes. She removed her shoes, set her keys and back down and swiftly went for the basket. Javier followed suit and removed his shoes too and locked her door. He didn’t like how flimsy it was, he was going to have to look into what kind of lock he had. He could see it, he didn’t know the name. He would check when he got home so he could buy it later this week. Peña had seen the panties and smirked, watching her try to take them into her bedroom. Her apartment was small, but tidy except for the laundry. There were books along the walls and some on the table, she did have some plants in the window, pictures of family, friends and the Murphys were on her walls and shelves. I wonder if I’ll be in one of those frames one day. That would be nice, to be a part of something, of someone’s life, so much so they want to remember. I haven’t thought about that since….fuck. I should eat and leave otherwise…

“It’s fine Rosa, you’ve got a nice place, like you bonita. Not the normal shade of blue you wear though.” Javier chuckled and hung his jacket up. The apartment smelled like her, soft, clean, slightly like disinfectant he assumed from working at the hospital so much. I want to know what she smells like otherwise, this I’m familiar with. Getting her mixed up with my fingers and…

Rosa blushed slightly and nodded. “Thanks. Sit anywhere. I’m just going to get plates and heat up the food.” She clapped after emerging from her bedroom and headed to the kitchen. Javier motioned to follow her to the kitchen area, but she shooed him away. “You drive me all the time, so it’s fine. Please sit and relax.” Her hand touched his bicep and she squeezed, the nurse hadn’t meant to, but it was an arm she had such racy thoughts, more often as time when on. She stepped back and quickly reached for the plates, exhaling the breath she had held in. Javier stepped back and sat on the couch, satisfied that the woman who seemed to be immovable as far as his attraction appeared to be feeling the same, he wasn’t entirely crazy. Only a little bit.

The nurse heated and plated the food in silence, trying to think of anything to talk about. He poked fun at her underwear but that was kinda funny. Wait… He knows my favorite blue is royal blue. I shouldn’t have invited him in, this was a bad idea. I can’t treat the man like he’s a piece of meat. Just because…I would like to, but he’s a person. A very nice, handsome, sensual – that voice of his… Rosa lost her concentration and left part of the foil she used to wrap the tamales on when she heated them and a loud bzztt came from the microwave, she turned off, but Javier had already popped up and was behind her, grabbing her by her shoulders and pulling her back. She yelped and fell back onto Javier, her wide and plush backside crashing into his hips. Javier let out a sound that was halfway between a groan and a moan. Rosa stiffened because she felt it. It was throbbing and pressing between her cheeks, only barred by Javi’s jeans and her scrub bottoms. “You alright hermosa?” He asked, almost panting, it was getting to be too much, he was going to have to get out of here or… “Rosa, are you okay?” She hadn’t responded to the first question. Taking a step forward, she just nodded. Rosa wasn’t sure what sound she would make if she opened her mouth, she felt moisture between her thighs and she knew she had been startled but not so much to pee herself so that left…Him talking to her, asking her if she’s alright, no she is not. She turned and saw him with his hands on the small island of her kitchen, his chest rising and falling. Her eyes wavered down his slender waist and then his crotch, she caught herself and gulped.

“Javier…” She expected the sour face, but it didn’t come. Maybe he can’t focus enough to make his usual one, his face was contorted in pain, his brow had sweat dotted across it. “I…sorry I left the foil on, I think. Um…should we eat?” I have to pretend like I don’t notice, play dumb, focus on food. It looks huge, like too big. Is he spreading all of Bogeta open with that….I want it. He’s not a piece of meat damn it! I invited him in to eat….eat food. Food. She removed the plate from microwave, took the rest of the foil off, popped it back on. “We can start eating the rice.” She said flatly with her back to Javier.

The willpower on this woman. Dammit to hell…Fuck Murphy. I need to know. Javier stepped around Rosa and stood in front of her, he took both hands and cupper her face. “So soft, hermosa, have you never thought about being with me? Not even once. I’m not saying tonight but any night or day. I want to make you cry with moans and be in your pictures holding you in that blue dress you like. I prefer the red though, makes you look like and apple that’s going to drip around my mouth.” Peña spoke so rapidly, that Rosa only caught parts of what he said. His dark brown eyes showed her that he was serious, that he meant every word he said. That scared her, that type of determination to have her had only been shown by one other man and he hurt her, damaged her.

“Javi. Javi I do want to but could…could we just take it slow?” Rosa asked, her eyes tearing. She loathed that she was scared, scared of love, scared of his desire for her. Javier had given her no reason not to be. He was kind, funny, smart, smoked too much, drank too much, honest about both and already been more reliable than any man she had dated previously. She would need time, she thought she had healed but clearly, she had not. “I’m so sorry. I just…” Her hands slid over his, “I love you, Javier. I’m a bit out of practice so just be patient.” I’m a coward. I just can’t let him in, not yet.

Her lie was evident to Javier, but he knew better than to push her, he would wait. He didn’t do well with waiting, even on stakeouts, if Steve wasn’t there with him to keep him calm, he’d rather go in and tear the place up, it took too long. Peña had found someone to bide his time for. The pair sat down and ate tamales and rice, chatting about books and more things that had nothing to do with what they had just said to each other. He did help Rosa wash the dishes, after many protests from her. She walked the agent out, but he made sure to touch her hip softly and kiss her cheek, then her lips softly. Javi knew he couldn’t linger, he would want her plush body against the door, melting into her and he just said he would give her time, though the nurse’s hand did grab his collar, she let go, smiling weakly as she told him good night. I wanted him to stay, am I ready? Or not? This is so confusing. I do know I want those lips again.

One week ago, Rosa had come home and gotten ready for bed per her usual routine. There was a knock at her door, and Rosa assumed it was one of her neighbors and peered through the peephole. It was him. He was back, he said he wanted to talk. She told him that if he was still working for Escobar, there was nothing to say. Fuck him. Rosa walked away from the door and got a knife from the kitchen. She didn’t want any guns in her house, they scared her. She saw what they did to the bodies of those that were shot. He left for now and Rosa contemplated calling Steve or Javier but wasn’t sure if they would even be able to come. She knew who they were chasing and what a cost it came to them personally, she wasn’t sure about Javi, but she knew from Connie that it’s why there was an unmarked car outside their house every night and sometimes during the day. Rosa found Javier’s card he had given her with both his office number and his personal one written on the back, it made her smile and she put it in one of her scrub top pockets. He seemed to be a kind man but a darkness shadowed him rough edges required for his job but what was really underneath? Rose sighed and decided it wasn’t for her to know, right now, she needed to worry about her safety. She would give him her answer later, there’s time. The nurse didn’t sleep much that night and awoke in the morning and went to work per usual, Javier picked her up and dropped her off. Their banter was a bit more playful since they had revealed their feelings for one another with her touching Javier’s arms and him touching her thighs in the car, nothing was ever too much though, they were in public. If anyone was going to see Rosa uncoil, it would be Javier when he had her to himself.

Rosa’s ex-boyfriend had been watching her be dropped off by Javier one night after work, seething that she was with someone else. Not only had she humiliated him by actually kicking him out and leaving injuries on him (not as severe as hers) but he was relegated to grunt work for Escobar’s enforcers, a gofer. Since he got beat up by his own woman, why should he be trusted with any heavy lifting, they scoffed and mocked him. This bitch also had the nerve to not only turn him away yesterday but also be riding in some other man’s car? He saw the way that man was looking at her, the way she laughed, a full laugh where she moved her whole body, he hated it. They were clearly fucking, likely in the car on the way home from work. He had only planned to scare her into taking him back but now his abhorrence for her overtook him and he dropped the flowers he bought for her, no longer needing them. He bided his time until the wee hours the morning. He waited until a clueless man held the door open for him and he entered, heading to apartment on the second floor, the locks had been changed but now he was good at picking them. Once inside, he went into her bedroom where she slept, watching her, he would wait, wait until she was awake for work, but it turned out to be a day off so she slept in until late morning, even better because that meant most of the people were out of the apartment building at work.

Rosa yawned and woke in the morning, getting up to use the bathroom and brush her teeth, she also washed her face. She hasn’t brought her knife in with her, still thinking about if she should mention it to Javier the next time for work. She chuckled to herself as the thought of their conversation yesterday, he said that he finally tried the baked chicken with cheese and broccoli and it was good, he just should have used more seasoning, he hadn’t been sure how much to use. Rosa had laughed and told him to season it to suit his taste, but he told her he’d rather know what her tastes were as far as seasoning. It made her blush and Javier grinned, teeth flashing from under his mustache. She told him that she would make it for him sometime and he could see then, he agreed, and they parted ways.

“I wonder if Javi would peppers and onions in it. It might be better with beans then…” she mused to herself drying her face. Footsteps came toward her and she shivered, praying that she was just paranoid, but in the mirror, she saw him. Staring right at her seething.

“Cocinas para ese cabrón? Eh! Eh! Rosa?!” He screamed, grabbing her and shoving his gun in her face. “For that fucker….he’s been in here with you on that bed hasn’t he?” He pulled her hair back so she could see him in the mirror, he enjoyed seeing her so scared, thrives on it. “Le chupaste la polla y lo dejaste follar, ¿verdad? Eres una puta.” Rose shook her head. Javier had walked her to her door a few times but never came inside. But he knew about him? Has he been following her? But when?

“No, never. He just takes me to work and back. Por qué estás aquí? Por qué?” Rosa cried. She had prayed last night before going to bed she was wrong. He would have just left, he hadn’t been here for 2 years, why come now? She reached behind her to try and hit him, scratch him, anything to distract him so she could run, but it only made him more angry and he hit her with the handle of the gun and pulled her toward the bed. That’s where the true nightmare began. He violated her, made her cry and slapped her for being so loud with her screams. He put the gun to her temple and told her he would pull it if she kept on with her crying. She told him to do it since this was a fate worse than death.

He stared at her, was she always this headstrong? To where she wouldn’t break? And what did she mean that death was worse than him? Was it the guy in the car, was it another? Was it something else entirely? He clicked his teeth and took out a small baggie, and snorted the white powder within, and went for her again, this time leaving bruises and some scratches. He went to the kitchen to eat and took the knife that she had and set it on the counter, he made himself a sandwich and kept himself awake for four days while he alternated violating her, eating and snorting more coke.

The fifth day lead into the next week, Rosa had called out at work Friday, Monday and Tuesday. When asked about why she needed so many days off and if she was okay, she paused. That asshole was standing behind her with his gun to her back and her knife to her throat. As much as she had told him to kill her, Rosa didn’t want to die, not like this. The nightmare continued but she was waiting for an opening, she knew even coke heads crashed eventually. It happened after he had snorted and violated her again. He tried to stay awake but crashed, Rosa took the opportunity waited until the late morning, she turned up her music, blaring it from her speakers to where it made her ears hurt. I need it to stop. It must stop. But…I’ll be a killer…damn him! Fuck him to hell!

She didn’t hear the banging at the door or her name being called, she focused and breathed in and out, focusing on breathing. Rosa stood over her rapist on the bed, pointing his own gun down at him. She pulled the trigger and kept pulling, her arm seared with pain from the recoil. Rosa kicked his body over to make sure he was dead, see that his chest wasn’t moving, there were pieces of it scattered on the bed and at her feet. Six shots at point blank range.

Javier kicked down the door, she wasn’t answering calls and loud music was coming from her apartment. He feared the worst, he hadn’t started a relationship with her for this reason, he was going to wait for her. Let her have her time. The DEA agent wasn’t prepared for what he saw, sweet Rosa beaten and blooded, in her own and now blood splatter from her nightmare. She kept clicking the gun despite there being no more bullets. Javier approached her slowly, hands raised, he reached down to turn the volume all the way down on her speakers. The loss of noise startled Rosa and she jumped, nearly filling off the bed, Javi braced her fall, and they sat on the bed together, his arms wrapped around her, cradling her, she hadn’t let go of the gun.

“I’m sorry I didn’t call you Javier.” Rosa whispered, dropping the gun. “I should have, and I ignored it, I thought about it and I should have. Then I…this…it…I killed him. There’s a gun in my house and drugs…Por qué Javier? Por qué!” She started to sob, tears that had been beaten out of her the first two days gushed from her eyes, Javier just held her, stroking her head. There was no way he could tell her she was okay, she wasn’t, not after something like this and not in this world with Escobar still at large. His kind Rosa, who he had only seen laugh, scrunch her face sometimes and the one time he’d seen her cry with what he thought were tears of joy. She didn’t deserve this, no one deserved this. Was it because she knew him? Who was this guy? He should have changed those locks sooner.

The next few hours were a blur for Rosa, at some point, Javier called Steve who spoke to their boss, and it was decided after checking the surrounding apartments, that they would get rid of the body, Rosa ended up at the hospital, undergoing tests, assessments and blood draws. It was the first time she was a patient, she found that she had a fractured clavicle and ribs and well as sprains and bruising to her pelvis and tears inside of her from that man’s drug-fueled rage. She asked if her family could not be called and it was good to see her coworkers, they brought gifts and food. Meanwhile, Connie fought with Steve about where Rosa should stay, obviously not in that apartment. Steve didn’t really have any good options, but she’d be in the hospital at least a week. Javier spent time looking into the bastard Rosa had shot dead. He was only vaguely related to Escobar; it appeared as more of a domestic violence case gone worst case scenario. He beat her before and stole her car, only to stalk her before return to get his revenge. Javier was angry that he was dead because he couldn’t torture him and kill him himself but more than that, he hadn’t wanted his Rosa to attacked, beaten, and violated. He only wanted good things for her.

Wait…his Rosa? Javier Peña, if you thought you couldn’t before you definitely cannot now. She’s as vulnerable as a person can get. She is healing physically and who knows if she’ll ever recover mentally. He pushed the longing deep within himself, and visited Rosa in the hospital, she was happy to see him and he her. They chatted about the silly pleasantries they did before, but her black eye and busted lip reminded him that it couldn’t go back to how it used to be. Rosa dosed off while listening to Javier talk about how bad Steve’s Spanish still is. He kissed her forehead and left her room. He had an appointment to keep, he needed to get his mind off her quickly, so he stopped by a brothel, claiming to be looking for tips on Escobar but he needed to fuck his feelings away, though he couldn’t quite do that, it felt wrong given the state of things. So, Javier leaned more into work, drinking and smoking.

After a week, Rosa came to stay with the Murphy’s to recuperate. She helped Connie with the baby and did some light housework though both Steve and Connie told her not to. Javier drove Rosa to and from doctor’s appointments and physical therapy, they talked about cats, music, anything but real thoughts or feelings. The pair couldn’t, timing was off, they thought they had more but now it was broken. Steve noticed that Javi was getting heavier bags under his eyes, smoking more packs a day, and he was drinking more. He worried for his partner, but things came to ahead at another family dinner.

“The hell you are Rosa! It’s only been a month, a month, you can’t be alone.” Javier shot up and screamed. Rosa stated her case calmly and repeated herself.

“I’m going to move into one of the apartments near the hospital. It’s has a security system and some of my coworkers live there too.” They were solid reasons, they also meant that Javier wouldn’t need to drive her and would only see her at these dinners. She also wouldn’t have the protective detail that Steve has at his place for his wife. Javier didn’t like any of it. He did ask for a detail for her as well, but since she had ‘killed the paper-thin link to Escobar’ as the suits put it, Rosa was lucky they weren’t sticking her in jail for manslaughter, though she has an overwhelming case for self-defense. Javier walked outside and lit a cigarette, he was pissed. Angry at everything and his inability to be able to fix any of it. He knew none of it was in his control, but what else was he supposed to do?

Rosa followed Javier outside, she had debated whether to tell him. Things had been distant with him, understandably so, but she preferred their banter from before, not this hollow shell. She felt like Javier only saw her as another victim and not as a person, it was also why she was leaving the Murphy’s. She was getting stronger and able to do more but they wouldn’t let her. Next month she’d be able to return to work on light duty. Javier hadn’t taken her improved health well either, he said she should take it easy, relax. But when she was idle, her mind made her paranoid and recall what happened, she didn’t want that. Rosa wanted to forget too, but she wasn’t a drinker, smoker, and now had an aversion to anyone even mentioning sex. So usual vices were out. She needed to work, babysitting and cleaning wasn’t enough. Rosa also wasn’t sure if what they had discussed before this nightmare happened was still viable. Likely not, she was even more broken now then before. She often wondered if she had accepted and just went with Javier’ advances, if it would have even happened, could she have prevented it?

“Javier…. I’m sorry I didn’t tell you sooner.” Rosa said in a small voice, she truly was sorry. She didn’t want to keep anything from him, but it was all too much.

The agent huffed; he knew she didn’t owe him an explanation. “I overreacted. It’s your decision. I just worry, that’s all cariño.” He turned to face her slowly, dropping and snuffing out the lit butt with bottom of his shoe.

“I still should have told you.” Rosa sighed, it was her decision, but she still felt guilty. “I feel I owe you though. I know you’re going say you don’t, but I feel you do. You’re important to me Javier.” Her eyes focused on him; she had said too much. “It…I..” She stuttered trying to find the words. It wasn’t something she could easily describe.

Javier held her gaze, stepping close to her and holding her hand as he kissed her cheek. “I know. We’re at an odd place in this dance cariño. I want you to be safe, healthy, happy. I don’t think I can give you any of that, I can’t hold you back from so many good things.” His lips pecked her forehead, his chin settling on the top of her head. An arm snaked around his back, rubbing it.

“Hombre estúpido. You’re a good man Javier Peña. A good man for me. I just need more time. I want you to see me as a whole woman and not just…damaged.” Her head laid on his chest, tears started to form in her eyes, or felt like for the last month she had spent to much time crying in front of him, she felt foolish. I’m tired of crying. I’m tired of time, but now isn’t it. I can’t. he needs someone who can support him and I don’t know if I can support myself yet.

Javier held her tighter, stroking her hair. He had to let her go, he didn’t want to though, he wasn’t sure if he could keep her safe, he never did get to try that baked chicken dish. “We’re all damaged cariño. I see you for all that you are. A strong woman who I never want to make angry that’s for damn sure.” Rosa laughed; it was the first time she had a real one in the last few weeks. Do I have to let her go? I don’t want to. I said I’d give her the time she needs, that’s still valid. Or was I lying to myself and her? What kind of man am I? Am I the good man she claims I am? Rosa’s arms linked around Javier’s back, rubbing his shoulder blades.

“You could never make me truly angry Javi. Frustrated maybe, but not angry.” She smiled through her puffy eyes and kissed his chin; she was short and round. It always did kinda piss her off that in order to reach those lips of his, she’d have to be on her tiptoes. Javier sighed, he wiped the wet streaks off her cheeks and kissed her forehead. The worst she truly could say was no and they he could say he at least asked.

“Have you signed the paperwork for the new place? If not, you can move in with me. That way I can keep an eye on you. I may even get that promised baked chicken.” Pena chuckled and squeezed her cheeks, cupping them and as finger traced her nose and lips. “Mira hermosa, other than being here with Steve and his wife, I don’t trust you being anywhere else. Rosa please, if only so I know you’re safe. What we talked about before…” Javi paused, trying to think of what to say, rare for him. He always knew what to say. “It doesn’t have to be because of that, I just don’t want to see you hurt anymore and if I can help, Por favor, de`jame ayudarte Rosa.”

The nurse hated it, she hated that she was going to cry again, her face was starting to be fore from all this crying. She shook her head and the agent let go of her face, dejected, but only manage a small frown. Rosa grabbed his shoulders and pulled him toward her and down so she could reach those lips of his finally. She was hungry and Javier obliged, their tongues dancing and his hands roamed her hips and back, when their kiss broke, the pair panted. “Yes Javier. Yes to living with you and I don’t want to wait anymore, I love you and I want to be by your side.” Rosa chirped and popped up to kiss his nose. Javier’s face lit up as he buried his face into her neck and shoulder, nipping at her gently. “Te amo carino. We’ll tell Steve and Connie shortly but let’s just enjoy our time together.” A hand ran through her ponytail as Javier stood back up looking into her irritated eyes, Rosa nodded and swayed in Javi’s arms.

“Our time together sounds perfect.”

Tag list: @morallyinept @fhatbhabie @pedritapascal @pascalsanctuary @nissaimmortal @grogusmum @theywhowriteandknowthings @beefrobeefcal @goodwithcheese @iamasaddie @psychedelic-ink @modernperplexity @basicoccult @pamasaur @pedrorascal @marcus-is-my-muse @clawdee @mintypossum @trulybetty @perotovar @joelslegalwhre @josephquinnswhore @mandoisapunk @awilderi @deviinci @saintsssrow @oonajaeadira @mysterious-moonstruck-musings

#fanfiction #pedro pascal characters #pedro pascal #javier pena fanfiction #javier peña #javier pena fic #javier pena x reader #javier pena imagine #javier pena x you #Javier pena x plus size female reader #writing #pedro pascal fanfiction #fanfic #it is dark

[joelsgreys]

🍂 joelsgreys weekly recap 🍂

hello friends! here we are at my very first weekly recap! i really wish i could have come up with a more creative name but this is all i got. anyway, i am so grateful to be back to engaging with the community, this is the best i have felt in a long time, i feel…i feel human again. and because i feel human again, i have the capacity, time, and energy to really engage with others and not only that, but i can enjoy it. thank you all sm for welcoming me back after several weeks of me just popping in and out, after a name change, and after i had all those bumps in the road.

fic recs

here’s some of what i read and enjoyed over the last couple of weeks!

🔥 indicates smut, please be sure to heed all tags/warnings by the author, all blogs and works are 18+ only, MINORS DNI.

Sequins by @trulybetty 🔥

Joel Miller x Female Reader

Summary: On a night out with friends, you run into a broad-shouldered stranger and there's no denying that there's an immediate attraction between the two of you.

Deliver Me From Nowhere by @atinylittlepain

Joel Miller x OFC Reader

there is no series summary, but please mind the tags as this fic does involve dark themes including domestic violence. but it’s such a beautifully written story, Gin’s talent is out of this world.

Born lucky, under a bad star by @softlyspector

Joel Miller x Female Reader

Summary: Joel has always been lucky, in the worst of ways. *major spoilers for tlou part 2

daydreams by @morning-star-joy

Joel Miller x Female Reader

Summary: It's been years since Joel's kissed anybody, and your lips are all he can think about.

a matter of time by @cupofjoel 🔥

Joel Miller x Female Reader

Summary: joel can't remember the last time he took things slow and let himself feel. you give him a gentle reminder.

HAVE YOU EVER SEEN THE RAIN by @psychedelic-ink 🔥 (i’m not yelling okay the title is in all caps….but i am yelling at how hot this was)

Javier Peña x Plus Size Female Reader

Summary: it's the 80s. when the dig you've been working at has to take a short break due to escobar and politics, you decide to wait it out at medellín. while hitchhiking, a charming stranger pulls up.

stay here, honey by @swiftispunk 🔥

DBF! Joel Miller x Female Reader

summary: [no outbreak] p*rn no plot. you sit on dbf!joel's lap at a party, it's a whole thing

Divine Dynasty Series by @cavillscurls 🔥

AU Mafia! Joel Miller x Female Reader

Summary: Your father had been a loyal asset to the Miller Clan for his entire life. After his passing, Joel feels a responsibility for you and your safety; inviting you further into his world, and your desires.

a lover’s pinch by @hier--soir 🔥

AU Professor! Joel Miller x Female Reader

Summary: a one-night stand with a charming texan turns into something much more thrilling when you discover he is your new college professor. joel miller is entirely off limits. but now that you’ve had a taste, will you be able to keep your hands to yourselves?

*only 1.5 chapters in so expect to see this in the next recap too lmao.

beautiful fall divider by @saradika

#vee’s recs #fic recs #weekly recap

[lavendertales]

indecently dishonest—Javier Peña x plus!size f!reader

requested by @ilovepuppies99:

summary: time after time, you keep hearing and seeing Javier with all these women & it breaks your heart knowing he'd never look at you twice. But after a near-fatal situation that rips you away from him, Javier finally mans up.

word count: 1.2k

warnings: mentions of injuries & guns; allusions to smut though nothing explicit. This kind of got a bit sappy, forgive me. Nonetheless,

AGELESS/EMPTY BLOGS & MINORS WILL BE BLOCKED!

Looking at him hurts. Every fugitive glance, every greeting early in the morning whispered in a husky tone, it all hurts. Especially when you know what you know.

Living in the same apartment building with Javier had seemed like a good idea at the time. With you working at the embassy—mostly handling documents and files for agents such as Javier or Steve Murphy—you thought it might be good to have a ride along in the mornings and just generally be close to someone you knew.

Big mistake.

You failed to realize just how much of a ladies’ man Javier was. Of course you noticed he was very attractive and you figured women would line up waiting to be asked out by him. But you quickly found out that Javier was not interested in dating.

No, his needs were simply carnal. A basic transaction of bodily fluids after which both parties were left sated and, ideally, the female party left the apartment with no expectations other than a potential second experience of the sort.

Whenever Javier had his female companions over, you hated living right next door. You hated the thin walls and how you could hear all the pleasure the women were receiving. Their moans, their shaky breaths as they came, the shouting of Javier’s name… you hated all of it. You hated the way your imagination drifted away and led you to a foreign, strange territory where you wondered what position they were in, whether he went down on them or not, what his favorite way of coming was… God, how you hated this.

Especially because you knew Javier wouldn’t look at you twice.

You were no fool; you saw the kind of women who left his apartment either in the middle of the night or right after sex. You saw them being tall and slender, appealing cleavage and long legs, presumably perky ass… and you were quite far from that. You were always on the curvier side, and while you had no problem with it and learned to accept your body the way it was, you weren’t as delusional as to think Javier would be interested in you. You clearly weren’t his type, and that was made obvious not just by the parade of women you have been seeing for the past months.

Javier was just a colleague. He sometimes engaged in small talk with you, but never anything more than that. Just the usual morning ride-along to work, some thank you’s whenever you helped him out with something and “see you tomorrow” when you arrived back home. You often thought he was purposely trying to stay away from you for whatever reason, but that thought caused you even more pain.

And then you got shot.

You were out of work for a couple of weeks, during which Steve and Connie regularly visited you. Even Colonel Carrillo brought you flowers and a get well card from him and his wife Juliana.

But no sign of Javier.

From what Steve told you, he did ask around about you and seemed concerned once he heard what happened, but there was not even a knock on your door from his side. You almost began to think that he was glad you got shot. Which was horrendous to think about, but your mind ran on its own delusional fuel at this point.

You suppose it’s because a part of you was so smitten by Javier that you always hoped he’d somehow feel the same.

But if your injury was proof of anything, was that the truth was far from that. Javier didn’t care. And maybe you shouldn’t, either.

You were all showered up and ready to curl up in bed with a book when you heard the knock on the door. You answered grudgingly, shook to remark the silhouette before you.

“Javier,” you cooed, your throat almost closing up. “What are you doing here?”

“I should’ve come earlier. I’m sorry.”

“For what? Not giving a shit about me when I got hurt? It’s fine.”

He could sense the slight resentment in your voice and he took it gladly. He knew he’d been a piece of shit about the whole situation, but oh, if only you’d knew—

“Murphy said you got shot and… I’ve never been more fucking scared in my life,” Javier muttered.

To which you remained shocked at the revelation.

“I didn’t come over because I couldn’t—seeing you hurt, I couldn’t do it.”

“I don’t need some pity excuse from you, Javier.”

“This is not that.”

“It’s getting late. Aren’t you having one of your girls over? If you are, at least let me know beforehand so I can get some earplugs.”

Javier’s eyes widened, his face dropping in shame. “You can hear that?”

“I can hear everything, Javier. And it’s—it fucking hurts.”

The words shouldn’t have come out at all, much less now, but since they were out in the open, you had no choice but to face the consequences of your words.

“It hurts because… I know I’m just a regular colleague to you, the invisible chick who hands you folders and you barely notice.”

“You’re not invisible.”

“Tell that to your face because the way you don’t look at me is—“

“If I’d look at you for too long, I’d… fall for you even more. That’s fucking terrifying for me.”

You opened your mouth as if to add something, but instead, nothing came out. You only stared at Javier, too shocked to form a coherent response, as his face was riddled with guilt and some form of embarrassment.

“I don’t understand,” you eventually murmured, completely disarmed. “I’m nothing like those women you’ve been with.”

“Think you’ve answered your own question.”

“But—you barely look at me, or even acknowledge my existence.”

Javier huffed, inching slightly closer to you at the exact moment your heart began to thrum fast in your ears.

“I thought the more I’d keep you at bay, the easier it’d be. But then you got shot and I—I felt like I lost my fucking mind. I stood in front of your door for minutes on end, wanting to knock, but I couldn’t. I was a fucking coward.”

“So… what you’re saying is… you—you what, have feelings for me?”

The moment you asked that, you regretted it. You knew Javier wasn’t a talkative person, and certainly not about feelings, so you didn’t expect an answer, really.

And you certainly did not expect to watch him inch even closer to you, cup your cheeks ever so boldly and graze them tenderly as he stared into your eyes.

“Is this okay? Can I—?”

You were too speechless to verbally confirm, so all you could do was nod in a near frantic manner and press your lips on his. They were so soft and tender against yours, you instantly melted. You melted under his touch and in his arms, and it finally felt like things were falling into place. There were plenty of things to talk about and to clarify, but in this moment, all else seemed bleak and irrelevant.

Javier was in love with you. It was all you could ever need as hope and strength to carry on during those times.

#requests #Javier Peña x reader #Javier Peña x you #Javier Peña x y/n #Javier Peña x f!reader #Javier Peña x female reader #Javier Peña fanfiction #Javier Peña fic #Javier Peña fluff #javier pena #javier pena x reader #javier pena x you #javier pena x y/n #javier pena x f!reader #javier pena x female reader #javier pena fanfiction #javier pena fic #javier pena fluff #narcos fanfiction #narcos fic #pedro pascal #pedro pascal fanfiction #pedro pascal fic #pedro pascal fluff

[metalnecklace]

There Was Heaven In Your Eyes

Pairing: Javier Peña x Reader (plus size)

Word Count: 3358

Warnings: Canon Typical Violence, Threats of Non-Con, Threats of Violence

Notes: Here’s the first official chapter! Thank you for all the feedback so far. Javi isn’t in the next two chapters as much, but we’ll get there. Also in case anyone missed the tags, the reader is plus sized. She is mentioned as having curves, and later on there is discussion about her weight and clothing issues and whatnot. Other than that the only description of her is that she is female presenting.

Masterlist

Chapter 1

Two Years Earlier

“Fuck,” I groaned, pressing my fingers to my temples.

I had been searching for teaching jobs everywhere, and I meant everywhere. My hands were shaking as I struggled to sort through the piles of ads on my kitchen table, while I tried not to let the mix of sweat and fear bother me while it stuck my hair to the nape of my neck. At that point I didn’t care where I worked as long as I could get out of Canada. Fast.

The idea of starting over scared the shit out of me, but it had to be done. I had worked so hard to climb the financial ladder in order to get to the top of my position, which was huge for a woman in my field, and I had married a wonderful man. My future was laid out for me and wrapped with a shiny bow. Until…

I shook my head and resumed searching, as there was no point strolling down memory lane thinking about what could have been. I had to think about what was going to be.

Finally my eyes landed on an ad.

‘Wanted: Teachers with any experience, preferably English speaking.’

“Any experience?” I thought aloud as my eyes further down the page.

It was short, but sweet. Due to political tensions there was a lack of teachers in Colombia, so they had begun looking elsewhere. The one that specified English speaking ones happened to be in a place called Bogotà. I hadn’t really heard of that place before, but I kept my eye on the news enough to know what they meant by political tensions in Colombia. Everybody knew what they meant.

I didn’t have much time to weigh the pros and cons, and instead rushed to my room to pack my life into the only two suitcases I owned before I could rush off to the airport. I couldn’t seem to fully breathe until I was seated and the airplane finally took off toward my new life. It was a long flight, but I welcomed the newfound safe space where I could finally close my eyes and rest for the first time in what felt like forever.

With my newspaper in hand and my luggage tucked away in a seedy motel, I marched up to the front doors of where I hoped would be my safe haven. Turns out the school wanted to know even less about me than I had been comfortable telling them. They just wanted someone who could keep their head down, remain non judgemental toward the students and their parents, and could do their best when teaching a new language while trying to learn theirs.

It sounded too good to be true, but I couldn’t afford to turn back. I sealed my fate that morning and went about the rest of the day finding a cheap apartment that was within walking distance to my new job.

Within a few months I had started feeling more and more comfortable with my new role as an English teacher in a school that needed discretion and hope more than I did. Many of the parents were involved in situations that I didn’t even want to begin to think about, but their children got to escape and be with their friends while in my care. The only childcare experience I had previous was babysitting my younger sister's children. She was my only family after our parents had died in our teens, but unfortunately life had gotten too busy and outside forces prevented me from seeing her much. It had been at least three years since the last time we had spoken.

My heart ached when I would recognize my nieces faces in the joy and sorrow of my students, but I poured what love I could offer into them and helped them as much as I could.

One of the children in my class had a father who only showed up every once in a while, but the rumours that had spread throughout the faculty were terrifying. He seemed non-threatening, just a little too comfortable talking to the teachers, including myself, at a very close range. Personal space clearly wasn’t his thing, but apparently working for the cartel was. There were whispers that he was one of the higher ups, but I tried to keep my head down and focus on just getting by.

Until one day when he came to pick up his son. He was acting particularly flighty, his eyes shifting every which way. I usually got the chance to tell him how his son had been doing in school, even though I wasn’t sure he fully understood English, but that day he barely said hello. Almost as soon as his car sped off another vehicle pulled up just outside the front doors of the school.

From my classroom windows I could see two men getting out and making their way inside. One was a tall blonde, who looked like he came straight from the states, considering he stuck out like a sore thumb. The other was also tall, though didn’t look it next to his partner, but he definitely fit in more with the locals with his dark brown mop and matching mustache nestled above his plush lips. As they walked through the doors it was hard not to let my eyes linger down the second man’s loose button up that was tucked deliciously into jeans that fit him like a goddamn glove. I definitely didn’t miss the flash of a gun that was held snugly into the back of his pants.

I shook my head the second the door closed behind them, and made my way back to the front of my classroom. I felt ridiculous practically drooling over another man especially after everything that happened, but I just couldn’t help it. Just as I had my thoughts gathered there was a knock at the door. I turned my head and standing in the doorway was the second man I was trying to forget.

“Perdón por la interrupción, Señorita.” (Sorry for the interruption). The mustache was even more impressive up close, as were his lips, and his deep chocolate eyes that I felt could see right through me.

“Lo siento, no hablo español,” I muttered. (I’m sorry, I don’t speak Spanish). I was used to the phrase by now, even though I had picked up some of the language by now I certainly wasn’t anywhere near fluent. But even with this practiced sentence I felt as though my tongue was too thick to wrap around the letters, especially after watching the way his lips formed around each word. My knees felt weak, and not just because of the badge he held in his hand.

“Of course, my apologies,” he said, his voice smooth like hard liquor, with a hint of smoke and gravel, I was almost waiting for the bite. He held up his badge so I could see he was official. “Agent Javier Peña, DEA.”

I felt a weight I didn’t know I was carrying melt off of my shoulders. Drug Enforcement, which meant he wasn’t here for me. At least not in the way I was worried about.

“I’m wondering if you could confirm whether a certain student is in your classroom,” he spoke so gently I felt comforted, but I wasn’t going to give in.

I shook my head. “I’m sorry, sir, but I can’t give that information away.”

He smiled and leaned against the doorway, bringing his head down closer to me. At the nearly intimate movement I could feel a heat creeping up my chest that I knew would blossom into a blush. He knew what he was doing.

“Please, Miss, call me Javi.” I was almost expecting a wink to punctuate his sentence.

“Well, Agent,” I bit back, “I cannot give any information about these students to anybody who isn’t their caregivers.”

I didn’t want to be on this guy's bad side, but I also wanted to keep both the children safe and my job. They weren’t just pawns in the ugly game their parents and government were playing. It was rare that my students had a voice speaking up for them, an advocate for them. When I signed up for the job I was signing up to be just that.

He nodded and dragged his eyes down my body before snapping back up. His jaw was working with frustration over my refusal to back down, but he finally stood back up to his full height.

“Alright then,” he spoke firmly, but still gentle enough that I knew he was more frustrated than angry. “Have a good day.”

He turned to walk away but not before pausing and reaching into his pocket. In between his fingers was a thick card, which he then held out to me. I took the card with his full name stamped along the top, and what I assumed was his number printed along the middle. Even though I had grabbed onto the card he still held it firmly in his fingers, causing me to look up and once again be lost in his dark eyes.

“If you need anything, ever, please do not hesitate to call.”

I bit my lip and nodded. I didn’t miss the way his eyes left mine for a split second to glance at my lips before returning. He nodded back and left. I finally took a deep breath, feeling the stretch of my lungs inflating fully for the first time since I laid eyes on the man.

I returned to my desk and sat down to finish up marking while the remaining students continued their steady chatter while they awaited their parents. The card felt heavy in my hands, but I knew it wasn’t because of the actual weight of the paper. I reached over to the garbage can but hesitated, wondering if it really was the smartest idea to throw away what might be my one lifeline. Almost as if I could sense his eyes on me I looked out the window and saw him watching my classroom before climbing into the passenger seat of his vehicle. With that last glance of Agent Javier Peña I decided better and took out my wallet. I folded his card up as small as I could and tucked it away. I hoped I would never have to call that number, but something told me I couldn’t get rid of it yet.

That evening as I was leaving work I realized I didn’t have a lot of groceries at home. Unfortunately that meant I had to stop at the market, even though it was later than I had wanted. I took too long marking and ended up doing some more stuff around the classroom than I usually get the time to do, but that meant I got carried away. By the time I left there was only one other car in the parking lot other than mine. Everyone else had gone home, I assumed the other car belonged to one of the cleaning staff.

The market was pretty empty, only a few other shoppers moved around with glazed over eyes clearly exhausted from their workday. I absentmindedly threw ingredients into my cart that were easy to prepare quickly that night. I was too exhausted to even think about putting effort into a full meal, grateful that at least the weekend was in a few days.

All of a sudden a cart bumped against mine. I went to apologize even though it wasn’t my fault, but the words died in my throat when I saw who the person was.

“Hola.” The father of one of my students, Luis, the one in the cartel, stood barricading my cart against the shelves in the aisle. His smile was slimy, almost oozing against his face. I didn’t trust him one bit.

“Hi, sorry, I didn’t see you there,” I said, flustered. I tried to move back to get away but he stepped forward with me. The hair on the back of my neck stood up.

“Where do you think you’re going?” His smile grew bigger, taunting.

I shook my head and stepped away from my cart. He stepped to the side of his and pulled back his shirt enough to reveal a gun nestled into the front of his jeans. My hands started to tremble and I found I couldn’t focus on anything but the hint of metal in front of me. He nodded his head toward the exit, and I found myself following him without a second thought, leaving my cart abandoned in the aisle.

He led me out to a car in the parking lot that I recognized immediately as the one that had been at the school when I left. I mentally kicked myself for not recognizing it before, but it was too common of a car to have pinpointed exactly who the owner was, especially since I hadn’t seen anyone inside of it.

I was shoved into the backseat before I had time to think about what was going to happen to me. Luis slid into the driver's seat and took off, tires squealing against the road and into the night. I sat up and tried to get my wits about me, but the sound of a gun cocking drew my attention back to the driver.

“Keep your head down and your mouth shut, mi amor,” he spoke harshly, the nickname making my stomach turn. “Eres toda mía.” (You’re all mine)

I did as I was told, but considered whether getting shot would really be the worst thing, especially compared to whatever he had in store for me. Before I could come to a final decision the car lurched onto a dirt road, away from any street lights or other cars. We were truly going to be alone.

Tears sprang to my eyes but I refused to let him see me cry. It was obvious I was helpless and doomed to whatever fate he had in store for me, but I wouldn’t let him see any amount of weakness. I would become a fortress if I could not fight.

The car finally came to a stop and Luis jumped out, running to get to my door. He threw it open and wrenched my arm out, pulling the rest of me to the ground. My skin stung where it made contact with the rough surface, but he had pulled me to my feet before I could think about it any further.

Before us laid a house that was not modest in the slightest. I had to wonder who it belonged to, considering he would probably wear nicer clothes if he could afford a mansion.

“Vamos mi amor,” he snarled, still tugging me along by my wrist, his grip bruising.

My heart was beating in my ears and I couldn’t feel my legs as they carried me closer and closer to the large wooden doors ahead of us. When we got there Luis pushed the doors open with a bang, startling the men behind them. They turned to us, raising their guns before sighing and lowering them once more.

“Oh, Luis, hija de puta,” one of the men said. (Son of a bitch/whore).

Another stepped over and looked at me. I struggled to keep my head held high under his examination and Luis' powerful grip.

“El Patrón no le gustarà está,” he snarled. (The Boss won’t like this.) “¿Dónde encontraste éste?” (Where did you find this one?)

Luis gripped my arm even tighter, in a punishing amount of strength.

“¿Por qué?¿Estás celoso?” He sneered and pulled me off to the side, toward an open door leading into a dark room. (Why? Are you jealous?)

In the middle of the room was a small bed that clearly had only been used for what I was assuming he wanted to do with me. He threw me onto it, the mattress so thin I could feel the springs under my body, and then he slammed the door. I could no longer hear anybody on the other side.

“Finally, it’s just you and me,” he nearly slurred. His accent was thick as he punched out each word. He climbed onto the bed and over me, pinning my wrists above my head. My nose wrinkled automatically as his pungent smell of body odour and bad breath invaded my senses. “Do you know how bad I’ve wanted this? To touch these curves?”

I was surprised by how strong he was as he held my wrists in one hand and stroked his other hand over my waist. I twisted my body, trying to get away but his hold was like iron.

“You don’t get to get away, I’ve worked hard for this,” he growled and slapped my cheek causing my head to turn sharply toward the thin pillow it rested on. I gasped in shock, my body suddenly going pliant. “Stay still, puta!”

The next thing I heard was the drag of his zipper as a tear slid down my cheek, and then the door busted open causing us both to jump. A gunshot rang through my ears before I felt a thick, warm liquid drip onto my face. My eyes had squeezed shut and refused to open while my whole body shook in fear.

I felt lighter once the body that had been pinning me down had dropped to the side, then onto the floor with a wet smack. I couldn’t stop shaking even then, still not opening my eyes. My breaths were ragged, ripping through my throat and getting caught in choked sobs that I couldn’t hold back any longer.

A hand landed gentle and warm on my cheek.

“Abre los ojos. Open your eyes.” The voice that spoke was unfamiliar, and surprisingly gentle. I obeyed and immediately felt a new flood of fear. I recognized the man, the monster, that knelt beside me stroking my cheek.

Pablo Escobar.

I remember seeing pictures of him in the paper and on my television before moving to Bogotà, and then seeing his face on almost everything else after. Then, he was right in front of my face.

I scrambled to the edge of the bed, trying to put distance between us, ignoring the dead body that was still lying on the floor.

“No hay que tener miedo,” his voice was rough, and rumbled through the room.

“He says there’s no need to be afraid,” another voice, higher and not as threatening, came from the corner of the room. One of the men who had been standing by the front door was still holding his gun, keeping his eyes on Pablo.

Pablo smiled at me, but I didn’t believe him. There were many reasons to be afraid, one of them was still warm and lying on the floor.

“Siento que este idiota te haya traído aquí,” he said looking in the direction of Luis.

“He’s sorry this idiot brought you here,” his translator said.

“¿Que hago contigo?” He looked at me once more, almost waiting for my reply to his question. (What do I do with you?)

I furrowed my brows and looked to the man in the corner.

“He’s unsure about what to do. Luis didn’t follow protocol. One of our lookouts could see that you were in the backseat without a blindfold, meaning you know where this place is.” He took a step toward me, his gun still held tightly. “You’re a liability.”

I shook my head frantically. “N-no I promise I won’t tell anybody, I didn’t really see much. I was too scared and it’s nighttime and I’m new here.” I could feel myself growing more and more hysterical.

Pablo reached down to the floor and lifted up my purse. It must have fallen when I was pushed onto the bed but I hadn’t even noticed. He handed it over to me.

“I heard you’re a good teacher,” he said, hesitating over a few words.

I nodded.

“Tal vez hay un uso para usted después de todo,” he smiled.

(Perhaps there’s a use for you after all.)

#javier pena fanfiction #javier pena x reader #javi pena x reader #javier peña #javier pena x plus size reader #plus size reader

[waywardimpalawriter]

“Kissing me breaks the promise… remember?" with Javier and can I please have a happy ending, I know it's angst prompts but.... :D Thank you!

Crazy Love

Pairing: Javier Peña x Plus Size Female Reader

Characters: Javier Peña, Steve Murphy, mentions Connie Murphy

Setting: After season one episode 7 ‘You will cry tears of blood’, five months after the events in ‘Heels’,

Rating: M (Mature), E (Explicit), NSFW, 18+ only please

Warnings: mentions of gun violence, almost killing a child, self hatred, smut, unprotected sex, Angry Javier (yes he needs a warning), angst, slight fluff at the end,

Summary: One slip up, reacting too quickly he could’ve ended the life of one way too young to fight the wars of old men. Thoughts filled with darkness, what if’s and self degradation. Wanting to loose himself in the only way he knows. To find because of you he can brave the dawn and the coming war.

Word count: 5,985 (with lyrics)

Notes: Thank you so much for the request sweetie, @autumnleaves1991-blog I hope you enjoy. Prompt in bold. The song used is ‘Crazy Love’ written by Van Morrison and preformed by various artists. This also a sequel to “Heel’s part 1” written some months back.

Tag List:

Forever’s: @chickensarentcheap @jedi-mando

Knuckles white with the grip he’s got on the steer wheel, eyes darting between the thin packed streets and Murphy with the baby in his arms. “What about the kid? Any ideas where to take her?”

Missing the shrug, with his eyes back on the road, “For now I’ll take her with us.” Smirk twitching his dark blond mustache with the look Javier pins him with at a stop light. “Don’t worry Javi she ain’t gonna stay with you. Poor darlin can’t live on whiskey and cigarettes. Though the parade of women might slow with her at your apartment.”

“There’s no parade jackass,” trying to focus on the road ahead and off what almost occurred three hours ago.

Subtle tick to his jaw knowing something’s bothering his partner about what went down. More to the point of how it went to shit and letting two high ranking Sicario slip through their fingers. “Wanna spill what’s eaten at you?”

“No just take care of the kid don’t need you play shrink in my head,” pulling up to the embassy, Javier kills the engine turning fully to look at Steve. “Care to share your explanation to Noonan or will you wing it?”

Shrugging Steve glances down into her sleepy eyes trying to figure out just what he’ll say. More importantly what he’s going to tell Connie. “I’m not,” looking back over at Peña seeing a raised brow. “I’ll take her home to Connie, figure out this shit as we go.”

“I’m sure Y/N would babysit,” mentioning you name cut deeply as the last month he’s put distance between the two of you. Continuing the relationship based solely on your sexual needs instead of the feeling he keeps buried.

“Doubtful, she’s working on transferring out. Packing I’m sure takes her time up right now,” seeing the scowling confusion drawing his brows down. “You knew she asked for a transfer right?”

“When?” Curses fill his mind. Directed fully at himself for letting the situation spiral out of control to the point you’ve become that notch on his bed post. Telling himself he’s going to let you go but never finding the courage to actually cut the strings. “She never mentioned taking a transfer. ”

The nights spent together you never mentioned a transfer. But then words rarely left either of your lips that’s not in passionate pleas wanting more or demands for completion. Conversations the first to go in the crumbling relationship, embraces followed not long after and the final straw added a month and a half ago. No kisses on the mouth anyway a promise you made him invoke to separate the past pleasures from the present stalemate.

Revisiting those thoughts often, Javier understood why you made the decision. One he hated but respected. Wondering most nights why you still let him inside your soft plush body instead of putting up a wall between the two of you. Shoving him out of your life fully. But then the transfer you didn’t speak of talked louder than any uttered words could.

“Two weeks ago, something about returning back to the States. Damn shame Y/N’s a fucking amazing secretary even better person. Why’d you go fuck things up for us both?” Wanting to knock some sense into Javier but a part of Steve understood the other man’s reasons for pushing you away. “Just let her go man this job she’s not fit nor can put up with the stress. I know I pushed at first but whatever you did to shover her away it’s for the best.”

“She’s a lot stronger than you know,” said more to himself than Steve. Other mans words hitting deeper than Javier would say, his fingers tightening around the leather steering wheel. “You don’t know shit Murphy.”

“I know a month ago things changed between the two of you.” Switching the baby to his other arm cradling her close to his chest. “Whatever happened she become withdrawn, stopped smiling as much,” piercing him with a hard stare. “Reverting back to the woman I first met when coming Bogota.” Glancing out the windshield Steve drag a hand over his face exasperated sigh leaving his lips. “ piece of advice either fess up explain what’s eaten at you or let her go.”

Selfishness claws at his mind wanting to keep you from leaving. From getting away not only from Columbia it’s self but from him. The realistic half needing you safe a world removed from the war starting to build back up. This afternoon’s events flash through his mind of how he almost killed a kid. A fucking kid who tried to protect the Sicario scum he chased and cornered. Would’ve had him had the kid not pulled a gun on him. The decision not to pull the trigger an easy one this time. But what about the next? Making him no better than the men he chases if he decided to take the shot so easily. Affirming those thoughts to let you go for your greater good and health.

“Javi?” Snapping fingers to gain his attention. “Deep in thought or just swimming the shallow waters?”

Scowl taking up home over his features, “Don’t worry about it doesn’t concern you.”

“Fuck you say, she’s my friend to Javi.” Shaking his blond head wondering how much pushing it’ll take before Peña would break. “Besides I think Connie has a good chance at kicking your ass if you do anymore damaged. She’s wanted to get her hooks into you for a while now.”

Almost chuckling at those words though it’s mirthless and self deprecating. “She’s next in line,” tossing the words out while starting the Jeep. Silence reigns on the drive over to their apartment, pulling up to the curb and letting Steve out.

Who pauses in the open door, “Heading to Y/N’s? Or back to the Embassy?”

“Paperwork,” impatiently waiting for Steve to shut the door.

Eager for some peace and time to think. He sees you standing in the doorway arms crossed under your generous breasts. For once actually studying your features taking in the fact you look somber, dressed in well loved jeans and baggy T-shirt. No makeup, though Javi told you a thousand times how beautiful you look without all those cosmetics painted on your face. Heart kicking up at the way your staring at him. Barely seen with you so far away but he knows there’s a softness shining in your eyes. Emotions he’s never tried to decipher in other women till you. Thoughts now run into each other, fears chasing after wanting so much but feeling undeserving.

Soft chuckle echos around the Jeep’s cabin making Javi glance at Steve, “Time better served explaining than useless paperwork.” Looking over his shoulder to find you gone, “Before it’s to late and she’s gone.” Door slamming shut, Steve leans in through the open window with a meaningful expression on his handsome face. Patting the inside slight nod of his blond head before turning to go inside leaving Javier with to many thoughts.

Pulling away from the curb happening to glance back towards the apartments catching you standing at the window. Hand pressed to the glass unreadable look on your face one he’s sure shows signs of displeasure and anger. With a blink your silhouette disappears heart clenching at the thought he’s just imagined you standing there. Another curse flies from his lip, palm forcefully slamming down on the steering column doing nothing to temper the anger boiling inside his mind. Instead Javier guns the engine taking off at a high rate of speed receiving numerous honks in irritated warning.

*************************

Letting the curtain fall back in place wild thumping of your heart pulsing out a rhythm that aches with every pound. Partly hating yourself for getting involved with a man incapable of having any kind of relationship other than sexual. Asking yourself why you keep letting him back into your bed, into your heart knowing it’ll just break in the end. Only one answer comes to mind and you push it firmly back into the dark abyss. Focusing on what you needed to done. Having struggled for the last two months with the decision to finally put in for a transfer home, away from Columbia and Javier Peña. Never an easy choice especially when you’ve fallen in love with a man who would never love you back.

Heavy knocking makes you jump in spot leaning against the wall by the window. Hand coming to rest against the quickly beating organ threatening to thump right outta your chest. Taking a breath trying to calm down from the freight you take small steps to eat up the distance towards the door. Another round of pounding has a scowl appearing wondering who would beat your door down at this time of evening.

“Hold your horses I’m comin’ already,” raising you voice loud enough to at least pause the noise.

Grasping the doorknob right when, “Hermosa,” his voice pulls your hand back almost as if the knob burned you with that very endearment. “Open up you can’t hide I know your there.”

“Go away Javier I’m not in the mood,” arms crossed glaring at the door. Pivoting on bare feet to track towards the kitchen going back to sorting through what your keeping and leaving behind. Freezing in place the unmistakeable sound of a key sliding into lock. Cursing the fact you never asked for the spare back and giving him one in the first place. Try as you might to make your feet move instead there rooted in spot when the door opens. “I didn't invite you in Javi turn your ass around and leave.”

Breath escaping quickly, eyes narrowing after searching the apartment he’s spent the last months in. Catching sight of half filled boxes, newspaper scattered over the coffee table, before landing on your furious features. Hands gripping wide hips, soft chin jutted out in annoyance while eyes spit anger burying the true feelings deep. “It’s true?”

“Why do you care?” Countering his words biting the inside of your cheek to keep tears from sliding coldly down your cooling skin. “Leave Javier,” exasperated and tired just wanting to move on, putting the relationship in the past.

Not two steps away his warm gun callused hand incloses around your wrist tugging and turning your plush body around to face him. “Not till you answer me.”

“We don’t talk about feelings remember Peña, your rules,” yanking your wrist free glare firmly in place.

Flinching at the harsh tone eyes scorching him with there intensity, his own somber and filled with regret. Deserving of those very words no matter how much they hurt. He moves forward for you to take one back reaching to grasp both shoulders. Taking another step out of his reach slow two step pattern finds your back pressed against the bar counter. Reminiscent of the first time you made love all those months ago. Except this time you’d stand strong push him away and not fall prey to those warm russet eyes filled with so many indescribable emotions.

“Stupid rule I never should’ve put in our relationship,” three feet of space between the two of you. Both chests heaving breaths eyes locked and searching. His eyes close drawing in your familiar scent letting it wash all the days stress clean for a single moment in time. Ear’s picking up the quick beating of your heart wishing as his eyes open a smile would bloom over those kissably soft lips.

“But you did and there’s no taking it back now,” firm stance starting to crumble under the weight of emotions filtering through his dark eyes.

Half way to reaching out his hands drop back to fist at his sides, “I’m sorry hermosa I didn’t mean…” unsure how to fix what’s broken. Never good at speaking his feelings even when the need presents its self.

I can hear her heart beat for a thousand miles

And the heavens open every time she smiles

And when I come to her that's where I belong

Yet I'm running to her like a river's song

“What’d want from me Javier?” Pleading tone arms crossed to close your body off. Putting up a defense against the one man who’s managed to crumble every wall surround your heart. To starve off the bubbling emotions threatening to spill over and consume you.

Closing the small gap, callused hands cup both cheeks, fingers spread from apples to jawlines. Brushing his thumbs under your eyes his own pleading and soft ‘the puppy’ look you nicknamed it two weeks into the relationship. “To kiss you.”

Swallowing harshly, “Kissing me breaks the promise… remember?" Willing your body not to react, not to turn and place kisses to his palm. Nuzzling the warmth drawing peace from his comforting touch. “We made rules you know how I feel about kissing Javi.”

Almost two months ago things started to fall apart. Always asking yourself why you still let him into your bed and body. Part of you knowing the space carved Javier hole in your heart will never close. Not even denying the both of you those intimate kisses could change the fact he’s wormed his way through defenses long held too fall in love with your DEA agent.

“I know mi amor,” sliding one hand down from your face to wrap his arm around your thick waist. Pulling you flush into his embrace and against his body. Turning the both of you so it’s his back pressed into the counter. Savoring the softness wishing you’d hold him. Run your fingers through his hair and chase away the stress currently resurfacing with your tense posture. “I don’t want you to leave.” No truer words spoken ones that cut his very soul with the implications of what could happen if he didn’t take Steve’s advice.

Agony rips a new hole in your heart at his words, at the endearment dripping from those sinful lips. “You don’t mean that.” Eyes close to keep from staring into russet browns. Trying not to give in and foolishly hope he means what he speaks.

“I do hermosa,” eyes popping open at the barest brush of his chapped lips against yours, widen orbs find his shut, brow furrowed. “I don’t want to loose you.”

“Javier,” breathlessly whispering his name. The intensity of Javi’s declaration scares you not wanting to believe for a second his words ring true. Not when so many broken promises lay at your feet. Yet, if there’s one thing you know about Javier Peña he’s honest, never lying to you about what he wanted. Holding back sure, not letting you in those tightly held defenses of his own fuck yes, but lie to you never. Those thoughts make others chase after. Ones that scare you into thinking you’ve made a huge mistake by asking for the transfer. Could you leave his man who holds your heart? Walk away from a relationship that’s possibly just hitting a rough patch? So engrossed in those thoughts you don’t realize he’s tipping your chin up to angle your head in the prefect position to slot his mouth over yours.

Javier’s restraint having snapped with his name slipping from your bitten lips, wanting to meld the two of you together in the only way he knows how. Showing you with his body what his words couldn’t express. Javier captures your mouth in a bruising kiss filled with demands. Teeth biting at your lips, dragging plump bottom in to abuse with nibbles and soothing over with his tongue. Harsh gasp blown from your mouth giving him access to the warm cavern. Drinking from your well, tasting your flavor on his tongue always returning for more. Tangling together as his arm tightens around your soft waist.

Garnering a moan of need from deep within your chest. Attacking his mouth with your own, fingers coming into play by carding through those thick mahogany strands tugging harshly. Receiving a growl in return that vibrates down to your very core clit throbbing in response to his rough actions.

Mouths parting to gather air, “I need you hermosa please,” desperation coloring his tone foreheads resting together. The hand still cupping your cheek slides around to gently cup the back of your head. “I need…” swallowing hard, fighting to keep from taking you hard and fast right there. Burying the fear and pain, the anger and worry into your soft gentle body. Letting you sooth the demons threatening to consume his soul. But he couldn’t, promising to never show that side of himself to you.

Those thoughts in mind Javier moves in to kiss you only to chase your mouth till you place fingers over his searching lips. Seeing a spark of need in he eyes that’s closed away before fully blooming. Leading you to remember a conversation the two of you had at the on set of your relationship. Knowing what he needed and how, you step back watching his features fall with his arms to the side.

Only to have confusion replace the crestfallen expression as you tug the t-shirt up and off your body. Standing in just your panties and jeans, “I told you a long time ago Javier I’m not made of glass this body…” hands gliding up from your waist to soft tummy and generous breasts. “Won’t break if your rough with me.” Heat sparking in eyes that will him to listen, give in and take you. “If I’m staying and we work this out you’ll have to let me in.”

Each word hits him hard square in the heart, “I don’t want to hurt you cariño.”

“You already have Javier,” head dropping you go to tug your shirt back on. Only to have it ripped from your hand and tossed somewhere unseen. That soft gasp making his heart beat triple time. Strong arms wrap around your body to bring you back into his warmth. “Fix what you broke.”

There’s no gentleness to the possessive kiss Javier captures your mouth with. Large warm hands grip your plush ass to press into your tummy the thick ridge of his jeans covered erection. Low growl slipping passed parted gasping lips that angle for the right spot to draw those whimpers and moans he can never get enough of. Separating long enough to have you rip his tan button up open, little plastic disks pinging off the wall and tiled floor. Scoring your short nails over his soft tummy, toying with the button of his jeans.

“Fuck,” hissing through kiss swollen lips that attack your neck with bitting teeth. Wanting to mark each inch of you in reminder to himself of who you derive your pleasure from. “Do that again,” demanding cadence gets a soft smirk to spread over your bitten lips.

Keeping your eyes lock, breath existing quickly because of the passionate kiss. Short nails rake up his chest and leave little red lines behind. Detouring to pinch his pebbled tight nipples receiving another low growl against the skin of your collarbone. Where his mouth sucks a purpling mark laving his tongue over the bruising skin. Enjoying the shutter he feels race down your spine.

Pushing the shirt from his shoulders Javier raises his head to stare into your desire darken eyes. “Fuck me Javier till I can’t walk tomorrow.”

Simple words ignite a passion and deep seated need inside his body to claim and wreak you. Clothing becomes nothing more than obstacles in the way of having naked skin against his own. The two of your fumbling with buttons and zippers. His parting on a sigh of relief as you push the fabric to pool around his ankles. Nimble fingers brushing through course little hairs. Leading your hand to wrap around his shaft. Thick girth barely covered by your hand that you pump along heated velvet skin.

Smirking at the groaning string of Spanish curses falling from his lips. Only replaced by the pout, when he brushes your hand away. Mouth still just inches from yours brushing taking another sip from your lips. Drowning in the taste of your mouth, the feel of your plump lips against his. Devouring the pout and only breaking to whisper, “Later princesa.” Toeing off boots and soak covered feet pressing out of jeans, naked as on his born day for your eyes to devour.

Becoming insnared with his beauty far too long for Javier’s liking. Lips licked slowly watching the bob of his jutting cock. Mouth watering in want of a taste. Quick breaths expanded his soft covered muscular chest your hands itch to dust over. His handsomeness distracting you to the point a squeal issues from the back of your throat when he pulls you by the belt loops towards the couch. Skilled fingers making quick work of getting your jeans undone warm palms sliding the fabric down your body.

Javier drops back into the couch bringing you between his spread knees and placing kisses to your tummy. Nuzzling the underside of your breasts. Looking up to ensnare your vision with his own desire filled gaze. Strong arms holding you in place while eyes close, nose rubbing into your soft scantly skin resting his head on your tummy. Hands coming up to card through his hair gently this time tugging the locks and wrapping his shoulders with your arms. Emotions clogging your throat burning with the need to release the tears of mixed feelings.

Moaning head tossing back when his warm tongue peeking out to teasing the taut nipples his hands tug your panties down. Becoming impatient and ripping the thin cotton from your body. Making you gasp and look down into those desire blacken eyes you choose happily to drown in. “You’ll…” swallowing your words on a moan as those thick skilled fingers draw through your folds. Tapping your clit several times and retreating to slide inside your clinching walls.

She give me love, love, love, love, crazy love

She give me love, love, love, love, crazy love

She's got a fine sense of humor when I'm feeling low down

And when I come to her when the sun goes down

Take away my trouble, take away my grief

Take away my heartache, in the night like a thief

“I’ll buy you more cariño and go with you to help pick out certain ones,” giving you a cheeky wink. Groaning with the feel of slick coating his fingers, smirk in place when your hands brace on his shoulders to keep from tipping over into his arms. Pulling his fingers out to suck them clean making sure your watching his every move. The resounding whimper he draws out brings the same smug grin too tug at his lips. Gripping the back of your thick thighs to spread your stance and slot his own knees between.

Pulling you down against him knees on either side of his thighs. Hiss issued at the contact of your dripping folds coating his shaft trapped between your bodies. Rolling hips to tease your own hands gripping the back of the couch to brace yourself while raising up. Deep moan breaks from your chest when Javier draws the fat cock head through your folds. Circling your clit as your hips match the movements. Waiting till he’s notched himself at your entrance before slamming down against him.

Head tossing back at the stretch and burn of him splitting you open gasps of delight echo and play with the groans from Javier. Who grips your hips, holding you against him for a time face buried in your chest. Hot mouth searching out blindly latching onto your right nipple to bite down just hard enough to make your quivering channel squeeze him tightly.

“Fuck,” single word mumbled against your skin. When you start to move setting a quick pace that’s hard and demanding. Head dropping back between your gripping hands. String of curses and praise leave his lips. “Just like that hermosa, so fucking wet for me,” grunting into your mouth that came to fuss to his. Sharing breaths while you move against his body.

Taking possession of his pleasure with a kiss that’s deep and hungry. Devouring the sounds he makes with each quick roll of your hips. Pressing your generous breasts against the hard plains of his chest, nipples brushing his skin as his own hands grip your thick soft waist. Leaving behind bruises with how tightly he holds you. One hand gliding over sweat slicked skin to cup a full ass cheek giving a squeeze before landing a hard slap.

Movements falter with the stinging pleasure coursing through your veins, “Javi.” Kiss breaking breathlessly to catch his eyes. Seeing the indecision clearly written, you nod leaning to brushing your lips over his ear, “Again please.”

Mouth buries against the spot where shoulder and neck meet, planting his feet firmly to thrust into your welcoming cunt quicker. Letting a moment pass till he lands another smack to the other ass cheek. Soothing the pain with his warm palm, “Like that princesa?” Drawing his nose over the sweaty expanse of his throat tossed back on a gasp. Bearing your neck to his hungry gaze and mouth.

Taking advantage to bite and suck, thick mustache abrading your skin in the most delicious of ways. Sending tingles to dance across your skin making your clit throb with each hard pound of his cock deep inside your quivering walls. Wrapping your arms around his shoulders for leverage as your knees sink into the couch and you bounce on Javier’s cock. Thick thighs shaking as orgasm builds quicker than you thought possible.

“Yes,” whimpering out in answer. Both hands cup your ass helping you move against him. Sweat slicked shoulders make for a tough grip movements becoming choppy and sloppy. Low whine bubbles from the back of your throat needing more but unsure how to say.

Javier picks up on the destress, pulling out making the whine lengthen. “Lay back on the couch for me hermosa,” seeing the confusion in your gaze. Javi tugs you to sit in the corner of the couch, pulling till your almost flat and he crawls between those thick thighs he wants wrapped around his waist.

Sliding back inside of you on a groan, “Still so tight for me princesa I could stay buried in your pretty pussy forever never growing tired of having your surround me.”

“Javi,” heat flares across your body at his words, face buried in your palms. Only to have them pulled and placed on his chest. Shocked yet pleased with his sentiments, the way he growls out the words setting off tingles dancing down your spine.

Gasping when he pulls out resting just the tip before surging back angling to hit that little spot only he’s managed to discover inside you. Right leg draped over his hip left dangling off the couch as your hands scrap and grope at his shoulders. Strong arms press on either side of you holding himself up while rocking his hips into yours. Setting a fast and hard pace that has you gasping, moans of incoherent words tumble from your mouth that hangs open trying to gather breath.

Watching with hooded eyes, drinking in the way you look, the passion morphing your features never wanting to let you go. To always see you in the throws of pleasure he delivers to your body. Praying to whoever will listen that you’ll stay. Those thoughts creating a fire inside his body that moves quicker.

Wanting to show you his feelings by repeatedly burying his cock deep inside your throbbing cunt. Loving your soft thick body with his mouth latching onto a breast. Nipping skin and taunt nipples, curling his tongue before biting down and switching to the twin. Feeling your nails score his back and shoulders only driving on his own pleasure.

Needing you to cum first though, Javier slides one hand between your slick bodies to caress your clit with tight circles of pressure. Smirking into your flesh when you gasp and squirm under him. His name breathlessly spoken to the heavens your back arching off the couch. “That’s my girl cum for me amor soak my cock.”

“Javier,” fingers card through his hair pulling his mouth back to yours. Tender and sweet nothing like the previous kisses as you pour your heart out to the man pounding you into the couch. Foreheads rest together, moans dripping from your lips brushing against his trying to hold back to draw out the pleasure. Afraid of the final moment he finds completion and walks out of your life maybe for good this time. “I love you,” unable to stop those three words from tumbling out. Orgasm slamming through your body with the hard thrusts of Javier’s hips. Crying out his name, arching against him breath stuck along with tears in your throat.

Swearing he heard things, Javier’s pace stuttered but his heart pounds quicker. Hips having a mind of their own as his body rushes to completion. Cumming harder than he’s ever in his life, filling your clinching walls with hot stick seed. Strength evaporated from his arms collapsing into your embrace. Burying his face in your neck, hot moist breath fanning out over your skin. Small after shocks roll through both your bodies garnering whimpers and moans from both of you.

Time, unsure of how much passes while you card fingers through his sweat slicked hair. Enjoying this moment, basking in the after glow of your love making while praying it’s not the end.

“Don’t leave,” words whispered into your skin so low there barely caught. Wondering if you’ve heard things your fingers pause watching on stuttering breath as Javier raises his head to stare into your eyes. Wondering if you meant what you said or just caught up in the pleasurable sex and let it out. It’s on the tip of his tongue to ask when you beat him to the punch.

“I… I…” words lost in the jumble of your mind unsure what to say. Fearful your passionate declaration went unheard or worse ignored.

Cupping your cheek surprised to find tears tracking down your cheek, “Don’t leave me Y/N please.”

Searching his bright russet eyes confused till you see what he’s really saying. Realization blooming across your mind your own hand coming up to embrace his cheek. Thumb swiping over the apple, “I’ll speak to Noonan.” Bringing his mouth down to yours for a soft sweet kiss.

“Do you really love me?” Foreheads resting together breath held, his eyes closed tightly fearing the answer.

Shocked he’s asking. Remembering the times you tried to get him to talk about his feelings becoming shut down pushing the conversation away or distracting you with kisses and sex. With the lengthening silence Javier dares to open his eyes catching the soft expression in yours that cracks his frozen heart.

“I wouldn’t say those words if I didn’t mean them Javi you know that,” continuing to brush your fingers over his stubbled jaw. Up into his soft sweaty hair to gently scratch his scalp knowing how much he enjoys when you do. Rewarded with a low purr from the back of his throat. “What happened today baby?”

Fear keeps him quiet for a moment till, “I almost killed a kid.” Lowering his stare to map your skin with his eyes adding the marks he left behind to his memory. Fear returning now that you’ve heard how much of a monster he’s turning into.

“Did you shoot?” There’s no accusations or incrimination, voice softly seeking a way to help sooth the demons you saw when he first arrived.

Carefully pulling from your warm depths and embrace to sit on the edge of the couch face buried in his hands. Missing the whimper at loosing his touch. You grab for the blanket draped over the back to cover yourself in self consciousness. Moving carefully to sit up and lean against his shoulder. Fingers carding through his hair slowly while placing the other around his waist. Waiting till he’s ready to start speaking not wanting to push.

She give me love, love, love, love, crazy love

She give me love, love, love, love, crazy love

Yes I need her in the daytime

Yes I need her in the night

Yes I want to throw my arms around her

Kiss her hug her kiss her hug her tight

Welcoming warmth enveloping his body that cleaves into you. Baritone rough with emotions, “No I couldn’t pull the tigger, didn’t want to shoot some kid who’s stupidly following the orders of a man who doesn’t care about him.”

“Listen to me Javi you’re not Escobar you’ll never have that narcissistic attitude.” Turning his face to look at you, brushing the stubble with your fingertips. “Yes you’ve done some questionable things for good reasons to take down this asshole who would gladly see all of Columbia burn just to get and keep what he wants.” Leaning in to brush your nose against his, “I couldn’t love a man who killed people for kicks Javier. That’s not what you do. You save people, protect them as best you can.”

Unworthiness filtering through his thoughts never expecting to find someone who loved him faults and all. Intertwining his fingers with the hand previously on his cheek bring the back to his lips to place a kiss. “I don’t deserve you hermosa,” swallowing harshly letting your hand go to stand. Unconcerned with his nakedness Javier stretches popping his back then looking down at you.

Worry etched in those beloved eyes that stare unblinkingly at the spot he just vacated. “Leaving now?” Biting off the words tears clouding your vision mistaking his declaration as rejection pulling the blanket tighter around your plush body.

Forefinger and thumb pinching the end of your soft chin raising your gaze to meet his, “Why would I leave when everything I want and love rests with you.”

“Javier?” Voice wobbling with unshed tears.

Pulling the blanket from your body taking in the curves and dips, the softness he’s itching to get his hands back on. But right now Javier brings the nearest hand to his lips, brushing the knuckles with his mouth mustache tickling your skin. Keeping your eyes locked as he tugs you up into his arms. “I’m serious Y/N I don’t deserve you but without you I’m a shell of a man,” bringing his free hand up to cup your cheek deep russet eyes burning with love staring into yours.

“What are you saying?” Fear coating the words, afraid it’s all a dream and you’ll wake without Javier beside you.

Drawing your mouth closer, strong arm wrapping around your thick waist, “I’m saying I love you Y/N and if you’ll have me I’m yours till you kick me out for driving you crazy.”

“You already do that Javi,” watery giggles escaping your lips that brush his twice. Reaching up to card fingers through the soft strands at the back of his head tugging just a little harder than normal. “Say it again.”

Grunting at the tugs sliding a hand down to cup a generous bare ass cheek to give a squeeze. “Drive you crazy.”

Just barely holding in the squeak, “No,” eyes rolling at his cheek. “You know what I mean Javier Peña.”

“I do,” slotting his mouth against yours stealing the breath from your lungs as he kisses you with a passion never felt before. Barely breaking to mumble those three simple words into your lips, “I love you.” Getting lost in your kiss while silently vowing to never let you go or break your heart.

And when I'm returning from so far away

She gives me some sweet lovin' brighten up my day

Yes it makes me righteous, yes it makes me feel whole

Yes it makes me mellow down in to my soul

#Request #Sequel to Heel's #Javier Peña x Plus Size Female Reader #Javier Peña x Plus Size Fem! Reader #Javier Peña x Plus Size F!Reader #Female Reader #Smut

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This blog is 18+ ONLY but you’ll find ** below for pieces that contain explicit smut. Enjoy!

Pedro Pascal Characters, My Beloveds:

Frankie ‘Catfish’ Morales Triple Frontier

The Alewife Soulmate AU

“Together” Universe (Frankie x female Reader x Benny Miller): Better Together** Taking Care Together Waking Up Together** Celebrating Together** Together for Christmas

Flyboy**

Full Moon Fury** (Spooktober 2022)

Better Than a Date** (Frankie x reader x Santiago Garcia)

“I have no idea what you just said to me.” (Santi x reader x Frankie microfic)

Three’s Company, pt 1** (Joel x reader x Frankie) Three’s Company, pt 2**

Hurry Home** (Frankie x reader x Santiago Garcia)

Frankie and Maggie Miller: Beach House Gone Fishin’

Marcus Pike The Mentalist

Ménage à Trois** (Marcus Pike x f!reader x modern!Oberyn Martell)

Sexus, Ars, Amor (Marcus Pike x f!reader x Ezra)

More Than Mistletoe** (Christmas fic!)

Starting Over

The Complete Idiot’s Guide to Dating Your Ex: Chapter 1 Chapter 2 Chapter 3** Chapter 4 Chapter 5 Chapter 6 Chapter 7** Chapter 8 Chapter 9 Epilogue

Mother Knows Best**

First Christmas**

Hummingbird Has Landed (soulmate au): Chapter 1 Chapter 2 Chapter 3 Chapter 4 Chapter 5 Chapter 6 Chapter 7 Chapter 8** Chapter 9** Chapter 10

I’m Yours: (on hiatus) Prologue: Mondays Suck Chapter 1: Two Terrible Ideas Chapter 2: More Evil Than Genius

Agent Whiskey Kingsman: Golden Circle

A Second Chance at Love** A Second Chance at Love pt 2** A Second Chance at Life** (Jack Daniels x reader/Zach Wellison x f!OC)

Bad Moon Rising: pt 1** (Spooktober 2021) Bad Moon Rising: pt 2** (Spooktober 2021)

You, Me & Mexico**

Ghostly Touch** (Spooktober 2022)

Down the Rabbit Hole Soulmate AU

Win a Date with Javi G, pt 1 Win a Date with Javi G, pt 2**

New Year’s Surprise**

“Wait! Please don’t go!”/”There is no ‘us’.” (microfic) “Put me down!”/”Should we make it official?” (microfic, sequel to above)

A Night to Remember, part 1

Oberyn Martell Game of Thrones

Ménage à Trois** (Marcus Pike x f!reader x modern!Oberyn Martell)

From Dorne, with Love (modern!Oberyn x female reader) Part 1 Part 2 Part 3** Part 4** Part 5 Part 6 Epilogue

The Viper’s Bride soulmate au (Oberyn x reader x Ellaria x male OC) Chapter 1** Chapter 2** Chapter 3** (Explicit for violence) Chapter 4** Chapter 5** Chapter 6** Chapter 7** Chapter 8** Chapter 9** Chapter 10** Chapter 11 Chapter 12** Chapter 13 Chapter 14** Chapter 15 Chapter 16** Epilogue

“Put me down!” microfic

Javier Peña Narcos

The Meeting Place (Javier Peña x reader x Steve Murphy x Connie Murphy)

Broken Road 

“There is no us.” (microfic)

If You Were Mine, pt. 1 If You Were Mine, pt. 2**

Night of the Living Wish** (Spooktober 2023)

“Should we make it official?” (microfic)

Marcus Moreno We Can Be Heroes

Wish You Were Here Soulmate AU

The Date**

What are you doing here? (microfic)

What Happens in Vegas, part 1** What Happens in Vegas, part 2**

Ezra Prospect

Sexus, Ars, Amor (Marcus Pike x f!reader x Ezra)

Louder (microfic)

Dave York Equalizer 2

Table for Four** (Dave York x Carol York x f!reader x Quinn McKenna) Couch for Four 

Killer Writing Soulmate AU (Dave York x plus size reader)

“I don’t know how much longer I can do this.” (microfic)

Zach Wellison Brothers and Sisters

Once Upon a Time... (Zach Wellison x plus size reader)

A Second Chance at Life** (Jack Daniels x reader/Zach Wellison x f!OC)

Dieter Bravo The Bubble

You’re So Vain Soulmate AU

Surprising Reunions, pt 1** (Joel x Dieter x reader) Surprising Reunions, pt 2**

Bright Lights & Broken Dreams, pt 1** Bright Lights & Broken Dreams, pt 2** Bright Lights & Broken Dreams, pt 3**

Sweet Temptation**

Red Lipstick** (Spooktober 2023)

“I’m not getting you coffee, your order is ridiculous.” (microfic)

Pero Tovar The Great Wall

Sassenach and the Spaniard Soulmate AU: Chapter 1 Chapter 2** (E for references to assault) Chapter 3** (E for references to assault and violence) Chapter 4** Chapter 5** Chapter 6** Chapter 7 Chapter 8 Chapter 9** Chapter 10** (E for violence) Chapter 11 Chapter 12 Chapter 13** Chapter 14** Epilogue

“Does no one here know how to knock?” (microfic)

Max Phillips Bloodsucking Bastards

Close Encounters of the Toothy Kind** (Spooktober 2022)

Vampire Waltz Soulmate AU: Chapter 1 Chapter 2 Chapter 3 Chapter 4 Chapter 5 Chapter 6 Chapter 7 Chapter 8** Chapter 9 Chapter 10** (Explicit for violence) Chapter 11 Chapter 12** Chapter 13** Chapter 14 Chapter 15** Chapter 16 Chapter 17 Epilogue

Javi Gutierrez The Unbearable Weight of Massive Talent

Redbox Romance** (Spooktober 2022)

Win a Date with Javi G, pt 1 Win a Date with Javi G, pt 2**

The King’s Queen (Royalty AU): Chapter 1 Chapter 2 Chapter 3 Chapter 4 Chapter 5 Chapter 6 Chapter 7 Chapter 8** Chapter 9

“Wait! Please don’t leave!” (Regency au microfic)

“I’ll protect you.” (microfic)

Joel Miller The Last of Us

“For” Series: For Pleasure** For Her For Protection** For Valentine’s Day**

“I thought you loved forehead kisses.”/”Put me down.” (microfic)

Surprising Reunions, pt 1** (Joel x Dieter x reader) Surprising Reunions, pt 2** Three’s Company, pt 1** (Joel x reader x Frankie) Three’s Company, pt 2**

Next to Normal, pt 1** (Explicit for references to violence) Next to Normal, pt 2** Next to Normal, pt 3**  (Explicit for references to violence)

Detective Tim Rockford Merge Mansion

“You brought me flowers?” (microfic)

Private Dick**

“Wait! Please don’t leave!” (microfic) “I thought you loved forehead kisses.” (microfic, sequel to above)

Maxwell Lord Wonder Woman 1984

In the Heights, pt 1 In the Heights, pt 2**

Charlie Hunnam Characters, My Darlings:

Will ‘Ironhead’ Miller Triple Frontier

Necessary Arrangements (Royalty AU) - On Hiatus: Chapter 1 Chapter 2 Chapter 3 Chapter 4

Alan McMichael Crimson Peak

At First Sight

Boyd Holbrook Characters, My Sweets:

Steve Murphy Narcos

The Meeting Place (Javier Peña x reader x Steve Murphy x Connie Murphy)

Small Towns and Second Chances**

Quinn McKenna The Predator

Table for Four** (Dave York x Carol York x f!reader x Quinn McKenna) Couch for Four

Oscar Isaac Characters, My Dearests:

Santiago ‘Pope’ Garcia Triple Frontier

Summer Rose**

Better Than a Date** (Santi x reader x Frankie)

“I have no idea what you just said to me.” (Santi x reader x Frankie microfic)

Hurry Home** (Santi x reader x Frankie)

#pedro pascal #pedro pascal fanfic #pedro pascal fanfiction #pedro pascal character fanfiction #the mentalist #Marcus Pike #Marcus Pike x OC #triple frontier #Frankie Morales #Frankie Catfish Morales #Francisco Morales #Frankie Morales x OC #Frankie Catfish Morales x OC #Miller sister OC #brother!Benny #brother!Will #Jack Daniels #pedro pascal x reader #Agent Whiskey x Reader #Agent Whiskey #Kingsman Golden Circle #Kingsman: Golden Circle #Oberyn Martell #oberyn martell x reader #Marcus Pike x reader x modern!Oberyn #Marcus Pike x Oberyn Martell #Game of Thrones #Got fanfic #Narcos #Narcos fanfic

[just-here-for-the-moment]

Javier Peña x petite female reader size kink fic, Part 2

By popular demand, here’s Javier Peña’s size kink Part 2!

Part 1

Word Count: 2800+

Rating: Explicit, 18+ only

Outline: Javier Peña x “You” (petite cis/het female reader; “blank canvas”/no name/no use of “Y/N”)

Warnings: mature and vulgar language; a smattering of cop/suspect role play; some dom/sub elements and powerplay; SIZE KINK; praise kink (“good girl”); one instance of a ripped dress; vaginal fingering; oral sex/M receiving plus deepthroating/gagging but it’s not rough; oral sex/F receiving; protected P/V sex; Javier has a FILTHY mouth and he’s a little bit mean but then turns soft; some diminutive nicknames for Reader (“little lady”/”little girl”); Javier picking Reader up and carrying her; this is Part 2 of Javier talking dirty about his huge penis and how tiny you are (sorry/not sorry)

You kiss Javier deeply as he carries you down the hall, your legs wrapped tight around his waist. You’re dying to get him to take off his shirt, his jeans, to finish what he promised you. You wonder if you really will be able to fit all of him into your mouth. You’ve tried several times over the past few weeks, but you haven’t managed to take him all the way.

Javier tosses you onto his bed and before you can even lay back he’s reaching again to rip the rest of your buttons, more tiny pearl projectiles hitting the floor, the dress now torn all the way open. You don’t really care, the dress was inexpensive and it’ll be easy to replace, but you decide to throw it back in his face as part of your game.

You scowl up at him and set your jaw. “You owe me a new dress, Agent.”

Javier steps back, looking at you spread out on his bed as he rubs one big hand over his chin. His eyes scan you from your face down your body, drinking in the sight of your lacy bra and panties before trailing back up to meet your gaze. He looks like he’s trying to decide what to do with you, and it makes you want to rub your thighs together, quell the sudden ache and throbbing in your clit.

Javi suddenly leans down over you, crowding into your space as he braces himself above you. The scent of his cologne and most recent cigarette send your head reeling, desire spinning in your chest and making it hard to breathe. He squints at you and then murmurs low, his gravelly voice making more butterflies appear in your gut.

“I don’t think you’re in a position to demand things, little lady. I think you ought to be a bit nicer to me, and we’ll see what happens.” He dips his head low and nudges your chin up with his nose, laying kisses to your hot skin.

You gasp and keen, “I’ll be good.”

“Will you?” He keeps kissing you, down to your collarbone.

“Or are you going to be trouble?” ...down to your breasts.

“Because if you’re going to cause problems...” He kisses down your stomach and your hips.

“We can just stop right here,” He bites your mound gently through the lace of your panties.

“...and you can walk home in your ruined dress. And if you look like that? Like a little package of trouble? I bet some big, mean man will come and carry you off.”

You pant heavily and even though you know the threat is just part of the game, he’s got your heart racing. Javier is filthy and he’s playing you so well.

He licks at your clit through the lace. “Are you gonna cause me any trouble, little girl?”

You whisper, high and anxious, “No, I’ll be good for you. I promise.”

Javier leans back over you and kisses you tenderly. “I know you will. You’re always so good for me, trying to fit my cock into that pretty little mouth of yours. You try so hard, baby.”

You pout and nod at him with big eyes. “I’ll be good.”

Javier nods at you. “Good girl.”

He stands up and pulls you to a sitting position, then unzips his jeans to pull his erection out. You bite your lip and feel more slick settle into the crotch of your undies. Javier cups your chin and you open eagerly to lick around his head, wetting him as you bring your hands up to work the base of his cock. The sight of your petite hand barely wrapping all the way around gets you even wetter.

Javier leans into it, putting both hands on his hips and watching you intently as you work him from the tip as far down as you can, your eyes closed as you feel him heavy on your tongue, filling your whole mouth with his thickness. You savor the way his skin tastes, the little hint of salt and the smell of his detergent. His breathing gets heavier.

“That’s my good girl.” His voice is low and raspy. “God, your lips look so good wrapped around my cock. Can’t believe you can take me like this.”

You moan around him and flutter your eyes open to try to gaze up at him. He’s looking at you and clenching his jaw. Aroused. Intense. Focused only on you.

You tighten your lips around him, making your mouth look even smaller, like it’s some kind of effort to take him like this instead of your favorite thing to do. He puffs his chest at the sight of that and then cups your face, running his thumb over your cheek to feel his bulk under the skin.

“You’re so good at that, little girl. Look at how you're sucking me off with your wet little mouth. You want to try taking me down your throat? You can do it, can’t you… for me?”

You moan at that and suck a bit harder, fighting the urge to sneak your fingers down into your panties, to rub yourself raw from Javi’s torturous words. That’s off-limits in your game. You know that if you chase your own pleasure, he’ll delay serving it up to you on a platter. And what Javier gives you is always ten times better than what you can give yourself.

Instead, you grip the root of his dick a little harder and moan again, before you slurp off and smile up at him sweetly. “Yes, Javi. I want to try taking your huge cock down my throat. I can do it.”

“Good girl,” he growls and grabs your wrists, hauling you up against him as he pushes your tattered dress down and off your shoulders. “Strip.”

You curl your arm behind you and unclasp your bra, dropping it to the floor. Your panties follow, and Javier gives you an appraising look, followed by a long sigh. His voice drops another note lower and he gives you one of your favorite commands: “Now me.”

You bite your lip to stifle a grin, and reach up for Javier’s shirt buttons, flicking them open as rapidly as you can. You toss it on the bed, then unbutton his jeans, grazing his cock slowly with your hand. You push his jeans down, down, down his strong legs, sinking to your knees as they drop.

You look up at Javi with wide eyes, palms flattened on the front of his thighs, patiently waiting for him to lead you where he wants you. Javier gives you that look again, like he’s trying to decide exactly what to do with you, and it makes anticipation build up behind your navel like nothing else. His cock is level with your forehead, and you incline your chin up to take a long lick of the underside, watching it bob there in front of you.

Javier sucks in a sharp breath and you try it again, dragging your tongue from his soft sac to the frenulum, finishing with a flourish at the tip. You look up at him and you can almost feel your eyes sparkling with eagerness. Javier toes off his shoes and steps out of his jeans, then he tilts his head toward the soft armchair next to the dresser. You get up and follow him there.

Javier sits down in the chair, legs spread wide and you kneel again in front of your man. This is where you’re going to prove to yourself that you can do it. You can swallow him all the way down and nuzzle your nose into his soft curls. You want to take him apart and make him shatter with lust at the sight of you. You want to win at this game that you love to play with him.

You open wide and take him in as far as the back of your tongue. You’re determined. Last time you did this you made it down to the last inch before you couldn’t take any more. Today will be different. You revel in Javier’s filthy praises as you relax your jaw and try to pace your breathing along with the bobbing of your head.

“Fuck,” he spits out with a huff. “Look at you go, taking me so deep.” You feel him hit the top of your mouth, just behind the ridge where your hard palate ends and the soft palate begins. You pause for a moment, afraid of gagging. Nothing happens so you breathe in through your nose and push gently, feeling him slide back until the head of his cock hits your throat.

“Oh fuck!” Javier’s hands grip the sides of your face and you pause. His coarse curls are just out of reach, a few centimeters from your nose. You pull back slightly to exhale, twisting your tongue around the underside of his penis and then angling your head just right to slide back down over his length.

Javier lets you set the pace, his hands are just holding you, not pushing, although you wouldn’t mind him getting a little rougher. You remember your breathing and repeat the steps, sliding his head past your soft palate until it hits the back of your throat. You do an experimental swallow, feeling your throat muscles contract around him.

“Shit!” Javier pulls you off, then drags you up to his face to give you a messy kiss. His tongue feels swollen, licking frantically inside your mouth in a gesture of gratitude for doing this for him, doing this to him.

“You look so good sucking me off. You want to see what a good girl looks like?” Javier reaches to the dresser just beside him and grabs a little hand mirror. He holds it near his chest, angled so you can see yourself. Your eyes are bright with a few tears and your lips are puffy and glossy, saliva running down your chin. You look wrecked but you feel powerful.

“Watch yourself go down on me, gorgeous. Your little mouth looks so good when you swallow me down like that.”

“Yes, Javi.” You wink up at Javier and watch yourself in the mirror as his fat head slips past your lips.

You’ve never seen yourself like this, and the sight of your petite mouth cinched around Javier’s broad penis makes you moan. You watch yourself slide slowly down his length, determined to get your lips around him all the way to the root where it meets his body. You feel his tip hit the back of your throat again, and you swallow, then push gently past the last little bit of discomfort to find that your nose is buried deep in his pubic hair, your lower lip and chin touching his balls.

Javier throws his head back and lets out a low moan, and you can feel the vibration of it in your core. You close your eyes and just sit with the feeling, letting drool slip out of the sides of your mouth. You exhale and then swallow twice more, and when you pull off you taste the tang of Javi’s salty pre-cum at the tip.

You grin up at him. “I did it, now you have to make me come again.”

Javier opens his eyes and puts the mirror back on the dresser before fixing his deep brown eyes on yours.

“No.” He shakes his head, and you feel your eyebrows draw into a scowl.

Javier laughs at your distress. “You were such a good girl that I’m going to make you come two more times.”

You squeal and playfully swat his leg, and Javier reaches down to grab you under your arms. He hauls you up on his lap to straddle him, and pulls a condom off the dresser. When he’s covered he wraps his big hands around your hips and helps lift you onto his cock. You moan and sink down onto him, and a chill wracks your whole body, stiffening your nipples into buds and raising goosebumps on your shoulders.

You grip Javier’s shoulders and throw your head back in ecstasy. You let Javier guide your hips, rolling you up and down as his breathing quickens. From this angle he punches deep, hitting something over and over that half tickles and half hurts. You angle your hips so that he hits it deeper and you wail. Javier brings one broad thumb down to your clit and gyrates the pad of it over and over and over. The circular rubbing motions make you gush, and you feel electric knowing that he’s doing whatever he can to make you feel good.

Javier presses harder and your climax washes over you. He pulls his thumb away as you throb and squeeze around him. You bury your head in the crook of his neck and let him hold you close while your orgasm burns itself out. Your head spins.

“That’s my girl. Good girl.” Javier cups one hand around your ass and strokes your spine languidly with his other fingers. “You came so hard around me, I could feel you.”

He shifts underneath you, and then stands up without pulling out. You wrap your arms around his neck and let him carry you to the bed, his huge hands wrapped under your thighs for support. He lays you down on your back and you pull your knees up toward your chest, opening your legs wide. Javier leans down to kiss you and then starts thrusting into you hard. You lift your head to look down to where your bodies are joined, watching his dick spear into you over and over.

“You like that? You like seeing how small you look when I’ve got you spread open like this? How’s it feel to have a big man fucking you into the mattress?” He leans down again and starts biting kisses off from you, pulling your bottom lip into his mouth with gentle suction and the blunt edges of his front teeth.

“Yes, Javi. Yes, I love it. I’m your good girl.”

“You are my good girl. You’re my girl. Look at you taking my fat- fucking- cock in your tight little cunt.” He punctuates his words with harder thrusts. “You’re my cute- tiny- fucking girl. I love your sweet- little- pussy.”

His hips start to falter, the rhythm getting sloppier with each thrust. You know he’s getting close and you wrap your legs around his hips, then you tighten and clench your pelvic muscles around him. He gasps and falls over you, filling the condom as you feel his cock spasm inside you.

When he’s recovered he grabs the base of the condom and pulls out of you, tying it off and discarding it into the wastebasket next to the dresser. He kneels back over you and peppers your face and neck with kisses.

“You got one more in you, pretty girl?” Javier sucks a hot, wet kiss to the hollow of your throat and you moan, tangling your fingers in his hair.

“Yes, Javi. Will you eat me out?” You kiss him and nudge his nose with yours, making wide eyes at him. “Please?”

“Oh, fuck yes.” Javier sits down on the edge of the bed and lies back, smirking at you. “C’mere and get a mustache ride, little lady.”

You giggle and leap up to straddle his face, lowering your cunt to his mouth as he grasps both of your buttocks in his big hands. Javier starts to lick your slick folds with enthusiasm, flicking the stiffened tip of his tongue across your swollen bud. He shifts his hands to wrap up and over the tops of your thighs, pulling you closer to his face until your clit is grinding over his nose, his tongue buried deep in your channel.

“Oh fuck, Javi!” You don’t have anywhere to put your hands for leverage, so you cross your arms behind your head and try to stay upright. Javier works his lips and tongue harder, shaking his head side to side in a rapid rhythm to make his nose brush your clit. You feel your third climax building quickly. You worry for a moment that Javier is unable to breathe, but then he tips his chin up and sucks your sensitive bundle of nerves between his lips, and you go careening off the edge into bliss.

You shake and fall forward over the bedspread, fully exhausted from the inside out. You feel Javier slide out from between your legs and then he drapes his form over you, sucking kisses into your shoulder blade while his hand wanders down to your ass. He dips his fingers between your thighs and you feel him lazily stroke between your puffy folds.

“Was that good for you? Did you get what you needed?” Javier sucks on your earlobe and you can only groan your assent. You nod, hoping he can see from the back of your head that you’re happy and spent.

Javier leans to nuzzle the side of your neck and then squeezes your asscheek with his big hand. “That’s my good girl.”

--- Javier Peña character masterlist

JHFTM Main Masterlist

“Everything bagel” tag list: @quica-quica-quica @anaaaispunk @justanotherblonde23 @gracie7209 @nicolethered @honestly-shite @driedgreentomatoes @dihra-vesa @1800-fight-me @the-queen-of-fools @juletheghoul @kesskirata @honeymandos @silverwolf319 @mourningbirds1 @greeneyedblondie44 @spacedilf @maxwell–lord @anxiousandboujee @cevvie @sherala007 @writeforfandoms @libellule2001 @deadhumourist @mandoalorian @javierpinme @eri16 @mandocrasis @pilothusband @bastillealmighty @eri16 @jitterbugs927 @babiiface95 @toomanystoriessolittletime @yespolkadotkitty @fisforfulcrum @prettylilhalforc @mswarriorbabe80 @littlemisspascal @wildemaven @coreychick @castleamc @coreychick @astoryisaloveaffair @fan-of-encouragement @nolanell

Plus some other troublemakers who seemed to like the first installment LOL: @kmorales1 @missredherring @sixshooter665 @axshadows @littlemissoblivious @taylorxargentina @oceanablue

#pedrostories #pedro stories #javier pena x you #javier pena x reader #javier pena x female reader #javier pena size kink #javier peña x you #javier peña x reader #javier peña #javier Peña x you #javier Peña x reader #javier Peña x female reader #javier Peña size kink #javier Peña fic #javier Peña fanfic #javier Peña fanfiction #pedro pascal characters #javier Peña smutfic #javier pena smutfic #JHFTM 300 Followers celebration #you ask and JHFTM delivers!

[iwishtobeastorm]

Back again! This time with Javier Pena x plus size!reader where the reader are friends with him and likes him but thinks he doesn’t cause she have seen him with pretty and skinny girls and every time Javi does something couple like she shoves the feeling away and tells herself that he’s just being friendly but in reality Javi does like her and the reason why he was dating other girls is because he wanted to get over the reader cause he’s like ‘she’s perfect but can’t ruin the friendship’ and yeah.. lol

“They could never compare to you.”

A/N: My dear friend, thank you so much for your another amazing ask, I enjoyed writing it so much! I hope I understood the assignment lol. Let me know!

Hearts on fire - Javier Peña/Plussize!F!Reader

Warnings: just pure fluff

Word count: 2700+

Masterlist

You come home, if that's what you can call your stinky old apartment, that U.S. embassy assigned you the moment you agreed to come down here to Colombia to work as Messina's secretary. You throw your purse on the couch and collapse there second later, kicking off your heels and leaning your head back, closing your eyes and letting out a deep sigh. You know this work might probably kill you one day, but there're things much worse than paperwork. Like Javier Peña.

When you first saw him, you knew. There was just something about him that made your heart do a little spin. You thought it'll be okay when you only see him at the DEA office, but then you found out your apartment is on the same floor as his. That's probably why the two of you became friends in the first place. But the closer you and Javi grew, the more you realized how lost you were. He is amazing, everything you wished for, if he wasn't a chain smoker and such a terrible womanizer. That's what hurts about it all the worst. The women he brings home, the women who scream his name in the middle of the night as he gives them all the pleasure you can only wish for, the gorgeous, tall girls with delicate bodies and long legs, so different than the image that greets you in the mirror every morning. What are you compared to them?

So you hold yourself back, not letting even a hint of your feelings for him pass by the barrier you've built around your heart, keeping yourself protected. You know he would never have anything with you, but you don't need to hear it from his lips, that would wound you up forever.

And he's not making it easy by any means. Today he brought you a cup of coffee and offered to drive you home since he had some business downtown. He does things like that pretty often, being sweet to you. You first thought it's normal, that it's just you imagining things, but then you've overheard Steve teasing him about it and the voice inside your head won't shut up about it ever since.

You let out a little groan at all of the messy thoughts and emotions battling inside of you. Javi is more than a big problem. Your feelings for him are like a tsunami. You're not able to run fast enough to escape it.

A bang on the door takes you out of your head and you literally jump to your feet, startled by the sound before female laughter and male rushed voice echo to you from the hallway and you follow the giggles all the way to your door. The voices faded a bit and so you open the door enough to be able to peek through, just to be met with Javi, leaned against the wall, clutching another of his pretty ladies to his body, squeezing on her barely covered ass and exploring her mouth, making her let out these little squeals as he pinches her flesh. He's so invested in licking inside her that he doesn't even notice the ajar door of your flat. Your gaze involuntarily slides over her form and you shut the door without thinking, your eyes filling with tears, your chest aching.

You didn't even realize how hard you slammed the door, until you notice the hallway is now deadly silent and you start panicking. This is not what you wanted.

You listen intently to the quiet whispers and ruffling on the corridor, before footsteps approach your door and you take a few steps back, praying to whoever is willing to listen to stop Javi from knocking on them, but it doesn't seem like the odds are in your favor today.

"Y/N?" Your name falls from his lips. You clasp your hand over your mouth to assure you won't let out a sound. You feel so freaking stupid. How could you even let that happen?

"I know you're in there, hermosa. Will you open the door for me?" He says softly and you shake your head, clenching your jaw to keep quiet.

"Come on, open the door. Let me- let me talk to you," his voice gets more quiet, gentler. He's pleading with you. But you don't think you'd be able to face him right now. Because of the lady and because of what you've done. He must think you're some kind of freak now, watching him making out on the corridor.

"Let me explain everything," he proceeds.

"There's nothing to explain, Javier," you respond, biting on your lower lip as tears sting in your eyes once again.

"So you are in there. Open the door, Y/N," you can hear the smirk in his voice and you curse yourself for letting you get carried away.

"No. You have company. We can talk about this tomorrow," you say, hugging your torso with your hands.

"It's not that important," he states.

"It looked pretty important to me," you can't help but deadpan, making Javi sigh.

"Open the door, Y/N," his tone doesn't leave room for arguing, but you still take extra time before you actually unlock it and open it enough to come face to face with your handsome neighbor, his arm leaned on the doorframe as his deep brown eyes watch you from underneath ruffled dark hair.

You know you're a flustered mess as your gaze meets his, but there's no way back now.

"What is it, Javier?" You murmur.

"Can I come in?" He raises an eyebrow at you.

"I think someone is waiting for you," you say, peaking over his shoulder to look at the ajar door of his flat.

"It doesn't matter. I need to talk to you," he states and you hate what this attitude of his does to your heart.

You make a step out of your flat, closing the door behind yourself and he uses it, backing you against it, his hands coming to rest on each side of your head, caging you there, making you look up at him surprised and at loss of breath.

"What were you doing here, huh, hermosa? Were you spying on me?" He gazes into your eyes and you feel the warmth flooding your face as you fight a gasp.

"I-I weren't spying on you. You banged on my door! I didn't know what was going on," you frown softly, the image of Javi making out with the woman rising on your mind, filling your chest with tension.

"Then why did you slam the door so hard?" He asks, his intense gaze making you anxious.

"Because- I- It was an accident. It just slipped," you say softly, the way you advert your eyes from his being enough of a sign to Javi that you're lying. It makes him smirk.

"Slipped? Are you sure?" He proceeds, leaning a bit closer, his cologne invading your lungs, making the breath you were taking hitch in your throat.

"Y-yes," you stutter, your eyes widening a bit as you look up at him.

"I know when you're lying, hermosa," he reminds you, his gaze burning through you in a way that makes something heavy sit on your chest. You feel even worse than you did before opening the door. Why is he doing this to you?

"I'm sorry," you say quietly.

"For what?" Javi doesn't really understand where are you taking this.

"I- I really didn't mean to slam the door, I just- seeing you there with the lady I- it doesn't matter. Have a nice evening Javi," you give him a short glance before your eyes full with tears and you push him away enough to be able to slip inside your flat without giving him any chance to stop you.

Javi stands there, breathless, his brain trying to frantically make any sense of what you just said. Your eyes flooding with tears keep nudging his mind, he hates to see you like that. That's one of the reasons you two became close. He found you crying in the bathrooms and after persuading you to tell him what happened, he was perplexed and angry. Some duchebag from their bureau had a very ugly comments about your body and the worst part was that you believed it. Javi always thought you're confident. He couldn't take his eyes off of you when you walked through the office with the little binders in your arms, your ass swaying underneath the tight skirt of yours as you held your head high, even though you greeted everyone with a sweet smile. But the reality was elsewhere. And Javi's blood was boiling.

You don't have to know that it was him who broke the guy's nose and made him apologize to you, roses and all. Since that, Javi made sure you didn't have a reason to shed a tear.

But now here you are and he feels like it's his fault, that's why he's banging on your door again, begging you to open it for him, but your flat stays silent.

"Hermosa, please. I- I'm sorry for everything, okay?"

You clasp your hand over your mouth to hold back the sobs as you sit on the other side of the door, pushing your knees up your chest, because that always makes you feel safer.

You wish you could tell him it's not his fault. You wish you could tell him it's all because of you. You wish you could tell him that you love him.

But there's no way in hell he'd ever feel the same and you'd lose him completely. You'd rather be there through it all, through all his one night stands and late night chats, than lose him because of your stupid feelings.

"Y/N, please. I know you can hear me. I'm sorry for all of this. I- I didn't mean to hurt you anyhow. I know I'm a dick," he mumbles the last sentence and it feels as if he leaned his forehead against the door.

Before you're able to respond, there's the lady's voice again, saying something to Javi in Spanish and he responds to her, his deep baritone carrying something serious and final, that makes you perk up. According to the lady's tone you'd assume she's scolding him and soon there're loud steps on the stairs and it keeps fading away, until the doors bang somewhere in the distance and the building gets silent again.

"Now we have all the time you need to talk. Would you let me in?" Javi asks and he's not angry at all. You thought he'll be when he gave up the girl for you. You didn't want it like that, you didn't want to make a scene. But here you are.

You wipe your tears and collect yourself before opening the door slightly and Javi doesn't wait for invitation this time as he slips inside, catching you by surprise. He closes the door behind himself and looks down at you with something close to worry in his deep brown eyes.

"Now tell me everything," he encourages, keeping his voice gentle, making tears sting in your eyes, your chin trembling, your gaze falling to ground to avoid him. He doesn't let you though, cupping your both cheeks and making you look up at him.

"It's okay, I just want to know the truth," he says, swiping his thumb over your cheek to brush away the tears that managed to escape your eyelids.

You feel like you're gonna burst. There's too much of it, bubbling in your chest and making you feel lightheaded. You've held everything back for so long and now it came to knock on your door in the least appropriate moment.

You look at Javi, meeting his sincere hazel gaze and you know you're about to ruin everything, but it has to come out. For your own sake.

"I- I love you, Javi. I know I shouldn't, but I do. I- I've been in love with you ever since I saw you but- I know you don't feel the same. There's no way you could love someone like me and that's okay. I just- I just can't take this anymore," you clench your jaw, looking down while tears run down your cheeks like water falls.

Javier is completely speechless. He didn't know this was it. He wouldn't even imagine - not in his wildest dreams - that you'd ever be able to feel the same. You're too good for him, too sweet, too kind, too soft. He's from the ugly rough world and you're like the little angel on the ceiling of the church where he comes each Sunday to confess his sins. You're innocent, you're beautiful, you're pure. And he's a monster, torn by his own guilt, torn by the world he's living in. But you made him feel it again, the warm heavy feeling in his chest that makes the sun look brighter and each morning easier just because he's able to see you that day. You made Javier Peña feel love again. And he was terrified at first. He thought it's just his mind playing tricks on him so he decided to not make a big deal out of it, but the longer he stayed, the closer you two got, the more he felt like there's no way he'd be able to breathe ever again without you by his side. And here you are, confessing the same thing he felt itching in his chest for months to him and telling him he couldn't feel the same. Why-

"Why do you think I don't?" He asks, making your brows furrow a bit at his question.

"Are you blind Javi? Look at the beautiful women you take home and then look at me! Is this some kind of joke?" You get defensive, stepping away from him to get rid of his hands, your gaze burning with hurt.

"No, no, it's not, hermosa. I just- I-," he doesn't know how to say it out loud. How could he explain that you're the only person who makes him feel alive? How could he ever put the adoration and love he has for you into words? You're a goddess in his eyes, too beautiful to ever be looked at by a unworthy mortal like him. Can't you see that?

"What, Javi? What is it?" You ask, desperate at this point. You poured your heart out to him and here he is, stuttering to you as if he couldn't just be honest with you and tell you he doesn't feel the same right away.

"They could never compare to you," he says softly and you freeze.

"What?" You murmur and he looks into your eyes, making a small step towards you and then another. You mimicry him by taking a step back until your back meets the wall and he traps you there.

"Those girls I bring home could never compare to you. They are just distraction. I- I need them because of you. Because otherwise I'd be here, begging you to let me worship you the way you deserve every night and I- I knew I couldn't. I love you too, Y/N. But I know I don't deserve you," he states, his jaw clenched tight and he's about to pull away from you, when your hands shoot out to him to cup his both cheeks, making him look into your eyes, the surprise mirroring in them tugging on your heart.

"You're the only thing I want," you whisper and before he's able to react anyhow, your lips are on his, soft and gentle, kissing him shyly, since you're still not sure this whole thing could be true.

But then his brain catches up on it all and he melts against you, his arms wrapping around your waist to pull you closer, taking the lead in the kiss and licking on your lip for entrance, which you allow, the kiss turning much more passionate, making you both hazy and breathless as you pull away, your eyes meeting, smiles stretching your lips. And you both know it. You know, that none of you would rather be anywhere else than right here, in each other's arms, with grins on your faces and hearts on fire.

------------------------------

Tag list:

@arminlator @pintsizemama @rosi3ba3z @lovelylostminds @lokigirlszendaya @Gabr-Marie @hypnoash

#javier peña #javier peña x reader #javier peña x you #javier peña x y/n #chubby reader #narcos #female reader #pedro pascal #200 followers celebration

[nolanell]

NOLANell's Fanfiction and Fanart Recommendations

Please heed individual warnings and ratings before reading or viewing!

These are some fanfictions and fanart I have found on here that I really love and want to share with my followers and anyone else who finds my blog. This is a WIP so I will add to this as I discover more things!

Enjoy!

Dividers by the wonderful @firefly-graphics

Din Djarin

Everything and More by @dincrypt - SugarDaddy!Din x Female Reader AU Series

For the Night by @dincrypt - Din Djarin x Female Reader One Shot

Siren by @ezrasbirdie - Din Djarin x GN Reader One Shot

Tied by @radiowallet - Dr. Din Djarin x Female Reader (First Assist) AU Series

Come Back To Me by @magpie-to-the-morning - Highwayman!Din x Female Reader AU Series

Glimpsed by @blueeyesatnight - Grogu POV, thinking about Din Djarin. Part of a series, linked in the piece.

Marcus Moreno

Caramel Latte by @moralesispunk - Marcus Moreno x Female Reader Series

Poorly Wired Circuit by @radiowallet - Marcus Moreno x OFC Sarah Bailey Series

Wish You Were Here by @wardenparker and @absurdthirst - Marcus Moreno x Female Reader Soulmate AU Series (NB: link is to Chapter 1)

Yes, Mr. Moreno by @toomanystoriessolittletime - Marcus Moreno x OFC Alice Baker Writer Wednesday Submission

Marcus Pike

Read You Like A Book by @the-ginger-hedge-witch - Marcus Pike x OFC Anne Series

The Farmer's Market by @ezrasbirdie - Marcus Pike x OFC Annie Christiansen Series

The Long Con by @youvebeenlivingfictional - Marcus Pike x Female Reader Series (Complete)

Marcus & Peanut by @pintsizemama - Marcus Pike x Female Reader Series

Pero Tovar

Driving Mr Tovar by @sirowsky - Modern!Pero Tovar x Female Reader AU Series (Complete)

In His Eyes by @moralesispunk - Blacksmith!Pero Tovar x Female Reader AU Series (Complete)

The Innkeeper's Daughter by @just-here-for-the-moment - Pero Tovar x Female Reader

Stranded Due to Weather in a Coffee Shop AU Ask - Pero Tovar x GN Reader (Part of 400 Followers Celebration)

Javier Peña

Oops by @pintsizemama - Javier Peña x Female Reader Series

Lay It On Me by @queenofthefaceless Javier Peña x Female Reader Series (Complete)

What's The Use Of Wonderin' by @youvebeenlivingfictional - Javier Peña x Female Reader Series (Complete)

Sick Day by @quica-quica-quica - Javier Peña x Female Reader (Prompt List Ask)

At First Sight by @queridopascal - Javier Peña x Female Reader (Writer Wednesday Submission)

To Perish Twice by @brandyllyn - Javier Peña x Female Reader Soulmate AU Series (Complete)

Frankie Morales

ForestRanger!Frankie AU by @the-ginger-hedge-witch - ForestRanger!Frankie x Female Reader AU Series

Fly Me To The Moon by @pilothusband - Frankie Morales x Female Reader One Shot

All Hail The King by @pilothusband - Frankie Morales x Female Reader One Shot

Wednesday by @asta-lily - Frankie Morales x Female Reader (Complete)

Of Cupckes and Cupid by @asta-lily - Frankie Morales x GN Reader One Shot

Frankie Dating a Plus Size Partner Headcannons by @softpedropascal (Ask Request)

Fixing It by @green-socks - Frankie Morales x GN!Reader One Shot

'Here, Take My Jacket' by @mando-forgive-me - Frankie Morales x GN!Reader (Request for Flufftober 2021)

Agent Jack 'Whiskey' Daniels

Conference Call Incident by @just-here-for-the-moment and @driedgreentomatoes (part of the Declassified HR Files Series)

'Is That My Shirt?' by @quica-quica-quica Agent Whiskey x Female Reader (Prompt List Ask)

Extra Pickles, Hold the Mayo by @absurdthirst Agent Whiskey x Female Reader (Writer Wednesday Submission)

Maxwell Lord

Rings by @honestly-shite - Maxwell Lord x GN!Reader One Shot

When The Cards All Fold by @yespolkadotkitty - Maxwell Lord x Female!Reader One Shot

Non Pedro Pascal Characters

Plethora by @fisforfulcrum (Poe Dameron [Star Wars] x GN!Reader One Shot for Writer Wednesday)

Poe Playing Guitar to BB8 by @clakearts (Poe Dameron [Star Wars] Art)

Stay by @the-little-ewok (Poe Dameron [Star Wars] x F!Reader One Shot)

Frogs by @gaitwae (Loki [MCU] x Reader Ask One Shot)

Loki Comforts a Friend by @theaudacitytowrite (Loki [MCU] x Reader Ask Drabble)

The Night Before Your Thesis Defence by @handmaiden-of-mischief (Loki [MCU] x Reader One Shot)

Loki Portrait by @themorningstar81 (Loki [MCU] Art)

How High by @brandyllyn (Santiago 'Pope' Garcia [Triple Frontier] x GN!Reader - part of a series)

The Godfather by @quica-quica-quica (Ben Miller [Triple Frontier] x Female Reader One Shot)

#frankie morales x reader #dr. din djarin x first #din djarin x reader #marcus moreno x f!reader #marcus moreno fanfic #din djarin fanfiction #frankie morales fanfic #agent peña #pero tovar fic #pero tovar x reader #pero tovar fanfiction #agent whiskey fanfic #agent jack whiskey daniels x reader #loki fanfiction #loki x reader #poe dameron x reader #poe dameron fic #ben miller x female reader #benny miller x female reader #benny miller fanfiction #santiago garcia x reader #santiago garcia fanfiction #triple frontier fanfiction

[themand0lorian]

Anything for You

Summary: A date gone wrong sends Javier into a tailspin, with you at the center.

Pairing: Javier Peña x Female DEA!Reader (no Y/N)

Rating:  M (Swearing, Canon-Typical Violence)

Words: ~7900 (AO3)

Tags: Canon-typical violence, language (cursing), protective Javi, Steve and Carrillo are also present, hurt/comfort, death of a minor character, references to drugs/police/DEA, mentions of blood and guns, hospitals, angst with a happy ending, extra soft Javi

Notes: Reader is not specifically plus size/etc but it is mentioned that she does not look like most of the women Javier sleeps with in the show--she is described as a unique personality, less than perfect when it comes to looks. This is based on the "Penelope" storyline from Criminal Minds! (AKA this is what should have happened then)

Part 4 of my 300 follower celebration! 😊

Dating in a foreign country was hard. Dating in a foreign country while also working for the DEA was even more difficult. Dating, in a foreign country, while working for the DEA, and looking like you, was downright impossible.

You had done okay for yourself at home, the lack of a language barrier allowing your jokes to land, prolonged conversations allowing your unique personality to shine through. But at the surface, you were curvy in all the wrong places, flat in all the others; you had imperfect skin, hair that never seemed to fall quite right; a toothy grin that looks too big on your face. You weren’t going to be Columbia’s next top model. You were never going to be the one who caught men’s eye, a fact that you struggled with since childhood but had slowly learned to accept.

As always, if there was a rule to be broken, there you would find Javier Peña.

Javier was the biggest flirt you had ever met. Making his rounds to the desk of every woman in the office, chatting them up. You heard all about his conquests, had even met a few of them when he brought them to the Embassy for one reason or another. All unbelievably beautiful, sun kissed skin, long blown out hair and soft, feminine features. Basically, these women were Columbian goddesses, and you were…you.

 Still, he had made his attempts, stopping at your desk on your first day to scope out the fresh meat. When you didn’t immediately turn to his beck and call, he cleared his throat at you.

“Listen, cariño, I need—”

“Cariño?” you scoffed. “I’m not your cariño, agent.” Javier looked like he had been punched in the gut, quickly starting to backtrack before you spoke again. “But I’ve been called worse. What do you need?” you replied with a swift smile, and Javi instantly softened in relief, matching your chuckle.  That day was the day that started the flirtatious, borderline inappropriate friendship you had with Javier Peña.

If you asked Javier, that was the day that he fell in love with you.

So you let him call you the pet names, let him compliment the color of your nails or your new bracelet; you always threw it right back at him. A particularly out-of-fashion tie, a warm salmon button down that brought out his eyes, a chipper “Good morning, Javi,” in an obnoxious sing-song as he passed your desk on his way in.  It was nice just to get some attention, despite knowing the flirtations were just his nature, and he didn’t mean anything by it. After all, you had also heard him wax poetic at Helen, the 75-year-old receptionist a few desks down with the same “sweethearts” and “baby’s” he gave to you.

Javier would never admit it, but the sarcastic sing-song greeting you gave him became the highlight of his day, starting him on the right foot. Giving him something positive, an excuse to smile before the bleakness took over. So when your familiar lilt didn’t pass his ears one morning, he practically stopped short at your desk, only to find you looking off into space with a sparkle in your eye.

“What, no ‘good morning, Javi?’” Javier is standing in front of your desk with a sly smirk, hands splayed across the wood as he leans forward. You’re usually all business, but he caught you in a daydream, and he’s going to milk it for what it’s worth. “What were you dreaming about?”

“Nothing, good morning Javier,” you squeak, all in one breath as you avoid his gaze.

“Cariño,” he says, almost scoldingly.

“Fine! I met a guy,” you reply with a shy smile.

“You did what? Where?” Javi replies, perhaps a bit too quickly, but you don’t seem to notice.

“At the bodega I go to every morning,” you reply dreamily, a smile plastered on your face as you continue to stare off blankly. “He was having trouble with his Spanish, said he just moved down here, so I translated for him.” Translations were your main role at the embassy; men too stubborn or dumb to learn a new language--or hopeless when it comes to pronunciation, in Steve’s case--kept you busy. Javi never really needed your services, but still made sure to stop by to ask a few favors when he could. “He—God, he was so hot, Javi. He was so sweet and thankful, and asked for my number—”

“And you just..?”

“Gave it to him,” you reply assuredly. ”Can you believe that? A complete stranger. Interested in me. He said he wants to take me out for coffee to thank me. Did I mention he was smoking hot?”

“Yeah, you did,” Javi all but growls, but then manages to compose himself. “I mean, it happens.”

“No, it doesn’t. Not to me. Not like this.”

“Not like what?”

“I am not the girl men see across the bar and write songs about, the one who catches their eye—”

“Cariño—”

“It’s okay! I’ve accepted it,” you reassure him, and it seems a little too rehearsed to be true. “It just—it usually, takes a while, you know?”

“Okay…so what’s the problem? You think he’s moving too fast?”

“Yes…no…I don’t know. What do you think?” you ask, looking to Javier for the first time, coming out of your trance. Javi lets out a gruff sigh as he sees Steve enter the office; the two have a stakeout planned for the day, and will need to get going soon.

“I think you should trust your gut. If you think he seems too good to be true, it’s moving too quick, then maybe you should walk the other way.” Your entire face falls; it was always one of your downfalls, allowing you to be read like a book. Even if you didn’t express yourself in words, your face could easily convey your emotions. Javier is too caught up in Steve’s entrance to even notice, instead walking off with the other man to their desks to prepare and leaving you to ruminate on his words.

You try not to get too caught up on Javi’s words—you trusted him, inherently. He was one of your best friends. But something felt off about his advice, and you chewed your lip trying to decipher it, only stopping when your desk phone wrang.

“Translation Services, DEA.”

“Uh…Hi? This is Julian? We met this morning at the bodega?” Your heart felt like it stopped as he confirmed your name.

“Oh…yeah. Hi, Julian, sorry, I didn’t expect you to be calling so soon.”

“Sorry, I just…I couldn’t wait to talk to you.” His words brought a coy smile to your face, and it took all you had in you not to squeak in excitement. “I was wondering if you’d let me make that thank-you coffee a thank-you dinner.”

“Oh, uh, you really don’t have to do that—”

“I know, but I want to. I’m…asking you out. Tomorrow night. What do you say?” His tone was genuine, eager, like he had been thinking about it all morning, but something didn’t sit right with you.

“Uh—to-tomorrow night?” you stutter, Javi’s words still bouncing in your brain. “You know, uh, I would love to but I think I’m coming down with something.”

“Are you okay?” he asked, sincere.

“Yeah…” you start, feeling guilty for lying. But Javi said this was for the best—did you believe him?

“Okay, well, maybe some other time, when you feel up to it. I gave you my card, my number is on there.”

“Okay, thanks Julian, I’m sorry, I have to go, bye,” you reply all in one breath, desperate to get off the phone before the guilt ate at you. He hung up pleasantly before you sucked in a deep sigh, turning his business card over in your jacket pocket. The first man in Columbia—no, scratch that, ever—was asking you out after a meet-cute, and you were…turning him down? Because of what Javi said? A deep crease formed in your brow as you continued to type a translation on a letter for one of the agents.

The stakeout was a bust, ending before it even got started when there was no movement for four hours. By lunchtime, the men had called it quits, heading back to the office to try another time. Javi still expected your crooning ‘good morning,’ but instead, took one look at your face and noticed your feelings immediately.

“What’s wrong?” You look at him in shock, but do nothing to try and school your features, sighing.

“That guy from the bodega asked me out, and I took your advice, and blew him off,” you lament. Javi tries not to look happy, instead nodding in understanding as he turns to sit on the edge of your desk.

“Oh—uh--Okay. Well, good. Something was definitely wrong with him,” he replies, avoiding your gaze. He’s unable to see the shift in your facial expression.

“Wow. You are some agent, Peña,” you retort sarcastically, and he finally turns to look at you to see your entire face morphed into a mix of rage and hurt. “You could tell just how ‘wrong’ he was from what little I told you.”

“Hey, cariño, I didn’t mean—"

“Tell me, Javi, what tipped you off about how ‘wrong’ he was. Was it that he was too handsome to want to go out with me? Or too interested in me, so he can’t be right in the head?” you spit, and Javi tries to blubber an apology, but you cut him off immediately.

“You know what, Javi? You may think you’re God’s gift to women, but you’re not. Just because you wouldn’t cross a crowded room to hit on me, doesn’t mean that a more perceptive, less superficial guy wouldn’t!” you yell as you stand, tears running down your cheeks. “There doesn’t have to be something ‘wrong’ with someone for them to show interest in me.” You stomp off before he can open his mouth again, leaving him gaping at your desk.

Javier avoids your desk for a few hours, not even looking at it, and Steve senses the discomfort when you walk over, sitting up straighter at his desk. You wordlessly hand Steve some files, and Javi’s mouth gawps as he tries to come up with something to say, only closing when you immediately turn your back on him and walk back to your desk. Steve watches you huff and sit down, and turns to Peña with an accusatory glare.

“She usually hands these to you, lets you call her sweetheart a few times,” he puts into the space between them, but Javi doesn’t look up from his work, even when Steve rests his feet up on his desk casually. “What did you do?”

“Nothing. She met a guy—” Javi sighs, barely looking up to grab another cigarette.

“Say no more,” Steve chuckles, moving his feet back down to lean closer to the man. “You know, when a woman tells a guy about her feelings, she doesn’t want him to fix her. She wants him to shut up and listen,” Steve imparts. Javi only rolls his eyes, muttering a curse under his breath at Steve’s failed attempt to produce some wisdom.

That night, you pull the business card from your jacket pocket. The edges are worn from you toying with it all day; it’s creased along one side, but still legible. You pick up the phone resolutely and dial the number, heartbeat matching the fast-paced ring on the other end.

Javier noticed you weren’t at your desk the following day, Helen informing him you had called in sick, and he worried he had done irreparable damage after his mistakes the day before. He could barely focus on the case; he had never been good with words, something that came so naturally to you that you did it for a living, and now he had messed everything up. He paced around the office, barely grunting a “hello” at the other women, and his mood didn’t improve much when he got home, trying to drown himself in tumblers of whiskey and local news.

He couldn’t sleep that night, but it was unlike the other nights that kept him awake. Instead of Escobar and narcos, it was the hurt on your face that haunted him, the way your entire expression changed when he mangled his words. He wanted to tell you everything, right there in the middle of the embassy, how wrong you were. That he would cross every room, every continent, every ocean to hit on you; that, while there is definitely something wrong with him, his feelings for you weren’t it. That hearing you talk about another man was like a gunshot to the chest. He had never even made it to the bed; instead, he picked up the phone by the couch, downing the rest of his whiskey before dialing your phone number.

After three attempts, three times hanging up before the beep in your voicemail chimed, he slammed the phone down, considering showing up to your place in person. After another warm swig of whiskey, he eventually decided instead to turn to the only other thing he knew to keep his mind occupied—work.

It was dark and completely empty in the embassy, most people having better things to do on a Friday night, yourself included, apparently. Javi poured over the same file dozens of times, trying to wrap his head around the words; he barely looked up from his desk when Steve barreled into the room, only illuminated by the small lamp in the corner.

“What, trying to make me look bad—”

“Javi.” Javier freezes and looks up at his partner due to his harsh tone, taking in his haggard appearance and the panicked look in his eyes, and his heart drops to his stomach.

You took the day after your blow up with Javi off from work, not willing to let him sour your mood even further. You had set up a dinner date with Julian that evening, and his sheer excitement when you told him you wanted to get dinner was enough to give you butterflies. You spent most of the afternoon primping; redoing your eyeliner until it made the perfect wing, changing between your favorite outfits; you even pulled the matching bra and panties set from the back of your drawer for the occasion, hoping someone else would get to see it besides you. The knock on your door filled you with nervous excitement, and with a final check of your lipstick in the mirror, your date begun.

Julian was dressed handsomely, wearing a sport coat despite the hot temperatures. Almost immediately he had gasped, telling you how beautiful you looked as he took your arm to walk you down the stairs. Conversation flowed easily, and he was ever the gentlemen; opening doors, pushing in chairs, he even caught you when you stumbled in your heels on the cracked pavement. Everything was easy with him; you were seated at the best table in the hole-in-the-wall restaurant he chose, and he ordered on your behalf, butchering his Spanish but confident in his tastes, telling you he was a chef. You spent most of the night making heart eyes over the table, chatting and laughing as the wine he ordered made you forget about Javi completely.

“So, you work for the DEA, huh?” Julian asks. Your eyes widen, but then he continues. “You answered the phone and said it,” he chuckles. You sigh in relief.

“Oh, yeah. You know. Just translations for them,” you try to play off your role.

“Well I’m sure you hear about a lot of interesting stuff. War on drugs and all that.”

“Yeah, I definitely see some weird things. Last week I saw something come through about this restaurant, actually,” you gesture to your surroundings. “But it was nothing. Just some dinner reservations,” you laugh, Julian following.

“Well, I’m sure you will do great things for them, bonita. Even if it’s just dinner reservations,” he counters with a sip of his wine, and heat rises to your cheeks as you give him a coy smile in return.

The rest of the night goes exceedingly well, Julian insisting on paying for the meal; he even goes and speaks to the owner when the check comes back with an error, getting some champagne on the house for his “bonita.”

The restaurant is only around the corner, so you walk home arm in arm, the conversation continuing to flow. You feel like you’re floating on air, so unbelievably giddy that this man—this attractive, smart, passionate man—would choose you. When you get to the entry of your apartment, you do the awkward first-date-goodbye, unsure if either of you want to kiss the other goodnight; he walks away without doing it, keeping with his gentlemanly ways and shoving his hands in his jacket pockets instead. You’re about to unlock the door when he calls your name again from behind you, and you turn to him, ready for a romantic kiss.

Instead, you’re met with his rigid body and slight scowl, about 10 feet away from you, and he speaks again. “I’ve been thinking about doing this all night,” he growls, a complete transformation from his previous demeanor, and raises a hand from his pocket to reveal a gun, pulling the trigger before you can even blink.

“What can you tell us?” Steve asks as soon as Connie makes her way to the waiting room; both Javi and Steve nervously pacing the floor with their hands on their hips.

“Gunshot wound, chest to lower abdomen. Happened outside her apartment, neighbor found her,” she says grimly, looking to Javier as he sighs heavily. As soon as you were brought in, other nurses had found your DEA badge in your purse, and Connie called Steve immediately. “She’s lost a lot of blood-- she’s in surgery now, but it’s touch and go.”

Javier fights the tears gathering in his eyes, insistent on staying strong. Instead, he looks to Steve.

“Get Carrillo to her apartment.” Steve nods, walking away to dial the Colonel. Javi nods at Connie, who scampers off to continue her shift; his only thoughts repeating his last words to you, your fight at the embassy like a silent movie.

Javier and Steve wait for hours, for any word of your condition. Despite it being the middle of the night, neither can sleep, neither can speak until they know the outcome of your surgery. Connie occasionally brings by snacks or water, but otherwise, the two sit in tense silence, save a few words exchanged.

“I—I was going to stop by her place tonight. But we got in a fight, and I—I didn’t think she’d want--” His head is in his hands as he speaks.

“It’s not your fault, Javi,” Steve soothes, glancing over every time the doors open to the rest of the hospital.

“If I was there, we wouldn’t be here.”

“Or you’d both be dead. Stop blaming yourself.” Javier tries to take his words to heart, but they mostly go in one ear, out the other, his mantra repeating in his head. Please come back to me, cariño—I love you.

Carrillo eventually makes his way to the waiting room. You had run several translations for him over the years, sometimes even translating his instructions to English for monolingual agents, and the worry was clear on his face. He knew just as well as Steve and Javier that something about this wasn’t right.

“There is nothing at the scene. No gun, no casing, no evidence,” he whispers to Steve, who nods, trying to keep the information from Javier. Javi’s been nervously cracking his knuckles and tensing his hands all night, but he hears Carrillo anyway, turning to them both.

“Nothing?” he growls.

“Nothing,” Carrillo confirms. “Looks like it may have been a botched robbery.”

“Nothing was taken,” Javier hisses back, and Carrillo rolls his eyes.

“Yes. Botched.” Carrillo knows it’s a copout, but without evidence and with most of his men focused on Escobar, it’s all he can provide. Javier ignores him as he gives Steve a few more details, only listening to his heartbeat in his chest. He thought it may have stopped when Steve found him in the embassy, but he hears it now, soft beats, and wishes he could hear yours instead.

After what feels like days, but is actually several hours, a surgeon comes into the waiting room calling your name. Javier and Steve jump to their feet immediately, but based on his face, they’re unsure what news they’re about to receive.

“The bullet went into her chest and ricocheted into her abdomen. She lost a lot of blood—things weren’t looking good for a while, but we were able to repair the injuries.”

“So what are you saying?” Javi rumbled.

“One centimeter over and it would have gone through her heart. Instead, she could walk out of here in a few days. It’s honestly a miracle she’s alive.” Both Javier and Steve release a collective breath, shoulders sagging in relief and hard frowns fading, the weight of the world lifted from them with the news. Javier sends a silent thank you to whatever god has kept you with him, promising a few Hail Marys before bed in retribution.

“When can we see her?” Steve asks, knowing Javier’s next question.

“She needs to rest. You can see her in the morning,” the doctor concludes, walking away as the men nod. Javi looks to Steve then, the lines of worry etched into his face starting to relax; but Javier is still livid, a newfound vigor coursing through him now that he knows you’re alive.

“We’re going to the scene,” he says resolutely.

“But Javi, Carrillo already—”

“I don’t care what Carrillo did,” Javier hisses back. “I don’t care about protocol, I don’t care if we don’t work this case. I will not rest until we know who did this—help me or not, it’s up to you.”

Steve chooses to help. It’s the middle of the night, but the two men made their way to your apartment. The area was taped off, but with a flash of his badge, Javier bypassed any barriers, taking in the scene. Your door was open, but below it was a pool of fresh blood, your blood, that turned his stomach. A few bystanders looked on, asking shouted questions as Steve talked to a few of the officers there, as well as the nosy neighbor who had found you, getting whatever details he could and jotting them in his notebook. He reassures a man at the edge of the tape that you survived and that the police were looking for the perpetrator before walking back to Javier to share his findings. Javi has been standing in one spot, eyes idle on the crimson pool on the stairs—he would pick it up, cell by cell, and put it back in your body if he could.

“They’re still saying robbery. Tries to mug her, she fights back. He shoots her as he’s trying to run away,” Murphy explains.

“How far away was he when he shot?”

“About 15 feet,” Steve answers, referencing his small notebook from his interviews. Javier walks around fifteen feet from Steve, turning to look at him.

“Hell of a shot if he was running.” Steve only nods, understanding the hidden meaning behind his partner’s words. This guy wasn’t running. This was intentional.

Javier’s back at the hospital before you wake up; for the second time in 24 hours, he thanks the God he stopped believing in that he’ll be there when you come to. Steve stayed behind at the scene, hoping to snap some pictures that may provide more insight into what happened, that may lead you to some deeper memory that will help them out. As soon as you’re coherent, Javier’s at your side, petting your hand soothingly.

“Hey, cariño,” he soothes.

“Javi.” Your voice is rough and garbled, but at this moment, it’s the best thing he’s ever heard, and tears start to form in his eyes. “Hey—no tears. Or—I’ll start to cry, and I’ll pop a stitch,” you joke, and Javier releases a watery laugh.

“How are you feeling, cariño?”

“Oh—” you breath heavily, head lulling. You’re with him, but your body is still processing everything that’s happened to it, and you are definitely not at full speed; pain medicine coursing through your IV. “Confused. Stupid--and like I just got shot,” you groan. “I never—never saw it coming. He seemed--so nice. Normal.”

“Wait, what do you mean? You knew him?” Javier asks quickly, and you nod.

“You were right—I should have trusted it—my gut,” you start, breathing deeply for a moment before continuing. “It was that guy—that I met at the bodega. Julian. I—I wanted to believe he was interested in me—” Tears start to form in your eyes at the memory.

“Cariño, stop—”

“No, Javi, I let my guard down, and look what happened—” Javier shushes you, brushing hair from your forehead as his brows furrow in concern.

“Do you have any idea why he would have done this?” he asks gently.

“I just—I just thought he liked me,” you cry softly, and Javier brushes a falling tear from your cheek. “I thought—I thought someone finally liked me.”

“Cariño, I—” Javier is about to spill his feelings lay his heart on the table now that yours was back inside your chest, but he sees you start to doze, and quickly changes course. “I’m gonna find out who did this, cariño, and when I do—” Javier snarls.

“Javier?” you ask lightly. “Just—please don’t talk about me like a victim—I--I don’t think I can take—it,” you struggle through your words before succumbing to sleep, Javier’s hand in yours.

Steve comes by later, pictures developed, and Javier repeats what you told him, save for some of the more personal details. Selfishly, he wants to keep your insecurities to himself—to hold them, mold and shape them into strengths in his own hands before giving them back. Javier struggles to remember any details about the man you may have told him, instead so focused on the fight between you and the jealousy that fueled him that he has little to go off besides the man’s name. The two look over the photos, deducing that the scene was likely staged to look like a robbery, and that the man probably used a revolver to avoid leaving any casings; the forensic counter measures indicated he knew what he was doing, and that you were targeted specifically.

“So why her?” Steve thinks aloud, and Javi can’t remove his eyes from your sleeping form to respond. “Random?”

“He randomly targeted a DEA agent?” Javi retorts, continuing. “She’s DEA, in Colombia, in the middle of the hunt for Escobar.”

“Yeah, but she’s not in the field. Wouldn’t it pack more punch to go after one of us?” Javier takes a movement to mull over the theory, but doesn’t get a chance to respond, as you stir and he rushes to your bedside, Steve on his heels.

You’re breathing heavily, quiet groans escaping and clearly in pain as your medications start to wear off. Javier again grabs your hand, Steve not mentioning the contact as he asks how you’re feeling. You still fight to give him small pleasantries, to talk about Connie or the weather, until Javier interrupts you.

“Do you remember anything about the man who did this, cariño? I know it’s hard, but we need to find him.”

“He said—he said he was a chef,” you stutter. “He ordered for us, at the restaurant. Said he was new to Colombia but still knew all the best food to order.”

“Where did you go?” Steve asks.

“That new place on 4th Street. La Fogata.” Each word is a struggle, but Javier and Steve both wait patiently to hear each word.

“Did you notice anything off while you were there?” Steve presses.

“I don’t know—I don’t, I don’t notice things like you guys do, I don’t see danger—” You begin to get worked up again, blaming yourself for getting into this mess. 

“Okay, cariño, take it easy,” Javier soothes gently, waiting for you to calm before speaking again. “What do you remember?”

“He—he smelled good,” you say almost dreamily, and Javier stiffens, but tries not to let his jealousy show. “He—he had on a sport coat and a fancy watch. He was—he was overdressed for the restaurant,” you recollect. “When—when he walked me home, he seemed nervous. I thought—I thought he was just afraid to kiss me goodnight,” you whimper, tears falling from your cheeks that Javier brushes away. He looks to Steve and shakes his head, indicating the time for questions had passed, but before Steve can pack up and leave, you seem to remember something else.

“Oh, and the check was wrong, at the restaurant. And he got up to talk to the owners about it—they gave us free champagne.” The men look to each other. “What?”

“Usually the waitresses handle wrong checks, not the owners,” Steve provides. “Could be nothing, could be something.”

The days pass with no new leads; eventually, the caution tape is removed from around your apartment building, the blood washed away by a summer storm. Javier and Steve were slipping in extra hours to work on the case, figure out who Julian could be, but with no leads and your healing progressing nicely, it was time for you to be discharged from the hospital for at home recovery.

Javier drove you home, stopping with you at the blood-stained steps to your apartment as you took them in and winced, grasping your abdomen where the bullet had pierced through. He led you from the stain gently, reassuring you that he would find this man, keep you safe, while guiding you all the way into your apartment. He had never been inside your place before, despite your long friendship—it was mostly reserved for work, any time he stopped by was just to pick you up. But it looked exactly as he would expect it to based on your personality, knickknacks and photos across every surface, a slight mess on a chair at the foot of the bed, half-eaten takeout in the sink. He takes in one photo of you as a child and people he assumes are your parents as you settle into the space again, placing some of your things away until you speak up behind him, approaching his back.

“Those are my parents. They died when I was 18,” you offer; not so much sadly, after all this time, but with melancholy all the same. “Mugged and killed by a junkie looking for his next fix.”

“Is that why you joined the DEA?” Javier muses, and you nod, running your hand over the frame.            

“Yeah. I think they would have had a heart attack if they saw what I was doing now,” you chuckle.

“I think—I think they’d be proud of you.” You nod with a shy smile, clearly overtaken by emotions, but work to change the subject.

“Well, Javi—you got me home. You can go back to your glamorous ‘Agent Peña' life now,” you chuckle. “I’ve got Carrillo’s guys outside.” Carrillo had agreed to station one officer outside your apartment until the criminal was found, mostly at Javi’s behest, but even that made Javier uneasy—he wasn’t kidding when he said he wouldn’t rest until Julian was found, and if Carrillo could have spared them, he would have the entire squad outside if he could.

“Cariño—I don’t know what kind of life you think I’m living, but I am staying here until we catch this guy, no arguing,” he replies decidedly. A warm smile spreads across your face; you were hoping he would stay but also didn’t want to intrude on his actual DEA duties. You had been put on administrative leave until you recovered, despite your argument that working at a desk would be fine in your current state, which meant you would spend most of your time at home for a few weeks.

The two of you get ready for bed in companionable silence, moving around the studio apartment like you had lived there together forever. You felt comfort in Javier’s presence, especially as he insisted he make up the couch, how he ordered in dinner, how he helped you climb into bed when you winced in pain. But once settled in bed, with the lights off, memories of Julian began swimming again, images of a muzzle pointed at you, bringing you back to that night and preventing you from sleep.

“Javi?” you whisper quietly, not quite wanting to wake him but wanting to test the waters.

“Yes, cariño?” Javier was awake, on edge as he listened to every sound in the apartment. He wanted to keep you safe, and so every creak or shout from out the window startled his racing heart; your voice the only thing to soothe him again.

“Would you—would you lay in bed with me?” you ask smally, and the apartment feels eerily silent as you await an answer. You needed him closer, needed to know he was there. Instead of a response, you heard the rustle of blankets, followed by shuffling and a dip in the bed on the other side of you. Javier settled in easily, both of you laying on your back and tracing patterns on the ceiling with your eyes, until you grasped his hand and squeezed it. You open your mouth to start speaking, but seem to rethink your action before starting again.

“Thank you, Javi. For everything.”

“Anything for you, cariño,” he whispers, squeezing back. Your eyes flutter shut almost immediately at the touch, falling into the necessary rest to heal your body, and Javier leans closer to you in your little double bed to look at your sleeping form, practically whispering into your hairline. “Anything for you.”

Javier hadn’t meant to fall asleep, but at one point you pulled him to you, nuzzling into his chest, and he was out like a light. You slept soundly for most of the night, Javi moving occasionally to fully embrace you as he slept. You both awake with a start to several loud bangs, much too close to your apartment. You scramble out of bed, unable to even process the idea that you were spooning with Javier Peña just before the commotion, running on pure fear. Javier is out of bed before you can come untangled from the sheets, on high alert as he peeks out the window to find Carrillo’s man dead in front of the apartment; shot, killed. He quickly ushers you away from the windows and doors and into a corner of the apartment, handing you a spare gun he had hidden on him as he speaks quickly.

“I’m going after him. If he comes in here, you shoot him, you hear me?” he says gruffly.

“Javi, wait—I-I don’t know how to shoot a gun,” you respond, holding the piece like it burned you. Your voice is shaking, your body is trembling; there are tears in your eyes, pure, unadulterated fear in your veins. Javier puts the gun in your hand, squeezing your arm in reassurance as he moves his other hand to his own piece.

“You do, cariño. Finger on the trigger and squeeze. Don’t move,” he responds quickly, leaving you in a panicked state as he sought out the source of the noise.

You heard gunshots ring out, each sound piercing through your body, each indicating that Javier could be dead. Your abdomen hurts at your stitches, your chest burns in fear. Your heart hurts most of all, at the idea that Javier could be dead and you would be the cause—before you could even tell him how much he really meant to you. You can hear yelling and swearing, heavy footsteps. In the distance you can hear sirens, but they’re much too far away, overwhelmed by your shaky breath as you tremble with the gun in your hand. Eventually, after a moment of quiet, you hear the shuffle of footsteps back to your door, and your finger goes to the trigger as fear courses through you.

Javier, unsuccessful in his hunt, throws the door open to find you in the place he left you, eyes wide in terror and shaking like a leaf as you hold his gun in front of you, barely aimed in his direction. He swears at that moment, he never wants to see you look like this again; like pure fear, like a ghost in the night. As soon as you see him, you drop the gun onto the bed, Javier rushing over to engage the safety before you collapse into his arms with a sob, the adrenaline and terror from the close encounter coming out through tears as you grip him for dear life. He holds you there for a long time, rocking you back and forth and brushing his hand over your head as you wail, half relieved to see him again, half petrified of what’s to come.

“Why is this happening to me, Javi?”

“I don’t know, cariño. I—I don’t know.”

“I—I just wanted someone to love me,” you sob. “Why—why—” Javier cuts you off.

“I love you, cariño. I love you, I love you, I love you…” He repeats the words over and over until you’re cried out, limp in his arms and breathing returning to normal. You’re practically curled into his lap on the floor, exhausted and eyes fluttering closed as you listen to his heartbeat. Once he thinks you’re asleep, Javier presses a soft kiss to your temple, lips barely brushing your hairline as he sighs. “God, do I love you.”

Despite the clear second attempt on your life, Carrillo still doesn’t have the manpower to defend you and fight Escobar, and so Javier moves you to his apartment instead, feeling better that the man wouldn’t know your new location. You never talk about your panic attack after Julian came to your apartment, or his words as he calmed you down. You figure he loves you like a friend, like friends do, and put it to rest at that, not wanting to make things more awkward than they are. You spend the nights in his bed, waking in the pale moonlight to nightmares of guns and chefs and blood on steps until he wraps his arms around you tighter, reminding you where you are. You wake in the morning to the feeling of his chest pushed to your back, to him holding you like his security blanket, and you certainly don’t mind; he’s yours too.

After a week with no further leads, you finally start the process to return to work. Javier is insistent you carry his extra gun for protection until he finds Julian, so you stow it in your purse, praying you never have to use it. He dutifully psyches you up outside the embassy, preparing you for what is bound to be an exhausting day; you don’t mention how exhausted he looks, every spare moment not with you spent working your case. Everyone is full of questions when you arrive, about the man, about the hospital, about Javier--but Javier shoos them away, even berating sweet old Helen for prying too much, leaving you to your backlog of translations as he worked at his desk, glancing up to check on you every few minutes.

After going through five or six, you begin to notice a pattern. You pull all the files, combining them into one, and at lunchtime, you hobble over to the café across the street with Javi and fill him in on your findings.

“Look, Javi. Every Wednesday, 3 PM, someone named Julio Rodrigo makes a reservation at La Fogata. That’s early for dinner, but late for lunch. And they’ve met there every week since it opened, and look at this—” you pull out another paper. “The name on the license for the restaurant is Julio Rodriguez. Very similar. Why would he need a reservation at his own restaurant?” you offer, and Javier nods, running his hands over his mustache in contemplation as he finishes his cigarette. You’re outside, chatting over lunch at rickety metal tables, but you hand him your findings, food forgotten.

“Thanks cariño. You’re right, it is strange. I can look into it,” he frowns, picking up his trash and yours to lead you back to the office, the file you put together tucked under his arm. You chat on your walk up the stairs, general banter between you restored despite your new nightly routine, despite Javi’s spoken words and your unspoken ones, until you stop dead in your tracks in front of the glass doors to the Embassy.

“What’s wrong?” Javi asks immediately, worried you aggravated you injury on the stairs.

“That’s him, Javi. That’s Julian,” you whisper, terrified. Steve is inside the bullpen speaking with a man Javi’s never seen before, but he immediately goes into agent mode.

“Are you sure?” You shoot Javier a glare, and he nods, pushing you toward the restroom outside the embassy. “Stay in here. Lock the door. Do not come out, you hear me? I will deal with it,” he explains, not giving you any time for questions before turning back to the main doors, gun holstered at his hip.

When Javi walks in, he’s seething. He knows he can’t come in and shoot, too many bystanders in the line of fire, Steve included, despite the fact that’s all he wants to do. He needs the man to verify his identity somehow, but without being suspicious. Steve seems to sense something is wrong with this guy, taking his tip diligently but skeptically until he stumbles over a few words.

“Does anybody here speak Spanish? It would be easier for me,” the man asks Steve. Before he can respond, Javier steps in.

“Sorry, no. Our translator is in the hospital.” Steve looks at him incredulously, but seeing Javier’s face, immediately agrees.

“Oh—she is the one who got shot?” he muses, and the partners exchange a look; that wasn’t exactly common knowledge, hundreds of gunshots happening throughout the city in any given week. “I am surprised she survived.”

“Modern medicine, I guess,” Steve counters sarcastically, clearly on the same page as Javi, recognizing the man’s unusual behavior.

“She—she must be good, that translator,” the man eggs on. “Probably goes through a lot of shit to get the good stuff, a lot of dinner reservations.” Javier stands with a start, recognizing the topic—dinner reservations. The man is talking himself into a hole to prove his identity. He seems to catch on, moving instantly to hold Steve in a headlock with a gun from his pocket pressed to his temple. Right away, Javi has his own gun pointed at the man as well as several other agents, and he tries to talk him down. As much as he wants to shoot first, ask later—he also wants answers.

“I don’t know what you’re doing, man. You’re in a room full of agents.”

“Yes—agents that were getting too close,” he hisses.

“La Fogata—that’s your front, huh?” Javi questions, Steve struggling to get out of the man’s grip. Javier takes his non-answer as an affirmative. “That’s where you sell your cocaine from? And you take women there on dates, then kill them?”

“She was getting too close—she was figuring things out—” the man shouts, agitated and holding Steve tighter. “She needed to be disposed of, and I will dispose of you all, too, if I need to.” The man ignores Steve, keeping him immobile in his grip but moving to point his gun at Javi instead. A shot rings out; quick on the draw, deafening and shattering, practically shaking the walls of the embassy.

Javier is surprised to see the man go down, Steve released from his hold and blood pooling on the ground; it takes him a moment to take stock of everything. He’s alive. Steve’s alive, and unhurt. The man who shot you is dead on the ground, in a pool of his own blood; but he didn’t shoot him. He looks up to see you standing in the doorway of the Embassy, hands shaking and the glass door in front of you shattered.

As agents and officers gather to deal with the body, Javier jogs up to you, taking the gun gingerly before embracing you with all his might.

“You didn’t listen to me,” Javier starts, and you roll your eyes, still a little in shock that you were finally safe, after weeks of panic. “I’m so proud of you, cariño.”

“I—I couldn’t let him shoot you,” you whisper, eyes still on the body in front of Steve. People are moving around it, covering it, making phone calls; Javier spins you in his hold so you’re facing away from your attacker, him facing the man instead.

“I—I’m so sorry, cariño. I never wanted you to have to do that,” he whispers into your ear, petting the back of your head.

“I—I didn’t even blink,” you confess sheepishly, Javier unwilling to release his hold on you. “You—you do anything for the ones you love.” At that, Javier tenses; wondering if he really heard what he’s always wanted to. He gently releases you, holding you in front of him by the elbows to look you in your eyes, searching for the truth. “I love you, Javier.”

His eyes seem to morph through emotions; excitement, tension, landing on adoration as he gives you a small smile.

“I love you, too,” he replies softly, bringing his forehead to yours and closing his eyes softly.

“I know,” you chuckle, and his eyes snap open, pulling back with a quirked eyebrow. “You told me—or you tried to, over and over. And I believe you--now.” He chuckles too, genuine and watery, before meeting your eyes again, and pulling your face back to his. When you close the distance, connecting your lips in a chaste, small kiss, it ignites the feelings between you. Javier wants to devour you like a man starved, to jump your bones right here in the office after waiting for so long to hear those words, but finally feels a sense of humility. When he pulls back with a broad smile, you mirror him, taking in the various people surrounding the office to deal with the aftermath of the shooting. “Looks like it’s getting a little crowded in here,” you offer, half smirking, trying to hint at him to take you home.

“Cariño—I would cross every crowded room in the world if it led me to you.”

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[nerdieforpedro]

Drawn in The Void Chapter 2: Where is the Ice princess?

Javier Peña x Roxanne Taylor (plus size OFC)

Fanfiction is 18+

Masterlist / Javier Peña Masterlist

Summary: Roxanne has many thoughts about Javier. Javier has thoughts about Roxanne. Steve and Javier actually put their deductive reasoning hats on. Watch out for Connie's cookies.

Word Count:!

Warnings: masturbation, jealousy, cursing, sexism (Old dudes in suits, never changes, also 1970's), sex work, body fetish, scaring a secretary, possibly poorly translated Spanish), rather dirty thoughts in the office.

Chapter 1

Javier was rarely turned down by women, almost never. He usually was at least able to get a good rapport with them, maybe not as good as the secretaries, but at least sort of polite like he is with his boss Messina. But she’s his boss that’s a woman he wouldn’t touch just for employment reasons. Roxanne was a tough nut to crack. It’s why he called her ‘princesa de hielo’ (ice princess) she was so tightly wound like she had an iron rod up her ass. Instead of talking to him, she left Peña notes reminding him to catch up on his paperwork. Last night was the first time he had really spoken to her, and he had many more questions than answers: 

Why does she carry a revolver instead of a standard issue pistol?

Why was she really here late at night, just for work? 

Why did she never talk to him? Those notes are passive aggressive.

Had she never really shot anyone? She was way too collected for that. He thought she was just in general affairs, administration, whatever the hell it’s called. Was she married? Had she ever been married? Does she have family? Where did she live? 

Is she even interested in anything fun?

Javier Peña doesn’t like questions without answers. His knew the other agents generally, and he knew way too much about Steve and his wife. He even knew a little about his boss in that she liked her coffee with one cream, two sugars. He would get Agent Messina some when he usually has some out-of-scope operation he and Steve wanted to do. Peña left for the night and met up with another working girl to unleash his frustrations on; from Escobar, from the ghosts of those he served beside him that were now pages on a report, the emptiness of knowing he would just coming home to whiskey and cigarettes and now, questions he had about Roxanne.

After Roxanne got home, she took a cool shower, not cold because she got sick the last time, she did that. After the shower, she popped on one of her old cotton nightgowns, drank some ice water and tried to sleep. Listening to the ceiling fan running a over her, thoughts lead back to Javier and that damn ass of his in those jeans.

“It’s two in the morning. Dammit.”

His hand on his hip, looking pensive and he reviewed cass files, he would smile and laugh with both the other agents and secretaries, though with them he was flirtatious, touching her hands, arms, shoulders. A few of them their lower backs. 

Roxanne had walked in the break room to get some more DEA strong and yet still didn’t have enough caffeine. 

The female agent’s hands roamed her own body.

Javier was behind Maria, one of the secretaries she had fired due to sleeping with that man. He appeared to be saying something in her ear that made her laugh as his hips swayed with hers, hands on them swirling in circles. 

She pinched one of her own nipples through her gown, her other hand trailed over her belly, she started to moan. “Fucking Peña. Community dick. Is there a Rolodex you use to decide who you’re going to fuck next?

A small moan left Maria’s lips, Javier purposely reached over her for a cup of coffee and told her.

She used her arms to prop herself up on her pillows so she could better reach her own heat. It was throbbing, begging to be touched, the back of her nightgown had a damp spot on it. One finger touched her clit and she jolted, trailing down the finger entered her dripping hole, and she said his name. 

“Hasta luego (later) Maria.” The man said as he walked out of the break room and by Roxy, not acknowledging her presence.

“Javier…you damn…pandejo (asshole). Acting like I’m not there, just because I’m not one of those skinny puntas (bitches). Shit.” She inserted a second finger inside of herself, pumping slowly. 

Her phone started to ring, she let it go to voicemail as she was not at all interested in who would be calling her home at this hour. The voicemail picked up and it was Messina, complaining that she wasn’t picking up her phone and she better not be sleeping through her call. Roxy groaned, stopped her fingers and tried to slow her breathing; she didn’t realize she was panting. Masturbating to that man…what was wrong with her? After she calmed down, she called Messina back.

“Hey boss. You called? Is it urgent? I’m trying to get a few hours' sleep.”

“Normally I would wait until tomorrow morning, but you’re needed for an op.”

“Huh? I haven’t been in the field since…”

“I know, but it require’s a woman’s touch. A woman who has some meat on her bones. As those old, wrinkled assholes said.” Messina sighed heavily. She knew what she was asking of Roxy, selecting her because she was a large woman. None of the secretaries and the few female agents they did have fit the bill. Plus, she knew if anything happens, Roxy could take care of herself.

Roxy got the gist of why Messina was asking this of her. She despised it, but if it could even give a silver of a lead to Escobar so she could go home, away from this war and away from Peña, she would do it. “What do I need to do?”

“Whatever tight dress you have, put it on and go to ‘El club del Melocotón dulce’ get a drink or two and try and get the attention of Jose Ruíz, he’s one of Gustavo’s enforcers.” Roxy’s eyes widened; she knew that name. He was basically Escobar’s number two.

“But how will I know it’s him? This Ruíz? What will I have to do to get close to him?” 

“The usual, suck up to him, hopefully get him to talk. Any way you can. He goes by ‘La Remora.’”

Her eyes rolled, the thought of possibly having anything remotely sexual to do any cartel members. “Fine. Just pick him up and what info her has and get it. Does it have to start tonight?”

Messina laughed, “No it can start tomorrow night. I hadn’t called to bug you for a while. You’re doing a great job with the office.”

“This is something you could have told me tomorrow, Boss.” Roxy’s rubbed her eyes, thankfully now she was getting tired. 

“Roxanne.” Messina said sternly. The hairs on the back of Roxy’s neck stood up.

“Yes Boss.” 

“I really do need you to take care of yourself, especially during this operation. I can’t lose you, you’re one of the few who listen to me no questions asked. Look through your closet tomorrow morning and let Blanca know what to take care of while you’re busy.”

Blanca was the most capable to the secretaries, she should be able to distribute the work fairly. “Sure.”

“Just remember, keep safe and no community dick.” Messina laughed as she hung of the phone. She knew Peña irked her to know end.

“She would say that. Ugh…” Roxy laid back in the bed and thought about what she might have that’s sexy. Nothing came to mind. She hasn’t been shopping in years and that was before she came to Columbia. She didn’t need anything sexy; it wasn’t required of the job. “Where do you even shop for stuff like that? Do they even have my size here? Dammit to hell…” her mind ruminated and she was becoming anxious. On the plus side, she wasn’t thinking about Peña anymore.

Javier arrived at the DEA headquarters at noon. He got some sleep, fucked a bit more and slept a bit more; showered and came to work. He did bring coffee for everyone though, which the office appreciated, except Messina. 

“Agent Peña, where the hell have you been?” She asked, walking right up to his desk. Agent Murphy slid his chair back so he wouldn’t be between the two of them. He wasn’t going to say anything and see what happened.

“Good afternoon, Ma’am. I was told by our benevolent office manager to get some sleep and come in later. I feel fresh.” Peña gave a shit-eating grin, he had been sitting with his legs crossed but eased back in his chair and opened his legs wide. Messina was pissed but knew she had to actually check with Roxy to see if this was in fact true. She shot him a dirty look and returned to her office, calling Roxy immediately.

“Yes boss?”

“Did you tell Agent Peña to come in late?”

A long pause, followed by a small gasp. Roxy’s face squinted. “I did. I take it he abused it? Did he even come in today?” She asked, she had been in her office reviewing things with Blanca and told the young woman that she was heading over to another office to help organize that one too.

“He did. He even had the gall to spread himself out like those old winkled bastards do. Stupid Peña.” 

The agent couldn’t help but laugh, she was glad she wasn’t the only woman he seemed to piss off. They were a party of two it seems. “Ma’am I’m going to finish briefing Blanca and the head out early. Don’t let the community dick bother you so much.” She laughed as her office door open; Blanca had entered with Murphy, a quizzical look came upon her face.

“Well hell freezes over sometimes, I didn’t think you ever laughed Agent Thomas.” Murphy said as he stood next to Blanca. The secretary nodded in agreement and handed her a folder. 

“What’s this?” Roxy asked as she looked the blank folder, it was heavy with papers. Blanca mouthed ‘Messina’ and she understood. She would look through it when Steve wasn’t here. Setting down, she looked up at the gringo, curious what he was here for. “I’m assumed you didn’t pop in here to see if I can laugh or not Murphy.” 

“I don’t want to but I gotta ask for some help on this one, I keep submitting requests for us to have more back up when we’re doing raids but there’s an asshole who keep rejecting it because of some form technicality. Any way around that?” He asked, Blanca had left at the word raid, she didn’t like hearing it, her younger brother has gotten killed in one of those raids by Escobar’s men. The secretary ran into Javier who asked her were Steve was, she paused since Roxy, and he were talking through something, but he took off those shades and flashed her his dark brown eyes and she pointed toward the manager’s office.

Steve was standing in the doorway finishing up, joking about how it would be easier to strong-arm whatever pencil pusher was making things so difficult since they wanted to raid one of Escobar’s production compounds. Agent Thomas smiled and said that it would only lead to more papers in between him and disrupting more of that devil’s empire. Pencil pushers are meant to make sure that in case anyone is actually alive to prosecute, they won’t wiggle out on a technicality.

Peña listened in on the conversation. It almost sounded pleasant, why did Roxanne only talk to him like you would this wall? He hasn’t tried to sleep with the woman and was never rude that he could remember. Yeah, there was the issue of paperwork but what mattered is that it was done. In between fuck sessions and sleep, he concluded that it would be best to have whichever secretary was willing to help him, fill out the paperwork and he can review and sign. That way, his signature actually be on it. But what else could it be, was she really that petty?

Steve started talking about Connie’s cookies and how she was experimenting with different kinds of flavors, some good, some horrible. Roxy felt slightly salty toward Steve because he was Peña’s partner, but he wasn’t a bad guy, and he genuinely loved his wife if he ate a pistachio-honey-raisin cookie for her. It was very sweet.

“Murphy, that’s riveting, the talks of your wife’s misadventures with baking. So much so that it makes this one look like she was actually listening to you.” Murphy stepped back as Peña draped his arms up the sides of the doorway, standing wide. The hem of his shirt rose, and a peek of his belly poked out and she could see his belly button. Javier’s jeans hugged his hips as he looked straight at the woman seated at the desk. Her eyes flickered for a moment, then returned to neutral gave, betraying that she does not want him here. Her body stiffened from her relaxed posture a moment ago, her eyes squinted, and her lips pursed tightly. She had some thick lips on her. “Sorry to interrupt the little talk, but we,” he said pointed at Steve and himself, “Gotta meet up with some informants.”

The woman’s hands ran over the folder she had been given earlier, eager to read it. “That’s fine. Be on your way Agents.” She replied, standing up and walking across to the door, Steve and Javier stepped outside.

“Thanks for encouraging me to get some rest. It was well needed.” He said quietly. Javier was actually thankful. It had been a long time since he had gotten six hours of sleep in a row. The rest was spent, working out distractions, reviewing notes and drinking. 

“Good for you Agent Peña. See you later Murphy, tell Connie to not be too experimental, you’ll actually need to be able to go after Escobar unless she wants you to feed him some of those cookie flavors.” She laughed in Steve’s direction and softly shut her door, not looking in Javier’s direction at all.

“Well damn Steve how do you get her to warm up? Was there some coke in those cookies?” Javier shook his head as they stopped by their desks to grab their stuff.

“No, she’s actually okay. She’s one of those slow to warm types.” The other agent answered, doubling checking that he had his gun and extra ammo.

“Those are my specialty, Steve. I can’t figure her out. It’s like I spit in her coffee or kicked her dog or something. La princesa de heilo.” Peña muttered and grabbed his jacked as they headed out to the car. 

“You’re still the only one that calls her that, also it doesn’t help that you don’t follow any of the guidelines set up. They were a bitch to learn, but now I know where to look for stuff instead of digging around for hours.” Murphy smiled it had been quite a change to get used to a filing system and having a set place where files and materials were instead of which ever place had room, but it made pulling up information that had already found a lot faster which led to some better results already. Javier rolled his eyes, lighting a cigarette, Steve was right, but he didn’t want to say it. He stayed silent as they drove off.

“Ugh….I already hate the thought of this.” Roxy looked through her folder at La Ramora, her target. He favored the bar El club de Melocotón dulce, but more than that, his type. He was one that has a fat girl fetish. The worst kind, she has known too many men like that, they saw her as soft flesh to claim and not a person at all so that meant they could anything their sick little minds thought of doing to her. “Now I get why she apologized last night. Messina, you’re lucky I got your back in this broken ass boy’s club.” The club looked like one of few that employed women who were ‘plump like empanadas’ it made her laugh and then she thought about how she was hungry. Blanca came in a brought some coffee and a stack of papers, sitting down across from her desk. 

“So you review all these daily?” She asked concerned. Roxy nodded and took a sip of the coffee. It had four creamers and five sugars. An audible ‘mmm’ escape her lips. 

“Thanks for the coffee, Blanca. You’ll have to review them and put them on Messina’s desk for a final review before they’re faxed to the Miami DEA office.” The against explained then took a large gulp of coffee.

“Oh, Javier brought the coffee in for everyone. It’s amazing he knows everyone’s order like that.” She exclaimed before peeing at the open file on your desk. “Is that an op? You’re going in the field? That makes sense.” She mused.

Roxanne gagged on her coffee, the sweet Java bubbling back up the throat before she swallowed it back down. He knows how I like my coffee. How does he know that? I make my own coffee in the break room. I choked; I could have gagged on his dick while he was in that doorway. His sexy little tummy, I’d have pinched it while I suck him dry.

“Ma’am? Agent Thomas are you okay?” Blanca stood and smacked Roxy’s back trying to help.

I’d rather be getting smacked on my ass before he fucks me on my desk. I’d end up drooling on these forms.

Her thoughts were even more intrusive that this morning. After she had woken up, she masturbated not once but twice before finally getting dressed and rushing into work. She didn’t eat anything. Roxy waved Blanca away after her coughing subsided, she shot a dirty look at the coffee. Now when she drank it, she was going to think of him too.

“Yeah, only you and Messina know, so as far as you know, I’m helping out at another DEA office that needs to get organized.” She explained. “Do you know where I can get sexy clothes Blanca? That will fit me.” She added, embarrassed to even ask. Blanca gave her a few shops to try and told her to make sure she had multiple sizes of condors on her as well as some changes of clothes. Sex work wasn’t unusual in Columbia so most people either had done it at some point or knew someone who did. It just wasn’t talked about openly. Roxy was thankful for the information and headed out to go shopping. Her role as Sofia would be starting tonight.

It had been a week since Murphy and Peña had seen Roxy. Blanca was in her office and doing her best but seemed stressed out. Steve offered to help Blanca with some of the paperwork when they had downtime. Javier tried as well, but since he hasn’t cared to learn much about the process or system, he wasn’t much help. He decided to go to Messina as someone was clearly going on.

“Where’s the manager Boss?” He asked, plopping down in the chair across from her, she chuckled.

“I’m your manager and boss Javier, you need to stop wearing those sunglasses inside.”

“You know who I mean.”

“She’s getting another DEA office organized like ours. I’ll let her know she’s missed when I talk to her next.”

“Blanca’s stressed out, actually all of them are.” 

“Are they so stressed out that you haven’t fucked them? I think not, so they’re okay.” Messina say back and watched his eyebrows raise. “It’s an open secret Agent Peña. The only reason you’re not fired is because there hasn’t been another incident of people fighting in the building.”

Javier bit the inside of his mouth feeling like he has gotten caught red handed. It dawned on his though, was there another DEA office? Black sites sure, Columbian law enforcement of course, but a second DEA office? “There’s no other DEA office. We’re the only one’s out here. That’s why you had to come here.”

Messina gave him credit; she didn’t expect him to figure it out. “Yes yes. She’s still helping other law enforcement get stuff set up, we’ve got to be prepared on all accounts.” Messina explained. Though it was a lie.

“Is she doing her own operation? Does she have back up?” He asked, the pieces falling into place. 

Messina sighed. “She’s fine. It’s an assignment from the brass that they felt she was suited for.” With that she tried to wave Peña away.

To him, that only meant that she was likely working vice, he knew what female agents were usually told to do and even though he objected, the brass had a few of the secretaries help them lure some of Escobar’s men in. He couldn’t imagine the ice princess doing anything remotely like that. She was too cold for that, at least to him.

His blank look took Messina for a surprise. She knew the nickname Javier had given Roxy, ice Princess. She decided to tease him since he had barged in her office, “Are mad that your princess is only cold to you Javier? Or are you the type that likes it that way?”  His face puckered, loathing that Messina knew about the nickname he had for Roxy, the woman who managed to get under his skin and irk him to no end. He left Messina’s office, muttering under his breath, “This is bullshit. She can’t pull off that kind of job, she’s gonna get killed or worse.” 

He returned to Blanca’s temporary office and stared at her, she stopped and looked up at him, so did Steve.

“Agent Peña? What’s wrong?”

“You know Blanca. Tell me.” He asked in a dark tone; he didn’t have a playful look on his face. He was serious.

“Jesus Christ Javi, why you talkin’ to her like that?” Murphy questioned. Entirely confused.

“What op is she working? Who is she trying to get to?” He asked, not letting up.

Blanca bit her too and looked down. “S-She’s helping with another DEA office.” Javier scoffed at her poor excuse. At least Messina had said it with some conviction. Murphy thought for a moment.

“There is no other DEA office. That’s why I came here…Blanca what’s going on? Who’s he…Oh. But where is she then?” Murphy asked looking at Blanca who started to tear up.

“I-I don’t know. She just asked for some recommendations…I don’t know.” Blanca stood up and started toward the door, but Javier shut it and stood in front of it.

“Recommendations for what Blanca? What could she had needed your help with….” Peña’s voice trailed off. “Esa mujer loca (that crazy woman)…where did she go Blanca?” He sighed. Blanca was rather fashionable so it made sense to ask her clothes one might need to be a working girl. 

“I don’t know. She didn’t tell me. She just said she’s going after a fish.”

“A fish? Wait fish…fish..” Murphy memory had been jogged, he pulled his notebook out and flipped through the pages. There was one enforcer that was known for liking a certain kind of sex worker. Almost all the cartel likes sex workers but one ‘fish’ had a preference that most of the DEA didn’t fit. “I got his name, La Remora but I don’t know what he looks like, or where he hangs out at, other than Gustavo, he’s rarely with anyone else which Gustavo seems to like that way.” Murphy explains.

Javier was hating this more and more; it was bad enough she was going on her own operation but with such a heavy hitter? What was Messina thinking?

“We’re gonna have to find her before…”

“Before what Agent Peña?” Messina was at the door. “Roxy is a grown-ass woman and an excellent agent and one that I trust. You two capullos can run around shooting, destroying shit and fucking,” Messina shot a narrowed gaze directly at Peña on that last part, “But you want a well-trained agent to come back in a blow her cover because you’re worried?” Put that sexist shit in your hand smoke or jerk with it.” Messina seethed and slammed the door.

“Shit Javi, I think you really pissed her off this time.” Murphy shook his head.

Javier scratched the back of his neck. All his suave demeanor didn’t mean shit today. His boss read him for filth and poor Blanca was sniffling in the corner. He guessed had warmed to his ice princess after all and that’s why he was so worried. Peña gave Blanca a hug and apologized for scaring her. He then left the office and took a drive, leaving Steve to help Blanca with the paperwork.

#fanfiction #pedro pascal #writing #fanfic #pedro pascal characters #javier pena x you #javier pena fic #javier peña #javier pena fanfiction #javier pena smut #javier pena x reader #javier pena x y/n #javier pena narcos #javier pena x ofc #Javier pena x plus size female reader

[longitud-de-onda]

{un veneno} february: blossom

pairing; javier peña x female reader summary; a month into living in bogotá and your friendship with javier keeps getting closer. rating; t warnings; language. talk about sex. age gap (forgot about that for the first chapter) word count; 3.1k a/n; i want to be really transparent about this fic, and a lot of you fell in love with it so before you get super into it, just check out the longer a/n at the end of the chapter. january

un veneno masterlist

“I still don’t understand why you leave 30 minutes early on a school morning,” Emiliana said, walking out from the bathroom still in her pajamas.

“I like my coffee,” you were gathering up your things in front of the doorway, patting down your purse in search of your wallet.

“You don’t like coffee, you like that man,” she said. You looked up at your colleague, smirking at you from across the room.

“Of course I like Javier. He’s my friend. And the coffee is great,” you said.

“No me mientas, Y/N.”

“Would I ever lie to you? I’m serious, he’s just a friend. Do I need to remind you of Mateo?”

“Por Dios, don’t remind me of Mateo, I don’t ever want him here,” she said. That was fair.

Mateo was the guy you met two weeks ago, back when you were staying at the hostel. Another backpacker, like yourself. He was in Bogotá for a month, and you had been fucking since you first met each other.

When Emiliana’s free bed opened up and you moved in, Mateo and you had to keep your relationship out of the bedroom. His hostel room always had others around and your colleague didn’t deserve to hear you going at it all night. It had quickly turned into quickies in the bathrooms of the discos. Emiliana had come out with you one evening, and not even an hour into the night caught the two of you going at it.

“I promise, Mateo’s not coming here, and anyways, he leaves in a week.”

“Go have fun with your Javier,” Emiliana smiled, “Hasta luego, chica.”

“Hasta luego,” you replied, exiting the apartment and skipping down the stairs.

The café you liked to meet Javier at was four blocks away from your apartment, and relatively close to the Embassy. It was a little shop that was busy in the morning but always had an open place to sit down.

This morning Javier beat you there, waving to you from a window seat as soon as you walked in. Glancing at the table, you saw two cups of coffee and a glass of juice. No need to go up to order.

“Juice for today’s papaya,” Javier said as you sat down. “I didn’t know if you’d like it, but you’ve ordered the juice every day since we got here, so...”

“Papaya’s great,” you said.

“Thought you might like it.”

“Thanks,” you said. You raised the glass to your lips, letting the fresh fruit flavor wash over your tongue. Javier was right. You loved it. It may have been your favorite thing so far about Colombia: all the fruit and the green and the tropical-ness. Everything was so vibrant and alive.

“So, how’s Colombia been treating you? You’re going on, what? Five weeks?”

“Yeah, five. It’s been great. No thanks to you.”

“I buy you all this coffee for nothing?”Javier had a mock offended look on his face, and you giggled.

“Emiliana’s been great. 10 days in her house has fixed my back from 6 months of hostel hopping,” you said, “Plus my Spanish has gotten so much better.”

“Really?” he shot up an eyebrow, “‘Cause I haven’t seen proof of that.”

“It’s a lot better! You, of course, wouldn’t know because you order for me every chance we get.”

“Maybe I should stop, then,” he said, “just to hear your pretty voice speak some Spanish.”

“I don’t think you could shut up,” you said.

“You don’t?” he grinned at you.

“Of course not. How would you give me all those recommendations and suggestions you know I won’t listen to unless you order for me at every restaurant?”

“Then maybe I should work on being more convincing in English,” Javier’s eyes lit up and even though you were enamored from day one, you felt yourself sink even further into them.

“Maybe you should,” this was getting into dangerous territory, even you knew that.

Javier took a sip of his coffee and you mirrored him.

“Are you doing anything on Saturday?” he asked.

You looked up, trying to figure out what exactly he was really asking.

“No?” Mateo might have wanted to spend the day together before he left, but that could wait. Right? There was always Sunday.

“Good, I’m picking you up and we’re going to my favorite place in Bogotá, 10am, okay?” he said.

“10am? Javi, that’s early for a Saturday, I’m usually out all Friday night,” you protested.

“Then don’t. I’m picking you up at 10,” he leaned back into his chair.

“Mateo and I—”

“Tell Mateo he can take you out on Saturday night instead,” he said. “I only have Saturday off and I don’t think you’re gonna regret this.”

“I—fine,” you said. “10am, and it better be worth it.”

So far, everything Javier took you to do or found for you to eat had been worth it. That was the only reason you said yes. That and his smile that appeared every night in your dreams.

Javier was leaning out of the window of his car, orange aviators on and his cream-colored shirt halfway unbuttoned when you exited Emiliana’s apartment building and burst out onto the warm streets of Bogotá.

“Morning,” he said. “You’re looking pretty awake for someone who said 10am was early.”

“I didn’t go out last night, asshole,” you said, walking around to the passenger side. “It’s entirely your fault.”

You got into the car and Javier merged into the traffic.

“Why do you like to party so much?” he said, eyes sticking to the road.

“I like dancing.”

“Just dancing?” he asked.

“I don’t know. It’s fun,” you shrugged. You never thought about why. You enjoyed going out. Enjoyed dancing with people. Enjoyed feeling like you were part of something. Enjoyed making friends, even if it was just for one night.

“So where are we going?” you asked.

“It’s a surprise,” he glanced over at you for a moment before returning his eyes to the road. You were headed out into the most distant neighborhoods, further and further south.

“You’re lucky I’m the sort of girl that likes surprises,” you said.

Javier laughed. “You’re probably right. Last girl I tried to surprise got pretty pissed.”

“So you take all your girls out here?”

“No, only the pretty ones.”

“Shut up,” you had started giggling earlier, and at this point, it was a full-on laugh that made your stomach hurt, “You’re an asshole, you know that?”

“What makes you think that?”

“How many girls are you just friends with?” you asked. You knew he liked to sleep around. After only a month of knowing the guy, you had heard him talking on multiple occasions about his sexual escapades with the prostitutes of the town.

But he had to have others like you, work friends and acquaintances from around the city. Friends he didn’t have just to fuck. Someone couldn’t last for over a year in another country without friends to go out with. Yet you found yourself taking up his every morning and most of his afternoons. It probably wasn’t fair to his other friends.

“You’re the only one,” he said, the teasing tone in his voice gone.

Oh.

You looked down at your lap. The air in the car had changed. You didn’t know what to say. If you were the only one, did that mean you were the only girl he didn’t have the intention of fucking? You weren’t sure whether that was a good thing or not. Maybe it was a red flag? Maybe it was good? It meant he cared.

Javier flipped on the radio, soft cumbia pouring into the car. You leaned back, looking around as you reached the edges of the city and turned off onto a dirt road, heading into the mountainous jungle.

You wound up the side of one of the hills that towered over Bogotá, the car violently bouncing with every pothole and rock on the unpaved path. Where you were going, you had no idea.

Javier hummed along to the music. It briefly passed your mind that as a single female traveler, right out of college, you shouldn’t be trusting older men, especially those who took you to remote locations. But if Javier wanted to hurt you, he would have done so long before, right? You trusted him.

“This is my favorite part,” he said.

You looked around. The trees were as green as ever, damp with the humid tropical air. Everywhere you looked there were leaves the size of your head and thick vines dangling from high branches.

It was something out of a movie. Growing up in the USA and traveling around Europe lent well to fantasies of medieval villages and soft rolling hills, but here was warm and green and untouched. It was better than anything you’d ever seen.

The light grew brighter as the tree cover thinned, and Javier slowed down as you exited the jungle.

Bogotá lay before you, spread out and nestled in the valley. You were perched on the edge of the mountain, a small rocky outcropping, only a few meters away from nothing.

Javier jumped out of the car and you followed him to the edge.

“This is my favorite place in Bogotá,” he said, “I come up here when I need to escape the violence.”

“Violence?”

“My line of work isn’t exactly the most safe. I see the underbelly of the city, the stuff it doesn’t want you to know about. I come up here to see it from afar, remind me of how beautiful it is.”

You inhaled. You thought the city air was refreshing, and it was, compared to where you had been before, but up here, the air was pristine. It was fresh and close to the earth. You could hear the birds in the distance, sounds you had never once heard in your lifetime, ones that you’d never want to forget.

“It’s gonna be damn hard leaving here,” you said.

“Leaving?” Javier turned towards you.

“Yeah, when the school year’s over, in November. I want to keep traveling. I only just started exploring the world, there’s so much more.”

“I thought you...” he started.

“Yeah?”

“I don’t know,” Javier shook his head. “Why are you doing this? Living on the road. I get the feeling you haven’t spent this much time anywhere since you graduated.”

“I haven’t,” you said. “I got my English teaching certification before I left, and I’ve just gone where I’ve felt like going. I don’t know, I guess I just like not being tied down anywhere. I don’t have a lot of stuff to deal with. I get to meet people. I don’t usually stay in one place for more than a couple weeks.”

“Where have you been?”

“I started in Paris. That was sort of my home base. I’d spend a week there and then a couple away, and then go back. I did a lot of teaching in Portugal, and I worked at a bunch of hostels across Eastern Europe in exchange for a bed.”

“I don’t think I could do that.”

“I’ll admit, settling down, letting Bogotá be my home for a bit. It’s relaxing. Nice not having to worry about where to next and whatnot.”

“It’s one hell of a city. You’ve gotta be careful, cause it’ll make it hard to say goodbye to,” Javier said. He was looking out over the sprawling urban space.

It was the most colorful city you’d ever laid eyes on. A couple small skyscrapers dotted the skyline, and green parks and tree-lined boulevards peeked out between the buildings.

“I’ve said goodbye to lots of cities. But it’s never a goodbye, is it? More of a ‘see you later,’” you said. You knew this to be a truth, one that many didn’t ever understand. You just wondered when this ‘see you later’ would be. And how hard it might be to pry yourself away from the people you had already grown to care for.

“I’m paying today,” you said, sliding into the seat. It was your fourth lunch date with Javier, and while you had split the morning café trips evenly, he had taken the load for the lunches. He always excused it as being the only one with a full-time, well-paying job.

“Alright, I guess there’s a first for everything,” he laughed. The skin around his eyes crinkled and the laugh came from deep within his chest.

“You have no idea how great it is to take my lunch away from the school,” you said. “I love the kids, but eating in the teacher’s lounge? It’s a nightmare. Emiliana teaches literature, so she’s on the other side of the building and I get funny looks if I try to eat a packed meal there.”

“I still don’t get why you want to work in a school. You graduated. You’re done. And you go back?”

“It’s not that bad,” you said, laughing to yourself at the hypocrisy of your statement. “The kids are alright, especially the younger ones. They really want to be there.”

“Better than spending day after day in an office, surveying recordings of drug dealers talking about the latest fútbol game.”

“Is that what you do?”

“No,” Javier groaned, “Not usually. But it’s what I’ve been doing for the last four days. It’s got me completely stir crazy.”

“That sounds awful,” you said.

The waiter came over to take your orders, and two of you slipped into easy conversation as you waited for your food.

One of the things you had missed most about having a stable life was friends. On the road, you had friends, but they were people you might have only known for a week or saw once a month when you accidentally crossed paths. If you weren’t traveling with someone, you had no one who could fully understand what you were going through, what you were doing, how you were feeling. Emiliana had been that since day one at school, and you were more thankful every day that Javier and you had grown so close as well.

Maybe you should have put a bit more energy into making friends who were closer to your age, but everyone in that category who was interesting to you was also temporary residents. People who came and went. You didn’t live near the university, and nights at the disco weren’t good for making lunch dates.

“So Mateo left?” Javier asked as you received your plates.

“Yeah, a couple days ago,” you said. It was probably for the best. You had become close very quickly, and yeah, Mateo was good—no, great—at sex, but the last few days with him you were starting to imagine another face instead of his own.

“That’s... unfortunate,” Javier was moving his food around the plate with his fork, staring down at his lap.

“We went into knowing there was an end date,” you said. “With people like us, there always is. Occupational hazard, sort of.”

“You don’t ever want something more?”

“Sure, someday. But I’m 22, I’m not looking for a husband or anything.” To be perfectly honest, you did it for the sex and the parties. That’s why most people did it. Either for sex or for companionship through a few countries. “It was fun, and, it’s not really over. Just open-ended. By December I’ll be traveling again, and who knows? We might run into each other. It happens all the time.”

“So you just go through your life having short flings? What’s the point then?”

“What’s the point? It’s fun,” you laughed, “And don’t you do the same thing? You visit the brothels all the time, I’m pretty sure that’s fun.”

“They’re informants,” he looked up at you, now smiling again.

“Sure they are, Javi,” you said.

“It’s different though. What I do, that’s not a relationship, it’s just...”

“Fun?” you filled in.

“I suppose so,” he said. He took a long pause before continuing again. “I was engaged once. Left her at the altar. I couldn’t drag her into all this, the DEA, it was too much.”

“God, Javi, that’s...” you didn’t know what to say. You didn’t think Javier was the sort of guy who would do that. He cared too much about people.

“It’s bad, I know.” Javier’s face flushed, but he knew it was the right decision. She was with someone better now. He hadn’t loved her as much as he thought he had. If he had, he would have gone right back to Texas. “But the whole dating thing, it’s supposed to mean something, isn’t it? You have sex with someone once, you can forget about them. Twice, and it’s maybe a coincidence. But three times? When you’re not paying for it? Then it means something.”

It was almost the end of the month. Emiliana’s daughter would be back in two weeks. You still didn’t have a place.

And instead of going out searching for one, you were heading over to Javier’s apartment for a drink.

He was given a place in an apartment owned by the embassy. Javier complained often enough that he hadn’t gotten to stay in the embassy complex where they had a full maid service and more consistent air conditioning, but it was full when he was assigned here. Supposedly he’d be moved when a single apartment opened up, but those were in high demand and DEA agents just didn’t get priority.

He knew you were coming over, so you walked up the outside stairs and found his name on the phone plate. You were about to push the button so he could buzz you in when some couple exited the building. You caught the door and slipped inside.

You jogged up the steps to the third floor where Javier’s door was. A woman, not much older than you, wearing a short pair of shorts and a black top that showed off most of her body, was exiting his apartment. You chuckled to yourself as she walked by you and down the stairs.

You knocked softly on Javier’s door, not sure if you really wanted to see him so shortly after whatever had happened. You heard a bit of shuffling before the door opened. He was fully clothed, thank god, you had no idea what would have happened if he wasn’t.

“So...” you said, smiling, “Who was that?”

Javier paled. “That was, um, she—”

“One of your... informants?” you asked.

“Yeah, I, uh,” he started.

“It’s fine, I know what you like to do,” you said, pushing past him into the living room. “Just, right before having me over? Cutting it a bit close, don’t you think? Or do you just run a tight schedule?”

Javier closed the door, and seemingly more relaxed. “I didn’t mean for it to go as long as it did.”

“Javi? Too much information,” you said, “Just tell me, can I sit down on the couch? Or does it need to be wiped down first?”

“Y/N? Shut up,” Javier was smiling that perfect smile again as the two of you burst into laughter.

next part

a/n; so i’ve been thinking about this fic since i started narcos, cause i don’t buy that javi is the way he is with women and emotions and alcohol because he left some woman at the altar. someone had to have done something to leave him like that. 

so i was listening to un veneno by c. tangana and niño de elche and the lyrics really hit me as javier, and so this was loosly inspired by that. i’d highly recommend watching the music video if you don’t speak spanish since it’s really well translated there. it’s also sort of in the vein of call me by your name. 

that said, this does end before season one and leaves javier as the person he is in the series. it’s gonna be sweet and fluffy and smutty, but it’s going to also be angsty, and i might have an epilogue in mind. i just don’t want to be misleading about it. if you want to be removed from the taglist becasue of this, i totally understand and am not offended at all, since this is really a passion project that i’m writing for myself. once mistakes like this is over i will be writing another multi chapter that’s a bit fluffier and less heavy and pretentious.

taglist; @pascalisthepunkest @turquiosenights @stillfangirlingbtw @mando-vibes @flower-petal-blooming @spookyold-saintjm @enchantedrhoses @creamysacrilege @lolwhateverlol @murdermewithbooks @nerdysuperchick 

im so sorry if tumblr isn’t letting me tag you. i always come back after an hour and try to fix it, but i can’t always

#javier peña #javier pena #javier peña x reader #javier pena x reader #camila writes #rated t #under 5 #reader #angst? #angst #fluff #pedro fics #narcos fics #javi x reader #un veneno fic

[nerdieforpedro]

The Brave, the Bold, The Dirty - Fanfics that I adore

Volume 5

All fanfics on this list are for readers age 18 and up, please respect the author's tags, warnings and notes as they're there so you know what's in them. Read at your own risk.

Room 1918 by @megamindsecretlair (Nomad Steve Rogers x Black female plus size reader)

Sweet Treat - Part Two by @mrsmando (Frankie 'Catfish' Morales x plus size female reader) Follow up to 'Sweet Treat - part one.'

La Petit Mort @boliv-jenta (Joel Miller x reader and Dave York x reader) Dark Fic

Misfire @qveerthe0ry (Dieter Bravo x GN reader)

Fluffer by @proxima-writes (Dieter Bravo x PA female writer)

Hey Good Lookin’ - part one and Hey Good Lookin’ - part two by @gwendibleywrites (Chubby shy Frankie Morales x plus size reader)

Lemonade Sparkles by @frenchiereading (Frankie Morales x female reader)

Watta Man - A Marcus Pike Story by @atinylittlepain (Marcus Pike x female reader)

O’ Christmas Tree by @covetyou (Dieter Bravo x GN reader)

Lingerie by @604to647 (Din Djarin - modern AU x female reader)

Once in a Blue Moon by @whatsnewalycat (Dieter Bravo x female reader)

Hold Harder by @sin-djarin (Tim Rockford x female reader)

Christmas Indulgence by @movievillainess721 (Jack Daniels x plus size female reader)

Cowboy Hat Joel x Reader (an ask) by @theywhowriteandknowthings (Joel Miller x female reader)

Oh, The Wildflowers by @adora-but-ginger (Joel Miller x GN reader)

A Nanny for Christmas by @absurdthirst (Dave York x plus size female reader)

Baker Wonderland by @integra1127grimmreaper (Javier Guterrez x plus size female reader)

Consummating the Riduurok @beskarandblasters (Din Djarin x female reader)

Consent by @fuckyeahdindjarin (Dieter Bravo x female reader)

White Christmas by @absurdthirst (Joel Miller x female reader)

Symphony by @maggiemayhemnj (Joel Miller x Jersey - OFC)

What the Heart Wants by @artemiseamoon (Pero Tovar x female reader)

Javier Peña & His Sweetheart (Chubby Peña) by @beefrobeefcal (Chubby Javier Peña x female reader)

Please check out everyone's listed fics and master lists! Don't forget to reblog and comment, writers love interactions. 🥰

#Nerdie's fic recommendations #pedro pascal characters #fanfiction #pedro pascal #pedro pascal fanfiction #joel miller #din djarin #frankie morales #dieter bravo #the mandalorian #pero tovar #Dave york #Marcus pike #Tim rockford #Steve Rogers

[nerdieforpedro]

Weekend Update 03/10/2024

Made it another week Nerdie.

That I did. I believe today is Sunday. Too much time in this chair. I think I slept in it before. Too many times.

Nerdie, don't you have a bed?

I do, I don't always make it there. I've usually zoned out and nodded off, the wake up when my neck hurts. 👀 I'm not always writing either, just thinking sometimes.

Couldn't you think in bed Nerdie?

I could, but I don't. That sounds like a good idea. My ideas aren't always great. But I did have a few this week.

My March Spring Prompts continue. I was able to do ten of them without repeating a character! 🤗 This upcoming week we'll see some Pedro peeps come back. Key words: gas station sushi, angst, oil and bath. Remember this is Nerdie 😎, it could be any and everything, but my prompts are mature and not explicit. I do write about some heavy subjects, fluff, a few giggles, and have some innuendos, but my main masterlist is 78% smut so just go there.

The WIP I’d been mentioning for the last few weeks or months (could be either) is finished and posted : Diddle your Dieter to Disco. My first Dieter smut actually which is hilarious at least to me. 🤣 The rest of his Masterlist is fairly fluffy. I would check the warnings on it, I put a lot in it. 👀

Part Two of my series The Lake Between Us is up. Make sure to read the warnings. Ezra introduction has a lot going on. It's an AU so he has both arms but that doesn't mean I didn't torture him other ways. 👀 I do love that ya'll love the taglist name "Taste-testers of Ezra's gumbo." 😆

I finally wrote the follow up to He told me his name called She made me feel. I think I enjoy mentally torturing Pedro characters at this point. Poor Din is so anxious and touch-starved. As always with Din = HANDS. A Nerdie staple. This is The Way.

Now for everyone's favorite (and mine): Fic recommendations!!! (Yes I did type and do a little yell, fanfics are serious. Pfft.) 😄

Confetti by @secretelephanttattoo (Marcus Pike x f reader) The Quiet Moments Collection

Adrift with you by @morallyinept (Frankie Morales x Jude OFC) The Prologue “I’m behind”’😭

A Real Man by @pedroshotwifey (Frankie Morales x female plus size reader) my request - stay self indulgent everyone! 🥰

Tick by @ramblers-lets-get-ramblin (Frankie Morales x wife reader) The Mistress of Angst!

A Bronx Tale: Part Deux - A Chicago Tale by @justabovewater20 (SydCarmy)

Love’s a weed:  just ripe by @tinytinymenace (Frankie Morales x ofc - Ruby) Fruits are essential.

Second Chances part 2 by @pedroscurls (Marcus Pike x fem reader) Such a cute series 💕

Cigarettes After Sex by @immarocketman (Awesome artist I follow. 💜)

Promise by @criticallyacclaimedstranger (Ezra - dragon x fem reader) The only Pedro character that can pull off being a dragon. 🐉

Please Mister Please by @grogusmum (Joel Miller x fem reader) The fluff 🥹💕

Unconventional Location by @winniethewife (Abel Morales x fem reader)

Personal Shopper by @huntingingoodwill (Dieter Bravo x reader)

Enjoy the Silence by @strang3lov3 (Joel Miller x fem reader)

Spicy Ask #68 by @kewwrites (Din Djarin x reader) Say it with me: HANDS 🙌🏼!!!!

Reminder by @criticallyacclaimedstranger (Tim Rockford x fem reader) Sometimes good things happen in Tim’s office.

Forever Starts With You Masterlist (Frankie Morales x chubby fem reader) @criticallyacclaimedstranger I loved all three parts I read 🥰🥰 (A Good Start, A Strong Finish and A New Beginning). It looks like there more to their story so much more reading for me. ❤️

some good friend by @covetyou (Tim Rockford x fem reader) TIM DESERVED THIS ❤️ That is all.

Sanctuary by @thefrogdalorian (Din Djarin x GN reader) Din fluff forever. 🤗

We got your back chapter 1 by @softpascalito (Javier Peña x fem reader)

The Sweetest Melody by @noisynaia (Din Djarin x afab reader)

Rise by @sp00kymulderr (Joel Miller x afab reader) ALL THE FEELS 😭

Falling for you by @fhatbhabie (Joel Miller x plus size reader) Part One - The drama!

Just look at You by @ramblers-lets-get-ramblin (Poe Dameron x fem reader) The Poe Dameron smut we deserve. 🍆

Chapter 3 - Here’s a health to the company… and one to my Boss… by @inept-the-magnificent (Tim Rockford x ofc Jane Nebbie) I just think about this series and I start giggling. Sunshine Nebbie and grump Tim - he is a super grump. But he is also me. 🤣

To the Flame chapter 6.5 by @pedroshotwifey (Dark Javier Peña x fem reader) So sweet out of context.

To the Flame chapter 9 by @pedroshotwifey (Dark Javier Peña x fem reader) The slow decent begins...we're just at the start of the ride. 😈

Between the Sheets by @saturn-rings-writes (William Tell x fem reader) Reminded me of an Isley Brothers song. I feel like we're headed toward that song. Please with this direction.

Hiccup by @morallyinept (Javier Gutierrez x fem reader) A whimpering Javi G. What an evening. 😘

A New Home by @charethcutestory02 (Frankie Morales x Benny Miller) Budding feelings. 🤗

Special shout out to Ms. Payday - Le Poet and lover of da words: @maggiemayhemnj They seek her out, have brunches and nightcaps. It's what all writers long for. She checked in on me along with @megamindsecretlair @angelofsmalldeath-codeine @magpiepills @ramblers-lets-get-ramblin and @lady-bess

I've been not as active - mainly due to work, school, and the insomnia. But still writing. 😄 priorities. lol

New appreciation for Javier Pena. well not new, re-newed. Maybe am working on a few things. None are good, none are final. Still need polishing. Also need to give Javi G's outline another look. I might...👀 have a chapter for him this week. I hope. @goodwithcheese was pleased with this. @undercoverpena was Luke-warm. I think she thought I was taking something, but if Javi P has shown us anything, sharing is caring. 😘

Stay well, sleep in your bed (unless you're planning not to) and be hydrated,

Love Nerdie 💕

#weekend update #Nerdie's weekend update #pedro pascal characters #fanfiction #pedro pascal #pedro pascal fanfiction #din djarin #joel miller #frankie morales #dieter bravo #the mandalorian #nerdie fic rec #fic recommendation #marchficmadness24

[nerdieforpedro]

The Brave, The Bold, The Dirty - Fanfics that I adore

Volume 1

Below are links to fanfics that I read and I love and will re-read. 🤗

This list is for those aged 18 and up, please respect the author's tags, warnings and notes as they are there for a reason.

Can you ever really know?

Author: @undercoverpena

Marcus Pike x reader (Soft Marcus plus smut makes for an excellent read.)

You were Marked Author: @handspunyarns

A dark series with a plus size OFC and Din Djarin. It has exceptional world building and demonstrates how two people can grow together despite challenges (as mild as a term I can use.) Pay special attention to the author’s warnings due to subject matter. (A series)

Trick or Treat Author: @spookykoolkat

Eddie Munson x plus size reader (Fun Halloween where the reader surprises her husband Eddie with a sex position she’d like to try on the couch)

Fifty Author: @linzels-blog

(Francisco Morales x female reader) Frankie goes all out for your 50th birthday complete with an outfit change.

Revenge Author: @toomanystoriessolittletime

(Dave York x female reader) Your husband is a cheating asshole and Dave helps you get even while breaking your soon to be ex-husband’ spirit.

Bloom into you Author: @wildemaven

(Joel Miller x female reader) Meet cute in reader’s floral shop. And excellent first aid. (A series)

Rises the Moon Author: @psychedelic-ink

(Joel Miller x female reader) Joel in a lighthouse. Beautiful haunting song with the waves as a backdrop. Two lonely souls.

Kinktober Day 14

Author: @youvebeenlivingfictional

(Oberyn Martell x female reader) Oberyn seeks a new thrill at a brothel. He tells you what he wants and you both enjoy. Excellent smut.

I work from nine to five, hey hell I pay the price

Author: @thetriumphantpanda

(Marcus Pike x plus size female reader) Our reader feels insecure at the Halloween party until she runs into her boss’ boss Marcus. Things go very well.

Observations Author: @ezrasbirdie

(Neurodivergent reader x Joel Miller) The reader doesn’t quite connect with the people of Jackson save for Joel and Elle.

The First Time Author: @fettuccin-e

(Frankie Morales x female reader) Frankie puts in the prep work for the reader to take him fully.

A Gift of Light and Joy Author: @prolix-yuy

(Javi Gutierrez x plus size reader) Javi plans a surprise for the reader. It doesn’t go as planned so he fixes it as only he can.

The Wolf and The Lamb Author: @morallyinept

(Dave York x Plus size reader) Dave York worships the reader’s body and devours you every time.

Looks can be Deceiving

Author: @rainontherooftops

(Din Djarjn x plus size reader) The reader is roommates with Din Djarjn for months. There’s a delicate balance. The reader’s date changes that.

I Got You Author: @yeollie-plz

(Javier Peña x plus size reader) Javier runs into you chasing a perp. He decides to chase you instead.

Icing on the cake Author: @beskarberry

(Pero Tovar x plus size female reader) Cooking for the troops of the Great Wall is mostly uneventful. Until a Spainard arrives and sticks his finger in a creamy pastry while holding eye contract with you.

Love is a Rebellious Bird Author: @artemiseamoon

(Ezra x plus size female reader) Insecurities coupled with angst makes for a confession that’s been months in the making.

Made to Hold You Author: @flightlessangelwings

(Din Djarin x plus size female reader) Pure smut. Din is a hungry man and when he arrives back to the ship, he won’t stop until he’s full. The reader is very pleased.

#fanfiction #fanfiction writing #Nerdie’s fic recs #pedro pascal characters #pedro pascal fanfiction #joel miller #din djarin #frankie morales #dieter bravo #writing #the mandalorian #Dave York #pero tovar #Marcus pike #ezra prospect